#because it's not their place to talk about politics!! their number one focus should be cricket!!!!!!!

[an-absolute-nightmare]

me: india is not secular anymore it's turning into a hindu nationalist country :(

my so called liberal and open minded parents: india is not secular anymore it's turning into a hindu nationalist country :D:D:D:D:D

[theholypeanut]

Planet Hotline Disaster

Summary: Kurona got a crush on a new girl… who is way taller than him

Cw: fluff, insecure Kurona, cute Kurona, tall!Reader f!reader, Isagi, Bachira and Chigiri being disasterous virgin besties, getting secondhand embarrassment for Kurona [*], 1.1k words

Kurona Ranze never expected to fall in love. Love was just something he never thought about, he had other things in his life: football, sharks, his routine, braids - just not romantic love. And it was fine - his life felt full and happy.

Then one day he met you and everything just went upside down. Before, Kurona never thought twice about his height - it’s not an important thing for football so why would he care?

“Ah Damn, she looks like a freakin’ giraffe” he heard his classmate commenting loudly on the hallway. When he turned around, his stomach flipped. You were so beautiful: long legs, beautiful eyes, amazing hair just right for braids - and you were definitely taller than him.

“Dude, shut up. Honestly she must be a model, because damn” - he had no idea who said it, but Kurona agreed in his mind. He never saw a more beautiful human being.

It was the beginning of your second year in high school and you changed schools because of your parents new job in this city. You felt so out of place, still awkward and way too shy to answer to the comments, so you just pretended like you cannot hear it. Anxiety was eating you from inside out and the fact that you were easily taller than any other girl in your year did not help.

The fact that you became desk mates was like in a movie - Kurona definitely felt like it was a string of fate in his favour. You were always so nice to him, so polite, that he couldn’t help but blush way too often for his own sanity. On the other hand every time he wanted to talk to you, words were just stuck in his throat. Sometimes you’d ask a question and he answered the most ridiculous and incoherent thought he had, because his brain just stopped responding. And you couldn’t stop thinking how adorable he looks when he blushes.

At this point all of his football friends knew what was going on.

“You know, you should ask her for her number” suggested Isagi during lunch “she seem to like you, and you can always use the excuse that you didn’t hear what was the homework, or ask her about school”

“Actually this is not such a bad idea” Chigiri agreed “it’s not like you are asking her out yet. Also maybe writing will go easier than talking.”

Kurona avoided eye contact and just sit there quietly eating his bento.

“You know you cannot just look at her and blush forever” Bachira added, what felt like a knife in the heart. He could. Actually, looking at you from the distance and watching you laugh, smile, or focus on the lesson was just enough for him. What made him feel sick to his stomach was the idea you’d find someone and fall in love. That this another person will come to your desk to flirt with you, hold your hand in the hallways, or take you home. Idea of watching you happy shouldn’t feel so bad, however all of this potential images just made Kurona nauseous. The truth is, he was too embarrassed to admit it even to himself, that he wants to do all of that stuff - not seeing someone else taking you away. However how could you ever choose him? You were so out of his league. Girls like you don’t want short guys like him.

The closest he’d ever gone to a romantic moment with you, was when you were doodling animals in your notebook during a boring class, and he couldn’t stop looking at your hands. You noticed how much he paid attention to the drawing, so with this beautiful smile, you took his notebook and drew the cutest shark he ever saw, with a tiny heart next to his head. If he could, he’d cut this page out and frame it, put next to the bed and just look at it before going to sleep everyday.

“How do you even ask girl for a number?” Kurona asked with a weak voice. His friends went silent. The truth was, well, all of them were quite disasterous virgins.

“You can for example told her to send you photo of her notes later, because you didn’t pay attention during class” Chigiri suggested.

“Or you can tell her that her number would look so good in your phone!” Bachira said with enthusiasm. Isagi and Chigiri sent him a stinky side eye.

“Yeah Bachira, I don’t know if you remember, but the last time she asked him if she can borrow his notebook, he answered “mozzarella”” Chigiri were ruthless in his words. “I think this line might leave a wrong impression”

Just for the reminder of Mozzarella Incident Kurona’s face turn red.

“You can just say she looks pretty” Isagi added. “Simple, easy. I don’t know. Compliment her hair.”

“Yeah, girls love it when you compliment their hair” Chigiri nodded. “This one would be the best. From there when conversation starts, you can ask if she maybe wants to exchange contacts. You can do it!”

All hyped up, Kurona came back to class. I can do it, he thought. I can ask her. He gathered all of his mental strength when you sat next to him for the next period. And for entire class he was repeating in his head what he will say to you.

Your hair are so pretty. I didn’t pay attention, could you maybe give me your phone number, so you can send me your notes later?

“Kurona-kun, lesson already ended” he heard your angelic voice. He felt like his brain got overheated.

“Oh, yes, yes. Sorry” he said, feeling that his hands begin to shake. It’s now or never. “Em!” He said to get your attention on him.

“Yes?”

“Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention on class, could you maybe give me your number so can you send me your hair later?” He said on one breath.

“You want me to send you… my hair?”

Brain.exe stopped responding.

“No no no, I mean, your hair are so pretty, and I think you would look so pretty in my phone”

Oh no.

At this point you couldn’t even keep a straight face. Kurona’s face had almost the same colour as his hair. You giggled. He wanted to just vanish from the face of the earth.

“Oh really?” At this point it was almost cruel to tease him. “You know, I think you would look very pretty in my phone too.”

You took a step towards the pink boy and leaned down right next to his ear. You touched his cheek right next to the short braid and made him shiver.

“I really like you too”

By slowlyholypeanut

I was 🤏 this close to naming this fic Mozzarella Incident

Also this was supposed to be his birthday fic, but I was too tired with life - but happy birthday to our best boy!

[teecupangel]

We have put Desmond in a lot of situations, but seeing the recent ask about Ratonhnhaké:ton becoming a Templar got me thinking: What if after a few years on the run, Desmond gets discovered by Abstergo early? But instead of kidnapping him, they set up a scenario, where Desmond gets offered a job by them and he accepts. Eventually they convert him to the Templar mindset(wanting order isn't a bad thing, right?) and maybe a cell of assassins find out about Desmond working at Abstergo and rush to try and kill him. This, alongside his shitty upbringing, gets Desmond to finally fully throw himself into becoming a Templar(he was reluctant before, Templars are the bad guy, that' what his father slways said... right?). He could even train with Daniel and become an assassin hunter. :D

Everyone knew who Desmond Miles was.

It was hard not to considering he was William Miles’ son.

But no one would ever dare say that to his face.

William Miles was a forbidden topic in the presence of Desmond Miles.

Vidic ordered it himself.

Daniel hated him before he even met him.

He only heard the gist of it from Vidic.

A sixteen year old runaway who didn’t even know just how dangerous the real world was, found by Abstergo because he caught a fever that left him bedridden and sent to the nearest free clinic which was, fortunately for Vidic, under Abstergo control.

And now he was finally meeting Desmond Miles, 6 years later, to be his instructor.

6 years was a long time to indoctrinate someone but Desmond Miles was supposed to be a skittish boy so Vidic made him his pet project.

A son.

He called him.

How laughable.

Daniel knew how that play goes, having been the focus of it before.

But unlike Desmond Miles-

No.

Desmond Vidic.

The name made Daniel want to vomit.

Unlike that idiot, Daniel had no choice.

The trigger they place on him made him kill the last mentor. He was the Brotherhood’s number one target.

And Daniel’s sanity could only be preserved by the Animus under Abstergo.

He had no choice and he didn’t give care.

Dr. Sung always furrowed her brows whenever he said that.

Was it the truth?

Was Daniel lying to himself?

Who knows?

Who cares?

What he does know is that he hates Vidic’s adopted son.

He had the choice.

He’s just stupid enough to fall for the indoctrination.

No.

He was weak.

William Miles and his lovely (his neck throbbed at the reminder of that bitch managing to graze the side of his neck, that sniper rifle only missing its mark thanks to Daniel’s quick reflexes and Eagle Vision) wife had made him weak.

And now he was to become like Daniel.

An Assassin turned Assassin Hunter.

He sees him before he even got to the meeting room they were supposed to meet.

A nice suit that hugged his form, most definitely tailored and expensive.

He could afford it.

Daniel saw in his files that he had a salary larger than a supposed assistant for someone like Vidic should have.

Another way to keep him in their grasp, he supposed.

Money.

Connection.

… Family.

Vidic really went all out.

Why wouldn’t he?

Desmond was the perfect Animus candidate. The scion of the Ibn-La'Ahad and the Auditore. What mysteries they could uncover from the memories of his ancestors.

Vidic was bidding his time though.

He still had other Animus subjects to torture and Desmond was better off hunting what remains of the Brotherhood in the meantime.

“Daniel Cross?”

Daniel’s feet stopped before he knew it.

Their eyes met as Desmond slowly turned to face him.

His lips curved into a polite smile.

The kind of smile the receptionist always gave whenever she had to talk to someone.

But his eyes.

Those were the eyes of someone who had killed before.

For a moment, Daniel thought that Vidic had ordered him to kill someone.

But no.

Vidic was more meticulous than that.

He must have orchestrated the situation in which Desmond would have no choice but to kill someone.

And then he would come in moment’s later, pretending he had rushed to the scene as soon as he heard, perhaps even bring a few men with him in an attempt to make Desmond believe he had tried to save him.

Yes.

That was more like Vidic.

Daniel hated the fact that he wanted Vidic’s acknowledgment even after knowing the man that he was.

And here was the boy who held Vidic’s ‘fatherly affection’.

Would he break if Daniel was to tell him Vidic orchestrated it?

Or would he not believe it and try to kill Daniel?

Daniel won’t tell him though.

Because that would only disappoint Vidic.

So he took a step towards the young man.

“Call me ‘mentor’.” He ordered.

Something appeared in Desmond’s eyes but it was snuffed out before Daniel could see what it was.

Annoyance?

Amusement?

He couldn’t be sure.

Desmond’s (fakefakefakehehatesitfakefakefake) polite smile stayed as he replied.

“Sure. If you’re into that kind of roleplay.”

Daniel’s lips twitched as he remembered.

The annoying thing about Vidic’s adopted son was that…

He was a brat.

(this can totally be the ‘prologue’ to this idea if you want to add time travel to it)

[short-black-diamond]

Hello i loved your luna story can i request for the smut asks Top towards their sub number 3 for him ( if you are not comfortable writing about him could it be aiku instead)? Thank you in advance😊

Yeah I'd rather take Aiku because since Luna is like--more like a side character and stuff... I think I'll make a list who I don't want to write for...

Also lemme turn Blue Lock into a brothel real quick yeah?

There's also something I've wanted to say about this fic. I have never had intercourse and I'm still a proud virgin. So this fic will be based solely on what I imagine would happen, and I hope you guys will llike it because I've spent a lot of thought and time into this.

Warnings: Oliver Aiku x reader, Smut., Vanilla sex because first times should be sweet as fuck, also Oliver is the biggest dork in here but tries to be hot and attractive, also Oliver will cry at some point, strangers to lovers I guess?

