#but did anyone feel the kind of underlying thing of ‘hey we’re just being silly’ on top of the ��we know you know’ thing

[niamhthefae]

i feel physically unwell what the fuck daniel and philip

[recklessrex]

Jellicle-ho did this and now I also want to rank my favorite Cats. So I wrote this instead of writing about Sullivan.

Long Post Warning

To start with I don't hate/dislike any of them. The ones toward the bottom of the list tend to be ones I just think about less often, or don't feel like I connect to as well. Based on 1998 for simplicity's sake.

1) Munkustrap

My baby. Munk's always been my favorite from the very start. It's not just the hero thing, it's not just that Michael Gruber's a handsome mf, it's how he interacts with the others. He's so loving and protective, but at the same time so done with everyone's bullshit (when bullshittery occurs). And then there's the underlying anxiety issues we're all pretty sure he deals with that makes me just want to hug him. He just so clearly wants everyone to be happy and safe. It melts my heart how much joy he gets from seeing his tribe happy. Watch when Deuteronomy shows up in 1998, after he greets him himself (before which he steps aside so others can greet him first cuz he's a sweetheart), he spends most of the walk to the stairs soaking in how happy all the others are and being utterly overjoyed. Add to that his deep, devoted love for his father and how diligently he looks after him, his clear affection for his little brother Tugger despite being more done with his bullshit than anyone else's (Tugger don't touch the bagpip. Tugger no), his strong, tender bond with Alonzo and how smoothly they work together in a crisis, and his sometimes subtle, sometimes not-so-subtle crush on Demeter (notice that she's the only one other than Alonzo that HE approaches right before the Gumbie Cat and the only one he uses both hands to reach out to during that). Also his snark and sass, when he lets it out, is an utter joy. And I love the way he can assert his dominance with just a glance if the situation calls for it (watch him with Cassandra in Grizabella's first scene), but still rarely ever pulls rank like that. Overall he's a really fun character to watch for me, as well as to think about and (if I get around to it) write about.

2) Demeter

My other baby. (I'm so happy my two babies love each other). She's such a complex character. Her backstory of abuse and her current dealings with PTSD as a result are only the jumping off point. I love her moments of bravery, like jumping on Mac to protect the tribe despite everything she's been through. Courage isn't about not being afraid, it's about doing what needs to be done despite your fears. She's the most courageous member of the tribe and I love her so much. As for her relationships with the others, she has a much less subtle crush on Munk than he does on her, but she's so shy about it (and he's so damn polite) I doubt they'd ever get off the ground without a little help. She's so adorable in the way she looks at him, in 1998 she has a particular smile different from her other smiles that seems to be just for him. I also love her connection with Bomba, I feel like if she and Munk ever got off the ground it would be with Bomba's encouragement. Bomba is always there to hold her up when she feels small. While Munk makes her feel safe, Bomba makes her feel strong. So this is why Demelustrap is my OT3 thank you for coming to my TED talk.

3) Mungojerrie

Acts like a dumbass, is actually a genius. (Fight me). I love characters like this. Contradictions. Like brave strong Munk who is actually more emotionally vulnerable than he lets on, or nervous timid Demeter who bravely confronted the person she fears most. Mungo seems fundamentally clueless in most situations but I think he's just a carefree goofball, at least when the stakes are low. He and Teazer are both clever enough to get away with all sorts of mischief, and I don't think it's a "Teazer is the smart one" situation. I mean Teazer is probably smarter, but they need smarts on both sides. I also love how smoothly they work together as a team. Mungo ranks higher for those adorable "clueless" moments and for being a lovable goof.

4) Rumpleteazer

Acts like a bimbo, is actually a genius. To a lesser extent than Mungo in that she acts way less clueless than he does, and her antics are usually more obviously silliness rather than dumbassery. Would be higher but I just like Mungo's goofy aesthetic a bit more. I'd also like to take this time to note I do NOT think they are siblings. (Fight me. Again)

5) Mistoffolees

Another of those contradictions I love. He's simultaneously shy and showy, bold and insecure. He doesn't quite know who he is yet, but he knows who he wants to be. He's also adorable to watch, with his little hops and poses. His relationship with Tugger is adorable, whether you see them as mates or BFFs (both? both. both is good), and his obvious crush on Victoria is equally adorable (more NOT siblings!). The way he melts when she smiles at him toward the beginning of 1998 *sigh* so cute

6) Alonzo

Sorry @jellicle-ho I do love him lots, but he doesn't make the top five simply because I feel closer to Misto and the Chaos Twins (just an expression, not siblings!) on a spiritual level. He's still one of the best characters. He has his "contradiction" element of being cocky but somewhat insecure, and I especially love that he's just as serious as he is playful. He's also a slinky, sassy bastard and a blast to watch on stage.

7) Victoria

Woo boy. Okay first of all, since it seems to be a major factor, the contradiction element. She seems like a shy, reserved, almost demure young lady at first, but she's actually that quietly sassy serene girl at the Alpha bitch's lunch table, the one that's actually nice and doesn't participate in putting down the weird kid no one likes. But she's still gonna judge you. I love every moment of Victoria-sideeye in the 1998 video. And of course there's her whole side plot which basically revolves around her being extremely DTF, which is quite the opposite of "demure." Also her obvious crush on Misto is also adorable, the way she smiles at him, ugh like the only reason she danced with Plato instead is because Misto was too shy to approach her (also Plato has much better upper body strength so hey ho, hey hue, let's go Pas de Deux). She's also so very graceful and elegent and then there's her "omg why!?" flexibility which make her fascinating to watch.

8) Pouncival

Precious child. Precious little jackass brat. No but really I love him so much he's such a brat but also like he's tiny? And he wants to be cool sooo bad! The way he runs in for his "and bright!" all excited, I just can't. He has this sort of quiet, but enthusiastic demeaner of someone that knows he's not the star, but hopes to be, and he's bursting with energy in a pseudo-controlled way that I find more compelling than Etcetera's brand of enthusiasm. I love his acrobatics, whether they're super smooth, adorably clumsy, or straight up pratfalls. I love how 14-years-old he is. You can see him getting bored in that teenage "okay grampa you've told this story forty times already" kind of way during part of Gus's song. I love how adorably menacing he looks during the Naming of Cats. I just love the baby. He is very baby.

