#but he does also miss when it was just the two of them

[lady-griffin]

I do disagree with this or at least parts of it.

Viktor making a human error is beyond accurate though.

Despite Viktor’s claims about being “evolved” and the god-like imagery surrounding him, he’s still a flawed human; this is made especially clear when Viktor said the Z-Drive couldn’t exist as he was obviously wrong as it very much did exist and was about to explode in his face.

But I don’t think Viktor (through Warwick or some other means) not seeing Ekko because he was under the rubble makes a whole lot of sense.

If that was the case, it would’ve made more sense for only two sky tendrils to go into the Hexgates, not three, since Ekko was partially covered up by the rubble from the start.

Or even better, showing the tendril meant for Ekko overlooking him, but we're not shown that; instead, we're shown Jinx dodging a tendril and it dissipating right after it missed her.

This happens extremely fast and it’s beyond easy to miss; even I just assumed the tendril stopped existing, rather than noticed we start seeing it disappear. I mean don't get me wrong, they could've made this a lot more overt in my opinion, but it is there.

And it does make sense to me that the tendrils are "one shots" when we look at them visually; when they're coming down they slightly come apart, but not completely.

This gives the impression that they're not exactly stable forms of energy, but once they connect to someone that breakage stops completely and they become solid, stable lines.

Even though strands slightly pull away from the main tendril they don't disappear, rather they rejoin the main tendril a bit further down; so, if the main tendril no longer exists, it make sense to me we would see the strands dissipating.

Furthermore, because Viktor messed with the gravity of the Hexgates, Ekko isn’t actually hidden underneath the rubble by the time the sky tendrils come from them.

We’re even specifically shown the rubble floating off of a him a few minutes before the sky tendrils make their appearance.

So, it doesn’t make sense to me that Viktor (directly or indirectly) didn’t notice Ekko or lost track of him, as a tendril was sent for him and aside from floating a bit, he didn't move.

Also, if Ekko was only spared because Viktor didn’t "see" him, then what happened to that third tendril? Why don’t we see it continue to exist? Searching for him? Wouldn't that also imply the tendrils don't last if they don't find/reach their target?

The sky tendril missing Jinx and disintegrating right after, leading to either Viktor himself or the tendrils following some kind of “preexisting directive,” prioritizing Jinx and thus sending the one originally meant for Ekko after her makes a lot more sense based on what we're shown.

This is still Viktor making a human error, because three tendrils were sent down to the Hexgates, but only two people were connected.

Viktor either didn’t realize or care one person wasn’t connected.

Which makes sense, at that point Viktor was beyond certain of his victory and arrogant in how he “saved” humanity from itself; why would he bother to notice or care about something as insignificant as one person not being connected? How could one person stop him?

And then along came Ekko.

One of my favorite details from the finale is how three sky tendrils go into the Hexgates to take Vi, Jinx, and Ekko.

But Jinx dodges one of them.

This at first seems like a false victory, since she’s immediately grabbed by Warwick and another one just takes her.

But it’s not a false victory. The one that took Jinx was originally meant for Ekko, who was an unconscious duck at the time.

Because Jinx dodged the first sky tendril, Ekko remained disconnected from Viktor’s hivemind – which as you know, was kind of a major factor in the whole stopping the apocalypse from happening.

It’s this small, short-lived triumphant moment that seemingly doesn’t matter and yet it was essential to Ekko's major triumph in the end.

So yeah, I just really love that detail.

Also, I couldn't resist putting the flash frame of Ekko here, because my god, the art in this show is beyond amazing.

[childrenofcain-if]

That one scenario where C and MC have a kid has my heart completely 😭 Can we get a follow up for that? How are things going on in the joint household? I'm also very curious to see what C would name their kid 🤭

the hershey’s kisses glinted in the late afternoon sun, crinkled foil catching the golden light that streamed in through the window. aster sat cross-legged on the sofa, a small island of contentment in the messy sprawl of school bags and discarded socks she’d left in her wake.

she was humming under her breath as she unwrapped another piece of chocolate, oblivious to the way her shoes lay in two opposite corners of the room and how her lunchbox sat precariously balanced on the edge of the coffee table.

you leaned against the kitchen counter, sipping coffee and watching her with the detached amusement of a parent who knows they’ll have to clean up the mess but hasn’t yet summoned the energy to do so.

C was in the armchair, one foot propped on the edge of the ottoman, clicking through their macbook with half an eye on aster. it was domesticity in its sweetest form, the kind you don’t think about when you’re young and idealistic, imagining love and family like perfect polaroids on a wall.

“did you give her those?” C asked suddenly, their voice louder than the hum of the dishwasher in the kitchen.

you blinked and set your coffee down, moving closer to inspect the crumpled foil wrappers littered around aster.

“nope,” you said after a beat. “not exactly either of our flavor. that’s… what is that, cherry? we don’t have those in the house.”

C arched a brow, and without missing a beat, turned their full attention to your daughter.

“aster,” they said, voice soft but with a worried edge, “where did you get the chocolates?”

aster’s head snapped up, her chalcedony green eyes lighting up with excitement.

“felix gave them to me!” she said, her grin wide enough to show the little gap where her front tooth had fallen out last week.

C froze, their hand tightening slightly on the edge of their macbook. you, on the other hand, were far more amused.

“felix, huh?” you said, crouching slightly to meet aster’s eye level. “and who’s felix again?”

her grin grew impossibly wider as she happily declared: “my boyfriend!”

you chuckled, leaning against the arm of the sofa. “oh, really? you have a boyfriend now, kleine ster? when did this happen?”

“this morning actually!” aster exclaimed, bouncing a little on the cushions. “he gave me the chocolates at recess and said he liked me, and i said i liked him too, and now we’re boyfriend and girlfriend!”

C’s eye twitched, a muscle jumping just beneath the surface. they sat up straighter, their attention now fully honed on your seven-year-old’s revelation.

“did he now?” they said, their voice tight. “and what else did this... felix boy say?”

aster frowned, confused by the sudden shift in tone. “uh… he said i could have the last red crayon in art class.”

“generous of him,” they muttered darkly, looking distinctly unimpressed.

“C,” you said warningly, but they ignored you, leaning forward with the intense focus of someone about to conduct an interrogation.

“and does this felix… hold your hand?” they asked, their tone too casual to be actually genuine.

“sometimes,” aster admitted, her brows knitting together.

C’s mouth tightened into a thin line. “does he share his lunch with you?”

“yeah, today he gave me his oreos!”

C’s jaw twitched. you pinched the bridge of your nose.

“C,” you said again, a little louder this time. “let it go, darling. they’re just kids.”

but they were too far gone now, leaning forward as though proximity might grant them any sort of control over the situation.

“aster,” they said with all the solemnity of someone at a funeral, “you can’t have a boyfriend. you’re too young. your brain isn’t fully developed. you’ll... you’ll explode! you’ll leave your parents all alone then and it’ll make us very sad.”

aster blinked at them, unwrapping another hershey’s kiss with deliberate slowness.

“i will explode?” she asked, clearly confused by this turn of events.

you rolled your eyes. “no, you wo—”

“yes, you will,” C insisted, cutting you off. “and anyway, you’re not allowed to date anyone until you’re like 30 and paying taxes. it’s a rule.”

“that’s not a rule,” aster said with the stubborn certainty of someone who knew she was right. she really was her parents’ daughter. “and felix is a good boy.”

“‘good,’” C muttered under their breath, glaring at the imaginary felix as though he was lurking in the shadows, waiting to hand their precious little star another chocolate. “i’m going to fight this seven-year-old.”

“C!” you snapped, stepping between them and placing a hand on C’s shoulder. “calm down, my love. it’s harmless.”

C leaned back reluctantly, their gaze flicking between you and aster, who was now watching them like they’d sprouted a second head.

“fine,” they grumbled, crossing their arms over their chest.

***

after dinner, aster sat cross-legged in the middle of the living room, her brow furrowed in concentration as she examined a tiny instruction manual for building LEGOs with the intensity of someone decoding the human genome. her fingers, small but deft, picked up pieces and slotted them into place, her movements sure and deliberate.

C sat beside her, their long legs folded awkwardly beneath them, one hand bracing their bad knee. their fingers worked slower than hers, more hesitantly. the gap between them—her bright enthusiasm, their cautious quiet—was almost laughable. but C didn’t laugh.

they watched her instead.

aster had inherited their stubbornness, the precision of their thoughts, the way they spoke with certainty even when they were wrong, the hard-headed refusal to back down in the face of a challenge. but she’d also inherited your warmth, your easy charisma, the way people seemed to orbit around you like you were some kind of gravitational force.

she was both of you, but neither of you. something wholly her own. and she shone so brilliantly.

“non,” aster said suddenly, shaking her head. she spoke in a tone that was equal parts exasperated and amused, the way one might speak to a child who couldn’t quite grasp a simple concept. “that piece goes here. look.” she leaned over, plucking a flat blue brick from the pile and snapping it into place on the half-constructed spaceship.

“ah,” C said, their lips quirking into a faint smile. “of course, petite étoile. how foolish of me.”

she beamed proudly, her confidence growing with each small victory.

“it’s okay. you’re still learning,” she said magnanimously, patting their arm. honestly, it amused C greatly to see her reflect you back when you both argued everyday like your life depended on it.

C snorted, shaking their head. “merci, mademoiselle.”

“pas de problème,” she replied breezily, her accent and pronunciation impeccably like a parisian native.

C felt a pang of pride so sharp it was almost painful. french had been one of their gifts to her, a piece of their heritage they had handed down like an heirloom. and she had taken to it effortlessly, as if it had always been hers.

she slipped between languages with a grace that left C in awe, her young mind absorbing everything like a sponge.

“wat is dit?” she asked suddenly, holding up a strange piece they hadn’t encountered yet.

“hmm,” you said from where you were sprawled on the couch, your legs stretched out and a book resting on your chest. you barely looked up as you answered her in dutch, explaining what the piece was and where it might fit.

aster nodded thoughtfully, her small fingers turning the piece over as she considered its possibilities. C watched her, their heart swelling with a mixture of love and disbelief.

how could someone so small hold so much brilliance? how could she be so much more than they had ever dared to imagine for themself?

“do you think felix likes LEGOs?” aster asked suddenly, breaking their reverie. she was staring at them now, her eyes—C’s eyes, pale green and perceptive—narrowed in thought.

C felt their jaw tighten at the mention of the boy, the ghost of their earlier irritation flickering to life.

“i have no idea,” they said evenly, focusing on the spaceship.

aster tilted her head, clearly unconvinced by their tone.

“he’s nice,” she said firmly, as though this simple fact should erase all of C’s doubts.

“i’m sure he is,” C said, their tone carefully neutral.

you glanced up from your book, smirking slightly as you watched the exchange. let it go, your eyes seemed to say.

but it wasn’t that simple.

it wasn’t about this felix boy, not really. it was about aster, about the inexorable passage of time, about the impossibility of holding on to something as fragile and fleeting as childhood. she was growing up, and there was nothing C could do to stop it.

C reached for another LEGO brick, their fingers brushing against aster’s. she looked up at them, her eyes bright with curiosity.

“tu vas bien?” she asked, her voice soft and earnest.

the question caught them off guard. for a moment, they didn’t know how to respond. how could they explain the tangled mess of emotions that had been simmering inside them all day? how could they tell her that the thought of her growing up terrified them in a way they couldn’t quite articulate?

“i’m fine, petite étoile,” they said eventually, forcing a smile. “just tired.”

she seemed to accept this, turning her attention back to the spaceship. but C couldn’t help noticing the small furrow in her brow, the way her hands moved more slowly now, as if she was trying to puzzle something out.

they watched her in silence, their heart aching with a strange, bittersweet kind of love.

***

later, when the spaceship was complete and aster had been tucked into bed, C found themself sitting on the edge of your shared bed, their head in their hands.

“okay,” you said, sitting beside them. “do you want to talk about what exactly is bothering you, my love?”

they sighed, looking up at you now.

“it’s just… strange,” they said, their voice low and tired. “she’s growing up so fast. too fast. i feel like i blinked, and suddenly she’s not my little girl anymore.”

you stayed quiet, letting them find the words.

“i still remember holding her in my arms for the first time,” they continued, their voice thick with emotion. “i remember her first steps, her first word, the first time she looked at me and called out for me. and now… now she’s talking about boyfriends and whatnot.”

they let out a bitter laugh, running a hand through their hair. “i didn’t have this. a proper childhood. a father who cared. i don’t know what i’m doing half the time. i just… i look at her, and i love her so much it terrifies me. so much so that i still don’t understand how my father could—”

“hey,” you interrupted gently, placing a hand on their arm. “you’re nothing like him. you’re such a wonderful parent, C. she loves you so much. you can see it every time she looks at you. and yeah, it’s hard watching her grow up. but that’s the deal. you love them, and you let them go, little by little, so they can become who they’re meant to be.”

C nodded slowly, their eyes softening as they looked at you. “i know you’re right.”

you leaned in, pressing a kiss to their temple. “of course i’m right, i always am.”

they rolled their eyes, but a small, tired smile tugged at the corners of their mouth.

“do you think…” they hesitated, the tips of their ears turning adorably red. “do you think we should have another one?”

“another what?” you teased, raising an eyebrow.

they scowled, burying their face in your neck.

“you know what i mean,” they mumbled, their voice muffled. “don’t make me say it out loud.”

you laughed, stroking their hair. “we’ll talk about it in the morning.”

but you already knew the answer.

[avelera]

I’m curious how you think Jayce and Viktor’s romantic/sexual relationship most likely unfolded within the context of the two Arcane seasons. Do you think it would have looked something like the trajectory from Distinguished Innovators or were they just pining for each other but entirely oblivious of the other person's feelings until the very end (especially with what you said at some point about the possibility of Mel being Jayce’s first)

Hmm, so there's fanfic and canon to consider here. I think with fanfic, it can be anything the author desires.

Technically, I think the most canon-accurate romantic read of what's happening on the page is that Jayce and Viktor have feelings for each other but neither is totally aware of their feelings until Jayce has his moment staring into the fire in 2.07 when he "chooses" Viktor. Then Jayce basically confesses during their big final scene and we get a lot of hints that Viktor has felt the same way or been silently and hopelessly pining for him and now they're finally together.

But that never quite works for me because it requires a little too much "carrying the idiot ball" like... these guys spent the entire time skip between 1.03-1.04 in close quarters at all hours of the day creating Hextech together. That's before Jayce becomes the "Man of Progress" or any of that stuff and was just a regular and possibly crazy researcher who almost got banished, so it can't always be a status difference. And Jayce is so affectionate, and he falls for Mel so quickly, I really truly struggle to imagine that with no barriers to a relationship (Runeterra canonically does not have homophobia) they wouldn't have gotten together sooner if something else wasn't in the way.

So, personally, I think that they've tried to or come very close to a relationship in the past, but something prevented them from going all the way and now it's that near-miss is still there in their physicality with one another, and both might still long for it, but one of them is holding it back from happening while the other just thinks it's hopeless and I honestly think after S2 it's Viktor holding back because of his declining health, while Jayce is the one thinking he hasn't got a shot so he might as well, tragically, look elsewhere.

And I'll go into a bit more detail on why I believe that for a romantic read of these two:

(Obviously you can just go the boring old "cuz they're not romantic" but I think that's dull and reductive and presumably not why anyone is the Jayvik tag)

I also don't totally buy the idea that they hadn't figured it out yet? These are two young men in their 20s, who basically instantly connect with one another, share everything, and are openly physically affectionate with each other from the first. In my fic Distinguished Innovators there's a certain amount of shyness and the fact they're just busy to deal with but they're still young men, it's why the fic postulates a physical relationship between them that isn't exclusive or official and thus doesn't change their status as "partners".

But in fics of mine like Parley I first floated another possibility that with time I find more convincing argument: Viktor knows he doesn't have long to live, so he's resolved to keep a certain distance from Jayce and not interfere with any sort of love life he might have (even if it destroys him with jealousy) because he doesn't want Jayce to be totally destroyed by his death, which given how openly affectionate Jayce is, seems inevitable.

This one works for me increasingly because it means the characters don't need to carry the idiot ball. Viktor can have his own strong reasons for not wanting to involve Jayce in that kind of relationship and Jayce can read that Viktor doesn't want to be involved with him in that way, and maybe they even got close and he was pushed back, and he's just respecting that now because he's just happy to have his soulmate in his life in any way he can have him (which I truly sincerely believe is a canonically supported read of Jayce no matter how romantic you see their relationship).

Then the tricky thing about a disease like that is... how much time does he actually have? If it's months, he should focus on leaving a legacy, which Viktor does. If it's years, in theory, they could work on a cure for him, but what if that doesn't work? Then you run into the tragedy of the longer he lives, the more he comes to regret not being with Jayce anyway. Then there's the question of a Hextech cure. I can see Viktor resolving to himself that if he's ever cured, then he'll confess to Jayce. Which feels all but impossible at the end of S1 when Sky dies, but then in 2.08, in the Council chamber scene, it really feels like Viktor finally feels like he's allowed to openly pursue Jayce because he's "perfect" now, and that to me is a linchpin of the idea that Viktor was holding himself back from pursuing Jayce openly because of his health.

Oh and I still think it's possible that Mel is Jayce's first as a result, or very near his first if him and Viktor maybe fooled around a bit or if Jayce had other relationships before that. But there is something very innocent in the way Jayce approaches sleeping with Mel that to me feels very much like he's had only a couple partners or fewer at the very least, if he hasn't been outright "saving himself for marriage" levels of hoping Viktor will notice him someday, which is my Jayvik romantic read of that moment he pauses before returning Mel's kiss, he's thinking, "Do I realistically have a shot with Viktor?" and concluding sadly that, no, he doesn't so he might as well stop denying himself a possible relationship over it anymore.

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Chapter 8- Something to Believe In

Summary: Frankie makes good on his promise to pick you up from work.

Word count: 3.7K

Pairing: Frankie Morales x f!reader (reader has a name/nickname, no use of y/n)

Warnings: Having a panic attack (cue Frankie to the rescue), mentions of death and grieving, angst, yearning, could we perhaps be ✨making progress✨?

A/N: Hi friends!! Thanks for bearing with me after no new chapter last week! This one's also on the shorter side, but that's not to say there aren't some BIG things happening 👀 My hope is to have another chapter done by next week, but with holiday business, it may have to be two weeks between chapters again (sorry sorry sorry!!) Thank you as always for your lovely and kind words, ily all so much MWAH

All The Things We Never Said Masterlist

Previous Chapter Next Chapter

Frankie, Present 

“I’m done at ten.” 

By the time he gets back home at 6:43, he’s already counting down the hours until you’re finished with your shift. 

Three hours and seventeen minutes, to be exact. 

For as much as Frankie could easily spend the next three hours and seventeen minutes doing nothing but staring at the clock hanging adjacent to the TV in the living room, he knows he’ll drive himself out of his goddamn mind. He needs something to do. 

If he keeps himself busy, he can’t fester on the million and one ways he could manage to fuck this up. 

Frankie forces himself to eat some sort of half-assed dinner, despite his nervous nausea that’s got the best of him. He purposely uses as many dishes and utensils to make a sandwich as humanly possible- if he does, it gives him something to do after. 

He cleans out his entire truck, down to vacuuming every last crumb crunched between the driver’s seat and center console. He debates washing the car himself in the driveway, but if he drives it to the carwash three blocks down the road, it’ll kill more time. 

On his way home, he stops at Auto Zone to get you a new car battery and exchanges it for your old one, dead, under the hood of your car. 

Frankie takes a shower so long, he can feel in real time the water shift from boiling hot, to luke warm, to ice cold. He washes his hair twice. His body, three times. 

He unpacks just about every item of clothing from his suitcase, laying them out on his bed in multiple combinations of pants and shirts, debating whether you'll think he’s a psychopath for showing up in a different outfit only a few hours after dropping you off. Frankie settles on shorts and a t-shirt- nice enough he doesn’t look like a fool, but casual enough for you not to suspect he’s been staring at every article of clothes he owns for the past thirty minutes. 

And somehow, after all of that, he still ends up in the Parrot’s Nest parking lot at 9:23. 

Thirty-seven minutes worth of waiting is a lot more manageable than the better part of three hours. 

Unfortunately, the last thirty-seven minutes he spends sitting in the parking lot are the most agonizing of his whole endeavor. 

He throws the last few innings of the Tampa Bay Rays game on the radio in the background, unable to stand the sound of silence that haunts him when he’s alone with his thoughts. 

Frankie tries not to panic at the fact that it seems like he’s forgotten how to engage in basic human conversation, praying that no one can see the way he’s rehearsing his greeting to you upon your arrival into the passenger seat. 

“Hey, what’s up? No, fuck, that’s stupid.” Frankie mutters to himself, running his palm over his face, “Hey, MacKenzie, how was work? No, ‘cause what if work was fucking awful and I’m just gonna piss her off more. Jesus.” 

He takes a few more long, deep breaths, staring at the roof of his truck while he tries to concoct the perfect set of words to string together. 

“Hey, Kenz. Kenzie? MacKenzie? Does she even fucking go by Kenz anymore? Fuck. Hey, miss me?” He jokes by his lonesome, his fake smile quickly fading at the anticipation of your response, “She obviously didn’t miss you, idiot. You’re lucky you can barley get her to fucking talk to you. Fuck me.” 

His pained groan and scrunched shut face are enough cut off the awareness to his surroundings just long enough to leave him oblivious to the fact you’ve not only exited the Parrot’s Nest, but have made your way across the parking lot and have your hand wrapped around the passenger door, rattling the handle. 

“Jesus fucking Christ!” Frankie shouts, nearly jumping out of his own skin at the way you’ve announced yourself by shaking at the locked door. 

So much for rehearsing. 

“F-fuck-” He stammers, taking a moment to catch his breath from your scare, praying he hasn’t managed to shit his pants from how badly you’ve startled him. Once his pulse settles to rate low enough he’s convinced he hasn’t died of a heart attack, he leans over to unlock your door, unable to make eye contact with you as he grimaces his face in embarrassment. 

“S-sorry.” you murmur, sheepishly climbing into the seat next to him, quietly clicking in your seatbelt. 

“Jesus Kenz, you scared the shit outta me.” Frankie gulps, still trying to compose himself. He runs his hand through the curls of his hair, taking one last slow inhale and exhale with his eyes peeled to the floor, hoping the pink drains from his cheeks before he looks over at you. 

“Sorry, I- I didn’t mean to. I thought maybe you fell asleep, or something. You shrug, trying to defend your reasoning. 

“I wouldn’t offer to come pick you up and then fall asleep on you, I’m not that big of an assho-” 

Frankie cuts himself off before he can finish the rest of his thought, feeling the “L” and “E” of “asshole” die off somewhere in the back of his throat, killed by the death glare you give in proclamation of his own self-righteousness.  

He starts the car without another word, pulling out of the parking lot and hoping that his silence begs enough forgiveness. 

The crackling static of the car radio fills the void between you, Andy Freed’s ecstatic voice capturing both of your attentions enough to let the current state of the Tampa Bay Rays game shift your focus. 

“What’s the score?” You ask, nonchalant, eyes wandering anywhere but Frankie’s direction. 

“Oh- uh, I- I think it was 1-3 last time I checked, but it sounds like someone on the Rays just hit a sac fly, so I’m guessing it’s 2-3, now.” 

There’s a moment of silence, Frankie assuming you’ve got it in you to at least make one question’s worth of small talk. You seem just as surprised as him that you don’t let the conversation die there. 

“Did you um- you watched the game when you got home?” 

Your gaze won’t lock with his, but now, it’ll at least travel in his general direction. 

“N-no, I just uh- I just turned it on while I was waiting in the car.” 

“How long were you waiting for?” 

“N-not that long.” He barely gives you enough time to breathe, let alone call him out on his bullshit before he’s changing the subject, “How uh- how was work?” 

“Oh- It was uh- it was fine. Went by really slow. B-because it wasn’t um, it wasn’t that busy.” 

Frankie’s no code breaker, but he hopes the way you’re so quick to give him a reason why your shift had dragged on is a secret way of saying you spent just as long thinking about him as he did about you. 

“Sorry it was so slow.” 

Frankie knows his apology doesn’t do anything for you, but the way he’s picking each word that comes out of his mouth has him feeling like he’s tiptoeing through a minefield, too scared to make any move besides the one that seems the safest. 

“It’s okay, not your fault. That’s honestly part of the reason I took this job- was to give myself something to do, so I don’t spend every last second that my dad is alive dwelling on the fact that pretty soon, he’s not gonna be alive. It’s stupid, but I guess if being preoccupied with serving middle aged couples mozzarella sticks and over-cooked steak tacos for a few hours helps, then so be it.”  

He knows better than anyone that your attempt at humor is your shield, but it’s not hard to see how weathered and worn it’s become, barely hanging on by a thread to protect you from the worst battle you still have yet to face. 

“N-no, it makes sense. Distractions help. I-It’s been hard, having to see him like this. I get it.” 

His last sentence makes your head snap up from the ground. Out of the corner of his eye, Frankie hopes that maybe your attentiveness means he’s had a breakthrough, showing enough genuine empathy that you’ll cut him a little slack. 

When he turns enough to see the scowl plastered across your face, he realizes he’s stepped on a bomb, and he’s moments away from explosion. 

“Oh, you ‘get it’, huh?” You scoff, sadistic smile curling in the corner of your cheeks. 

Frankie can see the way your blood is beginning to boil, trying to backtrack as quickly as possible to find any way to save himself. 

“N-no- I mean, shit-  no, Kenz, you know what I mean.” Frankie pleads. 

“No, I don’t know what you mean, Frankie. Please, explain.” 

The way your arms are crossed and head is cocked tells him everything he needs to know. Against his better judgement, Frankie decides not to take cover. He goes headfirst into the warzone. 

“C’mon, Kenz, don’t be like this.” Frankie sighs, preemptively kicking himself that this is the route he’s chosen to take. 

“Like what?” You snap back, sharp and sarcastic. 

“Like it’s not hard for me, too. Like I can’t be sad about it. You’re not the only person who cares about him, MacKenzie. He was the closest thing I had to a dad, too.” 

“But he’s not your dad, is he? And if you were, that’d make you a pretty shitty son, wouldn’t it?” 

It hits him like a cold, hard slap to the face, the way you don’t dare to show him even an ounce of mercy. There’s something about the bitterness in the way you ask it that hurts even more than if you would have just screamed at him, cursed him out, punched and pushed him until he bruised. 

A stark silence falls over the car, tension so thick, it’s like a bag of bricks has been dropped from the sky, drowning him in a useless pile of cement. There’s no use in crying for help. He doesn’t dare to speak, simply out of fear that if he does, this won’t be the worst of what’s yet to come. 

Frankie stays trapped for what feels like hours, each second passing by more painfully slow than the last as you stare out your window, watching the shadows of street lights dance across your body, illuminating you just enough to see the way your chest trembles with short, frantic breaths as you unravel. Your sobs can’t hide behind the silence in the way your tears can in the darkness. 

“Do you know how fucking lonely it is, Frankie? How lonely it is when everyone you’ve ever cared about leaves you? It’s like I’m fucking Midas, but everything I touch, eventually, I lose. A life before cancer, my soccer career, an engagement, a future, my dad, you? You don’t get to tell me how hard it is for you, because you get to let go of what you want on your terms, when it’s convenient for you, don’t you? I’m so sick of losing, Frankie. I’m so sick of it.” 

He watches in real time how something inside you snaps, like a bottle of soda that’s erupted after someone’s violently shaken shaken it, the twist of the cap releasing all the pressure and tension that’s been stored up and compounded upon with each rattle of their wrist. 

Frankie knows he’s not responsible for all of it, but he's the last bump you can take before you have no other choice but to overflow, leaving every ounce of you to seep out, vulnerable and exposed. 

What starts off as softs sobs, quickly shifts to heart wrenching heaves of your chest, every word you’re trying to get out lodged in your throat. He sees how your eyes fill with fear at the way you suddenly can’t catch your breath, body shaking as you shrink into your seat, fingers wrapping around your seatbelt with an iron grip around the worn fabric. 

“Kenz? Kenzie, are you okay?” It only seems fair he’s completely disregarded everything you’d had to say, beginning to panic at your tremoring figure crumpled next to him, speaking in nothing but violent wails you can’t control. 

“I- I- f-fuck, f-f- Frankie, fuck, n- no, no, I-” 

He won’t let you finish your thought- he only lets you stammer out the few words you can manage before he’s pulled off on the nearest neighborhood side street he can find. He blames it on military habit, how quick he is to react in the face of your panic, but he knows damn well it’s nothing but instinct the way he’s all but throwing off his seatbelt so he can reach across the center console and wrap you in his arms. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. You’re okay. I’m here. Just try and breathe, okay?” Frankie whispers, squeezing you so tightly in his arms you just might break. 

