#but I'm just proud of him ... this chapter alone is a good demonstration of his character development of the personal level

[haru-chi]

Okay, let's talk about the recent Natuyuu chapter for a little bit ... and something that just moved me to tears ><

let's ignore that the appearance they teased was for the cats and not what I wanted and wished for which's fine I'm fine I knew it was impossible .. yet hoped nonetheless

the chapter was really cute indeed, but I was shocked that the Reiko's pic was gonna be addressed right after the reveal !!! that took me by surprise yet a very happy one to confirm what I was saying back then ...

but before that, the way Natsume started to realize and know for sure that that might've been Reiko by remembering his father was too much for me ...

this chapter was such a good demonstration of how much our little sunshine has grown so much emotionally ... I was tearing up seeing him trying very hard to remember that blurry memory of his father taking him to an amusement park T^T

the boy who forced the memories out of his system so as not be broken down by it .. the same boy who refused to see the only parents' picture he had so that he won't be hurt or cry when he sees them ... who always pretending to be fine talking about his real family .. who ran away from any mention of them that he just purged any faint memory he once had till the point he really forgot everything related to them despite how this act of itself was hurting him deeply ...

this same boy right now is doing his best to remember his own father .. to remember a said precious memory .. he was trying really hard something the past Natsume would never do .. but sadly, all he managed was those blurry images .. he no longer remembers his father's face .. yet he wasn't broken down or sad .. he was actually happy as if he holds something dear to him .. that even if it's blurry, even if he no longer remembers it much ... the fact that it exists no matter how faint it was was enough for him .. he does have such a happy memory inside of him afterall .. he was content by this alone .. not pain or sadness but happy to know it was there ..

I can't say it well enough how much he has grown up now ...

and when by the end he did remember this faint memory very clearly .. he didn't cry or was sad (I sure was tho) No, he was very happy as if he was above the clouds dreaming something nice ... even Madara comment that he was weirdly happy and daydreaming ...

this was just ... how to say it ... it just moved me to tears with happiness ..

and his father ... his father was such a kind loving father which just break my heart even further .... Natsume didn't cry but I cried in his place ... even tho I was also happy and proud of him so much ..

Now to Reiko ...

I really was happy how Midorikawa-sensei proved my point when I said that Natsume lacks the ability to recognize a happy Reiko because he just never seen her like that, so even when that picture was indeed Reiko Natsume's mind was like "a girl that looked like Reiko" ... I won't dig deeper for this since I already did for a bit in a different post.

"if that picture was indeed Reiko, is the reason I didn't recognize her because that was an expression I have never seen before ?? I think that smile perhaps was ...."

the way Midorikawa-sensei let Natsume realize that through his father's memory was clever yet cruel to me .. while also proving that that smile was indeed toward someone she loved (her husband) .. a kind of smile that you show to someone dear to you like the loving smile Natsume's father showed to him in that memory ...

now was the artist her husband ?? or was it a 3rd party who knows both of them, so they only captured the moment ?? in the first place why was her picture in an exorcist auction ?? I guess that the next question that Natsume needs to address now that he confirmed she was indeed Reiko :)

slowly but surely, the grandfather reveal is upon us and I'm here for it and all the pain he will bring with Reiko's full story :)

PS : a funny thought that occurred to me when Natsume was thinking " what kind of person will buy that picture I wonder?" and my mind went "who knows, maybe he will be Yorishima as plot twist" as if that shut-in exorcist will go to auctions or even leave his house for that matter xDD

[thebookworm0001]

fic author self rec

Thank you for the tag, @rosella-writes !!!!

When you get this, reply with your favourite five fics that you’ve written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love.

So I have about a million wips and small things that I have put on the inter-webs, but only a handful of actually finished, published fics which makes this almost more of a 'here's my entire catalogue' post but I sure aint complaining about that lol

without further ado:

Last Chance

Rating: E Pairing: Ellana Lavellan x Solas Summary: After years of work fighting against Fen'harel and his agents, the final battle between former Inquisitor Lavellan and the man she loves is only one night away. Links: Tumblr | AO3 Length: 6k, 1 chapter, complete; part of the 'post-trespasser' collection This was the first ever smut fic I wrote and I am wildly proud of it. Do you want to be in pain? Well, this is the angst-filled smut fic for you. I have it on good authority that this will make you cry. This is also meant to be near the very end of a long-fic that I have started but have yet to post anything finished for, so there's a lot of build-up to this that does not yet exist but you can imagine as being very angsty.

