#bitch over the phone ‘I’ve been leaving messages’ she left ONE voicemail yesterday. that I returned. and she tries to talk to me

[applecherry108]

I’m going fucking insane.

My coworker is at Coachella so I’m the sole employee in the office for 3 days. My coworker is really good at faking niceness for strangers and randos, she’s really outgoing, whereas I hit my complete burnout point a few years ago and my autistic ass can no longer humor idiots, assholes, and old people.

Of all the idiots and assholes testing my patience today, it’s an old person that’s the last straw.

This guy will just….come into our office, every so often. Not to buy anything. Not to see the doctor. Just to chitchat. I do not want to fucking chitchat with the old man with nothing better to do than take up a working person’s time with bullshit. He’s nice, sure, but dude get out. I have a thousand things to do and I’m literally buried under files currently.

But I try. I try to be nice and make small talk. But he asks if I’m going to see the new Russell Crowe movie. Which one? The pope’s exorcist? Oh yeah, actually I am—I like horror movies.

OLD MAN SCOFFS AND SAYS ITS NOT *TECHNICALLY* A HORROR MOVIE BECAUSE ITS ABOUT A REAL PERSON. MY GUY. ITS A HORROR MOVIE. ITS SENSATIONALIZING A REAL PERSON BUT ITS 100% A HORROR MOVIE.

Thank god our next patients walk in then and Old Man leaves but like…. Get out. Get out and leave me alone, I didn’t want to chitchat in the first place, but you wanna argue about whether or not the horror movie is a horror movie??? Old Man, at least when people try to make conversation with a barista and they’re forced to play nice, you at least ordered goods and services. You did no such thing here. Get. Out.

[fific7]

Dangerous and Divine - Part 6

Billy Russo x Reader

Summary: Billy Russo is an itch you don’t want to scratch. But he’s all over you like a rash.

A/N: This does not follow canon, it’s mainly fluff & lemon zest 🍋 with a side of angst. The GIF is from Exposed, unreleased pilot show in case you’re wondering 😌... Billy vibes.

Warnings: Some drinking & swearing.

(My GIF)

He made it out onto the street, looking around him in all directions, heart sinking as he couldn’t see her anywhere.

Running his fingers through his hair, Billy continued scanning the crowded streets. No.... nothing. He grabbed his phone and dialled her number. She didn’t pick up. So he texted her.

“Angel, just saw you in the restaurant. I was there for a business lunch, really hope you don’t think there was anything else to it cos there wasn’t. Please - call me back or pick up when I call.”

He tried another couple of times including FaceTime but no, she definitely wasn’t picking up. Trying once more, he let it ring through to voicemail, and left basically the same message on there. He had no intention of returning to Madani and continuing lunch - too many awkward questions to face there apart from anything else - so he went back to his car, got in, slamming his hands down onto the steering wheel a few times before starting the engine, and driving back to Anvil.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

You and your friend had only gone a few doors down to another restaurant, and luckily they had a table available. Once you’d ordered and had glasses of wine in your hands, your friend Karen had fixed you with a steely gaze and said, “Okay, give.”

She worked as a reporter at one of the big newspapers, and you hadn’t had the chance to catch up with her for a good few months. And you knew she wouldn’t let this go until she’d wrung all the juicy details out of you, so you took a big sip of wine and sighed.

Catching her up from the whole ex-boyfriend situation to the cocktail party and meeting your new love interest, through to becoming lovers and maybe thinking it could go somewhere, you finally got to today’s fiasco.

“So, literally as soon as we sat down, I look up and that big fucker’s walking in with some pretty girl and looking extremely comfortable with her!” You gave what could only be described as an angry growl, “I mean I’d sussed out from the get-go that he was a player, but ... uhhh!!!... how could I be so damn stupid to fall for his shit talk?!!! Telling me I was his girlfriend!!!” You blew out a big breath.

“And then...“ you switched to your fake “man” voice, “‘Oh, I got a job I’ll be on for the next couple of days, angel.’” Another angry huff from you. “Yeah, right, on a ‘job’...he was obviously gonna be ON her! For about 48 hours by the sound of it. Bitch! And he’s a fucking jerk.”

Once Karen could get a word in edgeways when your rant drew to a close, she said in a calming voice, “Honey, it sounds like you had a lucky escape. There’s a lot of them in New York, you know... fucking jerks, I mean.”

You felt your eyes welling up, but blinked the tears back fiercely, you weren’t going to cry over that stupid big douchebag. You pulled your phone out of your bag, “I mean, look! Look at what he literally put in my phone yesterday evening...” and, ignoring your notifications for the moment, you scrolled to Contacts and turned the phone towards her.

Karen rolled her eyes, “Urrrghh, how lame is that? ‘Your Boyfriend’?” shaking her head. Even though you were furious at him, you felt a twinge of annoyance at her comment. You’d thought it was quite cute. Well, you had before that little shitshow. Then she put her face closer to the screen, “Hey, wait a minute!.. lemme see his photo?”

You handed the phone to her, and she peered at the image. “Oh my god,” she breathed, looking up at you, “...what’s your guy’s name?” “Billy Russo,” you spat back, loath to even voice it. She handed you the phone back. “Well, that’s just damn spooky,” she said, looking amazed. She leant in to you, “I’ve been seeing a guy for a couple of months, his name’s Frank,” and your mouth dropped. “Billy’s got a friend called Frank!” you said, staring at her. She nodded, “Yep, works at Anvil which is owned by the one and only Billy Russo!”

She sat back, taking a long sip of her wine. “What a freaking coincidence this is,” she shook her head. “Frank’s told me a little about him, you know and I’m afraid you’re right - he sounds like a total player.” She looked at you sympathetically, “Sorry.” You waved a hand in the air, “Nothing I hadn’t guessed for myself, Karen. But... he seemed so sincere.” You laughed self-depracatingly, “I was gonna be the one who tamed the bad boy. Huh!!”

You scrolled through the notifications, realising they were all from Billy. “I think he must’ve seen me! He’s called and texted.” You read the text, huffing and showing it to Karen, who raised her eyebrows and commented, “Nice recovery, Russo.” “The voicemail’s the same,” you said, as you listened to it. “What a load of bullshit. I mean, c’mon, who walks a business lunch date to the table with his hand on her back?”

Karen nodded, “No-one, unless they wanna get slapped with a lawsuit.”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Billy slammed his office door behind him, and threw himself into his chair, tapping out a staccato rhythm on his desktop with a long finger. He reached down, opening his bottom desk drawer and taking out a bottle of whisky and a glass. A moment later, the door opened and Frank came in, looking concerned. He took in Billy’s less-than-immaculate hair, bouncing knee and tense demeanour.

Billy waggled the whisky bottle and quirked an eyebrow at him, but Frank shook his head.

“Okay, Bill, what’s up? Something go wrong?” Billy looked up at him, scowling ferociously, “Fuck yes!” he bit out, “Frankie... everything’s gone wrong.”

Before he could say anything else, Frank’s phone rang and he held a finger up to Billy to say he was going to take the call.

“Hi, sweetheart,” he answered it, “how’re you?” Billy heard a big outburst of indecipherable speech from the phone, and then saw Frank’s eyes flick over to him. “Oh, uhhh okay.. umm right, yeah he’s here. Yeah... yep, I’ll let him know. Will I see you later?” He smiled fondly as he went on, “Okay! That’s great, see you then.” He hung up, hand going to his jaw and running over his stubbled chin, looking worried.

“Bill...” he started, just staring at him and Billy stared right back, “What?”

Frank said a name to him, his angel’s name, and continued, “You know her?” Billy nodded, “Yeah, that’s my girl.” Frank plopped down into the chair across from him, “Not sure that’s the case now.” Billy nodded, “I know. That’s what I was about to tell you. I took Madani out to lunch and my girl was in the fuckin’ restaurant.” He shook his head, “She ran right outta there and I followed but couldn’t find her. So I headed back here. Left Madani sitting there in the restaurant.”

He poured a generous slug of whisky into the glass and knocked back most of it. “Now my girl’s mad at me and Dinah’s mad at me, and this operation could be down the tube.”

Frank sighed, rubbing his big paw over his face. “And Karen’s her friend, can you believe that? So she’s mad at you too. Fuckin’ hell, Russo.”

“Yeah,” said Billy, also sighing. “How the fuck am I gonna fix this?”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Dinah Madani was not a happy bunny. She stomped into her office, yelling out “Sam!!!” as she went. He hurried in behind her. “Something wrong, Dinah?” She gave him a contemptuous look, “I see you’ve been working on your powers of observation. Well done! Yes, something’s wrong!” Sitting down behind her desk, she glared up at him, “Russo!!! That’s what wrong. That piece of shit.”

Inwardly, Sam laughed to himself. Despite Madani’s sarcastic gibe at his perceptiveness, he’d quickly realised as soon as Russo had popped up in this case that Madani had the serious hots for him. She thought she’d been getting somewhere with him, both on the case and personally, but now something must’ve put a spanner in the works on either one or both of those.

“What’s pretty boy done now?” he asked, trying and failing to completely hide his smirk. She scowled at him, “We’d gone out for lunch - to discuss the case,” she hastily added, and Sam thought to himself ‘yeah, right, and what were you hoping dessert was gonna be?’

“He spotted someone leaving the restaurant and off he goes, saying he’s got to catch up with them.” She viciously powered up her laptop. “Think it was a woman,” she mumbled. “Sorry, what?” said Sam innocently. “I said, I think it was a woman!” spat out Madani, “are you deaf or something?”

Sam smirked again, “Oh. Dear. Someone to do with the case, you think?” She stared at her screen, “How should I know? But that bastard’s got some explaining to do.”

Well this afternoon was gonna be a complete blast, thought Sam.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

You’d returned to Chelsea, and spent the whole afternoon getting under your team’s feet in the café. Not wanting to sit and brood in your office, you’d busied yourself ‘helping them out’, when in fact they didn’t actually need any assistance. And you could sense you were vaguely irritating them. But you didn’t feel up to telling them what the problem was.

Eventually, you’d asked if one of them wanted the rest of the day off as paid leave, and Gabrielle had jumped at the chance. Her older sister had just recently popped out another baby, and she was keen to visit and fulfill her role as doting aunt.

The two guys had watched you warily for the rest of the day, in case all your nervous energy ended up causing some kind of coffee-shop catastrophe. You sent them off at the end of the day, saying you’d close up yourself. Which turned out to be a mistake. Looking vacantly out at the street, you closed and locked the door when they left, and that’s when you spotted the Wraith, parked diagonally opposite the café.

Resting your forehead against the cool glass of the door for a moment, knowing you should really have anticipated that this would be Billy’s next move when you didn’t respond to his attempts at contacting you. Either turn up here or at your apartment. Not difficult to work out. You got the fright of your life as the doorway suddenly darkened, and long legs clad in suit trousers and a pair of shiny black shoes appeared in your line of vision. You’d jumped back in surprise and Billy leant one one arm on the door, staring in at you and mouthing “Please?” at you, followed by (you thought), “I just wanna explain.”

You’d looked away from his pleading eyes, contemplating what you were going to do. Let him in, don’t let him in. You couldn’t deny you wanted to hear his explanation. In all its no-doubt manufactured glory. So, heaving a big sigh, you unlocked the door and immediately walked away to the counter, leaving him to actually open the door and walk in. A small victory, you thought. You hadn’t actually let him in after all. Sort of.

“Coffee?” you asked over your shoulder. “Please.” You made an Americano for him, and a caffé corretto for yourself. You weren’t too fond of grappa, so topped up the espresso with some brandy. Billy, who was leaning on the counter watching you, raised an eyebrow at you. “Ooh, that bad, huh? Can I get some too?” You just stared at him, and he added, “Please?” so you added a shot to his coffee and handed it to him.

Sipping your own strong and bracing beverage, you leaned back against the unit behind you, face neutral, waiting. He took a long drink of his fortified coffee, eyes never leaving yours. He carefully placed the cup back into the saucer, leaning his arms on the counter and looking back up at you, the tip of his tongue swiftly moving over his bottom lip.

“I know you’ll probably think this is total bullshit, but I promise you it’s not,” he said into the silence. You nodded, “Mmhmm.” His eyes drilled into yours, sincerity shining out of them, “That was purely a business lunch. She’s a Homeland agent, and Frankie and I are... in the middle of something with that agency. I can’t tell you any of the details... yet. I’m sorry.”

You huffed out a long breath. “Firstly, Billy, since when does a business lunch entail walking the woman to a table with a hand on her back?” He winced, but you weren’t finished, “And right now, to me, the only thing you looked like getting into the middle of was her.” This time he flinched back from the venom in your voice, but he maintained eye contact with you.

“Angel, I swear to you... On. My. Life. There is nothing and will never be anything between me and Agent Madani.” So.... Agent Madani, your brain rolled the words around your mind. “We’re in a joint operation with them, and I need to make sure she doesn’t drop us out of the loop, they’re good at doing that.”

“And how’re you doing that, Billy? With ‘business lunches’, with lots of flirting? She got the hots for you, hmmm Billy? Yeah? So, ultimately with sex? Keep her really sweet?”

Damn, you knew you’d hit the nail right on the head. His face had flushed, guilt written all over him and he’d slid back on the counter slightly. You’d like to bet that If he hadn’t met you, that’s exactly what would’ve happened. Maybe he’d just not got that far down his timetable with her yet.

You stared intently into his eyes, “Slept with her yet, Billy?” He straightened up to his full height, looking down at you, a strange distant expression in his eyes. “No, angel, I haven’t. And I can’t deny what you’ve just said. That was the plan. Me and Frankie need to know what information and leads she’s got. Yeah, she’d like to fuck me, she’s made that pretty obvious. But we hadn’t quite got to that stage yet.” He took a deep breath, and said in a rush, “We had a drink after work one night, and I kissed her.”

“Uhuh. Did you.” Statement, not question, folding your arms over your chest.

“Before we met!” he hastily added, emphasising the ‘before’, “...it happened days before we met. And it was purely business to me. Nothing more.” “Really? She’s pretty hot.” You could tell he spent a split second thinking how best to reply and keep his balls intact at the same time. “Well, yeah she is... but the spark’s not there for me. She doesn’t float my boat. Not like you do.” You smirked, good answer Russo!

“So what would your schedule have been?” He looked at you, puzzled, “What d’you mean?”

“Flirt, tick. Kiss, tick,” you made little air ticking motions with your finger. “Fuck...? Now, just when would that’ve been on the table, Billy?” He looked away from you, shaking his head, “I dunno. Whenever it would’ve been necessary.” Glancing back at you, “Look, I know this sounds really...” “Shitty?” you supplied. He allowed himself a small grin, “Yeah, shitty,” then the grin dropped. “But this is life and death, angel, and it means finally clearing our names as long as it all goes down okay.” You decided to spare Billy the verbal barb which had popped effortlessly into your head, along the lines of ‘would it depend on who went down on who?’

But you didn’t, instead saying. “Oh right, that’d be clearing your name from when you and Frank got arrested by Homeland, yes?” Billy gave you a hint of a smile, “So, you have been digging after all.”

You nodded, “Yes, I have. Not that I found out much. The dead CIA guy, him having funded you, you guys getting arrested. That was pretty much it.” He nodded, “That’s the bare bones of it, the important parts though. I promise you that as soon as I can, I’ll tell you the whole sorry story. We’re still right in the... it’s all still goin’ on right now.”

You smirked to yourself, you knew he’d changed what he’d been about to say as he was saying it, in case you took another dig at him about exactly what he was in the middle of.

He moved round the counter, and stood next to you. His dark eyes looked huge as they stared into yours, “I promise you, angel, you’re the only woman I’m interested in. The only one I want to be with. Please say you believe me.” The annoying thing was, you did. You didn’t like what he’d told you - that basically if you hadn’t been on the scene he’d have slept with Madani to keep her ‘on side’ - but you did believe that he hadn’t had sex with her. You thought that the small snippet of her body language you’d observed had screamed ‘I want him’ but not the casual touching and languid looks of ‘I’ve had him’.

You gave a big sigh. “Okay, Russo, I believe you.” A look of pure relief crossed his face, and he immediately grabbed both of your hands, pulling you close and kissing you hungrily. You pulled away after a few moments, just as he was trying to deepen the kiss. “But you’re on parole for a while.” He groaned, which became a laugh, “Okay, yeah... whatever you want, angel. For however long you want. I guess I deserve some punishment.”

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

After closing up, you and Billy crossed the road and headed towards his car. He beeped his car remote at it as he approached and then opened the passenger door for you. As you folded yourself into the seat, he put one arm on the door frame and leant in to kiss you again. “Sneaky,” you said as you moved your lips away from his. “Always,” he replied and smiled widely at you. He seemed very happy to have been granted ‘parole’, you thought.

As Billy drove off in the direction of his place - realising this produced a part-exasperated smirk on your face - you contemplated what a fucking awful, emotional, but ultimately good day you’d had.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

Someone else was stewing about precisely the same thing. Only without the good ending.

Dinah Madani had a furious scowl on her face as she put her SUV into Drive and pulled out into the traffic flow, following Billy’s car.

She’d just watched that whole little pantomime as he’d opened the car door for that woman, then leant in and obviously kissed her, although she hadn’t been able to actually see that from her vantage point a couple of cars behind his.

When she’d followed Billy from Anvil out to Chelsea earlier on, for the life of her she couldn’t figure out why he’d headed into a coffee shop, of all places. She’d discovered that she couldn’t see into the café from where she was parked, and didn’t want to break cover and walk over to the window in case Billy spotted her.

Then out he’d trotted, hand in hand with whoever this woman was - a waitress in a coffee shop? “Classy, Russo, very classy,” she said out loud, in a bitchy voice. She could ask him about it, she thought, but knowing him he’d more than likely tell her it was none of her business.

Well, she was going to make it her business to find out whatever she could about this apparent liaison of his. She pulled over and watched as his car disappeared into the underground carpark of his apartment block.

It could have some bearing on the case, she thought, trying to justify this course of action to herself.

She ignored that other little voice in her head which said to her that she was just plain jealous.

»»————————————-———-　⚜　———————————-————-««

@blackbirddaredevil23 @galaxyjane

[waywardnerd67]

My World, My Everything

Summary: She was everything to him. His entire world revolved around her, but a decision had to be made. He had a job to do and in making this decision he would save everything that meant the world to him. Characters: Dean Winchester, Reader Pairing: Dean x Reader Warnings: Angst/Fluff Word Count: 1899 Prompt: “All Our Own” -Radio Company (Lyrics are bold) A/N: This is for @atc74​ Collab Challenge Contest

His finger traced the worn edges of a small photo. The moment in which it was taken as fresh in his mind as if it had happened the day before. It was meant to be the most important day of his life and ended being one of the worst. Slipping the photo back into its spot held within his wallet taking one last, long look at it before closing it in place. Looking out over the dashboard of his car, Dean Winchester looked up into the darkening sky as the end came barreling his way.

October 29, 2005 - San Diego, California

Dean pulled into his normal parking spot at (Y/N)’s apartment building. It had been a few weeks since he last saw her. His case in New Orleans had taken a little longer than expected but now his plan was back on track. Before heading up to her place, he pulled out his phone hitting his dad’s number.

“Dad, when you get this call me. There’s something important I need to talk to about.”

Snapping the phone shut, he grabbed his bag and ran up the exterior stairs with his key in his hand. The door flew open just as he reached the top of the stairs. His eyes traveled the length of her curvy body marveling in her natural beauty. Her bright eyes matched the smile spreading across her face.

“Stop gawking and get your ass in here, Winchester.”

He jogged over and scooped her up holding her tightly, “I missed you pretty girl.”

Leaving (Y/N) had been the one of the hardest moments he had and finally pushed him to make a huge change in his life. Letting her go, Dean set his stuff near the door and kicked off his boots next to the black heels she must have worn to work that day. Seeing his stuff next to hers had his chest tightening with pure happiness.

Leaning against the counter he watched her cook as she told him all about her clients for the day. The only thought running through his mind was that this beautiful, successful business woman was all his. Instinctively he ran his hand over his right pocket of his jeans smiling softly as she continued to talk. Their dinner was simple and filled with laughter as Dean told her all about the voodoo case he had in New Orleans. The rest of their evening was filled with passionate love making and the most restful sleep Dean had in weeks.

Dean awoke to gentle kisses being pressed against his chest and shining eyes staring up at him. The corner of her lips curling into a smirk as he raised an eyebrow at her. One look from her had him pouncing and their morning began as their night had ended.

“Did you think about what we last spoke of?” (Y/N) was snuggled into his side with her leg draped over his waist.

He brushed his calloused fingertips against her soft skin, “Listen to yesterday long before the way it has become and it all came down to you.”

“And…?”

“I don't really know the way, played out stranger than it seemed. But what went down came true like an all day dream.” He pushed himself up as she propped herself up on her elbow.

Her eyes searched his eyes for the unspoken words he was holding deep within him, “Dean, it doesn’t have to be a dream. You’re twenty-six now and can make your own decisions. Especially when it comes to having a stable life.”

He ran one hand through his hair, “I don't wanna be the one to say it's wrong. When the heavens open and a new day comes along. I know I would rather be together alone in a big top circle and a world we can call our own. It's all our own.”

“Does that mean…” the sheet fell from her body as she sat up hope shining in her eyes.

“In a world we can call our own we'll find shelter, darling. Where I'll always promise to never let be. I’m here to stay.”

(Y/N) launched herself onto him kissing him wherever she could get her lips on, “Handsome, that is all I want is you here all the time. You have no idea how happy I am right now.”

“Well, you can show me how happy you are.” Dean laughed as she playfully smacked him.

She got up heading towards her bathroom, “Maybe I will if you join me for a shower.”

Dean was about to follow her when he heard his phone beep with a new voicemail, “I’ll be right there.”

He watched her go in closing the door behind her. Looking at his phone his body tensed as the missed number was his dad’s. Quickly dialing his voicemail he listened to the strange message.

“Dean...something big is starting to happen...I need to try and figure out what's going on. It may... Be very careful, Dean. We're all in danger.”

There was EVP on the message which had panic tightening around his chest. He heard the shower turn on and his heart began to ache painfully. Pulling on his jeans his hand brushed against the small object that brought tears to his eyes. Getting dressed as quickly as he could, Dean grabbed his things then wrote out a note for (Y/N).

“I have to go. I love you, Dean.”

He shut the door as he heard (Y/N) called out to him. Running down the stairs and to his Baby, Dean took off like a bat out of hell. He knew the path all too well down to Palo Alto where his little brother, Sam, was going to college. It had been years since they last spoke but Dean always made a point to go find him from afar. Now, he needed his help in order to find their dad.

Present Day

Dean stood in front of his car alone facing the greatest threat the world had ever seen. Sam was back at the Bunker trying to figure out another way to save the world, but Dean knew it was pointless. This was his burden to bare. This was his destiny. Dying to save the world and his life was worth losing knowing that he was saving the world (Y/N) was living in. As he watched the dark clouds split open and a figure in a white suit emerging from them. Dean closed his eyes, the vision of (Y/N) clearly in his mind before opening them and heading straight for Chuck.