I will proofread that on another day. please ignore the possible writing mistakes.

taglist: @wishiknewwhatiwasdoingwithmylife, @hsxhype, @shirayuki-ayumi, @luysim, @mayincharacter

Word count: 5,924 wtf 😭✌💀

---

"Lemme quit my job for ya..."

It was embarrassing. Pretty much so, with you being a virgin, your friends having thought it would be a great idea to bring you to the freakiest place in town, and that on your birthday.

Yeah, you were in for something.

...

"For the last time,", you seethed angrily at your best friend, "I am perfectly fine being a virgin!"

"Yeah, sure you are. But your browser history and your dildos say otherwise~", she mused as you blushed.

"It's called loving myself, and putting myself first. I enjoy doing things alone, and that includes pleasing myself.", you grumbled as you defended your dignity.

She sighed. "____, you're twenty-one today. It's time you get the feeling of a man's touch on you.", cue you giving her a disgusted look. "I'd rather die than let a man touch me, and where are we going exactly??"

"Oh, you'll see soon enough."

...

"What the...?!"

"Welcome to Blue Lock, where the boys here are specialised for pleasing lonely women like us!", she cheered before she dragged you inside, who tried running away.

"Please, let me go!", you yelled in fear, but her grip was relentless as she led you to the counter. "Hello, could we have Aiku and Otoya please, Anri?", she asked, and the woman on the counter smiled.

"Of course, please enjoy yourselves!", she exclaimed and she and your best friend laughed as if this was a joke. Which it was...but you didn't find it funny.

And in the next moment, you found yourself in front of a room, where your friend was in the other storey. You took a deep, exhausted breath before you softly knocked.

"Hello..?", you asked politely before you opened the door, and it was dark. You sighed before you went further into the chamber. You closed the door softly, and only after the click did you hear something.

It sounded like somebody stood up from the bed which was right in front of the door, and before you knew it, you were laying on it, and a man on top of you.

"Damn, what a pretty thing you are..", he rasped, looking into your wide eyes. Heterochromia, two different sets of eye colours on each eye.

They were truly mesmerizing, but you couldn't really focus on that when you felt something hard poking you, and the man above you biting his lip at your pretty face.

"Huh..?", you only said, still a little bamboozled that a stranger threw himself on top of you.

"So, what's it gonna be today, sweetie? Bondage...butt plugs...roleplay?", he breathed, wetting his lips when he thought about ravaging you.

"I-I'm a virgin..?", you only answered and hoped you wouldn't regret this. You had absolutely no idea what he was talking about.

And sure, the guy who was hovering over you was hot and all, and the LED light did a great job casting him into a red light, making him look all the more attractive, but you didn't really want to get your world rocked at your first time.

Fortunately, the guy had the dignity to quickly turn away from you and sit upright as he stared ahead of him as he scratched his neck. "Damn, sorry baby...But really? Are you really a virgin?", he asked as he looked down at you.

You were still laying there in your coat and boots as you looked at him. You turned to the side to face him better. You blushed at his question as you played with the scarf around your neck.

"yes...and please don't tease me for it..", you grumbled when you thought about how your friend bullied you on your entire ride there.

You heard faint slapping and moaning noises and you curled in yourself as you squeezed your eyes shut and you put your hands on your ears. Yeah, you were jealous at the other girls who got laid here.

The guy sitting next to you looked up at the ceiling, thinking about his boner and how pretty you looked.

'There's no way a woman this pretty is still a virgin..right?', he thought as he looked down at you again, only to grow concerned when he saw how you've turned into a ball.

"Shit, are you okay?! Hey, you hear me?", he asked in a worried tone as he scooched closer to you. You looked at him.

"Yeah, it's just...the noises.", you said, and the guy understood.

"How about..we kiss? Have you ever kissed anybody?"

"I've never even had a crush.."

"Damn.", the guy said and you whined in protest. But, he didn't mean it like that. He was surprised that you were a hard-core virgin who had yet to smile at a boy.

He huffed in amusement. "Would you like to do something? Or do you not wanna kiss me?", he asked.

Normally, he would've told a girl off when she didn't want to do anything, but it was different with you. If you didn't want to do anything then he'd be ready to cuddle you, and if you also didn't want that, then he'd just lay there with you on the bed, either talking, looking at the ceiling and just chilling.

"mh...well...I k-kinda do...but i dunno...", you murmured as you closed your eyes again.

"Can you...tell me a bit about yourself?", you asked, and hoped that you didn't break a rule. 'Maybe he just likes to fuck strangers and get paid? Can I even ask that?', you thought as you awaited his answer.

"The name's Oliver Aiku. I work here as a people pleaser in Blue Lock and I hope I can please you too, sweetheart."

you giggled. "That was a nice introduction. I can't believe my best friend brought me to a brothel on my birthday though.."

At that, Oliver laughed. "What?! She really did that? Damn...she must've been desperate to have you get railed, huh?"

You groaned in embarrassment. "Being a virgin is not so bad.."

"How old are you?"

"Twenty-one?"

"Happy birthday, virgin."

"Please don't call me that."

Oliver chuckled again before he laid down next to you as he looked at you. "Sorry...it's just...I can't believe a pretty gem like you has been untouched for over twenty years- ouch!"

Yeah, you pinched his shoulder hard. He rubbed the sore place with a grin, still having a hard dick as he grinned at you. "But it's true. But how could you last this long without a dick?"

"...dildos?"

"Hehe.."

"What's so funny?", you asked. You slowly got irritated by his teasing, but then he just looked at you fondly.

"Sooo...you're a virgin, who got dragged by her best friend into a brothel, and that on your birthday, just to get laid?"

"It's not like I wanted to be here, you know..?"

Oliver sighed. 'poor thing..', then he went on top of you again. "what if we do what your best friend says then? hm?", he asked softly before he moved a strand of hair out of your face.

Your face heated up at the gentle touch Oliver gave you as you looked at his two-tones eyes. You gulped. "Promise to be gentle with me?"

Oliver huffed in amusement. "I'll try my best, sweetie.", and he was still above you, looking down on you. you looked at him for a moment, before you decided.

"Then...let's do it."

And just like that, Oliver sat up, pulled you up by your collar, held the back of your head with one, then the other hand on the small of your back as he leaned down to your level (your body was smaller than his) and softly brought his lips to yours, and you only felt a slight brush.

Then he leaned back. "How was that?"

"... What was that?", you retorted, a confused expression on your face, but still, you had a slight blush as well on it.

Oliver scoffed. "I-it was a kiss, y'know?! You wanted me to be gentle with you, and I am!"

"Y-you can be a tiny bit rougher with me...", you grumbled under your breath, and Oliver smirked.

"Well, if that's so...", he breathed before he pressed his lips down on yours in a much more passionate kiss.

Oliver flinched. You flinched as well, after he did. "wh-what?"

"Your lipstick...it tastes amazing!", he exclaimed before licking at your lips. "mmh...", he whimpered before he kissed you again.

You had to surpress giggles when you felt him eating away your cherry lipstick more than kissing you, but you let him. It felt nice...whatever he was doing.

'Gosh, why does this taste so good!? Why can't I stop!?...it's so addicting...!'

He then suddenly stopped himself. "S-sorry...", he mumbled, holding a crouched finger in front of his lips as he looked to the side with a blush. He only said sorry because he couldn't taste the lipstick anymore and he only realized then that he's been lapping at your mouth like a thirsty dog.

"It's okay.", you said with a smile. 'he's so cute..!'

and then, you scooched closer to him as you pulled away the finger from his lips as you slowly kissed him again.

Oliver didn't know why he felt like that. He felt shy, but good. He felt so...different with you than with all the other girls he's been spending time with.

Maybe it's also because of the fact that you were a virgin and Oliver didn't really know what to do. Experienced girls knew the drill. you didn't.

But, he knew that he'd let you do anything you liked, since it was your first time, so all he had to do was to relax, no?

Easer done than said. Oliver wanted you on his lap as he slowly took off your coat, shawl and beanie. He took a moment to snicker at your dishelved hair and you giggled as well before you tried to brush it neat a little.

And then, Oliver sat you on lis lap, where he rested against the headbord, and looked at you. Your heartbeat quickened when you felt something poking your clit and you forrowed your brows.

"wh-what's that?"

"An erection. Guys get hard when pretty girls like you sit on 'em.", he spoke as he tired to subtly grind up in order to get some friction. You gasped.

"i...are erections always so...big?", you asked as you shifted around to feel it some more, but you flinched when it gave you a sweet sensation.

Oliver hissed before he smirked at you through his bangs. "well...my dick's big, ...don't know about the other guys though."

You huffed in amusement. But, you turned serious again. "um...could you take these off?", you asked with a slight blush as you pulled at his pants.

Now, Oliver didn't know why he blushed, but he did. Maybe he liked the feeling of you on top of him, maybe he liked it when you grinded down on him a bit just a few moments ago...and maybe he liked getting ordered around?

He nodded. "Aynthing ya want, pretty-"

you startet to take your clothes of too, and his breath got caught in his throat. What he saw must've been the prettiest woman he's ever seen, stripping herself off of the clothes she's been wearing, becoming almost more naked than the day she was born, and Oliver never sprung out of bed just to rip off his pants so fast as well.

He panted when he whipped his head to your figure again, who just sat there in nothing but cute stockings, and a sweet lingerie set. All pastel coloured.

Oliver gulped nervously.

"So...what now?", you asked as you looked to the side. Oliver chuckled as he sat by the headbord again, and beckoned you closer. You were glad that he didn't take off his boxers...yet.

"Sit here, pretty...", he instructed to you, motioning for you to sit between his legs, with your back facing him. He grunted when you 'corrected' your seat before his dick, intentionally rubbing your ass against his hard groin as he took in a sharp breath.

"S-slowly, baby...", he gasped before you finally settled down.

You looked back to him. "Are you okay?"

He nodded quickly before he kissed your cheek and whispered for you to spread your legs. As you widened them, Oliver kissed you along your neck, and his warm fingers ghosting over your cold skin, brushing against your knees, thighs and belly softly, sending shivers around your body and you flinched a little.

"Are you okay, doll?", Oliver asked this time as he nibbled at your ear a little, his hands moving up to grope at your tits a bit. You took a deep breath.

It all felt foreign. You being here, nearly stripped off of all your clothes, with a man in his briefs sitting behind you with his boner pressing agains your rear, and letting him grope you.

You sighed dreamily.

It could be that your first time wasn't really what you expected-

"Ah!", you yelped, closing your thighs reflexively when you felt Oliver's right pointy and index finger prod and rub your clit through the fabric slowly. He stopped.

"Sorry..!", he said, and tried to take his hand away from yours, but you held it in place. "wait..d-do it again..I was just thinking of something else for a moment..", you mumbled as you gently pushed his fingers against your bud, enjoying the feeling of a man's touch for the first time.

Oliver blushed a little when he felt your tiny hand grab his and push his digits against your pussy. He realized now that he was falling for you. He looked up at the ceiling as he closed his eyes.

'dammit...falling for a customer..?!', he thought as he slowly circled his middle finger around your bud, applying pressure here and there, feeling you writhe under his touch as you press your back towards him and your breathing quickened as it also got heavier.

