#because i may be a hypocrite but i'll be honest:

[cosmogyros]

.

[upper-eepy-sleepy-girl]

remember a few months ago when there were a bunch of posts going around about how "I'd rather extend help to someone who doesn't need help then potentially deny help to someone who needs it", Whatever happened to that?

[meo-eiru]

*cracks knuckles* here I am again. this time with Micah as my victim

so at first,

you definitely should add some more story to him. so far, if I'm being honest, he feels a bit too plain to me. but oh boy, what a potential I see here!

alright lets begin

omg look at him! such a hypocrite! how smart it is, to put all blame on MC while being just as (actually even more) sinful. and he sure hides well; it's your fault, isn't it? oh you and your sinful mind.

buut despite him not really being my cup of tea, I still do like a good old concept of ugly insides, hidden behind a beautiful shell (if that's the vibe you were going for).

Micah seems so pure, so holy, almost like an angel (you played smart by adding a lot of white in his design) – but behind that pristine facade? he's ugly. and that shell eventually starts to crack, because no matter how pure he may seem, Micah is just as human as we are, and definitely not a good one. and what are we, if not a bunch of cruel, egotistical animals? and deep inside he's exactly that, sickeningly human. with that in mind the very first comic you did abt him is actually pretty hilarious to me. your desires? what about his desires, which are strong enough to ruin your whole life?

I kinda feel like he's also a little pathetic in his own way; if he can't make you fall for him, he will break you. isn't it like a very cowardly move? he wants you badly enough to use whatever method it may require to have you, but will never admit it.

but let's talk about that strange desire to destroy MC's purity. why? to make you just as dirty as he is? cute, but doesn't seem like a full explanation to me. he's a priest, right? and even despite those dark insides of his, I feel like Micah still kept at least some of the priest mindset. I mean, they're raised and taught with a very strict discipline. so I feel like deep down, he feels bad (not ashamed, but in a "how dare they" way) for his attraction to you, and punishes you for that attraction. it's not your fault, of course, but who cares? you managed to destroy his perfect, clean facade, which he was methodically building for his whole life with simply your existence. isn't that unfair? so now you must fall into the depths of hell with him.

I like how we can't justify him. Micah is perfectly aware of what he is doing. and of twisted nature of his feelings too, I think, yet still chooses to indulge in his desires, even if it hurts you, the person he was supposed to love and cherish. he makes me feel an absolute, poetic rage, and I love a character I can hate. (don't get me wrong, it meant to be a praise)

and I absolutely adore his design. also if I was on point with the idea you meant for him, that is wonderful too. if a character makes me feel something, I like that character. but girl, you really should add more details about him. because everything I've written here is, basically, just my own brainstorming and bare theories. Micah needs to have more meat on him for a full character analysis >_>

but anyway, I actually have a question.

what if MC wasn't in any way pure? what if they're a complete opposite of that word? count it on my love for hunchback of notre dame

unlike the nun MC, I suggest a MC who fully embraces their sins. like an evil succubus, they enjoy the joys of being tainted. they know what influence they have on their dear Father Micah, and isn't ashamed of that. I feel like that would make a pretty interesting story

(cough cough draw him blushing and moaning and my life is yours darling)

Another absolutely incredible ask I'll have a field day answering.

I do agree with him being a bit under developed at the moment. Micah was a bit unfortunate as in he was never meant to be an actual character. He was just a momentary creation who existed for me to study color theory. A beautiful man of flowers who didn't have an identity.

Then he joined the cast when I was busy with working on commissions and the 5k celebration comic so I didn't have the time to draw his introduction comic with the things I had planned for him, though I've been trying my best to explore him a bit more thru asks like this one. The fact that I don't want to spoil the stuff I'll draw in his comic is also holding me back a little.

I think Micah is evil, but not completely bad. A man who was born twisted, who was raised into goodness, and even with all the love he received never truly got rid of his inner darkness, but just once, just for one moment, I think he had good in his heart. And that is when he first saw you.

With all his twistedness, all his evilness, all his darkness, I think that love he felt for you was truly pure. Because in his eyes you appeared truly beautiful, like a pure lily.

But Micah isn't a pure man, neither does he want to be. So he prefers to pull you down to his level, so that you two can be sinful together. A truly impure way of feeling that pure and innocent love.

I have gotten asks about him with a more rowdy darling, one who isn't a nun or one who is more sinful. I've been really brainstorming about it but I don't think it would work. Not because I personally can't force the story into being like that but because I think it was just not meant to be like that.

You see I do come up with the characters, but I don't control their actions. If the character is unwilling I can't shape the story to my will. Because that story is their life and they control it. The best I can do is to try to fill the gaps I can.

I might prefer submissive yanderes, I might want Micah to have a more sinful darling instead but it wouldn't be Micah's story anymore. That's one of the reasons why he's so different from the rest of the boys. I'm not super into very dominant guys, I could probably count the ones I have with one hand, it wasn't my intention for Micah to be the way he is, but I don't think he could've been any other way.

Micah was just meant to be manipulative, a gaslighter, a dirty man who'll pull anything to push you below him.

I guess me looking at my stories from an actual novel or manga perspective also contributes to this. Father Micah exists to shine with a darling who he can soil.

Now the darling can maybe go against him in the future, she might rebel or give in to his sinful ways, but that's a different story.

[linberlyy]

Let's be honest: Criston's offense’s more than justified and well-reasoned. Another question is how much this very offense is, but everyone will judge this through their own internal compass. Let me explain Cole’s motivation and worldview, maybe I'll open someone's eyes.

Let’s simulate the situation: we have a son from a humble family (so low that his position was low even for an engagement), who, with sweat, blood, his skills and efforts, carved out a place for himself in the Kingsguard, taking into account that, thanks to the goodwill of a representative of the royal family, - who has a golden spoon in her mouth, we remember, was able to get a healthy assessment of her capabilities and skills without watered calculations.

- “I know what it’s like to fight for something that others don’t value.”

He owes his new position precisely to the favor of the princess, and we have no reason to refute Criston’s conscience, because BEFORE any traumatic and drastic changes/events, he manifests himself as a conscientious and devoted knight, with a clear worldview.

They spend a lot of time together, and already at Aegon’s name day we see that the level of trust between Rhaenyra and Criston is high, moreover, it is rapidly gaining momentum when she opens some part of her soul, shares things that can be called “personal”, laments his situation and outlines the problems he faces. Most notable:

— “My father is trying to sell me to Jason Lannister. I was named heir to the throne only to improve the position of Lord Casterly Rock.

— Should I kill him?”

This is literally a joke about killing the LORD that Criston makes in the presence of the princess, and it is remarkable that they both laugh without taking it seriously.

— “You can choose your own path, you are lucky. Many would gladly change places with you.

— “I am the princess of Dragonstone, but I am toothless.”

— “Once, not so long ago, you were able to write my name in the White Book. A position in the Kingsguard is the highest honor for the Cole family. I owe you everything. And I wouldn’t call it toothless.”

He provides her with sincere support, without greedy or hypocritical intent, and she accepts it with open arms.

The development of their relationship, on the initiative of the princess, follows immediately when, after some time, abandoned by Daemon (I condemn) in a brothel, she persuades Criston to have sex. Rhaenyra lures him into the room, plays with the helmet, kisses him, not allowing him to leave, and then tries to free the knight from his armor. Yes, Criston could more than experience romantic feelings towards his princess, but above all, it was a kind of admiration, sincere gratitude for what bestowed her favor on the rootless commoner. His representation of Rhaenyra may seem banal and naive, namely as “a poor princess, enslaved by her position,” we will note this in the future. But based on his pure motives, he faces a choice in which his feelings equally suffer, his vows and, of course, the wishes of his object of desire, in relation to whom Criston has never crossed the line before, are called into question. Many may underestimate the pressure that arises between the statuses and titles of total opposites, and only in the example of “maid - prince” do some realize the problematic nature of such a union, but not “princess - knight”. Please note: despite gender, it is still a class difference that breeds power with abuse. And, unfortunately, Cole cannot know and be sure that Rhaenyra’s need to get sex here and now has nothing to do with her love for him. He hesitantly follows the princess's lead, putting aside his white cloak.

