#because I think that's interesting to explore and I have several things I'm working on with elements of that

[ultimate-marysue]

Actually DC fixing Gotham's jailbreak problem or even killing a couple of Batman rogues would be such a breath of fresh air.

The roster is pretty tight as it is, so trying to fit new bad guys without stepping on a pre-existing rogue's niche is kinda hard. The old rogues are fun, we love a classic, but they're also a bit stale. There are only so many times you can re-invent the wheel before you need a break, and since we're shuffling between the same bad guys again and again you don't have enough time to miss them for the most part.

I'm not saying you can't do interesting stuff with the classic rogues, I actually think some of them could make for pretty interesting modern storylines. I just think it comes a point where it's to the detriment of Batman himself. How many times can Joker escape Arkham or Blackgate before you start scratching your head about it. Yes, I actually really like the whole no killing thing. Cassandra Cain is my favorite character, I don't think Batman has to start killing rogues, but he should definitely do something about the constant break outs.

Yes, I know, it's great to bring an old rogue back...but that's only if you're bringing them back from something.

Let Bruce Wayne fix Blackgate penitentiary, let him actually invest in cleaning Arkham and turning it into what's meant to be instead of a torture facility. Now, when he catches a rogue it has stakes. Once most of the old rogues are out, introduce new players taking over the power vacuum. Maybe one of them is in cahoots with police and we need an arc of cleaning the police force (god forbid we make an actual critique of the structure but that's DC for you). Maybe one of them is an anti Bruce Wayne with enough money and resources to keep his criminal and personal lives separate. Give him villains that require detective work to put behind bars! Or just give him villains that fit the new era.

You don't have to keep having the same rogues break out of jail again and again, especially if you're not interested in exploring other philosophies outside of Batman's "Killin is wrong and we can't do anything about how extremely ineffective our jails are nor change society in any meaningful way". The thing is, to keep Batman from stagnating they have to keep jumping the shark which means that Gotham keeps getting worse and worse despite Batman and Bruce's efforts. In fact, it almost seems like he's making things worse.

This post is my answer to that: make things better, give some semi permanent solutions, add new rogues to fill the power vacuum and keep things fresh without needing to have seven active gangs, several meta humans, the mob, ten serial killers, several assassin cults and the Joker all simultaneously active. I know nostalgia sells, but it also makes things worse! Also, I'm only suggesting this because of the direction I perceive DC to be taking with current Batman (which is edgy but a bit more wholesome than the Dark Knight era). If they wanted to go back to noir, super edgy and dark, sure, turn Gotham into a hell hole. But idk, having so many lighthearted issues and comics with way more family stuff (fluff and drama alike) doesn't jibe with the absolutely hopeless state of Gotham.

Idk, maybe someone will tell me "mmmm actually this has been done before" but I just want them to stick to it. Fix Blackgate or I can't take Batman seriously.

[the-physicality]

paige shouting out tash cloud at every opportunity....love that

[musical-chick-13]

I'm the LAST person to suggest that you have to preface every single comment you make about a character/fictional relationship/etc. you like with a reminder that you Know™ it's pRoBLeMaTiC, but I DO question what the point of acting genuinely for real like there were no problems is.

[denizenhardwick]

if i could draw i would put the foxes in milgram.

[wuntrum]

can you speak on your severance s2 opinions? i promise this isnt in bad faith or anything, im just anon bc im shy lol, im genuinely curious

i'm gonna put this under a read more because it's gonna be long but...yeah [scratches head] if YOU the person reading this looooved this season and see nothing you didn't like about it, thats awesome and i'm happy for you. i also liked things in this season, and also its normal to be able to critique things you like, love and light <3 its literally just television

generally, yeah, i found myself disappointed with it. i think the writing this season, both the dialogue and then the actual character/world writing, fell flat and/or seemed like it was completely incongruous with the characters and world that we had seen in season 1. i think something i really appreciated about season 1 is that yes, mark was our main character and the lens we got introduced to both the inside and outside world, but both felt so much BIGGER than just him.