It felt good. Very good. Not even half as fast as your cheap vibrator, but still good. His fingers felt nice against your bundle of nerves and you gently rocked your hips against his palms as he massaged your sensitive area.

"mmh...feels good...", you moaned slightly, accompanied by a soft sigh, and Oliver kissed you again. He somehow loved kissing you more than wanting to fuck you.

Was it because he was falling for you? Even though he didn't even know your name? Was it because of your sweet vanilla scent? Your smaller frame against his as your butt which got harrassed by his hips as he humped you subtly? Or was it because he could take things easy for once?

Where he could do as he pleased, and not being bossed around so much. I mean, sure, you ordered his hand to stay where it was and for him to rub your clit, but he didn't mind it. He found it cute how you caught his hand between your thighs to keep it where it rested. He found it cute how your hand held his thigh, right above his knee as your other hand was above Oliver's hand which was pressed against your pussy, wanting to feel some more friction.

He found your sweet moans and sighs cute, where he could kiss you however he wanted. Where he could hug you tightly to him, and where you didn't mind.

He loved having the freedom to take your virginity, but he loved the idea of acting as your lover even more. He loved the idea of acting as your boyfriend, hell, he'd even become your husband if you'd say yes.

He didn't know why, but he wanted to please you in other ways and not just sex. He wanted to make you pancakes, take you out on sweet dates, and make you smile.

Damn, he fell for you, even though you guys only knew each other for an hour.

"yeah? want me to take it a step...deeper?", he whispered as he kissed your temple, and you nodded with a smile.

you heard the slapping noises again, but you didn't pay them any mind as Oliver pushed a finger into your vagina, and you whimpered. Meanwhile, Oliver's mouth stood agape as he struggled pushing his middle finger deeper into your core, and he didn't even put in half of it.

He couldn't even imagine fow his dick was supposed to fit inside that sweet pussy of yours. He groaned.

"S-sorry..", you started, wanting to apologize in embarrassment upon him feeling your tight entrance, but you only felt and heard a breathy chuckle.

"Don't you dare apologize, doll,", he said, one hand grabbing from under your thigh and pushing it up as he pushed his finger deeper inside upon the new angle, and you arched your back in response.

"mmnnh!"

Oliver giggled. Yes, he fucking giggled. "Gosh, you're too cute...and innocent...fuck...!"

And he then pulled out his slick-coated finger before he pushed it back in. The feeling was weird, having something warm go in and outside of you, and it even curling around.

None of your dildos worked like that.

____.exe has stopped working.

You moaned when he did it a few times, growing accustomed to the feeling of his finger in your core, and Oliver smiled. "Feels good?"

"Yes..", you breathed heartily. Oliver blushed, and sped up a little more, making your breath hitch. He slowly added a second finger, and you let your head fall back.

'This feels so good..I feel so full...!', you thought as you closed your eyes in bliss. Oliver used the moment to lean down and lick a stripe up your neck, making you shiver.

"damn...yer making me wanna quit..", he mumbled, but you still heard it.

"h-huh?", you asked as you tried to pay more attention to him and not his nice fingers, who were pumping into you at this point.

"Lemme quit my job for ya...", he said a little more loudly as his thumb caressed your clit again, but this time a little more with aggression, and applying more pressure as he sped up.

You moaned loudly. "Ah...O-oliver..!"

you felt flattered, even in the midst of this type of affection. You felt flattered that his words were sounding so sincere.

But you had your worries and concerns. Your best friend told you about all the guys she'd encountered as she had been in countless relationships. And she told you that boys would tell you anything as long as you stayed together with them.

Oliver just kept going faster and faster, circling around your bud as his hand nearly made slapping noises against your pussy, and your face got hot as you listened to the sound.

"Wanna make you mine...wanna...make you smile...", he muttered as he sped up more and more, listening to your voice which raised octave for octave, and he laid his head on your shoulder.

"I think i fell in love with you, even though I don't know your name."

Shit, you could have just come from that.

He suddenly stopped and took out his hand from your core, leaving you panting, and stolen off of your high. He took the fingers which were inside of you into his mouth, motioning for you to look down to him as he licked and sucked at his fingers in bliss, moaning at the sweet taste and fluttering eyes closing shut as he blushed.

But, you flushed in embarrassment. "wh-why did you do that? You could've just wiped them on the sheets, you know?", you said softly as you kept stealing glances at his blissed out face as he still licked at his lips, wanting to take whatever was left from your fluid from his palms.

When he only tasted his own saliva and not your sweetness anymore, he took out his fingers. "Why do that? You just became my favourite meal. And one shouldn't throw away a meal like that.", he answered with a pout as he stood up to take off his boxers.

"you know? there's a saying. My coach told me this by the way when he taught me how to eat out a lady..."eating out a woman is the same as eating something oily or juicy. For example you're eating a hamburger, and you still have some crumbs, or salad or cheese or something on your palms. You wouldn't take the napkin first, would you? It would be a waste. Just how the hamburger was a blessing, food to be cherished, what is left and still visible on the fingers is a blessing too. This is why you should always lick it away before using a napkin." And that's why I always lick away the essence, and not wipe them.", Oliver explained as he took of his boxers.

"Did your coach...always compare women to food?", you asked, half curious and half jealous of the realization that you were in a brothel with a man who had most likely gone down on countless women.

"Well, food tastes good, and women do too, so I don't really see the difference. But you...", he trailed off, smirking proudly as you ogled at his schlong with wide eyes, and thus boosting his ego, as he sat down again.

"you taste sweeter than honey, doll."

"_-____."

There was a moment of silence as he registered your answer. ____. Heh, what a pretty name. However, his heartbeat pounded against his ripcage so hard that he feared it might burst.

Normally, he wouldn't ask for a stranger's name. And if they told them, he still would call them petnames.

Normally, he couldn't even give two shits about his customers, he just wanted a nice fucking session and gain some money.

Normally, his heart wouldn't act out like that.

Normally.

It seemed like you were an exception.

It seemed like his heart found a new reason to work.

It seemed like he didn't wanna do this filthy job anymore.

It seemed like you were comfortable with him, trusting him as you gave your name price.

And oh, what a price it was.

Oliver would be packing his things tonight and just follow you home, because the brothel's been his home for the longest time.

Sure, he'd miss Blue Lock, mostly because of his friends and the money, but that was about it.

Yeah, Oliver would ask to move in to your apartment.

...if you had other feelings than lust for him.

...he hoped you did.

"____...", he breathed out. If came so naturally off his tongue, and he fell in love with the name as he looked at you with a smile.

A genuine smile. Not the one he'd show anyone else.

He had a sweet smile.

You averted your eyes as your cheeks burned. 'ahh he's so pretty! And I love how my name sounds from his voice!!!'

Then, he took a condom out of his drawer and gave you a show of putting it on his dick. Your eyes widened in lust and wonder as you watched him pull the gummy down his dick, and he just had to do it very slowly as he watched you stare.

He felt shy and nervous all of a sudden.

Oliver quickly leaned forward to take your hand as he gently pulled you towards him, making you walk on your knees until his dick rested under your pussy.

"Are..you sure that... this ...will fit?", you asked with a nervous smile as you looked at the size of his dick.

He was certainly bigger than any dildo you've ever had.

"hm...there's only one way to find out.", he answered as he looked up at you with a closed eyed smile, and if the tension wouldn't be so damn sexual, you would've slapped him.

But you felt like caressing his cheek now. You still held his hand as you gulped. "Well...y-you were fingering me before, right?", you asked with a stutter, but Oliver didn't pay it any mind as he started kissing your chest and collarbone.

"Yes, I did. We can also not do anything at all, ____."

You looked at him for a moment. Then your hand came in contact with his cheek. His eyes widened. He then pressed the side of his face into your hand and nuzzled himself against it.

It felt like you two knew each other for a long time, like you weren't strangers. Oliver had never experienced a touch like...that.

He never got touched so softly, and when you looked at him with such a gentle smile, and treated him like he was the most expensive thing in the world...

"Oh, Oliver, my love!", you exclaimed as you hugged him. You embraced him the moment you saw his right eye suddenly collecting more water, and you grew panicked.

"Did I do something wrong? Am I not allowed to touch workers? Please my love, answer me...!", you said in a hushed whisper as Oliver slowly brought his arms to your back and hugged you as well.

His shoulders were shaking as he sniffed and sobbed. "N-no...I just..I love you!", he cried and you just hugged him tighter.

It took him a few seconds to collect his thoughts, to let loose, to calm down. Oliver felt...safe, in your arms. He was surprised when you suddenly embraced him, as if you were protecting him, and maybe that was what he needed.

Maybe he just needed to breathe a bit. Yeah. That was it. Catch a break from this place.

He hugged you a little tighter and you reciprocated the gesture. Oliver sighed contently. That sweet moment however, got ruined when your knees couldn't support the weight of Oliver -who was laying on your chest with his whole upper body- anymore, and you had to sit down.

It was a wonder, truly.

Your pussy sucked his dick inside in one go, without any difficulties as you gasped sharply and Oliver moaned shamelessly. Oliver cursed under his breath as he massaged your sides, trying to tell you sweet nothings as he tried to refrain from thrusting up his dick.

your breath was ragged as you tried to process how in the world you could've taken such a huge cock like Oliver's in, let alone so...easily.

But, you also felt more full than you ever did, none of your dildos were that good. Gosh, Oliver might get you addicted to his own dick if you didn't hop off anytime soon.

"mmh...c-can I move?", you asked after a few minutes, and Oliver looked at you in confused amazement. He was underneath you, panting as he tried to get accustomed to the tightest cunt he's ever had the pleasure of getting inside, and here you were, all ready to ride him.

Oliver nodded as he closed his eyes. "Lift your hips- s-slow--ah~!", he instructed, but you lifted them too fast and Oliver's shaft was robbed from your warm walls as you raised yourself, sucking him a little up and he shivered when he felt the cool night air from the slightly opened window hit against his wet cock.

You hissed in frustration when you didn't feel his thick dick fill you up and you let yourself down again, but this time much slower, and you moaned out in bliss. Oliver did as well, and he looked at the place where your entrance took in more and more of him.

His heart started hurting. "Yes..j-just like that..!", he breathed as he felt you rise again. your eyes were closed in concentration of Oliver's breathing, his twitching dick, his hands holding your hips to guide you around on his cock and the lewd noises both of your genitals did.

Gosh, it felt so right to ride him. It felt good. His hands felt good. His cologne was the only air you've wanted to breathe ever again. His face and body and dick were the only things you ever wanted to see again. His voice was the only sound you ever wanted to hear again.

Was it possible...that you fell for Oliver too?

...Was it possible to kidnap him?

I mean, you could disguise your doings as a form of wanting to get to know him better, and later on use him as your personal dildo or plaything, but we'll see about that.

Right now, you went down again, and Oliver's legs trembled a little. You noticed of course and stopped your ministrations. "What's wrong?", you asked with an innocent face, your brows frowning in concern and your wide eyes searching for any discomfort in his face.

The fucking audacity you had.

Oliver was seconds away from cumming!

He just wanted to kiss you in order to shut you up -french-kiss you, to be precise- and force his tongue down your throat until you couldn't think anymore and fuck you senseless.

