#but until today I'd only seen the s2 finales once

[cicadidae-tm9899]

I've binged all of rottmnt in 2 days AGAIN. It's 2 am and i just started the movie and I'm crying already

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

s2 prompt: sometimes mulder goes to scully's in the middle of the night just to check that she's there/safe bc he fears she might've been abducted again

shaking sobbing throwing up he WOULD. my thought process for this literally went Prompt -> a conversation with @fortes-fortuna-iogurtum -> listening to Lucy Dacus Fool's Gold on loop for like three and a half hours btw, in case you wanted to know adjskandksnsj. you probably won't get the full experience unless you listen to that song tbh

all glittering fool's gold

s2 post-One Breath | 2.7k words | rated G | canon compliant-ish? | tagging @today-in-fic | AO3

It's New Year's Eve and Scully is at home, alone. She'd wanted to be, because after a week tired and trapped in a hospital and another three with her mother and Melissa trying very hard and failing even harder not to baby her, she opted out of going to watch fireworks tonight. Anyway, she keeps flinching at the sounds of bottle rockets being shot off that leak in through her windows, keeps flinching every time she looks through the front window, doesn't want to sit there like she used to, because that — that, she can remember.

There's little sparks of color above the skyline, little showers of light that will burn out before they hit the ground. Scully watches the glimmers that she can see with a soft, too-long robe — one of Missy's, maybe — wrapped around her and one hand wrapped around a half-full glass of wine. Usually, she wouldn't stay up until midnight unless she was out with friends or with family; those aren't the kind of traditions she places much stock in. But it's fifteen minutes until the new year, and she is feeling the loss of three months.

Lights, brighter than fireworks and far, far closer, flash through the front window she's been trying to avoid and Scully's entire body tenses up. It's so bright. It only takes her a few seconds to recognize the brightness as a car's headlights, though, and just a few more to recognize whose car it is. She forces her muscles to relax, manages a deep breath and ignores the fluttering of her heart. She's tired but doesn't want to sleep, she's brought this on herself by staying up and by drinking, even if it was only one glass; she can and will rationalize her way out of her own panic.

She tips her head in wonder with no one to see and leaves the rest of her glass of wine in the sink. She double-checks through the peephole, double-checks that her robe is wrapped securely around her, and swings the door open before Mulder can even lift his hand to knock. His eyes go wide, flickering hazel and he stares at her for a long second. This is the first time they've seen each other since she convinced her mom to let her go back to her own apartment.

"Hi," he says quietly, at thirteen minutes until the new year, and she silently lets him in.

"Hi," she says back, watching him sidestep around her while hiding something behind his back. She shuts the door, leans back against it. "What are you doing here?"

Mulder shrugs. "I thought I'd come wish you a happy New Year." He toes off his shoes and she finally notices that he, too, is in much more casual clothing than usual.

The familiar denim shirt he'd let her borrow once when she spilled coffee on her blouse in the car is partially hidden by a leather jacket she doesn't recognize, that he must have gotten while she was gone. Scully blinks at the thought, tips her head again and wants to ask what he's hiding from her, whether by his presence or what he's holding behind him.

"I didn't expect you to still be up, honestly," he admits. "But, on the off chance," he sees her look and shoots her a fireworks-bright smile before holding out a bottle. It's champagne, and not the cheap kind, either. "Happy New Year!"

Scully laughs in surprise that she didn't expect to light her up so much. "I didn't think you'd stay up, either," she says, taking the proffered bottle and pointedly not looking at the price label on the bottom. She doesn't want to know. "Thank you," she adds, a little softer, leads the way to the kitchen and casts a look to make sure he follows.

"Ah, what's the point of an extra holiday if not to stay up late?" He jokes. "Hey, Scully?"

She looks over her shoulder, reaching blindly and familiar to grab two glasses. Everything in her home is exactly as she kept it; she doesn't need to look. She doesn't have champagne flutes, so she pulls down another long-stemmed wine glass and quickly pours out what was left in hers and rinses it. "Yes?"

Mulder watches her with searching eyes, a way she would be annoyed by from anyone else, but she knows it's more out of care than anything else. "How are you doing?" He asks, a little hesitantly, like he knows that she'd yelled at Melissa last week for asking too much. She wonders if they talk about her and hopes they don't. They are the two people in the world who can get to the bottom of her best.

She shrugs, holds the bottle out to him and he takes the hint, pops the cork. "I'm fine," she says, something she's getting very used to repeating. It's true, aside from the way she froze when she saw his headlights through the window and except for how she's trying not to pay too much attention to the gunshot-like sounds of fireworks.