Next we see and hear that Criston is ashamed of himself for violating his honor, neglecting his duty, although he listened to his heart, to his duty to Rhaenyra.

— “You occasionally confided in me... Over the years of acquaintance. And it seems to me that I know you. A little.

— “More than a little.”

Another imaginary confirmation in Christon’s eyes of reciprocity.

— “You have said many times how you despise your position. That you will be married off at the whim of your father, without thinking about the inclination of your heart. And this day has come."

He imbues her with the problem mentioned in the past; driven not only by his dilemma, but also by Rhaenyra's “confinement,” a literal shackle that equally binds and constrains them both.

— “I ask you to come with me. Away from all this, from the humiliations and burdens of your heritage. Let's leave all this and look at the world together. We will be free, nameless. We are free to go wherever we want, to love whoever we want. Will you marry me? Not for the crown. For love.

— “I’m the Crown, Ser Criston. Or I will be her. I can complain about my debt, but would I choose infamy in exchange for a barrel of oranges, or a ship to Asshai? It is my duty to marry a noble of a great house. But my marriage is not the end all be all. Ser Criston, Laenor and I have come to an understanding. I gave him the right to do what he wants. He granted me the same”.

— “Do you want to make me a whore?”

— “I want what started to continue.” You are my protector. My white knight”.

— “I made a vow, a vow of chastity. I have nothing but my white cloak, and I have stained it! I thought the wedding would cleanse him.”

Literally, Criston pours out not only his soul to Rhaenyra, but also to us, as viewers. He dictates the reality of his situation, assures that he can provide and protect the princess as much as possible. But, of course, for the blood of the dragon, for the heiress, for the father’s daughter, who was previously brought up in the conditions of “do you want it? Get it!” such a prospect is worthless. Naive of Cole? Yes, but not without reason.

After everything, he feels extremely vulnerable, as well as after a sincere confession to the Queen - which responds even more precariously and nervously to any conscience and confidence, despite her gratitude. Already at the wedding of Rhaenyra and Laenor, Cole, like a taut string, stands at the service, but restlessly and nervously looks at the princess.

— “I’m on duty, what’s your business?”

— “You don’t know me, Ser Criston, but this alliance is very important to both of us.”

— “If you have something to say, Ser Joffrey, speak.”

— “Ser Laenor is as dear to me as I know the princess is to you. We must swear to keep them and their secrets. We’re not in any danger yet... They are safe.”

Sounds like a threat to a pins and needles knight with a stained cloak and a sense of duty, don’t you think? Criston can only guess how Joffrey knows about his affair with the princess, and only one of the options may look convincing - Rhaenyra telling Laenor about this, who could notify his lover along the chain. Again, every possible inclination towards princess on his part is undermined when their secret is at stake. Yes, Criston succumbs to anger and panic, resentment and hopelessness, for which he commits a much more terrible act than calling a woman names. But even so, Cole feels guilt, boundless disappointment, and at the lynching he also feels remorse. He plans to voluntarily commit suicide and admits his every mistake. This scene is literally the rebirth of a knight in the rays of Alicent’s understanding and favor.

And as a result: people complain countless times and blame Criston for swearing towards Rhaenyra, for which he apologizes. Cool. Let's think critically and delve into the story and characters, and not spit hypocrisy.

[theamityelf]

If you had to put a twist on Makoto's parents what would it be? Honestly the fandom doesn't do them any justice, I barely see any headcanons with them and that makes me a bit bummed. I saw someone make a post on how maybe they were ultimates in the past with Makoto and Komaru vaguely inherting their talents (Ultimate Lawyer for the mom and Ultimate Sniper for the dad). What really caught my interest though was when someone pointed out that the reason Komaru might be so cool with Toko/Syo is because one or both of her parents were kinda yanderes. Mr. Naegi definitely has that look that something is off about him so it kinda works but Mrs. Naegi could be to but manages to behave in a way that doesn't draw attention to her.

Honestly I could see how Makoto's strong belief may have come from them as well but that might be a bit far fetched. I just enjoy the idea of everyone thinking Makoto and Komaru are normal only for them to turn around and do some crazy sh*t.

The funny thing is, before I clicked to check this ask, when I only saw the first sentence, I was already thinking in somewhat yandere terms.

(Also, all of this is just me brainstorming, lol.)

I don't think I want them to be Ultimates, because I really value when characters aren't Ultimates, but I definitely lean in the direction of them being lowkey super abnormal in ways that resulted in both their kids' guise of normalcy and their kids' unusual tolerance for ridiculosity.

The first thing I imagined (again, before I read the full ask) was that Mr. or Mrs. Naegi killed the teacher who snuck into Komaru's room that one time. Like, they caught him sneaking in and now he's buried in their yard, and when Komaru brought up seeing a ghost in her room, they were just like "That's right, honey, it was a ghost." I don't know if I more enjoy the idea of them being hypocrites about this (like, teaching the kids that murder is Just Wrong no matter what, without a hint of irony) or super honest (like, "Murder is wrong, but if someone messes with my kids, I'll kill 'em. I'll do it." "Daaaad..." "We're not saying we want to, honey, we're just saying we will." "Moooom!")

(Or maybe we could take that same intensity, and instead of murder, make it more psychological warfare, to kind of mirror Makoto and Komaru's people skills.)

Just generally, I find it fun to imagine the Naegi parents as almost bizarre caricatures of normalcy. Almost like they're putting on an act of what humans are like, except they genuinely think they're being normal. They're deliberately availing their kids of the most basic, popular media enjoyed by the masses, because that's what people do; those are the things people enjoy. (They'll go to the movies, not having seen any trailers or feeling any anticipation for a particular film, and they just pick whatever movie the most other people in the ticket line went for.) They know the exact average time most people have dinner and that's dinnertime for the house. (It doesn't end in :00, :15, :30, or :45; it is a very irregular and specific time.)

It sounds like it would be strict and meticulous, but in execution, they're so casual about it that it wouldn't seem weird until you heard them explain it.

When Makoto says he's extremely average, he's not just being self-deprecating; he is giving an accurate description of his family's lifestyle.

[storytellingbadger]

I'm not trying to defend Lunar. I genuinely think he's a hypocrite (just like the rest of the family, to a greater or lesser extent). He's quite immature. Despite shouting about being an adult, he doesn't act like one. This is even the case now that he's hurt the sister he loves so much and then run away.

But I can see how this desensitisation goes back even before the Astrals had any influence. Every time Lunar shows a negative emotion or makes a mistake, like when he killed Eclipse, he was practically abandoned by all his family and friends except for Solar. They didn't offer him any support until he apologised to Earth and she accepted his apologies. What can we learn from that kind of experience? If I feel negative emotions or make a mistake, I'm a bad person.(I've learned that if you hurt Earth in any way, you'll be punished for the universe lol). Given what happened with Nexus, I'm not surprised. It seems that Lunar has never fully recovered from what happened with Eclipse. He seems to have forced himself to pretend that he did, both for the sake of the Astrals and for his family, because otherwise he would be seen as the bad guy. His thoughts probably went something like this: "If I lie and pretend hard enough, I'm sure I'll end up believing it too."

Again, this doesn't justify his bad actions seen in today's episode.

Hello, and thank you for the ask!

I agree about Lunar being immature. And the protect-Earth brigade being activated at a nanosecond's notice, no matter who's involved or what happened.

