#but good gods i'm proud of it... makes it much more menacing to be known as The Scourge as a title

[fstbmp-a]

i'm still proud of crystal the scourge, frankly. making it a title really elevates the name, imo.

[hornkerling]

As you wish, @jadesabre301

My fics for stray gods mostly come in sapphic, particularly Calliope/Persephone because they're so angry and messy and delightful and writing Calliope soothes my inner menace. The first I ever wrote was Kore Enterprises, filling in the missing scene of Persephone visiting Calliope's apartment.

I expore Calliope and Persephone first getting together in Firewater, which probably still has one of the better opening paragraphs I've managed recently.

Calliope is used to Persephone on the edges of things. A cautionary tale for late night drinks and the bluer days of late autumn, when the city parks are full of crows fighting over the night’s scraps amongst raw and jagged trees, their final leaves are just the shed skins of their livelier, younger selves. A fragile song through tiny bones.

I wrote You caught my voice and listened as a response to @kshaar's Earworm, which is such a good drabble istg. Everything they write is incredible, whether for stray gods or dragon age, you should read all of it. But Earworm was the one that had me seeing if I could remember enough Greek to mangle some Sappho. It's also, like most of my fics for these characters, full of extravagant eidolon lore.

I have one Calliope x Grace, Calliope x Persephone, eventual ot3 everyone lives AU called Sing all your questions to sleep, which was quite fun. Comes complete with a rant about The Symposium!

The two fics I'm probably the most proud of, however, are The seed that grows without the sun (complete) and Monsters of the old world (one chapter to go).

Monsters of the old world came about because Hephaestus's fate in the game haunts me. He is one of my favourite Greek gods, and because I'm me I was tangled up on the crip potential of it all, and also the idea of Medusa on a very particular rescue mission. I'm trying to close off the final chapter, but it keeps running away from me because I get caught up in the absolute mess that is Aphrodite's choices re: Venus. But it's nearly done!

Hephaestus is blowing glass the first time he hears about the snake-haired bitch in the compound. It is only training and muscle memory that stops him from swallowing and ruining this body’s throat, and frankly the body is built more for war machines drawn up in CAD than the construction of delicate, physical parts. But Hephaestus has always worked better with a prototype, and while you can take a smith, lock him in a server room with a wall of screens, and he’ll make do, he’s always preferred to bother his captors with these specific, ‘old fashioned’ demands. A workshop. Bronze and coal where they want radium. Glass blowing, when a single wrong move would fuck his lungs beyond repair. Even he’s got to live, and showing the bastards just how much their discards can do is some extra stolen joy. When Hephaestus has to pass on, the higher ups throw the infirmary at him. Why waste an able fighter on the crippled god? Hephaestus’s eidolon tends to lead to injury, and well—that path is a dark one. But he is sure the tales of Medusa’s arrival are something he’s dreamed up in a crucible, and it’s not till he’s in the compound’s refractory and a hooded, writhing figure is shoved into a chair opposite him that he believes it can be true. Medusa stares at him, eyes hectic and flaring in a single, surprised moment before she ducks her head, the snakes around her face extending flickering tongues into the air between them. Chains hold her arms at her sides, and a corporal slams a bowl down, glaring at Hephaestus as the known quantity. “You feed her,” he snaps. “Not like the snakes will get you.” For a moment, Hephaestus and Medusa, two who have not spoken in millennia and rarely even then, meet each other’s eyes in perfect accord, amazed that this child-human thinks snakes are the problem

Seed is...it's about Persephone meeting the woman she would become in the late 1940s. It's one of the most personal stories I have ever written, despite being in a time and place I have not lived.

If you read any of them, read this one.

“—I can help with that.” Chastity wipes sweat from her eyes and blinks at the woman leaning against her gate. She’s seen her around. Hard not to, when there’s only one good place for bread in the village—though if there’s any more rationing or prices go up again, she’ll have to start making that, too, and God only knows where she’ll find the flour.  But that’s future, and presently Chastity has a stocky, slouching stranger smiling at her, and she’s got a spade. And the spade's not covered in rust like the one Chastity found in Sal’s shed. Hers has an edge to it, and Chastity, a married woman for nearly a year and imagining it cutting through the dirt she’s barely managed to scatter, is pretty sure this is what lust feels like. Turns out, Sister Immaculata was wrong.

[shirogane-oushirou]

AAAAAAAAAAA RO!!! BESTIE!!!! YOUR TAGS ARE DESTROYING ME RN /POS

I just had to send you an ask in response because oouughghghhhh... my feels... 🥺💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

I actually never realized how much I look like Java until I put our faces next to each other on that moodboard!!! The resemblance between us is so uncanny - but maybe that's why they've been giving me such good gender vibes lately ☺️ Amber resembles me quite a bit as well according to another friend, which is awesome to hear as an aspiring non-human shapeshifting critter!! Seriously, I'm so thrilled that you guys see it, too!! My gender euphoria levels shot THROUGH THE ROOF when you told me that...!!!

YOUR COMPLIMENTS ON MY PHOTO TOO... *SNIFF*... 😭🫂💖 I really love how my glasses look on me!! Last time I went to the optometrist, I tried to pick frames that I felt suited me, and that happened to take me into the men's section!! My mom was a bit confused by it, but those frames spoke to me right away 🥰 I didn't care that they were supposed to be frames for prescription sunglasses!! Besides, my lenses tint in the sunlight anyway so 😎✨️✨️✨️

I saw the tags you left on my art comm too, and I SO AGREE WITH YOU. I TOTALLY GET IT. I have a ton of Rockstar gifs and screenshots saved to a folder, and I adore the shit outta them all, but... ever since I discovered my guy's gender identity, if he doesn't have scruffy facial hair or a fuzzy chest patch, or those soft, hairy limbs... or his precious top surgery scars that he's so proud of?? He feels kinda like a different Cookie to me LOL

Basically, if he ain't hairy, transmasc or genderfluid, then he ain't my husband 😌💖✨️✨️ I think my version of him really suits the voice he has in C.R.K too!! A rough, rugged old man with passion and energy to spare, but who's finally starting to settle down a bit, too... he's not quitting the rock scene, not by a long shot - but he is a bit more inclined to blow things off and disappear if Java needs him (or if he misses them enough ☺️💖). He's an absolute menace in such a playful way, and I'm so attached to him, honestly... my handsome rock beauty 🥰💖💖💖💖

AAAAAAAAAAANYWAYS. This has been my involuntary Rockstar Supremacy ted talk!! Thank you for attending since you had no choice 🤣 /lh

And as always, I appreciate your tags and comments on my stuff!! I get so happy and flappy when I see that you rbed my stuff cuz I get to read all your awesome thoughts, hehe 🤗✨️

♡• @rockstars-babe •♡

NO IT'S SO REAL THO!!!! i pogged when i saw your face next to java's akjsndfkjnsf like?????? oh they're LITERALLY just reffie ok ok ok LMAO. and i can definitely see you in amber too!!!! idk i just feel like your s/is fit you so clearly despite having such drastically different designs, it's Wild!!!

god, i really need to take that approach when i start looking into getting new frames sometime soon ;;; that's such a nice way of thinking about it. like. if you're going to put that much investment into something you're expecting to wear for a number of years straight, may as well get some that are cool as shit KJNDFKJN and have the most comfortable vibes, gender be damned.

