#but bobby actor is still too close to the bros for me somehow so i can't help but take psychic damage seeing him

[chaotictomtom]

spn bobby and brba/bcs mike should fuck isn't something i could predict my brain from thinking and yet here i am

[spnreactions]

15x18: Despair

Ahhhhh. 

Alright guys. I’m so pumped, but also so scared, because I couldn’t watch it live, and my mom and I are about to watch it on the app, but all of my friends sent me spoiler free reactions and I’m kind of freaking out now that I know how much they were dying. 

BUT ANYWAYS. 

Let’s do this. 

WAIT WAIT WAIT! 

That...that parallel...IS CAS GONNA FINALLY TELL THEM ABOUT HIS DEAL??!! 

MY POOR BABY AHHHH!!!! 

HE BETTER BE OKAY!!!! 

ARE THEY GONNA SHOW THE SPEECH??!! 

Oh boo. They didn’t show the speech. 

STOOOOOP! 

JUST RESOLVE IT ALREADY!! 

“Now.” 

Cas omg that’s not gonna help. I love you and I know you’re panicking, but no. That’s like when I’m having an anxiety attack and people are like “just calm down”. But anyways. 

Dean is panicking again OMG!! It’s nice to see him openly caring about his son again! <3 <3 <3 

I’m still a little upset with him, but that’s a good start. 

Jack noooo baby! We’re not doing that! 

Awww baby. :’( :’( :’( :’( :’(

“Don’t let me hurt you.” I’M ALREADY ABOUT TO CRY OH MY GOD! :’( :’( 

“We’re not giving up on you.” THERE’S THE DEAN I KNOW AND LOVE!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

BILLIE GO AWAY!!! 

Okay actually save Jack. 

But also SHUT UP! 

Yeah? And? 

HEY! NOT NICE!! 

It was SAVED because of them! Shut up! 

Cas is so desperate omg. :’( :’( :’( :’( 

UMMMMMMM

WHERE DID HE GO??!! 

They’re all so worried ahhhh.

IS THAT THE EMPTY??!! 

Noooooo no no no no. 

That’s bad. 

No likey. 

..........

...........!!!!

NO!!!

NO NO NO!!! 

PLEASE TELL ME THAT WASN’T REAL!!! 

PLEASE TELL ME THEY’RE GONNA FIX THAT!! 

I WASN’T EXPECTING THAT SO SOON NO!!! 

Their faces. :’( :’( :’(

...maybe? That’s a good thing, right? RIGHT?! 

God, I hate her so much, but da** Lisa Berry is good at playing the villain. 

Really? WONDER WHY!! 

Haha me too Dean. 

...they keep saying “not without being summoned” in regards to the Empty and it’s making me nervous. 

...oh. 

Frick. 

Just give it back if it means getting Jack back. 

TELL HER OFF SAM!! 

Ugh. Her sass is so good and I hate it but I love it. 

BILLIE SCREW YOU!!! 

LEAVE THEM ALONE!! JUST LET OUR FAMILY BE HAPPY!!! 

OH THANK GOD HE’S ALIVE!! 

I WAS HOPING!! 

And I kind of figured, but a part of me was nervous, okay? 

BABY! <3 <3 <3 

...oh no. 

Big uh-oh. 

BABY RUN!!! 

I DON’T KNOW WHERE, BUT RUN!!! 

RUN!!! 

RUN RUN RUN!!! 

HURRY UP BOYS!!!

JACK IS IN DANGER HURRY THE FRICK UP!!! 

HA!!! 

YAAAAS SAM!!! 

We be petty in this house. 

...okay AND??!! 

YAAAASSSS DEAN!!! I LOVE MY PROTECTIVE DAD DEAN AGAIN YAAAAAY!!!! 

NO NO NO NO NOOOO! LEAVE MY BABY ALONE!!! 

STOP IT!!! 

BILLIE HURRY UP!!! 

“Interesting”??? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??!! 

OH THANK GOD! 

...that was close. 

Ummm...no. 

We’re not doing that. 

YAAAAASSSSSSS DEAN!!!! 

THAT’S MY BABY!!!! 

THAT’S THE DEAN I KNOW AND LOVE!!! I’VE MISSED YOU!!! 

