#bruh I just need to stop fucking worrying and know I'll ALWAYS GET WHAT I WANT OMGSKDSKDHSJSJ

[safesthaveninexistence]

Omgomgomomgomgofmggogmfofmgofflgmgofofmf IMA CRY! I just woke up to two emails from two different modeling runway shows that I really wanted to be a part of SAYING THEY FUCKING ACCEPTED ME AS A RUNWAY MODEL.. PMGGPGMOGMFLALSIDHSJALSJDBSKAKZHZHkzjxhxg

[axailslink]

Baby Take A Break

Riri Williams x poc FEM reader

Summary: you have been studying really hard this past week for an upcoming exam and Riri tries her best to help.

The rattling of your fan is the only thing keeping you awake right now as the words on your laptop screen become jumbled scribbles. Riri who has been watching you for the past hour finally gives in and walks to your bed and closes your lap top "you're tired let's take a break maybe go get something to eat?" You roll on your side letting your pajama shorts ride up as your gaze meets hers "or we could stay in and cook some ramen you know broke college kid shit" you smile at her and pull her to you by her shirt "I really need some help on this assignment we can wait another hour to eat just help me please before my fucking brain blows up" she climbs on your bed and sits next to you opening the laptop back up as it loads back on she watches you as you stretch your arms up causing your cropped tank to rise just above the bottom of your breast.

C'mon Riri this is not the time but she really looks so good when she's all tired and stressed the way her brows furrow and her nose scrunches up it's kind of cute it's always been cute it's tempting too. You've been sitting staring at the laptop screen for who knows how long. You turn your attention towards Riri she's just staring at you all heart eyed "Riri you said you'd help me the laptops been on for two minutes" you groan patting her arm she nods and slowly takes her gaze off of you returning to the laptop but not before she takes a quick screenshot in her mind. "Okay so it looks like we've got...oh you gone fail" you look at her with all seriousness in your face not in the mood for her jokes you push her into the wall "bruh if you not gone help gone on somewhere! I'm stressing and you sitting here playing I'm not playing Ri I seriously don't know what to fucking do I'm on the verge of tears at this point this shits annoying."

Riri immediately softens her facial expression and pull you into her "no don't say that I'm sorry I was just fucking around I'll help for real but for real you shouldn't constantly stress about this it'll only make it harder to make sense of it. So let's take a break I have the perfect idea." Riri jumps from her bed and runs back to her own "dollar ice creams right now I know you might not feel like it but you'd never turn down free ice cream would you?" You smile at her but look back at the laptop contemplating your choices "ahtah stop no don't worry about that you have a week until that test comes-" she grabs your hand and gently tugs on it "so right now let's go get you that ice cream you so lovingly deserve c'mon what do you say? I'm buying" she reminds you and you nod "okay we can get ice cream but afterwards you seriously have to help me" Riri laughs "I am helping by distracting you then we gone work then afterwards we gone have some us time" you look at her and laugh taking in all of her goofiness.

"Us time?" She nods "you keep tryna speak that into existence?" You ask pulling yourself out of bed and wrapping your arms around her waist she nods "yes we deserve it just some time between me and you and no assignments for at least an hour baby that's a dream."

You nod and look down at her "other than that break want to know what else I'm craving?" Riri cocks her head "don't say it because if you do we ain't gonna go get no ice cream I'll be craving a different type of ice cream." you roll your eyes "you are so childish that is so damn childish" Riri shrugs and pull you into a kiss "you knew this already I think I'm the funniest person in the world those are your words by the way."

[skinni-girls-eat-books]

10/29/23

He almost stopped talking to me today. He said I am making him feel guilty for continuing to flirt with me. I was just making him feel bad because he is not ready yet.

I just need to be his friend right now, not his bitter ex. He wants me as his friend and says he can still see us together in the future. I am not going to give up, he tried to tell me to move on but I don't think he means it.

He said in the future he would give me another chance and believes I could change. He just wants to know if he is capable of changing. He says he wants more privacy in his life but then he also says he doesn't post her bc he's afraid it will hurt me. He also said the nut thing is still true and that they didn't do it, but ig he could be lying, at least he's being nice about it now.

He says he's not supposed to be talking to me still but that he cares about me and wants to. I love him so much and told him about how I feel like I always need to tell him because you never know what could happen in a day. But that worry is part of my anxiety.

He's gotten help and gotten better and now I'm the one crumbling mentally and just leaning on him too much. He knows how much he was a burden before. He says I stressed him out when he was here and now I stress him out when he's not even here anymore. I feel dumb for bringing up the toys and now that's probably a sour thing. Idk what to think. He's still considerably messed up and so am I.

He says he just wishes I had paid more attention to him and given him more little times. I don't know why it felt like I gave him everything I had but it's not about how I feel, it's about how he felt/ saw/ interpreted things.