season 2, the entire plot and world and characters bend and contort to make mark like, the center of the universe lol. it's kind of ridiculous, the extent to which the world revolves around him now. it makes the world feel SOOO small. parts of my favorite worldbuilding aspects are seeing how the outside world feels about severance--i think the part where we see how working as a severed employee makes it almost impossible to work anywhere else is great! and in concept i like seeing other towns that have been devastated by lumon's industrialization, though i don't love the execution that we got. so like...everything lumon does is about mark? ALL of it? i know we don't know exactly how long lumon has been operating but like...they've been working on this stuff for longer than two years, lol. like, how many files have dylan completed? irving? petey? that girlie who wrote the lexington letter? is all of their work literally meaningless? like i get that there were people before gemma who failed the tests and they died, sure, but what about when mark started working there? what about the files that irving started and didn't finish, why don't they care about those? ohhhh right, because that's not the one that mark's working on. i get that it'd be a big deal if they got it to work fully once, but surely they'd want to make it work AGAIN, right??? like a science experiment?? i just wish we got like, A nod to other people on the testing floor, because i think the implication is that all of them are working on files connected to…different people, but maybe they're all just different versions of gemma?

honestly all of the innie stuff this season just felt so…idk, aimless? it feels like parts of the building only exist when the writers want them to, and just generally are not interested in exploring anything outside of the romantic aspects for all of these characters. like sure, after the season 1 finale, their asses are not gonna wanna work (EXCEPT FOR WHEN THEY DO? TO MOVE THE PLOT ALONG?), but where's the camaraderie? what about all those other people in O&D, they literally export things to the testing floor, maybe they know about gemma? fundamentally i think the thing that's the most frustrating about innie mark is that they keep telling us that he doesn't care about gemma. which, sure, outie gemma, he doesn't have that same connection with as helly, whatever. but also, he DOES care about her, he literally knows that that's ms casey and that lumon was just going to do what they always do when they fire people????? like s1 mark cared soooo much about his coworkers, ALL OF THEM, even the ones that weren't there anymore—seeing petey and then ms casey get removed was like, a HUGE deal and vital to his growth as a character!!!! and the way that they constructed this whole season basically to remove everyone that isn't mark and helly by the end. lol. i'm honestly shocked that they didn't make a new version of the desk that was just two chairs, like dylan was just excluded from the finale except for when they needed him to come in and hold the door against mr. milchick. again. lol

i don't inherently have a problem with exploring the romantic stuff, i think that could have been done well, but i just don't think it was. and that's primarily because, i think the writing this season for helly was ass! they took away her agency and subjugated her to be just the love interest for mark! especially with the finale, i just feel like the helly i know would've been like mark, what are you doing??? go?!? like she wants to take down lumon, THAT's what will take down lumon! like whatever, mark made the choice that he did, but helly playing along with it makes no fucking senseee. like they want us to think that it's the same ol helly we know and love, they give us crumbs of her anger, like when she's rallying the marching band people or whatever, but again, only when it's plot convenient. WHY WOULD SHE NOT ATTACK JAME? he's like 90???? and helly doesn't like this man???? she has nothing to lose???? fucking THROW something at him helly!!!! the helly that tried to chop her fingers off and hang herself and gave that speech in the s1 finale is not in the room with us. and i don't mean this in a way where i think it's helena again, it's not. they've just completely fumbled her character because they want mark and helly to be together at all costs. and honestly, i think it's so reductive to make this show just about ships, but textually it feels like that's what they want us to do, and i think that's sad. again, it makes the show feel so SMALL, when the world within it used to feel so BIG and like we would want to learn more about it. i care about mark and helly--before they kissed!! i think it was rewarding to see the ways they challenged each other and grew as people!! them as a romantic thing could work but they haven't put in the work to MAKE it work. and, it feels like of redundant even to say, but i do think it's fucking ridiculous to write a story where we get kissing and fucking for allllll the straight characters and then the one gay couple doesn't even get a kiss before separating them completely and writing irving out of the show, basically. like what are we in, hayes code era television?

but yeah, the information they chose to reveal vs what they didn't was also frustrating. i honestly wish they revealed less! there's so much TELLING this season. it feels like they think we're stupid (which, i can't speak for the entire population watching the show, maybe some people literally do need mark to look at the camera and explain everything, idk). like there's sooo much clever storytelling in the first season that just, completely gets snuffed out from overexplaining. i understand in the finale that oMark needs to tell iMark about why he did all of this but like, WE as the audience already know??? we don't need to see this?? and cobel confirming stuff i feel like we already knew about how the numbers work and like, i just don't knowwww. like you can just show me it, i was picking up on it. like we know about the four tempers, you show it to us all the time, cobel having to look dead in the camera and explain it just made me feel like there was a better way we could've done this. i do think some stuff benefits from a "hard" confirmation. like i'm glad they confirmed the helena thing, BECAUSE it backs up and supports all of the lovely and subtle things they had already shown to prove that it WAS helena! like i've known since the first episode LOL, so they do KNOW how to do subtle storytelling. and i think the gemma episode was great, i loved seeing her as a character and thought it gave her so much depth. but again, i think allll of the explaining they do this season not only snuffs out the fun of speculating on the viewing end, but from a writing perspective it just kind of writes them into a corner. i think they're focused too much on making these elaborate set pieces and events take place without thinking of how they fit together, not only on like a writing/episodic level but just the world of lumon at large.

i think a great way they showed story in the first season is through the paintings, and through irving and burt bonding over the paintings! like it not only establishes the lore of kier and then we get to learn more about them as characters through their reactions to the paintings. the paintings this season, honestly, were weak, they were so heavy handed. love and light to whoever painted them, but they were nottt doing the job for me.

