#because steve can’t handle anyone else????

[lovebugism]

#20 from the jealousy, jealousy prompt list with steve pls 🫶🏼

steve doesn't realize he's in love with you until he gets a glimpse of you with someone else (fwb to lovers, fluff, 1.2k)

Steve Harrington spent the entire summer thinking he was the only one who thought your Scoops Ahoy uniform was way hotter than should be allowed. 

The thigh-high socks. The short skirt. The pretty ascot tied around your neck. It was a diabolical concoction. And, yeah, sure, the sailor theme was an acquired taste, but Steve has always been a firm believer that you could wear anything and make him fall to his knees. He’d worship you like a goddess in a goddamn parka, he’s that far gone for you.

The only problem is he thought he was the only one.

He loved you so much that everything else just became white noise. There was never any room for anyone else to love you ‘cause he adored you the most. Or he thought so, at least — until a pretty boy with circle glasses and a chiseled jawline talked you up at the front counter. For ten fucking minutes straight.

He watches the stranger cross the threshold of Scoops, with a sundae in his hand and a dumb smile on his stupid face. “Who was the guy?” Steve blurts from the opened partition the second he’s gone. He folds his golden arms over the countertop, biceps threatening to burst from the navy sleeves of his uniform.

“A friend,” you answer casually as you sort change in the register.

His fluffy brows pinch then relax a moment later. He pouts at the vague response because he can’t handle not knowing. “Seems like you two are real close,” he lilts, trying hopelessly to play it cool.

“We are, actually,” you tell him. You drop the remaining quarters into their designated section and flash him a pretty look over your shoulder. “I’ve known him since I was a teenager— sophomore year, I think?”

Steve nods slowly, feigning interest. “Ah. High school sweethearts, then?”

You slide the opened register closed with your hip. It clunks shut behind you as you spin around to face him. You walk the short distance to the back counter, skirt swishing around your thighs as you go. Steve tries hard not to pull away when you lean in towards him, choosing to bask in your unwavering stare and intoxicating perfume instead.

“You should watch what you say, Harrington,” you caution lowly. “I’m gonna start to think you’re jealous.”

He scoffs. “I am not jealous.”

“No?”

“No! No way,” he answers, too quickly to be convincing. “We’re— We said we were gonna do the whole unlabelled thing, so… That’s what we’re doing.”

You nod once. “Great,” you hum with a tightlipped smile, spinning away once more.

The door to the breakroom squeaks open a moment later. Steve lingers in the entryway, shifting on his feet like a nervous child in a sailor’s uniform. Crossing his arms over his chest, he peers at you through his lashes. 

“But it wouldn’t be, like, the worst thing in the world if I said I wanted to be the only one who, you know, looks into your eyes, and… holds your hands, and… hears you laugh…” he wonders lowly, scrunching the bridge of his nose. “Right?”

You don’t realize how big you’re smiling when you look back at him. “No,” you shrug, all cool despite your skipping heart. “It wouldn’t be the worst thing.”

“Good,” Steve grins.

The small of your back digs into the counter’s edge when you turn to face him. You meet his pretty face with a sheepish one. “But it does go against everything we talked about it.”

The boy shrugs. “Well, then, screw it,” he blurts. 

“What?”

“I take it back.”

You laugh before you mean to. The golden sound echoes through the empty store. “That quickly?”

“Hush,” he pouts.

“It took me talking to some guy — who might as well be a stranger to me now, by the way — to change your mind about wanting to date me?” you elaborate with narrowed eyes.

Steve cowers under your stare. “…Kinda. Yeah.”

“So, what?” you scoff. “We’re boyfriend-girlfriend now?”

“If you wanna be.”

You grin up at him while he approaches you, all slow like he’s stalking prey — only you don’t entirely mind being hunted. “Pretty soon, we’ll be playing house if we’re not careful,” you joke, smoothing your palms up his torso.

A crooked grin blossoms on his pink mouth at the thought. “That doesn’t sound like a bad idea, actually,” he mumbles lowly.

“Steve…” you huff.

He laughs and cradles your jaw between softly calloused palms. “What?” he hums as he ducks down to kiss you. Your lips lock in a fleeting kiss — an innocuous spearmint-strawberry-chapstick concoction.

You let him kiss you, but your pout never wavers. “You can’t just say something like that and expect me to move on,” you murmur.

“I like you?” he shrugs. “So what?”

“So what?” you parrot with a laugh. “We’re not kids anymore, you know? Relationships are pretty serious now, Steve.”

“It doesn’t have to be.”

You meet his doe-eyed look with a sterner glare. “That’s the problem. That’s why we agreed to keep things lowkey. ‘Cause you can’t be serious about anything.”

“I can’t be serious about some things,” Steve insists with a boyish twist to his scruffy features. You arch your brow to egg him on. “Well, you, for starters— I haven’t even looked at anyone since I started seeing you, so… That’s gotta be a start, right?”

Your brows scrunch softly together. You don’t mean to look as shocked as you do, but you can’t help it. “You haven’t?”

“No,” he answers, chiseled features swirled like he’s tasted something sour. The thought never even crossed his mind despite distinctly keeping your relationship (or lack thereof, maybe) completely casual. “Have you?”

“No! I just… I thought that maybe you were, you know, keeping your options open or whatever.”

“So that means you’re not canoodling with Mister Jawline, right?” he jokes with a hopeful glint in his honeyed gaze.

You roll your eyes but decide to humor him anyway. “No, Steve,” you deadpan. 

He grins, prettier than should be allowed. “Good.”

You squint up at him. “Which means you’re not canoodling with Miss Redhead-Nice-Boobs, who comes in every week just to talk to you. Right?”

Steve’s brows furrow. His dark eyes flit between both of yours as he tries to figure out who exactly you’re referring to. “Who?” he wonders with a cartoonish lilt to his voice.

You’re pout deepens ‘cause you don’t know what he’s playing at. Her name’s Cherry — which you think is pretty easy to remember, considering her fiery auburn curls and ruby red lipstick. She’s tall and lean and effortlessly beautiful. Too pretty to be jealous of. You can’t help but admire her.

So Steve’s confusion is equally dumbfounding.

“You do like me, don’t you?” you murmur with a suspicious squint.

He laughs. “Does that surprise you?”

“A little bit. Yeah.”

His nose scrunches. “Still wanna be boyfriend-girlfriend with me, though?”

You purse your lips to the side and pretend to ponder the question “Sure,” you shrug after a few moments, rising to the tips of your toes to smack a quick kiss to his mouth. 

You greet a group of customers a second later, while Steve restocks the tubs of ice cream. Totally casual. Not at all lovesick.

Well… maybe a little.

[brunchable]

The Door's Locked, but My Lips Aren't | Steve Rogers x f!reader

Pairings: Steve Rogers x f!reader Themes: Forced Proximity. Rivals with Benefits? Verbal Sparring, Flirting through bickering. Summary: When you went to the Avengers' storage room for a quick errand, the last thing you espected is to get stuck with Captain Smug himself, Steve Rogers. With the door refusing to budge, who knew being trapped with your most annoying teammate would lead to an infuriatingly good kiss? A/N: This has been sitting in my drafts for a while. . .

It was just a quick errand to retrieve some equipment. That’s what you told yourself as you headed toward the storage room at the Avengers compound. You were hoping to get in and out without running into anyone—specifically him. But the universe seemed to have a twisted sense of humor.

Because standing right in front of the exact shelf you needed was Steve Rogers, his back turned as he inspected a box of supplies.

You stopped in your tracks, sighing so deeply it felt like your soul left your body. “Oh, for fuck’s sake,” you muttered under your breath, half considering turning around and coming back later.

“What was that?” Steve asked, voice gratingly smug as he turned to face you, an eyebrow raised.

“Nothing,” you said, voice tight and overly polite as you marched past him, heading for the door you’d only half-closed behind you. “Just talking to myself.”

“Not much company then, is it?” Steve’s tone was all mock innocence as he leaned casually against the shelf, crossing his arms and giving you that infuriating, smirking look that made you want to either punch him or… or do something else. But that was beside the point.

You shot him a glare, reached for the door handle, and turned it. It didn’t budge.

“What the—” You pulled again, harder this time. Still nothing.

“Great,” Steve said, his voice dripping with faux sympathy as he peered over your shoulder. “Look what you did.”

“What I did?” You whirled on him, the door handle rattling in your hand. “You were already in here. If anything, it’s your fault.”

“How is it my fault?” Steve looked almost amused now, leaning closer, too close, with that damn infuriating smile of his. “You’re the one who walked in and—what? Forgot how to use a door?”

Your lips parted in shock, and you jabbed a finger into his chest, making him step back. “No, I’m not the one who broke it! What’d you do, Captain America? Shove it too hard with those freakishly big hands of yours?”

Steve blinked, his gaze flicking to your hand still resting on his chest, then back up to your face. Something flared behind his eyes—something hot and challenging.

“First of all,” Steve began slowly, his voice dropping to that low, dangerous murmur, “my hands aren’t freakishly big. They’re just right.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” you shot back, words laced with challenge. “You know what they say about guys who talk too much about their size.”

“Oh yeah?” Steve’s gaze dipped to your lips briefly before snapping back up to meet your eyes, a smug smile forming. “What do they say about girls who—” He paused, gaze dropping to your chest and then back up, brow raised. “—can’t seem to fill out a shirt?”

Your mouth dropped open. “You did not just—”

“What?” Steve shrugged, unbothered by the murderous look in your eyes. “I’m just saying, if you wanna talk size—”

“Oh my god, you are unbelievable.” You threw your hands up, your heart pounding with a mix of embarrassment and irritation. “You think I care about your opinion?”

“Nope, not at all,” Steve said, smirking. “But you’re the one getting worked up.”

“I’m not worked up.” You shot him a fiery look before grabbing the hem of your shirt and yanking it over your head, leaving you in only a snug tank top. “See? Nothing to hide, nothing to be ashamed of.”

Steve’s eyes widened for a fraction of a second, flicking over your bare arms and shoulders, then lingering on the curve of your neckline. His grin widened.

“There, was that so hard?” he murmured, voice lower now, his gaze hot.

“Don’t get too comfortable,” you bit back, feeling both a thrill and annoyance at the way he looked at you. “I bet you’re feeling warm too. Maybe you should lose a layer.”

“You just wanna see me without a shirt on, huh?” Steve said, his grin widening as he slowly began unbuttoning his shirt. “Alright. Whatever makes you feel better.”

You swallowed as inch by inch, Steve’s chest was revealed. He didn’t stop until his shirt was completely unbuttoned, hanging loosely over those stupid, sculpted muscles.

“Happy?” Steve asked, voice a low rumble that sent shivers down your spine.

“Not as happy as you probably think,” you bit out, hating the way your voice wavered.

“Mmhmm. Sure.” He leaned even closer, his breath brushing your ear. “It’s okay to admit you’re curious. I get it.”

“Curious about what?” you scoffed, but your voice came out breathless, the air thickening between you. “About what you’re compensating for under all that spandex?”

Steve’s eyes darkened at that, a challenge sparking in his gaze. “You wanna bet on it?”

Your heart skipped a beat. “What, you gonna whip it out right here?” you fired back, trying to sound bold even as your pulse roared in your ears. “Should I go get a ruler?”

He gave a low chuckle, leaning back a bit but not breaking eye contact. “We both know I’d win. But hey, if you’re looking for proof—”

You didn’t let him finish. In a flash, you pushed him back against the shelf, lips crashing against his in a sudden, heated kiss. Steve responded instantly, his arms wrapping around your waist, pulling you against him as if you were the only thing grounding him.

The kiss was rough and desperate, all teeth and tongue and pent-up frustration. Your fingers tangled in his hair, nails scratching against his scalp as you bit down on his bottom lip, earning a low, hungry growl from Steve.

His hands roamed your body, sliding up your back, fingers grazing your bare skin, before one hand cupped the back of your neck, tilting your head to deepen the kiss. You felt his heart hammering against your chest, the heat of his body searing through you as his lips moved against yours, fierce and demanding.

You gasped as Steve’s mouth trailed down your jawline, his teeth grazing the sensitive spot just below your ear, sending a jolt of pleasure through you. Your head fell back against the shelf, eyes fluttering shut as he pressed hot, open-mouthed kisses along your throat, each one making your pulse race faster.

“Still think I’m compensating?” Steve’s voice was a low growl against your skin, his breath hot and ragged.

Your grip tightened in his hair, tugging just hard enough to make him groan. “Shut up, Rogers.”

Steve grinned against your lips, that damn infuriating smirk still there. “Make me.”

Before you could respond, the door suddenly creaked open, and you both tore apart, lips swollen, breaths coming in harsh pants.

Sam stood there, eyes wide. “Uh… sorry. Didn’t realize you two were, uh, busy.”

Your cheeks flushed as you scrambled to say something, anything. But Steve’s arm was still half around your waist, his shirt unbuttoned, your top askew, and he looked unbothered—more than that, he looked… amused.

“We were just—”

Sam held up a hand, backing away. “Yeah, no, no need to explain. I’ll… just—” He paused, shut the door halfway, opened it again just to shake his head. “You know what, figure it out yourselves. But hey, keep it PG-13, alright?”

And with that, he was gone.

You turned back to Steve, breath hitching as your gazes locked. A slow grin spread across his face, and you knew you were in trouble.

“So, where were we?” Steve asked, voice teasing, that familiar challenge lighting up his gaze.

“Oh, shut up.” You grabbed him by the open shirt, yanking him down until your lips crashed together in a heated, desperate kiss.

Who knew being stuck with Steve Rogers could be so… electrifying?

[the-winter-spider]

Invisible | Part 15

Pairings: Bucky x reader

Word Count: 5.3k

Warnings: unrequited love, angst, heartache...

A/N: A lot is said in this one lol not between bucky and her yet but you'll see lol. Also the flashbacks kinda tie into the chapters! The mike flashback will finish in the next chapter when her and bucky finally hash it out lmao

The city buzzed around you, but it all felt distant—like you were moving through a world that didn’t quite belong to you. Your feet carried you aimlessly, dodging crowds and cars, your mind swirling with everything you’d just said to Bucky. Everything he’d done. Everything you’d felt for so long but couldn’t say out loud until tonight.

Eventually, you found yourself in a quieter part of the city. The hum of traffic and voices softened, replaced by the rustle of leaves and the occasional bark of a distant dog. You spotted a park bench under a flickering streetlight and sank onto it, your body heavy, your heart even heavier.

You sat there for a while, trying to steady your breathing, focusing on the cool air filling your lungs. In and out. In and out. But no matter how hard you tried, the tears wouldn’t stop. You wiped at them furiously, frustrated at how raw and exposed you felt.

You just don’t understand. Your brain can’t even begin to piece together how Bucky could do this. How have you been hurting him? You’ve been nothing but a great friend—loving him from the sidelines for so long. And now, when you finally have a chance at something outside of him, he crushes it.

A dark thought creeps in, twisting the knife further. Maybe, deep down, Bucky never truly was your friend. Maybe he secretly resents you because you could never do to him what he’s done to you. Maybe he hates you for making him feel something he can’t figure out how to handle.

But then another realization crashes over you, colder than the first. Have you been doing this to Steve the whole time? All these years, if what Bucky said is true—if Steve really is in love with you—oh god. Have you been breaking his heart, too?

The thought hits you like a freight train, leaving you breathless. Steve. You’ve been so consumed by your feelings for Bucky, by the endless cycle of longing and heartbreak, that you never stopped to consider the weight of your own actions. If what Bucky said was true, if Steve really had been in love with you all these years…

Your chest tightens as you think back to every lingering glance, every reassuring touch, every moment when Steve was there, steady and unwavering. He had always been your rock, the one person who could ground you when everything else fell apart. How many times had you leaned on him, venting about Bucky, crying on his shoulder, seeking comfort without a second thought?

And all the while, he was—what? Silently pining for you? Loving you in a way you never noticed because you were too busy looking at someone else?

The guilt settles in your stomach like a lead weight. What have I done to him?

You run a hand through your hair, your fingers trembling. Have I been doing to Steve exactly what Bucky’s doing to me? Leading him on, even if unintentionally? Letting him love you while you poured all your love into someone else?

It’s too much. Your thoughts spiral, memories flashing like scenes from a movie. Steve’s quiet smiles, the way he always showed up when you needed him, the way he seemed to know you better than anyone else. How could you have been so blind?

But then your mind snaps back to Bucky. Bucky. The thought of him twists the knife in your chest all over again. His words, his actions—they’re like a tangled web, one you can’t seem to escape. You replay the fight in your head, the way his blue eyes burned with frustration, with something deeper and more vulnerable hidden beneath the surface.

He said you hurt him. That you hurt Steve. That you think you’re the only one who’s been in pain. How could he say that to you?

But the worst part is, he wasn’t entirely wrong. You’ve been so consumed by your own heartbreak, by the years of loving Bucky in silence, that maybe you didn’t see the ways you’ve hurt the people around you. Maybe you were so focused on surviving your own pain that you ignored theirs.

Your tears blur your vision as you stare at the empty park in front of you. What if Bucky’s right? What if you’ve been selfish this whole time? What if, despite everything, you’ve been blind to the way your actions ripple through the lives of the people you care about most?

You lean forward, elbows on your knees, and bury your face in your hands. The city feels impossibly big around you, like it could swallow you whole. The weight of your thoughts presses down on you, suffocating in its intensity.

But there’s one thought that refuses to let go: Why does it feel like everything you touch falls apart?

You’ve spent so many years loving Bucky, holding onto a hope that maybe, someday, he’d see you the way you see him. And now? Now you’re not even sure what any of it means anymore. The fight, the hurt, the years of unspoken feelings—they’re all crashing down around you, and you don’t know how to make sense of it.

And Steve. Sweet, dependable Steve. You think about the way he looked at you earlier, his eyes filled with something you now recognize as quiet resignation. How long has he been carrying that? How long has he been holding onto a love he knew you couldn’t return?

A fresh wave of tears threatens to spill over, but you blink them back, your hands clenching into fists. You’ve been selfish. Blind. And now it’s all unraveling.

The night stretches on, cold and unyielding, as you sit there, trying to piece together the shattered fragments of your relationships. You feel like a puzzle with missing pieces, and you’re not sure how to put yourself back together. Or if you even can.

You didn’t even flinch when someone sat beside you. You didn’t have to look to know who it was.

Because of course, it was Steve.

It was always Steve.

He didn’t say anything, just sat there, his broad frame a steady, comforting presence. You could feel his eyes on you, filled with quiet concern, but he didn’t push you to speak. He just waited.

After what felt like an eternity, you finally wiped at your cheeks one last time, sniffling softly as you turned to face him. The weight of everything Bucky had said still lingered, and the words tumbled out before you could stop them.

“Is it true?”

Steve’s brow furrowed slightly. “What?”

You held his gaze, searching his face for any sign of denial. But he only looked confused until you asked again, this time without words. Just a look, one that carried all the weight of Bucky’s earlier confession.

Steve’s face softened, his shoulders sagging slightly as he let out a quiet sigh. He didn’t look away, didn’t try to deflect or change the subject. He just nodded, his voice low and steady.

“Yes.”

The world seemed to tilt for a moment, your breath catching in your throat. You blinked at him, trying to process what that single word meant, what it changed.

“How long?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

Steve gave you a sad, almost apologetic smile. “Since high school,” he admitted. “Maybe even longer.”

Your heart ached, the weight of his words settling over you. “Why didn’t you ever say anything?”

Steve looked down at his hands, his fingers fidgeting slightly. “Because I saw how you looked at him. And as much as it hurt, I wasn’t going to stand in the way of that.” He paused, his voice softening further. “You’ve always been happiest when you’re with him.”

You stared at him, your chest tightening. All the moments you’d shared with Steve over the years—the lingering glances, the quiet support, the unwavering presence—it all made sense now. “Steve…”

He gave you a small, reassuring smile. “I’m not telling you this to make things harder. I just… I wanted you to know the truth. You deserve that much.”

The tears threatened to fall again, but you swallowed them back. “You’re such a good friend, Steve,” you whispered.

He nodded, his smile bittersweet. “Yeah. I’ll always be that, no matter what.”

The two of you sat in silence for a while longer, the weight of the conversation settling between you. But despite the heaviness, there was a sense of clarity—a new understanding of the bond you shared.

Steve sat quietly beside you, the weight of your conversation pressing heavily between you. The hum of the city seemed to fade away, leaving only the soft rustle of leaves and the distant chirp of crickets. After a long stretch of silence, he took a deep breath, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Can I ask you something?”

You turned your head slightly, meeting his cautious gaze. “Yeah, of course” you said softly.

Steve hesitated, his jaw tightening as if he was bracing himself. “Do you think… you could ever love me? More than a friend, I mean?”

The question hung in the air, heavy and loaded. You froze, your heart thudding painfully in your chest. It wasn’t unexpected, not after everything Bucky had said and the way Steve had just confessed his feelings. But hearing it out loud was different. It made it real.

For a moment, you didn’t answer, your mind racing. You thought back to all the times Steve had been there for you, all the quiet moments you’d shared, the safety and comfort he provided. You thought about how easy it would be to fall for him—to love someone as steady and kind as Steve.

And maybe… maybe you could have. Before the last couple of weeks, before everything with Bucky had come to a head. There was a time when things weren’t so complicated, and you might have let yourself feel more for Steve. But now?

Now your heart was a tangled mess of longing and pain, and you couldn’t see past Bucky.

You exhaled shakily, your voice breaking. “I don’t think I can,” you admitted, tears pricking at your eyes. “Not now. Maybe… maybe once, I could have. But everything’s different now.”