                                                          ***

(Y/N) was wrapped in her favorite blanket when the doorbell rang. A tall man, with long chestnut hair stood there. His eyes were bloodshot and tired looking. He was holding a small shoebox in his hands.

“May I help you?”

“Are you (Y/N) (Y/L/N)?” His voice was hoarse as if he had been crying.

She nodded, “Yes I am.”

The man took a deep breath, “My name is Sam Winchester…”

Hearing the surname made her gasp, “You’re Dean’s little brother. W-Where is Dean?”

His hazel eyes connected with hers with tears in them, “D-Dean wanted you to have this when he… when he passed.”

(Y/N) stared at the box shaking her head, “No. N-No… he can’t be. Tell me, he’s around the corner or on his way. Don’t you dare tell me he’s gone!”

Sam held the box out to her, “I-I’m sorry, but I can’t. He sacrificed his life in order to save the world. He defeated God and defended all the people of this world. The only thing he made me promise to do is deliver this box to you.”

As she took a hold of the flimsy shoebox a blood curdling sob erupted from deep within her chest and her body gave out as she fell into Sam’s outstretched arms. He helped her inside to her couch as she let out all of her anguish knowing the world no longer had Dean Winchester in it. Sam sat with her until there were no more tears left for her to give.

“I’m s-sorry.”

He rubbed her back, wiping away his own tears, “No need to apologize. Would you mind if I stay while you open the box? I’ve been watching him carry this around since he came to get me from college. I’m curious what’s inside.”

She nodded her trembling hands taking the lid off. There were all kinds of trinkets from all his travels. A worn copy of her favorite book, Little Women, with his hand written notes. A small photo album with pictures of him throughout the years he was away from her. Seeing his piercing olive eyes and handsome face brought fresh tears down her cheeks. Then there was a small square box and an envelope. Within the box was a simple diamond ring, a soft gasp coming from her.

“Pretty girl, I know you probably hate me and you should. I had to leave. Not because of my dad or the job. I had to leave to keep you safe. There is nothing in this world more important to me than you being alive, safe, healthy. Even though the thought of you being with someone else tears my heart apart, I hope you found someone who loves you as much as I do. I want you to live a full and happy life.

If you’re reading this then Sam has kept his promise. I’m gone but the world is safe. Don’t be sad that I’m gone. There was no choice in the matter and no other way. I had to save the world in order to save you and that meant my death. (Y/N), I love you. You are my world, my everything. I wanted to give you this ring the morning I left. I kept hoping one day I might be lucky enough to give you this in person. Now, I want you to have it to remember that you were the only woman for me. I love you so much. Live a long, beautiful life. -Dean”

(Y/N) took the ring, slipping it onto her finger, more tears falling down her face, “Damn it Winchester, even in death you’re a charming son of a bitch.”

Sam started laughing and (Y/N) found herself joining him. They began telling stories about Dean to one another until the early hours of the morning. Exchanging phone numbers with promises to keep in touch, (Y/N) watched Sam drive away in the all too familiar black Impala. She looked up to the sky, a cool breeze whipping past her.

“Dean Winchester, if you can hear me then you get your ass back down here to me.” She closed her eyes praying that he would be in front of her when they opened.

                                                          ***

A thousand miles away, the Earth split open shaking the ground violently. A large hand grasped the edge of the opening pulling themselves up onto the dirt. Coughing and dry heaving until collapsing onto the ground. Catching their breath and getting up they made their way down the nearest road. Nearly an hour later, they entered a small gas station asking to use the phone.

“This is Sam.” The familiar voice brought a wave of emotions over them.

“Sammy, it’s me. I-I’m back.”

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[sadaboutniall]

Without Fear

masterlist | tag | wattpad

hiya! since tomorrow is thanksgiving I thought it would be better for everyone if I posted this week’s chapter today! hope you like!

Chapter Two. February 

give me moonlight, and a smile from you that I can // that I can barely believe — dancing under red skies, dermot kennedy

It comes on slow, the way waves lap up against the shore late at night, when there aren’t many boats out to disrupt them. Over and over, bit by bit, it settles in. The first wave of it bites at Lu’s ankles when her toilet overflows at 6am, leaving her standing in her socks in the bathroom, soaking wet, worrying about the water leaking into the shop below, while Ruairí meows in concern from his spot atop the sink. Frantic, Lu calls her dad, and it goes to voicemail twice before she remembers it’s 1am in New York. 

Accompanied only by a YouTube tutorial and the rising sun, Lu manages to fix the mess, shower, and start the day all on her own. Her dad calls back five hours later, and Lu feels like she’s lived a whole lifetime between then and now. 

The second wave of it has more venom. She sleeps in on a Sunday—the only day the shop is closed—stirring around 10 because Ruairí is relentless, screeching in her ear, kneading at her belly, desperate for something to eat. Mindless, she feeds him, freshens up his water, makes herself a cup of coffee, pulls out a pastry leftover from Siobhan’s bake the day before, and settles into a spot by the window of her flat, overlooking the sea, all before thinking to take a look at her phone. 

Even if she goes 12 hours without looking at her phone, Lu finds she doesn’t miss much these days—she left home on a whim, without a ton of fanfare, and knows full well that she isn’t putting in the effort she should to keep in touch with friends from home. She also knows that’s why she left.

So, most mornings, she wakes up to a few messages in the family group chat, a message or two from her best friend Georgia, and not much else. This morning, it’s different. 

208 texts. 12 missed calls. 

Lu’s stomach sinks like a stone. Her whole body heats up at once. Her hands start shaking and her heart starts hammering, all before she even manages to swipe open a single notification. 

She doesn’t even have the wherewithal to cycle through possibilities. Her brain, hitting overdrive from the start, has no question that it’s bad. 

In WhatsApp, Lu finds that her family group chat has 206 messages. She has one separate text from her dad, and a final separate text from her brother. Nothing from her mom. 

Shaking, she swipes open her dad’s first. On the counter, Ruairí is sniffing at a banana. 

Hi, love, his message says. Figured the number of messages in the group chat is overwhelming. We’re at the hospital with Sam now. All is well, the appendix is out and he’s resting. Mary’s with us, she got back from Honduras yesterday. Good timing. Give us a call when you get a chance. 

From her brother, Lu finds a selfie. He’s in a hospital bed, gown around his shoulders. He looks pale, dark circles around his eyes, but he’s okay—he’s smiling, giving the camera a thumbs up. Underneath, the message says I lived, bitch. 

Relief coursing through her, Lu lets out a shaky laugh. It’s scarily on-brand for Sam to pull out a meme at a moment like this. 

Slowly but surely, Lu’s heartbeat slows to its normal rate. As it does, she scrolls back through the messages from the night before: her brother raising the alarm that he had a pesky pain in his side, their mother, a doctor herself, urging him to get it checked out. There’s a moment where Sam says the doctor is sending him home, and another where their mom urges him to demand an ultrasound, just in case. He does, and they find the appendicitis. Lu shudders to think what would’ve happened had her mother been the one sleeping soundlessly an ocean away. 

It’s five am in New York. Lu figures they’re all shattered. Rather than call and risk waking everyone up after what was surely a late, long night, Lu shoots off a text to her dad, asking him to call her when they wake up and sending lots of love. She turns her ringer up all the way so she won’t miss anything else. She feels a million miles away. 

####

On February first, Lu wakes up in a cold sweat. It’s still dark outside, but that doesn’t mean much in a place where the sun doesn’t rise until nearly 9am. Still, Lu doesn’t even need to look at a clock to know it must be early: perched on the pillow next to her head, Ruairí is snoring gently, dead to the world, not yet ready to demand breakfast. 

Heart hammering, Lu gropes around the bed until her hand closes around her phone, cold. She squints, then sighs, as she checks the time.

4:45am. 

Lu is no stranger to waking up mid-panic attack. Sometimes, it feels like choking—like she can’t get a breath down deep enough, to pool in the bottom of her lungs. Other times, it feels like an unavoidable urge to get up, move, get as far away from the space she woke up in as physically possible. Right now, it feels like a stomach ache, period pains, itchy skin, her body trying to tell her that something, somewhere, is going terribly wrong. 

Logically, she knows it’s not. She holds her breath, five, four, three, two, one, and checks her phone as her heart jackrabbits away. Nothing out of the ordinary: her mom texted a picture of her glass of wine with dinner to the family group chat, her dad reported the score of a soccer game, her brother sent that he’d managed to run a full two miles today, his furthest since the appendectomy. Everything is fine. 

Except for Lu. 

There’s no use trying to go back to sleep; Lu knows herself better than that. Heart still working overtime despite reassurance, she slips out of bed as gently as she can, praying that she won’t wake Ruairí. She’s silent as she gets dressed and silent as she tiptoes out of her bedroom, out of the apartment, and down the stairs. The morning is still and dark, but you can hear for miles and miles on Inis Mór, and as she begins her walk the soft, familiar sounds of tractors roaring to life, cows mooing for their breakfast, sheep and goats bleating, remind Lu that she’s not the only one—that others are here too, alive, beginning their day, pushing on. Home. And underneath it all, there is, always, the sound of the waves, constant, crashing against the shore. 

####

Lu doesn’t get a chance to nap. She walks, balancing on the edge of the cliffs that overlook the Atlantic, breathing in the sea air and thinking about how the water here, crashing, violent against the cliffs below her is the same water that once lapped up on the shores of Long Island, of Coney Island, of the Rockaways, of home. Seagulls swoop, low and graceful, over her head, over the ocean, and Lu thinks that if she asked her dad to drop a floatie into the Atlantic for her it just might make it—just might wash up here, on the edge of the Earth, the way she has. 

She walks and walks—you can walk all the way around Inis Mór and back in under five hours, but she doesn’t have that kind of time. She walks along the cliffs, the white, blinding, otherworldly geology of the Burren, through the grass and the mud and the cow shit, until she’s back at the cafe, windows glowing golden against the rising sun, condensation clinging to them from the inside. Siobhan is pulling pastries out of the oven when she opens the door around 6:30, and Ruairí, curled up on the counter, looks at her, bitter. 

Siobhan smiles, “There you are. No worries, pet, I’ve fed him his breakfast.” 

She wobbles through the day, exhausted from the panic, the walk, the lack of sleep. She messes up at least two orders—gives Mrs. Duffy whole milk instead of skim, drops Mr. Kennedy’s sandwich on the floor while she’s bringing it over to him—but, as always, no one bats an eye. They touch her arm gently, lull “oh, it’s no bother, darling, we’ll make it right, now,” and the cadence of their laughter carries as she does exactly that. There’s no venom, no rush, nothing to give Lu the adrenaline she so badly needs to make it through the day. 

Somehow, she almost forgets that it’s Niall’s first day. But all of a sudden it’s twelve hours later and he’s bustling inside, bringing a rush of cold air with him. The door swings shut behind him and Lu, who had been curled up at the cushioned window seat with Ruairí on top of her in a moment of quiet, jumps. The cat’s only just forgiven her for this morning, and her movement causes him to stalk off in anger. She sighs after him.

“Oh, no,” Niall laughs a little, “sorry, did I interrupt something?” He looks soft and sweet in his dark jeans, his hat pulled low over his forehead. He’s shedding his puffer jacket to reveal a navy blue cable knit sweater and his cheeks are flushed from the cold. His eyes, bright and blue as Lu remembers them, find hers. He smiles. 

“Yeah,” Lu just about manages. “He just forgave me, you totally ruined it.”

Niall barks out a laugh, head thrown back, shoulders hunching up. “What did you do?” 

“Forgot to feed him breakfast this morning,” Lu sighs. “Siobhan did it, but he held it against me anyway.” 

“Ah, well,” Niall shrugs. “I’d be mad too, if I were a cat.” 

“S’a good thing you’re not, then,” Lu smiles. “I’m not here to feed you.” 

Niall’s still giggling. Lu wonders if he ever stops. 

“I’m thinking I might make him pupcakes or something as an apology…” Lu is rambling a bit now, but she’s so tired, and Niall’s so cute, and nothing is real here, anyway. “I know they’re for dogs but I can’t imagine they’re bad for cats? I bet he’ll like those—honestly, I bet he’ll just like knowing I slaved over a hot stove for him. It’s like he can tell, you know?” 

It wasn’t meant to be that funny, but Niall is fully cackling, crinkles by his eyes on full display, one hand clutching his tummy. “You’re funny,” he says between laughs. “A bit looney, me da would say—hey, Lu, looney, Looney Tunes. It all makes sense.” 

“Isn’t ‘looney’ offensive?” The banter with him comes so easily, Lu doesn’t let herself overthink it. “Think we’re supposed to stop using it.” 

“Ah, well,” Niall’s pulling his guitar out to tune, now, “You’re in Ireland now, love. All good nicknames are a little offensive.”

####

The night is mostly quiet, a dozen customers at the most, which Lu thinks is probably good for Niall’s nerves. He’s just as stunning as he was the night Lu first met him, pulling out an arsenal of covers ranging from Bruce Springsteen to Post Malone, somehow making them all work for his voice, for the vibe, for everyone, but he’s shaking—she can see it when he pushes his hair off his forehead, or when he drops his pick on the floor between songs, laughing awkwardly as he bends to grab it. Even with the mistakes, the dropped pick, the few stumbles over lyrics, he’s endearing, engaging, all-consuming. Lu’s meant to be working, but she can’t find it in her to look away.

From her spot at the counter, Lu watches how Niall keeps his eyes trained on the window across from him. He doesn’t seem to be looking for anyone or anything, but Lu suspects it’s easier than looking his audience in the eye—despite the fact that she can see for herself just how captivated they are. It shouldn’t take an hour and a half to drink one coffee and eat one slice of chocolate cake, but that’s how long old Mr. Kane spends in the shop anyway, eyes closed, listening to Niall play. 

For two full hours, Niall keeps the shop warm and alive. Everyone is so captivated that Lu barely has to work after all; she leans up against the counter instead, cradling the mug of hot chocolate that Siobhan made her before she left for the night, and taking him in. She barely knows him, and yet. 

Lu has seen plenty of nervous first-timers performing in front of apathetic crowds—it was practically her job, after all. She’s also seen more than her fair share of world class performers stunning crowds that want to eat them up, keep them on stage forever, bottle their energy and carry it through the rest of their lives. Working in the music industry, even just as an assistant, for five years turned her hard and jaded, made her feel like she’s seen the seedy, rough, rude underbelly of it all—but she’s never seen anyone perform like Niall before. His unadulterated, all consuming love for music is tangible, even from across the room. This is now Niall communicates. This is how he understands the world. This is how he sees life. Half of Lu feels lucky to hear it—the other half feels sick knowing that his talent is wasted here.

It almost makes her sad to have to close up at 9. Niall’s good about it—he’s designed his set to last exactly two hours, finds a climax in the middle with “Dancing in the Dark” and tapers his song choices toward a slow but steady ending, letting everyone know, without having to say it, that it’s time to head home. Lu doesn’t even have to ask him if he knows how to play “Closing Time.” 

Mr. Kane is the last to leave, sticking around a little after nine to shake Niall’s hand and tell him he had no idea how talented Maura’s son is. He talks about Maura—Lu assumes she must be Niall’s mom—while Lu slowly, quietly begins putting dishes away. She likes the routine of this already, Niall’s quiet voice, his booming laugh, his warm presence keeping her company while she settles down for the night. It’s something she could get used to. It’s something, the first thing, she thinks she could miss, if she left. 

Niall masterfully leads his conversation with Mr. Kane toward goodbyes, shaking his hand again as he shuts the door behind him. Lu looks up from where she was rinsing a cup to watch as Niall watches through the window to make sure Mr. Kane gets in his car. He waits for the car to start before turning around, leaning his back up against the door, dragging a hand through his hair, and letting out a long sigh. 

“Alright?” Lu asks, gentle. Niall’s got his eyes closed, his head back, neck exposed to her. It’s thick and littered with freckles, and his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows. In her chest, Lu’s heart does something funny. She presses her thighs together, tight. 

Niall opens his eyes halfway, exhaling a little laugh as he meets Lu’s gaze. She hopes he can’t tell—how could he? 

“Yeah,” he says then, standing all the way up and shaking his head. “That was mad.” 

“It was amazing,” Lu counters. She gently places the mug back into the sink, bracing her hands against the edge. Part of her is afraid of what she’ll do without something between him and her. “They were so into it. No one could look away from you.”

Her cheeks flush, and Niall catches it. The corner of his mouth pulls up in half a smile as he shoves his hands into his pockets. “Ya think so?” 

“I know so,” Lu presses her lips together, but it doesn’t do much to prevent her smile. “‘Dancing In The Dark’ was my favorite one; it’s perfect for your voice.” 

“Thanks, Looney Tunes,” Niall hums, making his way back over toward her. “Can I help ya clean up? I wash, you dry?”

“Oh,” Lu stills. She’d half forgotten about the dishes still left to clean, the floor to sweep, the leftovers to toss, the counters to wipe down. Her mind stumbles over the best way to go about this: it would be rude to keep him, but, God, she wants his company. She realizes, with a slight swoop in her belly, that she hasn’t felt homesick in two hours. She needs him to stay. “I actually—I have a dishwasher. I just like to rinse everything before I put it in.” 

Niall smiles. He comes around the counter to stand next to Lu at the sink, knocking his hip against hers. “Sensible,” he says. It’s quiet. Just for her. “I’ll rinse and put ‘em in. You’ve been stood here all night. What else do you have to do?” 

“Uh,” Lu feels like her whole body is vibrating. Her mind turns over itself like an engine that won’t start. “Sweep the floors, wipe down the counters, lock up.” 

“Alright,” Niall is so close that Lu can smell his aftershave. Warm, soft, mixed with sweat from his nerves and the smell of his skin. “Let’s do it.”

####

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[scullysexual]

Time Can Heal (6/ )

Season Two | Abduction Arc | Canon Divergence | Angst |

One | Two | Three | Four | Five | AO3 |

Mulder realises his quest for the truth costs too much.

Tagging: @today-in-fic @bevh78 @mypanicface @weseeusinthefall 

[In which it is time to intervene]

- - - 

When the phone rings, Dana isn’t in the mood to answer it. It was late anyway, past 10:00 when she last looked at the clock, the only other person who used to call her this late doesn’t bother with her at all anymore.

If she had the courage to wear an elastic band around her wrist she would snap it against her wrist. Thoughts of Mulder were bad and she was trying to never go there, it only made her miserable.

The phone goes to voicemail but no message is left, instead the caller tries calling again.

Only then does Dana pick it up, huffing as she does so, apparently the person on the other end doesn’t understand she’s not in the mood to talk.

“Dana, hi. What are you still doing awake?”

It’s her mother and immediately it has Dana feeling guilty at wanting her to go away.

“Um…just catching up on some work.”

It was a lie, there was no work to be seen, she makes sure to keep that in the office now.

She was doing nothing actually, nothing but sitting on her couch. There were thoughts to turn the TV on but she hadn’t quite acquired the energy to press buttons on the remote.

“I just wanted to check in with you,” her mother says on the other end. “Is everything okay? You haven’t called in a while.”

Dana used to call her mother every weekend (if she was home). She hadn’t exactly stopped doing that but lately it had been using to much energy to talk and pretend everything was okay when it really, really wasn’t. One look around her apartment would tell her that; take-out containers everything, dishes piling up in the sink, two weeks’ worth of laundry still to be done. She couldn’t hide behind the excuse of ‘too much work’, there was never too much, not anymore, she just did not want to do it.

Maybe part of it was in rebellion. Mulder had made her apartment all nice and pretty for her to return to so it was her job to make it a mess, to erase any notion that he was ever here.

There she was thinking about Mulder again.

“I’m good,” Dana says. “I’ve just been busy.” There’s another lie. She was getting as good as Mulder’s conspirators.

“Good,” Maggie says though she sounds a little off. “I was thinking of coming around on the weekend. Will you be home?”

Dana tries not to audibly sigh. Her mother coming around would mean she would need to clean her apartment otherwise Maggie will definitely know something is amiss.

Dana’s not even sure why she’s hiding it from her mother exactly.

“It’s okay,” Dana says. “I’ll come round to you.” Yes, that’s better. She can shut the door on her apartment and nobody has to know anything more.

“It’s really no bother me coming—”

“Mom, it’s fine,” Dana says, cutting her mother off. “I’ll go to you.” Her tone leaves no arguments.

“Well, I’ll see you on Saturday then.”

“See you Saturday.”

She hangs up, placing the phone back in its place then looks at it. Mulder got her that, he replaced her last one. Another reminder of Mulder. Maybe she should get rid of it.

.:.:.:.:.:.:.

Talking was never one of Dana’s strongest points. She kept things bottled up and locked in a box at the back of her brain. Her problems were her own, it was nobody else job to deal with them.

But then somebody invented the therapist profession and then it did become somebody’s job.

“I heard you were placed in a new department,” Karen- you can call me Karen, there’s no need for formalities here, Dana- tells her. “How’s that working for you?”

Horrible, Dana thinks.

Instead she says. “It’s okay. It’s not that different from the X-Files.”

Karen smiles, nodding.

They fall silent, Dana choosing to look around the office. A bookshelf, some personal items on the shelves, Karen Kosseff’s diploma sitting nicely in a picture frame hanging off the wall. Dana hadn’t put her up when she had an office in Quantico, she thought about it but decided against it, she doesn’t actually know why.

“What about your new co-workers?” Karen asks. “Are they treating you fairly?”

Of course not. Haven’t you heard, I’m Mrs Spooky.

Instead Dana shrugs. “I guess they’re treating me as they would any newbie.”

Karen nods again, writes something down in her notepad.

Dana sighs, looking towards the clock on the wall. How long was this session supposed to be again?

Karen follows her eyeline.

“Do you have somewhere else you need to be?”

Caught off guard and feeling guilty, Dana answers. “No, it’s just…”

Karen nods, understanding. “We can stop here if that’s what you want. Pick off next Wednesday.”

It’s mandatory these sessions be an hour long but Karen is giving her an out.

So Dana takes it. She nods, Karen smiles, and Dana leaves hoping next Wednesday never comes.

.:.:.:.:.:.

“Where have you been?”

Hello to you too, Davis.

“I had something to do.”

His feet are on her desk. She looks at them pointedly but Davis is too dumb to realise.

“Don’t you have your own desk to put your feet on, Davis?”

He sighs like it’s the biggest thing she could ask of him.

“Alright. You don’t need to be such a bitch about it.” He moves his feet, deliberately knocking her pot of pens over. Dana glares at him as she moves to pick it up.

“Fuller wants you in his office,” he tells her.

“What for?” she asks, half intrigued, half concerned.

“I don’t know, I’m not your fucking messenger.”

She rolls her eyes, mutters asshole under her breath.

“Did you say something?” Davis asks.