2. Stolen Moments

Rating: G Pairing: Ellana Lavellan x Solas Summary: Ellana and Solas steal a moment alone. Alt. solavellan did not get a repeatable kiss scene and I’m fixing that. Links: Tumblr | AO3 Length: 1.2k, 2 chapters, complete; part of the 'in-between' collection This is just a sweet solavellan moment. No pain here! It also comes with some incredible, amazing, absolutely stunning artwork courtesy of @rosenrotxiii which you can see in the second chapter on ao3 or linked in the tumblr post

3. In the Morning

Rating: G Pairing: Ellana Lavellan x Solas Summary: When Solas wakes, it is to the sound of her breath. Alt. pov of the end of Last Chance. Links: Tumblr | AO3 Length: 670, 1 chapter, complete; part of the 'post-trespasser' collection Did you want to have your heart wrecked just a bit more? Was Last Chance simply not painful enough for you? Congratulations I wrote the end of that one from Solas' POV so you could relish in the solavellan hell just a little longer.

4. Laundry Day

Rating: E Pairing: Ellana Lavellan x Solas Summary: After the Dread Wolf’s defeat at the hands of the former Inquisitor, his punishment is far more lenient than many were anticipating. House arrest, under the supervision of the Herald of Andraste herself. As Ellana and Solas settle into their new lives, neither has forgotten the events just before their final confrontation, and, caught in close quarters, old feelings begin to resurface. Follow-up to Last Chance Links: Tumblr | AO3 Length: 4.4k, 1 chapter, complete; part of the 'post-trespasser' collection So, this is also meant to be part of a long-fic that I have yet to write. In the ending where solas and ellana both survive his attempt to reshape the world and her killing him to stop that from happening, Solas's punishment is house arrest under the watchful eye of the very woman who defeated him. There is much tension. This is a sweet smut fic - need to soothe your soul after Last Chance but still want smut? This is your thing.

5. Modeling Expectations

Rating: E Pairing: Ellana Lavellan x Eludysia Lavellan Summary: Since taking a body, Ellana has come to rely on Eludysia to help her navigate the waking world and its new experiences, but one inquiry leads to a more hands-on demonstration than she expected. Ancient Elvhenan AU. Links: Tumblr | AO3 Length: 3k, 1 chapter, complete My dear friend @roseategales and I share many an au where our (unrelated!) Lavellans fall in love with each other and with Solas. This particular throuple au is an elvhenan au in which Ellana is a recently embodied spirit of Curiosity. In this fic, she's a bit curious about sex and 'Dysia is very happy to give her some instruction.

Firstly, apologies if I'm not the first to tag you, but I would like to tag: @roseategales (go check out her throuple smut fic if she doesn't rec it herself) @bdafic @redinkofshame @noire-pandora @shift-shaping

[random-red-ramblings]

This fic is now finished! Read the whole chapter on ao3

Frenchie finished with a flourish of lively strumming, the crew cheering, clapping and stomping their feet. In the commotion Ed held Stede tight from behind, lifted him off the deck and spun around.

Stede wouldn't say that he squealed, but it was a rather high-pitched noise of surprise that quickly dissolved into laughter.

"Ed! Ed! I rather think I'm dizzy enough already, thank you!"

They slowed to a stop, and Stede's feet gently touched solid wood. Ed's hand rested at his elbow and guided Stede to turn and face him, (as if Stede needed encouragement on that front).

"Well, if you need to slow things down… may I have this dance, Captain Bonnet?"

Ed bowed low, one arm against his chest, the other swept out to the side, his eyes never leaving Stede's for a second. The more emotionally sensitive members of the crew gasped and oo-ed, vocalising what Stede's heart experienced.

"You may, Captain Teach."

Stede offered his hand. Ed took it, kissed it, and pulled Stede forward by it as he straightened up. Stede took the opportunity to kiss him, soft and chaste and grateful.

"Right lads!" Ed called to the band. "We need a beat like this."

He clapped to demonstrate his desired rhythm until Wee John copied him.

"I can sing something romantic?" The Swede offered.

"Don't encourage them," Jim groaned.

"That'd be fucking ideal mate," Ed gave him a thumbs-up, opting to ignore any playful grumbling entirely.

Then Ed neatly stepped away, getting into position for a minuet. Stede mirrored him, thinking of nothing but how much he loved this beautiful, sensitive, brilliant, wonderful man.

Ed was perfect, he didn't put a foot wrong, and Stede felt so proud of him. He still gave a cursory glance downwards, but otherwise his eyes were fixed on Stede, blessing him with smiles of tender, vulnerable joy that he only entrusted to Stede. Stede didn't think he could feel any luckier, any more blessed, than in that moment.

He could sense the crew watching, but wasn't affected by it. It wasn't long before they wanted to join in anyway - swinging each other around, marching up and down the deck with a partner with increasingly ridiculous and exaggerated steps. Their own faultless minuet eventually descended into such silliness and laughter.

