#but it's been like an hour and it hasn't dried so anytime i do anything it's a RiskTM
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strawbebyjam · 1 year ago
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thinking about my pear tree
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youstopmyheartfrom50feets · 4 months ago
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What if you did a Remus ending and a James ending?👀
Because I don’t think I can choose! I already regret voting for Remus but I know that I would’ve also regretted voting for James.
It’s impossible to decide between the two😭
Ikrrr!!! It is difficult to choose😭😭
Anyways so, the votes have chosen Remus and I personally don't like the second chance trope but since you're the first person to request me a fic on Tumblr, I had to do it. So this one is for you 🫶🫶
Hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have (alternative ending)
Part 1: The Other Women
Part 2: Violets for Roses
A/n: I am a year late💀💀 I'm sorry, I had been really busy with my school work and literally had no time to write but now I am on a vacation and I can continue writing 😋
Angst/Fluff.
Trigger warnings:- Cheating/infidelity, slight swearing, second chances
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3rd Person POV
The sunrays coming through the window were pricking her eyes. She tried covering them with the pillow but that didn't help with the pain in her eyes.
Heaving a deep sigh, she got up from the bed. That's when she noticed that James was still laying beside her. Before her lips could curve up in a smile, the memories of last night came flooding back to her.
"Lily! Shit! I'm close!"
Those words kept on echoing in her ears. She went inside the bathroom to freshen up but stopped on her tracks when she saw her reflection in the full body mirror at the corner of her room.
Just a few hours ago she looked at a perfect woman with a perfect body, perfect hair and perfect makeup. All fancied-up for her husband.
But now, now she looks at a disheveled face with dark circles under her eyes which were intensified with the smudged mascara. Her eyes were small and puffy from the tears that her pillow absorbed. The white of her eyes still had strands of red in them. Her face was empty of any emotions, the glow that she once had, was gone. She looked exhausted as if she hasn't been able to sleep for centuries.
She let out a silent sigh, shaking her head she went in the bathroom to take a shower. The water felt like bullets entering her body but it didn't hurt. She was desperately trying to wash away the memories of last night but she couldn't. She wanted to crawl back into her bubble but she couldn't. She blamed herself and that damn bubble for the position she is in today.
Only if she had not created the bubble back then, she would've noticed the stolen glances, her husband and her twin shared during the family gatherings.
She cursed her self for being so blind, for falling in love with the man who was in love with her sister.
h
Half an hour later, she came out of the bathroom, dried herself, put on some light makeup and looked at herself in the mirror. She felt pity for the women in the mirror.
She felt the tears prick her eyes but she somehow controlled them and walked downstairs towards the kitchen.
It was a Sunday morning and she was pretty sure James wouldn't wake up anytime soon because of the amount of liquor he had consumed yesterday, so she didn't bother to prepare a breakfast.
She prepared herself a bowl of cereal and started munching on them.
There were whirlpool of emotions wrecking havoc in her brain. She had tried her best to ignore all the concerned voices of her well wishers, telling her about James' infedeility.
She could clearly hear Remus warning her about the possible affair. At the time she didn't pay any attention to his words and now those very words were pricking her throat making their way down to her heart.
Shaking her head and wiping a single tear that sprung out of her eye, she started doing the dishes when she heard footsteps coming down the stairs. She didn't expect James to wakeup so early.
He was in a pair of new boxers, his hair was disheveled and he looked like he came back from death.
"Morning, what's for breakfast?" James asked in a groggy morning voice.
"What do you want, haven't made anything yet."
"Uh, I'll have pancakes and Sirius would probably have bacons and eggs." James let her know his preference.
"Sirius?" She asked him a bit confused.
"Yeah, it's Sunday love, he always has his breakfast with us on Sundays." James reminded her.
She just nodded at him and started preparing the breakfast demanded. She couldn't believe how laid-back he was acting as if he wasn't going behind his wife's back with her sister. How easily he called her 'love' as if he didn't whisper the wrong name last night.
She felt animated, machine-like, controlled by a master. A machine which had no feelings or opinions of her own. Any other woman would confront her husband the very first thing in the morning but she felt like she didn't have the right to do so, the right to question James.
It was physically sickening to think about how many times had he come home after sleeping with her and pretended as if nothing had happen, how many times he must have slept with her after sleeping with her own sister.
She couldn't handle it anymore. The emotions were too overwhelming. She could feel the pressure slowly building in her chest. It felt like she would explode if she didn't confront James. She knew there would be consequences, James didn't do well with confrontations but she was ready to risk it.
She went up to James and looked him dead in the eye.
"James?"
"Yes Y/n/n"
"How long has it been going on for?" She questioned him without missing a beat.
"What's going on?" James genuinely looked confused.
"Since when have you been going behind my back with Lily?"
There was a long silence between the two of them. James looked shocked, confused and a little ashamed but in a fraction of seconds the shame in his eyes turned into anger but the anger fizzed out moments later as of something dawned on him. He had hesitation in his eyes.
"Who is filling your ears against me?" James asked in a low voice, coming dangerously close to her, his demeanor seemingly intimidating.
This made her flinch at first but she quickly gained her composure and calmly replied,
"You took her name in bed last night."
This made all his anger and intimidation fade and guilt and shame took its place instead.
"Nobody provoked me against you James, in fact I chose to ignore all the people who were concerned about me, who thought you were being unfaithful to me. I chose to ignore all those stolen glances, little ambiguous smiles, those indirect flirtious comments you passed. I chose to ignore all of it until I could not. How would you feel if I had taken another man's name in OUR bed on OUR wedding anniversary." She stated in a calm but stern voice.
"The fact is James, unlike for you, you weren't a replacement, you were everything, you were my world. Any sane person would want to hold on to the very last shred of their world. That's what I did until last night, when my entire meaning of existence came down shattering. James, I-I don't know what to do ahead of now, but it is for sure that I won't let you break my heart again.
Letting her stance be known, she swiftly headed for upstairs. James tried to stop her and explain her his side but she wasn't ready for more bulshit.
"Y/N, please listen to me, I-"
"No James, I don't wanna hear anything. There's nothing you can say that'll convince me to be back to normal. You fucked up James, now own upto it and face the consequences."
She couldn't look at James because she knew the moment she looked into his innocent eyes, she'll melt and she couldn't afford doing that.
