#but i know that if i had went into it blind goddamn it woulda fucked me up sm more

[cyberwhumper]

  “Would you believe me…if I told you…ain’t my first time gettin’ tied to a post like this?”

        Rex doesn’t bother to respond. Montez, for some reason, takes this as a cue to keep going.

        “Know you seen the scars on my back.” He huffs a laugh that’s more of a wheeze. “Never said nothin’ about ‘em, though.”

        “Figure it’s your business. Never been much o’ the curious type myself.” Rex’s throat burns when he finally speaks, raw from heat and dust and yelling.

        “Yeah, well. M’bored. Might as well…tell ya.”

        Leave it to the kid to get bored at a time like this. Rex hears the creak of ropes and the rasp of fabric on leather as Montez shifts, ineffectually trying to take some pressure off his bound legs—his bum knee, Rex remembers absently. Must be hurting him something fierce.

        “Had this gal for a while, like you do. Outside…Lubbock, think it was? Few years back.” Rex rolls his salt-dry eyes. Montez talks like he’s a fuckin’ old-timer. Damn kid can’t be more than twenty. “Her daddy was a granger, right. None too keen on his baby girl runnin’ around with the likes of me.”

“Can’t imagine the fuck why.” If Rex had a drop of moisture left in him, he’d spit. Ain’t decent, how Montez carries himself. Talks about this shit like he’s proud. Gets Rex heated.

Another weak laugh, this one turning into a cough. “Just ‘cuz you ugly as homemade sin, lobo…but he catches us, right. In the hayloft. She’s screamin’, he’s cussin’, I’m just tryin’ to get my goddamned pants back on…he musta got a cheap shot in on me or somethin’, ‘cuz I woke up huggin’ a hitching post, sin ropa, mouth full of my own goddamn belt.”

“Shoulda told ‘em this story earlier,” Rex grunts. “Maybe they woulda gotten the idea to gag you and I could have some goddamn peace.” A few winged shadows flicker above them. Buzzards. Fan-fucking-tastic.

“Cabron.” Montez coughs, then picks up his thread again, quieter now. “Went at me with a stockwhip. Lost count after two dozen.”

“Jesus.”

“Yeah.”

The shadows overhead thicken. Rex is almost grateful for the split-seconds of relief as the birds block out the sun; the posse had ripped the shirt right off his back in the tussle, and his skin feels fit to burst with burning. He blinks, lids gritty. The horizon is wavering, but if it’s from the heat shimmering off the rocks or his eyes boiling like eggs in his skull, he can’t say.

“So how’d you get out?” he finally asks, in spite of himself. “Get us out this same way now, eh?”

Montez doesn’t respond. Rex glances over at him, and the peace he had wished for suddenly feels a bit sour. The kid’s head is hanging limp, glints of white visible under his heavy lashes, just like the bone Rex can see at the center of the gash in his brow. His whole face is gray-pale, mucked by oozing blood, too sun-poisoned to properly flow, and the nasty whistle to his breath is the only tell that he’s still above snakes. Rex’s dizzy heartbeat picks up for reasons he’s not entirely sure of. Bastard. Montez ought to know he’s not allowed to die until Rex collects his bounty.

The first buzzard lands near his boot, cocking its ugly pink head at him. Impatient little bugger.

“You’re early,” Rex growls.

The buzzard doesn’t seem to care.

[Fic by the exceptionally talented @bxtterflystxtches , who I have the honor of collaborating with for this event. Please show him some love!]

[OC INDEX]

COMMISSIONS ARE OPEN!

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[jooniperhun]

The End of the Rainbow | ot7 (1)

pairing: tall!black!reader x bts, poc!reader x bts, woc!reader x bts, black!reader x bts

genre: fluff, strangers to friends to (maybe) lovers [later], romance [later], comedy, misunderstandings [later], (slight) angst [later], smut (maybe??) [later], idol!au

rating: PG-14

wc: 2.3k

warnings: swearing

notes: the boys won’t make an appearance until chapter 2 but there is some foreshadowing in there (hint hint); pretend that corona never happened; most of the geographical locations/distances will either be made up or not named because I’ve never been to Korea lol whoops; this reads more like a reader-insert sorry that’s my default writing setting; and the boys’ backstories and such won’t be all that accurate because I’m the author and I say so teehee :)

“Text like this is spoken in Korean.”

“Text like this is spoken in English.”

summary: Your current job as a travelling housesitter has taken you to many places, some strange and many wonderful. When the acquisition of a new client takes you to Korea for three months, you wonder if your self-esteem can survive being around so many other-worldly looking people. Also, not to be paranoid or anything, but maybeperhaps you’re being stalked by the same seven strangers? They’re pretty loud and always surrounded by a tonne of people, so you write it off the first few times.

But this shit is getting excessive, chile. And annoying…

Rhetorical question, but what lies at the end of a rainbow? You hope that it’s a pot of gold, but with the way that your luck has soured, it might just be seven short(er than you), rowdy leprechauns ready to flip your world sideways…

Chapter 1: New Beginnings

Usually, when it came to social outings, ___ would go out of her way to make sure that she looked her best. Her wild mane would be tamed, her makeup would be carefully, painstakingly applied, and her clothes wouldn’t hold a single wrinkle. This, however, isn’t ‘usually’— this is an airport, and ___ currently couldn’t find it within herself to give a single, flying fuck about her appearance after the flight that she had just had. 

That isn’t to say that it was terrible— she was flying first class, for Christ’s sake! Not to mention that she didn’t have to spend a single dime on it (excluding the multiple new outfits and lashes that she purchased for herself because if she was anything, it was slightly vain). But a roughly 18 hour flight, combined with slight motion sickness? It doesn’t matter how comfortably she had dressed, or how attentive the flight attendants were, or how delicious the food was— ___ walked off of the landing strip probably looking exactly as she felt (read: terrible). 

Luckily, the good thing about airports was that she wasn’t the only one. No one paid her any mind, too worried about themselves and finding their respective luggages and families to be giving some rando more than a passing glance. 

She was officially in Seoul, South Korea, and she couldn’t read a damn thing.

Okay— slight exaggeration. Most of the signs had English (and Spanish, and Chinese, and Japanese) translations beneath the larger blocks of Korean, but her damn near-blind ass missed that the first time around. 

The airport looked as airports tended to look— large, modern, and clean. There was a beautiful netting of glass in the ceiling that let gentle rays of sunlight in. The walls were similarly comprised of the netting design and slanted outwards, away from all of the passengers. Statues and abstract constructions divided the masses. People from all walks of life milled around, looking for their luggage or anxiously waiting for their plane to arrive.

Incheon International Airport, Terminal One, Flight DL27. ___ reminded herself over and over of the number of where she would go for Baggage Claim, scanning the area and mumbling slightly to herself. She adjusted her dark shades and hefted her purse (her only carry-on) higher onto her shoulders, following the crush of fellow passengers into the depths of the fragile looking place. 

There were a lot of people walking around with black facemasks and shades on, so she was glad that she wasn’t the only shady-looking sista walking around. Inwardly snorting at her own pun, ___ nearly walked past her destination. 

It was honestly this part of each trip that gave her the most anxiety— that is, waiting for her suitcase to come around on the conveyor belt.

She had heard and read multiple horror stories about too many passengers never recovering their luggage. Either stolen, lost, or dropped from the airplane itself— if it could go wrong, it went wrong. But it’s not like hers’ is particularly interesting to look at. It was a simple, standard black. Only a red, knotted ribbon tied around the handle marked it as her own.

Ten minutes of fretful bag checking later, ___ finally found it. She gave a silent sigh of relief and turned towards the exit. Then, her anxiety flared right back up when she realized that she would have to hail a taxi to get to her destination. 

Honestly, her people-meter was getting a little bit too full for her to actually be initiating direct human interaction right now. 

But she would persevere! Even if her persistence could use a bit of work, she’s faked confidence enough times to make it. 

Getting a taxi to stop for her was like pulling teeth. By the time that she had stuffed her menial baggage into the trunk and clambered into the front seat, her temper had risen a few notches. She’s had a long two days. The flight wasn’t kind on her stomach or her sleep schedule— not to mention the fact that she felt disgusting. A shower sounded so nice right now… She didn’t want to be on the streets any longer than she had to be, dammit!

Donning her ‘Customer Service’ voice (as she liked to call it), she politely rattled off her destination to the driver in Korean. He was on the younger side for the profession (at least, from what she’s seen), with neatly laid dark hair and slightly tanned skin. His dark eyes constantly shifted from the road to her when they were stopped for traffic, but he luckily seemed to sense her mood as he did not say anything more than the polite initial greeting. 

All in all, it was a 30 minute drive filled with determinedly unawkward silence. ___ sent a quick text to her employer to inform them that she would be at the house in a bit, then sent another to her mother to let her know that she touched down safely. Almost immediately, her phone began to buzz.

Rolling her eyes, ___ answered. “Good morning to you too, Ma.” She said as her full lips tilted up in amusement. Upon hearing the English, the driver sent another glance in her direction.

“Hey, baby! It’s night time for us right now (we just got finished eating dinner). How was your flight?” Her mother’s voice gave a slightly tinny echo as she spoke, and the sound of shifting fabric clued ___ in to the fact that she, indeed, was probably on the toilet.

“Tiring. I forgot to buy Dramamine, so it was a fun time for me.” She switched hands with her phone so that she could look out of her window more comfortably. Little snatches of the city flashed by before they turned into a slightly more residential area. The houses here were large and gated, yet closely located. “How is everyone doing? No-one dead yet, right?”

Her mother snorted. “Yet is correct. Turns out, ya’ sister got herself a lil boyfriend—” ___ had to stifle her laugh before she gave herself away, “— and ya’ daddy wasn’t too happy when he found out. Her fast ass is sitting in her room right now, phone taken and everything. Woulda’ gotten an ass whoopin if we found anything triflin’ in it, but she’s clean.” Yeah, only because of her advice. No sending nudes back and forth, no secret folders dedicated to trifling shit, and no conversations going further than normal teen-girl gossip. Those were her three cardinal rules to sneaking around with a boy, and it seems that her little sister had done well to heed them.