And it was still perfect.

Stede didn't even notice the first drops of rain, but it quickly became heavy. Large cold drops pelted him, but Ed didn't stop dancing, didn't stop smiling, so neither did Stede.

"Oh, come on," Lucius yelled. "It's time to take it downstairs."

"Captains!" Wee John boomed at them.

"Fucks sake, leave them to go overboard if they don't have any fucking sense." Izzy had apparently returned to be a voice of reason when the crew would actually listen.

Stede ignored him on principle, spinning Ed around again. Ed laughed, Izzy swore, and everyone left them alone with the rain.

It became difficult to keep his footing as the deck got more slippery and the ship began to rock more forcefully, but he clung to Ed who had expert sealegs and felt safe. When Ed's leg buckled under him, it was Stede that stopped him falling, catching him in a dip.

They looked at each other, stunned, breathless, soaking and happy. Stede leaned in to kiss Ed's smile.

A wave buffeted the ship, almost making them both topple down but they clung to each other and the rigging.

I forgot what the storm would do to your knee.

"I forgot-" Stede started, before realising his voice was entirely lost in the wind and rain.

He thought he knew what Ed's answer would be.

It's a good job you made me wear the brace.

Maybe even with an added 'thanks, love', if he was lucky.

Together they fought their way to the stairs, and as soon as they were in that walkway, protected from the elements, Stede could hear his heart thudding in his ears. He was trembling, and not just from the cold.

[fangirlings-things]

Ocean Eyes I

OCEAN EYES MASTERLIST

Word count: 3.9K

SET ON 5x12

A/N: guyssss here is the first chapter!!! i want to thank you all for the positive feedback, the comments and reblogs, likes thank youuu so much!!! hope you guys like the beginning of this story, love love love 💖

tag list: @castielsangelsx ; @ritual-unions-gotme ; @freckled-lass ; @irrelevantyettopicalusername ; @charming-merlin ; @pieces-by-me

Vikings tag list: @maggiescarborough ; @charmingvalkyrie

TAG LIST IS OPEN || ALL GIFS USED IN HERE BELONG TO ME

─━─━─「⊱✠⊰」─━─━━─━─「⊱✠⊰」━─━─

They were brought in by the guards in a group of four. Two women at the middle and two tall men, the sons of Ragnar, at the edges. 

From your spot, close to one of the great walls alongside with your mother, Judith, and your brother, Aethelred, you took it upon yourself to analyze all of them as you tried to calm down your heart, that was beating incredibly fast inside your chest. 

It had been like that ever since the moment Alfred had gone to your chambers, to tell you that he had made a decision regarding the Northmen and that he had a plan. He knew what to do. Although in fear, you trusted your brother. More than anything or anyone in the whole world. 

And also, your grandfather had prepared him to make tough decisions like that one. He had given Alfred his every ruling knowledge, the wisdom of a great King. If someone could ensure your family prevailed, that person was Alfred. 

"I am aware of who you are" Alfred's voice filled the great hall. On the throne, with Bishop Heahmund standing by his side he looked a lot like Ecbert, when he used to make announcements with Bishop Edmund's Christian council. "I'm not foolish enough to not recognize your potential for my kingdom" just like you, he ran his eyes through the four of the Northmen as he spoke. Not in threat, but respect. "If you were willing to fight with us against the armies of your countrymen"

After hearing your twin brother's words, the men who was closest to where you were standing, Ubbe, the son of Ragnar, smiled and looked at the ground with a silent laugh escaping his lips. That disturbed you, made you feel even more worried about what Alfred would try to do, what agreement he would propose to them. 

As if he had sensed your intense stare, the man, Ubbe, turned his head slightly and fixed his eyes right back at yours, in retribution for your own gaze. His eyes were blue. So deeply blue. 

"We may" Bjorn Ironside spoke for the first time at the other edge of the group and that broke the eye contact you and his brother were exchanging. You swallowed hard because of how nervous that look had made you feel. "On the condition, that you allow us to settle in the part of East Anglia King Ecbert gave to us" 

Aethelred huffed, and you wished to hit him for that, having a second reason to apologize for afterwards. Bjorn Ironside's tone was already threatening enough and worthy of caution. You all did not need him to think he was being disrespected. 

Luckily enough, the Northmen did not notice that. 

"I have every intention of honoring my grandfather's pledges" Alfred made that very clear to the blond man, clenching at the throne's arms like they were his support. You admired him. To have such coldness and calmness to deal with the same people who had killed thousands of Englishmen before, that was something worthy of admiration. "But first you must demonstrate your worth and your loyalty to our cause in battle" 

Exactly like Ubbe had done before, Bjorn Ironside laughed and looked down at his feet, licking his lips in something that came close to amusement. Again, it made you worried. More than you already were. If they did not accept the deal Alfred was offering, their fate would be prison or death. And even though the sons of Ragnar were at war, you doubted that absolutely no one would seek revenge for them. That was the way with them. 