it's so odd, bc i've mostly known rockstar through you, and 90% of the time it's been CRK rockstar... but as soon as you really 'discovered' him, it's like a switch flipped ksjndf. it just fits him so well!! and i'd especially trust that view from someone who knows as much about him as you clearly do, from all of your talk about the new game >:)

and the voice thing!!!!! that's so odd too!!!!! when i was doing that "give me a series and i'll find an f/o" ask game, i listened to a couple of his voice lines for curiosity's sake. and his voice was like... it felt like it could grow on me, but his visual image and his voice were just a little... out of sync? if that makes sense? they weren't quite lining up w each other. but as SOON as you posed the topless comm of him i was like :0 OH. THIS IS WHO THAT VOICE BELONGS TO. JKNASFKJN.

i love reading your gushes about him; you have SUCH passion for him and for everyone who makes up your cookie family with and around him. 😭 it's why i like to really consider what i say in the tags; i want to match that energy! and it's why i look forward to when YOU rb stuff!!! you put just as much passion into appreciating everyone else's ships!! you just have so much passion in general and it's something i admire about you 🥺🥺🥺

(though i would 100% be behind if you decided to not pressure yourself so much KJNSDKFJN ;; you're dealing with so much outside of selfshipping, and you should feel able to come on here and Just Chill without feeling like you have to put 200% effort into replies and tags ;w; )

[dudadragneel]

AAAAND HERE IT IS!! FINALLY!

*Requests are open*

STUBBORN part.II

By the end of the concert, things had calmed down a bit, with Hyunjin staying on IV drips to help with dehydration. After a few minutes, the members appeared in the room, Chan being in full dad mode.

- Did he get examined?

- Yes, after Minho came down with him, he threw up a few more times, that's why they set an IV. The doctor said it's a pretty bad stomach bug.

- That explains a lot.

- How are you feeling now, Hyunjin-ah?

Minho asked with a menacing expression. You knew what he was going to say after so you tried your best to hold your laughter.

- Better. The best I felt since morning.

- Oh, yeah that's good. You know what will happen when we get home right? 20 minutes at 180 degrees in the air fryer.

- Yes, hyungnim.

The threat made everyone laugh for the first time that day. And that's exactly what happened later but, since he had caught a stomach bug, things were far from being over.

The members took about 40 minutes to change and get everything ready to return to the dorms, long enough for the IV drip to finish. The concert venue was a little far from the dorms, so the ride back would take about an hour, or two if there was traffic.

- Kids, everyone's ready? Grabbed everything?

- Yes, hyung!

- Let's go then.

You turned to Hyunjin and got up from your seat and stood out your hand.

- Can you stand?

- Yes, thanks.

He grabbed your hand, stood up, and pulled you closer for a hug.

- Oh my God you two, let's go already!

Minho said with a disgusting expression. You two couldn't help but laugh, he loved teasing both of you.

Arriving at the van, something deep inside your mind told you to sit more to the front and close to the door, because if he had a stomach bug, things could get bad again.

- Kids, is everyone here? Got everything?

- Yes!

- Alright! Back to the dorms!

The ride started and surprisingly enough, even though they had just finished a full concert, they were still full of energy. Well, it wasn't that surprising, since they were known for their chaotic energy and behavior.

They started talking about the concert, and how the performance lived up to their standards.

They wanted to turn on a life but given Hyunjin's situation and your presence, they thought it would be better not to risk it.

- Hey, Hyunjin-ah, you worked hard today. I'm proud of you.

- Thanks, hyung.

- But, next time listen to us. When you're feeling better we'll talk.

- Yes, hyung.

- But, honestly, you did really well even though you weren't feeling great.

- I didn't want to disappoint STAYs.

- We know.

All of you kept talking about the concert, the best parts, the peculiar things they saw in the audience. It had been a long time since they had this much fun.

Eventually, an important topic came up, food. They were all tired but incredibly hungry as well, and usually, after a concert, the staff would treat them to a banquet.

- So, what are we eating today?

- why don't we go with something everyone likes?

- Pizza?

- Yeah!

For a while, Hyunjin participated in the discussion, but then something deep inside of him started acting up again. The movement of the car, along with the talking was making Hyunjin feel nauseous again, the nausea was building up slowly and he tried to ignore it or deal with it but it was getting stronger.

He decided to sit back and focus his eyes on the road, being aware of the car movement usually helped with car sickness, but this wasn't the case.

You and the boys noticed he'd grown quiet and started to get worried.

- Hey, babe, what's wrong?

- Hyunjin-ah, are you okay?

Chan said putting a hand on the younger's shoulder and giving it a little squeeze.

- I'm feeling a little queasy...

- Kids, let's change the topic and quiet down for a bit.

They started talking more quietly and talked about anything else other than food. You turned your attention to the sick boy sitting beside you.

- Babe, I'm right here.

- Honey, can you hold my hand?

- Sure.

You grabbed his hand and squeezed it a little, reassuring him you were there.

He kept trying to focus on the road, since using his phone in that situation was a big no. But that wasn't working, so he closed his eyes and tried to focus on his breathing and your touch, as you started rubbing his hand.

It seemed to work for a while, but then the van entered a bumpy road and the car wouldn't stop jumping and each movement made Hyunjin's stomach twist and turn.

He felt cold sweat on his neck and back and a burning sensation growing stronger on his chest, he squeezed your hand even tighter, until his knuckles turned white.

-Hey, what is it?

- I really don't feel good...

He felt the contents of his stomach sloshing around and then coming up his throat and started to swallow convulsively, trying to die down the urge to vomit.

- Try to breathe, babe. I'm right here.

He just nodded to your instruction and kept on trying to breathe and swallow, but the road condition wasn't helping. The van hit a rather big bump making the car move harshly and the sudden movement sent Hyunjin's stomach over the edge.

He felt hot liquid hitting the back of his throat, and jerked forward covering his mouth. It took everything in his power to warn you.

- I'm gonna be sick-

- Chan! Pull over!

Chan quickly grabbed a hold of the situation and told the manager to pull over, thankfully they were close to a rest area.

As soon as the van stopped, Chan stormed out of the vehicle and ran to open the door on Hyunjin's side.

- Here, I've got you.

He helped Hyunjin off the van and the young boy immediately bent over the moment he was out of the van, vomit coming out of his mouth violently. He coughed before another stream came out contracting his stomach and arching his back so forcefully, he felt out of breath and swayed forward, almost falling. Thankfully Chan, was by his side to hold him, he wrapped his arms around Hyunjin's body and guided him down to his knees.

- Hey, hey, I've got you, you're safe.

He kept rubbing his back while Hyunjin continued to vomit, each wave making him even more breathless and painful.

You grabbed a water bottle from your bag and made your way to Chan and Hyunjin.

You kneeled next to Hyunjin and started rubbing his stomach as well.

- Oh babe. you're doing good. Let everything out.

Meanwhile, in the van, the boys were clearly worried for Hyunjin, they'd never seen him that sick.

- Minho-hyung, will he be okay?

- Yes. It's just a stomach bug. A nasty one.

They kept talking, some decided to scroll through their phones to distract themselves from what was happening. And then they noticed Felix had gone quiet all of a sudden.

