#but i hope you know i respect your opinion and that i definitely won't settle just for this

[stormyoceans]

is it just me who thinks this "riding the wave" thing is not good at all? like the plots are not giving, they are pretty lazy and only rely on the same old fixed couples they know are going to work, otherwise no one would be watching these tbh where is the quality, the good scripts, the original ideas, the talent? 😭 idk i see ppl so happy and i'm like we should aim for more actually, we deserve better than this...

im afraid we might have to agree to disagree on this matter anon im really sorry ;;;;;;;;;

i actually feel like the lack of originality and the company relying on the popularity of fixed pairings to carry the stories was way more present in both of the two parts from GMMTV 2024 combined, but with the 2025 lineup what im personally seeing is more variety and the willingness to experiment with new genres, which is something that i can't help but be very happy about

there are still students and school settings, but they're trying to put a fresh spin on it by sprinkling some fantasy elements and religious guilt on top, and the majority of the characters we've seen are actually adults with countless different jobs: there are teachers, and detectives, and shop owners, and debt collectors, and scammers, and photographers, and doctors, and fortune tellers, and flight attendants, and emergency rescuers, and im probably forgetting some because there were SO. MANY. and not only that, but we also got toxic yaoi in theatre, toxic yuri in the industry, a love triangle that maybe if we pray hard enough can turn into a polycule, a master and a servant fighting each other in the ring, an amnesiac prince, and last but not least a mafia adjacent soap opera loving perfume maker (which let me tell you. that sure is a string of words i never thought i would be putting together. and y'all see me use words recreationally on the daily)

we can't really be certain of what GMMTV means with 'riding the wave', but after seeing this line up, the way im interpreting it is that they've started to understand that people are interested in queer shows with diverse storylines, and so they're finally willing to invest in them

now, don't get me wrong, this doesn't mean that our job here is done and that im fully satisfied. on the contrary. like do i think they overused the amnesia trope and the fortune telling plot? a little bit, yeah. do i wish they had have given us more GLs considering the insane amount of engagement they are pulling? YES GOD DAMN IT. do i believe that GMMTV, as a big ass consolidated company, should be setting the trends by being bolder and experiment more instead of just following along? absolutely. but we have to start somewhere, and to me this is what it is: the beginning, not the ending point, and i personally will never stop being vocal and advocating for better quality and unique plots

all this being said, i did see people being disappointed by the amount of fixed pairings we now have and expressing doubts over this 'darker', more mature era of QLs, and i think everyone's feelings are perfectly valid, because at the end of the day we all have different tastes and different things we would like to see

so what im hoping for rn is that everyone will be able to find something to be excited about and look forward to with what we've got, and as for the future, i hope we can all keep moving forward and aim for more together

[datastate]

(sending this as an ask because it got WAYY too long to be a reply whoops) i really like your opinions on the routes!! especially on the ais waugh…. i am planning on playing kanna's routes whenever i eventually replay this summer + i am excited to see what they entail…. but yeah overall i really like your thoughts and man do i need to replay yttd T_T it has been so long. (+ this is where the reply turned into a small ramble about qtaro because the autism) plus your comment about how the main games have gone + the qtaro thing. sorry i am ill about him. glad to see someone who understands his intent there because although i am not active in fandom ANYMORE i used to see so many people absolutely hating him for that (<- like obviously not the best way of going about things but he had intentions. okay?) (also i would like to make the comment of although in 8th grade i had intense hyperfixation on alice, ever since my first playthrough in 6th grade (HOW HAS IT BEEN THAT LONG?!) qtaro has + always will be my favorite sorry society….). i still remember when 3-1b came out + so many people were like "oh maybe qtaro is not deplorable" meanwhile i was over here #1 qtaro fan sobbing. sorry this is so long

(in response to this ask! also, for my own sake, i've broken up replying this into little sections :] <3 but i don't mind at all!!!)