YOU ARE OFFICIALLY FORGIVEN DEAN WINCHESTER!!! 

YOU ARE BACK TO SECOND FAVORITE FOR THAT MOVE RIGHT THERE!!! 

FREAKING YES!!! 

I LOVE THIS FAMILY!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

Awww...Jack. :’( 

Cas running right over to him. 

Most of Cas’s lines so far have been “Jack” oof. XD :’( <3 <3 <3 

Okay so...this is...kind of a good thing, right? Like, obviously, Billie is still an issue, and obviously, Chuck is still an issue, but the FAMILY is TOGETHER again!! This is GOOD!! Why are my friends so upset about this episode?? What could possibly happen? (Anything. Anything could happen. Why would I even ask that?) 

Wow. That’s an awesome camera shot.  <3 

The smoothness of that omg I love them.  

YES DEAN!!! 

I FORGIVE YOU!! SAM FORGIVES YOU!!! <3 <3 <3 

ALL BETTER!!! I FORGIVE EVERYONE!! THIS IS GOOD!! <3 <3 <3 

(I mean, he still kind of owes Jack an apology, but, like, based on his character, everything he just did for Jack was his biggest way of saying sorry. <3 <3) 

HE SNAPPED OUT OF IT BECAUSE OF YOU SAM! 

Also it’s true. 

OMG EVEN BETTER CAMERA SHOT NOW THAT THEY’RE BOTH IN IT!! <3 <3 <3 <3 

It’s okay! Because YOU GUYS are the heavy hitters! 

“To somehow.” <3 <3 <3 <3 

THAT SHOT! I CAN’T GET OVER IT!! <3 <3 <3 

...hoh boy. 

Billie is MAAAD. 

...no likey. 

AHHHH. 

HAVE I MENTIONED LISA BERRY IS REALLY GOOD AT PLAYING THE VILLAIN??!! 

CAUSE SHE’S REALLY GOOD AT PLAYING THE VILLAIN!!

OMG MY GIIIIIRL!!! <3 <3 <3 

AWWW!! SHE FOUND A GIRLFRIEND!!! 

THIS IS SO CUTE OMG!!! 

I know it’s AU!Charlie, but STILL!! <3 <3 <3 

“Like a date.” A date only hunters could do lol. 

I love it. <3 <3 

They’re the cutest omg. <3 <3 

“Rubbery trash eggs.” I LOVE HER!! XD XD <3 <3 

...what the...

...did she just...vanish?? 

....???? 

NOOO POOR CHARLIE!! She finally had another relationship! GOD DA**IT!! 

...poor Charlie. :’( :’( :’( 

I remember Stevie from the second episode of this season. I didn’t remember her name though. 

Awww...Charlie. 

...they don’t seem that surprised. Uh-oh...

...poor Charlie. :’( :’( :’( :’( 

SHE DESERVES A GOOD LIFE GOSH DARNAT!! 

Awww... <3 <3 

MY BABY LOOKS SO SAD!!! 

OMG THAT BANTER WAS ADORABLE!! XD XD <3 <3 <3 

PROMO PIC!! THESE ADORABLE LITTLE BOIS!! <3 <3 <3 

Awww...baby. :’( :’( :’( 

Baby it’s okay. We’d rather have you here, we promise. 

He’s choking up oh my goodness Alex how dare you be such a good actor. 

BABY YOU’RE HERE FOR US!! YOU’RE HERE FOR YOUR FAMILY!! <3 <3 

YAAAASSS CAS!!! 

“We care about you because you’re you.” OH MY GOD I’M GONNA CRY THAT’S SUCH A GOOD LINE!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 

Jack that should’ve made you smile so much more than it did please stop beating yourself up you deserve happiness and love and they’re giving it to you because they love you gosh darnat. :’( <3 

...awww...

YOU CAN BE THERE!! THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS!! 

AWWW!!! :’( :’( :’( 

“Me too.” AND THEN WITH THE HAND ON THE SHOULDER AHHH!!! <3 <3 <3 

They need to hug. 

Hug please. 

Dangat. 

That’s okay. I’ll still take that. Good scene. 

HA!