“And the lil’ boy? Anyone we know?” ___ asked, playing along. If her parents found out she already knew about him, her ass would be grass, too. 

“Yes!” Ma exclaimed frustratedly. The driver jumped at the sudden loud sound in the otherwise silent car. “That nigga, Devin. Lives a block down from us? You know the one.” She gave the appropriate gasp at the news while rolling her eyes. Devin was a sweet boy who had a good future ahead of himself. There was no goddamn way she would waste her painstakingly gathered advice on someone who wasn’t good for her sister.

“Dam— I mean, wow. You think you know the people you live around...” She caught herself quickly before she cursed. Even halfway across the world, her fear of her ma’s wrath was still very, very healthy.

“I heard that, but I’ll let it slide this time.” Her mother’s tone was amused despite her previous outrage. 

“Anyways, as I was saying… I don’t see anything wrong with Devin. He was a nice boy, last time I talked to him.” From the cover of her shades, ___ watched the driver watch her from the corner of his eye. The car began to slow.

“Tell that to ya’ daddy. He—” Ma began to rant as ___ pulled the phone away from her ear. 

“How much do I owe you?” She asked quietly, hands dropping to rummage through her purse for her wallet as she cradled the phone between her ear and her shoulder. “—Alright, Ma. Imma have to call you back. We just pulled up to the house and I gotta get situated.”

Handing the driver the appropriate amount of Won, they both left the car to remove her luggage from his trunk. “Okay, sweetie. Love you! Call me again when you get settled in.” Her mother echoed as she mouthed a quick ‘Thank you,’ with a shallow bow.

“Gotcha. Love you, too! Bye.” She hung up and grabbed the handle of her suitcase, making it extend before dragging it behind her towards the house that they had stopped in front of.

She couldn’t really see anything past the high, brick walls and iron gate. Spotting an intercom, she quickly checked her reflection in her phone’s camera before she could press the button to call her employer.

Removing her silk head-scarf, she found that her high puff had held up reliably under it. She quickly stuffed it into her purse and pulled out her glasses case to place her shades in. Shoving that back in, too, she smoothed out her black jeans and checked for stains on her yellow top. It was only after assuring that her face was, indeed, clean that she rang the buzzer.

A red light blinked on before a voice answered. So there was a security camera for surveillance? Good. “Good morning! You must be ___, right?” Her voice was smooth and low, like velvet. It hinted towards an older age, especially when compared to the commonly high pitched tones of the youth.

“Yes, good morning.” ____ stepped back slightly to bow. The gate unlocked with a soft click, and she made her way up the driveway. She could only see one car at the moment, but from the size of the house— no, mansion—, she was sure that a lot more were probably in the garages (yes, plural).

The mansion was a modern white with a lot of windows to let in natural light. The lawn was cleanly cut and the rich, emerald grass shined with small droplets of morning dew. There was actually a surprising amount of yard space, which was ideal for pets and children. The only thing that she would be needing to worry about this trip was a dog and some plants, though.

Little solar-powered lights lined the walkway that ___ walked down. They looked nothing like the one-dollar versions from the Dollar Store, and definitely cost a lot more, too. She climbed a few stone steps to reach the porch. On either side of a dark-wooded door, two gold vases stood guard. They were almost as tall as her and intricately carved with little, delicate flowers. The welcome mat that she stood upon was a sensible dark brown and had a looping Welcome swirled across the front in white. 

She rang the doorbell and patiently waited.

A few moments passed before the door sprung open. The lady that answered was small and adorable in her old age. Her dark hair was sprinkled with white streaks, and her large, dark eyes were creased with laugh lines. The same lines were also wrinkled around her mouth, but they did not take away from the traditional beauty that she still held. Her cheeks were rounded and scattered with pink, and her skin was the color of milk. She was dressed in a fashionable black pantsuit and wore black pumps that boosted her height. 

“Good morning!” ___ bowed lowly with a sweet smile. Her eyes, large and slightly too round to truly be almond shaped, disappeared into crescents. With her face transformed so cutely by just a single smile, one would find it hard to believe that ___ had a mean, mean resting bitch face that, when combined with her not inconsiderable height, gave her a naturally intimidating demeanor.

Endeared, the woman bowed back. “Please, come in.” She invited, stepping aside and letting ___ and her suitcase drag in. 

***

She was still getting situated in the guest room when the door slowly creaked open.

Though she couldn’t see anything from where she was seated on the bed, the tell-tale pattern of claws clicking against the hardwood floor cued her in to who was entering— Mickey, a cute, little Shih-Tzu breed with floppy ears and a brown and white coloring. Despite the fact that he was male, Mickey had two tiny, powder-blue bows woven around his ears. His matching sweater creased slightly as he padded towards her.

“Hi, sweetie!” ___ cooed, reaching down to give him a gentle pat on the head, “Are you looking for some company now that Grandma isn’t in?” 

Mickey had been (surprisingly) very calm upon his introduction towards ___. He barely reacted (outside of a few weak wags of his fluffy tail) to her squealings of how cute he was. Perhaps it was behavior that he was used to.

He settled down onto the carpet next to her bed, the ideal spot for her to reach down and pet him if she wanted to. It was a good move on his part, because that was exactly what she wanted to do. 

___ was a huge dog lover— in fact, she just loved cute, fluffy animals in general. Cats, llamas, sheep— you name it. She tolerated reptiles, and if she had to handle insects, it was usually with gloves and a healthy bit of distance. 

The moral of the story is that she adored fur-babies, and until Mickey’s owner came to pick him up or his Grandma came back home, Mickey was her dog.

a/n: Thank you all for reading the first chapter! I really hope you liked it. The fun stuff starts next chapter, so please stay tuned! I have so much planned *evil laughter*

[jessemccowbae]

🔪

🔪- A memory about a dangerous situation

[[ CW for graphic violence and bloody injury under the read more. ]]

“Deadlock, huh?”

The comment came over Jesse’s shoulder with an audible sneer. He looked up from his scotch, his surprise completely absent from his face. He was halfway to goddamn Salt Lake – who the hell around here even knew who those scrub fucks he’d grown up with were?

“Not hardly,” he grumbled. “Fell in with ‘em when I was a kid. Got out in a hurry. Where you from that you know of ‘em?”

The stranger’s lips curled into a smirk that didn’t reach his eyes. “Around.”

“Well, if they’re operatin’ this far north, they’re clearly gettin’ on just fine without me.” His mind spun briefly, acclimating to the new information. If they were operating this far north, he needed to get the entire hell out of town. He took another sip of his drink. “No hard feelings, I knew a few good guys in there. Just work better on my own.”

It was as bald-faced a lie as he’d ever spun in his life; the few superiors he’d had in Deadlock had sent him and the few ‘good guys’ he’d had on a suicide mission, with the dual intent of baiting out Blackwatch and getting rid of the upstart crack-shot kid who could have come for their jobs at any second. They’d gotten shut down with extreme prejudice, and he’d been so spitting angry at the betrayal that he sold them all out to stay out of prison without a moment’s regret.

It was the biggest blow the gang had ever taken; the consequent busts crippled them for nearly a decade. The last he’d heard, twenty years later, he was still a no-questions-asked, kill-on-sight target. It was the only thing that had kept him from going home after Overwatch collapsed. ‘Hard feelings’ didn’t even begin.

The stranger laughed derisively, and a chill shot through Jesse’s veins. Yeah, he needed to get out of town yesterday. “Fair enough,” he said, turning back to his own drink. Jesse nodded briefly, and nursed his scotch just long enough to make it look like he wasn’t turning tail and gunning for the nearest horizon, before doing precisely that.

It was still in the wee hours when he got back to the shitty hotel he’d crashed at, shoved the few things he’d bothered unpacking back into his bag, left enough cash to generously cover his stay on the nightstand, and headed out. He was halfway to the train station – a couple of old-fashioned slow freighters came through every night that he could probably catch without too much trouble – when a booming voice interrupted him from a side alley.

“Jesse goddamned McCree.”

He kept walking. The dramatic stop and turn shit was straight out of the movies. No reason to set the bastard’s shot up for him.

There was no shot; he was grabbed by the shoulders, and as soon as he spun around to swing, tackled by the legs by someone else. He hit the ground unceremoniously, and his arms were immediately jerked behind him. He snapped his head up, trying to get an eye on – fuck, there were at least six guys, count on Deadlock to be the only outfit on earth that didn’t underestimate him – and then he felt a needle plunge into the side of his neck.

Well, shit.

—

When he came to, they were far enough outside of town that he couldn’t see it anymore, and his arms were tied securely behind him.

“Ol’ man McCree,” somebody sneered, tutting and shaking his head, walking around to face him – nobody he recognized; he’d been out far too long. He could sense the rest of them still crowded around behind him. Odds said the stranger from the bar was among them, or else had tipped them off to curry favor. “Never took you for the nostalgic type, but here you are still flyin’ our colors after all these years.”

“Soap that strong’s expensive,” he barked back, gritting his teeth. “Look, I ain’t no threat to you jackasses anymore. You all know what happened, I’m on the lam from every government on the planet, I ain’t had a decent night’s sleep in two years and odds are I never will again. Y’all want me to suffer, I’m already there, and you know damn well none of you can call in that bounty the feds got on me.”

He wasn’t sure where all the words were coming from, why he still felt any drive to escape with his life. He’d been the walking dead since the shutdown, ambling from place to place, taking whatever work would keep him fed and not grate on his conscience too much, nothing left to drive him on but the most base human instinct to continue living. Hell, if he’d been able to specify who the reward money went to, he’d have turned himself in by now. Forty million was the least he could do for the family he’d walked away from… what was left of it, at least.