REPLAYING YTTD

oho...!! i do think even a general replay (without seeing other routes) is really worthwhile to get a better feel for the characters & see how you can recontextualize things they're doing/have said at the time... i love combing through to see what nao and kai were up to in particular just before the main games <3

while i do think there was more that nankidai could've stood to do to differentiate the two routes particularly to make kanna & shin's separate routes feel like an actual choice, i do think that what small things are changed are still worthwhile & cool to see! i hope you enjoy your replay!!! :D

Q-TARO

YEAH exactly... i'm really sad that it's taken until his literal death to truly appreciate him as a character when more morally ambiguous characters like... well. shin, keiji, and even kai (though i'd honestly argue that most people don't see kai for who he is, you know; rather they place emphasis on his attractive appearance...) -- what they've done & how they behave are excused because they're, frankly, thin enough to care abt.

i've gone on about this before, so i won't linger much more than i need to, but i find it so strange that most people don't seem to recognize that - if not in the moment, i can understand that everyone's emotions are in a swirl. even the player's, but in chapter two when he says he felt a connection w kai - q-taro is autistic. and this definitely makes how he approached things in the first main game all the more understandable, personally... being so blunt about it when he'd settled on it being the clear solution, he even outright says that he doesn't want to see any of them just resign themselves right away to being voted out! & then we learn in ch3 as well that he's also experienced suicidal ideation which just lends so much more value to what he says...!! he doesn't want anyone to die, but certainly not with the belief that it's the only option they had. he wants them to at least have the chance to fight, just in case. and he's willing to hold himself to the same standard!

of course, first impressions mean a lot, but i feel like people saw this and completely missed the entirety of chapter 2 where he quickly warms up to gin afterward & even apologizes to sara for all she's had to deal with, despite it not being his fault, and expressing that he wishes there was something he could do even irt miley... he cares so much abt the kids within the group, even if it takes a lot of courage to support strangers when he knows he has other kids waiting at home for him... he still tries his damnedest, you know? i feel like there's something about that you have to respect. even when he's attempting to leave, you visibly see how conflicted he is about it & it's why sara can pick up on it so early, because he doesn't want to do this, it just feels like the only option... which. well. there's something to say about how gin's the one who's freely handing out tokens and yet q-taro goes to someone like sara first. someone who's been steadily pushed into the figurehead of the group, who is clearly strategic... versus someone who resembles the people q-taro's trying to get back to. hmmm. i sure wonder what the implications are here. (& i have a post for you. that you might enjoy... i've been meaning to write it for a while but i forget. but the idea is there.)

but. yeah... they didn't give him much room to grow in their mind after this point, which is so disappointing & definitely created a very toxic space. beyond that, it played into general southern stereotypes of him being the only homophobic/transphobic one, which i honestly often find treatment of to be in poor taste (it can be used well in stories, but you shouldn't just. throw bigotry on characters simply because you hate them...) -- but also just. blatantly untrue?

even just. everything about his treatment of people in general being so understanding once you explain something to him, or his desire to be a good person worthy of looking up to (which is why it doubly wrecks him when he sees himself become disabled/suicidal in the hospital, because he's become such a rotten person and he feels it and it's a terrible, terrible cycle) for the orphanage kids & to prove something to the parents who abandoned him that he's still worthy of being loved too... he believes in equivalent exchange in social dynamics, only ever giving out what you can take, just... in what world would he be so insensitive?

and this isn't even bringing up the fact that he has slightly longer than shoulder-length hair + nonetheless treats kai/mishima with a lot of respect and care even with them both generally being considered (physically, as well as in their demeanor) strange. combined with the fact that he relates to kai on the basis of being "lonely" rather than "loved" for what's unchangeable about them... there's so much there to read into. not just with autism or ptsd, but. gestures. transgenderism, being mixed, so on. things that sara had people to help support her with prior to the death game, or that she lacked altogether (if she's fully japanese)

but i digress! i'm glad that ch3-1 skirted some hatred toward him, but i definitely agree -- he's such a well-rounded characters even prior to that & it deserved to be acknowledged...!!

[daiseukiis]

: ̗̀➛𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆

𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙞 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙮 𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙘𝙝𝙞 ?

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

─꒱ in which we peak into how jujutsu kaisen characters handle their child on a daily basis。

─꒱ feat. gojo satoru, fushiguro megumi, kugisaki nobara & itadori yuji

─꒱ warnings ; none

─꒱ notes ; suddenly i’m having jjk as parents brain rot after a night of reading megumi smut

─꒱ JJK AS PARENTS PART TWO

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

─── ➴ GOJO SATORU

꒰꒰ he’s a great dad trust me, spoils his child like no one’s business. you want the entire set of the haikyuu manga and crunchyroll premium? give him five minutes to purchase them. want front row tickets to see nct in korea? yeah, he’ll get it for them and thats plane tickets on first class

꒰꒰ but don’t get me wrong,,, he’s a doting father but sometimes it might be just too much.