Well, okay, Sam. Don’t sugarcoat it. 

Okay but, like, gotta be honest...I don’t think it’s Billie. Cause...these people are vanishing just like Becky did...like Chuck made her. 

Charlie... :’( :’( :’( :’( 

Charlie no! It’s not like that. 

:’( :’( :’( :’( :’( 

...no likey. 

NO NO NO NO NOOOO!!! 

She has to be fine. 

GO GO GO!!!

My ending has Sam ending up with Eileen at the end. She better not be dead. 

Oh thank goodness. That’s a text thread. Good. 

But, like...if people are vanishing, what do they do? How do they protect her? 

....it’s gonna stop isn’t it.

FRICK!!

NO NO NO NO NO!!!

NO!!!

DA**IT!!!

IS THIS GONNA KEEP HAPPENING??!! 

IS THIS WHAT MY FRIENDS WERE TALKING ABOUT??!! 

THE WAY DEAN JUST REVS IT AND SPEEDS UP OMG. <3 <3 <3 <3 

Please Eileen...please let it be a fluke. 

...she’s not standing there. 

It’s not a fluke. :’( :’( :’( :’( 

HER BACKGROUND IS SAM OH MY GOD!! 

THEY WERE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER!! :’( :’( <3 <3 <3 <3 

GOD DA**IT SUPERNATURAL!! :’( :’( :’( :’( 

...poor Sam. :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( 

Dean’s little supportive “Sammy” oh my god. 

Oh my god Sam. :’( :’( :’( :’( 

I’m crying already ahhh. :’( :’( :’( 

Sam you’re so strong omg you poor thing. :’( :’( :’( 

HE DESERVES A GOOD LIFE TOO GOSH DARNAT!!

WAIT NO!! DON’T SPLIT THE PARTY!! BAD THINGS ALWAYS HAPPEN WHEN YOU SPLIT THE PARTY!!! 

Okay that’s awesome though. 

But also don’t split the party. 

Well frick. 

OOH!! DOES THIS MEAN WE’RE GONNA GET SOME GOOD OLD DEAN AND CAS CONTENT? CAUSE THAT’S BEEN LACKING RECENTLY! 

Oh frick. Something is SOO gonna go wrong, with a hug like that. 

But also DEAN GIVING HIS BRO A SUPPORTIVE HUG OMG I LOVE IT!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

And Sam just leaning into it because he totally needs it but he’s trying not to break down but also that’s such a beautiful, subtle thing and I love it. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

That little look and nod just made a tear slip down my cheek (as if I wasn’t already blurry-eyed and crying). 

“Let’s go reap a reaper.” PROMO LINE!! <3 <3 <3 <3 

DONNA!! <3 <3 <3 <3 

Sam being a protective dad and being distracted by checking in on his son I love it. <3 <3 

I love my three protective dads in this it’s adorable. 

DUDE!!! 

JACK DRIVE BABY!!! 

OMG SAM I LOVE YOU FOR DOING THAT!!! 

HE’S DOING WHAT HE KNOWS WILL DISTRACT HIM AND CHEER HIM UP BECAUSE IT’S WHAT HE DID WITH DEAN AND GIVES HIM SOMETHING TO DO OMG IT’S SO CUTE I LOVE IT!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 

Whoa. That music change. That was intense. 

NICE SHOT OF DEAN!! <3 <3 <3 <3 

GO DEAN AND CAS GO! 

“Hiya kid.” “Hey.” So soft omg. <3 <3 <3 <3 

Awww baby... 

THAT HUG!!! 

IT WAS IN THE PROMO!!! 

AWWW DONNA!!! :’( :’( :’( <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

THEY BETTER BE OKAY!!! 

I’M GONNA BE REALLY MAD IF THEY’RE NOT OKAY!!! 

“Anything you need.” I freaking love Donna. She’s such an under-appreciated character. <3 <3 

MY GIRL! <3 <3 

YAAAASSS CHARLIE!! <3 <3 <3 

Poor thing...

But also I love you and I’m proud of you. 

God all of my favorite characters are suffering and losing so much I hate it. :’( :’( :’( :’( 

JUST LIKE BACK IN S14!!! 