“Nothing you need to worry about,” she answers making her way to Fuller’s office. She knocks on the door.

“Come in.” She opens the door. “Took your time,” Fuller says upon seeing her.

Dana shuts the door and sits down in one of the chairs.

“Sorry, I had a meeting.”

Fuller makes some noise.

“Well, it’s your lucky day,” he tells her. “You’re going on your first field trip with VCS.”

This early, Dana wonders. It’s been a month, she thought they would give her more time.

“Why me?” she asks.

“You were requested. Consider it part of your probation.”

“Where am I going?”

“Minneapolis,” Fuller says smiling. “You won’t be going alone, however. Davis will go with you.”

She tries not to audibly groan, tries not to show that she is in any way dissatisfied with that.

“Is there nobody else?” she tries instead.

“He’s a senior agent, you’re not. Not here, at least. You’ll need someone to guide you.”

Guide me. Like I haven’t done this before.

“There are plenty of senior agents. Why does it have to be him?”

Fuller sighs and leans forward. “It’s him because I said it’s him. Is that alright with you?”

She laces her fingers together beneath the table, resists the urge to push his face away.

“Yes, sir.”

Fuller smiles. “Good.” He leans back in the chair. “You leave Monday. Please let Davis know.”

Dana gets up from the chair and leaves the office.

“You been fired yet?” Davis asks pretending to do some work.

“We’re going to Minneapolis,” Dana responds.

Davis smiles brightly. “Looks like we’re about to be partners, sweetheart.”

Out of all the agents in this goddamn department why did it have to be him?

.:.:.:.:.

A file is placed down on his desk, delivered personally by Cavanagh himself.

Mulder looks at the file then at Cavanagh.

“What’s this?” he asks.

“I got a call from your FBI building. Somebody higher up asking if I had any cases that could do with some help and I was told to put you on the case,” Cavanagh explains to him.

Mulder opens the file up. His breath catches in his throat momentarily at the crime scene photograph that stares up at him. An unearthed grave and a mutilated body. Mulder regains his posture and closes the file.

“Not a pretty sight,” Cavanagh says with a grimace. “Anyway, people from VCS are coming up on Monday.”

“Do you know who they are?”

“Didn’t mention any names. Bocks will work on it with you.”

At the mention of his name, Bocks swivels over. He takes the file as Cavanagh walks back to his office.

VCS, Mulder thinks with a grump. I swear to god if it’s Colton…

VCS was the most logical department to assist them. Mulder had witnessed this type of thing before. They were usually good cases, gruesome, but interesting. Maybe it was a chance for Mulder to do some decent profiling, stretch those muscles again.

“Whoa,” says Bocks who is now looking at the photos. “Think I’m gonna give MUFON a call.”

Mulder frowns, turning to his partner. “Why?”

The phone in his hand, Bocks explains. “Looks like the literature, doesn’t it?”

“The literature?”

A wary glance towards the office, lowering his voice.

“The hair and nails have been cut away, like in the cattle mutilations.”

Mulder looks at the photograph. He guesses he can see why Bocks has made that leap but he shakes his head.

“Aliens didn’t do this.”

“Well, how can you be so sure?”

Mulder picks on the photographs up. He knows the work of a very disturbed person when he sees one.

.:.:.:.:.:.:.

She’s just about finished packing when there’s a knock at her door.

Spying her gun on the bed, Dana picks it up and cautiously moves towards the door. The gun beside her but her fingers ready on the trigger, she looks through the peep hole.

Relief spreads through her when she sees her mother. Removing her fingers from the trigger, she unlocks the door, pulling back the chain.

“Hi, Mom,” she says.

“Hi.” Maggie smiles, her smile leaves her when her eyes fall to the gun in Dana’s hand. “Why are you holding your gun?”

Dana looks down at it to, moving it around like she’s never seen it before.

“Um…I was just getting ready to pack it,” she answers. She opens the door more, allowing her mother entry, and walks back over to her bedroom where a suitcase lies on her bed.

Maggie follows, hanging in the doorway as Dana begins busying herself with packing the last few things.

“You didn’t come over yesterday.”

Shit. Dana pauses. She had forgotten all about that.

“I was going to call but you’ve seemed off lately so I decided I’d see you in person.”

“I’m sorry,” Dana apologises. “I forgot.” Not a complete lie. “They’re sending me to Minnesota, I was catching up on the case.” A lie. They wouldn’t get information on the case until they arrived.

“I see,” Maggie says. “Is it not too soon for you to be out in the field?”

It’s been a month. Two if you include from when she came out of her coma.

“They think I’m ready.”

“Do you think you’re ready?”

Dana has thought about that a lot since she was assigned this case. She came to the conclusion last night that yes, she does feel ready. A change of scenery might be good for her.

“I think so.”

Maggie smiles. “Well, I’m glad to hear.” She goes to move away from the doorway but stops. Dana waits wondering what else her mother has to say.

“Do you know when you’ll be back?”

Dana shakes her head.

“Well, I was hoping you would come to church with me when you got back.”

Church, Dana thinks with a heaviness in her chest. Her cross still sits against her skin. After wearing it for fifteen years she forgets it there but there are some moments were it is heavy against her chest. Suddenly cold with the reminder that you missed mass last Sunday or you haven’t been in a while, maybe you should go?

It became a habit to ignore her faith whenever she knew she wasn’t doing so good. Her strengths came from herself not from others or a religion. Mostly, she was scared she would become dependent upon it, so she just ignored it all together. It was easier that way, safer.

“Yeah, maybe,” Dana says nodding because maybe if she says it aloud to someone she might actually follow through with it.

“Well, I’ll let you get on with your packing,” Maggie says, moving away from the door now.

Dana looks at her suitcase and at the clock. She was done packing, there was still some time left.

“Stay for a bit,” she tells her mother. Her apartment was finally clean. 3am this morning with a sudden burst of motivation. Turns out it wasn’t that difficult after all.

Dana motions for her mother to sit down.

“Do you want something to drink?”

“Tea, please.”

Dana does that, putting the kettle on the stove and tries not to think of how many lies she’s just told.

[agentmarymargaretskitz]

To Be or Not to Be?

Sequel to Let’s Make a Deal. Two days after an attack on Neron fails and the demon possesses Gary, Ava gets a call from Gary himself explaining that Neron has left his body and that he's himself again. But is he really?

(Special thanks to the Constangreen discord for helping me finish this. And for causing a fair amount of Adam thirsting)

Ao3

              Ava watched as agents filed into the Bureau’s offices as the day began. Every so often, she glanced over to a pair of desks close to her own office. Two days ago, John Constantine had tumbled into the Bureau with Desmond and told her and the Legends that Gary had been possessed by Neron. Even though they only had John’s word to go off of, Gary still hadn’t showed up for work since that day the Legends thought they could finally send him back to hell. She had tried calling him twice yesterday, but it had gone straight to voicemail. If he didn’t show up today…

The phone on her desk began to ring, and Ava turned to pick it up. “Hello?”

“…hey, Ava.”

She nearly dropped the phone. “Gary? What…where...is it you?”

“Yeah,” Gary sounded exhausted. “It’s me. Really me.”

“But Constantine said you were possessed?”

“I was, but Neron ditched me yesterday. He went into a guy delivering food for me.”

“Oh,” Ava nodded. “Okay. If he’s gone, then I’m still going to need you to come into work. You missed the debrief yesterday and we need to know as much of what happened to you as you can remember. The sooner the better, because Hank is really on my case since the whole attack on Neron deal.”

“Oh…okay. I’ll be there, Ava.”

“We’re on the clock, Agent Green,” Ava reminded him. “It’s Director Sharpe.”

“Yes. Sorry about that. I’ll get there as soon as I can.”

“Good.”

              The call disconnected and Ava breathed a sigh of relief. Gary was okay now. She’d been a little concerned yesterday about him. The good news is that they had another body on their side. However, Neron was still totally off the grid. Hell, he could have been in Constantine for all she knew since he had mentioned that Neron took away his protections. Wherever he was now, Ava doubted that he was still in Gary. As loyal as he was, he was probably too…Gary for Neron to want to stick around in.

~~~

Gary showed up at the Bureau almost an hour after he’d called in, and it was through the main entrance. Ava had forgotten about him until she got another call that he’d arrived before going down to meet him.

“Director Sharpe, I’m so sorry I’m late,” he babbled, narrowly avoiding running into a post. “My Uber got caught in traffic.”

Ava sighed. “Gary, you have a time courier. Why didn’t you just use that?”

“Oh,” Gary grinned sheepishly, but he didn’t look much like his normal self beyond that. His suit was a little rumpled and his tie askew. There was no way that he’d shaved since he’d gone missing. His glasses were also nowhere to be seen. He wasn’t slouching in on himself so much either.

“Gary, where is your courier?” Ava asked, waiting for her answer.

“The courier,” Gary nodded and she was sure that he was about to go into a long explanation. “Um, so I kinda gave it to Constantine when Neron possessed me. Figured that I, you know, better not have it with me if a demon’s pulling my strings. Although that’s not really the case anymore since I’m pretty sure he’s in my delivery guy. I should have made sure he was okay, but then I passed out and-”

“Gary!” Ava cut him off. “Relax. Good move on not letting the demon get access to a courier. Bad news is paperwork to get you another will take a while. I’ll get someone started on it. Just head on up, the debrief from yesterday is on your desk.”

“That’s all?”

“Yeah, pretty much,” Ava nodded. “Just head on up and get back to work.”

“Okay.”

“Good,” Ava turned and made her way towards the elevator to check on the magical creature containment units. “And don’t be late again tomorrow.”

“Yeah, sorry. I promise it won’t happen again…”

Ava was almost to the elevator when she heard something else at the end of the sentence.

“Bitch.”

The blonde spun around, but all she saw was Gary heading to the offices. She shook her head and pressed the call button. There was no way that Gary had said that, right? In his words that he’s told her many times, he had way too much respect and fear of her to even call her that point blank. Perhaps she was only hearing things.

But why was she hearing them in Gary’s voice?

~~~

Nate was looking over the newsletter that Ray had sent from the Waverider when he caught a flash of moment sliding into his vision. “Gary?”

The geeky Time Agent had a strained smile on his face. “Hey, Nate.”

Nate shook his head in disbelief. “But-but you…Neron-”

“Possessed me,” Gary finished. “Well, he didn’t stick around for long. He went into the guy who was delivering my food instead. He’s probably still in him.”

“Geez,” Nate grimaced. “So Neron is using someone else as a meat sack now? Poor guy.”

“Sure,” Gary nodded, taking a seat behind his desk.

“I’m going to tell the Legends about this. The sooner they track Neron down, the sooner this mess ends and he can be sent back to hell.”

“Well, I told Ava, er, Director Sharpe already. She’s probably already sent a message to the Waverider.”

              Gary did have a point. Ava always was on top of things in the office. Working with her more made him understand why Rip had put so much trust in her. She knew when she needed to step up and do something. Whether that was clone programming or not, it made her an excellent leader. Hopefully his father would realize that sooner than later and stop pestering her so much.

“Eh, I’ll send them a message anyways so they know Neron’s jumped into another body. Besides, they’ll be pleased to hear he’s out of you.”

“Great,” Gary smiled slowly. “You do that.”

An involuntary shudder ran through Nate. “Hey, how long has Neron been out of you?”

Gary frowned. “Well, I’m not totally sure. Because I remember talking to Constantine about sending Neron to hell. Then it was darkness for a while, like I was asleep. I…woke up at my apartment and there was a delivery guy there with black smoke going into his mouth. I didn’t get a good look at his face though because I passed out. But then I woke up and it was morning and I was late for work so I called Av- Director Sharpe. And now I’m here.”

He spread his arms out in a flourish, the smile returning to his face.

“Huh,” Nate said. “John told us you made a deal with Neron. Why would he leave you?”

“He was?” Gary sounded surprised. “I mean, I dunno. Maybe I was too weak of a host. But Constantine asked about me?”

“Yeah,” Nate replied, slowly turning his focus to his computer with the intention of marking the report of Neron’s attack and Gary’s possession as closed. With Gary back and himself again, there was no need to keep it open. “He seemed pretty worried about you. Kept saying that it was his fault. You know, this might be your shot at getting back together since he cares about you so much.”

“He cares about me?” Gary mused, stroking his unshaven chin. “Well, that is an opportunity for something.”

~~~

              Something was different lately at work. When Mona got down to the magical creature’s cells, there was a weird kind of energy in their air. Everyone seemed on edge when she came to visit them. The leprechaun was muttering about a ‘Wishweaver’ being close by but wouldn’t say anything beyond that. Baba Yaga didn’t come out of her chicken-legged hut as she usually did when Mona entered the room. Even the baby chimera seemed scared, and she was not a shy one. Once that happened, Mona was certain something was brewing again at the Bureau.

“Maybe you’ll feel better after eating,” she said kindly to the little monster as she left. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Eris!”

              She walked back out into the hallway and pushed the cart down the hallway to greet her next change. Even though Nora wasn’t next, Mona still couldn’t help but feel excited about the latest love letter she was delivering to the witch from Ray. They were definitely more of a Monica and Chandler than Ross and Rachel the more she watched their relationship bloom. She’d have to mention that at the wedding, whenever it happened.

              Her thoughts on the two lovebirds screeched to a halt when Mona turned the corner and saw someone standing in the hallway. Her hand fell to her side to grab the pepper spray she’d started bringing to work. If this was another man in black trying to kidnap a creature, she was going to be ready. Even if the creatures were prisoners, she would protect them from harm with her life. But then the man turned, and Mona realized there was no reason for alarm.

“Gary?” she questioned as he started walking towards her. “What are you doing here? Or are you even Gary? I heard about what happened to you. I’m warning you, I have an exorcism recorded that I will use!”

“The demon’s gone, Mona,” Gary chuckled. “He’s been gone for two days. It’s just me again.”

“Oh,” Mona relaxed, her hand falling away from the pepper spray. “Well, why are you down here?”

“Couldn’t sit still for long. I felt like stretching my legs and decided to take a walk through down here.”

“Ah,” Mona nodded. “Cool. I almost didn’t recognize you. You look a lot different now.”

“There’s a reason for that,” Gary told her “Neron broke my glasses, so I’ve been using contacts. And I ran out of razors, so I’m trying the beard out.”

“You look great,” Mona told him, but his look just contributed to the creepy energy she’d been feeling around the containment units since yesterday. “I’ll see you around. Gotta make sure that everyone gets their lunch.”

“Of course,” Gary’s smile slipped into place too easy before he walked off.

Mona turned to watch him go, noting that Baba Yaga started screeching in her cell once Gary walked by it.

~~~

              Nora set her book down and rubbed at her eye. As much as she appreciated the steady flow of literature that Mona provided her, sometimes she just needed a break from the story. The latest chapter had featured a very intense scene between the two main characters in a forest that made her nostalgic for freedom. She knew she belonged in the cell though, that her penance was her first step on the path of redemption. But it had been so long since she had felt the sun on her skin.

              With a sigh, she stretched out to the foot of her bed to retrieve the note Mona had delivered to her yesterday. Even though she’d already read it three times, the content was worth another reread. Ray was sweet to keep sending her letters while she was in here. Each one told of the exploits of the Legends that made her feel like she was on the Waverider instead of a cell at the Time Bureau. She wished she could sneak herself into an envelope and be delivered to the ship like Ray had done.

              A faint tang of sulfur hit her nostrils when Nora straightened up, accompanied by the feeling of being watched. She knew there were cameras above watching her every move, but this was different. It felt exactly like when she was growing up in the cult with Mallus’s influence wrapped tightly around her. Nora slowly turned to look at the door of her cell, where Gary Green was staring at her through the glass. She sent a glare his way, hoping it would get him to scram.

A lazy smile flitted over his face before his eyes turned completely red.

              Nora flinched back as Gary slid out of sight, astonished. Gary wasn’t one to lurk around this area, which made his presence down here already unusual. It was his eyes that really tipped her off though. Her eyes had looked the same whenever she’d passed by a mirror while Mallus was in control. If Gary’s eyes were like that…then someone else was pulling Gary’s strings.

Next time Mona came around, Nora was going to tell her about this.

~~~

              Dez thumbed through one of the magazines a Time Bureau agent had provided him. Spending what felt like years in hell and then months with no control over his body had gotten him out of the loop on everything. So while he recovered from the possession in the Bureau’s medical center, Dez was making sure he was catching up on what he could. As bad as everything was in the world, at least it was a lot better than being in hell.

              While he was glad that John had been spared a little longer Neron’s wrath, Dez had been worrying about the aftermath of Neron leaving his body. The guy the demon had ditched him for hadn’t left his mind since it happened. He’d been pretty brave to stick his neck out for John like that. Dez wondered a little if he’d had a bit of a crush on John, not that he could blame him. Not everyone would offer themselves up to a demon like that.

              That poor man was going through so much torment right now. The thing with Neron was that he targeted purity. Dez remembered how everything he loved or cared about was broken apart in his mind by the demon. He’d never felt so much hate in his life before. It had been suffocating. Sometimes he hadn’t been sure if it was his hate or Neron’s.

              Sighing, he glanced through the glass wall of the medical wing at the agents walking past. The doctor has told him that it was a one-way mirror that only he could see though, but one of the agents had stopped in front of it to stare at him. It took a moment before Dez recognized him as the man who’d agreed to let Neron possess him. The glasses were gone and he had a beard now, but it was the same man. He tilted his head to the side, regarding Dez as if he was able to see him instead of his reflection.

“Go away,” Dez muttered, even though he knew the man couldn’t hear him.

The man smiled smugly and winked. A ripple passed over his face, revealing a different one for a moment.

Neron.

Dez’s eyes rolled back as he fainted.

~~~

“While you were out, Director Sharpe sent a transmission to the ship,” Gideon announced as the Legends filed back onto the Waverider. “And it is one the whole team can view, Captain.”

“Thanks, Gideon,” Sara muttered as Charlie tossed her a smug grin. “You hold up okay while we were stuck in Roanoke?”

“It was a great deal quieter without you lot, although it is good you all returned alive.”

“We missed you too, Gideon,” Zari told the AI. “And I missed pants.”

“I missed Wi-Fi,” Ray chimed in.

“And I missed the game,” Mick muttered.

Sara rolled her eyes at the team as they entered the parlor. “Gideon, roll the message. Hopefully iy’s good news.”

“And something about where Neron is,” John mumbled as he slunk in last. He’d been in a bad funk since the attempt to send Neron back to hell ended with Gary getting possessed.

The hologram of Ava appeared in the center of the room. “Hey, Sara. I know you said you wouldn’t be on the Waverider during the latest mission. I’m hoping you get this soon. There’s some good news back here. Gary’s Gary again. He told us that Neron ditched him for another body. The bad news is that we have no idea who is it beyond a delivery guy and where they are now. We’re looking into it now, but John can stop worrying about Gary. Anyway, just wanted to give you a quick update on that. Give me a call when you have the chance.”

As Ava disappeared, Ray smiled at everyone else. “Well, if Gary’s free, that’s good news.”

“But Neron’s still running around out there,” Zari reminded him. “And they don’t know where he is now.”

John shook his head. “I do, and we need to get back to the Bureau. Everyone there is in danger.”

“Why?” Mick asked. “It’s not like Time Dweeb’s possessed anymore.”

“Sharpie might think that, but she’s wrong,” John told them. “Neron wouldn’t give up a body just like that, especially one that he got from a deal. Not to mention that he’s also a demon. They lie and manipulate to get what they want. There’s a wolf in the herd and the Bureau doesn’t even know it.”

Sara held up a hand. “Hang on, are you saying Gary’s still possessed?”

John nodded.

“He’s right,” Charlie agreed. “We have to warn them. He’s in close proximity to more magical creatures now. If he decides to strike, then a lot of people are going to get hurt and die.”

“Including Nora,” Ray paled. “And Nate.”

“Ava too,” Sara turned to John. “You’re certain that Neron is still inside Gary?”

“Positive.”