I can't keep giving him fuel to throw back at me, even if I want to say something questionable I just have to bite my tongue because I don't want him to think of me negatively. I wish I was doing better but I'm not. Just need to focus on what is good.

Edit: also the fact that he called himself a man child lol that has never crossed my lips but he said it. He sees that his "randomness" is not always practical and said that most of the time it's childish things. He talked about how he has random ideas but doesn't say anything bc he doesn't have a penny to his name so he knows someone else would just end up paying for it. I wonder if this ever crossed his mind when we were together bc he would always say things and I would get frustrated when it just always became me paying for everything and it was stressful. Stressful because when I didn't have the money or didn't want to particularly spend it on whatever he was saying, it would only cause friction and I don't know why he couldn't see it from my pov.

Also if we ever get back together, he loves to say that I didn't make time for him to take me on dates when he had money/ got paid..... Boy has no money saving skills at all he couldn't even save the money for a few days until I was free.... Wtf but just saying if we ever get back together he better be ready to live up to that. When he gets paid I'll be hitting him up for sure since he said that's always what he wanted to do..... Bruh but whatever lol. This shit is mind boggling but once again, this is how he interpreted things so I can't change how he viewed the situation, especially after I already told him that makes so sense literally.... It's called planning a date. Spontaneous is fun but it's just not always practical and I mean really once you have kids and stuff, it gets even less practical but again....... whatever.

One day at a time... he knows how you feel about him so don't need to continually bring it up. In fact don't bring it up for at least one week.

- Don't ask "when" anything he doesn't fucking know

- Don't say anything about her because I AM not going to change his mind lol,,, she can do that herself,,, be patient. It might take a year or two but she's gonna see he's something else.

- So let's say he changes and she really gets the better version... be patient you're in this for the long run queen.

(But also fuck him for not changing for you because you are actually a fucking queen to die for so fuck him, get cheated on bitch)

- Stop always saying I wish it was me, he knows. Use this sparingly, bc sometimes you don't wish it was you lmao.

- "Her parents love me" ...... um yeah bc you're actually stable now congrats you're doing the bare minimum finally ffs. Instead of literally causing drama at every fucking event. Literally still talking about having beef w Claude like just try not to?? Jfc my family is not just a bunch of fucking monsters gd you'd rather be friends with someone you just said treats women like shit, gotcha... wtf talk about fake at least my parents were genuine assholes like come on which do you want??

- Ok this is a lot better than texting him and I should really do this more often bc I can really just let loose. This journaling shit will be good for me, I just need to stick to it ❤️ I can do my roller coaster of emotions without a live audience 😂

[babydinojojo]

Day 3/ Entry 3

Okay... maybe I've gotten way too mad at myself last night. I can't really sleep right now so i guess Imma write in here for a bit and then i'm gonna go back to sleep.

Okay forget what i said about the google doc, I will try my absolute best to remember to tell her shit alright, she still loves you Jordan you just need to let go sometimes yk. Okay anyway the Class 700 came out for Train Sim World 3 today so Im gonna be checking that out today. I wonder what skin i should Make for minecraft cause i need something completely original and no i don't wanna use AI cause that's gonna be the death of us Istfg, I don't know it's just i get a mega bad feeling even when i see AI chatbots and shit like they just make me scared for some reason and the fact that its ramping up faster and faster everyday makes me worry about the future... I DON'T WANNA DIE BY A ROBOT, I JUST WANNA LIVE A FULL LIFE AND SEE MY GF KRISY AND HAVE A LIFE WITH HER, NOT JUST DIE BY SOME DAMN ROBOT. Anyway tho I have an off day today surprsingly oh wait i forgot that i didnt have work today and i thought i overslept ;-; bruh, I keep forgetting shit. Which brings me to my next topic

I think i finally might know why i keep forgetting things, I just got way too much going on in the background to remember, I have a short attention span so it's probably because work is making me do more and more shit. Except the past two work days, where we did ABSOLUTELY nothing after my lunch break. That's time where I could have been texting Krisy and spending time with her, but its whatever tho. Oh yea funny story tho from Yesterday lol, Soooo i was on an R62A 6 Train right, and i was riding the City Hall Loop and everything went all and according to plan until we skipped the Fucking Uptown Platform, it went non-stop and i was lowkey panicking cause yea i thought i was on an Out of Service dehead, thankfully we stopped at Canal street, Yea im not gonna be doing the loop after that, speaking of the 6 Train, them R62As are extremely underrated as fuck, for trains that started on the 6 as Single units and then ended up on the 7 and then came back in 2015-2016, they are pretty fast and underrated for a local train.

