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#but i don't know if id feel worse rooming with the floor that doesn't match my gender at all
boyplushie
·
3 years
Text
i feel so selfish but also im gonna start crying bc of this
#teddy vents
#the university i plan on going to is offering gender neutral housing for the first time EVER.
#like my first year of school is gonna be their first year of this
#& i got really excited at first
#& im on the list for it (there's a pretty low number of spots)
#but the residence hall they're using for it has no single rooms only doubles
#& it seems selfish but i was really looking forward to having my own personal dorm room. where i could be myself
#i don't want to have to spend my first year of college in a new program rooming with a complete stranger
#where the only thing we had in common was our transness.
#& i know there's a chance i would get along with whoever i end up with. but there's no guarantee!
#the housing department said i would get matched with a roommate based on the questions i answered in the housing application
#but those questions were only are you willing to live with service/support animals + do you get up early + do you stay up late
#+ are you okay/not okay with noise
#like that's not enough! i don't feel safe or comfortable enough with that
#but i don't know if id feel worse rooming with the floor that doesn't match my gender at all
#bc in my original dorm choice i was going to be living with 3 or so other girls
#we'd have our own rooms but i would still be lumped in with the wrong gender.
#i don't know. would it be worth it? what would my parents think?
#they're still helping me pay for a lot of college. they'll be there when i move in what will they think
#when they potentially see visibly trans people that i would be rooming with.
#that's a recipe for disaster right there.
#i don't know. i don't know.
#they're keeping me on the list until friday which is okay
#im gonna see my therapist tomorrow so ill talk to her then about it & what she thinks.
#i was so excited for this opportunity & now it seems like it won't even work for me.
#i just want to live in a dorm where im happy & comfortable
#damn. why did the affordable & scholarship granting school also have to be the most conservative and traditional one too
#if you read this far thanks 👍 im kinda distraught
#wish this hadn't happened in the middle of the school day im gonna be focusing on it until tomorrow's appointment now
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