- Hey, Felix, you good?

- I don't know...

Only after taking in his dongsaeng complexion, Minho remembered a very important detail: Felix had a really sensitive gag reflex.

- Oh shit. Felix, look at me. You're okay, alright? Changbin-ah, open the door.

Changbin did as he was told and Minho got outside the van and went immediately to Felix's side.

- Hey, Felix, look at me, alright? focus on me.

Do you have your headphones with you?

- No-I I forgot them at home...

- Kids, can someone lend me a headphone?

- Here, hyung.

- Thanks. Felix put this on.

Minho knew Felix could get sick by seeing someone else being sick or hearing the sound, hence why he asked for the headphones. Once Felix put them on, Minho checked him one more time and noticed that he was shaking a bit, so he grabbed the younger's hands and squeezed them, bringing Felix's attention somewhere else.

- Felix, you're okay. Take deep breaths and focus on the music playing on the headphones. I'm right here with you.

Felix followed Minho's instructions and closed his eyes, focusing on his breathing. He paid attention to every movement his body made as he breathed and the comforting touch from his hyung. Eventually, he was able to calm down and the eerie feeling he began to feel earlier, had gone away.

- I'm okay now, hyung. Thanks...

- No problem. But don't take off the headphones, alright?

- Okay.

On the other side of the van, Hyunjin kept throwing up, his stomach not giving him a single break. It contracted painfully, arching his back and expelling everything, making his throat hurt from all the acid.

- It hurts...

- I know babe...You'll be fine, don't worry.

But the situation was getting too much, he felt pain all over his body, and his head was now pounding from all the strain it was going through. He started to feel panicked, he felt the world spin even though he was completely still, his vision was starting to get blurry and started to shake as well.

- Y/n... I'm feeling out of breath... I feel faint.

Chan guided Hyunjin to sit on the ground and held him close to his body. You positioned yourself in front of him and grabbed his hands.

- Hey, hey, hey. Look at me, honey. Look at me.

If you start to hyperventilate now, you'll only make yourself sick again.

You started rubbing his hands in patterns and told him to follow your breathing, while Chan held him and rubbed his chest to help the younger feel calmer.

- we're right here with you. There. You're doing good, my love. Keep going.

After a few minutes following this pattern, his breathing was under control again, but the nausea persisted. Without much warning, his stomach made him lurch forward, vomit coming out of his mouth hitting the ground, and a bit on your clothes. Chan kept holding him and rubbing his chest.

- I'm sorry...

- No. Don't apologize. It's okay.

- Don't worry Hyunjin-ah.

After that wave, he was left dry heaving. You gave him some water to rinse his mouth.

- Think we go back into the van now?

- Yes...

- Can you stand?

- No... I feel dizzy...

- Alright.

Chan put Hyunjin's arm over his shoulder while wrapping his other arm around the younger's waist and carefully stood up. He stopped for a moment to make sure Hyunjin felt grounded.

- You good? Can we walk?

- Yes, hyung...

You helped Chan take Hyunjin back to the van and settle him. You both stayed with him for a while to make sure he was feeling okay before entering the van yourselves.

- Can we go back to the dorm now? Hyunjin-ah, you sure you're okay?

- Yes, hyung

- And you Felix, you good?

Minho asked getting Chan's attention.

- What happened?

Minho whispered in Chan's ear, just so he wouldn't upset Hyunjin. That's the last thing he wanted.

- Felix's gag reflex acted up while you guys were outside.

- Really? Did he get sick?

- Thankfully no. I was able to calm him down.

- Good. Thank you. Let's go back home. We need to rest.

The rest of the ride home was uneventful, Hyunjin didn't get sick again, and Felix was fine as well. But you knew Hyunjin still felt sick, you could tell from the look in his eyes it was taking everything in his power to endure the ride back home.

Arriving at the building, the manager drove the car to the garage, to give the boys and you some privacy and safety. When the car stopped, everyone got out of the van but one, Hyunjin.

- Babe, what's wrong?

- I really don't feel good...I don't think I have any strength to walk...

As he spoke you noticed how shaky and pale he was. It broke your heart to see him so vulnerable, so sad, and in pain. You just wanted your cheerful and dramatic ball of sunshine back.

Chan instructed the members to head up first and get things ready for Hyunjin, while he helped you guide the sick boy to the elevator.

- Hyunjin-ah, can you walk?

- No... I feel lightheaded...

- I'll help you, okay?

- Sorry, hyung.

- Don't apologize. Come on.

Chan wrapped his arms around Hyunjin and carefully guided him out of the van, you following behind with all of your stuff.

Before Chan began walking he waited a moment to make sure Hyunjin wasn't feeling faint.

- Can we go?

- Hm.

The boy just hummed in response. The walk from the van to the elevator wasn't long, but for Hyunjin it felt like they were crossing the country on foot. And you were walking very slowly, so as not to risk Hyunjin fainting.

But each step was a challenge, he felt as if his legs were made of jelly, and even the smallest of movements were making his stomach angry. Halfway through to the elevator, his stomach decided it had enough of the walking and sent hot liquid up his chest. He felt it hitting the back of his throat and his mouth immediately filled with sour liquid. He just tugged Chan's clothes as a warning, which the leader understood and was quick to halt the movement.

Hyunjin bent forward and didn't have enough time to get his hand away from his mouth before vomiting, so it spilled through his fingers, hitting the ground with a sickening sound.

Chan kept holding him, and rubbing his chest and you stayed by your boyfriend's side rubbing his back.

- Oh my poor babe. Let it out.

He belched and that brought up even more watery vomit, making him bend even further. And if it wasn't for Chan, Hyunjin would've already fallen.

- I've got you, don't worry. Straighten your back, Hyunjin-ah.

Chan kept rubbing his chest to help with the nausea.

After a while, he said that he felt like nothing would come up. You cleaned his hand and helped him rinse his mouth before you could reach the elevator.

When you three finally arrived at the apartment, the boys had already prepared a bath for Hyunjin.

- Hyung, the bath is ready.

- Thank you.

- And Hyunjin? Why did you take so long?

- He threw up again...

- Oh my God.

- Where are Minho and Felix?

- Apparently, Felix wasn't feeling that good, so Minho-hyung went to the bedroom with him.

- Okay. I'll check on them.

- Y/n, take Hyunjin to the bath, I'll ask Minho to help you.

- Okay.

IN THE BEDROOM

From what the boys told Chan, Felix wasn't feeling great when they reached the dorms, so the leader went to check on him. When he got to the bedroom, he found Felix sitting on the edge of the bed with Minho by his side, rubbing the younger's nape

- Hey. Is everything okay?

- Oh, hyung! Felix's gag reflex acted up earlier and now he said he is feeling queasy.

- Minho, can you go and help y/n give Hyunjin a bath? I think you'd lighten up the mood a little.

- Yes.

- I'll stay here with Felix.

Minho exited the room leaving Felix and Chan alone.

- Hey mate, how are you feeling?

- Weird, I guess...

- Do you think you're gonna be sick?

- Not really. Well, as long as I don't see anything, no. It just feels strange, like a lingering eerie feeling in my stomach.

- Did you take anything?

- Yeah, Minho hyung gave me a nausea pill. It's starting to take effect. I guess I was just a little bit panicked.

