#c: looks like cooking isn't a force skill

[justsomeno1s]

Basil - Kel Omori RoleSwap AU

(Stars I need an actual name for this thing-) This is a collection of Notes and Thoughts I have about my interpretation of the AU! Please understand- I've been working on this with an IRL friend who hasn't played through the Faraway segments and doesn't know the Truth yet (soon, but not as of this point), so I haven't had a good way to brainstorm about it yet.

ALSO: I know I may seem somewhat incoherent at points, as a lot of things are based on my and said friend's interpretations of the characters. I'll try to explain if requested.

Headspace will be different! Since Kel (an active force) is replaced with Basil (Significantly more passive), major events and places including either or both of them will have to be changed to keep working, and some character dynamics will be shifted. The fanfic will mostly be the group's adventures through Headspace- As if it were an actual game/mod.

Pre-Vanishing below Read More:

Omori's greeted by Hero, Aubrey and Basil, ofc. Kel isn't part of the initial group because "Kel and Aubrey have been going at it again.' ... 'It’s to the point where Kel won’t even come into the Neighbors room if Aubrey’s here."

Basil's wearing sleepwear, and Kel's got a more awake outfit! The most important thing about this is that Basil's got his Jump Rope as a belt (Where else would I put it?) and Kel has a blanket cape. I'm gonna draw or sprite them later, b/c I'm completely in love with the idea "

Basil still has a flower crown! It would be equipped as a weapon, but he uses his Jump Rope as a whip in fights. When the friends disagree or fight, it starts falling apart and dying faster- Aubrey's Stuffed Toy quest is replaced by Basil needing to find a replacement for his current crown. (Would be called Flower Crown, or something similar) (Bonus: Basil infodumps about each kind of flower in his crowns when he first gets them)

I write the characters as having EMOTIONS (like the colored auras) even out of battle. Kel would experience 3rd tier EMOTIONS, and goes MANIC before he goes missing because he gets over-excited about something.

No watermelons- Instead, there are cardboard boxes or pillows that Omori can slice apart. (Kel can't take care of plants, but he and his brother are Master Blanket Fort Makers, after all! Plus, I figure Kel would be a crafty kid)

Hero's a bit more proactive in this so far, physically stopping Kel and Aubrey's fights and calming Kel out of MANIC. He'll probably be a bit more high strung as well, since he's looking for his little brother. (I kind of want to have him be the one to cry after Space Ex-Boyfriend- "He's not here either... Sniffle... God, I'm such an awful brother."- but I'm not sure if that makes enough sense to put so early.)

Kel has a Camcorder! Its digital, and he uses it to record any and all things he thinks he should remember/are interesting enough. Its a secondhand, off-brand device that he uses so much he's dented it and worn off some of the paint. [In reality, the viewer's been snapped off, and its lost/hidden somewhere in Sunny's house. Kel got it for his birthday the year before the recital, and used it whole year. His parents recorded all of Hero's events- The spelling bee, the cooking competition, and such- and told him that 'we record things so that we can remember them and watch them again later', so he wanted one that he could use on his own.]

The tutorial sections are actually just for Basil! Kel goes into battle and bring Basil with him so that he can teach Basil how to fight and use his skills. (Would break the fourth wall a bit, but Canon does the same, so I'm not too torn up ") (Everyone but Basil would basicallly start at level 2, reasoning that they do fight monsters on their own.)

Kel's got some OP battle skills, because he doesn't stay on the team. [Also, way, way farther than where I am in writing rn- Black space involves Kel fighting of dangers on his own, and I want it to be an overconfident into overwhelmed kinda thing "]

Kel's "Basil's house/garden" equivalent is a Blanket Fort set up between a mountain and forest, with half for Hero and half for Kel. Kel's half (the primary focus) is a sunset colored living room, filled with blankets, pillows, stuffed animals- the usual kind of stuff you might find in a sleepover. (I think? idk I'm weird) It has shelves of movies and comic books, themed by who likes what, and a wall spanning projector screen so they can watch them. It would be the fourth wall if in a game/mod, and Kel would get yoinked after it starts playing his memory of the Truth. [My friend had the idea of him calling out to Sunny before he gets got, b/c we're both shipping trash and Caprisun is The Good Shit, but I'm not sure it makes enough sense.]