꒰꒰ for starters, mans gotta know where their kid's heading on a daily basis. gotta shot him a text that heading to shibuya with your friends or taking a flight to okinawa or hokkaido. he just wants them to be safe !!

꒰꒰ expect him to text his kid almost every time he’s out buying anything. he’d be all the way in osaka, they're in class they will randomly get a text from him if they want uncle rikuro cheese cake or kuidaore taro pudding.

꒰꒰ not to mention !!! he will text you it’s an emergency and they have to call him, a matter of life or death situation. knowing he’s a shaman, he could die but there’s like a percentage of a chance that could happen, it's percentage rivals how fast he can activate his expansion domain. which isn’t much. but when they pick up the phone, he’s just gonna ask the. which top would look better or say there’s a hot deal for these sweets across the street and if they wanna go

꒰꒰ his favourite thing to do it probably embarrass his kid in front of their friends. maybe. yeah. baby pictures and all

꒰꒰ if he has a daughter his father radar is SO high. a boy gives even a glance her way, he will probably threathen them. spoils her with so much it even HURTS to look at his bank account but he's rich so ;;; takes her out shopping and half his camera roll is photos of her or selfies of them

꒰꒰ if it's a guy, he will cheer him on every time a girl confesses his love for his son. probably even gives him condoms and tips but you didn't hear that from me. with no doubt gloat to his students how amazing and manly his son is, takes him out on missions when he wants and goes sweet store hopping with him

꒰꒰ if his child returns home crying for whatever reason, a boy broke her heart or someone beat their kid up for doing the right thing;; bitch gojo is gon beat the shit outta them no cap

꒰꒰ he's the dad every teacher flirts with at parent teacher conferences, and the dad every girl in the friend with has a crush on

─── ➴ FUSHIGURO MEGUMI

꒰꒰ amazaing dad, but probably should work more on the expressing it to his kid area

꒰꒰ he won't spoil them rotten like gojo, but if he sees its something that they truly want and sees that it's of use or valuable, he will get it for them because he wants to see his kid smile

꒰꒰ he's not big on affection, probably a hug time to time and an appreciation pat on the head. if his kid falls he would just crouch down and ask if they need a hand, or is their baby girl starts crying he'll pick her up into his arms and pat his head

꒰꒰ if he has a daughter he would be reluctant to go shopping with her, but he does like the fact that his kid is smiling and showing him her outfits. he better have a say as well if there's an attire that shows to much skin, he just wants the best for his girl. if a boy looks her way with a look, he will emit an aura enough for the boy to piss his pants

꒰꒰ if his kid is a boy, you bet hes gonna teach his son to beat up half the delinquents up the area too ‼ he has so much trust in his son, they would spar sometimes and he would take him on to missions. he sucks at giving advice, probably around the words of 'just be yourself?' he won't show it but he's cheering for you

꒰꒰ he's a chill dad, if their kid ever forgets anything at home and he's off to drop it off at school, he would be a bit reluctant cuz why did they forget it to begun with, but he's gonna do it anyways <3 the one parent that everyone calls pretty

꒰꒰ he'll text his kid basic and short messages, a how's your day or do you want anything from here kinda texts when he's out on missions. he wants to be sure that you're given enough space to be yourself within his reach

꒰꒰ fushiguro screams like the type of dad that would have a family photo in his wallet. i just find that cute and UGGH yes <3

꒰꒰ if his kid comes home crying, he's going to immediately comfort them. bad test or shitty day, he's gonna be slightly awkward but he'll take them out for their favourite food or arcade

꒰꒰ he's also the typa dad that will check up on you before he goes to bed or when he comes back from a mission, when you're all asleep just to make sure you're safe

─── ➴ KUGISAKI NOBARA

꒰꒰ listen,,, listen, kugisaki is a bad bitch mother and it radiates that energy

꒰꒰ if she has a kid, she's gonna raise them to be the baddest bitch in all of tokyo, in all of japan if all i care. she gives her kids credit for even trying to beat gojo up, but if they can't she's still gonna be happy if they tell her they kicked a guy's kneecaps in for taking their lunch money