- Well, we are all drained from the concert. Why don't we take a bath a just relax?

- Yeah. I'll just wait for Hyunjin to be settled first.

In the bathroom, you helped Hyunjin out of his clothes while Minho checked the water temperature. Fortunately, they had moved dorms and now both of their dorms had bathtubs since Hyunjin was in no state to take a bath standing up.

Minho helped him get into the bathtub and sit down.

- Are you okay?

- Hmm.

- Is the water good?

- Yes...

You decided to leave them and go get a change of clothes for Hyunjin.

- Hey, Hyunjin-ah, are you feeling okay?

- For now yes...

- I'll turn around so you can take your bath, just say something if you feel sick again.

- Alright...

After about 15 minutes, Hyunjin finished his bath without any incidents.

You opened the door to the bathroom and gave Minho the clothes you picked for Hyunjin and waited outside for them.

Minho helped Hyunjin out of the bathtub and walked out of the bathroom holding him so he wouldn't fall. At this time, his hyung's support was everything keeping him from passing out.

The bath felt heavenly because on top of smelling like vomit, he was sweaty from the concert. But at the same time, it relaxed him too much, to the point he felt like all his strength left his body, for real this time.

- Hyung...I feel dizzy...

- Okay, let's sit down.

Minho went to the living room with Hyunjin and you followed them.

The older carefully helped the boy sit down on the couch and he immediately slouched.

- How are you feeling now, babe?

- A little better, but completely drained...

- No wonder... and the nausea?

- Seems to be gone for now...

- Think you can stomach something in a while?

- Maybe...

- Okay then, I'll prepare something for you.

- Let us do the cooking, Y/n. You can go shower first.

- Are you sure? It's no problem at all for me.

- Yes. You're tired as well.

- Thank you.

You really wanted to take a bath, considering you had vomit on your clothes but at the same time, you're the one with the most energy out of everyone in that dorm, so you wanted to help. But the boys were always very caring about you so things like this made you happy.

You went to Hyunjin's bedroom to grab some of his clothes for you before heading to the bathroom, leaving the sick boy in the living room with the other members.

After a while, Felix came out of the bedroom, he was looking much calmer and his complexion was better as well. He went to Hyunjin's side and gave him a hug, which Hyunjin returned.

- I'm sorry Felix, for making you feel sick.

- Oh that! No no no, don't apologize. It's my fault for not being cautious with myself.

- And are you feeling okay now?

- Yes. And you? How are you feeling?

-  A little better. At least the nausea seems settled for now. I just feel really weak...

- Do you want to watch something?

- I don't know... I can't really trust my stomach right now... I'm afraid that all the movement might make me feel sick again...

- It's okay.

After what to Hyunjin, seemed like an eternity, you came out of the shower, wearing his clothes. He couldn't help but blush at the sight of the beautiful person in front of him, even though you've been dating for a few years, there were times he felt like he was seeing you for the first time.

He grabbed you by the waist and guided you to sit by his side and placed a kiss on your cheek.

- You look absolutely beautiful.

- Oh stop it, babe. I take it you're feeling better? For you to be all lovey-dovey

- My stomach seems settled for now...

- That's good. Thank heavens. But I'll just wait for your brothers to get themselves comfortable and then we'll talk.

- Yes.

After everyone took their baths and eaten, they all gathered in the living room to have a serious talk with Hyunjin.

- Hyunjin-ah, I wanna start by saying that you did really well today, despite not being well. However, this can not happen again. You need to listen to us and your body as well. You weren't feeling good since morning, we heard you throwing up, we asked you and you chose to tell us you were fine. I asked y/n to talk to you because I thought you'd listen to them. You got sick during rehearsal and almost got sick during the actual concert.

Can you imagine what could've happened if you'd gotten sick onstage? STAYs would get worried and that could cause panic.

- I'm really sorry, hyung. I really wanted to perform.

- We understand you but you need to think ahead, if you decide to perform while being sick, you could end up having to sit out other performances. Listen to your body, what if on top of being sick, you fainted onstage?

- I'm really really sorry for worrying you and you, y/n. I didn't want it to be like this.

- Just, listen to your hyungs next time okay? And y/n as well. We just want your well-being.

- I understand, hyung.

At this moment, Hyunjin was already crying. He didn't feel it coming, tears just fell. The thought of upsetting and worrying the members and you was practically unbearable. He began to sob and tremble and you, Chan, and Minho were quick to help.

- Hey, hey hey, breathe, Hyunjin-ah. You're gonna make yourself sick again.

Chan sit beside him and started rubbing his chest, trying to calm down the younger boy. You kept by his side holding his hand and reassuring him none of you were mad. And Minho positioned himself in front of him and tried to guide the sick boy through breathing patterns to help him calm down.

But it wasn't working, he tried to pay attention to everything all 3 of you were doing, but the crying made him swallow too much saliva and his stomach did not agree with that.

He could feel it revolting and something creeping up his chest and muffled a burp with his hand. Upon noticing this, Minho quickly grabbed a trash can and placed it underneath Hyunjin's mouth.

- Hey, if you're feeling sick you need to let it out.

He didn't want to, his throat was hurting and so was his stomach but his body did not want to keep that in. He bent forward, opening his mouth as vomit escaped from his mouth hitting the trash can with a sickening sound, making you grimace a little. Minho stood up from his position and placed a hand on Hyunjin's back gently pressing it down while you rubbed it, and Chan kept rubbing his chest.

- That's it, you're okay. We're right here with you.

All it took was a few seconds for Chan and Minho to realize Felix was close to them.

- Shit, hey Changbin-ah, take Felix to the bedroom!

- Ok!

Changbin wrapped his arms around Felix and guided the boy to his room before anything could happen.

After a few minutes, Hyunjin's stomach was empty again and left the boy gagging unproductively.

- Babe, you don't have anything on your stomach.

He just spat out thick saliva before you handed him a bottle of water to rinse his mouth.

- How are you feeling now?

- A little better, now that something came out.

- Think you take some medicine now?

- Yeah...

You have him a nausea pill, which took effect rather quickly. In about 30 minutes Hyunjin was feeling better and was even willing to watch some movies with the members. Upon noticing this, Minho gave a menacing look to the long-haired boy. You looked at him and immediately looked away, covering your mouth trying to surpass a laugh.

- Hey, Hyunjin-ah.

- Yes, hyung?

- Are you feeling better? Hm?

- Now yes.

- Ah, really? Good. That's good. You know you worried the hell out of us today, right?

- I know. I'm sorry.

- No, it's okay. But you know what we'll happen right? 20 minutes in the air fryer at 180 degrees.

- Yes, hyungnim.

You and the boys couldn't help but laugh while Minho stood there looking Hyunjin dead in the eye, which made the situation even more hilarious.

The night went on without any incidents, with you and the boys agreeing to watch a horror movie together. Everyone gathered in the living room, with mattresses, and slept there, while you slept hugging Hyunjin.

After such a tiring day, ending it with rain pouring outside and everyone together in that cozy living room, was everything all of you needed.

[angelamajiki]

PARINGS: Pro Hero! Dabi x Sister! Reader

TW: yandere, incest, no con, voyeurism, choking, burning, unprotected/no prep sex, breeding/creampies, snowballing, public sex, degradation, lots of dirty talk

AN: WHEEWW my first fic in a while, so excited for my first join intro collab!! thank you to the lovely jo for writing it <33 enjoy

A BNHarem Server Collab! Check out the other works here.

