#because Louis just can't stop pining for Legosi it seems

[legosi-and-louis-are-in-love]

What if Louis had went to Legosi for comfort tho...

Louis stood in front of a drab, rusted metal door. It looked so appropriately plain he couldn’t help but think to smile. His mouth didn’t receive the message, though.

The past few days had been hell for him, to say the least. He couldn’t get the faces in the crowd he had seen at the funeral out of his head. He did not recognize a single one of them aside from the butlers, and aside from them not a single one of those faces seemed to hold any grief. Was he doomed to follow in his father’s footsteps and die with no friends or loved ones? 

He recalled that this was the train of thought that brought him here, into this ancient rotting building his closest friend called home. He had never been inside but he knew where it was, and a quick inquiry at the desk had brought him to the appropriate room. It was late enough that he was sure the wolf was home, although no sounds emanated from the room to suggest this. 

He had fought the impulse at first. Legosi was busy training. He needed to focus if he was going to win this thing and live. Louis desperately didn’t want Legosi to rely on his other leg. Louis needed to give him space and keep the wolf’s head in the game. Even if it burned him to the core thinking about how quickly he had become attached to his long lost childhood friend who now gave him no time of day. 

This was probably the other thought that brought him here. He remembered last year when he derided Juno for being selfish, and she asked him why that was seen as a bad thing. That memory pushed the switch in his mind from ‘no’ to ‘yes’ when he asked himself if he could go see Legosi. He was selfish. He needed to be with someone else right now. 

He looked down at his emaciated form, holding his hands up and staring at them. His right hand clenched and moved forward. Slowly but surely, it inched toward the door until it made contact noiselessly. Why was he so nervous? If anything, Legosi always seemed to be the nervous one around him. He couldn’t even imagine what it must be like to talk to an animal you had eaten a part of. Was it torture for Legosi to be around him? Was this all a big mistake?

No. Louis was selfish. He knocked once, and a thud soon resounded from behind the door. What followed were sounds of scrambling and claws on wood and soft grumbles. His mouth finally caught the signal from before and formed a smile. 

The wolf that opened the door had very obviously just woken up. Legosi wore an old t-shirt that he either outgrew or had shrunk in the wash, exposing his soft, fuzzy stomach. Below he wore a simple pair of briefs. His expression turned from tired to tired-yet-surprised when he realized who was in front of him. 

“L-Louis-san? Uh...hi! This isn’t...well it’s not...you...” 

Louis simply crossed his arms and let the wolf try and figure out what he wanted to say. He was gesticulating frantically, a trademark of his. 

“...s-so you see, I wasn’t expecting company, so I don’t have anything to offer you or...” 

Louis decided he had let him suffer long enough. With a raise of his slender hand, he hushed the mutt up. “It’s fine. Can we talk?”

Legosi’s irises dilated slightly. “Sure!” He proceeded to not move. 

“...inside?”, Louis suggested. 

Defeated, Legosi’s ears wilted slightly. “Okay...” He turned around, and Louis noticed his tail wagging lightly. Legosi could have a good pokerface sometimes, but never a good pokerbutt. 

Louis commended himself silently for his little joke. 

As Legosi had said, the place was a bit of a mess. What little clothes in his possession laid haphazardly along the floor and across some furniture, as they had likely not been picked up when they had been stripped off the wolf’s body. A recently used futon lay in the corner, and immediately to Louis’s right was a stove, minifridge, and small cabinet. Aside from the small table in the center of the room, that’s all Legosi’s home consisted of. 

Louis walked over to the only zabuton by the table and sat upon it, leaving Legosi to stand awkwardly for a moment before he opened the cabinet in the “kitchen” area and pulled out a box of crackers and a paper plate.  “It’s fine, Legosi. I’m not hungry.” 

“Your stomach is growling.” Legosi looked at him with concern, and Louis attempted to cover up his body. 

A few seconds later, the gracious feast was placed on the table, and Legosi sat upon his bed, facing Louis. He looked expectantly at him. Louis grabbed a cracker and nibbled at it.

“So, what did you want to talk about, Louis-san?”

Louis placed the barely eaten cracker down. “Well, I just wanted to check in and see how the training is going.” 

Legosi’s ears twitched. “Oh! Well, I think it’s going well. Knowing Kyuu-san trained with Gouhin-san gives us a connection. I still don’t think I can hit her, though...”

Louis wanted to cover his ears and scream. Why did he have to ask that question? It was time to switch gears. “So, this dump, eh?” 

Legosi cocked his head, unprepared for the sudden subject change. “Well, it’s about the only place I can afford. I had to get rid of my cell phone to even afford it consistently...” 

“So that’s why you never asked for my number? We need an easier way to contact each other.” Louis felt lightheaded as he said this. He reached back for his unfinished cracker. 