"We have the legal right to that land" Bjorn raised his eyes again and they pierced Alfred like blades, such was the ferocity in them. 

You knew what your grandfather had done in the past to his people. How he had killed all the people in the settlement he had gave them to live in peace. How he betrayed Ragnar and Lagertha's, the older woman who now stood in that hall, trust. You knew that in the verge of his death, your grandfather was not proud of that decision. Perhaps he did not regret it, but he for sure resented it. So, as much as it cost you to admit, you understood Bjorn Ironside's clear doubt in your brother's words. 

"We accept your offer" Lagertha surprised everyone by saying it. 

Instantly all the eyes in the hall were on her. Bjorn Ironside and Ubbe turned their heads to her and Bjorn mostly, seemed angry by her jumping to decisions, especially one that seemed too reckless as to trust again, a King of Wessex. And although they clearly did not agree with her, both of the men did not argue and she did not pay them any attention. She made the decision and they accepted it. You could not help but admire her determination and influence over them. 

"I am glad" Alfred sighted, in relief. You knew very much your brother was not someone who supported violence or the wrongs of people in the past. Although he had been raised by your grandfather, he was not Ecbert. He would not make the same mistakes or break his promises. And although you did resent Ragnar's sons for your grandfather's death, you felt relief as well for that deal. They had wanted to avenge their father, that you could understand. But still, the pain of your loss made it difficult to acknowledge it out loud. "It was Bishop Heahmund who proposed this solution which seemed to me wise" 

Slowly and respectfully, Heahmund turned his head a bit and nodded in Lagertha's direction, a sign of respect and duty. She did the same to him. And even though their movements were stern and cold, you could swear you saw a spark in both of their eyes. Something hidden there, carefully. 

"So" Alfred regained his speech and that made you stop paying attention to the woman and the Bishop. "As long as we are allies and friends you are free to use the royal villa as you wish" at the back of the hall, you saw some of the Lords who were a part of the Witan, exchanging horrified looks. "My servants are also your servants. My kitchens and cellars are there for your use. I believe you have two young children with you" 

That, made you turn your head completely and focus on your twin. He had not told you about that. The thought of young children in the cells of the palace, cold and hungry, made your stomach twist and shame take the whole of your being. 

The other woman, the one who had not spoken at all since they had been brought before the King, nodded her head confirming his words. Instantly, for the look in her eyes, you knew she was the children's mother. 

"Let us have a care for them also" Alfred stated and the woman's face seemed to light up gratefully like she had just received the best news in the world. 

"Thank you, Lord King" she said with the utter most respect. 

Alfred turned his head to the corner of the room and with one of his hands, made a sign for one of the guards to step forward. "We have fought against you and now we shall fight together, with you" he said as the guard started to take out the Northmen's chains and release them. "I know my grandfather King Ecbert would approve for I know the love he bore King Ragnar" 

At your grandfather's mention, you could not help but feel a sharp emotion run through your whole being. Your eyes got blurry and a tear streamed down your face. Your mother looked at you discretely but did not say a word, just smiled tenderly. You looked down at your feet and cleaned the tear with your fingertips, taking a deep breath to regain your posture. When you looked up, you saw that Ubbe was looking at you again. He had clearly seen you crying and it angered you. 

You did not want to seem weak in front of them. 

Without any other words, the Northmen were dismissed and left the great hall. Alfred watched them leave, getting up from his throne and taking a few steps forward. All the eyes were on him. 

"Can I trust them?" Alfred asked as soon as the Northmen left the hall and the doors were closed behind them. 

"You can trust Lagertha" the Bishop answered almost instantly, because he knew the question had been made to him. 

Alfred nodded and started to walk away. Before he could though, Heahmund called for him to solve one more matter. As they discussed it, you felt your mind slip further away by every instant passed. 

"If you would excuse me, my King" you bowed to your brother and only after he nodded, giving you permission to leave, you turned away and did so. 

  ─━─━─「⊱✠⊰」─━━─━─━─「⊱✠⊰━─━─

You walked through the corridors of the palace, one long corridor after the other, looking for Alfred. You had just met his soon to be wife and she seemed to be a good person, so it gave you some joy. At your mother's request, you had the responsibility to take Alfred to meet her as soon as possible. 

You had already searched his chambers and others rooms, but did not have any luck. So, your feet got you to the corridor on the south side of the palace, which lead to a room you knew Alfred liked to be in sometimes. The view from the windows calmed him, he always said. 