Breaking news: We have yet another report to add to the slew of attacks this month, this comes just days after we broadcast rumours of villains running rampant over the city. This spate of attacks has put the entire metropolitan area at a standstill, road closures and damaged property making it difficult for commuters to get to work in the morning. Road maintenance endeavour to do its best to keep the city running, but it seems futile when these attacks continue to increase. The entire city was brought to a standstill by the mysterious villain who has still not been named, but reports show they are nothing like we have ever experienced before.

Where are the heroes now? Who will save us from the terror overwhelming our city?

Every day the crime toll continues to rise and we have no one here to protect us. The Hero Public Safety Commission assured us earlier in the week that the crime rate would go down, that the top Heroes are out there protecting our city, but if so, where are they? Is it really safe to go out anymore, who can we trust? Would you put your life in the hands of a Hero today? When they have proved our streets are no longer safe. We still have no information on what is going on, or who is involved but we must remain observant. We will continue to report the latest news as we receive it, but for now, we must implore you to heed the warnings of the city-wide curfew that is soon to be implemented. If anyone has any information on these occurrences in the city please send them to us or contact the police, you can remain anonymous. The safety of our citizens is what is most important, stay vigilant and don’t go out unless it is absolutely necessary.

Christ, what a load of bullshit the news was nowadays. Constantly whining and squealing about what heroes did and didn’t do, promoting fear-mongering like it was the hottest trend. Between your father and two older brothers dedicating their life to the cause of justice, the world always felt just a little safer to you, the naive little thing that you were. And tonight was no exception.

Despite the rapidly increasing crime rates, your judgment to grab a couple of drinks in the city with your friends was hardly swayed. The stress of it all was getting to you and you’d love nothing more to drink your heart out at one of the few spots still left open. It was a sleazy place, but it was fun. If anything, you found a bar in the area where your eldest brother was currently stationed patrolling.

Touya had always been protective of you ever since the two of you were children, and he carried that same possessiveness well into your adulthood. Always chasing off any potential suitors, keeping you out of trouble, and generally being a menace to anyone who thought they were good enough to be around his favorite little sister.

By the end of the night, stumbling around drunkenly was the only thing keeping you upright as you made your way out of the club and onto the street, looking for a taxi to get you home. Sirens wailed faintly in the distance, a mess of blue and red lighting up the darkened streets.

“Hey sweetheart. Need a hand?”

Grubby hands met your arms the same time the cool air of the night did, tugging and pulling at you to come closer, wherever that may be. Jaunts and laughter echoed off the buildings, only adding to the haziness the alcohol induced. “What’s a pretty little thing like yourself doing out here all on your lonesome?”

Weak attempts to push the group of assaulters off you were in vain as they groped and squeezed your body at their pleasure. “Come on, we’re just trying to keep ya company. Right, boys?”

“Stop..”

Your whine came across much more pathetic than you could have ever hoped, only earning more chuckles from the men. “Just relax, sweetheart. We’ll take good care of you.”

Blue flames danced around the group of you, closing the lot of you against the building wall in a small circle of fire.

“Will you now? Last I checked, I'm the only man suited for that.” Touya was less than amused to have found out from Fuyumi that you traveled into the city given its state, even more so when he saw how drunk and disorderly you were being.

“T-Touya-nii!”

The men untangled themselves from you with ease, tossing you into the arms of your expectant brother, who was more than glad to pull you into a tight embrace. “Shit! It's the number three, Heatstroke!”

The comforting warmth of his body and scent of his cologne settled your frantic nerves, tucking yourself closer into his arms. “Honestly, it’s like you're asking for it at this point.”

Your heart sank low in your chest, but you couldn't find the strength to move away from him as he scowled down at you.

“Look at what you're wearing, you little tease. Bet you would have loved to have them violate you, huh slut?”

Never has Touya been so venomous with you before; it made your heart hurt, even more, to see your beloved nii-san be so cruel.

“Don’t you worry, that’s why your big brother is here to show you who you really belong to.”

Shoved against the wall, he pinned your trembling form with his right knee in between your legs and his hands wandering over your skimpy dress.

“You boys can stick around to watch; let a real man show you how it's done.”

Flames singed at your dress, burning it to ashes to expose you in the cool wind of the night. Hot fingers pressed into your skin, littering marks in their wake before they wrapped around your throat. “You were just begging for nii-san to come to save your slutty ass, huh, princess? I know you checked my patrol schedule before ending up at this dive.”

His hand tightened around your neck, his lips at your ear. “Wanted nii-san to come put you in your place, yeah? After fuckin’ teasing me all these years, you finally cracked me. Are you proud of yourself, little girl?”

A whine slipped from your constricted throat, your smaller hand gripping at the large one squeezing you with everything it had. “And now you've got an audience to witness my ownership over you. You're mine, little girl.”

Finally releasing your throat, his hands traveled down to your chest and groped at your roughly, pinching and pulling at your soft, sensitive nipples. Bile was rising in your throat as you drowned in your own fear, feeling him drag you into the depths of depravity.

“What’s the matter, imouto? I thought you said I was your favorite. You're hurting my feelings, y’know.”

“Touya, please-”

A scoff slapped you hard in the face as his knee jerked up against your cunt. “Don’t start with me. I know who you really are and what you really want, even better than yourself.”

His words stabbed at your heart, and his wandering hands only seemed to pour salt over the wounds. “You’re nothing more than my whore, little sister.”

Hips ground against your backside in a slow, teasing manner, groans pushing past his lips as he did so. “You have no one to blame but yourself.”

His erection was pressed flush against you, straining in his pants before he unzipped himself. At this point, you were more than sobered up running on fear and adrenaline alone. Your panties were ripped clean off with his free hand while the other stroked his hardening cock. “Look at me.”

The tip was aligned with your hole, rubbing slightly to gather the minimal wetness between your lips. “I said look at me.”

Teary eyes peaked up at him through wet lashes, silently pleading with a man who was not known for mercy.

“Good fuckin’ girl, so obedient for your big brother.”

With one snap of his hips, Touya fully sheathed himself inside of your tight cunt, groaning at the way you squealed for him. “Aw, you like that, huh, princess. Feeling good?”

A warbled moan was the only response you could give him as he slowly began to pull out. The alcohol had you buzzing enough to block out the pain of the stretch, and damn did you feel filled to the brim.

“Can’t wait to breed this greedy little cunt of yours.”

His pace was slow, agonizingly so. Touya couldn't help but savor every second of the first time having been inside you, especially after dreaming about it for so long. God, if it didn't turn him on to have an audience, knowing that these men knew he was fucking his sister.

What would the media think? God, the news cycle would be ripped to shreds tomorrow over this breaking story. But hey, no PR is bad PR.

The thought of finally having staked his claim in you almost had him coming prematurely, but he had to hold out for your very first time together, and it certainly wouldn't be the last.

Heh, your crying face was so cute. Those tears weren't shy by any means and neither were your sobs. It's alright, you’ll learn to love being Touya’s cocksleeve.

“Say you love me.”

An impossible request when you're being violated by the person you held dearest to your heart.