The man in front of him just laughed low in his throat, shaking his head. “Don’t that just figure,” he growled, grabbing Jesse by the front of the shirt and hauling him to his feet. “You still think this is about you.”

Right. That was why he was arguing. Because these fucktrucks didn’t deserve the satisfaction of killing him.

The first punch came from behind, the next from the front, the third was a kick to the side, and the rest quickly became a blur. Definitely the most thorough ass-kicking he’d ever gotten in his life. He did what he could to block shots, to minimize the damage, but their only threshold for being ‘done’ was that he got too weak to fight back, so struggling would only prolong it.

There was blood dripping into both of his eyes by the time they slowed down. He was definitely soundly concussed, had several broken ribs, something he couldn’t identify was seriously wrong with his right shoulder, and his knees were finally giving out from under him.

The ringleader stepped up, making a show out of pulling a pocketknife slowly from his belt. For the first time since Overwatch fell, Jesse could feel tears pricking at the back of his eyes. This was it, then. Everything he’d overcome, everything he’d been given, all the trust that had been put in him… and this was all it came to. Bleeding out slowly in this same shitty desert by the hand of this same shitty gang.

The eastern sky was beginning to lighten, the stars fading into the twilight. Maybe he’d at least get to see one more desert sunrise first.

“You know,” the man drawled, kneeling next to him, “the plan here was to slit your throat and leave your ass for the coyotes. Woulda been nice and simple. But you…” He reached back, cutting off the ropes around Jesse’s wrists, then pushed him back and knelt hard on his chest. “Your showboatin’ ass just had to change my mind.”

He grabbed Jesse’s left arm, wrenching it upwards, a near-lecherous grin spreading across his face. “There’s a whole lot of other arteries you can bleed to death from, you know.”

By the time Jesse’s muddled mind managed to make the connection, the blade was already sinking into his forearm, just below his elbow. It didn’t even occur to him to try not to react – the blood-curdling scream shot straight from his nerves to his lungs, bypassing his brain entirely. He sawed in deep, nearly to the bone, before turning the knife and sliding it down. Jesse’s mind wasn’t even processing the pain anymore; he was nothing but nerve endings and reactions, shrieking himself hoarse, tears streaming down his face. The pain didn’t end so much as change once the work was done, a grotesque mass of skin and muscle falling into the rivers of blood with a sickening, wet noise.

If they said or did anything else, he didn’t notice; all his other senses had shut down in the wake of the blinding pain. By the time he could even properly look around, they were all gone.

The pain definitely wasn’t gone, but it had gotten so intense that his brain seemed to be muting it somehow. He blinked slowly, taking a few deep breaths, glancing at the softly lightening sky and around at the horizon. The town he’d been in was just south of the mountains, so they must have gone south out of town. It was situated on the west side of the interstate, which ran on to the southeast.

If he walked towards the sunrise…

He hadn’t been Angie’s favorite field medic for nothing. It wasn’t anything you could rightly call a tourniquet, but he managed to wrap his serape as tightly as he could around his arm and clutch it against his chest with his other hand, keeping as much pressure on it as he could manage. The ground lurched under him the first couple of times he tried to stand up, but slowly, surely, he got to his feet.

It was slow going, the world swimming before his eyes, his legs threatening to give every step of the way. He stopped for a long moment to slouch against a rock, gasping for breath.

I didn’t let you die for that shitty ink the first time around, vaquero. You better not die for it now.

“Who the fuck said your grouchy old ass could haunt me, fuck off,” he growled, a bit startled by the sound of his own voice, and continued walking.

The brightening navy blue of the sky was streaking with pink and gold by the time he reached the interstate. His serape was more blood than cloth now, still dripping onto the dusty ground as he dropped to his knees next to a mile marker, leaning heavily against the metal post. Just had to stay upright enough for some passing driver to recognize he was human. Or at least a body. He’d done what he could. Lady Luck would have to handle the rest on her own.

—

The headlights just barely woke him.

“–even alive? I can’t – oh holy shit, his arm–”“Alex, what’s going–”“No no no don’t look, it’s awful – just, get in the backseat with the kids and pull up directions to a hospital!”

[a-panda-reads-act-omega]

ACT OMEGA PART 8

THE 24/10/16 UPDATE

Woow, another liveblog from your favorite act omega liveblogger. Are there any other livebloggers out there i need to know.  So yeah, here we are with part 8! Big Vriska number for the win. Also only two updates away from double digits! Yeah, I’m not sure I thought this through with the whole update-update format, this might take a L OT of posts to get caught up. Luckily, I have no problem with making a fuckton of posts. Anyways, I think we left off with the kids, so lets hurry up and get back to them!

(Cant post the image. Here’s the link. http://mspfanventures.com/?s=16414&p=47)

GASP, IS thIS SOME MULTIPLE CHOICE SHIT? Well considering I’m forever going to be staying chronological, I suppose I should start with the one on the next page! 

A CHARACTER SELECTION MENU appears through the power of NON-LINEAR STORYTELLING. You know the drill by now, have some free will! Or just go in this order, if you think agency is overrated

ONE | TWO | THREE | FOUR | FIVE

Oh, that’s helpful. Great, I’ll start with ONE then.

The fact that you are a dedicated and loyal reader is obvious and indisputable, so of course you won’t be moving on ahead without having taken a gander at all of the options presented to you.

Obviously! what kinda brainless CHUMP would move on without you explicitly stating to? NOT ME.

Anyways, starting with ONE.

PFt, woah their eyes. 

KANAYA: (Hey) ROXY: oh heeeeey! KANAYA: (Hey To You Again Except Slightly More Quietly) ROXY: (oh sorry)

It seems they gotta be quiet for reasons. H  m m M..

ROXY: (why r we whispering) KANAYA: (I Am Not Entirely Sure)

So they just need to be miss zuipPer lips for no reason then?

KANAYA: (That Just Seems To Be What Everyone Has Lapsed Into Doing) KANAYA: (And Now Speaking In A Normal Volume Will Draw More Attention Than Desired Especially When Attempting To Have A Private Conversation) ROXY: (im lovin this private convo already but you might need to make it snappy)

so everybodys just whispering? do they all got SECRETS? Also, what’s the hurry Roxy?

ROXY: (john looks about ready to get down n dirty with some srs leadership biz)

Oh yeah.

KANAYA: (Alright Then I Will Attempt To Be Brief) KANAYA: (I Wanted To Thank You Again) KANAYA: (For The Matriorb Certainly)

Alright cool! It seems that this Kanaya does remember Roxy giving her the good ol’ matriorb. 

KANAYA: (But Additionally For Everything Else You Have Accomplished Today) KANAYA: (I Know Being The One To Strike The Final Blow Against Our Shared Enemy In The Midst Of Battle Does Not Necessarily Warrant Gratitude But I Thought It Might Be Nice For You To Hear That What You Did Was Appreciated)

What she DID, was prove herself to be a goddamn BADASS. But honestly everybody here’s a badass one way or another. 

KANAYA: (At Least By Me) KANAYA: (On Behalf Of My Species As Well As All Those Who Suffered At The Behest Of The Condesce) KANAYA: (And All Those That May Now Be Born And Live Free Of Tyranny) KANAYA: (You Did Good)

Pft, nice. “Ya did good, kid.” 

ROXY: (omg i am cri)

goddammit these lines always manage to be fucking perfect.

ROXY: (that wasnt brief @ all but twas so so bootiful) ROXY: (gdi cmere moms big loveable space gf)

OK this doesn’t need to be stated, but I fucking love roxy.

KANAYA: (Um I Would Prefer It If We Saved The Hug For Later Maybe) ROXY: (aww ok thats cool)

nO FUCKING HUG NOW

KANAYA: (Anyway I Have Only Just Met You But You Have Already Proven Yourself To Be Just As Extraordinary An Individual As Your...) KANAYA: (Uh) KANAYA: (Rose)

Nice Kanaya.

ROXY: (as my rose?) KANAYA: (Yes Your Rose) ROXY: (;D)

ITS CONFIRMED, Rose is Roxy’s Rose. this conversation is so cute.

See you’re still over there TZ. Whatcha lookin at? The uh... oh youre blind. what are you doing terezi?? come on girl, celebrate!

ROXY: (okay looks like john got distracted by somethin) ROXY: (so since we got a little more time to chat it up) ROXY: (and so long as were exchangin bomb as FUCK felicitations) ROXY: (youre not so shabby yourself yknow) ROXY: (like damn i was absolutely right youre one deadly customer)

Yeah no fuckin kidding, this girl knows how to kick ass.

ROXY: (seeing u whip out that BEASTLY CHAINSAW) ROXY: (was a sight to behold)

PFt, that was nothing. You should have seen when she single handedly put three of the most dangerous characters on the meteor out of commision. 

KANAYA: (I Really Did Not Do All That Much Surprisingly) KANAYA: (Or Perhaps Unsurprisingly) KANAYA: (I Am Not Sure If I Was Erring On The Side Of Caution After All) KANAYA: (Out Of Consideration For The Gift You Gave Me) KANAYA: (Or If Perhaps I Was Simply Unpracticed)

Well yeah, she didnt do as much in this battle as the others.  But like she said, she had the matriorb to keep safe. PLUS, she wasnt godtier. So yeah Kanaya, you’re excused from doing your makeup during the final epic battle.

ROXY: (who cares??) ROXY: (we WON) ROXY: (gave that witch what was COMING TO HER) ROXY: (and thats the end of that no point gettin our knickers all in a twist over it no more)

Roxy’s got the right idea. There doesn’t gotta be any more “proving yourself.” You did the battle, and you came out on top!  JUst be done with it.

KANAYA: (Yes I Suppose Youre Right) KANAYA: (Though I Do Wonder How Things Might Have Gone If I Had Attempted To Dust Off One Of The Old Fraymotifs)

Oh shit, Kanaya’s got fraymotifs? And also, you can use fraymotifs without being godtier?

oh. wait. terezi isnt godtier is she? Yeah, you totally can use fraymotifs without godtier.