It's nine minutes to the New Year, and Scully hands Mulder a glass and takes her own and doesn't even tense up when she sits near the front window. The pop-pop-pop of pyrotechnics isn't like thunder and lightning, she can't calculate how close it is by time passed. She curls her feet underneath her, tries not to sit closer to Mulder than she has, no matter how glad she is he's here. Maybe she was wrong about being alone on the way into a new year that feels like it's coming too suddenly. Nine minutes, three months; it's more time than it seems like.

She takes a sip of overpriced, gesture-of-affection champagne, and it's warm and fizzly down her throat. Like fireworks, she thinks. "I'm glad you're here," she blurts suddenly, lifting her eyes to his. He'd spent good money on her for no reason and come to check on her on New Year's Eve, when she hadn't even known she needed it.

Mulder barks out a raw little laugh, equal parts joy and desperation. "I'm glad you're here, Scully," he says, grinning at her with circles under his eyes that she didn't notice at first.

He looks worn down, she feels uncertain. There's a little bit of light in both of them, though, and a part of her wants to blame the alcohol. Champagne can intoxicate you faster than beer; she thinks of the fireworks outside, their light illuminating the sky and then flickering out on the way down. She wonders if Mulder understands what she's saying; she is better now that he's here, and that much is not bubbly alcohol.

He looks away after a moment, busies himself with his own glass. Scully studies him for a moment, the sadness and hope in his eyes that's always been there but that's more obvious now, the way his hair sticks up in front — he's clearly gotten a haircut recently, and she wants for just a moment to run a hand through it — how he sits, relaxed but somehow still tightly coiled much the same as she is. The shadows under his eyes, like they've escaped from inside him; she wonders how much she seems the same if he were to look at her this way.

Another sip, like a bubbly sweet swallow of courage, and she puts her hand on his arm. Mulder looks up at her, a little more surprised than he really should be, because they've touched each other so easily and so much until recently. "You look tired," Scully notes, with a hint of a question.

Mulder chuckles, looks at her hand on his wrist like he wants to slide his own hand back and hold it, and maybe she wishes he would. "Insomnia will do that to a person, I hear." He couches it in a joke, but she hears more than that.

When they travel, he's usually asleep before she is, unless it's a particularly compelling case. She can fall asleep practically anywhere, be it a plane or an airport or a rental car, but she's seen him practically melt into hotel beds before. If she were to knock on his door in the night — which she's only done once, when he got a concussion and she needed to check on him — she's more likely to be greeted by a soft snore than anything else. She isn't an insomniac herself, or at least she doesn't think she is, but she's found that he usually rests easily. It was something she noted on their first case, even, when the plane was half full and he stretched out across an entire row of seats and slept for most of the flight.

She frowns, searches over his face for an answer that doesn't require a question and finds none, except for the way he's looking at her. "Mulder, since when do you have trouble sleeping? You've never been an insomniac."

He shakes his head, smiles in a way that she doesn't like because she can tell, deep down, that he's forcing it. He swirls his glass, takes another drink, tops off both of their glasses from the bottle. "Since uh," he mumbles, "Since you were taken." It comes out fast, tumbling past his lips like a confession, and he won't look at her. "I still can't really-" he breaks off, shrugs. When he finally looks at her, it's with sad eyes and a soft smile. "It doesn't matter."

Scully bites back the urge to snap that it does, it does matter, and finds that she's suddenly reeling just a little bit. She knows he'd kept her cross, her mother had said that he'd worn it, and that rocked her hard enough as it is. Mulder, who's never had faith in the things she does and vice versa, wearing the symbol of her faith. Mulder, not sleeping because of what happened to her. It hits her then how much her abduction has affected him, how much he hasn't shown for the sake of putting her first. Maybe the alcohol is making her emotional, maybe it's the ball dropping in her heart at the same time it drops in Times Square, but she wants just a little bit to cry.

"Happy New Year," Mulder whispers, and she glances at the clock and watches the two hands come aligned. The new year has come, far too fast, and she'd nearly missed it. She doesn't feel any different.

Beside her, Mulder downs the last of his champagne. On the other side of her, outside the window, a resounding, crackling rocket goes off, light and sound at the same moment, and she jumps, squeezing her eyes shut against the flash of fear and squeezing the stem of her glass in one hand. Mulder's hand finally meets hers, and she flicks her eyes open, too wide, too irrationally afraid — she doesn't know why the fireworks are setting her off — and he's staring at her with more concern, more gentleness than she knows what to do with.

"I'm okay," she says, carefully so her voice won't shake. "Just startled me. They're not supposed to set those off in residential areas," she adds with a lightness she doesn't feel. Reluctantly, she pulls her hand from his, stands to take both their glasses and finish the rest of hers on the way to the kitchen. She has to turn her back, has to compose herself.