“I c-can’t, I can’t, fuck, i-it- it, it f-feels like I can’t breathe.” You sob, feeling your tear stains pool in the fabric of his shirt covering, face buried against his chest. 

“I know. I know it’s scary. I promise you’re okay, it’ll pass. Just try and breathe with me, okay?” 

He hopes you don’t notice how shaky his own breaths are, trying his best to stay calm with each long inhale and exhale he takes. The wave of grief that washes over him is different than the one you’re drowning in, the kind that makes his heart break at the type of panic he’s known all too well- he’d give every bone in his body to absorb your pain and make it his, but the best he can do is hold you until it subsides. He’ll hold you all night, if that’s what it takes. 

It’s a few minutes before he can finally feel your heart rate starting to slow, the stiffness of your muscles beginning to ease in his grasp as you come back down to earth with him. Your tears haven’t stopped, but at least your chest starts to rise and fall with his. It’s a baby step, but he’ll take any steps he can get in the right direction. 

“There ya go. Just like that. It’s okay. Worst of it’s over, I promise.” 

With the way one thumb is gently stroking your back and the other is carefully brushing the back of your head, it’s safe to say every inhibition Frankie could have has flown out the window. He hates how there’s a selfish part of him that can’t describe the way it feels to hold you again, even if it’s like this, but that’s a battle of his own he’s not willing to face today. For now, he’ll accept the sweet bliss of his self-indulgence while you’re curled against him. 

“You’re okay, Kenz. I’m here. I promise, you’re okay.” 

Enough time passes that his t-shirt isn’t getting any wetter, finally brave enough to peek your head up from the crook of his neck to wipe your tear stained cheeks with the back of your hand. Frankie’s grip only loosens enough to let you sit up, arms still engulfing your frame, tight enough to make sure you don’t float away on him again. 

“I- I’m s-sorry.” 

It’s so soft as it leaves your lips, if he wasn’t waiting on your every word, Frankie just might have missed it. Little do you know, he’s hanging on your every breath. 

“Hey,” he pauses, your eyes locking with his, softly pouting at the way your panic has made your face red and puffy, carefully swiping his thumb across your cheek to catch the wetness still streaming down the corners of your eyes, “you have nothing to apologize about, okay?” 

He waits in the silence again, letting you softly nod your head in agreement, watching the gears turn in your head as you process everything that’s just happened. You’ve come to enough to notice the way his hand still sits on the small of your back- he’s just as surprised as you when you let him keep it there for another moment before subtly shifting back in your seat. 

Your face scrunches shut, wincing with the last few deep breaths you take, like you're trying to push the rest of it out of your system for good. Frankie runs his hand through his messy hair and down the nape of his neck as he takes you in, still riding his melancholy high of the weight of your body pressed into his. 

“Thank you. For um- just, t-thank you.” You mutter, too sheepish to look him in the eye again now that full blown embarrassment has set in. 

“Yeah. Yeah, of course.” 

Frankie nods, trying his best to let you know that he means it- really, truly means it. It’s the way he won’t take his eyes off you that must let you know he understands, watching you shift just enough in your seat for him to notice how your body turns ever so slightly to face him. 

“They’ve uh- fuck, it just comes out of nowhere sometimes. It’s um- it’s happened before, but these past few weeks, it just- it’s been a lot, I guess.”  

“It’s been a while since I’ve had one, but I um- I got ‘em all the time after I came home. Feels like you’re dying. It sucks.” 

It’s not graceful, but it’s genuine. Vulnerable. Honest. Frankie knows it’s the most truth he’s given you in more years than he’d like to admit. It’s not much, but it’s enough to see you scale the top of the wall you’ve built between you and him and kick down one of the bricks that’s holding it together. It’s not much, but it’s one less brick than that wall has had for a very, very long time. 

“What are you talking about? That was so much fun.” 

In the shared moment of soft, sympathetic laughter, it’s that he realizes the softest smile that’s stretched in the corner of your lips. Frankie tries not to stare, but when he sees it, he remembers how much he’s hated living without it. He takes it in for as long as he can, memorizing every crease and crinkle in your face, no matter how subtle. He’ll soak in every second he can. He’s thankful he does, because it’s only a matter of time before it starts to shift, corners of your cheeks shifting as you pick at the skin around your nails. 

“I- um- I’m sorry- a-about what I said earlier.  I- I didn’t mean it.” 

Frankie lets out a huff of confusion, convinced you must be playing a joke on him with your unprompted apology. He’s almost tempted to laugh again, but the way your jaw shifts back and forth, anxiously grinding on your teeth while your eyes stay peeled to the fingers working away at your skin reminds him of every other apology you’ve ever offered. The same look when you accidentally popped the brand new basketball he got for his 13th birthday, the same fidgeting of your fingers when overreacted to the dent you thought he put in your brand new car backing out of your driveway, the same tick of your jaw when you had told him why you hadn’t written him more while he overseas on his last tour of duty. 

You really do mean it. 

“It’s okay. I deserve it.” Frankie admits. As hurtful as it was, he knows you weren’t completely unjustified in what you said. He also knows if you’re offering him an olive branch, he’ll offer you nothing short of a whole olive tree back. 

“No- well, I mean, maybe a little-” your sarcastic self correction makes him laugh again, something long forgotten warming in his heart at the way your hidden grin reappears in the corners of your cheeks, “No- I just- that was shitty of me to say. I’m sorry. It’s- it’s just a lot right now. Not totally fair to take it all out on you.” 

“I know. It’s okay.” Frankie pauses, captivated by the way your eyes flicker up to meet his, still wet and sparkling from the last of your tears, shimmering in the warm glow of the streetlights. He wants to reach out, to grab you, hold you, press you against his chest again and tell you that everything will be okay, but he won’t risk burning the bridge of the progress he’s built. Not yet. The best he can do is keep building, nail by nail, plank by plank. 

“If you um- if you ever need someone to- to talk to, or whatever, I’m always-” 

“I know.” 

There’s a different kind of silence that fills the empty spaces of his truck the last ten minutes of the ride home. It’s no longer heavy, burdened by pain and fear with every breath that enters its void. It’s the quiet kind of reassurance that doesn’t need any words. The kind that says everything it needs to from stolen glances back and forth, accompanied by the warmth of pink cheeks hidden in the black of the night sky. 

The last thing that’s said after he’s pulled into your driveway is a simple “thank you”. It’s only two words, but something about those 8 letters put together seems like enough to fill a book with how much it says. 

The only thing that says more is the way you look over your shoulder when you make it to your porch, so brief that if he wasn’t looking for it, he surely would have missed it. 

Because in that moment you look back at him, he swears there’s a smile straining against the line of your lips that you’re trying desperately to fight. 

Maybe he’s imagining it. Maybe he’s truly lost his mind. Maybe he’s crazy. Whatever he may be, Frankie Morales knows he won’t sleep a wink tonight at the thought that he’s finally the reason for the smile on your face again. 

@chaotic-iguana @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine

@pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24

@3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @raspberrybesitos

@partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo

@endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @milly-louise

@jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled

@pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @vee-bees-blog @itsokbbygrl

@hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @mandoisapunk @msmorningstaarr

@amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @picketniffler @burningnerdchild

@copperhalfcent @theoraekenslover @bloodyinspirationaldemon @vee-bees-blog

@samgirl4life @pigeonmama @survivingandenduring @jolapeno @ovaryacted

@amanitacowboy @mystickittytaco @anoverwhelmingdin @greenwitchfromthewoods

@witchofthedeepwoods @ericamarie093 @readingiskeepingmegoing @whimsiwitchy @whoaitspascal87

@vickie5446 @katw474 @ravenpoe67 @inthedarkestnight @brittmb115

@harryscherrysugar @wonderpillar @sunnytuliptime @pasc4lfuzz @yesjazzywazzylove-blog

@kungfucapslock @vannabanana1995 @beezusvreeland @guelyury

@javierpena-inatacvestnotifs

[coffeegnomee]

There is Nothing like the feeling of seeing two people interact after a year and 9 months and them being exactly the same.

The not accepting Zam's self depreciation/being wrong that vi was right, vi's little punches to emphasize his point. his really (really Really) long contemplative pauses. zam's silence, nervous jumping, waiting to hear what vi might be thinking. vi's difficulty in choosing words but also being devastating when he does (eclipse is his favorite story ever told on lifesteal. ok so just kill me now). zam's emotional leaning (i just really missed you. do you want to watch the sunset?) zam showing love but feeling like he can't be exuberant about bc he shows it by saying words while vi shows happiness by smiling silently (and wanting to talk off stream). the absolute dread from zam when vi couldn't find the words to describe his feelings, the pure joy giggles when vi instead said he missed it. the back and forth "hi's" when the convo gets lost.

But both of them growing and maturing. vi admitting he wasn't right, and he did keep things from zam. zam apologizing and saying he was scared to bring it up last season.

long story short I'm not okay.

[jeonscatalyst]

What's the story of the hello kitty plushy and the heart pillow?

Lol anon.

It’s actually quite funny.

The first time we saw the Hello Kitty and heart plushies was in Jungkook’s latest GCF in Budapest, posted about a year ago.

When people first noticed the plushies, many assumed they belonged to Jungkook’s “girlfriend,” because, you know, there’s no way Jungkook, who has a pink shower bag, a fuzzy wallet, and Bratz doll lip balm, could own a rainbow Hello Kitty plushie.

Fast forward to July of this year when Taehyung’s Type 1 photos were released, and there was a photo of him with an identical Hello Kitty plushie to the one seen in Jungkook’s GCF.

Upon seeing this, Taekookers immediately concluded that the plushies were definitely the same and that Tae must have gifted it to Jungkook. Later, when they found out Jungkook was also in Hawaii when Tae took those photos, it became “proof” to them that there was a connection, which, to be fair, isn’t far-fetched.

So now, they believe the Hello Kitty plushie is definitive proof that Taekook is real, with Tae gifting it to Jungkook as a symbol of his undying love. They also think that Tae including the plushie in his photobook and Jungkook openly displaying it in his living room is a hint about their relationship.

As for the heart plushie, at first, most were certain it was Tata (Taehyung’s BT21 character), but later, this was debunked. It turns out the heart is a Balenciaga Chinese Valentine’s Day Heart pillow, which customers receive only after spending a certain amount at stores. Now, Taekookers believe that this, too, was gifted to Jungkook by Tae, alongside the Hello Kitty plushie…despite not recalling Tae ever wearing Balenciaga, though we know who does wear a lot of it.

Anyway, the thing here is, I don’t think Taekookers are entirely wrong to think the Hello Kitty rainbow plushie we saw with Tae and Jungkook might be the same. It’s possible, especially since Jungkook was in Hawaii too.

Where I think they’re missing the mark, however, is the assumption that Tae gifted it to Jungkook as proof of romance. We’re talking about the same Jungkook who has admitted several times that he sometimes takes things he likes from sets. He’s taken clothes, jewelry, pillows, and even cooking ingredients. He’s said that when he sees something he likes after a shoot, he simply asks if he can take it, and usually, they let him.

There’s absolutely no proof that Jungkook’s rainbow Hello Kitty plushie is in any way connected to Tae. If it is, I’m almost certain that Jungkook liked it, asked Tae if he could have it, and Tae said yes. Anyone with a functioning brain knows this doesn’t point to any romance. But Taekookers, desperate to fit everything into a romantic narrative, will twist any detail.

These are bandmates and friends who have known each other and lived together for years. They are also K-pop idols who often get gifted items from brands or receive sponsorships, so it’s not unusual to see them having similar things. How many times have we seen members with similar clothing, accessories, and other items? Too many to count. That’s one reason I personally don’t see things like members having similar clothing as a sign of anything because it’s expected. There’s nothing odd about two bandmates having similar plushies, so the fact that this is being blown out of proportion is just strange to me.

They also believe that Jungkook choosing to take the plushie to his new house is significant. Well, I think it says one thing: Jungkook likes the plushie. The man literally had his Spotify t-shirt (which Spotify gifted him) displayed on his couch in his new house. Does that mean he’s dating Spotify now? I’m fairly certain the heart pillow was a gift from Balenciaga, but he’s also displaying it. Does that mean he’s dating Balenciaga? The whole thing is so ridiculous when you really think about it. For Taekookers, it’s never about what Taekook actually say or do, it’s about how much they can twist things to fit their narrative.

Imagine thousands of fans trending Taekook based on a scenario they’ve invented, fully believing it without any real proof. The only thing they know for a fact is that Tae and Jungkook seem to have similar rainbow Hello Kitty plushies. They’re not even sure if it’s the same one, they don’t know why Jungkook has it, or who gave it to him, but just because it’s similar to what they saw with Tae, they’ve concluded that it was a gift from Tae and this definitely is proof of something.

It’s one thing to speculate when things align, but it’s a whole different thing to make stuff up based on limited information and believe it wholeheartedly, up to the point of trending “Taekook” and using that made-up stuff as proof of a relationship.

This is exactly how Taekookers operate. Taehyung strolling hand in hand with Jennie last year wasn’t proof of a romantic relationship, but two bandmates seemingly having the same plushie is? It’s almost as ridiculous as them claiming that Jungkook’s Channel Coco Crush ring was the same one Tae shares with his friend group, like why wouldn’t Tae just get a ring exclusive to him and his partner? Why on earth would he choose to give him a ring that symbolizes his friendship with other people? No logic whatsoever. As long as they can link it to Taekook, they will regardless of if it makes sense or not. Yet, when they see Jikookers chatting about Jikook showering and singing together, which in and of itself is wholesome enough, they gather all the brain cells they had forgotten they had, for a rebuttal.

[lexirosewrites]

O!Steve & B!Robin as childhood friends!! Not Nancy Wheeler Friendly bc this is from a protective Robin POV & I needed drama & No Upside Down AU

They meet when Robin skips 4th grade & become friends when they're paired together for a project. Steve is a Henderson bc his mom divorced his sire Richard Harrington & Steve didn't want to b a Harrington anymore he wanted to have his mom's maiden name. He & his mom moved to Hawkins the week before school started.

Steve is chubby & a boy omega (which is rare especially in Hawkins Elementary where only two other boys in the grades below r omegas) which makes him different & he's not very good at reading aloud but he still gets some of the best scores on their social studies or history lessons & his scent is still muted like the kids younger than them. So he isn't popular but he isn't overtly bullied but he is largely ignored by the kids w more social capital.

So he & Robin bond abt being treated as outcasts. They quickly become best friends & spend as much time together outside of school as they can except every other Sunday bc Steve's mom drives a few towns away in Roane County to the nearest Episcopal church.

Robin was raised Buddhist bc her mom is a child of Vietnamese immigrants & her dad was an anti-war protester (especially after he gets drafted into Vietnam, causing him to lose his left leg). The Buckleys celebrate a vague Christmas tht they treat more like Yule with Father Winter instead of Santa, presents still happen but Robin is expected to choose a few of her gifts to give to a nearby domestic violence shelter where some kids stay.

Then high school starts. Steve has his first heat the summer before & so his scent matures to smell like baked apples w honey. He loses a bit of the baby fat, his face gets clearer of acne he'd developed in 7th grade, & his hair is noticeably more shiny. This means Steve is suddenly the subject of new attention by some of the beta boys & alphas of Hawkins High. It all makes Steve uncomfortable so Robin stops trimming her nails & even files them sharper when at home. She shows off her newly sharp nails when she scratches up the arms of an alpha senior who wasn't taking Steve's polite refusals as an answer, tearing up their jacket sleeves, & even ripping a big hole in the bottom of their backpack so all their things tumbled out.

After tht word spread quickly tht Steve Henderson had a guard, Robin Buckley. So the attention turned from a rush to a trickle.

A!Tommy Hagan tries harassing Steve in their sophomore year & calling it courting but Robin tells B!Carol Perkins tht Tommy is trying to cheat on her & together they scratch Tommy so deeply he gets scars. Sophomore year is also when Steve begins babysitting for extra cash. He starts w his little cousin Dustin, then the Sinclairs hire him every other Saturday night, & the list grows till Steve is having Robin help him keep a planner just to keep track of his babysitting gigs.

Then junior year brings abt a Steve who is the uncontested prettiest omega in school & the attention gets worse. Except now ppl know to try to get Robin's approval. She doesn't make it easy & this weeds out the ppl who only wanted a chance to say they'd popped Steve's cherry.

This works till A!Nancy Wheeler sets her sights on Steve. Nancy does practically every task Robin gives her w minimal complaints, so Robin gives Nancy the chance to actually court Steve. Except it quickly becomes clear to Robin tht Nancy didn't seem all tht interested in learning more abt steve outside of who he was in the schools social ladder. Robin would watch how Nancy flaunted their relationship to others to establish a growing social status but would then make eyes at B!Jonathan Byers, The Creep as others called him.

When O!Will Byers goes missing (later being found kidnapped by his father) & B!Barb runs away while the town is focused on tht, Nancy becomes more & more disinterested in Steve. Apparently insisting to Steve tht Barb was her best friend & tht she would've told Nancy if she was going to run away. Robin snorts when Steve tells her this bc it was obvious to Robin their friendship was a one way street of Nancy getting what she wanted.

So of course Nancy embarrasses herself & Steve at Tina's Halloween party the next year, after a year of growing colder towards Steve & leading him on & insisting to them both tht Jonathan is just a friend. Of course Nancy runs off w Byers after the whisper of a lead on where Barb had gone reaches her ears, of course she comes back smelling like Byers in a way tht made it clear she'd had sex w him & only then breaking up w Steve & worst of all is how Steve doesn't get angry with Nancy or Jonathan.

It all gets more annoying when Steve is newly single & knot headed A!Billy Hargrove tries approaching Steve when no one else is around. He never offers to exclusively court Steve & he never approaches Robin abt it either. He just follows Steve to secluded corners of the school or town & makes comments when no one is around to hear him.

Eventually they graduate, Robin decides to put off going away for college opting instead to take classes part time at the Roane County Community College w Steve. Billy Hargrove races out of town after he beats his father in the Hargroves front lawn, Mr Hargrove leaves town soon after but his wife & step daughter the Mayfields stay in Hawkins. Robin only learns most of this thanks to Steve being Max's babysitter now

for two weeks of the summer Nancy tries to court Steve again, claiming she'd changed but this is after Jonathan Byers learns tht Nancy hadn't broken up w Steve till after their fruitless attempt to convince Barb to come home led to them sleeping together & so he breaks up w her unable to believe she'd hurt Steve in the way his own father had hurt his mom

They get jobs at the mall in the food court. Then the larger parent company of their employer Scoops Ahoy gets shut down by the government for tax evasion & tax fraud & a whole list of illegal labor practices so they find new jobs at the Cinema-plex in the same mall. Then the mall burns down bc the construction was cheap & several safety regulations were blatantly ignored. So they find another job they can work together. This time at Family Video, after an interview w Keith (whose parents own the small strip mall where the laundromat & the arcade & video store r located) wherein Robin said her favorite movie was a German silent film she knew Keith would know nothing abt & Steve equally stumped Keith w a samurai movie tht Robin knew didn't circulate in the US, Ms Henderson had gotten the VHS of the movie shipped to Hawkins through friends in the UK.

Time went on, they took their classes at the small community college, Steve still babysat here & there, & the platonic soulmates were even apartment hunting in their free time. Settling on the relatively affordable rent of a 2 bed trailer in Forest Hills.

That's where Eddie Munson pops into their lives. Apparently he'd met Steve once or twice when Steve had come by to babysit Max. Now tht the pair lived so close by Munson he took to being a welcome committee. A couple of months of living in the trailer park, hanging out w Eddie who had begun working at the local mechanics instead of racing out of town like Hargrove, & buying the odd joint from the alpha at an obviously reduced price. Munson made his move & approached Robin on a day tht she was working without Steve.

The alpha was visibly nervous but determined & he didn't even shrink away when Robin glared him down for 5 minutes in silence. So she sighed & gave him a random task tht she knew Steve would like to see. This went on & on, Eddie growing closer w Steve & when Steve told Robin he wanted to b courted by their neighbor she delivered the news to Eddie w her best friend right behind her.

The pair courted for 2 years before Steve sat her down & told her he was pregnant just abt 2 months along & tht he & Eddie were going to exchange bites before the due date & tht they wanted to move in together. Robin was silent bc they were supposed to leave for Portland tht spring, so tht she could attend college & Steve could get a cosmetology license, they were supposed to remain together into their old age. She didn't even realize tht she'd nearly gone into a srs beta drop till it was the next morning & she was being held by Steve in his nest.

Over breakfast sandwiches in bed Steve explained tht she had dropped before Steve could tell her tht if she approved Eddie was going to drive to Portland two weeks before they planned to leave & get a 3 bedroom apartment set up. If she didnt approve Eddie was still going to drive there early but just find an apartment for stobin & another apartment for himself. They talked for hours abt how Steve didn't want to b best friends w anyone except Robin & his alpha, how Robin had been scared for awhile abt Steve leaving her, & it ended w them having a movie night where they ordered Eddie to pick up a pizza & sodas & the biggest order of chicken tenders possible

7 months later after a home birth in Portland Oregon, Robin cried when she got to meet her best friends twin babies & learned tht they'd named the youngest of the baby girls Janis Robin Munson while the older twin was Joan Cathy Munson (Cathy was Eddie's mom's name & coincidentally grandma Henderson's name)

& Aunty Robin became the Munson pups favorite babysitter 🥰

Robin being protective of omega Steve is always so lovely💕💕💕

[maleyanderecafe]

Locked Out (Kinetic Novel)

Created by: SlowlyTee 🍓

Genre: Horror/Romance

This is a short but complete kinetic novel about a girl named Sallie who gets locked out of her apartment and has to wait it out in her neighbor Kien's apartment until she can get the locksmith to come. It has a very nice art style and a bit of a twist near the end, even if it does feel like it ends in a cliff hanger. You can find more at @slowlytee.

The story starts out with Sallie coming back home from her work after a snowstorm only to find that she had accidentally locked her keys inside of her apartment. She finds that there's nobody she can turn to and instead calls a locksmith to help her get back in. Because of the snow storm, the company estimates that it will take them about an hour and a half to the apartment, meaning that Sallie will have to either stand outside in the cold or find a place to stay. While contemplating on the nearby places and how creepy that one guy at the mall was, her new neighbor Kien comes by and offers for her to stay at his place to wait. Having no real other option, she agrees and hangs out at his place to talk. We find out the reason why Kien is out so late is because of his insomnia and he talks about how he manages it, letting himself work on various projects to tire himself out. As a freelance editor, he is able to work on many projects on his own time. Sallie also talks about her job as a bartender and her desire to be a journalist, even if she knows her family doesn't really support her on this decision. Kien offers her a drink and suggests drinking some wild berry tea which Sallie agrees to. After variously talking for a bit, Kien heads to the bathroom and Sallie ends up passing out on the couch. Upon waking up, she finds that she missed the locksmith by two hours, causing her to panic. Kien comes in to tell her that he decided to pay for the fees and got her door unlocked while she was asleep. When asked to pay him back, Kien instead asks for her to go on a coffee date with him which she agrees to. After being given some wild berry tea leaves, Sallie returns back to her apartment. She decides before sleeping to call the company and figure out how much she owns Kien, however, upon calling, she finds that Kien actually cancelled the service stating that he was Sallie's boyfriend and simply unlocked it for her, leading the caller to get annoyed and scold her a bit for wasting her time. Immediately afterwards, Sallie goes to Kien's house and pins him against the wall angry. She more or less curses at Kien and tells him to not mess with her before he laughs stating that her reaction was very interesting.

First things first, I really like this artstyle in this game-it reminds me of an artist that I follow on instagram though it's not the same person. I think that the snowy atmosphere really brings a very good feeling to everything, not only the coldness that Sallie feels but also the contrasting warmness of when she goes into Kien's apartment. All in all, I honestly just really like the art style for this game. Another thing I like is how generally grounded this game is, as everything that happened is something that could feasibly happen in real life, which I think is always a fun thing to see in these types of kinetic novels. Despite how short it is, it's able to showcase both of the character personalities- even certain things like Sallie turning on Kien at the end by coming to his apartment and pushing him against the wall are also foreshadowed in her conversations with Kien.

Sallie initially comes off as a bit more aloof and reserved towards others, though it's completely understandable given that she's locked herself out of her apartment during a snowstorm. She doesn't actually ask Kien initially when she sees him to perhaps let her stay in his apartment until tlhe snowstorm starts, out of both politeness and out of awkwardness. We see this too when she stays in his apartment at least until Kien makes her more comfortable and insists on paying back Kien even after Kien tells her its okay, going so far as to call on the same day to figure out the pricing. At the same time though, we see that her job wasn't supported by her parents and thus she has to fund her own college classes through bartending. There's a sense of not wanting to have to be in debt in others no matter the cost, so I can see where she might have a kind of turn like this near the end. There are definitely bits of personality that shine through from what initially seems like a more polite and passive protagonist.

Kien, until the reveal at the end, is pretty good at hiding his yandere intentions. It's likely that he has been watching Sallie for a while, either because of his insomnia that allows him to watch over her at various times, or if he was lying just to make conversation with her. It also makes you wonder whether or not Kien himself was the one who locked Sallie's apartment door or if she did honestly forget and he took advantage of the situation. I think the most obvious thing he does is drug the tea that Sallie had- I honestly thought he was going to kidnap her after this instance, but instead he just goes out to unlock her door. Honestly, if Sallie had not decided to call the place to figure out how much she owed Kien, she probably wouldn't have found out that he was doing all of these things, like calling her his girlfriend or unlocking the door himself. I actually like this approach since there are a lot of little subtle hints into what's going on and then an ultimate confirmation at the end to see what he actually did. I am curious about his reaction though since he seems pretty smug for someone who was caught stalking and making a copy of her keys.

The game ends pretty abruptly on a cliff hanger. I think that while it could have made a more clean cut ending, the way that the cliff hanger ends give a sense of intrigue for what is to come. However, I can see why people would not like it since it is very abrupt and seemingly comes out of nowhere. Still, I think that it's a fun short game with a yandere in it with a good art style. Try it out if you haven't.

[studiogrimm810]

Speak of the Devil

pairings/characters: sam winchester x gn!you, dean is also there

summary: you are taken by lucifer for over a week and sam damn near looses his head. when you are finally rescued, the trauma of what was inflicted on you has left it's mark and it's up to sam and dean to keep you put together

warnings: torture, ptsd, flashbacks, abduction, graphic depictions of said torture

word count: 4,571

A/N: soooo, i had this idea come to me in a dream but also i'm just obsessed with trauma bonding lolol,,i've realized that this idea is too complex (and comforting) to just do once/one part so i think i'm going maybe work on a part 2 or maybe even a part 3 (eventually) for this one as well...okay, thats all, thanks for reading my rambles!!! <3

———————

The nights were the hardest for Sam, everything so still, calm, settled- it made him itch. He ached for you, but there was only so much he could do.

Dean was in auto-pilot, trying his damnedest to get any info on your whereabouts but he always came up short.

All either of them knew was that Lucifer had you and that was enough to make Sam sick to his core. He knew damn-well what the devil was capable of, he spent over a century learning of just that, so to think of the person he loved succumbed to even a fraction of that made him irrational.

It has now been over a week since you were taken and the boys are finally following up on their most helpful lead at the moment, pulling up to an empty hospital in a desolate neighborhood of Denver.

The building was a classically looking rundown hospital- windows shattered, paint chipped, doors broken in. The sight made Sam’s skin crawl. Usually, he wouldn’t be so affected by the sight of an eerie building but to think this is where you’ve been all this time rots his insides.

Sam takes the lead on this one, wasting no time to break through the front doors and let his eyes scan through the halls. Dean doesn’t say a word as he just lets his little brother storm the halls. He does make sure to be extra vigilant, hoping to catch anything Sam might miss on accident.

They make their way through halls and up staircases, ducking into every room for any hint of you.

The maze of halls inevitably makes Sam’s internal compass spin haphazardly as he starts to lose his placing. Standing at the end of one hallway that spans out into two new hallways, he’s frozen. Dean almost bumps into him as Sam stands still, his hands shaking but body stiff.

“Sammy?” Dean tests, trying to peek around him to get a read on Sam’s face. “Hey,” he calls more sternly this time, placing a firm hand on Sam’s shoulder to spin him towards Dean. “Talk to me.”

Sam turns to face his brother, his features melted into complete helplessness and loss.

Dean knows this look all too well.

His baby brother needs him.

“I don’t know where to go- I don’t-,” Sam shakes his head, his glossy eyes darting between Dean’s own. Dean’s features remain stiff as he takes in his brother's pain, clenching his jaw.