ROXY: (no kidding!) ROXY: (yeah that woulda been pretty badass) ROXY: (we could have had a sick combo) ROXY: (void and...) ROXY: (uh) KANAYA: (Space) ROXY: (right yeah space)

Well too bad you’ll never have the opportunity to USE that sick deadly combo!

I am ONE HUNDRED percent sure that will be the case

i am SO SURE

nobody has to die anymore

so

completely sure.

KANAYA: (It May Have Indeed Been Sick But Upon Further Reflection Perhaps Not)

No kanaya, it would be SUPER fuckin badass dont even give me that shit.

ROXY: (wait rly) ROXY: (how come?) KANAYA: (I Dont Feel Like I Ever Got The Opportunity To Truly Get In Touch With My Aspect Like You) KANAYA: (It Has Never Seemed Pertinent That I Be Able To Cast Some Sort Of Spacey Enchantment) KANAYA: (In Fact I Have Yet To Stumble Across A Scenario I Could Not Handle Through More Traditional Methods) ROXY: (u mean a deadly body slam full a sharp metal teeth twice the length of your head) KANAYA: (Yes Precisely) KANAYA: (That Tends To Cover The Bases Pretty Well)

WELL, Chainsaws do seem to cover many different issues. Mainly the ones which involve somebody needing to be cut the fuck in half. But I dont know if being “In touch” with your aspect was ever really a thing. I mean, when did John become “in touch” with his aspect? He just sorta got the powers and did shit with them. i dont really know what that has to do with it- wait a goddamn second. People always associate the wind aspect with like independence and shit, right? And.. the last thing that happened before John went godtier, was a choice. Given to him by Vriska, who for the first time decided to step back and let him decide what to do on his own. Whether or not she would have owned up to what she said about letting him decide how to fall asleep, he still made the choice and went with it on is own. So maybe that’s got something to do with it.

Or maybe I’m just an idiot.

ROXY: (well you know what thats cool) ROXY: (u do u) ROXY: (besides) ROXY: (hopefully there wont be any more reason for you to wreck shit)

GOddammit stop saying shit like that

KANAYA: (That Would Be Ideal I Suppose) KANAYA: (However It Is Always Wise To Be Prepared) KANAYA: (Just In Case) ROXY: (ofc!) ROXY: (and hey) ROXY: (just cuz we won the game doesnt mean there wont be any more opportunities to like) ROXY: (explore yourself and your aspect) ROXY: (our cool powers are too friggin handy for them to just stop bein relevant once we walk thru a magic door)

SPeaking of which, can THEY HURRY UP AND WALK THROUGH THE MAGIC FUCKING DOOR YET IM GETTING ANXIOUS.

ROXY: (maybe someday youll get the chance to blitz ur chakras and get spacey w it) ROXY: (and itll be at your own pace instead of having to rush it for the sake of fixing some giant spacetastrophe) KANAYA: (That Does Sound Nice)

YES IT DOES NOW HURRY UP THROUGH THE DOOR SO THAT BECOMES A REALITY COME THE FUCK ON JOHN

KANAYA: (Considering Right Now I Am Very Unsure Of How To Even Begin Blitzing Those Particular Chakras) ROXY: (i bet u can ask john) ROXY: (hes rly good at givin advice for stuff like that)

YES HE IS BUT HE ISNT GOOD AT OPENING DOORS AAAAA

ROXY: (tho he probably doesnt even know it pffff) KANAYA: (You Are Also Very Good At Giving Advice) KANAYA: (That Was Not Necessarily A Request I Simply Thought I Should Point That Out) ROXY: (TOO BAD youre gettin some anyway ;P) ROXY: (rly tho ive hardly even begun to wrestle my voidy powers into submission) ROXY: (still got a loooooong way to go on that front) ROXY: (but thus far most of my blitzing has just been like) ROXY: (being around the thing) ROXY: (and letting myself embrace this like) ROXY: (natural synergy i got going w it) KANAYA: (When You Say) KANAYA: (The Thing) KANAYA: (Do You Mean Nothing) KANAYA: (Considering Your Aspect Presides Over Literal Nothingness)

Yes Kanaya, this is exactly what she means.

ROXY: (pffft) ROXY: (yes thats what i mean :p) KANAYA: (Okay I Was Just Attempting To Clarify) KANAYA: (How Does One Surround Themselves With The Concept Of Nonexistence) ROXY: (i dunno!) ROXY: (when u put it that way it does sound pretty mind bending) ROXY: (i guess ive just been lucky?) ROXY: (or maybe the nothing is naturally attracted to me and lucks got nothin to do w it)

WELL YEAh, what isnt naturally attracted to you? Guys i just really love roxy help

ROXY: (but yeah i got that voidy ring @ one point) ROXY: (and when john started getting to fixing the timeline he took me to a place that felt like) ROXY: (the nothingest nothing to ever unexist) KANAYA: (That Sounds Interesting) KANAYA: (What Was It Like)

Probably nothing.

THATS a cool panel right there.

ROXY: (well it was) ROXY: (white) ROXY: (but not pure white) ROXY: (just slightly off) ROXY: (and) ROXY: (it was super vast) ROXY: (but not like regular outer space where you can actually see stuff like stars stretch on and on til you cant see it anymore) ROXY: (which at least gives u a sense of distance) ROXY: (but instead it was almost claustrophobic) ROXY: (cuz there was nothing there) ROXY: (you and all the other somethings just completely enveloped by a shrink wrap o absence)

HUmm.. thats pretty interesting to say the least. Not really sure what to think of it though! Just pretty nifty.

KANAYA: (Hmmmm) ROXY: (never really tried putting this into words) ROXY: (i think the thing about it was that the void sort of) ROXY: (changed) ROXY: (depending on how i chose to perceive it) ROXY: (cause the whole point is that its kinda like) ROXY: (idk) ROXY: (maybe a little like binary) KANAYA: (Binary?)

too bad sollux is dead he’d get a kick outta this.

did anybody make this connection. computer hacker guy who likes two’s. Binary. man. i feel like everybody did.

ROXY: (yknow binary) ROXY: (computer language) ROXY: (0011101100101001)

TRANSLATOr HELP

“;)“

omfg she just winked in binary.

KANAYA: (Oh That) ROXY: (the way that works is basically) ROXY: (you have a bit) ROXY: (like a computery bit) ROXY: (and it can say either 0 or 1) ROXY: (and dependin on which it is the computer displays the info differently) ROXY: (but the void is like a completely blank bit) ROXY: (there isnt a 0 or a 1 written on the bit yet but thats all were programmed to understand yknow) ROXY: (like 0 is technically nothing but whats important is that theres something there for you to see) ROXY: (but what im gettin at is that really void is just blank space waiting to be written on) ROXY: (by somebody like yours truly) ROXY: (im the computer and youre the person reading the display)

Oh. That’s pretty cool and shit. 

OH shes gettin all magicky here

ROXY: (and my whole voidy thing) ROXY: (is that i gotta figure out the code for whatever i wanna make exist) ROXY: (and write it on the blank bits) ROXY: (then) ROXY: (i snatch em outta the void!)

Oh AGAIN. YEAh, roxys power seems a lot cooler now.

ROXY: (yoink!!!)

*gasp*

nice lipstick yo

Kanaya is so fucking cute oml. She looks kinda dumbfounded by this lipstick.

KANAYA: (Wow) KANAYA: (That Was Really Quite Insightful Roxy) KANAYA: (I Think I Am Already Beginning To Understand Things Better) KANAYA: (But What Is This) ROXY: (p sure its lipstick!) ROXY: (and its 4 u) ROXY: (i dont rly know if pinks ur color but) ROXY: (here it is anyway!)

Oh god help me im already starting to ship it.

KANAYA: (Another Gift) KANAYA: (Why) ROXY: (daaaaw i dunno) ROXY: (i mean its actually kinda cool i was able to make this at all) ROXY: (i bet it must be bc of you somehow) ROXY: (you like lipstick right?) KANAYA: (Yes) ROXY: (i dont know if this is just me but i bet this is totes a thing w space players) ROXY: (like i get the vibe that u guys r more in touch with the objects around you) ROXY: (specially the ones thatre important to you) KANAYA: (I Suppose...)

HMm.. Interesting bit of aspect analysis. That could possibly be a thing.

ROXY: (well?) ROXY: (ru gonna take it or what) KANAYA: (I Really Cant Accept This) KANAYA: (I Was Attempting To Alleviate The Debt Of Gratitude I Have Already Been Accumulating Towards You) KANAYA: (A Measly Thank You Is Hardly Enough) KANAYA: (And Yet You Present Me With Even More To Be Thankful For)

COme on Kanaya dont be like that. Just take the thing and be hAPPY! you dont gotta prove yourself for a gift.

ROXY: (man thats not how this works) ROXY: (you dont owe me nothin) ROXY: (but heck if it makes u feel better) ROXY: (the space egg wasnt rly 4 u it was 4 all the little trollings that need to be born) ROXY: (skewering the batterwitch was definitely 4 me and earth and stuff) ROXY: (and the lipstick is to thank u for takin such good care of my mom :D)

Dont you mean your Rose?

KANAYA: (... That Does Make Me Feel Slightly Better) ROXY: (so youll take it??) KANAYA: (Okay) ROXY: (hella) KANAYA: (Thank You) KANAYA: (Again) ROXY: (dont mention it!)

She will likely mention this many times.

WEll that was the end for their interaction I suppose, so it seems like we get one page of another interaction then? I guess Dirk and Jake.

Ohp, yep. Jeez they look awkward.

DIRK: (... So.) JAKE: (...) DIRK: (...) DIRK: (That was some fight, huh.)

Goddammit this is awkward. 

