#but i'm at the bookstore mooching off free books bc books are so expensive ðŸ˜
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i'm reading scattered words by rainbow rowell and the short stories are written so well i'm gonna devour this book and write the fluffiest shit i've ever written in my life
#i kid u not i feel like sinking my teeth into this book#but i'm at the bookstore mooching off free books bc books are so expensive ðŸ˜#a lot of the time when i write romance while listening to taylor swift it kinda feels unreal#like it feels like something that would happen irl#i'm trying to write romance like daily life romance#would happen irl kind of love#but i've never been in any romantic relationship?#i say i wanna write the would happen irl kind of love but i got nothing rn#maybe im just feeling emotional bc i've been feeling kinda isolated from my friends since i went to uni#and it's kinda lonely#bc i have issues making friends and forming solid attachments#✨trust issues✨ we love to see it#i actually do not have a single friend in uni i would invite to hang out with outside of school hours#is adulting supposed to be this lonely#oh my god i'm actually projectile vomiting my own personal feelings all over jay whenever i write his perspective.#the intense desire for companionship#vs the fear of opening up to people bc as much as you say you don't fear being cringey you fear being cringed at
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