While we are on the topic of my gf, I think i found some places I would like to show her around

-Brooklyn Bridge Park/Pier

-Barnes and Nobles in Downtown Brooklyn

-Ride around the City Hall Loop and show her the Abandoned City Hall Station which looks absolutely amazing to this day

-Dave and Busters TSQ/Gateway Mall

-Queens Center Mall

Okay yea that's a good list and a good start

Speaking of last night, like I said before i got way WAY too mad at myself last night. Damn.. I never realized how hard I am on myself especially for her. Okay I realize that i need to sometimes let things go, I can't be to hard on myself cause thats gonna end up destroying my confidence and make me start self harming, hasnt happened yet but still, i just gotta breath and chill the fuck out.

On a side note tho, im not sure why but for some reason i have a massive pet peeve when someone uses "Ok" or "K" or "Mk" instead of just saying "Okay" or "Alright. I don't know its just "Ok" or "K" Just seem way more cold and distant, and no in my opinion are not the goddamn same as "Okay"/"Alr"/"Kay"/"M'kay" Its just fucking not the same, like bro next person who "Ok" or "K" me im gonna end up getting pissed at them. Okay fine i'll admit i had way too many people, and no before you ask Krisy is not apart of those people, but still too many people try to pull that dry shit and it always send the goddamn wrong message cause i end up thinking something is the goddamn matter with them, like i said "Ok" and "K" are NOT the same as "Okay" and "Kay" or "Alright"/"Alr"

Well that's all i got for now, lets see where the day takes us shall we

[restlesstheoryqfab]

text | LivQuinn

Liv: I was just looking back in my camera roll and found a picture of us in the dungeon :sweat smile emoji: :sweat smile emoji:

Quinn: oh God

Liv: We looked so rough LOL

Quinn: I'm sure we did

Liv: How are you?

Liv: Did I see somewhere your tour ended?

Liv: You going back to California?

Quinn: m'fine

Quinn: That it did.

Quinn: Nah. Headed back to Boston.

Liv: Oh! So I’ll get to see you then??

Liv: When will you be around?

Liv: It’s been ages

Quinn: Yup

Quinn: Got plans Monday, presumably I'll be required to make an appearance at Fran's on Tuesday, but I could probably do sometime on Tuesday?

Quinn: That it has.

Liv: That’s so far

Quinn: It's Tuesday or you wait even more.

Liv: Ugh the worst

Liv: why can’t you be around nowwwwwww

Quinn: Because I'm not

Liv: I’ll wait

Liv: Since I have to

Quinn: believe me, I'd prefer to be around

Liv: Are you close enough for me to drive to you?

Liv: The pictures were so hot!

Quinn: I'm busy.

Liv: Oh, okay. No worries

Quinn: Post tour shit is a bitch

Liv: I mean, I imagine so. So much physical and emotional work. When I was on tour it felt like we never went to bed.

Quinn: I love being on tour. I hate coming off it.

Liv: Sounds like you ate too many edibles

Quinn: I wish.

Liv: Do you want some?

Quinn: God no. Fran would kill me.

Liv: So? Edibles are basically good for you

Liv: Plus they just help you sleep

Quinn: You convince miss high and mighty of that.

Liv: Maybe she just cares about you?

Liv: Well, if you decide you want some lemme know.

Quinn: She does, but she's also anti-everything fun

Liv: Fun is relative. Different for everyone.

Liv: sounds like you need fun, grumpy

Quinn: But weed is nearly always fun, and Frannie turns up her nose at it.

Quinn: I need a fucking break is what I need.

Liv: plus how do you know Frannie hasn’t made edibles before? She definitely has.

Liv: You’re literally on break

Quinn: Is my withdrawal brain reading shit wrong or did you just say that Frannie, Francine Grace Fabray MADE edibles?!

Liv: She did! On Sunday.

Quinn: The fuck?

Liv: It’s why I have them

Quinn: You made edibles with my sister?

Quinn: god this feels like a hallucination

Liv: I did!

Liv: They’re so yummy too

Quinn: What fucking world did I faze into that my sister is making edibles?

Liv: Why does it matter?

Liv: It just means she doesn’t care if you let me bring you some

Quinn: She'll still fuckin kill me

Liv: I just wanna chill with you Fabray

Quinn: I'm probably the last fucker in Boston you really wanna hang out with.

Liv: Hey now, don’t put words in my mouth :frowning emoji:

Quinn: I'm not good company right now.

Liv: That’s okay. I can just drop cookies off?

Quinn: No. It'd be a bad idea. I don't know what adding that onto everything else would do. Would like to at least give Fran the chance to kill me.

Liv: Okay. I’ll bring some Tuesday then. How’s that?

Quinn: Sounds great. And tell whichever of the women in that house you're talking to that I know what I'm doing.

Liv: You sure about that?

Quinn: Yeah, this isn't my first rodeo.

Liv: Well they love you

Quinn: Doesn't always feel like like it. Fucking snitch.

Liv: Rather be a snitch then lose you

Quinn: I was talking about Bea. Though you're not much better.

Liv: What did she do?

Quinn: Tattled to Frannie

Liv: she is the baby

Quinn: And I told her I was fine.