Ha! Bobby omg. XD XD 

No. 

It probably won’t given our luck. 

Awww Sam.... :’( 

...there are kids in there. 

...which definitely means it isn’t gonna work. 

But I’m gonna be optimistic and let myself get crushed anyways. 

Awww Donna.... 

Awww Jack..... :’( 

UMMMMMM

....what?? 

What just happened?? 

That is so not cool. 

That is completely against everything Jack is what? 

No. 

Not okay. 

Don’t tell me he destroys anything he touches now. 

I don’t know how that would’ve happened. 

But no. 

....uh oh. 

That’s too easy. 

Run boys. 

OH MY GOD DID SHE JUST--

OH MY GOD SHE JUST--

“Hello boys.” HOLY FRICK I’M WHEEZING HOW DARE SHE MAKE ME LAUGH!! XD XD 

HA! 

GET HER DEAN! 

But also run because this is too easy. 

EEEEEE!! I DIG A BADA** DEAN!!! 

God she’s such a good villain, but also screw you Billie!! 

PROMO SCENE!!! 

DEAN HURRY!!!! 

YES!!!!

GO DEAN!!!!

GET HER!!!

IT’S CHUCK!!! 

I FREAKING KNEW IT!!! 

...dangat. 

We can’t do anything about that....

PROMO SCENE!!

SYMBOLS ARE GONNA LIGHT UP! 

YEP! I WAS RIGHT! 

I over-analyze those promos way too much lol. 

Wait...for what? 

It has to be! 

NOOOO. No likey. 

FRICK! 

DANGAT! 

I KNEW IT! 

NO NO NOOOO!!! 

OH MY GOD NO! 

THIS WAS IN THE PROMO! 

CHARLIE NOOOOO!!!! :’( :’( :’( 

BOBBY. NO!!!!

WE’RE LOSING EVERYBODY NOOO!!!

Oh no. 

No no no no no. 

Not Donna. 

Don’t you dare. 

Tell me it’s not true. 

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( 

HA! 

WELL TAKE THAT BILLIE!! 

ATTABOY DEAN!!! 

Wait nooooooo. 

That’s bad! 

Nope nope nope. 

Run you two. 

OMG that little moment. 

Cas stepped protectively in front of Dean, and then Dean immediately pulled him back and out of harms way. <3 <3 <3 

PROMO! 

BILLIE IS SCARY AHHH!! 

RUN YOU GUYS!!! 

Good call. 

But also how do you run from a cosmic entity??

Oh my god...

Jack’s face... 

Sam’s face...

:’( :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( 

DOES THIS MEAN JODY AND THE GIRLS ARE GONE TOO??!! 

OH GOD I DON’T WANNA THINK ABOUT THAT. 

Dean talking to himself. <3 

HEY!!!

STOP THAT!!! 

PROTECTIVE CAS! <3 <3 <3 <3 

BILLIE GO AWAY!!! NO ONE LIKES YOU!! 

SCREW YOU BILLIE!!! 

YEAH IT DOES, AND IT BETTER F**ING STAY THAT WAY!!! 

HA! 

YES CAS! WAY TO GET HIM OUT OF THERE! <3 <3 <3 

“I’ve got you.” <3 <3 <3 <3 

PROMO!

No. 

It’s never time. 

Shut up Billie. 

NO! 

LEAVE THEM ALONE! 

YES CAS!! 

SO PROTECTIVE I LOVE IT!! <3 <3 <3 <3 

YES CAS!!! WAY TO GO YOU AMAZING ANGEL YOU!!! 

...uh oh. 

PROMO! 

....no likey. 

Come on you two...you can do this. 

YES CAS! <3 

Dean...don’t do that to yourself. :’( :’( :’( :’( 

Not now baby. We need you. You need to be strong. You can do this. 

Awww Dean. :’( :’( :’( :’( 

I feel a big emotional scene coming. 

PROMO OMG NOOO! 

Dean honey. :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( 

Dean. :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( 

Cas’s look...

Dean’s so sad. :’( :’( :’( 

CAS HAS AN IDEA!!! 

The Empty??

Oh wait...

Is he...

HE’S GONNA TELL HIM!!