“Then everyone needs to strap in,” Sara announced, heading toward her chair. “Gideon, we’re going back to the future.”

~~~

“I can’t believe this,” Ava shook her head as she and Nate walked into the Bureau’s offices with the Legends. “You really think Neron is still inside Gary? He told us himself that he went into another body.”

“Oh, so his word’s good enough?” John mocked. “Brilliant! Then we’ll all go home because surely a demon couldn’t be lying to you!”

“Easy,” Sara glared at him.

But John wasn’t done yet. “Did either of you even think to test him to see if he was still possessed? Or do you just care about him so little? That he’s another expendable agent to you, Director Sharpe.”

Ava turned and glared. “I have enough to deal with already, Constantine! Maybe I heard something, but I wasn’t sure! And I don’t need you blaming me when it’s your fault he got possessed in the first place.”

“You’ve got a lot of nerve-”

“STOP!” Zari suddenly shouted.

A hush fell over the entire room. Agents were staring at them before slowly resuming their work.

“This isn’t going to help us find him,” Zari spoke up. “You can point fingers later. Right now, we just need to find Gary.”

“Who’s looking for me?”

              The group turned around to see the man they were looking for. Gary was staring at all of them, looking confused. John was surprised to see how much his appearance had changed since he’d left him behind. He looked hotter, but that was marred by the knowledge that a demon was in charge.

“Why are the Legends here?” Gary asked, pointing to all of them. “Is something wrong, Director?”

“Game’s up, you demon bastard,” John spoke through gritted teeth.

He had the audacity to look hurt. “Constantine, what’s going on?”

“Gary,” Nate sighed. “You need to cooperate. I’ve got your back, bro, but they think you’re possessed still.”

“But-but-but,” Gary shook his head. “I’m not! He left me! I told you! I know I can’t remember the guy’s face, but Neron’s in him now and I-”

              While he babbled away, John lunged forward with a canister. He flicked the open end out toward Gary, water splashing his face. There was a sizzle as the liquid met his skin. Gary howled, clutching his face and stumbling backwards. Nate and Ray, who’d yelled at him for not following along with the plan, stopped and watched as Gary slowly looked back up at them. There were patches of red on his face where the holy water had hit, and his eyes were pure red.

“Gary…” Ava trailed off, unable to finish the sentence.

“There is no Gary,” he said, smiling cruelly. “Only Neron.”

Mick pulled out his heat gun as the other agents around the office pulled out their own weapons, all aimed at Neron.

“Cute,” the demon chuckled. “But pathetic.”

He threw his arms out. A force threw everyone and everything backwards. A few light fixtures popped and showered sparks. John groaned as he hit the floor, but he was one of the luckier ones. Most of the agents and Legends were unconscious. He heard a scream and saw one agent with his leg pinned under an overturned desk.

“You know, I’m almost glad you busted my cover,” Neron said, leaning down beside John. “It was so hard to have to be good and meek constantly and not rip someone’s guts out. I have never let so many people walk all over me in a host before. But I was in the perfect place, and you went and blew it!”

“Sucks for you,” John wheezed, grinning as he raised his hand.

“Oh no, no exorcisms here,” Neron snapped his fingers and a reel of tape wound itself around his head and over his mouth. “I’m sure you understand, Connie.”

John tried to lunge at him, but Neron stood up and kicked him back down.

“You…really did call me a bitch that day,” Ava snarled from where she was leaning over an unconscious Sara. “It was you all along.”

Neron turned and slow clapped for her. “Bravo, Ava. Gold star for you.”

“You possessed our friend,” Ava raised her gun at him.

“Wow, sweetheart, nothing escapes you,” Neron taunted. “You know, I wasn’t so sure about him at first. But he was right about no one really noticing him. It’s been a week and you’re only realizing today that poor little Gary isn’t the one in charge. You call yourselves his ‘friends’, but are you really? I let my personality slip through a few times and none of you noticed a thing! You just kept going about your business like nothing was wrong!”

“I just thought he was processing what happened to him,” Nate protested beside a desk.

“You’ve got to be a better liar than that, Nathaniel. Gary might not be in the driver’s seat, but he’s got the seat of the house in this ride. He’s seen everything this week. Poor sap knows how little you’ve noticed how different Gary was acting. He already knew that he was annoying and a pest to you, but to be brushed off after I told any of you I was just Gary again? It made him cry to be reaffirmed that no one cares. I mean, did any of you ask once during the week if he was okay?”

John looked at Nate and Ava, who sported guilty looks along with a few other agents. Reaching up, he started to work at clawing the tape away from his mouth.

“Exactly,” Neron grinned. “But hey, that’s what his friends do, right?”

“Shut up!” Ava snarled. “Get out of him!”

The demon looked unimpressed. “I’m sorry, does that usually work for you, Director? It could for Gary, but it’s useless with me.”

“Gary,” Zari said from somewhere in the back. “If you can hear us-”

“Save it,” Neron cut her off. “He knows you don’t really care. He’s accepting that I was right about you all. That none of you really care about Gary Green. And why should you?”

John had one lip free when Neron turned and smiled down at him. “Actually, scratch that. One person does care about him.”

“You’re a sick bastard,” John tried to say, although his voice was still a bit muffled by the tape when Neron dropped down to his level.

“I know,” Neron nodded. “I’m the King of Hate, I’ve heard it all before. But you were the one person who knew something wasn’t quite right with old Gary here.”

“I’ve dealt with more demons. I rely on holy water and salt, not word of mouth.”

“Smart man,” Neron praised, cradling John’s face in his hand. “When I was going to possess you last week, I figured that it would be fun to torture you in the same headspace. But now I see I don’t have to do that. I can keep riding Gary here while I enact my plan. You can watch someone you love suffer all over again.”

John wanted to hang his head, but Neron was forcing him to look up at Gary’s face.

“And as you watch the Earth fall apart and the Legends die, remember how you walked away to try and save him, but that it ultimately made him mine.”

Neron let him go and ambled towards the agent with his leg pinned under the desk.

“Gary…Gary…” the man pleaded.

“Gary isn’t here!” Neron roared at him. “McNeil, right? Not very bright for agent of the month, are we?”

McNeil was trembling. “What do you want?”

“Your time courier,” Neron demanded. “Quickly. I’ve been needed a new one since this idiot gave his away and the paperwork is still being filed for me to have a replacement. So, yours will do nicely.”

The agent hesitated. “I can’t do that.”

Neron sighed. “I’m going to be honest here, McNeil. I don’t like you. Gary doesn’t like you. He’s always been hoping to show you up someday. He said he’d be coming for you once when you won agent of the month again. Now he doesn’t have the balls to go through with it, but I do. Don’t worry, I won’t hurt you.”

McNeil relaxed.

“I’ll kill you first.”

“No!” Ava screamed.

John shut his eyes before he heard McNeil’s scream become a gurgle and several sickening noises. When he reopened his eyes, the demon’s suit and face were spattered with blood. A bloody time courier was in his hands. John looked at him instead of letting his eyes drift down to McNeil’s body, not wanting to see the damage that had been done. Neron smiled at him as he opened a doorway to an alleyway.

“Don’t worry. I won’t be gone for long. Just need to see some old friends,” he told them, tossing something from his pocket to the ground. “But here’s a reminder that you’re not getting Gary back.”

              With that, he stepped through and closed the door behind him. The room was completely silent before Nate, who’d been in closest proximity to McNeil, grabbed a trash can and vomited. Ava was rising to her feet, the unfired gun still in her hand. Everyone else was slowly coming to around the room, trying to crawl out of the wreckage. John got up and approached the object that Neron had thrown to the floor while Ava and Nate helped the others.

On the carpet, with McNeil’s blood on them, were Gary’s smashed glasses.

              Neron called them a reminder that Gary was gone. John didn’t see them that way. For him, they were a tangible motivation. He was going to go after Neron, whether the Bureau and Legends would be with him or not. Whatever it took, he’d do it to drive the demon out of Gary and send it straight back to hell.

“I’m coming after you,” he promised, pocketing the glasses before going to see the extent of the damage that had been done to the Bureau’s office.

[cheryl-in-a-barrel]

Leave A Message - Choni Oneshot

Read on Ao3 

Cheryl feels the first tear roll down her cheek when she’s 15 seconds into Toni’s first voicemail. There are 9 more messages to follow, but she doesn’t know how the hell she’s going to get through them when she’s already crying on the first.

“Hey…I just left the hospital and you weren’t there? The doctor said you went home with your mom but something about that just doesn’t sound right. I’m coming over to yours now, I know your mom will want to kill me if I show up there, but i just have to make sure you’re okay. Call me back when you get this.”

Cheryl lowers the phone down from her ear, and clicks onto the next message with a sniffle, wiping at her eyes even though the action is useless against the inevitable tears that are sure to continue.

“Okay, something’s definitely wrong. Your mom said you’re in Switzerland?? I know she’s lying but the thought of you being so far away still really freaked me out. Is that…weird? I just never want to be that far away from you, ever. I don’t know where you are, but I swear I’m going to find you, okay? Please if you get these messages, call me.”

Cheryl takes a shaky breath as the message ends. Toni’s voice sounded so worried, even scared, and the knowledge that she was so anxious over Cheryl’s whereabouts, pulls at the girl’s heartstrings. She’s never, in her entire life had someone worry over her like that. Even Jason, for as much as he loved her, had too many of his own problems to be fussing over Cheryl all the time. He cared about her, of course, but Cheryl never heard that kind of pure concern in Jason’s voice for her.

She gets up from her desk chair, and shuffles over to sit on her bed. Once she’s seated cross legged right in the middle of her queen sized mattress, Cheryl presses down on the next message.

“Hey, it’s me again. It’s been hours…and I’ve asked around but no one’s heard from you since yesterday. You’re really starting to scare me. You were…so paranoid about your mom and uncle… god, Cher did they hurt you? I don’t even want to think about that, but it’s starting to look more and more likely. I actually wish you were in Switzerland right now, at least you’d be safe there, but now, for all I know you’re in pain or something and I just, I don’t know how to help you. I’m not going to stop until I find you though. I’ll force my way into Thistlehouse for answers if I need to. Don’t worry, Cheryl, I’m coming.”

A small smile appears across Cheryl’s lips as she hears Toni’s determined words echo through the speaker. That’s her girl, stubborn as always. She admires Toni so much for the way she never backs down from a challenge. The serpent girl would do absolutely anything for the people she cares about, and Cheryl is forever grateful for that fact. She doesn’t know why Toni decided to care about her, of all people, but she’ll spend the rest of her life showing Toni her gratitude.

“Hey...last night was hell. I can’t sleep knowing you’re probably in danger. I talked to the serpents about it, and Sweet Pea and Fangs were so down to help me break down the door to Thistlehouse and interrogate your mom…but the more I thought about that, the more I realized that’s probably a bad idea. I can’t exactly help you if we get arrested or something, and I think we both know your mom will call the cops the minute she hears the engine of our bikes.” Toni sighs frustratedly on the other side of the phone. “I’ll need a different kind of backup for this. I’m going to talk to Josie and Veronica today, they should be able to help. We’ll have you back in no time, Bombshell, just hang in there okay?”

Cheryl tries to hold in her quiet cries. Toni’s voice hitched at the end of her sentence, a clear sign that the other girl was also getting emotional at the time of recording the message.

It’s overwhelming. The amount that Toni cared. All the trouble she went through. Cheryl would have assumed anyone else to give up after the first couple of hours of not getting ahold of her. But to hear that Toni couldn’t even sleep without knowing where she was, it’s shocking to Cheryl. How did she get so damn lucky?

“It’s me again. Is it stupid that I still think you might answer one of these calls? It probably is, but I don’t know, part of me is still hoping you’ll pick up and tell me everything’s okay and that I’ve been a nervous wreck for nothing.” Toni pauses after that, and it takes a few long seconds before she starts speaking again. “It’s been 24 hours. I think this is the first time we’ve gone a whole day without talking since the movies. I also think this is the first time I’ve ever…missed you. I mean, I’ve been freaking out since yesterday, but this is the first time that I actually really miss you. I like being around you, Cher. Just, come back to me already. I can’t stand this.”

Cheryl’s crying into one of her pillows, her mascara further staining the silk white pillowcase with each tear that falls. “I missed you too,” she whispers aloud to her empty bedroom, her voice raspy from how emotional she is.

When the next message starts, Toni sounds more worked up then the others, breathy and rushed, with anger lacing her every word.

“I’m going to kill your mom. I know she’s behind this! She’s so manipulative and cruel and ugh! How did you put up with that monster for 16 years? Josie, Veronica, and I just went to see her. Unfortunately, I have more questions than I did before, but at least now I know for sure that she did something to you. She hurt you, and once I get you back, I’ll make sure you never have to see that evil bitch again.” Toni’s anger starts to simmer, and then she turns a little softer, her words becoming quiet. “I…Josie’s out. Your mom, she…she showed her some drawing you made? I didn’t really know what it meant but Josie explained, and, well, I don’t blame her, really I don’t, but, it doesn’t change anything for me. I don’t want you to be scared that it does, because it doesn’t one bit. I still…you still mean so much to me. Veronica is still here too, and she’s going to help me figure this out. I’m going to save you, Cher.”

In the back of Cheryl’s mind, she always thought that Toni would eventually leave her, once she discovered one too many layers of how fucked up she was. It was one of her biggest fears when she started falling for Toni. She tried to tell herself that catching feelings for this girl was going to hurt her. That even if Toni liked her back, she wouldn’t once she learned all the horrible things she’s done. Because really, what kind of girl smiles when you tell her you burned your house down. Toni’s the only girl, Cheryl’s sure of it. Toni’s the only girl that would smile, and playfully retort “That’s badass, bombshell,” without missing a beat. Toni’s made for Cheryl, she has to be.

“Don’t be mad at me.” Are the first words that rush out of Toni’s voice when Cheryl starts the next message. She sounds so guilty and conflicted, and Cheryl’s demeanour softens, and she smiles sadly when she hears it. “Please please please don’t be mad. Your Nana called me, said something about you being with the sisters? She didn’t get anything else out after that, but it gave me some ideas. I had to tell Veronica about…us. Not that there is an us! I mean, unless you want there to be,” Toni awkwardly clears her throat. “This is so not the time to be talking about this, I know. I told Veronica about…you liking girls. And then well, we told Kevin too. I’m so sorry I betrayed your trust, Cher. I promise, I would have never done it if I thought there was another way to get you back. But you don’t have to worry, I already threatened both Kevin and Veronica that I’d cut their tongues out with my switchblade if they told anyone so, you’re good. I’ll totally understand if you hate me though. Just, let me get you back home safely, and then, you can yell at me all you want, deal?”

Cheryl let’s a watery chuckle escape her lips as the message ends. She can only imagine Kevin and Veronica’s frightened faces when Toni threatened them. She never thought she’d be so happy to have a gang member for a girlfriend. But perhaps it makes perfect sense. Cheryl’s always had a flare for the dramatics, and having a significant other so ready to engage in violent acts in order to defend her honour, is just the right amount of dramatic for her taste. Although, in this case it isn’t necessary. Cheryl doesn’t really mind that Toni told Veronica and Kevin about her sexuality. She trusts them, and the only person she was ever really hiding it from was her mother, anyway. Now that Penelope is out of the picture, Cheryl’s ready to start learning how to be proud of who she loves. Regardless of anyone’s judgment of her.

“Okay, I think we know where you are. Maybe. I don’t know. Kevin was able to help us get some information about the Sisters of Quiet Mercy, and it’s our best bet right now. On the one hand I hope you aren’t there, because, fuck Cher, if you’re there, going through…gay conversion therapy, god, I’m never going to forgive myself for letting that happen to you. But at the same time, if you are there, that means I can finally get you back, It means I finally know where you are, and I want that more than anything. We’re going later tonight, and I’ll burn that place down to the fucking ground if I have to. Anything to get you back. Anything.”

Cheryl doesn’t dwell too much on that message, she can’t take the way Toni sounds so close to the verge of tears. So close to the verge of completely breaking down. She knows it’s in the past, but even so, hearing the girl so hurt, makes her whole chest feel tight, and makes her heart pound painfully against her ribcage. She lifts one of her hands to furiously wipe the tears on her cheeks before quickly pressing on the next message.

“Hey, I don’t really have an update, I just… wanted to hear your voice.” Toni sniffles. “I’m going crazy waiting for the sun to set so we can finally go break you out. I know it’s smart to wait until it’s dark and all, but, if it were up to me, we would have went the second we got the lead…Hey, we should watch the sunset together some time. It’s really beautiful, and well, you deserve really beautiful things.”

They still haven’t done that yet. Watch the sunset together. Cheryl makes a mental note right then and there, to watch the sunset with Toni. It sounds peaceful and relaxing. She doesn’t want to see it for it’s beauty like Toni said though. She already has the other girl to look at for that.

With a shaky thumb, Cheryl presses down on the last message.

“Cheryl, this is like the tenth message i’ve left…wherever you are, I hope you’re hearing this. My voice telling you that I’m right there, I’m by your side. You’re not alone, Cheryl. Not ever again…I’m leaving now, to come get you, and I won’t let you go this time, I promise.”

Cheryl clicks off of her missed messages after that. Letting her phone fall on the bed beneath her, while she stares off into the distance of her bedroom with a heavy sigh.

She sits there, a million thoughts running through her brain but not a single one coherent enough to actually focus on. She doesn’t know what to think, or how to feel. All she knows, is she has the overpowering thought of Toni at the very forefront of her cluttered mind. Her heart is beating in the rhythm of the other girl’s name, and her shaky hands ache to thread her fingers through Toni’s.

Toni, Toni, Toni.

Cheryl moves to pick her phone up again, intending to dial the other girl’s number that she has memorized by heart, but before she can, she shakes her head and stuffs her phone into the pocket of her hoodie instead.

Toni’s voice isn’t enough, not this time.

She stands from the bed, grabs her car keys, and leaves Thistlehouse.

The drive is quiet. She has soft music playing lowly from her radio, but she isn’t really paying attention to the gentle melody flowing into the car. Her mind is much too distracted.

It’s only when she reaches Sunnyside Trailer Park, that she feels nervous. She didn’t exactly call ahead, she doesn’t know if Toni will want to see her right now. What if she’s overstepping?

She clutches the steering wheel tightly in her hands and closes her eyes, willing her insecurities away. That isn’t her voice in her head telling that Toni doesn’t want to see her, it’s her mother’s voice, and she’s tired of giving in to it.

Cheryl pulls her phone out and plays the most recent message one more time.

“…You’re not alone, Cheryl. Not ever again.”

She takes a deep breath. With those words acting as a shield of armour against her deepest, darkest fears and doubts, Cheryl steps out of her car.

She knocks on the door to Toni’s trailer. Her uncle was never home in the evenings, so she isn’t worried about the older man answering instead of her girlfriend. She didn’t know if Toni was home for sure though, and she anxiously scuffs her shoe over the welcome mat as she waits for the sound of any movement inside.

Thankfully, the sound of light footsteps reach Cheryl’s ears, and she breathes a quiet sigh of relief when they do.

“Cher?” Toni questions in concern as soon as she swings the door open. “What are you doing here?”

Cheryl doesn’t know what to say. She stares at her girlfriend’s worried face, all the words she wanted to get out disappearing as soon as she stares into those dark eyes that she’s grown to love so much.

“Baby?” Toni pries gently, tilting her head to the side.

Cheryl moves forward, capturing Toni’s lips in her own.

Her hands immediately tangle into stands of pink hair, and without more than a second passing, Toni’s hands are on her waist.

Although taken by surprise, Toni reciprocates the kiss without missing a beat. Kissing has become second nature to the two girls even in such a short amount of time. It just felt right. Their lips fit perfectly together, and even when it’s messy or awkward, it still feels like they’re kissing the girl they were always meant to kiss.

They break apart slightly to catch their breaths, they both still have their eyes closed, their lips just brushing against each other’s.

Cheryl is the one to pull away first, looking at her girlfriend with so much love and appreciation in her eyes.

“You’re not alone, Cheryl. Not ever again.”

“Do you wanna watch the sunset with me?” Cheryl blurts out, those being the only words she seems to be able to get past her lips.

Toni smiles fondly, and reaches out to hold the redhead’s hand. “Okay,” she agrees easily.

They end up driving to Sweetwater River. They’re silent the entire ride, choosing to wait until they reach their destination to start talking. It’s good though. They both take the opportunity to collect their thoughts, and they still hold hands over the console the whole time Cheryl’s driving. Having Toni finally touching her seems to have calmed some of Cheryl’s overwhelming anxiety. The other girl was the closest thing to a lifeline she’s ever had.

When they arrive, they exit the car, and decide to sit up on the hood, looking out over the water, where the sun has just started to make it’s descent, leaving the river basking in an orange glow.

“So,” Toni breaks the silence first, “I take it you listened to my messages.”

She looks almost, embarrassed. The prospect of that confuses Cheryl, those voice messages were the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for her.

“I did,” she nods, scooting closer to Toni.

The other girl wraps her arm around Cheryl’s shoulders without a second thought, pulling her into her side, and kissing the top of her head.

“You never told me you left me messages,” Cheryl says curiously.

Toni just shrugs. “After you lost your phone, I didn’t think you’d ever hear them, and I don’t know, I was kind of embarrassed to bring it up. How did you get them, anyway?”

“I got my new phone today,” Cheryl tells her, “Everything was restored, I guess the messages just transferred over.”

Toni nods.

“They were, really sweet,” Cheryl starts slowly. “I don’t think anyone’s ever said that kinda stuff to me before.” she pauses, and then, “Did you mean it?”

“Every word,” Toni answers honestly, “Every single word I said on those messages, I meant.”

Cheryl’s breath hitches at the sheer sincerity dripping from Toni’s voice, and before she has the chance to respond, Toni continues.

“Cher, losing you was pure torture. And it wasn’t much but, calling you, hearing your voice for even just a couple seconds, and then leaving those messages, it felt like I was really talking to you. It kept me sane, honestly.”

Cheryl moves her head back to look at the other girl, watching her closely, and seeing nothing but the truth in her face. She doesn’t understand it. Why did the most perfect girl on this whole planet, choose her? Toni could have anyone, and almost anyone would be more worthy of her unwavering love and support than Cheryl.

Toni grips Cheryl’s chin gently to meet her eyes. “Stop that,” she says.

“Stop what?” Cheryl shakily breathes.

“Whatever’s going on in that beautiful head of yours. Whatever lies it’s trying to tell you,” she kisses Cheryl’s forehead. “Stop listening to them.”

Cheryl moves to Toni’s lips and kisses her again. She wasn’t always the greatest with her words, but she knew how to show Toni how much those words meant to her, even if she didn’t know how to tell her.

When they pull back, Cheryl whispers, “Sometimes it’s hard to stop listening.”

“I know, baby,” Toni sadly smiles, pulling the girl back into her side again, allowing for Cheryl to rest her head on her girlfriend’s shoulder, and look out towards the stunning sunset ahead of them once again. “I’ll spend forever proving those voices wrong, if I have to.”

“Forevers a long time.”

“With you? Not long enough.”

They’re quiet then. Watching the sunset together in peace. Nothing around to distract them or interrupt them from what’s truly important. Which is just being here, in each other’s arms, where no one can hurt them. No sadistic nuns, masked serial killers, or rival gang leaders could touch them here.

This town seems to attract chaos with a magnetic pull, preying on it’s vulnerable small town values. It turns the best of them into monsters, and turns the monsters into sinners even worse than the devil himself. It’s astounding, really, that they’re all still there, that they all don’t just leave. They give into the storm of disarray as if it’s normal. As if men with black hoods and a thirst for blood is commonplace, and as if incredibly wealthy families tearing entire communities apart with nothing more than a checkbook and a strong mob mentality is standard protocol. Riverdale is the closest thing to hell that either of these girls has ever seen. And yet, sitting here, watching the sunset from a river that holds enough horror stories for an entire lifetime of terror, they know they’d never give it up. Because without this town, they wouldn’t have each other. The one beam of light through an avalanche of mayhem. They hate this town and what it’s done to them, but they wouldn’t trade it for the world.