I don't entirely agree (respectfully!) about Lunar being abandoned whenever he makes a mistake. Astrals, yes, pretty unavoidable when you operate on a completely different emotional and ethical spectrum - family, not so much. I admittedly don't follow the LAES half as closely as TSAMS, but seemed to me that family rarely called Lunar out on his apathy/childishness because it just wasn't worth it. Unless Earth was involved, as you rightly identified XD

More generally, I agree that Lunar isn't over what happened with Eclipse, probably never will be, and may never forgive him. Entirely valid. The 'forgiveness above all else' trope is rampant in media and it's daft. Earth is sweet but she often errs into the talk about it/hug it out mindset, as if everything is forgivable given enough time - and in my entirely unprofessional opinion, that's rubbish. Some hurts last forever.

On that note, Lunar's under no obligation to be okay with Earth befriending Eclipse. I'm not really sure what she expected, to be honest? I'd be seething if I was Lunar. There's too much bad blood there.

But that doesn't grant Lunar free rein to flagrantly and callously ignore everyone else's problems, and then violently lash out when critiqued. He'd go apeshit if someone did that to him.

Lunar cut Nexus out of his life with zero hesitation when he disrespected Earth. The parallels are pretty stark.

Essay over - thank you again for the ask, and I hope this comes across as conversational and non-hostile as possible. Have a good day!

[kamimarroco]

A story where Ren suddenly starts chatting with you because he apparently cares about you staying up late at night. Not reviewed, may undergo corrections in the future.

Words: 1100+

“are you still awake?”

The vibration of your phone and the appearance of a notification startled you, almost making you drop the device. You looked closely at the top left corner of the screen and saw the time.

It is currently 2:35 in the morning.

People at this time are usually sleeping, and those who aren't are probably sorting out work issues or are insomniacs.

You didn't fit into either of them, since your irregularity was due to the fact that you were too stubborn.

A shame, really.

You didn't stand on ceremony and immediately clicked on the notification, being taken to the chat with an unknown person.

Well, not really an unknown person... Looking more carefully, your sleepy mind managed to rationalize and recognize who you were talking to.

Oh, it's Ren.

“yea but dw, i'll go to sleep soon”

You immediately saw him start writing after receiving your message.

“are you sure? that doesn't sound honest to me. you've been online a lot lately”

How long exactly has he been watching you to say that? Sure, it's possible to see when your profile is online because of the app's settings, but it makes you wonder if he's been watching you all this time.

“have you been watching me online?”, you ask without hesitation.

You feel him give a slight chuckle from the other side of the screen.

“haha maybe. but don't get me wrong, you really do spend a lot of time awake at night, and that makes me a lil worried”

You're torn between finding his statement strange or acknowledging your not-so-healthy habit. It's true, you're weird, anyone would find it at least slightly worrying that you spend so much time online in the early hours of the morning.

“and what about you? you are also online right now at this very moment”, you retort back, anxiety consuming you as you wait for his response.

He would be considered a hypocrite for finding your habit troubling if he does the exact same thing.

“i have a very valid reason for that. my routine makes me stay awake at night and sleep in the morning or afternoon”

Now you feel an arrow hitting right in the middle of your heart. Sure, of course he would have a good reason to be awake at this hour.

You are the only odd one out in this situation.

“i'm sorry about that, i felt defensive about my habit being called out”, you apologized, worried that your words had come across as rude to him.

“that's alright. it's 2:42 am, no hard feelings”

You felt relieved that he didn't resent your words, despite knowing that they did not convey the same intonation as in real life.

you're thinking too much (or too little), your emotions are starting to eat you up.

“but i still think you should sleep”, he sent a second message.

You felt like a child being scolded by your father, being called out for your unhealthy behavior. You felt your cheeks flush and shame enter your system.

“i already told you, i'll sleep soon”, even if he doesn't notice, you felt like a sullen child trying to explain yourself.

“wheeen?”

“by the holy of god Ren, i'm not some kind of child”, you felt the need to say his nickname (name?) for the first time, trying to emphasize your slight irritation.

This time it took him a while to answer you, seeming to process the fact that you called him by his name. You felt judged in some way for this, thinking that maybe you weren't close enough to call him that.

when did you get so soft? is it sleep that's making you think too much?

Just as you were about to text him an apology, he interrupted you.

“i know that, i just worry about you”, his message warmed your heart in a way you couldn't imagine.

That's… sweet of him. Worrying about you even though you two are just strangers on the internet who bump into each other every now and then.

Are you falling in love?

“i appreciate ur concern, but i know what i'm doing”

No, you don't.

He sent you a picture of a fox with one eyebrow raised, appearing to doubt your certainty.

That brought out a genuine laugh you didn't know you were holding back.

you're leaving yourself vulnerable around him.

“aaaw what a cutie fox!! <3”, you said, referring to the image received.

“it really is! do you like foxes?”

“yea i like them! they are cute and fluffy and i honestly feel like hugging them”

For a while, Ren seemed to forget the fact that you were awake and kept talking to you about random, unrelated topics. Neither of them really had any connection with the other, but one thing led to another.

You noticed how easy it is to talk to him. He has a fluid oratory and is always making associations with other things he knows.

You found yourself incredibly interested and captivated in the conversation you suddenly began having with this stranger.

is this a red flag? shouldn't you be more concerned about a sudden approach?

When you looked at the time on your phone, you realized it was already 3:56 am, almost four in the morning.

Jesus, did you really spend that much time talking to him?

Feeling the tiredness consume you completely, you (finally) felt it was time to let your body have some much-needed rest.

“hey i know we're still talking, but it's almost four in the morning…”, you began delicately, not wanting to give him the wrong idea that you didn't want to talk anymore.

why are you so concerned about what he thinks, in the first place?

“i don't want to let our conversation end here, so i thought we could continue it another time”

Nonono, stop this, you're falling into his trap

“i'm sorry about this, my body is really screaming for sleep”

You idiot.

Ren analyzed your messages a bit before giving a proper response.

“awe that's alright! i really wanted u to sleep in the first place, and i feel kind of guilty that i did a bad job xd”

“keeping u awake and everything”

You felt guilty for him feeling guilty because it wasn't his fault in the first place! You were the idiot who decided to stay up at night, so the damage was already done.

“nonono u didn't! i was the dumb one for staying awake until now”

“i really enjoyed our conversation tbh”

You sent it and already felt your eyelashes getting heavy.

“hehe me too! i look forward to our next conversations”

“but now u really need to sleep, so pls don't stay up too long <3”

Silly little guy. He really gets you, doesn't he?

You felt happy that you had at least met someone during your time awake at night.

[hexedwinchester]

How come u dont love Sam protecter and older brother Dean🥹

By Sam own words Dean raised him, a-lot of the good qualities that Sam has he got from Dean. Yeah Sam childhood wasn't the best, but he was deeply loved by Dean, i believe this love helped overcome many obstacles in his life.

In fact again by Sam own words, Deans love and protection is the only thing he could always count on.

I am not saying Dean is perfect, but who is ? To say that Sam needed protection from Dean sounds odd, where Dean is literally his home and the only place he feels safe.

hi @rosedark88

Interesting question and perspective you have offered.. this would be fun to analyse 😊

Before I start, let me be honest: I'm not Dean's biggest fan because I find a lot of his actions to be problematic. Please proceed with caution: you may not like the answer but I'll break it down as logically as I can. (Please remember, this is not a hate post)

Yes, I agree Dean has been Sam's protector (but only until early seasons. I'll explain what I mean) and he did raise him but time and again Dean has confessed if not to others, then his own subconscious that he hated having to carry that burden. He has let it slip that he is bitter about having to raise Sam (which I can understand, it wasn't fair) but I've seen him pretends otherwise which is two-faced IMO. (He confesses this in S03E10 Dream A Little Dream of Me when he is facing himself, in case you are looking for a reference.)