I'll talk about a bit more soon, but I've got a thing today, so. It'll have to be later. Soon " Feel free to interact/Give ideas/Tell me it's unrealistic- whatever! Will respond asap "

[harukisakisblog]

Yandere scaramouche

FEMALE READER DNI

Author side note: I try to make it gender-neutral as much as I can and I think I do a pretty good job in it? Anyway, there's the word "boy" in it I hope you don't mind. Also, this is my first time writing about scramouche and I try a new style. Hope you like it

Scaramouche is definitely a possessive yandere, once he get to taste the love he want he got addicted to it quite cute don't you think so?

You can try and run away from him as much as you like. But he'll always be there just waiting for the day you lower your guards and just when you thought you're safe he showed up and take you back with him. Even if that mean he need to tied you up or worse ... Maybe cut off your leg?

It's okay! Human usually have 2 leg even if he cuts one the other one could still be use right? But if you don't want one of your leg to be cut off maybe act like a good boy and he'll consider it. Shh....don't cry darling, as long as you'll be a good partner he has no need to cut off your leg or any other part of your body right~?

To be honest, it's quite a hassle to handle you, sure you're cute and so sweet and all but can you stop with that glare? Want him to gauge that pretty eyes out? The thought of it...not bad. He will be the only thing you can feel, there's no need for that (e/c) to see someone else anymore. Haha, won't that be good?

Ah ah ah, I forgot you also need to properly dress take your pants idiot! But...if you don't want to wear pants, he won't mind as long as he's the only one who gets to see them. *ahem* anyway you must remember being a partner of scramouche meaning you must fit in everything. Dance, elegant, look, talk, anything. If you dare embarrassed him in front of everyone...surely you don't want that right?

So then! Let's start with your routine! What? What do you mean you don't want to do you need scramouche to force you himself? Sure but don't go screaming okay! You're the one who asks this yourself- no? Yosh! Now let's get to work

Morning routine

You'll wake up and find no one on your side because scramouche has already gone to his work, but that doesn't mean you'll be free his maid and butlers are always there to dress you up. Mmmh...which one do you think you like? A purple one or the black one? Either way, you look so stunning in both of those anyway.

Breakfast usually only has 2 types of food. The vegetables and the fruit. After all, you need to look good all the time so you must eat properly and eat healthy food all the time. Desert is forbidden unless it's dinner or you're going out on a date with him.

At 9:00 you will need to know how to act and talk, scramouche servant will teach you how to properly act like a noble. It doesn't matter if you like it or not. And even if you think this is only for girls who care? It's not like you need to wear a dress or anything maybe?

How about you stop writing so poorly? Look at your handwriting it's so- ugly!!! If people saw this they probably thought that you're a chicken! Now now, how about you stop with that glare and look at how actual noble writing skill is?

Who says becoming a partner is easy? Go on dance, we want to see how a commoner like you dance- what is that??? Hello? Are you sure this is how people dance because it looks like to me you only move your leg and hand, sigh you sure are lucky today. At least lord scramouche isn't here...yet.

What do you mean you don't know how to cook? Are you stupid or just pretending to move aside! You must know how to cook! What if lord scramouche asks you to cook for him?! And that the tea too! What? You're tired? Don't be a baby now stand up!

Evening Routine

Wow, you must be tired right? Since you need to do all of that just in 3 hours well you're in luck lord scramouche has returned! What do you mean not? Nonsense! Go and greet him like a good partner you are!

When you walk toward him you could feel that there's something wrong with the room. There are people but they all are wearing a mask? Why? And what did Kuni want? Your mind was filled with a lot of questions some of them got their answer some of them still don't.