Liv: Yeah, I mean drugs usually don’t equate to fine. But it’s fine.

Liv: What do you have going on Monday?

Quinn: I'm detoxing. It's fine.

Quinn: high school reunion of the horny variety, apparently

Liv: But why stop if you wanna do them so bad?

Liv: Ooooooh

Liv: Gross

Quinn: Frannie. And I only trust one guy to supply me, though after this my trust is wavering.

Quinn: Pretty little brat that I'm inclined to believe is as good with her mouth as she says.

Liv: So you stopped enough to trick her?

Liv: Hopefully she’s not lying

Quinn: If she thought I wasn't using she didn't worry.

Quinn: Pretty little song bird who also doesn't know how to shut up. So if that woman doesn't know how to put that mouth of hers to good use, well, she knows what I'll do to her.

Liv: Looks like you’re spots been blown up unfortunately

Liv: What now?

Liv: Hopefully she shuts up enough to use her mouth

Quinn: Fuck if I know.

Quinn: She likes being put in her place, I'm sure I can that mouth to do what I want it to.

Liv: Cool

Liv: sounds funnnn

Quinn: I should ask if she's gotten rid of her reindeer sweater...

Liv: LOL u joking?

Quinn: This girl wore short fucking skirts, knee high socks, and sweaters so fucking often. And no matter how much teasing and bullying occurred she wouldn't change. Even her so-called friends tried to get her to toss the fucking reindeer sweater and she just wouldn't.

Liv: Well, stubborn can be fun. I think.

Liv: My brother always wears funny bow ties. People don’t appreciate them but he does it anyways.

Quinn: Bowties I can appreciate. Unflattering sweaters with reindeer I cannot

Liv: They were unflattering even with the knee socks?

Quinn: From ankle to waist she was perfect. Great legs, an amazing ass. And then BOOM reindeer

Liv: LOL you’ll have to let me know what she wears cause I’m big curious

Quinn: Hopefully not much. But yeah, I'll let you know

Liv: She shows up naked. Could you imagine :laughing cat emoji:

Quinn: If she wasn't meeting in public first I am not entirely sure I'd complain.

Liv: Why public if you know each other?

Quinn: Because it's been 11 years since high school and I'm not stupid enough to give someone I barely know my address?

Liv: Did she know your address back then? :winking emoji:

Quinn: No. My father would have had a conniption if I even entertained the idea of being acquainted with her.

Liv: Ohhhhhh

Liv: Romeo and Juliet vibes :laughing cat emoji: :laughing cat emoji: laughing cat emoji:

Quinn: I wanted nothing to do with her back then. Except when I could get her angry enough to storm off so I could watch her go.

Liv: So you kinda wanted something to do with her

Quinn: I wanted less to do with her than she wanted to do with me.

Liv: Omg was she in love with you

Quinn: She wanted me to fuck her in the locker room. Apparently on multiple occasions.

Liv: Jesus

Liv: that’s hot

Quinn: Spanking included

Liv: Well then

Quinn: Mmhmm

Liv: Well hopefully she’s just horny for you and not obsessed with you

Quinn: I've had worse people obsessed with me

Liv: Fair enough.

Liv: So what are you going to make her do?

Quinn: Haven't decided yet.

Liv: No fair

Quinn: I mean, she's given me so many ideas. Definitely like the idea of spanking her, getting her on her knees, not letting her up until I'm satisfied."

Liv: you could kill her between your legs and she probably wouldn’t care

Quinn: Probably

Liv: That’s a sacrifice I’d probably take too

Quinn: Is that so?

Liv: For sure

Quinn: Interesting.

Quinn: So, you and Frannie?

Liv: We’re friends because of Arin! Love that woman

Quinn: Okay, but like how are you two JUST NOW connecting? I mean, you and the queen of darkness have known each other for a while, right?

Liv: It just sort of happened, idk

Liv: the same way you spent your summers with my Blaine

Quinn: Excuse me what?

Liv: Blaine Anderson | Liv Anderson

Quinn: Bruh.

Liv: Tell me about it. I could have gotten into so many pants way sooner.

Quinn: So like, why weren't you?

Liv: You know, dads suck!

Quinn: Mood

Liv: I punched him in the face and he shipped me off to boarding school :sunglasses emoji:

Quinn: Damn, I wish

Quinn: I just write songs about mine

Liv: Mine doesn’t exist to me anymore so no songs need to be written

Liv: At least they are good!!!

Quinn: I'm sure I don't exist to him but that doesn't make the trauma and shit nonexistent

Liv: Neither does the drugs

Quinn: The drugs have very little to do with THAT bastard

Liv: Okay. My apologies.

Liv: They still don’t help trauma

Quinn: They stop the memories way more than you'd think

Liv: Doesn’t make it the way

Quinn: Yeah, well they work.

Liv: I know

Quinn: and that's the part that matters.

Quinn: so like how did you get her to make edibles?