But he just shook his head. "No, it's just... I'm close...", he sighed, dissappointed in himself. But could you blame him? He's had a painful boner the moment you stepped into this room.

You giggled. "So...I'm making you cum? Does it feel good? want me to change the pace?", you asked in an excited tone, and Oliver was left in amazement at your behavior for the nth time tonight.

what were you, exactly?

"Do you like the idea of me cumming so bad, ____?", he mused, wanting to see you blush, but his eyes widened when you nodded happily.

"I can finally brag about my friend that i made a man and myself cum! Then she'll for sure leave me alone!", you cheered, and Oliver grew depressed.

"Oh...is this...like, the only reason you're here? Just because of your friend?", he asked, making you stop altogether.

You grabbed his cheeks and gave him a big smooch. "Listen, Oliver. I came here with the intention to just get fucked around a little and then leave, but you make me want to stay by your side and love you.

And you know...about what you said earlier...

...I think I fell for you too.", you chuckled as you smiled at him fondly.

Oliver's eyes stared at yours for a moment before he pulled you to him and kissed you a hundred times. You giggled when he peppered your face in sloppy kisses, pecks, and kitten licks, but you wouldn't want to have it any other way.

You let him do as he pleased, letting him trail down your body with kisses, biting your neck gently, nibbling your collarbone, and his thumbs rounding your nipples as if they were these joints from a playstation controller, making you whimper a bit.

You sighed happily as he pushed you down, making him go on top of you again, and you laying on the sheets, his dick still inside you and you gently rocked your hips against his to gain some friction.

"Really?", he asked as he tried catching his breath. You nodded with a smile. "Really."

Oliver smiled back. "Good...now, let me make love to you, ____."

You giggled and Oliver kissed your nose with a grin before he held one of your hands and kissed it gently. You looked up at him with heart eyes.

Oliver blushed furiously as he kissed your lips and thrusted into you at the same time. You moaned against his lips as you felt your stomach forming a knot, with Oliver repeatedly hitting a certain spot inside you which made your eyes roll back and your toes curl.

You arched your back at the feeling, your clit pulsing in a strong rythm and Oliver kissed you again and again as he kept thrusting into you.

"mm...nngh~...y're s'good t'this...", you mumbled, already losing yourself in the feeling of his dick filling you up and massaging your walls with his veins and girth as you tried meeting his snaps.

Oliver gritted his teeth as he tried not to cum at the moment. He didn't know what was more hot; being inside of you, or seeing your blissed out face, with your body moving upwards a bit at every of his hips' movements.

He groaned before he buried his head into your shoulder and adjusted his legs for a moment, where you caressed the back of his hand with your thumb as you waited patiently and combed through his hair in a comforting manner with your other one.

Then, Oliver snapped his hips into yours, his dick drilling into you at a fast pace as you gasped at the sudden change and reflexively pulled at his hair, making him hiss in pain and pleasure.

"Does, ah..does this also feel good..!?", he grunted as he felt tears stream down his face at the feeling of pleasure and pain, because he tried not to cum, and it hurt, a lot.

"Yes...but please, Oliver. Cum."

Oliver's breath got caught in his throat as his cock just started to let out the pent up and held back white spurts of semen inside the condom, but it felt like he was cumming inside of you, which made him scared.

So, he quickly pulled his dick out, relieved as he realized he was still wearing a condom and sighed.

He still had to overcome the fact that his body reacted upon your request, cumming when you told him to. He felt like he could've held it in for five more minutes, but you proved him otherwise.

"How...how did you know I wanted to cum?", he asked in bewilderment when he hugged you close to him. You caressed his torso after you pulled the condom out of his now-soft penis.

"I read a lot of books."

"Oh...b-but you didn't cum...!"

"There's always a next time, Oliver."

And Oliver looked at you with a surprised face. Why was he so forgetful today?

You had a smile on your face when you held one of his hands and kissed it. "It was a perfect first time."

"But you didn't cum.."

"I didn't want to in the first place. I just...wanted to know what it feels like, being touched by a man, making love to a man...and, well, experiencing something like that. I'm glad I went with my friend."

"hm, me too. But was it a...good first time?", he asked as he played with a few strands of your hair. You huffed in amusement.

"I couldn't imagine a better first time, Oliver.", you confessed, and Oliver had a precious smile on his face as he looked at you.

...

"So...I was thinking...maybe...just maybe! I could...move into your apartment?", he asked, already having packed his things as he followed you.

Your best friend stared at you with an open mouth, who looked at him with a smile. "I'd love to! But, I must warn you, I don't really cook or clean around the house, so I might need a-"

"Maid? Cook? I can totally do that.", he answered quickly and with a determined expression on his face.

"Hey...are we maybe skipping a few steps here?", your best friend chimed in as she raised her eyebrow.

"Huh? Uh, no? I love him. He's just my type, and he also took my virginity. And apparently, he says he can do house chores and cook meals. So why not live together?", you answered as you looked at her.

She scratched her head. "Damn. Once I bring you out, and bam, now you have a husband. Jeez, ya need to teach me your ways, ____!!!", she yelled, and you giggled at her desperation.

Then you bid her goodbye as your Uber came and you stepped in with Oliver. The ride was silent as you snuggled up against him and he kissed the top of your head.

---

hellyu, how was that?!

If it wasn't what you wanted then I'm sorry, but I don't wanna rewrite it again. However, please write feedback in the comments, alright?

Read you in the next post!

[afniel]

Hey so this came up talking to my buddies who are in charge of hiring at their workplace yesterday, and I know taking Advice About Employment from someone who hasn't been employed in mumble mumble years is on its face a little stupid-sounding, but if you're at the interview stage and you've heard that you should ask questions but you're not sure what and also you're sure you're going to be nervous:

Interview the interviewer.

Seriously. The more you can shift your mindset from, "oh gods if I can't get this paycheck I don't know what I'll do," to, "I might not even want this job, but I'm going to interview this person and find out if it's right for me," the better. And obviously you still do need the paycheck and you might still take a job you don't want, but your confidence in the interview will skyrocket if you can pull this mental switch on yourself.

Take notes throughout. No, really, bring paper or a notebook and something nice to write with, and jot things down. If they raise an eyebrow (they shouldn't!) just tell them you're making notes on what you want to double back and ask them about. This shows you're an engaged listener and also polite enough to not interrupt, but firm enough to not let questions slide entirely.

When you get to the end and they ask you if you have any questions, this is where you ask them about workplace culture and their own job and performance. What's it like working there? How is onboarding handled? How is communication handled? If it's a shift job, what's the procedure for finding coverage? Is there room to advance? Do they promote from within? Most of the questions they ask you about past jobs are fair game for you to ask them about their current job too, like: What challenges do they face at work? Daily? Monthly? Long-term? What do they enjoy about the workplace? What would they change about it? Depending on the type of work you can ask them about what kinds of projects, cases, clients, etc. are typical and have they had any atypical ones, and how were those handled?

Seriously, the more you ask from the point of view that the interview is a fully equitable, two-way process, the better. Obviously in many ways it's not, but again, this isn't about the reality, this is about Performing Confidence. They want to see if you're a good fit for them, and vice versa, you want to see if they're a good fit for you.

Again, yes, I haven't been employed for...timespan that I'd actually have to do math on. Despite being an introverted weirdo with a not very impressive CV, though, the last time I had a job, I beat 250+ applicants for a job that I had no real prior experience in, mainly on the strength of my interview, which I basically treated like a fun little jaunt up to San Francisco to see if this was a place that I felt like working. Not in a flippant way, but still. I don't remember being stressed at all. I mostly remember getting lunch afterwards and it was soup in a sourdough bread bowl. Did I have nerves? Eh! Probably! Dunno! I mostly had broccoli cheddar soup and a job offer after a few more days.

Like yes there's no magical way to guarantee success at any given interview, but I have a surprising number of friends who handle interviewing and hiring and they are always praying for people who can do this in an interview. This is as close to a silver bullet as you can get. Being engaged and asking questions is THEE ONE THING they most want in interviewees but they very rarely get it.

So yeah fake it 'til you make it, but fake it in a very specific way where actually you're interviewing them to see if their job offer would be a good fit for you, not the other way around. You can, in fact, say, "I don't think this place will be a good fit for me at this moment, but thank you so much for your time." Yeah, you probably won't, but the point is that it's a real option and remembering that is empowering. Shift the focus of power in the process, even if it's just in your own mind, because I guarantee it's not just in your own mind if you can do it.

[variousqueerthings]

No blowing up the planet!

it's.... Nightmare In Silver!!! the second of the neil gaiman penned episodes, and I've gotta be honest, the only thing I'm really vibing with this time around is Warwick Davis, unfortunately, because I'd want to watch it again for Warwick Davis, youknow?

sexism rank objectification (female character is ogled/harassed/turned into a sex joke by the doctor and/or a lead we’re supposed to root for and/or the camera): 4/10

sexism rank plot-point (lead female character is only there to serve plot, not to have her emotional interiority explored, or given agency to her emotional interiority): 3/10

interesting complex or pointlessly complex (does the complexity serve the narrative or does it just serve to be confusing as a stand-in for smart, this includes visually): 4/10

furthers character and/or lore and/or plot development (broader question that ties into the previous ones, at least two of these, ideally three should be fulfilled): 4/10

companion matters (the companion doesn’t always have to be there, but if the companion is there, can they function without the doctor– and overall per season how often is the companion the focus or POV of the story): 6/10

the doctor is more than just “godlike” (examines the doctor’s flaws and limitations, doesn’t solve a plot by having it revolve entirely around the doctor’s existence): 4/10

doesn’t look down on previous doctor who (by erasing or mocking its importance, by redoing and “bettering” previous beloved plotpoints or characters, etc.): 8/10

isn’t trying to insert hamfisted sexiness (m*ffat famously talked a lot about how dw should be sexier multiple times, he sucks at writing it): 8/10

internal world has consistency (characters have backgrounds, feel rooted in a place with other people, generally feel like they have Lives): 4/10

Politics (how conservative is the story): 5/10

FULL RATING: 50/100 (if I can count….)

it's not so much that it's the worst episode of ever, it's more that it's spreading itself way too thin. And then of course. we get the second most infamous fucking terrible line in Eleven's run:

OBJECTIFICATION: "A mystery rapped inside of an enigma squeezed into a skirt that’s just a bit too… tight."

