#can't we celebrate them instead of corroding them for once

[intermundia]

if i had to guess, i would say that i developed my strong feelings about the representation of jedi in canon versus fanon in the course of writing lex talionis, my jedi critical novel with unreliable narration and a fanon interpretation of the dark side. it may seem like i hate jedi critical stuff but i literally wrote a book on it lmao. in order to develop a compelling dark side obi-wan, i had to break him away from the order, and he had to feel right and justified, so i made sure to interpret every single thing the jedi do in the worst faith, and spin everything to the least generous interpretation.

as a result i know exactly how easy it is to read across and against genre, to make the jedi into something they are not, to abuse the concept of attachment, but it's not canon! it's a commentary on and reinterpretation of main canon; it changes the genre and tone of the story, and diminishes the spiritual significance of the jedi. when i did that, it's fanfiction, an erotic power fantasy predicated on rejecting the moderation and restraint of the jedi, foregrounding their flaws and undermining their virtues. i appreciate the value of that for sure, and am fine with disney doing it too, but it starting to feel like it's all we get.

my frustration comes whenever it feels like writers are speaking from the rostrum but with a latent contempt for the ideals of star wars. it's fine that they want to switch the genre of canon and find flaws in the forces of good, but deconstruction like that feels to me like a secondary and subordinate project to the main thread of canon rather than a story on the same mythic plane! you can read a million jedi critical stories on ao3, but i want canon to be where they are shown in their good and inspiring ideal form. that's the heart of my problem, i want the big canon projects to love the ideal of the jedi as much as i do and depict them generously and in good faith.

where else in our culture am i going to find a philosophy and community as inspiring as the jedi, if not in star wars, where they belong? they're why i'm here. i want canon to give me something beautiful and true to react against for my fanfiction, not just giving me only expensive fanfiction, you know? i have plenty of edgy fanficfion at home lol. i crave myth. i understand my opinion is completely warped by the fact i've written 750k words of star wars analytical erotica but it is what it is lmao