“They’re here, they have to be, and we’ll find them,” Dean states, commanding it to be true. Sam’s heartbreaking contort of painful fear makes Dean’s fury build, to think that not only did someone mess with you, but also his baby brother. It was enough to fuel out just enough confidence to not break down for Sam. “C’mon, pull yourself together,” Dean barks after a reassuring squeeze to Sam’s shoulder, his support being physical and not vocal.

Dean now takes the lead, choosing to go to the right. Sam follows close behind, his breaths so shallow that he doesn’t think his lungs are getting the proper amount of oxygen, but it doesn't seem to matter to him right now.

Another series of halls and rooms digs a deeper pit of dread between the brothers, but Dean refuses to quit for his brother.

They make their way to a staircase that leads to the top and final floor of the building. This has to be it.

Dean sneaks up the stairs carefully, looking up the hall to see a beam of light coming from a room on the far end. Dean turns his head to look down the other side to see nothing out of the ordinary. He quietly steps into the hall and motions for Sam to follow and stay quiet and close to the wall.

When Sam sees the beam of cool light his stomach flips with hope. He could almost feel that it was you in that room.

Halfway there, the brothers hear voices and Dean immediately signals for them to stop.

“He’ll kill ya, I’m tellin’ ya,” a masculine voice warned, which was followed by a more feminine groan of annoyance.

“He would never notice,” the second voice counters, seemingly as a whine.

“Just shut up,” the first voice sounds completely annoyed and down with their partner.

Dean inches closer, step by step, until he reaches the doorway and leans in just enough to see two figures that the voices are coming from. One is sitting in a chair in the far right corner and the other is standing next to a bed while fiddling with a small dagger.

That’s when Dean sees you.

You’re neatly tucked into the bed, a clean and tidy hospital bed with icy white sheets draped over most of your body. Your arms are laid out on top of the blanket, one having a drip of some liquid stuck in your arm. Your face is completely peaceful and devoid from any discomfort.

Dean presses back into the wall and looks at Sam, giving him a curt nod and signaling to get ready. Once Dean gets out his demon blade, he checks to make sure Sam is ready and then he attacks. Storming in and grabbing the farther guard, pressing the blade to its throat and scowling up at him.

“Why did you take them? Who are you!?” Dean roars, keeping his face a stone of anger as he seethes. The man with the masculine voice under Dean’s hold just scoffs with a cocky smile.

“I’m just workin’ a job, bitch means nothin’ ta’ me,” he licks his teeth, sizing up Dean.

“Who do you work for?” Dean emphasized with a mocking sneer. Both him and Sam needed confirmation that it was actually Lucifer who took you.

“I’m not at service to tell,” the man exaggerates with a sarcastically snooty eyebrow raise, trying to sound smart and ‘proper’.

“Too fuckin’ bad,” Dean wastes not time stabbing the man deep through his chest and watching as the skeleton underneath flickers like an electric surge of burnt orange and yellow.

Sam is quick to pin the demon he has to his chest so that Dean has a clean shot to her chest as well, killing her in the same fashion.

The body’s slumped to the ground with smoke rolling out of their mouths and eyes as their corpses are now just an empty shell. Neither brother cares to give a second glance since you’re still hooked up to some IV drip and completely unconscious.

“Hey, hey,” Sam coos, gently cupping your face in his hands, already shedding a few free tears. “C’mon, baby, can you hear me?” Dean grabs the bag to examine it but can only tell that it’s a clear liquid with no labels or indicator. Dean reaches down and carefully pulls the needle out of your arm and presses a piece of the blanket underneath you to the small bead of blood that follows.

The most bizzare thing about this whole setup is the lack of physical evidence of anyone hurting you. The only blemish they could see was the small bruise that surrounded the mark of the needle that Dean just removed. Both of them thought that after you had been gone for so long you’d at least be somewhat damaged, but why would someone take you just to keep you asleep in some abandoned hospital?

What was the purpose?

Somehow this was more terrifying to Dean.

Sam still hadn’t really taken the time to look you over or assess your situation, he was too busy with trying to wake you up.

“Sammy, they’ve been drugged, they’re not gonna wake up just yet,” Dean said softly, realizing Sam needs this moment, “we need to get them out of here.”

Sam sniffles and nods softly, not taking his eyes away from your closed lids.

“Can you carry, ‘em?” Dean asks, looking over his shoulder to make sure they’re still alone.

“Yeah,” Sam’s voice comes out hoarse, his shoulders burdened with worry and ache deep in his chest.

“C’mon,” Dean urges, turning to keep a lookout while Sam gets you situated. Thankfully, you’re fully clothed underneath but Dean avoids you both to preserve your privacy.

As Sam peels back the blanket he’s especially relieved that you’re still in the same clothes he last saw you in, somehow you looked even neater though. The shirt you wore had always had a small tear at the bottom hem but you refused to stop wearing it- now that tear was gone. So were the scuff marks on the knees of your jeans and even your hair looks silkier than usual.

He tries to push away any reasoning of why you seemed pristine.

He instead scoops you up and tucks you close to his chest the best he can, placing a soft kiss to your forehead and following Dean out. He murmurs soft reassurances and praises to you even if he knows that you can’t hear him, he still hopes that you can.

“You’re okay now, I’ve got you, sweetheart,” he kisses you again, keeping his eyes ahead of him and darting around to make sure there are no immediate threats to you.

Sam doesn’t let go of you even when they get to the Impala, even when he and Dean settle on making it a straight shot back to the bunker. Sam doesn’t care if he gets uncomfortable or too stiff because he cannot let go of you, even if he wanted to.

He settled in the car to still have you placed in his lap, arm still cradling your back and other drapes over your legs, holding you close and keeping you secure.

Dean steals glances back at his brother, Sam has barely looked up from you. Occasionally, a few tears fall and Sam will start sniffling, but then it fizzles out until he’s completely silent again.

Hours of driving and you’re still not even responsive and that continues to make Sam sick but he shoves those feelings down because he has to focus on getting you back in your bed at the bunker.

That’s his next step, getting you set back up in your own bed.

That’s all that matters right now.

He doesn’t remember falling asleep, but he’ll always remember the way that Dean beckons him awake- his voice softer than Sam has ever heard him before.

And that makes him feel a little worse, if he’s being honest.

Sam settles you back up in his arms and cradles your stiff body out of the Impala. He blindly follows Dean, now keeping his eyes down on you, silently praying that you’ll just wake up already.

Once he gets you completely settled in yours and his shared bed, an overwhelming sense of dread washes over him.

“Please, baby,” his words interrupted by a stifled sob and he reaches a hand up to cover his mouth, “just wake up,” he begs softly, pushing some hair out of your face and running his thumb over your cheekbone.

He would wait by your side until you finally did just that.

———

White hot. A rod of white hot pierced your stomach for what felt like the hundredth time. It twisted, wrapping your intestines up like a fork in spaghetti. You scream out in pure agony, your eyes lolling open to look down at the rusted pipe that’s lodged in your abdomen. You cry out, biting your lip and sobbing at the sight of your blood dripping out of the end of the hollow cylinder.

Your stomach looked like a pile of ground meat, flooded with blood and singed skin, the stench flaring your nostrils.

You see a hand wrapped around the exposed end and you follow it up to see burning red eyes staring back at you with a hungry smile.

Lucifer himself had subjected you to his torture for what felt like weeks and you were starting to give up any hope at being rescued.

He pulls out the pipe and flicks your blood off the pipe with a laugh that ripples up your spine like clawing bites. He spins his other wrist and just like that the pain is gone- your stomach completely patched over with fresh, unharmed skin.

He pulls back the pipe to hover it over an open flame and then he moves it to leave rings of burns along your exposed skin.

The pain- it’s too much, it’s too much.

You tug against your chains, hoping it’ll just come loose and unravel you out of this nightmare.

As you look back into the Devil's eyes, everything seemed to fade around the glowing red, like a light at the end of a tunnel. The eyes merge into one beam and they slowly dissolve into bright white.

The sounds of his laughter echo and the hold of the chains wrapped around you loosens.

You feel heavier.

You feel… awake.

Your head is strictly iron weight, keeping your body pressed into the soft cushion beneath you.

Soft.

It’s actually soft and you could cry.

Warm.

Oh, it’s warm too. Your fingers instinctively curl into the sheets under you, holding on tight so that you don’t float away from this sliver of paradise that Lucifer has seemed to slip you in.

You refused to question his methods because the peace you felt- no, the bliss was definitely something you’d take advantage of.

You hear your name being called and the sound spikes you out of your trance and sends your heart out of your chest.

There’s some rustling sounds and your name is called again and you feel absolutely hopeless. You can’t go back, please- please. You just got here, you just started to feel okay.

A large hand cups your face and you snap your head away with a sharp inhale, pushing past the heavy weight in your bones and letting your adrenaline surge your movement.

“Woah- hey, okay,” the voice says softly but you don’t even entertain it with patience. You get your eyes open and look around the room quickly. Upon realizing your hands are free from chains, you sit up and hold them to your chest, wrapping your wrists with your own fingers to bind them protectively. Your hair falls in front of your eyes and you refuse to move your hands away from where they feel safe so instead you try to flick away the stands so that you can see.

Your heart is racing and ears ringing, disorienting you further. You barely recognize the eyes staring you down- Sam?

Your chest heaves with frantic breaths as you stare up at him, back pressed to the bed frame behind you. You look around and see that you’re in your room at the bunker.

What? Is this real?

Sam freezes at your reaction, holding his hands out trying to reassure you that he’s not a threat.

“H-hey, it’s okay, you’re okay,” Sam nods, keeping his eyes glued to yours. You make no effort to move, this all just feels wrong.

You look around the room to find you’re both alone. Where’s Dean? If this were real, wouldn’t he be here too?

The door creaks open.

Speak of the… too soon.

Dean's head peeks in to check on Sam but he becomes fully alert when seeing the urgency of Sam’s stance.

“You’re awake,” Dean breathes out relieved, wanting to progress further and hug you but as he takes one step too close your back presses further into the wall behind you with a small whimper.

Your whimper cracks away at Sam’s chest.

“What-?” Dean starts to say but he can’t finish the thought.

“Honey, it’s just us, we’re not gonna hurt you,” Sam shakes his head, letting his eyes look over you for any signs of physical distress.

You swallow thickly as you look between them, a lump building in your throat as you try to choke back a sob. You continue to look around, unable to comprehend where you just woke up from, was it all just a dream?

“A-Am I dreaming?,” you breathe out, your voice unsteady and wavering. Sam and Dean share a quick glance but Sam returns back to you with a frim shake of his head.

“No, sweetheart, you’re awake, this is real,” Sam assures, tilting his head down to keep his eyes level with your unsure ones.

“Awake?” You echo, letting your eyes flick down a bit as you try to gather your thoughts. You look back up at him.

Him.

“S-Sam-.”

“Yeah, baby, it’s me,” he nods, wanting to inch further but too afraid that he’s going to scare you further, but the way you break down- slumping against the wall- he can’t help himself. He reaches out for you and wraps his arms around you, pulling you in close.

You unhook your binding hold on your own wrists to wrap around his neck. He just lets you cry as he rubs a free hand up your back.

“You’re okay, sweetheart, you’re okay,” he murmurs into your ear. You pull away to look at him again and let out another sob- this one of pure relief. You smile up at him, barely believing this is real but know that deep down it really is.

“Sam,” you exhale, holding his face in your hands so you can really feel him. “H-how did you find me? Where even was I?” You question, wanting to know why the transition from Lucifer’s torture to this felt like waking up from a bad bad dream. 

“Denver, we found you in Denver,” Sam explained, smoothing down some of your hair and appreciating your waking form with every flicker of his senses. “You were kept in some room and had been given medication to keep you asleep, I don’t know how long you’ve been out but we found you almost 20 hours ago,” Sam’s face saddened at the memories but forced those away to focus on how you’re right in front of him now.

“What? I’ve been here for almost a day?” You ask, brow pinched in confusion. Sam nodded.

It didn’t make any sense, you JUST saw Lucifer.

“What about… Lucifer.?” You ask, almost whispering, “where is he?” You asked, starting to feel on edge. You push away from Sam enough to look behind you and all around.

“Woah- okay, you’re safe. Lucifer isn’t here,” Sam says, startled by your sudden shift.

“N-no, he’s here- he has to be,” you stutter, your hands starting to shake and you instinctively bind your wrists to your palms again.

Sam swallows but keeps a firm hold on you, his own past trauma bubbling back up from its hidden pot that he keeps stashed miles away from his regular train of thought. His mind raced through the thousands of scenarios that the Devil put him through and to think of you experiencing just one of them made his heart ache.

“Hey, no one but us is in this bunker,” Dean steps in, trying to be the face of reason for the two under his care.

“What happened?” Sam asked, not acknowledging Dean but just wanting to hear from you. You look up at him, trying to organize your thoughts.

“No,” you shook your head, backed away and rubbed your forehead with your hands, “No, he- I just saw him, he has to be here-.”

“Honey, I promise you that you’ve been here for almost a day and no one else has come through. It’s just us,” Sam explains, his hands on your thighs as he tries to continue to assure you that you’re safe.

“But I just saw him,” you whisper as if you can’t believe it, your eyes drift as you try to shuffle through your thoughts and memories of the past few weeks.

“You’re okay, I promise,” Sam says, keeping his eyes locked on you, “Are you hungry? Thirsty?” At the mention of food, your stomach growls.

You nod softly and Dean offers to get some food for you three, hoping that giving you two some privacy will help calm you down a bit.

“Thanks, Dean,” Sam nods at his brother, simply sparing him a momentary glance so that he can keep his focus on you. After Dean leaves, closing the door behind him, Sam asks you another question, “what happened during that week?”

Your confusion is evident as you bring your eyes back up to his, “week? Have I been gone only a week?”

“Yeah, well 9 days technically, but we found you without a scratch,” Sam explained. You could see the dormant fear of what the hell happened to you during that time, “the way we found you was as if you were being preserved.”

You shake your head, not completely understanding.

“No, Sam, he’s been torturing me- constantly,” your words tremble and you continue to rub your own wrists to keep yourself grounded. “H-he would hurt me and hurt me until he needed to erase it all to start over again, h-he wouldn’t stop,” you shake your head, your words spewing out like a fire hydrant cracked open by the ram truck of emotions that went at it full force, “a-and it was weeks, Sam, it felt like weeks and he wouldn’t stop,” you choke out, rubbing your wrists raw.

Sam doesn’t know what to say but he’s worried about the burn you’re giving yourself on your wrists so he reaches out to gently hold your forearms, hoping to separate your hands.

“Y-you’re okay, now, baby, you’re safe,” Sam tries to keep his composure, trying to be strong for you.

“Sa-Sam, the things he-,” you couldn’t even get the words out but Sam practically read your mind. He quickly pulled you into a tight hug, keeping his arms around you protectively. His insides tremble with a whirlpool of fear, regret, trauma, pain, love, and god- so much more that he can’t even focus on right now. But his bones refuse to let him shake, keeping a sturdy hold on the love of his life and hoping that it offers some sense of security or comfort.

“I know, baby, I know,” he spans his hands out as wide as he can to cover every possible inch of your back. “You’re okay, he’s not here anymore, you’re safe,” he lets his palm run up and down the top of your back, right over your spine, and usually this would calm you but once he got too close the nape of your neck you recoiled away, tensing up and refusing to let his hand meet the skin.

He has to force bile back down his throat because he immediately knows why you had that reaction. Something that Lucifer would do to Sam in the pit was grabbing the back of his neck and piercing the scruff to a hook in the cage. Lucifer would often tease the method by tickling up Sam’s neck and digging his nails into the skin, just the thought makes Sam dizzy again. Has Lucifer done the same to you? Sam thinks, forcing his hand back down the span of your back to hold the spots where he only felt safe being touched after his time with Lucifer.

“I’m so sorry, baby,” he murmurs, pressing a soft kiss to your head. You continue to shake in his arms, trying to piece together why you and Sam have different explanations for your time missing.

You both stay like this for a while, Sam not wanting to let go and you not wanting him to. You end up tangled together on the bed in a peaceful silence. You really didn’t want to talk about what happened or really even think about why or how it did. You were more than content to be in Sam’s arms again, pressed to his chest.

The sound of the bunker door opening made you flinch, worried that it could be anyone or anything. Sam’s hold on you tightens softly, letting his fingers grip your hip a bit deeper.

“It’s okay, honey, it’s just Dean back with the food,” Sam's voice low and sweet. “Let’s go eat, hmm?” He pulls back his head to look at you better. You’re hesitant to leave the safety of your room but you’re crazy hungry so you nod and sit up. Sam keeps his eyes on you as you push up and go to stand. He feels like he needs to constantly keep an eye on you, afraid of what will trigger you out of nowhere.

The two of you meet Dean in the kitchen, Sam keeping his hand on your lower back to guide you through the halls of the bunker.

“Got you a bacon burger with all its greasy goodness,” Dean smiles, hoping his attitude can help lighten up the tension a bit. The small smile that blesses your lips rewards him of that.

Sam pulls out a chair for you, the side of the table that is closest to the corner of the room so you don’t have too much free space behind you.

Despite the hunger gnawing at your gut, you can only pick at your food. You eat a few fries and tear off pieces of your burger. Sam worries when he sees this, but he understands how difficult it must be for you right now so he doesn’t comment on it.

Dean has just polished off his food and Sam made it halfway through his before calling it quits but you’ve barely made much of a dent. Dean gives Sam a silent question, asking if they need to discuss anything now or if it should wait. Sam doesn’t honestly know, but due to how tired you already seem he thinks he’ll just help you to bed and talk with Dean later. That way they can come up with a course of action and recovery for you.

“Are you tired, honey?” Sam asks after wiping his hands with his napkin and setting everything aside. You nod, pulling your eyes up from where they’ve been planted to your plate while you ate. Your eyes plan to go to him but they land on a messy figure across the room with glowing red eyes and that same awful smile that’s burned into the backs of your eyelids. You jump back, your chair scraping the tile on its way to the wall behind you, you take a quick gasp of air and your fear fuels hot tears to your eyes.

Dean instantly looks back to where your eyes lead and so does Sam, standing to guard you from whatever threat it is you see, but they only see the far end of the kitchen where the stove clock flashes the time and nothing seems out of the ordinary. Sam snaps back to you to see you frozen in fear.

“Baby? What is it?” He asks, crouching down to your level and reaching out for your hands.

“H-he’s here, it’s him,” you stutter, gripping your wrists tightly again. Sam looks back out into the room to see absolutely nothing out of the ordinary.

“Who? Honey, there’s no one there,” Sam shakes his head, scanning over your face for any hint of what’s going on.

No, that can’t be right. You see him. You can actually see him. You drag your shaken eyes to look up over at Sam, mouth slightly agape and tears dripping down your cheeks, “y-you can’t see him?”

———————

thank you so much for reading!! <3

>pictures are not my own, i have the originals linked here (pinterest) >>check out my other works here

[arc852]

Gifting Myself to You

Summary: Jimmy has been living in the walls of Tango and Skizz's restaurant for a few years now. It's been a little less than a year since he was discovered and since then, he's become friends with the two of them. And as friends, Tango and Skizz are constantly offering Jimmy to come and live with them. Up until now, Jimmy has said no.

But after a lot of thought and more time, he realizes he does want to live with them. And with Christmas coming up, he comes up with a special way to tell them.

Warnings: some anxiety

Word Count: 3467

AO3 Link

Merry (very early) Christmas everyone! I got this idea when a group of us in discord were talking about tinies being given as gifts or gifting themselves to humans. I went with the latter and now this exists! I hope you guys enjoy!

______________________________________________________________

 “Did you bring the stuff?” Jimmy asked as he hopped off of Scott’s hand and onto one of the many counters within the kitchen. He heard Scott scoff as Jimmy turned back around to face him and saw Scott pulling out a bin of supplies from underneath the counter. Jimmy figured he must have stored it there at some point after the two of them had made their plan.

 “Of course, you know I’m always prepared.” Scott answered and then started rummaging through the bin. “I wasn’t sure what kind of thing you were going for so I just brought a little of everything.” Scott explained.

 “Oh, uh, I just figured I would leave that to you.” Jimmy said with a slight laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. “I-I wouldn’t know what looks good or anything.”

 Scott hummed and thought for a moment. He looked Jimmy up and down and then started his rummaging back up. He pulled out a small box, well, relatively, it was still a lot bigger than Jimmy, and then the lid for said box. “I think this box is cute. And it’s small but big enough to fit you comfortably inside.” Scott explained. Jimmy went up to it and looked it over. The box was cute, with little snowmen and snowflakes dotted around.

 “I think it’s perfect!” Jimmy said with a grin and so Scott grabbed a pin and poked a few, needle sized holes in the box so they wouldn’t have to worry about Jimmy losing air. Not that he should be in there long enough for that to happen but it was better to be safe than sorry. Scott put the box back down when he was finished and then looked between the box and Jimmy.

 “It’s still missing something though…” Scott trailed off and then went back to the bin. Jimmy simply watched as Scott pulled out an icey blue ribbon. “Here we go. I can wrap this over the box once you're inside.” Scott said.

 Jimmy looked between the ribbon and the box. The two really did fit perfectly together and it would keep the box together without having to use tape or anything like that. Jimmy nodded. “Sounds good! Are we…ready to do this then?” Jimmy asked, feeling a bit nervous all of a sudden.

 Scott hummed, once again in thought. He looked between the ribbon and Jimmy and the smirk that started appearing on his face made Jimmy’s heart rate spike. “Actually,” Scott started. “I think we can take this a step further.”

 And that was how Jimmy ended up tied up in the blue ribbon.

 Jimmy pulled against his binds, frowning slightly as it gave no give. Scott had carefully tied the ribbon around his chest, wound it down his legs, and then went back up to wrap it a few more times around his waist before tying the last little bit into a bow that rested in front of his stomach. He also made sure his arms were pinned at his sides as he tied Jimmy up, making his arms just as trapped as the rest of him and basically leaving him motionless. “Was this really necessary?” Jimmy asked, looking up at Scott.

 “Of course! You look so cute all wrapped up with a little bow.” Scott said with a small laugh as he adjusted the bow on Jimmy’s front slightly. “If you're giving yourself as a gift, then you gotta look the part.”

 Jimmy grumbled a bit and pulled against his restraints one last time before sighing. “I guess you’re right…”

 “I always am.” Scott said with far too much confidence. At least in Jimmy’s opinion. “Trust me, Tango and Skizz are going to love it.”

 “I hope so.” Jimmy said, more to himself than anything. 

 “Are you ready to get in now?” Scott asked and Jimmy nodded. Scott scooped the borrower up and gently slid him off his hand and into the box. With Jimmy now sat within, Scott lifted up the lid with the intent to put it on.

 “Oh, wait!” Jimmy suddenly said and watched as Scott froze. Concern crossed Scott’s features as he met Jimmy’s eyes.

 “Yeah? Is everything okay?” Scott asked and Jimmy smiled a bit. Despite how Scott could be sometimes, he still cared. Jimmy of course knew this but sometimes the reminder was nice.

 “Yeah, sorry, I just…thank you Scott, for…for helping me with this.” Jimmy said, his tone a bit shy as he glanced away from Scott’s eyes. Scott blinked but then smiled at him fondly, letting out a little sigh.

 “You know I’m always happy to help when it comes to you.” Scott’s smile turned more into a smirk as he winked at Jimmy. Jimmy felt his cheeks warm a bit. “And I’d say this is a long time coming anyway.” Scott continued, before he finally placed the lid over the little box. Jimmy was washed in darkness, his only bit of light coming from the needle sized holes Scott had poked through the box earlier. 

 There was some shuffling as Jimmy assumed Scott was wrapping the blue ribbon around the box. “There we go. Alright, I’m heading back out there now.” As Scott said this, Jimmy felt his stomach somersault as he suddenly felt himself being lifted into the air. Jimmy settled in quickly though, doing his best to stay quiet as Scott started to walk out of the kitchen area and back toward the front and main eating area of the restaurant.

 He thought back to Scott’s words as he squirmed slightly against the ribbon, feeling the smooth and cool silk against his skin. This really was a long time coming. Tango and Skizz had been offering up their place to him for months now. Ever since they discovered Jimmy within the walls of their restaurant, they had offered for him to come and live with them.

 Jimmy had said no every time. He was fine at the restaurant, it was his home and had been for three years now. And…it was one thing to see Tango and Skizz for short amounts of time during a work day and another thing entirely to actually live with them. And, to be honest, the thought still made him nervous. But over time, the more Jimmy spent time with them, the more Jimmy began to like the idea of seeing Skizz and Tango all the time.

 He had only just made up his mind a couple of weeks ago. He had initially planned on telling them that day, but that night, Tango and Skizz had stayed late at the restaurant to hang out and they ended up watching a movie on Tango’s phone. His humans had called it a Hallmark movie, which was apparently a really cheesy Christmas romcom. It was a fine movie but it was one scene in particular that sparked an idea in Jimmy’s head.

 In one of the scenes, the man held out a closed box to the women. At first, Jimmy thought he was proposing. But then the women opened it and it wasn’t a ring but a key. The man’s gift to the woman was inviting her to move in with him.

 And that’s what gave Jimmy the idea to gift himself to Tango and Skizz, as a way to tell them yes, he wanted to move in with them. Essentially, he would be the key.

 …Okay, so it was a bit of a silly idea. But Jimmy was known for doing silly things anyway and so he still decided to go for it. Jimmy ended up going to Scott, a friend of his who he met through Tango and Skizz, to help him with his idea. He went to Scott above the others because, while Scott would still tease him about the idea, he knew Scott would also help him and find the importance in what Jimmy wanted to do.

 And so, at Tango and Skizz’s yearly Christmas party that they hosted for all their friends at their restaurant, Jimmy and Scott put Jimmy’s plan into action.

 And now Jimmy was here, wrapped up and about to give himself to his two friends as a way to say, hey! I do want to live with you guys!

 …He really hoped this turned out well.

 He tuned back into his surroundings as he heard Scott speak from above him. “Wrapping things up then?” Scott asked, his voice casual. Jimmy realized then that the once loud sounds of the party had quieted considerably.

 “Yeah, it’s getting pretty late. And I know we all still have to get ready for actual Christmas.” Tango chuckled.

 “You two need help cleaning up?” Scott asked and Jimmy thought back briefly to the mess the restaurant had been in before he had disappeared with Scott. It would definitely take a while to clean up.

 “Nah.” Skizz’s voice chimed in. “We were just gonna leave it for tonight. We’re closed for the holiday’s anyway, so no reason to get things in shape yet. But we appreciate it!” Jimmy could just see the big grin on Skizz’s face and even the mental image of it made Jimmy smile too.

 “If you say so.” Scott chuckled and then Jimmy felt the box rattle a little more as he assumed Scott brought the box forward. “By the way, Jimmy wanted me to give you this.”

 “Oh?” Tango said, perking up. Jimmy felt the box switch hands. “A present from Jimmy?” He sounded excited.

 “A present from Jiggles!?” Skizz exclaimed with even more excitement.

 “Yep. I helped him out with it. But he said he wanted you two to wait until you got home to open it.” Scott said, telling them what Jimmy wanted him to. He wanted this to be a private moment between the three of them and so having them open him at home was the best way to do that. Besides, he thought it would have more meaning if they opened him in the place he would soon be living in.

 “Speaking of, have you seen Jimmy? He seems to have disappeared and we wanted to say goodbye before we headed out.” Tango asked, pulling the box closer to him as he did so. Jimmy only knew this from the sudden fluid motion and the now faint heartbeat he could just barely make out through the cardboard.

 “Actually, I think he went to bed already. Said he was really tired from all the excitement.” The other reason Jimmy got Scott’s help was because of how good of an actor he was. He lied to Tango and Skizz like it was nothing.

 “Aww man.” Skizz said with a pout. “I guess that’s fair though. This party probably had more humans than he’s ever dealt with at once.”

 “I guess we’ll just have to talk to him tomorrow.” Tango said, though he too sounded disappointed. Jimmy bit his lip, feeling a bit guilty about having Scott lie to them. But hopefully it would be worth it for the surprise.

 “Well, I’m heading out. It was a great time!” Scott said, his voice getting a bit fainter, more far away as Jimmy assumed he was walking toward the door.

 “See ya Scotty!” Skizz shouted.

 “And make sure you’re careful with that present! It’s fragile!” Scott yelled back one more time before Jimmy heard the familiar bell of the door open and soon close behind him.

 Jimmy continued to simply sit and listen as the rest of their friends left, the restaurant getting quieter and quieter until it was just Tango and Skizz (and Jimmy) left. “I guess it’s about time we headed out too.” Skizz said and Jimmy heard some shifting of items. Skizz must have just been doing a quick clean.

 “Yep, time to close up shop.” Tango said, despite their ‘shop’ being closed for most of the day already. Though at this point Jimmy knew it was more of a human expression than actually what Tango meant.