Legosi stared for a moment. “So, you’ve thought about trying to become a Beastar with me?” 

Louis finished the cracker. “Sure. We should at least lay some groundwork, no?” “Well, there’s a landline in the lobby you can contact me with.”

“Alright, old man.”

Louis ate from the plate as the room entered silence. Legosi played with the covers beneath him as he very obviously tried not to stare at Louis’s prosthesis, which was showing from where his pant leg was being pulled up by his sitting position. 

“My dad died a week ago.” 

Both animals held a shocked expression. Louis covered his mouth and looked away. Legosi was on his hands and knees, but still kept his distance. 

“Wh-wh-wh-why didn’t you tell me? Are you okay? Do you need anything? Did you have the funeral already? How did it happen?”

The wolf’s endless questions turned into a buzz in Louis’s ears. He just stared blankly at him, feeling numb. 

It took a while before he realized Legosi had stopped talking. “It was a car accident. I had to arrange the funeral and pick up all his business dealings. I’m the CEO of Horns now.” He delivered the information in a monotone voice, trying to distance himself from it. 

“I-is that why you look so sick?” Legosi, blunt as always. 

“I suppose.” 

“You need help! Maybe a doctor! Is anybody helping you? You should have told me!” 

Louis stared back, noting how Legosi still positioned himself too far away to make contact. He noted his large hands lifting off the floor a few times, but they always found their way back to their original position. He recalled the first Adler performance when he had woken up in the nurse’s office. Weak and frail. Was that how Legosi was seeing him right now. 

The image in his mind shifted. Now they were atop a concrete slab outcropped from a bridge on a cold, winter night. Legosi bleeding heavily. The warm feeling in the deer’s eyes back then returned. The wolf in front of him blurred. 

Dammit, what was it about him that brought this disgusting feeling? 

Seeing the tears drop from the deer’s face caused Legosi’s arms to raise up farther, and he scootched forward on his knees slightly, but alas, he remained out of reach. Louis stayed planted on the zabuton, crying silently. 

“Wh-what should I do, Louis-san? Please, tell me what I should do!” Legosi sounded desperate now, and Louis equally so. 

“Wh-what can you do?”, he managed through the tears. 

“Yes!” 

Louis looked Legosi straight in the eyes, brows furrowing, teeth and fists clenched. 

“COMFORT ME, GODDAMMIT!” 

Pure surprise washed over Legosi’s face, and Louis buried his own in his hands. It was pointless. Legosi couldn’t be what Louis wanted. What he denied he craved. Every time he stared at his large, carnivore body, he disgustingly felt safety instead of danger. He had continuously tried to deny his affinity for carnivores. It was a spit in the face to the suffering he had endured as a child. At best, he should hold power over carnivores to assert his strength. Protection and affection were desires best left in his subconscious. He needed to leave. 

Fortunately, Louis found he couldn’t move. He opened his eyes and now found himself tucked snugly between Legosi’s legs. The wolf sat cross-legged on the futon, enveloping the deer as best he could with his limbs while also being conscious of his antlers. His cold nose pressed onto the sensitive spot where his neck met his shoulder, causing Louis to shiver and grip at the soft, gray fur of his best friend. 

The sobbing started. “I-I miss him, Legosi! I miss him so fucking much! I never thought I could miss him this much!” 

“I know, Louis-san! It’s okay, I have you! You’re okay!” 

Louis choked and gasped. It was amazing, the feeling of Legosi around him. It was something he had unconsciously been desiring ever since that night he and the Shishigumi had found Legosi snooping around in the Black Market. He now understood why he had let that hug go uninterrupted for more than a few seconds. He wouldn’t make the same mistake pf pushing him away this time. 

Even if he tried, it would have been fruitless. The wolf had a firm grip on him. If he had been prey, he would have been dead. Louis dragged his snot-filled nose across Legosi’s neck, making pitiful noises. Only Legosi could see this side of him. Just as he had on New Year’s. It was only appropriate. 

The light-headedness returned, and Louis saw stars. His arms turned cold as he felt himself go limp. 

~       

Louis awoke to the sound of a tea kettle whistling. His head was propped up a bit more than it should have been. The blanket covering him was soft and smelled bad. He looked to his left, and saw Legosi at his oven, pouring hot water into a cup. He perked up when he saw Louis.

“Oh, thank goodness! You’re awake! Here, I have some tea!” 

Louis tried to sit up but found he was unable to. Legosi noticed this and went to his side, crouching down and holding the cup down. 

Louis stared down at it, feeling the steam on his nose. “I-it’s too hot, Legosi.” 