꒰꒰ a little reckless, her parenting methods are a bit questionable but like its kugisaki here, she does whatever the hell she wants. her kid falls to the ground? don't cry pussy, get up you're better than this

꒰꒰ kugisaki's that mother who probably buys take out food every friday, or takes her kids out to a mf buffet only to tell them to pay for her because she gave birth to their ungrateful asses

꒰꒰ she's the most chill mother out there, all her kids' friends probably want to be adopted by her because she's fun and knows how to kick ass

꒰꒰ if she has a daughter, definitely wants them to be famous instead of a shaman. she wants to see her kid rocking those magazines or fuckin it up in movies or j-dramas, so she got rights to stroll through the red carpet as the most beautiful mother

꒰꒰ if she has a son, definitely will end up making him into a loyal, bad boy who knows how to drink his respect women juice on a daily basis. the son who also get absolutely wrecked by his own mother in smash bros. doesn't matter how old kugisaki is, she would still be able to beat her son even if he's a first grade shaman

꒰꒰ if her kids come home crying, i bet you she'll only scold them. she'll ask why the hell you crying over this guy/girl, they're way low of the standards and are not even it. she would convince them that they're so much better (?) to make them feel good about themselves. and then she'll probably head lock the kid to crush on a better person

꒰꒰ she's the type of mother who wouldn't sit down to talk to her kid often, sometimes she also socks at communicate like fushiguro but at least she knows it. she would be the type that would comfort her kid by bring food ( typical asian parent shit tsk iykyk )

꒰꒰ she's also that type of mother when they tell her that someone makes fun of something to the point that their kid is broken by it, she will get out that car and pick at fight with the kids, and then wipe their ass on the floor, and the mop the deck with their parents

─── ➴ ITADORI YUJI

꒰꒰ this man is the personification of a fun, chill and laid-back father

꒰꒰ he would be the dad that would wake their kid up in the morning so they're not late, pack their food or bring food to their school if they forgot to bring any

꒰꒰ he doesn't really spoil his kid, but you bet he'll take them to fun places like arcades, escape rooms and even go street food binging. definitely would have a movie marathon too

꒰꒰ if he's back from a mission early and near the school his kid goes too, you bet he's going to catch them by the end of school just to walk home with them and take about his mission

꒰꒰ he's the kind of dad that wouldn't mind if they're swearing around the house, but they gotta watch their mouth still, he doesn't want them to be as bad as sailor nor does he want them picking up nasty habits

꒰꒰ if his kid is a girl, he will give her space and room for anything, be it needing some time alone after a bad test or constantly wanting to go out with her friends to get her mind off things that he might not be able to fix. he doesn't mind going shopping, definitely would give an opinion to any outfits with a thumbs up. takes pictures with his daughter on any shenanigans they do together and send them to his group chat with kugisaki and fushiguro

꒰꒰ having a boy, he would want to play sports with them and go on missions. sometimes they would go to the arcade to try the punching game to see who has the highest and then bet the lower pays for food after. he likes giving advice, even though it won't be helpful or will be, he's gonna say it either in hopes that it'll be brought up in their head in any moment they're in

꒰꒰ he's the type of dad that has a selfie of him and his kid as a lockscreen i jUST KNOW IT

꒰꒰ if his kid comes home crying he will be so worried. like whats wrong, what happened, who hurt you, does he have to punch someone?! he's going to pull them into his arms and take them out for food, maybe even a walk. he's they type to want to cheer them up no matter the situation, and probably when they're all good and dandy, he will personally talk to solve the root of the problem behind their back

꒰꒰ when there's something to be settled, i bet you that they settle it with a game of rock-paper-scissors out five ‼‼

─── ➴ SUKUNA ( BONUS )

꒰꒰ what makes you think this man wanted a child, if he did have one ; probably either got it killed during the heian era or he killed it for his superiority complex </3

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

DO NOT REPOST 、 MODIFY 、 CLAIM WORK OR LAYOUT AS YOURS.

© MGUQIIS 、 2020

[xpao-bearx]

《Original post here》

Part 2 HERE

SUMMARY: [Supernatural TWD AU] In which Negan is a kinky incubus, Rick Grimes is your secret guardian angel, and Daryl Dixon is a gruff monster/demon hunter. Three drastically different men who can only agree on one thing: making you theirs.