"Brother, are you here?" you opened the doors and entered the room. As soon as you did so, you regretted it. Alfred was there, but not alone. Bjorn Ironside and Ubbe were with him and the tension in there was anything but calm. All their eyes fell upon you and you sighted for your own stupidity. You should have assumed he would be settling matters with them regarding the new alliance. "I am sorry to interrupt"

"(Y/N), what is it?" Alfred interrupted the matter to give you attention. To him, there was nothing more important than you. 

"The Lady is here" you said and he understood of whom you were talking about. Ubbe and Bjorn Ironside just stayed silent, both of them with their eyes still on you. You did not stare back to any of them. 

"If you just wait for a moment, sister, I will accompany you and go meet her" he suggested and pointed to an empty chair on the other side of the table, across from him. You nodded and just when you sat down at that chair, he looked at Ubbe. "Please, continue" 

It took a moment for the son of Ragnar to speak and risking a quick glance, you saw that he was looking at you. As soon as your eyes met his though, he averted his quickly like you were intimidating. That made you frown. 

"Now, you are the King" Ubbe slapped Alfred in the arm with a forced smile on his lips and walked towards a near smaller table, grabbed a writing quill and ink and placed it in front of Alfred, next to a document you assumed to be the one that 'proved' the Northmen's claim to East Anglia's lands. You knew that was a lie, also. Your grandfather had already given the crown to your father, Aethelwulf, when he signed the document and therefore, had no legal right to give them those lands. "So, you can sign it over to us and you can grant us those lands right now"

You noticed how Alfred sighted heavily. "In theory, yes, I could" 

"What does that mean?" Bjorn Ironside raised his hands in the air, exasperated. You had to admit that he scared you. A simple word said in a higher tone by him made your heart beat faster. 

Alfred placed one of his elbows on the table and leaned towards the blond. "There are important people here who do not want me to grant lands to those who in the past, have attacked and raided us"

"So why would we fight for you when everything you say is just a lie?" Ubbe placed his hands on the table between his brother and Alfred, the expression on his face made you wish to tell your brother to have caution. 

"I am not lying" Alfred turned to him with a expression as serious as the Northmen's. "I am being more honest with you than you have any right to expect!" he looked at Bjorn and then back at Ubbe. He seemed so strong, facing the older men as an equal in strength, that you felt a burst of proud run through you. "You have thrown yourself upon my mercy. So, do not presume anymore upon my charity" he got up from his chair and you instantly did the same. "When I can, I will grant you that land. In the meantime, I must go and meet my future wife" 

So together, you and Alfred left the room. The both of you could sense the Northmen's eyes burning holes in your backs. 

 ─━─━━─「⊱✠⊰」─━━─━─「⊱✠⊰」─━─━─

"I think what troubles Bjorn Ironside the most is that he lost the war against his younger brothers" with arms crossed over your chest and your back against the wall behind you, yours eyes were on the ground beneath your feet as you thought deeply about the last few days where everything had changed. 

"Yes, I can see that. But I suppose we cannot blame him for having suspicions about us. Our grandfather betrayed them in the past" Alfred had his eyes sat on the fireplace, thoughts lost in the flames. "I really wish this alliance to work, my dear sister" 

"Me too" you said but noticed that Alfred had fixed his eyes on your face and searched for something hidden in there. "What is it?" 

"I thought you would not want them here. Because of grandfather and what the sons of Ragnar did. Honestly, I wondered if you would support Aethelred if he suggested we should punish them" he admitted, and the supposition made you shrug. 

"I thought about it" the fire, crackling, was the second sound in the room behind your voice. You could feel the cold of stones in your back through the thin cloth of your dress. "But our grandfather was not perfect like I thought when we were just children. He made mistakes. He should not have handed Ragnar Lothbrok to King Aelle. He should not have killed those poeple in the settlement he promised to leave in peace. How can I blame Ragnar's sons for seeking revenge for such things?"

"I am glad you think so. I share your opinion on the matter and that is why I wanted you to be here, not mother or our brother" Alfred opened up a smile to you. 

His statement made you frown. "Why would you want me to be here?" 

"We are expecting a visitor right now. I sent one of my men to bring him here. You are very wise, my sister, so I will need to hear your advice on this as much as he wil" Alfred's eyes went back to the flames. 

"What visitor, Alfred?" 

Before he could answer, the doors of the room were opened and Ubbe walked in, seeming unsure if he should keep on walking or not. He looked around, saw no one but you and your brother and the confusion and uncertainty on his face seemed to grow by the instant. 

But he walked towards you both anyway, stood a few feet away as Alfred turned around and like you, placed your eyes on the Northmen. You found yourself struggling to look away from the son of Ragnar. Again. 