Liv: I asked her

Quinn: What the ever loving fuck have I missed the last 9 months?

Liv: I don’t know LOL

Quinn: Neither do I.

Liv: The world just got smaller mostly.

Liv: and everyone is horny and kinky

Liv: Or both

Quinn: Both, definitely both.

Liv: Specially them Fabray girls

Quinn: Not all of us.

Liv: All of you dude

Quinn: Last a checked my not-so-closeted older sister is still in fact a sex free bitch. And as much as even I know kink isn't always sexual, Frannie might have an interested, but that definitely doesn't result in actually being willing.

Liv: An interest is enough for me to label you all kinky. That’s all.

Quinn: Okay then

Liv: And you are horny I’m sure

Quinn: nah, withdrawal sucks that shit right outta ya. Hoping I don't have to cancel Monday, honestly

Liv: omg that’d break her heart probably

Quinn: Probably

Liv: such power

Quinn: Mmhmm

Liv: if you cancel on her let’s hang out

Quinn: If I cancel on her it will be because I still feel like death

Liv: and I can’t take care of you?

Quinn: Why would you want to?

Liv: Friends take care of friends

Liv: I messaged you because I was hoping you’d let me come over to help you. It just also meant I could let Frannie know you are okay

Quinn: I'm fine, Liv, really. Just some extra shit I wasn't expecting to deal with.

Liv: You guys are so fucking frustrating holy shit

Liv: Okay. I get it. But I want to help. And I’m here for you. That’s all. You can believe it and I hope you would but I won’t force you.

Quinn: I know I am. Bea, if you know her is too. But what's frustrating about Frannie? Like, from a you perspective?

Quinn: I just don't need the help right now, okay? Go be a brat to someone who can handle it

Liv: She doesn’t take a single compliment.

Liv: I’m not being a brat I’m trying to be a friend

Quinn: Is there a reason you're trying that hard to compliment my sister?

Quinn: You're being a bratty friend.

Liv: It’s easy to?

Quinn: ... You like her don't you

Liv: We’re friends. Obviously I like her.

Quinn: Bitch, you know what I mean

Liv: I haven’t thought about it like that tbh

Liv: Maybe I do

Liv: That’s fun

Quinn: Does she know? Does she like you back? I need details bitch

Liv: You think she knows when I didn’t know?

Quinn: I don't know. Maybe? Like does she like you?

Liv: I mean she likes hanging out with me and made edibles with me

Quinn: Mmhm. And?

Liv: What do you mean and? We just chill a lot

Liv: And laugh a lot lol

Quinn: Okay. That's something. But also you're terrible at this. I'm gonna have to ask Arin. Arin knows these things.

Liv: Arin knows everything

Liv: I also don’t know anything right now outside the fact that I’m seconds from exploding

Quinn: Except how to fall in love with someone who WON'T cheat on her.

Quinn: Getting relief, I hope?

Liv: low blow

Liv: Maybe she can date Bea. Bea doesn’t know anyone but us.

Liv: Yes sooooon

Quinn: But the truth.

Quinn: Don't know how I feel about that. Though, pretty sure she had a crush on Arin when we were younger.

Quinn: oooh

Liv: I mean who didn’t have a crush on Arin? LOL

Liv: oooooh

Quinn: Frannie. And presumably Blaine.

Quinn: Who???

Liv: Wonder if Sugar did. She’s worse than anyone I know when it comes to realizing feelings LOL

Liv: Arin

Quinn: Sugar had it BAD. Like, literally got her ass beat multiple times with a book cos she refused to leave Arin alone. Now she just pretends to hate her for it.

Quinn: enjoy the queen of darkness, you both probbaly need it though like... does Frannie know?

Liv: LOLOLOLOLOLOl

Liv: Yeah, I think she knows. I mean I don’t know how she wouldn’t know.

Quinn: uh huh. and do you know if she reacted to this?

Liv: What do you mean?

Liv: I don’t know.

Liv: she said she didn’t need Arin

Quinn: I mean how did she react. Was it normal. Was it short. Did it take longer or faster than it should have.

Liv: She gets short a lot. I didn’t really note it as different

Liv: This is so much

Quinn: Well, when you have a chance, compare what everytime she's gotten short with you has in common and met me know

Liv: Quinn, I really like sex and she doesn’t

Liv: I don’t think we could ever work

Liv: it’s not that serious

Quinn: Look, I can't say why she's repulsed lord knows that's her story to tell, but she's on that site for a reason. A reason that I pray means what I think it does. Don't count her out because of her history.

Liv: I’m not counting her out. I just think you’ve got it all wrong.

Quinn: I don't think I do. But Arin will know more and I will get my answer. Just think over why she gets short with you.

Liv: Stubborn :sweat emoji:

Quinn: Fabray genetics. Running away, being attractive, a desire to be right.

Liv: can you like wait to bug arin until I’m done with her?

