#benji is the reason why jason is able to love veronica: and here's my essay to prove it.
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when jason dean was sixteen , he moved to gilbert , arizona . it was hot and shitty and humid as fuck , making it hard to wear his trench coat at any given time . it’s been three years since the death of marissa dean , his mother , and two months since he legally changed his name from jaimie dean to jason dean .
by the time big bud and jason moved to gilbert , it was only a month until finals before summer break . unfortunately , jason still had to attend classes and then do the finals , even if he would only be attending the school for this time . after all , he wouldn’t be returning in the fall .
insert chemistry class , and one benjamin knott .
he’s one of , if not the most , beautiful boys jason’s ever seen . untamed light brown hair , circular glasses that are a little bit too small for his face , brilliant brown eyes . he wore ridiculous patterned shirts , too bright and loud for jason’s taste , but he wore them well . right off the bat , he offered to help catch jason up to speed . and , though jason knew what he was doing , he couldn’t say no to him .
everyday after school was spent in the library , benji catching him up on pre - calculus , with jason pretending not to know what the fuck he was doing so they could spend more time together . to this day , he has no idea if benji knew that jason was bullshitting about being bad at math –––– all he remembers is benji’s face lighting up when jason presents him with a 97 on the final , saying it was all because he learned from the best . when summer eventually came , they’d go to each other’s houses . well , they mostly went to jason’s . big bud was normally out on site during the day , meaning the house they rented was mostly empty . days were spent playing the original legend of zelda and castlevania , fucking around arizona , taking day trips into phoenix and fucking around metrocentre .
nights were just as killer , though . most of the day trips turned to crashing there , sneaking into long wong’s on mill with fake ids that barely got them in , letting benji convince him to roller skate , and when jason confessed he didn’t know how , showing him by holding his hands and keeping him steady . the night benji taught jason how to roller skate , an hour outside of the homes they were supposed to be at , where nobody knew who they were , jason kissed him for the first time , surrounded by neon lights and horrible disco music and gaggles of people .
from then on , they weren’t just benji and jason , they were benji AND jason . you couldn’t find one without the other . benji was there when jason bought his motorcycle , held onto him tightly from the back of it as jason took sharp turns and laughed so loud it was like he was finally free .
benji was jason’s first everything . first kiss , first boyfriend , first panic of having to jump out of a window at seven am half dressed because benji’s father was approaching the door and jason was most definitely not allowed to stay the night . and , for three months , that was what benji was to jason –––– everything .
but , when august was coming to an end , and the courts had finally , finally given big bud dean the green light for tearing down an abandoned warehouse where they used to ship out hay to the rest of the country , they knew there wasn’t a way to keep their relationship alive . it wasn’t to say that they didn’t love each other , because they did . they were young and in love . but keeping a gay long distance relationship steady in the eighties , when one person moves around no less than six times a year ? it wasn’t salvageable . on august 29th , the two of them bought castlevania ii : simon’s quest , finished it the �� same day . they went to phoenix that night , got high and went rollerskating , made out in one of the booths where no one could see them , then made it back to gilbert at two am . benji helped him finish packing his clothes .
well , except one thing . a trench coat , not his signature black one , but a light blue one , not as heavy , very lightweight . perfect for arizona heat . jason made sure he left that one behind , snuck it into benji’s overnight bag with a smile and a turquoise necklace in the left pocket .
they locked eyes as the car pulled away from the rental house , jason’s motorbike in the trunk , but his eyes staring out the passenger mirror , so he could look at benji as they drove off . neither of them cried , no , most of the tears were saved for the night before and for when both of them were alone . it was an amicable break up –––– a breakup that let them still have a piece of each other’s hearts . the next place is las vegas , for a little while , jason debates on taking his bike and driving the five hours back south just to kiss benji one last time . but the day he decides he’s going to do it , big bud says it’s time to move again , and then they go to boston , then miami , seattle , evansville , sherwood .
it would take four years for the two of them to be reunited again . veronica and jason are living in a small city in connecticut called meriden . it’s the perfect halfway point between their schools –––– jason was going to columbia university for music , and veronica was going to harvard for ancient studies and an education degree . it worked out nice . neither of you necessarily liked connecticut ( when your dad’s business was stable , you lived in hartford , so it wasn’t horribly unfamiliar , but it brought bad memories ) , and you both decided that new york would be where you would move after veronica graduated , since she would be doing so early .
but the point is , jason went to college in new york , and he loved it . for the first time in his life , he had real , genuine friends . veronica called jason , sebastian , and carey the terrible trio , because they were just that . always fucking around , causing chaos because why not ? carey was fucking batshit , a total asshole and loud as fuck , the biggest prankster jason had ever meant . sebastian was dry humor and really good timing , the muscle , an absolute giant but one of the softest people he had ever met . friends , true , genuine friends .
columbia is where jason finds benjamin knott again , still wearing those obnoxiously loud dress shirts , still with glasses that are a little bit too bit . still just as gorgeous as he remembers him . when they locked eyes , for the first time in four years , they both cried . they skipped both of their next classes , hanging out , hugging each other so fiercely that jason was afraid one of them might get hurt . against all odds , they were in each others lives again , and this time , they weren’t going to let each other go .
and , really , they couldn’t . they had a bond that couldn’t be broken , and it only grew as time went on . jason’s friend group expanded from three to eight in a matter of about a week , including himself . they called themselves the bachelor party , because veronica told the other seven about how sad jason was at the idea of not having any friends so he couldn’t have his own bachelor party one day . thus , the bachelor party was born .
benji is jason’s best man at his and veronica’s wedding . his speech brought tears to everyone’s eyes , including his own . it was heart wrenchingly beautiful , the way he talked about the boy with an ash covered heart , the boy he knew when he was young , and who that boy ended up becoming .
veronica and jason couldn’t have children naturally . as a trans man , it would’ve been impossible . but veronica wasn’t short on either money or time . science was what lead them to have their first born daughter , athena celeste sawyer - dean . the day that she was born , jason got two new members into his family . his daughter , and benji , athena’s god father . the two of them were linked , forever . when jason’s son , julian gordon sawyer - dean , was born three years later , benji became his god father , too . and when benji and his husband , michael bloomfield , adopted their daughter , bridget , jason became her god father .
in a way , benji and jason are definitely soulmates . just , maybe not in a traditional way . everyone can have multiple . veronica is the love of jason’s life , the reason he gets out of bed , his holy grail . but benji was jason’s first love . and without him , jason wouldn’t have been able to love veronica , or anyone . he put the foundation down for jason to be able to heal , and that’s the best thing he could have ever done for him .
#so this took me about four hours to write.#PLEASE read this. i mention benji in a lot of threads. he's so fucking important.#benji is the reason why jason is able to love veronica: and here's my essay to prove it.#it's really fucking long. maybe sixteen paragraphs.#❝ 🔪 » headcanon. / everyone’s life has got static.
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