Steve’s face didn’t change much, but the way his shoulders sagged slightly told you he’d braced himself for this. “I see,” he said quietly, his voice steady but laced with sadness.

Your chest tightened painfully. “I’m sorry, Steve. You have no idea how much I wish I could. It would make everything so much easier.”

The tears you’d been holding back finally spilled over, and you buried your face in your hands. “You deserve so much better than this, better than me,” you choked out. “You deserve someone who can give you their whole heart.”

Steve reached out instinctively, his hand hovering near your shoulder. “Hey, don’t—”

But you pulled away, shaking your head. “Please don’t, Steve. I can’t let you do that,” you said, your voice trembling. “I can’t let you be the one to pick me up when I’m falling apart. Not like this.”

His hand dropped, and he swallowed hard, nodding slowly. “Okay,” he said, his voice low. “I get it.”

You both sat in silence again, the weight of unspoken words pressing down on you. Steve was always the one who stayed, the one who tried to make everything okay. But now, you’d drawn a line, and it felt like a small piece of your heart broke just from doing it.

“I’ll still be here,” he said finally, his voice soft but firm. “Whenever you’re ready, however you need me. That doesn’t change.”

You nodded, the tears still falling. “Thank you,” you whispered. “For everything. You’ve always been too good to me, i've never deserved this, i never deserved you”

Steve gave you a small, bittersweet smile, “You deserve the world” and you could see the depth of his love in his eyes. Even now, even when it hurt, he was still there. And that was what made it all so much harder.

Steve sat beside you, silent, the weight of your shared history and unspoken feelings hanging heavily in the cool night air. You’d both said so much, yet there was still an ache between you, a lingering sense that this moment wasn’t finished.

After a few moments, Steve reached into his jacket pocket, his hand hesitating before he pulled out a small, familiar object. The soft glow of the nearby street lights reflected off the delicate gold of the locket, the one you’d seen weeks ago at the farmers market, the one that reminded you so much of the one your mother gave you, and hers before that, the one you carelessly lost at that stupid party. He turned it over in his fingers for a moment, his expression unreadable, before holding it out to you.

Your breath hitched as you recognized it immediately. “Steve…”

He gave you a small, almost shy smile. “I’ve been holding onto this for a while,” he said softly. “I wasn’t sure when the right time would be, or if there even would be a right time.”

You stared at the locket, your heart twisting painfully. “You bought it?” you whispered, your voice trembling.

He nodded. “I saw how much it reminded you of what you loss, when i brought it home to exam in i opened it up” he paused opening it up and your heart stopped, your grandma's note “The lady said her daughter found it at some party and thought she could make some money at the market”

Steve’s words lingered in the cool night air as he handed the locket to you, his fingers brushing yours for just a second. The warmth of his touch, so brief yet grounding, contrasted sharply with the whirlwind of emotions surging through you.

You took the locket gingerly, your eyes wide, the gold chain glinting in the soft glow of the streetlights. Your fingers traced the familiar curves and edges as though to confirm it was real. You opened it carefully, your breath catching when you saw the tiny, worn note tucked inside—the same one your grandmother had written years ago. You traced the intricate design, your mind flashing back to the day you’d first seen it, the quiet hope you’d felt, and the weight of everything that had happened since.

Tears blurred your vision. “Steve… I can’t believe this.” Your voice wavered, thick with emotion. “You didnt even know if was the one i lost, i didnt even, why would you—”

He shrugged, his smile soft, tinged with the kind of quiet understanding that only Steve could give. “I saw the way you looked at it and even i knew it was the one you lost, i just figured it could help give you a little piece of what the original one meant to you. I got lucky, when i opened it and saw that" He's gestured to your great grandma's note, "I thought, maybe—just maybe—it was meant to find its way back to you.”

You shook your head, overwhelmed. “You didn’t have to do this,” you whispered, clutching the locket tightly. “I was so careless, and I thought I lost this forever.”

Steve leaned back slightly, his hands now resting on his knees as he looked at you with a mixture of tenderness and resolve. “You didn’t lose it forever,” he said gently. “It found its way back. Just like it was suppose to. I just… I wanted to make sure it did.”

You felt your chest tighten, the weight of everything—your fight with Bucky, your complicated feelings for Steve, the memories of your mother—all pressing down on you at once. “Steve…” you started, but your words faltered as you searched for the right thing to say, the gratitude and guilt tangling inside you.

He seemed to sense your struggle, his eyes softening even further. “It’s okay,” he said quietly. “You don’t have to say anything. I just… I wanted you to have it back.”

The silence that followed was heavy but not uncomfortable. It was the kind of silence that allowed you to think, to breathe, to feel. You closed the locket carefully, holding it against your chest. The cool metal pressed against your skin, a small but powerful reminder of everything you’d lost and found.

Steve’s voice broke the silence, low and full of emotion. “I know it’s not my place to fix things or to make things easier for you. But… I wanted you to know that I see you. I always have.”

“Steve,” you said again, your voice a broken whisper. “You’re… you’re too good.”

He shook his head, his eyes glistening. “No. I’m just someone who loves you, in whatever way you’ll let me.”

That broke you. A sob escaped your lips, and you covered your mouth, trying to hold yourself together. But the tears kept coming, and Steve just watched, his own eyes brimming with unshed emotion.

After a moment, you managed to look up at him, your voice barely audible. “I wish I could love you the way you deserve.”

Steve smiled gently, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “I know,” he said quietly. “And it’s okay.”

You held the locket to your chest, as if it could somehow steady the storm inside you. “You’ve always been there for me,” you whispered. “Always. And I’ve never deserved it.”

Steve reached out, gently brushing a tear from your cheek. “You don’t have to deserve love,” he said softly. “You just have to let yourself feel it.”

You both sat there for a while longer, the world around you blurring into the background. Finally, Steve stood, offering you a hand to help you up.

“Come on,” he said, his voice steady. “Let’s get you home.”

You nodded, slipping the locket around your neck, feeling its weight settle against your heart. It was a piece of him, a piece of everything you shared, and it would stay with you, no matter where life took you next.

As you walked beside him, the silence between you was full of understanding. It wasn’t the ending either of you had imagined, but it was a moment of truth, a quiet acknowledgment of what had always been there and what might never be.

Summer

The sun was high, casting its golden rays over the park as laughter echoed through the wide-open fields. It was one of those rare Saturdays where everyone’s schedules aligned, and the entire group had decided to spend the day outside.

Sam had commandeered the grill, expertly flipping burgers with a pair of tongs in one hand and a beer in the other. “I’m telling you, my secret seasoning is gonna blow your minds,” he bragged, tossing a wink over his shoulder.

Natasha smirked from her spot on a picnic blanket, her sunglasses perched on her nose. “Your secret seasoning better be more than just salt and pepper, Wilson,” she shot back, taking a sip from her drink.

Wanda giggled, her legs stretched out in front of her as she picked at a bag of chips. “Sam’s been talking about his ‘grilling skills’ all week. It better be good, or we’re ordering pizza.”

“You wound me,” Sam said dramatically, clutching his chest.

Steve stood nearby, setting up a game of cornhole with Bucky. “Alright, who’s teaming up?” Steve asked, holding up the bean bags. His eyes flicked to you for a second longer than necessary before he quickly looked away.

“I’m with Nat,” Wanda chimed in, grinning as she elbowed Natasha. “We’re unbeatable.”

Natasha nodded confidently. “Damn right we are.”

Steve turned to you and Bucky. “Guess it’s us versus you two.”

You raised an eyebrow at Bucky, who was leaning lazily against a tree, sipping from his bottle of beer. “Think you can keep up, Barnes?”

He smirked, pushing off the tree to stand beside you. “I think the real question is, can you?”

The game started off competitive, with Sam and Steve shouting exaggerated encouragement from the sidelines. “Aim for the hole, Buck!” Steve yelled, laughing when Bucky glared at him after missing.

“Oh, brilliant advice, Captain Obvious,” Bucky muttered, his cheeks tinged pink. He turned to you, leaning in. “You got this, right? Show ‘em how it’s done.”

You laughed, tossing your bean bag and landing a perfect shot. “Boom,” you said, giving Bucky a playful nudge. “That’s how it’s done.”

Bucky grinned, holding up his hand for a high five. “We make a good team,” he said, his voice softer, his blue eyes twinkling.

Natasha, ever observant, raised an eyebrow behind her sunglasses but said nothing, nudging Wanda when Bucky wasn’t looking.

By the time lunch rolled around, everyone was sprawled out on the blankets, full of Sam’s surprisingly good burgers and Wanda’s homemade cookies. Steve sat cross-legged next to you, while Bucky leaned back on his elbows on your other side.

Natasha watched the scene unfold, a small smile playing on her lips. She caught Steve stealing a glance at you when you weren’t looking, and her smile faltered slightly, her fingers toying with the edge of her cup. Wanda noticed and gave her a reassuring nudge, mouthing, You okay?

Natasha nodded, brushing it off. She wasn’t about to ruin the moment.

“Alright,” Sam said, clapping his hands together. “Who’s up for some frisbee?”

Steve stood immediately. “I’m in.”

“Same,” you said, hopping up and pulling Bucky along with you. “Come on, let’s see if you’ve still got it.”

Bucky groaned but let you drag him to his feet. “I’ll show you sweetheart.’”

Natasha and Wanda stayed behind on the blanket, content to watch as you all ran around like kids. Wanda sighed happily. “This is nice,” she said, leaning back on her hands. “Feels like we haven’t done this in forever.”

Natasha nodded, her eyes following Steve as he ran after the frisbee. “Yeah,” she murmured, her voice a little distant. “It’s perfect.”

Wanda glanced at her, her brow furrowing slightly. “You’re still not gonna tell him?”

Natasha shook her head, her lips pressing into a thin line. “It’s not the right time.”

Wanda sighed but didn’t push. Instead, she watched as Steve tossed the frisbee to you, his face lighting up when you caught it with ease, your laughter ringing out. Bucky cheered you on, his arm slinging around your shoulders for a brief moment, and Wanda couldn’t help but notice the way Steve’s smile faltered, just for a second.

Despite the complicated dynamics, the love and friendship within the group were undeniable. It was in the way Sam teased everyone mercilessly but was the first to help when needed. In the way Natasha always had a sarcastic quip but fiercely defended her friends. In the way Wanda’s quiet warmth balanced out everyone’s chaos. And in the way Steve and Bucky—despite everything—always had each other’s backs. And in the way you were the glue always keeping everything and everyone together.

The afternoon faded into a golden sunset, and as you all sat together, sharing stories and laughs, it felt like nothing could break the bond you all shared.

For now, at least.

The alley was dimly lit, the only light coming from a flickering streetlamp. Bucky stormed out of the bar, his jaw clenched, his fists tight at his sides. The cool night air did little to calm the fire raging inside him. He barely made it a block before he heard the familiar sound of heels clicking rapidly behind him.

“Bucky Barnes, stop right there!” Natasha’s voice was sharp, cutting through the noise of the city.

He barely had time to turn before she grabbed his arm and shoved him against the rough brick wall of the alley, her hands pressing firmly against his chest.

“What the hell, Nat?!” Bucky snapped, but she wasn’t having it.

“No, you don’t get to talk right now!” she shot back, her green eyes blazing. “I am so sick of this, Bucky! So sick of you and her dancing around each other like you’ve got all the time in the world!”

Bucky’s mouth opened, but Natasha cut him off with a furious glare.

“You love her,” she said, her voice trembling with a mix of anger and frustration. “You’ve always loved her. And she’s loved you since before any of us even knew what love was! But you’re both so goddamn stubborn, so scared, that you’re wasting your lives.”

“Natasha, you don’t—” Bucky tried, but she jabbed a finger into his chest, stopping him cold.

“Shut up, Bucky! Just shut up and listen for once!” She stepped back, running a hand through her hair. “We’re all in our mid-twenties now. We’re not kids anymore. You and her? You were supposed to set the tone for love. You were supposed to show the rest of us that it’s worth it, that it’s real. But instead, you’re both stuck in this endless loop of fear and self-sabotage.”

Bucky’s throat tightened, his eyes flickering with guilt. “Nat, it’s not that simple…”

“Bullshit!” she shouted, her voice echoing in the narrow alley. “It is that simple! You’re scared. You’ve always been scared. But guess what? So is she! And you know what else? You’re not just hurting yourselves—you’re hurting everyone around you.”

She took a shaky breath, her voice lowering but no less intense. “Steve’s been in love with her for years, and it’s killing him. And me?” She laughed bitterly. “I’ve been in love with Steve since high school, Bucky. But do you think he’ll even look at me the way he looks at her? No. Because he’s stuck, just like you.”

Bucky’s eyes widened in shock, but Natasha wasn’t done.

“I’ve been waiting, Bucky. Waiting for Steve to see me, to love me the way he loves her. But he can’t, because you and her keep dragging this out, making it impossible for any of us to move on! And god if i told her..”

Her voice cracked, and for the first time, her anger gave way to raw vulnerability. “I can’t do it anymore, Bucky. I can’t keep watching the two people I love most in the world destroy themselves and everyone else around them.”

Bucky looked down, his heart pounding. The weight of Natasha’s words hit him like a freight train. “Natasha, I…”

She stepped closer, her voice soft but firm. “You need to tell her, Bucky. Tell her you love her. Stop running, stop hiding, and stop making excuses. She deserves to be happy. You deserve to be happy. And if you can’t do it for yourselves, then do it for the rest of us, do it for me Bucky” she pleaded

Bucky swallowed hard, his hands clenching at his sides. “What if… what if I’m too late?”

Natasha sighed, her anger softening as she placed a hand on his shoulder. “Then at least you’ll know you tried. But you won’t be too late, Bucky. She’s been waiting for you her whole life.”

She pulled back, her eyes searching his. “But this? This has to end, tonight. Go to her. Fix this. And maybe, just maybe, the rest of us can start to heal too.”

Bucky nodded slowly, his chest tight. “I’ll try.”

“You’ll do more than try,” Natasha said firmly, stepping back and crossing her arms. “Now go. Before I change my mind and punch you again.”

Bucky gave her a small, appreciative nod before he opened his mouth “Does anyone else know?” He asked, referring to her confession about Steve.

Natasha smiled sadly and said “Wanda”

College

It was one of those golden autumn afternoons, the kind where the campus was bathed in soft, honeyed light, and the air carried the faintest chill. You sat cross-legged on the quad, a pile of books spread out in front of you. The vibrant reds and oranges of the trees framed you like a painting, the wind occasionally tugging at your hair and making it dance in the sunlight.

Steve watched from a distance, leaning against a tree with a sketchbook balanced on his lap. His pencil hovered over the page, but he hadn’t drawn a single line in minutes. Instead, his eyes were fixed on you.

You were laughing, your head thrown back as Bucky said something undoubtedly ridiculous. Steve couldn’t hear the words, but he didn’t need to. He could see the way your eyes lit up, how you leaned in closer to Bucky as if the rest of the world had melted away. The way Bucky looked at you—grinning, but with an ease that Steve envied—made Steve’s chest tighten.

“You’re staring again,” Natasha’s voice broke through his thoughts, jolting him back to reality. She plopped down beside him, her sharp gaze cutting right through his defenses. “Not a good look, Rogers.”

Steve sighed, lowering his pencil. “I’m just—”

“Sketching,” she interrupted, raising an eyebrow. “Sure.”

He didn’t argue. There was no point. Natasha had known for a long time—probably since the day the three of you met her. She was good at reading people, and Steve was an open book when it came to you.

“She doesn’t see it, you know,” Natasha said after a beat, her tone softer now.

Steve glanced at her, his jaw tightening. “Doesn’t see what?”

Natasha gave him a look, one that said she wasn’t going to let him play dumb. “You. The way you look at her like she’s the only thing that matters.”

Steve let out a dry laugh, shaking his head. “Doesn’t matter, does it? She only has eyes for Bucky.”

Natasha sighed, leaning back on her hands. “And Bucky… Bucky’s too blind to realize what he’s got right in front of him.”

Steve’s eyes flicked back to you. You had your hand on Bucky’s arm now, laughing at whatever joke he’d just made. Bucky, for his part, seemed blissfully unaware of the way your touch lingered just a second too long, the way your eyes softened when they met his.

Steve felt a pang of something between longing and resignation. “I just want her to be happy.”

“And what about your happiness?” Natasha asked, her voice low.

Steve didn’t answer. Instead, he flipped the page of his sketchbook, finally putting pencil to paper. He didn’t need to look up to draw you; your image was already burned into his memory. Every line of your face, every curve of your smile, every glint in your eyes.

“Maybe some people aren’t meant to have that kind of happiness,” he said quietly, more to himself than to Natasha.

Natasha sighed, her expression softening. She reached out, giving his arm a light squeeze. “You’re a good guy, Steve. But you deserve more than being someone’s second choice.”

Steve didn’t respond, his focus locked on the sketch forming beneath his hand. But deep down, he knew she was right. He deserved more. He just wasn’t sure he could ever want anyone else the way he wanted you.

Natasha’s gaze lingered on Steve for a moment longer, her hand still resting on his arm. Her heart ached, not just for him, but for herself. She’d seen the way Steve looked at you for years, and every time, it chipped away at the small sliver of hope she held onto. Steve was kind, strong, and everything she wanted, but his heart belonged to you. It always had.

“Steve,” she said softly, almost hesitant. When he didn’t respond, she pulled her hand back, folding her arms across her chest as she leaned against the tree beside him. “You deserve someone who sees you.”

Steve’s pencil paused, his hand hovering over the sketch. He glanced at her, and for a brief moment, something unspoken passed between them. But then his gaze shifted back to you, and Natasha felt her chest tighten.

The sound of your laugh carried across the quad again, pulling both their attention back to you. You looked so radiant, so alive, and so hopelessly, irretrievably in love with Bucky.

And Steve? Steve would keep loving you silently, from the sidelines, even if it tore him apart.

Natasha swallowed the lump in her throat, forcing a small smile. She’d keep loving Steve the same way, even if he never looked at her the way he looked at you.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Code of Conduct 4

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such as cheating, noncon/dubcon, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: your boss has a difficult time keeping his personal life from bleeding into his work. 

Characters: Steve Rogers, this reader is known as Rosie.

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself💜

💼Part of the Bad Bosses AU💼

“Are you sure you want to keep working?” You ask Mr. Rogers as you bring in the printed report he requested. 

“Yeah, can’t really go home...” he mutters as he takes the report with a brittle smile. 

“I guess, but you could... take some time for yourself. I can call your one o’clock,” you offer. 

“Rosie, you’re wonderful. But I need the distraction.” 

“Okay, I—can I get you anything? A tea? When I feel down, I have this lavender chamomile in my desk that helps me feel better.” 

He looks at you, his blue eyes sparkling. You really can’t handle him crying. His eyes are already pink and puffy from the tears he hid in his closed office. 

“You’re so sweet,” he sniffs. 

“Look that over and I’ll steep the tea,” you insist. 

You leave him before your ingrained sympathy can have you joining his pity party. You feel awful for him but lost too. You’re not sure how to handle all this. Relationships have always been a bit of a mystery to you. You have lot of friends but never found anyone to be more than. 

You take your time in the break room. You smell like vinaigrette. It’s another reminder of the chaotic morning. The kettle pops and you pour the water over the tea bag. You bob it up and down with the string and make your way back to Mr. Roger’s office. 

He thanks you as you set it down and warn him it’s hot. He runs his thumb up and down the edge of a page then looks up at you.  

“Anything else, sir?” 

“You... you said you feel down sometimes?” He asks. 

“Oh, well, yeah, but everyone does.” 

“But... about what? Why would you feel down?” He lowers the stapled papers onto the desk. 

“Just... things, sir. Nothing big. It’s just the way people are.” 

“You-- you have everything, Rosie. You’re so bright and bubbly. What could make you sad?” He pivots his chair towards you. “Who do I gotta give a talking to around here?” 

“No one, sir. Really. I guess I just need a pick-me-up from time to time.” 

He nods and looks down. You hover on the other side of his desk. You should get back to work but you don’t know if you should leave him. 

“I get lonely too.” He lifts his chin up. “Even when Peggy’s right next to me. I get it.” 

“Sir?” 

“You said you’re not married, right? I—I'm sorry if I assumed--” he cringes. “Wow, I’m so embarrassing.” 

“It’s... it’s fine. I have friends and we have lots of fun. My friend Missie, she’s really cool. She lies to tie-dye. We do that sometimes. And you,” you perk up, “you have Mr. Barnes, right? He told me that you twohave known each other forever.” 

“He told you that?” Rogers tilts his head. 

“Well, sure, he’s a bit chatty when he stops by.” 

“He is?” A brow arches curiously and ripples his forehead. “I shouldn’t be surprised. You’re so easy to talk to. Even with someone like him.” 

“Erm, I guess. I just try to see the positive. You know. Um, I don’t mean to presume because I can’t begin to know but I know Peggy loves you. And you have a good job and you can fix this, Mr. Rogers. You could try counselling or I don’t know. Like I said, I don’t know much,” you shrug. 

“We did counselling,” he picks up the mug and blows the steam away, inhaling the scent. “She stormed out of that too. We’ve tried a lot of things. A second honeymoon, a vow renewal, everything.” He looks down and his shoulders slump. He looks tiny even though he’s a big man. 

“I’m sorry, sir, I didn’t mean to overstep.” 

“You didn’t,” he inhales and pushes his shoulders straight. “You’re right, I can do something. I can put myself first. I think... I think I need to look into leaving.” 