His pace had picked up brutally, slamming into you without care for his flames spreading wildly nor the group of assaulters who seemed to vanish once they had the opening to.

“I-I love you, nii-san! I love you!”

Your cries were shrill and whiny, echoing into the chaotic night. The grip on your hips was heating up, so much so that his handprints were burned into your love handles.

“Good girl, good little slut.”

His breathing was erratic, hot against your neck as he growled and grunted into your ear. “Gonna let nii-san breed this pretty little pussy? Yes, you are. I know you are because you're fuckin’ mine, bitch.”

Moaning out your name, Touya came deep inside your womb, thick ropes of his cum painting your insides. You were soon to follow thanks to his thumb against your clit, causing you to writhe and whine in his arms.

Utterly spent, you rested against the brick wall you were pinned to, feeling the cum drip out of your still filled hole.

“Let’s get you home and into my bed, princess. I gotta go have a chat with Dad and Shouto, let ‘em know you’re fully off limits now.”

— tagging: @libiraki @bonesoftheimpala @tomurasprincess @sightoru

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: Don't get excited or anything Janis: only talking to you to look busy Jimmy: steal my job an' all or just my lines? Jimmy: so proud me Janis: technically I got you fired from that one Janis: and not to get ahead in the java game myself so Jimmy: fucked my future as a recruiter that Jimmy: tah very much Janis: 💔 Janis: what can I say? Janis: your chat has left a lot to be desired from the start Janis: though I'd happily pick up a CG shift now, nothing to do with your skillz or lack thereof Jimmy: You could've started this one with 'oi Jim don't put persuasive on the CV' and have done, mate but here we still are pissing about Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Jimmy: use your head and pick up a shift where Pete works now not where he burned his bridges if you want the good chat, girl Janis: Yeah 'cos you want me interrupting your bromance time more than I already do Janis: reverse psychology won't work on me either, boy Jimmy: Tell it to the lad who's rewriting a birthday classic in your honor 'cause that ain't me, babe Jimmy: Still got it bad after all this time he has 💘 Jimmy: #thejulieteffect Janis: God, Gracie didn't slip him an invite as a tip, did she Janis: will have to maim my face to avoid any further association with her, like Jimmy: Might've Jimmy: Much as we throw Shona on that Gracie sized bullet she's nowt but persistent Janis: Desperate is the word Janis: invite half the town, why not Janis: no girl needs that many 'idk you really so I got you a bath set' gifts Jimmy: Alright, alright I'll take yours back to the shop Jimmy: Calm down Janis: bung it her way Janis: still might get some 'gratitude' 🤞 Jimmy: 👌 Janis: cool so it's a plan Janis: you distract, I'll make myself scarce Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: it's not known to be challenging Janis: but we have just discussed your shortcomings too so yeah Janis: maybe baby Jimmy: having her about when I ain't being paid is proper challenging Jimmy: you wanna sweeten the deal, rich girl Janis: Hmm, what you got in mind? Jimmy: we both make ourselves scarce Jimmy: I reckon that's a better plan Janis: maybe ain't earned persuasive still but Janis: you can tick off problem solver Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: ain't gonna be a problem if have the dickheads in town have an invite to your gaff Jimmy: slip away easy through that #opendoor Jimmy: half* Janis: you forget I'm 1 outta 2 guests of honour Janis: sadly, you are the only one on that score Jimmy: Nah Jimmy: nobody but Pete's coming for you, babe and we can slip him a note ahead of time Janis: You really know how to make a girl feel special, huh 😏 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: is it worth me coming to you Janis: how long you got left on Jimmy: both feeling special now Jimmy: how #goals Janis: well you know Janis: hit up the CG already and the replacements aren't much Jimmy: 💔 for 'em and you Janis: don't look too 😢 for me when I show Janis: not #goals Jimmy: Drying my eyes on my apron as we speak, like Janis: need your 😎 Jimmy: that's alright til the fans wanna see my 😍 Janis: who are you kidding, Doris can't see in front of her face Janis: it's the accent Jimmy: she can see my 🍆 Jimmy: keeps her coming back Janis: please don't make me laugh Jimmy: sexual harassment is no laughing matter, dickhead Jimmy: she's a menace 👵🚫 Janis: you know you're asking for it, babe Janis: made your granny love no secret Jimmy: when I'm not 😢 over you I'm 🤤 over her Jimmy: busted Janis: can't fool me Janis: know what you're like far too well tbh Jimmy: see right through me you Jimmy: only gonna get more of a bighead the older you get, aren't you? Janis: don't plan on changing Janis: not that kind of birthday girl Jimmy: 👍 Janis: dunno why she's bothering Janis: 'less she can get Pete to fake marry her she ain't even competing Jimmy: shut up, he'd get a decent amount of song writing material outta that Jimmy: enough to consider it Jimmy: don't be giving ideas like that out for nowt Janis: so you're saying recruiters out for you but pimp/band manager is my calling Janis: cheers, keep it in mind Jimmy: can't be living off mummy and daddy forever, babe Jimmy: time's running out Janis: they're running out of kids who wanna be around them, more like Janis: you know they don't wanna be left just them and Gracie Jimmy: Give 'em the heads up and they'll have time to have a load more Janis: 💀💀💀 Jimmy: 💸💸💸 Janis: if they do, not me Janis: and all the others Janis: splitting it 10 ways makes it less impressive Jimmy: actually 💔 Janis: I know Janis: babysitting is your primary gig Janis: soz, like Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: Poor, poor boy Janis: have to stick with your two Jimmy: You still ain't taken the 🐶 off me yet so it's 3 Janis: if you put 'dog dad' in your bio it's over Jimmy: saved that 💎 for the dating apps Janis: fairplay Janis: go over well with that crowd Jimmy: 🐶💕 Jimmy: gotta earn her keep somehow Janis: subtle Janis: what do you want, like Jimmy: other than 🐶💀 Janis: you love her, shut up Jimmy: bollocks Jimmy: you love her Janis: I know what I've 👀 Janis: and I've got plenty of blackmail evidence for when this all goes tits Jimmy: I know how to fake it Jimmy: tah for all the practise Janis: mhmm, 'cos you did such a top job at that Jimmy: 🥇 me Janis: Sure thing babe Janis: best bae ever Janis: fake enough for you? Jimmy: might be if you didn't mean every word Janis: Idiot Jimmy: you love me Jimmy: and you're on your way here, deny it Janis: I can't deny I'm en-route Janis: but that's like 96% because I need to hide Janis: no funny business Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: only thirsty for a fruit juice Janis: I ain't a toddler Janis: and obviously, I ain't looking for you to serve me either 🤷 Jimmy: you ain't a coffee drinker and we don't serve booze, pisshead Janis: 1. I'm gonna subtly wait for Pete to be free 2. we'll think of something Jimmy: 1. enjoy helping him close 2. he won't be thinking of owt when he's this hungover so enjoy doing that yourself an' all Janis: 🙄🙄 Janis: not entirely sure you barista boys are worth the hassle Jimmy: on you go then Jimmy: find a barman and solve all your problems Janis: no tah Janis: can't be going there Jimmy: 🎻💔🎻 Janis: it'd be like you cracking on with a miner Janis: assume your granddad was a miner Jimmy: be like me having a go on a 👻 Janis: can make that happen Janis: that kinda cool girlfriend, obvs Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Janis: find out the equipment Janis: not talking 🍆🤖s Jimmy: so I'll meet you in the cemetery or what? Jimmy: #datenight Janis: Such an emo Janis: called it and you out from day one Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: You reckoned I wanted to suck Alex Turner's ballsack Jimmy: Indie and emo are different genres, mate Janis: It's all fringes and marding really, isn't it, mate Janis: point is, ghosts are everywhere Janis: have as much if not more luck in any house in this shithole of a town Jimmy: proper poetic you Jimmy: I smell a lyrical collab with your bf Janis: nah Janis: we both know muse is about as good as I got Jimmy: but there's no need to pass that along to Pete and have him 💔 Janis: Shut up Janis: he loves me just the way I am, and YOU'RE just jealous Jimmy: #duh Janis: if I wanted that kind of guilt-trip, I'd have stayed there Jimmy: The orchestra is raring to go here Jimmy: What more do you want? Janis: you Janis: dickhead Jimmy: I'm yours, dickhead Janis: Good Janis: I need you, like Jimmy: We don't need to be here, either of us Janis: I can't Janis: I can't be anywhere near that fucking party tomorrow Janis: it's not just because it's the usual bullshit family function either, like Janis: just Janis: nah Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: good thing I have a better idea Janis: Yeah? Jimmy: Nowt for you to do but come with me Janis: Alright Janis: obviously Janis: never gonna have better plans or better company 'round here so Jimmy: 🥇 Jimmy: come here and we'll go from there Janis: I am Janis: I'd almost forgot how long this bus took Janis: been that long, like Jimmy: you should be live tweeting Jimmy: fans love a throwback Janis: well, we both know what I should really be doing Janis: but ain't really feeling it and this bus driver is new Jimmy: 🤞 our top bloke ain't 💀💀💀 Jimmy: weren't meant to be part of the pact, like Janis: if he was on the outs, I'd have 💀 him at the wheel ages ago Janis: just that good Janis: call me the eternal optimist Jimmy: 🌹 by any other name Janis: peak romance always Jimmy: 💪🏆 Jimmy: you ain't seen nowt yet birthday girl Janis: Idiot Jimmy: 💕 Janis: do I need to bring anything Janis: not fishing for clues or nowt but could be relevant Jimmy: bring whatever you would to fuck off for a day Jimmy: we ain't coming back til its over Janis: okay Janis: just us? Jimmy: you can bring the dog if you want Janis: 😏 Jimmy: I draw the line at Pete's puppy dog eyes though Janis: 💔 Jimmy: You'll live and he's half 💀 so there ain't no challenge in smacking him down Janis: Hot Jimmy: 😏 Janis: is that my surprise? Jimmy: Do you want that to be your surprise? Janis: Yeah, I'm gonna be an accessory by admission Janis: think on, babe Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Your man of mystery bit is very unhelpful sometimes Jimmy: poor baby Jimmy: soz you can't handle being kept on your toes Janis: oh please Jimmy: What? Janis: I could run circles around you in my sleep Jimmy: go on then Janis: maybe Janis: if the plans allow time Jimmy: maybe I'll make time if it's that important to you to prove yourself, Juliet Janis: I know I don't need to prove myself to you Jimmy: 👌 Janis: fuck off Janis: you love me Jimmy: You're alright, for a rich girl Janis: I'm the best Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt babe Janis: #duh Jimmy: #youknowthedrill Janis: town is finally in sight Janis: jesus Jimmy: the new driver ain't winning me over 💔 for him Jimmy: sort it out knobhead Jimmy: 🎅 will get there before his bus, like Janis: N'awh Janis: you missed me? Jimmy: for a sec or two Jimmy: not owt to get a big head over Janis: have to work on that then, won't I Jimmy: hate for you to be bored while you're waiting for Pete to make you a drink Jimmy: gotta give you something to do Jimmy: it'll take him ages longer than two secs Janis: weird brag, mate Janis: usually the other way 'round but admire the honesty 😂 Jimmy: been a bit since I've made shit weird Jimmy: nice to know you've missed it Janis: you know Janis: keeps things interesting, you do Jimmy: Yeah Jimmy: part of the deal, like Janis: I'll renew your contract Janis: 👌 job Jimmy: tah Jimmy: might take you off the trial period for a bit Jimmy: see how you go Janis: 😏 Janis: might not hand in my notice Jimmy: won't have to get a replacement in then Janis: 💔 Janis: know how you love that Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Jimmy: keep disappointing me, you Janis: psh Jimmy: It's alright, well used to it, me Jimmy: nowt I can't handle Janis: We'll put that theory to the test when I get there Janis: 5 mins Jimmy: good Janis: thanks Janis: by the way Jimmy: you ain't opened your bath shit yet Jimmy: leave it out Janis: I've got to work on my so real surprise/grattitude some time, babe Janis: want me to fake it when I'm there Janis: alright Jimmy: that top job you reckoned I did faking it goes double for you, girl Jimmy: I ain't helping Pete close so you've got more time to piss about having a go Janis: Not how I remember it, boy Jimmy: scroll back through all your feeds Jimmy: I'll hang on Janis: admitting you're more #basic Janis: cute Jimmy: surprise! 🎉 Jimmy: happy birthday Janis: 😍😋 Jimmy: 💘 Janis: love you Jimmy: I love you Janis: I really do Jimmy: Is it my turn to act surprised or what? Janis: You can Jimmy: #kinkunlocked Jimmy: ages after I thought we'd run out Janis: just that good, baby Jimmy: I'll give you a few minutes Jimmy: deffo worth that Janis: and so generous Janis: 😩 Jimmy: too northern for that shit Janis: Nah Janis: this place has changed you Janis: 🍀💀 Jimmy: If owt's changed take your share of the blame Jimmy: 💕🔪💀 Janis: alright Janis: I ruined your life Janis: do something about it