During the earlier feast, your eyes had met his many times, for no reason at all. When you would look, he would already be looking. When you were looking and he would notice, you turned away quickly to try to distract yourself. There was just something about him. He was not like Bjorn Ironside, with all his anger. Nor like Ivar, whom you had met when you were just a little girl. There was something different and intriguing about him. Captivating, even. Not that it did make you trust him, though. 

"You asked to see me" he frowned at Alfred, joining his hands in the front of his body casually. 

"Yes" Alfred quickly agreed. "Please, sit" he pulled the chair at the table a little back and motioned for Ubbe to sit. Still suspicious, the Northmen did not move, just sighted. Alfred accepted the defeat by clearing his throat. "Some wine?" he poured some into a cup and helding it in hand, turned back at Ubbe. You just stayed still and waited as you did not know what was happening. "I think your brother Bjorn has set his heart against me"

"He feels..." Ubbe started, thinking about it for a moment. Then shrugged. "betrayed" 

"I understand that. But what can I do? It was not of my doing" Alfred averted his eyes for a moment and sighted. "And for the time being it is not easy for me to grant you those lands. Many are against it"

"So what are we supposed to do?" Ubbe questioned, still not seeming to see the point of that private reunion of the three of you. 

"A consilium" you spoke, having finally understood where Alfred was going with that sudden meeting. It made sense. He knew that alone, against the two of you, Ubbe would more easily see reason. Ubbe's eyes were on you in that moment, and your arms fell to the sides of your body graciously as you walked closer to the both of them. "You could publicly renounce your pagan gods and be baptized as a christian" 

Ubbe seemed shocked, by the way his gaze kept holding yours until the point he averted his eyes and sighted. "I can't imagine Bjorn would ever agree to that" he turned away to leave, but Alfred stopped him. 

"I am not talking about Bjorn, but about you" Alfred's tone was stern enough to make Ubbe turn back around and stare at the both of you. Motioning for the wine, he came closer. Alfred poured a second and third cup. One he gave to Ubbe and the other, to you. "You do that for me, Ubbe, and a part of my burden is lifted. Ragnar talked to me and my sister when we were children. He talked about your people and my people sharing the land"

"And we think that of all of his sons, you are the closest to him" you said and you saw Ubbe swallow hard, as if the comparison made him proud about himself. 

Alfred nodded in agreement to your words. "He told our grandfather that he no longer believed in your gods"

The expression in Ubbe's face changed, and he raised his cup in the air and towards your brother's face. "That is not true" 

"Our grandfather told us everything" you spoke again, wanting to take that dangerous attention away from Alfred. "He wanted to prepare us, especially my brother, for times such as this" as the words left your mouth Ubbe put the cup down, and a calmer expression took a hold of his features. "He loved your father, we know that. Your father's death broke him" 

"Destroyed him" Alfred completed and in that moment as in many others, you two were working in perfect sinchrony. 

Ubbe took a deep breath and leaving his cup at the table, got up and came closer to Alfred and stared deep into his eyes. Afterwards, he did the same thing to you. Stepped so close you could almost feel his hot breath on your skin. But you did not look away or step back, no. You looked up to meet his eyes and held his gaze for as long as he wished to. 

"I will need time" he finally stepped back, and only then you allowed yourself to breathe again. Your heart was racing inside your chest like the most scared of horses. "to think about what you have told me"

"Of course. And (Y/N), please will you take Ubbe to the chambers the servants have prepared for him and his people?" Alfred suggested and it surprised both you and the son of Ragnar a lot. Your bother smiled reassuringly at you, he had indeed, told you earlier where he would place the small group of the Northmen. And then, he turned to Ubbe. "Your wife Torvi and the others will already be there, I also asked for some extra food to be delivered, for the children" 

"Thank you" Ubbe motioned his head towards Alfred to show his gratitude, then turned to you. "My Lady" it was the first time he spoke directly to you and the respectful tone of his voice, actually made you give him a little smile. 

"Please, follow me" you took the front and walked out of the room, Ubbe following you closely behind.

Once in the corridors, you two walked side by side in completele silence. Honestly, you did not know what you could say. You were certain Alfred had made you do this because he wanted you to see if Ubbe would probably accept the consilium, or if he would deny it. You had always been good in reading people. But still... how should you question such a man? 

"Can I trust Alfred's word?" Ubbe said, speaking so suddenly that you stopped walking in surprise. The torches lit the corridor just enough to cast shadows on his face and when he also stopped walking and turned to fix his gaze on you, you suddenly realized that you two were completely alone in there. Just you and him. 

"Yes, of course" you stated, surprised by the sudden question. You thought the way to his chambers was going to be totally made in silence. 