WAIT!!

WAIT HOLD ON A SECOND!!

WHAT ARE YOU THINKING CAS??!!

Dean’s face...

..........!!!!!

WAIT A MINUTE!!

WAIT!

A!

MINUTE!!

IS THIS DESTIEL??!!

IS! THIS?! DESTIEL?! 

OH MY GOD I’M GONNA CRY!! THE WAY HIS VOICE IS CRACKING!! 

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD I’M CRYING!!! :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( 

MISHA’S ACTING RIGHT NOW OMG!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

OH MY GOD CAS OH MY GOD MISHA OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!! 

“You raise your little brother for love.” :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

OH MY GOD CAS!!! :’( :’( :’( <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

....my reactions might wind up getting slim because I’m really starting to cry.... :’( :’( :’( :’( 

“Because of you.” :’( :’( :’( <3 <3 <3 <3 

“You changed me, Dean.” <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

WAIT NOOO!!! CAS NOOOO!!! DON’T DO IT!! :’( :’( :’( :’(

HOLY FRICK!!!

HOLY FRICK HOLY FRICK HOLY FRICK!!! 

GUYS!!!! 

IT FINALLY HAPPENED!!! 

DESTIEL JUST BECAME CANON!!! 

“I love you.” <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 

“The one thing I want, it’s something I can’t have.” <3 <3 <3 

THAT IS DESTIEL PEOPLE!! 

IT IS CANON!!! 

TWELVE YEARS!!! 

AND DESTIEL IS CANON!!!! 

I CAN’T BELIEVE IT OH MY GOD THIS IS AMAZING!!

WAIT NO NO NO I TAKE THAT BACK I DON’T LIKE WHERE THIS IS GOING!!!

“Don’t do this, Cas.” :’( :’( :’( :’( :’( 

OH MY GOD NOOOOO!!!! 

THE HANDPRINT!!!! :’( :’( :’( :’( 

WTF!!! 

OH MY GOD!!!!

....

I can’t...

I can’t type...

I’m hyperventilating.

There are tears just streaming. 

WTF??!! 

DID THEY SERIOUSLY JUST INFINITY WAR THIS SH**??!! 

ARE YOU F***ING KIDDING ME??!! 

YOU HIT ME WITH CAS??!! 

AND THEN THIS??!! 

I can’t type...

.....

HOLY. 

FRICK. 

Just so we’re clear. 

I am writing this review portion. 

A good two hours after watching that episode. 

And I’m still crying. 

Even thinking about everything that just happened. 

What. 

The. 

F**k. 

WTF WAS THAT??!! 

DID THEY JUST--

DID THEY ACTUALLY--

*SCREAMS* 

Okay, let me try this again, and I’m gonna try extra hard not to burst into tears this time. 

That. 

Was. 

Epic. 

Oh my god. 

Between all of the s**t that’s going down in the world (and yes, I saw all the memes), THIS was the LAST thing I was expecting. 

DESTIEL.

IS.

CANON. 

CAS.

IS.

DEAD.

GUYS!!!

SERIOUSLY HELP!!! 

I...I can’t even process. 

Destiel is canon. 

Supernatural is Avengers: Infinity War. 

Jack destroys anything he touches. 

And meanwhile, Nevada is still counting votes, and Putin stepped down. 

Man. This is a day.  

Everything hurts. 

And I’m still crying. 

Okay. 

Despite all of the emotional trauma that this has caused, I’m going to try really hard to analyze this episode like I usually do. 

Let me just start with: wow. 

The cinematography in this was incredible, and Richard Speight’s acting was genius. Everything about this episode--visuals, music, set, everything--was just so brilliantly done and flowed so beautifully together. The scene changes, the transitions, the build-up of tension--it was beautiful. 

They hit those emotions right from the start, in big ways and subtle ways. Between putting beloved characters in danger, to killing some of them off entirely, to little hugs and smiles and words spoken, I was just as shaky and teary-eyed as I was last week. 

And all of it--all of it--culminated into one of the most beautiful scenes that this show has ever created. The amount of raw emotion that was in that Destiel scene was beautiful. The facial expressions of Cas and Dean were so clearly conveying how they felt--how deep Cas’s love truly was, and how scared and confused Dean was. The script. Those lines. The delivery. All of it put meticulously together, piece by piece, in a terrifying, emotional, tension-filled sequence that made something happen that the show has needed for years.