I am just hoping that Neilman didn't write this line, because it scans as pure M*ffat at his worst, but who knows. this is the Doctor about Clara, and look, not that it should even matter, because it's a heinous line that shouldn't exist, but it also doesn't make sense, because Clara's skirts may be relatively short, but they're cut in a sort of almost 50s flare (I don't know skirt cutting terminology)

and I hate that that's even a point I have to make in this, why do I have to think about the tightness of Clara's skirts fuck you fuck you fuck you!

this is genuinely the only thing, but it comes outta fucking nowhere slaps you in the face and then leaves you with "ah, thank you for summing up the only things that matte about your lead character in one, hypersexist sentence." which... speaking of the first half of that sentence

PLOT-POINT: I've been praising Clara's competency in most of her episodes. she's proactive, she does things even though she's scared, she knows number one rule is Not Dying.... in this episode she's got none of the depth that comes with the things she does

suddenly, she is just In Charge Of Soldiers, and she's practically a different character. gone are emotional tie-ins to what she's doing, in fact she mostly seems to be having fun and/or being very happy to be put in charge of this particular military, with the exception of a second when they're almost killed by Cybermen

I did write initially that I liked her taking charge in this one too, but as the episode went on, she felt more like she was just there to run the B-plot, than to be important. I also wrote down this line "The only reason I’m still alive is because I do what the Doctor says"

honestly I'd have to go back and see if rtd-era companions have these sorts of lines, but also my girl-guy, he's asking you to run first line of defense against Cybermen, it's not that you're not being put in danger. this is the sort of line I'd have expected from Amy, but I think Clara's been remarkably free of them up until now (I could be wrong, but from my notes!) Especially because throughout this season we've had episodes where the Doctor had no idea what to do and you saw that Clara!

this is me picking up on dialogue, because this episode... did not have good dialogue by and large, but we'll get back to that, because we're not done with "The Impossible Girl" (sigh) -- because if you didn't think she was kind of absent proper emotions before, (such as the episode breezing mostly past her reaction to seeing the kids she's taking care of being controlled by Cybermen, which, again I can sort of believe in that she hasn't met Cybermen before and so doesn't think the children are dead like previous companions might, but they're still kids she deeply cares for and apart from an initial comical anger scene, she's just moving onwards with the plot), then remember here at the end that she's not really important, she's just the mystery of the season for the Doctor to solve!

COMPLEXITY: this episode has so many setpieces. there was a war 1000 years ago vs Cybermen that people won, and now they're on this abandoned amusement park that has a bunch of old Cybermen casings, and there's a lost emperor, except he's this guy who's been calling himself Porridge, who's the secret behind an automaton chess player (a real thing that existed in the 18th-19th century and used this exact technique), but is actually the long-missing emperor that's been searched for for awhile, I cannot remember why he was undercover as an amusement park gimmick called fucking Porridge

uh and then the Cybermen start waking up, because the Doctor brought children here and they needed children and I cannot remember why, and they cannot blow up the planet, until they've saved the children, and the Doctor is infected, but plays a chessgame against his evil Cyberself (called Mr Clever, because everything in this era has to be weirdly Silly all the time), while the others fight the Cybermen in an abandoned "comical castle" because it's still a theme park and most of them die, the Doctor convinces the evil!self to release the children and then promptly fries him out of his brain, because why wouldn't he do that???

and all the survivors beam up to the emperor's big ship and blow up the planet. I have a lot of questions. why a themepark (did they explain that, I somehow must have missed it), why is the emperor missing (did they explain that, I somehow must have missed it) why is he pretending to be this guy called Porridge? (did they explain that, I somehow must have missed it) why tf is he missing if he's so easily recognisable that a child would get it?? (did they explain that, I somehow must have missed it) why did the cybermen need children? (did they explain that, I somehow must have missed it) why was the amusement park abandoned and then stationed with troops? (did they explain that, I somehow must have missed it)

so like. there maybe are explanations for all of these points, but my point is that this episode is so unwieldy that if you look away for a second you miss the potentially single piece of dialogue explaining a thing and then it's very unclear for the rest of the story. and I am Watching these episodes, taking notes, going back to read subtitles. I genuinely don't know how I missed all of that

and I like watching things that are complicated, I do. but only if it's also engaging, and this episode is not engaging enough for me to go back now and look through it (or even to possibly watch it again). it's got so much dialogue that is so out of place, tonally and structurally, there's no way I'm going in to try and focus more on it than I already did. my point isn't necessarily that the above wasn't explained, it's that it wasn't explained well, and there was a barrage of weird shit that was coming at you from all sides

CHARACTERS/LORE/PLOT: you'd think, considering evil!Doctor is inside the Doctor's mind and they're battling it out and evil!Doctor is seeing Forbidden Knowledge and also being kinda weird about the Doctor's and Clara's relationship (framing it as explicitly romantic), that there would be more forward-motion, but not really

Clara's not massively changed from the kids having been kidnapped and taken over by Cybermen, and neither are the kids for that matter. which, I don't know where to put this, but remember how back in Rings of Akhaten I was saying that there's a looooot of kids in this era, which would be great if they could act (like the kid in Akhaten), these kids are... not good actors in this episode. and they're also given (especially the girl) thankless fucking dialogue. she's meant to be giving that tween/early teen surliness, and in order to manage this 90% of her dialogue is calling things stupid. She'll enter a scene like this:

Kid: Hello I’m bored Soldier asks her where her sister (Clara) is Kid: She’s not my sister, she’s stupid

this.... is not how tweens/early teens talk, and you can feel the director going "just act huffy in Every Single Moment you're onscreen." she calls the Tardis stupid, she calls an alien planet stupid, she calls people stupid, I swear the nr one word this character says is "stupid"

point being, the kids aren't important to any forward trajectory on the whole, Clara isn't questioning the picture of herself in the last episode that she doesn't recognise so that's a bust, and the Doctor's little duel of the mind doesn't go much of anywhere

the only bit of something that may come up again is the Cyberman bit drifting around space to set up future Cybermen (shocking)

COMPANIONS MATTER: she does. yeah, she does take control of the soldiers. I wish it had been more awkward. why is this Clara, who was having a near panic-attack in Cold War, who was admitting to being terrified in Hide, why is she just so effortlessly good at this? but yeah, she does do Plot Things so to speak

I'm also not 100% convinced the Doctor would leave his companion -- especially this companion, whom he is trying not to get killed for the third time - at the front lines battling Cybermen, that's truly a last resort kind of situation that seems very chill here

“GODLIKE” DOCTOR: aaaand so we get to the A-Plot, which is an admittedly cool little setting in the Doctor's mind where the Gallifreyan cogs whirl around (I wonder if there's easter eggs in there)

and of course, really it's a way to "trick" the evil!Doctor into letting the kids go, so he can say fuck it to the chessgame and just electric him out of his mind, and that's exactly what happens

it's fine-ish, I've marked it down because it totally overshadows the plot where Clara is in charge of scared soldiers, which matters far less, and shouldn't! and also because... I'm circling around saying there's a lot of this dialogue that doesn't work for me either, and that I don't think Matt Smith is the best actor for it

I've enjoyed Matt Smith in this era, more than I thought I would. there are some things he does very well (cry-face is solid, rapid speech patterns without it getting jumbled, annoyance, lotta bodily flailing although I think directors overuse that to the point of my not taking him seriously at all quite often), where I think he often loses me is the Dramatic Time Lord Stuff. the quiet competency and rage, the shouting grand speeches, all of that... never worked for me, didn't work this time either, and the whole episode hinges on it a bit

it didn't help that evil!Doctor called himself "Mr Clever," it's one of those things that happens a lot in this era where the balance of lighthearted-for-"kids" (in the sense that you can see the screen screaming for children to think this is funny/whimsical/etc) and take-this-seriously-in-the-timetravel-show-please is see-sawing like mad. often just a lot little things, like that. it's like someone grabbing you by the face and yelling WHIMSY!!!!!! at you, rather than whimsy coming from the construction of the story

but yeah evil!Doctor is kind of sneering I guess. I think there's just more that could have been done with this concept, but like everything else it's stretched Thin

PREVIOUS DOCTOR WHO: so apparently these Cybermen reference a bunch of Classic cybermen, along with the ones developed during RTD's era. that's cool. also a few references to other Doctor's, especially Ten, with Allonsy and

"You've had some cowboys in here, ten complete rejigs"

“SEXINESS”: we are pretty solid on this on the whole. thank goodness. I do wonder about the emperor asking Clara to marry him, but I'll save the emperor as concept for last

INTERNAL WORLD: yeah, back to complexity, nonsense from top to bottom. I guess it's built like a theme park, in that there is a theme park map. I'm just realising this is set at a theme park and we see four locations -- the bit where they land on the "fake moon," and do some fake moon jumping. the soldiers barracks. the little room kept by the con-man carnival type. and the "comical" castle. why set this at a theme park if you're not showing any... theme park?

POLITICS: this episode is devoid of politics, except we've got this platoon and we've got this emperor of several worlds, and none of it has any bearing on the episode, because we're not meant to think about these sorts of things. the platoon is kind of the dredges, and so several of them are immediately killed by Cybermen, which would be gruesome if one cared about them, but the episode has so much going on that there's not enough time to focus in properly

but also were they drafted? did they volunteer? can they quit? who's their families, their planets? what made them join up if they did join up? why do they care about the emperor, what is that loyalty made up of? propaganda? why does the emperor matter? what is the suggestion that the word "emperor" makes spring to mind?

it's sort of framed like a budget LOTR with a return of the king, except his spaceship was orbiting the planet the whole time. I still don't know what he was doing there, or why they didn't just evacuate and blow it up earlier, and I'm saying this, but also is there more at stake when "blowing up a planet" who lived there? what culture is lost? how does it tie into the idea that an emperor can just blow up a planet?

he's presented as a benevolent, brave person, who's fine with Clara turning down his hand in marriage, but truthfully we know nothing about him at all, and actually a story about that would have been more interesting to me. what are the connotations of it all???

FULL RATING: 50/100 (if I can count….)

a thin thin episode with too much happening, too many characters, highly suspect dialogue, much of which was out of character, and a setting that's cool on the surface and then totally unexplored, because it too, is just there to be Cool rather than to have any deeper bearing on things

it's got some nice callbacks to classic!who and Warwick Davis, that's... most of what it's got going for it, unfortunately

and then that fucking line!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[fayesdiary]

DW ME AND THE RANDOM NUMBER GENERATOR GOTCHU

4, 8, 11, 31, 32

THANK YOU 4) What did you name Sommie your first playthrough?

I kept Sommie as the name! I always prefer to use the official names whenever given the chance, especially on the first playthrough.

8) Have you gotten any S-rank bond rings not through melding?

I did! Silque and Nanna, and I think there was also another one I don't remember.

11) Who is your least favorite royal?

Prrrobably Alcryst.

Don't get me wrong, I really like him actually, just with a few reservations.

Mainly that when his self-loathing is overblown and played for laughs it makes me uncomfortable because I've been there before. Hell, I still have my occasional episodes from time to time and they're not fun. At all.

But I loved his supports that focus on other aspects of his character (seriously I got his support with Céline first and it's the GOAT), also he's so fun to use as a unit! I gave him Lyn, Lunar Brace and Draconic Hex so often he could just delete a boss' HP bar while debuffing them in the process. Seriously, he's so busted.

31) Are there any easter egg-esque details in the game that you really like?

The occasional Smash references (especially Ike's) are so funny😂

32) Was there anything you disliked in the game, whether it came to gameplay or story, from a major dislike to a minor nitpick?

Engage's storytelling, quite frankly, sucks ass.

I don't mean the story itself, just the way it's told because oh my god, if it weren't for the music and especially the voice actors pulling their A-Game, it would fall so spectacularly flat.

I'm mainly talking about the in-game cutscenes. While the prerendered ones look pretty good the in-game ones just look so. Unbelievably. Boring.

