#but rip vash lmao it's ok he'll help

[millionsnife]

Vash isn't wrong; Mona and everyone else currently in his life don't really expect him to change all that much. And it helps. Makes it easier to resort to violence first less often.

Knives listens for a long moment, studies the veritable storm and the request. Curls around Vash like a warm blanket and bats away all the thoughts swarming as he hums faintly, an old melody he rarely allows himself to hear. Offers full faith that he won't be needed for that, but agreeing all the same; it isn't a hard thing to agree to and if it makes Vash feel better and more confident to know that there's someone who can stop him if things go wrong then he can do that.

You're small, I can sit on you until we fix it if that happens.

He flicks Vash gently, more a feeling-concept in the space than a physical action as he ruffles his hair lightly.

Tell me when I'm not understanding things the way I should from now on. It's difficult for me to interpret correctly, when it's just words. And if you don't understand what I'm saying.

You have hurt me. I don't think you understood how... but I'm not scared of that. You won't have the same intentions.

Because his life is a constantly cycle of being hurt. It's his baseline, he's used to it, and Vash knows the difference between someone hurting him with malicious intent, and all the other kinds of hurt. He trusts that Knives won't fall into the former category; that trust ebbs and pulses from him like the slow, steady beat of his heart.

And maybe you could learn to be soft if you wanted. It would take a while... and people care for you without forcing that change on you, right?

He has a significant other. He has children. He has... well, a collection of others he might consider friends, as well as his own twin flesh and blood Vash (even if they have their own... issues), despite this self-loathing and violent way of showing how he cares. People still love and care for him.

I do. You're a menace, but it wouldn't be you if you weren't.

... but that softness, that warmth and care and appreciation eventually... cracks. He... can be open here, can't he? He can be honest, Knives understand better here, he said that--

I just don't want this to be like last time. I can't hurt them again. I can't I can't I can't

--but even if that weren't the case, Vash can't hide it as well, here, as hard as he tries. It sounds like a veritable storm of worms, endlessly buzzing and loud, drowning out anything and everything as dread claws for him, digging the tips of it's talons into the core of his being.

if I turn into something unrecognizable if I try to hurt you them if it happens can you stop me will you stop me please please please