She locked herself in her bedroom and sat on the floor, leaning against the door. She felt as if her insides were lit on fire. She knew she was going to lose James after this, she might even lose her family, she might lose her whole life.
The thought brought out a sob out of her throat and the tears which flowed yesterday, came rushing back in her eyes, again to fall into mindless oblivion.
This time she wasn't silent, her cries could be clearly heard, her pain could be felt in the surroundings.
A few minutes later, she heard a knock on the door. Before she could ask the person to go away, she heard a known voice call her name.
"Y/n/n, please open the door." Sirius asked in the most soothing voice.
"Go away Sirius, not in a mood to talk." She said in a dejected voice.
"Y/n James is ready for any decision that you make, he'll support you if you want stay and also, if you want to leave but atleast hear him out, there are few things he'd like to make clear."
Sirius's words erupted a volcano inside of her, the anger, the frustration, all the betrayal she had felt for the past 5 years just came rushing down her throat, like clouds filled with rain, eager to pour down.
She angrily opend the door almost breaking it with sheer physical force. She could see the horrified look on Sirius and James's faces but it didn't affect her one bit.
She looked straight into Sirius's eyes and started screaming at him.
"YOU KNEW HE WON'T BE FAITHFUL, YOU KNEW HE WASN'T OVER HER AND YET, YET YOU LET HIM GET MARRIED TO ME! WHY! ONLY TO HAVE MY LIFE RUINED! ONLY FOR MY HUSBAND TO CHEAT ON ME WITH SISTER!
All of this was happening so quickly, she wasn't able to get hold of her emotions. One moment she wanted to disappear and the other she wanted to demand explanations for all her miseries.
She looked at both of them and addressed James,
"Since when has this been going on? Was it before the wedding or after it? Did you fuck her on our wedding day? Oh, did you sleep with her on our first night?"
They both remained quiet, looking at their feet, too ashamed to meet her eyes.
At this point, She was shaking with anger. She could feel her pulse in her head, her heart felt as if someone has lit it on fire. She was desperate for their explanation and then letting them know her decision. But, she didn't know what the decision was. Where would she go, what would she do, how would she survive in this world without friends or family.
"Come on! Give me a damn explanation!" She demanded.
"Y/n I know now is not the moment to ask you to calm down but can we atleast discuss this in the living room, please." Sirius pleaded with a nervous voice.
She didn't say anything, just shot them a look and went towards the living room. Sirius and James followed her and took their seats on the sofas opposite to y/n.
There was a long moment of silence between the three which was then broken by James when he met her questioning eyes.
"I am done hiding things from you y/n and not because you caught me red-handed but because it was weighing my conscience. Y/n, the truth is that yes, I first started dating you in order to make Lily jealous but as time went on, I realized you were the best alternative to Lily I could find." James paused, shame clear in his eyes.
Those words felt like daggers in her chest. These thoughts have occurred to her before, people have repeated those exact words to her but hearing them from James had made it all too real.
"But after our wedding I decided to leave Lily behind and give you a chance.............give us a chance. Believe it or not y/n/n, I did fall in love with you, it only took me a few weeks to realize it. The moment I saw you as an individual, a person on your own and not as a different version of Lily, I knew i would be hopelessly in love with you-"
"If that was the case why did you act so cold against me?" She cut James before he could stop speaking.
"Why would you only talk to me when needed, why won't you let me touch you when we'd be physical, why would you sleep in a different room on a different bed?" She questioned with sorrow and agony in her voice.
Any women would feel the same if she would hear her husband confessing his love for her when he had taken her sister's name in bed the night before. She felt cheated, deceived, robbed even. Had Lily not existed, this man who had the ability to love in such pure form would be all hers.
"That is because I wanted to come clean to you some day and then start afresh, until then I didn't want us to live like a normal couple because that would've been deceiving you."
"You have deceived me James! You've cheated on me with my bloody sister!" She exclaimed furiously.
"I agree I have but it wasn't the case until a few months ago, we've been sleeping together for only the past few months." James explained.
"Bulshit! Utter, pure bulshit!" She sneered at James.
"Everyone saw how you and her used to flirt at any given time you both were in the same room."
"Yes I agree but that was it, just flirting. I started sleeping with her only a few months ago. I'm telling the truth." James explained himself.
"When Lily showed up at my office and asked me to hook up with her, I refused at first but she persisted and I had a moment of weakness and I caved in." James confessed seemingly ashamed of his actions.
She didn't know how much longer she'd be able to keep her dinner inside her, she felt extremely nauseous and head spun as if she had just used a portkey.
"I wanted to end it Y/N, trust me, that's why I asked Lily to come meet me at bar. We had a ugly fight and I drank a little too much in frustration. I wanted to come clean to you, tell you everything and hopefully start everything from the beginning. But last night didn't go as planned." James elucidated the events of last night.
She felt her mouth drying up but gathered herself and asked the dreadful question.
"One last question, did you sleep with her last night before coming home?"
She questioned, her heartbeats hammering in her ears.
"No. I didn't, I took her name because she was the last person I saw before I got drunk and also that...... that I had developed a h-habit of taking her name."
James hesitantly whispered his answer.
She could feel the ball of pain growing in her throat, she knew the tears would start filling her eyes any second now, she wanted to run out of the mansion and never look back and just keep running until her feet don't work anymore.
"I know that forgiving me would seem like a mammoth task but I can't do anything but apologize to you. I am so sorry, I truly do love you Y/n. Give me a chance and I will prove that to you."
James apologized to her.
"I can't James........ I have to go away from you." She let out a hollow whisper.
"I am really sorry Y/n, I promise you I'll be a better husband, a better person. Please don't leave me." James begged her.
The rawness in his voice rendered her speechless. How cursed she was to fall in love with someone who hurt her so terribly. She wanted to advocate her stance but Sirius did it for her instead, much to her relief.
"James mate, I think you should give her some time, let her recollect herself. She needs space, she's not in the right headspace to make the correct the correct decision."
"But I-I......" James tried to counter Sirius's point but found himself unable to do so.
"Fine. Y/n, I'll give you the space you need, as long as you want." James stated with an earnest expression.
She was having a hard time keeping herself composed, she wanted to sob, cry, scream, collapse but all she did was nod her head.