(this is a small thing, but like…the intake questionnaire asks them to "name a US state or territory," so they KNOW that delaware is a state. so why would they think the equator is a building? again its just like. a cutesy moment for mark and helly to banter but they could've done it in a way that isn't contradictory to like, our understanding of what information crosses over the sever and what does not).

i keep thinking about the ORTBO, and it just seems fucking CRAZY to me that they aren't freaking out about SEEING THE SKY? BREATHING FRESH AIR? FEELING FIRE? SLEEPING?? WASN'T THE WHOLE THING THAT THEY COULDN'T FALL ASLEEP???? i guess my impression of how the chip works is that the technology doesn't know how to handle when they enter a subconscious/asleeep state, so the innie and outie memories begin to bleed together, hence why dozing would be a bad thing on the job. but again, they clearly had this idea of how they wanted irving to reveal that it's helena in the waterfall, and yes, i did enjoy the spectacle of the episode, but its another example of how they'll build these moments and only focus on what they want to see. like there's so much interesting stuff that they could explore and just choose not to, because (usually) it doesn't involve mark, or mark and helly.

also, i'm just gonna say it, i feel like the writing for the women this season all was kinda bad! it's, again, a byproduct of the world revolving around mark now. reghabi is brought into the story when mark needs her, and cast aside when he doesn't want her anymore. devon has been completely reduced to mark's lackey, like i guess ricken and the baby are fucking fine or whatever??? because she only exists when mark is around, and her only job is caring about mark (which obviously yes, they're siblings, of course they care—but s1 devon had a life outside of mark as well). cobel is only brought back into the story to explain to mark how cold harbor works. i said this before but honestly i like the concept of her little solo episode, though the execution wasn't great, because at least she was doing something on her own (except for when she needs that guy to help her. heaven forbid a woman does something of her own accord without a man to help). and again, helly is completely flanderized to be mark's love interest. i think there's a way to have mark and helly be together and them be their own people, but for the length of the season they did not have the proper time to unpack all the shit from the ORTBO episode so everyone just…conveniently gets over it very quickly, like in the span of a day. like i do think it's a jump to go from "i don't trust you, are you even you?" to missionary under plastic tarps that quickly, i'm sorry. and i think even gemma suffers from this fate as well. i think with hers it makes more sense, like she fucking loves her husband, but i wish she was given opportunities to like…want things for herself, too. like she hasn't been outside in two years! i bet she misses her job, her students, her family, devon, ricken, like anyone outside of mark? but she has to be the tragic love interest that can't be with mark but can't run away from mark, either. she's reduced to set dressing for mark and helly by the end.

they constructed this season i think, with the hopes and knowledge that they'll likely get a season 3. which yes, we know now that it's been confirmed and approved or whatever, but they didn't know that when making season 2, and it feels like no one got a full character arc. it's all start and no follow through. we've had the same "mr. milchick experiences racism in the workplace" moment like what, five, six times, and yet we haven't even started to see him DO something about it yet? like sure he told mr. drummond to eat shit, but then to play along with the minstrel show cold harbor shit, they just didn't care about giving that plot line any action so it'll just get brushed along to season 3. (and while there's intentional commentary about race in the show, it also feels like there's unintentional consequences to their writing choices that upholds the whiteness. like, natalie is just forgotten about, reghabi is dropped as soon as mark doesn't want to play with her anymore, ms. huang barely gets to do anything before being written off and sent away, and yes, i do think having gemma suffer as mark and helly skip away is part of it. it leaves a bad taste in my mouth, sorry!). i think dylan is maybe the closest we get to an interesting arc, and i enjoy the inclusion of his wife, but even he's reduced to JUST this story, only getting to talk to mark or helly when the writers need him to, i guess. and the stuff with burt and fields is so nothing, like it feels like it should be going somewhere but they're just leaving it open for season 3 (i guess??? even though it seems like irving isn't going to be in it at all, so why would we be following burt and fields??? and also don't even get me started on how the outie irving stuff is just NOT EXPLORED AT ALL. like whatever sure who the hell cares, sorry for wanting to see that go somewhere or whatever).