It's just everyone standing around talking with the same stock animations, the same camera movements, barely anything dynamic with most of the interesting stuff "offscreen" or through portraits.

If you want a clear example of what I'm talking about, Griss at the end of Chapter 20. In the prerendered cutscene he's moving all over the place, shambling around and laughing maniacally.

In the following in-game cutscene he's just standing still and he looks like he's having a polite conversation with Alear and their gang which is very much. NOT what they were going for. See what I mean?

Or everything about the Ch24 cutscenes (which should have been prerendered to give them the emotional weight they deserved btw, but that's not the point)

I'm not saying every cutscene should be prerendered. I'm saying the ingame cutscenes should have better directing than an early 3D title.

[aajjks]

tattoos, eyebrow, lip, and TONGUE PIERCING?!! 🤤

BC!JK

you knew it. you knew he would sit next to you but part of you was hoping he wouldn’t notice your presence and would sit with someone else but here you are.

at first you don’t say much. you contemplate even helping your bully because he called you ugly, burnt you diary without apologizing, and even now he’s making fun of you by calling you a nerd and loser. why should you help this piece of shit?

you sigh. “we’re on this page” you point with your pencil and open the textbook but the next thing that comes from jungkook’s mouth leaves you disgusted. your mouth? he would know so much about mouths since he’s “been around.”

yeah, jungkook’s reputation isn’t the cleanest. he’s fucked around like any other and was the kind of guy good girls loved to have in their beds and to some, he obliged. it was gross to you because he probably takes pride in fucking around and is probably thinking he’ll get some from you.

never. never in life or any lifetime ever.

despite your repulsion, you try to get jungkook up to date with the new topic of the week being production in art. you show him your notes and explain the important points of the textbook and what you’ve written down.

you know jungkook isn’t paying attention to you and his eyes looked to be more focused on your face and growing red cheeks from his intense focus on you. you wish you could just tell him to pay attention and quit gawking at you but you’re nervous.

indeed you are shy. you’re like a mouse when all eyes are on you and before danielle, you always walked with your head down and sat alone. i mean, you still do but it’s not as bad as it used to be.

you go on and on and jungkook rudely interrupts you and asks for your number. finally, you look up and make eye contact with him. sure you glance everywhere so he doesn’t stare into your soul but you’re looking at him, somewhat.

“m-my number?” you whisper “no way. you bully me, make fun of me, call me ugly, and you burnt my journal” you say meekly while twirling your pencil in your hand.

even when you’re “fussing” at him, you’re still shy. you’re still a meek little mouse and it’s hard for jungkook to take you seriously when you look so cute? in his eyes, you’re surprisingly really cute and you’re so smart.

“go ask another loser for their number because i’m not gonna give you mine”

can this class let out already? you’re tired of his presence and you won’t let his pretty-boy charms distract you from your real love. at least eunwoo doesn’t call you ugly, well, you guys barely talk but you get the point!

you can’t even see yourself being friends with an asshole like him and you never will be.

Even your rejection is so polite. 

He doesn’t mind this, you’re just so fun to talk with and tease. Jungkook scoffs and just leans his face closer to yours and he is so glad that he did this because the way your eyes widen and and you gasping in surprise has his heart beating so loud.

“If you won’t give me your number I’ll make sure to put all the blame on you so that the Professor won’t give you any extra credit- it will be because of you that I don’t catch up.” He shrugs.

You are a nerd, in the cutest way possible and he knows how important it is for you to have extra credit on your academic records. “So… just give me it.” He is playing the with his tongue piercing because he knows that you take some time to reply to him.

“Come on, little lamb.” He rolls his eyes, “I’ll text you or even better.. call you tonight.” He is looking straight into your eyes. “You will narrate all of this to me.” And with that he’s back to the side of his table again.

“Ha. Fix your glasses.” He points out.

You are annoyingly cute.

“Class, focus because I’m about to give you an essay. Write one on the importance of production.. and whoever will do the best. I’ll make sure to include it in the competition that’s gonna take place in a few days and it’s got a huge scope- so opportunities will come knocking.”

Jungkook watches you as he notices the way you bite your lower lip, you’re so focused on the information the teacher gave just now.

“ you can win.” He suddenly says. “You’ll probably take the first place.” of course he believes in you, because you are one of the most intelligent people in the school.

And he’s not exaggerating, of course.

“In 2 weeks. You can turn your essays in, so take your time and do your best.

“just use your nerdy little brain and charm.” of course you’re so lucky because he’s giving you his exclusive advice.

And before you can respond, the bell rings, and it’s of course his favorite time.

“Okey bye bye little lamb, I’ll visit you after school and you better give me your number.” He’s picking up his bag and woosh he’s out, but not before winking at you.

[the1975attheirverybest]

In this case it's not about pockets exactly... Taylor is on a big tour right now, with a lot of people and a lot of eyes on it, if she says something political, no matter the side she takes, it can put her and everyone that goes to her concerts in great danger...

A lot of people when they're talking about that scene in Miss American where she's telling her team that she's gonna support the Democrats and she's gonna make a post about it, people focus on the guy on her team that says "do you want to cut your audience in half?" and she replies with she doesn't care about it, but in that scene, her dad also says, "I don't want you to do this because I care for your security". Taylor carries QuikClot army grade bandage dressing all the time, which is for gunshot or stab wounds, she's the most popular person in the world and concerts are very exposed places... She can't risk people's lives like this..

To me, that’s exactly the narrative that she wants you to buy into. This is disregarding her privilege and believing the simplistic black and white view point that she’s always pushing.

So, she’s asking herself should I, a millionaire (billionaire?) who currently has more money than she can spend in a few lifetimes risk not making even more money for the sake of speaking out about a literal nation because being wiped out in front of my eyes? Her answer has been “ong my money my audience.” Which tells me she cares about herself, her image, her wealth, her continued status as number one artist, but human rights? No she doesn’t give a fuck.

[fagsaporta]

just thinking about how the cobra starship music video for "i kissed a boy" (a cover of katy perry's "i kissed a girl") is set up as a parody to the book/film "girl, interrupted.” bc like... i think despite looking like it was made with 5 dollars, a tripod, and a dream, this song and mv actually have a really interesting political/social position.

i’d like to focus in this post what the mv adds to a queer interpretation of the song, but to do that we should quickly discuss the ways i’m interpreting the song itself.

on the most basic level, the listener is intended to understand that gabe saporta likes kissing other guys, and that his stated reason is that he likes causing problems, as well as because girls like it.

but i can’t help but think about this song in the context of the rest of their discography. throughout their music there this huge aspect of performative hypermasculinity. but because gabe saporta is Like That and in fact categorically not an alpha chad you get this interplay where, by doing the Straight Guy Club Song thing on the surface and having it amped up to 1000, i would argue that cobra starship is asking listeners to think abt the absurdity of the gender roles and culture they are mimicking/playing into, ie that of a cisheteronormative society. therefore one pretty straightforward reading of the song is that gabe saporta is portraying the experience of being a bisexual man who is in denial and dealing with internalised homophobia, who resorts to performative hyper-masculine heterosexuality and violence as a way to reframe his non-normative desires as something that aligns with the narratives of straight mainstream society.

i do think to some extent, given the context the song was written for (2008, right after obama won the presidency) there is also some element of the performativity of it, of doing it to piss off homophobes (who gabe saporta talks about like. being people in his audience at his shows screaming fag at him or finding him after to harass him, which is a context that in 2022 is kind of lost on us, bc it is so easy to consider homophobes this weird outgroup who would never go to a cobra starship show, but that wasn't the case then obviously) it may not be solely a nuanced depiction of bisexuality, but i do definitely believe it is not one or the other, but rather both

with this in mind, the mv adds some pretty interesting details.

except for the opening shots, gabe saporta is filmed mostly alone in a white room. this visually references the psychiatric institution which “girl, interrupted” takes place in. this in itself could serve reference being trapped within the confines of “normal” straight society. one of the themes of “girl, interrupted” is the conflation of social nonconformity with insanity. it’s not much of a leap to therefore read the mv as gabe saporta making reference to the way society enforces a very limited range of acceptable expression of sexuality and gender, and punishes anything that strays too far outside of that.

gabe saporta is also shown through closeups to have various number tattoos (both in roman numerals and in latin numbers) that could reference a patient identification code, or again the idea of being a cog in the machine of straight society

(those are the roman numerals for 69. haha nice. the gay sex number.)

the final shot also has some interesting symbolism. it's the first time you can clearly see that the tattoo on his upper back is a cross, plus the pose and the way the light forms wings around him. it’s clearly a reference to the crucifixion, although i haven’t exactly come to a firm conclusion on what that means narratively. one possibility is that gabe saporta is portraying himself as a martyr, suggesting that he is being open about having queer experiences and dealing with the homophobia that comes from that so that it is easier for other queer people to talk more easily about their experiences in the future. it might also be important that he is very openly exposing a large amount of skin. it indicates a level of sexualisation or sexuality, but also at the same time, vulnerability.

anyway. gabe saporta’s physicality and performance for the mv also strikes me as important. for most of the mv, gabe saporta is demonstrated to be in control. he is physically dominant over the other man, but his power and control are also established by the way he is very purposefully putting on a persona and performing for the camera.

not to insanely over analyse this shot by shot, but there are two notable exceptions.

for example, in this shot he is going to change his whole expression and push the other guy away in a second or two, but in the moment does absolutely not seem to be in control of the impulse to kiss him. and though he still has the power in the situation, with his hands on the other guy's face, he’s moving in almost like it is out of habit or desire, rather than a plan

and then this one.... i have less to say but look how happy they are!! gabe!! what is this!!

it’s notable that these “breaks in character” both indicate a desire for other men, but also for emotional intimacy.

there’s a lot more that could be said about the every single tiny detail of this mv (the baseball bat, the bracelets, the sungalsses) but this post is already way too long so i guess you just have to brainrot about those things first hand

[46ten]

Let’s talk about Samuel Adams, Father of the American Revolution

Stacy Schiff published an acclaimed biography last year (2022), although it’s certainly not “a revelatory biography from a Pulitzer Prize-winner about the most essential Founding Father—the one who stood behind the change in thinking that produced the American Revolution.” IOW, it’s not a work of scholarship, and I don’t recall a discussion of the “change in thinking” (what does that mean?) that Adams supposedly inspired. 

This is definitely a hagiography, but with the focus on the Nation-state builders, it’s good to see some focus on the “original” fighters for liberty. Samuel Adams, at various times, gets thrown back in the bin when it’s deemed that we shouldn’t be talking about people working to overthrow the government - see popular historian take on Lincoln masterfully shifting the focus of the American founding from the resistance fighters and revolutionary firebrands (the folks the early 19th century THOUGHT of as the Founders) to the architects of the American state, a shift that has stayed with us because it was deemed not a good to champion challenging the government (though Schiff herself is a bit all over the place about respect for Adams at the end and immediately after his lifetime). But Samuel Adams is the RIGHT kind of trouble-maker, which Schiff describes from the very beginning - “moral,” “principled, “humble.” Ah, for the day when one doesn’t need to meet the definition of a moral paragon to be acclaimed in American history. I realize I’ve just written to go read this book, and then stated that books like this are of limited value, but my point is it does have valuable information, but be aware of the undercurrents in this approach. 