He look at you and ask you to seat on the chair, before you eat he will ask you about your day! Aww isn't he nice? Hey! Answer him you idiot! Scaramouche will ask you 5 question (just to let you know this question is tricky)

1: how's your day?

You must answer it with 'yes' otherwise you'll get yourself in a situation where he either shocks you with his electro vision, or your hair gets pulled. Which one do you prefer? Saying no to a day would mean that you aren't satisfied with him, (obviously, you didn't) that would mean you to be ungrateful.

2: do you like your new home?

'Yes,' or 'no' there are 2 ways for you to say no- just kidding you must say yes and that's the final. I quite pity you for that. Well it's your fault for making him fall for you.

3: (M/N) want a dance?

Now, this is where that dancing practices come to the rescue! Scaramouche himself aren't very good at it, so all you need to do is just do the basic. Easy right?

4: do you like your food?

Let's see, there's your (food/N) and you don't like it, so what did you do? Just eat it. You won't get another food after that's it until it's dinner time.

5: Do you still remember about them?

Just nod and be silent, if Scaramouche is in a bad mood just say no, but if he is in a good mood just nod and be silent. Jealousy is a strong emotion and I agree with it. He knows you're lying but sometimes it feels good to see you trying to not get on his bad side.

Night routine

Aww, you must be so tired right? Well lord Scaramouche has just come back from work! Just to give you a couple of the last advice. Don't go and try to fight him this time. Someone tired and is probably in a bad mood is someone you don't want to mess with. Specifically him what? No, I wasn't talking or anything

You try to walk as slowly as possible without making it obvious, why did Kuni kidnap you? What did he want? All that you're getting is that you are "special" and all he wanted was just to "protect" you but from who and what?

After getting into the room, the maids and butler go right away, leaving only you two together. There's an awkward silence between you, and him.

"Name" Scaramouche said, you look at him. What did he want? He opens his arm and that's when it hits you. No, he doesn't want a hug. He wants you to change him, there comes the memory of changing a person's cloth practice.

You already know what Scaramouche can do and you don't want it. So you began by opening the button and gently taking out his pants down, after that you go and grab a towel and put it around him. Carefully as to no hurt no, trigger him in the process. You make a mistake here and there but it's your first time so no one can do right?

There. It's all good Scaramouche with nothing but a towel to hide his under. Looking back, did he even have a d-

"Name, come and bath with me"

"What!? No, no...look Kuni I get it that we used to bath together before but now, it's just too awkward"

Right after you finish your words he was already in front of you, that frightened you a little but you already got used to it. Before he kidnapped you he always do that. Scaramouche then grabs your hands and brings you closer to him.

He then began by forcing you to stand still and take out your cloth one by one. I try to stop him you gonna get sho- told you, don't try it, idiot.

After the bath

It's quite fortunate for you to not get hit or anything, you walk behind Scaramouche and you noticed that Mark you left on him still is there, there's guilt inside of you. But that doesn't stop you from hating a little.

After you wear your cloth you began to go and take a comb and help him do his hair, it's really easy once that fluffy hair got wet. While brushing his hair might sound easy, you need to be careful to not hurt him. Trust me bro getting your hair stuck is suck, but having it pulled all over might made me go boom!

After that, you gonna start helping him wear his bedroom clothes, you might notice that he always watching you, and you might think it's cute or just straight-up creepy. You're choice if you ignore the fact that you got kidnapped might help! Or maybe not...

After everything you just gonna go sit on the bed, wait for him to come. After that just imagine what he does to you

[mister-maiden]

Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night. A love letter to metroidvanias

Betcha thought I was gone.

Guess again, Cultists.

From the faint sound of a piano in the background to the delicious plates of meat and apples hidden in the walls, Bloodstained just screamed Castlevania at me and I simply couldn't be more overjoyed. Just..UGHHNN man, this game scratched a certain itch that was lingering on the tailbone of a mildly neglected butt that is my Castlevania pants. And man this just DID it for me.

