#because of everything he'd seen ans went through as a kid with the other part being on him OFC BC taking responsibility is something | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mad-hunts · 5 days ago

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so... i've been thinking about auriel again because i actually did have an account for her once upon a time (just on another platform) + all i can remember is doing this roleplay on there with barton immediately asking the person whom told him they saw her was whether she was okay because she had went missing with no trace for years after all. and additionally, this was also while shedding tears like there was NO tomorrow, which is 😭 like he isn't a good person, y'all, but he does have his moments where it actually seems like he genuinely cares about people

#OF MONSTERS AND MEN: musings.#ooc post.#and to expand on this i'm going back to the point that i believe i stated a long time ago about barton being confusing at times #i mean as a character OFC because he did things like take jack julien and ben in without expecting anything in return from them #man's just spotted jack and julien in particular after they'd been abandoned by their foster parent + he saw themselves in them a #little bit because at a very young age he went from having one person in his life to having none. and barton himself knows that his dad was #a POS while he was alive but he wanted so badly to be loved by him even though wesley usually never gave him the time of day #if he wasn't actively being barton's ab*ser and this made his feelings towards wesley more complicated than one could explain even #though he KNOWS that what wesley did to him was wrong and he should absolutely hate his dad for what he did to him.#it's just that barton felt abandoned by his mother + so he poured himself into his relationship with his dad BC he was all he had #if that makes any sense buttt yeah. barton taking in those two was an arguably good thing though i know that barton is certainly not #the best caretaker to say the least they wouldn't have survived on their own. and barton trying to be a better person (albeit with mixed-#results) for marcy also showed that he was willing to sacrifice some thing's for her but barton is ultimately like. the worst-#whenever it comes to impulse control + he had this bloodlust in him that was there since at least his teenage years partially #because of everything he'd seen ans went through as a kid with the other part being on him OFC BC taking responsibility is something #you've got to do no matter what but GAHHH. yeah i just... i'm thinking about my angel girl today even though she ain't a literal angel #she could just manifest wings out of her own blood or someone else's because she can make constructs out of it (blood)#tw: blood #tw: child abandonment #tw: child abuse #tw: unhealthy family dynamics.

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