Schiff’s prose is appealing, and she tells the real story of Paul Revere better than I’ve seen it anywhere, so the book may be worth it for that alone. But like all popular biographies of this type, beware the lack of context.

Petty point 1.

First, what’s with the makeover on these guys? This guy:

THIS GUY: 

Becomes THIS GUY??!!

I complained about this with Alexander Hamilton, too. 

(And I got distracted by this picture of James Watt, as he seems to be a model for some of this re-working.) 

Petty point 2.

The back author blurb is a long paragraph praising the book by Ron Chernow, so I should probably have thrown this book in the trash.  "A glorious book that is as entertaining as it is vitally important.” —Ron Chernow. Why is it vitally important? I still don’t know. 

Real point 3. 

Adams deliberately destroyed a lot of his correspondence - folks really did want to kill him and issued posters with a ransom so that the Tories could hang him, and took to the grave the stories of lots of events about the American revolution, “Dryly he noted that some individuals enjoyed every political gift except that of discretion.” 

Petty point 4. 

The hardcover has deckled pages, which makes it really hard to find the picture sections (it has two). 

Petty point 5.

To avoid citing in-text, Schiff’s end notes reference the phrase and then provides the citation. While I understand stylists like to do this for readability of non-fiction for a general audience, it also makes it hard to determine an actual fact/reference from stuff the author just pulled out of their ass. I don’t want to flip back and forth to figure out whether you’re making something up. 

Real point 6. 

Not petty, but grim. I’m about to delve into women and maternity again, so these numbers recall the 17th century admonishment to women that with pregnancy, death awaits you. Elizabeth Checkley, Adams’s first wife, gave birth to six children, of whom only two survived past the age of 2. She likely died of complications from her last childbirth. She was the tenth child that predeceased her own father. Adams had 11 siblings, of whom only three survived their own father. 

Petty point 7.

Every description and scene with John Hancock is petty. “The pomp and retinue of an Eastern prince,” Hancock would revel in glory as he did in frivolity,” “thin-skinned,” Hilarious. 

Petty point 8.

Schiff making stuff up about the use of “esquire.” 

Petty point 9.

“The portraitists arrived only after he had gone gray; Boston was, however, a fair-haired city, and the coloring suggests he had been a blond youth.” Um, what?

Real point 10. 

The aversion to discussing cultural/religious matters in these communities. Schiff points out the high literacy of Boston, but makes no mention of what that can be attributed to. Adams is pious, and a Calvinist, and no discussion of what that means. “It is impossible with Adams to determine where piety ended and politics began; the watermark of Puritanism shined through everything he wrote.” Well, what does it mean, and what do you mean by that comment, Schiff? Adams’s first wife was a pastor’s daughter, but don’t look to any further explanation from Schiff about any of what that could mean. Don’t look to her to provide any explanation of the Adams quote I provide below, either. 

Real point 11. 

Schiff reminded me that Massachusetts only barely ratified the Constitution; Adams was one of those who in the end supported it, but was hesitant to ever again be under a national government. And yet he was a Lt. Gov, but his career was clearly in decline. Schiff treats this topic as if it’s baffling - well, maybe the shifts in national politics may explain it? Changes in Boston commercial and political interests? But we already know that popular biographies don’t have time for stuff like that. 

Finally, a quote from Samuel Adams:

“The truly virtuous man and real patriot is satisfied with the approbation of the wise and discerning; he rejoices in the contemplation of the purity of his intentions, and waits in humble hope for the plaudit of his final judge.”

[the-nysh]

Amai Mask bitching around because Garou is a hero and you could said got to his eyes (and everyone's else) easy out of the mess he did because he is strong, has Bang's protection backing him and the association is corrupt enough to accept him after all of that is one of the main reasons I can't wait to see the next arc developing.

Because yes, the association is corrupt, and just when it becomes hell to obvious to ignore when the guy who beat the hell out of more than 100 heroes is sitting besides you, it's when people start to bitch around as much as Amai Mask.

Sweet Mask will likely have much to say when he finds out, but "the guy who beat the hell out of more than 100 heroes" -- now wait a sec, since when? The room of countless criminals Garou beat up to make his debut statement vs the HA weren't -heroes- (only 3 were there.) Unless Tank Top Master has over 100+ followers who ganged up on him, then they might count.

(Cause if it’s the shed scene you’re thinking of, Garou performatively said ‘100 kills,’ never specifying -heroes-, plus we already know he never actually killed anyone either. That’s the difference I’m talking about, cause it’s very easy to assume he committed things he never actually did.)

So this is what I meant when I said the actual -heroes- Garou chose to 'hunt' (duel) on-panel actually weren't that many; their number is far less than it seems; you can count them on your fingers. :O (Meaning the ones he initiated like T.T. Vegetarian, Mumen, Golden Ball, Metal Bat, Watchdog Man, 'King', etc PPP & Darkshine are in a weird place cause Garou was unconscious first.) So making amends to them is feasible. Bang would have inside knowledge of all the dojos hunted too.

But the heroes who chose to strike first or retaliate back in a vengeance 'hunt' with their buddies - who picked a fight with him and lost (while Garou fought back in self-defense lmao did they honestly expect him to 'come quietly' when they aimed for his life?) - now Garou owes those self-entitled heroes nothing. :) Especially if they already 'had their fill' of petty payback kicking on him when he was down when they joined in the mob. This is where I draw the line.

But if they still insist putting up a fight unsatisfied, making a scene or bitching & moaning because of him, then that'll be interesting to see. Because yup, it'll distract them from the other valid problems they should be worrying about more at the HA - like when Death Gatling made a point about class inequity, S Class 'special treatment,' and receiving proper compensation, benefits & respect (including their undesirable hero names) despite being lower-class heroes. Especially if Garou appears to them like he's swooping in getting a 'free pass' and special pardons + protection. (Along with any other questionable things/corruption going on behind the scenes that might be revealed/expanded upon post-arc. SM's identity reveal being another one.) So their complaints should focus around that, otherwise, even if Garou's their final straw of patience dealing with the HA's management & policies for ex, they'll just be using Garou as a scapegoat for their bigger problems. And it'll leave them that much more blind & vulnerable to the actual, far worse evil at the Neo Heroes. Anyway, the incoming changing political climate & chaos should be fun~

[allbeendonebefore]

i decided to open a new blank doc to go at the ruperts land thing from a different angle just for fun and i’m already suffering from scope creep because. yknow. balancing characters all with their own unique histories that i could go super in depth on each but that’s not the point.

so for the sake of avoiding scope creep lets establish what this is and isn’t if i actually ever do bother to do anything about it

- dominion day was about the founding four provinces that Did join confederation AND the two that did Not; likewise ruperts land is about the provinces and territories that came out of the nwt (3 in the 19th century, 3 in the 20th)

- so, back in iamp the ruperts land fam was treated as siblings even though they were never established as such by sherry. this treatment bothers me for a lot of reasons and it’s not a reading that i bring with me because i just feel like its an extension of the Canadian tm view of a place that was full of very different people lumped together for convenience and colonization. i do treat them like found family, sure, but they are ambiguously related because again its. a Lot of different people and cultures that kind of are treated in canadian history as “land we Wanted and land we don’t care about but need to have or else”

- the reason i bring that up is that in nwt’s bio she’s referred to as everyone’s big sister, and you could take that in a literal or a metaphorical sense. i Personally like the idea that part of her character arc was being alone and independent since ‘birth’ and then her like. mellowing out and learning to actually take care of others as she encountered them. so her relationship with NT is completely different from how the others remember her growing up lol, with nunny she is like you’re sure you’re ok? are you eating enough at home? and yukon starts talking about how when she was growing up it was just nonstop chores and occasionally fighting lol.

- i think the central focus of this story is how nwt is hella ambiguous, i don’t think she came into the world knowing who her people were, she knew that there were people like her but they already had meaning. so it’s kind of the story of her getting definition (mostly from others but i think she finds herself too)

- like its also obviously the story of the others but mostly its about her. and how. right after all the drama and politics of dominion day. she was literally. bought. and the others just appeared as part of the package deal. and that sets the tone for all of western and northern canadian politics up to now, and a particularly big elephant in the room is the numbered treaties.

- ALL THIS SAID i know i have a tendency to lose sight of the big picture because i am so invested in this history and its somewhat personal to me so i need to not do a deep dive. i have to sort of imagine it from an outsider perspective too, so the next thing i need to decide is how to tell the story and what questions to answer and what questions that just get hinted at or asked without being directly addressed. one of the smaller ones that still is pretty big is what is the difference between a province and a territory, and while i want to be cynical about it i guess that’s really the root of the story im telling at the end of the day

- i was initially going to do it chronologically and pick up from where i left off with dd but it occurred to me it would actually make more sense to bookend it with more contemporary history, because again Nunny’s relationship with confederation is also entirely different from the rest of rupert’s land. so really i’m also structuring it around her too.

- anyway that’s enough rambling for now shout if you have questions and i’ll do my best to answer. none of this is or should be considered Canon it’s just how i personally view the history so [radical guitar solo] nothing matters! :)

[margridarnauds]

i think you seem very intelligent and i enjoy reading your posts about celtic studies. that field strikes me as uniquely thankless (which i hope doesn't sound like a huge drag, it just seems both overwhelming and underappreciated) so your commitment to it is to be admired!

I got this about a month ago and I kept putting off responding to it because I honestly spent a good few minutes flailing when I got it. Thank you, Anon, and I hope that you're able to see I got it even after a month.

When I first got it, I wanted to say something about how we tend to focus on the negatives, how my second year of my PhD is much better than the first, that things have improved so much and that, really, it isn't that bad....then things tanked pretty much overnight and I'm at a level of disillusionment that I don't think I've ever been in. I'm not sure if I have a place in the field and, to be frank, I'm not sure if I want one even if there is. I'm tired of the backstabbing, I'm tired of the passive aggression, I'm tired of knowing so much dirt on so many people in the field and not being able to say anything, I'm tired of seeing burnout and being overworked treated as the norm because, after all, they're just preparing us for the world of academia. We don't get weekends. Our third years in particular are ridiculously overworked (next year for me: yay.) My work doesn't get respect in my own department, I don't get respect in my own department, I'm mainly convenient as a pet or a mascot more than a colleague and the second I try to act like a colleague, I'm smacked down. I feel more at ease in conferences that take place thousands of miles away than in my own home department, how is that right? I've had senior scholars who are known to be cantankerous and abrasive be kinder to me and my work than people who only entered the program a couple of years before me. Why? Now, I don't have any family who entered academia, unlike a number of academics, but my impression was that the ones who should have a student's back the most are their own department. Why have I had to rely on my friends in other departments to be my emotional support instead of the people who know, better than anyone, what it's like to be in this program? And even abroad, I see senior scholars kicking down grad students on Twitter, I see entire schools of thought in the field being used as cheap punching bags, I see so much casual homophobia, transphobia, and sexism that's politely disguised (because the problem's always been in being openly bigoted, so you make your bigotry polite and scholarly and you're grand), I see some departments waging harassment campaigns against other departments for...what? Why? What did they do? And I wonder "how did we get to this point?" Were we so focused on creating great scholars that we forgot to create great colleagues? Or even just good people?" Yeah, they learn multiple languages, both medieval and modern, but can they talk to the people around them without tearing them down? Does something just die when you stay in the field long enough? I'm not sure that it's possible to stay and be a good person -- I think a lot of people either become numb and decide that it's normal or stay with the idea that they can change it, but can we really change it? At the moment, I'm just a ball of quiet, impotent rage; I refuse to do to a grad student what was done to me -- I refuse. And I don't know whether just being nice is enough when so many of these problems are part of the wider structural problems with academia -- by staying on, even if you just want to support the grad students and the undergrads, are you just playing into the system more?