For starters. The graphics are absolutely stunning in most areas. From your roaring ships on the seas to your books flying from the walls. Nothing ever seemed out of place for its unique animation style. The only game I could really say it reminded me of was Castlevania: Symphony of the night.

It has this gorgeous atmosphere to it of Victorian style that played throughout the game, throwing a twist to every trope it could find. Water areas, fire areas, gearpunk are- you get the shebang. It's a wonderful adventure...however, this could be seen as a bad thing.

Several rooms made me feel like I was just...*going through* them you know? As in there was simply absolutely no substance to it besides having it be a room for a mid-weak level enemy. This made it worse having to go back and farm enemies for certain items and drops...Looking at you Dragon Eggs and Beast Milk...though honestly, this gripe may just be due to my personal tastes. Though this can be easily avoided if you use Johannes the alchemist to destroy certain items for their components...but this is hella expensive.

Speaking of ememies!...um...Well yeah.

Bosses were cool! Well. Some bosses. Half of the bosses made me feel like I was just smashing the attack button and standing in one place while the better bossfights forced me to change my playstyle, spells, hell even my equipment. They did a great job with the bosses that interacted with my own placement, but did a poor job with bosses that could be beaten without even moving.

There are many enemies as well. Several I recognized. The walking grunts that walk at you viciously. The giant that does tons of damage but is easy to read and dodge, the smalll....ANNOYING ENEMIES THAT DO DAMAGE AND ARE IS NIGH EKEHRJ-

The enemies were nicely done. All with their own weaknesses and strengths according to the abilities and weapons you used. A small enemy could be dispatched quickly through a broad stroke of a great sword or a bigger enemy with armor pierced with a spear, ect. I don't have anything good or bad to say about the enemies because they just feel...*alright*. I mean there's just really nothing special to these enemies compared to enemies in other games. They were just there to be there..nothing wrong with that though. The only gripe I had was the lack of diversity in demons. They were just three different stages of the same demons I face in the beginning: Weak, mildly strong/strong, Giant. That tactic of making the player feel like they are progressing felt sort of cheap. A darker enemy of the same model isn't different enemy

What was far more important and interesting was the ABILITIES each monster gave you.

See, through the game, every monster you face has the chance of dropping a shard which bonds to your character's body, giving her several abilities. Ranging from fireballs, bats, and burning acid to shadows, increasing your strength, and more.

You may equip up to four regular spells called conjure shards

A passive shard which passively increases a stat or provides some benefit

A directional shard which allows you to point the spell with your hand via the joystick.

A manipulative shard that manipulates objects and spaces around you.

Skill shards, which gives you passive skills you can turn on and off. These are probably some of the most important shards in the game which are generally found after a boss fight.

My FAVORITE shard: Familiar shard! Allows you to have a familiar along the screen! My favorite being this cool little silver Knight that blocks projectiles c:

Each shard has their own circumstances to be used and best creatures to be used against which is great. Just the rediculous wide range of spells allows the player any range of choice and playstyle. My favorite is flooding the screen with bats. You may upgrade.

Weapons and armor are always in supply. Some found in secret areas while others are only unlocked via finding recipes for the alchemist to make. All have their own merits with some holding special skills you can use on monsters (example: a specific spear or set of spears allows you to sprint forward at rediculous speed). Sometimes I felt like I wasn't doing any damage before realizing I had to move on to the next weapon tier. Sometimes this can workout poorly for games since the progression relies on how well you do damage instead of how skillful you are with how you use your weapon, but I didn't seem to mind at all of Bloodstained's usage of the tiered weapon system.

Now, with over 100 of spell choices and weapons to use against a wide variety of enemies, it can be a hassle to constantly switch between spells and weapons in the menu...which is why the game introduces the quick select wheel!..later...in the game...which was a huge issue for me personally.