[ladye11e]

Deception pt 29

The conflict between the Assassins and the Templars is getting out of hand. Lies, deceit and subterfuge, now you must pick a side...

Tagging @geekgoddess813 @sweet-flash @ermergerd517 @i-wontgivein @imakemyownblog 💕

If anyone else would like a tag, shoot me a dm 😁

Link to the full fic so far is Here.

Your eyes fluttered open and you wiped the sheen of sweat off your forehead with the back of your hand as you sat up steadily, taking several deep breaths to slow the pounding in your chest, as it was beating as if you had just run a marathon.

Glancing around as you tried to push the disturbing images of Achilles' face when he realised you were a traitor out of your mind, you only just noticed that you were alone in the bed. Shuffling out to peek through the curtains and seeing it was still dark outside, you grabbed the dressing gown off the back of the door and plodded out in search of Shay. You spotted him quickly with his back to you at the dining table; engrossed in typing something, so you leant over and kissed him on the cheek, before sitting on the edge of the table next to where he was working.

"There you are. Feeling better?"

"Mmm, much. What are you still doing up?!"

"Still? It's ten o'clock." He stated, weaving his arms around your waist and pulling you into his lap.

"Ten? Two whole hours sleep, great."

"No lass, ten on Monday. You've been passed out for over a day."

Your eyes widened as you grabbed his laptop and turned it to you, double checking what he had said as you had never slept for that long in your life. Looking around furiously when it finally sunk in, you went to jump up as your gaze finally landed on your bag, but Shays tightening grip around your middle prevented you from doing so. Cocking your head when he reached around his computer and fumbled about, you took your phone off him slowly when he handed it to you, extremely confused as to why a horde of assassins wasn't banging down the door right now.

"Guessing you're lookin' for this? Gist came over this morning and hacked into the chip, it's turned off now an ya don't need to put in that code. Should be glad I didn't throw it out the window, it's been going off non-stop."

Quickly unlocking it with your thumbprint, you dismissed the seven calls and flicked through the eighteen messages that were on there, grimacing when they were all from Jacob complaining about how Connor was being mean to him, making him exercise and eat green tree things with his dinner, and you needed to get him the hell out of there. You breathed a sigh of relief when you listened to the only voicemail you had, of Altäir sending a mass call to everyone saying that due to the circumstances everyone was allowed two days off to grieve and, were expected back in on Wednesday.

"Hmm, sorry about that. Most of it wasn't even important."

"I was only joking." He chuckled, pulling you down to kiss you gently. "Oh, I forgot to thank you yesterday, for gettin' the boss to give the room back. What did you do to get him to change his mind?"

Flicking through your phone one more time to use it as a distraction while you came up with a good excuse, you tossed it on the table and draped your arms over his shoulders, hoping you had come up with something believable, but would also give you a chance to pry slightly. You didn't want to lie, you even hated yourself for it, but it was better than the alternative.

"Nothing much, just made him realise he was being a complete idiot. Although..."

"Although..??"

Trailing off and furrowing your brow, you scratched your cheek as you contemplated how to word it, without dropping yourself into a spiralling fib.

"I don't know really. I've got the feeling he's hiding something, to use against me if I pissed him off again... I'm not sure though."

"He threatened you?!"

You winced when his arms tightened around you, gritting his teeth and tensing up as if he wanted to run over there and burn the whole building down to the ground.

"Calm down. Not as such, but he heavily suggested that there would be consequences if I made him look like a fool again?"

"I knew it..." He grumbled under his breath, shifting you slightly to the left on his lap so he could pull his computer back in front of him.

"Know what?!"

"Right, promise me you won't get mad."

You looked at him pointedly, as if to say 'well, duh' as he clicked on something several times, which brought up numerous schematics of Templar headquarters, and a particular one of which you slightly recognised as Haythams work office.

"You know what I mean. Remember that pin you wore for our first mission? Well, I had a gut feelin' that I wasn't the only one watching. Then he confirmed my suspicions when he asked me about that drawing you did, before I'd even mentioned it."

Rolling your tongue in your cheek as you could see where this was going, you zoned out; now thinking that more than just Haythams eyeballs would look good on a stick, snapping out of your revengeful plotting and sighing when you realised Shay was still talking.

"When I confronted him about it, he said that the feed went to his computer too so he could have a look for anything that could help us, but it was deleted. I'm sure he recorded it though, cos he keeps bringin' up little details that no one would have noticed unless they watched it more than once. I didn't know, I swear to ya."

"Son of a bitch... Details such as?"

The corner of your mouth curled up when he shuffled about and lowered his gaze to your lap, his cheeks taking on a pinkish hue when you booped his nose playfully, making you wonder why he kept getting flustered so quickly recently.

"Aww, you're cute when you're embarrassed. Okay, you don't have to say. But why didn't you tell me about it before now??"

"Cute?! Thanks, I think?" He mumbled, which made your eyes roll and a chuckle erupt. "Didn't say anything because I've got no proof. It's what I've been workin' on the past few days."

Now paying more attention to the screen when he pointed at it, you saw that it wasn't only the floorplans were there, but all of the internal ducting, emergency exits and lifts were highlighted too.

"If he has got anything, it'll be on his work computer, not his personal one upstairs because he was in the middle of that bloody merger thing when all that was happening, and he never left the place. You up for another bit of larceny together lass?"

You grinned wickedly and pulled him to you by the collar of his shirt, kissing him firmly before shuffling around on his knee, so your back was up against his chest.

"Stupid question... So, what's the plan?"

Spending all of the evening formulating a way in and out of Haythams office, you had finally come up with a strategy, and were now stood across the street from Templar headquarters at eight fifteen in the morning. Checking your reflection once more in your compact mirror, you were satisfied enough that even your own mother wouldn't be able to recognise you. You had reached out to one of your contacts Mary Read; who was an expert in disguises, and after being under her skilled hands for several hours, you were now adorning a full latex mask and a somewhat itchy wig, drastically changing your appearance. Knowing that she would have no idea who Shay was, you took him with you (even though he was rather surly about having to wear 'makeup') but as it had taken longer to get him done than yourself and had to leave to finalise a few details, you didn't have a clue what he looked like right now.

Fiddling with your choker that concealed a voice synthesiser as it felt like you were being strangled, you didn't notice that someone was stood behind you until you felt a hand cup your ass. Spinning around quickly and getting ready to punch whoever it was, you suddenly dropped your arm when you looked into the stranger's eyes, recognising them instantly.

"You're late." You scoffed, frowning at the higher pitched voice that came out of your mouth. "Blonde is definitely not your colour either."

Taking a step back to get a better look at Shay, your nose crinkled when you saw he was, well, boring. No distinguishing features at all. His scar had been concealed, and his hair was now sandy ash colour and swept to one side. Most would still find him attractive, but this didn't do anything for you in the slightest. But it wasn't like looks mattered at this moment in time, only that he couldn't be recognised, and Mary had done a fantastic job. On the upside, he was wearing a black suit and tie so that he could take the place of one of the security guards on the upper levels.

"I'll keep that in mind next time I go to the salon love." He joked. "Sorry about the time, Gist took a bit longer than he thought to get these Id's sorted. Here ya go."

Staring at the badge for a moment when he handed it to you, your eyes narrowed as you read the name on it three times, rolling all the despicable things you could do to Christopher when you saw him next around in your head.

"Kandi?! I sound like a freaking stripper! I'm gonna kill him..."

Clipping it to your blouse and slapping his arm when he burst out laughing, you stomped over the road when you saw that the staff were starting to arrive at work, stopping just outside while you waited for Shay to catch up; who was still sniggering at you.

"Oh shut up, Gus. Well, here we go."

Holding your breath as you swiped your card to get through the turnstiles and enter the building, you resisted the urge to smirk when you got through security without any problem and, headed over to the elevators. You were pushed to the back when nearly a dozen other people flooded in, giving you the perfect opportunity to look over the shoulder of the girl in front of you; whose place you would be taking, and sneak a peek at her mobile while she was texting. Taking a phone that Shay slyly handed to you and holding it down by your side, you clicked the screen when you saw that it had paired with her cell, allowing you to clone it.

Flicking through the contacts list quickly, you eventually came across the one you were looking for; stomach-churningly named 'xXhunnibunniXx', and sent a beautifully doctored picture of her kissing a man inside her car. Switching the phone off and slipping it into your bag, you only had to wait several seconds before hers started ringing, pursing your lips when as soon as she answered it, she started becoming hysterical.

"What?! What are you talking about?? I haven't cheated! Sweetie, please... Wait... Listen to me!"

You managed to keep a straight face as she banged on every button on the lift in trying to get out, barging through the doors and pretty much screaming down the phone when they finally opened. Sliding her work card that you had managed to snatch off of her bag into your pocket, all you had to do now, was wait until you got to the top floor.

By the thirty second, there was only four of you left in here, and you were becoming impatient at how long this was taking, huffing when the elevator stopped again at the next level. And as your luck would have it, just as the last two people got off the next person to get on was none other than Haytham, whose eyes immediately widened as he saw you, standing a little too close for comfort directly to your right. Crap crap crappity crap crap! You thought as he kept glancing at you out of the corner of his eye, and you could literally hear Shay gritting his teeth.

"Are you new? I do not believe we have met. Haytham Kenway."

Not daring to meet his eye just in case, you took his hand when he extended it, managing to muster up a small smile when he squeezed your fingers briefly.

"Kandi. I'm just here to help out, one of your assistants called in with a family emergency? So I've been told."

"I see. Well, I do hope you enjoy working for me. Perhaps we could see, more of each other? Over drinks shall we say?"

Your brow furrowed as you wondered what he was getting at when he leered at you, until you followed his gaze downwards and saw that one of your hold ups had slipped, so the lacy top was now just below the hem of your skirt.

"Oh! Silly me. These damned things just won't stay up! Honey, would you mind?"

Spinning around to face Shay, you hoisted your skirt up and propped your heel up on the waist-high rail next to him, grinning when he slowly ran his hands up your calf and thigh, sliding your stocking into its proper place.

"This is my husband, Gus. He's much better at taking them off of course, but that will have to wait until later. So I'll have to pass on your offer. Thank you anyway."

Shay could barely contain his smirk as you kissed him on the cheek and tugged your skirt back down, wiping your lipstick away with your thumb as Haytham gave him a somewhat surly, but polite nod. You bit back the urge to laugh as he couldn't get out of the elevator fast enough when it finally opened on the second to last floor, leaving you and Shay alone for a moment to sort yourselves out when the doors went to close again; pushing the stop button, so the lift didn't go anywhere.

"Well, that's was, interesting, what made ya say that? You probably shouldn't have done it though, that's not gonna make things any easier for us."

"I know, but I couldn't resist, it was just the first thing that popped in my head. Besides, since when do we ever get to do something as easy as this? Least we can be ourselves, apart from our faces. Suppose that was one way of testing the disguises." You giggled, handing back the phone out of your bag and, taking an earbud and a small, pencil-sized device off of him.

Quickly double checking that all remnants of your makeup were off his face, you exited the lift, Shay going to the right and taking his position at the security desk, with yourself going to left, joining the other two assistants outside Kenways office.

"Who are you?!" The redhead sat at the main desk several feet away from you asked rather abruptly without even looking up, her long nails that were clacking on her keyboard making you wince.

"Kandi. Last minute temp. Why are there three of us for one person?"

"Give it five minutes, and you'll know. You better be good." She huffed.

It didn't even take that long before Charles stomped out of Haythams office with a tower of files in his arms, splitting it in two and dumping a pile on yours, and the rest on the other smaller desk with an evil grin.

"You know the drill. Make sure the new one keeps up."

"Yes, Mr Lee." The redhead chanted miserably, not bothering to glance up from her computer.

Grabbing the topmost file and flipping it open, you groaned as you recognised its contents, which was page after page of minutes from meetings that all needed typing up, in Lee's almost illegible handwriting.

This was going to be a looooong day.

[spotifypremiumapks]

Who is Deja Hart? Wiki, Biography, Age, Cyrus Baxter's Girlfriend, Car Accident, Ebonie Baxter Confirms Death

Deja Hart Wiki - Deja Hart Biography

Deja Hart is the girlfriend of Cyrus Baxter, who was also known as Cyrus Russell, was part of the Baxter Boys family of social media Fame and tribute flow online after his mother, Ebonie Baxter, confirmed that her son had died in a car accident. Ebonie Baxter and her husband Byron Baxter are social media influencers. The family runs the Baxter Boys YouTube Channel, which has 122,000 subscribers. He has highlighted the plight of Cyrus's brother, Byron. She uses her full name, Ebonie Marie Baxter, on Facebook. According to online records, the family lives in Georgia. Hi, I'm Byron Baxter and I'm 5 years old with a rare bone disease called Osteogenesis Imperfecta. I've had over 100 fractures and that doesn't stop me from smiling! Blake is my much bigger little brother! Thank you for subscribing to our channel! "That page says. Cyrus Baxter was the eldest of Ebonie's children. The family's Instagram page he has 1.2 million followers. According to Fox8Byron's story was highlighted by celebrities like Cardi B. Be aware that some of Ebonie's videos may be annoying for some. An official told him in a video that his son is believed to have killed himself while driving at high speed, causing a car accident. He talks openly about suicide and shares his pain in a very vivid way on the family's social media accounts. If you or a loved one needs help, feel free to call the National Suicide Prevention Line at 800-273-8255. Help is always available at that number.

Ebonie Baxter confirmed on Facebook that Cyrus has died in videos and live posts

Confirmation of Cyrus Baxter's death came on Facebook from his mother, who published a series of posts about it. The family's Instagram page has also posted tributes to Cyrus. On September 11, 2021, Ebonie Baxter wrote on facebook, My son is gone ... I am awake thinking about his last moments. It hurts so much ... So to see this fake Gofundme when my son's ending is already paid for ~ I'm picking up his ashes in the morning, how dare people? ... God please help me get through this ... My son, why did you do it? Let me? What could I have done? I want to hear your voice son like I did every day ... I just want to wake up from this nightmare ... My son is dead💔 I don't blame you God, I know you loved him more than me, I know you have him now but I'm broken ... I stay to explain to my children that the Big Brother they love is no longer here ... They keep asking about him .. MY SON WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME ??? Cyrus!!!!!!! Wake me up!!!!! On September 9, he wrote a heartbreaking post on Facebook: Mental illness is real ... as a mother of a young adult I constantly worry about it can be so overwhelming. Whenever a breakdown occurs, I wait by the phone praying for an answer the next morning. By checking my phone to see if my messages have been "read" that way, I can confirm that he is alive. As a parent, you try to do everything you can to change the perception of your reality. You ask him to come, you ask him to come have lunch with you, hell, I pay my son a daily bonus of $ 10 just to take his medication every day…. As a mom you do what you can .. This morning is one of those days…. I'm checking my phone to see if it 'read' my messages, that lets me know that it has survived another night ... People may ask 'why don't you go home?' I've done it numerous times, multiple times over a month ... and it's always that 'one time' if I'm exhausted and decide to stay home, what if it's overwhelming. Legally there is no help…. They will hold it for 72 hours and let it out to restart the cycle ... I feel powerless. I don't want to lose my son. But my son doesn't want to do it all ... I wish there was something I could make it work! But in the meantime, all I can do is wait and look at my phone to see if it wakes up and "reads" my messages ... That lets me know that at least she survived another night ... However, then came the tragic news. She told people that "my son crashed his car and went out the window." In a live broadcast, she said she went to his house to see where he was, but he wasn't there. He said that Cyrus had threatened to commit suicide. “I just prayed for him. I didn't know where to run to him, ”she said in a video. "I've been calling him all night and all morning." In that video, she was heading to the police station to look for him. That was on September 9. The video continues to show her requesting notification of her son's death by officials. Then that notification came. Cyrus was dead. “Allow me to express my condolences to you. At this point, it appears that he attempted suicide in the accident. I was driving fast ... and ended up in some trees, ”an official told Ebonie Baxter in the live video.

Ebonie wrote: 'All I ever wanted was for him to smile'

Ebonie expressed her pain and anger on Facebook. She wrote, I went to the funeral home to make arrangements for My Sonshine ... For 20 years I was the best mother I could be to him ... I fought all of his battles and I didn't care either! Many will say that I was not strict, I let it run on me and I did it because the only thing I ever wanted was for him to smile. He wanted her to know how much she loved him. Yesterday he took his own life ... he crashed his car into the trees while talking on the phone with a woman ... he told her that he told his mother to find his body and then go find him ... I'm devastated. As I make my way to this funeral home to sign the paperwork to see her body, I pray that GOD keeps me. I don't think I prayed enough ... did I give enough, did I stalk him enough to spend more time with me? For more than 20 years it was him and I…. Now he's with GOD and I'm here to pick up the broken pieces ... I'm fucking mad. I'm hurt! How the hell do I keep up after this? Where is this strength that I am supposed to have? I want a drink, I want to fight, I want to take his place ... My son of a bitch is DEAD💔💔💔 She has shared many other live Facebook videos about the situation. Ebonie Baxter has posted many other long Lives on Facebook about her son. You can find them here. Read Also: Who was Brian Sweeney? Wiki, BIography, Age, 911 Passenger Left Haunting Voicemail to Wife Read the full article

[mrswhozeewhatsis]

I Need More Part 2

A/N: It’s finally here! The second part to I Need More that everyone wanted! It got pretty long without smut, so no smut. Hope it lives up to the hype! Special thanks to @manawhaat and @littlegreenplasticsoldier for their always fabulous beta services. I wish I had time to let them look over this one more time.

Summary: Reader runs away for a while, then has to face her fears.

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Warning: ANGST.

Word count: 4652 (Over twice as long as the first part, which just goes to prove that fixing shit is harder than screwing it up in the first place!)

For the fourth night in a row, you sat on the beach with a bottle in your hand and watched the sun set. It had taken you a couple of days to get here, but you were about as far away from Lebanon, Kansas as you could get and still be in the continental US. Maybe Maine would be further than Washington, but you’d turned left out of the motel parking lot, not right, so Washington is where you ended up. The weather had turned the day before, and it was chillier tonight, with a light misty rain making you feel even colder. The storm front was almost past, though, which was how you got to see the sun fall from behind the clouds before it sank into the ocean.

Six days. Six days since you’d given in to Dean Winchester’s charms and then woken up alone. Six days since you’d turned off the GPS and sound on your phone so no one could track you and you wouldn’t have to listen to the beeps and trills when they called or messaged. Five days since you’d considered turning it off completely, but knew that would send a message all its own and just prompt whoever was calling to really look for you. Four days since you’d found the rundown motel a block from the beach and plunked down enough cash to quiet the manager about the credit card that didn’t match the name you gave him. Three days since you’d slept for twelve hours, only to wake up from a dream that Dean was knocking on your door. Three days since you told housekeeping to fuck off and not knock on your door again. The days since then had settled into a nice routine: Wake up, shower, get dressed, try to eat, buy a newspaper you wouldn’t really read (unless you counted Marmaduke and Garfield), buy booze, try to eat some more, then settle on the beach to watch the sun go down and drink the bottle dry.

The mist and the chilly breeze had you shivering tonight, though, and no matter how beautiful it made the sunset, you were in an even worse mood than previous nights. By the time the stars were out, even though the rain had stopped, you were so cold your teeth were clacking together. Sounds from a bonfire down the beach floated through the air and you glimpsed happy people dancing to music and laughing at stories. The laughter was just as annoying as the chattering of your teeth, so you gave up your new nightly ritual of watching the waves in the moonlight and walked back to your motel.

Once you were warm and dry, you sat down on the bed and stared at the TV. It didn’t work, so all you saw was your reflection on the screen, which soon irritated you further.

How did you let this happen to you? How did you give Dean Winchester so much power that he could bring you this low? What happened to the independent, badass woman who took no shit from anyone and protected herself from everything? You weren’t the type to ignore calls and texts and wallow! You faced shit head on and fucking dealt with it!

Quickly very angry, you got up with the intention of just doing something. The room going for a spin reminded you that you weren’t really in any shape for that, at that moment. When the room eventually settled into a gentle rocking, you made yourself a cup of coffee with the ancient one-cup coffeemaker the motel provided. The first sip made you grimace. Shit, the coffee must have been as old as the décor. You drank it, anyway, suddenly needing to be sober and in control again. You’d moped enough. Time to wake up, get up, and deal with shit.

After the last drop was down the hatch, you turned to your phone, taking a deep breath to fortify yourself. You turned on the screen and faced your messages.

32 messages and 11 voicemails.

“First message dated six days ago, 4:54PM: ‘Hey, it’s Sam. Dean said you had a hunt and had to go. Sorry I didn’t get to say goodbye. Call if you need backup, okay?’

“Second message dated four days ago, 10:28AM: ‘Hey, it’s Sam again. I’ve been sending texts but not getting an answer so figured I’d call. Did something happen during this last hunt? Dean’s acting off and you’re not answering. Call me, okay?’

“Third message dated four days ago, 3:18PM: ‘Hey kiddo, it’s Jody. Sam’s worried so he called me. Let me know you’re still breathin’, okay?’

“Fourth message dated two days ago, 11:47PM: ‘Y/N, it’s Sam again. Please call me back. Whatever happened, we’ll find a way to fix it. Please.’

“Fifth message dated yesterday, 9:24AM: ‘It’s Sam. Dean told me what happened and Garth told me there’s no hunt. I don’t know what to say. Please, just call me so we can talk. Or, if you don’t want to talk, just text me to let me know you’re okay and not dead in a ditch somewhere. I think we can fix this, but only if you talk to us.’

“Sixth message dated yesterday, 9:25AM: ‘Hey Y/N, it’s Garth. I just got a call from Sam looking for you and now I’m worried. Call me when you get this, okay?”

“Seventh message dated today, 9:05AM: ‘Y/N, it’s Jody. Sam called again and now I’m worried. You have twenty-four hours to call me, no texting, I need to hear your voice, or I’m putting a BOLO out on you. We just need to know some monster hasn’t gotten you.’”

The rest of the voicemails were hang-ups from either Sam or Jody, and the text messages were all similar to the voicemails. You looked over the messages, seeing all their worry spelled out right in front of you, and felt like a first-class heel. You sent off a quick text to Jody to tell her you were okay, and two minutes later your phone rang. It took five minutes of convincing her you weren’t being held captive or somehow under duress, but she finally believed that you were okay. She offered to listen if you needed to talk, but you weren’t quite ready for that, yet. You promised to call when you were ready, which was the only way she’d let you off the phone.

