#because i’m not a toddler anymore and my angst teen phase passed the moment i started empathizing with my mother
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qu0rky · 16 hours ago
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What i despise the most about her character and the way she’s written (which was also pointed out by Danny Motta in his most recent reaction, though with much more comedic ire) is that she does the same thing over and over again, without seemingly learning anything.
She felt so hurt by her dad not knowing what she’s into now, and instead clinging on to the past (which was his biggest crime with her tbh), but does she give a single fuck about Stolas’ life before he had her? I never saw her make an effort to bond with him unless it was something SHE was already into. If she had, she’d understand why Stolas cares so much about Blitz. I don’t think she ever even realized just how miserable Stolas was whenever she was with her mom on the weekends.
Loona’s speech to her in Seeing Stars should’ve been the end of this arc. Of her teenage rebellion. Of her unreasonable anger towards her father. Because Loona put it perfectly, dads fuck up, but they’re trying, at least it’s very clear that Blitz and Stolas are. And they’re not just fathers, they’re multidimensional people, with hobbies and aspirations and relationships. She seemed to understand that speech. And yet now it’s like that bit of development never happened between them. Could she not have confided in Loona again?
And now that she’s susceptible to her mother and uncle’s manipulation, this could only get worse. I genuinely cannot handle seeing Stolas treated like shit by other people AGAIN. He’s had enough!! Let him heal.
As much as i can understand where Via is coming from, and her feelings are valid, she doesn’t see her dad as a living person outside of just being her father. And that isn’t right. It’s especially not right seeing just how many people feel absolutely no empathy for him.
“She was just a child having to endure all that!!” Okay, and how old was Stolas when he had to marry an abusive girl and have a kid of his own, exactly? At least he gave Via a chance to have a good childhood, he didn’t have one. He didn’t have anything except for his duties to carry out.
And while it’s heartbreaking that Via sees herself as an obligation, that’s literally what she was supposed to be. Though that doesn’t mean that was how he saw her. She was what saved him, what made him endure all the abuse, what kept him going.
But sometimes that’s not enough, he had NO ONE to confide in and couldn’t put his frustrations on his own kid (because he’s a good father, despite what some of you would like to believe, clearly you didn’t grow up with a parent trying to guilt you by traumadumping when you can barely understand it), so he also NEEDED the pills.
The thing is, i also had that mentality towards my mom for dealing with depression UNTIL i started experiencing it myself. Because it’s so hard to realize that your parents are also human beings, since they’re supposed to protect you, they’re supposed to have everything figured out, to be the shoulder you cry on.
But if i see another dumbass claim that he CHOSE to leave and made the wrong decision in Mastermind, i need you out of this fandom. The whole point of that was that he had no choice, was he supposed to throw away the man he fell in love with, his first friend, his first time that wasn’t for procreation, and the one who liberated him? Stolas is allowed to care for more than one person, and he deserves to be loved romantically by someone.
You’re being too harsh on Stolas because for whatever reason you hate an abuse victim finally having a say in how to live for once in their lives, adding on top of that the weird, underlying homophobia in some of your criticisms for him.
Also i have a bad taste in my mouth from Via only seemingly hating Stolas, despite having SEEN how shitty Stella is. Sure, she doesn’t know the full extent of the abuse, but she’s heard the yelling, she’s seen the throwing, the ridiculing, the insensitivity. And most likely that woman neglected Via as much as possible, because she also didn’t choose to have her, but unlike Stolas she didn’t give a fuck to take responsibility regardless. (Reminding you of the “You get up” comment from Loo Loo Land). This was all happening before the cheating, so that’s not an excuse for her behavior (not that the cheating was, but at least Via would have been able to reason with her reaction to it).
It’s a complicated situation and it’s so shitty to put all the blame on Stolas, he tried so much for his family, but it was never going to be enough, because he’s gay. I’m glad he got out of that marriage.
Honestly, had i been given all those responsibilities at his age in a loveless marriage, i would’ve gone insane. I wouldn’t have been kind to my child, the cause of my shit life. But he never saw her as a weight on his shoulders, he has so much love for Via.
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