He is also a hypocrite with repressed emotions. He says he admires his dad but deep down he too resented him but he still gave Sam shit about him because Sam was just more blunt about his opinion of John unlike Dean. Again, in the same episode he says "my dad was an obsessed bastard. All that crap about keeping Sam safe was his crap." See what I mean?

Continuing on the hypocrisy, his whole agenda of "what's dead should stay dead" is gone for a toss when he makes that deal the first time to save Sam in S2. He gave Sam a lot of shit for trusting Ruby because she's a demon (unfortunate for Sam she had bad intentions) but Dean trusted Benny, Gadreel, Crowley and Cas when all of these guys have broken his trust later. But we don't see Sam bringing that shit up like Dean tends to.

Let's also not forget that Dean berated Sam for getting Charlie killed over the Book of the Damned but apparently no one cares that his manipulation got Kevin killed too? Do you see the double standards here?

Speaking of saving Sam, every single time he has done something apocalyptic to save Sam, it was for selfish reasons. The main reason is because Dean struggles to let go, to move on. He'd rather drag a zombie Sam around than let the man die. Even you have to agree there's some truth in that.

Dean hated that Sam left for college and it wasn't because he was afraid something might get to him. No, it was because he saw that as Sam's betrayal. That Sam picked college over him.

Now, coming to your question about why Sam needs protection from Dean his apparent 'savior'? Yes, Dean is willing to do anything to "save Sam" from every evil thing out there but that's the whole problem. Why even Billie doesn't like the Winchesters because these guys are willing to risk the destruction of the whole world to save each other which isn't right.

let's look at those grave "save Sam" moments and see what's wrong with those pictures:

Sam's first death in S2: Dean bought himself one way ticket to Hell to bring Sam back because he didn't want to keep doing this without Sam (he confesses this in his monologue to Sam's corpse and also in the Croaton episode when he finds out Sam is infected and doesn't leave). Dean is literally nobody without Sam and I'm not saying this. This is who Dean is. Sam is Dean's essence for survival. So Dean saved Sam for himself putting Sam through the same ordeal that John put Dean through. Dean passes on his trauma to Sam like a hand me down.

Sam's detox: Bobby tried to knock sense into him that it's probably the cold turkey thing that's killing Sam. I know Dean was trying to help him but I doubt he knew the right way to do so. Even when he realised his method would kill Sam, he was okay letting him suffer like that until he died (because then at least he dies human). I'm sorry that's not how you deal with someone with addiction problem. Despite everything, Sam is still willing to work with Dean but he can't get over Sam choosing Ruby and calls Sam a monster.

In season 6, the brothers realise something is off about Sam. At the end of the episode 'You Can't Handle the Truth' Sam comes clean that he felt different since he was brought back and he needs help to figure it out and how does Dean help him? By beating him unconscious, tying him to the chair like he is a monster? The way he talks to Sam in that scene: "you better hope he (Cas) can diagnose you. he asks, you answer and then you shut your cakehole". So Sam isn't allowed to talk about his own body? Oh wait I know, he's not, not when Dean said so.

In Season 8, he impersonates Amelia, sending Sam SOS just so he can he rendevous with Benny? Amelia was a shore in his Sam's storm. He loved her and deeply cared for her. To let him think something happened to her was cruel. Especially given how Sam's past relationships ended up his beloveds dying horrifically. Who plays such sick mind games? And to your own brother??!

Season 9, my favourite, the one that completely dissolved the rose tinted glasses that the show created for Dean: Manipulating Sam into saying yes to be possessed by an angel (an angel you know nothing of) knowing Sam's history of possession, that was just sick. Sam wanted to die. He was ready. If Dean wanted to save him, the least he could do was be honest about it. Not manipulate him into saying yes. But he didn't. He resorted to manipulation because he knew Sam would rather die than be possessed. Something that people fail to understand here is 'the idea of possession' is a hard limit for Sam. But Dean has no regard for it because in his head "he did what he had to and he won't even apologize for that". I'm sorry, that's the biggest red flag to me. I don't care if you have raised me, protected me and kept me safe only for you to stab me where I'm the most vulnerable. You are no different than all those evil things out to hurt me. That's why I love Sam for standing his ground and not forgiving Dean for this. He was right to say he didn't want to be brothers. If my siblings betrayed me like that, I'd leave too.

And whenn in Season 9 finale, Dean wanted to go off to kill metatron on his own, Sam wanted to tag along but what's dean's response? Punch him into unconsciousness and leave him on the street like that? All vulnerable for any monster to attack him? Really?! How is this protecting? Ya maybe metatron won't kill him but something else still might!

Oh and in Season 15, Dean pulled a gun on Sam and mind you he under no dark influence. This was all him. I'm not even going to elaborate further on this.

I can list at least 10 occasions where Dean has hit, punched, beat up Sam but Sam hasn't fought back. And that's not even what bothers me the most. It's the fact that Sam doesn't look surprised (meaning Dean beaten him before and I so believe he has and it's a frequent, almost business as usual like) or he looks scared (I'll try to find that gif where Sam is on the ground putting his hands before his face to protect himself against Dean). Dean is abusive when he is angry.

Something you said in the ask that struck me odd. What qualities did Sam learn from Dean? Let's see some of Sam's core good qualities:

Emotional intelligence

Forgiving

Compassionate

Empathetic

Selflessness

Determination

Self awareness

Open mindedness

Authencity

Dean is not known for any of the above qualities, so I disagree he learnt his good qualities from Dean. Dean has an emotional intelligence of a wooden plank. He holds grudges and isn't nearly as forgiving as Sam is. Compassion and empathy are not Dean's qualities either. Dean is selfish. His first thought is how to use someone to his advantage. He did that with Cas, Crowley, even Jack. I've seen Dean give up more often. His "I can't keep doing this", "why is it our job to save everyone", "who says I want to do this?" are all indicators of this. Self-awareness tends to dwell in his blindspot. I've said this before, Dean is black and white, Sam is grey area meaning Sam is more open minded than Dean. My favourite: nothing about Dean is original. His leather jacket? John's. His car? John's. His music? John's. His life motto? Also John's. Whereas Sam has been authentic, true to himself than Dean ever could. Did Sam learn hunting from Dean? Yes. Loyalty? Yes. But neither of these are Sam's core qualities. So I disagree that Sam's good qualities come from Dean. If anything, his good qualities are actually him trying not to be like Dean.

Sam can count on Dean's love and protection because he has been conditioned to since he was 6 months old. First by his father and then by Dean himself either through emotional abuse (he keeps reminding him about how his decisions always end up with someone dying or gaslighting him into guilt tripping on things outside his control) or downright physical beatings. The Winchesters have dysfunctional family and relationships. Again, remember Sam is the forgiving one in this relationship. In fact Sam is forgiving to a fault and that's what this is. It doesn't make Dean's actions right just because Sam has been forgiving them.

To summarise, here why I feel Sam needs protection from Dean:

Dean saves Sam only because he doesn't know how to live without him. That's not normal. He has done crazy shit to "save him" resulting in causing Sam more trauma

He quickly lashes out (often resulting in verbal or physical violence) because of his repressed emotions and poor anger management

He has verbally and physically hurt Sam either by calling him a monster or saying he doesn't trust him or by beating him unconscious on multiple occasions

he is controlling, bossy and threatening. "If didn't know you, I'd want to hunt you." Sorry, if I were Sam, I wouldn't feel very safe

Dean doesn't see the wrong in his action or worse, even when he knows he is wrong, he is too stubborn to apologise for that. Everything is shoved under "I did what I had to" or "I'm not apologizing for saving you".