9) Bombalurina

She's beauty. She's grace. She'll smack you in the face. She's sexy and she knows it. She's such a confident, strong woman, and while she's the most overtly sexualized character, I kind of find it's even more empowering, you know? Like the idea that a woman can be both sexy and strong, she doesn't have to pick one. Bomba is walking proof that being strong, bold, and tough is not inherently "masculine," nor is protecting others. Don't get me wrong, I love strong female characters of all varieties, I'm not here to knock the tomboy trope, but when a strong female character is also sexually liberated it's just a different level of empowerment. Not just the deconstruction of "masculine/feminine" lines, but also in the "my body, my life, my choice" kind of way. Further, I absolutely love her relationship with Demeter. I personally support the mates, bffs, and siblings hcs because they honestly work so well as any of these (but as mentioned above, Demelustrap is my OT3, despite not always getting strong Bombastrap vibes). Her protectiveness and desire to comfort Demeter is so beautiful. Maybe it's the contradiction thing that I love so much. Strong, bold Bomba has her most tender moments when looking after Demeter. Idk. Moving on!

10) Rum Tum Tugger

He's beauty. He's… grace? He probably won't smack you in the face. He's sexy and he SO knows it. Tugger is walking proof that certain stereotyped "feminine" traits aren't inherently feminine, or to put it another way, he breaks down what it means to be "masculine." Think about it. Cares about his looks, beautiful luxurious long hair, wiggles his hips, wiggles his hips more, wiggles his hips when he walks, struts like a model on a runway, shakes his chest to be sexy, idolizes a cute boy, fashionable clothes (knee-bandana ftw!), all stereotypical "girly" traits, but would anyone describe Tugger as "girly"? Anyway, that's not even what I love most about him. I actually used to dislike him as a kid, but these days I can't get enough of him. Most of the time he just oozes positive vibes in one way or another, be it party vibes or laid back vibes. Most of his screentime in 1998 is such a good time because of that. He has such an energy and ferocity to him during his dance numbers, especially the second half of the Jellicle Ball in 1998. And then there's his quiet moments, especially the affection he shares with Munk while singing about their dad (omg the respect and affection he feels for both of them, coming from such a self-loving bastard it just ahhhhhh), and then after Deuteronomy comes back I just can't he's so sweet omg. Not to mention his whole relationship with Misto. Aside from the whole idolizing thing, which is adorable, he also is so supportive and encouraging. He just naturally bleeds confidence and good vibes, but he deliberately offers that confidence to Misto when he needs it. It's so beautiful and I'm gonna cry. I used to ship him with Bomba, but these days I hc them as friends with occasional benefits that like to place bets on how far interactions between Munk and Deme will go before one of them chickens out or gets awkward, and on which one will be the awkward chicken this time.

Wow I talked a lot about Tugger and he's only #10. Okay well, you folks ready to get controversial?

11) Macavity

I know I know, hear me out. I know most people interpret him as a total bastard with no redeeming qualities but like, I don't read him that way? Anyway I have complicated feelings about Mac but I'll get more into it in another post. As a character in the show I do really like him as a villain, I love his laugh, I love his "no look guys it's okay I brought him back see he's over there heheheh" gesture before he shows up in disguise, I love how show-boaty and "totally hyped for this" he is when he reveals himself, I love his "no wait please don't hurt me it's cool I'm leaving" gesture at Alonzo after the Jellicles start ganging up on him, he's just a blast of a character really, whether he's redemable or not.

12) Old Deuteronomy

Sweetest man you'll ever know. His compassion for the entire tribe is so sweet it hurts. He even feels love and understanding for Griz, and (futiley) tries to persuade the others to accept her, even subtley scolding them after the first "Memory" with his "Moments of Happiness." He loves his sons especially, and I adore every moment he interacts with either of them. He also can bring the sass, see his 'chin up' posture before Tugger bows to him, which I always read as them playfully teasing each other, or his little eye-roll when Munk gets a bit extra talking about the fire brigade. On that note, how into Munk's little play he is, even though it's going wrong. He keeps making encouraging gestures at Munk and reacting with surprise at the right moments (when Munk is looking at least lol). Anyway he's great moving on.

13) Jennyanydots

Jenny is that cool aunt that hangs out and has fun but also won't put up with your nonsense. She's so great I love her so much. She's honestly just a blast all the time I love her so much what can I say? I hc her as teaching Tumblebrutus how to sew. I don't know why.

14) Electra

Ah the "quiet" kitten. I read her as the tough tomboyish one of the girl kittens, and I hc her as sort of in training as a protector, and that's why she's more serious than the others. In 1998 she seems to look up to Munk, being the first to greet him before Gumbie Cat, and nuzzling him during Old Deuteronomy. 1998 Electra also has a lot of little adorable motions like licking her paws during Old Deuteronomy and retrieving the Peke paw from the middle of stage and than posing/playing with it during the Pekes and the Pollicles. I also love her freckles and her pink arm warmer. Massively underrated character.

15) Tumblebrutus

SPINNY. BALLET. BOI. Nuff said. But I'm gonna say more. He keeps up with Misto in ballet and exceeds Pounce in acrobatics, and as such is fascinating to watch. Also Brutus's struggle between his playful instincts and his desire to impress his elders is so adorable.

16) Admetus/George

First of all I first knew him as Admetus long long ago, and he will always be Admetus to me. Sorry. Second, omg this lovely, happy, wonderfully expressive boi. His face at literally any point in 1998 is such a gem.

17) Jemima

Speaking of great expressions, how bout Jemima? She's so cute and sweet! I love her whole deal of understanding Griz's pain and trying to get the rest of the tribe to understand. The only reason she's not higher up is because I somehow don't emotionally connect with her like I do some of the other kittens.

18) Coricopat

The more laid-back and playful half of the mystic twins. The twins in general are cool af, but Corico ranks higher for being more relatable.