You motioned to start walking again, but he stepped in your way, keeping you from going. Before you could say anything, the Northman's hands were closed around your forearms. Your eyes widened, but you were so shocked that no words left your mouth. His grip was not tight or bruising. It was almost gentle, as his fingetips just laid in your dress, not clenched at it. 

Holding you, Ubbe got closer and closer until your chests were almost touching. He looked down at you, as you had to look up to meet his eyes. There was a real question in his expression, hesitation that he seemed to wish to let go. "King Ecbert said my father could trust him and he was lying. So I am asking you, my Lady, if I can trust Alfred. If I do this, become a Christian, will he grant me those lands and let my people live in peace?"

"My brother is not my grandfather" you said a few moments later, when you finally were able to regain your voice. His proximity gave you chills. You saw the doubt in his eyes. "I promise you, this settlement will not end as the other did"

He must have seen the honesty in your expression. The urgency in your voice. His hands slowly let go of your arms and for some reason you missed the warmth of his hands upon your dress.

You did not exchange more words, you just led the way to his chambers and wished him and his family a goodnight of sleep.

In your chambers, later, you felt extremely tired.

Before you fell asleep, the last thing you thought about were Ubbe's eyes. Intense blue eyes. So alive, so captivating.

Those ocean eyes.

[tiffdawg]

So, chapter 17. I am soooo proud of these two and how far they've come I can't even properly express it.

“I didn’t know if I would last the first week of classes let alone the first month.” This part honestly feels like a "how it started vs how it's going" meme. In a good way! Like, I remember EarlyChapters!Javi who had no idea of how to do his job, and look at him now 🥺🥺

And the casual intimacy of all their interactions!! These two know each other SO intimately! They are incredibly comfortable around one another and it's a joy to read.

“He’d thought he was going back home to Texas, but the truth was he felt more at home now just by being with you. “Yeah, I think you could.” Me? Dead? More likely than you think.

“Because you won’t like me, his traitorous brain supplied.” Okay, I need an honest conversation about his feelings of slight inadequacy and shame STAT. In all seriousness though, I do love how you manage to capture the duality that is Javier Peña: a confident badass, yes, but also a broken person who's definitely seen too much.

"Fuck. She’s brilliant."🥺🥺🥺. He's so in awe of her intelligence 🥺🥺. I'm emotional right now, don't touch me.

“I think I–” FINISH THAT PHRASE YOU COWARD! (still emotional)

"Your heart belonged to Javier Peña. You loved him. Truly, deeply loved him." *STILL EMOTIONAL*

I have obviously lost the ability to form coherent sentences, but know that this fic is still one of my favorites. Its original premise, masterful development make for a breathtaking piece, and I could never praise you enough for the skill you demonstrated in crafting Javi and Reader's relationship. The slow transition from mistrust to respect to friendship to something more is just... *chef's kiss*. Thank you, and have a nice day ~ 🍪

Dear sweet cookie anon, I held on to this for quite some time because it made me smile every time I read it 💗 Thank you so much for taking the time to send such a thoughtful message. I absolutely love seeing which parts resonate with readers and your little comments always kill me in the best way 💗 I hope that you’re having a wonderful day my love!!

^ Live footage of me giving all my love to you

[imagine-that-haikyuu]

i feel like this is cheating but i can't help it, would it be possible to request (short, because i'm not an asshole) character analyses from you in the future? if not no worries, i'm just such a sucker for meta and i really like your style haha. i'll try to be specific so you'll have an easier time writing it. i mean it's basically headcanons without the head so it's just... canon. yeah that was not the smartest sentence i've ever written and i'm not proud of it sorry

i know i said that i’d do tsukki for this meta, but i started rambling about keishin in chapter 255 in a post for the other blog and halfway through writing it, i thought it would just best for this. also because you asked for something short and the tsukki meta will be long. since we haven’t seen as much development from everyone’s favorite coach as we have from tsukki, it seemed like a good opportunity to highlight some subtle hints that furudate-sensei’s been giving us that something is in the works

and also for me to ramble about my husband

so that being said, there are spoilers past season 3 of the anime since this is about the latest chapter, 255

if you like what i do and want to show your support, consider supporting me on ko-fi!

- admin rachel lauren

Never underestimate my ability to hyperfocus on Keishin in every chapter, but chapter 255 has me beginning to think we’re going to get some development from him in some capacity, and perhaps regarding his relationship with his grandpa.

I’ll never stop talking about how Furudate-sensei is a very smart in crafting their stories and bringing what may seem like minor details or throwaway lines to attention again many chapters later, so I think it might be fair to assume that some parts of 255 are hinting at something important to come for Keishin. Even if this ends up being nothing more than speculation on my part, it’s still something that might be interesting to think about for the rest of the Nationals arc.