Dean has manipulated Sam and gaslit him

His whole "this is a dictatorship" comes across as a red flag which takes me to my next point:

He never treated Sam as his equal. Don't see how that counts as love

Dean was mad at Sam in DSOTM because Sam's happy memories (that Sam wasn't in control of and the whole situation was probably rigged. I mean, Zachariah cosied up with Mary's image for god's sake) didn't involve Dean. The idea that Sam can have a life outside Dean has never sat well with him

He has locked Sam in the panic room on at least 3 occasions. Sam hasn't done that even once

Sorry, but Dean is not a poster boy for love and protection. When I look at a character, I not only analyse their actions but also try to understand why they acted the way they did. In Dean's case, the why has always been problematic.

Dean's intentions maybe good but his actions don't always align. His philosophy has always been "if the means justify the end" but I don't stand by it. This is what makes room for immoral, tyrant and corrupt actions and an excuse to hide you wrong doings behind those.

These are my views on why I feel Sam needed to be saved from Dean. You may or may not agree and it's fine either ways 😊

Damn! That was lengthy. But thanks for this interesting ask, it was fun! 😇

[wolfgang1097]

Disclaimer: I do not condone in anything disturbing nor inappropriate with any of the subject matter involved. I also do not condone in any trolling either.

"White Spy is the Snow White of Spy vs. Spy," White is pure and wholesome," and blah blah blah...

You've got to be kidding! I'm sorry, but if you think and even headcanon that White Spy is pure and wholesome and even portray him as a hero all the time while treating Black like he's a spawn of Satan, then you're living in a fart bubble! Just because White is great with animals, especially dogs, does not mean that he's a "good boy," and I have proof of why every single claim about White Spy being "angelic" is all a bunch of bullcrap:

Plus, there's this part when he threatens the plastic surgeon into making a clone of himself just before that one graphically violent scene that I exposed back in late-January or early-February:

Then there's this scene where he thinks this random old lady is Black in disguise and tries to attack her, only for the old lady to kick his ass:

In my honest opinion, White deserved it. In another paperback strip he forces a Black Embassy geisha at gunpoint to have a clam form a pearl around a bugged microphone. It is from a paperback that I don't have a physical copy of as of yet, but that one is from "The Fourth Declassified Files of Spy vs. Spy," which was later reprinted as "Missions of Madness," I think. Once I have saved up enough, I'll be looking forward to buying it off of Amazon just like I did with my only paperback (as of now), "Masters of Mayhem," back in January. Also, there was a strip called "Operation: Altered Ego," from the paperback "The Third Dossier of Spy vs. Spy," where White plays a really cruel (and very disturbing) prank on Black after the former read "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde." This results in Black turning into a Mr. Hyde version of himself and ends up being taken to the nut house, all thanks to White using his love for literature to his own advantage despite that it has been used against him on other multiple occasions. That incident is proof that White has set up harsher, more callous, and disturbing traps for Black, and I am not surprised as I am beyond positive that this obviously isn't the only time he has pulled even more callous pranks on Black; remember what he did in "Operation: Maid of Steel" (which was made into animated short towards the end of the first season of MADtv 23-24 years later) from the same paperback?

Anyway, this is my point and I am dead serious: stop calling White Spy wholesome, pure, and good because I have evidence that proves otherwise! He may be great with animals (*cough**cough*Operation: Operation*cough**cough*) and can be a softy deep down inside, which shows that he does have standards, but that does not mean he is pure and wholesome!

No, I am not defending Black Spy either. Though I am sure he probably has standards as well, and might be a softy deep down inside, too. I mean, according to the wiki (which may not be 100% valid, of course, though), Black has been shown to be empathetic towards civilians, which is something White usually exploits at any given opportunity. Not to mention that Black also seems to be great with children, apparently. To anybody who loves antagonizing Black Spy, when you say you love White Spy better yet have tons of artwork torturing Black nonstop more than artwork of White, you are openly proving that you're a hypocrite, so why don't y'all do a lot of us this favor: cut the crap and leave Black alone!

This post was not meant to antagonize White Spy; this post was meant to expose him. Neither spy is good nor evil because the comics were not supposed to have the good vs. evil element; they were intended to represent that war is worthless. Both Black Spy and White Spy were meant to be equally sadistic, psychotic, and callous towards each other. Don't get me wrong. I mean, I love both Black Spy and White Spy equally because I think they're both simultaneously adorable and insane at the same time. Either way, I am sick and tired of people portraying one spy as good and the other as evil. I mean, this whole "white is good" and "black is evil" misconception and stereotype is nothing but a bunch of stupid crap. Seriously, this whole good vs. evil element headcanon in the Spy vs. Spy fandom gets on my nerves and it needs to end NOW.

I do not claim ownership of any content. Spy vs. Spy belongs to the defunct MAD Magazine and the late, great Antonio Prohías.

[in-halingstardust]

Hi! May I request an HSR match? My spice tolerance is mid 😅

She/her, Gemini, Intp, 5w4

Asexual/heteromantic

Chaotic Good

Appearance: 164cm. Brown wavy hair, dark Brown eyes. Curvy body I guess? I'm pale with visible beauty marks like on my lips. I wear glasses/sunglasses. I've been described as cute and a tease because I always bite my lips out of habit lol. I often have a tired/annoyed expression or a smile. I wear comfy clothes and even pj outside. Or cliché villain clothes, no in between. I try to wear gloves to stop myself from bitting my nails.

I appear as cold and very sarcastic. But I can be charismatic when I want. I'm always polite unless I dislike you (you'll know it because I become passive agressive). How I act depends on how you act with me, unless I'm in a bad mood. In that case I isolate to not break hearts too much. I act flirty around my friends and is known for sometimes playing with hearts (I'm oblivious to it). I'm petty and can go very far out of spite or vengeance. I curse a lot and will call you out on your bullshit with no issue no matter who you are.

I'm moody and not a morning person AT ALL. I'm brutally honest and it affected some friendships because people sometimes won't dare to approach me. I'm also socially obvious to a lot of things. I'm very curious and have a short attention spawn.

Getting along with me is easy peasy. As long as you're not whiny or a hypocrite we will get along. Now getting to know me is....nearly impossible. No friend of mine has managed to make me spill my problems even thought they share theirs and I help them out. My trust issues and daddy issues are too important for that lol. I don't open up and bottle my feelings all the time till I shut down or explode. I isolate a lot when I have problems or I'm just thinking (I love daydreaming). I'm rebellious but also a smooth talker. My friends know I have good intentions and would never wrong an innocent person. I'm the smart but reckless friend cuz I'll always hype up bad ideas for fun. I can be a bit naive. Even thought I have morbid curiosity and shared dubious experimental ideas....morals ain't my Forte. I'm more logical than emotional. I'm ambitious and can't stand my own failure. But I'm also lazy and a procrastinator which is a terrible combo. I'm always willing to debate and learn new things because knowledge is very important to me. I'm creative and innovative, I know when to get to business. I'm very competitive and try to hide it. Yeah I have an ego, so what? if you don't have a solid argument with me, I'll destroy you.

Despite that, I joke a lot and never take anything seriously. It happens that I underestimate people (I beat them later sooo). I'm a big tease and love to rile up people and see them get angry. I subtly insult people when they piss me off.

Because of that, I get very lonely and I'm misunderstood. I don't recognize my own feelings and mask that pretty well as it fools everyone. i don't consider myself to be a good person for some reasons. I envy easily and get annoyed easily because I want to succeed above all lol. Oh and I love money. I like gifting my friends and receiving gifts.

Hobbies: Reading (mystery, thriller, fantasy), true crime, video games, manga, drawing, baking, fighting sports (sparing and shooting), learning, daydreaming. I love space and mad scientists stories. My aesthetic is definitely related to those subjects as well as the sea and stars.

I'm insecure about my weight despite not being overweight.