Legosi whined softly and sat down, holding the tiny cup humorously with both of his huge hands. “I got this tea from Sebun-san. She’s my neighbor. She’s taught me a lot about adult living.” 

Louis laid his head back as Legosi anxiously rambled. He was well aware of the burden he had placed on the wolf now. But he was selfish, so he tried not to care. The warmth of being held so close returned to his mind. It hadn’t just been a dream. A wall in their relationship crumbled. 

“I’ll try that tea now, Legosi.” 

“Oh, y-yeah! Sorry.” 

The tea tasted bitter, unsurprisingly. Louis never was a fan. He drank down the whole cup, letting the warmth run through him. Not as warm as Legosi had been, sadly. 

“You should rest here for the night.” Legosi stood up and went back to the kitchen area, cleaning up. Louis’s eyes followed him, and he noted the rest of the room had been tidied up as well. He felt his heart suddenly hammer in his chest. 

“What about you?” 

Legosi looked back at his guest. “I can stay at my neighbor Zaguān’s place. He lives a floor above me. It’ll be fine.” 

The warmth granted from the tea left Louis’s body. “Legosi.” 

He turned to face Louis fully, looking attentive and concerned. “Yes?”

Louis swallowed, and a shaky arm pulled the covers down as he moved his body toward the wall. “Sleep next to me.” 

Legosi’s face immediately went flush. “A-ah I-I don’t know if that’s such a good idea!” He was trying to repair the wall they had just worked so hard destroying.

But it was a good thing Louis had accepted the selfish side of himself now. He sat up, willing his eyes to convey all the pleading and want he now felt. He armed his tongue and teeth with a potent weapon. The target: an adorably clueless wolf. 

“Please!”

Payload delivered, Legosi stood there speechless. Louis could have sworn he saw tears, but whatever had been there was quickly blinked away. He slowly lumbered over, hands playing with themselves nervously. He towered over the prone deer, mouthing inaudible words. 

Louis looked up at him, smiling weakly. “Please...comfort me...” 

Legosi dropped to his knees, and he slowly slipped under the covers. Louis felt giddy as the heat radiating off of him made contact with his personal space. He had been so alone the past week. He needed someone. He needed Legosi. He needed the most important animal in his life next to him. 

Legosi laid on his side facing him, and Louis turned to do the same. He often forgot just how much bigger this wolf was compared to him, but from that position it was undeniable. He reached down and grabbed one of Legosi’s hands, kneading it with his own. The wolf audibly gulped, sweat forming on his forehead. 

“Hey...relax.” Louis still couldn’t believe Legosi could so reliably look pathetic in situations where he held complete control and power. “You’re not gonna eat me again, right?”

Legosi cleared his throat loudly. “I-it’s not that...” 

“Then what is it?”

Legosi untangled his hand and folded his arms. “Well...remember what we talked about in the hospital?”

Louis tried to recall. “How you defend herbivores mostly because you’re in love with them? Yes, I remember.” He smiled at the absurdity of it all. 

“Well...I mean...you’re an herbivore...and I’m feeling...feeling...” 

Now it was Louis’s turn to turn red. He never thought of himself as an herbivore, or rather, he tried not to. But now that he realized it...

Feeling rather bold, Louis lobbied a question: “So, what? You don’t love me, too?” 

The riskiness of the question was worth it just to hear the high pitched squeak that escaped the wolf’s mouth. 

Louis moved closer to him, unable to control his body now. “After all we’ve been through. Even after saying you want to become Beastar with me and change society to our ideals...you don’t love me?” 

Legosi was now blabbering nonsense, still crossing his arms. Louis scowled and reached for them, trying to pry them apart. Eventually, they untangled and Louis inserted himself into them. 

“Well, Legosi...”, Louis squirmed, as if his body was fighting the vulnerability it was instinctively showing now. “I can’t think of anybody else I love more than you...” 

It was such an obvious statement, but Louis was still shocked that it had left his lips. 

Legosi’s strange nonspeak stopped, and Louis could very clearly feel his heart hammering against his ribcage. The arms around him started to hold him with purpose, and his long legs curled forward, catching Louis’s as they entwined. 

“L-Louis-san...” 

“Yes?”

“I...I do...” 

“...what?”

“...love you.”

Not a noise could be heard for a few moments, aside from the cars outside and the pitter pat of rain against the window. Someone downstairs closed a door a bit too loudly. 

Louis chuckled. “I love you, Legosi.”

Legosi’s own soft laughter joined the deer’s. “I love you, Louis!”

“I love you, Legosi!”

“I love you, Louis! I love you!”

“I love you!” 

The nonsensical back and forth went on for longer than it probably should have, and eventually the enthusiasm and energy in their declarations faltered. Nevertheless, they continued to mumble those same words to each other as they fell asleep embracing each other.