Quinn: You mean til she's done with you, but yeah, I'm gonna go pass out

Liv: goodnight Quinn :winking emoji:

Quinn: enjoy the queen of darkness

[zxddy-panther]

Real Love

College AU

T’challa x Black Reader

A/N: Hey guys I’m back with another story ayyye. Lol um i’m not sure if i wrote this one too well. I’ve been working on it for dayyyyys guys. I hope it’s decent. Also sorry about the spacing between paragraphs. Tumblr was saying that i reached my limit so i had to squeeze.

You pace back and forth in your college dorm nervously awaiting your best friend's presence. You needed to talk to him desperately about a topic that has been torturing you mind for a few months now. His advise was very much needed in this situation. The doorbell sounded, signaling his arrival. You ran up to the door and opened the door to your bestie of 6 years holding vanilla ice cream and some other sweet treats.

You sighed in relief, "Ugh Udaku. What would I do without you."

"Nothing. You would be practically hopeless" You laughed pushing him softly

The two of you headed to your bedroom and T'challa could already see your uneasiness. You walked with your eyes pointed towards the floor, fiddling with your fingers as you did so.

Finally reaching your room T'challa spoke on his observation. "Y/N are you alright."

You turned towards him and spoke. "Yeah I just really needed your advise on something. Um so you know Jalen right?"

T'challa rolled his eyes in disgust. He wasn't too fond of your boyfriend but never told you that because he would never intentionally hurt you like that. He just made sure that he wasn't in the same vicinity as that idiot.

"Yes. What about him?" he said in an annoyed tone

You paused for a second, trying to figure out how to say it.

"Well a few months ago he um...... actually cheated on me and-"

"He WHAT!" Tchalla exclaimed

"Yeah but" you fiddled with your thumbs some more. "He's been calling me and asking me to take him back, saying that he's really changed and all of that. I mean, should I?"

Tchalla's heart was beating 10 times faster than normal. His anger and hatred for Jalen just become more a lot stronger. He just doesn't understand why you would want him back.

"Y/N, are you hearing yourself? You know he doesn't love you."

"Ok Ok T'challa you can stop now." You murmured but he just kept going.

" Y/N, you don't deserve to be treated the way he treats you! That is not love! You need to be shown what real love-"

"T'challa! Stop." All was silent and tears began to well in your eyes. You moved across the room and turned your back towards him. "Can we not talk about this? I don't want to talk about it with you anymore."

"Ok then lets not talk." Fast footsteps was all that could be heard until you felt him slip his hands around your waist. The feeling sent a shock of electricity through your body, a foreign feeling to be exact. This was something you've never felt with Jalen and you wondered why. Once T'challa made you face him he looked at your lips enticingly and leaned into you slowly.

"Aye aye. What are yo-" . T'challa placed his hand at the back of your neck and pulled you into a passionate kiss. Your eyes fluttered shut. His soft lips massaged yours in a very slow and gracious manner. Your body was being set ablaze by his touch. Any section of his smooth skin that touched your own helped to  spark a sensation that was unexplainable. He ran his hands down your body and hugged your body close to himself, like if he didn't hold on tightly to this moment it'll disappear. The sudden movement caused you to release a small moan against his lips. Tchalla pulled away from you slowly and sighed in relief.

"Tchalla. Wha-what was that." You would have never imagined that you'd someday be kissing your best friend. T'challa stood in front of you, staring at the floor.

"Y/N.." He paused and took a deep breath. I love you a-and I'm sorry for doing that. I just couldn't help myself. I've felt this way for a long time now but I just couldn't bring myself to tell you. Everyday it became a battle within myself to confess my feelings towards you. I'm also very sorry about what I said before. I shouldn't have spoken that way to you or about Jalen."

He bent down to retrieve his book bag from the corner of your room. With a sadden spirit, he began treading towards the door. "I'll just let myself out." T'challa reached for the door knob and headed out, but not before he could get one last glimpse of your face for the last time. "Good bye Y/n.." he whispered as he shut the door.

Your heart dropped from your chest and started beating in your fingertips. You blinked several times to make sure that you were not dreaming. Emotions were running wild and thoughts were jumping off the walls. Who do you love?

5 months ago

"Jalen why the fuck is my cousin blowing your phone up with nudes and text messgaes! What the hell!" You stormed into the living room where your lazy ass boyfriend laid playing on his second phone. Jalen quickly looked up at the sound of your heavy footsteps.

"Y/N what the hell are you talking about."

"My cousinnnn is sending nudes to your phone! You dumbass. Would like to explain to me how she got your number and why-" The phone chimed alerting a new message. "Oh here's and heres a new text. Lets read it. 'I want to feel you inside me again.' AGAIN?! You fucked my cousin Jalen?!" You shoved the phone in his face.

Jalen stood up and suddenly snatched from your grasp.

"Yo what the fuck did I tell you about being on my phone bruh! Should've taken your finger print off a long time ago." Jalen growled. Your blood was boiling and the rage began to build.