"You can stay at my place for as long as you want." Sirius offered.
Had it been some other time, she would've protested and insisted upon finding her own place but she was too tired to open her mouth and form words so she agreed with a nod of her head.
She went upstairs to her bedroom where summoned a packed suitcase with her essentials in it with a flick of her wand and and went down towards the door where Sirius and James where talking whilst waiting for her.
"You ready?" Sirius asked.
"Hm." She replied with a hum.
She apperated to Sirius's house with a crack. The moment Sirius's living room came into her line of vision, she collapsed on her knees and started wailing with gut-wrenching sobs.
Sirius sat beside her and wrapped his arms around her to give her some kind of comfort. She cling to Sirius's arm and mourned her life.
As the days turned into weeks and then months, Y/N's heartache slowly began to heal. Living with Sirius provided her with the support she needed, but the wound was still fresh, and the memories lingered. She found solace in the routine, the quiet moments of reflection, and the occasional outbursts of tears that Sirius patiently endured.
It had been a month and the wounds had started to close if not healed. She tried to not think about the incident and the confrontation but James was deeply embedded in her life, her memories, her soul. She could often feel the sorrow in her magic as she cast normal household spells. She had insisted on moving out but Sirius had convinced her to stay with him for a few more months. He had also convinced her to get a job just to keep her busy.
She had never thought of having to work as she always imagined herself to be James's housewife, so it took her while to figure out a job that fit her intrests. She settled for a job as salesperson and receptionist at the a florist shop at downtown London, not far from Sirius's studio apartment.
It was March now. It had been 2 months since the incident. She was getting acquainted with her life now and she liked it. It was one of those evenings where she had returned tired from a busy Spring day at the shop when she heard the enchanted door ring the familiar magical ring it made when it detected magic at the threshold. Expecting it to be Sirius, she opened the door, only to be left with her jaws dropped at the floor.
It was Lily.
She was at loss of words. It felt like someone was stabbing her heart with a dagger. But there was something odd about Lily, something out of character.
She looked frail.Her face was pale, eyes red from crying, and she looked genuinely remorseful.
"Hi." Lily broke the silence.
"What do you want?" She couldn't help but frown at her audacity.
"I....I want to talk." Lily replied hesitantly.
"But I don't." She answered bluntly and almost close the door on her face.
"Y/n please! Please, just let me apologize and explain myself. I know what I have done is horrible but please just hear me out once. Then, if you want I'll never show you my face ever again." Lily begged like a little child.
She didn't want to hear her out or listen to some sloppy explanation like "I was not in my senses, or I didn't know what I was doing" but her love of her sister seemed to contradict her mind. It had always been her weakness. Her loved ones had always been her weakness and surely they were using it against her quite well.
She couldn't help herself so she sighed, though initially hesitant, finally agreed to let her sister in the living room.
They sat on the counch, facing each other.
"So, start explaining yourself." She broke the silence sternly.
She saw Lily taking a deep breath and she readied herself to not fall for her hollow explanation and playing the victim card, like all the cheaters.
"Y/N, I know I don't deserve your forgiveness," Lily began, her voice trembling.
"But I need you to know that I am truly sorry. I won't say that I didn't know what I was doing because I did. It was deliberate. I did this because I was jealous, because I couldn’t stand the thought of you having something that I used to have. It was selfish and wrong.
"When James asked me to meet him on your anniversary, I was mad at him. I thought everything was going good so why would he want to end it. I didn't understand that until I visited James until a few days after and I saw how miserable he was. He told me everything and also showed me the memories of consequences he faced the morning after in a pensieve." Lily took a long shuddering breath.
"I saw how miserable you were, how hurt you were. I don't know why, I thought you were not much attached to James but I could see the pain and love for him in your eyes and it haunted me. I could live with myself. I realised my fault and it took a while to gather the courage but here I am. I am sorry y/n/n. I-I don't know how I can redeem myself but I am ashamed of my acts. Lily apologized.
She listened, her expression unreadable. She felt a mixture of anger and sadness but also a tinge of understanding. Her apology somehow felt real, as if she really meant it. Maybe she did. Only time will tell.
"Lily, I appreciate your honesty. It’s going to take time, but I do forgive you. We’re family, and I don’t want to lose you. But things can’t go back to the way they were overnight."
Lily nodded, tears streaming down her face.
"I understand. Thank you for giving me a chance. And please, think about forgiving James too. He’s been a mess without you."
She sighed, looking down at her hands. She felt a pang in hee chest hearing his name.
"I need more time for that, Lily. I’m not ready yet." Her reply was a mere whisper.
" I understand. I'm sorry to have you put in this position. Know that I will a accept any punishment you intend to give me."
Lily assured her.
"No Lily, I don't want to punish you. Give me some time. Time will heal everything."
"I hope so." Lily crossed her fingers.
She just gave her a pained smile.
"Hope is a dangerous thing."
Six months had drifted by like petals on the wind, and she was gradually finding her way back to herself. With the money she had saved over the years, she purchased the quaint florist shop where she had once merely worked, transforming it into a blooming sanctuary of her own creation. Her days were now graced by the delicate fragrance of flowers and the quiet satisfaction of nurturing something beautiful. In her free moments, she reveled in the companionship of Remus and Sirius, who had found love in each other. Life was beginning to resemble a canvas painted with hues of peace and contentment, and for the first time in what felt like an eternity, she felt truly at home in her own skin.
Autumn had sneaked up in the country like a robber in the dark of midnight. Spring and Summer had gone in a haze but now was her time to relax. Autumn was an off season so the shop remained mostly empty. She asked her helper to take over the desk and went to the coffee shop across the street.
The crisp air was a welcome change, carrying with it the scent of fallen leaves and the promise of a quieter pace.
Entering the cozy café, she greeted the familiar barista with a warm smile and ordered her favorite seasonal brew. She chose a corner seat by the window, where she could watch the world outside transform into a tapestry of gold and crimson. As she sipped her coffee, she let her mind wander, appreciating the stillness of the moment. The café buzzed softly with the murmur of conversations and the clinking of cups, but she felt cocooned in her own peaceful bubble.
