#but the fujo in me doesn't sit right with having canon ships

[thepopesbastard]

and that's a wrap folks!! four seasons of good girls down the drain, completely out of my system, and definitely back to business as usual <- me when i'm lying

[einfalls-los]

I am not okay.

Listen, I don't usually get emotional over anime, especially not wacky anime like sk8 (that is not an insult, btw, I love sk8 for what it is). Maybe it's because I had a very emotional and exhausting 2021 so far but sk8 has quite literally been my comfort anime this whole year. And I expected it to get a little angsty like most sports anime. But I was not ready for the gut punch that was episode 9.

So I'm gonna rant about / process the whole thing under the cut (so spoilers, obv). Also, I'm using this as a scream-into-the-void kinda thing but feel free to comment your thoughts if you have any.

Alright first things first - I don't really care for renga. I do think they're super cute and I want to see them together and happy but over the last few years I get less and less drawn towards ships involving high schoolers. It's probably only natural, the farther I get from my school days the least interesting high school romances are getting. Therefore I don't have a lot of thoughts on them this episode. But their moment on the track was just so sweet? And so gay??

To get it out of the way: I hate Joe's skating style.

I wasn't really into the race between Joe and Langa, it felt like something they had to get out of the way to let the plot progress (and get to the Cherry/Adam race already).

I actually really like the route they seem to go with reki. It was set up as that trope of someone realising they're better suited for the support team instead of going to the front lines because they're surrounded by prodigies and while pretty good just not ... well, a genius. We saw it in how amazing the boards he makes are, we even got the "inspirational interview he by chance sees on tv". But this episode he clearly states - no, he does not want that. He wants to skate! Not being a genius be damned! And I think that's really neat iff they continue this correctly. I can see this going multiple ways - him achieving what he wants through hard work and not talent. Or even him not getting as amazing as the others AND THAT'S OKAY. Because that's not the important part, the important part isn't skill but fun.

Now about the big fish - the whole Kojiro/Kaoru/Ainosuke backstory and the Cherry vs. Adam race. Okay, let's see if I can organize my thoughts enough to form coherent sentences.

I am not used to canon lgbt characters in anime. I tend to not like most bl series because of their stereotypes and a lot of them have issues with portayal of consent and outside of those gay characters are so so rare. There are a few examples of course but it's pretty much always subtext.

Now, I know what we got here was also hardly more than subtext but hear me out. I was fully ready to read anything gay happening in this series as fujo fanservice and go on with my life. I had fun ready matcha blossom fics and scrolling through the tag but I expected literally nothing to come out of this. I was super surprised by the "Langa confessing to his mom" scene last week but was still prepared for it to be ignored or to be told "in a bff kinda way" later.

But somehow it feels like this episode crossed a boundary. I can't define why. But it feels too much to be fanservice-y anymore. When at the same time it still isn't canon. Not in an explicit way like I want.

Also, funfact - there is a post sitting in my drafts from last week. I didn't post it because I got distracted by other stuff but it said (paraphrased): a little angst-y headcanon but what if kaoru was actually in love with adam in the past. That's why he is so obsessed with skating against him. And him and kojiro are either already a couple and kojiro is worried he isn't over adam or ko is pining for him and doesn't think kaoru is reciprocating his feelings (and is right about it???). --- and this is pretty much literally what happened this episode???? I don't know how to process that, how am I supposed to feel about that?

And last but not least: For a long long time I haven't hated an antagonist in the way I hate Adam. I was already iffy about him in past episodes but more in a "oh look at this creep ha ha" kinda way. I hate his aesthetic and his whole drama schtick and I am super creeped out by the way he treats langa. And when we got a bit of his backstory last episode I was like - I get it. I will not forgive his actions, I still want to see him in jail but I get it. But again, I feel like he has crossed a line this episode. This may be a very personal line for me but I just got so genuinely angry at him and I don't know what to do with this emotion. Especially since I am about 90% sure adam won't have to answer for his actions in the way I want him to. I am just so disgusted and angry with his character and his actions and knowing it will not be handled like I want it in-universe.

I don't want Langa or Reki to skate against him I don't want to give him the satisfaction and I want those kids as far away from him as they possibly can be. I want Kaoru and / or Kojiro to deck him in the fucking face, I want him to know this is not fucking okay, I want him to suffer and rot in jail without ever touching a skateboard again. (And if he has to lose a race I still want it to be against cherry as my baby deserves.) And I want matcha blossom happy in each others arms, kaoru healing from his feelings and disappointment in adam. I want everyone to be as happy as possible except for fucking adam. FUCK.