PAIRINGS: Reader x Negan, Reader x Rick Grimes, Reader x Daryl Dixon (Polyamorous Ships)

RATING: Mature/18+/Romance & Smut. Please be prepared and do NOT report.

NOTE: This is actually my first time ever writing an xReader story series as well as writing on Tumblr (I usually only write on Wattpad). As such, it probs won't be perfect though I would SERIOUSLY appreciate your *respectful* feedback and support!

I understand writing xReader content can get a lil tricky, so please just keep in mind that not everything Y/N says or does would be something that you'd do IRL or even approve of. Also, sometimes I may not help but put a teeny bit of myself in Y/N...

Lastly, I recently got back into the TWD fandom after a looong ass time and I'm taking a while re-watching the whole show. So I apologize in advance if my portrayal of any of the characters are rusty or I may not remember too much of the events from the show, but I promise to do my very best and hope y'all enjoy~!! \(^o^)/

DEDICATED TO: The wonderful @blccdyknuckles and @negans-attagirl 💖

"Heavenly Sins"

Part 1

The sounds of laughter and easygoing chatter filled your ears as you walked closer to the church, a light breeze blowing through your F/C floral dress and the sun blinding your eyes. It was Sunday, most residents of the small town of Alexandria having gathered for mass.

It was a day like any other; peaceful and happy, children giggling and chasing each other around as their parents socialized outside before church could start.

Your heels clacking rhythmically on the pavement, you were just about to enter the building before a familiar voice called out.

"Y/N!"

Spinning, a huge smile instantly reached your ears as you saw none other than Carl Grimes waving enthusiastically at you as he jumped out of a car. From the driver's seat, his father soon followed as he stepped out.

Rick Grimes--dedicated sheriff of this fine town. His usual uniform forgone, instead replaced with a casual navy coloured suit. His baby blues met your E/C, flashing you a bright smile of his own that rivalled the sun itself.

Carl was running towards you now, and once in front he gave you a big hug.

"Settle down, cowboy! It's as if you haven't seen me in forever." You chuckled, ruffling Carl's hair affectionately.

"That's 'cause it did feel like forever." Carl pouted, eventually letting go as he looked up at you.

Before you can reply, Rick patted Carl's head and greeted you. "Hey, Y/N. How are things?" He asked in that endearing Southern accent of his.

"Just fine." You nodded, grinning before you couldn't help but let your gaze wander around a bit. "No Judith?"

It was then that Rick's smile faltered, but just barely. You nearly didn't catch it. "No. She's with her mom."

Rick was divorced from his ex-wife, Lori, after he discovered her cheating on him with his also now ex-bestfriend Shane Walsh. After the divorce, Shane and Lori quickly moved to the neighbouring community of Woodbury together and agreed on joint custody of the kids.

It really made your blood boil; you've interacted with Lori only a few times before so you didn't really have much of an opinion on her...that is, until, you learned what had happened between her and Rick. You knew it wasn't any of your business, but you cared about Rick a lot and he sure as hell didn't deserve to get cheated on.

"Oh." Was all you could say, quite stupidly. Your cheeks reddened, mentally slapping yourself before clearing your throat. "Will I see her in the daycare tomorrow, though?" You were a daycare teacher and even though you loved all of the kids, Judith was your favourite. She was simply such a sweetheart.

Rick nodded, his smile softening. "You got it."

You couldn't continue the conversation as the bells rang, making you jump out of your skin. Carl, noticing this, laughed which made you playfully roll your eyes before slinging an arm around him as all of you went inside.

♡♡♡

You took your place near the back of the church with Carl and Rick. Once everyone was settled and done singing, the service began and Father Gabriel stood on top of the podium. A few minutes into his sermon, the interruption of a motorcycle revving loudly outside sliced through the air. Gabriel flinched in surprise, and it was obvious he was desperately trying to keep his cool. Finally, when it was silent again, you found yourself biting back a smile knowing all too well who had caused the ruckus.

It seems Rick knew, too, judging from how his jaw clenched and his hands turned into tight fists.

The doors were thrown open, making Gabriel flinch once more and some of the congregation turning in the pews to look. But poor Gabriel quickly fumbled with his Bible, raising his voice just a tad to regain their attention.

There was a low whistle accompanying the approaching footsteps, but the congregation did their damn hardest to ignore the latest visitor.