We finally got Destiel. 

And then to have it ripped away, just like that, because Cas was finally happy. Cas was finally happy because he told Dean how he felt, and because he could go out doing the one thing he’d always wanted to do--love him so much that he had to save him. 

Holy. 

Freaking. 

Cow. 

Look.

I was not a Destiel shipper from Day 1, okay? I wasn’t. I always saw their relationship as a brotherhood, and a friendship, and a special bond. 

But as the years went on, and I continued re-watching old episodes and comparing them to new ones, I started to see the Destiel relationship for what it was. 

And let me tell you right now: this scene? This was the final icing on the cake. 

If you didn’t already see the Destiel, then this...this should’ve done it. 

Because wow.

And while we’re talking about “wow”...

Misha Collins. 

Misha. 

F***ing. 

Collins. 

Holy god almighty. 

That was an INCREDIBLE acting moment. 

That was an Oscar-winning, Emmy-winning, stardom performance from a true legend. 

The way he conveyed all of that raw emotion, and the way the tears fell as he just let it all out. Every pronunciation fo every word was so deliberate and done in just the right way. 

And to end it all with the most satisfied, happiest look as his character gave his life for the man he loved. 

As he pushed his lover away and left a bloody handprint behind. 

Misha F***ing Collins is a F***ing Rockstar. 

Holy sh**. 

That could not have a been a better ending for Castiel. 

All of the parallels, and all of the callbacks, and everything that has happened between Cas and Dean came to a head in that very moment. 

And as much as I cried, and as much as I will still be crying for a long, long time...

It was beautiful. 

Then, after all of that, to just top it all off with everyone disappearing, Infinity War style, and to end on that scene of Dean crying, head in his hands, on the floor, weeping, his only remnant of his lost love staining his shoulder. 

And Sam and Jack, just staring into the nothingness that is the rest of the world before staring at each other, lost, and confused, worried that the rest of their family is dead and gone and they’re the only ones left. 

I have no words. 

I cannot describe how incredibly horrifying, and hurtful, and emotional, and beautiful that entire episode was. 

From start to finish, it was a true masterpiece. And I cannot say that enough. 

With two episodes left, I have no idea where this is going to take us next. 

I don’t know if Cas is going to come back. 

I have a feeling he isn’t. Not with an ending like that. At least, not in a way we might expect. 

But I do think we’ll get a resolution to the Destiel moment. I think Dean will have a moment where he wishes he could’ve had the courage to say it back, or a moment where all we see is him grieving, just as Sam grieves Eileen. 

And I wonder if, when all is said and done, Cas will come back in some other way--in heaven, or in dreams, or in some form. Because that would be a good way to do it, in my opinion.

But beyond that, I don’t know what’s next for Sam and Dean and Jack. 

I have a feeling that, like Infinity War (I’m sorry, but that’s totally what it reminded me of), not everyone will stay dead. My hope is that they’ll be brought back somehow. After all, that’s what our boys are all about, right?

But honestly, I don’t know anymore. 

Any theories I had about the deaths of future characters or the survival of others was thrown out the window by Cas’s death in this episode, and honestly, I’m going to be crying about that for the foreseeable future. I’ll never get over it, but at the same time, I won’t even not love it, because it was perfect, and with it came Destiel. 

That’s honestly all I can say. The tears are still falling, and my heart is still aching, but god da**it, that was a good episode. 

My Rating: 25/10 (These numbers are just going to keep getting higher and higher, aren’t they? I probably should’ve started lower...) 

P.S. I honest to god am still trying to process all this, so I’ll react to the promo tomorrow night. <3 

[tgaoe]

Andy’s 2017 Television Report

I love watching good TV. I still feel there’s a stigma associated with watching as much as I do, but I’m trying to own it. I love TV. I would much rather watch an old West Wing ep than go on a hike or do basically anything outdoorsy. So there that is. And here is an exhaustive list of everything I watched this year.