"Since when do people follow those kinds of rules?"

He follows her, of course, into the kitchen while she stands over the sink and drinks the last of her glass of champagne. She's saving the rest of it for the next time she wants that brightness. She wants to laugh, maybe, at the fact that Mulder bought her something so expensive. She wants to cry, maybe, because she doesn't understand why he would do that. She doesn't understand why he's here, even if she is glad of it.

She turns around, faces him once she thinks she can. "Mulder, why... why are you here?" She asks, not sharply, but maybe a little rougher than she means to. She just wants to understand.

His eyes go big again, the way they had when she first let him in, and the expression is endearing. "To... to celebrate," he shrugs. "New Year's, fireworks." He pauses, looks at his feet, looks back at her, eyes tracing over her face and her stature and then back to meet her gaze again. "You're here," he says. "I wanted to check that you're- here, and alright. To... remind myself," he admits.

"To remind both of us," she murmurs under her breath, and she doesn't know if he hears it because he doesn't respond. "Mulder, do you think-" she stops herself, rubs the tip of her nose.

He's watching her, waiting for her to finish her sentence, and she's not sure if it's a good idea, but she doesn't think she's going to sleep well tonight — she's lived here long enough to know the fireworks won't stop until the sun comes up, or maybe longer — and he won't either, he'd just admitted it himself. He doesn't sleep well, anymore, which probably means he doesn't sleep.

She wraps her arms around herself, feeling empty-handed and wanting, more than anything, for the warmth she'd felt with that first sip of champagne again. "Do you think you would sleep better with me?" She finally manages, her voice quiet and questioning.

Mulder visibly stops short, stops breathing, stares at her like she's speaking another language. "What?" He breathes, like he's panicking, like she had a moment ago.

Scully shrugs, leans her head to the side. "I'm going to have trouble sleeping, too," she admits, hiding another flinch and instead glancing toward the glitter falling down in the corner of the window that she can see from here. "You could stay here tonight," she offers, as more aggravatingly, terrifying bottle rockets go off and make her think it's doomsday instead of the dawn of a new year. "That way we... you can know that I'm here."

Mulder stares at her, mouth hanging half open. "Scully, you... really?"

She nods, because it's all she can do and if she tries to talk again, she's either going to start giggling or start crying. There's something borderline ridiculous about all of this, something that would be comedic, would be unimaginable with anyone but the two of them. She doesn't want to ask, doesn't want to make it for her sake even though it already is, but she hopes he understands. Barely over a month ago she was presumed dead, then almost dead. Fireworks are newly terrifying and bubbly white wine is possibly the best thing she's felt since waking up.

"Okay," he says, eyes full of something that might be exhaustion, might be longing, might be hope.

She checks the lock on the door again, glances at the lock on the front window — but then, what did that ever matter anyway? — and feels as if she's letting go of something she's had in a chokehold, or maybe it's letting go of her. She looks at Mulder, studying her like she'd been studying him, like she's a mystery he can't unravel; like she's one of his x-files, and she is now, isn't she?

The couch is soft when she sinks into it, in a way she hasn't noticed until now, and Mulder's eyes are even softer. There's a fleeting moment when a small, quiet part of her wants to kiss him, but mostly, she just wants to be near him. Another burst of fireworks resounds outside and she flinches again, feels her pulse pick up for a few beats, and she glimpses just for a second the look in Mulder's eyes as he watches her. She doesn't like seeing the pain in him any more than he likes seeing it in her.

In the morning, she'll blame the alcohol, or the fireworks or full moon. She'll blame her own human need, or the forces that did this to her, or the fall of man, but right now she is coming up empty-handed, and there's something warm fizzing in her chest when she closes her eyes and tucks herself against Mulder and he puts his arms around her.

"I've got you," he whispers against the top of her head, and she huffs a warm, sleepy chuckle.

"Yeah," she replies, feeling the knot in her gut start to unclench. "Mulder."

"Scully?"

"I'm here."

Outside, fireworks light up the skyline, a fizzy kind of fool's gold.

[stayarmytinyzenmoa-l]

Prominence [WCh. 2.2]

Social Media AU ; Idol AU ; Added Unit AU CW/TW: Language Genre: Comedy, Romance Pairing: NCT x Idol!Reader, Seonghwa x Reader Y/N Pronouns: Female (She/Her) Word Count: 3.6K

(2/80) [First] | [Previous] | [Next] [NCT Masterlist] | [Other Groups Masterlist] | [Prominence S1 Masterlist] | [Prominence S2 Masterlist]

Notes: Didn't think I'd get to this guy so soon, did you? Also the [Prominence poll] is still up if you're curious hehe Disclaimer: Please remember that this is an AU and a work of fiction, obviously the idols mentioned/written about in this story would never partake in these actions. The idols mentioned in this work are meant to be seen more as face claims rather than the actual idols themselves.