19) Skimbleshanks

BUBBLY. TRAIN. DAD. Nuff said. Buttttt I'm gonna say more! Skimble is your best friend's dad that is always chaperoning on field trips but that's okay because he's actually pretty fun to be around most of the time. I love his cheerful expressions and his little jigs. His song is so much fun. And I love the relationship between him and Spara in 1998. More on that below

20) Asparagus

Okay so Spara is your other best friend's dad (or your best friend's other dad) who sometimes tries too hard to be cool and connect with the kids but that's okay because he's so nice and besides it's kind of adorable? What I find most adorable about Spara though is how hard he's crushing on Skimble. Like even if you hc them as already in a relationship, he really just can't get enough of Train Dad. Look at how Spara smiles at Skimble ALL THE DAMN TIME. He's practically blushing at multiple points during Skimble's song. And Skimble tends to gravitate towards Spara quite a bit, and omg that big grin he gives him during the line "sleeping car exprrrrreeesss!" I'm dead. In conclusion I need more Asparashanks content thank you for coming to my TED talk

21) Cassandra

I WANT to like Cassandra better than I do. I really really want to. But I feel like she's just so hard to get to know. I do enjoy her on stage, but as a character with backstory and motives she's a bit hard to work with. That being said she's by no means a flat character. I do hc her as one of the deputy protectors along with Alonzo, and more recently as part of the BFF power trio of her, Alonzo, and Munk, since Alonzo and much more subtley Munk are the only ones she shows any physical affection toward, aside from occasionally hanging out with T-brutus but we'll shelve that for now. I do really enjoy watching her though, she has some really interesting movements and expressions. And she does radiate a sort of "try me, I fucking dare you" vibe that I love a lot.

22) Tantomile

I have the same problem with Tanto that I do with Cass. I just don't feel like I know her very well. She is cool as a mystical psychic character, but that's part of what makes the twins in general cool. So far I haven't been able to connect to her as an individual without her brother, otherwise she would be much higher on this list. She's still cool though.

22) Plato

*Deep breath* okay. I don't dislike Plato. I just.. okay look out of the male kittens/young adults, he's my least favorite. He does have qualities that I really like, like how he's a shy reserved boy on the outside and a fiery passionate soul on the inside. That's cool. Also those intense expressions are pretty cool I guess. I guess I might have less positive feelings about him because everyone assumes Victoria's magically in love now because of the Pas de Deux even though they barely interact otherwise. Which is unfair of me to feel that way. I hc him as struggling with internalized anger and anxiety and having difficulty expressing himself.

23) Etcetera

I'll be honest, I used to find her annoying. This one's pretty much entirely on me, because she has a superficially similar demeanor to a girl that used to bully me in school. But since graduating Cety's grown on me a lot, not in small part due to her wonderful enthusiasm for literally everything. While less compelling to me than Pounce's quieter, more controlled flavor of energetic enthusiasm, her bouncy jubilance still makes me grin and giggle along with her, so that's a major plus.

24) Jellylorum

Jelly is your other cool aunt that worries too much about your safety but also has cool stories to tell and is always doing like art and stuff in her garage. I hc her as the tribe nurse. Would be higher if not for slight Karen-ness.

25) Gus

Only on stage for a short time but he shines. The way he starts out all helpless looking like he doesn't even know where he is and slowly blossoms into singing about his old days with enthusiasm, and then breaking down into tears. He's a great character for the scene that he's in, but unfortunately there's not a lot else to him, so he gets a low spot on the list

26) Grizabella

Oof. Okay so. I get it. She messed up. My hc is… well, complicated, but short version is she never planned on being a mom and has no idea how to be a mom, and so she just let Deut raise Munk and visited occasionally (ahem rarely), but she does end up later spending some time as his primary caregiver, and she fucks up royally, like massive neglect and mild emotional manipulation, and ends up emotionally damaging Munk more than if she'd left him alone. SO with this hc in mind, is she redemable? Idk. But the tribe forgave her so that's what matters. Do I feel sorry for her? Yes. Do I believe she honestly regrets her past actions? …kind of? Yes. Let's go with yes. Does any of this make her my favorite character? Not by a long shot. I have mixed feelings about Grizabella. I don't dislike her I just… don't know how to feel about her.

27) Bustopher Jones

Walking fat joke, but a pleasant walking fat joke. Wish we could have got to know him better than "that cultured fat guy all the toms want to impress." He's fun though. I love his expressions throughout his song, and that toodle-pip! is so adorable.

28) Exotica

Oh Exotica. Who even are you. We don't know you at all. I do like the moment in Old D's song when she's reaching from the outside of the crowd hoping to get to touch him, and he reaches out so she can, and immediately after touching him she drops her hand and backs away, which I read as shy fangirl overload flee the scene omg he touched me omgomgomg. So that was cute. Ummm. I wish she'd stop changing colors every three seconds so I could keep track of her. Other than that, I don't dislike her, I just don't know her well enough to like her.

Omg I made it to the end. Did I forget anybody? I don't think so... Phew, that was so hard! Thanks for reading if you made it this far! :)

[iwillgiveyoumyhappiness]

전웅, Jeon Woong

anonymous asked:

I suddenly had an idea where you text your number neighbour and it turns into a sweet and hella flirty text flirtationship and one day you two decide to meet up for real and they are the cutest person you have ever seen?? It sounds cute to me aaah -1102 :)

Group: AB6IX

Member: Woong

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She would hate to admit her dissatisfaction with life to anyone, but at the same time, she wanted to rant and scream about it. 

It wasn’t that she hated life itself, nowhere near being depressed and filled to the brim with self-loathing, it was just that sometimes living as an adult was the hardest thing to accomplish. Between bills, rent, deadlines and all of the above, it often weighed on her mind. 

In summary: she was being crushed by a mountain of things to do and she had no escape or outlet for her frustrations. She was drowning in the common grind and it was draining her. The dark circles under her eyes were proof enough of that. 

That’s why when she saw a sign hanging out of her across-the-hall neighbor’s door that said: “I’m bored, single and lonely—text if you are, too” with a big smiley face and a phone number, she was of half a mind to actually accept the offer. 

She stared at the sign for a moment, contemplating. She tilted her head from side to side, almost as if searching for any trickery that could’ve been hidden there. 

Nothing. Just a piece of cardboard stuck onto the door with blindingly fluorescent duct tape. Maybe the handwriting was a little messy, but other than that, she didn’t see any reason to be suspicious. 

With a shrug, she pulled her phone out of her pocket, taking a quick picture of the sign. She’d forget the number if she didn’t have some sort of memory of it now, she knew that much. 