Glancing around, her eyes fell on a familiar figure at the far end of the room. James was there, looking more worn and haggard than she remembered. He hadn’t noticed her yet, absorbed in his thoughts. Her heart skipped a beat, torn between the hurt of the past and the faint stirrings of old affections. She took a deep breath, unsure if she was ready for this encounter, but also recognizing that perhaps this was the universe’s way of nudging her towards closure.
She watched James for a moment, her mind racing. Finally, she took a deep breath and approached his table.
"James," she said softly.
James looked up, startled. "Y/n?" He blinked, as if unsure whether she was real. "I didn't expect to see you here."
She nodded, feeling a mix of emotions. "I didn't expect to see you either. How have you been?"
James sighed, running a hand through his disheveled hair. "Not great, honestly. I've missed you."
She took a seat across from him, wrapping her hands around her coffee cup. "I've been... healing. It's been a tough journey, but I'm getting there."
"I can see that," he said, his eyes filled with regret. "I know I hurt you, and I don't expect you to forgive me, but I need you to know how sorry I am."
She nodded, the weight of his words sinking in. "I know, James. And I've been trying to move on. I even bought the florist shop where I used to work."
His face lit up for a moment. "That's wonderful. You've always loved flowers."
"Yes," she smiled faintly. "It's been a dream come true. And Remus and Sirius have been a great support. They're dating now, you know."
James chuckled softly. "I figured something was going on between them. I'm glad you have them."
She looked at him, searching for the right words. "James, I don't know what the future holds, but I think it's important we both find our own paths. Maybe one day, we can start anew, but for now, I need to focus on myself."
"I understand," he said, his voice heavy with sorrow. "I just hope that one day, you'll find it in your heart to give us another chance."
She reached across the table and squeezed his hand. "We'll see. For now, take care of yourself."
James nodded, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. "You too, Y/n."
With that, she stood up and walked back to her table by the window, feeling a sense of closure wash over her. It wasn't a perfect ending, but it was a start. And in the quiet of the autumn afternoon, she found a small measure of peace.
As she settled back into her seat, she watched James leave the café, his shoulders hunched slightly as if carrying the weight of the world. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, feeling a strange mixture of sadness and relief.
Later that evening, she closed the shop, the bells on the door jingling softly as she locked up. The air was crisp, and the streets were illuminated by the soft glow of streetlights. She wrapped her scarf tighter around her neck and started walking towards Remus and Sirius's apartment.
When she arrived, Sirius opened the door with a broad grin. "Hey, there you are! We were just about to start a movie. Come on in."
Remus greeted her with a warm smile from the kitchen. "Hi, Y/n. Want some tea? We just made a fresh pot."
"Tea sounds perfect," she replied, hanging up her coat and joining them in the living room.
As the three of them settled in, with Remus handing her a steaming mug of tea, Sirius started the movie. She felt a sense of comfort in their presence, a reminder that she wasn't alone in her journey.
Halfway through the movie, she couldn't help but reflect on her encounter with James earlier. She shared her thoughts with Remus and Sirius, their supportive presence helping her process her feelings.
"You did the right thing," Remus said gently. "Healing takes time, and it's important to focus on yourself."
Sirius nodded in agreement. "And remember, we're here for you, no matter what."
She smiled, feeling grateful for their unwavering support. "Thank you, both of you. I don't know what I'd do without you."
As the movie continued, she leaned back, sipping her tea and letting the warmth of their friendship envelop her. The future was still uncertain, but for now, she felt content knowing she had the strength to face whatever came her way.
The next morning, she opened her shop with a renewed sense of purpose. The scent of fresh flowers filled the air, and she took a moment to appreciate the beauty around her. Each day was a step forward, a chance to rebuild her life and rediscover herself.
As the days turned into weeks, she found joy in the little things—arranging bouquets, chatting with customers, and spending time with Remus and Sirius. The wounds of the past were healing, slowly but surely, and she began to see the world in a new light.
One afternoon, while arranging a particularly beautiful bouquet of autumn flowers, she heard the door chime. She looked up and saw James standing there, holding a single red rose.
"Hi, Y/n," he said softly. "I was hoping we could talk."
She hesitated for a moment, then nodded. "Alright, let's talk."
They sat down at a small table near the window, the sunlight casting a warm glow over them. James took a deep breath, his eyes earnest and filled with sincerity.
"I've been doing a lot of thinking," he began. "I know I hurt you deeply, and I don't expect you to forget that. But I want to try and make things right. I want to show you that I can be the man you deserve."
She looked into his eyes, searching for the truth in his words. "James, it's not going to be easy. Trust needs to be rebuilt, and it will take time."
"I understand," he replied, his voice steady. "I'm willing to put in the effort, to prove to you that I've changed. But I also respect your need for space and time to heal."
She nodded, appreciating his honesty. "We'll take it one step at a time, James. I'm not making any promises, but I'm willing to see where this goes."
A small smile appeared on his face, hope flickering in his eyes. "Thank you, Y/n. That's all I can ask for."
As they continued to talk, she felt a glimmer of possibility. The path ahead was uncertain, but she was willing to take the first steps towards healing and perhaps, one day, finding a way back to each other.
With the changing seasons, she found strength in herself and in the support of those who cared for her. And as the leaves fell and the air grew colder, she knew that no matter what happened, she had the resilience to face whatever came her way.
It had been a week since James had visited her shop and they had been exchanging casual owls with each other over the week but James wanted to do something more. He planned something special.
James had spent the entire morning nervously rehearsing his plan. He knew he had to do something special, something that would make her smile and show her just how much he cared. He had roped in Sirius and Remus for help, and they had set the stage for what he hoped would be an unforgettable moment.
As she walked into the florist shop, she was greeted by an unusual sight. The usually tidy counter was now adorned with a massive bouquet of her favorite flowers, arranged in the shape of a heart. A small note was tucked into the center, and she picked it up, her curiosity piqued.
"Follow the petals," it read.
With a bemused smile, she noticed a trail of rose petals leading out the door. She followed them, stepping into the crisp autumn air. The petals led her across the street and into the park, where she saw James standing beneath a large oak tree, looking a little nervous but determined.
He was holding a sign that read, "Will you go out on a date with me?" in big, bold letters. But that wasn't all. As soon as she stepped closer, James flipped the sign to reveal the back, which was filled with smaller, hand-written notes, each one detailing a different reason why he wanted to take her out.