 As they started to move, so did the box, swaying him gently. As they entered outside, even from within the box, Jimmy could feel the cool night air nip at his skin. The ribbon, though covering a lot of him, still did little to keep out the cold. 

 Thankfully, they weren’t out in the cold for long. Jimmy soon heard the signs of a door opening and felt some rough movement that was quickly followed by Skizz’s voice. “Hey, careful! Scott said it was fragile, remember?” Neither of them had even been that rough but it was sweet that they cared so much about a gift he had given them. And that was without them knowing he was the one in there.

 “Right, sorry.” The slight tilt of the box was fixed and then the engine of the car roared to life. Jimmy jumped, surprised by the sudden noise. He had never been in a car before though he should have expected it to be loud.

 It got even louder as the music was turned on and Skizz started singing loudly to it, Tango jumping in shortly after some coaxing from Skizz. It was loud but Jimmy also couldn’t help but enjoy it. They sounded like they were having fun, singing and laughing. It was not unlike what he had seen while in the restaurant but here, right now, they seemed so much more…relaxed. Jimmy had only seen them like this a few times before. It was nice. He was excited to be able to see it all the time.

 The car ride wasn’t long. Tango and Skizz always told him they only lived about 20 minutes from the restaurant. So, before Jimmy knew it, the engine cut, the music turned off and the box he was in started to move again as both humans got out of the car. Jimmy pushed against his bindings slightly, his muscles starting to ache just a bit from his stiff position. Why had he let Scott tie him up again?

 Well, it didn’t matter too much now. Tango and Skizz would be opening the gift any moment now and he would be free soon enough.

 His heart pounded at the thought that after months of being asked, of weeks planning this whole thing to tell him he accepted, that this was finally happening.

 He was starting to second guess himself now, just a little bit. As Tango and Skizz entered their home, talking above him, Jimmy hoped this wasn’t the wrong way to go about this. Scott had liked the idea but would Tango and Skizz? He took a deep breath. He needed to calm down, there was no backing out of this now anyway.

 “Should we open up Jimmy’s present now?” Tango asked after a moment of hanging up their coats and toeing off their shoes. Tango’s tone was filled with barely contained excitement that had Jimmy’s heart racing.

 “Absolutely!” Skizz all but shouted, sounding just as excited as Tango and even more so than he had back at the restaurant. He could feel them walk a bit more before settling down again. Jimmy could only assume they were both sitting on a couch or something similar. “I can’t wait to see what Jiggles got us. What do you think it is?” Skizz asked after a moment and Jimmy could just picture the big grin on his face.

 “Not sure. Scott said he helped him out with it so the possibilities are all over the place.” Tango answered in reply and then Jimmy’s stomach did a little flip as the box was suddenly lifted up higher. “Thankfully, we don’t have to guess, cause we can open it right now.” Tango said with a laugh.

 “Right, let’s not waste anymore time!” Skizz exclaimed and with the brief silence that followed, Jimmy could just picture them untying the ribbon that wound around the box. Even if there was no audible indication that they were doing so. And then, the moment of truth, the lid of the box was carefully lifted off, drowning Jimmy in light as he suddenly found himself staring up at Tango and Skizz.

 Both humans’ eyes went wide as they saw Jimmy, Skizz’s mouth even fell open in shock. Jimmy cleared his throat, feeling his nerves spike. “Um, surprise?” Jimmy said, a little less enthusiastically than what he had initially planned but he was also a lot more nervous than he had been expecting.

 “Wha-Jimmy?” Tango said, leaning in just a bit more to get a better look at Jimmy within the box. “What are you doing in there?”

 “And why are you all tied up?” Skizz chimed in, shock and confusion overlapping each other as he leaned in on Jimmy’s other side, since Tango was the one holding the box.

 “Well, uh, Scott thought tying me up would make me more…present like.” Jimmy answered, a slight flush on his face. “It’s uh, starting to feel a bit uncomfortable though.”

 “Aww, well come here, let's get you untangled.” Skizz said before scooping Jimmy out of the box, shifting him to one hand as he started to untie the ribbon wrapped around Jimmy’s body. He pulled at one of the loose pieces on the bow and from there it seemed easy for Skizz to unwrap the rest of the ribbon. Jimmy shivered slightly at Skizz’s touch but he was mostly still.

 Tango put the box down onto the coffee table and leaned in close, watching. His brow furrowed but his features no less fond. “That still doesn’t explain what you were doing in there though.” Tango spoke up after a moment, just as Skizz pulled the rest of the ribbon off of Jimmy and placed it back in the box. Jimmy stretched his limbs and then turned to face Tango. He flushed and then quickly turned away, fidgeting with his hands as he looked down at them.

 “Well…remember how you've been asking me to move in with you guys?” Jimmy asked.

 “Yeah, but we understand why you’ve said no.” Skizz said, reassuring Jimmy of his previous responses.

 “We don’t want to force you to do anything you don’t want to.” Tango chimed in as well. Jimmy glanced up at the two of them, a small smile forming on his face. And that was exactly why he felt ready now to live with them. They had proven time and time again that they cared about him and they never treated him like any less of a person just because of his size. Even now they were reassuring him that he was in charge of himself and that they understood why Jimmy had said no to them in the past. And they had always respected his decision too. Never doing more than putting the offer back on the table every once in a while.

 They really were the best.

 He took a deep breath.

 “I know, and I really appreciate that.” Jimmy looked up at the two humans fully. “But this whole thing is…me gifting myself to you guys. As a way to say that I want to live with you two and be a full part of your lives.” There, it was out in the open now. Jimmy felt his heart flutter with nerves but they were quickly reassured as two giant grins formed on Skizz and Tango’s faces.

 “Really?” Tango said, his tone full of barely contained excitement. Jimmy could practically see him trying his hardest not to bounce up and down from it.

 “Yes!” Skizz exclaimed, not trying as hard to subdue his reaction. “Oh Jimmy, dude, we are going to have a blast with you living here.” Skizz said, his grin big. Jimmy couldn’t help but match it.

 “I’m excited for it.” Jimmy said, looking at his two humans fondly. “Thank you for offering.”

 “Thank you for accepting.” Tango said and then gently scooped him up off of Skizz’s hands so he could hold him close. “I think I speak for both Skizz and I when I say this is the best present we’ve ever gotten.”

 “Oh, by a mile!” Skizz responded with a laugh.

 Jimmy smiled fondly at the two as they started talking about setting up a space for Jimmy and what kind of stuff they could plan for their first Christmas all together. As they talked, Tango continued to hold Jimmy up against his chest, his thumb subconsciously rubbing at his back. Jimmy sighed in relief as he leaned into the touch, wondering how he had ever been worried about what the outcome of this would be. Of course they would be happy, they were amazing.

 As their voices washed over him, excited and coming up with idea after idea on how to include Jimmy in their lives, Jimmy knew he had made the right choice.

[writtenbyyunjin]

ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 COLLISION OF LOVE

PAIRING : huh yunjin x fem! reader ( wlw )

GENRE : fluff, gl

SYNOPSIS : you are a student who has a huge crush on your literature teacher, which is also the sweetest yet the hottest from the whole college and only your close friends knows about this.

WARNINGS : teacher x student trope! ( gl )

__________________________________________

monday, it was your first class of the morning; litterature, with your amazing teacher, a woman named huh yunjin, who is only 3 years older than you. since the beginning of the school year, you can’t help but find this woman definitely attractive, even hot. and in less than a month, you directly had the biggest crush ever on her. but it’s not like anybody can blame you, boys and girls are literally turning around her and try their best to catch her attention. she is like “aphrodite’s lost daughter” and “the incarnation of a goddess” as you say multiple times to your friends, which are always tired about all the discussions that goes always about her, and they say things like “you know it’s not right to have feelings for this woman, she’s your teacher!” and stuff like that, but you didn’t care at all. you knew it wasn’t right, but honestly, can you help it?

it was the beginning of the class, and when miss huh started the lesson, you can’t help but secretly admire her from head to toe. how her siren glasses would suits her so perfectly, how her hair were even brighter than usual, how her skirt highlights her curves, and much more. for you, she was the incarnation of the word “perfect”. but as the minutes passes by, you can’t help but start to feel your eyes becoming heavy. poor you who have spent the whole night fantasising about her. she was hunting your mind the whole night. and now, you’re found out being completely tired and sleepy. so, after few minutes, you slowly fell asleep on your table. obviously, yunjin have noticed it but she didn’t comment it and just simply smiled a bit before continuing her lesson.

as the bell rings, you obviously don’t hear it and while miss huh allow her students to leave the classroom. she make sure that everyone have left before she made her way towards your table and have put her two hands on your table as she went closer until your ear and whispered in a soft tone : “hey it’s time to wake up”. as she says this, she sees that you doesn’t react or not even move a finger, so she tries again as she went back closer to your ear and whispered in a sweet tone : “sleepyhead, wake up”. and when she says this, you slowly wake up and start to rub your eyes softly a bit before you look around you and you are directly met by yunjin’s face which was just centimetres away from yours, and when you notice her being so close to you, you immediately look away completely embarrassed and flustered, and yunjin can’t help but find you cute in this situation, so all she does is giggling before saying : “someone’s flustered?”.

as she asks this, you suddenly feel your heart about to explode from your chest as you feel as well your cheeks becoming pinky. as yunjin sees that you doesn’t answer but at the contrary continue to avoid any eyes contact with her, she leans even closer to you and with her fingers, she gently place them on your chin before she lift it so you are obligated to look at her in the eyes. when you do so, you feel like the whole world stopped for a moment, you instantly got lost in her eyes. you are so lost in her eyes that you don’t even notice that she asked you something, and suddenly, you can’t help but take a quick glance at her lips, but at the end, you look at them the whole time. when yunjin notices it, she immediately smirk a bit before she lick her lips, and this simple move was enough for making your heart full of butterflies. she says in a teasing tone : “someone’s hungry, are we?”. when she says this, you immediately look back at her in the eyes as you don’t have any strength to reply to her. then, she continues to speak as she leans dangerously closer to your face, and your lips by the same occasion : “you know, i always wondered how your lips would taste…”. as she says this, it makes your heart skipping a beat and the most when she stopped right in front of your lips, they were just few inches from each other, and finally, you see her eyes lingering to your lips, and it was the move to made your legs shaking a bit. you try your best to stop it, but you can’t. and when yunjin notices it, she puts one of her hand on your thigh and then say in a soft yet command tone that makes your whole body shivers : “i know you want it too, i see in every classes how your devouring me with your eyes… tell me that you wanna kiss me”. at her words, you can’t help but bite your lips for a minute before immediately replying to her as you take a glance at her lips : “i.. i wanna kiss you, so bad”. yunjin can’t help but find how cute you are in this situation, completely flustered yet nervous at the same time. so she doesn’t waits any longer and smile to you softly before she finally press her lips against yours, and you immediately give the kiss back to her and kiss her more passionately for few minutes, and you swear that these few minutes are the best of your whole existence. it was like each other’s lips were made for each other, it matches perfectly. while you continued to kiss, you suddenly wrap one of your hand around her neck and you swear that you heard yunjin giggling a little bit and as you feel her kissing you even more due to this little gesture, you can’t help but feel fireworks in your heart.

after few minutes, yunjin is the first who breaks the kiss as she gasp for her, and when she move her lips away from yours, you immediately miss her lips against yours. the way her lips were matching yours so well, the way your lips were dancing with each other. then, she looks at you directly in the eyes, and this time, it seems like her eyes have changed. you could definitely read love and affection in them, and it made your heart reading. for few seconds, she admired you in silence before she place a hand in your hair and started to caress it softly before she says in a soft whisper : “i love you..” when you hear those words, you feel your whole heart beating faster than before and you can’t help but smile to her brightly and since you’re all happy about this, you immediately kiss her on her cheek and then hug her tightly, which makes her chuckling a bit as she says in a teasing tone : “hey, don’t worry, i won’t escape.. sleepyhead”. as she says this, you suddenly realised how tightly you are holding her, so you immediately let her breathing for a minute before you look at her in the eyes, and you two make an eye contact, full of love and admiration towards each other.

after few seconds, you finally wrap yours arms around her neck so you bring her closer to your face and look at her in the eyes before you lays to her lips and say : “i love you much more”. and after you’ve said that, you start to go closer to her lips as the both of your lips were just millimeters away from each other, you were about to kiss her, but unfortunately, the two of us hear a knock on the door, which makes you sigh silently of frustration. so, you just bite your lips a bit and move away gently from yunjin, before she also sighs and gets up as you also do so and when she notices your sad expression on your face, she quickly cup your face with your hands and say in a soft tone with a bright smile that makes your heart flutters away : “hey, don’t be sad, we’ll see each other soon okay?”. after she said this, she gives you a quick kiss on your forehead, what makes you smiling again, before she quickly goes to her desk and start to write something on a little paper before she gives it to you and say with a little smirk : “here’s my number, i knew you would ask me”. after she said this, you can’t help but chuckle a bit before you put it in your pocket and she doesn’t even have the change to add anything that you suddenly start to kiss her passionately, which takes her few seconds to understand what’s happening before she directly replies to your kiss and give it to you back quickly as she places her hands on your hips. after few seconds, you break the kiss and yunjin move away her hands from your hips and the both of you make your way to the door of the classroom before you say with a smile to her : “see you later, i love you”. and after you’ve said this, she smiles to you brightly and give you a last kiss on your forehead before she opens the door of the classroom as her students were already waiting for her, and as you make your way away of her classroom as she greets her students and let them enter the classroom, you turn around and see her giving you a wink with a little smirk before you smile to her and then she closes the door of her classroom while you leave the college basement, happier than ever…

[felassan]

Some more DA:TV and related snippets from Sylvia Feketekuty, Part 2. rest of post under a cut due to length and spoilers. [Post One, Post Three]

The dev team really wanted to deliver on Emmrich's romance [source]

Sylvia Feketekuty has now left BioWare so there are likely some things she can't answer now "just because I can't look them up with certainty anymore" [source]

When Emmrich is first introduced, he has a skull helmet. Why does it never ever appear for the next 40-100 hours? "The helmet does indeed look wicked! I believe it actually shows up on his shelf in the Lighthouse eventually. (If I had been a smarter writer I would've asked if we could have it appear again, that one's on me.)" [source]

User: "In another post you mentioned shops in Nevarra City near the Necropolis. How far IS Nevarra City itself is from the Necropolis? Do only senior MWs get to go?" / Sylvia: "I'm reluctant to say what the distance is since I never defined it in game so it's Unknown™. But I imagine they can either walk or take a carriage, depending. Also I never imagined junior MWers are forbidden from going into town or such. It could be they have set hours and times where they're allowed. But got to get all those chores done first..." [source, two]

On the DA:I goat scene ([link]) - "The GOAT! God bless them, that was a delight." [source]

Brian J. Audette, on [this thread] - ""Better late than never" addendum to this thread. I just noticed that Isle of the Gods' writer Sylvia is on here now and I'd be remiss not to tag her in this thread. I can't say enough wonderful things about having worked with Sylvia on this mission." [source] / Sylvia: "Thanks Brian! You tackled an absolutely jam-packed mission with aplomb." [source]

Jo Berry: "Thank you for everything and everything else, on both Veilguard and Inquisition. Sunlight on your road, wherever it goes." [source] / Sylvia: "Thank YOU for all your writing Jo. Seriously, you were a godsend on Veilguard and DAI both." [source]

Trick Weekes: "It's been fantastic working with you, Sylvia, and I know you're going to crush it with whatever you do next. Thank you for finally letting me make you "the person who has to do journals so Trick doesn't" on one of our projects." [source] / Sylvia: "Thank you Trick! I'll miss working with you. It was an honour to finally be given the awesome responsibility of the journal system that still haunts my dreams." [source]

John Epler: "sylvia did you see i told the world Emmrich sleeps standing up like a horse" [source] / Sylvia: "It's days later but: yes. Yes I did." [source]

User: "As someone who also has a truly debilitating fear of death, Emmrich is so special to me. It’s the first time I’ve ever seen it represented in such a clear and concise way." / Sylvia: "Thanks, definitely felt that fear myself. I really wanted to express it clearly and was hoping would resonate with others." [source]

User: "Do you have any thoughts or opinions on what nickname Emmrich might have gotten from Varric if he'd ever gotten one?" / Sylvia: "Oh man that's a good question, but ultimately since I didn't write Varric, that must remain a mystery. Nicknames can only be bestowed. ("Bones" like someone suggested below is funny though.)" [source]

User: "If Emmrich's hobby is alchemy/plants, Vorgoth's is art, and Audric's is architecture... what's Myrna's? (Next to Emmrich, she's my favorite Watcher - sorry Vorgoth!)" / Sylvia: "Myrna has a one off line, you may not have heard it yet, where she talks to Vorgoth about getting tickets to the Sword of Drakon.* She enjoys a night out at the theater, whether it's a play or an opera. *(I think that's the play I named, I hope I'm recalling my own line haha.) It's a bit indulgent of me, but I chose Sword of Drakon because it was one of the plays I made up for a series of codices in DAI about Orlesian theater. I had a lot of fun with these and wanted to give them life once more. [link]" [source, two]

User: "During Rook’s disappearance in the prison, how did Emmrich react? Considering their intense romance, did he fall into depression, or did he show a more vulnerable side? Could his fear of death have influenced the situation? In the immortal romance💀, Emmrich promises that nothing will separate them, not in this world or any other. How likely is that? Would he go to great lengths for Rook, even crossing boundaries? Or, at some point, would he accept Rook's death?" / Sylvia: "1) Very strongly! I think it's a bit more interesting if I leave details to your imaginations, but Emmrich feels things deeply and probably had some sleepless nights. 2) So this I can't say much on even though it's a juicy topic. The truth is, I wouldn't even know unless I was actually sitting down to write it. Again, Emmrich feels things very passionately, but this is the kind of scenario where I might want the player's choices to have an effect." [source, two]

User: "Any chance that color scheme [of Emmrich's coat] was based off the corpse flower?" / Sylvia: "I couldn't find anything on the colour scheme and the corpse flower. Afraid this one's a mystery to me." [source]

User: "I'm really curious if there's a Nevarrese language? We have Orlesian, Antivan, Tevene, Qunlat..." / Sylvia: "I wondered that myself, especially given its ancient ties with Tevinter and also Orlais which would certainly have affected the languages of power and influence. Could also have roots with the Planasene. We never talked about one though, as far as I know, so the answer remains...unknown. 💀 (I did introduce tomb-script, the language you see etched into stone in the Necropolis, but I thought of it as more of a specialist's language for occult and magical things specifically.) (If we did define a Nevarran language in some corner of the lore, now I'm going to feel embarrassed, but I don't BELIEVE we did.)" [source, two, three]

User: "I wanted to ask if you have anything you can share about MW grave dowry jewellery - is it the sort of thing they keep on at all times? Also, would Emmrich like jewellery gifts or give them to Rook?" / Sylvia: "I figured it would be something they wear most of the time, or at least in public. You don't want to be without your grave-gold if you pass away! Emmrich would love to get jewellery, especially if it marked a special occasion like his other pieces do! He'd also probably like to gift Rook a piece of grave gold himself, though he knows a non-MW Rook might look at that part askance." [source, two]

User: "Question: how much if anything can you tell us about the circumstances surrounding the emergence of Emmrich's magic and him going to the Mourn Watch? In my mind, his parents' death could certainly be a catalyst for the emergence of mage powers, but I'm so curious why the butcher's boy goes to what seems the equivalent of Nevarran Harvard instead of a regular Circle unless he immediately demonstrated outstanding ability?" / Sylvia: So timeline wise, I think his magic manifested after he was taken in. This part isn't canon, so much as a background thought I had that maybe the spirits of the Necropolis nudged the MW to scoop up this future corpse-whisperer. It seems like a kind of place ripe for that sort of omen. That said, it could've also been a kindhearted Watcher who saw how shattered and alone this young boy was, and thought an upbringing in the Grand Necropolis would be the better place to deal with his grief. It's the kind of thing I want to leave open unless someone goes back one day to fill it out!" [source, two]

User: "what’s the overall Mourn Watch opinion on the whole Weekend at King Markus’s the other Mortalitasi are pulling? I can’t blame Emmrich for not wanting to be involved with that political mess!" / Sylvia: "No clue what you're talking about. King Markus is in the finest of health!!!!! ahahahahaha (To my mind Emmrich's response indicates a tension between the orders, but that they're going along with the polite fiction to avoid a mess. I can't say what the future holds though.)" [source]

User: "Ah, one last note: whoever decided “DA liches are immortal protectors and not always evil?” Chef’s kiss. It’s all I’ve ever wanted!" / Sylvia: "Thanks again! It was in Emmrich's first draft. The other writers and editors gave me good feeback on lichdom and the philosophy behind it especially" [source]

User: "I'm an ICU nurse, and that is imagined to confer a comfort with mortality. Suffice to say Emmrich has been a huge comfort to see." / Sylvia: "Thanks so much. I really wanted him to struggle with it while also engaging with it, because it's something I find hard as well. And I hoped it would find purchase with players." [source]

User: "If you’re willing, can you share a bit about the other orders within the Mortalitasi? Is there a rivalry with the Tevinter Imperium?" / Sylvia: I'm afraid I don't have much, sorry. I left the other Mortalitasi orders a big open canvas in case we wanted to invent more some day. (We've mentioned the palace Mortalitasi are separate from the Mourn Watch, so there's one. As you probably caught, Emmrich's not a fan of theirs.) Is there a rivalry with the Tevinter Imperium? I can't really point to anything in the game talking about that, so I hesitate to call it canon. But to my mind it would be very natural and also very funny. So if that ever manifests, I approve." [source, two]

User: "was any of Emmrich's design or personality modeled on British actor David Niven? I think there is resemblance just wondering if that was intentional." / Sylvia: "Oh I love David Niven. But the more direct actor influence for me was Peter Cushing in a few old Hammer Horror films." [source]

User: "just wanted to say thank you for creating the character of Josephine in Inq!! Helped me learn some stuff about myself when I was younger and meant a lot." / Sylvia: "Thank you so much on all counts! I'm glad the lovely Lady Montilyet was there for you (and enormous credit to her actor, Allegra Clark. She absolutely nailed Josephine, straight away.)" [source]

User, on Emmrich: "He mentions he thought he would marry - is that permitted for Mortalitasi when it wasn't for regular Circle mages? Can they now raise their own children?" / Sylvia: Mortalitasi have a lot of power. I imagine the Nevarran Chantry might grant them permission to marry outside the Circle more regularly than in places where mages are given less respect. (Mages can also marry within Circles, so no permission needed in those cases.) The same might be true for mages raising mage-born children in Nevarra, but I say that with less certainty. I think that's a topic I would've wanted to discuss with the rest of the narrative team." [source, two]

User: "is there a particular reason why emmrich is always wearing a glove on one hand?" / Sylvia: "I like to think it's mostly because he works a lot with his hands. The glove seems useful if he has to, say, grip a rough outcrop of rock when traversing the Necropolis, or deal with a bitey corpse." [source]

User, on Emmrich: "On my 1st run I played a trans Rook and romanced him. It felt incredible how he was so accepting of Rook's identity, and in return she could support him as he did a transition of his own as well. Beautiful mirroring!" / Sylvia: "Thanks very much! If those scenes worked, it's thanks to some people at work who kindly gave feedback that helped get the tone right." [source]

User: "I've been wanting to thank you for writing Luck in the Gardens for 4 years. Hollix was the first time I ever saw a non-binary character given a real voice." / Sylvia: "I loved writing Hollix in that story, they were a treat, and I'm glad they meant a lot to you. (And a shout out to a nb friend who gave me some good feedback on the character, I don't think the story would've been as clear without their help.)" [source]

User: "I was curious about Audric from TN, and if he originally was planned to have an appearance in veilguard, and what he's up to now" / Sylvia: "Love Audric, but I never planned to bring him into VG. I'm not AGAINST it, but I didn't want the short stories to feel like required reading for the game, and I liked where his arc ended in DatDM. That said, I dropped in a few references to Audric to let people know he's around and well. And I imagine he's doing what he loves: being a force of order, in the library. (And reading books during the more quiet hours below.)" [source, two]

User: "As a consumer of (and probably future creator of) so called "erotic" fanficfion, I'm wondering how you feel about the fact that fans make it about a character you created?" / Sylvia: "No issues with it whatsoever. We put sex and romance into the game itself, after all. I think people use fan art and fanfiction to extend their time with a story they've grown fond of, or to figure things out. So it feels like a natural extension of that." [source]

User: "Maybe one day my rook will join the mw!" / Sylvia: "Well, the Grand Necropolis is always eager for more company...🪦👻" [source]

User: "did the flame eternal (short story) come first or the flame eternal (quest)? i’ve been wondering if the quest was named after the story or vice versa" / Sylvia: "I wrote the scene first, the short story came after. But I named the quest AFTER the short story had come out, so I'd say the quest is named for the story because I liked the callback." [source]

User: "1.I know John answered already that Emmrich sleeps like a horse but is there really no bed for this man? 2.How would he react to a bouquet made for him?" / Sylvia: "1. Unknown. Perhaps he brings out pillows and a blanket for the slab in his room (after scrubbing it, of course!) Perhaps he goes home to an elaborate silk-covered bed in his Necropolis apartments. Or the horse thing. (TBH: I never decided myself, so I've leaned into impish mystery). 2. Emmrich would be absolutely delighted and flattered by being presented with a flower bouquet." [source, two]

User: "I hope it's okay to pop here but it might interest you to know a lot of us have been headcanoning that he has a secret bedroom behind one of his bookshelves! It seemed to line up with his sensibilities somewhat." / Sylvia: "That would honestly be great. Pull out the right book and snooze time." [source]

User, on the cemetery date: "This makes me feel like Mourn Watchers include the dead in important personal milestones/events and, if so, I love that so much. Like they want to share these events and the joy/love/excitement/etc. with those who have passed (and perhaps linger.)" / Sylvia: "That's absolutely how I thought of it too." [source]

User: "was there any game/book/show/film that inspired the Mourn Watch and Emmrich? When I saw them in the preview content, I got reminded of the Locked Tomb series by Tamsyn Muir and playing through the game cemented those vibes." / Sylvia: "I hadn't read any Locked Tomb when writing Emmrich, I think we must both just have impeccable taste. (I actually tried to stay away from contemporary stuff on necromancy when writing him, out of a superstitious fear I'd be unduly influenced. I do want to talk about influences later though!)" [source]

User, on Josie: "Do you think she’s open to having kids/adopting with the Inquisitor? Lord Ontranto and Yvette are so ahead!" / Sylvia: "I think that falls firmly within the category of what you imagine she and your Inquisitor's romance looks like, which means: absolutely, if that's where you imagine life would take them." [source]

User: "Emmrich, his story & everything surrounding him absolutely played a huge part in helping to lift me up & connecting me with new friends online" / Sylvia: "Thank you! And I'm very glad to hear Emmrich and his fellow Watchers helped you out when you needed it. He'd be pleased to know so himself." [source]

User: "Was it ever considered for him to appear in the game?" / Sylvia: "(short answer is no, but I wanted to let people know Audric's doing well.)" [source]

User: "I enjoyed your short stories in Tevinter Nights. Emmrich mentioned working out in the morning. What does his morning routine look like, and what kind of exercise does he do?" / Sylvia: "Thanks so much! Those stories have a special place in my heart, so that's especially nice to hear. On exercise: He likes a brisk stroll, and does morning stretches, and for something more strenuous, he likes to go swimming. Why? It's a workout where you don't have to worry about sweating. That just seemed to align with his fastidiousness in a funny way to me. (I also imagine exploring the Necropolis keeps him active, climbing all those stairs and crumbling ledges and the outsized walls of hallowed tombs, etc.)" [source, two]

User: "Harding will turn to a MW Rook who's been talking nerdy necro shop with Emmrich, and goes (paraphrasing), "You're so different when you're talking about this stuff than you are when you hang out with us!" and I loved that" / Sylvia: "Yes indeed! And thanks. I really wanted a beat where you realize MW Rook has learned to swap between being a fancy nerd and talking a bit more like "regular" people in Thedas. It seemed like a fun trait for that background." [source]

Sylvia, on how she came to BioWare: "No formal training. The closest to practice I had was running tabletop RPGs for friends, which actually helped me a lot with understanding the different kind of RPG players out there and what people want out of a story. And honestly: I just kept applying, over and over. That was my main virtue. I was rejected the first couple times I applied to BW. And rightly, I think, I wasn't ready and practicing in between really helped me become a stronger writer." [source, two]