You blink. You’re speechless. It feels like too much. Not his suggestion, just that he’s saying it to you. You’re fine getting him coffee and sorting his schedule but you haven’t been trained for this. 

“You should do what’s best for you, sir.” 

He nods and tastes the tea. “It’s good, Rose,” He sets the cup down. “Thanks. You’re... you’re too good to me.” 

“It’s just tea. I’ll let you enjoy it in peace and I gotta get back to it.” You smile. “Let me know if you need anything else.” 

“Will do,” he utters glumly. 

You slowly turn away and stride out. You feel a tugging in your stomach. Like guilt. You feel bad leaving him like that. Yet, you don’t know what else you can do for him. Missie would know. She always knows how to make things better. Maybe you could ask her but it’s a long story. 

Hm. 

You take out your phone and open up the conversation. You giggle at the kitten pictures she sent you last night. It takes several attempts to get it right; ‘hey, Miss, what would you do for someone going through a break-up? Tryna do something nice. Thx <3’ 

You’re sure she’ll come up with something, even without all the details. You tuck your phone away and turn back to your screen. As you do, an email pings into Mr. Rogers’ inbox.  

You click on it and open the attachment. The legal letterhead has your blood cold. Before you can react, you hear Mr. Rogers exclaim.

Oh no, he’s already seen it. Divorce papers. 

[crappymixtape]

come a little closer

REQUEST → dear nonny, SUMMER BLURB PARTY ❝ 💬 prompt 58, “do i make you nervous?” where steve and reader are more acquaintances and have mutual friends? – tina invites you to a party while her parents are out of town, but aren’t you too old for this shit? and then you run into steve and, god you wished you’d said no • +18 ( a little king!steve, a little spice, a little frenemies and a little fluff • steve harrington x reader )

C O M E A L I T T L E C L O S E R 🎶 waiting for a girl like you, foreigner

This was easily the stupidest decision you’d ever made, telling Tina you’d come to her party and then actually showing up. Because you were too old for this shit. Because you’d been out of high school for a few years now and who partied like this anymore?

You shot Eddie and Robin a glare as they stood next to you snickering under their breaths. They’d dragged you along with everyone else to crowd down in the basement and wait outside a closet door to see if Tommy and Carol would ever come out.

Seven minutes in Heaven. The most asinine game of all time, but everyone was eating it up. It’d been well over seven minutes and you were tired of hanging out with a bunch of old high school acquaintances.

“I’m leaving,” you hissed at Eddie and he grabbed at your hand with ringed fingers.

“No, not yet,” came out in a whine, looking down at you with big, brown, puppy dog eyes.

“There is no way in hell I’m going in that closet.”

Eddie grinned, smile lines creasing his cheeks. “C’mon, it’s not that bad.”

“Eds, you need glasses. Look at this,” you waved an arm around at the potential candidates you’d have the ‘pleasure’ of sharing a small, dark, linen closet with.

A low chuckle rumbled in his chest. “The worst is already in there,” he teased, “’sides, Harrington’s here.”

Harrington.

“Don’t even think about it,” you muttered and he grinned even wider.

“What? He’s nice now. Saved my ass more than a few times,” Eddie protested and you rolled your eyes.

“Absolutely not.”

Steve Harrington and his stupid member’s only jacket and perfectly coiffed hair and million dollar smile, the one that could – apparently – bag any girl he wanted. It had boggled your mind when Robin told you she’d made a new friend, Steve Harrington, can you believe it?? No, you couldn’t. Since when did King Steve buddy up with band geeks? A few shifts at Scoops Ahoy and you were already playing second fiddle to some asshole jock.

Well, not today. You didn’t need this.

Shooting back the last of the whiskey sour in your cup you gave the handle of the door one last glance and shook your head – stupid – but when you moved to leave the crowd gave a whoop.

“Shit, Tommy!” “Carol, oh my god, how was it??” “Did you find heaven?” “Gross!”

Tommy emerged from the closet triumphant, pumping a fist in the air with Carol under his arm, cheeks flushed and a big grin on her face. Everyone was eating it up and the thought of having to go in there with someone, anyone, made your stomach flip over.

“Eds, I’m going–”

“No–Sweetheart, stay!” he begged, nudging Robin with his elbow, “Right, Robs?”

“Are you kidding? No, you can’t leave. This is just getting good! What, are you nervous or something? Oh my god, you are! What’re you nervous about? Is it cos Peter Townsend is here? He’s so not your type–”

“Robin,” you hissed, cheeks flushed as every pair of eyes in the room settled on you.

“Wha–oh,” Robin chuckled and pasted on a piss poor excuse for a smile.

“You can’t go now,” Carol purred from under Tommy’s arm, “You’re up next, hon.”

Fuck, fuck, fuck. This wasn’t happening.

“Sorry, I have to be up early tomorrow for work and–”

“It’s only seven minutes,” Tommy sneered, the grin on his mouth pulling up at the edges – a shark with blood in the water.

You couldn’t breathe, air sucked out of your lungs as your grasped at straws, trying to muster up another excuse. You desperately looked to Robin and Eddie for help, but they were too busy whispering and giggling at your expense and your cheeks burned.

“Fine,” you pushed, trying your best to sound unbothered, chin tipped up in defiance.

“That’s more like it,” Tommy said with a whoop, rubbing his hands together, “And while you were too busy arguing with tweedle dee and dum over there we all decided you’re in with Harrington.”

Your stomach lurched dangerously, queasy and full of dread.

“But, I thought you were supposed to spin–”

“Nah, we put it to a vote,” Carol cut you off picking at her nails, “Better not keep him waiting.”

Keep him waiting? Your eyes frantically searched the sea of faces staring at you, but Steve wasn’t among them. When your gaze finally settled on the closet you saw it was just barely cracked, a shadowy figure shifting in the inky black just beyond.

You thought you were going to be sick, but you weren’t about to be made into a wuss. Turning to Eddie you grabbed his beer and chugged it in one go, then finished off whatever was in Robin’s cup too, shit, easy sweetheart.

“You’re on the clock,” Tommy goaded as Carol took hold of your hand and tugged you toward the closet.

“Have fun,” she teased, voice sing-songy, shoving you through the door and shutting it behind you, plunging you into darkness.

❝ MAYBE I’M WRONG, WON’T YOU TELL ME IF I’M COMING ON TOO STRONG?

Your eyes strained against the black of the small room, your body all too aware of there being someone else in there with you. It made the air thick, too warm and too close and the booze swimming through your veins had you feeling on edge.

“Thought you were gonna stand me up.”

Steve’s voice broke the tension and you jumped at the sudden noise, pulse fluttering against your neck.

“You’re lucky I didn’t,” you cut back, trying to stick to your guns, but then he shifted a little closer, his breath warming over you cheek, and it melted whatever resolve you had left.

“Ouch,” he half-laughed, arm brushing yours as he rocked on his feet.

It was slow, but your eyes were adjusting, dense black shadows blurring into soft indigos and violets and Steve’s face swam into focus. Thick, dark lashes framing warm, hazel eyes, the strong slope of his jaw, moles chasing across his neck and cheeks and that dumb grin. The one he was giving you now.

"This is stupid,” you muttered and Steve laughed, tutting at you.

“You didn't have to come, you know,” he teased and you gifted him with a particularly bratty eye roll.

“Seemed like a good idea at the time,” you snarked and it pulled the corners of his mouth up into a tiny grin.

“At the time, huh? Not anymore?”

You scoffed, shook your head and folded your arms over your chest, but the words wouldn't come. Stuck in your throat at the way you could feel the warmth of Steve's chest lingering just a few inches away, the scent of his cologne making you dizzy, hazy at the edges and all of a sudden unsure.

Shifting on his feet, Steve's toes bumped into yours as he put a hand on the wall next to your ear and leaned a little closer.

“Do I make you nervous?” he asked, his voice notched a little lower, closer, closer, closer, and it made something in your belly twist.

“Nervous?” you huffed a weak laugh, “Keep your pants on, Harrington. I don’t even know you.”

“D'you want to?” Your breath caught in your throat as he crowded over you and lifted a hand to tuck your flyaways behind your ear. “You can obviously do whatever you want, but–” his tongue flicked out to chase along his lower lip and heat pooled in your belly at the thought of what he might taste like, “–aren’t you a little curious?”

“Curious?” you breathed, voice barely above a whisper and he nodded softly.

“Yeah, what it would be like.”

You’d been in classes him with since grade school, watched as he won everyone over for popularity in middle school and shot to the top of the social pyramid in high school all while you lingered down at the bottom with Eddie and Robin and Jonathan, but you couldn’t deny it. Of course you’d looked at him just a little too long, eyes stuck on the way his Levi’s hugged in all the right places, heart racing when he smiled at you from down the hall.

“To kiss you?” you asked and he hummed, a low rumble in his chest.

“Only if you want to,” came out strained, a strangled sound as he pushed the words from his lips and you found yourself arching into him.

“I–” you started, lashes fluttering atop your cheeks, “–I want to.”

And Steve wanted it too, hadn’t realized just how down bad he was for you. You in those jeans. You and the way you seemed immune to his charms. You and your confidence and fire and disregard for everything ‘cool’ or ‘trendy.’

“You sure?” he asked again, body tensing as your hips bumped into his, jaw ticking as he bit down on the heat swelling his chest.

“Kiss me,” you whispered and he felt himself unravel at the way your voice edged on needy, a little desperate, a little bossy and God – you were hot.

His free hand moved to rest on your waist, fingers pressing into the plush of your hip, breaths falling heavy between you as he leaned down, down, down to capture your bottom lip between his and it was like a rubber band snapping.

Years worth of tension pulling and stretching and straining as you both played it all off like nothing. Like you didn’t care. The thought of you being with each other like this a joke, but the only people you were fooling was yourselves.

Steve tugged at your bottom lip and it pulled a sound from your throat that put him in the palm of your hand — soft, pliable, yours. He dropped his hand from the wall to grab at your other hip and you teetered a little off balance, grabbing at his shoulders to steady yourself.

Your arms looped around his neck too easy then, like they’d been doing it for years, like they’d mapped the curve of his neck and muscles pulled taut across his back a thousand times. Pressing your tongue to the seam of his lips he opened to you and you licked into him, tasted spearmint, cheap beer, Steve, and you wanted more.

He slotted a knee between your thighs and you gasped, a lovely pretty sound he wished he could keep forever, keening for him as he pressed your back into the wall. Parted your lips with a pop and dragged messy, open-mouthed kissed down your neck, your collarbone, your shoulder–

“Harrington, is your watch broken? Jesus it’s been like ten min–”

“Shit,” Steve stumbled away from you into the shelves full of towels as Tommy yarded the closet door open, the sight of you two dropping his mouth into a little ‘o’. Hair messed, foreheads dewy with sweat, lips kiss-bitten and a hicky sucked to your neck.

“My bad, did you need another seven?” Tommy grinned.

Head leaned back against the shelves, Steve squeezed his eyes shut, chin tipped up as he pushed a heavy sigh from his lungs and all too aware of the way the crotch of his jeans was way too tight.

“Yeah, maybe,” Steve hissed, hands tangled in his hair and it made you laugh. A soft, little thing without any heat behind it, cheeks flushed and pink.

“It’s all good, Hagan,” came out easy, confidence swelling where Steve’s had deflated, “We can finish it in the car.”

And God, Steve would’ve made a mess of his pants right then and there if you hadn’t pulled him from the closet and up the stairs out to your bronco with a bench seat more than wide enough to fit two people on top of it, more than confident you wouldn’t need another seven minutes.

crappymixtape™ • steve harrington masterlist // stranger things masterlist ♥️ reblogs and comments keep me going, friends! ily! ♥️

[rinniereads123]

One-Shots

SOME OF THESE STORIES ARE MATURE! READ THE WARNINGS AND TAGS BEFORE YOU READ!

Last updated 12/13/2024

★ - personal favorites | masterlist | other recs

yours to hurt, yours to love - @purple-babygirl

They had a deal. She would surrender her control; he would take it. Love had no place in such a relationship, did it?

Come Find Me - @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky

You get left behind on a mission, and Bucky goes to save you.

★blurred lines - @ellemj

When choosing a female agent to send back in time to gain young Sergeant Barnes's trust, everyone's in agreement that it should be Sharon. Until Bucky, the man that you barely get along with, speaks up and lets everyone know that it could only be you.

Shared desires - @veltana

You and Bucky decide to explore something new with Steve.

The Push and the Pull - @delaber

There’s nothing Bucky wants more than to be with you - and for that reason alone, he has to break both your hearts.

Little Bookworm - @heytheredelulu

Your boyfriend can’t think of anything more adorable than watching you read. One night while you’re in the shower he picks up the book you left on the nightstand: “Haunting Adeline by H.D. Carlton” and thumbs through it, very quickly realizing just what kind of books his sweet little bookworm is really into.

Anywhere Away With You - @thevillainswhore

Old ghosts from your past threaten to disturb the peace you’ve made with your new life. Will temptation steer you away?

★The Ties That Bind Us - @thevillainswhore

Even though Bucky is your ex-husband, you still have to see him often because of your shared son. But the heated tension, the spark that is still very much alive after your divorce, finally reaches its peak when you come home from your date.

Warrior/Worrier - @delaber

After a mission gone awry, Bucky finds himself on your doorstep in the middle of the night.

Pink in the Night - @d0wnb4df0rf1cm3n

Some interesting rumours have been circling around about Bucky. Little do you know, it's kinda your fault.

Love Hurts - @urdepressedslut

You and Bucky get into a heated argument, things are said and done and now he won’t speak to you. You don’t think you can handle him ignoring your existence.

in losing grip, on sinking ships (you showed up just in time) - @mellowsaturns

When the Avengers pick up unusual activity, they realize that not all of Hydra was destroyed. One unidentifiable face sends the team into a frenzy but Bucky knows it. He could recognize those eyes anywhere.

I Hate You - @ellemj

After ending up on SHIELD's radar, you're moved into the tower against your will. Of course, you can't stand the one man that you have the most in common with.

One More Night - @marvelouslizzie

You and Bucky Barnes are fuck buddies for a while. The problem is you have feelings for him but you don't think he reciprocates and it just makes it impossible to continue your relationship. Little did you know how much he wants you and how hard he's trying to keep it casual.

The Things We Carry With Us - @pellucid-constellations

You were injured on a mission and didn’t tell anyone, leaving your already rocky relationship with Bucky crumbling. Was it really hate he harbored for you, or was it something else? 

Control - @bucky-bucket-barnes

John Walker makes the dire mistake of messing with Bucky’s girl. This misstep causes a major fight to break out between the two, ending in nothing but blood and rage.

I Can Save You This Time - @pellucid-constellations

It’s the 4th of July and you’ve never been more sick. Turns out you aren’t the only one in the compound that stayed home from the celebration.

Shaken Up - @jamesbuchananxsteviegrant

Steve and Bucky find their girl passed out.

Under Pressure - @banditthewriter

Y/N hides a nasty injury from the team until they know everybody is safe, and then they collapse. Bucky worries about Y/N.

Injuries - @flowinglocksofbuck

you get injured on a mission and Bucky freaks out

Wicked - @str-spangled-banner

You were injured during a mission two weeks ago and put to much pressure on your healing wounds, doing more damage than you thought possible. Bucky fears he will lose you.

Necessary Evil - @bucky-bucky-bucky-bucky

Y/N gets seriously injured and Bucky takes care of her.

fingers fantasy fulfilled - @purple-babygirl

If Bucky's doll wanted his metal fingers then that was exactly what she was going to get.

Lavender - @wkemeup

Not every nightmare is the same and Bucky doesn’t always wake up as the man you know. 

Give Me A Sign - @lostgirlmuseum

Bucky asks the universe for a reason to live. The universe delivers you.

Fulfilled Fantasy - @sergeantbarnessdoll

Y/N admits to Bucky that she wants to have a threesome so he has Natasha help fulfill her fantasy.

Hottest Night of Your Life - @bossbtch1

Bucky and Steve joined you for a night out at the club, but things took a dark turn when a stranger spiked your drink. Bucky and Steve were more than willing to "take care" of you.

Sharing is Caring - @sad-not-glad

Soft Dom! Steve x Sub! Bucky x Dom! reader

My Queen - @adrinktostopyourthirst

The post-battle energy rush needs a release. Suddenly, there's a willing soldier at your disposal.

all the apple cider and no more haunted houses - @witchywithwhiskey

you and bucky barnes have a love-hate relationship—you love him and you believe he hates you—but when your friends insist on going to the scariest haunted house attraction in the area, the experience ends up forcing your real feelings for each other out into light

my everything - @mrsbarnesblog

The last thing that Bucky ever expected to see was the love of his life from the past trapped in one of the Hydra bunkers in the cryofreeze chamber. Yet here he was almost two days later, staring at your still unconscious body through the window at the medical wing, imagining the horror and disgust on your face when you found out that he was no longer the innocent and happy boy you knew before.

you were mine just yesterday - @notafunkiller

It's been a while since your break up with Bucky happened, but you're still not over him. You try to move on, go out, and have fun with your friend, Steve, but you end up in the same bar you two went to often. It also just happens that Bucky is there too, with Natasha by his side. It doesn't take long for you two to end up getting into old habits.

[world-of-aus]

AHEM. GOOD EVENING! I hope you're alive because I'm not 🤤

I am not okay, but I was inspired...

Worth Every Penny

Pairing: Mob!Bucky x Reader

Warnings: HEA. Pinch of Insecurities, Fluff, a doting and loving Bucky Barnes.

You can feel his eyes on you as you adjust the lone button beneath his bowtie, your fingers smoothing over the fabric as you list the details of tonight's charity auction. 

“You’ll be called on after Steve, and please for the love of God don’t forget to smile.” you say as your eyes meet his. There’s a grin on his pink lips, “like that,” you point tapping the stubble skin of his cheek. His hand wraps around your wrist keeping you there, “as long as you promise to raise your number tonight, I’ll smile all you want me too.” 

You only half roll your eyes, pushing your tongue against your cheek to keep your own smile in check, “I will not be responsible for your father’s death James.” He laughs, hand finding your waist, fingers curling to pull you flush against his chest, “good thing you’ll be with Ma, you can wave that number of yours as much as you want, put it on my card even sweetheart.” 

“James.” 

The hand that held your wrist finds your cheek, his touch comforting as he searches your gaze, “sweetheart if I cared what my father thought I’d be his next in line, but I’m not, I’m running my own show, the way my father should have – and you and everyone else that matters knows that. So wave your number if you want to – or don’t because at the end of the night I’m coming home to you regardless of what anyone thinks, says, or does.” 

“B,” you murmur and he can’t help but to chuckle because he knows he’s got you now. He feels you melt into him, “stop thinking, can see those gears running, don’t care what anyone has to say tonight, just care about you.” 

He makes it so easy for you to forget the whole world, forget the two very ‘different’ worlds you came from, the ones certain individuals just loved to make so painfully obvious to you – to him. And between your internal scolding and Bucky’s constant reassurance you knew you shouldn’t care, nobody else mattered except the man that held you in his arms but you couldn’t help it, their whispered words stung. They all only saw you as the successful mob bosses  secretary. To many like him you weren’t his equal, weren’t worthy of his time except for making sure to keep track of his time. 

A knock on his office door pulls the two of your from the intimate moment, the two of you stepping away from one another. Sam’s voice calls for the two of you, “it’s time, we’ve got to head out now.” You smoothed him over one more time, Sam pushing the door open further, “remember,” you say running a hand over his cheek “smile.” 

Sam calls for you one more time now fully waiting for you by the open doorway arm waiting for yours. You turn to move over to him but Bucky’s hand stops you, “Ill always choose you, remember that.” You give him a smile, one the two of you know doesn’t quite reach your eyes. Bucky wont let you leave like that so he pulls you to him, his lips finding yours in an unexpected but reassuring kiss.  

He only hands you over to Sam when he knows he’s kissed you breathless, “Take care of her Sam,” he tells his best friend and right-hand. Sam nods looping your arm with his, “you know I will, cars out front, your ma and sister are waiting.”  

The two of you follow your boss, out of his office making sure he makes it out to the car, Winnie rolling the window down to coo over you, “you looks absolutely stunning in that dress!” “we’ll save you and Sam a seat,” Rebecca calls from next to her mom. 

Before he enters the car with his mom and sister Bucky turns to the two of you, “when you get there, the four of you stay together,” he turns to Sam, “don’t let either of them out of your sight.” 

“I’ve got it handled man, get out of here before you get there late and your dad blows a damn fuse.” You and Sam watch him get into the car, watching it pull out of the driveway shortly after before moving to your own vehicle. 

“You know George will blow a fuse tonight either way right?” you laugh as you buckle yourself in. Sam laughs as he puts the car into drive, “Seeing Bucky alone will have him popping a blood vessel, that man can’t stand to see his son succeed.” 

The gala is in full swing by the time you and Sam arrive, several well-known notorious families all coming together for one big event that benefits all. You recognize several faces that have come through Bucky's office as you walk arm in arm with Sam through the ballroom to where the tables are pressed along the corners.  

You greet the familiar faces kindly as you pass through the tables where Winnie and Becca wait for you, Winnie’s hand flagging the two of you down, your name being called through the air. Bucky’s mother makes niceties for the other watchful eyes in the room, encouraging you to join them, of course you and Sam can’t pass the offer up – it wouldn’t look right in the eyes of the other families watching on, you thank her sweetly as you take your seat, Sam taking the one next to you. 