The call ended and you stared at the screen. Jody would tell Sam you were fine, you didn’t need to tell him yourself. At least, that was the lie you wanted to believe so you wouldn’t have to make the call. While you were working up the nerve to text Sam, your phone rang, and it was him.

“Hey, Sam,” you murmured, nerves taking over your voice.

“Oh, thank God, Y/N, I’m so glad to hear your voice!” Sam pulled the phone away from his ear and yelled in the background. “Dean! She answered!”

Heavy footfalls echoed in the background. “She’s okay?” you heard Dean ask, slightly breathless from his run.

Sam pulled the phone back to his mouth. “You’re safe, right? Jody said you’re okay, and it’s not like Poughkeepsie or that job we had in that one funky town, right?”

You almost smiled. “I’m safe, Sam. No one’s got me prisoner or anything. Just needed a few days of quiet time, that’s all.”

Sam shifted the phone again. “She’s safe, Dean. Hunt’s done, monster’s dead, just bruises.”

“Good,” Dean replied in the background. “Then I’m going to bed. Good night.”

Sam tossed a response away from the phone and then waited a moment before returning to your conversation. “I didn’t tell Dean that there wasn’t a hunt because I figured you had a reason for telling him that. So, now that he’s gone, tell me. Why did you lie to Dean and run away?”

Tears stung your eyes. “Because I was an idiot, Sam, and I let happen the one thing I always swore I would never let happen. I slept with Dean and woke up exactly like I thought I would: alone. I couldn’t let him see how much he hurt me, Sam, because it’s not his fault. I knew what I was getting into. I knew what would happen.” You wiped wetness from your cheek. “Do you know the old fable about the frog and the scorpion?”

“I think so,” Sam replied.

“The frog takes the scorpion across the river, but the scorpion stings the frog, anyway, because that’s just what scorpions do. I slept with Dean knowing he’d leave because that’s just what Dean does, and I can’t blame him any more than you can blame the scorpion. I’m the stupid frog, Sam. I should have known better.”

The line was quiet while you sniffled and Sam sighed.

“Are you sure he left that morning?” he asked. “Like really left, and not just went to run an errand?”

Your surprise at Sam’s question made you shift on the bed. “What do you mean, am I sure? I woke up and he was gone! Bags were gone, no note, no nothing! He left, Sam!”

“Okay, but then why did he go back?”

Your world screamed to a stop like a record player after someone pulled the plug. “What?”

“You said he left, but you obviously saw him long enough to lie to him about Garth sending you on a hunt. That means he came back, right?”

Words stuck in your throat while your brain stuttered. “Wha-… but… I mean… what?”

“I don’t think he left you like you think he did. I mean, that morning, he came to the hospital to check on me and brought me my duffel bag so I had clean clothes and my shaving kit and everything. He came into my room in a great mood with a smile on his face but all he’d tell me was he had a really good night. The doctors wanted to do some follow-up tests before they released me, so he said he’d be back later. When he came back, he was pissed off about something, but wouldn’t tell me what. I had to endure Metallica at top volume the entire drive back to the bunker.” Sam paused, and you could almost hear his bitch face. “So, I think that means he didn’t leave you like you think he did.”

There was obviously still some alcohol in your system because it took forever for your brain to catch up with what Sam was saying.

“But… he didn’t leave a note! All the bags were gone!”

“Maybe he thought he’d be back before you woke up?”

Stunned silence. What if you were wrong? What if he had come back for you? There were so many possibilities.

“I have to go, Sam. I need to think about this. Even if he came back for me, that’s no guarantee he wanted me as anything more than a fuck buddy, and I can’t do that. I care about him too much for that, Sam.”

“Okay. I understand. Just think about it. And you can always call me to talk, day or night, you know that.”

“Thanks, Sam,” you muttered before hanging up the phone and dropping it onto the comforter in front of you.

No sooner had you flopped back onto the pillows than your phone was chirping with a text message. You picked it back up with a groan, then held it in front of your face while your head was halfway buried in the pillow.

Garth: Why aren’t you responding? Why is your GPS turned off?? If I don’t hear from you in the next 12 hours, you’ll have me and every hunter I know coming for you! Ya idjit!

A smile danced on your lips for the first time in days. Garth was always good to you, keeping tabs on you in case you ran into trouble and helping you to find cases when you couldn’t find your own. You’d even spent some time with his pack and helped him clear out an invading pack that didn’t agree with Garth’s no-kill policy. Garth was a good friend and didn’t deserve you shutting him out.

You: I’m sorry. Just needed a break for a few days without people bugging me. I’m fine. If you’ve got a case for me, let me know.

***

Two days later, you were in the tiny town of Torrey, Utah, looking into the grisly deaths of some tourists who’d been camping in the nearby national park. Several campers had gone missing in recent months, but this was the first set of bodies discovered. The locals thought it was an animal attack, with whatever animal preferring to chow down on organ meat since several organs were missing from each body, but you’d noticed clean cuts beneath the claw marks. You suspected something was using claws to cover up the actual kill method but hadn’t figured out more than that based on just one trip to the morgue. Whatever it was, it was throwing clues pointing to all kinds of different monsters, possibly to throw you off. You needed to interview families and witnesses, not to mention heading into the park yourself, but it was getting late, so you headed to the deli/bakery that was attached to your motel. After a good sandwich and a piece of pie that just made you nostalgic, you decided to call it a night and sack out in your room.

You were doing your third verse of the hokey pokey with your room key card, mumbling about how it would probably be faster to just pick the damn lock, or shoot it out even, when you heard his voice behind you.

“Hey, Y/N.” Dean’s voice was barely loud enough for you to hear him over the crickets chirping, but you still caught the tremor in it.

You froze for a second, a quiet gasp filling your lungs. It was just enough time for the stupid door lock to finally register that the key card was valid and then lock again before you could turn the handle. Without thinking, you growled at the door, giving it a pound with your fist. Although vandalizing property was a tempting option at that moment, you decided to deal with Dean, instead. A deep sigh settled your twisting stomach as you turned around to see Dean standing a few feet away, looking as attractive as ever even in the unforgiving fluorescent porch light.

His shoulders were up, his head was down, and his hands were shoved so deeply into his pockets you were amazed his fists hadn’t burst through them. He wasn’t exactly looking at you so much as glancing around the dark parking lot with his head ducked and occasionally letting his eyes pass over your general direction. Seeing him look so… nervous… just took away any wind you might have had in your sails. You’d now had two days to think about what Sam had said, as well as what you had said to Dean before you’d left, and you felt about two inches tall. You suddenly wished you had pockets you could shove your hands into, as well.

“Hey Dean,” you tried to say, but it came out more like a nervous mumble than a friendly welcome. You cleared your throat and tried the whole talking thing again. “I am so--”

“Sam told me--” Dean started at the same time that you did.

You both stopped and gave each other nervous smiles, heads still ducking, weight shifting back and forth from one foot to the other. From the outside, it probably looked like some kind of intricate dance for introverted nerds.

You waved at the door. “If I can ever get this stupid thing to work, do you want to come in and talk?”

Dean’s face lit up, sending a warm feeling to calm the butterflies in your gut. He had an almost cocky gleam in his eye, even though his smile was still wavering a bit. “Yeah. I’d like that,” he said, his voice stronger now that his shoulders had dropped a couple inches.

The key card worked this time, first try, and you both entered the tiny room. You were only halfway in the door when you saw a body sitting on your bed that definitely wasn’t there when you’d left. A quick shove from behind sent you tumbling onto the bed yourself. As you struggled to catch yourself, the lights came on in the room and you recognized the person bound and gagged next to you.

“Dean???”

Shit. Shapeshifter.

The Dean on the bed managed a muffled groan, his eyes wide with alarm and darting frantically between you and the Dean that was locking the door. You rolled off the bed, landing with your feet solidly on the ground, ready to fight off whatever would come at you. A quick feel around the back of your waistband confirmed that whatever had shoved you into the room had also grabbed your gun, leaving you with only your assorted knives in all of their hiding places.

There wasn’t time to get at any of them, however, before Not-Dean was coming at you, gun emptied and tossed aside, fists flying. You fought hard, but the shifter was bigger and stronger than you, and he’d gotten a download of information from Dean on all of your weaknesses. Soon, you were overpowered, head fuzzy from too many blows, and on your knees, the shifter holding you by your hair while you tried to make the room come back into focus. Dean was furious, eyes fierce and face red, the cords in his neck standing out as he pulled on the ropes that tied his wrists to the rusty iron bedposts behind him.

That’s when the monster decided to monologue.

“You know, I came here just to find a Wendigo and see if a story an old shaman told my grandmother was true. So, I did your job for you, trapped a Wendigo, and had myself some Wendigo heart stew for lunch. And you know what? The old shaman was right! Mix the right hoodoo with the right organs from the right monster, and you can get all kinds of neat results!”

The room stopped spinning despite the shifter’s hold on your hair, and you carefully worked one arm behind you to reach for the silver knife in your boot. The trick would be to hide your intentions by continuing to look like you were ready to pass out. While you kept your hand out of his sight, you rolled your eyes at the shifter and scoffed with a pained wince.

“Really? You ate a Wendigo? Isn’t that a little ironic?”

The shifter yanked on your hair, making you wonder how expensive wigs were these days, and suddenly Not-Dean was growling in your face, making you grimace at his stench. “Ironic or not, it definitely gave me an upgrade.” He wiggled the fingers of his free hand in your face, and you watched as the nails grew into the sharp claws of a Wendigo.

Shoving down your panic at this new development, you tried to keep him talking until you could free your knife, still pretending you were too weak to move.

“So, the campers in the park… they were what, dessert?”

The shifter laughed as he tugged hard on your hair yet again and turned away from you to judge Dean’s reactions. The way he was standing gave you all the space you needed to grab your knife without him seeing. “Just a test run of my new powers. Oh, they didn’t even know what hit ‘em!” He kept on laughing like he’d told the funniest joke at the party while you continued inching your fingers into your boot. “You know, I just came here on a whim, and now I’ve got these amazing new abilities AND I have Dean Winchester and his little girlfriend in my pantry! I’m fucking awesome!”

He leaned down to get in your face again, giving you a blast of necrotic halitosis that made you want to bring up your dinner and momentarily stopped your hand. “Do you know, he was so nervous about coming here to talk to you? He was afraid you’d be mad at him for tracking you down, almost stalking you, or that you’d still be mad for the way he left you the last time, no matter what Sam told him.” The face in front of you was so smug you wanted to rip it off, even if it was Dean’s. “He was so surprised when you—well, it was me because I was waiting here for you while you enjoyed your dinner, but you know what I mean—when you overpowered him and tied him up, he didn’t even fight! He didn’t want to hurt you, bless his little stupid heart! He thought you were possessed! Tried to exorcise me!”

The knife was in your hand, now, and you were looking for your chance. While the shifter laughed about Dean trying to exorcise him, you reached behind him and slashed at the back of both of his ankles. With both of his Achilles tendons cut and burning from the silver, he crashed to the floor screaming in agony. In his pain and surprise, the hand holding onto your hair tugged you down with him, but once he hit the floor, he let go. You rolled away from him, preparing yourself for another attack, but he was too busy writhing and wailing.

Seeing your chance, you pounced on the shifter, plunging the silver knife into his heart. He almost looked surprised, but then his face relaxed and his final breath left his body.

It took you a minute or two of sitting and staring at the body before you were convinced it was dead. Muffled noises from the bed eventually brought you out of your exhausted stupor and you got up to take care of Dean. You pulled your knife from the body, wiping it off on its shirt, then stumbled around the bed to cut Dean’s ropes. While he freed himself, you collapsed onto the mattress.

Dean was leaning over you, checking out your injuries, holding his warm hands to your face and neck while he looked you over. “Damn, Princess, you had me worried there for a minute.”

You met his gaze and tried not to melt under the affection you saw in his eyes. Everything you’d wanted to say to him for the past couple of days bubbled up and started spilling out of your mouth. “I’m so sorry about what I said before I left. I didn’t mean it, any of it. I was scared and hurt and just wanted to run away.”

Dean’s hands slid around behind your shoulders and he pulled you to his chest where he held you close. The beating of Dean’s heart was comforting against your ear. You couldn’t imagine a better place in the entire world than in Dean’s arms and that thought almost kept you from hearing his words. “Sam told me you never saw my note, so I get it. There’s nothing to apologize for.”

“You left a note?”

“Yeah. I did.” Dean’s heartbeat picked up. “Left it in the bathroom so the fan wouldn’t blow it away. Told you I was checking on Sam and getting breakfast and I’d be back soon.”

With a groan, you turned your face into his chest, wanting to hide there forever. “I never went into the bathroom. That’s why I never saw it. I’m so sorry, Dean!”

Dean pulled you away from his chest, cupping your face in his hands so you couldn’t avoid his eyes. “It’s okay. We’re past it, now. We can forget about it and start over, right?”

The fear flashed in his eyes so quickly you would have missed it if you’d blinked; he was just as scared of this as you were. You nodded, enjoying watching the tension bleed out of him as his mouth turned up into a wide grin. He then smashed that grin into yours, both of you trying to kiss and smile at the same time.

When you finally came up for air, the stiffness and aches in your body reminded you of the dead shifter on your floor.

“I think we need to burn this body to be safe, since he’s part Wendigo, now. And then we should get the hell outta Dodge before the maid sees this mess.”

Dean agreed, and the two of you cleaned up the room, wrapping the body in wrinkled motel sheets and stuffing it in the trunk of the Impala. You hung up the Do Not Disturb sign and the two of you headed out to burn and bury the evidence.

When the flames were burning high in the hole Dean had dug, you sat on the cooler a few feet away, watching Dean stare into the fire. He seemed lost in his thoughts and you wondered what he was thinking about. Filling in the hole didn’t involve much joking or conversation, and the drive back to the motel was quiet as the first faint light of dawn appeared over the horizon. In fact, Dean didn’t speak again until all your things were packed away and you were shutting the motel room door behind you.

“Hey, Y/N?” Dean said, his voice catching on your name while he shuffled his feet in the gravel next to the Impala.

“Yeah, Dean?” You walked over to your car and tossed your bag into the back seat before turning back to look at Dean.

“I know Sam’s always bugged you about moving into the bunker, and you’ve always said it wasn’t your style.”

The morning air was so quiet and still, you thought the pounding of your heart might echo between the buildings and accidentally wake the neighbors. “Yeah?”

Dean shuffled a bit more, running a hand through his hair and down over his face, his other hand shoved into his pocket. “Well, now that we, you know….”

As nervous as you were, wondering what Dean was going to say, you had to stifle a giggle at Dean being obviously even more anxious.

“Yeah, Dean?” you prodded quietly, moving closer to him so you could touch his arm.

“Well, I was wondering if you’d reconsider moving into the bunker. I’d really like to have you around as more than just a part-time friend.” He finally looked up at you and saw the smile on your face. Your smile made him brave, and he stepped into your space, lightly running a hand up and down your arm while he looked into your eyes. “In fact, I was wondering if you’d be willing to consider joining us full-time.” He cleared his throat. “I mean, not just hunting, but, you know, being with me.”

Considering the beating your face had taken, you were surprised you could smile as widely as you did.

“You want to try being with me? Just me? No flings, just the two of us?”

Dean’s face flushed and it was the cutest thing you’d ever seen. The pink in his freckled cheeks really set off the green in his eyes. “Yeah, Y/N. Just you and me. I know I’m no prize, and I can’t say I’ve ever done something like this before, but I’d like to give it a shot if you would. I’d like to try being, you know, more.”

Pushing yourself into his arms, your mouths were close enough to kiss. Dean debated it for a second before tightening his arms around you and keeping you close, your face nuzzling into his chest, right where his heart was. It was the warmest, safest embrace you’d ever known.

“Yeah, Dean. I’d like more, too… very much.”

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[iamn0tdansmith]

“Meet me here tomorrow?”

 Dan tried to hide the desperation in his voice. He didn’t want her to leave. It was already so late at night, he wished they could just curl up in bed together and laze around all day. Unfortunately, they had lives and responsibilities and they both had other people they needed to deal with, somehow. He hadn’t heard much of her phone conversation with Alex. If she had shut herself away in the bathroom, it was probably for a reason, and after all the shit they’ve been through, he wanted to respect her privacy.

           They kissed again, and he offered her a ride back to her hotel. It wasn’t too far from his own, but there was no way he’d let her walk back at half past two in the morning. The five-minute lift became a half-hour long, as they couldn’t stop kissing each other in the car. It was sweet; every time Rinan was ready to get out of the car, she’d turn back and kiss him one more time, which turned into heated make-outs. He missed her as soon as she shut the car door.

 --------

           Alex Turner sat at the table in his hotel room, in the room he was meant to be sharing with Rinan, absentmindedly spinning and empty glass. There was whisky in the glass, before he had drank it all, and now he was out. He thought about going out for a smoke, but he only had one cigarette left. His cell phone was the only other item on the table. He stared at it, waiting for any sign of life. He had already blown Rinan’s phone enough that night, and he hated how clingy it made him seem, but he was worried sick. After the awards show, she had just disappeared. Even the journalists hadn’t seen her. No one knew where she had gone, and it worried him.

           The two of them were close. Close enough for Alex to know many of her dark secrets, and close enough for him to be rightfully worried, given those secrets. He decided to give her a call again, just one more call. He put it on speaker and let it ring, waiting to hear the voicemail message he had heard over a dozen times that night. But then he heard her voice, Rinan’s real voice, not the poor-quality recording of her voicemail.

           “What happened? I’ve been trying to reach you, love; where’d you make off to?” He tried to hide the relief in his voice, not wanting her to feel bad for worrying him. He was just glad she was okay.

“I met up with Dan. And we just cut out early. I’m sorry if I worried you.”

Alex sat back in his chair. This whole time, she was with another guy? Really, he knew he couldn’t be upset or jealous because it’s not like they were an exclusive couple. He just thought they had enough of a commitment to each other that she’d at least take the time to let him know she was alright. That’s what annoyed him the most; the fact that she couldn’t take three seconds before or after getting screwed by Dan Smith to just tell him she wasn’t dead in a ditch somewhere. He didn’t say any of that, though. “I’ll see you in a bit, then.”

He waited for her to reply before he hung up the phone. Alex wasn’t sure what he meant by ‘in a bit’. He still didn’t know if she’d be staying at Dan’s or coming back to their hotel room. He just knew he couldn’t stay here, not at the moment. He wrote her a note, just in case she came back while he was out. He didn’t want to worry her. He left the hotel not knowing where he was going, he just needed some air.

First stop was to get more cigarettes, as he had lit up his last one as soon as he stepped outside. Next stop was a bar that was surprisingly still open. Alex sat on a stool, a few seats down from a man passed out on the bar top.

“Is it too late for a whisky rocks?” Alex asked the bartender.

“You’re just in time for last call, mate. Here you go.”

Alex nursed it slowly, enjoying the burn. There was a couple making out in the back. In fact, he wasn’t quite sure they weren’t doing more than that. Whatever they were doing, he pretended he didn’t see any of it. Alex stayed in the bar until it closed up, then continued to wander around the city. He had circled his way back toward the hotel and decided to stroll through the park nearby.

Rinan was on one of the benches, and Alex noticed her from afar. He would have recognized her anywhere, but it still surprised him to see her there. He strode over, having calmed down from their previous phone conversation. “Ah, fancy seeing you here.” He said, a smile on his lips. Seeing her confused expression, he explained himself, joking with her.

“I’m sorry about earlier. I’m just feeling a lot of things that I really can’t seem to figure out.”

Alex sat next to her, nodding. He understood all too well. “I can’t say that it’s alright, because it’s not. But I will tell you I’m not giving up on this. I know we don’t really behave like a normal couple, but I’m okay with that. I’ll let you explore whatever you want with whoever you want. I’ll still be here. You’ve got me, Rin.”

He pulled her close to him, wanting her to feel the truth in his words. He meant every one of them, because he knew no matter what happened, no matter who Rinan chose, she would always have her. They were far too close to ever leave each other.

Eventually they went back to the hotel room, and the two of them slept for a really long while, entangled in the bedsheets and each other.

  --------

Meanwhile, Dan had barely slept. He couldn’t stop thinking of Rinan, and by the time he had actually fallen asleep, his phone woke him up. It was Christina calling, again. He groaned and picked it up.

She spoke before he could. “I’m outside your hotel room!” Her all-too-enthusiastic voice said over the phone.

“What? Chris, I told you I’d come see you later. Why are you here?” He grumbled, shuffling out of bed. It was rare for him to be so snappy with someone, but after being bombarded with calls and texts from her all night, he was running low on patience.

“I just missed you, silly, and you told me we’d see each other in the morning.” She was so matter-of-fact, so oblivious.

Daniel let her in, and she immediately wrapped her arms around his chest in a hug. He didn’t push her away, but he didn’t hug her back either. “Chris, listen, I’m actually glad you’re here because we need to talk.”

She pulled away and looked up at him, her bangs falling into her eyes. “What is it? You’re not breaking up with me, are you? On our almost-two-month-iversary?” Her lip started quivering like a child.

“I’m sorry, I really liked you, and you’re a sweet girl but I don’t see this working in the long run, hun.” Dan had left out all the parts about how he was in love with another woman, but what he said wasn’t wrong.

The redhead burst into tears sinking down on the edge of the bed, and Dan rubbed her lightly on the shoulder. He didn���t want to give her any wrong ideas, but he also couldn’t just watch a girl cry and not try to console them. Break-ups sucked, especially when you’re being dumped. Just then, the crying stopped. Christina pointed at a small black rectangle on the floor.

“What is that?” She asked accusingly.

Dan shrugged. “I don’t know,” he replied in all honesty. He had no idea what that was.

Christina stood from her seat on the bed and walked over to the item, picking it up in her hand. She took the lid off of the rectangle and showed it to him. “This is lipstick, Dan. And I doubt it’s yours.” She glanced around the room, only just noticing that Kyle wasn’t in it. “Wait, you lied to me yesterday? And you were with some whore!” She shouted at him.

“Whoa, wait. Chris, that’s not—” He was at a loss for words, and even if he did know what to tell her, she wouldn’t give him the chance.

“Who is she, Dan? Huh? Tell me!” Christina threw the lipstick at him and it bounced off his chest. Whatever sadness she felt a few moments earlier had turned to rage.

“Ow, what the hell?” He rubbed the spot where the tiny metal box hit him. Now he was a bit peeved. “Christina, just go, alright? I already told you we’re done.”

“I’m going to find out who she is, Dan. Don’t you worry! And when I know, I’m going to ruin both your lives.” Her pretty brown eyes narrowed at him, but he just took what she said as empty threats. How would she ever find out? And how could she possibly ruin their lives when she won’t be in them?

Daniel led her to the door and shut it behind her, glad to be rid of her. Crazy bitch… he thought. But he had other things to think about, now. He needed to get ready to see Rin.

 --------

Alex watched Rinan get ready in their hotel room the next morning. They had chatted over breakfast together like nothing had changed, like she wasn’t about to go meet with another guy. He had to continuously remind himself that A.) he and Rin were not exclusive. B.) because of that, he had no right to have an opinion on what she did or who she saw. And C.) he had stupidly gone and told her that he was okay with her ‘exploring herself.’ Whatever that meant. He wanted her to be happy, he truly did, but he wanted her to be happy with him. There was no taking back what he said now, and he still meant it for the most part. It was just going to be really hard on him to watch the woman he loves so much be with someone else.