[revchainsaw]

Demolition Man (1993)

I am by no means an Action Movie guy. I have however time and time again found myself surprised by the genre when it has found its way into my viewing habits. The first Action Movie that really impressed me was Die Hard. I watched it one Christmas as I searched for more unusual holiday fare and was utterly blown away. I felt as if I should seek out more of these films. I got as far as Lethal Weapon 2 before I retreated back to the world of absurd horror and sci-fi. If not for the power of cultural osmosis and the question of the 3 shells i might not have worked up the interest to check out 1993's Demolitions Man. I was expecting a typical cop vs criminal action flick starring Stallone, but what I found was an absolutely delightful Science Fiction Comedy.

The Message

Released in 1993 Demolition man starts right out of the gate with a hilariously pessimistic prediction that by the year 1996 every city in America will be Gotham on crack. The Joker of this film is Simon Phoenix and though he lacks the circus act accoutrement he is absolutely a clown prince of crime. I would not be surprised to discover Heath Ledger took inspiration from Snipes for his turn as an agent of chaos. Phoenix is an unstoppable force and in Stallone he finds his immoveable object, John Spartan (God I love these action movie names), a cop who will walk through hell itself to see this mad man brought to justice. However in his blind pursuit of his greatest enemy Spartan is easily coaxed into making reckless decisions, resulting in unnecessary fatalities. Both Spartan and Phoenix are thus sentenced to cryogenic prison sentences.