JAKE: (Oh yes that sure was a doozy of a brawl we all just participated in.) JAKE: (Or rather multiple brawls.) DIRK: (I think you’re probably up to speed on exactly how well mine went.) JAKE: (Um.) JAKE: (Should i be?) DIRK: (Nevermind.)

Just another beheading of good ol’ Dirk. Seems like that’s a common thing for him. 

((OhOFOHSANSIJFN  HOLY SHIT I PRESSED A BUTTON AND FOR A SECOND I THOUGHT I ALMOST DELETED EVERYTHING I WROTE DAMMIT TUMBLR GIVE ME WARNINGS))

JAKE: (Sorry... its just difficult to, uh...) DIRK: (Don’t be sorry. It doesn’t actually matter.) JAKE: (The important part is you won right?) DIRK: (Yeah...) DIRK: (How did yours go?) DIRK: (If you feel like sharing, that is.) JAKE: (Oh i won too!) DIRK: (Well. Obviously.) DIRK: (I meant... like.) DIRK: (Specifically, HOW you won.) DIRK: (I’d be down to hear some details of all the kickassery you've been dishing out.) DIRK: (That must've been pretty crazy solo.)

Come ONNNN guys, quit dancing around the topic here. Somethings bothering you and its making everything shitty.

JAKE: (Oh.) JAKE: (Well i wasnt alone for long actually.) JAKE: (In fact it was quite the clusterfuck of skeletons sprites and green goblin brutes!) JAKE: (That crabby troll fellow even showed up at one point.) JAKE: (He seemed to be having a difficult time with one of the tinier rascals but i was up to my ears in fracas and fisticuffs myself and couldnt really lend him a hand.)

Dammit Karkat. I love him, but god he’s adorably pathetic in fights.

DIRK: (It looks like he’s alright, so no harm done.) DIRK: (How many of those green dudes were there again?) JAKE: (Im fairly certain there were 14.) DIRK: (And you trounced all of them?) JAKE: (Actually k...carat dealt with one of them i think.) JAKE: (They were small but a decidedly tricky foe. It was scurrying around so fast i dont think a single one of my bullets even grazed it!)

He has ALLLL the luck Jake, ALL of it!  Honestly, can we get a Vriska/Clover battle?

DIRK: (Well, shit. Sounds tough.) DIRK: (Still, my score reads "Jake: 13, Goblins: 0".) DIRK: (Oh, and I’m pretty sure the name you’re looking for is Karkat.) JAKE: (Is that so?) DIRK: (Yup.) JAKE: (My mistake then...) DIRK: (Don’t worry about it.)

Dammit Jake, don’t be so fucking hard on yourself. I feel bad for him now. Like, he’s beating himself up over not knowing a complete strangers name.

JAKE: (Have you spoken to him at all yet?) DIRK: (Nah.) JAKE: (Would you like to?) DIRK: (I guess? Sure.) DIRK: (He and Dave seem to be in the middle of something, though. No point in interrupting.) DIRK: (Besides, I’m talking to you right now.) JAKE: (...) DIRK: (...)

(...)

Alright dammit, I guess we’ll see if they get over whatever’s bugging them in the next update, because that’s the last page. Seeya next time and whatnot folks.

[singingintothevoid]

Memory Prompts:  Siren (Pt. 1)

🌈- A memory about when they first fell in love

“The first time?  Must have been about fifteen, I think?”  She scratched her head.  “Was about two years before the ravagers came through, yeah.  There was this Fili’ion, a beautiful bright orange, who Gram saved from the sale block.  I think it was the two mouth thing that caught my interest first, ‘cause they would sing my favorite songs, in harmony, or mushed all together.  They said it was ‘cause it made me smile, and no one had really tried to do that since I had been dropped off.  Gram wasn’t mean, but she had other things to do than try to keep a buncha orphans smilin’.  But anyway, their name was Rouched, and they were damn sweet.  Best friend I had in there, couldn’t help but love ‘em.  Don’t think they loved me like that, but it’s alright.  I was happy to take anything I could get.  Besides,” a grin crossed her face, and she elbowed the man next to her.  “Made it so I was used to waitin’, eh?”

🌋- A memory about their first heartbreak

“Heartbreak?”  She laughed, hollowly.  “Had to be when my parents told me they didn’t want me, and dumped me in an orphanage, because I was an abomination, wouldn’t it?  That was fun...”  A swirl of ink left her mouth as she whistled, whisking the bottle of booze that was making its way around the circle.  A few chugs to protests later, she passed it on, and continued.  “You know that feeling yo get, when you’ve done something exciting, and want to show your parents, ‘cause you just wanted them to be proud of you?  Yeah, it didn’t go too well.  I found I could make these little critters, and they could pick things up, and I thought it was so cool, ‘cause I had never seen anyone else do it, yeah?  Like I had seen dancers, they made wisps ‘n shit.  But hey, on my home planet, making touchable stuff obviously meant I was gonna kill everyone, and needed to be disposed of.  All that excitement got turned into bein’ locked in a room, and hustled off to be left cryin’ in an empty room, nameless, with the damn orphans feeling sorry for me.  You know your shit’s fucked when the people with dead parents look at ya an’ think ‘at least I’m not her’!”  She stomped to her feet, grabbing her own bottle from the cooler.  “Fuckin’ A man, why would you make me think of this shit again.”  She took a long pull before adding, rather morosely, “The irony is I would never have killed anyone if they hadn’t left me there, yeah?  Them leavin’ me there made it so I wound up here.”

🏠- A memory about their childhood home/where they used to live

“Oh man, if I could go back to my home planet?  Ah, it was beautiful.  You know how people say, ‘ah, I’m gonna retire to a tropical resort planet’?  They’d go to Esorta.  At least where I was born, it was just...  Warm water, so much life.  Beaches that went forever down the coast, tall trees with their green branches sproutin’ up from the water, so it was all in shade, which was good, yeah.  We burn easily, too light skinned for most places.”  She flapped her arm, the skin on it quite pale indeed.  “But you’d get this glorious ripple pattern of light comin’ through, which would catch the algae growin’ in there and turn th’ water this lilacy color...”  Her smile was wistful.  “We lived on the beaches, in these, like, cave systems.  Ya could reach most others just by walking through ‘em.  Felt like the spaceships do, honestly.  Everything connected, which was good, yeah, ‘cause we got storms a lot, and ya couldn’t get outside when there’s hurricane goin’.  I mean you could, I guess, but it was a dumb idea, man.  But the trees...  They never budged.  Maybe the storms just felt stronger when I was so teeny...  I always would wanna go play in ‘em.  Bet my parents wish they had let me, when it came out what I could do...”  Her face fell, fingers tangling in her hair.  “Woulda saved them the shame.”

📷- A memory that comes with a picture they have

“This one was great, yeah.”  She waved the long strip, smiling slightly.  “We had found this thing in a junkyard, don’t remember what we were doin’ there, but Peter called it a “photobooth”, and it apparently still worked. We crammed in there, him ‘n me, and this button made it all flashy, and we got this string of pictures, just some goofy shit.  Apparently you’re supposed to make dumb faces, he said he and ‘is momma did it before.  Look, this last one here, where Yondu stuck his head in, is my favorite.  Look at our faces!”  She giggled, her hand pressed against her lips.  “We look so startled, he managed to sneak up on us real good.  He popped his head in, yelling about how we had to leave ‘n shit, and we were so not expecting it.  Man, it was an easier time...”  Her smile turned sad.  “Now Peter’s this big hotshot an’ all, got so little time for his old family.  Proud of him, of course.  But I miss him...”

💡- A memory that comes with an object or keepsake they have

There was a snort.  “We ain’t got space on this ship for keepsakes, not with all the damn animals people keep bringin’ on!  You know we got a cow in the ship dock?  Like, there wasn’t any space left, but it was blind so Theoric felt sorry for the stupid thing.  You know what don’t move outta the way of space ships?  Blind cows, that’s what.  You gotta be so careful parkin’ in here, like it isn’t even deaf!  Just blind!  You’d THINK it would move, but apparently its goddamn self preservation was linked to it’s fuckin’ eyesight!  ...What?  Shut up, maybe the cow’s a keepsake, dickhead.”

🔪- A memory about a dangerous situation

“Kiddo, I’ve been a mercenary for almost forty years.  There’s a lot to pull from.”  She tapped her chin with her nails, thoughtfully.  “One of the jobs would be boring, honestly.  Like, there’s only so many ways it can go.  You go shoot at people, so ya get shot at, or ya try to keep others from gettin’ shot at, so people shoot at you instead, or ya break in the steal their shit, and they shoot at you.  Sometimes we try to keep things from being stolen by people who will come on in shootin’ at ya.  I’ve been shot at a lot, it doesn’t feel dangerous anymore, ya know?  Hmmm...  Oh!”  Siren’s face brightened.  “How ‘bout this?  Spackle wanted to go to this safari thing, yeah?  Like a zoo, but like, everything runs ‘round like it’s hot shit and owns the place.” “Oh boss, no, please!”  Spackle groaned, falling backward with her hands over her eyes.  Siren laughed. “Nope, shut up!  I’m telling this one.  Anyway,”  her grin got wider as she continued.  “So we go, yeah?  And they take our weapons, because there’s been an issue with poaching, ‘cause some of these fuckers are rare and some shit, and we, well.  We don’t look like high society, right?  Yeah, so we go in, and there’s all these wild things struttin’ around, and since we’re in this buggie, it’s all cool.  Well, turns out this glaxi had managed to break perimeter, and smelled Spackle.  What’s a glaxi?  It’s this giant ass dog-type thing, with a few extra legs, a mouth on it’s belly, and four tails that it grabs shit with.  Also, they’re ‘bout thirty feet tall too, so it can be some scary ass shit.  Anyway, they hate Ykonases, which is what Spackle is.  Kinda a long time competitor sorta thing, Ykonases are smarter and faster, but glaxi are giant dumb animals that eat everything they come across.  So this buggie we’re in, it’s like, maybe up to its knees?  The first ones anyway.  Holy shit, I almost pissed myself to see this thing come blasting over the hills.  Spackle is screaming, Lash is laughing, I’m just angry as fuck that we left the damn weaponry back at the ranger station.  So we turn, and just fucking floor it.  This stupid little thing, it gets maybe fifty miles an hour?  Nothin compared to the glaxi.  And it’s not that damn stable, so we hit this bump, right?  We hit it far faster than this thing is meant to, and it flips.  We all go tumbling, spilled out of the car, and Spackle just takes off.  She’s running before I get my hair out of my eyes, and the big ol’ thing just goes right after her.  Me ‘n Lash are stuck sittin’ there like “what the fuck is goin on?”  Though, Spack is our friend ‘n all, and we can’t just leave her to get eaten-” “Love you too Boss Lady.” “So we go on after.  And Spackle, I have no idea how she managed it, but she got so far up this damn giant tree near the station that it can’t reach her.  She’s up there, hissing and spitting at it, fur all on end, and it’s paying no attention to all the rangers tryin’ to shoot it down, cause it’s not supposed to fuckin’ be there.  We hurry on over, Lash pulls out one of the guns he had kept hidden, and I get my dragons goin’, and we eventually get this thing down for the count.  But the whole time, it didn’t seem to give a shit about anyone but tryin’ to eat Spackle, who has forgotten she had some of Dave’s grenades in the pockets she had for once!  All it would have taken was a good one tossed down it’s throat to kill it.” “I hate this story.”  Spackle muttered, her tail drooped over her eyes.