You can feel his eyes on you as you talk with his mother, he's sitting a table away with his father. George Barnes had saw to it that his son’s seat was assigned at his table, ‘there is business to attend to, new heads for you to meet that have been placed at my table it’ll be good for you to build your name.’ had been his excuse. Though you know that hadn’t been the case if the brunette-haired woman sitting next to him, leaning much to closely for your liking had been any indication. George Barnes had been trying to set Bucky up with Dot since you started on as his son’s secretary.  Bucky had no interest then, and he had no interest now, his eyes always looking your way, to be fair you tried to keep it to a minimum how often you glanced his way. 

 “You should raise your number tonight when he goes up dear.” Your eyes find Winnie’s and there's a warm smile waiting on her lips, “I know that’s what my son would want, and I know that's what you want as well.” Your eyes find her hand that's still placed warmly over yours, “I know Ma, but I don’t want to cause him any trouble – not tonight - and knowing your ex-husband there will be hell to be had if I so much as raise a hand when your son’s name is announced.” Winnie scoffs, “that man has raised hell every day since Bucky chose to build his own name, a name not tarnished by his father, George isn’t used to not getting his way, he’s used to glaring people down and getting what he wants, when in all reality it was his son that was getting him what he wanted and now that he doesn't have that, well he’s not used to losing so he brings down people to get what he wants. And you my dear are unfortunately his biggest target because he’s seen how much Bucky cares for you, how much he loves you.” 

Your eyes flicker to hers drawing a laugh from woman you’ve come to love as your own over the years you’ve worked alongside Bucky. “Don’t tell me you don’t see it y/n, my boy is as smitten as ever, can hardly get him to come see me on his own anymore.” 

“That’s where I come in.’ Becca laughs from beside her mom, “and even then he has to make it a whole day for us girls just to make sure he’s close by – can’t risk anything happening to my girls.” Rebecca says doing her best impersonation of her brother. 

You laugh then recalling all the Sunday afternoons that turned into family outings because ‘why not? I love keeping my girls happy, and you never know Becs mom might want a new set of nails after breakfast.’ Winnie never did need a fresh set, but the Barnes women always indulged Bucky in his Sunday breakfast with his ma turned family outings if only to keep him happy, because he deserved it.  

“He really does love you,” Sam chimes in from next to you, his shoulder bumping yours softly, “though to be fair he was smitten the day you scolded his father in front of his men.” 

“I swear that’s the day I made an enemy of that man,” you chuckle your eyes moving towards the table where George Barnes sat. You find awaiting eyes and a kind smile from the man that holds your heart, you return his smile, “that was also the start of the rest of your life, Bucky’s offered you more than George ever could, and in turn you’ve given my son the means to be who he is now.” 

Your laugh is watery as you fan at your eyes, Winnie cooing over you as she pulls you into her side pressing her lips to the side of your head. Rebecca eventually squeezes in Sam throwing his arm the best he can over the three of you. Before you arrived you might have though twice about using the black card nestled in your clutch but now, now you’d do it proudly. A table over Bucky can’t help but to worry as his family circles you, your watery laugh meeting his ears as you assure the table your fine, he has half a mind to leave the table and get to you but then they’re announcing all candidates with their secretaries to the stage. 

Bucky stands watching his mother smoothe you over, he meets you halfway not taking you in his arm right away to search your face. He cups your cheek, the moment intimate eyes surely on the two of you, “are you okay?” 

You smile squeezing the hand that rests on your cheek, “perfect B, come on let’s get you to the stage.” 

He gives you his arm, guiding you through the tables towards the back of the stage, the announcer is talking about the purpose of tonight’s event while the heads of the houses stand in a bunch awaiting their names to be called. Bucky guides you to his friends, Steve’s the first to greet you, Natasha following as she squeezes you in a warm embrace. Then comes stark with Pepper, Odison with Jane, and lastly the newest name vision and Wanda. This was the family Bucky had created after stepping down from his father, and he had you to thank for it, Steve had been the first to rally at his side, but the others came because of you, because of the relationships you helped him build.  

The girls are cleaning up their men as they straighten them out, you turn to your favorite brunette smiling as you squeeze his shoulders. “You keep smiling like that for me, and I’ll smile up on that stage for you.” You laugh, “careful B, don’t want to make it too hard for us to outbid.” 

“Ma did say I was worth every penny.” 

You shake your head at him, fingers running over the lapel of his suit, “you really are B.” 

His lips part to speak but the announcer has begun to call names, “remember sweetheart I’m still yours at the end of the night.”  

“I know B.”  

You let him go moving over to the ladies before you all exit from behind the stage, each of you going back to your respective tables to watch the auction. Vision is the first to be called on stage and his bids alone start off the auction strong. You’re not surprised when Wandas card fly's up, determination set as she outbids every woman who even try's. She closes the bidding for a whopping 10,000, no one ever stood a chance. 

And so, it goes with Odison going on next, Tony following both men closing 5,000 above visions, their secretaries waving at their recognition. The nerves begin to flare when Steve is called upon, your table at the ready with your numbers, Natasha meets your eyes from three tables down, smirk on her face. Steve’s bids started strong with 1,000 being called by Natasha other women chirping in throughout the room, with your table occasionally bouncing in. You begin to sweat when he passes 15,000 the numbers slowly climbing up. Sam closes the bidding with 20,000 you barely stifle your laugh at the wink Steve sends him. 

Bucky’s name is called next, his presence taking over the stage your breath catching in your throat, his eyes scan the entire room but ultimately land on you. Winnie starts the bidding at 3,000 “nobody's taking my boy on a date.” It makes you laugh when Rebecca follows, tacking on another 1,000, Sam taking it up another 2,000 shortly after. Steve’s voice sounds in the room bringing his count up to 7,000. His bid continues to climb the women chirping in outbidded by the ones he loves most. Bucky’s inching on Steve when from the table right next to you Dolores raises her number, 25,000. George finds your eyes, smirk on is devious features, you look away. 

The announcer begins to call out ‘going once twi -” 

Your number goes up, ‘55,000’ you call, the room gasps Winnie laughing next you, squeezing you as she huddles close. The announcer doesn't think twice as he closes the bid for ‘55,000 to the highest bidder of the night, congratulations.’ 

Bucky’s grinning at you with love in his eyes as the announcer calls all winners to come backstage to meet and finalize a date. Aside from Sam who takes Natashas spot though she still follows the two of you, most of the secretaries are making their way behind the stage again. There is laughter in the air as Steve and Sam make dramatics of embracing each other intimately though you only have eyes for one person behind that stage. 

He closes the distance between the two of you, cradling your face in warm hands, “55,000, sweetheart,” he breathes, “my cheeks were already hurting just looking at you.” 

You pull him closer, “I did say you were worth every penny,” you grinned melting into his embrace as he captures your lips in a sweet kiss. 

He was worth every penny and more. 

[ladykailitha]

Can Anybody See Me?

I just finished this first part of my Eddie adopting Steve in his senior year after his fall from grace and wanted to put it up.

Tag list of 50 has now been filled. Any other requests for tagging will be denied. I’m sorry.

Edit: Also if you saw the title as something else? No, no you didn’t. And any reblogs you see with anyone instead of anybody are a figment of your imagination. (*thuds head on laptop* I have the title right on here...in my file *wails*)

*

“Mr Munson?” the teacher called.

Eddie’s head snapped to the front of the class from where it had been watching King Steve Harrington throwing up in the garbage can.

“When Mr Harrington is done spilling his guts, would you please take him to the nurse’s station?”

Eddie pointed at himself and mouthed the word “me?”

He looked around the classroom and was shocked to find that Steve’s friends were either trying not to look at him or were actually snickering.

The teacher sighed. “Yes. If you would please.”

“Yeah Munson,” someone called. “Freaks should stick together after all.”

Eddie made a note of who it was and vowed to never to sell to the asshole again. He stood up and walked to the back of the room. He knelt down next to Steve and put his hand on his back.

“Hey,” he murmured. “You okay?”

Steve looked up at him blearily. “Munson?”

Eddie looked up at the teacher. “Would it be okay if we take the bin with us? So we don’t disturb the rest of the class?”

The teacher nodded, looking relieved.

Eddie helped Steve to his feet and made sure the other boy had a good handle on the bin and gently walked him outside. The cool air of the hallway hit them like a truck. But Steve beside him sighed in relief.

Eddie finally got a good look at Steve’s face, blackened and bruised as it was. “Who did you in?”

Steve’s head lulled back like a rag doll. “Billy Hargrove.”

Eddie’s eyebrows went up and led Steve over to the wall next to the door. Steve slid to the floor, clutching the bin.

“Aren’t you two on the basketball team or whatever?” Eddie asked, moving to sit next to him.

“The king is dead, all hail the king,” Steve slurred.

Eddie scoffed. At least someone was getting something from their history class because it sure the hell wasn’t him.

“With the second concussion in two years, I’m off the team anyway,” Steve continued.

“Second?” Eddie asked, his eyes wide. “What the hell have you been doing man?”

Steve’s eyes focused momentarily. “Picking fights with boys that can kick my ass because they’re picking on kids that can’t defend themselves.”

“Actual kids?” Eddie asked his opinion of Billy dropping further than it already was.

“Does a thirteen year old still count as a kid?” Steve asked seriously.

Fuck.

“Yeah, yeah it does,” Eddie replied softly.

“I have this kid that I watch once and while,” Steve murmured, “actually I watch a half dozen, but anyway. Lucas Sinclair is really good at basketball and he tried out for the team. Billy decided to be a racist bastard about it. I clocked him and he laid me out. Literally.”

“Is that the reason for the...?” he waved at the bin and Steve’s face.

“Yup,” Steve said, closing his eyes. “Did you know that the nausea and dizziness of concussion can last longer than the actual concussion? Because I sure the hell didn’t.”

Eddie winced. “You up for the trek to the nurse’s office yet?”

Steve opened his eyes and looked over at the other boy. “I worry it’s the moving that’s making me puke.”

Eddie blinked and the cocked his head. “That’s a fair assessment, but you won’t know until you try.”

Steve nodded and then hissed. Eddie got his arm under him and gently lifted him to his feet.

Steve moaned.

“You good?” Eddie asked.

“Give me second,” Steve mumbled. He breathed heavily, trying to stop the world from spinning. “Okay. Yeah.”

Eddie moved them slowly through the halls to the nurse’s station. He didn’t throw up once which Eddie counted as a win.

“Messers Munson and Harrington,” the nurse greeted. “What causes you to darken my step today?”

Eddie grinned. “Nurse Ratchet, what a pleasure it is to see you again. I am here under orders to bring King Steve to you as he up chucked his lunch in math class.”

“It’s Nurse Kincade to you, Munson,” she bit out. “Put him on the table.”

Eddie steered Steve over to the table and looked him over. Steve was sweating from the exersion which considering he was in better shape than Eddie was that was a problem.

“Hey,” he whispered. “Do you want me to stay?”

Steve looked up at him and gulped. “Nah, man. You need to get back to class. You don’t want to be caught associating with me anyway.”

Eddie reared his head back. He was pretty sure that was his line. But he knew better than to argue. So he held up his hands and backed away slowly, listening to Steve explain to the nurse what had happened. Eddie grabbed the bin and cleaned it out before he returned to class. He had briefly thought to leave as a prank. But they would know it was him and he promised his Uncle Wayne that he wouldn’t get detention this year.

And while he also knew Uncle Wayne meant the school year, the year of 1984 was ending and he could at least last that long.

He got back to class and stood at the door. He really didn’t want to go in but class had fifteen minutes left and that was too long for him to wait. So with a heavy sigh he yanked open the door.

The teacher clocked him immediately. “You left Mr Harrington alone?”

Eddie threw up his hands again. “Dude wanted me to leave, I know better than to overstay my welcome.”

The teacher rolled his eyes. “And yet, here you are in my class for the second year in a row.”

Eddie grinned. “Aww, teach. That’s not overstaying my welcome, that’s tenacity.”

“This is algebra Mr Munson, not English,” he moaned. “Please take your seat.”

He could hear the snickering behind him, but he didn’t care. He thought about a boy who looked after kids that were barely teenagers and took beatings for them, to protect them. He thought about mismatched hazel eyes, one almost swollen shut. He thought about the inherent kindness of a beat down soul and wondered what made him kind in this cruel world.

*

Eddie spotted Steve at lunch, sitting by himself, pushing the food around on his tray. He was probably still feeling nauseous. He went to the vending machine and got ginger ale. As he passed by Steve, he looked at the bottle in his hand.

“Fuck,” he murmured. “I wanted a Coke. Hey, Harrington, you like ginger ale?”

Steve’s head snapped up in shock. “Uh, yeah. I’ve been known to like it on occasion.”

Eddie tossed it at him. “Here, you have it.”

He went and sat down by his friends. All three of them were juniors but he been friends with them since the talent show in middle school. They were in a band together called Corroded Coffin and they were pretty damn good if he thought so himself.

“What was that about, man?” Jeff asked.

Eddie turned to Jeff. He knew of all the boys at this table would understand why he threw Harrington a bone. He leaned in close so only his friends could hear.

“Harrington got his bell rung by Hargrove for protecting the Sinclair boy,” he whispered.

All three boys lifted their heads to look over at Steve who was sipping the ginger ale and starting to eat a little.

They hunched back into their circle.

“Looks like Hargrove got him good,” Gareth said. “What was the ginger ale for?”

“It’s good for nausea,” Eddie whispered. “He threw up in math class and I had to take him to the nurse’s station.”

“But I thought Carol and them were in that class, too,” Brian murmured.

Eddie shook his head. “They are, man. But Steve’s on the outs with the whole lot.”

Jeff frowned. “I didn’t think that Mr Harrington would have let his boy hang out with the Sinclairs.”

Eddie looked over at Steve and then back down to his friends. “I’m only telling you what he told me.”

His friends nodded. Whatever was going on, the Corroded Coffin boys were too far down the social ladder to be in the know.

Eddie looked over at the lonely boy one more time. Something didn’t feel right. Something else was going on, something darker. One didn’t simply go from the top of the social elite to less than the weirdos overnight for nothing. And Eddie was going to find out what.

Now with part 2 and part 3 part 4 part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9  Part 10 Part 11  Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21

[steddieas-shegoes]

Have some angst with

"Why can everyone else be forgiven for their past but me? Why do I have to be constantly reminded?"

Steve was tired.

More than just physically.

And it was getting worse the more time he spent with the kids.

As the world slowed, the chaos disappeared, they found some peace. And they all deserved that peace.

But with the peace, came some teasing, some joking.

And then with that came crossing the line.

Steve was used to jokes about his King Steve days, he was used to laughing them off and everyone moving on.

But today, Dustin was being relentless.

And everyone else was joining in, even Robin.

That hurt worse, somehow.

He’d worked hard to be better for years, apologized to anyone he ever hurt with his words or actions, with his ignorance of how bad Tommy may have really been to people like Robin, Eddie, and Nancy.

He reached his limit before they even had dinner.

“Why can everyone else be forgiven for their past but me? Why do I have to be constantly reminded?”

Everyone went quiet.

Steve stood from the couch and left the room, made his way to his bedroom so he could cool off.

He wasn’t going to apologize for asking, but he knew he needed to take a breather before he said something he did regret.

A knock on his bedroom door startled him; He hadn’t expected anyone to come looking for him, at least not this quickly.

He should’ve known Eddie would, though.

“Hey, sweetheart. Can I come in?”

“Mhm.”

Eddie sat with him in his bed, not talking, not touching, just waiting.

“I’m just tired of everyone still holding it over my head. If they can’t forgive me, then they should just say so and leave, ya know? I don’t think I can handle wondering if they’re always thinking of me like that.”

“Yeah. I get it, love. I’m sorry they keep bringing it up,” Eddie sighed. “Can I be honest about something?”

“Yeah.”

Steve braced himself, ready for Eddie to break his heart and admit he agreed with the kids.

“I think you were never that person and it hurts more because you know that’s the version of you that’s remembered most. Even when you were King Steve, you were just doing it to get by. We all do things just to get by.”

“Why is my thing the worst thing?”

“It’s not. The kids are wrong for what they’ve been saying. I know they’re sorry, but I sent them home. I think they need to think about it a bit more.”

“Oh.”

“What?”

“I just…wasn’t expecting you to do that. To protect me.”

Eddie kissed his forehead.

“Of course I did. I always will. Even when it’s against super normal little asshole kids instead of super not normal demon bats.”

“Good to know.”

[ronearoundblindly]

Time and Tines (2/3)

Reasons (see previous or series)

Steve Rogers x Villain!Reader

Summary: With the Winter Soldier on your side, Steve races against time to figure out why...and how to stop you.

Warnings for basically DARKFIC: talk of unspecified terminal illness, medical malpractice, gaslighting, revenge, gun violence, not overly graphic death but still death (not of Reader, Steve, or Bucky), and decidedly too-little editing. MINORS DNI. There's plenty for you to read on my Light Masterlist, but this isn't for you! WC 5242 (which is, yeah, way longer than it was supposed to be)

Steve will do anything to avoid a fire fight with the Winter Soldier. There are too many people involved now, and he has to approach this situation delicately from all angles.

Steve just does not understand yet.

After hours waiting with agents in the dark of Doctor Avani’s house, convinced you’ve ordered Bucky to come right over and kill the man with brute force, nothing happened. There was no sign of anyone. Steve has to try something else.

A small army protects Salvatore while he searches your apartment. If the key to activating his friend is here, he needs to find it, destroy that information, and get a handle on why this is happening.

“This can’t be right,” Steve mutters, pushing past Agent Palmer (who drove) for a better look. “It’s too clean.”

Your one-bedroom would pass a white-glove test.

There’s so little…everything. It’s a far cry from the chaos Steve woke to find in the police station. His head throbs at the memory. He forgot what it was like to have his bell good’n’rung.

“Supe says she’s been selling off furniture,” Palmer calls from the doorway, “but he thought it was replaced. Boxes kept coming.”

Steve inventories a mattress with no frame, half a dozen hanging garments, no shoes. What were you buying? Where did it all go?

The desktop is bare. You’ve taken any laptop with you, it seems. That’s a small comfort. You clearly planned contingencies for your attack andor escape; it’s fitting you had the foresight to hide your research on the Winter Soldier.

Steve is still scared, however, because he sat with Bucky many times, listening to horrible tales of being trapped in his own mind, powerless, isolated in the midst of everyone, unable to control thoughts much less actions.

This one’s gonna take a few more beers for the friends to contend with, but with any luck and quick work, they’ll get through without bloodshed. He and Bucky will decompress somewhere peaceful. It’ll be okay.

He hopes.

Steve scans the lone bookshelf. The most curious edition is a history book about WWII, a few flagged pages open to reveal passages about Bucky’s service record, an underline beneath the location where the sergeant fell from the train, and a mail receipt for an address on Forsythe Avenue keeping your page. That’s all.

It’s not even a unique read. The book isn’t any more specific than an average school text. No other notes are made in the margins, so Steve turns the book upside-down and shakes, hoping for something to fall out. He rips the other books from the shelf and shuffles their pages until a picture comes loose—a polaroid of three women.

You’re on the right, fuller faced but it’s you. On the back is scrawled “the girls” with hearts on either side.

The book is handwritten, no label on the cover or spine, only an embossed mandala design. Steve’s stomach drops, but he opens to the front flap.

Property of Faith Williams

He swallows roughly and closes it, unable to step over that line of privacy. At the moment, he needs evidence of where you could have taken Bucky, and slow-reading someone else’s diary won’t give him that.

Forsythe Avenue might, but that’s just one tiny piece of the puzzle. 

Steve checks a different unlabeled book, but it, too, doesn’t have your name inside, just a ‘Z’ fancifully drawn amidst doodles.

Damnit. This is no help.

“Palmer, you finding anything?”

“No, Cap. Bills all paid. Nothing under the mattress. No mention of Barnes on any papers in the drawers. Not even a Cyrillic symbol.”

No trace, just like how you two disappeared from surveillance.

Steve shuts his eyes, head still throbbing from how hard the Soldier landed a blow to knock him out.

The agent wanders through the tiny kitchen. “Fridge is empty. Doesn’t look like she intended to come back here…if…actually, it looks like she barely ate. No condiments, no spices, nothing.”

“How long has she rented here?”

“Over two years.”

Shit. This is a dead end.

“Keep looking,” Steve orders, but he takes the two journals and heads for the car, pulling up your thin file again. You don’t hold any clearances or a government footprint. You were let go of from your last job with a severance package. Nothing overly generous. No medical leave mentioned. Benefits, including health insurance, would be intact. Based on your appearance earlier versus you in the photo, Steve chews on a few wisps of theories, but it’s not solid proof. Without more, Steve has no leads.

“Friday, any connection to properties on Forsythe?”

He adjusts to get comfortable in the back seat of the SUV alone, firing up a view screen.

There’s a low, sad sound that means the AI found nothing in your records.

"For her or him?"

Womp womp, it comes again.

Steve lets out a tense breath, “Where are we with bank statements?”

“Authorizations just came back,” F.R.I.D.A.Y chirps.

“What about medical records?”

“That one’s a lot harder, Captain Rogers. We have to—“

“Just analyze the financials first,” Steve sighs. His head throbs again, and he knows he needs sleep. There’s no time though. If he could just get answers…

Protections exist, of course, for good reason, but Steve feels the frustration of any detective. He’s trying to find a bad guy, and by 'bad guy,' he means you, not the man you’ve taken, not the man you are certainly going to order to kill for you.

Steve rests his head on the chilly glass and pinches his eyes shut. He’ll take a minute, review the money trail, and then interview the doctor. It seems a miracle that man was able to go home to his wife and sleep, even with security inside the room, down every hall, surrounding the house…Steve wouldn’t do it; he can’t even keep his eyes closed long enough for the dry sting to subside.