She wouldn’t call right away. She wasn’t that desperate for something outside of the norm that she’d text him that quickly. At least... She didn’t think so. 

Though, it came to her attention that she could’ve been wrong when she realized that after cooking up dinner for herself, the first thing she did was open up a text conversation with her mystery neighbor’s number. 

She’d never met her neighbor before, if she was being honest. Which—in this situation—she considered a good thing. He’d moved in just recently and she’d only caught brief glimpses of him when they both left for work in the mornings.

They didn’t even end up leaving the building together. He always took the stairs, but she opted for the elevator since she was a self-proclaimed zombie when she first woke up. 

Accepting her fate, she huffed out an, “I’m insane” before typing out what she hoped would be a good opener.

Hey.

Sure, it wasn’t the most interesting thing to say, but it was always a reliable ice-breaker, in her opinion. She waited for a moment before three familiar dots started hopping about near the bottom left-hand corner of the screen. 

Sorry, who’s this? 

That was to be expected, but still, it made her roll her eyes a little. 

Haha! XD Sorry about that. I’m your neighbor from apartment 24.

Oh, hi! How’d you get my number? 

She furrowed her brows. She went into her picture gallery, tapping the picture she’d taken of the sign outside his door. She sent it with that caption: “This is how”. 

About a minute passed before be replied back with:

Oh my God. 

My friends came over last night super drunk, so I bet that was them. That has ‘Kim Donghyun’ written all over it.

Her eyes widened. 

Oh, she typed back. Well, this is awkward. 

A little bit, yeah. 

She could feel her cheeks heating up with embarrassment. 

I guess I’ll just go then. 

She honestly didn’t expect a reply back at all, but the one she received back shocked her even more than anything she could’ve thought up. 

Wait a moment. Shouldn’t I be the one to decide that? I mean, you texted me first, after all. 

Her interest was piqued. 

And how are you going to decide that, sir? 

Send me a selfie. That’ll help me decide. 

The thought ran through her head to mess with him a little. 

Oh? Are you a very shallow person, then? she asked. 

The answer was fast, no break in between. It was a rapid-fire conversation, in a way, all initial awkwardness having melted away. 

Why do you think so?

It seems to me like your trying to decide my worth by how pretty I am. 

Who says you’re pretty?

Who says I’m not? 

Their playful banter went on for about two more hours before they realized that they were getting nowhere. And that it was almost midnight. 

Huh. Well, I haven’t succeeded in getting a picture of you.

And I haven’t gotten one of you, she replied. So, we’re both a little stuck, aren’t we?

Guess we’ll just have to continue this conversation at a later date, then. 

Guess we will. 

Oh, by the way! You should take the sign off your door. 

Why? You don’t want me talking to anyone else? 

She chuckled at the bold response, nibbling her bottom lip in concentration while she tried to think of an answer. She kept wavering between something a little coy and something equally as forward. They both had their drawbacks. 

What if I don’t want you to? What’re you going to do about it?

There was too long of a pause between messages. She groaned to herself, “I knew I shouldn’t have chosen the gusty one.” Just as the words left her mouth and she was about to toss her phone on the other side of the couch, her notification bell dinged. 

She stared at her phone with a mixture of surprise and hesitance. 

Guess I better go take that sign off, then. Hate to disappoint a pretty neighbor.

How do you know I’m pretty?

How do I know you’re not?

Maybe her answer wasn’t so bad after all. 

That’s how they remained for weeks on end. Despite living directly across from each other, neither of them had taken the jump off of the proverbial cliff to visit each other. 

She knew it would be easy to do so—stand up off the couch, walk a few feet across the hallway and knock on the door—simple as that. But there was something holding her back; an undeniable force. 

Sometimes, she even made the stretch to run back into her apartment if she saw him coming. Probably making herself look like a complete fool to any witnesses, but she felt it was worth it. It was as if she liked him so much that the very thought of him terrified her. 

It was a strange, twisted feeling that she could quite place. 

He made her chest tighten and her stomach do way too many uncomfortable back-flips, and she didn’t even really know what he looked like. Blurry glances and uncomfortable side-long looks from out of her peripherals didn’t give her a very good make on his features. 

But for whatever reason... That had absolutely no baring on the way she felt. 

She didn’t even really know what she was feeling. Just weird.  

She supposed a big reason she was scared about meeting him in person—despite him having suggested it a couple of times—is that she was afraid that he wouldn’t like her as much in person. 

They could be all fun and flirty with each other over the phone, but she knew she would buckle the second she came face-to-face with him. She was worried she would disappoint him if they met. 

She could be cool and collected for a distance, but if she met him, what if she wasn’t as pretty as he expected? What if she wasn’t as charming as she was over text? What if, what if, what if. It was a frustrating cycle. 

And underneath it all, there was an underlying fear that she would be disappointed by him as well. What if he was this fun, slightly awkward, likable person over the phone, but in reality, he turned out to be a massive asshole?

She was worried about not living up to expectations, but she was also worried about being let down, silly as it was.

She flopped down on her bed, exhausted after a day that she thought was too long. Getting reprimanded always took a lot out of her, especially when she wasn’t even clear on what she did wrong. Sad as it was, she’d gotten used to the verbal abuse to the point that she was almost numb to it. 

A familiar brrrring made her head pop up from her mountain of pillows. 

She glanced at the clock. Almost 10 at night. She walked to the front door, leaning toward the peep-hole. She couldn’t make anyone out. 

“Hello?” she called through the wood. “Is anyone there?” Her phone buzzed in her pocket. She pulled it out, reading the familiar contact name of: ‘Neighbor Boy’. She knew his name—a pretty one, Jeon Woong—but she still refused to change his contact info. 

He would always be Neighbor Boy to her. 

She unlocked her phone and read the message in her head. It was stupid, but she’d always played around with different tones of voices in her thoughts. What does he really sound like? she wondered.

Hey, there’s someone at your door?? I don’t recognize him, but he looks like  a delivery man. 

She furrowed her brows. 

A delivery man this late? Still, with a shrug she shot back a quick, “Thanks, hot-stuff”—a nickname she’d given him that she would only ever use over the phone; if she said it out loud, she’d explode with embarrassment—and opened the door.

What she expected was a package to be laid at her feet. What she got instead was a bouquet of vibrant irises shoved in her face, obscuring her view of whomever was on the other end of it.