"Because you make me laugh."
"Because I love the way your eyes light up when you talk about flowers."
"Because I want to show you how much I care."
The list went on, and with each reason, her heart melted a little more.
James took a deep breath and stepped forward, holding out a single red rose. "Y/n, I know I've made mistakes, and I know I've hurt you. But I want to make it right. I want to spend time with you, show you how much you mean to me. Will you give me the honor of taking you out on a date?"
She looked at the rose, then at James, who was gazing at her with hopeful eyes. She couldn’t help but laugh at the sheer cheesiness of it all, but it was sweet, and it was sincere.
"Okay, James," she said, taking the rose from his hand. "I'd love to go out on a date with you."
James's face lit up with a smile so bright it could have rivaled the sun. He pulled out a small notepad from his pocket, where he had scribbled down his plans for the day.
"I have everything planned out," he said excitedly. "First, we'll have a picnic in the park. I made all your favorite foods. Then, we'll visit that little bookshop you love, and later, we can go to the cinema to watch that movie you've been wanting to see."
She couldn’t stop smiling. "You really went all out, didn’t you?"
"I wanted it to be perfect," James admitted. "You deserve nothing less."
She felt her heart swell with affection. "Then let's get started."
They spent the day together, enjoying each other's company and laughing more than they had in months. As the sun began to set, they found themselves back in the park, lying on a blanket and watching the stars appear in the twilight sky.
James turned to her, his expression soft and earnest. "Thank you for giving me this chance, Y/n. Today has been amazing."
"It really has," she agreed, squeezing his hand. "And thank you for going through all this trouble. It means a lot to me."
He smiled, leaning in to kiss her forehead. "Anything for you. Always."
And as they lay there under the stars, she realized that maybe, just maybe, they could find their way back to each other after all.
Months had stretched between them like a cold, unyielding winter, a time marked by the echoes of old promises shattered by James’s betrayal. The hurt had been a bitter wound, one that seemed to grow deeper with each passing day of their separation. Yet through that distance, James had worked tirelessly to mend what he had broken, proving himself not with grand gestures, but through the quiet, steadfast presence that had slowly healed her wounded heart.
Now, in Sirius’s apartment, the air was filled with the warmth of a love renewed. The space was softly illuminated by the gentle flicker of the TV, its light casting a golden hue on the room’s familiar contours. The movie played, a backdrop to their shared silence, a silence that spoke volumes of the journey they had traversed together.
James and her were on the same couch, their bodies close but not touching, as if each was testing the waters of trust and closeness once more. Their fingers brushed tentatively, a gesture that had once been routine but now carried the weight of their shared past and the promise of a hopeful future. James’s eyes were filled with a mixture of longing and apology, his heart laid bare before her.
After months of earnest efforts and heartfelt confessions, James had shown her that he had grown, that he understood the gravity of his mistakes and the depth of her worth. The painful past was not forgotten, but it was acknowledged with a sincerity that spoke of a genuine desire for redemption. Their renewed love was not the same as it had been, but it was stronger, tempered by the trials they had endured.
As the evening wore on, their conversation drifted from the past to the present, from the shadows of their former selves to the light of the lives they were now building together. Slowly, they leaned into each other, their shoulders touching, their hands finding their way back to one another. The comfort of their closeness was a balm to old wounds, a sign that they were moving forward, not just revisiting old ground.
James took a deep breath, his heart pounding as he gathered the courage to ask the question he had held close for so long. He reached for her hand, his fingers interlacing with hers as if to anchor himself in the moment. “Y/n,” he said, his voice steady but laced with the emotion of their shared journey, “we’ve been through so much. I know I hurt you, and I’ve spent these months showing you that I’m not the person I was before. I know that words alone can’t erase the past, but I hope that my actions have shown you how deeply I love you and how much you mean to me.”
He looked into her eyes, his own filled with both hope and vulnerability. “Will you marry me, again?”
Her gaze met his, and in that shared look was a mixture of joy and remembrance, of forgiveness and a future envisioned. A gentle smile touched her lips, her voice steady as she answered, “Yes, James. I will marry you, again.”
In that tender moment, as they embraced on the couch, the weight of their past and the promise of their future seemed to blend into a perfect harmony. They lay there together, a symbol of love’s resilience and a testament to the power of second chances. The shadows of the past faded into the gentle glow of their renewed commitment, and they knew that this time, their love was not just a fleeting dream but a promise of forever.
It was January again, a full year since “the incident,” and the cold of the season seemed to only enhance the warmth of their love. A great deal had changed since then. She was no longer the same woman who had faced betrayal with a broken heart. She was stronger, her soul healed and brighter, her relationships deepened and more meaningful. She was closer to herself, to James, and to the people who had stood by her through the darkest days.
On this January evening, as snow gently blanketed the world outside, she prepared for their third anniversary—a day that now held the promise of a future unfettered by doubt. The anticipation of this celebration was a stark contrast to the uncertainty that had shrouded her thoughts three years ago. The room was filled with a soft light, and the air was rich with the fragrance of blooming winter flowers.
Lily stood by her side as her maid of honor, their past differences having long been reconciled. Sirius, as James’s best man, stood nearby, a proud smile on his face as he shared in the joy of the occasion. This time, Remus was present, a beloved friend who had also been the one to walk she down the aisle. His gentle presence was a comforting reminder of the bonds that had been mended and the love that had endured.
The ceremony was a fairytale in every sense. The venue was adorned with delicate white flowers and twinkling fairy lights that cast a magical glow over the gathered guests. The vows they exchanged were heartfelt and tender, capturing the depth of their renewed commitment.
James began, his voice steady yet choked with emotion. "She, from the moment I met you, I knew my life was forever changed. Through my mistakes and our hardships, you have shown me the meaning of true love and forgiveness. Today, I vow to cherish you, to stand by you through all of life’s trials and triumphs, and to love you with a heart that is wholly yours.”
She took a deep breath, her eyes glistening as she looked at James. “James, you have been my greatest joy and my deepest challenge. Through our journey, you have proven that love can heal and grow stronger with time. I vow to support you, to honor you, and to love you fiercely, just as you have loved me. Together, let us build a life filled with grace, patience, and boundless affection.”