Feedback is greatly appreciated!! Thank you for reading!

Today is January 12. It's January 12 and Seonghwa only has today to make things right with you before he leaves.

"Seonghwa, are you listening?" His manager says with a curt voice. "You need to figure out what's going on with you and (Y/N) now. The company's been on my ass about you two. The PR team needs to know because rumors are already spreading. We either confirm your breakup or we post something to deny it."

"I know, I just..."

"It's hard, I understand. Dating's a messed up thing, I get it, but listen. You're both idols, you need to be transparent about this if you want to avoid a scandal or some blown up rumors about how you cheated on her or she cheated on you, do you know what I mean? You fix this now so both you and her can avoid the headache that can come from this," his manager's words, although stern, held some sympathy in them.

"How do I even do that? Does she even want to see me? She blocked me back." Who knew that when he finally opened his messages after unblocking you, and seeing the masses of texts that had piled up from you over the past three days, he would instead see something that absolutely destroyed him. And to make the whole situation worse, he couldn't contact you at all. You weren't picking up his calls or answering his texts, it was like you had a whole new number altogether. All of his messages didn't even go through, all of the explanations and the pleas, as he scrolled through them even he thought they looked pathetic.

"Well, do what you two did best. Communicate," his manager ended the conversation by walking out first.

Communicate. Right. You were both so good at that until this point but... those recordings that Juliet had. He wanted to tell you about them first at least. He needed to come clean to you about that. But how could he do that if you blocked him?!

And he didn't blame you, he couldn't.

After all, he blocked you first.

But now? He's going to set things right with you, he had to. It was the least he could do for you. And if you didn't accept his apology? So be it, that's your choice and he understands that. But if you gave him a second chance? Even better. He just didn't want things to end with you on as horrible a note as it seemed. If only he didn't take Juliet on that offer, he should've thought it through first, no... He should've told you first. He should've explained everything to you before going through with everything.

But he didn't.

~

The first thing Seonghwa did was walk into the Police Station.

"Hello, how can we help you?" The woman at the front desk asked, but once she looked up a small gasp left her mouth. "Oh, oh my, you're-"

"Park Seonghwa, hello there," he nods his head with a smile. "Is there any way I can get an officer to escort me to a restaurant tonight?"

"I'm sorry?"

"I have reason to suspect someone's unlawfully stalking myself and my partner," Seonghwa says. "And I'd like for that to end tonight."

"I, uh, I'll see what I can do, I suppose. Has this person done anything to you specifically? Unless there's proof of physical assault or property damages, we can't do much about a stalker, unfortunately," she scrambles to grab the phone regardless. But, with her phone against her ear, Seonghwa only nodded.

"I don't have the proof on me, but if she did something in front of an officer that's arrest-worthy, would that count?"

"Um... I suppose it would, but it would be incredibly hard to have one of our officers follow you for the night," she shakes her head, still waiting for the call to connect. "But we'll see what we can do. Do you have any names or locations?"

"Yes. First name Juliet and Family name Park. Location will be the Silver Spoon across the ways from the SM Ent. building."

"Juliet? That's a Western name, no? Does she have a-"

"Not to my knowledge, no," Seonghwa looks at the time. "I'm sorry, I really have to go. I need to end this quickly so I can go back and apologize to someone."

"Oh! Okay, like I said, I'll see what we can do, Mr. Park," the receptionist tries to call again.

"Thank you, again I'm sorry for not following proper procedure on this whole thing, it's just an emergency and, you know..."

"It's quite alright, we get a lot of these from other idols as well so we're well equipped," she says.

"Thank you, thank you, and happy new year's!" Seonghwa smiles and is quick to rush out of the station. Okay, even if he couldn't get Juliet detained tonight, at least they could set up a full-on investigation if anything. Maybe. He didn't actually know how this stuff worked and he didn't have much time to research it.

Step one, end things with Juliet. Step two, apologize to you.

Easier said than done, granted.

When he arrived at that restaurant, the one right next to your aunt's, he wasn't surprised to see Juliet sitting there already. With her phone on the table and her head nestled on top of the back of her hands, he could tell that she's been waiting. He didn't grace her with formalities as he sat down and placed the two items on the table. The waiter, meanwhile, stood next to their table and filled his glass with what looked to be white wine, then he was gone as fast as he arrived. Her eyes shifted down to the velvet box and then to him.