She raised her hand and pushing the bouquet out of her nose, sneezing right after. She tried to shoot the mystery-florist a look, but they’d covered their face. 

She cleared her throat. “Excuse me?” she said. 

The person—a man, she assumed by the physique—stayed quiet, his face hidden behind the fragrant purple petals. Slowly, he pulled the arrangement down, revealing his face inch-by-inch.

He had pale, clear skin, the softest, floppiest-looking hair, a sharp jaw-line, a nose that rounded out cutely at the tip, naturally pouty lips and soft, kind eyes that were painted with the most beautiful shade of milk chocolate. His ears were stained with a bright, embarrassed red. 

Her eyes widened. Without any words being exchanged, she knew. She just knew who this person in front of her was. 

“Hot-stuff?” she breathed out, the nickname unintentionally slipping out. She tried the play it cool, but it was hard when her neighbor turned out to be literally the most attractive person to breathe air. 

At least... To her, he was. 

He gave a shy smile. “Hi, Gorgeous,” he chuckled adorably, returning the nickname. His tone was even better than she’d imagined. Not too deep, not to high. Slightly velvety, she’d say. A solid baritone. 

He rubbed the back of his neck, gulping visibly. It was hard to believe that this cutie in front of her was the same forward and confident tease she’d been chatting with for a few weeks now.

He cleared his throat. “I know this is kinda sudden,” he started off, “but I just really wanted to meet up with you, and well...” He held the flowers out to her, avoiding eye contact. “We were both taking too long.” 

Her eyes widened a little. “Oh,” she stuttered dumbly. “Oh.” The realization finally dawned on her to take the bouquet he was so delicately offering to her. “Irises,” she said, taking them into her arms and giving them a quick sniff. 

“They’re very pretty,” she told him, nibbling her bottom lip. She was never the one who received flowers. Usually, she’d be the one giving them out. It felt nice to be doted on, for once. “Thank you.”

He nodded, trying to keep his smile at a minimum. It wasn’t working. “No problem,” he said, shifting his weight from the balls of his feet to his heels periodically, giving off the vibe of a child waiting at the bus-stop. “I just... I thought you deserved something cooler than roses,” he admitted. Another precious chuckle. “So I Googled the meaning of different flowers.” 

She couldn’t help but laugh at that, successfully breaking through any tension that they might’ve had. “Oh, yeah?” she asked. “And what did doctor Google say about Irises?” 

“Hope,” he said, putting his hands in his pockets.

She quirked a brow. “Hope, huh? Hope for what?” 

He took a deep breath, seemingly trying to gain a little courage. “Hope that you’ll agree to become my friend. And hope that if you like me enough as a friend, you’ll want to date me.” 

Her jaw dropped.

He gestured to the bouquet. “That’s why I got those flowers,” he said. He gave her a heart-melting smile. “I was hoping to brainwash you into liking the me outside the screen.” 

She looked down at her feet, a small smile playing on her lips. “Can I tell you a secret?” she asked softly. He nodded. 

She leaned forward with her hand cupped around her mouth, like she was going to reveal a grand truth or tell an old tale. He leaned in too, turned his head so that his ear was angled toward her; he didn’t want to miss a word, already stuck on her voice.

“I already do,” she said simply. “I like the fact that he’s just as awkward and nervous as I am in real life. I like the fact that he’s trying to woo me. I like the fact that he Googles things he doesn’t understand fully, ‘cause bro, me too. I like the fact that he makes me laugh and I like the fact that he’s convenient.”

He pulled away with furrowed brows. “Convenient?” he echoed.

She nodded, a grin on her face. “For sure!” she said. “If I end up liking the real you enough to date you, I’ll only have to go across the hall for date-night.” She shrugged. “Doesn’t get much more convenient than that.” 

His cheeks heated up a little bit. “Well, then...” he said. “I guess I’ll just have to try really hard to get you to like the real me enough. It’d be a shame to pass up such a golden opportunity.” 

.

.

.

Maybe I love him. Just maybe. 

Hey, 1102! I hope things are going well for you and that work’s not killing you too much. Keep fighting and being your cool-self and it’ll all work out! 

This is a pretty late posting, but thank you so much for this request. It was literally the cutest and I loved writing it. I, too, have been swamped as of late, so I haven’t had as much time for writing recently. :’) Lord, give me strength.

Have a good day/evening/night!

[ailuronymy]

Hey, I follow a WC YouTuber called Moonkitti and she'd uploaded a video called "Warrior Names". She kinda slams traditionalism and also demonstrates she has no idea what exactly it is. Like she shows some prefixes as examples which has Tree and Dirt as acceptable and Jay isn't, despite the inverse being true. I know she mentions she's not against it in concept, but that it was being enforced to limit others' creativity, but I have really mixed feelings about it and wanted to know your opinions.

Hello there, Ruddles! I hadn’t heard of this person before but I went and watched this video and I think I understand where your mixed feelings might be coming from. This video is trying to do a lot of things but, in my personal opinion, it’s doing none of them particularly well.

There’s three major things happening all at once: 1. a legitimate personal reflection about how certain traditionalists acted towards this person in the past and how that impacted her (4:50; 6:20); 2. an incorrect and misleading explanation of what traditionalism even is and very clearly no understanding of why it appeals to people, and therefore very little empathy towards people who use the style; (5:13; 6:00);  and 3. (from an outsider stance as someone who likes deconstructing arguments for fun) a fascinatingly messy argument both in favour of Erin Hunter while using Erin Hunter’s various (and typically more incompetent) choices as justifications for… everything and anything. 

It’s a mixed bag to be sure! To start with, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with saying that some people who use the traditional style are jerks. It’s very true. I remember those days too. Some people genuinely did crash forum threads just to mock and belittle other people. It was terrible and I think it’s totally legitimate to be upset about that.

I think the argument that everyone who uses traditionalism behaves that way is bad faith, however, and I also question the confirmation bias happening at 6:54, because I only ever see people talking about traditionalism for themselves, because that’s the spaces I hang out in. I wonder if Moonkitti has ever actually looked for traditional forums and sites, or if she’s just taken for granted that they don’t exist and everyone who uses the style is waging their own personal crusade. That’s not something I endorse in any way, by the way. Don’t anyone do that. 