What reassured him, though, was knowing they’d be on tour together soon, which meant lots of time together. Alex might just be able to remind her all the reasons why the two of them work so well together, in more ways than one.

“I never got a chance to congratulate you on your win, love, so congratulations.” Alex lifted his mimosa glass, making her come over to lift her empty one to cling together. “Here’s to the first of many awards for your incredible career.”

She smiled at him, but then announced she was heading out almost right after. The nice moment became a sour one for Alex. Still, he tried to be supportive. “Alright, love, have a good time. I’ll let you know if I end up going out with the boys, if you’d want to join us later.”

Rinan thanked him and surprised him by giving him a kiss on the cheek as she left. That girl had his heart and she didn’t even know it. Now, it seemed, she had two men’s hearts. Eventually, she would have to choose between them.

--------

When a knock came from his door, Dan jumped up from the balcony chair. He all but sprinted to it, excited to see Rin again. She stood on the other side of it, gorgeous as ever. Dan pulled her into his arms, burying his face in her hair and leaving soft kisses on her neck.

“I’m so glad to see you. I broke things off with Christina, and everything is okay.” He announced. When Rinan asked if she took it well, he grimaced. “Not so much, but she’ll get over it. We weren’t even together for two whole months. By the way, this belongs to you.” He handed her the lipstick Christina had found, and she tucked it away in her purse.

Dan put his hands in the pockets of his dark wash jeans. He was wearing a plain black t-shirt with a thin navy-blue hoodie over it. When Rin asked what he wanted to do, he smiled. “I was thinking we could visit the city, maybe go to the aquarium nearby, visit some of the touristy-places. There’s a fair in town, too!” He said excitedly, then kissed her firmly on the lips. “I just want to spend the day with you.”

[sinsiriuslyemo]

Good morning!!! Here is another episode of Cuba v DR!! In this episode, an investigation that Rafael is determined to build enough to make charges stick, and Izzy comes home from London early! Check out @missjennifercole for episode 16 later tonight!!

No translations

EPISODE 15

Rafael’s eyes were scanning the hallway as he walked towards Calhoun’s classroom, phone held up to his ear as Carisi trailed a few feet behind him wearing his bluetooth.

“You see him yet, Counselor?”

“Not yet,” Rafael replied, turning the corner and moving his eyes from left to right, searching.

Rafael spotted him when he turned to see him with Leila, running his fingers through her hair and smiling down at her. He whispered something in her ear and leaned down, kissing her.

“Two o’clock, Carisi. Brown jacket,” Rafael said into the phone, hanging up and shaking his head as he went into Calhoun's classroom.

Hannah was already inside when he got in, she smiled softly at Rafael before turning her attention back to the papers.

“Barba,” Rita greeted with a handshake. “Thank you for working on this final class.”

“It’s my pleasure, Counselor,” he replied just as the rest of the class began to file in. Leila wasn’t among them. “Think we’re missing one. She was just outside,” he mused, looking over to Hannah. “Would you mind sending her a text message and let her know that your professor asked me to count this towards the final grade?” he asked before he began to address the class. His eyes met Jaycee’s, nodding for her to begin presenting her argument first.

Hannah fired her off a text and she bit her lip when she received a response.

“She says she'll take the missing points,” she whispered.

Rafael turned his mouth downward, nodding his head in an annoyed amusement.

“It’s her education, not mine,” he mumbled, giving Jaycee his attention again.

When the class was over, he packed up his notes, and shook Calhoun’s hand again before he looked to Hannah.

“What’s going on? Yesterday he was assaulting her, humiliating her in front of everyone. Today he’s kissing her, and she’s skipping class,” he said matter of factly.

“He came over and apologized, told her that it was in her best interest to stay on his good side,” she said gently. “You need to leave though, I told her you were gone.” She said just as Leila walked in, her makeup smeared from crying, lipstick smudged as she wiped her mouth and glared at Hannah.

“You said he was gone,” she hissed angrily.

“Don’t take that tone with her,” Rafael said before Hannah could respond. “This is one of your best friends, not some stranger. What happened? Are you even going to tell me or are you just going to tell me to fuck off again for trying to help you?” he asked in a snarky tone, picking up his briefcase. “What you’re doing is dangerous.”

She shut her eyes tight as she tried not to cry.

“I'm not doing anything,” she whispered. “I'd rather be miserable than dead. At least now he's not pushing me down stairs or humiliating me,” she whispered.

“No, now he’s doing far worse. You may think, and he may think that’s he’s untouchable...but he hasn’t dealt with me yet,” Rafael replied, looking back at Hannah and Jaycee, who had come up to the front of the room. “Look out for her, both of you. Look out for your friend until I can put this little shit exactly where he belongs.”

With that, he walked out, taking out his phone and dialing Benson as he walked down the hall.

“I’m on my way to meet you,” he said.

“Good, then you got my voicemail? I'm at the 26th precinct holding cell right now.”

“I haven’t checked my voicemail, what are you doing there?” he asked.

“Your sister is here, she got picked up last night. I don't know many details, she hasn't use her one phone call and she hasn't said a word.”

“Son of a bitch,” he whispered, sighing heavily. “She’s supposed to be in London until Sunday. Alright, I’m on my way,” he groaned, hanging up and spotting Carisi sitting at a bench a few feet away from their suspect. He intended to walk by without saying a word to the kid, but apparently daddy’s boy had different plans.

As he approached, Rafael pressed a few buttons on his phone and set it in his pocket, continuing to walk towards the street.

“Hello again counselor,” he grinned, “I heard you were talking to my girlfriend. You know, if I were you, I wouldn't talk to her so much. People start to get the wrong idea…”

“And what idea is that? That she missed a class which counted towards her final grade? Are you afraid people may think you’re pressuring her to ruin her education? I don’t blame you.” Rafael didn’t stop walking while they talked, and even though when he turned to look at Cory, he couldn’t see Carisi in his peripherals, he sensed the Fordham Law graduate’s presence behind them.

“My girlfriend and I were consummating our relationship in the bathroom,” he smirked.

“That explains why she came into the classroom afterwards crying. Thank you, I was trying to make sense of that,” Rafael quipped with a cocky smirk, hailing a cab as he approached the sidewalk. “Anything of substance to add?” he asked, turning to look at the Cory.

“Just that I've heard some very...not nice rumors about you, some very bad people want you dead. You should stay clear of those people, speaking as a concerned friend,” he patted Rafael on the back and walked off.

“You’re not now, nor will you ever be my friend,” Rafael muttered in disgust, getting into the cab and taking out his phone. He smirked. Cory had threatened him twice during the conversation, and he’d gotten it all on tape.

For a moment he wondered if he could convince Leila to wear a wire, but he wasn’t counting on it. Giving the cab driver his destination, he considered his options before he would have to shift his focus to Izzy.

When he arrived at the precinct, Olivia met him out front.

“She got picked up 4am last night at a bar that got raided. She's still a little intoxicated.”

He sighed heavily, pinching the bridge of his nose and handed Olivia his briefcase.

“Would you hold this for me while I go see her?” he asked softly.

She nodded her head, taking his briefcase as the officer behind the desk buzzed him in. Moving towards the holding cell near the back of the precinct, he looked sadly at his youngest sister.

“Hermanita...why didn’t you call me?” he asked softly, sticking one arm through the bars.

Izzy said nothing, eyes lowered as she sat quietly in the cell. The girl looked like a mess, smeared makeup, hair frizzy and in knots and she looked like she'd been crying for hours.

“Iz, talk to me, please,” he whispered. “Don’t shut me out. Tell me what happened, why are you back early?” he asked softly.

“Katie called,” she whispered, saying nothing else, just staring at the cell bars. He closed his eyes, jaw clenching as he mentally cursed the woman who broke Izzy’s heart.

“I’m sorry, Iz...that’s what I said I wanted to talk to you about in my voice message. She asked me to meet up with her the night I got back, and I did.” She said nothing for a moment and he reached towards her, his fingers only reaching far enough to gently graze her hand in comfort. “Let’s get you out of here, and then we can talk about it, okay?” he said gently.

“I dunno if they'll let me out, I'm still kinda drunk,” she mumbled.

“You’ve been here for over four hours, and I’m here to make sure you get home without incident,” he replied. “There’s no reason for them to keep you. I’ll go pay the fines, and then we’ll get you home, okay?”

She shrugged, the kid looked beaten down and exhausted. Rafael went out and paid the fine before he pulled out his phone and dialed your number.

“Hey, I need a huge favor and you can not say no,” he said when you answered.

“Uh sure, what do you need?” you asked softly.

“I need for you to come to our place with the twins, and stay with Izzy for a little while. Please, I know you’re angry, I know you have a lot going on, but she needs family right now, and I can’t be there. Please.”

You thought for a long moment before sighing. “Fine,” you whispered. “I'll be there in ten.”

“Thank you.” He hung up and followed the officer back to the holding cell.

When they released her, she didn't move from her spot on the cell bed.

“Izzy, come on. Let’s get you home,” he said softly.

She shook her head, just hugging her arms around herself and sniffling. He went into the cell and sat on the bed beside her.

“Izzy, you can’t stay in here. Let’s get you home so you can shower…” She didn’t move except to shake her head again. “Y/N is coming by with the twins,” he said to her, stroking a hand over her hair. “Don’t you want to see your niece and nephew?” he asked softly.

She held her arms out to him, fully expecting to be carried. He couldn’t help but chuckle a little as he stood up.

“Okay, hermanita,” he said in a soft sigh, sliding his arms under her and picking her up, carrying her out of the cell. “I’m starting a little too old for this, sabes? One of these days, hermanita...I’m gonna break hip and you’re going to be the one changing my adult diapers,” he teased, kissing her forehead as he came out where Benson was.

Benson eyed his fully grown eighteen year old sister gripping tight to him like a toddler and smiled at him.

“I'll finish up the paperwork here, go ahead and go,” she patted Izzy's hair. “Take care of yourself sweetheart.”

“I’ll meet you at the apartment building in an hour, okay?” he said to Olivia, who nodded her head. “Come on my little baby. Let’s get you home safe and sound,” he said softly, moving to the curb and hailing a cab.

You were waiting in the hall with the twins in their stroller when he stepped off of the elevator, still carrying Izzy like a baby.

“My keys are in my pocket, would you grab them for me and open the door?” he asked you.

You smiled and nodded, opening the door as you let them in, setting the baby carriers down and heading to the kitchen to get some water. You handed it to Izzy as Rafael sat her on the couch.

“Drink,” you said gently, stroking your fingers through her hair. Izzy could barely make out the straw through the blur of tears that had gathered in her eyes, but she opened her mouth and let you prop the straw between her lips.

“It’s gonna be okay, hermanita,” Rafael whispered. “We’re here.” He snatched a tissue from the box on the end table and wiped Izzy’s nose for her.

“Why don't you hold your niece,” you said gently, grabbing Fiona and setting her in Izzy's arms. “Even when I'm crushed and feel like I can't go on, these little ones keep me going,” you said softly to her.

You watched Izzy trace her index fingers down over Fiona's nose and little lips, smiling when they parted to be fed.

“Hi Fiona, I'm Izzy…” she whispered. “I'm your…”

“Aunt,” you said gently and Izzy pulled you into a hug, crying against you as she hiccupped and sobbed onto the baby.

“It's okay,” you whispered gently. “It's okay,” you repeated.

Diamond walked into the club, the soft little bundle in her arms as she smiled and walked over to where Amber and Omar were seated on his break.

“This is Vienna,” she said softly.

“Like the...sausage?” Amber smiled gently.

“Amber,” Omar mumbled, slightly scolding. “She’s beautiful, Diamond.”

“Oh, it’s a boy,” Diamond replied, smiling brightly. “You wanna hold him?”

Amber smiled but shook her head sadly, “I'm okay, I'll never give him back if I hold him,” she chuckled and kissed the baby's head.

“Don't be silly!” She set the baby in Amber's arms and Amber smiled down at the infant.

“Hi there,” she whispered as she stroked the little boy's head. “Hola mi chorizo,” she whispered.

Omar’s smile fell suddenly and he looked at Amber.

“Did you really just call the kid a chorizo?” he asked in a chuckle.

“Vienna,” Amber said as if it made its own point. She hugged him tight and kissed his face, watching him coo and giggle as he patted her face. “So handsome,” Amber said as she kissed his chubby cheeks.

“Is Nevada around?” Diamond asked. “I have to ask when I can come back to dance, and then I have to go and buy baby food…” She thought for a moment, her eyes searching for words above her head. “Would that be where, like the pet food is?” she asked, furrowing her brows.

“Ay dios mio,” Omar mumbled. “Nevada’s been running the center. You were working there before you gave birth, why don't you stay there? You can leave the baby at the daycare group they have there.”

“I don't make nearly as much money,” she said sadly. “I'm raising little churro all by myself.”

“Chorizo,” Amber corrected.

“Yeah, that.”

“Okay, bueno...what’s your school schedule look like? This is your last semester right?” he asked her.

She nodded, “Yup, and then you're looking at Dr. Henley.” She giggled and kissed her baby. “I can do any night, I go to school during the days.”

“Okay, how about we ease you in with a couple of weeknights and Saturdays to start. If after the semester starts, you think you can take on more, we’ll add some shifts. Sound good?” Omar asked, smiling.

She nodded with a grin and hugged Omar before turning to watch Amber with the baby. “He likes you! He doesn't usually like people…” she smiled and blew a kiss at her son.

Amber cuddled tight to the baby and nuzzled him. “I can watch him for a while if you need a break,” she offered.

Diamond squealed in delight. “Awesome! I'm just gonna go to the back and nap for a little! You're the best!” She scurried off and Amber stayed with the baby, rocking him as she stroked his hair.

Amber smiled and laid back against Omar, baby in her arms as she smiled down at it. “I'm gonna need you to not say anything and let me enjoy this, okay? If this is all I get, I'm gonna fucking take it,” she said seriously. She'd come to terms with the no baby thing, she was okay with it, but she definitely missed the idea.

“I didn’t say a word,” he replied in a chuckle.

She just snuggled against him, rocking the baby and leaning up, kissing him hungrily. He kissed her back, pecking her nose after.

“Alright, I gotta get back to work. See you at home?” he asked.

“I love you,” she whispered softly.

“You talkin to me or the sausage?” he asked with a smirk.

“Both,” you teased, “Mostly you,” she blew him a kiss. “Chorizo,” she said with a smile, “Say bye bye to tio Omar,” she held the baby up to Omar who stared at the older man before burping.

“Bye,” he chuckled, moving to the office and working on fitting Diamond into the schedule.

Amber rocked the baby back and forth, smiling when his little eyes drifted shut.

“I might kidnap you,” she whispered to the infant.

Rafael met up to Liv in front of the apartment building of the late Michele Yarborough.

“You been in yet?” he asked, pointing to the entrance with his chin.

“No, her roommate still lives there but she's leaving. I went to the door but decided on waiting for you. It's up for rent right now so I made an appointment for us, honey.”

“Well then, let’s go look at our potential apartment, darling,” he replied, offering her his arm and walking inside with her. Luckily the roommate was still there with the realtor in case any potential buyers had questions about the place.

“Mr. and Mrs. Benson?” the realtor asked and Rafael gave a quick side glance to Olivia. Of course she would’ve insisted he take her name instead of her taking his.

“That's us,” Olivia smiled at the realtor, “I have to say, it's a gorgeous listing online, I couldn't believe it was so cheap! It isn't haunted is it?” she teased.

The realtor laughed as well. “No, as far as I know it isn’t haunted. Let me show you around. This way, please.”

Rafael let his eyes scan the still furnished apartment, looking for anything that might help them, though he wasn’t sure he’d find anything. After four years it was more likely that any physical evidence was long gone, unless there was foul play and the doer missed a spot somewhere. However in that instance, they would need a CSU team to dust and spray the entire apartment, which wouldn’t exactly be discreet.

“And this is the extra bedroom. It’s been empty for quite some time,” the realtor said. Rafael and Liv both noticed how the roommate, Rachael, lagged behind them, not daring to come near the bedroom. “It could be an office or perhaps a nursery,” the realtor continued, winking at Olivia.

“A nursery,” Olivia smirked at Rafael, “What do you think, baby? Do you want another one in the house?”

“How many kids do you have?” The realtor smiled as Olivia and Rafael entered the bedroom.

“One, his name is Noah and he's almost five now,” she smiled.

“How sweet!”

“He would love this room,” Rafael mused, smiling as he looked around. “I’m so sorry, would I be able to use the restroom?” he asked, smiling warmly at the realtor.

“Of course, it’s just across the hall,” she replied.

“Thank you,” he replied, nodding politely to Rachael as he passed her in the hall.

Locking himself inside, he looked around the drain of the tub, taking out one of the swabs Benson had passed to him downstairs and swabbing around the inside of the drain. It was a long shot, but they had to start somewhere. Flushing the toilet, he looked in the drain inside the sink and swabbed in there. He put the two swabs in separate bags and pocketed them before he came out again.

“I think I’m going to have a look around the kitchen,” he said with a smile, giving a subtle look to Liv, who nodded in understanding.

“Would you mind showing me the view from the balcony? I just love a good view,” she smiled at the realtor and let herself be led out onto the balcony.

Rafael watched Olivia ask Rachael a question, effectively leaving him alone in the apartment as she joined the other two women on the balcony. He made quick work of looking around, peeking into the drain and seeing a small piece of something blue stuck on one of the disposal blades. He eyed the counter and grabbed the wooden spoon from it’s holder with the other kitchen utensils, and stuck the end into the drain, turning on the garbage disposal. This caused the blades to jam and he turned off the disposal and replaced the spoon just as the women came back inside and walked into the living room.

“I think the disposal is on the fritz,” he said to the realtor with a frown.

“That’s weird...it worked this morning,” Rachael said.

“Oh no,” the realtor frowned, giving the switch a go, and sighing softly when it didn’t turn on. “I'll give maintenance a call and it'll be fixed by the time you move in,” she smiled reassuringly as she nodded for Liv to follow her into the bedroom next.

“Oh no, don’t bother. I could take a look at it. I’m pretty handy,” he offered with a smile, taking off his jacket and rolling up his sleeves.

“Well aren’t you sweet?” the realtor mused with a grin.

“You don’t have to,” Rachael said with a soft, thankful smile.

“It’s my pleasure. Probably just a piece of food or debris that got caught in there or a loose screw,” he replied. He opened the cabinet to expose the drain pipes under the sink and got down on the floor, beginning to remove the cap that held the blades of the garbage disposal in place.

“I’ll be with Linda and your wife if you need me,” Rachael said to him, biting her lip as she watched him work for a moment before she turned and went to join the other women.

“Thank you,” he answered, taking out the blades to get a better look at the thin, blue material,i t appeared to be very thin rubber, like rubber gloves. Bagging the blue fiber and replacing the blades before sliding a small button on the back over, he stood and turned on the water, flicking the switch and smiling when the disposal made it’s usual sound.

“You're resourceful,” Rachael said softly from behind him, having come back in. He smiled and turned off the disposal again, shutting the water off as shrugged.

“Nah, it’s just something I picked up during my college years. I was a broke college student so I had to learn how to fix things around my apartment instead of paying someone else to do it,” he answered. “Good as new. So how long have you lived here?”

“Six years, I moved in with my best friend right after high school,” she said gently.

“Oh, that’s nice,” he replied, smiling warmly at her. “Is she moving out with you?” he asked.

“She passed a few years ago.” The girl looked at her feet then shook her head and forced a smile onto her face. “Anyway, it's time for a new start for me, I've lived here long enough.”

“I’m sorry to hear about your friend,” he said sincerely. “You must be excited to begin a new chapter in your life,” he added, walking with her to where Liv and the realtor were discussing possible future renovations. “Are you staying in the city?” he asked casually.

She nodded, “With my fiancé, yes.”

“Congratulations,” he offered with a smile.

“Thanks...I must be honest with you, I love this place but everything reminds me of her, I just want to sell it and move on with my life, it just has too many painful memories.”

“I can certainly understand that,” he replied, nodding his head. “If you don’t mind me asking, how did she pass?” he asked gently.

She looked around and made a face, “Um, it was an accident, she had fallen off the balcony… it's not dangerous or anything. It was just a...sad mistake.”

“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry,” he said, giving her a sympathetic look and gently patting her shoulder. “Mistake? Had she been drinking?” he inquired curiously.

“Yeah, she'd just gotten some bad news from an ex and I think she hit the bottle a little too hard. She loved to sit up on the railing so…” She bit her lip and shook her head.

“I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine having to go through something so traumatic, losing a dear friend so senselessly,” he added sincerely. “Were you home when it happened?” he asked softly.

She looked about to say yes before she shook her head. “No, I wasn't here,” she whispered.

He’d noticed, but smiled at her. “Well, thank God for small favors,” he replied as Olivia and the realtor came back.

“So, what do we think, folks?” the woman walking beside Olivia asked with a smile.

“It’s wonderful,” Rafael answered. “What do you think, cariño?” he asked, looking at Olivia.

Olivia smiled, “I love it, but we still have a few places to see so we’ll be in touch with you soon,” she smiled and said their thank yous to Rachael and Linda as they left. When the door closed, Liv looked over at Rafael. “You get anything?”

“Mhm,” he hummed as they entered the elevator, once they were safely in the cart, he pulled out the bag with the piece of blue rubber. “What does that look like to you?” he asked.

“I'll be damned, a rubber glove,” she smirked. “You're a clever man. Good thing I married you,” she winked.

He chuckled softly around a smirk.

“It was in the garbage disposal, must’ve gotten caught on the blades. Blood will be gone by now but you run touch DNA off it, see if we can’t get a match to our suspect. His DNA will be in the system already...least it should be. You should have Fin run a check on Michele’s phone records from the night of her death too. I talked to the roommate and she said that Michele had just received bad news from an ex before she fell. She also said she wasn’t home when it happened...not that I believe her.”

“You think there was a witness?” Olivia asked, brows shooting up on her face.

“I don’t know,” he sighed.

“You never make things easy, do you? I’ll take you home to your sister and see what I can find.”

“Please remember, discretion. You know, I have to admit...it was kinda fun playing detective,” he mused, walking out with her to her car.

“Not thinking of changing careers on me, are you?” she teased.

“Please. It wasn’t that much fun,” he muttered, getting into the passenger’s seat for her to drive him home.

[contrivedcoincidences6]

The Bodyguard- Ch.4

Here is chapter four of me and @alittlemissfit ‘s bodyguart/txf crossover story! (Yes it is as amazing as it sounds)

If you need to catch up here are some links: 

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

When Mulder’s alarm sounds he nearly breaks the small clock with the force of his fist. He would have thought the previous night to be a dream if not for the pounding headache and the smell of a woman permeating his senses.

His memories are vague and blurry, but random images flicker across his mind: red hair, well manicured hands, a lovely, heart shaped mouth. He remembers being entranced, captivated but knows that could have been due to his drunken state. Rolling over on the bed he glances in the trashcan and sure enough, spots the used condom lying discarded on top.

Rubbing his forehead he stumbles into the kitchen to make some coffee. After preparing, sitting at his small table with the hot beverage he tries his damndest to remember the woman.

He knows she gave him her first name but all he can remember is it began with “K”. He flashes back to the feel of her small, soft hands on his body. The sound of her breathing and the spark in her eyes. He squeezes his eyes and tries to picture the previous night and finally remembers her name, Katherine.

Even with his tendency to get overly attached, she made enough of an impression to be on his mind after a night of heavy drinking. If that wasn’t motivation enough to try and find her. But a cold shower, some breakfast and three aspirin later he starts to come to his senses.

This woman hadn’t given him her last name, hadn’t left a phone number, and she made sure to be gone before he had the chance to wake up. It was pretty clear she didn’t want to be found. Not that that would stop him from re-living and romanticizing that night for the foreseeable future, from wondering who the hell this mystery woman was.

