#bless you for giving tib a blog

[thatcnamomnwife]

Well, hello!

I really just wanted to check out this app because I don’t know anyone really who blogs here... maybe I could meet new people make friends I can chat with. I don’t work anymore and I have very little company. My ex husbands wife has come to visit and let our youngest boys play together and my family has come in and out to help keep things up in the house. I broke my leg in a car accident in October. I still can’t walk.

I laugh about it now because my two other siblings here have both been in worse car accidents and walked away with scratches. My brother was knocked unconsious and woke up and walked 2 miles home. I hit a tree to avoid hitting the back end of a truck that was stopped in a work zone and when I hit the break popped back and broke my ankle tib and fib... I knew I had broken it but was not aware of how bad it was. My EMT was wonderful in keeping me calm. I heard comments when I got to the hospital about it being really bad but I didn’t want to see the damage. They knocked me out and put me into surgery. I woke up with a fixater on my leg. The next night after I asked for pain meds 3 or 4 times in a row because the Dilaudid didn’t work, my assigned surgeon came in and examined my leg. I had compartment syndrome and needed a fasciotomy asap. so the next time I woke up I still had the fix and then my leg was completely wrapped. Every time I tried to do physical therapy I would. Bleed everywhere. I found out I had two huge gaping cuts in the side of my leg and 2 equally gaping cuts in the top of my foot. In the hospital I tried my best to keep up hope that this would all be over soon. My friends at work (I’m a CNA) got ahold of me and cheered me on the get better and come back to work soon. But here I am. It’s February and I’m still wheelchair bound and not walking. The way my surgeon fixed my leg set it to where my toes almost faced the ground and my ankle is now fixed as if its ready for a stiletto. I have worked hard to get to rotate my ankle and lift my toes a little bit and as my physical therapy has me working on the they are working on lifting this deep scar on top of my foot.

It sucks to have to depend on everyone else to get help. I can do some things on my own. But I can’t cook my own food by myself. I can do dishes actually but it’s really hard. I can move from place to place with my walker. But since I’m on one leg it’s hard and I wear out fast. I can’t go anywhere unless someone takes me. Sitting in a car is hell because I lose circulation in my leg easily. If I get annoyed with my husband or my kids get on my nerves I can’t just go outside.

I spent the first month crying. Every day. I’m not kidding. I cried even harder Every appointment because my surgeon is a straight forward kinda guy. My home health nurse came in and saw that I was cracking and she suggested I act for a low dose antidepressant and I just gave and said yea. I’m tired of crying. Well it’s worked so far. I still get mad and throw fits and cry but I think that’s just me being human and besides that anyone in the medical profession is bound be make a horrible patient.

I am a lot better now. In fact despite the fact that my leg still doesn’t work, I’m in ok spirits. I miss my job, my residents, and most of my coworkers. I worked through what I feel is the worst part of COVID in my area and I worked while I had it. I was so proud of my self for not giving up in that mess. I miss the hard work. I wanna go back but I know I will never get to run around like I did before. It just sucks.

But in the midst of this whole crap show my husband and I got married in December! It was a beautiful low cost home wedding and my family couldn’t come because they were quarantined but we had our other loved ones there. I won’t lie I looked amazing in my wedding dress and my hair and makeup was gorgeous. Nothing has changed since we got married. We are still bickering at each other but at the end of the day I love him and he loves me. We have been through it all in these 6 years and I wouldn’t have him any other way. He’s lazy. He frustrates me but he is a good man and a good dad to our son. My daughters love him. My oldest calls him dad. And he has pretty much jumped trough hoops for them since he met them. We are all a happy family and I love my life. I just don’t like where I’m at in my life.

I have 3 kids. My oldest is 14 and she’s a type 1 diabetic. Shes a hormonal teen with diabetes. We have blood sugar issues every day. Hormones raging. She recently got grounded for not doing her chores and lying about her blood checks and she lost it over not being on the phone for a few days. But damn she is smart. She wants to be a mortician when she graduates college. She passes state testing like it’s nothing. And she’s a complete music lover. She was the 18th chair in junior all region choir last year. She was the youngest in her group to get in. So I brag on her a lot. My middle child is a lot of energy and she frustrates me. She’s 10 and she’s been stuck in this stage where she acts like she doesn’t have common sense. We’ve taught her how to use the washer and dryer several times and this kid still says she don’t know how to use it. She’s the one who argues even if she knows she’s wrong she will still try to make you think she’s right. She will agree to something one minute and then get mad about it later. She will not brush her hair and she does this on purpose because she claims is a part of her personality. She also recently told me she’s bisexual. She’s a good kid though. Teachers and kids at school love her she don’t get in trouble ever. And she’s also a smart kid! She excelled in school to the highest. I’m very proud of my girls.