The second topic is personally the most frustrating because at points she’s almost right. But her definitions are incorrect and explanations simplify in a way that isn’t helpful to anyone. She’s not trying to actually give an account of the style and then point out the ways it doesn’t work or shouldn’t exist or anything like that: she’s half understood the idea and gone, “That sounds dumb.” This is in fact what she claims traditionalists say about other styles (7:22), which I disagree with: traditionalism is based mostly on having a set framework in place and then fairly rigorously debating what works and doesn’t within that world set-up. Plenty of names that are traditional sound pretty silly, but that doesn’t mean we knock them back wholesale. The whole point of the style is there is a method. Making judgments based on looser qualities, like sound or flow or imagery, is more of a lyrical approach.

Anyway, she doesn’t even seem to have gone to the effort of learning about it herself before deciding to preach. I think that’s tacky. It’s exasperating to me, because it’s not like there aren’t a ton of resources out there: if nothing else, traditionalists are good like that! We love lists and archives and referring to rules we’ve written out. That’s one of the things she’s correct about. She frequently refers to the fact that traditionalism is fan-made (2:25; 3:59; 6:45), but she does so as if this is a bad thing, which it’s not. Traditionalists are aware it’s fan-made: we are, after all, the fans who made it. That’s the whole idea. 

Which brings me to the third topic: she doesn’t seem to fully understand why traditionalism exists and why it brings joy to people who use it. That’s an issue, because much of her argument is based around “well, canon.” She mischaracterises traditionalists as people who are “taking things too seriously” for being creative–i.e., she recognises that the entirety of traditionalism is fan-made, but can’t seem to understand why fans would elect to create rules to follow; it seems to cancel out the creativity in her world-view. She also repeatedly refers to the fact that she doesn’t need a traditional system to enjoy the Warriors world (0:26; 7:17; 8:28; 9:05)–to which I reply, your mileage may vary–and seems to look down on people who are pulled out of the story by “a silly name,” unlike her or Erin Hunter, who don’t take things “seriously.”

The major problem I have with this approach is that it shows a fundamental misunderstanding of the value of good world-building–or even some idea of what it looks like. She claims a strict system would result in a boring story (which perhaps would be true for her, who knows: again, mileage may vary) (8:28), but the issue I have is that she says: “don’t get me wrong, warrior cats is not perfect, but the least of our troubles with the quality of these books is how strange these names are. Sure, Bouncefire sounds weird and doesn’t seem realistic, but if you’re worried about this story’s realism, consider the fact that we have about fifty cats who live together who barely gossip except if it’s about a housecat” (1:06). 

She uses the word “realistic” throughout the whole video, as though the goal of using a traditional style is to make Warriors realistic, which in my opinion it’s not. Plausible, yes. Believable, yes. Cohesive, yes. But not realistic. These are, after all, talking cats with religion. I myself multiple times a year refer to the fact we’re all getting excited over “feral cats talking to stars in the forest.” There’s no pretense there! But the thing Moonkitti argues that actually makes me mad is that, because it’s not real, nothing matters. 

And that’s absolutely horse-apples. It matters that the names in canon don’t have structure, because the world of Warriors doesn’t have structure and that is the underlying problem of the series. That is part of why the series is not well-written. The world doesn’t have structure or consistency in how it is built, and the run-on effect is that characters are frequently flat and their decisions–even their deaths–are regularly made meaningless by the world of the story. The world-building is inconsistent and poorly planned, and the run-on effect is that plots regularly force characters who are supposed to be intelligent or even an average amount of smart into being unbelievably stupid simply for the sake of furthering it, and the stakes of the stories are constantly forced to increase to squeeze any amount of impact out of the plots because the writing itself won’t do it. 

There is no hierarchy from most to least when it comes to the quality troubles of Erin Hunter’s work. The issues in Warriors are not stand-alone. They are interconnected. It’s silly to pretend that transformative world-building, which is what traditionalism is, is somehow a superficial, ornamental thing and not simply another way for fans to mend some of what makes Warriors “not perfect,” like any other AU or fandom meta. Canon invented the name-change custom (7:43)–and repeatedly made it messy, and shameful, and had no idea what they wanted to go with. Traditionalism mended that and made it better. If you can recognise that the series isn’t perfect, I don’t think it’s a stretch to also recognise and acknowledge different ways of how fans react to and deal with those imperfections in fan-works, such as role-playing and fanfiction and OCs. 

Moonkitti’s repetitions that this is a fantasy series and it’s not real so stop caring frankly reminds me a lot people who get uncomfortable and defensive when you analyse and discuss a piece of media in any kind of critical or thoughtful way and will tell you don’t be so serious. In my case, these people tend not to realise that, for me at least, this is fun--and it’s worthwhile and important to do. It’s also my actual job, in the daylight hours. (Here it’s just a hobby).

So tl;dr: Erin Hunter doesn’t take Warriors seriously–and that is the problem. The canon naming style is a symptom of how little effort Erin Hunter puts into consistent or meaningful world-building. Traditionalism exists as some fans’ attempt to craft a solution for themselves, and I include myself in that. 

Moonkitti’s approach to explaining traditionalism from a place of 1. not being interested in understanding it and 2. being oddly defensive of Erin Hunter, the creative team behind all of canon’s terrible weird writing choices, rather than critical of said choices and choosing instead to blame fans for wanting canon to be better and then acting on that desire, feels a bit in bad faith to me. I’m sad to hear that she had such bad experiences with traditionalists in the past, because that’s awful, but I also feel strongly that it’s a good idea to know what you’re talking about before you step onto the stage like this.

For instance, she says, “There’s no real argument for why [certain] names [should] not be in the series,” (2:13), but, well. I’m here and this blog is my seven-years-and-counting argument. I like to think it’s often a persuasive one, too!

[capn-charlie]

A #Kadena One-shot : Identity vs. Personality

Kat and Adena have a heart-to-heart about the meaning of labels, sexuality in general, and a shared past experience of Adena’s that’s all-too-real. 

“I didn’t know you were an artist of various mediums.”

Kat’s cheeky statement gets Adena’s attention from where she’s sat, cross-legged by the girl’s feet with a miniature, nail polish brush held carefully between three of her fingers.