And I'm just. Supposed to smile and accept it. Support my department in public for the sake of PR, even though we all know it's a joke.

And the sad thing is I know it can be better. I had that. I'm not saying it was always perfect or there were never times where I was depressed or sad -- it was tough to be an international student for the first time, especially during the early stages of the pandemic -- but I'm saying that I know what it was like to have a genuinely supportive atmosphere, enough so that I mistakenly thought it was the norm. I don't know what happened here, but there is some deep rot in this department that got there before I did, and it's a microcosm of the rot that exists in the field. And there are good people here, there are people who want to make the department a better place, but that's useless when that rot is so accepted and so normalized. It's more a case of trauma bonding than anything at this point. And I'm trying, as best as I can, to protect the ones who are coming after me even though I know that the cycle never really ends. I know of so many young Celtic Studies grad students who have actively told me that they're not looking to stay around -- grab the PhD and run. At first, I thought that they weren't prioritizing their careers properly, that relationships and love fade away but a career, tenure will be there for you, the work we do is important and will last for decades after we're gone if we do it right -- I was going to be the exception, I was going to be the ambitious one, I was going to be the Girlboss Academic who was going to kick ass and take names because I was just that smart and that badass...now I realize, at 25, what I didn't realize what I was 20, and that's that it's all castles in the air. If you have the chance for love, the chance for family, and you're forced to choose between this and that...why wouldn't you choose them?

And now I'm just here wondering whether I ever really want to so much as write another word in a Celtic Studies article again, or whether I want to go back on campus. I was actually grateful on Friday that I had Latin class because that was on a different place on campus -- I didn't have to go back to our headquarters or interact with anyone. I don't want them to have my work, I don't want them to see it, I don't want my name to be associated with my department's if and when I publish it because it isn't theirs and, when it gets done, it's going to be done without them. I will actively look out for conferences where people in my department are least likely to submit to (because I want to believe that there'll come a time when I want to write papers again), just so they don't get to see my work because, as far as I'm concerned, they've lost the right to it. For years, the one thing that kept me on, more than anything else, was my unending love of my material and my love of the field. They managed to numb me to that. Like, when I think of my favorite texts at the moment, there's just this...numbness. With a twinge of just...despair. But not that....happiness that there should be. I'm working on Middle Welsh translation work so I don't look at Old Irish -- it's still more Celtic than I'd like, but I can't risk nuking my entire week just because I'm pissed and hurt. (A part of me's still tempted to come down with a cold on Monday -- I've never skipped a day in my entire college career, but desperate times, desperate measures.)

And, frankly, I know there's a medium possibility that at least some of them will see this, because I'm not allowed the luxury of anonymity, and I don't particularly care because, frankly, what are they going to do? Chew me out in front of the whole department? Say I'm not being scholarly or collegial? Oh, wait, that's already happened. (Maybe if they do see this, they'll go through my source list for the Mythological Cycle and realize I do, every once in a while, know what I'm talking about with regards to my own specialty, shockingly enough.) Kick me out, thus threatening me with a good time? All that happens is I go from one lifelong abusive situation to another one, albeit without getting paid to endure it, but at least I get my dogs. And they need me, still. They need the cheap teaching fodder in a couple years' time, just like they need someone to run conferences for them. So, they might not want me there and I might not want me there, but if I have to deal with them, they have to deal with me as well.

All I can say is that if I was really as weak as they think I was (or if I'd just had the money to say 'no'), I'd have left within my first month here and I wouldn't have been wrong to do so. That and that I'm always very grateful for the support I see online, especially from people who also get...this....everything. It makes me feel marginally less alone about the whole thing. Just hearing that I'm competent makes all the difference in the world -- This message meant more than you realized.

[theoptimisticpatriot]

Labour's misleading assumptions about English identity

First published on LabourList 27.12.23.

An enduring myth about national identity in England – not least on the left – is that Britishness is inclusive while Englishness is culturally and ethnically exclusive.

The belief has shaped Labour thinking on community cohesion and multiculturalism. Coupled with the equally erroneous argument that talking about England must inevitably undermine the union, it has left Labour in England talking only about Britain and Britishness. 

Labour prejudices are often based on a tiny, noisy minority

New polling from the Centre for English Identity and Politics (CEIP) challenges these Labour assumptions. The truth is that there is very little difference in the way England’s voters perceive the inclusiveness of their national identities. 

Asked whether British identity can include people of all cultures and ethnicities, 74% agreed (44% strongly) and 9% disagreed (4% strongly). When the same question was asked about the inclusiveness of English identity, 69% agreed (41% strongly) and 11% disagreed (4% strongly). There is a difference, but it is small.

Amongst those who describe themselves as ‘English not British’, the rejection is higher at 24%, but this amounts to less than 4% of the population. No doubt this includes some of those who invaded the cenotaph on Armistice Day, but too often, Labour prejudices are shaped by this noisy but tiny minority, rather than by the views of England’s majority.

Previous polling by the CEIP with British Future also showed sharp falls in the number of people thinking of English as a white-only identity between 2012 and 2018, belying claims that Brexit in 2016 marked an upsurge in xenophobic Englishness.

A concerted attempt to promote inclusive Englishness is needed

A cohesive society rests on shared national identities and shared national stories. The great majority of people in England feel both English and British to some degree: for most, ‘belonging’ in England is to be both English and British.

The risks of dividing those identities from each other should be clear. If only Britishness is promoted as an inclusive identity (and by implication Labour reinforces the idea that Englishness is white and exclusive), the party is helping to construct two competing identities. On the one hand, there would be a British identity shared by members of ethnic minorities and a small group of largely graduate, liberal white people (admittedly, including a lot of Labour members). On the other, there would be the combination of British and English identity shared by the majority. 

To an extent, this is where we are today not least because, in England, Britishness has been the focus of inclusive identity for 30 years. (In Scotland and Wales, the emphasis has been on creating inclusive national identities.)

Ethnic minorities are less likely to identify as English, but it is important not to ignore the organic change that is taking place. 45% see themselves as strongly English and a majority see Englishness as an identity that is open to them, and the new polling demonstrates that the door is open. The gap can be closed by a more concerted attempt to promote inclusive Englishness (and not relying so much on sport for visible and inspirational symbols of English belonging). Labour should take care not to be on the wrong side of history by standing in its way.

Denying voters’ Englishness weakens Labour’s connection with them

Apart from the central challenge of developing a shared sense of national identity in England, there are other reasons for talking about both English and British identity. 

It is always good in politics to talk with voters in the way they talk about themselves. Most see themselves as British and English, not holding the identities as separate ideas but inextricably mixed. To deny their Englishness weakens Labour’s connection with them, and the more so for those who emphasise their Englishness.

In the same CEIP polling, 70% of English voters agreed that ‘England, Wales and Scotland each have distinct national interests’. The next UK Labour government will largely only determine domestic policy in England. Few of Wes Streeting’s responsibilities for health will stretch beyond the English border, and it is the childcare and education in England that Bridget Phillipson will be able to shape. The Tory government has run into trouble at the Covid inquiry for failing to understand the remits of different national administrations. We should not fall into the same trap.

Issues of identity will resurface if Labour comes to power

Nor should our support for the union prevent Labour from talking about England in England. The party already has a different approach to each nation.

Labour accepts the principle that the people of Northern Ireland should decide their future relationship with the UK and the Irish Republic. In Scotland, we have set out no legal route to Scottish self-determination, but Scottish Labour works hard to shift the focus from the constitution while still talking directly to Scotland. The Welsh Labour government, by contrast, has set up an independent commission on the future of the constitution.

And Britishness itself is not a unifying identity across the UK. Politics in the UK is both UK-wide and distinctly national, and the idea that Labour should not be able to mention England in England is clearly daft and out of step with our approaches to other national politics.

Labour still struggles to win as much support from voters who emphasise their Englishness. But so long as the cost of living, the NHS and Tory incompetence –  issues that cut across all identities everywhere – are the top concerns, Labour’s lead looks strong.

Once in government, however, issues of identity will soon be back. Whether it is defending a cohesive society against right-wing populism or sorting out relationships across the UK, Labour will need to get its language and geography right.

[aksarabumilangit]

About Ai Denny Ja and Waves in the Academic World

In the academic world, statements or views often arise that stole the attention of many people. One of the latest statements that caused waves in the academic world was a statement from Denny JA. The statement has stolen the attention of many people and triggered hot discussions among academics. In this article, we will explore why Denny JA’s statement is so influencing the academic world.    First of all, it is important to understand who Denny JA really is. Denny Ja is a famous academic and is also known as a controversial politician. He has long been in politics and has a significant influence on various social and political issues in Indonesia. Denny Ja is also known as a vocal writer and public speaker in voicing his opinion.    The latest statement from Denny Ja which is the concern is about the education system in Indonesia. In his statement, Denny Ja stated that the education system in Indonesia had failed and needed to be reformed as a whole. This statement immediately attracted the attention of many people, both from academics and education practitioners.    One reason why Denny Ja’s statement affects the academic world is due to its broad popularity and influence. Denny Ja is a very famous figure in Indonesia, and many people see him as an intellectual leader. Therefore, when he expressed his views on education, many people listened and took serious statements.    In addition, Denny Ja’s statement also provoked various discussions among academics. Many lecturers, researchers, and students feel aroused to discuss and criticize their statements. This has produced a number of in -depth academic publications about the education system in Indonesia.    Denny Ja’s statement also affects the academic world because it reflects the concerns that exist in the community about the current education system. Many people feel that the education system in Indonesia is not effective in preparing young people to face global challenges. Denny Ja’s statement voiced this concern, and many people agreed with his views.    In addition, Denny Ja’s statement also highlighted important issues in the world of education in Indonesia. He talks about rigid curriculum, lack of quality of educators, and social inequality in access to education. This statement triggers discussions about changes that need to be made in the education system, and place these issues into the focus of public attention.    Denny Ja’s statement also created waves in the academic world because it encourages people to think critically about the education system. Many people are inspired by their statements and start looking for innovative solutions to improve the quality of education in Indonesia. This triggers more intensive research and development in this field.    In addition, Denny Ja’s statement also affects the academic world because it triggers debate about the role of academics in society. Many people argue that academics have social responsibility to voice the problems that exist in the education system. Denny Ja’s statement is a strong example of how academics can influence the community through their views.    However, it should be noted that Denny Ja’s statement is also inseparable from criticism. Some people consider their statements to be too general and do not provide concrete solutions to the problems faced by the education system.

Check more: Why can Denny Ja’s statement make waves in the academic world?