How could he be so stupid?

You weren’t staring at him from across the room; you were watching your mark, waiting for an opening. Sadly, it occurs to Steve that if he’d just let you inject Avani, Bucky would be fine, here by his side, and safe.

You are the threat, not his friend, but that’s a hard distinction. If anyone else sees James Barnes—who is the stealth assassin Winter Soldier, as far as they know—they’ll shoot. No questions. Steve has to find him first. He has to get to you first.

Bucky is compromised, but Steve won’t let it come to that. Buck shouldn't do anything he doesn't want to do just because some enemy hijacked his mind and body.

“Feel better?” You twirl in the chair as soon as the motel bathroom door opens, steam billowing out.

Winter’s face is shadowed, pointed to the floor.

“Or…at least, okay? Here—“ you offer the seat next to you at the tiny table “—sit. Eat. Let me—I’ve got bandages for your knuckles.”

“Heals,” he grunts, sitting easily but with stiff posture, “fast.”

You let out a heavy breath, muttering, “makes one of us.”

The soldier reaches out for the file in front of you, but your hand pins it down.

“Uh-uh. Food first, and palm up here, please.” You wait for him to flip open the takeout container then blot antiseptic on the split skin. “Does that hurt?”

He shakes his head, focused on the meal before him.

Several months ago, an article was published about Bucky Barnes’ affinity for this one particular deli in Brooklyn, a third-generation shop. It listed his usual order.

You’ve made sure the bread isn’t soggy. You kept the spicy mustard on the side.

He makes a strange face, looking around for your portion.

“Not hungry,” you assure him, “I’m rarely hungry.” You secure the bandage like boxing wraps and spin the file around.

“Eat your food—” The command is soft, encouraging. “—while I tell you the story of how we ended up here.”

Buried in the file you’ve put in front of the Soldier is several lifetimes of horror. Maybe not everyone agrees with you, maybe not everyone cares, but that bastard Avani has to atone. For the next hour, you explain what’s expected of him, glancing every so often at the fancier hotel entrance across the street from your motel room.

It’s too early; you’d be very impressed if the Captain had followed those bread crumbs yet.

You planned so carefully for every obstacle. You anticipated so many setbacks. Men like Avani go down like great stone pyramids, not houses of cards, because their lives are built with safeties.  For him to fall, a thousand others have to be damaged, and each one of them will put up a fight to remain untarnished. That approach—the truth, and nothing but the truth—has gotten you nowhere. Diaries aren’t enough proof. The placebo effect is not a crime. Two women are worth far less than a functional, marketable drug.

Plus, they’re two dead women. The pyramid is now their tomb. Nothing ever changes.

No.

You alone cannot topple a pyramid. You’re too far gone. You’re just one person. For justice, you have to go straight to the top, to the man himself. One on one.

Well, one on one-plus-one. Your addition is the sharp-shooter who can get you the top, the target, Doctor Avani.

Winter’s mission is very simple, but he’s thorough, asking all the right questions, thinking of all the right options. You knew he would be perfect.

“Now,” you clap at the end of your story, rubbing boney hands together, “a rundown of my meds. Sound good?” You grab a zippered case from the foot of the motel bed. “Nothing complicated, but here—“ nudging out a syringe and one glass vial “—this is the emergency one. Use 10 milliliters of this if I pass out. Got it?”

The Soldier takes an enormous mouthful of his sandwich and nods, eyes flickering back to that single bed.

You smile sadly. “I…rarely sleep. I’m keeping watch for now. You’re safe. You’ll need the rest.”

He chews and adds more mustard before his last bite.

“Okay? Good.” Your smile fades, fatigue and restlessness swirling in your empty gut as you remove another medication. “Next is this one. Every four hours, twent—wait, no, I’m up to thirty CCs now…”

“Sir,” Steve grits out with far less patience than he intended, pinching the bridge of his nose as if it will stop the throbbing inside his head, “you realize I am trying to save your life?”

Dr. Avani purses his lips in annoyance. “And you realize I am required to keep my patients’ confidence, right?”

Yes, Steve thinks, he’s said that several times.

“Are they current or former patients?” Steve tries to clarify.

So far, Salvatore slipped up only once. When Steve showed him the photo from your apartment, the doctor muttered something about ‘Faith’ and ‘Ziva’ knowing each other, looking confused, then immediately shut down.

Steve has to switch tactics. He doesn’t have time for this.

“Ok. We found over a dozen hotel reservations made with your assailant’s credit card, so look at this list—” Steve taps the smart screen to lay out a map with the names highlighted “—and see if anything stands out.”

“What have this crazy woman’s travel plans to do with me?” Avani bites out, rattling the tea his wife hands him.

A tremor. Not unlike how your hands shook at the table last night. Steve wonders if yours was because you are ill or because you were lying to him.

“Darling, your blood pressure…”

Steve sighs sympathetically to Mrs. Avani. “Thank you, ma’am,” he whispers, taking the next cup and saucer and clearing his throat. “Doc, please. I’m just hoping you can narrow this down for me. We still have no motive.”

“Insanity. Jealousy, maybe!”

“Jealous of what? Do you know what she might want?”

No answer, but Avani chews his cheek, eyes wide, while staring northwest on the map of hotels. Steve files that away in his mind.

The doctor returns to sipping his tea. “Do you know what they call people obsessed with finding patterns in chaos?”

His wife drops the plate of biscuits unceremoniously down on the side table between the men’s chairs.

“Salvatore,” she snips with the same frustrated fatigue wrapped around Steve’s neck like an albatross, “behave.”

“No. None of these are familiar,” the doctor grunts.

Steve can’t accuse the man of lying unless he wants to risk an all-out breakdown in communication during this active threat, but he’s running out of options. He needs real information.

Usually Steve would have more respect for a man staying within the parameters of his vocation, but this is a unique and complicated situation. This is Bucky on the line. Steve’s had enough of secrets and red tape.

“Any idea why she’d mail something to Forsyth Avenue? Do you know anyone there?”

“Forsyth Avenue? No, I’ve never been in that area before, as far as I know.” Though Avani wrings his hands together, no indicates that’s a lie.

Wonderful. Steve’s never been this unsuccessful at gathering intel, and Avani’s status as the newly-appointed Avengers’ lead physician makes it tricky to push harder.

So Steve recommends Avani and his wife consider staying in a more secure location before he sets off to personally check the hotels in the northwest quadrant of the map.

He takes Agent Palmer, riding in the SUV while the two diaries sit in his lap, knowing now—as sure as he can be—that ‘Z’ is for Ziva, and she knew you and Faith Williams. Those are ‘the girls’ in the photo.

Without Ziva’s last name, he can’t do a general search, but there is a death certificate on file for Faith.

Three women. One confirmed dead. At least two ‘former’ patients of the doctor. All visibly ill in either the picture or in person. One mourning the loss of person(s) and out to kill the doctor.

The pit in his stomach grows. Something very bad is happening, yet while Steve has anything else to go on, he will not be reading another’s diary.

He can only hope that your medical records are finally available once the hotel searches are complete.

There’s even a possibility he’ll find Bucky at one of these. Maybe he won’t have to concern himself with the rest at all. Maybe he won’t have to think so hard about your motives for activating a Soviet sleeper agent.

Steve does think, however. He thinks hard enough to spiral as each reception desk is questioned, as all security footage is combed, as every building is cleared. He has to make some assumptions to make the pieces fit.

You believe Avani is responsible for your friends’ deaths—both of them, since when Steve interrogated you, you accepted his condolences—and believe their cause of death was whatever treatment Avani administered.

It’s sad, of course, but it happens everyday. Experimental treatments are just that. If you’re concerned about gross negligence, the doctor could easily be reported to the Medical Board. Considering the amount of research, forethought, and planning required, the Winter Soldier is one of the slowest possible solutions to your problem.

But…Bucky was just your contingency plan. You had an opportunity to kill Avani yourself, yet you still set other options in motion. You used a weapon theoretically deadly to only the doctor 

Steve still can’t understand, and it’s driving him nuts.

Finally, after the hotel reservations prove fruitless, Steve sees no other choice. He has to read the diaries.

He combs through the pages, growing nauseous as darker and darker layers of the situation reveal themselves, disturbed by everydetail except updates from the units on Forsyth Avenue or those stationed at the doctor’s house. Nothing is unfolding save the landscape in Steve’s mind.

He asks F.R.I.D.A.Y about the disease Faith and Ziva mention. He asks about the public records of the drug trial Avani lead and its results published just six months ago, after the last entries of the diaries. He notices the treatment was a huge success…for those not in the control group. Finally, he can’t continue.

His head pounds while his stomach churns.

In the early afternoon, Steve lays down to rest his eyes and reevaluate, but he’s met with only a blank  canvas and drifts to sleep instead.

He’s woken by a shrill ring of his phone.

“Yeah, Palmer, what’s—what? What do you mean he’s gone?” Steve jumps up, straps on his shield, and races to his bike. “The hell were you thinking letting him make a house call today? Where did agents—“

Steve’s foot slips right off bike for an instant.

“Avani led the driver to some suburban neighborhood. Forsythia Commons.”

It dawns of him just as the garage door squeals open.

Steve never showed Palmer the receipt. No one else saw the numbers to the address. Steve’s rattled brain finished the label with a street name he knew.

He was wrong.

Including battles in Germany way back in the day, he has rarely driven so recklessly, but Steve is nearly a half-hour behind now. He has to catch up.

Palmer tells him Avani went into the residence alone—for patient confidentiality—and after a while, agents couldn’t get an answer at the door. Upon forced entry, they found the woman who lived there bound to a chair with tape over her mouth and the doctor nowhere in sight.

Steve gets lucky.

On his way to exit the freeway, he notices a hole in the noise barrier wall past a slope of grass. He pulls over and asks Palmer what the backyard of the residence leads to, but Steve can hear the reverb of agent comms before anyone is visible through the brush.

“Friday, I need traffic camera footage from my location from thirty-five minutes ago. Were there any vehicles stopped on the side of the road?”

“Yes, Captain Rogers. A standard maintenance truck with the department’s logo shows up and leaves seven minutes later, based on ten second intervals.”

“The license plate, can you read it?”

“Quality insufficient.”

“The highway department, do they have any registered cars out here today?”

A long pause follows.

“Friday?” Steve barks.

“Negative, Captain. Inspection is slotted for the end of next week, not today.”

“Alright, follow that truck on the cameras. Tell me exactly where they went.”

He doesn’t bother to tell Palmer where he’s going because Steve doesn’t want them to know really. He needs a head start to find Bucky—to make sure it’s Bucky who is found and rescued, not the Soldier who is cornered and subdued.

The trail ends at a dilapidated office park near the river miles outside of the city. With his own, short fingernail, Steve peels away the Highway Department magnet slapped onto the white truck parked by one building.

Nobody else is in sight, and the truck cab is empty.

Across the nearest door is sun-shriveled lettering. “-alv—re Ava—, M.D” marks the third name in a list.

Steve doesn’t hesitate. He can’t. He walks right in, eyes adjusting to a cave-like darkness without electricity.

The voices are faint behind another set of double doors, but he hears them.

“I don’t owe you anything, bitch. I hope you die like they did.”

There’s a sharp slapping noise and someone spits loudly.

“Admit it. Admit what you did and you won’t die today.”

You don’t beg him to talk. You don’t plead with him. You sound weak but sure.

“Rot in hell,” Avani annunciates, and Steve flings himself through the doors, knowing what comes after such a taunt.

You give him every opportunity to come clean. He could save himself, but Avani refuses while the camera records behind you. He calls you names. He calls your friends worthless. He says they were ’whores,’ but you will still send him back to the correct authorities if he tells the truth.

He doesn’t, he won’t, and you’re honestly pleased this is how it ends.

You don’t have a choice really; you must honor Faith and Ziva somehow.

Instead of the truth, Avani curses you, though not much could be worse than your current fate, even with Winter standing a few feet away, his gun drawn.

You have readied the syringe in your unstable hand and lift it to the doctor’s throat when—crash—Captain America bursts in and scans the whole room.

“Don’t do it,” he tries plainly. “You don’t have to kill him.”

You’re impressed. That’s faster than you expected, but Steve is looking at his friend to stop, not you.

“Shoot him, you idiot,” the doctor snarls.

As if Winter thinks the order somehow applied to him, he turns toward an open palm and a raised shield.

“SHOOT HIM!”

Winter doesn’t move the gun away from you and Avani.

Steve steps closer. “Bucky,” he starts slowly, “I’m not going to do that. I’m not here to hurt you. No one has to die.”

You need to buy more time.

“Soldat, show him.”

Only then does Winter lower his pistol and reach into a pocket at his chest, revealing the tuning fork that controls his own mind. Doing this will forfeit your exit strategy, but you’ll accomplish you mission. Winter’s mission is now secondary.

Steve’s eyes flicker from the fork to you.

After a tense breath, you give the command, confident the soldier will obey, locking your focus on Steve.

“Fetch.”

Winter sprints to the other end of the room and explodes through a wall and then a window to the lawn banking the river.

Cap makes a choice, his sad blue eyes full of pity, and it’s then you realize he knows.

He read the diaries. He understands what Avani did.

Steve bolts after the Soldier.

The doctor shrieks for his Avenger to come back, to protect him from his earned fate, but the hollow thuds of a vibranium arm and a vibranium shield colliding hum through the hole in the building.

The sound of fighting continues as you return the syringe to Avani’s neck.

Enough. Enough excuses. Enough lies. Enough time has been wasted on this man already. Enough is enough.

The end is more peaceful than he deserves. It’s quick and not nearly as painful as it should be. There’s no time left for suffering.

Salvatore convulses after collapsing on the stained industrial carpet, foam gently dripping from his mouth, a symptom of his condition when mixed with a common resuscitative cocktail, one you have to take frequently, one that spiked Steve Rogers’ adrenaline and nothing more. It kills Avani. His heart nearly explodes in his chest.

If there was ever a human that medicine should fail…

You only know he’s susceptible because Ziva knew. Heart conditions and caring for them are the sort of thing one knows about a person they love.

Avani promised to marry her, to leave his wife, to be with her after the drug trial succeeded. He promised she’d live, but he told Ziva she was taking the real medicine, ensured she took the placebo, and then gaslit her until the day she died.

Ziva spent the rest of her life loving a man who would make her happy and healthy, but instead, Avani made her life as short as possible.

He was not even that kind to Faith.

In her own words, Faith wrote how dying scared her, how she begged the doctor for the actual medication, how she offered anything to get it. Avani accepted. Faith did whatever that bastard wanted for months, all the while told she was healing.

Relief never came.

Faith was bedridden when a package arrived for her—a diary willed to her by a friend she’d lost touch with once you three weren’t gathering in the same hospital suite for the old treatments. That’s when she put it together, but Ziva had passed two months prior. Faith lasted only four more days, just long enough to bequeath the two journals to you.

The victory doesn’t feel as euphoric as you expected. You thought somehow you’d know that Ziva and Faith were proud and at peace, but you’re just empty and tired.

You stare down at Adani’s body, unfazed, when the tuning fork slams against a dangling metal doorframe and Cap shuffles through the rubble.

He’s scraped and beaten which isn’t what you ever wanted, just a necessary evil to fight evil. He watches as Barnes walks in from the grass.

“It’s me, punk. You can put that thing down.”

Bucky doesn’t wait for Steve, snatching the prongs right from his hands and tucking it back in his jacket.

There’s a moment where they almost hug before Steve remembers the doctor and rushes to the man at your feet.

“Call for help! I'm starting CPR.”

Barnes simply holds your gaze.

More sad blue eyes. It brings you hope that he will complete his mission.

You step away from the others to make for a cleaner shot, nodding that it’s okay, breathing a rough but weak “please” for emphasis.

“Buck?” Steve looks up as Bucky points his gun at you again. “What are you doing? STOP. It’s over!”

“His mission was never to kill Avani,” you hiss, unable to take your eyes off the perfectly-centered muzzle directly in front of you. “He’s here to kill me.”

“The hell—“ Steve climbs to his feet “—why would you shoot her?”

“I’m not going to jail!”

“You know what they’ll do to her, Steve.”

Both men take one step closer.

“There has to be another way.”

“I did this because it’s the only—“

“—can understand doctors who taking advantage and manipulating their patients better than anyone—“

“Put the gun down!”

“Pull the trigger! It'll be—“

“—told me he could do better than me,” Bucky barks. “Doc said, to my face, that he could make a better me. He wanted to make soldiers, Steve. More soldiers. Avani didn’t give a shit about what was right.”

You jump in. “If you found the diaries, you know what he was capable of.”

“That’s not how this works. We don’t condemn a man from—“

This time you step toward Barnes. “Just do it. Shoot me now.”

Steve lunges to take your wrist in his hand, your limb comically thin and delicate beneath all his enhancements.

“She doesn’t deserve to rot while they sweep this under the rug,” Bucky adds, voice low and serious.

“This is for the best.” You look at Steve now, and something heartbreaking swims in those morose pools, something unspeakable.

His head shakes, dirty, sweaty hair falling in his face. “What if there’s another way?”

“I don’t want to be saved, Cap. Let me go.”

You offer one final, soft smile, and Steve moves just as Bucky pulls the trigger.

Steve completes his testimony before the panel opposite him. None of the questions are a surprise.

They’ve painted you as completely insane, demented, psychotic, and he can’t argue. What would he tell them? Yeah, but she had kind eyes, so, you know, remember her fondly? No, he can only remain quiet until he has something pertinent to add which is very little. Bucky had far more to offer, and he already spoke.

When Steve steps out of the counsel chambers, Maria Hill is waiting for him.

“Shame she ordered the Soldier to dispose of her body. Took the coward’s way out.”

“You make her sound like a rabid animal that had to be put down,” Steve grit out. 

“No, you’re right,” Hill admits, “but it was lucky she left the sound thing for—”

“Tuning fork,” he snaps, “which I destroyed. No one should have that. No one should even know about it.”

Buck does his best to calm Steve down with a heavy hand on his shoulder. “S’okay, pal. The interrogation footage has been wiped and unless someone with perfect pitch was walking by observation--”

“You know that’s not reassuring, right?”

The two huge men look at each other.

Steve finally mutters, “what about Avani’s widow?”

“All the blackmail sent to his mistress in Forsythia Commons was removed before Gloria even knew Sal was kidnapped, and I think it’s fair to say that lady is so grateful her name wasn’t dragged through the press that she won’t be bothering the wife. Good thing the doctor put her car and house in her name, or legally, this would get ugly.”

“Yes. We’re very lucky he was such a skilled adulterer,” Steve quips dryly. He regrets handing over the diaries for evidence. They weren’t mentioned once in any of the hearings.

Bucky flashes Steve a warning glare that reads, don’t start.

Hill obliviously flips through the folder in her hands, nodding. “All in all, this report amounts to an incredibly long lead-in of ‘use that PTO, boys!’ You earned it.”

“Understatement of the century…and I would know.” Bucky is a much better liar than Steve.

Thank god, they are fleeing to the middle of nowhere indefinitely.

Hill heads back to her office. “We’ll be here when you get back. Keep in touch.”

“No,” Steve counters. “I don’t think I will.”

Bucky and Steve leave in an old truck the next morning. They can’t seem rushed or impatient to get to their destination.

Casually accumulating supplies, Steve loads their bags in the flat bed with space for all repair materials they are likely to need. The cabin needs some work; the guys need to get their hands dirty and live simply for a while.

The team is happy for Steve; it’s been so long since anyone saw him moving forward in life, and, of course, he and Bucky deserve some peace and quiet.

No one else has any idea how hard-won this vacation is.

The drive takes all day because they can’t be in a hurry.

Steve takes pictures at every scenic outlook. Bucky climbs up onto some rock ledges to take selfies which Steve is not into. This earns him being featured as a blurry grump in the background of all of them, purposefully.

Eventually, the GPS-free truck pulls up to the place, a large A-frame style cabin that should be plenty big for two super soldiers.

Parked on the gravel path, Steve is careful not to ding the other car when he swings open his door. As Bucky heaves two duffels from the trunk, he calls out, “got the meds, too” and heads inside. Steve gathers up the remaining bags and trudges over, smelling something hearty and delicious cooking, listening to the tinkling, copper-coin wind chime hanging somewhere above him.

He doesn’t stop looking at his feet until they hit the top of the porch, spotting two smaller bare feet on the welcome mat.

There you are, holding the door open, layered in warm knits, more tired before but better than expected.

“Hey,” Steve breathes finally.

“Hey,” you say, your mouth twisted to hide an excited smile.

“Yes, hello,” Bucky grumbles from the living room. “Now shut the damn door. I’m hungry.”

Steve steps inside.

[Last Part]

[Main Masterlist; Ko-Fi]

a/n: Sorry this took so long a fucking year! Tags will be in a reblog.

[navybrat817]

🧚🏻‍♀️✨Bippity boppity bow chicka wow oww! You’ve been visited by the Shameless Hoe Fairy, and now you must pick one CE fictional babe and share a hoe thought including the prompts: midnight + soft!dark 😏 Go on and spread those shameless hoe vibes and your legs 😘❤️

Sis! I asked you with no context to choose between Steve and Ari. Hehe. Hope you like it.