“Look at that… you learn something new every day,” she adds with a mindless twist, eyes raising to look across the room at nothing in particular. “Photography not included, obviously. We already knew you kick ass in that department.”

Things had previously been quiet, consumed by a warm comfort matched by candles scattered throughout the apartment bedroom, creating an undeniable atmosphere as the two bonded via a spur-the-moment, nail-painting session. It was Kat’s idea, coming in the form of a seductive-sounding request that Adena wouldn’t have denied even if her girlfriend had demanded it. Quite frankly, despite nail-painting being an everyday activity done by just about anyone, she enjoys the leisure time between them and how normal they act, like they’re equal-parts best friends and girlfriends. It just makes sense.

“Kat, I’m painting your toenails,” Adena finally answers, smirking and briefly shaking her head while her hand stills. “I hardly believe that makes me a qualified artist.”

“Hey, I just wanna compliment my girlfriend,” her gaze turns pointed, playfully lecturing. “Live a little.”

She pauses, looking up to lock eyes with the girl whose face remains stone-like and clearly not planning to change anytime soon. It causes both to smile eventually, the makeshift seriousness being the bane of their existence as they try to one-up the other with random quips and comebacks. Just another part of everyday life within their joint household. They both swoon over the concept, but neither bring it up.

“Hm, okay,” following another short pause, Adena hums. “I accept and appreciate the compliment, then.”

It’s silly yet completely genuine, each loving how consistently supportive they are ━ even when it comes to little things such as this: nail painting. Being able to remain oneself with a significant other is important, especially when already bold yet tender from a steady, past maturation, but it’s also enjoyable to know that you’ve acquired something more from being a person’s counterpart, like a little victory. You’re able to stand on your own, thrive on your own and grow into a human so beautiful and unique, but then someone else comes along and provides you with a hug of comfort and support that you didn’t know you were missing.

The thought causes Kat’s cheeks to fullen as she smiles, though she tries to stifle it by swallowing hard and clearing her throat. Again, disrupting the silence, Adena glances up as if to ask if she’s okay, but it only gives her girlfriend an opening to ask a question that’s been on her mind for a while now.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Mhm...” an absentminded hum responds, Adena moving the other girl’s foot slightly for a better view of the toe she’s painting.

“At what point did you start…” the matched hand motion is vague, not knowing how to express the question properly as Adena lifts her chin to be fully attentive, “…feeling something for me?”

Her mouth opens at first, then she asks, “What brought this question on?” with a quiet laugh.

“I’ve been thinking about it for a while, actually,” Kat takes a deep breath. “We know I was dealing with some less-than-straight emotions from pretty much the get-go. Thank you for that, by the way,” it’s partially rambled, and Adena offers a smirk.

“My pleasure.”

“My point is… you didn’t have to go through those emotions,” her palms turn upward as if she’s shrugging, eyes drifting around the room because, admittedly, she feels a tad vulnerable ━ no matter if she’s already braved these specific, self-questioning demons, or otherwise.

“Just because I already identified as a lesbian, doesn’t mean I had everything figured out when it came to you,” it’s not upset-sounding nor forceful, but it comes with a frown and, automatically, Kat thinks she’s offended the other girl.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”

“No, no, I’m not trying to be rude,” Adena stops her right away, smiling warmly. “What I’m saying is that it took some time for me too. I had to…” the words don’t flow clearly, so she laughs and slouches as she reaches for the nail polish bottle to screw its cap back on.

When the polish is set aside, Adena’s hands fall into her lap as she stares at Kat, partially licking her lips in thought before bluntly stating, “It’s not easy falling for a straight girl.”

The reasoning makes her girlfriend’s face drop, not in offense but confusion.

“But you must’ve known I wasn’t entirely straight,” she tries to reason with the girl across from her. “Or… whatever I am. Jury’s still out on that,” it comes as a mutter, more so to herself but Adena picks up on the underlying frustration.

“You don’t have to label yourself, Kat. Either temporarily or permanently. It’s a personal choice,” Adena tilts her head to the side, giving her girlfriend a pout in hopes that she comprehends her words and believes them.

“I know, but sometimes it bothers me,” her voice nearly cracks. “Doesn’t it bother you?” Kat narrows her eyes in question, genuinely wondering. “You just said it’s not easy falling for a straight girl. What if that’s my label?”

“Then that’s your choice,” truly, Adena knows that Kat has a good point, and part of her regrets her response from just a minute or so prior, but it’s not so black and white, so she expands on her statement. “Don’t let my words confuse you. It’s not easy, no, but I meant it in regards to how I first judged you.”

“Which was…?”

Adena sighs, bowing her head with a tiny, regretful grin as she knows what she’s about to say will come off as ridiculous considering her most-recent dispute. Nevertheless, she relaxes her shoulders.

“Straight.”

Kat shifts her jaw, “Okay, yeah, even if I wasn’t confused before, now I am. Do you hear this conversation we’re having right now, or is it just me?”

She laughs as Kat’s eyes continue to narrow in a mild amusement, scooting a few inches closer so she’s only a foot away from her girlfriend. Adena waits, gathering her words with her teeth snagging her bottom lip momentarily, eyes drifting to the floor nearby, before putting out a broad explanation:

“Sometimes in communities, people’s identities define their personality. You see some being open-minded and fluid, and, other times… they become critical and judgmental. They think it’s part of the territory, or that leaving themselves open to understanding something else also leaves them unprotected.”

“Huh…” Kat says in thought, still squinting as she tries to understand where this is going.

“I once had a friendship with a girl much like you,” Adena begins, straightening her back as she sits, “but it ended quickly because of her sudden change in judgment. Well, not a change, but I hadn’t known how she truly felt beforehand.”

“What do you mean?”

“We’d often see each other in private, or at night when a little amount of people were around, and it was okay. We enjoyed ourselves and seeing each other. She’d always hug me goodbye, and called me when she got home,” she speaks vibrantly, like she’s retelling an old tale that has little-to-no effect on her anymore, and Kat pays attention, engrossed in the story. “I didn’t realize until after a while that our private friendship wasn’t because she liked lying low, but because she didn’t want her other friends to see.”

“How did you realize?”

