#but strangely enough she wasn't awake at 5am. so i just sent the message after i woke up for real
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Running off of two-ish hours of sleep and two bottles of coffee. I'm doing about as well as you'd expect.
#last night i was incredibly busy with end of year camp stuff#i didn't get to sleep until about 5:30#i wake up at 7:20. i usually nap longer than that#i knew this would happen so i bought bottles of coffee to sustain me#i chugged one before i started teaching today and then sipped the other while i taught#i don't feel alive right now. i feel like the coffee in my veins is the only thing animating me#i don't have a single thought in my head except 'fuck I'm tired'#idk how i managed to teach this morning tbh. i think it's only because this is my second year doing it so i know it well#but there were moments i looked down at my lesson plans and didn't know how to read#blessedly i don't think anyone is taking my afternoon class so i can just bum and be sleepy in peace#last night while i was doing my stuff i was also writing a fucking novel to my girlfriend (i have a girlfriend now!!)#just all of my thoughts while i was going through the night because i wanted to be talking to her#but strangely enough she wasn't awake at 5am. so i just sent the message after i woke up for real#it is over a full screen length long and i took parts out before i sent it. but it was also written over the course of like seven hours#I'm exhausted and my mental illness is flourishing in the exhaustion. I'm not a fan#I'm glad i had the experience of last night. but i wish i had experienced a bit more sleep
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