In a relationship, I'm the most chill person. I don't get jealous or clingy. You can do whatever you want. I'm always here to give you advices because helping you out, giving you my time and giving you gifts is my love langage. It bothered my last boyfriend because he thought I wasn't emotionally present and isolated a lot (which I did. I warned him that I accepted out of boredroom and didn't love him but he still went ahead. Then he emotionally cheated on my bd and everyone noticed but me lol. I separated from those friends cuz none told me and I value honesty a lot). I love cuddles but I'll take time to accept physical touch. I enjoy a partner that can keep up with me and be patient and honest because I value honesty. I also love receiving gifts because uh...I grew up with them validating love. I hate whiny and cowardly people. I don't fall first and don't make the first move.

I speak Arabic, French and English. I'm an only child. I study electronics and want to work in space related studies.

Thank you!

Girl... like sincerely, if you need anything DM me. I slap your ex friends/relationship so hard for you. This may be different than usual so let me know if this isn't what you want and if I can fix it! ♡♡♡

This might be a little different, but I’m going to pair you with Blade. 

❥ If we are talking about someone who wears his little, tiny, miniscule heart on his sleeve I’d pick Blade. I feel your relationship would thrive upon honesty through actions rather than words. No wondering about the next move, no hesitation, it will be very different to say the least.

❥ To explain it, it’s more about the will that you both possess. The drive to accomplish whether those demands are wrong or right. The similarity between objectives no matter how concluded the path may be.

❥ So when Blade asks you to be in a ‘partnership’ with him, you are quite taken aback.

❥ It’s not the most romantic ‘partnership’ such as hugs and kisses, affectionate PDA; but, for some reason, Blade is never one to ‘forget’ your favorite type of flowers. It was just on way back, don't think too much of it. Never forget the type of pencils you like for sketching, don't forget the multitude of facts you spew as you both stare at the stars in the sky. Your hand draws constellations as if you can touch them. ❥ Your ‘partnership’ slowly evolves over time to something that passersby would call romantic. Maybe it's the way he is always close to you on rainy days, holding the umbrella with your heat radiating into him. ❥ Sometimes after those cold walks you ask him to warm you up. He gives a small scowl until he lifts you onto the kitchen counter. Your legs wrapping around his waist as he pins you against the cabinet's lips finding yours. Chase kisses turn deeper and you feel your head spinning around in stars.

[aqg-arts]

Anyone wanna my 2 cents on Jade Shadows?

Spoilers bellow frens ;3

So, right off the bat (before I put my personal personal thoughts out there), we need to acknowledge the criticism and outright discomfort this quest had.

Some of the criticism this quest got is something I can agree with. Specifically; Jade Shadow's needed more time. 100%. Let them cook, or more importantly, let the story cook and maybe even burn a bit to give us some crispy, smokin hot parts.

The little footnote at the end of the quest saying we have 'more questions than answers'? We get it, you're self-conscious, but that doesn't give you an excuse for not giving me Stalker. PERIOD, BITCH.

Jest aside, srsly, we needed to know more about Jade, Stalker, what happened to them, baby Orion (Halo possessed me in that moment, iykyk), etc. People needed to get invested in the characters, especially because this is a quest so close to being like Sacrifice on its level of storytelling...

Had it been able to have just 30+ minutes longer.

Onto the 2nd part of the criticism, birthing sim:

I'll be honest, as someone who was thinking of even going into being a midwifery/allied health, it didn't freak me out as much as it did others. But that's just one side of it. The other is how people say Jade's agency was ignored.

I'll be honest, this is just wrong. It's not media illiteracy by any means, but rather pure ignorance. Why?

Because her agency is declared.

When?

"... you're going to be a father." OH, and the fact she literally wanted the baby. There are plenty of people who can explain it better than that, and whilst I acknowledge people may feel this way, this was, in fact, not what happened.

Also, this quest is not pro-life, nor is it anything related to that. If it was, I assure you, you would have a majority of the fan base up and walk. Take a chill pill. If you want to attack something for being pro-life, go help out at an abortion clinic with crowd control or smth. Because once you see that, you'll understand just how wrong you are.

It's not subtle.

It's not in between the lines.

It doesn't exist.

The end. Period. Fullstop.

The criticism is fair, but going so far as to say those are the undertones is just not on. Not only are you lying about something, but you are also disrespecting the very real women whom have had their agency denied in one way or another.

Now, that's not the only criticism about it, but those are just a few things you may see floating on tumblr. Again, both are ok and fair. But when you start to spread lies or ignore what actually happened, you're part of the problem, not the solution.

Now, onto the fun stuff!

Imo, aside from what was stated before, the quest was actually pretty fun and interesting. The pair make an interesting concept, especially now with the lil fugly bean, which has stolen a place in my cold, brainrotted heart. I think I like the Corpus Cap the most- pls marry me, pls. Oh, an Hunhow? Let me hug him. Let me give him a home on my ships. Let me tell him he can be my bestie!!!

Back to Stalker, though, I really hope we see more of him, especially now he's git a VA.

Speaking of, homie didn't get to speak often, but God did it hit home when he did. You can feel how desperate he is, then when he gets his answers, how lost he is. Finally, resolution and love ehen he names his lil kid at the end.

Music was on point, too. I can't listen to it tho bc Ik ima be sobbing lol. It was so beautiful!!!!!!!

Lorewise, however, I have so many fucking questions, but in the funny haha/good way.

Was jade pregnant b4 being a wf? If not, Stalker...

Why was their relationship shamed upon? Was Jade a Dax and him, well, him? Or was it because they weren't married? What was it that made the Orokin make em into Warframes? Also, Ballas, man, we know your hypocritical ass is in this shit too.

Also, Umbra and Helminth are confirmed to roam around the Orbiter, and vc Umbra is my main, this is a personal achievement. Now let us see it happen, and I'll be DE's 4 life.

But seriously, TL;DR:

Jade Shadow's was a good quest, it just needed to cook slightly longer. And, until we get more Umbra x Stalker from DE (bros b4 all), I'll be on AO3 in 3 (maybe 4) tags.

See in the next Stalker stan post :)

[readingrebloggingreliving]

Stuck

Summery: Finn has been stuck in this coffin for a thousand years. And nothing can ever be easy. Never.

Word Count: 792

A/N: First attempt at this so honestly I may rewrite this later but it's been stuck in my head because of a conversation with @crimsonlyinglilly so...have my first attempt.

Finn doesn't know when it started. When the darkness, the calm nothing became him stuck. Him hearing everything but unable to join, not able to touch, talk or see. Stuck with being able to hear and smell. Stuck in this torture seeing Why

The first thing he does remember being so clear is another brother's voice. Elijah. Talking of their travelling. Of some group he'd began with his sired. How Klaus made him abandon them. As that had trailed off he. Felt a hand move fixing clothes against dead yet so sensitive skin. "I wish I could wake you brother. I do so hate to see you like this. But... I can't. Niklaus would take it as a personal slight. And perhaps it's better for you as well. You never truly did like what we are. I hope the darkness is kinder to you." His voice was honest. Genuine.

But it made him scream mentally. It was the most obvious sign that he was still here because of his brother. Klaus. Klaus put him here. In the darkness. Stuck in his mind. He wanted to call out in denial as Elijahs footsteps lead away from him. Desperate for Some level of connection to the outside world. To life.

He always heard as his siblings approached or left. Following them around the house, the only thing he still had left. Klaus was the one who talked to him most. He never had an apology for his predicament like Elijah did more often than not. Nor was he really addressed. Klaus simply seemed to use him as a sound board. Ranting about their siblings about enemies and plans gone wrong.

Rebekah's voice was calm and almost a balm in comparison. She'd tell him of things he was missing as much as complaining of the newest love that Klaus had killed or compelled away. So at least he felt like he was connecting Somehow.