As they were pronounced husband and wife, the kiss they shared was a symbol of the love that had been rekindled, pure and unblemished by past shadows. Their kiss was a promise of the future they would share, a silent testament to a year of growth and renewal.
The reception that followed was filled with laughter and joy. She and James shared their first dance as a married couple, the music enveloping them in a cocoon of happiness. As they swayed to the melody, the world seemed to pause around them, the love they shared evident in every tender touch and gaze.
Later in the evening, amidst the joyful chaos of the party, Lily approached Y/n with a sincere smile. “I’m so happy for you, Y/n,” she said, her eyes filled with both regret and hope. “I hope you stay happy like this forever.”
Y/n’s smile was gentle, her eyes reflecting the hope she had carried through the years. “Hope is a dangerous thing for a woman with my past,” she replied softly. “But I have it.”
In that moment, as she looked at Lily and felt the embrace of the love surrounding her, Y/n knew that hope was not just a fleeting wish but a steadfast companion on the path they walked together. The evening continued in a swirl of joy and celebration, a testament to the enduring power of love and the promise of a future built on a foundation of trust and hope.
And as the night wore on, with the echoes of laughter and the gentle strains of music weaving through the air, James and Y/n danced beneath the stars, their hearts aligned in a shared dream of forever.
Losing herself in her husband's embrace, she finally found her peace. The warm realisation dawned over her that she won't all alone. She will actually have her husband by her side.
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kokomochi · 2 years ago
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𝐃𝐄𝐉𝐀 𝐕𝐔 | 𝐤𝐨𝐤𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐣𝐢𝐦𝐞
"𝙞'𝙢 𝙝𝙤𝙢𝙚, 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮."
years have passed and just when you thought that ten years are enough for her to forget her first love- it wasn't, nor does it look like she'll move on anytime soon. with her business spiraling down, her father hired her a new secretary in hopes to save the business. what she and her secretary thought was a simple office relationship, turned into something even more.
12. letting her down slowly
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they say that letting go of the past helps you move forward to the future- and that's exactly what kokonoi hajime was doing.
after dropping off the young manager at the prison center, he decided to make one final stop to the past that anchored him down for the last twelve years.
where you may ask? the cemetery of course.
how long has it been since he last visited? a decade or so? ah who knows, all that's in his mind right now is to visit one particular family tombstone that's located at the very back of this depressing place.
he hated going here when he was still a teen- couldn't handle the smell of incense and chrysanthemums that people would leave on the foot of their loved ones' resting place.
but of course, he needed to at least give inui akane a proper goodbye, it's what she deserves to say the least.
the soles of his dress shoes crunched the luscious green grass beneath him, eyes landing on the familiar marble just in the distance. the silver-haired man silently thanked the gods that the place was relatively empty- save for the stray cats that were lurking about, but that's about it.
and as much as he dreaded looking down at her engraved name on that stone, he was finally standing in front of it with his head down in respect.
kokonoi wasn't a very religious man- growing up with only money on his mind never really gave him the headspace to think about anything else, so his 'prayer' was just him being silent for a long minute.
dark eyes solemnly looked at the burned-out incense and dried-out flowers, wincing inwardly to himself- should've at least bought flowers you know?
"yo, akane. it's been a while hasn't it?" he began, a sigh leaving his lips as he sat down on the stone ground beneath him, not caring if his suit was going to get dirt on it or not.
as expected, only the sounds of the fluttering birds above him was his only response. not that he minded of course, he was the one talking to thin air.
if he was the same man that he was back then, his eyes would've welled with tears by now- chanting his usual 'i could've saved you' like a prayer.
the man grew out of it, of course, knowing and accepting that all things happen for a reason- and if the gods planned to take akane from this world at a very young age then so be it. even with mountains of wealth under his name, he wasn't a god to have a say on it.
"sorry i haven't visited in so long, kind of busy with my work and all." he had a solemn smile etched on his features, eyes never meeting the marble stone as he watched the leaves fall from their branches.
"a lot has happened the past few years, and when i saw a lot i mean a shit ton of it."
kokonoi hajime never thought that after a decade of not seeing her, he would've expected himself to be sad- telling her all of the things that had happened with a pain struck heart. but for some reason, all he felt was relief.
"i still like money- obviously. and i'm also now a part of a big shot criminal organization, hooray i guess." god did he feel pathetic talking to no one else but himself, but it's alright.
as long as he says what he's come here to say, then he wouldn't mind talking to thin air for an hour or so.
silence dawned upon him, dark eyes trained at the incense that was letting out its final smoke- a trail of grey fluttering up into the heavens like some sort of offering.
"hey... did you remember the promise that i told you back then? you know... the whole 'i'll marry you when we grow older'?" a chuckle left his lips, eyes closed trying to dull down the pain that he was feeling.
even after how much time passed by him, it still hurts like a god damn bitch. but you know, it didn't hurt as it did back then- or even a month ago way before he met l/n y/n.
"you told me that you'd wait for me... didn't you?"
to let go is to grow- taking down the chains that keeps you strayed at the bottom of the ocean and swimming to the surface. forgetting about the past and focusing on your future, that's what it means to let go.
"well... i'm here to ask you a question."
"inui akane, will you wait for me a little longer? for another life for us to be together?"
and now kokonoi hajime has let go of the girl that he once fell in love with and swam to the surface where l/n y/n was waiting for him.
his fingers weaved themselves through his silver tresses, a sigh escaping from his lips as a small smile etched itself onto his features- never feeling so relieved in his entire life that he finally had the courage to let go.
"i know that i promised you that you're gonna be the one who i'm marrying in this lifetime but... fate had other plans for us no?"
the sounds of the leaves dancing with the wind serves as his white noise, giving him a calm ambiance that soothed his nerves.
it is painful of course- but that's the best part of growing up. the pain only lasts temporarily, and if he can take a punch or two from his opponents then he can take a little bullet to the heart.
another wave of silence dawned upon him, hands supporting himself as he leaned back to appreciate the warmth of the sun above him- afternoons in tokyo were always the best time of the day for him.
his mind flashed him an image of the young manager, a smile etched on her face with a dandelion in between her ink-stained fingers. he can still weirdly smell the fresh scent of the peaches and dandelions that they visited earlier today.
kokonoi couldn't help but smile to himself with a mix of glee and adoration- completely acting like some love-struck teenager from a movie, g you know, the characters that he hated with a burning passion.