Some more on this topic ^ from Sylvia: "To be honest: mostly luck, some perseverance, and then writing skills, in that order. I was rejected at least twice from BW before I got in, and I think they were right to do so. I wasn't ready yet. The third round someone I knew passed on my sample to a writer there, I did two more rounds of samples while taking feedback and revising over the next month. And then I was lucky enough they liked it enough to interview me. I wish I had better advice than perseverance. I think having a small, completed game, even something text based or a mod, isn't bad either. Even if it's short, it shows you finished it. But: my entry was over 15 years ago now, and to be honest I'm not sure what BW's applicant process are anymore. I don't want to be discouraging though. I would say keep applying, and make friends with like minded people who also want to make games, and best of luck." [source, two, three, four]

User: "I've been wondering something about Mourn Watch Rook's background - their bio says they were found as a baby + raised by the MW, and they reference it in-game, but then they also say they were a street kid and left their old life behind to join the MW to Taash. I'm just curious how one - being raised by the MW - lead to the other - street kid era. I just hc'd it as a euphemism for my Rook's party girl phase lol but it did leave me a little confused." / Sylvia: "This is a case of the background changing slightly over time, and me not squaring it in time with dialogue. In my mind: MW IS found by the Mourn Watch, raised by them, and work for them. But MW Rook also had period(s?) growing up where they explored Nevarra city, to explain why they're more. street savvy and worldly than your typical Watchers who never leave the city. I've seen people noting some discrepancies, and in a perfect world I would've caught those lines in time to smooth them out to encompass the whole story. But perhaps your Rook gives slightly different answers to different people for their own, mysterious reasons! (Or, in reality, it's writer error.)" [source, two, three] "Anyhow, I encourage any head canons that help square these discrepancies" [source]

User: "I romanced him on a Rook that I perceived as about 42ish and my running interpretation of the lines acknowledging her being young were either Emmrich not realizing how old she is, a running bit between them, or some cute form of flattery to not remind her of her own age haha" / Sylvia: "That's adorable, I love it" [source]

User: "1. What would Josie's ideal date be? 2. Could adopted kids be heir of the Montilyet estate or would it go to Yvette? 3. What does Josie think of the Crows?" / Sylvia: "1. I think she'd try to structure something, but the Inquisitor taking her away from her strictly scheduled routine to relax would actually be better for her. A picnic in a garden, a stroll around a lake followed by a meal in a quiet little restaurant. Something with a soft evening. 2. I don't think I ever said so in the game, but to my mind Josephine had some nieces and nephews in line to be heir. If she adopted a child and thought they'd be a better candidate, they could absolutely inherit the estate. (And of course, she could bequeath money or personal effects as she liked.) 3. She thinks of them as a necessity in Antiva, and that it's important to appease them. There's probably highly placed Crows she would get along with. But she'd never be comfortable with them. At the end of the day they're contract killers, and she's no lover of violence. (If I actually DID mention who Josephine had lined up to inherit the estate after her, but just forgot, I will ask for mercy because the game came out over 10 years ago.)" [source, two, three, four]

User: "Would you ever consider making a playlist on spotify of the sort of music you could picture Emmerich listening to? Or perhaps sharing any of the music you listened to while writing Emmrich?" / Sylvia: "I actually have an itunes playlist of what I listened to when writing Emmrich on my old computer. If I dig it out, I'll post a screenshot! (A lot of ambient stuff, probably unsurprisingly)" [source]

User: "I utterly, completely adore the way Josephine was written, she's such a wonderful and complex character. Her history as a bard, her ruthlessness, her kindness and sweet nature and how CUTE her romance is." / Sylvia: "Lady Montilyet herself would be flattered to hear you liked it." [source]

User, on Sylvia's comment about Peter Cushing being a go-to for what Emmrich would be like: "This makes me so unbelievably happy given my love for Peter Cushing 😭 my love for Emmrich was inevitable." / Sylvia: "I want to talk a little more about it later but Cushing was such a wonderful actor. Wish we'd had him around even longer." [source]

User, on death and working in death care: "In the end, it’s always about memory." / Sylvia: "That's so true. We want to be remembered, or to have something that lets people know even a little about who we are. (It's why I'm glad newspapers still print obituaries, you can read about the most amazing lives.)" [source]

User: "I was starting to think the game was reading my mind and tailoring to me once he said his favorite color was lilac, and I was given the option to say darker purple." / Sylvia: "I'm glad you enjoyed Emmrich and his romance. And that the bit about colours worked for you, I was trying to think of what would be something fun there, and purple is one of my favorites too. (Fine taste!)" [source]

User: "“Down Among the Dead Men” is one of my favorite chapters from Tevinter Nights. I loved Audric and I was so happy when Myrna mentioned him in Veilguard! Was there any chance he might’ve appeared in game?" / Sylvia: "basically I didn't plan it, but I wanted to let TN readers know Audric is living well" [source]

User: "If Hezenkoss was also you ALL of that was a sheer stroke of brilliance!" / Sylvia: "Thank you! Hezenkoss was me, so glad you liked her. She was a blast to write. Oh my god, I meant to write Hezenkoss was one of my favorites not "me". (I think I snipped out something and consequentially sound like a maniac in that post above. SORRY. She is not me, I wish I had that kind of confidence.)" [source, two]

User, on behalf of their friend: "Well, spontaneously I'd be interested if she can say any more about Emmrich's past romances. Was there someone really serious among them, or all just fun and casual? I'm also curious how the whole mage training works in Nevarra. Are some trained from the start by the Mourn Watch or does everyone go to the Mortalitasi equivalent of a Circle first?" / Sylvia: "1. I think there was probably a mix of more serious romances and more casual ones over Emmrich's life. The serious ones just never panned out. (Until Rook, if you're romancing him.) 2. I pictured the MW taking in promising members from other circles, but I left their selection criteria vague on purpose, in case we needed to define it later. Of course, there's also exceptions. We've seen they take in some orphans or foundlings (MW Rook and Emmrich, for example) when fate, chance, or pity allows it. (I had an idea spirits might sometimes nudge MWers to take in someone, but that's not in the game, so it remains, I suppose now, my own head canon.)" [source, two, three, four]

User: "Emmrich is every bit the warm and kind academic that I looked up to in my undergrad/postgrad days, and I have taken time in the game just to wander the Grand Necropolis and take everything in." / Sylvia: "My pleasure, and thanks very much for saying so. (Props to all my teammates, it took a lot of people to bring those characters and places to life, and they were all so enthusiastic about our weird gothy corner of Thedas.)" [source]

User, on Emmrich's dream: "One of few cases where writers don't go for "actually immortality is lame" lesson to appease the audience for whom immortality is unattainable. Refreshing to have a character who wants to live forever, can do it, and it isn't treated as a mistake. One of the boldest bits of writing in the game." / Sylvia: "Thanks Mary - that was one of my aims, because so many times in stories, immortality is a fool's errand. I wanted it to have its rules, and its price, but not something disastrous or out of reach." [source]

User: "The MW as a whole was beautifully done and the way they handle life and death was deeply healing and aided tremendously in my own personal journey with grief." / Sylvia: "I'm very glad meeting Emmrich and the Watchers helped even a little, that means a lot to hear." [source]

User: "Amazing work in veilguard and inquisition honestly and the flame eternal was such a fun read! Unless it’s been answered before my query is where do the Mourn watchers live/sleep? Is it a case of they live in the higher parts of the Necropolis or do they live in the city and commute?" / Sylvia: "Flame Eternal was a fun one, hadn't written a story that short before but I enjoyed introducing Johanna and Emmrich's dynamic back in their good old days... As to your question, there's one line of banter between Emmrich and Neve that talks about this (so, very easy to miss.) The Mourn Watchers live and sleep in the upper (safer) levels of the Necropolis." [source, two]

User: "does mortal!Emmrich return to the Necropolis or spend more time in the world first? He plays detective with Neve & camps in Ferelden with Harding feels like he’d want to experience more of the world before returning home." / Sylvia: "Impossible for me to say what the future will hold with certainty, but I think Emmrich's enjoying exploring the world too much to go back to living in the Necropolis full time just yet. He'd certainly want to keep visiting regularly, but there's so much more to see." [source]

Sylvia: "The Watchers have a special place in my heart." [source]

User: "I just wanted to say how much I love Emmrich" / Sylvia: "Thank you very much! I'm so glad to hear you enjoyed getting to know him." [source]

at this point tumblr stopped letting me add to this post !

[echojays]

── .✦ date night 

✮ . ⠂ phillip graves x reader 

wc; 1.3k 

summary; a dinner date with phillip has you reminiscing about the first time you met. 

warnings; reader wears a dress and a necklace but no female pronouns are used? does this count as fem reader ? idk . 

a/n; smbody sent in an ask saying how much they liked the other fic but i deleted it on accident and i can't get it back and i actually like threw my hands above my head in grief and guilt at my actions. sorry anon. this one is for you. sorry it took so long to write also !! i have actually been crashing out and getting throttled by my bpd and also transferring colleges and fighting for my life in general so i have not been able to write at all. but we persevere in the name of phillip graves x reader fanfiction. amen.

— — —

His hands are warm as they brush against the nape of your neck. They’re always warm. He’s always warm. The man could be a fucking space heater with the temperature he’s constantly running. 

Your eyes flick up to his reflection in the mirror— he’s lasered in on getting this damn necklace clasped. He furrows his brow as he misses the chain loop with the clasp again, shuffling a little closer as he lets out an aggravated huff. He’s not used to being so wholly gentle with you. You give him grace. 

He’s getting practice in— you’ll give him that, too. You wake up to coffee and a kiss most mornings when he's home, and he’ll scratch your back if you toss and turn in bed for too long (which, by his definition, is any amount of time at all). You conclude that gentleness is something not learnt all at once. The same man you’ve watched disassemble and clean a gun with a precision you didn’t know was possible has just fumbled getting this necklace around your neck for the third time in a row. 

You’d offer to do it yourself, but you know better than that. It’s a matter of his pride at this point.

It’s four more tries until he finally gets it. He throws his hands up like he just won the lottery before kissing the back of your neck. 

“Jesus Christ. I’m never doing that again.”

You smile at his reflection as he meets your gaze in the mirror. There’s a long moment of silence as he appreciates the sight of you. He snakes his arms around your waist and hooks his head over your shoulder, and there’s a selfishly longer moment of silence as he appreciates the sight of you with him. 

“Look at us.”

You have been. You raise an eyebrow. 

“What about us?”

“Pretty couple.” He states simply, pulling away to grab his car keys off the dresser and spinning them around his finger. “You ready to roll?”

Everything on the way to the restaurant reminds you of your first date.

You remember that evening perfectly well, both of you a bit more timid and a hell of a lot younger. It was a blind date a mutual friend had set up, which scared the hell out of both of you. You weren’t entirely sure what to make of each other at first. You certainly weren’t sure what to make of his beat-up Silverado when you saw it pulling into your driveway. But the date went perfectly, and the one after that, and the one after that. The truck, you soon learnt, didn’t matter— the boy that drove it around was a keeper. 

At some point you convinced him to retire it get a new one. The new one was lifted, much to his delight and much to your dismay, especially as you’re practically crawling up the side of it in your dress to get in the front seat. His hand finds the small of your back as he helps you up and in. The door shuts beside you, and the car is silent for a moment. You fold your hands in your lap and look down at the ring on your finger. 

Things changed— like they always do— after the two of you met. He wasn’t a marine anymore, he was a CEO. A commander. New paychecks. New truck. New house. New scars. Coming home with a fresh red line across his cheek and a bit of his ear gone. You plainly remember getting upset about how close of a call it must have been. Taking his head in your hands and staring at it. Contemplating how near whatever caused it came to striking him through the head. 

You kissed it and told him he pulled it off well. He remembers that. 

He shuts the driver’s side door and the truck rumbles to life. His hand finds your thigh on instinct, idling there as he pulls out of the driveway and starts down the state road out from the house. That’s another thing that’s changed, you count,— is that six or seven?— it all feels a lot more natural than the first time. You both sit in silence the entire car ride, but it’s not the same awkward, unsure silence that you two tried desperately to fill on the first date. 

There’s nothing either of you can think to discuss and that is perfectly okay with the both of you. Your hand rests on his as you watch the trees go by. 

He glances at you out of the corner of his eye. 

Time with you doesn’t need anything particularly exciting, anything spurring it forward and keeping it full. Initially, all the showmanship he loves very much was good cover for how horribly smitten he was over you. Remarkably, he found, it worked. You were enticed, charmed, and unbeknownst to him, saw straight through the flamboyant bullshit and determined to rip it all away.

You met him— the real him— in bits and pieces as he let them show. You fell in love with him again and again. 

Unfortunately, he still very much enjoys getting a rise out of you. Him and his smart mouth are a package deal. 

He pulls into the lot and helps you out of the truck. The restaurant is, as you note out loud before stepping inside, “fancy as hell”. 

You’re seated quickly in a small booth in the back corner, the candle in the middle of the table lighting up both of your faces. You smile softly at him. He grins. You can’t tell if he’s about to say something cocky or sweet. 

You wordlessly raise your brows, tilting your head slightly. Spit it out.

He does. “You look amazing.”

Not cocky. Unexpected.

You’ll take it. 

You lean forward, weight against the table as you shift and pluck the menu from between the two of you with a smile. “You say that a lot.”

“I mean it.” He hums, ankle bumping against yours under the table. You can’t tell if the contact is on purpose, if this is his way of getting a reaction out of you under the facade of  being genuine. “Every time.”

If that’s his goal, he wins, and you shoot him a stupid, flustered grin as you flush red. 

The rest of the evening gently moves along. You split a bottle of wine and pick off each other's plates, talking back and forth about work and life and everything that happens when you’re apart. 

He loves you with all of his heart and hates how much you manage to pull from him, how you get him prattling on and on with nothing more than a tilt of your head. It’s an art you’ve mastered, one that, unlike him, you never gloat about. You’ll take your win in silence. 

It’s completely dark out by the time you leave, the moon lighting the lot as the two of you quickly shuffle towards the warmth of the truck. You clamber in before he does, starting the car and turning the heat on high. He pulls himself into the driver’s seat, slamming the door behind him with a huff. 

The ride back home is similarly quiet. You sit in the hot air, head tilted back and eyes closed as his hand moves back to its place on your thigh.

He remembers the drive back to your house after the first date. Infatuated and doubly scared shitless. 

He’d walked you to the front steps of your house in silence, and before he could get any words out, you’d asked if you could kiss him. Gave him the grin he’d been flashing you all night that suddenly made him consider that maybe you’d read him to filth, that you’d beat him at his own game, that he was way in over his head. 

Your hand drapes gently over his, thumb running over the wedding ring on his finger. 

He wonders, watching the road visible  in the headlights, how the hell he got so lucky. 

— — —

hey !! it’s me !! echojays !!!!!! thank you for reading !! if you enjoyed this, consider becoming a beta reader— dm me here on tumblr if you’re interested !! you get super awesome early access to everything and i would love to beta read for you if you write in similar fandoms!  (please only reach out if you’re 18 or older!)

p.s. !! art / writing reqs are open, feel free to send in anything !! >:]

[ironstrange1991]

Unexpectedly Ours: Part 2: What It Does To Us

Pairing: Doctor!Strange, Defender!Strange, Supreme!Strange x Pregnant!Reader

Synopsis: As the first weeks go by, the reader tries to understand how she feels about being pregnant while the Stephens begin to be affected by it in a very intense way.

Word Count: 10k

Warnings: Pregnancy related themes, polyamorous relationship dynamics, SMUT: Oral sex with male receiving, finger fucking, unprotected p n v sex, squirting, creampie, pregnancy kink.

A/N: It took me 11 months to finish this chapter and I am so proud of what I did here. Has been a while since I posted a smut fic and this one is pretty filth and I won't apologize for that. Hope you guys enjoy it and have a nice reading ;)

CHAPTER ONE SERIES MASTERLIST

Being pregnant was much more exciting in the movies than in real life. The first twelve weeks were being extremely challenging for you because everything was new. The nausea continued for the first two months and began to lessen as you entered the end of the first trimester, but with the end of the morning vomiting came other sensations that you were still learning to live with.

But the pregnancy also brought something extremely positive from the point of view of your peace of mind: the Stephens had stopped fighting - at least in front of you - and the Sanctum was immersed in a collective understanding that nothing in the world could upset you, and of course, you were very grateful for that.

You were getting a lot more attention too, which, in some ways, still seemed like it wasn't enough because the pregnancy made you even more clingy to your men than you already were and even though they hadn't been going on missions together since finding out about the pregnancy to not leave you alone, they still needed to go to work and you needed to work too and you missed them a lot when you were apart, much more than you considered normal. It was almost a physical pain.

You couldn't tell which of the Stephens was happier about the pregnancy. Defender, of course, was happy from the first moment, but after the initial shock wore off, Supreme embarked on that pregnancy with you with an infectious happiness and Stephen simply couldn't contain his happiness, he was with you all the time, telling you how happy he was and how he couldn't wait to finally meet his baby. His baby. You loved how the question of paternity proved to be something natural for them. They were the same man, had the same DNA and were the fathers of your baby. Never, ever, did they question whether it was possible to know which of them had fathered the child. And you loved them even more for it. Basically, you felt like the most loved person in the world and what woman wouldn’t like to feel that way?

The pregnancy was also making noticeable changes in you, both emotionally and physically. As if it were possible, you felt like you loved them even more. You could barely keep that feeling in your chest and you were so needy all the time and the Stephens were loving it. They took turns so that you always had one of them around and they made sure to keep you close to them at all times, whether it was cuddling on the couch, in bed, or accompanying them to their readings at the library. You just needed to be physically together.

Your libido also changed with the arrival of pregnancy hormones, it increased a lot and although you were already expecting some kind of change in this sense, you didn't imagine it would be something so strong, after all you already had a very high sex drive, but what you were experiencing was unprecedented. You were literally having sex all the time.

Every morning you woke up aroused and that particular morning was no different. You had barely opened your eyes, and your hands were already groping the mattress looking for Stephen, your body already begging for him. Opening your eyes you were graced by the sight of him sleeping beautifully beside you in his pajama pants and t-shirt, his face turned towards you, his expressions calm and comforting.

It was Monday morning and you needed to start the day, but you couldn't think of doing that without first getting what your body was asking for.

With the increase in libido, your lubrication increased alarmingly and as you watched Stephen sleeping, you could feel the wetness in your panties and before you knew you were squeezing your thighs together and biting your lip. Knowing full well that waking Supreme up in the morning wasn't exactly an easy task, but fully aware that you couldn't help it when you wanted him so much, you crawled closer to him and touched his face and kissed his lips lightly and called his name a few times. However, there was no sign of a response. You tried a few more times and then sighed in frustration, but soon a mischievous smile played on your lips and your hand went down to his cock, soft and hidden inside his pants.

While moving your hand slowly up and down his length, the smile on your lips turned into a soft moan when you felt him harden under your touch and a heavy sigh escaped his lips. Impatiently you knelt on the bed and slipped your hand inside his pants. He wasn't wearing any underwear, so you grabbed his cock and pulled it out and without thinking for a second, you bent down to put him in your mouth.

Stephen sighed heavily and shifted in bed, but he remained asleep as you licked his length up and down, took his balls in your mouth and sucked them eagerly while pumping him slowly. You never ceased to be amazed at what a heavy sleeper he was. You let out a chuckle and finally took him whole in your mouth being generous in the suction, using your tongue with desire.

Stephen’s hips bucked against your mouth as he let out something between a hiss and a moan and you knew he was awake because you felt his hand on your head, his fingers tangling in your hair and his legs shaking.

"H-honey... oh fuck." His voice broke with pleasure and he gave in to his beautiful little moans. With both hands he grabbed your hair and tied it into a makeshift ponytail, but he didn't push, just kept them out of your face so he could have a nice view of what you were doing to him.

"That's right, suck my cock just like that. Oh, fuck honey, I love it when you wake me up like this."

You responded with a hum and made sure to maintain eye contact as you sucked him, flicking your tongue over the head, going all the way in and taking him out of your mouth with a pop. Repeating the process over and over again.

"Mmm, you do it so good. May I ask what I did to deserve such a special treatment?"

You smiled your best smile and pulled away just enough for you to pull off your panties and move to straddle him, lifting your nightgown and rubbing the tip of his cock against your completely soaked folds.

"I just needed you. My body has been asking for you since I woke up." You confessed and he grinned widely. He was so proud for having you feeling like that and he didn’t even tried to hide. His narcissism showing.

"Hmm, those hormones are making you so needy. That’s what you’re saying?" He teased "Put me inside you, then. Let me stretch you out the way you need it, love."

You did exactly as he asked and moaned outrageously loudly as you let yourself sink down onto his cock, feeling the delicious stretch that only Stephen's big dick could provide you.

"Just like that, honey.” He hissed “Body is asking for me, huh? This little pussy is so fucking wet for me. Tell me how much you wanted my cock. Tell me you couldn't wait for me to wake up to fuck you because you were so needy. Tell me."

You moaned, resting both hands on his chest and began to move your hips up and down, gyrating them sensually at first, but doing it faster as the pleasure increased.

"I couldn't wait, Steph. My body feels weird now, wants you all the time." You confessed and he grabbed your waist, taking control and moving you on his cock just the way he wanted. Fast and hard. The sound of the love you were making filled the silence of the room and the smell of sex were all you could sense in the air.

"It's because you're pregnant with my baby, love. Body is full of these delicious hormones right now, letting you like this, begging for cock."

You moaned loudly, feeling his words making you even more horny than you already were. Somehow the pregnancy was a turn on for you as much as it was for him, and you loved it when he talked dirty to you about it, but that only made you feel more needy and somehow what he was giving you wasn’t enough anymore. You just needed so much more.

"Stephen... take me, fuck me harder." You whined and he quickly got the message placing you underneath him in one swift movement. He came on top of you, penetrating you again and grabbing the headboard to fuck you harder. His thrusts quickly became rough, his hips grinding against your core and providing delicious friction on your clit. Your legs wrapped around his waist and your nails scratched his back as you felt your body being quickly pushed to the limit.

The pregnancy also made your orgasms easier and faster, not to mention that they were more intense too and as Stephen fucked you and whispered in your ear how happy he was, how much he loved you and how good you felt, you knew you were close. Oh, so close.

"S-shit, such a warm pussy.” He groaned “This pregnant pussy is all mine, huh? Those mommy hormones are making you so fucking needy and I'm loving every second of it. Tell me how good I'm making you feel. Tell me, mommy."

You couldn't help but be surprised by the way he referred to you, but at the same time you almost came at the word. It was undeniable that you were also enjoying every second of it and you were so close, all you needed was a little push, so you decided to play along.

"So good, Steph. Please, don’t stop. I'm so close.”

“I won’t stop” He promised while keeping the pace of his thrusts, using his hand on the headboard for support.

 Please, say it again." You begged.

As if possible, Stephen increased the force of his thrusts and buried his face in your neck indulging in his own pleasure and surrender to that new found fetish of yours.

"Such a dirty mommy letting me fuck this sweet pregnant pussy like this. Wanna cum inside this pussy, mommy, so fucking deep. Please, tell me you gonna take it. Tell me you want all of it. "

You moaned loudly, locking your legs behind his back and feeling the knot tightening in your stomach.

"Yes, Stephen, please, cum inside me. Make me cum."

Stephen let out an almost animalistic groan as he gave in to his own orgasm, cumming deep inside you and pulling you along with him. Your orgasm was intense and wet. Pregnancy had changed that too, most of your orgasms were squirting now because of the excess of  lubrication and although you were always embarrassed by the mess, they loved it, especially Supreme. For that reason, there was a proud smile on his face as he pulled out and rolled onto his side of the bed.

"Fuck, honey! This was insane.” He praised “We should keep you pregnant from now on. Fill this house with kids and have sex like this every day."

You knew he wasn’t being serious, but his voice was serious enough to make you look at him with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, right. Because morning sickness is one thing I want to keep in my life."

He chuckled, extending his arm for you to snuggle closer to him. "Okay, this part isn't much fun, but the squirting, come on, honey, you have to admit it's amazing."

You cuddled into his chest, resting your head on his shoulder and almost purring when he started scratching your scalp delicately.

"It's wet and messy." You complained to which he giggled.

"That's precisely why we like it so much."

"Hmm." You let yourself be pulled to his lips and he kissed you softly. Without giving much thought to what you were doing, you took one of his hands and began to play with his blackened fingers. Stephen no longer twitched when you did that, and you knew that was a good sign.

"So... mommy kink? That's new. I never took you for someone who liked to play on the submissive side." You teased, lifting your head enough to see the clock on the nightstand and being thankful that you still had a few minutes before you needed to get up.

Stephen smirked "I don't think we can classify it as mommy kink if I was in control the whole time." He replied proudly hurrying to correct you. "I'm not a submissive man. I leave that to Defender, but I have to admit that the idea of ​​you being a mother turns me on. And the word mommy... fuck, it really does things to me."

"It does things to me too apparently... the way you say it." You confessed a little embarrassed. "I think we should enjoy the ride while it lasts because trust me, this will be the only pregnancy we'll have."

Stephen chuckled "We never know, you might break a pot of sex pollen again." He teased and you giggled cupping his face in your hand.

"You can keep dreaming." You gave him another kiss on the lips, this time longer and then whispered. "I love you so much."

He smiled "I love you too, honey. More than anything."

You sighed and then pulled away gently standing up. "We need to start the day. I have so much work at the office today and you promised Wong that you would take care of the training at Kamar Taj today and he doesn't allow delays."

Stephen sighed "I don't know what got into me to accept subjecting myself to this. Those students are all idiots and besides it should be a crime to have to work on a Monday morning."

"Don't let Defender hear you talking like that about his students and please behave yourself there." You almost begged as you bent down to pick up your panties from the floor and then pointed to the bed where a dark stain indicated how wet you had let the gray sheets. "You take care of that since you like it so much."

He smiled broadly "No problem."

Stephen took a few minutes before getting into the shower with you and although your body gave signs that it was ready for a second round, you finished your shower quickly knowing that you didn't have the time to start anything else. He finished showering and stood next to you at the sink and both of you brushed your teeth in silence. You loved that. The intimacy of doing mundane and routine things together made you feel life was worth living.

 He quickly combed his hair and applied some deodorant and left leaving you there finishing your makeup. When you left the bathroom heading towards the closet to get dressed he was already dressed in his boots and blue robes and Cloaky opened the door and clung to his shoulders. You smiled as you watched the scene and contemplated the beauty of Supreme dressed like that. It was a sight you never got used to. Suddenly he wasn’t just your boyfriend anymore, he was the Master of the mystic arts, a powerful and feared sorcerer.

You were struggling to button the buttons of your suit skirt when he came closer and hugged you from behind, palming your belly completely unaware of the thoughts in your mind "Tummy is starting to show." He said, giving you a kiss on the cheek.

You felt your heart fluttering in your chest, but sighed in frustration anyway "I'm losing all of my clothes."

He smirked like it wasn’t a big deal "Then you need to buy new clothes. Why don't you invite your girl friends to come with you? Take my card."

You turned to face him and wrapped your arms around his neck, standing on your tiptoes to being able to look in his eyes. "Are you seriously offering your card to go shopping with my friends? What if I get a little out of control?"

He pulled you closer and kissed you sweetly. "That's why I took the job with the Avengers, honey, to give you whatever the fuck you want." He moved his fingers, and his credit card materialized between his index and middle fingers.

You smirked, taking it. "Okay, since you insist."

“I do.” He kissed you again and then sighed, "I really need to go now or I'll have to listen to Wong complain for the rest of the day."

"Poor students, they don't know what's in store for them today." You teased.

"Are you kidding? I'm the best thing they could have. I'll try to put something inside those useless heads."

You almost rolled your eyes, but instead went back to your herculean task of finding something that fit you and that you could wear to work.

...

In the afternoon you honored Stephen's wish and arranged to meet Natasha and Yelena at the mall. It wasn't often that you had a good excuse to spend money and it wasn't easy for your Avenger friends to have time for frivolous things, but everything seemed to fit perfectly and there you were trying on your thousandth piece of clothing - a hideous maternity jumpsuit that Yelena had made you try on just so she could tease you. The extravagant color and floral print were the worst part, but everything else didn't help and made you look like a birthday cake.

"Ridiculous," you complained as Yelena took a picture and quickly typed on her phone.

"Don't send that picture to anyone, Yelena!" You almost yelled. But it was too late. She lifted her phone, shaking it in her hand while laughing, and you heard your own phone and Natasha's buzzing simultaneously, indicating a message had arrived.

"I just wanted to liven things up a little on our Avengers WhatsApp group. God knows everything's been too quiet." She said.

"I never thought I'd say this, but I miss Tony's parties. It’s been quite a while." Nat confessed.