"You know. I have a plan." Kol had started. It was almost a surprise. Kol never spoke to him. "There's this magic. It can turn silver to gold. So we can change one of the daggers to gold and let Nik have a taste of his own medicine!" His voice was bouncy, excited. Like it used to be when he was young. When mother was teaching them of new magic or spells. He'd missed that, even just from afar. "I just need to find a big enough stone." He said and Finn could hear him pacing and then sigh. "When it works brother. I'll drag that dagger from your chest. And we'll go our separate ways. As we should have all those years ago. Always and forever be damned."

There was a spark of hope, light hitting his chest at the words.

Those were quickly burnt out hearing Elijah talking. But it wasn't to him.

"Kol. You can't imagine Rebekah would stand against Niklaus. And not could I be seen to. Why not keep it to yourself. You know better." He'd said softly. Finn would laugh if he could. 'be seen to' as if Elijah would ever fight Klaus. "I'm sure your plan was sound. Except if he ever woke. He'd have attempted to kill us all if we helped." A flicker of doubt hit Finn. Perhaps Elijah would help them. "Until you wake again." Elijah said lightly and the lid of a coffin closed.

Kol had been woken again and this time Elijahs speech was different. " I see a change in him. For the first time in centuries, he acted solely for the benefit of another. I believe that young Marcellus, with whom he can identify and even nurture, holds the key to our brother's troubled soul. Unfortunately, Kol, your wretched behavior will only serve to distract him from this auspicious path. Now, you might well consider me a hypocrite to betray you as I have. For his sake, you must sleep. Even I must make certain sacrifices, if, indeed, we are to preserve the precious bond between Niklaus and that child."

Finn was struck by that dull disappointment once more. Elijah was his hope. And as it stands? He was never getting out of this darkness.

Until he did.

The fight between Elijah and Klaus. The admitting to their mothers murder. The rage he felt burnt through his system and the Relief as that dagger was dragged from his chest to see his brother above him, explaining, in hushed whispers, the plan.

The idea of their family being a family but removing Klaus. Leaving him behind. The four of them together at some level of peace sounded wonderful. Hopefully with Elijah on their side finally. They'd be fine.

Perhaps he could find Sage. If she was still alive, see if she'd allow him another chance.

[mikasa-imadebiscults]

Hello! May I have a romantic adult matchups for JJK and Kny?

She/her

Gemini

Intp

5w4

Asexual/heteromantic

Chaotic Good

Appearance: 164cm. Brown wavy hair, dark Brown eyes. Curvy body I guess? I'm pale with visible beauty marks like on my lips. I wear glasses/sunglasses. I've been described as cute and a tease because I always bite my lips out of habit lol. I often have a tired/annoyed expression or a smile. I wear comfy clothes and even pj outside. Or cliché villain clothes, no in between. I try to wear gloves to stop myself from bitting my nails.

I appear as cold and very sarcastic. But I can be charismatic when I want. I'm always polite unless I dislike you (you'll know it because I become passive agressive). How I act depends on how you act with me, unless I'm in a bad mood. In that case I isolate to not break hearts too much. I act flirty around my friends and is known for sometimes playing with hearts (I'm oblivious to it). I'm petty and can go very far out of spite or vengeance. I curse a lot and will call you out on your bullshit with no issue no matter who you are.

I'm moody and not a morning person AT ALL. I'm brutally honest and it affected some friendships because people sometimes won't dare to approach me. I'm also socially obvious to a lot of things. I'm very curious and have a short attention spawn.

Getting along with me is easy peasy. As long as you're not whiny or a hypocrite we will get along. Now getting to know me is....nearly impossible. No friend of mine has managed to make me spill my problems even thought they share theirs and I help them out. My trust issues and daddy issues are too important for that lol. I don't open up and bottle my feelings all the time till I shut down or explode. I isolate a lot when I have problems or I'm just thinking (I love daydreaming). I'm rebellious but also a smooth talker. My friends know I have good intentions and would never wrong an innocent person. I'm the smart but reckless friend cuz I'll always hype up bad ideas for fun. I can be a bit naive. Even thought I have morbid curiosity and shared dubious experimental ideas....morals ain't my Forte. I'm more logical than emotional. I'm ambitious and can't stand my own failure. But I'm also lazy and a procrastinator which is a terrible combo. I'm always willing to debate and learn new things because knowledge is very important to me. I'm creative and innovative, I know when to get to business. I'm very competitive and try to hide it. Yeah I have an ego, so what? if you don't have a solid argument with me, I'll destroy you.

Despite that, I joke a lot and never take anything seriously. It happens that I underestimate people (I beat them later sooo). I'm a big tease and love to rile up people and see them get angry. I subtly insult people when they piss me off.

Because of that, I get very lonely and I'm misunderstood. I don't recognize my own feelings and mask that pretty well as it fools everyone. i don't consider myself to be a good person for some reasons. I envy easily and get annoyed easily because I want to succeed above all lol.

Hobbies: Reading (mystery, thriller, fantasy), true crime, video games, manga, drawing, baking, fighting sports (sparing and shooting), learning, daydreaming. I love space and mad scientists stories. My aesthetic is definitely related to those subjects as well as the sea and stars.

I'm insecure about my weight despite not being overweight.

In a relationship, I'm the most chill person. I don't get jealous or clingy. You can do whatever you want. I'm always here to give you advices because helping you out, giving you my time and giving you gifts is my love langage. It bothered my last boyfriend because he thought I wasn't emotionally present and isolated a lot (which I did. I warned him that I accepted out of boredroom and didn't love him but he still went ahead. Then he emotionally cheated on my bd and everyone noticed but me lol. I separated from those friends cuz none told me and I value honesty a lot). I love cuddles but I'll take time to accept physical touch. I enjoy a partner that can keep up with me and be patient and honest because I value honesty. I also love receiving gifts because uh...I grew up with them validating love. I hate whiny and cowardly people.

I speak Arabic, French and English. I'm an only child. I study electronics and want to work in space related studies.

Thank you!

(Hello there! I hope you enjoyed this and have a great day/night!)

I match you with..

Gyomei Himejima

- He’s a very patient and honest person.

- He won’t pry about any of your problems because he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable.

- Once you feel comfortable with physical affection, he’ll happily cuddle with you for as long as you want. He prefers to cuddle when you’re ready to go to bed, so that you can sleep in his arms.

- He helps you spar, he’s hesitant about you sparring with him because he’s afraid that he’ll hurt you really bad.

- Loves your homemade baked goods. He thinks you bake really well.

- He’s a good listener and he’ll reassure you that you can come to him anytime about your problems and he’ll do his best to help you out.

- He likes to listen to you talk about your interests. For example, you telling him about the most recent chapter you’ve read, what you drew that day, etc.

Gojo Satoru

- No matter how hard it is to get to know you, he is determined. He’s also not scared off by your cold appearance or your brutal honesty.

- When he finds out that you love receiving gifts, the gifts will keep on coming (prepare to get spoiled)

- He also likes quality time with you, even if it’s the both of you just chilling around each other.

- Whenever you are reading next to him and he gets bored, he’ll sigh very dramatically to see if you’ll give him any attention.

- Sometimes you’ll find your glasses missing and when you go looking for them you’ll see them on him.

- It took him by surprise the first time that you flirted with him, but he instantly flirted back.

- He loves your rebellious side. The two of you get so chaotic sometimes and the others are so done with y’all’s shit lmao.

Masterlist

[delicate-bliss]

𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐞 𝐑𝐞𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞

[Personal Note] - Hey friend, its been a while since I posted here! I've been taking time to grow closer to God. I have discovered a passion for ministry, so this blog definitely helps me grow in that area. My only goal here is to help others know more about God! Now, back to the post:

Hmm... true repentance, what is it? Before I answer this question, let me give an example.

"Oh no, I sinned again! I know I said I wouldn't do it again, but I just gave in because I figured one more time wouldn't hurt. I feel bad, but God will forgive me again because he always forgives."