Laying his aching head down on the table Mulder lets out a loud moan. It was official. She would haunt him.

After the taxi dropped Scully off in front of her building, opting for the elevator rather than the stairs she lets herself into her apartment. Once inside she sheds her shoes, purse, and jacket haphazardly, ditching the rest of her clothes before climbing into bed, clad in just her underwear.

Curling up under the comforter she drifts off in minutes. Only wakes when the sun streams through her open blinds, burning through her lids and all but scalding her bloodshot retinas. Her head is pounding and her stomach gurgles with every movement she makes. Rubbing her hands down her slightly swollen face she groans, the memories of yesterday coming back to her.

Daniel. Bar. Fight. Hot guy. Sex.

Peering through her fingers at her nightstand, she sees the display on her digital clock. Noon. Good Lord.

The soreness between her legs tells her the sex had been as rough in reality as it was in her memories. She remembers his hazel eyes, his handsome smile, the way his ass muscles felt under her hands. She even remembers his name, which makes her laugh in spite of her feeling like shit.

Getting up from bed she ambles over to the bathroom, runs herself a bath hot enough to make her skin melt. Adding some lavender oil to help her headache she dims the lights, avoids falling asleep again by thinking about the man she’d slept with. She’d known even with a few drinks in her that she had no plan on pursuing him. His interest in her was obvious, which is why she left so quickly. The last thing she needed today was an awkward morning after.

After relaxing in the bath, feeling her headache starting to subside she drains the tub, throws on her fuzzy, worn robe and cuts over to the kitchen. Fixing herself some eggs, toast and a pot of coffee, no sooner does she take a seat at the table and start eating does her phone ring. The high volume making her head pulse all over again.

Refusing to answer until she has some food in her swirling stomach and some caffeine in her system, she lets it go to voicemail, grumbles at how loud the beep is.

““Hey Dana, it’s Monica. I’m sorry I couldn’t get back to you sooner but I got your message. What happened? Did you get the job? Anyway you’ll-”

“Hey Mon, I’m here,” she answers, holding the phone slightly away from her ear.

“Hey! Have you checked your email today?”

Free hand covering her face Scully shakes her head miserably, “No. I...I’m not feeling very well.”

“Did you just wake up?”

“Yeah,” she grumbles, eating a forkful of eggs.

“I could tell by your voice. What happened? Rough night?” Monica asks, a mix of concern and curiosity in her voice.

“You could say that.”

“Did you not get the job?”

“I’m actually not sure, I...I don’t think so though.”

“Not sure?”

“Yeah, things ended on a weird note,” she sighs, loading some egg onto her slice of toast before taking a bite.

“What’s going on though? Why do I need to check my email?”

“Well, you’re not off the hook. We will discuss this later,” Monica says firmly. “But this other thing is too important, I had to tell you.”

“Tell me what?” Scully asks, frowning.

“Waterson sent out an email this morning to everyone at Artemis. He’s taking a leave of absence!”

“What?”

“Apparently it came as quite the surprise. The board is looking for a temporary replacement.”

No longer feeling hungry, her nausea returning full force Scully gets up from the kitchen table, flops onto her living room couch.

“Daniel...he, he didn’t say why?” She tries to keep her voice even but Monica knows her well enough to sense that something is up.

“You don’t sound very surprised, Dana.”

“Well, I...I’m not.”

“Wait, what?”

Hand over her face Scully takes a breath, wanting to gather her thoughts before spilling everything to her friend. She knows if she tried to keep quiet about it all, Monica would just pry it out of her anyway, and she figures at this point she needs to hold on tight to the few friends she has at the company.

“Last night when Daniel asked me to his office, he offered me the detail.”

“Wait, he did? Congrats! I knew he’d see you were perfect for it!”

“But our meeting didn’t end after the conversation. He asked me to have a drink with him and and then…”

“Then what, Dana?”

“He made a move on me. He kissed me and then tried to take things further, kept touching me. He was all over me on the couch in his office, Mon. I told him to stop but wound up having to push him off of me. He...he’d had a few drinks but he knew full well what he was doing.”

Met with stunned silence on the other end Scully bit her lip, continued,

“After I ran out of the office I ran into Skinner. I wasn’t going to say anything but he must’ve seen the look on my face. He took me over to his office and I just, told him everything.”

“Do you think that he told-”

“He was pretty angry last night. At Daniel, not at me,” she clarifies.

“The day Skinman is angry with you is the day pigs fly, Dana,” Monica scoffs before going quiet on the other line.

“Monica? Are you still-”

“He really thinks he can just take a leave of absence and make this all disappear. Unbelievable.”

“I know, Mon. I-”

“You should file a sexual harassment suit against him. Nail his pervert ass to the damn wall.”

“Monica, no,” Scully sighs. “I understand why you’d say that and I feel the same way but…”

“But what? You’re in training to guard and protect people, Dana. You should start by protecting yourself!”

“I did protect myself. Last night. I got that son of a bitch off of me, I spoke out and now he’s gone. He’s not a problem anymore.”

“Until he comes back!”

“Filing a suit or pressing charges would cause me bigger problems now, Mon. It could cost me the detail, everything I’ve been training for, and he’d probably just wind up with a slap on the wrist anyway.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Actually, I do. Look, like it or not Artemis is a boys club. It’s taken me a year to get as recognized as Skinner and Doggett and Gibson were two months into their training,” she says bitterly, shaking her head. “I’ve come this far, Monica. I’m not about to throw it all away because the boss tried to put his hand up my skirt. I can handle unwanted attention from Daniel Waterston. I can’t handle losing everything I’ve worked for.”

Feeling her friend’s frustration through the phone, Scully chews her lip, waits for her to respond.

“Fine, okay. Whatever. But next time you need help handling Waterston, you’re calling me so we can both go Kill Bill on his ass.”

“It’s a deal. After the look on Skinner’s face last night though, if he got to Daniel I don’t know how much is left of him.”

“Good for Skinman,” Monica smiles, then speaks again after a beat.

“So you want to tell me why you’re hungover?”

Shaking her still aching head Scully sighs, “I went to that bar on Park for a drink afterwards.”

“A drink?”

“Okay, a few drinks.”

“That’s not like you to drink alone,” Monica frowns. “You should have called me.”

“I wasn’t exactly great company last night.”

“I just don’t like the thought of you sitting alone in a bar.”

Normally Scully would keep her mouth shut, not one to share much when it came to her love life, but when she was tired her mouth tended to move faster than her brain,

“I wasn’t alone.” As soon as she hears the words leave her mouth she wants to kick herself, feels her nausea creep back up.

“What?!” The excitement in her friend’s voice was evident. Scully hadn’t dated in a little over a year, at least not seriously since her breakup with Ethan. Once she learned this Monica was determined to set her up.

“I just…I met this guy. It wasn’t that big a deal. I’m not going to see him again.”

“Did you sleep with him?”

“Yeah.”

“Holy shit!” Monica exclaims. ”Wow, Dana. I’m not sure if I should be worried or excited. On one hand it’s completely unlike you, but on the other you really needed to get laid.”

Sighing, Scully slumps back further into the couch cushion, starts rubbing her right temple. Despite her condition, a small smile came across her face. She really had needed to get laid.

“Yeah, I did.”

“Was it good?”

“Very.”

“And you’re not going to see him again?” Monica asks, her voice getting higher at the end of the question

“I don’t need a boyfriend right now. Besides, he seemed like a bit of a mess anyway.”

While it was true he had seemed like a mess, Scully knew she wasn’t one to talk. The truth was he was charming and kind and in another time she might have stayed the night and gotten to know him. But as of right now, the last thing she needed was more complications in her life.

“Dana! Please say you got his number!”

“No, Mon. I didn’t.”

“Whose place did you go to?”

“His.”

“So you know where he lives then?” Monica asks, sounding hopeful.

“Yeah, like I said. Right now I’m really not interested.”

Monica lets out a long suffering sigh.

“You know that there’s other important things in life beside work right?”

“I know, I just want to get my life in order before I start any kind of relationship.”

“So you’re saying he seemed like relationship material?”

“Oh my God, Monica. You are worse than my mother!” Scully exclaims. “Look, when I meet the right guy it won’t be after a drunken one night stand, okay?”

“Agh, fine. Whatever.”

“I know you’re trying to help. But I’m a big girl. I’ll be fine. Like you said, I just needed to get laid. Now I can focus.”

“You mean on the new assignment? It sounds like before Waterston made a pass at you he gave you the job.”

“I mean, yeah, he did. But only because he thought it would get him in my pants, not because of my talent and hard work. We had a conversation about it, Monica, but nothing was finalized. And now that he’s gone, who the hell knows what’s going to happen.”

“But Skinner knew you were up for the job, right?”

“Yeah, but he didn’t mention it last night when he found me!”

“He was too busy making sure Waterston didn’t cause any lasting damage! But he knows you deserve it, Dana. Skinner will go to the mat for you on this. I’m sure of it.”

“But Monica, what if I don’t deserve it?” Scully asks, swallowing back a lump in the back of her throat. “What if all the recognition I’ve gotten has just been thanks to Daniel’s sex drive?”

“Even if he only singled you out for his perverted reasons, everyone else at Artemis knows you’re qualified. Look at your history! You were trained by NCIS for crying out loud,” Monica reminds.

“Don’t doubt yourself, Dana.. You deserve this and everyone knows it. Especially Skinner.”

“Well, maybe,” Scully sighs, tugging a throw blanket onto her as she curls up on her couch. “We’ll see what happens, I guess.”

[julianafarmer]

1. 9. 7. 14. 17. 20. 24. 25. 29. 32. 35. 40. 42. 46. 50. 86. 91. 94. 100.

Oh boy. You must be in love with me or something. I probably know you. Chicken, just ask me ❤

1: What is the real reason you are confused right now?

I’m confused about a lot of things right now. I’m confused as to why you asked me so many things anonymously. You can totally just message me and ask anything you wanna know. I don’t bite. Not without consent, anyway. But I’m also really confused about a person I really like right now. I like them quite a lot. Kind of an embarrassingly massive crush. I’m not sure how they feel about me, and I’m too afraid to ask or push. They’re pretty aloof and distant sometimes, and I’m someone who needs consistent validation and affection in order to feel secure. I’m confused on whether or not I should hold on and hope things become closer, or cut my losses and not try for a relationship.

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?

No. It’s been a little while since I’ve kissed someone. I wish someone would kiss me tonight. I’ll give my address to anyone who wants to come kiss me, damn. I’m a slut for kisses. And cuddles. 

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?

Probably cry. A lot. And then immediately harden my resolve to make them miserable. I deserve better and I deserve to be valued. The last person that cheated on me… well… Let’s just say I stole his girlfriend.

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

My fucking self. And I have this friend… She’s pretty much the embodiment of Murphy’s Law. She’s always getting herself into these absolutely awful situations almost daily. I can’t even hang out with her anymore because something tragic happens to ruin it. She owes me money still. She promised she’d pay me back with interest, but that was over a month ago. She hasn’t even said anything about it. 

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?

Yes. Falling for someone is really scary for me now because of him. I’m afraid of becoming attached to people now. I’m afraid of falling in love. I don’t trust it because experience has taught me that falling for someone means that I’m going to get fucked over. I hate him so much for ruining my happiness in every relationship since.

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

I thought about the three people I care for most right now. My three most important people. My best friend, the person I’m in a relationship with, and the person I’m starting to develop feelings for.

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

Absolutely. @fetishforfresh. I know you’ve left tumblr. Probably forever. And I know you’ve left me. Probably forever too. I pushed you away. I was the shitty friend. All you’ve ever done is shown me love and compassion and kindness. I’m the fuck up. I’ve tried to call you every day and I only get your voicemail. I just wish you would talk to me again. I miss you. I love you. You were my best friend and I fucked up.

25: In the past week, have you cried?

Bitch, I cried yesterday. I cry several times a fucking week.

29: Do you have a best friend?

Yes! I have lots of best friends! But if I had to pick one, I’d say that my absolute bestie of all time is @thereisacactusinsideme. No joke, I wouldn’t be alive without this motherfucker. We’ve had fights, but everyone does. I think it says a lot that we can put our shit aside at the end of the day and realize that we mean too much to each other. I love you. You’re my family. When I’m with you, I feel safe. I feel home. I feel like nothing can hurt me because you’re there. You have my back, and you can bet your stretched out, shaven gay ass that I’ll always have your back too.

32: Are you mad at anyone?

Literally all of my exes and anyone close to them. 

35: How many more days until your birthday?

155 days. July 4th is my birthday. Miss independence.

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

No. Every single person that I have ever kissed, I’ve done so deliberately and with great thought or enthusiasm behind it. Maybe long after the fact, but I’ve never lost sleep or felt shitty about kissing someone. 

42: Are you available?

For you? Absolutely. Just be better than the last several douchebags I’ve been in relationships with. Trust me, the bar is set ridiculously low.

46: Do you regret anything?

I regret dating my very first boyfriend. Let’s just call him N. He was abusive. Both sexually and emotionally. I regret dating him, and I certainly regret not leaving him sooner than I did. I was with him for two years. That’s two years I’ll never get back. I hate myself for allowing myself to be so weak and in such a dangerous position. I should’ve done something sooner.

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

Because I’m afraid they’ll think I’m too clingy or too needy. They come off as the sort of person who is very nonchalant about relationships. I don’t think they take it seriously. I don’t want to be out there with serious emotions when they’re not putting themselves out there for me too. I want something consistent and stable where I don’t have to second-guess that I’m cared about and wanted. Mainly because I’m just fucked up from past shit. That and… I guess you could say I’m trying the polyamory thing. I’m afraid of being involved with too many people at once. Right now, It’s only a serious romantic attachment with one person. But this person that I like… well… I don’t know if I’m ready to pursue them as well. I don’t know if they want me. I don’t know if it’s mutual.

86: How can I win your heart?

Kiss me a lot. Cuddle me a lot. Always hold my hand, even if it’s getting sweaty. If you’re too far away for that, skype me. All the time. Every day. Make it so that I don’t even feel the distance. Message me when we can’t skype. I want to be a part of your everyday life, and vice versa. Tell me everything. Past, present, and future. I’ll listen. Ask everything about me. I’ll tell you. I’ll be completely honest. I won’t hold anything back. Above all, don’t let me second-guess that you care. Be open about how you feel towards me, and always remind me. Always tell me things that make me giggle and blush, or stubbornly deny them because I don’t think very highly of myself sometimes. Make me always feel safe around you. Be spontaneous. Be silly and crude and vulgar and random. Watch movies, tv shows, and anime with me. Play minecraft with me. Play any PC game with me. Shower with me. Be with me when I’m having an anxiety attack. Hold me as I cry and hyperventilate. Tell me to keep breathing. If I ever tell you that I need to be alone, don’t let me be alone. I say that because I actually want to be with someone, but I’m too stubborn to ask for help. Be my best friend.

Just… give me everything and I fucking swear to you that I’ll give everything back.

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?

I want a relationship more than anything right now. A stable, healthy, consistent relationship. I don’t want any doubts or fears. I just want to be happy with someone and have them be happy with me too. The relationship I’m in right now is pretty troubling. I’d leave him if I had a safer person to be with. I’d leave him if there was someone I loved more. 

Honestly, I’m his plan-B. He’s 18 and he had a 16-year-old girlfriend before me. Her parents found out about the age difference and made her leave him. But.. he’s still in contact with her. He still loves her more than anything. He loves her more than me. He’s just… settling for me. He’s settling for me until she’s legally an adult. He’s waiting for her and setting a time limit on me. I feel so shit about the whole thing. 

I want someone who can just… be with me. No complications.

94: Name four things that you wish you had!

Money to pay for the tuition of the college I want to go to. A partner I feel completely secure with. A new phone because mine is super old and broke as hell. A consistent job.

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?

Yeah. Fuck yeah. Date me. Sorry for calling y’all out.

@abovethepeople @fetishforfresh @monsterinmybloodstream @shap-kid (woops my secret is out, I’m a shitlord) @thereisacactusinsideme (Too bad you like dick in your ass) @corrupttheinnocence @imperatorsapphiosa @gravitymango @too-bored-for-you 

honestly like all of my mutuals. I’ll date em all. You guys rock.

Anyway! Thanks for that, anon! You gave me a nice therapeutic introspection hour. I kinda cried a lot while typing up #86, but oh well. That was fun. Please don’t be shy. Message me.

[modelingmariella]

Week From Hell Day 2: Why Is There Joy In This Poison

Something was touching her neck. Repeatedly and rapidly. At first she tried to shrug it off but it wouldn't stop. Eventually she opened her eyes and regretted it. Her head exploded in pain, vision blurred, someone felt the need to kiss her awake.

“Who the hell are you?” She groaned.

“How did you forget who I am? We spent the whole night together.”

“I was drunk and now I am hungover and in no mood.”

“No need to tell me about being hungover.”

Was he even cute? She had no idea and she didn’t even care. She rolled back over and buried her face in the pillow. “You need to leave.”

“What?”

“Leave! I’m going to go barf my brains out and you need to be gone.” She stumbled out of bed and made her way to the bathroom. Her lover for the night collected his things and presumably left. She could hear the door open and close.

This was only day two of what would be hell on earth. She had to talk to her dad and Eva after blowing them off all night. But that would be later. Much later…

***

The ringing was torture. Just waiting for Eva to respond made the knot in her stomach worse and worse until she almost hung up.

“Mari what the hell! Where have you been?”

“Don’t yell I just got the headache to pass.”

“What happened?!”

“I got drunk… like really drunk…”

“Why?”

“I don’t know~”

Like a slap in the face everything came flooding back. Her step family being monsters and her father choosing them for life. It was childish to think that way but damn it she couldn't see it any other way. “That bitch is pregnant!”

“Nora?”

“No not that pig. The other one.”

“Caresa? Wasn't your dad going to divorce her?”

“Yes! And now she is pregnant!” Maybe it was the hangover, or maybe it was just her saying it out loud. Mari found herself back in the bathroom. Her phone still on in the other room. Talking with her dad would have to wait.

***

It was sometime in the afternoon and she still looked like she just rolled out of bed. Her breakfast was coffee and a light sandwich she hoped to hold down.

So many voicemails and zero patience to go through them. She already talked to Eva and couldn’t stomach hearing her dad’s panicked voice. She was so focused on deleting the missed messages she almost swiped the ignore call when her dad called.

“Hey,” Was all she had to say when she turned the call speaker phone.

“Mariella are you alright?” He sounded heartbreakingly worried. She wanted to cry for acting like she had, but she held it in.

“I’m fine.”

“You sound terrible.”

“Well that happens when you down a lot of vodka dad.”

“Do you even remember last night?”

“No I don't,  and I don't care to remember yesterday at all. That's why I got drunk.” Mariella was in the process of making coffee. Her father remained silent. promptly decorated the coffee how she saw fit and began eating the sandwich. It was the worst silence of her life.

“Do you hate me?”

“No Mariella, I could never hate you. I just want us all to sit down~”

“No! I will do no such thing.”

“You can't carry this~” He didn't get to finish his sentence she hung up and turned her phone off. How dare he insist such a terrible idea?

Some hours had passed and Mari had finally finished talking to Miko about all the events she missed. He was more than understanding and very worried for both parties. He had to head to London and attend the events Mari would be missing. Her stomach had settled and now she was starving and delivery was her best option.

Moments after completing the order an unknown number popped up and if she hadn't realized it was an Italian phone number she wouldn't have answered.

“Who the hell is this?”

“Is this how you greet people all the time?”  Caresa asked appalled anyone dared to speak to her that way.

“The hell do you want?”

“Your father wants you to come to dinner with us.”

“I wouldn't say this to my dad but I’m saying it to you so someone understands: Fuck no. I am not going. And you can go fuck yourself.”

“Can you just clean up your mouth for once?”

“Can you not be a manipulative bitch?”

“I don’t have to take this I am pregnant!”

“Cause you’re a hoe!” She hung up and shut her phone off only to throw it across the room. Hopefully that kitten shaped case would do it’s job.

***

A half an hour of silence passed. It was glorious and helpful for her dull headache. And then a knock happened. There could be nothing good on the other side of that door.

“Dad why are you here?”

“You and I need to talk and I am not leaving until we do.” He seemed even disappointed by her disheveled appearance. She was still in her pajamas, no makeup and her hair wasn’t done, she rarely let anyone see her like this. She was too high maintenance…

With an eyeroll she let her dad inside and sat in the living room with the last of her coffee. “I will not sit there and talk to them over dinner.”

“Yes Mari you will.”

“Scusa?”

“Don’t start Mari~”

“Don’t start? Are you serious?”

“You freaked out, got drunk, and shut everyone out. Refused to tell me where you were! And when we finally get ahold of you, you babbled on nonsense and told us to fuck off! And this isn't the first time you’ve done this!”

Mari was beyond shocked. Her face hot with anger she was practically seeing red.“Those two whom you love so much make me like this!”

Her dad shook his head, “They didn't force you to drink. I wanted to talk to you earlier, but you stormed off. Yes Caresa is pregnant we can’t change that. We need to find some common ground for Gabi and our other child. So come to dinner with us. For me.” he seemed so defeated. There was nothing more to be said.

“Ugh! Where and when?”

***

“Look who showed up?”

“I’m not here for you Nora. I’m here because of my dad.”

“Oh really because last night you didn’t give a shit about him.”

Mari glared at the younger woman. She could easily jump the table and stab her with a fork. Instead she turned around and started walking away.

“Drama queen.”

“Say one more thing~”

Caresa stood up blocking Mari’s view of Nora. “I will put your ass in jail don't think I won't.”

“Oh I’m so scared.” She turned at looked at her dad who was trying to get his wife seated. “Can I leave now?”

“No Mari we haven't solved anything.”

“She’s not sane!” Nora huffed.

“And you're a pig.” Mari sat down as Gabi reached for her. She was the good thing about this dreaded dinner. “I’m missing work for this. Do you understand that? I missed a huge paycheck and new opportunities because I’m firced to play nice with you.”

Gabi buried her head in Mari’s chest while Mari ranted.

“I want my daughter back. Give her to me.” Caresa snapped, but she fussed the moment her dad tried to lift her from Mari’s arms. From that moment on the tension was thicker than oil.

“Giovanni I’ve had it~”

“No! Listen to me all three of you! We are reaching some common ground. We can't do that if you all keep bickering!”

Of course their poor server came over with their food in the midst of an argument. She kept a smile and cool demeanor as she sorted out their orders and offered refills on their drinks.

“She’s ridiculous!” Nora wasn’t done so Mari fought back.

“She’s also a bitch.”

“Clean up your language in front of Gabi!” Mari put her sister in the high chair and moved it next to her. She let them argue it out while she ate her food. This was absolutely pointless, but her dad seemed determined to get somewhere. Mari continued to watch the kickoff show for WWE’s Roadblock until it was time for the main show to start.

Renee mentioned that the tag team match with New Day and Cesaro was up first. Music to her ears. She couldn't keep the smile off her face. If only he was here…

“And you call me desperate.” Nora scoffed but Mari was in her happy place. She ignored the two problems at the table and went about the dinner like it was nothing. From the start the match was crazy. There would be no clear winner until the very end.

After a crazy match a quick finish called for a change of champions. She didn’t care how loud her squeal was or if anyone stared as she got up practically dancing over the win. But Caresa cared.  

“You are making us look like fools!”

Mari promptly walked over to the bar and ordered herself a bottle of champagne for the table.

“So with that settled, I’m toasting to me, my future marriage to Cesaro, and better things in the next year. And maybe I can drown these terrible memories by the time I finish this bottle.” At this point she had given up. There was no fixing things. And if they insisted on bringing her down she wouldn't go without a bang.

***