My son is 4 and he is a big ball of adhd. He bounces off walls and he’s very violent. We have been trying to get him evaluated so we can get him on proper meds before kindergarten but It hasn’t happened yet. But he’s also a sweet kid. He is very smart too. He knows all of his colors and can count to 10. He knows his name. But he tells you he’s 400 years old instead of 4 lol.

My mom and sister are both life savers to me. They have taken care of me through this. When I need them they are there. My brother prefers to live his own life and visit at moms with me from time to time. But I love him. I miss him.

My dad left my mom when I was 13. He caught up with my half sister. Fell in love with his ex wife and moved away. I have seen him 4 times since he left and the last time I saw him was when I was 19 and pregnant with my oldest child. He’s never met my kids in person and he’s only spoken to my oldest on the phone once. 2 years ago he disappeared after planning to come stay on my moms property to get back on his feet and get proper medical treatment. He asked our side of the family for money (like $1000) and none of us had that. So he tried to make us feel bad and then never contacted us again. I’ve heard fromy step sisters that he’s been spotted here and there but we honestly Don’t know where he is, what he’s doing and if he’s even alive. I hate to say it but it doesn’t bother me anymore. I used to break down thinking about him dying and not knowing. Now I feel different. He’s been gone most of my life now.

I also have this best friend who is more than my best friend. She’s my soul. This girl has helped me through some of the worst parts of my life. She and I don’t get to see each other very often but we are always family to each other. She and I talk almost daily. I just love her.

That’s my family though. It’s a hot mess but it’s mine and I love it. At the end of every day I am blessed because I’m loved and cared for.

[diveronarpg]

Congratulations, LIZ! You’ve been accepted for the role of PARIS with an approved FC change to Sean Teale. Admin Jen: All I have to say here is GOD BLESS. That’s it. That’s my note. God, I’ve waited so long for us to have Paris grace our dash, and your take on him was everything I could ever want and more. You captured Priam’s essence perfectly, from the moral ambiguity that surrounds him, to the existentialism that drives his worldviews and motivations. At the same time, you’ve added your own touch to those concepts and made them your own, like with the headcanon of his grandfather’s death. It’s clear that you have such a deep, profound understanding of who he is and all that he could be, and I love it. I absolutely love it. Please read over the checklist and send in your blog within 24 hours.

WELCOME TO THE MOB.

OUT OF CHARACTER

Alias | Liz

Age | 28

Preferred Pronouns | She/her

Activity Level | Thanks to quarantine, I imagine quite consistent.

Timezone | GMT +4.

How did you find the rp?  | Used to play Tib hehe:)

Current/Past RP Accounts |

https://tiberius-capulets.tumblr.com/

https://maksim-kurylenko.tumblr.com/

https://castillo-adrian.tumblr.com/

IN CHARACTER

Character | Paris, Priam Taravella (I’d like to request FC change to Sean Teale and age Priam up to 26, if possible?).

What drew you to this character? |

Perhaps, if not his grandfather’s death, Priam would’ve always been the child his parents wanted: a docile, polite son, with ambition and drive to take over and expand the family business. It’s not that the death of Salvatore Taravella, Sr. affected him in a heart-breaking way, no, Priam hardly spent any time with him and he remembers nothing about the man. But what would become a life-altering occasion in young Taravella’s life, is that unlike most of the children at the age of three, he understood the irreversibility and universality of death right away.

As he grew up, Priam had been defined by the revelation that life was a march to our eventual demise since the moment we were born, a race against the clock. The matters such as career, riches and family business seemed so trivial, so unworthy of his time. He started to believe, you only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. That chase of what is the meaningful way of living had led to multiple metamorphoses of Priam Taravella. He developed a tendency to chase one experience after another, but not in a hedonistic way, but more existential. There was a deeply woven thread in the everyday being he wanted to discover and pull it until it led to where he belonged, where he wouldn’t feel the ever-present void.

Maybe if his parents had been around and taught him right from wrong, he wouldn’t need to discover and explore life all on his own, on his own terms.

He’s an enigma, and that’s what drove me to him the most. What makes him dangerous is his unpredictability, his failure to relate to basic human motivations, he’s a puzzle that can’t be solved.