My friend, if this is your mindset, this is not repenting; this is taking advantage of God's grace. I would be a hypocrite if I said I haven't done this. During my walk with God, I have done this many times but it only kept me stuck in complacency longer. I had heard many sermons about repenting, I always thought it was just saying sorry to God because you felt guilty after sinning. It took me a while to learn that it involves not only acknowledging your sin and asking for forgiveness, but also involves action!

“Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.”

‭‭ - James‬ ‭2‬:‭17‬ ‭NKJV‬

We can't just sit and expect things to change! I'll be honest, I'm very guilty of this! I'm starting to come out of that mindset of "Im content with where I am with God.", and i pray for those who may also be struggling with this. So, heres a list of things I personally learned on how to truly repent:

1. Acknowledgment - acknowledge the sin committed as sin

2. Prayer - ask God for forgiveness, but also to show you a solution to solve the problem!

3. Solution - walk with God to find the root of the sin so you can unroot it from your life.

4. Remove temptations - close those open doors of that sin; cut off anything that may tempt you to recommit that sin. (whether it be certain objects, websites, etc.)

5. Reach out - You are not alone in this journey, reach out to someone close who can help with accountability!

6. Remember that Jesus loves you and He is cheering you on! He will never leave or forsake you ever. No sin is too big for Him to handle!

Remember, repentance is not a one time thing, it is a daily walk. Christ says we must die to ourselves daily to walk with Him, and this is part of that! The longer you walk, the less that sin will feel good. To quote an article I read, "The sinner turns away from sin toward faith in the Savior, and that faith is shown in action"(GotQuestions app) When you repent and have that change within your heart, God starts to move in your life more. He will draw closer to you as you draw closer to Him!

“Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”

‭‭ - James‬ ‭4‬:‭8‬ ‭NKJV‬

It can be a struggle though, believe me when I say it can be hard some days. Keep up the fight! Because in the end it is so so so worth it.

[randomluck-ofthe-universe]

Yes, I’m looking at his face and I’m really confused, or better said “disoriented” (insert sarcastic laugh)

I still can’t believe how seeing these new photos didn’t make me feel anything, or worse- i didn’t want to look at them for too long like I used before.

He has the huge privilege to be born with this face - beautiful, innocent, forever young-ish, etc. And exactly like you said - no one knows what’s behind this face, what his life is.

Everything you imagine him to be is dictated by his appearance and you all assume exactly that - that he is an innocent, sincere, smart and selfless boy, not capable of anything bad and malicious. And it never occurs to you that what you constantly repeat - that no one knows what he really is, what he wants and how he lives - is absolutely true, but with the opposite sign. That it is possible that he is completely different from the boy that his appearance fools you into being.

Please don’t be mad at me, I’m actually devastated that I don’t love him (like a fan) the way I used to 💔

But like is said - no one can kill your love faster and more completely than the object of your love itself 💔

Why would I be mad at you? you came here telling me your thoughts, how you feel about Tim right now, how this hurts you, and you did it honestly without being rude or offensive, and for all this I respect you and I'm glad you are here. believe me, I understand how you're experiencing this moment even though I don't share the way you see him now.

so I'll be honest with you about what I think of Tim just like you have been with me.

I've never said or thought that he's innocent and perfect because none of us is so and Timothée Chalamet is no exception. he's not an untouchable god, he's a human being with his flaws, a person who makes mistakes like the rest of us, who sometimes does shit and can make decisions because of which he'll pay the consequences. who of us hasn't done it more than once in their lives?

but I also think his life is not so easy and going all downhill as it might seem, almost like a kind of perfect life made only of things, moments and positive situations.

I think we can't keep pretending that his life was the same as it was seven years ago and that we want at all costs that he's the exact same 20-year-old boy. this is something unreal and absurd, the same way none of us remains totally the same but it's life itself, every experience you have and some situations you live that pass above you forging and making small changes.

and yes, I repeat once again that I know nothing of his personal life, I don't know why I see him making choices or making decisions about which I don't understand and I can be perplexed, they may even hurt me, but that's precisely the reason why I'm not able to judge him or erase him or stop loving him.. it's his life, not mine, and if I don't know his reasons, rightly because it's none of my business, how can I make him guilty of what I feel?

but if there's one thing I'll never believe, it's that Tim is a fake person, a hypocrite who all these years has been pretending to be someone he never was.

if ever he had a fault it was always to be too transparent, too open to show what he feels at that exact moment, totally unable to pretend and mask his mood.

too vulnerability.

and over the years you learn to protect yourself, you've to do it. you've to do it for yourself and above all to protect some aspects of your personal life, the "real private life" and not the one that "for work" you've to show.

And you can see what's behind his face, it's one of the things he's still not able to keep "private" because you look at him and immediately see if he's happy, if he's relaxed, if he's angry or he's uncomfortable, if he feels bad.

you may not know anything about his life, but his face tells you about him and how he's in that moment.. the way how he feels about the person that is with him, how he's experiencing that situation.

I think dealing with many professional experiences and personal situations, growing up and becoming a man have definitely made changes to him but they haven't changed who he really is inside.

I'm truly sorry that you feel so devastated.. if you want, you can also contact me privately and feel sure that our conversation will remain absolutely private.

Anyway, I’m here. ❤️

[hoes4hoseok]

txt as emails i can't send

enhypen version ☆ sour version ☆ masterlist

"i'm gonna see sabrina today YAY <3"...is what i wrote as the caption for this in APRIL when i started writing this. she was AMAZING though. enjoy!

beomgyu as read your mind

"you say that you wanna be alone, but night & day, want me at your beck & call"

beomgyu is 100% cryptic but (hopefully) only until you actually start dating

so it might be very hard to read him & figure out whether or not he wants you

he definitely thinks of a partnership as a team (as he should)

but...he might have trouble doing that if he hasn't dated anyone in a hot minute

(yikes)

i think he'd be kinda unintentionally hypocritical & be like "just tell me" when you're hiding something from him

&& then turn around & do the same thing LOL

hueningkai as already over

"how am i supposed to close the door when i still need the closure?"

something about the yeehaw energy in this song screams hueningkai to me

but beyond that, i low-key think hueningkai wouldn't have the guts to break up with you

&& i don't mean that solely in a the way that he strings you along, but rather the "i like you a lot so i'll keep making out with you but this is not working & we both know it" way

you could sense it too but you'd kind of be the same way 😭

that's not healthy though!! we all know that right?!

yeonjun as bet u wanna

"hurts to see me out of your reach, bet you wanna touch me now"

i can see this going both ways, no matter who dumped who, one of y'all would probably regret it!!

if it was you regretted it, it would be sparked by just seeing him him again

whereas i can picture yeonjun having terrible timing and realizing he still wanted you after you were already moving on with someone else

either way, you would not get back together after this fiasco. because damn.

also. something about the yeehaw energy in THIS song screams YEONJUN to me.

soobin as skinny dipping

"it'd be so nice, right? right? if we could take it all off & just exist"

soobin wouldn't want to go no-contact after your break up, but that's just how it works out sometimes

it's hard to see someone you still love & not be with them!

so naturally, you'd stop going to your coffee shop at the same time & texting him about your family drama

but you'd miss each other

so naturally, you'd think a lot about meeting him again under different circumstances when you could forget about the unintentional pain you caused each other

i think if you did meet each other in the future, friendship would definitely be on the table

&& maybe more further down the line :)

taehyun as things i wish you said

"i waste my time, i waste my life on idiotic things, like things you never said, things you'll never say to me"

taehyun may be honest with you when you break up but,, that doesn't mean that the truth is what you want to hear

so he'd tell you as much of the truth he thinks you can "handle" but that just hurts you more because you fill in the gaps yourself

&& afterward you'd just kind of be hoping it's hurting him as much as it's hurting you

when it isn't — & you have to remind yourself that he would have told you if it did

but really,, would he?

enhypen version ☆ sour version ☆ masterlist