Not Enough Time and/or Motivation to Watch/Finish Ranked by Level of Intention to Watch/Finish

10. The Vietnam War 9. Godless 8. The Young Pope S1 7. The Handmaid’s Tale S1 6. Search Party S2 5. Rick & Morty S3 4. Halt and Catch Fire S4 3. You’re the Worst S4 2. Better Things S2 1. Broad City S4

Disappointing/Bad The Americans S5 Starts strong, has some nice character development, but the main story was inconsequential and frustrating, as were several side stories.

Preacher S2 Has cool moments and I still love the three leads, but the main plot left me cold. Not even close to as good as the debut season.

Sherlock S4 Stupid and infuriating.

Seasons I Liked, Ranked by Favoritism 32 Curb Your Enthusiasm S8 Same old show, wearing a little thin but still enjoyable.

31 I Love Dick Obtuse, intentionally discomfiting, wonderfully acted; Kathryn Hahn is a goddess.

30 Stranger Things S2 A fun time and not much more, which is fine.

29 Veep S6 Somehow exactly the same cruel, cynical show despite a somewhat significant premise shift.

28 Silicon Valley S4 More of the same. Not sure how much longer this show can sustain the whole “awkward tech bros overcoming impossible odds” premise. Hoping for some risks next season.

27 Vice Principals S2 A hilarious, surprisingly emotional comedy that will always be stuck in the shadow of its predecessor.

26 Love S2 Rock solid cast, writing with a nice balance of comedy, drama, and romance.

25 Bojack Horseman S4 I like this show less than everyone else who likes it, feels like. Still, no other televised depiction of depression rings truer, and remains funny without making light of serious mental illness.

24 Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp Manic, inspired inanity.

23 Brooklyn Nine Nine S4/S5 Comfort food. Love everyone on the show. Every episode is the same and always will be and who cares.

22 Legion S1 In a year that hadn’t also included Twin Peaks: the Return, this would have ranked much higher for its crazy formalist experimentation, dazzling visual style, and sustained weirdness. Wish it had been more character-focused, and I hated the coda. Almost dreading season two.

21 Easy S2 Warm, human, real. Love the whole notion of a serialized anthology.

20 GLOW S1 Spending time with these characters just feels great, even when they’re behaving awfully. It’s the kind of show the predictability of which is a positive.

19 Big Little Lies S1 Reese Witherspoon projectile vomits pure green goop in this show. It rules.

18 Crashing S1 You love Pete or you don’t. I love him, have for years. The show is just more Pete.

17 The Good Place S1/S2 Quite possibly the most imaginative, innovate half-hour sitcom of all time; inspires equal investment in the characters and the ever-expanding mythology and mysteries, which is quite a feat.

16 Top of the Lake: China Girl Full review.

15 Fargo S3 By far the weakest season of the show, yet still one of the year’s best. Willfully disgusting and perhaps a bit too writerly, the last few episodes redeem some early rambling and formlessness. Ewan McGregor was not great in his role(s), and Carrie Coon’s performance was done a disservice by her appearing here and in The Leftovers simultaneously. But Mary Elizabeth Winstead and David Thewlis kill.

14 Ozark S1 Every 2-3 episodes contain enough plot for a full season of most other shows. It is wild. Characters at once inhabit archetypes and subvert them. I love how the main means of circumventing trouble is simply telling the truth.

13 One Mississippi S2 The best pure romance story on TV this year.

12 Future Man S1 Starts rough, slowly gets great. Consummately derivative sci-fi comedy. Couldn’t love it more.

11 Mindhunter S1 Spent most of the season deciding whether Jonathan Groff is terrible or magnificent here. Landed on magnificent, for the way he oscillates between ego states in response to story turns, negotiating his perceptions of both the concept of deviance and his sense of his own masculinity.

10 Dear White People S1 The number of characters this show balances is a miracle, and how it engenders empathy for all parties while maintaining its slick, ultracool visual style and exploring sensitive themes with the utmost nuance.

9 Mr. Robot S3 A vast improvement after the letdown of season two. Takes some weird risks that attempt retrofit current events into the show’s 2015 setting, and while not all of them work, the ones that do pay off massively. Plot mechanics are secondary to atmosphere, character, and theme. The cast is great as ever, and this year Bobby Cannavale joins the fray, which is never a bad idea.