🎈- A memory about a time they were safe and relaxed

“Never happened.”  It was muttered around a mouthful of food.  “Seriously, what part of ‘merc for forty years’ did you not get the first time?” “Any real answer isn’t going to be PG-13 for you, kid.”  Shine had an even worse stage whisper than Lash, and Siren chucked a roll at her.  Shine dodged, grinning, as Siren sighed.   “Even in a safe place, these nerves don’t fuckin’ relax.  Closest might have been right after I left the ravagers, when I switched ships so I knew there was no chance of them findin’ me.  I went lookin’ for an ocean planet, just to see what it would be like.  Spent almost a month just bumin’ around, no jobs, no fightin’, no nothin’.  I did have to hunt for my food, but that involved a lotta fishin in this gorgeous lagoon type place...  Gods above, I need to go back there.  Now that I don’t have the fear of a giant ass ship crashin’ into my head.” “Wouldn’t have been as much to worry about if you hadn’t stolen part of it, girl.”   

📔- A memory from a journal/diary entry

“Yeah, never kept one.”  An eyeroll.  “Where would I have kept it that it wouldn’t have been found?  No one I’ve ever been around has a respect for privacy.  I can’t even shower without some asshole walkin’ into the bathroom to take a piss, there’s no way I’m putting my inner most thoughts anywhere anyone but me can get to them.”

📝- A memory of them getting to know/meeting my muse

“What do I remember?  Jeez, I remember fishing your dumbass out of the engine, that’s what I remember.  Your poor dad was freakin out, and you could tell that wasn’t something he was used to fuckin’ doing.  More blood than I like seein’ on kids, so it was a bit uncomfortable, but not nearly as much as I was used to seein’, so it evened out a bit.  What?  Kid, you might technically be older than me, but you look like twelve, and that’s all I give a fuck about.”

🔗- A memory about their proposal/wedding

“Kinda personal, ain’tcha.  I ain’t married, and I’ve never been proposed to.  The fuck would the point be?  I live on a space ship.  In space.  Who’s gonna acknowledge it?  Who’s gonna care?  It doesn’t mean anything anyway.  I don’t hold assets that government would be able to hold for a spouse anyway.  Everyone knows he takes control of the ship if I die anyway.  ...Well, if he asked, I’d say yes, ‘cause that means it meant something to the old fuck, but it’s not like it would change shit. ...Kid shut the fuck up, I am not blushing.  I don’t blush.  You’re an asshole, goodbye.”

[fictionfailures]

Love Sick by Flowez - Summary and Chapter One

RR: Hey, hey! Good morning, evening, and afternoon! Welcome to Love Sick, kiddos, written by the lovely Flowez! They’ve got a few works up, and a… prologue… to this, but the prologue is unnecessary and one chapter long. It’s - look, I’m gonna be honest, this fic is a guilty pleasure. It’s not quite… My Immortal or It’s My Life! bad, but… Don’t get your hopes too high. I only enjoy reading this because it makes me laugh off my hope in humanity.

RR: Anyhow~!  Joining me for this, and hopefully regularly, is the ever- lovely AK.

AK: Hey there! I’m gonna be honest, this fanfic got me thinking deeply… on lots and lots of things… mainly asking myself how Flowez could keep writing it, some things just aren’t meant to be! Not saying my writing is anything spectacular, but… sometimes you read this and you wonder. Anyway, have fun! If you can.

Summary

Despair, that's the only thing they could feel. Timeline after timeline, they had to watch as Sans and Toriel got together. They always forgot about her. They didn't care that Frisk was madly in love with Sans. Though, the human was tired of it. They wanted everyone to know how they felt. They wanted everyone to see the pain they were in. Frisk wanted to claim Sans as their own.

Frisk hated being ignored.

She was going to make sure she got attention.

RR: And in the worst way possible. GAH. Be prepared for 1NS4N17Y and badfic. So much badfic. Then again, this wouldn’t be here if it weren’t bad. Still.

AK: This is already so messed up. I mean, I thought ‘they’ are Frisk? But then the author introduces that Frisk was madly in love with Sans?! My head hurts already. And now Frisk is a she. *sighs*

RR: Also, friendly warning: there’s gonna be pedophilliac undertones later. Lots of swearing, probably from us.

AK: So hide your kids and pop your popcorn, keep it sealed, this is gonna be a bumpy ride!

   The beginning

Timeline after timeline, you were forced to watch as Sans left you. He never even gave you a chance. Every timeline he had chased after Toriel. Your mother! you watch with hate in your heart as the two kissed, like they did everytime they saw each other.

RR: Every time is two words. Why would an adult give a small child a chance at dating. Why. And yes, your mother.

AK: He’s your father in this, child, cool it!

RR: Nah, that’s Asgore. Sans is just trying to be daddio.

AK: Well he fails miserably already

Their kissing had been getting more intense. Their relationship was getting stronger! You began hating your own mother.

AK: I had no idea that’s what relationships do.

RR: It’s almost like they’re going steady.

A small inhale of air was greatly needed. You began to calm down. There were a few people that actually attempted to make you feel better. Even if Toriel and Sans weren't considered friends, you still had many others. Even the king supported you! He missed having a family. He wanted Toriel back and he wanted you as his daughter. When he told you that, your heart pounded. It was a perfect image. A happy family.

RR: … why would your heart pound at the thought of being in a perfect family? With excitement? That doesn’t seem quite right… And honestly, child, have you tried being happy for those two??? Christ. You little brat.

If that were the case, you wouldn't want to murder your mother.

RR: … Our protagonist!

No matter what happened, though, the skeleton and the goat only seemed to get closer. There was only one time when Sans had broken it up with her. It was a month ago. Papyrus had told you that you deserved a happy ending with Sans.

AK: Papyrus?! What the hell is PAPYRUS doing telling you that?! NO. Not at all

RR: Papyrus is simply too innocent to understand pedophilia. He is, according to the tags, “a bean”.

A smile had graced you features.

AK: you, features, you have been graced with this slutty smile. Help.

RR: *snorts* Slutty. Too early for that, and it’s directed at Papyrus. She saves that for Sans, remember?

AK: Surprised she can keep it to herself for so long.

Papyrus was so nice and you were glad to have a friend like him.

He had went to talk to Sans and insisted that the two would never speak again if Sans continued to date Toriel. If was obvious, Sans was pissed at Papyrus. It was also obvious that Sans would do anything for Papyrus. So he broke up with her.

RR: Sans had a right to be pissed! Goddamn, the out of character is killing me… If anything, Papyrus would try and find the middle ground - he wants to be friends with everyone, and if push came to shove, he’d pick his brother. And the grammar here. ‘Had went’ would be better as ‘had gone’ or just ‘went’, ‘If was obvious, …’ should be ‘It was obvious that Sans…’,  and the last sentence could’ve just as easily been added to the previous with a comma. ‘... anything for Papyrus, so…’

They got back together the next week.

RR: Shame it didn’t end the fic.

"What a pitiful failure."

AK: This badfic is starting to make sense finally! Good job, Chara - I think.

RR: Who even knows if this is Chara.  For all we know, Frisk is hearing voices.

She had squirmed her way back into his heart. She told puns whenever she could. She made extra pie and even snuck ketchup into the recipe. She didn't even care that it had made you sick.

AK: Maybe you should try chloroform next. Also who the hell is who?! Tell me that!

RR: … Did - did Toriel even know you got sick? What out-of-character witch is this?! Goat-Mom would never!

After that night, you moved in with Asgore. He was really nice and always listened to your opinion. You started calling him dad and stopped calling Toriel mother.

AK: Such angst, at least give the goat mom a chance.

RR: What blasphemy do you speak of?! She stole Sans from Frisk!

She was still nice but it hurt your soul thinking about her and Sans.

You Loved him.

RR: Did you mean LOVEd?

The two were blind about it.

RR: Yeah, the thing about most parental figures - or those that would like to be parental figures - is that they tend to view affections as platonic because it’s otherwise inappropriate and should not be encouraged.

Everyone seen it but them!

AK: Everyone done did seen it but him! Isn’t that the way it always goes?

RR: *sniff, sniff* I smell cli~che.

Today, Sans called. Your breathing hitched as your heart began to beat at a fast pace. Sans was calling you!

AK: He’s calling to ask how he mysteriously got your number on his phone.

RR: “paps got me a phone, who’s this?”