When the Clock Strikes

Pairing: Soft Dark!Ari Levinson x Female Reader Summary: You wake up and realize you're not alone in your new place. Word Count: Over 1k Warnings: Implied smutty times, non-con/dubcon elements (you have been warned), creepy vibes, otherworldly, Ari Levinson (yep, he's a warning) A/N: Happy Sinday! ❤️ Beta read by the lovely @whisperlullaby, but any and all mistakes are my own. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

You weren’t sure why you awoke so suddenly, but you found yourself shivering as you sat up in your bed. You normally had no trouble sleeping through the night, though you couldn’t be sure it wasn’t morning or not thanks to your blackout curtains. Maybe it was a touch of anxiety since you were living in a new place, but you loved your new home. It also could’ve been because you were freezing.

And naked.

What the hell?

You covered your chest as you tried to see through the darkness of your room. The last thing you remembered coming home after having a couple of drinks with your friends. The warmth from the alcohol made you strip off most of your clothes before you collapsed on the silky sheets, but you were certain you kept your bra and underwear on. What happened to them? Where was your comforter?

With a tired sigh, you grabbed the sheet from the end of the bed and covered yourself up. You probably kicked the comforter away in your sleep. It still didn’t explain what happened to the rest of your clothes. Fear lit up in your chest like a flare at the thought of someone else taking them off, but you didn’t bring anyone home with you.

I didn’t have that much to drink.

Glancing at your nightstand, you felt around for your phone and tapped the screen. Midnight. “Just go back to sleep,” you muttered to yourself, fluffing your pillow and resting your head against it with a huff.

Silence filled the air as you shut your eyes.

They snapped open as the closet door handle turned a second later.

Oh, my god.

You lay frozen as something or someone slowly pushed the door open, the creaking noise making your heart palpitate. From what you could see, a tall, built man with the brightest blue eyes you’d ever soon stood in the middle of your closet. You shouldn’t have been able to make out his eye color from the lack of light, but they seemed to glow as he took a step toward you. No sound came out when you tried to scream.

Why can’t I move?

Though you didn’t see him move his hand or move any closer to the bed, he turned on the nearby lamp. Whether to get a better look at you or for you to see him, you weren’t sure. He had no shirt on, the dark hair on his chest matching his luscious locks and beard. His piercing gaze seemed to see right through you as you thought about how handsome he was. It wasn’t right to think that way, but fear was sometimes unexplainable.

He’s a stranger in my home. He was hiding in my closet. He-

“You’re much prettier than the last tenant,” the man spoke into the darkness, his voice rich and deep. “And all alone.”

You were still incapable of using your voice as you attempted to scramble away from him. You asked before signing the lease why you got the place so cheap, but you couldn’t recall the answer. Did he do something to the last person who lived here? Why didn’t you ask around more?

“Have I rendered you speechless, sweetheart?” he asked with an amused smile, gripping your ankle through the sheet. “We’ll need to change that.”

Your heart leapt to your throat when he tore the fabric away to reveal your naked body. “What do you want?” you finally asked, your voice no louder than a whisper.

The bed dipped under his weight as he crawled toward you. The mixture of light and shadows cast a sinister glow along his face as he smiled. “I want you to scream my name when I make you come.”

He cut off your whimper when his hand shot out to grip your throat. “Please,” you gasped.

“Ari. My name is Ari,” he told you, squeezing as he nudged your thighs apart. You didn’t know who he was. More accurately, what he was. “And I know you’ll take my cock like a good girl. I’ll wreck your cunt ‘til you beg for me to keep you.”

You arched your back, his touch everywhere though he didn’t move his hands. His fingers pinched your nipples, his tongue licked your folds, but he stayed still above you. It was otherworldly. It had to be a dream.

Or a nightmare.

“But you won’t have to beg much. I already plan to keep you,” he promised, brushing his thumb along your lips before he forced them open. “And I plan to ruin each of your holes. Your cunt, your ass, your mouth, they’re mine. You’re mine.”

You made a sound of protest around the digit in your mouth when you felt the head of his cock breach your tight hole. He hadn’t prepped you, but your body betrayed you by trying to suck more of him in. Why weren’t you fighting? Why did you want this?

“That’s it, sweetheart. Let your sweet cunt welcome me home where I belong,” he grunted.

I belong to you, Ari.

Before he sheathed you completely, you woke up with a gasp. You gulped as you felt along your body, your heart pounding in your chest as your eyes darted around your dark bedroom. A nervous giggle escaped when you realized you were all alone. No one was in your room and you were okay. A strange man wasn’t about to take advantage of you. It was just a dream.

A vivid, erotic dream.

“Maybe I did drink too much,” you said, reaching for your phone on the nightstand. You frowned when you saw the time.

11:59pm

“What?” you whispered, gripping the device when you watched the time change to 12:00am.

Midnight.

The scared giggled came out again as you set your phone down. “It was just a dream,” you said, your gaze flickering to the closet door where it remained shut.

Just a dream.

That’s what you told yourself when the door handle turned.

Could be a fun world to explore with these two! Love and thanks for reading. ❤️

[holylulusworld]

Indecent Proposal (24.2)

Summary: Your boyfriend wants to be part of their empire. You are the pawn he’s willing to sacrifice.

Pairing: Mobster!Stucky x fem!Reader

Warnings: established Stucky, caring mobsters, pregnant reader, polyamory, fluff, mentions of character's death

A/N: This is an interlude chapter.

Indecent Proposal (24)

Indecent Proposal masterlist

Now, the mansion…

“You promised to make things up to me,” you pout and give Steve the stinky eye. “Talk is cheap. I want your cocks.”

You wanted to go down and dirty, but Steve and Bucky wished to talk to you first. Now you’re sitting in the armchair at the library, Alpine in your lap, looking like a villain in a movie while patting the cat.

“You will have to make a lot up to me and Alpine,” you hold Bucky’s gaze. “You worried the poor cat. I had to brush their fur and give them a new necklace to calm the Alpine.”

Steve grins at your serious expression. “Doll, we are sorry about worrying you. And I will give you everything you want tomorrow. For tonight, we need to talk about a few things. We promised you to tell you everything.”

“We want nothing more than to ruin you all over again,” Bucky smirks when you start to squirm in your seat. “Steve is right, though. We need to talk about a few things, and after, we need a rest. It was a fucking long week.”

“You’re not hurt, right?” You look Bucky up and down before turning your head toward Steve. “Right? Everyone came home safely. All of your men too.”

“No one got hurt, doll,” Bucky assures you. “Our men know how to handle any situation. Jake localized Brock’s hideout, and we stormed the house. Not a big deal.”

You listen closely, hoping Bucky is telling you the truth. He gives you a soft smile and runs his hand over your head, but you won’t let him distract you this time.

“Is that the truth? We didn’t lose anyone. They are all safe,” you press on. “You won’t lie to me.”

“We swear, no one got hurt but the bastard trying to hurt you and our babies,” Steve softly says. He cups your face to press a kiss on your forehead. “They are having food at the moment. M’Baku was hungry.”

You giggle. M’Baku seems to be always hungry. Ever so often, you made a sandwich for the tall guy too when you sneaked into the kitchen for your nightly cravings.

He’s a giant, but a friendly one. M’Baku told you about his family and the woman he wants to marry. For a member of the mafia, he’s pretty nice.

You sigh, relieved. No one got hurt, everyone came back alive. The danger is over. – For now. You never know. In your husband's line of business, you’ll never not be in danger. They have enemies lurking in the dark, waiting for their chance to get back at Steve and Bucky.

“I want to know it all,” you say. “No more secrets, Steve, Bucky. Please fill me in. I need to know.”

“We killed Rumlow and disposed of his body,” Bucky hastily says. He hopes you do not hate him for killing another man in your name. “He died faster than he deserved.”

“He won’t cause trouble ever again,” Steve clears his throat. He can see the worry in your eyes and tries to assure you no one will ever find out Bucky killed Brock. “Natasha helped cover his death. We made it look like he left town because Natasha found out that he was a corrupt cop. Jake was a big help. Remind me to never mess with Jake Jensen.”

“Jakie is a sweetheart,” you coo. “He distracted me with zombies and explained to me how he hacks into a system.”

“Zombies?” Bucky grunts. “He showed you zombies. Is that a code word for his dick?” He cocks a brow. “Doll, answer me.”

“No, dummy,” you giggle and snort. “He designed a video game. There are zombies, and guns…and stuff. It’s pretty cool. Jake is a smart guy. You should pay him more.”

Steve laughs at his husband’s pissed expression. He can’t bear sharing your attention with someone else but Steve. Bucky hums and plans on having a serious conversation with Jake in the morning.

“Don’t put, Bucky baby,” you hold out your hand for Bucky. “You know I already got my hands full with you and Stevie. I cannot handle another man. Jake is only a nice guy helping not to worry about you.”

“Fine,” Bucky still pouts, but promises you to not hurt Jake.

“How about we forget about Brock and everything else for tonight and,” you smirk at Steve, “in the morning, you can make things up to me…”

Part 25

Tags in reblog.

[thetorturedbuckydepartment]

chapter five: fucking situations, circumstances, miscommunications

pairing: Bucky barnes x plus-sized!reader

summary: Six months ago, you were appointed to be Head Nurse to the Avengers by Tony Stark. Every day, you count your lucky stars, knowing the horrible past you quickly ditched back in England. It holds you back, restrains you, from getting close to anyone when on your new job.

That's until you met and fell in love with Bucky Barnes. The supposed assassin with a heart of gold, who seems to be eager to get to know you. To peel back your layers piece by piece, but could you trust him once you're laid before him raw and vulnerable?

masterlist

PREVIOUS PART -- CHAPTER FOUR: WHO ELSE DECODES YOU?

warnings: language, mentions of sex (no smut), self deprecation, angst (!)

word count: 3.9k

Taglist: @scott-loki-barnes @cjand10 @blackwidownat2814 @blackbirdwitch22 @laughterafter  @blackhawkfanatic @mcira @bxckybxrnes24 @rachellovesloki @toffeacademia @bean-bean2000 @lana525 @selella

A/N: im so sorry okay? but I promise, the fruits of patience are always sweet (is that right)! hope u enjoy, and don't worry only five more chapters until I stop torturing the pair to pine longingly... also phase one is complete, so I'll be taking a two week break before starting phase two: the falling rollout! stay tuned :)

It turns out you were wrong. You had been speaking to Nat — Wanda was off somewhere with Vision — and you talked her out of the notion that you were falling in love with Bucky. Because of course you aren’t…you can’t afford to. Falling in love made a mess of you, there’s no way it’s going to happen so soon.

When you first set foot in New York, it felt like a fresh start. Sure, you’d imagine if all went well, then a few years down the line you’d find yourself opening up again. Not doing it so soon, and certainly hadn’t imagined in your wildest dreams that it would be reciprocated.

You convince yourself you’ve imagined it. And of course, you did. Because in the night, Bucky had left you and your scheduled movie night last minute, to go out on the town with Steve. He had invited you, but you’d declined. Maybe you’ve weirded him out with admitting you’re more attracted to brunettes — maybe he’s figured it all out and is now trying to avoid you, to let you down gently. 

And when you’re just about to fall asleep after tormenting yourself with all the awkward ways he’s trying to avoid you, because he’s too nice to tell you — that’s when you hear it. Moaning and groaning of a man and woman through the wall, the hard and rough pounding of what can only be a bed frame against a surface, and the man is undoubtedly Bucky. You'd recognise his voice anywhere. Your heart sinks as you immediately walk out of your room, where you can hear everything, heading to the kitchen, unable to handle it. It feels like your insides will be spilled all over your front and the floor. Trying to get the images out of your mind of Bucky and another woman entangled…like that. Clutching at your chest, because your heart just burns and your eyes are full of water and everything’s blurry, shaky hands reaching for a glass of cold water to dissolve the lump in your throat.

Why are you upset? Bucky is a grown man, fully capable of making his own decisions and choosing the women he wants to sleep with. It’s not his fault he doesn’t choose you. So why does it make you so upset, that you’re quietly stifling your sobs in an empty, cold kitchen?

You feel like your heart has been ripped out — once again doomed to be romantically interested in the one who would rather choose an inanimate rock over you. Well, maybe that’s an exaggeration, but still. You don’t know how long you stand there, the only light a warm orange spilling over the black kitchen island, and think every single spark of hope in you away. The look of desire on his face…maybe it was platonic affection. You mistook it for something more, because you’ve never seen that look haunt anyone's features before. Maybe he looks like that at everyone.

And then you hear hurried footsteps, and the unmistakeable, juggernaut-like clack of women’s heels. You straighten, and she appears. Wrapped in a red dress, Bucky’s favourite shade, that accentuates every part of her so flawlessly, and her lipstick hasn’t even budged, despite the mess of her hair and other parts of her makeup. She offers you a soft smile as she passes, but you can’t help yourself. How has her lipstick not even smudged a little?

“Wow, you’re so pretty, oh my God. What lipstick do you use, and how the hell has it still not budged? Girl, I need the brand and name, like, right now.” You usher her over, to inspect her perfect lips more closely. Even the warm light makes her seem a million times more attractive, and you can’t help yourself.

You hold her face in your hands while she rattles off some obscure brand you’ve never heard of, making a mental note to search it up later. “It looks amazing,” you say, meeting her eyes, which are the most warm shade of brown. 

You know you can never hold a candle to the beauty of this woman, even at your very best, but you’d be damned if you didn’t tell her of her radiance.

“Thank you,” she blushes and straightens, pulling away from your hold. Her outfit is so amazing, you can’t even blame Bucky for being so taken with her. You’re right there with him.

“Flirting with my date, are you?” Comes Bucky’s voice from the doorway, and you both turn to look at him. Then you remember yourself, and your situation. She’s just had sex with Bucky, and here you are, complimenting her lipstick.

And in this moment, you dig to your lowest familiar, and compare yourself to her. It’s not a competition, you know better than to fight over a man, but even if there were…you would lose by a landslide. Objectively.

Absentmindedly, you touch your hair while glancing at hers, dark, perfectly curled locks swishing about her shoulders and touching her elbows, even at its messiest. You don’t know if you want to look like her, or to be with her, in this moment.

“No, no. I was just asking her about her lipstick, that’s all.” She hands you her phone, ignoring Bucky, and asks you to enter your number with a wink. You happily comply, and almost miss the way her face falls when she reads over your name, and glances over her shoulder at Bucky. 

Clearly, you’ve missed something. You don’t want to ask. “I’ll call you,” she gestures to you, leaving you with a kiss on the cheek. You blink several times, trying to process the events of the past hour or so.

You’ve never been more confused. How did you end up with Bucky’s date’s number? “You’re quite the charmer, aren’t you doll?” He’s got that signature smirk on his face, but you look away. Something about his messy hair and flushed cheeks seems a sight that isn’t reserved for you, but the lover who just left the compound.

“No, I— I was just complimenting her, I swear. She seems nice, though. Are you gonna see her again?” He joins you at the table, and up close you can see the slight sheen of sweat on his brow, and you hate the way the sight of it stirs something in your lower belly. You want him, so bad. You want to be the reason he emerges from his room flushed and you leave with messy hair like you just rolled out of bed. Alas, it isn’t in the cards for you. Fortune and romance have never been entangled lovers in the story of your life, and you shouldn’t expect anything different in this chapter of it. You take another cold sip, hoping to swallow the bitter realisations you've stumbled across tonight.

“Well, considering I don’t even know her name, and you got her number, I doubt it.” He laughs, hoping you’ll chuckle alongside him. You’re not in the mood to talk about his sex life, and you feel like you’re about to throw up because of it, yet again. Now knowing his type is a dark, sexy feminine energy, you can’t bear it anymore. You are the very antithesis of it all — light, and soft. Maybe he even finds you sweet. But you’re not the one, not the one he wants.

You may be the one he spills his secrets to, but you know you’ll never be the red-dress femme fatale he takes to bed, or into his heart.

“Are we still on for tomorrow?” You ask, sparing him a quick glance then returning to look at your hands that just look too wrong. Palms too wide, fingers too stubby. She had hands like a fucking nail polish model. Everything about you feels wrong and misshapen in this moment. Bucky’s wondering what he did to upset you. He’d overheard you talking to Natasha, explaining clear as day that you’re not attracted to him. He’s simply taken it as his sign to move on, to try and bury his heart that he’s laid in your chest, instead of letting it consume him. That's why he said yes to Steve, why he left you to go out. He didn't want either of you to stew in uncomfortable silence because he doesn't want to admit what he heard and how badly it hurt him. To confess would be to lose you, and so he buries it all deep down. Just like everything else.

But it’s a lot harder than expected, especially when he brings a girl home, for the first time in decades, but all he can think of is you. He’s manoeuvring her hips and imagining them to be yours, kissing her lips and pretending you’re the one gasping against his mouth. He ended up so wrapped in the fantasy, your name had slipped past his lips as he came, even though he tried to hide it in a murmur against her shoulder. But, of course she heard. She’d lectured him for a couple of minutes while throwing her clothes back on, about how he shouldn’t be fucking around if his heart is so set on one woman, that he says her name when lost in the throes of passion with another. Then, she’d spun on her heel and left, and he’d departed to find you. 

To tell you, he can’t do it anymore. Despite your feelings of romantic apathy when it comes to him, he can’t say the same. He is enamoured, infatuated, obsessed with you, and he can’t let you go. He can't bury his feelings when they just keep building up like waves and crashing over the grave of his heart -- he can't keep it to himself. Even if your words seal the vault closed forevermore, he needs to hear them. He was so ready to beg for one date. One chance, one kiss, one taste. Maybe not in the moment, seeing as you wouldn’t appreciate the taste of another woman’s wine on his lips. He wouldn’t either, if that night you’d gone on the date with Steve, he'd let his impulsive thoughts win just moments after you kissed another's mouth. He wonders how you kiss as he touches his own lips in thought -- would you let the other take charge and cover him in sweet pecks, or do you prefer to taste like passion and sin? These were the only thoughts circling his smitten mind as he searched for you longingly. 

And then he found you, illuminated so beautifully in the light of the kitchen island, and it occurs to him, just how there is no competition between you and other women. They could never hold a candle to you, to the radiant sun of your essence and your beauty.

The woman seems surprisingly smitten by you, with your eyes on her lips, and her giving you her number. He doesn't blame her for feeling that electric pull to you. He's right there with her.

He also didn’t miss the look she gave him over her shoulder, after reading your name. She knows, that it’s you. She won’t come back, she knows better than that. But he can’t tell you that that’s the reason he won’t be seeing her again, and you won’t even look at him. 

“Yeah, doll. Of course. I’m not bailing on you again.” He smiles, gently touching your cheek, and you pull away before his skin makes contact.

“Alright, I’ll see you then.” You turn around and walk out, the tears in your eyes dripping down your face and leaving a salty trail all the way to your door.

                                            ————————

In the night, you’d done a lot of thinking. And you’ve decided to let him go, to let him do what he wants. He’s not evil, he’s certainly not wicked. He just doesn’t want you. That’s not something to hold against him, how could it be? He doesn’t owe you romance just because you want it with him. You’ll cherish his friendship, his strictly platonic affection, but you’ll let any thought of a relationship with him go. 

You’ll be all the better for it. 

And so you stand in the communal living room, rechecking your Taylor Swift themed tote bag that you’ve kept everything you need. You had taught Bucky how to bake his favourite brownies the other day, so you packed a few of those in case he gets hungry. Your favourite crisps, drinks for the both of you. Headphones, a charger for your phone, a claw clip to tie up your hair if it gets too hot, car keys, wallet…

It’s sunny outside, so you’ve opted for a long, maxi summer dress in a dark dusty rose colour and covered in gorgeous flowers, golden hoops and necklace like always, and your hair falls over your back loose and natural with a small accent braid weaving through the strands. You’ve also kept the makeup light — blush, kohl and mascara, and a tinted lip balm. You feel oddly good about your appearance, when you’re not in front of anyone else. When there’s nobody else to compare yourself to, you allow yourself to feel pretty. You throw on a thin white cardigan, grab your tote bag and head over to Bucky’s room to collect him.

You two are going out today. And you plan on buying him a surplus of items, all because of the massively fat pay check you get given courtesy of Tony. You’ll also be taking the subway, something Bucky’s a bit afraid of, but—

You almost crash into Steve when you turn the corner, in your mind being preoccupied with making an itinerary of where you’re going. He catches you, grabbing you around the arms. The both of you are a little on edge, given the failed outing of a few nights ago, but you had let him down gently. You did tell him you want to stay friends, even as he looked embarrassed and laughed about it. You didn’t tell him about your crush on Bucky, having decided to keep it under strict lock and key after being consumed by the feeling of wanting to kiss Bucky instead. You knew, in that moment, that nothing would've made him feel worse. You meet Steve’s pale blue eyes, offering him an apologetic smile.

“Oh my God, Steve. I’m so sorry, I didn’t see you there. Did I hurt you?” He shakes his head, chuckling at your panic.

“No, no. I’m completely fine. Don’t worry, dear. You look good.” He compliments you fondly, eyeing you up and down once. You smile, forgetting the initial panic that surged through your system.

You take the compliment at face value. “Thank you, Steve. That’s really nice of you.”

“Where are you going today?” He asks in polite conversation. You’ve already talked about this, about where you’re off to. Maybe he forgot.

“Oh, Bucky and I are going downtown today! I was planning on getting him some new clothes, you know, his current closet seems a little out of date. We’ll probably be back by 7 at the latest, but it depends on how picky he is, you know him. Oh, and before I forget, Denise is in charge while I’m away. Mr Fury and Mr Stark haven’t told us that there’s any major missions today, so it’s mainly the barebones team, so if anything happens today, you report to her. I’d much prefer to enjoy my first day out in months, but in case of absolute emergencies, of course you can contact me, alright? You’re the most responsible one of the bunch, so I’m trusting you to spread the message for me.” You gently squeeze his arm in reassurance. 