"That for her?" She asks as she takes the box in her hands and opens it. Seonghwa had to hold himself back right then and there to take it back. He couldn't do anything that could make this situation even worse than it already was. She takes the ring out. "Last I checked, (Y/N) wasn't one for diamonds."

"Luckily for me, your opinion means nothing."

"Ouch," she takes the ring out and slips it onto her own finger. "Would you look at that? A perfect fit."

"Take it off," Seonghwa's glance narrowed and Juliet just shrugged. Seonghwa rolled his eyes and then he caught it. Maybe it was just him, just him seeing things at the corner of his eyes, but, for a brief moment, he could've sworn that he saw you standing outside. But that was impossible, no, you should be at Doyoung's party right now, no? That's what Yeseul had told him at least. But he couldn't shake off that feeling. When Juliet slipped the ring off and placed it back in the box, she placed it in the middle of the table again. "Leave us alone. I've already reported you to the authorities and it's only a matter of time before an open investigation starts on you."

"That's if they find proof," she scoffs. Seonghwa glances down at his phone. He opens his messages and, immediately, his blood ran cold. He looked at the message sent that morning, one he had written in such a state of distraught that he didn't realize how horrible it sounded. And what made it worst? The person he sent it to. He stood up in a flash, his seat knocking behind him and before Juliet could say anything Seonghwa grabbed the velvet box and rushed out of the restaurant, he looked both ways before running toward the company building, and that's when he saw you.

Yangyang was holding you close to him, and the two made eye contact. Yangyang only shook his head and Seonghwa understood. He understood but he couldn't find it in himself to leave. Then, as the fireworks lit up the sky and you pulled away, Seonghwa saw it. You were so enamored with the night sky that you couldn't even tell how lovestruck the boy next to you was. Again, Yangyang looked to Seonghwa and he knew.

He screwed up big time. He doesn't even know if he could fix this. And when you looked at Yangyang? Seonghwa felt his heart break. What did he do? Then, you were gone. Seonghwa looked at his phone again. There was no fixing this, it was over for both of you.

It was over.

~

Fuck it, he only had today before their world tour started, he had to make things right with you now. He was about to head out of the company building before he was interrupted.

"No way! Park Seonghwa!" A familiar voice prompted the idol to turn his head around and an old school friend of his waved his hand at such a fast speed that he could barely see it. Great, of course now that he's in a rush he had to be stopped.

"Oh! Kyungjae!" Seonghwa rose his hand in greeting and his previous junior finally caught up to him. No one knew yet. No one knew, and he had to keep up images. Plus, Kyungjae was a good friend of his way back when and to see him now was shocking. Talk about a small world, he didn't think he'd run into anyone from his school days but looks like he was wrong.

"Holy, wow, it's been forever, you look great! I almost didn't recognize you, hyung," he smiles and holds his hand up. Seonghwa high fives it and Kyungjae smiles. Last he saw the younger man was when he couldn't even look at a girl before becoming a nervous wreck, but looks like he really improved on his appearances. He held himself more confidently, that much was certain. If Seonghwa wasn't in such a rush, he would've genuinely taken his Junior out for lunch to get caught up.

"It has been a while, speaking of, why are you here? If you don't mind me asking! It's nice to see you too, I'm just wondering why you're at the company specifically," Seonghwa blinks, trying his best to stay polite despite the rush he was in. He glances at the time on his watch while he waits for Kyungjae to answer.

"Oh! I applied for a staff position here," he says.

"Did you? That's wonderful, you got a callback?"

"I did!"

"I guess that means you're going on tour with us, right?"

"Oh, no. I'm here to decline it."

"... Huh?!"

"I got offered a better position at a different company, so I'm here to rescind my application," Kyungjae rubs the back of his head awkwardly. "Well, you look like you're in a rush, so I'll talk to you later! Good luck on your tour, hyung!" Kyungjae walked off first and Seonghwa waved goodbye, continuing on his way to the NCT dorms.

The ride couldn't have been any longer, and he was practically flying on his feet when he dashed into the dorm building, nodding his head towards the security guard as he jumped into the elevator and pressed the button for the highest floor. He could feel his heart thrum in his chest as the floors ascended and, finally, they stopped. The doors opened and Seonghwa stepped out, his hand hovering over the front door. He knocked on it harshly, when there was no response, he did it again. Still, nothing. Right as he was about to knock once more, it opened and Johnny glared at him.

"Nope. No way. Out. Leave. You're not welcome here anymore," Johnny shook his head and pointed toward the elevator.