The quick select wheel came a bit later in the game which was strange since I had quite the number of spells and weapons I had. A problem I saw immediately with it was that I had to actually unlock more quick select slots by finding them, hidden and scattered through the game. I think this was a poor choice due to how the game encourages the player to play with their setup yet constricts them by locking these slots that didn't need to be locked in the first place. Maybe it was to give more incentive to the player to experiment with their mobility, but I still don't enjoy it. They should have had all options unlocked.

So now that we have combat and art out of the way, I'll talk about the TOWN features.

As in other metroidvanias, we have a homebase like area which holds several quests and people of interest to talk to. A farmer which can be given seeds to grow crops, a nun which gives you fetch quests to find items in the field to say goodbye to the fallen, an older woman whos hunger knows no bounds. Another nun who is a merchant for you and will also buy your leftover shards, and a fellow alchemist who will transmute items into weapons, armor, and whip up a nice plate of food for permanent stat boosts.

The merchant Nun, or Dominique, will sell you potions, alchemy items, and ingredients. Generally these items are...fairly overpriced, but rightfully so so the player doesn't progress too easily. The prices never change too which makes her interactions pretty concrete. It was nice not having to farm for basic items for potions c: so thank you, Dominique.

Then we have Johannes, our resident alchemist which is where a lot of our time is going to be spent.

Johannes takes the items we find from monsters, and puts them to good use my transmutation. He's the man who helps us make our ultima keyblade!..well, stronger weapon. This can be a tad annoying as some enemies take quite some time to farm, but it wasn't a hassle as I could teleport to the room and kill them until I got the item.. honestly this felt...a tad tedious? Then again, not a huge farming fan of repeat killing a monster, but it was needed to get some items.

Johannes also has an option to make you food from the ingredients you find from monsters! (Great idea to cook meat from demons) these meals give you permanent stat boosts after your first bite, but subsequent meals of the same food won't give you anymore bonus stats.

A special interaction is the ability to upgrade your shards! Using items from the monsters you kill (generally the same demon that gave you the shard), you can upgrade your shards to give them a new effect and make them stronger! The shards can be leveled to level 9 and are maxed out from there. This is one of my favorite parts of the game because how ridiculously numerous these spells are in effects. Hell, I can summon a dragon so he can just SMACK the screen like a fly swatter. Nothing makes you feel as powerful as watching a dragon head you summon just spew fire on a defenseless boss.

Now quests. These are...pretty underwhelming and are accomplished simply as you walk along to be honest. You'll finish these without even realize it because of how simple they were. These felt pretty weak in comparison to the rest of the game, but I mean hey, gave me some cool items. These could have been more fleshed out or maybe given the player some better quests that weren't just *fetch this*. Quests were the weakest part of the game.

Story was..uh...well. I'll be honest. My girlfriend even witnessed as I called the plottwists one by one and it was sort of sad. Don't play this game for the story. Truly don't. There isn't a good story here. The story is only here to drive the action and gameplay which is what the developers focused on. The game comes with multiple endings, the true ending being a tad cryptic to get to without knowing a certain secret of what to do with a weapon, but regardless, the story atleast made sense...has just been done before.

Now. Should you buy it?

If you're a fan of metroidvanias...I'd say the price is worth it. About 20-30 hours of gameplay for the avid metroidvania fan..I think (I'll start recording how long it takes me to really finish something hah)

If not a fan: wait for a sale. It's something great to have and pickup. With some gripes about quests and enemies while also having praises for the enhance system and spells, I enjoyed myself. I really did. It was fun. I put it down a couple of times because it was just too much with how large the map felt sometimes, but after getting the hang of mobility and the teleport system, it really felt like a castle to run around in.

-------------------METRIC-------------------

Pros:

• Spell system is EXCELLENT. I wish games had this many spells.

• Combat was nice with weaknesses and different strengths to each setup and creature.

• Map is widely varied.

• Artstyle felt like a callback to Castlevania as well as the music

• Long and worth the pricetag.

• Repayable

•Freakin familiars, man

• Decent amount of weapon choice (even if all do the same weapon attack as a weapon in their same category, each weapon felt like an upgrade.