“Yeah, will do. You have fun today, okay? I’ll try my best to make sure nobody gets in a housefire or something. You’re one of the hardest working people I know, dear. You deserve this. And trust me, if you’re the one picking out the outfits, you could put him in a hot pink suit bejewelled to high heaven and he’d wear it happily.” 

You mouth drops. “You know what, that’s an amazing idea, thank you.” He laughs at that, and you smile. You’ve always been treated by past-partners like you’re the most unfunny person on the planet, like your jokes are tolerated and not laughed at. So it always surprises you when people find you funny. You welcome it, but it feels strange nonetheless.

And then Bucky appears, slinging an arm around your shoulders and pulling you into him. “Ah, the prodigal super soldier emerges,” you say, hand wrapping around his back almost stiffly as you try to calm your aching heart at the sight.

You know this will haunt you, when you’re feeling down on yourself. You’ll clutch at your chest once again, feeling stupid at the fact you ever thought this Adonis of a man would ever look at you twice. Why would he?

But for now, his friendship is enough. It has to be.

“Uh huh. Should we go, doll?” He tilts his head extremely close to yours, and it takes every conscious muscle in your body to stop yourself from closing your eyes. No need to embarrass yourself.

“Yeah. Let’s go.” You turn to the other supersoldier in the room, currently being the one left out. “Bye Steve. Please tell everyone what I told you.” He nods.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got you.” You smile and let Bucky lead you away, waving a quick goodbye over your shoulder.

“I wanted to ask, was last night awkward?” You try to ignore the comment as you both walk down the street, heading to his favourite bistro for breakfast. The sun is shining, the streets smell like something that isn’t piss, and you’re spending the day with your favourite person.

“Hm, no not really.” He stops the both of you at a busy intersection, pulling you into an alley, and pushing you against the wall. His arm is still secure around your waist so your back doesn’t crash too hard against the eroding brick and mortar, but unfortunately that means your hands end up on his…firm chest, and your thumbs can’t help but soothingly stroke from side to side. You can’t meet his eyes.

“Then why are you avoiding eye contact? Is there something I did wrong? Are you upset with me? Look at me, doll. Please.” His tone is pleading, borderline pathetic, but neither of you care. Your eyes meet his, and you try your best to not get lost in his eyes like sinking ships, so inviting that it takes everything in you to not jump.

To not kiss him. You crave to know what his lips taste like, but you shouldn’t. You keep trying to bury these intense feelings, and yet they keep building up like waves and crash over your grave, resurrecting you. And it feels amazing to be alive.

“I’m just…awkward about these kinda things.”

“What kind of things?”

“Sex. I mean, I heard you through the wall with Camille. And then, ten minutes later you were speaking to me like you weren’t just doing…all of that. It’s strange. I—“

“Do you think it’s bad? That I’m having sex?”

“I…what? No. No, no, Bucky, I’m not shaming you for having sex, God knows I should be the last one judging you for that…it’s just…I’m not used to that. People I’m close to... we all talk about it a while after...you know. I’m just not used to hearing you have sex and then seeing your face, like, ten minutes after. That’s all.” You smile then, touching his cheek as a way to assure him you’re telling the truth. Half of it, at least.

He leans into it so sweetly. “Okay. If that’s all, then… We should get going.” You nod, despite every bone in your body protesting moving away from this intimate moment. He feels the same, because every fear he’s ever had disappears at the warmth of your hand on his face. His eyes travel to your lips and you fix yourself, smoothing down your dress.

“You look absolutely beautiful in your outfit, by the way.” He silently adores you as you double check nothing’s been stolen from your bag, although you doubt someone is going to sneak between you two what with your hyper vigilance and Bucky’s enhanced senses.

You laugh. “You always think I look beautiful no matter what I wear. Even if I wore your sweatpants, you’d still say the same.” Smoke covers the both of you in a misty haze, but he swears he’s never seen you any clearer.

“Because you still look beautiful to me. You always do. Just accept the compliment, will you? You know you don’t have to work hard to deserve compliments, don’t you? They should be freely given.” He strokes your hair, admiring the tiny braid in between his fingers.

“I’m learning to.” You both smile at each other, and you let yourself feel the sweet swell of your heart, for once. Maybe that’s what will work. You just need to feel it all, and get it all out of your system. That’s how you end your crush on Bucky — feel until your reservoirs are empty, until you look over him one day and see nothing more than a good friend, a best friend even. It might takes years, it might even be next week. But this is your plan. 

“Now, should we go?” You extend your hand in a silent offering, to reconnect the bridge that you had temporarily abandoned in your moonlit insanity. He takes it, placing his metal hand firmly in your grasp and interlocking fingers. You notice how he’s wearing long sleeves and gloves, even in this peculiar hot day in November.  He must be boiling in that leather jacket.

For now, you lean into him, into his warmth even though you can feel yourself start to sweat, and you both walk hand in hand. To any outsider looking in, you two paint the picture of the perfect couple. You admire the red and orange leaves against a sky the colour of the eyes that are trained on you — memorising the curve of your nose and the pillow of your lips. In the bistro, you two sit comfortably close together, laughing silently over everything and nothing — like you’ve been dating for years.

The rest of the day goes by smoothly, the both of you laughing like everything’s funny. Like teenagers on the first date — giddy and carefree. Your phone doesn’t buzz once, and you love the feeling of Bucky’s hands on you. He always loves to touch you, whether it’s tracing your palms or leaning his chin on your shoulder in the subway because you’re on his lap in the only spare seat available. You love it too, never knowing someone would be so eager, so desperate to touch you and feel you so innocently.

You’ve always felt shunned — like you’re only worth touching for a partner’s sexual satisfaction, and other times you were made to be ignored and tolerated. But if even a friend can cherish you in this special, sacred way, you can’t help but imagine what a true, enamoured lover would do.

Both of you want it, can feel that your feelings could be something worth a forever and a half — but of course, misunderstandings have to get in the way.

They always do.

NEXT PART

[chelseeebe]

can you see me? (the way i see you)

summary: steve harrington had been your best friend for years. you had been there for every failed relationship, picked him up and brushed him off. all while being head-over-heels in love with the boy. but now things were getting more serious with his newest girlfriend and yous trent sure if your heart could handle it.

an: hey i literally hate this :D but wanted to write SOMETHING because it’s been so long !! i have a few more ideas i wanna hash out but life is so crazy at the mo! also side note: nancy wheeler i love u soz for making u the enemy<\3

!!: no use of y/n! a teensy bit of angst i suppose and very very brief eddie x reader

steve was your best friend.

was.

you still considered him your best friend but you weren’t sure that that feeling was reciprocated.

the pair of you used to spend pretty much every waking moment with one another. up until he started dating nancy.

quite honestly, you regretted even pushing him to ask her out. if you’d known that you were never going to see your best friend again you would’ve never been so encouraging.

if you’d known just how much your heart would ache seeing them together, how his doe eyes softened at the sight of her and his lips curled up into a smile at the mention of her name, you would’ve just kept your mouth shut.

the only times you ever really got to hang out with steve was at work, and even then sometimes nancy would be there.

you’re restocking one of the displays with robin, arm full of tapes when the bell dings and nancy walks through the door.

you barely give her a glance before steve is practically pouncing over the counter to get to her.

‘she’s here again?’ robin leans over and whispers to you, narrowing her eyes at pair of them kissing.

robin knew partially of your crush on steve, you hadn’t exactly told her just how much their relationship was hurting you but she had got the gist of it after your visible look of defeat you gave steve after he announced they were dating.

you roll your eyes, ‘they’re in looove, robin,’ you mock, watching as nancy giggles at something he whispers.

‘are you actually gonna do any work today, dingus?’ robin calls across the store, hands on her hips to show her disapproval.

steve straightens up, still holding onto nancy’s waist, ‘yes, yes i am.. but right now i’m going on my lunch break, is that okay with you, boss?’

‘you have thirty minutes, and i’m counting!’ she taps her watch as the couple traipse out the door, nancy clinging onto his arm.

‘god they make me sick,’ robin fake heaves, climbing to sit on the counter.

you chuckle, it was reassuring that you weren’t the only one with a distaste for their relationship.

robin gestures for you to join her, her eyes look pitifully at you, feeling bad for your unrequited love for steve.

you oblige and jump up onto the counter, leaning against her and sighing.

‘we need to find you someone else.. someone new and exciting,’ her hand finds yours, giving it a small squeeze.

‘rob.. i don’t want anyone else.. i’ll get over it eventually..’ you shrug, biting down onto your bottom lip.

‘hmm.. somehow i don’t believe that,’ she shakes her head.

you were extremely grateful for robin’s friendship. you’d only really connected after getting the job at family video but now you wouldn’t trade her for the world. especially with steve’s recent little escapade.

the day very slowly rolls on and steve eventually rocks back up, well over his allocated thirty minutes with his hair all messed up and flushed cheeks.

you ignore his very obvious demeanour and get on with your work, counting the minutes until you could go home.

-

robin slams the stiff door shut and clicks the lock, letting out an over exaggerated sigh of relief.

you follow steve into the parking lot where he turns to look at you, hand on top of his maroon car, ‘shit.. i can’t give you a ride tonight, i’ve gotta go and pick up nance.. but next time, definitely.’

you weren’t exactly ecstatic to be getting a ride with steve but it was a million times better than the bus and was now the only time it was ever just you two, how it used to be.

‘oh.. right,’ you stare at him, willing for him to just disintegrate in front of your eyes, ‘guess i’ll get the bus,’ you bite the inside of your cheek and spin on your heel towards robin who was watching your encounter.

‘i’m sorry! next time i promise i will!’ he calls out behind you before getting into his car and speeding off.

robin shakes her head, ‘what an asshole!’ she joins her arm with yours, heading towards the bus stop, ‘now are you ready to ditch him?’

‘ugh, i wish,’ you sigh, holding onto her arm and dramatically leaning your head on her shoulder in pure exasperation.

-

it had been a week since you’d seen steve, he’d called off from his last two shifts. a mysterious illness had meant you and robin were left to pick up his slack. much to robin’s dismay.

‘someone needs to give that boy a good smack, if you won’t i’ll do it,’ she groans as she rearranges her pile of vhs tapes into alphabetical order.

you were both stood waiting to see if steve was going to actually show up today or not, keith was starting to get aggravated with steve’s behaviour and for some reason you still felt the need to defend him, promising that he’d make up his lost shifts.

you couldn’t really explain why, he sure as hell wouldn’t have done the same for you but at the end of the day, he was, or once was your best friend, and you were undoubtedly, terribly in love with him.

steve steams through the door, pulling on his green vest and huffing and puffing that he was here.

‘nice of you to show up,’ keith quips, looking over at the flustered boy with a stern expression.

‘i’m sorry! my car.. i had to get gas and then there was traffic.. but i’m here! i’m here!’ steve practically screams, speed walking through to the back to clock in.

robin shoots you a look, rolling her eyes at his tardiness.

you can hear keith loudly reprimanding steve, complaining that he had to stay late to cover for him. in reality, he stayed twenty minutes later than he should to stand behind the counter and bitch about steve, either way you slyly appreciated steve getting told off.

keith eventually storms out of the room and out of the front door, you widen your eyes at robin and slink over to the back room to speak to steve, leaning against the wooden door frame as he angrily stuffs his stuff into his locker.

‘you good?’ you ask, eyeing his tense posture.

he runs a hand through his hair and turns to loom at you, ‘he’s a prick, i’m like.. five minutes late, not that big of a deal.’

‘hmm, try half an hour.. but yeah he is,’ you agree.

‘i was busy.. it’s just been..’ he sighs, his shoulders relaxing, ‘doesn’t matter, how have you been?’

‘i’m okay.. i wanted to ask you if you were still coming on friday? i know you’ve been sick and all..’ you tentatively ask.

friday was your twenty first birthday and you were finally going to host what was probably your first and last party at your new apartment.

‘err.. coming to what?’ steve asks, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

the date had been drummed into his head for months, with plans being discussed for weeks about who you were going to invite and what you were going to wear.

‘..my birthday? same day every year, steve,’ you scowl up at him.

his mind had been somewhere else entirely since getting with nancy, so much so he had forgotten his own best friends birthday.

‘oh shit! yes, yes of course i am,’ his eyes widen as he suddenly remembers why that date was so important.

‘you forgot, didn’t you?’

‘no! how dare you say that?’ he jokes, walking over and placing his hands on your shoulders, ‘i could never forget your birthday.. i’ve just been sick.. my brains all foggy.’

his attempts to redeem himself shouldn’t work, but they do. his big brown doe eyes gleaming down at you absolutely do not help as you’re already putty in his hands, ready to accept his apology.

you never could stay mad at steve. one time back in school he had genuinely forgotten to pick you up one morning, the same morning hawkins had decided to have torrential downpour, so you turned up to school resembling a drowned rat, soggy and miserable. but when steve had seen you storming towards him and realised his mistake, he dropped to his knees in the corridor, hands clasped together and already pleading for your forgiveness.

which you gave, of course. you were in love with the boy for christ’s sake, how could you not?

you attempt to hold onto your anger, jutting out your bottom lip but when he flashes that stupid cheesy grin you can’t help but return the smile and have to turn away before he notices how flushed your cheeks had become.

robin looks on in disgust and you scrunch up your face in return, getting back to your work and trying not to catch yourself staring at steve.

-

friday rolls around and there’s a steady stream of people entering your apartment, music blaring and drinks flowing.

you’d told everyone to get there for nine.

it was now bordering on ten and steve still hadn’t showed his face, which you try to not let damper your mood but it inevitably does.

robin is the first to notice, handing you a red cup full of a mysterious liquid that she practically forced you to down.

‘he’s an asshole, don’t let him ruin your night!’ she shouts into your ear, her hand on the small of your back.

you go to reply, being interrupted by the boy himself walking towards you, nancy in tow with a stoic expression painted on her face.

you don’t even mean to but you jump up, reciprocating his hug, ‘you’re late!’ you say into his ear.

‘i know.. i’m sorry.. we uh- happy birthday!’ he pulls back slightly, leaving a short kiss on your cheek.

you grin, letting go of his body and giving nancy a slightly awkward half-hug, thanking her for the birthday wishes.

‘let’s get you a drink!’ you pull steve into the kitchen, followed by robin attempting to make small-talk with nancy.

your pour a bottle of clear liquid into a cup, slightly over pouring due to your own intoxication and hand him the drink.

there’s some chatter with the couple before she inevitably takes him away, moving to their own corner of the kitchen.

maybe if you weren’t so drunk you wouldn’t have felt your heart sinking when his hand tenderly touches her arm, leaning in to whisper into her ear.

robin yanks you away from the kitchen and into the living room, ‘no! not tonight,’ she holds onto your hand, forcing you to move along to the music.

at some point someone suggests a game of spin the bottle and you groan, ‘i didn’t think we were still teenagers?’

‘oh stop it, it’s fun,’ robin says, taking a seat on the sofa and turning the music down a notch so you could all hear each other.

you end up sat next to eddie, who you knew back from high school, he ended up having to repeat a couple of years so ended up in a few of your senior classes.

the empty glass bottle is placed on the floor and you all look around, willing someone to go first.

‘well if none of you pussies are gonna do it, i will,’ eddie announces, leaning down to spin the bottle.

it spins and spins before stopping.. on you.

‘guess i gotta show the birthday girl some lovin’,’ he turns to face you and you roll your eyes but move towards him.

again, if not for the alcohol, you would’ve been a hell of a lot more bashful about this very public display of affection but you lean into him, his lips landing on yours.

your eyes flying shut and your hand resting on his cheek as his hand moves to the back of your neck, holding you in place.

you’re interrupted by someone loudly clearing their throat and you pull apart, hand still caressing his cheek.

you look up to find steve and nancy had entered the room, ‘what the hell have i just walked in on?’ steve asks.

you giggle, shuffling away from eddie, ‘s’just spin the bottle.. duh,’ you respond, shaking your head at him.

‘oh, duh,’ he remarks sarcastically, ‘can i speak to you for a sec?’

you furrow your brows but stand up from the sofa, eddie’s hand still lingering on your back, flashing him a small smile before walking over to steve.

you felt so silly. you were kissing a genuinely nice, attractive guy, and enjoying it too and yet you would still drop everything as soon as steve asked you to.

‘i think we’re gonna head out.. i just wanted to say bye before we left, have a good night,’ he murmurs, nancy standing stone-faced beside him.

‘you’re joking! i’ve hardly seen you.. you literally just got here!’ you frown at him, slightly infuriated that your supposed best friend couldn’t even hang around at your birthday party for at least an hour.

‘i know.. nance isn’t feeling too well.. we just wanted to come and wish you a happy birthday and that..’ he gives you a small, apologetic smile but disregard it.

‘you couldn’t even show up on time and now you’re leaving after barely being here an hour?’ you reply, slightly louder than expected.

‘i’m sorry.. i’ll make it up to you, chick,’ he reaches out to touch your arm but you recoil, the use of that nickname, one that had been given to you in high school and now only came came out when steve was apologising or trying to get his own way, making you pull back.

‘no.. don’t bother, it’s fine,’ you grit, tensing your jaw in an attempt to not say anything meaner to him.

‘c’mon.. don’t be like that.. you looked plenty occupied when we walked in anyway,’ he remarks and if it weren’t for nancy standing literal millilitres away from him, you could’ve sworn there was a twinge of jealousy in his voice.

‘what’s that supposed to mean?’ you glare at him.

his mouth opens and promptly shuts, leaving him looking like a gawping fish, ‘nothing.. look i’ll see you soon, okay? i’ve gotta take nance back..’ he places a hand on her back and basically pushes her out of the front room.

you exhale, spinning around to find that luckily everyone had gotten back to the game and ignored whatever the hell had just happened between you and steve, everyone except robin, who’s eyes were planted on you, that sad, pitying look.

she’s quick to jump up, already forcing her cup into your hand, ‘don’t even think about it.. it’s your birthday and that.. he’s not ruining your night, okay?’

you nod, appreciative of your best friend’s kindness and down the cup of liquor she’d handed to you, ready to squash the thought of steve out of your mind.

-

you wake up to robin poking your arm, groaning at the feeling in your head.

‘rob.. please no, i’m fragile,’ you grumble, but rolling over to face her, that cheeky grin on her face.

‘how ya feeling, buttercup?’ she asks.

‘like shit,’ you complain, curling up into the blanket.

‘well i’m not surprised, i’m glad you had a good night though,’ her hand reaches out to brush the hair from your face.

‘please tell me i didn’t embarrass myself?’

‘uh.. nah..’ she replies, slightly hesitant.

‘oh god… what did i do?’ you close your eyes, bracing for whatever embarrassing story she was about to relay.

‘well uh.. you remember kissing eddie, right?’

‘yeah.. just about..’

‘well.. you called him steve and then i caught you showing him to your room.. and that’s when i put you to bed.. see it’s not that bad,’ she tries to reassure you but she can’t stifle her smile.

you groan, pulling the duvet up and over your head, ‘no.. oh my god,’ you cringe at your own actions.

‘look, he was definitely way too drunk to remember.. don’t worry about it,’ she yanks the duvet down, exposing you to the harsh light.

‘i’m never drinking again, seriously,’ you complain, pouting at robin.

she laughs, ‘it’s really not that big of a deal.. trust me.’

‘i don’t believe you but i’m going to ignore all of that because i’m starving.. shall we get food?’

‘i am very down with that.. but you need to brush your damn teeth first,’ she giggles, moving away from you.

‘bitch,’ you joke, rolling out of the bed.

you were hoping to god that by some grace of god that eddie had forgotten. robin was the only person who knew of your unrequited love for steve and you were hoping that it’d stay that way.

-

you’re basically shaking as you walk into work, not wanting to face steve. it wasn’t exactly an argument but you were still pissed off with him and definitely didn’t want to stare into his grovelling eyes as he begs for your forgiveness.

there was no way you could stand up for yourself against him, no way you could ever tell him how much his and nancy’s relationship was hurting you, not without ending up telling him that you were head over heels for him.

you don’t see him as you walk into the store, waving at robin who flashes you a warning glance.

you look back, puzzled until you reach the back room and find steve on the phone, his knuckles white from his death grip on the piece of plastic.

he glances up at you before putting his other hand on the wall, ‘nancy, i have to go… no… i’m at work for fuck’s sake… look-… i’m going now… i’ll call you when i’m done,’ he slams the phone back onto the wall and sighs.

you silently place your things into your locker, your back to him.

‘well that didn’t sound great,’ you mumble, faffing about with your bag.

‘i just- i can’t.. every single day there’s something, i’m always in the wrong,’ he says, lightly hitting the brick wall.

you close your locker and look at him, ‘honeymoon phase has worn off, huh?’ you wanted to be kind but you were rightfully still pissed off at his disappearance on friday.

to be fair to steve, most of his relationships seemed to fizzle out by the second or third month, so to now only be experiencing this with nancy was an anomaly. girls got tired of his flirty nature and decided they’d had enough, or steve got bored, the excitement of a new relationship wearing off.

he scoffs, ‘yeah you can say that again.’

you raise your eyebrows, going to walk out of the room when his hand grabs your wrist, stopping you.

‘i just wanted to say i’m sorry.. i wanted to stay but nancy was complaining about something and if i’m not immediately jumping to her assistance then i get it in the neck,’ those soft eyes once again working their magic.

‘yeah.. it’s fine steve..’ his hand his still wrapped around your wrist and the simple feel of his fingers on your skin is enough to make you crumble.

‘no.. i’ve been a shitty friend- best friend, i wanna make it up to you, how about we do something after work? my treat?’ he blinks down at you, the corners of his lips twitching into a small smile.

