#but dancing? ughg it's dredges up those old thoughts
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god I love dancing but I cannot deny that it does not always do good things to my body image my dudes
#every time we get professional photos back#im always hit with the realisation again that. well most of the dancers are a lot slimmer than me#and of course its a two edged sword because. oh the whole I have a much healthier body image#than when I was ACTUALLY ripped and gymming everyday and in that toxic environment#learning to accept that I didnt you know. need to do that. learning to love how I am. meant no longer working out in such an obsessive way.#which in turn means of course. I am now curvy. and most of the time. I love that.#but dancing? ughg it's dredges up those old thoughts#THING IS I know. I fucking know. that when I was in the prime of my fitness and diet fuckery. I had the WORST body image. it was bad#I fucking know going back there will not be good. and yet. the thoughts prevail#vent in tags
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