"Damn... I assumed the church would be a lot more welcoming than this." A husky voice whispered, and you at last couldn't hold back as a smile broke through.

"Negan." You whispered back, turning slightly in your seat to see he has taken the spot behind you. His leather clad arms lackadaisically resting on your chair, the musky scent of his cologne invading your senses oh so wonderfully. "Fancy seeing you here."

"What? Is it really that surprising, darlin'?" He grinned, presenting a row of perfectly straight white teeth. "I go to church."

"Not all the time." You pointed out.

"Ah..." He chuckled softly, hazel eyes twinkling. "That's 'cause Father Creepy McGee over there is just that. Creepy. As. Shit."

You bit the inside of your cheeks, suppressing your laughter. True, Gabriel did have his moments, but he wasn't that bad. That didn't change the fact that Negan knew exactly how to tickle your funny bone, though.

He was new to Alexandria. It was a lovely town, but since it was relatively small not a lot of people want to move here not unless it was families looking for their children to grow up in a safe environment. Which was why it was quite a shock to find out that a single man like Negan chose this destination, and even more so when he took everyone aback with his infamous pottymouth and rather inappropriate charisma.

He had moved just a couple of houses down from yours, and you made it your mission to befriend him. Right from the get-go, he had piqued your interest and curiousity. He was different from everyone else--even possessing an air of mystery about him--and that definitely intrigued you. And also, perhaps you were just too nice and didn't want him to feel outcasted. Although, that didn't seem like an issue to him at all.

"Want one?" You were brought back to reality when you saw Negan's hand outstretched with a pack of cigarettes.

"Dude, we're in church." You reprimanded, frowning.

Negan didn't say anything, only cocking a brow and still with that same shit-eating grin. You sighed, finally giving in as you swiftly grabbed one and stashed it away in your purse for later.

"Y/N." You turned to the left, Rick's icy gaze piercing you. "Pay attention."

"R-Right. Sorry..." You mumbled sheepishly.

Carl, who was sitting in the middle of you and Rick, had dozed off. Rick nudged him, but the brunette only groaned softly and snuggled into Rick's chest. Defeated, the sheriff sighed and was just about to listen again to Gabriel before Negan cut in.

"Rick!" Negan purposely raised his voice, knowing it would get a rise out of the other man. "Didn't even see ya there. Howdy, cowboy!"

Rick grimaced, and it looked like he was just going to ignore Negan though he knew that if he did that then Negan would just irritate him even further. "Good to see you, Negan." He forced himself to say.

"Only you can say that while giving me such a deadly side eye, Grimes." Negan snickered. "How have you been? How's the wife?"

Rick flushed, his fists in a tight ball again and it looked like his nails would be digging into his skin. You abruptly swung into action, placing a hand on Rick's own.

"Rick..." You said gently. "It's okay. Calm down."

Rick did, his shoulders drooping as if a heavy weight had been lifted. He can barely pay any attention to Gabriel now, then you suddenly stood up and grabbed Negan's arm.

"We need to talk. Now."

"What, we going for a quickie?" Negan smirked, but that soon faded when he saw your serious expression. He sighed dramatically, reaching his full height as he towered over you before following you out.

At this point, you didn't care if people saw what transpired or would even start gossiping. No one, not even Negan, was allowed to harass Rick. He has helped you through so much shit--more than you'd like to admit--and you at least owed him this much.

Once outside, next to where Negan parked his motorcycle, you exploded. "What the fuck is with you?! You leave Rick alone, or I swear to fucking Christ I will--"

"Woah, woah, woah! Hold your horses, missy!" Negan guffawed, his hands up in mock surrender. "I mean, I like 'em feisty, but goddamn! Watch your fucking language."

"Tch. You're one to talk."

"Did you just scoff at me?" He raised his brows, putting his hands in his pockets as he slowly drew closer to you. A devilish grin tugged at the corners of his mouth, tilting his head slightly. "No one's ever fucking scoffed at me and didn't regret it soon after."

You frowned, letting out a huff as you met his gaze challengingly. "As if you'd do anything to me."