Right after using Karasuno’s signature weapon against them, Inarizaki rubs salt into the wound by reading Kageyama and successfully blocking Hinata. Like the great coach that he's proving himself time and time again to be, Keishin of course is going to try and ensure that this doesn’t get to them and lead to mistakes later on.

Something any good coach would say to his team, right? Though, in retrospect, I’m not entirely sure this was directed just at Hinata and Kageyama, but also to himself. Shimada and Takinoue’s comments from the next page are what tipped this off as a possibility for me:

This chapter contained very little comedy (as expected given what’s happening in the match at this time), but this would have been the time for sensei to demonstrate exactly what Takinoue is saying here. We already got something similar from Daichi after Oikawa’s first serve in the second official match against Seijou.Given that it’s been a very long time since that chapter was published, it would have been fine to pull that gag again without risking it feeling cheap or stale. The fact that sensei didn’t go down that route is an interesting choice, and even more so that they felt the need to have Shimada and Takinoue note this for the reader. If it wasn’t going to be important at some point, it would have never been mentioned. I say this with confidence because it happens again and again with other characters in this series. Furudate-sensei has an incredible knack for setting up important plot points by making them seemingly minor details far before they’re even needed. (Whether or not they include these things knowing they’re going to utilize it later or including it and realizing later that it can be incorporated into the story is beside the point. It doesn’t matter when those things come to a writer so much as if the writer can and does find/create an appropriate time to remind the readers of it).

Regardless, I’d say this highlights very well how much Keishin has grown as coach just in the three months since the Miyagi prefecture finals, let alone from when he first started prior to the Nekoma practice match. He was very much a rookie coach in the beginning; he’d show his frustration and helplessness through a bit of a temper whenever the boys were backed into a corner and he couldn’t immediately think of a solution.

Now, we’re getting some wonderful examples of how differently he’s handling his position as a coach. He’s spending more of his free time researching and strategizing not only to minimize the anxiety from not knowing exactly what a powerful opponent is capable of, but also to minimize the anxiety from not knowing how to combat them. Chapter 253 gave us this gem:

And in earlier chapters right before Nationals, (I don’t remember which chapters exactly and I don’t think screenshots are entirely necessary for them anyway) there are very sweet moments where he instills confidence in Kinoshita regarding his serves and Kageyama’s abilities as a setter among other things. More recently, Asahi’s flashback in 254 really drives this point home.

But I digress. Back to the “calm on the outside” panels from 255. Unlike before, we see Keishin not lose his cool outwardly. It’s safe to say that he’s learned that a team’s morale can hinder on how their coach is feeling. While he may have been outwardly worried in the past during time-outs, one of the boys was there to assure everyone that things were going to be okay. But he can’t rely on that happening every time. While the boys are fantastic at motivating themselves and their teammates, they’re still high school students: they’re going to look to adults they trust for guidance in times of doubt. Keishin becoming a more mature coach is absolutely necessary for Karasuno to hold it together on the national stage. 

I’d argue that a good part of this, too, comes from the fact that Ikkei is in the hospital again at this point in the manga. Given that he seems relatively close to his grandpa--however odd it may be to have your relationship with your grandfather be a rivalry--this is probably weighing on Keishin enough to affect his disposition in the middle of a match. Chapter 247 has a very ominous moment which makes me believe that Ikkei is a huge component in Keishin trying to dry behind his ears a little while at Nationals.

We know he’s talking about Karasuno here, but having that blank, black panel show up right after he learns from a relative informing that Ikkei’s condition is not getting better is incredibly unsettling. His grandfather as his motivation before was markedly immature, with Ikkei constantly taking jabs at his grandson and Keishin reacting to them mostly out of mild contempt and because of his competitive spirit. Now, it’s’ easy to see that this shift in tone also shifts the nature of Ikkei as his motivation. It’s less of a matter of wanting to beat his grandpa and more so wanting to continue the legacy his grandfather left before his retirement, that his grandfather can look at Karasuno and know that they’re in capable hands, and that he is a coach worthy of leading a team at the national level. And god forbid the man dies--because sports manga aren’t immune to character deaths (Area no Kishi, anyone?)--Keishin would certainly want his grandfather to pass being proud of him and of Karasuno.

Keishin can only be a proxy for sensei to explain strategy to the readers for so long. I think Shimada and Takinoue are better suited for that because they’re spectators as much as the readers are. While a flashback to the Neighborhood Association trio’s time in high school would be ill-timed at this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if we got a different type of development for Keishin in the coming months. I’d be more surprised if we didn’t, considering what I mentioned earlier about sensei’s storytelling style. If it doesn’t happen now, it’ll happen eventually. And if not I’m flying to Japan and personally giving sensei an earful after I thank them first.