"you see... there's this woman that i like, and at first she reminded me of you in a very peculiar way but- it was all in my head."
"in reality, i was scared to admit that i was falling for her because i didn't want to end up being heartbroken again... but i couldn't really help it."
right now, he couldn't care whether the birds stop singing or the trees stop dancing- because right now, he's letting down the girl whom he promised a life with for another who his heart was beating for.
"she's an amazing woman. with the softest (h/c) hair and those vibrant (e/c) eyes, i continued to fall for her even deeper than i imagined myself to be."
"her name is l/n y/n- and she's the woman who i want to spend this lifetime with."
kokonoi gave the stone a closed-eyed grin as if to tell akane that he was just fine and happy right now- which he is of course.
a small smile etched itself onto his features, eyes looking down at her engraved name with a look of endearment.
"so if it isn't too much to ask. i'd like for you to wait for me- and in our next life, i promise to marry you."
and just like magic, the silver-haired man felt a gentle gush of wind- hair blowing forward with his eyes slightly widened.
was this inui akane giving him an answer? if so then was it a yes? the wind was a gentle one, complementing the afternoon sunshine that shone above his head.
kokonoi chuckled knowing that the wind was nothing but a natural phenomenon- but it's couldn't hurt for him to imagine it as her reply.
he stood up, dusting his pants and giving the marble stone one last smile.
"then that settles it."
"see you in our next life, akane."
with a final salute, he began walking out of the place with his hands inside of his pocket just in time that someone called him.
raising a brow, he took it out. the look of confusion on his face was replaced with a softer one- pressing the accept button with a smile on his face.
"y/n? are you done?" he heard her hum in response, chuckling to himself as he took out his car keys and began walking to his car before starting the engine.
"alright then. i'm coming to pick you up."
"can we go eat after?"
kokonoi couldn't stop himself from chuckling at how cute she sounded- softly asking his permission just like that. oh god, he couldn't help but feel his heartbeat erratically inside his chest.
"anything for you."
some people would tell you that letting go of someone that you once loved hurts- and that the pain would never disappear even when you have found some else to hold.
but in kokonoi hajime's case, l/n y/n was the only solution for him to forget about the ungodly amount of pain that he had been through.
and oh, remember when he told us that he would never love again after akane? well... if it was for the young manager then it wouldn't hurt for him to try again.
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kozutenshi · 4 years ago
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with the strings of his lyre—semi eita.
a 2.3k word long myth retelling.
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what was it, what did he do that made you fall for him?
was it the way he looks at you, sideways with that sparkle in his eyes as he strummed his stringed instrument like how he did the same to your heartstrings, or how his voice silenced the ones shouting in your head and had calmed you down more times than you thought?
you didn't know. more like, you didn't need to know.
it is true that he's impatient and somehow ill-tempered but he was hardworking, the callouses of his hands from the instrument he handled with care a proof of how many hours he had practiced. you adored him for that, with his pout, his smile, his laugh and his song.
was it the warmth, the calm, the charm? was it the spring that he always seem to bring with him whenever his music reaches your ears?
you didn't need to know the reason. you just simply love him like how he does to you.
what was it that made him fall for you? you were ordinary compared to him; everyone knew & see that fact, even you.
and yet, why are his songs dedicated to you?
was it the way you intensely look at him, always enjoying his music? maybe it was the eagerness to learn more about him, devoting yourself to not just listen to him, but understand him. maybe it was the fact that the nagging thought in his mind that no one will see through his temper & notes had stayed silent ever since you came.
was it the way you'll bring him the strength, the love, the way he always feels as if he was a dream whenever he looks at you?
he didn't know. he didn't mind it, though.
he was grateful of the patience and the comforting silence that he can never get as others demand his music.
he was thankful he had met you, had a chance to love you, and to hold you in his arms as his everlasting spring made everything bloom just for you.
"marry me y/n. then let's go somewhere far. away from prying eyes. won't you like that?"
the earth hummed with you as you answered him with a breathy agreement. the spirits of the trees and the flowers danced as he took your hand kept you in his arms until the sun sunk in the horizon.
it was wonderful, like a myth. magical, as if gods had descended upon you two to bless your future union.
he held you close to him that night, the silk drapes and the gold accessories all gone from your skin. a soft thin blanket covered the two of you just right, your scent intertwining with his.
it was just simply you and him.
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"semi? do you mind if i go with my friends to the meadow?" he smiled slightly as your bright eyes met his, eager to be with your friends. he shook his head. "take your time, love." you giggled at his tiny blush as he realized what he had said though you yourself had felt your face heat up. you waved your hand as you ran towards your friends, leaving semi under the tree next to your home.
the view was peaceful but a tug on his chest made him feel unsettled. it was dull but his mind was scattered & he didn't know what to do.
what was that feeling?
he was thinking into his feelings, staring off to nowhere, when a hand was on his shoulder.
"semi! y/n-" he snapped out of his thoughts as he turned towards the source of the voice.
it was one of your friends that had come running, frantically pointing at the direction they came from with tears of panic streaming down their face. "-bitten!"
maybe it wasn't seen, maybe no one had felt it, but he could feel himself slowly sinking, the weight on his throat familiar to him as his tears sprung from his eyes whe he reached the meadow.
he didn't need to know how. he just wanted to be there for you, just in time for your shallow breaths, your last words as his heart breaks over again.
but fate has never been on his side. there you were; your figure laid on the grass, looking awfully peaceful, as if you were just sleeping. silently, he cradled you in his arms, the blades of the grass caressing your skin.
he smoothed out the wrinkles of your dress, taking specks of dirt out mechanically as he placed his forehead on yours. there were no signs of terrible pain; just a bite mark on your foot.
his heart in pieces, he weeped.
every mortal life can meet its end anytime. he knew that so well.
but why did it have to be now for the one he loves? he wanted to take you in his arms, to sway you under the moonlight, inhale your scent whenever you pull him close to you.
all that turned to nothing.
the dryads watched him carefully, not knowing what to do for who knows what. he was talking to you with hushed words that only the wind can hear, his hand on yours. his tears had long dried & his eyes, red and puffy, had a tinge of stubborn conviction in them.
he laid you in a bed of flowers that day, letting you rest. the earth was eerily quiet, enough that even the gods had peered down curiously when the music and tunes of the young lover didn't reach their ears.
he denied it. for him, you were just resting in the small solace of the fragrant petals to remind you of his touch. he refused to give you to the gods. the sheer motivation and the stupidity of his plan made him cringe but he had no choice.
he'll go to the divine beings themselves if it means getting you back by his side.
he'll travel the whole world in search for a way to bring you back.
he'll walk through hell as long as he'll get to hold you in his arms as his spring envelopes you again ethereally as you smiled at him.
he'll find a way. he'll surely find a path to take.