"Are you kidding me right now. You fucking cheated on me with my cousin of all people and you're worried about my finger print? So you're CHEATING cheating?!" Jalen looked up at you a scoffed, a smirk spreading across his long face.

"That's it! Im done." you screamed. "After all the years we've spend together! You go and do this to me?" Tears began to sting at your eyes. You ran to your room and began to pack up your things. There was no way in hell that you were staying here another second with this idiot. The muffed sound of Jalen's footsteps followed after you.

His voice come out in a deep growl, "Where the hell do you think you're going." You stood up and turned to face him.

"I'm getting the fuck away from here. You went lower than low Jalen. Do you really expect for me to sit up under this roof with you and act as if everything is ok? Hell no! There is no way I'm going to stay and let you treat me like this. I'm leaving."

He let out a dark and sinister laugh. "No you're not"

You scoffed, "Oh yeah?  And who's gonna stop me." He stared you down as his eyes began to turn dark and before you knew it you were being lifted from the ground. Jalen had a strong grip around your torso and was persistent on keeping you in the room. "Let me go!" You kicked your legs rapidly and tried to pry his arms from your body. Your back hit the hard mattress in a matter of seconds. Jalen held your arms about your head tightly, leaving you unable to move your wrists.

"Mmm you're not going anywhere baby 'cuz you mine." He bent his head down and started licking at your neck, sucking the skin harshly. His hands ran up your shirt and felt cold against your warm flesh. He squeezed your breast and began sucking your sweet spot. The same gestures that were usually done during intimacy between the two of you used to be so pure, so full of love but now all you can feel is utter disgust and anger.

"Jalen move. I don't want to hurt you." You wiggled your body under his in an attempt to slide away. He pressed his body against your right leg to get you to stop moving. He picked his head back up to face your tearstained face.

"I'm never letting you go." He pressed his lips to yours in an unwanted kiss, forcefully sticking his tongue into your mouth and invading your space. With a swiftness you used your right knee to severely hurt his groin. Jalen let out a load groan and fell onto the floor, finally releasing you from his vice grip. You jumped up fast, grabbed your bag and headed for the door. Grabbing your keys from the counter you removed his dorm key from your keychain and removed your dorm key from his own key chain.

"Never fucking contact me again!" you screamed and slammed the door.

7 months ago

"Give it back Y/N. Im serious." Tchalla yelled as he chased you down the hallway of his dorm room. You ran into his living room giggling and sat yourself on his plush carpet. You held his mini journal high above your head, teasing him.

"You're not serious look at that big smile on your face" You laughed. He looked down at you and smiled.

"Just hand it over."

"Come get it." You continued to tease. Tchalla leaped on top of you, causing you to fall onto your back with laughter in your voice. Finally grabbing the book Tchalla hovered himself above you.

"Ha. Got i-" he didn't realize the vulnerable position the two of you were in until the games ended. Looking up at him made your heart begin to beat faster. There was tension in the air and you both could definitely feel it.

You couldn't deny your feelings for Tchalla had been developing during the years of friendship the two of you shared. He was always there for you and cared so much about you. He would never go a day without calling or texting you to see if you were alright, even if there was nothing wrong. His big heart was starting to make you fall for him.

He quickly removed his body from yours, allowing you to sit up as well. You stared at the back of his head for sometime before you spoke.

"Tchalla?'

"Y/N I-I'm sorry about that."

You found his shyness adorable as you began to smile.

"Its ok silly." You stood up and walked in front of him with your hand held out. Slowly lifting his head he looked back up at you. "Lets go eat. I'm starving." He took your hand and laughed.

Present

"What the hell am I doing." You asked yourself. "I have a man who actually loves me and I let him walk out the door." Your legs moved before you could even make them. You swung your front door open and looked down the hallway. T'challa was there, walking slowly with his head down until you called out to him.

"T'challa wait!" He turned and stopped in his tracks as he watched you run to him. When you reached him you jumped into his arms, causing him to stumble back as he, surprisingly, caught you.

"It was you. Its you...Its always been you." you said as you hugged him tightly.

"Y/N what are you talking about." Releasing him from your hug you looked deeply into his eyes. "I love you too T'challa"

His eyes lit up and his smile grew wide. Hearing those words from you brought life to his heart again. He brought his hands to the sides of your face, his warm touch bringing you comfort in the moment.

"May I." T'challa asked while still staring into you. "Yes you may" You giggled as he leaned forward to kiss you once more. The kiss got more heated causing T'challa to back you up onto the hallway walls. His hands went down to your backside, rubbing and sqeezing it softly. You broke the kiss in laughter and rested your forehead against his.