"I just need to talk to her."

"Nope. You had days to do it and you sat on your ass while she locked herself in her room, and now you have the audacity to show up here and-" Seonghwa pushed past Johnny and started to make his way toward the ANiMA side and Jeno sighed on the couch. He stood up and blocked Seonghwa's way.

"Drop it, Seonghwa. It's not worth it," Jeno held his hand up. "You can't expect to just barge in here and get what you want," he says. "Leave before you make a scene, okay? Just be glad it's only me and Johnny here and not Jihyun or Yuta," he tried to bargain.

"I only have today, I have to talk to her," Seonghwa insists. Jeno had worry in his eyes as he looks to Johnny. Then, the door opened behind Jeno and Mars bounded out.

"Johnny, can you watch Mars for me while I go with-" You stopped talking as soon as you saw him.

And, just like that, Seonghwa felt his heart break all over again. And, maybe he was just imagining it, but he could see it in your eyes too. Just one look substituted a whole conversation, and the weight of everything he'd done to this point just seemed all the more heavier. Suddenly, Mars bit Seonghwa, as if to reprimand him for hurting you so much and Seonghwa, as much as he wanted to apologize, knew that a dog couldn’t understand the situation at all. Yet Mars seemed to growl at him as if he truly knew the gravity of it all.

"What the...? Mars, down!" Seonghwa commands. Mars only responded by biting down harder and Seonghwa tugged his hand out of his jaw and shook the pain off.

"Mars!" You stepped into the room and called him back to your side. "Why would you do that? No biting," you scolded him and, althought Mars whimpered for a moment, he turned and stood protectively in front of you. Seonghwa took a step towards you and Mars barked, snarling at the person who was once his father. The door opposite opened and Yangyang walked out.

"(Y/N), turns out we're not actually allowed to leave the dorms so, uh, change of plans, I hope you like Jenga," Yangyang spoke aimlessly until Mars dashed from his spot to him, nudging Yangyang toward the scene.

"Yeah, that's fine... I'm going back inside," you were quick to retreat back into the ANiMA side and just as Seonghwa made a move to follow you, Jeno placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Want to see how that one ends?" He quirks an eyebrow and Johnny opens the front door again.

"Just, uh, just go, Seonghwa," Yangyang pets Mars and the dog growls in Seonghwa's direction. "You're making it worse."

"I just need to explain what happened, I know it's late, but she deserves to know-"

"To know why you've been cheating on her?!" Yangyang shouts. At this, even Johnny was shocked. It was a rare sight to see Yangyang raise his voice at all.

"Cheating? (Y/N) didn't tell us about that one," Jeno stepped back, standing with shoulders squared and glance narrowed.

"What?! I would never... What are you talking about? How dare you accuse me-"

"Oh, if that was a misunderstanding, then what about treating her like a fucking object? You can have her? Have? Are you kidding me?" Yangyang threw his hands out in exaggerated movements. Now Johnny was leaning against the wall, not out of amusement, but in some way to seemingly hold back. "And now you barge in here trying to act like a goody-two-shoes boyfriend expecting her to just listen to you after the stunt you pulled on New Year's? And not only that, you think you can just act like everything's okay after blocking her for no reason when you're the one who broke up with her over a damn phone call?" Yangyang snapped. "No. Fuck that. Get out of here," Yangyang points toward the door and Seonghwa stood at a loss for words. "Clearly, she doesn't want to talk to you right now. I don't know what you did to deserve her in the first place but after you treated her like that you just stooped to the lowest of the low-" Yangyang stopped talking once his phone started ringing in his back pocket. He took it out and read the contact name. It just took a glance from Seonghwa to know it was you. Yangyang glared at him before answering it. "Yeah?" His voice was noticeably quieter. "But- What do you mean drop it? No! What the hell? He treated you like shit why would I... fine! Okay, fine..." he hands Seonghwa his phone.

"(Y/N)," Seonghwa said your name as soon as the phone was against his ear. "Let me explain, please. What you saw at that restaurant isn't what you think, let's talk. You and I, please. Alone," he glanced at the three people in the main room.

"I don't want to." The waver in your voice broke him.

"It's all one big misunderstanding. Just let me in so I can explain-"

"I don't know if I can even trust you anymore, Seonghwa. What more secrets are you keeping from me, huh? How long have you two known each other?"

"I don't think 'known' is the right word to use."

"Well, I don't care, I don't care about you anymore. You just go and be happy with fucking Juliet and her pretty diamond ring and go live the best life you can because I don't want anything to do with it!" He could hear your shout from the other side of the door. If his heart could break any more than it already was, then that certainly did the trick. And the worst part? He couldn't blame you, at all. "You're horrible. Horrible. I trusted you with everything and you didn't trust me at all. I don't want to talk to you or see you right now. Just leave. Please."