CONS:

• Reskinned monsters are not good replacements for different monsters. Please don't do that...it feels cheap.

• Story was uninteresting

• The quickslot should be available from the very beginning so I can customize my character. It shouldn't have been a skill.

So that was my review on Bloodstained c: I really enjoyed it after getting used to the controls...also fun tip...USE the backdash. It helps so much in certain boss encounters where every action counts.

Have a nice Sunday, Cultists c:

[stories-tales-myths]

Fairytale: König Drosselbart / King Thrushbeard

A German fairytale that I grew up with. It's supposed to teach a lesson, but it's actually really fucked up.

.characters: Princess [vain], King [her father], suitors [various], King Thrushbeard, Beggar

---

1. Enter beautiful young Princess. [Let's face it, she is a teenager. There are different versions with her age 14-18] King wants to marry her off.

2. King invites suitors [really just an assortment of inbred creepy old guys with titles and money] and because he is soo kind and progressive and loves his daughter soo much, he wants to let her choose who to marry

3. Suitors line up, Princess judges. [It's supposed to feel like that scene from "The Emporers new groove", but Princess actually has some good points] 'You are like four times my age' 'You smell as if you have never taken a bath in your life and I'm supposed to touch you?' 'I think you killed your last wife because she only had daughters. Did I hear that rumor right?' 'You look like a pig.' 'You're drunk.' 'Your parents were siblings and you only want to marry me because you don't have any sisters.' 'You live several weeks away and I don't want to leave my family and home like this:' [Add to your heart's content. Some good points, some shallow points. Seriously. The tale always gets told with shallow and reasonable criticisms, but the audience is always supposed to feel as if all points are shallow. I told you it's creepy. I have never heard a version without at least the age-thing and some reference to alcohol. But SURE, Princess just needs to suck it up. ] and finally: 'You have a funny beard. You look like a thrush. I shall call you King Thrushbeard.'

[This is a thrush. What a cute little birdie.]:

4. Somehow, this pisses the King of. [Maybe he used to sport this style in his youth]

The King throws a tantrum:

'You, my beloved daughter, are an ungrateful brat. You refuse to marry any of these wonderful suitors, these noble noblemen that would actually be perfect for you. And now you make fun of this handsome fella.

Obviously, I [mis]understand you perfectly: You don't want to marry a nobleman, so I guess you don't want to be a princess anymore. And you embarrass me in front of my old friends and drinking buddies, so I guess you don't want to be my daughter either.

You shall get your wish: The next beggar I see shall be your husband. You won't ever see this castle or me ever again.

Now go to your room, I will have a drink or two with these WONDERFUL men.'

5. Princess does not believe her father. Nevertheless, the next morning comes. There is a beggar. The beggar asks for a few coins. Instead, he gets a 14-year-old [or whatever age you picked] child bride [Child, yes. Even if she's 18, he's like twice her age at least] They have a very small wedding and then leave the castle. Princess cries the entire time. [reminder. The story usually gets told with the emphasis that Princess deserves this and is just being an ungrateful brat right now]

6. Beggar and Princess on their journey. Because she is now severely dehydrated, she stops crying. And she fucking scared. [Because her father just GIFTED her to a strange man without her consent and even went so far as to tell her, that whatever happens, she CANNOT come back and ask for his help. And she has no idea where the strange man lives or what he will do to her.

To clarify: The 'noble' suitors would have been pretty bad too. But she would still be a princess and have at least some protection. There would be a court and she would never be completely isolated. There would never be even a risk of her being forced into prostitution or sacrificed to some heathen god or many being eaten alive.

Most of that does not happen, but she can't know that for sure. Just imagine how you would feel in her situation. ]

To distract herself she starts to make light conversation:

"Who does that pretty meadow belong to?"

> "Oh that. It belongs to King Thrushbeard."

"Who does this lush forest belong to?"

> "Oh that. It belongs to King Thrushbeard."

...