Breathlessly he said "Say it again"

"I really love you T'challa Udaku"

A/N: If you like it repost it. And please message me if you want to be part of my taglist☺️

Taglist: @chaneajoyyy @wakandaking12-blog @wakanda-4evr @sisterwifeudaku @tchalla-and-mbaku @wakandankings @wakandamama @melaninmarvel

[fart-gate]

SGA

Season 3 episode 14

Notes by me

- Rodney centric!!!

- talking about his sister being afraid of the dark haha what a dork.........im just kidding I am also afraid of the dark

- man he is on EDGE. Why is he being extra bitchy right now

- oh fuck is he ok????

- john is here to check up on his boy 😊

- ....giantism, invisibility..."

"That'd be cool. I turned into a bug"

- "I'll keep an eye on him" ahhh protective!John

- hey come on ronon.....lay off the fat jokes man. Very rude

- oh ??? Super hearing????

- HE JUST MOVED THAT WITH HIS MIND OMGGGG

- hypoglycemia!

- oh shit its mutating him 😳

- lorne!!!! Havnt seen u in a while babe how r u

- sad we didnt get to see rodney jam the bad guys guns

- UM PUT CARSON DOWN. BAD RODNEY

- "me a super hero! Who wouldve thought!" Johns face I cant

- worried!John

- John is first in line for super powers and I would be too tbh

- ronon asking Rodney if he really wants to try to fight him is really hot oK leave me alone

- "more like fatman" RONON LEAVE HIM ALONE DAMMIT

- hes so excited about reading peoples minds lmaooo

- my god he talks so fast

- "can I shoot him now"

- *swearing in czech*

- Rodney in the chair. Honey your arrogance is showing again

- hes going to ascend whether he wants to or not???? Fuck

-panicked!Rodney

- radek is so pissed lol

- oh fuck no!!! Tell me hes fine. Pls dont kill radek

- HEALING POWERS!!!!! aaawww he saved his friend 😭😭😭😍😍😍

- on a scale of talking about your feelings to inventing a new math, how extreme are you when avoiding emotions? In other news, Rodney invented a new math!

- bruh he needs to talk to Daniel about this stuff. Daniel can tell him how to ascend and then he can just come back if he wants to

- he thinks nothing great can happen to him without there being bad consequences 😩😩😩

- yes!!!! U can come back human!! I just said that I'm so smart

- "mere mortals"

- John is helping him meditate? Shouldnt it be teyla

- um candles??? Are we sure this isnt a date 👀👀

- "think of anything that makes you anxious"

"OH god theres so many things"

- "I liked Ferris wheels" John you're so bad at this just get teyla to do it

- theyre just throwing shade at each other. No progress is being made here guys

- hyper drive for puddle jumpers??? 😃

- he doesnt think hes worthy does he

- dammit rodney!!! You didnt go thru 3 seasons of development for you to think u arent worthy to ascend !!!!

- she said to fix the things that HE knows need fixing and I feel like I know whats coming

- he looks so sick

- the radek talk 😟😟😟😟😩💓💞💕

- the tea ceremony???? That he knew how to do???? He specifically asked about her father oh my goooddd. And she would have done it alone which u arent supposed to do in her culture. He spent that time with her to mourn her father in a traditional way 😟

- hes doing last minute good things for the people he loves bc he thinks hes gonna die

- HE HEALED RONONS SCARS MY GOD THIS IS SO FUCKING AMAZING can u imagine the trauma ronon went thru and everytime he felt his back/saw himself in the mirror he was just constantly reminded of what he went thru. It took Rodney exactly 8 seconds to heal the physical manifestation of ronons trauma. Ronon never has to think about his scars again

- I'm sorry but 500 pages of Dr weir suggests that he started writing it BEFORE he was zapped

- oooo john is his last person to amend with.

- he wants him to write his eulogy 😭😭

- he wants his ashes spread in space?? I mean....theyre just gonna float there forever but ok

- oh fuck he faint

- "Carson....thank you" this is too much

- come on Rodney you can do it!!!! Just concentrate

- "know that we love you" HELLO?????

- "the way a friend feels about another friend!" gotta make sure nobody thinks I'm gay! 😤 Feelings for Rodney???? How dare you say that! 😠😠I would never, I'm not...!! 🚫That's neither here nor there🚫!!! 👫Frankly I resent you saying that! In fact how do I know YOU dont have feelings for rodney hmmm??? Check and mate.

- what!! All they needed to do was zap him again???

- Ronon carrying Rodney 😩😩😍😍😍

- "I'm still smart I think"

- "I'm hungry"

"Hes fine"

- ahhh ronon hug!!💘💘💞💞

- he thought about how bad his ego is and that catapulted him into ascension plain. I love it

- "and you love me" she's never gonna live that down. He will not stop talking about that ever. She has created a monster

- "you and I always had good chemistry which I put more detail about in chapter 10" she dug her own grave by telling him they all loved him. I mean......you cant blame him for bringing it up all the time 🤷

- the machine can turn you into goop?? Lets use it on John - Rodney is back to normal my dudes 😂