"(Y/N). It's a big misunderstanding, the ring wasn't meant for that..."

"Just go!" Again, your shout was clear from the other side of the door and, when Mars growled at him again, Seonghwa knew he only had one option. "Just... go, okay? You're making this harder than it already is."

"But it doesn't have to be."

"Just go on your tour, or whatever. I know that's why you're here, you couldn't do a tour knowing that you fucked up so now you're here for yourself. Either that or the company forced you to come here yourself, you didn't make that choice, I know that. We're done. I can't be in this relationship if you're not going to trust me, and I can't go into this relationship if I can't trust you. Okay? Just... go, please."

"We can-"

"We can't! And even if we could, I don't want to right now. I don't have the time to worry about this and I don't have the patience anymore. You hurt me beyond words and I still can't believe you did it and nothing you say can change the fact that it happened. So go. Go while I'm still being nice."

"(Y/N)."

"Don't." You hung up the phone and Seonghwa put it down on the coffee table. If it wasn't your final words that got him to leave, it was the glares from the others in the room that prompted him to turn around and make his way back to the door, and it was Johnny to shut it behind him with a clear "And stay out!"

There really was no fixing this, was there? And the missed calls from Hongjoong were enough to prove the severity of this situation. With one last glance back at the door, he stepped back into the elevator. He knocked his head against the back of it and he answered his phone.

"Where are you? We've been looking all over for you!" Hongjoong's voice was frantic.

"It's over, Hongjoong. For good," was all Seonghwa could say. "There's no hope, she won't even listen to me."

"Geez, I don't blame her."

"Hongjoong!"

"What? Want me to lie? (Y/N) isn't someone to just bend over and accept apologies, you know that better than I do. If what I heard from Saeron is right, then she's more than just heartbroken, she's betrayed."

"What did Saeron tell you?"

"She said she saw you give a ring to Juliet. What was that?"

"What? I didn't give Juliet anything..." Seonghwa's voice trailed when he realized what Hongjoong meant by it. "Oh my god, she saw that?"

"Apparently. Hyung, just come back for now. We'll deal with this after the tour when you've both had some time off to think about things," Hongjoong says.

"Yeah, I'm on my way back now," Seonghwa says as the elevator slides open. "Hongjoong, give me an hour."

"No! Absolutely not! Come back here, you're going to make the situation worse!"

"Sir, we've just gotten notice to not allow you in the building anymore," the security guard stands in front of Seonghwa and he takes a deep breath.

"Of course you did, don't worry, I'm on my way out," he hangs up the phone and walks out of the dorm building.

He's going to fix this, he has to, somehow... once he comes back from his tour, he will. His phone rang again, only this time, it wasn't someone as kindly as Hongjoong.

"Hello?" He answered it.

"Seonghwa, the company's hard-pressing this, they want it resolved before take off. Did you and (Y/N) talk it out?" His manager's voice was frantic.

"Not really, no."

"What do you mean?"

"We're through. I don't think we'll be getting back together any time soon, either."

"I'm so sorry, Seonghwa. Do you want to announce it yourself?"

"I..." he did. "I can't."

"I understand, I'll tell the company." His manager hung up. Not even five minutes later, the group chat was blowing up. He didn't have to read the messages to know that it had been done. The fact that it happened so quickly just told him that the company had just been waiting on his go-ahead, who knew how long they had the article in their drafts until he finally admitted it to himself.

Seonghwa's phone was in his hands as he scrolled through all the replies and quote retweets on the [official post]. Official. Right. It's over and done with for real now. The company had told him to either figure it out with you or announce the breakup before their tour started and, well, here he was, reading his company's statement on the whole thing. He couldn't even do it himself, part of him still felt like the whole thing was simply just a horrid nightmare. A nightmare, that's what this all was.

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[starship-imzadi]

S2 E1 The Child

Ooo, check out Worf's new baldric (and shirt and forehead) and RIKER'S BEARD!!! And Geordi got a promotion.

Riker maneuver.

I got so used to Frakes clean shaven it's odd to see the beard. Don't get me wrong, I like the beard, a lot. It's a very important part of TNG finding it's style. A lot of people credit his beard as signifying the solidification of TNG creatively. I think it's a very important step but I would disagree and argue that the series doesn't really settle in until season 3.

It's like Tinker Bell...crossed with immaculate conception? Or rape...

Riker's beard is a little fuller than it usually is. It has some "nautical" fine-tuning yet to go.

