#but i am worried about getting on the 'furher testing' railroad because i have NO spare energy for more medical shit right now
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#got a cardio appt in the morning that's too early to sleep before and too late not to fuck up my schedule so that's going to be fun#and im worried about it#I'm only mildly worried about there being something wrong#but i am worried about getting on the 'furher testing' railroad because i have NO spare energy for more medical shit right now#im dealing with like 3 other specialists right now AND therapy and I don't have a car#and also i just can't do more than 2 appts a month AND deal with prescription bullshit and the inevitable clinic fuckups#just that much messes me up#i do not need more#god help me if something IS wrong because I absolutely do not have the spoons or the ability to deal with interventions#or god save me '''''lifestyle changes'''''' which they offer NO material support for but for which I need material support#ugh#i want to get this checked out but it had better be nothing just like last time#im also having one of those evenings where my hands are so unsteady i can't do fine work at all#but at least i got myself into the studio for a while even if i wound up doing something else
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