‘no nancy tonight?’ it leaves your mouth without a second thought to how jealous it made you look.

he chuckles, ‘no, just me and my best friend.. like the old times.’

‘well.. if you’re paying, sure,’ you smile at him.

he rolls his eyes, dropping your wrist, ‘yes.. of course.’

before you can reply, the bell that resided on the front counter dings rapidly and you spin to see robin standing there abusing the metal dinger.

‘could use a little help out here, if you’re not too busy,’ she raises her eyebrows.

you walk out into the store, smiling to yourself for the duration of your shift, knowing that you were finally going to get some steve alone time.

-

sat in steve’s car after work, music playing out of the stereo and he’s quietly humming along and it feels exactly how it used to, before nancy was around, before your feelings had become incredibly complicated for him.

‘where are we going?’ you ask, still in your family video uniform, not wanting to have to be out in public in the green waistcoat.

‘i thought we could go and grab some food and then.. movie at yours?’

‘sounds good to me,’ you smile, ‘.. i’ve missed hanging out with you.’

you didn’t just miss hanging out with him, you missed him as a whole. how comfortable he’d be with you, how easy conversation just slipped off your tongue with him, sharing soft touches that now felt too awkward.

‘i missed you too.. i really am sorry that i’ve sorta just.. ditched you,’ he turns down the volume and pats your knee, causing your heart rate to go through the roof.

‘yeah.. you kinda did,’ you admit, shrugging.

he sighs, ‘i thought nancy was the one, you know? different than those other girls..’

‘you don’t think so anymore?’

‘i dunno.. she’s just always mad at me for something.. like i can’t do anything right,’ his shoulders slump.

‘maybe she’s just.. projecting.. i dunno, like she feels like she’s messing up and that’s how she’s showing it,’ it hurts to defend her, but you saw how much he was pining for her before they began dating, coming into work everyday with a new plan to make her agree to go out with him.

‘nah..’ he shakes his head, ‘i don’t think so.. like on your birthday she wanted to go, so we left and then we got back to her house and suddenly she was upset saying i should’ve stayed since it was your birthday.. like what the fuck?’

‘hmm.. i don’t know then,’ you shrug, looking down at your lap.

‘weird, right? anyway.. this is not about my relationship.. let’s stop talking about it,’ he pulls into the parking lot of your favourite burger chain.

-

the pair of you are lazing on the sofa, chatting over the movie playing on the tv when your phone rings causing steve to jump and knock over the half-empty can of beer.

‘nice one doofus,’ you say as you get up to answer the phone.

the voice on the other end takes you by surprise.

‘oh.. hello, nancy.. how are you?’ as soon as steve hears the name he shoots up from mopping up the liquid, shaking his head and motioning across his neck.

‘i am not here,’ he mouths.

‘uh… no, haven’t seen him since we finished work.. why is something wrong?’ you ask, glaring over at steve.

‘oh.. okay, well if i see him i’ll let him know… yeah, you too.. bye,’ you put the phone down and place your hands on your hips.

‘what the fuck, steve?’

‘what did she want?’

‘she wanted to know where you were.. apparently you were supposed to call after work,’ you stare at him, stern faced.

‘ohh shit, i forgot.. i’ll call her when i get home.. not that deep,’ he sits back on the couch and you join him although now further apart than you were before.

‘steve,’ you tut, ‘she sounds pretty pissed..’

‘when does she not?’ he rolls his eyes, ‘probably wants to yell at me for some shit i did or didn’t do right.’

‘i think she was just worried.. you better call her later and do not ever make me lie for you again, okay?’

steve turns his head to look at you fully, trying but failing to stop the laugh from coming out of his mouth, ‘you sounded like my mom then.. with your hands on your hips all bossy.’

‘oh shut up,’ you shove his shoulder, but can’t help the smile forming on your face.

he shuffles closer and leans his head down on your lap, eyes still looking up at you, ‘i’ve really missed this.. i hadn’t even thought about nancy once until then..’

you gaze down at him, trying to resist the urge to confess your feelings for him, wanting nothing more than to lean down and kiss his perfect pink lips.

‘it’s been nice.. you’re always nicer when you don’t have a girlfriend..’ you murmur.

he pouts up at you, ‘that’s not true.. i’ve been wanting to ask, what’s going on with you and eddie, huh?’

‘what? nothing,’ you shake your head, suddenly terrified of the possibility that those two had seen each other and eddie had told steve about your little freudian slip.

‘i’m just asking, you looked pretty close at your party.. that’s all,’ he sits up, leaning on his elbows, now only inches away from your face.

‘it was just a game, that’s it,’ you assure him, if only you could tell him just how much you didn’t want eddie, and wanted him instead.

‘so you don’t want me to put in a good word for you?’

‘no! besides, why would i want a boyfriend when i already have to put up with you?’ you joke, trying to change the subject.

‘you don’t put up with me you love me and love spending time with me,’ he smiles.

if only he knew just how much you really did love him.

‘hmm.. i suppose so,’ you admit defeat, he hadn’t broken eye contact once and quite frankly his stare was becoming quite intimidating.

you look back up at tv, hoping that he couldn’t feel the pounding in your chest, ‘you’re missing the movie.’

‘it’s boring anyway, i’m trying to talk to you,’ he pokes your arm, attempting to pull your attention back to him.

‘well i want to watch the film,’ you say pointedly, one more stare away from confessing your feelings for him and ruining years of your friendship.

‘look at me..’ he murmurs, another poke to your cheek which causes your eyes to flick back to his.

‘steve..’ you were seconds away from the words tumbling out of your mouth, his chocolate eyes softening at the use of his name. if this was how he acted with other girls when he was in relationship, there’s no surprise that it never worked out.

‘i just.. want your opinion on something, and be brutally honest,’ he shuffles closer, his back now leaning on your outstretched legs, ‘what do you think i should do about nancy.. truthfully.’

you sigh, ‘you really want me to be honest?’

‘yes,’ he nods.

you swallow, ‘i think.. i think you should end it.. i don’t think you’re happy and i don’t think she is either.. you’re only gonna end up hating each other if you keep dragging this out,’ it was entirely everything you wanted to say but it was your partial truth, sparing him of the details of your love.

‘okay,’ he exhales, ‘i feel like i’ve dated every last girl in this godforsaken town and i just.. i dunno.. it’s stupid.’

your heart beats faster, except me, ringing in your head.

‘you haven’t dated everyone.. maybe the one isn’t in hawkins.. how would you know?’ you say, biting your bottom lip.

‘i think she is.. i just.. don’t know if she knows it yet..’

you furrow your brows, puzzled, ‘what?’

‘i’m talking about..’ he trails off and breathes out before moving closer, softly placing his lips on yours.

you freeze for a second, unsure of what to do next. you’d thought about this exact situation many, many times but still had no idea how to react.

he pulls back, ‘shit.. i’m sorry..’ he goes to move away from you but you place your hand on his chest, causing him to look back into your eyes.

his lips crash onto yours again, slightly harder this time as you return the kiss, trying to pull him closer.

he sits up properly, not once breaking the kiss and moves his hand to caress your cheek.

‘mmm- no- steve..’ you pull away but his lips chase yours, lingering over your mouth as he groans.

‘w-what?’

‘i can’t.. i can’t do this,’ your hand attempts to push him back but he doesn’t budge.

‘why? what’s wrong?’ his eyes now open and looking back at your eyes brimming with tears.

you shake your head, ‘don’t do this to me if you don’t mean it,’ the lump in your throat growing.

‘i’m- sorry.. have i got the wrong idea here..’ he stumbles over his words, eyes searching your face.

you frown, unable to stop the tears from sliding down your cheek, ‘steve..’ here goes nothing, ‘if you’re just using me because you’re mad at nancy.. then don’t, god knows i’m far too in love with you to handle that..’ the lump finally dislodges and a sob escapes your lips.

‘i’m not.. you’re.. you’re in love with me?’ his face drops slightly and your heart sinks, immediately regretting ever saying anything.

you should’ve pushed him off. should’ve sent him home telling him to apologise to nancy. should’ve never kissed him back.

you nod, scoffing at the absurdity of it all, how your best friend, the man you were painfully in love had just kissed you and now you were admitting to your feelings in the strangest of situations.

he stares up at you, mouth agape and you want to just shove him away, completely unprepared for the inevitable rejection about to tumble out of his mouth.

‘i.. uh- i wish you’d said something..’

you look back up at him, wiping away the stream of liquid coming from your eyes, ‘what do you mean?’

he chuckles slightly and you freeze, was he going to laugh in your face? was he going to tell you that you were fucking stupid for ever thinking this could ever work?

but he just smiles up at you, ‘god.. i thought i was so stupid.. you know, i thought there was no was no way you would feel the same way.. you don’t give much away,’ he says.

you blink back at him, still digesting his words, trying to fully comprehend what he had just said, that your feelings weren’t just one sided.

you swallow, unable to find the correct words to reply to him.

‘are you okay?’ he dips his head down to touch his forehead with yours, maintaining the deep eye contact.

‘i-i.. oh my god.. i thought you were going to hate me..’ you stumble over the words, moving your hand to clasp his cheek.

your heart beats a thousand miles per hour in your chest, honestly surprised it hadn’t ripped through your skin by itself.

‘i don’t think i could ever hate you,’ he says, his breathe tickling your cheek.

he doesn’t believe you when you tell him how long you’d felt this way about him, you were so so sure that you’d given yourself away a multitude of times but steve wasn’t exactly the brightest nor the most observant.

and he sits there remembering all the times he was going to tell you about his feelings but chickened out, ‘you were so.. adamant about nancy.. so i just thought you weren’t interested.’

it really couldn’t be any further from the truth, only wanting to push him towards nancy to stop yourself from being hurt.

but now you didn’t have to, he was undoubtedly yours. there was no need to hide away or pretend that you were pleased about whichever new girlfriend he was bringing around this time, your best friend was yours.

[infiniteeight8]

Ironstrange:

" What, because he is an asshole he couldn't be hurt? Dare i say he is an asshole because he was hurt all his life."

I went with this as general inspiration instead of a direct quote.

Also, I like Hope, but I needed someone who didn’t know Tony particularly well and had *some* reason to think poorly of him, but nothing super personal. Scott would also have worked, but he’s one of my favorite characters and I couldn’t stand to use him this way, so Hope it is. LOL.

-

“I’m not saying you can’t handle it,” Tony tells Hope impatiently. “I’m saying, back up is never a bad thing in these situations, and I’m the only person who has half a chance of understanding what’s going on if something goes wrong with your gadget.”

“I don’t particularly want you to understand what’s going on,” Hope shoots back.

Tony’s flinch is so tiny, so well suppressed, Stephen’s not sure if anyone other than him saw it. Tony presses his lips together for a moment, then relaxes all at once. “You know what? You’re right, this mission doesn’t need more than one hero in a highly engineered suit.” He pushes his chair back from the table and stands. “So I’m going to go do something productive.”

Stephen looks around the table, but no one else—Steve, Hope, Rhodes, and Sam—seems confused. “I’d appreciate it if someone could explain what just happened.”

Steve and Sam look away. Rhodes sighs, but explains. “Hope’s father, Hank Pym, used to work with Howard Stark. They had a severe falling out. I don’t know what actually happened, but Hank Pym has been loudly proclaiming for years that Stark Senior stole his research.”

“And this has what to do with you and Tony?” Stephen asks, catching Hope’s gaze and holding it.

She sets her jaw. “Dad was pretty clear that you can’t trust a Stark.”

Stephen raises both his eyebrows. “The only person I’ve seen perpetuating their father’s mistakes in this situation is you.”

“Tony hasn’t exactly gone out of his way to build bridges—” Steve starts.

“And why is that Tony’s responsibility?” Stephen cuts him off. “Has it really never occurred to you,” he cuts a glance over to Hope to make sure she knows she’s included, “that Tony is abrasive specifically because of reactions like yours? Do you think you’re the first people to judge him on his father’s mistakes?” The silence that follows is strained. Stephen shakes his head and stands. “You know, it occurs to me that this mission doesn’t need a magic user, either.”

Hopefully, he’s given them something to think about, but he wouldn’t bet on it.

[upat4amwiththemoon]

Unwanted animal | part 3

Summary: Because that unwanted animal wants nothing more than to get out.

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x female!reader

Warnings: talk of killing

Word count: 1948

a/n: reminder that this series is already fully written, so sadly I can’t take any ideas into consideration!

Tags: @thought-of-you-and-me @rafecameronswhore @sayah13 @strangegardentaco @natashamaximoff69

masterlists | guidelines

All parts: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7

The slight cloud coming from her breathing is the only thing in her line of sight besides the empty corridors. The building is seemingly abandoned, as all the doors were open and windows broken, bringing in the winter coldness, but they’re still careful as they move through it.

The team is in the northernmost part of Russia, checking out a building said to be one of HYDRA’s hide outs. Although, if it was in their use, it definitely doesn’t seem to be actively used anymore.

Y/N holds her gun with both hands, pointing it forward as she creeps the hallway forward. Occasionally she hears someone talking in the earpiece she has, clear and empty being the only words. They’re all separated, everyone on a different part of the building. It’s not big, but still spacious enough to not see or hear anyone else.

Setting her hand on a door handle, she pushes the door open slowly, being cautious for any unrecognizable sounds coming from inside. She steps one foot in, then another, looking over the whole room. “Clear.” She mumbles for the others. The room is small, but it has a few cabinets in it, so she starts going through them.

Most of the lockers are empty, but one of them has a thin file with the HYDRA logo on top of it. With a hum, she flips it open. There’s only one file inside, with most of the text blacked out. After a quick glance, Y/N closes the file and stuffs it inside her suit before continuing her way forward. “This place seems like it’s completely emptied out. Take anything you can find with and circle back to the Quinjet. Let’s go back home.” Steve’s authoritative voice comes through the earpiece.

Y/N doesn’t answer, she walks deeper into the building, not having looked through all the possible nooks and crannies. Her steps are light and silent. She moves like a shadow, just like she was taught to. When she comes to the end of the hallway, her foot kicks something solid. She crouches down to inspect the item, tilting her head in recognition. It’s a ballet shoe. The pink color of it has faded and turned into something more similar to grey. It’s not in a tidy condition, showing it has clearly been used. There are holes and scratches on it, and parts of the laces are gone.

Standing up, Y/N kicks the shoe under a cabinet and starts walking back towards the entrance. Her gun is back in her holster and her steps aren’t careful anymore. She knows the building is empty.

The file and single piece of paper are splayed on a table. The Avenger’s are standing around it, trying to make sense of what’s in front of them. “That’s you?” Tony asks, looking at a picture with a child on it.

“Yes.” Biting the nail on her thumb, Y/N stares at the picture. “I don’t remember someone taking a picture of me.” She mumbles.

“You look pretty out of it.”

The old looking, blue toned picture is of Y/N laying on a medical table with her limbs tightly bound with thick belts. Her eyes are open, but she doesn’t look conscious enough to understand anything going around her. There are two scientists beside her, the other holding a large needle near Y/N’s arm. Neither of their faces are visible.

Project Super Soldier Serum

Test subject #3: Y/N [redacted]

Age of subject: [redacted]

Date of experiment: [redacted]

Start time: 04:23

End time: 09:38

Test subject is injected with serum believed to contain the ingredients of the Super Soldier serum, [redacted].

[redacted] subject behaves [redacted] effects are [redacted] bad consequences. Serum [redacted] wrong [redacted].

[redacted]

[redacted] hallucinations and paranoia.

[redacted]

Test subject reacted [redacted] death [redacted] aggressive.

Experiment results: inconclusive

Experiment will be done again.

“Do you remember anything happening in this picture?” Natasha’s soft gaze is locked on the side of Y/N’s face. She isn’t even trying to hide how she feels from the others, she’s too worried about the woman next to her.

“I-“ she takes a deep breath, she’s losing her composure, “I remember going to the experiments. I remember them telling us what they’re going to do to us. And then…then I remember waking up in my cell.” Her brows are scrunches together and eyes stuck on the picture in front of her. “Not long after waking up, someone would come tell me what happened during the experiment, but I don’t have any memories of going through it.”

“That’s okay.” Steve states, gathering up the file, having seen the look on Natasha’s face. This is enough for today. “At least now we have confirmation HYDRA is really trying to recreate the Super Soldier serum. Good work everyone, go rest.”

Y/N and Natasha walk in silence, the latter occasionally glancing to the side to see Y/N’s face. No matter how good she is at reading people, it’s always difficult to read someone with the same skill set as her. “You okay?” She asks once they near their rooms. Y/N nods silently. “Do you want to watch a movie, or something? To wind down, and stuff.” Her hand goes to the back of her neck, nails scratching it lightly.

“I’d like to be alone today, if that’s okay?” Y/N doesn’t meet Natasha’s gaze. Her hand is already resting on the handle of her door.

“Of course.”

Without saying anything else, Y/N opens the door and goes inside her room. As the door closes, Natasha frowns, her hands falling to the side of her body. She wants to be useful, to help Y/N get over her traumatic past, but she doesn’t know if she’s capable of doing that. After all, she is still struggling with her own trauma.

Muddled screams wake Natasha up from her sleep. She sits up quickly, her senses instantly heightened for potential danger. Realizing the sound came from Y/N’s room, she gets up and runs to the room next to hers. The light from the hallway allow Natasha to see Y/N’s huddled form in the middle of the bed. Her shoulders are moving up and down quickly, and her face is buried between her hands.

Natasha closes the door so the harsh light wouldn’t bother her before going to sit next to Y/N. She sets her hand on her back, moving it softly. “Hey, tell me what happened.” Her voice comes out as a whisper as if not to scare her.

Y/N shakes her head.

“Was it a nightmare?”

Moving her hands away from her face, Y/N nods. “Yes.” The whisper is almost too quiet to hear.

Natasha sets her palms on Y/N’s dry cheeks. Her thumbs rub the soft skin under them. “Do you want to talk bout it?” Shaking her head once again, Y/N leans her whole body against Natasha. After a moment of surprise, Natasha wraps her arms around her body, holding her close. “Everything’s going to be okay. The nightmares will get less frequent over time, and I’m always here to help you.”

“Can you sleep here with me, please?”

“Yeah, yeah of course. Come on, lay back down.” Moving the covers out of the way, Natasha lays down to the bed and then pulls Y/N on top of her. She throws the covers over them while Y/N hides her face in the crook of her neck. “Try to go back to sleep, you’re safe here with me.” She starts brushing her fingers through her hair. “Did the file you found today make these nightmares come?”

“I think so.” Her voice comes out as a mumble, her mouth being restricted by Natasha’s hair and neck.

Natasha hums, deciding not to say anything else and staying awake until Y/N falls back asleep.

For the next few nights, Y/N either asks Natasha to sleep in the same room with her, or she knocks on her door after midnight, asking if they could share a bed. Natasha always says yes. She cherishes sleeping next to her. It gives her warmth, and not only because she is sleeping next to another body, but some deeper kind of warmth. The kind that settles her brain and makes her feel more relaxed and refreshed once she wakes up in the morning.

It becomes a routine for them.

The more Natasha’s demeanor, and even personality, changes around Y/N, the more the other Avengers have noticed it. It is surprising for them, having always known Natasha as the calculated one who didn’t do relationships, but they like the change.

They believe Natasha has found someone who understands her and is able to help her. Someone who no matter what, stays by her side. Someone who could be her person. And everyone thinks she deserves to have that person near her, even if she doesn’t believe that. Y/N could be the one to make her realize, she deserves good, that she isn’t evil. There’s hope for her. She can wipe the red off her ledger.

They just hope Y/N is good enough for her.

“What’s your take on love?” Wanda asks Y/N, who happened to wander into the kitchen while she’s cooking.

“Love?” She leans her hip against a counter near the witch, her arms crossed over her chest. “I don’t know. I was taught to think of love as a weakness, to only use it against someone.”

“Have your feelings of love changed?”

The quiet hum of the hood vent and occasional clangs of the ladle hitting the side of the pot fill Y/N’s head. Love is a weapon. “Maybe,” she looks away from Wanda’s awaiting gaze, “I’d like it to mean something more than a leverage.”

Wanda nods with a hum. “Could you tell me about it? The Red Room, Natasha rarely talks about what happened in there.”

“We were taught to respect and fear the place, to think of our superiors as gods who have saved and blessed us. Being in the Red Room was a gift and the highest honor anyone could ever get. Which meant we were better than the rest.” She turns to look at Wanda with a small glint in her eye. “No one could take it away from us, except our superiors. So, we had to outshine each other every single day, we had to be the best, but only one could be. We were at war with our peers and there were no laws. Only when we went to missions, then we had to tolerate each other. Failed missions weren’t tolerated.”

“What happened if a mission failed?”

“They made us kill the failures.”

Wanda turns the stove off, afraid she’ll burn the food as she listens. “Did you kill many of your peers?” She’s almost scared to ask.

“Yes. I was the best.”

“You liked being the best.”

“I did. It gave me power over the others, and power in a place like the Red Room is essential if you want to survive. I wanted to live. I would’ve done anything to stay alive, and I did many terrible things.”

“Do you regret them?”

Y/N looks down. “Of course.”

“But you wouldn’t be alive if you hadn’t done them.” Wanda tilts her head. She has a sympathetic look on her eyes.

“No, I wouldn’t.”

Walking over to her, Wanda engulfs Y/N in a hug, who takes a step back in surprise, but lets it happen once the initial shock is gone. “I’m glad you’re alive.” Wanda whispers, sounding genuine.

“I am too.”