You sighed in defeat, closing the curtain of the dressing room again and getting rid of the hideous jumpsuit. You looked at the other pieces you hadn't tried on yet. Up until then, you had opted for formal clothes: pants, skirts, blouses, shirts. Clothes you could wear to work, but now there were some special pieces you wanted to try. One in particular had given you ideas for a special night and you decided to try it on right away. It was a short black dress with white polka dots and a full skirt made of tulle. It had a wonderful V-neckline that filled out your pregnancy swollen breasts very well, the fit of the skirt hid your protruding belly well and the long sleeves gave it a certain elegance, but at the same time the polka dot print made it youthful and casual. A smile played on your lips when you imagined the Stephens seeing you in that dress.

"Is everything okay in there?" You heard Nat's voice and cleared your throat opening the curtain so the girls could take a look.

"I think I like this one." You said excitedly and both of their jaws dropped.

"You look amazing!" Nat exclaimed and Yelena nodded in agreement.

"The lactation god did a great job on your boobs, and you're still in the beginning." Yelena stated making you blush and turn to look at your cleavage in the mirror. Your breasts were really big and the neckline of the dress wasn’t modest at all.

"Do you think it's too much?" You asked gesturing to the dress.

Nat shook her head. "It's perfect. I just think it might trigger a jealousy crisis." She teased.

"Wear it for a special night. Their birthday is coming up. That's reason enough to wear the dress and celebrate with all three of them at the same time." Yelena suggested, to which Nat groaned in frustration.

"She's so greedy! Most of us are struggling to get someone worthwhile and she has three!"

You smirked, looking back at yourself in the mirror. "Technically, I have one. I was just lucky enough to have two extra versions of him fall into my universe." You turned to the side to take a look at how the dress looked from the back and concluded, "But you're right, Yelena. That dress screams special occasion. Speaking of which, I have no idea what I'm going to do for their birthday. I need suggestions."

"I'm begging for a reason to throw a party." Yelena complained, but Nat immediately corrected her, "I don't think that's what Y/n has in mind. Besides, his birthday isn't until the end of November and we need a party before that if we don't want to go crazy with boredom."

"We don't need a reason to throw a party. We just need to suggest it to Tony and he'll do the rest." You said, closing the dressing room curtain again and putting the polka dot dress in the pile of clothes you had decided to buy.

Your shopping spree also yielded two more dresses, several pairs of shoes, lingerie and pajamas and a beautiful bag that you didn't have the heart to leave behind. You ended the afternoon in a beautiful coffee shop where you allowed yourself to give in to your pregnancy desires and ate a generous slice of red velvet with a pink lemonade. Overall, it was a lovely afternoon and you were so happy that it was impossible to express it in words. You no longer had any doubts that the unexpected pregnancy was being one of the best things that had ever happened to you.

...

Defender Strange was a man on a mission. Literally. He was returning to the Kamar Taj after a week away from home on a miserable mission that had not only left him bruised and tired but had also proven to be much more difficult than he had expected, and had a less than pleasant outcome with two seriously injured masters. He left them at the Metro General Hospital in the care of Christine Palmer, who by now was more than used to dealing with this type of situation, and then opened a portal to Kamar Taj where he met with Wong and gave a quick report on the outcome of the mission.

Finally, he thought to himself, he could go home. That was, in fact, his mission for the day: To finish everything as soon as possible and go home to the arms of the woman he loved and who happened to be pregnant with his child. He smiled to himself at the mere thought.

Sometimes he had to convince himself that he wasn't dreaming when he thought about it. For someone who had lost everyone he knew and ended up alone in an unknown universe, he was doing pretty well. Much more than well, in fact. Defender Strange's life was perfect, even considering that he was sharing the love of his life with two other versions of himself.

He would be lying if he said that it bothered him after all this time. Sure, he didn't like the fighting, Supreme's constant teasing, or Stephen's passive-aggressive jealousy, but overall, he was used to that life, and he was happy with it. More than he ever imagined he could be.

When he opened the portal to the main hall of the Sanctum he was greeted by the characteristic silence that indicated that no one was home. Stephen and Supreme were probably sorting something out with the Avengers and you hadn't come home yet. He sighed, feeling relief overcoming him and the tiredness finally setting in, and then he went upstairs to his room, took a long, hot shower and put on comfortable clean clothes for the first time in a week. He ended up in the kitchen looking for something to eat, but gave up when he realized he would have to cook and decided to order food from his favorite Italian restaurant. It was Wednesday, but he didn't care, he was more than convinced that he deserved it for having dealt with hostile forces that wanted to cause harm to the world once again. The bruises and cuts all over his body, the result of the battle, proved it.

He ended up sprawled on the couch with a book and a cup of tea while waiting for the food to arrive and that was how you found him when you got home. He was distracted enough in his reading to not hear the sound of the door, but your sweet voice made his heart flutter.

"Hi there!" You greeted, leaving your purse and keys on the counter in the hallway and heading towards him. And god, you looked beautiful. A week without seeing you and somehow everything seemed different. Your belly, under a navy blue suit skirt and a white linen shirt, seemed to be bigger, your breasts seemed bigger too and there was a glow to your skin that definitely had something to do with the pregnancy. There was no way it was all in his head. You looked stunning.

"Thought you'd only be back by weekend." You said, coming closer and he sat on the couch, opening his arms to welcome you in them. "Look at those cuts! I hate to see you hurt, Stephen."

He sighed, feeling the delicate touch of your hand on his face and smiled reassuringly, "I'm fine. I also thought we'd only make it by the weekend, but we were lucky. Well, at least some of us were."

You frowned, letting yourself be pulled to sit on his lap. "What happened?"

"Two masters got seriously injured. I left them at the hospital and Christine said they both needed surgery."

"That's terrible." You replied, biting your lower lip and trying to hide it, but Stephen could clearly see your discomfort at the mention of Dr. Palmer's name.

"What is it?" He pressed and you gave in.

"You and Christine together. I know it's silly, especially given the circumstances, but I can't help but feel a bit  jealous."

He knew. In a way he even found it cute. "Don't be silly.” He said pinching your cheek. You have no idea how eager I was to come home and have you like this in my arms. Christine never meant anything to me, and this one I barely know."

You nodded we a sweet pout. "I know. I hope your friends will be okay."

He smiled, caressing your back absently. "Me too. Now, tell me, how are you? I don't know, you seem different from the last time we saw each other." He instinctively moved his hand down to your belly. Deep down, Stephen knew it was too early for you to feel anything yet. You were thirteen weeks pregnant and from what he had read, the baby's first movements wouldn't start until the sixteenth week, but he was anxious. Sometimes he seemed even more anxious than you.

You cupped his hand gently on top of your belly. "I'm fine. We're fine. The nausea has pretty much stopped now, but I still feel different all the time. I know it's the hormones, but I feel so needy and on top of that I'm hungry all the time and I've been craving sweets even more than usual." You confessed, pouting adorably, which made him smile.

"I think everything is normal then, and to be honest, I don't mind if you gain a few extra pounds." He teased, knowing full well that you would feel outraged by the comment.

"But I do mind!" You immediately shot back. "My clothes don't fit anymore and I'm not coping. Well, I admit I liked the fact that Supreme let me shop with my friends his card last week."

Defender chuckled in disbelief. "He really did that? How naive of him. Tell me at least you took advantage of the opportunity."

You nodded. "Very much. I even took the opportunity to buy you guys a gift. I thought I'd use it on a special night when the four of us are together."

Stephen moaned involuntarily. It was useless to try to pretend that he didn't love your nights together. He always had the most intense orgasms watching you with the other Stephens.

He lifted your chin and kissed you gently. "And what about... are they still happening?" He asked watching your face blush in delight. You knew exactly what he was talking about, but you just nodded. He had to insist on a precise answer. He couldn't stop thinking about it during all the days he was away from home. He needed to know what chances he had of being rewarded with it that night. "Last time you said you couldn't finish without it happening. Still the same?"

"Yes. It's a nightmare. I don't know why you guys like it so much!"

He smirked kissing you again this time a bit harder and feeling his body responding to the desire and the lack he felt for you with a prominent erection that he didn't try to hide. On the contrary, he took your hand and brought it to his hip making you feel it over the pajama pants he was wearing.

"Because it's not a common thing, baby. Most women can't squirt, it's something you see in movies, but we're lucky enough to have at home every night now." He explained, squeezing your hand around his painfully hard erection and finishing, "Feel what just talking about it does to me." He said burying his face in the crook of your neck and giving you pulse point a little kiss.

You felt your skin prickling, but hold his head in your hands making him look at you and nodded to make sure you understood. You cupped his cheek and pulled him to your lips and his lips parted instinctively, letting you dominate the kiss and an almost embarrassing moan escaped his throat, making you chuckle, but you broke the kiss and, against his will, got up from his lap.

"I'm very flattered that I got you so excited without any effort, but I need a shower and food first, baby."

"That's fair enough." Stephen agreed, reluctantly letting go of your hand. "I ordered food. It should be here any minute now."

You nodded, biting your lip. "Are you coming with me?"

Oh, he wanted it. But he knew it wasn't a good idea if all you wanted was company in the shower. He needed a lot more than that. "I won't let you shower if I go up now. But trust me, baby, I'll have you all to myself tonight. I deserve this much." He said, making his intentions for the night very clear before the other Stephens arrived. Defender wasn't usually jealous, and he didn't mind sharing, in fact he quite enjoyed it, but tonight, after a week without you, he didn't feel inclined to do so. Your squirting would be all for him.

"Okay. I'll be back in a minute." You said giggling as if you could read his mind.

The food arrived ten minutes later and he set up a tray for you to eat in the living room while watching TV. There was a new serial killer show on Netflix that had just been released and he knew you would enjoy watching it with him because it was your kind of thing, so he opened a bottle of red for him and got you a can of Coke, turned the lights down low and waited impatiently for you to come downstairs to join him.

Defender valued good taste. The table set beautifully, candles and all, but sometimes it was nice to keep things more informal and you liked that. In fact, he had a feeling that it was that informality that made you like your Stephen so much. Christ, at first, he wanted to die when he heard you refer to the Stephen from your universe that way. He was more used to it now, but the jealousy was there, even if he didn't show it as much as Supreme. Actually, he was great at not showing when things were bothering him and that was more of a flaw than a talent, but luckily for him, you were great at reading him.

He was finishing organizing everything when you came down wearing a tiny baby doll made of red satin and black lace. You smiled from ear to ear when you saw that you would be having dinner in the living room - just as he had predicted.

"I forgot to mention that I bought this too." You informed him, biting your lip and turning a little so he could see the whole thing. The top was made entirely of black lace, the neckline was generous and your pregnant breasts filled it out wonderfully. The shorts made of red satin had a high waist, but were short enough that he could see half of your cheeks adorned by the black lace hem.

"So, what do you think?" You asked, approaching him and he opened his arms, wrapping you in a tight hug, but his hands were quick to go down to your ass and give it a little squeeze.

"I think you look gorgeous, but that's nothing new. You always look beautiful to me." He said, kissing you sweetly.

"Hmm, always a flatterer. I love that about you, Defender Strange." You confessed between kisses, but then insisted, "But I'm specifically referring to my little outfit. You know I bought it with you in mind, don't you?"

Oh, he knew.  "Of course I do. Black and red.” He said with a proud smirk in his lips. “It's perfect. Very sexy, but delicate. Just like you. And the fact that you bought it for me using Supreme's money makes everything even better."

You chuckled, "It wasn't intentional! I just bought it. I didn't think about it that way when I did." You defended yourself, and then pointed out, "But he said I could buy whatever I wanted so... I kind of went crazy there. I bought a gorgeous Chanel purse too."

He laughed softly, and then lifted your chin to kiss you again, this time with more intensity, more tongue. Fuck, he missed you so much. Having you in his arms like that after the week he had was like heaven, but as a reminder that your food was waiting and getting cold, your stomach growled surprisingly loud which made both of you giggle.

"Food first." He gave in.

"I guess so. After all, now I'm eating for two." You said and he instinctively put his hand to your belly. It was still tiny, but a week had made a difference. It felt like a little ball right below your belly button that he could cup with his hand. It was firm and soft at the same time and feeling it made him feel in an inexplicable way. It was as if when he put his hand on your belly the pregnancy stopped being something abstract and became concrete. Real.

"I love it. I love our baby." He said resting his forehead on yours and watching you close your eyes and practically purr for him.

"I love it too. I feel so blessed to have it. This little part of you inside of me. Sometimes I think my heart is going to burst with joy."

He kissed your forehead lingeringly. "That's exactly how I'm feeling right now." He confessed, but then pulled away gently and sat on the couch. "Come on, let's eat."

You ate slowly while watching and commenting on the events on screen. You were particularly disappointed with the story, although you insisted that you were enjoying it.

"I thought they were serial killers like Jeffrey Dahmer, but they're the victims." You blurted out and then downed the rest of your Coke. "I mean, I'm enjoying the story, but I'd rather see serial killers killing people."

Stephen couldn't help but laugh. "Do you have any idea how creepy that sentence is?"

You smiled, placing your plate and glass on the coffee table. "Don't worry, baby, I would never kill you."

That made him laugh. He finished his glass and refilled it for the third time. "I appreciate that." He said, taking another long sip of his red. Defender didn't usually drink, but on some nights he would allow himself a few glasses to relax and that was exactly what he need most that night.

"They're kinda cute, though. Are we supposed to really hate them?" You asked, moving closer and snuggling close to him. He wrapped his arms around you and let you rest your head on his shoulder, giving you a little kiss on the top of your head. You were cute. Everything about you was so ridiculously adorable that Stephen found himself wondering how it was possible for someone to be so perfect. And he knew you weren't perfect because no one is, but even your flaws were adorable, even when you pissed him off you managed to make him love you more and more.

You interrupted his train of thought when you turned your head to look at him and caught him admiring you.

"I thought you’d fell asleep. You got quiet." You said and he smiled.

"I was thinking about how much I love you, and how I adore everything you do, everything you say." He admitted watching you blush subtly "And I think we can continue watching tomorrow because now I'm going to take you to my room and I'm going to make love to you over and over until you squirt all over me."

You giggled watching him steal the remote and turn off the TV.

"Sounds really good to me." You said.

Stephen practically dragged you to his room. He was counting the minutes until he could finally touch you the way he wanted and even though he was extremely anxious, he started by closing the door, gently holding your hand and directing you to his bed. There, he touched your face and kissed you. Your lips parted slowly allowing him to deepen the kiss and a sweet hum escaped your throat as he felt his chest warm with the sound.

You had been together for a long time, long enough for him to have gotten used to the feeling of having you in his arms, but still every time it made him feel like it was the first time.

His hands went down from your face to the sides of your body and he found himself groping at you, squeezing every inch of your waist, your hips, your buttocks, literally feeling you with his hands and instinctively grinding his hips against you like a fucking teenager. But that was how you made him feel sometimes, like he was totally inexperienced. Stephen had never loved before. Not the way he loved you.

But he was lucky enough to be sure that you were as crazy about him as he was about you. You had to be, there was no other explanation for you wanting three versions of him and besides, he could see it in every gesture, every word and more than that, in the physical reactions of your body when you were together. Like now, the way your breathing was faster with every hungry kiss you exchanged, the way your hands imitated his and searched his body and pulled him closer until you were glued to each other and the sweet and beautiful moans that escaped your throat as he delighted himself in you.

Impatiently, Stephen allowed himself to undress you. He started with the top of your little baby doll. His trembling fingers pulled the hem of your top up as you raised both arms allowing him to take it off. Immediately, he cupped one of your breasts and without holding back he lowered himself to take a nipple in his mouth. You moaned loudly and your hand grabbed his hair.  He could stay like that for hours, fondling your breast and sucking on your nipple, but after a minute he resisted the temptation and returned to his task.

"It's always a very difficult task to deviate the attention from them." He confessed vocalizing his thoughts, which made you giggle and instinctively grab your breasts and start playing with them.

"They're more sensitive now." You said biting your lower lip "And bigger. I like them like that."

He smirked, holding your chin with his index finger and thumb. "And you think I didn't notice that? Baby, that was the first thing I noticed when I laid eyes on you."

That made you giggle even harder, and the sound filled his ears like music. He continued with his mission, hooking his fingers in the waistband of your shorts and pulling them down in one go, helping you get rid of them and finally be naked for him. His lips searched for yours, but they didn't stop there. He continued giving little kisses on the side of your neck and on your shoulders and continued down until he reached your belly. He basked himself there, giving little kisses and cupping the little appendage with his hand, caressing it and trying to get used to everything it made him feel.

Stephen always thought that fatherhood would be something almost sacred, and indeed it was, but somehow he felt so dirty feeling his cock throb while he had his hand on your belly. Was that something normal? Did all fathers feel that way about their pregnant women?

"Shit." He cursed, reaching for his cock and squeezing it lightly to get some relief. "Baby, you have no idea how hard I am right now. It's almost painful."

You smiled proudly at him, tangling your fingers in his hair. "You're the one who's prolonging this."

"Because I want to worship you. You're like a goddess to me. I need to worship you first."

That made you blush and in a way it was cute to think that you were still shy around him. "And I'm still learning how the pregnancy makes me feel. Is it weird to get horny because of it?" He genuinely asked.

You shook your head. "Not really.  I found out it's quite common."

"The others..." He began, but you answered him immediately.

"Yes. They feel that way too." You replied smiling. "And so do I. I had a discovering recently with Supreme..." You stopped wondering if you should continue or not and he noticed.

"Tell me about it." He encouraged. Deep down he liked to hear you talk about your moments with the other Stephens. He even stopped finding it weird with time.

He watched you blush before answering.

"It was silly, but he called me mommy and it kind of made me... well, it made me feel something."

Defender smiled holding your chin "A beautiful mommy indeed." He teased and kissed you softly. You hummed in his lips, but placed both hands on his chest gently pushing him away and taking control for yourself.

"Let me take these clothes off." You said firmly grabbing the fabric of his shirt and pulling it off, leaving him only in his pants. You bit your bottom lip, and he watched with some pride the way your eyes feasted on him. Unable to contain yourself, you brought your hand to his chest, feeling the muscles beneath his warm skin. Your fingertips played with his nipples, making them hard and sensitive, and he couldn't help but tilt his head back and let out a soft moan when you took one of them into your mouth, sucking slowly and running the tip of your tongue over it.

Defender bit his lip hard to contain another moan when you moved to the other nipple, adding your teeth to the sum and you tsked, raising your eyes to look at him. "Let me hear you. I like to hear the sweet sounds you make, baby."

He nodded, tangling his fingers in your hair, pulling you back to his lips and begging. "Take me in your mouth, baby. I can't wait any longer."

You smiled mischievously at him, "Feeling impatient, are we?"

He nodded, "Please."

"Get comfy then." You asked and he sat up with his back supported by the pile of pillows. He watched as you opened and closed the nightstand drawer and tied your hair in a ponytail. When you turned your attention back to him, his cock was already throbbing under his pants and impatiently he snapped his fingers, getting rid of what was left of his clothes. You smirked but said nothing, just positioned yourself between his legs and took him in your hands. Stephen loved your touch. He loved that your hands were small and delicate and yet had such a firm and strong grip. He watched in wonder as you let a string of saliva fall from your lips to his tip and then slowly pumped him, making him wet. His eyes closed and he hit his head against the headboard. "Oh, that's right. So good."

You spat on his cock again and then took him into your mouth gently, swirling your tongue around his head slowly as your hands slid up and down. You knew exactly what worked for him. You knew he liked it slow, gentle and with the smallest of touches you could turn him into a moaning mess. You knew him so well.

"Fuck baby, little mouth feels so good." He praised and you hummed happily. One of the first things Stephen discovered about you was that you liked to be praised, and he never failed to use that to his advantage. "Such a good mommy taking my cook so perfectly." He said testing the word with you and you literally moaned into his cock.

You took him out of your mouth to breathe for a second and then went back to work determined to undo him completely. You took him all in your mouth this time going all the way down, taking him as much as you could without gagging and increasing the speed. The wet sound of his cock in your mouth was delicious and the sight of you on all fours sucking him was enough to make any man blow too quickly, but he was holding back as hard as he could.

"Baby, it feels so good, but I have to ask you to stop, don't wanna cum yet." He warned you.

But you took his words as a challenge apparently and even taking it out of your mouth you continued stroking slowly and took one of his balls in your mouth instead, sucking it delicately and making him see stars. He moaned loudly grabbing your hair harder than he should have, but you hummed in satisfaction and he knew very well that you were the one in control and he loved it.

"You want me to cum, don't you, baby? That's how you like it."

You hummed positively and he let go of the control indulging in his pleasure and taking his cock in his hand giving it a few strokes while you took turns sucking his balls. Unable to control himself, he held his cock by the base and lightly slapped it on your face. "Take it back in your mouth, love. Suck hard and make me cum. I know that's what you want. Wanna feel my warm cum in your mouth, right? Tell me you're going to swallow all of it."

You smiled satisfied with his dirty talk. Defender wasn't really into that, but that night you had made him extremely horny, and he just couldn't contain himself. Luckily you liked that, and he could see it in the way you rubbed your thighs together. He couldn't touch you, but he knew you were soaking wet, and he couldn't wait to be between your legs.

"Oh yeah" He moaned just from the thought and the delicious suction of your lips wrapped around his length. You twisted your hand at the base where you couldn't take him and started working with your tongue the way only you knew how to do and that made him buck his hips against your mouth to go even deeper. "Fuck yeah, baby. Don't stop. Just keep going. Keep sucking my dick just like that. Feels so good. So fucking good."

You moaned into his cock again and continued what you were doing masterfully and when he realized it he was moving your head on his dick completely lost in his own pleasure while feeling his balls getting tight. "Gonna cum, baby. Wanna take it in your mouth?" He asked, but before you could even answer he was spilling himself in your mouth. He couldn't help it.

"Oh shit! Take it baby, take all of it. F-fuck yeah."

And that's exactly what you did. Taking him proudly in your mouth without wasting any of it. You sucked him until he finished giving you the last drop and then took him out of your mouth with a proud little smile.

"Delicious" You praised crawling to his arms and kissing him gently, but he was far from satisfied and in one quick move he laid you down on the bed and came on top of you spreading your legs with his hips and kissing you hard.

"You're amazing, do you know that?" He said making you giggle.

"Well, if you say so..." But he interrupted you with another kiss, bringing two fingers into your folds.

"Shit, look at this! Aren't you ashamed of being all wet like this just from having my cock in your mouth?"

You bit your lip and shook your head.

"No? I know. You're dirty, aren't you, baby?"

"Just for you." You replied and he muffled a giggle of his own on your neck making your skin prickle with the sound and the rubbing of his beard in your sensitive skin. He penetrated you with his fingers gently making you moan and nibbled on your earlobe.

"For me and Stephen and Supreme." He teased while moving his fingers in and out of you.

"Yes" You confirmed nodding your head watching him kneel between your legs and smear the tip of his already completely hard cock with your slick and direct it at your entrance.

"Then tell me how much you want me, baby. Ask me to fuck you the way you ask them to."

You moaned lifting your hips desperately searching for him. "Please, Steph, fuck me. Want you so badly. Need your cock inside me. My body is filled with this need for you. Please."

Stephen moaned loudly entering you with a single hard and deep thrust and you wrapped your legs around his hips, your nails immediately biting into the skin of his back. It didn't matter that you had three Stephens, it was as if your body never got used to the intensity of pleasure they gave you and Defender loved that. He love how desperate you always were for him.

Desperately, he sought your lips and kissed you with the same voracity with which he thrusted against you. He was yours and he loved letting you take control, but that night there was something in him that sought dominance, he needed to take you, mark you, exert his power over you in a way that would satisfy that urge for possession and that's what he did. Thrust after thrust, barely letting you breathe between the heated and hungry kisses while his hands sought your body, be it your breasts, your thighs, it didn't matter, he just needed to grope and squeeze every inch of your body.

You didn't seem to mind his sudden change in behavior, in fact he knew that you liked it, that you felt as much pleasure in being dominated as you felt in dominating. For that reason it didn't take long for him to feel your walls fluttering around him. You were close.

"Oh baby, I love it when you squeeze me like that, but it makes it hard for me to hold back. I don't want to cum yet."

You moaned, searching for his lips and kissing him softly, giving a light bite to his lower lip. "I can't help it. Cock feels so good."

He smiled, but against his will he pulled out slowly to which you protested with a whimper.

"Turn around. Get on your hands and knees for me." He asked and that was exactly what you did, hoping he would penetrate you again, but Stephen had other plans. He was dangerously close to the limit and wanted to make it last so instead of giving you his cock, he used three fingers, slowly penetrating you with them and increasing the pace as your hips moved against his hand and your moans got louder.

"Oh shit, Stephen, feels so good. Oh god, don't stop!" You begged and he smirked in satisfaction despite the familiar discomfort in the nerves of his hand. He was determined to ignore the pain caused by the incurable injury to his hands if the reward was to see you completely lose yourself in your pleasure like that while you moved against his fingers and moaned pornographically.

Defender had never liked porn exactly for the exaggerated moans, but when you moaned for him like that it was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard in the world because he knew you weren’t pretending.

"Fuck baby... gonna make me cum. I can't..." You whined but he continued his assault on your hole, finger fucking you with deliberate desperation and gave your ass a light squeeze.

"Don't hold back, baby. You know what I want. Give it to me." He teased and your legs trembled as your walls contracted around his fingers again. You liked it when he talked to you like that and so he kept coaxing you to reach your climax.

"Come on baby, let go for me. You're going to wet the bed for me, aren't you? You know I want it, I've been thinking about it all this time. Be a good mommy and squirt for me."

And so you did it. You moaned even louder this time and your legs shook with the intensity of your orgasm as hot liquid squirted from your pussy wetting the bed and coating his hand beautifully.

"There you go. So beautiful, baby." He praised removing his fingers from inside you and taking them to his mouth, sucking on them until he tasted all of that wonderful nectar. "And you still ask why we like it so much."

You just moaned softly, letting your legs give way and lying face down on the mattress. But he still wasn't satisfied with you and without warning he entered you again going deep and staying there, feeling you contract around him, squeezing him and enveloping him in your wonderful warmth.

"I never get tired of being inside you, baby. You're so warm and so wet. Feels so good, oh shit." He moaned while fucking you with slow and sensual thrusts now.

You moaned against the mattress, "Steph... please. It's too much."

"No baby don't say you're tired already. I still need you." He begged grabbing the headboard with one hand and continued thrusting slowly but maintaining the same intensity, seeking his release with an almost primitive determination. He could feel his balls tightening, the familiar heat rising up his hips and accumulating in the pit of his stomach. He was close. All he needed was a little push.

"Talk to me. Make me cum." He found himself begging as he buried his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling the delicious scent of your hair as he fought for air, breathing heavily.

You moaned softly, face pressed against the mattress. "F-fuck baby, you fuck me so good. Tell me you're gonna cum inside me. Gonna make me yours."

Defender closed his eyes and focused on your voice as his thrusts became more erratic. He was so close now.

"I know you missed me, baby. All these days working and knowing the other Stephens were fucking me at home, but now you're here. Mark me as yours, fill me with your cum and leave me dripping, smelling like you so they know."

Defender came. An almost guttural groan escaped his lips as he forced himself against you and filled you with his seed. He had so much to give you that he was sure if you weren't already pregnant, he would have knocked you up. And the idea was delicious.

"S-shit... take it baby. Oh, so fucking good. My baby feels so fucking good." He rasped.

You were surprised by Defender's dominant behavior, but you couldn't deny that you had loved every second of it. Apparently, the pregnancy was doing things with all of you. It took him a minute to pull out and roll over on the bed and when he did you immediately snuggled into his arms. His cheeks were slightly pink probably from realizing everything he had said and done that night.

"Are you okay?" He asked stroking your arm slowly up and down. "I was a little rough, wasn't I?"

You nodded "I'm fine. I like it."

The corner of his lips curved into a smile. "You did this to me. The pregnancy made me..."

"I know." You said cupping his cheek. Your faces so close that you could feel his warm breath on your cheeks. "That's what it does to us. It must be the hormones, I don't know, but I'm enjoying it as much as you guys are."

He cocked his head up to kiss you and you felt yourself melting in his arms. His gentle and caring way showing again.

"Let's just enjoy the ride. We still have six months of this." You said finally.

He hummed contentedly, "Let's hope they pass really slowly. I'm definitely not in a rush."

“Neither do I.”

Reblog please! Leave a comment if you liked it. Interact! I will love to read all of your comments and opinions. It inspires me to keep writing!

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[thetempleofthemasaigoddess]

Friends with benefits to lovers with Sabo

Sabo x reader, past Sabo x Koala.

*****

🎩 You and Sabo have been best friends since childhood, given the fact you both joined the Revolutionary Army as children. Your parents, a couple of high-level operatives, had been killed on a mission, and Dragon decided to take care of you from then on; this is how you meet Sabo, who had just been rescued after running away from home.

