#but like . my brain still terrorizes me w the thought that i'm unlovable as fuck .
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nnnnnnnnno i'm crying to love songs again fuck
#âž³ valentin vents#ig.#UGHHHHHHHHH#i just wanna be in love again man#it feels so unfair that i've never had anything purely good . or . mostly good . but again i guess that in itself explains why i'm currentl#single lmao . but still man . it's so fucking hard for me to actually catch feels and then when i do it's either one sided or i end up in a#situation where ''loved'' is the furthest thing i feel#and now i just . i want to be close to someone . i don't even care if it's romantically at this point i just want to have *someone* who is#consistently there and who i can be affectionate towards and who is affectionate towards me#and i'm doubting if i'll eeeeeeeeeever get married which is like . horrifying to me . but it's silly asf to panic about that bc i could#literally meet someone tomorrow and end up marrying them in 10-20yrs or however long#but like . my brain still terrorizes me w the thought that i'm unlovable as fuck .#because everyone i know has dated wayyy more than i have#and isn't this obsessive over the idea of being in love#three cheers for being hyper.romantic this is fun (sarcasm) (living like this is fucking hell)#am i not pretty enough likeee#i'm smart! i do my best to be kind and empathetic! everyone says i'm sooo pretty and smart and amazing but#.....haha . where's the uhh . yknow . like . results from that . aha .#i barely have any friends and have never dated someone irl#i feel so insignificant and i swear if i poofed one day it'd take like a month for everyone i know online to move on#sooo like . who do i have . where's the proof i'm such a great person . ahaha . like . iffff i'm such a great person . why doesn't everyone#flock to me to be my friend . why have i never been asked out . i'm always the person to confess . why does literally nobody seem to care#about me in any substantial way (aside from my family but you can't compare that to having other friends or a romantic partner obviously???
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