It took you a few seconds to respond due to a lump forming in your throat.

"H-Hi, Sans! Watcha doing?" Fuck, you didn't want to sound so desperate! The sudden need to impress him formed. Stop being such a loser.

AK: Never have I thought saying the words “Hi, [name]! Whatcha Doing?” would sound desperate… then again this Frisk has some major social issues.

RR: Was… was it the stutter? AK, help me out here, why is that desperate? Did she yell it? I’m so confused.

AK: No, see, it was her actively trying to keep her clothing on while she said it.

RR: Oh my god. You’re terrible.

"Oh, this will be quite interesting." You ignored that small voice in the back of your head.

RR: Just a generic voice, probably hearing things. Seriously, are we supposed to know this is Chara at this point in time, or just think Frisk is bonkers?

Though, you couldn't. Every thought about Sans had always made your heart flutter within your small chest.

AK: Maybe that’s why he doesn’t like you, hmm? Eheheh

RR: … stop.

AK: Just getting into the same mindset of this character~

The skeleton chuckled over the phone. A smile formed on your face at the beautiful sound. He was happy.

RR: I never woulda guessed!

Why was he? You scream from within your mind as you thought of the possibility of Sans being happy to talk to you.

RR: He’s not. He’s happy you’re so far away that he has to call.

"Tibia honest, kiddo. I was calling to see if you want to go to Toriel's. She said she was starting to miss you and she doesn't understand why ya suddenly left to live with Asgore."

AK: HAH! Hah.. ha.. Ha, get it? He made a - haha pun.. Wow.. that was good...

RR: Would’ve worked better with Tibia-nest, because tibia already has the start of honest. And, patella the truth, you’re gonna get really sick of his puns. They aren’t that humerus. In fact, a few are downright inskullting. They’ll wear on your bones, fast. Especially since the lovely Flowez only uses tibia, patella, and a couple others. I don’t see why she couldn’t just include femur puns if she can’t think of so many - and it’s not like Sans has to pun. Just occasionally is good.

AK: The pun is an art form, when one comes to you, you pun, you do not think of them constantly.

You couldn't tell him the truth. What would he think? Surely, he would be furious if you talked about why you moved out.

RR: … why? Why would he be furious? There’s… what?

AK: *hands up, walks away from that* Nope.

Plus, you could feel the large amount of disappointment show on your face. Your lips had scrunched up together, eyes became droopy, and even your shoulders began to Sag.

AK: That is a real 2 year old pout right there, no wonder Sans thinks of you as a child of his!

RR: ohgodkillitwithfire.

He did not call for you, Toriel told him to call me.

RR: Oh. Is this first person now?

He would never call me like this, Frisk began to bite her fingernails.

RR: Th-third?!

AK: Sure has a lot of points of view, now why can’t it just have a point?

"I-I don't know if I can. I promised papa Asgore that we could do something today. We were probably going to go hiking." The lie sounded pretty good and it didn't even sound fake. You are a great liar.

AK: Okay, but how did she say it? Because that’s where all the magic comes from. Also what hiking trails?

RR: Good question! Also a question: why not just politely refuse? O-or… why is there an emphasis on Papa Asgore? (papa should be capitalized…) Is Frisk trying to rub in that Sans’ll never be her father-figure?

Sans took a deep breath, despite not having any lungs. Frisk took one also so that they could sound equally frustrated.

AK: If you don’t want people to ask questions about the skeleton, just play it off like it’s normal!

RR: Why do you want to sound frustrated. Third person again, so is the reader someone else? Help.

You could practically see him shaking his head through the phone.

"Well, Tori really wants to see you. Do you think you can reschedule?"

Anything for you Sans.

AK: Don’t trust that anything, Sans!

RR: Oh, no. Do. Just not what you ask them to do.

"Sure. Asgore will understand but I feel really bad. I promised the big guy one day and then I cancel."

You wanted Sans to think you were doing him a huge favor. You never had any real plans for the day but making him feel guilty would be the only way to make him show some compassion. You wanted Sans to show you at least something!

AK: … This section confuses me and makes my head hurt.

RR: Best I can translate, dear, is that Frisk is trying to guilt-trip Sans by lying. In doing so, they hope to attain some pity, which I guess is better than the genuine desire to hang out with you that he was expressing…?

RR: … Shit, I just confused myself.

You knew he was smiling based on his voice.

"Thanks, it means a skele-ton!"

RR: You’re not allowed to use that pun.

Click

He hung up already. There was no hesitation. He probably went to go tell Toriel that he convinced you to come over. Then, he would be awarded with a kiss.

RR: … Is - is Goat-Mom training Sans? Is that what’s happening?

AK: I think that’s called ‘normal affection’, dear. I take that back, nothing about this related to affection is normal, he’s totally training her.

It made you sick. Though, you were able to ignore the agony and moved on. You didn't want to worry Asgore. He was already going through enough with trying to make peace with the other humans. So, it would be the right thing to do.

AK: Must have been agonizing if it was so easily ignored. Aw, see she’s a good person - with morals and things!

RR: *shakes head* She’s an angsty brat, she’s had practice.

You scurried through the house. Asgore wasn't in his room, the bathroom, nor the living room. The only spot left to check was the kitchen and he was there.

AK: Surprised he didn’t just leave the fic, it’s what I would have done. Also try ‘there he was’ sounds much better.

RR: Also try a comma between kitchen and ‘and’. Just a thought.

He appeared to be cooking something. Whatever it was, it smelled absolutely delicious.

You walked in a little more so that he could spot you.

RR: … isn’t he looking at his food? Where is Frisk walking in from? Hell, what shape is the house? Where’s the description??? It’s not hard!

RR: You walked a little further into the cheery-looking kitchen, careful not to bump yourself on one of the outstretched counters. The slap of your feet on tile alerted Asgore to your presence. He turned slightly to see you, and the corners of his lips upturned in a smile.

AK: Wow, I want to just keep reading that over and over again just to get away from the next line.

"There you are! Howdy, Frisk!" His voice was cheerful as he stuck something into the oven.

At least someone was happy to see you.

AK: Oh yes, because you’re just such poor hated little thing with no old skeleton to - I am not even finishing that.

RR: I would have been forced to make you read something worse if you had.

"Hi, papa. Watcha making?"

RR: Apostrophe and ‘h’ missing from what’cha…

AK: Nah, English doesn’t matter when trying to communicate

"Just some dinner. It's going to take all day to make."

AK: What if you need the oven for breakfast or lunch? Use your large head would you?!

Good, that meant you could go see Sans. As long as you were back for dinner, Asgore would let you go see your favorite skeleton!

A bright shade of pink began to spread across your perfectly tanned face. You didn't quite mind. Your dad knew you liked Sans more than you should and he was a little flustered. He was confused by why everyone liked him so much. Though, in the end, he agreed the two of you made a good couple and he didn't say that only because he hated him and Toriel together. He meant it.

AK: A little flustered hmm? Just a little flustered that his daughter wants to get naughty with his wife’s boyfriend?! …and he agrees with it! Wow so much is wrong with this.

RR: … I can’t… It’s too early in the fic for me to be running out of wat. Seriously, does no one have any concept of age?! Sans is Toriel’s age, and Frisk is a child!  There’s not even the excuse of bullshit monster biology, children are canonically easily identifiable.

That's why you moved in. He understood you more than anyone. He knew exactly what you were going through.

AK: Why not just fall in love with him if he understands you so well, you angst ridden bitch!?

RR: Whoa, easy there. And I’m more pissed on Asgore’s behalf here. He lost his wife, but he can shove aside his upset at Sans. Et tu, Frisk?

"I'm going to go out for a bit. What time will dinner be ready?" You wished you didn't sound so innocent. Even if people thought you were,

RR: That is a perfectly normal question - what, should you ask about when you shall indulge in the feast of deadened flesh and rotting flora? I don’t get the connection.

You weren't a good person.

AK: Really?! I had no IDEA!!

RR: Shh, hon, shh. That aside… why the fuck is the comma in the previous paragraph, if this was clearly intended???

The thoughts that always swept your mind weren't normal. You were becoming obsessed with Sans and not in a good way.

RR: There’s… There’s a good way? idon’twanttoknow idon’twanttoknow

AK: Somebody find me that good way and write a decent fanfic on it.

"Alright, Frisk. Just make sure to be home before six!"

AK: “but daaad!! That’s no time to get to know anybody!!”

RR: “No, Frisk, the last time I let you do that, you were cat-fishing.”

You gave him a hug before running to leave the house. Your hand rested on the door handle before slamming it open and rushing out but you didn't make it very far.

AK: I need to learn how to slam a door open, that’s some neat stuff. Nothing like showing angst than slamming a door twice.

Smack

RR: Please tell me someone hit her.

You fell to the ground. You banged into something. What the fuck was it!? You peeked one eye open and looked up at the wall that stopped you.

AK: You banged into something? And it wasn’t Sans?! Wow.

RR: *snorts* I’m not sure we’re much better than the fic on the maturity front.

Your breathing stopped.

AK: Not for long enough, though. Sadly.

RR: Quick, Sans, you can still save yourself!

Sans.

AK: Oh wait my amazement short circuited, it was Sans, of course.

He chuckled at your clumsiness for a few seconds before extending his hand out towards you. Deja Vu. It was awkward that you counted how many times you had accepted his hand. A total of fourteen times. Each time felt better than the last.

AK: Sans, don’t be an asshole, she was coming out of the door and couldn’t see you. Yeah but that hand acceptance was a handshake… there’s a difference.

RR: We both know Frisk gets off to any kind of touch involving Sans. I doubt there’s a difference… Also, keep this in mind. I’m gonna yell a little bit later on.

So, when his boney hands touched the skin of your hand, you couldn't help but to smile and look up at him.

AK: I guess differences don’t matter when related to being turned on.

RR: Fetishes.

He tugged on you and pulled you up to your feet. You could see him clearly he was beautiful, like always.