In 2032, Phoenix is thawed out for a parole hearing and of course things go as you might expect. Phoenix finds that he has changed, someone has used scifi shenanigans on him while he was frozen giving him abilities both mental and physical that he had not had before, hinting at some kind of conspiracy, he also finds that this was overkill as even the unmodified Phoenix would not have had any trouble conquering the world of 2032. Society has become utopian and nobody has a concept of using physical force to resolve issues. This leads the police of the time to make the controversial decision to thaw out Spartan to bring down the villain.

Hilarity ensues as Sandra Bullocks character, Lenina Huxley (awesome name once again; named after the author of Brave New World), is tasked with keeping the primitive 90s action hero in line with the moral imperatives of the time. This includes avoiding violence, not using naughty words, a vegetarian diet, and socially distanced sexual intercourse (a gag at the time but in the real life 2020's may have been a welcome invention).

Without giving too much more away, this future peace comes at a great cost to personal freedom and expression and there is a society of free people living in the fringes of society known as Scraps lead by a civil rights leader of sorts named Friendly. There is a sinister conspiracy to wipe them out that is the central plot contrivance that brought our forces of Good and Evil to face off. The Super Phoenix betrays his handlers, seeks to turn this utopia into his personal playground and is eventually defeated by Spartan in the final showdown. Sylvester Stallone eagerly eats a rat burger and Sandra Bullock says a cuss word at one point.

The Benediction

Best Character: Phoenix Rises

Everyone loves a villain. I had mostly known Wesley Snipes from the Blade films and did not know he had this kind of range. I expected very stoic boring bad ass action dialogue from both Stallone and Snipes in this movie, and believed the sci-fi elements would simply be space cars and laser guns but was I wrong. I'm so happy to be wrong. This film just surprised me and Snipes performance as Phoenix was by far the most enjoyable. I loved his menace and the threat that he presented. I don't think there had been such a loveable bastard force of nature character like this portrayed in film so well until this time. He is such a believable threat that I really doubted there was going to be a way to bring him down. It was great to see the other characters underestimate him and to see him not only physically dominate his obstacles but to also out smart and out class his 'puppet masters' was just a pleasure the whole time.

Best Actor: Bullock in the Chamber

I know that Sandra Bullock stars in a ton of comedy films but I've never been able to say that I found her to be particularly funny. She also strangely plays a cop in a lot of these comedies. I may think of Lilina Huxley every time I think of Sandra Bullock from now on. She was absolutely hilarious, deadpan and dedicated to this character in a way that sold the world of 2032 America. I really don't think that the overly sensitive utopic world would have felt like a genuine place where human beings lived and not just a cartoonish backdrop without the honesty that Bullock brought to the role. It's hard to find actors who can inhabit a comedic world as seriously as a Middle Earth. And maybe that's not what she'd like to be remembered for, but I think she deserves that credit.

Best Aspect: a Genre/Genre/Genre Classic

Demolition Man is such a pleasant surprise. No one in this movie seems to begrudge it's wackiness and it lends itself to the humor in a way that lets the audience rest in the assurance that this was a pleasure for the cast and crew as much as it is a pleasure for us. It doesn't sacrifice it's action to be to screwball, and it doesn't sacrifice it's world building to be to absurd. It's a comedy that takes it's self seriously. I can not stress enough that this movie nails several genre's at once. It's a funny comedy, an ideologically committed satire, an exciting action flick, a hard science fiction tale that explores the high concept of the consequences of utopia, and a fantasy that sells it's goofy future world.

Worst Aspect: If Only Cops Were More Violent

I am not a fan of the implications of the film. In the 90s it seemed that PC culture was the big enemy of personal freedom and that giving a shit about other peoples feelings was going to turn our civilization into a bunch of overly sensitive weaklings. This narrative has imbedded itself in our culture and produced a generation of selfish assholes who feel completely justified in their every callous action. Demolition Man is a Libertarian science fiction film, but I find that it's central fiction is just that. I do not believe that committing to non-violent conflict resolutions, considering the feelings of others, and not eating meat will 'neuter' our abilities to live individually free and fulfilling lives. It's a caricature, that while funny, i think is inaccurate. If you are of the mindset that Personal Freedom is at odds with social justice then you may find yourself enjoying the idea that it takes a violent police reaction to save society from it's own worst impulses, but I find that idea fairly fantastical. I think seeing the community stand firm in their convictions and still overcome evil may have been a more ideologically realistic interpretation of how the day can be saved, but instead we are given a lone wolf renegade cop killing the bad guy will reform the world, and in todays world, that just seems like a profoundly stupid message.

Best Scene: Fight at the Museum

Demolition Man boasts several ass kicking confrontations between Spartan and Phoenix. The opening Escape from L.A. backdrop that establishes these deadly foes, and the fall out that an interaction between the two can have is considered extreme even when the world is seemingly at the brink of collapse. It really sets a high stake for our squeaky clean future. The final battle in the Cryo-lab is also iconic and features a pretty excellent practical effect. However, I'd have to give the best scene to the fight at the weapons exhibit. The fact that Spartan knows his enemy so well is on display as he predicts that the Weapons exhibit will be an irresistible draw, we get to see Phoenix at his chaotic best, great one liners, and it's just a toy box for both Hero and Villain to let lose and deliver on that fall out I was just mentioning had been set up in the first act. While I loved the comedic take on this rivalry, I'd like to see Snipes and Stallone take up their beef again in a more seriously violent film. They make for great arch-rivals.

Best Gag: Potty Mouth

When I was a kid I remember my father hauling ass down our residential road and getting pulled over just a block away from our driveway. I think he was doing 55 in a 35. It was his fault but as the proud small government southern man he was, he felt it was absolutely overreach on behalf of the police department to give him a ticket on the road that he lived on. Stupid, I know. But our car was full of groceries and the officer let our ice cream melt while the whole time we sat in the truck with our home in view. My father was so enraged about this ticket that he got revenge on the mean old government by writing the check to pay his ticket, and then using said check to wipe sweat from his ass crack after mowing the lawn the next day. He mailed it in and I as an 11 year old knew that it was not going to effect the offending officer in the least, but that some poor old county clerk was going to probably get pink eye. Anyway, if you handle money or checks, you should always wear gloves, or wash your hands regularly before touching your face or eating. All that to say, I really enjoyed that after being frustrated with the 3 shell system Stallone racks up a series of fines for profanity. These fines are issued via an automated ticket dispenser on the wall in the police department. Stallone lets out a string of hilarious expletives that I hope to God were adlibbed, before he is satisfied with a nice pile of paper in his hand. He implies that he is going to the bathroom to do a little paperwork, and the scene is over. Even if you don't want to watch the whole movie, go ahead and YouTube this scene. Stallone has a surprising talent for comedy on display here.

Summary

To Begin with, I would say not to take this film too seriously: It is a comedy, after all, and I am not certain that the political implications of the movie were meant to be thought out as much as I have above. Unlike Judge Dredd, which Stallone would star in 2 years after this, (tragically deciding to bring Rob Schneider along with him) Demolition Man does not openly advocate for fascism. It's funny, it's a tight story with a satisfying conclusion, it's got great action choreography and it may be Snipes, Bullock and Stallone at their absolute best.

Overall Grade: B