What is a future plot idea you have in mind for the character? |

The Wild Card

One thing Priam had never been good at, is being told what path to follow. Despite the fact that ranks and order are integral in the mob operations, and he understands that, Priam is who he is – a man marching to his own beat. I would love him concoct and execute something of massive proportions - something that could result in utter wrath from Capulet leaders, or a great victory for them (or maybe both).

The North Star

Given how important his moral ambiguousness is to Priam’s character arc, it would be interesting to explore someone entering his life and trying to become his North Star, his moral compass. I’d love to explore his nihilist worldview being challenged and him thurst into the uncharted waters of wanting to do the right thing.

The Devil on his Shoulder

I’d also love to explore at some point Paris being dragged on the opposite side of the moral spectrum. Maybe an event or a person pushes him into cold-blooded murder, torture, or something he normally wouldn’t see himself doing.

Are you comfortable with killing off your character? | Yes.

IN DEPTH

For someone who thinks so much about death, smoking cigarette after cigarette makes him a walking contradiction. He’s full of them, Priam, of contradictions.

The prodigal prince leaves his 1966 Chevloret Sting Ray in the parking lot of his office building and covers the short distance from there to the Castelvecchio Bridge on foot, enjoying the brisk Spring weather, Verona twilight and a cigarette in his hand. It’s been two years since his tech start-up won a government contract and launched his mutually beneficial relationship with Cosimo. Priam provides Capulets with information, more valuable than any weapon. His company produces technology for Italy’s law enforcement: facial recognition software, thermal imaging and automatic license plate recognition. This makes Cosimo’s soldiers virtually invisible to the law enforcement and any enemy – traceable.

On top of that, despite his nonexistent relationship with his parents, Priam still is a Taravella. A legacy. No wonder the king wants him on his side forever, vowen into the Capulet family life as a future son-in-law.

“If I were a sentimental man, I’d say it’s a beautiful starry night,” the tiger of Verona meets him standing on the bridge with a menacing grin, “But I’m not.”

“I never really liked looking at the night’s sky,” Priam muses. Another contradiction, considering he spends most of nights awake, “stars at merely old photographs. In reality, they’re probably all dead by now.” His last words drift off, distracting by the two of Tiberius’s brutes holding a man on his knees. Priam recognises the man as the CEO of his competitor start-up, the one in consideration for the government contract, just like Priam’s.

“I believe I’ve informed Cosimo there’s no need for taking extra measures. I’m absolutely confident I’ll win the bid this year, too,” Priam turns to Tiberius, demanding an explanation.

“…and Cosimo takes your word for it. But, this sniveling piece of shit is trying to find dirt on you and expose some of your… connections. I say we shoot the bastardo and dump him in the water. What do you say?” The tiger presents a tempting offer.

There is no fate worse than death. Death is final. Does Priam hate the man enough to subject to what he fears the most? But the power of having a life stripped away by a mere nod of his head is intoxicating and Priam finds himself drunk on it. Not just that, the power of having others to pull the trigger for you. If you think about it, the idiot brought this on himself, didn’t he? If only he could’ve accepted the loss like a real man. But he’s not a real man, is he?

So Priam gives the nod that the beast in Tiberius covets so much. The sound of silenced pistol pierces the air sharply, but for only their own ears to hear. It’s almost like a twig snapped, and man wasn’t murdered with a bullet in between his eyes.

A thud and now lifeless body belongs to the Adige river now.

Priam looks down on his pristine white shirt. Bloodstain on his chest is like a map of a violent new continent. Taravella didn’t pull the trigger, but the blood still ended up smearing him. How symbolic, he thinks to himself.

“I’ll see on a Sunday dinner, then,” Tiberius bids goodbye. It has became a tradition – Sunday dinners with the whole Capulet family.

“I’ll see you,” Priam pets him on the shoulder like a friend he pretends to be. As if. Tiberius is no intellectual equal to him, merely a capable weapon. All of them are, save a handful of people he’s met in his life.

Castlevecchio Bridge is his favourite place in Verona. After the Capulet soldiers leave, Priam lingers, overlooks the pulsating city. How many times has he come here? The bridge, the pondering, the agony of breaking through personal limitations had been constant in a life of ever-metamorposing Priam Taravella. Art, literature, business, philosophy, sports, organised crime… all instruments to help Priam past his limiting horizons into spheres of ever-expanding realization. As he crosses threshold after threshold, conquering dragon after dragon, the stature of the divinity that he summons to his highest wish increases, until it subsumes the cosmos. Finally, the mind breaks the bounding sphere of the cosmos to a realization transcending all experiences of form - all symbolizations, all divinities: a realization of the ineluctable void.

Extras: moodboard