8 Insecure S2 Continues to use top-notch production values and writing to explore lifestyles and perspectives previously ghettoized on TV, relegated to peripheral channels and the lowest of low budgets. Issa Rae’s performance is reliably loveable despite her character’s constant questionable decisions, but Yvonne Orji truly makes the show. Somebody cast her and Tiffany Haddish in something together asap.

7 Better Call Saul S3 Slow, methodical, pulpy, consistent. Another solid season of intricate, character-driven puzzle-piece storytelling.

6 American Vandal S1 The funniest entertainment of any type I consumed all year, and surprisingly thematically resonant as it progresses toward its conclusion.

5 Master of None S2 As funny, romantic, and charming as its creator. Tackles some surprisingly heavy subjects, has gained significant poignancy after cultural shifts that came later in the year.

4 The Deuce S1 An even seedier iteration of David Simon’s expansive storytelling style than The Wire, the period details of this show are casually perfect; unshowy and lived in. The Deuce convinced me that James Franco is one of our greatest living actors, on the level of someone like De Niro in his prime. Franco plays twins, and though they look and sound exactly alike, his slightly varied physicality always makes it clear who each is.

3 The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel S1 Such fun. A romantically stylized 1950s New York period piece starring a woman who should be, and might yet become, our biggest movie star. Nicely balances light comedy and light drama. Watching feels like cuddling up in a warm blanket.

2 Twin Peaks: the Return Mystifying, hilarious, infuriating, horrifying, wonderful.

1 The Leftovers S3 Not just the best season of television this year, but one of the greatest of all time. I have never been more satisfied by a finale. I refuse to write more lest I spoil anything. If you have not watched this show, watch it. The first season is flawed and difficult. The second is perfect, and so is the third. If this show’s premise even remotely appeals to you, watch it.

Favorite Episodes 12 “Amber Waves” The Americans S5E1 Bold start to an ultimately weak season. Features a ten-minute sequence during which a group of characters silently and methodically dig a hole, and somehow it is almost impossibly dramatic and exciting to watch. Here’s hoping the show picks up again for its final season next year.

11 “Chicanery” Better Call Saul S3E5 A courtroom episode rife with familial drama and series history exploited to maximum effect.

10 “Prodigal Daughter” Easy S2E6 A small, deeply humanist story of a high school girl discovering what she values, and how she wants to manifest those values. Lovely.

9 “Chapter V” Dear White People S1E5 Builds tension to a fever pitch using dialogue, editing, and camera techniques  downright orchestral. Directed by Barry Jenkins, of Moonlight fame.

8 “Part 8” Twin Peaks: the Return Several professional writers called this David’s Lynch’s Tree of Life, and I can’t describe it more succinctly than that. Lynch traces the origin of evil in his universe in a way no person who ever lived would except him.

7 “Who Rules the Land of Denial?” Fargo S3E8 For the bowling alley scene alone.

6 “eps3.4_runtime-err0r.r00” Mr. Robot S3E5 A bravura, (faked) single-take episode that brilliantly uses transit time to build tension.

5 “eps3.7_dont-delete-me.ko” Mr. Robot S3E8 The opposite of bravura; Elliot walks around with a young boy for most of the episode, and it is even more kinetic and exciting than the one with the single take.

4 “Amarsi Un Po'”/“Buona Notte” Master of None S2E9/E10 Heartbreaking. Aziz Ansari’s tribute to the Before Trilogy, and, let’s be honest, the Elevator arc from Louie, is brutal in its exposure of emotional truth. The chemistry between the leads makes the whole thing work.

3 “Part 18” Twin Peaks: the Return The finale. Mystifying, infuriating, horrifying, wonderful. Decidedly not hilarious.

2 “Thanksgiving” Master of None S2E8 A deeply-moving short film exposing a type of hardship so specific that I’d never seen it depicted before. The ways Ansari marks the passage of time throughout this story… just astounding.

1 “The Book of Nora” The Leftovers S3E8 Perfect. There is a monologue here with more story and gravitas than entire seasons of other shows, great ones. Watch The Leftovers.