AK: I think you mean handsome, unless he’s in his ballroom gown.

RR: Eh, no, beautiful was an older term to describe an attractive male. Not sure why Frisk is using it, but sure… Not the weirdest thing in this fic.

AK: you mean to say that Frisk is older than she acts?!

RR: The story would be thusly improved by Frisk being possibly legal, then worsened by how Frisk acts. It doesn’t get better.

His smile was real and he looked genuinely happy.

"Too bad your selfishness is going to ruin that, right? You're so obsessed you don't care what happens, as long as you end up with Sans, you don't really care if he's unhappy."

AK: Okay, Chara? Who ruined you? The Author?

RR: That’s the voice in Frisk’s head! I don’t think it’s Chara.

AK: Right, not Chara in the least.

That's not true, was the only thing you could tell yourself to stop the guilt from forming.

Sans gave you a strange glance before asking you what was wrong. You shook your head in response. You didn't want to worry him.

RR: Real descriptive.

if you told him about Chara, he would hate you! It made you wonder if he remembered your genocide route. If he did remember the whole thing, you would have to take drastic measures.

AK: Drastic measures, hey?

RR: Pfeh. “Drastic measures” my ass.

"Wanna take a shortcut, kiddo?" You nodded again. No words were able to come to mind at the moment because you were to busy staring at him to think.

AK: too* … I know, staring at somebody takes up a lot of your brain capacity.

RR: You have to get your eyes to focus right, and then processing the image, and - well, it’s a lot of work for her singular brain cell.

You wanted him all to yourself. Though, he didn't even want you, at all. The only reason he talks to you is because of Toriel and Papyrus. If it wasn't for them he probably would have killed you because you're such a fuckin sadist and a dirty brother killer!

RR: Okay. Nice of you to say. Now show me. Show. Don’t. Tell. I know it’s a staple of bad writing, but come on! And where’s the proof that he only talks to you because of Goat-Mom and the Bean?! He didn’t seem to mind talking to you earlier! And! And! If he doesn’t remember timelines, why would he kill you?! Continuity, do you have it?!

That's right, that malicious voice in your head didn't force you to kill anyone. You had gotten so pissed and so bored that you reset and took everything out on your friends. Eventually, you learned to love pain and inflicting it on there. Your dirty, rotten, cold adventure turned you into a real monster.

AK: I think they would like you better if you were an actual monster. You might have a chance with Sans!

RR: If Frisk were an actual monster, they’d be so much more pleasant to deal with. Oh, by the way~ Mini-rant incoming~

RR: Remember how many times Frisk has shaken Sans’s hand? Fourteen. Fourteen times they’ve done it, and somewhere in the middle of that, they got bored. That’s - that’s just sad. Were all the runs perfect? Did Frisk not once die, not once reset and get shoved back to the last save point? Because that’s never explained. So I’m assuming… yes. I’m not going to try and defend this Frisk. They don’t deserve it - we have zero reason to sympathize with them. And the genocide? It’s all but canon that Chara helped with that, but in this? Oh, no, that was all Frisk. They wanted the LOVE and EXP. Because they were bored of their friends and life, and pissed that Sans had the audacity to pursue someone else. Just… God, I hate this Frisk.

AK: My Bitch’dar is going crazy right now. Anybody else throw away their popcorn and run to find a toilet already?

Though, it was wrong. You were trying to change. You hadn't hurt anyone this whole timeline. Thank goodness. If Sans found out you hurt someone, he wouldn't forgive you.

RR: … I feel sick. It must be so hard to not kill anyone. Nice to know that Sans is your only reason for not doing so. Not Papyrus or Asgore, both of whom you claim to love, oh no. Just Sans.

AK: True - pffheh - True love - hahaa *snrk* Conquers a- I can’t! *cracks up*

You would break down.

Scream.

Cry

Kill.

AK: So you’d identify the problem and make it worse instead of fixing it. I knew you were a smarty!

RR: *downhill whistle and mimics an explosion*

You couldn't let him hate you, he meant way too much. It made you feel like garbage. You were so obsessed with Sans that you were becoming out of control. Almost like an animal that still needed to be tamed.

AK: … I can’t. It hurts too much.

RR: Needed to be tamed implies that you fine once. Which I call bullshit. Going feral would be better. Also presented: completely healthy relationships!

Sans started to walk forward, holding your hand. A darker shade of red formed, he didn't notice it. It would be kinda embarrassing if he did take notice of it.

AK: How do you know what he notices and doesn’t notice?! Frisk is in Sans’s head! We’re all doomed!

RR: Shhh, Frisk is omnipotent.

He squeezed tighter as he rounded the corner of the humongous house.

RR: what house? We’re in a void

Bam.

AK: WHERE’S THE GUNSHOT?! AND THE CORPSE?!

RR: IS IT OVER?!

We were at Toriel's.

RR: Damn.

Sans's magic was amazing He was amazing. You smiled at his strength.

AK: Especially that whole one HP.

That was another reason why you loved him. Not only was he funny, kind, an amazing brother, and a good friend but he was also strong enough to kill if he had too. He was strong enough to punish you.

RR: NONONONO! GODNO! NOPE, UH-UH, NOTOKAY, NOPENOPENOPE! NOPUNISHMENTSABORTABORT

AK: Honey honey, shhhh! Don’t worry! It gets worse!

RR: *whimpers* I know.

"Wow, nice shortcut, chuckles." You mentally laughed at that perfect nickname.

AK: Chuckles. Like a child naming their first dog.

RR: Real creative there, kiddo.

You could see him trying to hold back a laugh but he failed. He chuckled a bit. Not a full blown laugh but it was something.

RR: … you called him Chuckles. That’s barely worth a snort in anyone with actual humor.

"That's what you're callin me these days, kid? That pretty humerus." A classic Sans moment. It was perfect.

AK: And we’re back with puns that aren’t even worthy of a ‘you tried’.

RR: *You failed.

His joke was so bad but knowing it came from him made it so much better. If it was made by someone else you would have found it pathetic. Though, him, nothing about him could ever be pathetic.

RR: Pointing out your own flaws doesn’t make them better.

"I guess. Unless, you want me to call you Mr. Boner!"

AK: OKAY. Where’s the trash bin?! I need to visit it because I have a big delivery!

RR: *laugh-sobs* It comes up again.

"Frisk,watch your language! " Despite it being a inappropriate joke, he still thought it was funny and once again laughed but it was louder this time. You weren't sure if it was the joke or the disbelief of what you just said. You found both funny and laughed with him.

AK: “Watch your language!” As he encourages that behavior. 10/10 father figure.

RR: Do as he says, not as he does? Who am I kidding, Frisk would rather have him do her. Also, should be ‘an inappropriate joke’. That lack of an ‘n’ is inappropriate.

AK: Once again, fuck English for being so damn rulediculous - I’m sorry I saw the opportunity.

"Thanks for dealing with me, Sans."

RR: He gets paid in Toriel.

He released your hand and looked at you right into the eyes.

"No problem, kid. Nothing can get under my skin."

AK: And I almost thought it would get serious for a moment there. *sigh*

Another pun. So, that meant he was in a good mood.

"You'll probably ruin it, though. Don't deny that either."

AK: Chara, your bullshit comments have no purpose, just admit that you’re a sad throwaway character and shut up.

RR: Shh, let them pretend. This is the best we’re getting out of this chapter, and all it is, is an unnamed voice.

AK: Fine.

Stupid voice, was the only thing you responded with. It didn't reply back.

Good.

AK: WHO THE DICKENS IS WHO?!

RR: I thought we stopped asking that?

AK: Well I’m still confused!

You didn't need it ruining your day. A day with Sans. Maybe, just maybe, Today would be the day you could get between Sans and Toriel. You hoped so. Watching them further their relationship made you want to gag.

RR: Haha. Ha. You’re so sweet.

Ugh.

You would sabotage them eventually.

RR: What the fuck is wrong with this child.

AK: Bet if she got a therapist, the therapist would suicide.

For now, you just wanted to enjoy Sansy's presence.

RR: Sansy. *war flashbacks*

Nothing would ruin Today. You would make sure of that. No matter what it took.

RR: Well, must be a special holiday if the ‘t’ is capitalized that.

RR: … Wait, was that supposed to be threatening?

In order for everything to go normally, you needed to act as if you happy for them. Don't let them find out the reason behind your sudden move in with Asgore that occurred two weeks ago.

Act sweet.

Be fake.

AK: Because that works

Make them think that you're still that good girl from the first few timelines. You could never act like that naturally but you were a good actor.

If you weren't becoming a goddamn yandere, everything would have been fine. Though, you kinda were.

AK: Well at least we know she can identify the problem, however, that is a huge understatement.

RR: I… I don’t understand that second sentence. Kinda were… what? And Frisk, sweetie… *points to my favorite yanderes* You’re not even a fuckin’ drop in the barrel .

AK: I don’t think the author understood it when they wrote it.

RR: I think they have their own special subset of English.

Hiding your deep breath, you opened the front door of Toriel's house. This was your chance to prove yourself to Sans.

AK: You know I have to wonder if she ever thought about what Toriel would think of her stealing her boyfriend.

RR: You imply she thinks.

"Be good, little Frisky."

AK: I did not call for a FriskxVoiceinherhead so don’t.

RR: noooo, nonono, it’s better than SansxFrisk in this WE CAN STILL SAVE SANS

You had to be. If you wanted Sans to return the feeling you had for him, then you were going to have to prove you were worth the time and effort.

AK: OH MY GOD WE’RE DONE !! FINISHED!! I CAN GO TAKE A BATH AND FORGET!!!

RR: Haha, no we’re not. Still got some chapters to go.

AK: *sobs*

RR: *pats your head* Don’ worry, it’ll get beeeeett… um. Something. It’ll get something. Something might actually happen.

AK: Reassuring!!

RR: Do you want me to lie?