🎩 Given the fact you are the only two minors in the whole base at Baltigo island your friendship is almost a foregone conclusion, but it’s actually the losses both of you have sustained, the solitude and longing for what you have lost, that allow you to bond. Sabo no longer remembers he has two brothers, but he feels something important is missing in his life, an emptiness your friendship allows him to fill; you, on your part, devote to him all the love and affection you once held for your parents. You become each other’s safe place, confidant and supporter; even when surrounded by people you soon grow to care for and trust, you immediately look for Sabo when you enter a room, dry his tears with your fingers when he feels sad, and patch his wounds after training; and he does the same for you. You run away from the base to join him on his first mission, violating Dragon’s direct orders; Sabo beats the crap out of any man who touches you without your consent. 

🎩 You have promised to be friends forever, no matter what, and you can’t imagine a reason why that situation could one day change, not even after Sabo remembers his past. You hold him in your arms as he cries for Ace, feeling guilty he didn’t get to say good-bye, and when you accompany him to Dressrosa your friend introduces you to Luffy; you are happy for him, and never fear he could love you less, or even just neglect you, because there is someone else he cares for… 

🎩 … which is why you have absolutely no objection to your friend finding a girlfriend. Koala is a great person: kind, clever, brave and generous, not to mention very pretty, and the two of you become friendly when you find yourselves sharing a room in the base’s dormitories. In fact, when Sabo admits that he had developed feelings for her, you immediately take it upon yourself to arrange a date between the two of them: you take advantage of a rare moment in which none of the three of you have duties to attend to, steal two beers from the kitchen, and invite both Sabo and Koala on the roof, to enjoy the quiet and the starry sky as you share a drink. Both happily accept; you meet them on the roof, give them the beers and simply say “Enjoy your date.” before walking away, leaving a flabbergasted Koala and a blushing Sabo. 

🎩 They are a couple from that day on, and while you are happy for your friend, and to leave him some alone time with his girlfriend rather than being the sort of friend who always insists to tag along, you can’t help wishing you also had someone by your side. Many operatives of the RA find it difficult to pursue a long-term relationship, given that there is little time for romanticism in your way of life, no chance of going on dates or enjoying some privacy in four- or even eight-bed rooms, and the all-present danger and enormous pressure most of you are subjected to. It isn’t unusual for operatives to resort to other types of arrangements: friendships with benefits, occasional hook-ups, no strings attached affairs - anything, to find even just an hour of peace in the arms of someone who cares for you at least a little, and feel you are not completely alone and have reason to fight another day. It isn’t ideal but most of you make do, including you, who have had your first sexual experiences with some of your comrades but, no matter how satisfying and enjoyable those have been, you can’t help wishing for more.

🎩 Sabo always says that you are a great person, and that anyone would be crazy not to want you; he even offers to return the favour and act as your wingman if you ever need one, which you appreciate, but the truth is that there is no one you are particularly interested in, neither in Baltigo nor among the other agents you occasionally meet. You could find someone to sleep with; there are at least a couple people who would be glad to accept your invitation. The matter is, you want more - not simply a lover, but a partner, someone who cares for you beyond the warmth of your body, someone who you know would look for you as soon as he steps in a crowded room, think about you while you are distant, and with whom to hope for a future together, some day there will be no need for the RA anymore.

🎩 (Sabo does and would do all of it, of course. You know he cares for you enormously, worries when you are sent on a mission, and is always ready to welcome you with a big hug when you return; you have also promised to remain friends forever, whatever the future may bring. You can’t deny he is an extremely attractive young man either, slim but strong, with expressive eyes and a nice smile. Yes, you find yourself reflecting more than once, sometimes even as you lie in bed with someone else, Sabo does have everything you look for in a partner, and since you get along so well as friends, you would probably work nicely as a couple; who knows what could happen, had you met in different circumstances…)

🎩 Sabo and Koala have been a couple for roughly eight months, and clearly happy with each other, when Dragon asks her to transfer to another base of the Army, far away from Baltigo, to carry out a year-long mission. She and Sabo -who then tells you everything; beyond the most intimate details, there is little you and your friend don’t share about your relationships- talk about it, and agree that she has to go, since their duty towards the Army, and all the people she will contribute to defend and protect, has to come first… and also that they have to separate. “We knew a long-distance relationship couldn’t work, and since we had decided to be exclusive since the beginning, opening our relationship so that we could find solace in other people while we were distant felt wrong too.” your friend sadly explains that night as you have dinner “So we decided to break up, and one day, when Koala returns from her mission, we’ll talk and, if we both want it, we’ll get back together.”

🎩 You tell him that you’re very sorry for him, and he nods in appreciation, admitting that he has had better moments, but knowing that it was the right decision to make, and that they have parted amicably, is of some comfort. He will miss Koala a lot, but he’s proud of her for having been chosen for this important mission, and knows she’ll do great things; the next year will pass quickly, you try to comfort him, and the more they miss each other, the happier they will be once she returns. Sabo smiles, and later, as you leave the mess hall, he hugs you with his arm around your shoulders, before planting a kiss on your cheek. “Thank God you’re still here, (name).” he says “I really wouldn’t know what to do without you.”

🎩 Koala leaves two days later; you, like her other friends, hug her tight and wish her good luck, while she and Sabo, who have said their goodbyes privately, simply share a smile. 

🎩 You keep an eye on Sabo from then on, to make sure he is fine, eats and sleeps when he should, and that the loss of his girlfriend hasn’t distressed him more than he can handle. Thank God your friend seems to come to terms with his returned singledom relatively quickly; he takes care of himself, keeps busy with training and work, and he assures you that while he still misses Koala very much, and doesn’t feel ready to begin a new relationship, he feels alright and doesn’t regret breaking up with Koala. You make sure to be there for your friend, not wanting him to think you’re pitying him or to suffocate him with your affection -”Come on, (name), I just broke up with a girlfriend; it hurts, but it’s not the end of the world.”- but letting him know, without the need for words as usual between the two of you, that you are there for him, ready to help and support in any way he could need.

🎩 You never stop to reflect on the implications of your promise until one night, soon after the end of a mission, you return to Baltigo to find a particularly despondent Sabo; today is Koala’s birthday, and he misses her more than ever. Determined to take his mind off his ex, you steal more than two beers from the kitchen and invite your friend to drink them together, not on the roof under the stars -it would be indelicate, not to mention counterproductive, since it was there and doing that that he and Koala became a couple- but on the small balcony of your room. You start discussing your recent mission, but as the empty beer cans pile up at your feet, your conversation shifts towards more private matters… specifically, your sex life, or lack thereof.

🎩 “So they were very attractive, right? And they filled me with attention and compliments, which was flattering, and they made it clear that they liked me, so I thought, I haven’t had sex in more than a year and I just survived an attack unscathed, I deserve some fun.” you recount miserably, having already told him of the RA operative, a person you had never met before, you were introduced to at the beginning of your latest mission “And then we did it, and… and it was horrible! They did nothing wrong, I think they actually tried to make me feel good, but… but I felt nothing, nothing at all. I’m so disappointed… Five minutes into it, and I couldn’t wait for it to end. What’s wrong with me, Sabo? I’ve been with people I knew and liked much less, and it was still more pleasurable than this.” Your friend assures you that there’s nothing wrong with you at all, sometimes people are simply incompatible, and while he can sympathise with your plight, he’s probably in an even worse situation… “I’m horny.” Sabo confesses, intoxication evident in the telltale flush on his face “I know she’s been away for less than a month, but Koala and I had sex almost every day, and now… I’m literally bursting. I tried doing it by myself, but it’s not enough, and I have no other choice, since even though we agreed we would be free to see other people there’s no one I am even remotely interested in. I swear, if I don’t have sex soon, and a lot of it, I’m gonna lose my mind.”

🎩 You both reflect on your misfortune for a while, sitting in companionable silence; you have drunk much more than you are used to and you know it, but nonetheless, the idea that suddenly blossoms in your mind feels like the best you’ve ever had, a brilliant solution to both your and your friend’s problem. “You could have it with me.” you suggest. “... what? Have what?” “Sex, of course. Think about it! There is no one we are closer to than each other; this has to count for something, right? I’m sure it’d be great between us, even though we don’t love each other like that. We could simply have fun, keep each other company, and when Koala returns we simply stop and go back to being friends. What’s wrong?” you ask, seeing the hesitation on Sabo’s face “Is the prospect of having sex with me so unbearable? Don’t you think I’m attractive?”

🎩 “Of course I do! (name), I think you are as beautiful on the outside as you are inside, which is saying something. But you know how complicated things can get between people who date or have sex, especially when there isn’t a stable relationship behind it; the last thing I want is there to be tension or misunderstanding between us. I can live without sex, but losing you, or knowing I made you cry? No, that I couldn’t bear it; isn’t it better if things remain like they have always been?” he points out. You understand his point of view, but, you consider, you do share a stable relationship, the longest and most affectionate of your lives, and neither of you would ever do anything to hurt the other; as long as you establish some rules, you can’t imagine a single reason why you you could come to regret this arrangement; if anything, your friendship will come out strengthened, because it will be another experience that you have shared. 

🎩 “You seem so optimistic…” Sabo considers “Is actually you talking, or the beer?”, but you can see in his eyes your proposal has intrigued him, and part of him is tempted to accept. “Let me think about it for a while, alright? And you should too, once you’re sober.” You promise, and you spend a few minutes more enjoying each other’s company before returning in, swaying a bit and holding on to each other to remain upright. When he says goodbye on the door of your room, Sabo’s kiss on your cheek feels warmer than usual.

🎩 Over the next few days, as you reflect on the conversation you and your friend shared -it takes you almost forty-eight hours to sober up, and the headache and the nausea are the worst of your life- you don’t regret offering yourself to him. You still think it’s a good idea, the perfect solution to both Sabo’s sexual frustration and yours, and in any case Koala is going to come back in less than a year, right? You’re ready to bet both she and Sabo will immediately decide to get back together, so you and your friend will simply have fun and share your pleasure until he can once again focus on his girlfriend and you hopefully find someone you really care for. Non-exclusive relationships do entail the risk of the two partners discovering they want different things, but you and Sabo have been friends for so long that it’s impossible for your feelings to change; once he’s back with Koala, you’ll stop sleeping together and your relationship will turn platonic once more, like it was before.  

🎩 There is no risk whatsoever; you are absolutely sure of it.

🎩 A few days pass, during which Sabo makes no mention of your proposal, even though you spend plenty of time together as usual. He has promised to give you his answer soon, so you’re not worried, and in any case, you know he’s thinking about it. It is the way you sometimes notice he’s looking at you, at your body, from across the room, as if he were wondering what you look like under your clothes; the fact he almost chokes, even though he is neither eating nor drinking, one day in the mess hall as he hears you moaning in pleasure for the delicious chocolate cake you have just tasted; the sensation of his hands lingering on your hips for a moment too long when he helps you descend from a step-ladder you had climbed onto to repair a hole in the wall. He is thinking about it, your proposal intrigues and perhaps even tempts him, and no matter how completely platonic your relationship has always been you can’t deny it, you are excited… and you have started looking at your friend differently as well, thinking things you never considered before. 

🎩 And then, terrible news reached Baltigo. Two of your top operatives have been captured by the Marines, and if they are led to confess the RA’s secrets under torture, it will be the end for you all. Dragon tasks Sabo with retrieving them; you beg to be allowed to accompany him, aware of the danger he’s walking into, but your leader refuses. Sabo hugs you tight. “I’ll be back before you know it.” he says, and a moment later he has slipped from your fingers.

🎩 Danger is a natural state of being for RA operatives, and Sabo is probably stronger than anyone else in the organization after Dragon himself, not to mention that if either of you  worried every time the other left for a mission, there wouldn’t be space for anything else in your life. You know he’ll risk his life, yes, but he’ll be happy and even proud to do it, to help your comrades, and because he, like you, is ready to give his life for what he believes in; you try to stay positive, which is easier said than done, hoping that he’ll be able to get away with it, like he has done a million times already. Days pass without any news of your comrades - any of them, including your blond-haired, fire-wielding best friend, until one night, at the end of a long training session, you are lying in bed -coincidentally, the only one occupied among the four in the room, since Koala’s space is yet to be occupied and the other two women are away on a short-term mission- waiting for sleep to claim you when you hear a soft, quick knock on the door.

🎩 “Yes?” “It’s Sabo. Open the door.” 

🎩 You obey, your heartbeat quickening, and you and your friend share a long, silent look, both knowing what the other is thinking and feeling. “Are you alright?” you ask, since given the state he’s in, Sabo must have come to you without stopping in his own room to clean himself or rest. He nods, quietly whispering that the two people he was sent to retrieve are back, exhausted but safe, just like he is, beyond a superficial wound on his arm that he already bandaged; he has already reported to Dragon, who then sent him to bed. 

🎩 You should urge him to obey, since your friend can barely stand and looks like he hasn’t slept in three days, but you don’t, rather you stand back to allow Sabo to enter, and then close the door behind him; he’s been in your room plenty of times, but this is different, tonight is different, and you both feel it without the need for words. “I’m happy you’re back; I missed you very much.” you murmur, feeling shy like you’ve never been with him, and your friend smiles, taking your face in his hand; your gazes meet once more. “Is the offer still valid?” Sabo murmurs -or at least you think he does; the pounding of your heart is almost deafening- and you can feel he’s trembling. “Of course.” you whisper, taking his hands in yours to intertwine your fingers, and then his forehead is resting against yours, only for a moment, before both of you move to allow your mouths to meet.

🎩 Your first kiss is an explosion of fireworks in your chest. It’s messy and awkward and uncoordinated, like two relatively expert dancers who pair up for the first time and struggle to keep up with each other, and there’s too much saliva and Sabo must have recently eaten something very spicy, which you’ve always found unpleasant, but it’s him, it’s you, the two of you together, and this is why it feels like magic, a bit unreal and new but in no way wrong. Quite the opposite really…

🎩 By the time you break the kiss, Sabo is holding you by the hips, the touch gentle but firm, and you’ve wrapped your arms around his neck, your fingers playing with his hair; your gazes meet once more, and you can see he’s blushing. “It was… amazing…” you murmur, and you see a smile of relief blossom on your friend’s mouth. “It was; I couldn’t stop thinking about you, about kissing you, it was driving me crazy… and I know we should stop and talk before we do anything else, but I can’t…” Your finger pressed on his lips silences him. “It’s alright.” you murmur “There will be time to talk; now I just want to feel you.”  

🎩 You share a long kiss while you walk to your bed, and another as you start removing your clothes, still a bit clumsy but more and more enthusiastic as you realise how pleasant what you are doing is, and how the other person seems to appreciate it. You’ve seen Sabo shirtless a thousand times, since that is how he usually trains and you’ve often been required to patch his wounds, but tonight the sight of his naked torso is enough to take your breath away. Soon you’re sitting on the bed together, and “May I?” Sabo asks softly, reaching towards you, and you nod, and he takes care of your underclothes and you of his, and a moment later you’re kissing again, you lying on the bed and him bent over you, as you touch each other. Sabo’s mouth descends from your mouth to your throat and your chest, sweet and shy and worshipful; he murmurs that you’re beautiful and soft and that he wants you like he’s never wanted anyone before, and you know, simply know, that he’s sincere.

🎩 Sex between you is intense, slow but passionate, desire and pleasure made almost uncontrollable by the affection you share. You blush when Sabo holds your breasts in his hands and murmurs they are bigger than he imagined, and you hear him make the most delicious moans when you take him in your mouth, filling your senses with his taste and his smell. You’ve always thought he’s handsome, but you’ve never seen him so breath-takingly beautiful as he is now that he holds you in his arms, murmuring sweet words in your ear as his warm hand caresses your skin. “I want you; Sabo, I need you, I need you so much.” you confess, and you see awe in his eyes when he touches the most intimate part of you and feels how wet you are for him. 

🎩 He’s gentle and careful not to cause you pain as he finally penetrates you, but the realisation that the sounds you’re making express pleasure rather than pain makes him more bold, and soon you’re moving together, his hips pressing against yours, your nails scratching his back, and the world outside the room disappears as you hold on to Sabo and pray this night never ends. You end up having sex two times; Sabo apologises for being too tired to do it a third time and you assure him that you don’t mind, that it was amazing and perfect, and that in any case you have a year to do it as many times as you want, so what’s the hurry?

🎩 Sabo laughs softly, his fingers playing with your hair. “Thank you.” he murmurs, his eyes so full of affection and gratitude it’s almost overwhelming “I am glad we got to share this; it has never been like this before, and I’d have never experienced it if you hadn’t offered.” You assure him that he’s more than welcome, and that you can’t wait to see what this new side of your friendship will lead you to. “Do you want to stay? Please?” you ask; Sabo’s happy smile is the only answer that you need, and what happens next is something neither of you has ever experienced before, with any of their previous partners: you fall asleep together, holding each other, lulled by the sound of your heartbeats.

🎩 The next morning Sabo has to wake up earlier than usual to make sure no one sees him leave your room; now that you’re both well-rested, not remaining together for the previously promised third round is the hardest thing you ever had to do. You share a kiss, quick but loving, and promise to meet later; Sabo leaves after making sure the coast is clear while you remain in bed for a little more, enjoying the warmth of his body still lingering around you. You’ve never felt so happy in your life, and you can’t wait for the two of you to have some time alone again; Koala has been gone for six weeks, which means you and Sabo have roughly ten months and a half to spend together, and you’re determined to make the best use of the time at your disposal.

🎩 That night, after you have both taken part in a meeting with Dragon and other high-level operatives, planning a series of operations for the next six months, you and Sabo take a brief walk outside to talk in peace. You both agree what happened last night was amazing, probably the best sex of your lives, and since you want to do it again -and again, and again, and again- you decide to set a few rules. Number one: either of you can say no, stop, not now, or let’s end it here whenever you want. Number two: protecting your friendship is what matters the most; if you ever feel that what you are doing could make it impossible for your relationship to return to what it was before, you’ll stop. Number three: your relationship will end once Koala and Sabo get back together, or in case you meet someone special before that happens. Number four: no one else has to know what you are doing, since neither of you wants to be the subject of gossip among your comrades. 

🎩 And so it begins. You had heard someone say once that a close friendship is the best foundation on which to build a romantic relationship, and you can confidently say it is the same for a purely sexual one, because being with Sabo is unlike anything you have experienced before. He is, objectively speaking, a very good lover: relentless, generous, inventive, respectful, enough to make you forget any person you have ever been. 

🎩 With so little free time available during the day and the presence of your roommates making it almost impossible to have a space to yourselves during the night, you and Sabo have to get inventive in order to keep your relationship secret, which adds to the fun and excitement of being together. Your favourite meeting places are the pantry, a tiny room where you don’t even have the space to lie on the floor but with the added bonus of a door that can be locked from the inside, and the training room, whose isolated position relative to the dormitories relieves you from having to suffocate your screams in your hand, or against Sabo’s shoulders, to stop the whole base, or the whole of Baltigo island really, from knowing what you are up to.

🎩 You remember Sabo telling you that he and Koala had sex almost every day, and you privately have to admit it’s not only for his sake that you’re determined to at least measure up to that standard, which is not an imposition, since for days, weeks even, you are literally unable to keep your hands off each other. Kisses are stolen, gifted and exchanged in a corridor every time you can spare a minute before the start of your duties for the day; hands linger, only for a moment more, on bare skin at the end of a training session; reunions at the end of a mission become the occasion for a brief, intense rapport consummated on one of your beds, both of you aware that any of your roommates could enter any moment and unable to care. 

🎩 Despite having to share the relatively small spaces of the RA base with so many other people, no one seems to perceive something has changed in your relationship, mainly because your comrades are used to seeing you and Sabo together, and know how close you have always been. People occasionally ask Sabo about Koala, expressing sympathy for the end of their relationship, and an older operative offers to introduce you to an acquaintance of theirs who will stop by the island for a few days; both of you simply smile, thank your friends for their concern, and tell them that you’re fine as you are, while your hands touch under the table or your gazes, knowing and amused, meet across the room. 

🎩 Until last month, until a moment before this crazy, genial idea blossomed in your half-intoxicated mind, you had thought having sex with your best friend since childhood would have felt somehow wrong, impure even, since until then you had considered Sabo the brother you never had; you couldn’t have been more wrong. You had sincerely liked and cared for some of your previous partners, but as you expected he is different, enormously so, and you both know the deep trust and affection between you and Sabo does make sex even more pleasurable, while your new shared intimacy allows you to deepen and expand your previously platonic friendship.

🎩 Like you, Sabo is open to trying more or less everything at least once, so you compensate for the little time you have to spend together making sure every rapport is unforgettable, fun and passionate. You enjoy being pressed on the bed by the warm weight of Sabo’s body, as his lips descend to kiss every inch of your skin; and you feel equal pleasure in being pulled to his lap, your legs circling his hips, as your friend makes you bounce on his cock, his strong -very much so; you knew Sabo was more vigorous than his slim built suggests, what you couldn’t imagine was how titillated would be to have him manhandle you- hands holding you by the hips as he sucks on your breasts. You feel a shiver of pride when Sabo is forced to wear a scarf to cover the hickey you have sucked on his neck, and he can’t help smiling when he’s able to coax a fourth orgasm out of you, a personal record for both, in the course of a single amplexus. Having come into possession of a visual Den Den Mushi, you take a few photographs of your naked body, which you then develop and hide in Sabo’s jacket pocket, on the day he’s meant to depart for a week-long mission; he appreciates the thought very much, makes good use of them, and then shows you, beyond any doubt, that no matter how good the pictures are, nothing compares to the real feeling of your warm skin against his. On your birthday, Sabo gifts you a very skimpy set of lingerie, which you have no idea how he obtained even though it fits you perfectly, with a few strategically-situated slits and holes that allow you to have sex while you’re still dressed.

🎩 You have sex on Dragon’s desk. Twice.

🎩 He calls, and tells, you things you never imagined you would hear. Darling, doll, my beauty, my pretty girl, you dirty girl; these are only some of the terms of endearment Sabo never tires to use while you’re together, some tender, other sexy, and some both things together. He’s never been particularly loquacious, even with the people he cares and trusts, which is why you are pleasantly surprised to discover that while having sex Sabo simply can’t stop talking. “God, you look so beautiful. What pretty sounds you make! Does it feel good, (name)? Does it feel good when I put my cock inside you? Yes, like this, I want to make you moan loud enough for the whole base to hear… Mmh, you’re so wet for me, I know you like it when I do this…” 

🎩 You and Sabo still consider each other your best friend. You spend as much time together as you did before, train together, sit together in the mess hall, talk and joke as usual, without any awkwardness or tension. You know the affection you have held for each other since you were children hasn’t changed, and that while you’ll miss having what is without a doubt the best sex of your life -and how disappointed you are, knowing you only have a few months left to enjoy it!- you know your and Sabo’s friendship will easily return to what it was before, a purely platonic and perfectly satisfying feeling, once he and Koala get back together. 

🎩 At least this is what you keep telling yourself. 

🎩 Once, as you catch your breath together after Sabo fucked you senselessly against the wall of the training room, you ask him what is better, sex with you or with Koala; Sabo looks at you, startled, and at first he doesn’t seem to know how to answer. “Do you really want to know?” he asks you back in the end, and you, already regretting your curiosity and fearing the answer won’t be to your liking, hurry to shake your head in response. You avoid returning on the subject, but later, as you reflect on it at the end of a training session, you decide that yes, you really want to know whether Sabo prefers having sex with you or with his -currently former, soon to be once again- girlfriend. It’s a matter of personal pride, since while you don’t dislike Koala, quite the opposite, what woman would enjoy knowing she is less desirable than another? It shouldn’t matter so much, not when your arrangement is nothing more than that, a pact you and your friend have made to find relief from sexual frustration, but it does, it matters, even though it takes you a while to understand exactly why. 

🎩 Sabo never talks about Koala when you’re together, not even while you’re simply eating sitting face to face, fighting in the training room, or enjoying the cool of the evening on the roof with a single beer to share; out of tactfulness, no doubt, because he doesn’t want you to think he’s still thinking about her, maybe even looking forward to her return. There would be nothing wrong with it, you tell yourself firmly, since you know well how much he loves her, and in any case, feeling jealous of one’s friend with benefits would be absolutely ridiculous. You should stop brooding over it, you decide before finally drifting to sleep, and enjoy your time with Sabo while it lasts. 

🎩 Your good intentions last no more than a few days. You and Sabo have met in the training room once again, and are making love with you sitting on his lap, his lips burning as they kiss every inch of your body they can reach. It’s perfect -it rarely isn’t, when it’s you and him- Sabo is being as sweet and attentive as usual as he murmurs how beautiful you are and how good you’re making him feel, kisses you deeply and, as he always does, makes sure you have come at least twice before finding his relief between your thighs. Pleasantly sore, you hold him against you as you pet his hair and Sabo happily nuzzles against the side of your neck. “You are gorgeous, doll.” he murmurs, and you freeze.

🎩 Doll. This is one of his favourite pet names, which you usually like, even though right now it troubles you. Did he ever call you by your name, tonight?, you start asking yourself, and how often has he done it since you started sleeping together? Does he use those terms of endearment out of affection, or is there another, more hidden, reason? Maybe… that he wants to make sure he doesn’t say the wrong name? Also, you did notice that often he keeps his eyes closed as he comes, or hides his face in the crook of your neck, as if he wanted to avoid looking at you… as if he wanted to maintain the illusion it’s another woman he’s having sex with.

🎩 You are getting anxious over nothing, the more rational part of you knows it well, and your doubts have a perfectly rational explanation, but you can’t think rationally, and suddenly you’re tense, afraid even, in a moment when you normally should feel at your most relaxed, satisfied and happy in the arms of a man who has given you more than anyone else ever could. Broaching the subject now is probably the stupidest thing you could ever do, because it’s sure to upset Sabo and cause a fight between the two of you, but you can’t help it, because you’re afraid, afraid that everything you’ve done together, all the intimacy and pleasure you have shared, never existed, because the woman Sabo wished he had in his arms isn’t you…

🎩 You haven’t uttered a word, brooding over the matter as you played with Sabo’s hair and kissed his cheeks, as usual in moments like this, but he knows you better than you know yourself -even though, it will turn out, not as well as he thinks he knows you- which is why he easily perceives something is troubling you. “What’s wrong?” “Nothing!” “(name), I can feel you are tense. What’s wrong? Wasn’t it good?” You assure him it was more than good, as usual, but you were just wondering, and it’s perfectly alright either way, but… “When we make love…” it’s the first time you call it that “... is it me you think about? Or Koala?”

🎩 As you feared, you see hurt fill Sabo’s eyes; hurt, and disbelief, as he lets his hands fall from your hips. “What? How can you ask me that? Why do you keep thinking about her while we are together?” he asks, and you apologise, because you really shouldn’t have, just like, you privately add, you shouldn’t let the matter upset and sadden you, but it’s already too late for that “After all that is why we’re doing it, right? Because you missed Koala, and needed to… unburden. It’s fine, it’s not like we are… a couple or anything, there’s nothing wrong, I shouldn’t let this affect me… I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m doing this…”

🎩 Sabo looks at you, half hurt, half worried, and completely incredulous. “Do you really think I could do that? Think about her - think about someone else when I’m with you? (name), what sort of man do you think I am? Haven’t I shown you how much you mean to me?” “Of course you did! But I know how much you care for Koala, and it would be perfectly understandable if you…” “Is this what all of this means to you? Just empty sex? I can’t believe it!” Sabo exclaims; you end up arguing for a while, both angry and secretly guilty, and in the end you part to spend the rest of the day apart. 

🎩 You sleep badly that night, and spend hours staring at the ceiling of your room, calling yourself stupid and childish and cruel; the fact that Sabo wasn’t thinking about another woman while he was with you should make you happy, and it does, but at the same time you’re still worried, and afraid, because no one feels jealous of a friend with benefits, nor has the right to demand loyalty like they would from a partner. You didn’t mean to accuse Sabo of disloyalty, but you have to admit that the thought of Koala, a woman you sincerely like and consider a friend, has become a source of frustration, even of regret, even though you and Sabo would have never mad-had sex if it hadn’t been for the two of them dating.

🎩 You have no reason, and no right, to feel upset, or least of all jealous, that Sabo’s feelings for his ex-girlfriend didn’t suddenly disappear the moment he started sleeping with you; even someone with as little experience in romance as you knows that is not how it works. You know that Sabo still considers you his dearest friend, that he feels pleasure when you’re together, and that he’s not merely using you to forget another woman; but then, you can’t stop asking yourself, why does it hurt so much? Why can some part of you not stop wishing his feelings for Koala changed, and he decided he’d rather remain her friend rather than getting back together once she’s back?