Ah yes, Pulaski. I really don't like her. She's one of the reasons I don't think the series settles until season 3.

This addition of 10 forward (Guinan) and it's retroactive continuity is odd. But I suppose unlike Riker's beard a new room can't just be added to a ship.

It is odd how Deanna responds in this scene. Before the meeting has even begun she sits at the conference table separate from everyone else and is barely responsive. These are her friends and she can't even look at them. Then when Picard announces her pregnancy he initially skips over the entire reason that it's ships business and not just a personal concern.

I've seen some comparison of this discussion as an issues of pro-choice and I would be inclined to agree but I have a few other issues too. One problem I have is this is set up so Troi does not initially advocate for herself. Pulaski and Picard are the ones who present the pregnancy and Troi has physically positioned herself to be removed from the conversation. It's not even made clear what she's feeling. Her response could be anger or it could be determination. Obviously the initial concern is for everyone's safety and once Troi actually speaks up they immediately respect her decision. But from there the show don't address the very problematic issue that Troi wasn't given an option for consent for the initiation of this pregnancy. She hasn't (exactly) been sexually assulted but she has still been violated. This is the second Troi focused episode (after Haven), and the way she as a character is being used is not okay.

I can see Riker's response being interpreted two different ways. He asks who the father is and it's either in the same vein of jealousy and difficulty in letting Troi go as "Haven" or he and Troi are good friends and he's hurt that she didn't share such an important part of her life. (It's not clear at this stage how close they are as friends. In season 6 "Man of the People" Riker says he's closer to Deanna than he's ever been to anyone, but that's a ways away). Neither is a very compassionate response, they're both self-centered, and they're both ignorant of her clear emotional distress.

I love when Wesley turns to look at Troi, and Riker just stares at him before pointedly ordering him to standard orbit.

Data's fascination and wonder at birth are very endearing. He starts to smile when Deanna approves of his presence during delivery. Data's questions do bring up some interesting thoughts on telepathy and babies...

I've seen a fair amount of commentary that I'd like to echo here about some fairly progressive aspects of this episode. Specifically have a man present in the delivery room. Even by the late 80's this was a very progressive and new option for men. A few decades before and this would have been unheard of. Not only that but there is no father, Data is present and a friend. Perhaps the fact that Data is present, and not a man in a true sense, makes this more acceptable. Either way, this this is definitely an episode that does better when viewed in its time, and without more resent "sensibilities" imposed on it for judgment.

(with that said It's the 24th century and the best they can manage is stirrups.... I'm just not okay with that.)

Okay, so Riker. The first scene around the conference table he's selfish, the scene in the bridge he's protective, and then this scene he's very affectionate, supportive, and caring. He seems to genuinely care for her but hangs back so as to not intrude. What is odd is that Deanna doesn't know he's there. Given her empathic abilities (and connection with Riker) surely she would feel how close he was, and what he felt, if only vaguely. Granted there are other things to preoccupy her focus but we still don't, and never really, understand what their connection, their imzadi bond, affords them.

I've seen the interpretation that Deanna didn't want Will there based on the fact that she asked Data to be there. However, she responded positively to seeing Will and Data's presence at this birth seems to be just based around circumstance: he was there, he was available. For Riker's part he may not feel entitled to be there, and Deanna may not feel like she can ask that of him. Ultimately, there's a lot of room for different interpretation because their relationship is so undefined. We know nothing other than that they are ex lovers who still have [unknown] emotions for each other.

I just noticed Pulaski wears a different uniform from Crusher. Pulaski's is a sort of short dress but it's not like the tight short-sleeved little skirt things you can see women (and a few men early on) wear in the background. And she has trousers/leggings.

Pulaski is a prejudiced b****. It's clearly intentional. I don't know why she was a necessary addition to this crew. (I went on a small rant about her being racist for my Encounter at Farpoint post) Where was all of the "holier than thou" enlightened BS when her character was designed?

So, there's a litter of puppies in the nursery, but just for today. Where did they come from? Picard may not have played with puppies but it's worth seeing Patrick Stewart with one (and maybe he got Number One as a puppy)

Okay, back on track now:

The exterior close up shot of the outside of the ship panning into 10 forward is very unusual; there aren't typically close up shots of the outside of the ship. There have been a few but they're rare.

It looks like Wil grew a bit between seasons.

Majel isn't the computer. Why? (At some point I think she is all of the computer, right?)

Amazing performance from Marina.

I love this gif set, I think it really sums up the episode:

I want to see Worf tuck Wesley in. And look at the smile from Riker. I think Riker has finally, and almost entirely, loosened up. Space dads!

Engage.