He was silent for several moments before chuckling, leaning back against his motorcycle. "You're right. I have too much of a soft spot for ya." He pulled out a cigarette, lighting it then taking a drag. He drew his head upwards, puffing out the smoke. "Whaddya say we just forgive and forget? I truly am sorry. You can even tell Rick that I am metaphorically down on my goddamn knees begging for forgiveness~"

"I'm not forgiving or forgetting anything until you actually face Rick and apologize yourself." You muttered. And without another word, you spun on your heel and strutted back inside the church with your head held high.

Negan's intent stare lingered where your ass had just been, taking another long drag and letting out a small laugh to himself.

His eyes suddenly glowed a crimson red, a smirk playing on his lips.

Oh, he really did pick a GREAT one.

[pokefanbri]

1st I have to say this b4 I repeat the post from fb. This is a place where I can speak my mind freely without judgement, speak my peace even. Which is exactly what im gonna do so prepare for a read. So think what u want idc, but the last thing I wanna do is tick some1 I know off cause on some level there's a mutual appreciation & respect regardless of my impression. And anyone that reads this isn't obligated to understand my opinion & I dont expect u to. With my brain its my thought process to let information out of my head so I can put things aside, observe & absorb more lol. Writing is another tool or coping mechanism for my anxieties & other psych ailments, treatment for my mental health depends on it & other hobbies in other words, especially during shutdown, something to focus on. Heck even youtube is recommended by my doctor if it keeps me happy lol. But because ill be working again, I may not have time to do alot of things I like sadly..idk i just wouldnt want to be burnt out & focus on more important things. I have a high respect for anyone working around people during this time & it must worrisome for u too, means I have to keep on my toes as well soon..its a scary world out there for an introvert but I was killin it in NY too. It was just a slow steady process with all the limitations & moving my life up there wasn't easy to begin with but I pulled through & did it all...only for it to be taken away.

So, I'm an Irish, German, Canadian,British Mut from tucson. Maternal & paternal immidiate families lineage mixed made me, including my NY blood from my bio dad. The rest is all over Europe but u get the idea. Tucson may be where i was born & my 1st home without a father & raised not knowing (were mardi gras babies btw 😒)

But NY is & will forever be my 2nd home i dont care what any1 says, I felt I belonged there. Its the other half of me quite literally.Theres a memory that's really been bugging me. Last day b4 i left it, a bald eagle flew across my path in the sky no joke going NE & I was departing back to the SW. I chose the eagle years ago cause I identify with it. including the background symbolism in different phases of my life that included them lol, but to actually see one was just amazing.

They symbolize strength+freedom in general despite it standing for the country from sea to shining sea lol. Also Braviary was always in my pokemon team besides pikachu since its gen came out lol. I've always been strong, whether some believe it to be true or not is their problem, only I know the things I've gone through. Point is different ends of the spectrum its always been with me throughout in some way & im glad i got to share it with someone that gave me the freedom I needed.

But yea I experienced what its like to be there & got to know that part of me even if I didn't find him & maybe didnt care...I feel I was meant to be there. I was in touch with my roots, lower Temps & above sea level rather than high temps & below sea level 🤣 I loved everything about my time up there. It'll always be a part of me, & I hope to see it again. But I digress.

But in regards to the relationship itself, emphasizing on what i said b4. Just as it i got "settled" in it was gone & I had no clue what was happening without my knowledge, the whole plan to bring me back, all of it, the whole chain of events that unfolded the way it did starting with leaving a marriage in the 1st place to be with him i mean come on lol. Chasing a dream that didn't play out the way we had hoped. I took leap of faith & I ended up starting over twice in 1 year with no benefit of the doubt. I still have my ny health insurance for the rest of the yr, I have to add it to my list to apply again in az. Ive been wearing the wrong prescription glasses for 6 months under quarantine & they're just now getting to stage 4 of opening lol. Just understand how frustrating that actually is for someone like me & u totally get it 😅 U want to take care of business but sometimes you're limited & gotta work around it. had all that covered there & then was told I settled, wrong thing to say & its no wonder I didn't blow up in his face right there & then 😒. But I have retraint & can control myself. Though it was out of my hands the new relationship didn't have to go sour, been just as long if not more, could've actually thrived given the proper balance with room to grow. Idk, Sometimes I honestly don't think anyone believed in me. I mean I have no debt, no record, no kids, im a clean slate type of girl lol. Yes I did end up feeling unappreciated, underestimated, a bit neglected, insecure about my body, ashamed for being myself, & I shouldn't have to feel that way at all & if that happens there obviously something off. I just didnt know what it is he wanted & needed, i wanted to help & be a good partner to this dude but why is it bad to ask the same in return? I shouldn't have to drastically change myself to fit someones standard i know, but...i needed the old him back, I missed the old us & wanted to get back to that.. Was always so closed off & probably ended up in his own head who knows, maybe there was guilt for some of the things he did & didnt want to hurt me anymore, spare my feelings any more than it did b4 it was too late.idk whatever the excuse i still don't know what triggered it all to fail so easily & i don't think i ever will. But ending up with the conclusion that I was the problem, its narcissistic to even believe that & i won't accept it. Not when he can't confront his own issuse & put blame onto himself too.. it was a low blow & literally felt like my heart was pierced at the sound of it. If im to blame its the other way around as well. My point of view wasn't acknowledged so this is my take & experiences of happened so plz dont hate me for speaking my truth.