[She always asks about something rich or pretty and it always belongs to King Thrushbeard. It's a day-long journey, so just do as many repetitions as you'd like. ]

7. They arrive at a really small, sad little hut.

Princess: "Who does that shabby hut belong to?"

Beggar: "That belongs to me. And because you are my wife now, it's your home as well. I expect you to cook and clean for me and tend to the garden, and I expect you to do well because I don't have time for a lazy wife.

[EWW]

[8. She probably gets raped. This part is never explicit because today's versions of any fairytale for children are rather tame. And the older versions don't NEED to say anything, because they originate in a time when OF COURSE you just casually raped your wife, especially on your wedding night.]

9. Princess has to deal with chores and fails, because of course she does. And Beggar is pissed and yells at her a lot. [He might also hit her.] But at least he is only at home at night, although she has no idea where he goes every day.

Options include

-basket weaving (She has bloody hands after this)

-pottery

-cooking (she doesn't actually fail at this, the soup is just a little bland. Beggar yells at her anyway.)

-cleaning

-laundry (almost drowns in a river)

-selling things at the market (she fails by being run over by a horse in this one.)

10. Beggar is fed up with his permanently 'mopey' [traumatized] and useless 'wife' [underaged slave]. So he sends her away to work at the castle as a kitchen girl.

Nobody recognizes her. [There are several possible reasons as to Why That Is. One worse than the next:

a) King may have ordered everybody to pretend to not know her. Just to make her feel miserable.

b) Princess is now malnourished and possibly sleep-deprived. Possibly her trauma manifests in severe nightmares. She isn't clean, her hair is different, she may have lost weight. Possibly her demeanor has changed too. Gone is the confident and playful girl. This girl speaks quietly, walks quietly and hunched over, and flinches at sudden movements.

c) Princess might be older now. We have no idea how long she lived in the hut with Beggar. A week? A year? Five Years? Who knows?]

11. She is actually relatively happy. She makes friends, learns skills from the other servants (who are actually patient and don't just yell at her). Maybe she gets to say hello to her horse again.

And Princess gets to steal small pieces of the exquisite food her father eats. [don't worry everybody does it] She picks these pieces up and puts them in a small pot under her skirt to eat them later. [Don't ask me about the logistics here. This is one of the big mysteries of my childhood. Why a pot? That must be uncomfortable. How inconspicuous can it be to do this? What if the King eats soup? ]

12. One day, there's a big banquette. King Thrushbeard is there, spots Princess, and says something like 'What a pretty girl. I don't care that she's working right now. My dick says I wanna dance with her, so I'm gonna.'

[In other versions he only notices her because the weird pot shatters and THEN decides to dance with her.]

13. Up-close, Princess realizes something:

King Thrushbeard IS the Beggar

14. King Thrushbeard officially introduces his wife to the world, Princess reconciles with her father. There is a second wedding, big this time.

[In some versions the King knew all along, in other versions he doesn't and just finds this hilarious.

In all versions this counts as a happy ending btw.]

---

Now the lesson here is that girls should always be kind and just do what their dads say. I guess. It's a terrible lesson.

[mandomirtagev]

@kadbejetiise

“Solo! Tell me Dinua is lying through her buc’ye,” Mirta shouted, cupping her gloved hands around her mouth to help her voice carry across the wide swath of waving green-brown grasses between her and the Jedi. “Tell me you didn’t try and cook uj cake for their family! And you didn’t invite me and ba’buir to taste it?”

She probably should have waited until she was closer, or donned the yellow helmet dangling from her hip whose vocabulator could have projected her voice further than she could comfortably yell, but patience was not a Mando virtue and Mirta was too amused to delay. According to Shalk and Briila, Jaina’s cake had come out tasting more like bas neral than anything else -- although admittedly thanks to their mother’s and grandfather’s skills in the kitchen, the children did have quite high standards when it came to uj cake.

“I’m hurt, jetii!” she teased, striding nearer to the short, brown-haired woman with the glowing purple sword. “I thought we were friends!”