#buuuuuuuuuuuuuut. that's like. really really theoretical and i dont trust myself enough to explain bahktin and

[queenofnohr]

On Innuendo and Gawain

Ok so! I sat in on a lower div writing class today where they talked about innuendo and I thought I should make this post because 1. the entire 3 or so hours afterward I freaked out about possible misunderstanding with my Gawain translation and 2. Gawain himself exists in a weird place where his entire character is a sort of innuendo.

Now, for my first point - there seems to be a misconception about innuendo. Innuendos do not have to be sexual, and are not the end-all be-all to interpreting a text. What innuendo is, is nodding to (which, coincidentally, is where it’s actually etymology comes from) or hinting at the possibility of a second meaning in a text. The more catch all term for this exact happening would simply be subtext, with innuendo being a more specific term for clear double entendre (again, double entendres in of themselves are not necessarily indecent).

That being said, Gawain’s Valentine’s event works on innuendo/double entendre/subtext, but that does not mean that it is expressly sexual. However, the way his character is and especially his role in CCC doesn’t mean it’s not there.

In fact, on my first reading I thought it was perfectly innocuous! If you are reading it in that way, the narrative is as follows:

Gawain greets you in the morning, inquires if you’re relaxing on your holiday - you then give him chocolate and he’s pleased with it. However, he can’t express his joy to the fullest because there are other people in Chaldea (with the implication that it would be unbecoming of a knight). He is then troubled because he can’t “reciprocate as much as he’d like” - in this narrative, because you are not a knight and Gawain is kind of oblivious to anything not having to do with knightliness. He then gives himself a pep talk and reasons with himself to treat it as Gareth’s birthday (because she’s his little sister). He then gets you a skincare set to help out because Chaldea is up on a fucking mountain and it’s bad for your skin - a surprisingly considerate gift considering his usual exploits. Of course, as always, he goes a bit too far in his well wishes for your health and growth, overstepping his boundaries in his interest which prompts you to respond that it’s none of his business (the implication being how you grow). He laughs, acknowledging that he knew you’d have an adverse response to the gift, and then going on to say that if he sees your healthy face, it’ll make him hit harder (the phrasing here is still odd), and tells you since he’s your knight he’ll protect you from anything.

Perfectly innocent! But……. here’s the thing. A lot of things are phrased vaguely enough, and perfectly crafted so that if you are reading with such subtext, motivations and such flip flop and read as…… less than innocent. The narrative structure in this case is - 

Gawain greets you in the morning, you give him chocolates. Here’s where it differs - we’re now operating under the assumption that Gawain is taking chocolates to mean something different than simply giving chocolate (aka, as Valentine’s chocolates sometimes (barring girichoco) assume, romantic or even sexual endeavors). Thus he’s overjoyed but….. oh no, he can’t there would be a scandal - but he delights in telling you how he’d sweep you off your feet nonetheless. You, perhaps blushingly, tell him he’s being too much, and he responds telling you that there’s nothing too much about returning deep affection with deep affection of his own. Then he goes on to say he’s troubled because he can’t “reciprocate as much as he’d like” because you aren’t a knight, but a magus. Now, this wouldn’t be so much if the later part of this event didn’t focus so heavily on getting his Master healthy or if the fate series has a long standing tradition of equating magi/magic users with no physical combat skills (it’s always seen as a :o moment when a magi/Caster (or someone who’s supposed to be a proper magi) pulls out their fists and wins). But as it stands, the ambiguity of his statement lends itself to the narrative that you can’t do whatever he was planning because he’d break you (this could literally be anything, not just sex - Gawain is notorious in EXTRA for being disgustingly strong and nigh invulnerable, and even in GO he has a triple buster). Being unable to reciprocate the way he intends, he decides to think of this not as ~Valentines~ but getting his little sister a birthday gift. So he comes back with a pretty innocuous gift, and explains why he got it. Again, it’s pretty courteous considering his personality— but then he gets weird about it. And he gets weird about it no matter which way you read it (which is why you call him out on it) and oversteps his boundaries by concerning himself too deeply with your physical body. In our innocent rendition, this can be attributed to a brotherly or familial sort of concern taken too far for his position. But in this narrative framing, it already has a sexual undercurrent because of what has already happened. Then we get you calling him out for being intrusive, prompting his understanding - and then of course, the weird line of “If you’re healthy, more strength will enter my sword” relating to the conundrum earlier of not being able to fuck you because he’s a strong knight and you’re a frail magus (and of course talk of swords has been used for phallic innuendo for centuries across all walks of life - heian court literature and tokugawa literature had it too). Saying “this body” really isn’t that odd (it happens a lot in various media for emphasis) but after all that it kind of is… (although my weirdness with that line was more of how it was composed with a “to” instead of a “toshite” following “kijo no kishi”) The narrative then ends on a kind of “we can’t do anything……. yet ;)”

But that’s not to say both narratives can’t or don’t exist at once. You don’t have to “choose” a narrative. Both can coexist, with Gawain being perfectly innocuous in his proceedings, but since he’s fucking terrible with people, he gives off weird sex vibes that are just kinda like…….. friend can you not? In fact, that’s perfectly in character for him to not understand how uncomfortable he’s being or the implications he’s putting out. But, it’s also in character for him to be kind of a ridiculous perv, too.

Because, here’s the thing - the moment CCC was released and shed another light on Gawain, the moment his character existed in a dual spectrum, with every single one of his actions being up in the air in regards to intent. The “real” Gawain, all of who Gawain is, exists somewhere in between the “perfect” if assholish knight from EXTRA and his goofy presence in CCC where he’ll comment on literally every single girl’s charm points and say extremely lewd things without batting an eyelash.

So really, the innuendo his Valentine’s scene presents and how deliciously vague it is ties directly into who he is and how he was conceived and packaged to viewers as a character.