But yea I can tell when somethings not right & feel strong empathy for others emotions. I knew something was different, there were signs everywhere since the mistrust started & during the last half of that time with him I questioned everything but sat in my own headspace as well as he did just thinking about it. If anything we failed eachother, the blame is on us both but idk what else i could've done to get through to him. That's the stubbornness, he wouldn't budge. Despite how things went down..Leaves me to think, what was the point of having me there in the 1st place, to not follow through with our shared hopes & dreams but instead spiral into such resentment for me that the interest faded. But at the at the same time...even if it ended early for him, I didn't give up & I fought to keep us okay which it was for the most part. Hindsight is 20/20, it definitely wasn't negative all the time. In fact things were great between us & acted like goofballs together, that right there is a friend despite if the stronger feelings weren't mutual. Nobody with hate in their heart acts like that, he was good, the best, cheered me up when I was down, shared interests & did things for eachother. But that alone makes me question what was truth & what was fiction sometimes ever since the trust between us started to fade. Am I in the right to feel what im feeling right now? Im angry & upset yes very, but the kindness he had throughout..he did care in his own way...which makes things so much harder.

Tripadoodle if some way you're listening, I hope u know now where im coming from. For your own benefit & quest to be a better man like you always wanted...actually try. Head my advice. Making yourself better shouldn't be put on a womans shoulders to do for u without her getting lifted in return...its alot of weight to handle for 1 person to carry lol. Get off your ass & build on yourself, learn from everything that happened & become better for yourself & the sake of others, Because it starts with u. Go to church if possible or watch them, it really does help. Even from across the country I still want u to do just as good & help u as a friend. You promised we could remain friends & im holding my end of the bargain whether u like it or not lol it was your idea during the ride here. All I wanted in the end was to not lose u in my life completely...but i should be patient i know.. Theres more space, im not contacting u directly & respecting that, eventually ill stfu lol but I feel I need this rn. I should hate u,but I cant hate u, I do still care, u had that affect on me so much that I can't really listen to others when they say ur a douchbag lol, u were still my rock the whole time even if u didn't feel the same after a while & u did help me alot as well. I see the good in people & u are good, with well balanced snarkiness & humorous sass to boot. light a fire under ur own ass & ull be okay lol. Never stopped believing in u. Ive seen what you can do, you're very smart & know your sh*t, u will go far lol. And as a friend I'd lend u my strength if I could but the most I can do is pray for things like safety/protection, healing, forgiveness, guidance, etc. Leave it to God if u feel compelled to. Give zanabell a hug for me.

God i talk way too much 😅 No im not doing any of this for attention, I want my voice to be heard as well as a possible learning experience if it had that effect on anyone. The things we learn build character & help us understand a little more about ourselves. Probably shouldn't share cuz its nobody's business, yea ive thought of that too.. But its a blog lol, Tumblr allowed it to be that space, opinions and rants are allowed & encouraged. Nothing wrong with that 🤷‍♀️ so who gives a crap.

These are pictures of the NY sunrise & AZ sunset. Clouds always get me cuz of the shapes, used to to take pics of them all the time. once saw mario holding a hammer when I was a kid 😂 3rd & 4th pic is a split rainbow, never seen that b4...either someone found the gold or its deciding whether or not to connect. Probably was connected but I missed it lol. But then I looked behind me after the split 1 disappeared & a double rainbow was forming. Nature can be scary but also beautiful