“After a lengthy persuasion on my part,” Adena rubs her lips together, “she agreed to go grab a bite to eat at a little cafe. We had a nice time. There was normal talking, joking, even sharing our lunches,” a pause breaks the story, the girl sighing, “but her other friends showed up. A total surprise to both of us, but... she had plans with them that night for a sleepover after a festival a city over, so one of them asked if she’d like a ride home to get her things. I didn’t think anything of it. I was happy to see her enjoying herself with her other friends. But, as she was leaving and I stood up to hug her like usual, she backed away and smiled at me, then left.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Kat waves her hands, like she’s clearing the air of the flashback. “She just left? She didn’t say anything? Did her friends say anything?” it comes with a severe, annoyed frown on her girlfriend’s behalf.

“No one said anything,” she shakes her head. “At least, she didn’t until I asked her in a message, later that night. She explained that she couldn’t hug me in front of her friends, as she didn’t want them to think I was coming onto her since they knew I’m a lesbian. I told her that was absurd, and I asked if she thought I was coming onto her whenever we hugged. She never denied it.”

There’s a pause as the recollection fades, Adena bowing her head; maybe she didn’t forget it as well as she thought she did, or maybe she really hasn’t forgiven the girl who hurt her. Sure, it was only a friendship and nothing further, and she knows not everyone has that mindset, but that kind of instance provides a person with a certain, grim outlook on new friendships. You never know who is bound to turn around and walk away due to something you thought they understood ━ something you thought didn’t matter but, apparently, did.

“You thought I’d react like that?”

Kat’s whispered, cracked inquisition gets Adena to lift her head and break out of her loathing, lips parting because she didn’t mean to make her girlfriend feel bad about anything. Nevertheless, it’s something so real that needs to be addressed, and Adena refuses to stray away from yet another heart-to-heart between them.

“Maybe not exactly like that, but I do know that sexuality can be touchy for people. Not everyone is as open as I am, and that’s okay.”

“It’s not okay when they’re treating you like you’re going to give them some disease by hugging,” Kat condemns the stranger’s actions. “That’s… unbelievable. Can’t two girls be friends without everyone getting lit-up like it’s something new? What century are we in?”

Internally, it makes her second-guess her own friendships, wondering how she’d deal with the aftermath if Jane or Sutton ever acted that way once her sexuality was finally solidified ━ not that, in any light, she believes they would; just thinking or daydreaming about if your closest friends turned their back on you, how you’d react and what you’d feel… it’s a lot to handle, and it’s something that delivers a new perspective as she continues the conversation with Adena. It’s practically the definition of betrayal, Kat thinks.

“Some people are unbelievable, yes. Some people… cling onto their identity like it’s physically a part of them, and they don’t care how it makes them look,” again, Adena sighs. “They’re afraid of change,” she tells both of them, like she’s offering an excuse for her ex-friend. “Or I can at least say that from my experiences, and people I’ve come into contact with. It’s not my place to change their minds, though.”

“You changed mine,” sensing her girlfriend falling down a rabbit hole of old wounds and probable regrets, Kat smiles and displays affection to take her mind in a new direction; not everything is as hopeless as it seems from past experiences. “Thank you for saving me from my ‘straight’ self.”

Adena laughs at her praise, shaking her head to wipe the dopey smile off her face. The two fall quiet again, though the curt silence is diminished shortly after.

“Whatever you choose to label yourself, if you choose to label yourself…” Adena treads carefully, though her eyes portray the remnants of her prior smile, “just make sure it doesn’t dictate your view on certain issues or situations, or take over the Kat we know and love.”

“It won’t,” she shakes her head heavily. “I’m done seeing the world as entirely divided, like you’ve ignored one side of the aisle because you identify as another. I’m not doing that anymore. Not only on this subject, but all of them. Well,” one eye squints in thought, “most of them, at least. The chocolate versus vanilla debate is still going strong, and, for that, there’s only one correct side to be on.”

It gets another laugh, this time a shared round of giggles following as Adena nods in acceptance with a quiet, believing “Okay, good.”

Kat only studies Adena, demeanor full of love and admiration for the girl sitting near her as things quiet down and they’re left staring at each other through a thick, tense warmth that’s more smitten than something sultry. The eye contact brings Adena to remember that she never responded to the other girl’s wonder from before, so she presses her tongue to her inner cheek before adjusting her positioning on the bed.

“To answer your question…” she mutters, “I started feeling something for you almost immediately.”

“What?” the girl beams. “Are you serious?”

“You were persistent and confident, you had an argument for just about everything,” nodding her head, Adena remembers their first interaction, being more like a conflict than welcoming, but she purses her lips in entertainment. “It was intriguing, to say the least.”

“Was it a turn on?” her signature charm shines through, squinted eyes and smirk strong as if she already knows the answer ━ as if she’s convinced that she’s not wrong.

A laugh is heard, “In a mild sense of it, sure.”

“Mild? No way.”

“I was drawn to you,” Adena stays honest, giving Kat a simple thing to chew on. “I… wanted to know who you were, where you came from. Not just in a business setting, but as a person.”

“Have I lived up to your expectations?”

It’s initially just another flirtatious remark, but they both detect something more serious to the question, like the girl still wants reassurance that she’s doing this whole thing correctly. For that reason, Adena’s features soften, reaching for Kat’s hand and lacing their fingers together despite the weird angle they’re at.

“You’ve exceeded them.”

“Really?” Kat smiles big once more, and the expression is matched within a millisecond.

“Really.”

Both girls lean in at almost the same rate, though Kat seems a little more eager to connect their lips because, hell, knowing that she hasn’t messed things up too much just eases her mind further. She knows that, sure, maybe she shouldn’t believe that she’s fucked up at all ━ at least not enough to drive Adena away ━ but there’s always that lingering worry that she’ll lose a sense of who she’s become and she’ll revert back to the Kat who couldn’t stand commitment. Knowing that Adena has taken her quirks stride by stride is beyond reassuring and comforting, like a certain puzzle piece has been found after years of not even bothering to search for it. Perhaps that cliché saying is true: you’ll find what you’ve been searching for once you finally stop and let it come to you on its own.

She smiles into the kiss, laughing partly when Adena begins to back up with an inquisitive look in her eyes, but, instead of being overly cheesy and letting her girlfriend in on what she’s actually been thinking about, Kat evokes a new memory with a teasing, childish reminder:

“Does this mean our real, first official date was us putting vibrators together?”