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the trees weeped with his new music, the sky poured. the gods on the high seats of olympus watched the puny mortal struggle and the earth with him. he didn't know if it was pity on him, pity on the world or his prayers being answered as the words had reached their ears, but eventually, he had found the secret to the underworld.
the descent was hard but he had now reached the throne room, hades in all his glory. the temperature was eerily low and the smell of earth was dulled out along with his senses. on the throne next to hades sat her majesty queen persephone, flowers wrapped around his fingers as she wills them to do so.
death & spring together; like how you left him in that one afternoon.
he poured his heart onto the song, every note singing of his love for his muse and maybe hades had also teared up at some point, it won't do anything but give him pity points.
"a soul can never return. that is just the nature of this world." persephone would've agreed with her husband if not for the familiar look of the boy's face.
"the balance of the world had already tipped he moment you, a mortal who hasn't lost his life, had set foot to the underworld. do you really think taki-"
"let's give him a chance."
stunned by the soft voice, hades' attention turned towards persephone. the silent plea in her eyes broke the coldness of his stare and he could only sigh as persephone persuaded him with a silent request.
"you will do this for me too, if you were in his place, right?"
gulping down the bile on his throat as he puts himself in the boy's shoes, he summoned your soul to the throne.
a soft smile spread across his queen's lips as the boy's arms enveloped around your body.
"i missed you. so much."
you could feel his tears on your shoulders, his warmth on your fingers. you could hear the broken tremor in his voice, raw from singing and crying.
but your vision was too dim to see him.
all you knew was that you feel loved with him. the memories were now just blurs, and you can't help but remember the sensation. the only memory you have of him, his familiar scent and warmth, was him sobbing, his words of love reaching your ears like a faint dream until everything felt and glowed vaguely, and your consciousness worked in your sleep. everything felt soft, as if flower petals caressed you in your slumber. the next thing you knew is that you were in this throne room, wandering around as the god of the underworld welcomed you.
you had aimlessly wandered around after then, slowly losing your sense of time and sight. was it day or night? was the sun out or the dark veil full of stars? how long has it been? your emotions were dulled. you were aware of your lack of pulse and the screams and wails of the spirits all around you.
a lost spirit.
you were fed up with it until a tune reached your ears instead of cries for help. curiously you had walked towards it, a sense of calm overcoming your body. the music seemed to reach everyone and the underworld had fallen silent.
the souls didn't know what to feel. they weren't supposed to feel but they wanted it.
they wanted to know the feeling of feeling.
but no matter how cliche it is, the raw thing in his voice and the way he had strummed radiated pure love and adoration. pain and suffering.
and all of it towards you.
unknowingly, your tears fell down, your voice but a breath as you recalled, so soft that it only sounded like a whisper. "semi."
he wiped his tears as he held your hand. "i've come to take you back, my love."
hades watched the interaction awkwardly, wanting to take persephone in his arms too, only to see thanatos shooting him a disappointed gaze.
the dead can't live for no price.
he cleared his throat before speaking. "on one condition."
the two of you looked up to the pair of gods in front of you. hades apologetically looked at persephone who had shot him a look at his side before turning to your pair.
"you can take her, yes, but on one condition: don't ever look back."
his brows furrowed but he nodded at the strange request.
"if one of you looks back, she won't be able to see the light of the sun anymore."
semi gulped nervously only to feel your cold thumb brushing on the veins of his hand.you clutched it tightly, depending on your sense of touch. he inhaled a sharp breath before nodding more prominently.
"i understand." hades nodded, clasping his hands together. "well then, i wish you both happiness at the end of this trial."
and so the ascending started.
it was painfully slow but you have never felt at home. he took you by your hand and led you up to the small stream of light you can't see through your eyes.
his smell has even left your reach, the only thing connecting you were your hands and the vague sound of his boots, echoing.
you can hear a bit of his voice but you didn't understand; cannot understand. you were trying so hard to hear him but your senses have dulled, your voice gone. you were no longer human.
a soul. you were just a wandering empty soul, the shell of his lover.
the silence around you took over as his steps became muffled and finally disappeared. it killed you, knowing how he will do anything to check on you.
squeezing his hand, you reminded him you were there but it was too late.
the silence killed him like how it killed you. the last few minutes, hours of walking, you were responsive, always humming to his stories and attentively listened.
but step by step, he felt you slipping until the feeling that he was only talking to a wall took over.
it was funny, how he never thought of you not listening to him. you were always there to laugh at his jokes, hum a small tune and even add to the false stories you tell of the village's children.
so you slowly slipping away from him had hurt him as much as how he had lost you.
and so, he made his mistake.
he looked back only to find your eyes slowly overflowed with tears, a sad smile on your face. you had felt his hold on your fingers loosened, his hand slightly wavering since he had turned around.
he can sense your annoyance but also the sadness and the feeling of hope being crushed.
but he can sense it. no, he can see it. the tinge of bitterness and the love and gratitude in your blind eyes. he can smell your ever intoxicating scent from where he stood even if you can't smell it yourself. he can feel your touch tremble and your fingers turn cold again.
"no. im sorry. no-"
he stopped begging as you cupped his cheek, pressing your cold lips on his. it was soft, lingering. a reminder and a promise.
it was as if to say that you'll come back for him, no matter when it will happen.
and just like that you were gone from his fingertips, the ghost of your touch haunting him forever as if morning dew & fog lingered on the tips of his outstretched hand, the bitter taste of yet another mistake filling his palate as he climbed out of the exit of the underworld, the spring rain welcoming him back to reality.
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footer: i originally made this for a valentine series but thought against it👽 reblogs are much appreciated!
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