🎩 Because that is what worries - no, what scares you the most; that one day, in a few months, Koala will return, she and Sabo will resume their relationship, and you’ll be relegated to the side once again - a thought that feels unbearable, even though Sabo never neglected you after he and his girlfriend started dating. The three of you had naturally found a balance, friendship and romance each having its own space without jealousy or recrimination, and there’s no reason to think you could not go back to it once Koala will have returned. It’s just… that you don’t want to. Sabo’s friendship is the most important thing in your life, something you’d defend with your life if needed, but knowing that he’ll be doing with someone else what you are now sharing… this breaks your heart. And for all of this, for this mess that has led you to fight with Sabo for the first time since you were twelve, you have only yourself to blame.

🎩 The next morning you look for Sabo in the mess hall, but you’re told that he came earlier than usual, ate quickly and left, without waiting for you as you usually do. If he thinks he can avoid you Sabo clearly doesn’t know you as well as you thought he did, and a few hours later, having made sure he’s not busy with something important, you corner him and insist you have to talk, which your friend agrees with a sigh. You both apologise for what you said yesterday; Sabo assures you that while you did start having sex because neither of you could find a more desirable partner -”Neither of us, remember? you were as frustrated as I was.”- he could never think about someone else, not even his ex-girlfriend, while he’s with you, because what you share is too precious and special, and he feels pleasure because you are the one giving it to him. 

🎩 While reassured, you still think the situation is different, because you didn’t have a partner Sabo might be jealous of, but while your friend suggests you conclude your arrangement, because as you had agreed when deciding on your rules not even the best sex in the world is worth the two of you fighting and he’d gladly remain celibate for the next decade rather than cause you pain, you hurry to reassure him you are fine, it was stupid of you to worry and you’d happily go on like you have done until now. You manage to reassure Sabo, who kisses you deeply and proposes to meet tonight, and you enthusiastically accept, joy and relief filling your heart.

🎩 You haven’t told Sabo what led you to suspect he was thinking about Koala while he was with you, but you do notice that from then on, he does start looking you deeply in the eyes as he comes, and using your name as well as the various pet-names. Maybe he always did and fear and anxiety simply forbade you from thinking clearly, maybe your friend is actively trying to reassure you; whatever the reason you are happier and more grateful than ever that you get to live this, with him, and that night in the training room, you hold on to Sabo’s warm and solid body for dear life, determined to enjoy every second of your time together as if it were the last of your life. 

🎩 Weeks pass, and things are going great between you and Sabo. A while ago a few new operatives have joined your base, among which a very attractive man named Tomo you quickly become friendly with; even Sabo approves of him, even though, he says, “I’m pretty sure he’s into you.” You disagree, pointing out that Tomo has never expressed any interest in you, but you are forced to admit you were wrong when, only a few days later, while the two of you are leaving the mess hall together, Tomo cups your face in his hands and kisses you deeply. It’s a very nice first kiss, the right balance between gentle and passionate, and it leaves you pleasantly dizzy, but you are too shocked to enjoy it properly, not to mention you feel vaguely guilty. Tomo apologises for having caught you off guard, admits he’s more than a little interested in you, and proposes that you spend some time together. “You don’t have anyone at the moment, do you?” he asks, and you find yourself hesitating for a moment before shaking your head in response, and ask for a bit of time to think about it.

🎩 You do what you have always done in times of doubt: you talk to Sabo asking for his opinion and advice. Your friend doesn’t seem particularly happy to discover he was right about Tomo’s interest in you. “What do you want to do?” he asks, and you, while vaguely nervous about the risk of causing another quarrel, answer truthfully, telling him that you do like Tomo, and would be happy to spend some time in his company, but given the fact you have been sleeping together for months now, you thought it necessary to ask for his opinion, in order not to create tension between you. “I mean.” you stammer, praying that the blush you feel creeping up your cheeks is hidden by the soft lights in the room “I know we are not… a couple or anything, and that we agreed I would be free to see someone else if I found a person I cared for, but I thought… we never talked about being exclusive, so…”

🎩 The few seconds Sabo takes to answer are the longest in your life; you warn yourself not to get your hopes up, because while you did the right thing sharing Tomo’s offer with him, Sabo knows he has no right to be jealous of you, and would most likely not be so in the first place; why should he? You are not dating, and while even a purely sexual relationship can be exclusive, he had to expect you’d get interested in someone else sooner or later. 

🎩 Part of you still wishes he were; that he was jealous of you, at least a little bit. It’s childish, and unfair, and even cruel, to wish someone you love to suffer because of you, but you can’t help it, because no matter how happy and flattered you are that someone else has expressed an interest in you, and well aware of the relative non-binding nature of your and Sabo’s relationship, you do wish the thought of you and another person together caused him some distress, because that would mean that he cares…

🎩 “I have nothing against it. Thank you for telling me, (name), but it’s perfectly fine if you spend time with Tomo. Do you want me to step aside while you see him? It’s fine by me either way.” Sabo says, which is more or less the reaction you had to expect, and the exact opposite of what you wished for; disappointed, and even a tiny bit heartbroken, you force yourself to smile and thank your friend for his advice.  

🎩 You are not particularly enthusiastic about the prospect of meeting your new suitor, but Tomo, to his credit, does manage to make you smile again. You meet that night outside, and he has prepared a small picnic for the two of you: a blanket, a bottle of saké and some snacks he has prepared personally, all of it to create a pleasant, romantic atmosphere for the two of you. No one has ever done anything like this for you, and it really warms your heart; you spend some time eating, and drinking, and talking about yourself, the past that has led you to join the RA, and your dreams and aspirations for the future. Tomo is funny, clever and kind as well as handsome; this time you’re the one to take the initiative and kiss him, and a couple minutes later the remains of your picnic have been pushed aside to make space on the blanket for your clasped bodies.

🎩 It feels nice; very nice, in fact, and you’re happy, and excited, when you and Tomo start undressing each other, and he’s sweet and attentive and passionate, and soon you’re having sex, him holding you close as he moves above and inside you, his kisses swallowing your moans of pleasure. The whole experience is more than pleasurable, both the sex itself and the time before that, that the two of you spent getting to know each other better. You do like Tomo, and would gladly see him again - in fact, you’d be ready to ask him yourself, if not for a small but crucial detail…

🎩 … that you did what you only recently accused Sabo of doing: you had sex with a person, thinking about someone else. 

🎩 The conversation you are forced to have with Tomo is the hardest of your life, and it fills you with shame, because the poor guy had perceived you have enjoyed his company, and felt confident you would accept to see him again; even worse, you’re not even able to tell him the reason for your refusal, vaguely stammering something about not feeling ready and having a past lover who you can’t forget. You part amicably, all things considered, but Tomo is clearly deeply saddened by your refusal, which fills you with guilt. 

🎩 Your first instinct as you return inside is to look for Sabo, but once you reach the door of his room you stop, suddenly aware of your own foolishness. Given the hour your friend is most likely sleeping, and no matter how close the two of you are it’s unlikely he would appreciate being woken up to listen to your plights, especially since you would never dare to tell him the real reason why you decided not to see Tomo again. No, it’s better if you go to bed, sleep on it, and then simply tell Sabo you decided you and your suitor are not compatible…

🎩 “(name)? What are you doing here at this time? Is everything alright?” Sabo asks, seeing you in front of his room on his way back from the bathroom; then he sees your face, and immediately gets alarmed. “What happened? Is it Tomo? Did he do something to you? I swear I’ll kill him!” he says, holding your shoulders in his hands, and you shake your head; his anger warms your heart, but at the same time you barely have the strength to meet his eyes, irrationally afraid that he might perceive what you did, and that it was his face, his smile and the way he has to say your name, that you thought about as you had sex with another man. He would not get mad, nor would he accuse you of hypocrisy, even though he’d have reason to; Sabo is above such vileness, but you can’t tell him, because you dare not think about how he would react…

🎩 “I’m fine, don’t worry, and Tomo has no fault. We… we did have sex, and he was fantastic, he was so sweet, but… but I don’t think I’ll see him again; in fact, I told him already I plan not to.” Sabo sighs - with what you perceive as exasperation, which is something relief can be easily mistaken for. “I see.” “It makes no sense, I know; but I couldn’t do otherwise, and now I feel so stupid…” You sigh. “I’m sorry, I know you want to go back to bed, but… could you hug me? Just for a moment?”

🎩 He obliges, naturally, and as usual, the warmth and safety of Sabo’s embrace is enough to drown all your pain and shame; you cling to his arms as his fingers run gently through your hair, and wish you could spend the rest of your life like this. 

🎩 Two days later, you and Sabo are eating in the mess hall. “I was thinking, and you’re free to say no…” your friend begins, his tone low to keep your conversation private, his eyes trained on his plate “Our… thing. I know we decided we would stop when she returns or you meet someone else, but would you be alright with being exclusive while it lasts?” “Yes, alright.” “It’s fine if you want to think about… What?” “I said it’s fine, Sabo.” you confirm with a smile, joy bubbling in your heart “To be honest, I wanted to ask you the same. Will you pass the water, please?”

🎩 You have always had the bad habit of making things more difficult than they are; but sometimes, things are easy, and one only needs the courage to see it. 

🎩 Time passes; beyond the occasional quarrel or misunderstanding your relationship is going great, both on the side of friendship, which is more solid than ever, and the one that concerns the benefits. Sex with Sabo really is the best of your life, to the point that you know you’ll miss it terribly. Part of you even fantasizes about asking Koala’s permission to keep sleeping with Sabo while the two of them date; she would no doubt find it unacceptable, and he would as well, no matter how pleasant your arrangement has been. 

🎩 Still, you dearly wish you didn’t have to give up on it; less than two months remain until Koala is due to return from her mission, and you find yourself counting the days with the anxiety of a student who is not ready to take a quickly approaching exam. You are confident that your friendship with Sabo will return to what it was before, and you feel grateful and blessed for it, but if you think about him and Koala together once again, enjoying the sort of affection he now shares with you… it’s unbearable. You have no right to complain, since all of this was your idea and Sabo did warn you either of you might end up suffering for it, and you don’t mean to. You don’t regret any of it, not a single moment of what you and your friend have shared in these months, and that is exactly why you wish it didn’t have to end.

🎩 It’s not just the great sex you dread having to give up; it would be much easier if that were the case. The truth is, sharing your body with Sabo has opened your relationship to an intimacy and level of emotion you had never experienced before. It’s something precious, special, delicate but addictive, that you doubt you could experience again with another person… while Sabo certainly will, and maybe he already has, with Koala, and it’s this -the thought of losing him and suffering for it, potentially for the rest of your life, while he quickly finds a more than worthy replacement- that makes it so hard to accept the fact that your arrangement with Sabo is soon coming to an end. 

🎩 This time Sabo doesn’t seem to realise you are worried and upset, which is a relief since you have already given him enough troubles to last for a lifetime, and you did agree to keep the truth about your new relationship secret, but you do need to confide in someone and ask for advice; fortunately, the wisest, kindest person you have ever met has recently come to Baltigo from her own island for a meeting with Dragon and the other RA commanders, and is happy to find a moment to talk to you. 

🎩 You and Ivankov have long been close; in fact, it was him who took care of you in the immediate aftermath of your parents’ death, making sure you were fed, comforted, and kept safe. You trust him more than anyone else besides Sabo, and he’s the only person you could ask for advice. You meet in the mess hall late at night, once most of your comrades have gone to bed, and Iva listens to your story intently; you tell him everything, even the most personal and embarrassing details, and admit that the problem doesn’t really exist, since you can’t stop Koala from returning home at the end of her mission nor would you ever ask Sabo not to pursue a relationship with her once again. “It’s just that I feel terrible, Iva, and I don’t know why.” you admit miserably, almost slumped over the table “I don’t want to lose what Sabo and I have now, but I have no other choice, do I? I’ll always be happy with being his friend, but I’m afraid I will regret losing him for the rest of my life. I really don’t know what is happening to me…” 

🎩 Iva sighs, looking at you with eyes full of compassion. “I think what you’re feeling is very clear, (name)-girl.” he says gently “I think you’ve fallen in love with Sabo-boy.” “WHAT?!” you exclaim, stunned, and Iva points out that would explain everything: your relationship with Sabo was already incredibly close to begin with, and the pleasure and intimacy you have shared in the last months have changed your feelings from pure, platonic friendship to something different. “That’s why the thought of seeing him and Koala-girl together hurts so much; because you’d want to be in her place, and know Sabo loves you back; and loving someone whose affection is directed towards someone else is a pain I would not wish on my worst enemy, no matter how close you and Sabo could go back to be as friends.”

🎩 Love. Is this what you feel? Part of you can’t believe it; you’ve thought Sabo is handsome for half your life without doubting your feelings were different from pure friendship, and you’re not naive and romantic to the point of thinking good, even exceptional sex, can make a person fall in love with another. You’re not in love with Sabo, for God’s sake! It’s just that something beautiful and special has developed between the two of you and you don’t want to lose it, no matter how equally precious your friendship was to begin with! And yes, you can’t deny you occasionally fantasise about being in Koala’s stead, and about a relationship that hadn’t been born with an expiration date, and hearing him propose you become exclusive made you happy, because it meant that he did care about you, beyond friendship, beyond pleasure and convenience, that he wanted to be with you because of you…

🎩 Crap. You are in love with him!

🎩 “There, there, it’s alright.” Iva gently soothes you, patting your back “Just breathe, (name)-girl. It’s not the end of the world, even if it looks like it.” It really does. “It’s over, Iva; what do I do?” you miserably ask your friend “He doesn’t love me, and he never will.” “You don’t know it.” “Of course I do; he loves Koala, and he’s been waiting for her for almost a year. I know he cares for me, we are best friends, and we’ve had some great sex for months, but what we share is just relief because she was away and I couldn’t find anyone. The moment Koala returns, Sabo will want her and no one else.” Iva, who has already met Sabo after his arrival in Baltigo, looks at you skeptically, and then suggests you discuss the matter with Sabo himself. 

🎩 “Why should I? It would serve only to create awkwardness between us, and I know Sabo enough to know he’ll probably try to distance himself from me in order to spare me pain, and so I’ll lose his friendship as well.” you point out “I don’t want that, nor do I want to spend the rest of my life hoping he and Koala break up so that I can… step forward. I need to keep this thing for myself, and be happy for what we had, and the friendship we still share; please, Iva, promise me you won’t tell him anything.” Your friend promises, clearly unconvinced of the justness of your decision, and asks you to call him, or write, whenever you feel the need to talk. You promise, and the two of you share a hug.

🎩 You remember the exact date of Koala’s departure, and soon its first anniversary is exactly four days away. “I bet you are counting the hours.” you comment one night as you and Sabo lie together in your bed, courtesy of the absence of your two roommates, both of whom have volunteered for a mission and won’t be back before tomorrow. You are curled up against his side, your hand playing with the soft hair of his chest, his legs intertwined with yours. Sabo, who despite his more than considerable stamina is completely out of breath -something you can’t help being proud of!- blinks, as if he had no idea what you’re talking about. “Sorry?” “About Koala’s return! It’s soon, isn’t it? Have you been told the exact day? We should organise a little celebration for her.”

🎩 And you really want to, because you do like Koala, and you don’t want to ruin what has until now been a good friendship; seeing her and Sabo together will break your heart, but at least you know he’s happy with his girlfriend. You’re determined to be positive, and be content with what you have. “Sabo? I said…” “Yeah, I heard you; it’s a good idea, but I don’t know when she’ll return exactly.” “Shouldn’t you ask Dragon?” “I will.” He doesn’t seem particularly enthusiastic, you think, rather his expression betrays tension, even guilt, to the point he can barely meet your eyes. But why? Does he fear his girlfriend will disapprove of the two of you sleeping together while she was away? It makes no sense, since the two of them had broken up and agreed they would be free to see other people. What then? Well, a year is a long time to spend apart when a couple has been together for less than that; maybe Sabo fears he and Koala won’t be able to simply pick up where they left off. What - oh God, what if Koala has met someone else? What if they decide not to…?

🎩 Stop. Don’t get your hopes up, (name); the higher you try to fly, the harder your fall will be, you tell yourself; it’s something your mother used to say. “Is everything alright? You know that whatever worries you, whatever you fear, you can tell me.” you murmur, taking Sabo’s face in your hands to force him to meet your eyes, and he nods, his eyes full of emotion. He doesn’t speak, but he takes advantage of the proximity to kiss you, hard, and you spend the rest of the night making love as if this were the last of your lives; you hold Sabo in your arms, not demanding to know what worries him, but making sure he understands that whatever he’s going through, he doesn’t have to face it alone.

🎩 You do love him. The feeling has been growing slowly inside you, and maybe you would have never realised it if not with Iva’s help, but now you know it’s true, and whatever happens you don’t regret having fallen for him, or having pursued a sexual relationship with him and then having to stop. You know Sabo will forever want to be your friend, and this is enough. You just want to be with him; nothing else matters. 

🎩 The next day you meet Dragon outside the mess hall, and ask him if he knows when Koala will be back, explaining that you’d like to organise a celebration for her return, and your leader looks at you strangely. “Koala has decided to remain at her current base indefinitely; she has been doing a great job, and the commander has asked her to stay.” he explains “I told Sabo almost a month ago, I thought he would have informed you.”

🎩 He hasn’t. 

🎩 You make sure not to meet Sabo for the rest of the day, including your now daily sessions in the training room late at night; you don't want him to worry, but the truth is you really need a little time to reflect on the recent revelation. Koala will not be returning to Baltigo, and Sabo knew already; he has avoided telling you for a whole month, and while you think you can understand why, you’re not sure whether what you’re thinking is rational reasoning or simple wishful thinking, and this scares you. You might ask for Iva’s advice, or simply remain silent and wait for Sabo to decide what to do; or you could act, speak up and tackle the matter directly. You could be sincere, like you and your friend have always promised to be with each other, and tell him exactly what you feel and think. 

🎩 Which is why in the afternoon you go to him and tell him that you have arranged for someone else to cover his duty for the rest of the day; Sabo blinks, nonplussed. “Why would you do something like that?” “Because we need to talk, Sabo, and I think you know about what; come on, we need to leave before Dragon sees us and finds something else for us to do.” Your friend follows you, his expression an odd mix of resignation and relief; you find a quiet corner to talk outside. “You know, right?” “If you’re talking about Koala deciding not to return, I do. Sabo… why didn’t you tell me? For a whole month?” you ask, and your friend sighs, taking your hands in his. “Do you really not know?” he asks quietly, and you, suddenly unsure, admit that you have your suspicions, but it feels presumptuous to even just hope they are true. 

🎩 “I thought… that it had to do with me; with us. That since we had agreed we’d continue to sleep together until Koala returned, the fact that she plans not to do so could mean that we can go on doing it indefinitely, should we both want it.” you explain, suddenly fearing you did get your hopes up for nothing; after all the fact that Sabo preferred not to lose his friend with benefits doesn’t necessarily mean he shares your feelings “You could have told me; you know I enjoy our time together, it… it wouldn’t have been an imposition.”

🎩 Sabo admits he was wrong to keep the truth from you… and that the possibility of you deciding to stop sleeping with him was only half the reason why he did it. “It’s just… well, I have cared for Koala very much, I missed her a lot and I’m still incredibly fond of her; but I have come to the conclusion that what I felt for her wasn’t love. I got to speak to her over the Den Den Mushi a month ago, and we agreed it was better for us to break up. She’s fine, I actually think she has met someone else; I don’t regret dating her, at all, but remaining together would have only made both miserable.” You nod, understanding his reasoning, determined to express what you feel but not knowing how. “I think you both did the right thing, and I would have never come between you, but I have to confess… recently I have found myself feeling jealous of Koala; of her… role in your life. You know how important our friendship is for me, and how great sex is between us, but… but I can’t help wanting something different; not something more, I would be more than happy either way, and I know you might never see me as anything other than a friend, but…” 

🎩 You stammer, not knowing how to conclude, but Sabo wordlessly opens his arms towards you, and a moment later you are embracing; he kisses your forehead. “You know I said I had realised what I felt for Koala wasn’t love? It was thanks to you that I understood that.” he murmurs “And I still want to be your friend, and to sleep with you; but knowing that we belong to each other would really be the best thing ever.”

🎩 No other words are necessary; you and Sabo hug each other tight, he kisses your tears, murmuring words in your ears you never dared to think you would one day get to hear, and you tell him how happy you are, happy to have him in your life, and to know that once again, you have chosen each other.

[vanit20]

Ok so fic idea - magic reveal and reality shenanigans, takes place after the season 3 final.

So Merlin and Arthur are on a quest to get a magic dohickey, idk what, but, it's like magic, and then boom there's an attack. In this attack Merlin's magic gets revealed and Arthur is MAD obvi he won't attack Merlin but he is mad and says some hurtful stuff. They get trapped in a cave system or something during the attack and can't really get out. Merlin is understanding at first but Arthur keeps on harping and isn't listening to Merlin so Merlin starts to shout back. While they walk the fight starts to get more heated, by the time they find themselves in a large ornate opening in the cave system, they are screaming at each other. They stop for a bit to realize that they have found the dohickey. They storm up at the same time and grab the thing. Since their both mad at each other they start fighting with both of their hands on the thing. As they do so Arthur shouts that he wishes Merlin had never come to Camalot and Merlin says he wishes the same thing and says that mabey if he didn't come his life would be easier. What they didn't notice, while they were fighting, was the slowly growing glow of the dohickey under their hands. Once those words are spoken there is a bright light and both Arthur and Merlin black out.

Arthur wakes up in his room. He's still mad but doesn't even consider the thought that Merlin had done something. He thinks that something magical must have happened and Merlin had gotten them home. Once he thinks of magic he feels his blood boil and he gets up ready to stomp out of the room to find his useless servant but once he gets up he hears a soft knock at the door. He feels confused for a bit but tells the servant to come in. It's George, just as prim and proper as ever, but he looks.... Scared, Gorge had always looked differential and subservient, like a good servant but never scared, it might not have been noticeable but Arthur had seen the man relaxed and enjoying his job this was not that, he was stiff and his hands had a small trembl. He notices things despite what Merlin might say thank you very much. Gorge walks into the room head bowed, with silent and effective movements he opens up all the curtains, barely looking up once or saying a word. Which is also strange because Gorge usually greets or had a brass joke or two to tell. Arthur watches him intently wondering what was happening. With his anger temporarily forgotten he asks the silent Gorge where Merlin was. Gorge flinches when Arthur says his name and bows lower and apologizes saying he knows no Merlin. Arthur is gobsmacked. What does he mean he doesn't know who Merlin is. He gets up quickly and storms towards the door which was the same direction that Gorge was in. Arthur doesn't miss the the shake of George's sholders. Arthur hesitates for a moment before continuing out. He needs to find Merlin once he does then all of this can be sorted.

He heads to Gaius' chambers, he bursts in to see the old man sitting and reading. He looks supprised to see Arthur. The room felt empty. Arthur noticed it immediately. Merlin was a physician in training and had always left his books everywhere and had all his experiments all over the place. But the chambers were neat. It was how it was before Merlin had stepped foot into Camalot. Arthur felt his stomach drop. Gaius asks him what's wrong Arthur doesn't even look at him he heads straight to Merlin's room and yanks the door open, it's a storage room. He then remembers what the last thing they had said to each other in that cave, and he feels sick.

___

Merlin wakes up in a strange place. It's a delapedated room. But it looks lived in. He sees that there are magic books strewn about and clothes all over the place. It looks a lot like his room but that can't be right. He then remembers what happened in the cave and shoots up. Arthur! What happen to Arthur. He's about to run out the door when there is a knock. He freezes. Mabey these people have Arthur. He carefully says come in. A servant walks in head bowed. They look up and gasp. They fall to the floor and start groveling saying sorry that they looked apon the great Emrys face. Merlin is stunned, what was happening? He tries to calm down the servant but they just continue to grovel. Merlin is at a loss. He then sees a mask and grabs it and puts it on. He manages to calm the servant down after that. He asks where he is. The servant looks confused and tells him it's the isle of the blessed. Merlin starts because why would he be there. He tells the servant that a spell must have gone wrong and he needs a refresher of what he is doing there. The servant looks at him strangely but obliges. They tell him that he was rescued from the mortals clutches by the high priestess Nimueh and was raised as the champion of the old religion. Him and his two sisters Morgouse and the recently joined Morgana are rallying against Camalot any it's army. Merlin's head is spinning at this point and he has no idea what is happening. He has no idea how he had ended up like this. He then asks what the servant had initially come for and they say that Nimueh had requested for his presence. He takes in a deep breath and follows them. As they walk Merlin tires to figure out what is happening. He retraces what had happened before now and then the realizes that the dohickey must have done this. He represses the urge to groan as he remembers the things him and Arthur had shouted at each other before he had woken up here.

Looking around he notices that the castle is old, it seems like much of it could not be repaired. The walls are crumbling with cracks littering their surface. Merlin notics that while it is clean it is not spotless like Camalot, this means that there isn't enough servants to clean everything. They soon arrive in front of a door the leads to, what Merlin assumes is, the throne room. The servant knocks and steps aside. Merlin is nervous, he has no idea what his dynamic is with Nimnueh here. He knows that he could kill her but he needs to figure out how to get home. He remembers what Arthur does when greeting Uther and assumes thats the safest bet. He gose in and gives the crown prince's greeting to Nimueh which seems to be the right thing. As he looks into her face he feels a shiver go down his spine. He hadn't noticed it before because he was distracted, but someone was connected to his power. He couldn't access all of it. And he had a pretty good idea of who has been taking it. As he looks into the face of Nimueh he thinks 'Shit'.

That's all I've got

Things I would add:

- Arthur tries to talk to Gwen and he realizes how much of their relationship had hinged on Merlin - could be romantic or friendship depending on the ship of lack thereof the in the fic.

-Leon is a lot more distant from Arthur mabey not even his first knight, that would be one of Uther's nights.

-Agravain causing Arthur to fuck up.

-Arthur is wayyyyyy more anti magic, he is like his father burning those with just an accusation of magic so everyone is terrified of him.

-Uther is dead, the undead knight from season one had won that fight.

-Arthur has many more scars, his knights are in shambles, there are magical creatures roaming around and Arthur realises how much Merlin had actually done.

-He realizes how truly lonely it is to rule the way his father has and he comes to terms with the fact he would have turned out exactly the same if it weren't for Merlin.

-Merlin is also starting to realize how lonely it is to be in a powerful place

-Everyone cowers from him and although him and Morgana are on the same side she is fearful of him because of his destiny.

-He dose not have the name Merlin here and is only called Emrys.

-  He is put into Arthur's shoes and had to deal with an overbearing parent, and having to care for a kingdom of sorts. While he knew the pressure Arthur was under and tried to help him as much as he could. He didn't realize how paralyzing it was to be the center of that pressure.

- Both the boys learn how much they rely on each other and how much time they truly spend together.

- While their friends are there they feel lonely as their bestie ain't there.

- I feel like Leon and Lance are with Arthur, mabey Arthur took away the noble thing because they didn't have enough nights caus they kept on dying. I feel like this would mean Gwen and Lance are married? Mabey.

-Gwaine and mabey even Percy and Elyan might be mercs hired by the magic side.

- So Arthur asks Gauis about Merlin, Hunith's son and Gaius is stunned as he doesn't know how Arthur would know them as they died soon after Merlin was born. Arthur thinks in this world Merlin isn't alive and freaks tf out. He thinks he wished his best friend out of existence.

-Merlin finds out that the magical community is currently going to war against Camalot and non magical people.

- Merlin thinks that this Arthur is not his Arthur, he will try to find a way home.

- A cool way for them to meet up is that mabey they are both forced to go somewhere, they both take the people they recognize or are close too. This is considered weird but is let go.

They bump into each other and fight for a bit then Merlin's mask falls off and Arthur freezes. Merlin sees this and also freezes. They stare at each other for a moment. The knights around them stop fighting because the two of the have stopped. - Merlin asks tentatively 'Arthur?' and Arthur's eyes start to tear up. He thought he had wished away his best friend but here he is. He stands there, stunned for a moment and Merlin calls him again. He snaps out of whatever fuck he was doing and calls out 'Merlin?' Merlin's postures relaxes and he let out a breathy laugh and rubs his hands on his face. Arthur then realizes that this is _his_ Merlin. He stabs his sword into the ground and hugs him. - meanwhile the nights are there in the background being like wtf???

- In the end they find the dohickey and it turns out they weren't in a parallel universe but rather they had changed their own reality to make it so that their wish was plausible.

- They set things right and have a nice long chat.

-Yay the end

That's a lot of words magic man. I won't write this probably. This is just a dump of my ideas. So take it my children and fly, and if anyone writes something with this premise please put it in the comments or tag me 😭😭😭 My ao3 is I_need_sleep12345