it's too early for full reintegration to happen so, we'll just finish that in season 3. (then why introduce it so early in season 2? ohhh right, we need cliffhangers to end every episode on). it almost feels like they don't have faith that people will keep watching without introducing these dramatic moments, but it's all just gasps of breath, there's no actual momentum. like, i've already watched the first season, you don't need to bait me with the prospect of seeing meaningful progression and then take it away from me when the next episode starts. the structure of how episodes speak to each other is that they…don't? like obviously i don't need every episode to pick up on the exact moment the last left off, but the timeline of this season is just soooo strange. the first two episodes are in the same span of time, and then there's gemma and cobel's episodes back to back…it genuinely just feels like they didn't consider the season as a whole which, considering how much money and time it took to make it happen, makes no sense.

and to continue on the timeline aspect, it feels so confusing as to how much time has really passed. it feels like the wanted the structure of the first season, but the pacing mechanic of the first season (working up to the end of the quarter to get to the waffle party) makes the pacing of the second feel even worse. like a.) mark's completed like 3 files a quarter (if we assume he's worked there for 8 quarters, i.e. two years), so making THIS file the super special final one truncates the possible time by at least a third.but then also, b.) he's been at like 95% complete since like, episode 5..? again, i just think it should've been considered more during the planning stages. and it kind of boggles my mind that the creative team views the marching band in this finale to be analogous to the waffle party in s1 when, it's way closer to the music dance experience? (they said this in the like behind the scenes for the finale ep). and in that regard, it really does kind of feel like a retread that doesn't work as well because, again, it's all about mark! especially after the shit with the kier statue, why would mr. milchick play along with the song and dance, like it just feels like they wanted to use tramell tillman's dance experience again, and they wanted to use the colored lights again. he could've just stood by the door to make sure mark and helly stayed there, which was obviously the goal of having all those people there. and yeah, i get the work is mysterious and important or whatever, but the implication that they have ALL OF THESE PEOPLE whos sole job is to be a marching band makes no fucking sense, i'm sorry. i find it hard to play along with the worldbuilding, again it makes lumon seem like its run by like dr. doofenshmirtz or something, it's so cartoony. like are they a global and successful company, or are they incompetent and leave gaping holes for their employees to undo everything? this is THE MOST IMPORTANT DAY IN LUMON HISTORY and they couldn't…shut the door to MDR like they had before? the goat sacrifice room is directly outside the exports hall door? the music dance experience works so well as a catharsis moment because everyone has their own shit going on, and we get to see the guy who hasn't really disobeyed yet (dylan) finally snap, and we see the others come and support him as a TEAM. it's just spectacle for us, the viewer. and especially the thing where they make the panels with mark's face on it—HE CAN'T SEE IT???? i don't need fan service winking moments like that, i dunno, that just annoyed me lol.

anyway, i feel like i have more to say probably but i gotta go do things so, i'm gonna leave it here. in conclusion, i'm missing my friends from s1 MDR sooo so bad, i feel like i haven't seen them this season at all. i did like parts of this season, but overall it was not what i was hoping it would be. (i don't even really KNOW what i wanted it to be, and of course it doesn't matter what i "want," but i feel like what i "want" lined up with what they wanted to do explore with season 1 so…maybe that's where the dissonance is coming from). and whereas at the end of s1, where i left it being like "where are they going to go from here?? (as in, theres so many possibilities", this season finale has left me asking "…where are we gonna go from here?" because i'm left like, inherently incurious about the people we have left and the choices they've made. and, i feel like THEY (as in the executive team making it) must feel this way too, because apparently they've completely scrapped the writers room from this season and added on two new showrunners. good luck to whoever that executive story editor is LOL

[jromanoff]

Study Break II R. George

Pairing: student!Regina George (2024) x law student!Reader

Warning(s): Reader not eating enough

Authors note: I’m in the middle of uni exams this week so I wrote a little something to indulge myself :)

Summary: College!AU - Regina is worried about your study habits and decides to intervene.

Word count: 1.6k

Regina leaned against the door frame, watching you hunched over your textbooks, completely engrossed in your studies. The thick civil code books were laying open on the side, several coloured tabs sticking out to keep track of the laws you needed to use for your upcoming exams. Regina thought it almost looked like a rainbow at this point. That was the only pretty thing about the stuff on your desk though, it looked like a bomb exploded with the mess you’ve made.

"Babe, can you take a break? I miss spending time with you," Regina pouted, hoping to draw your attention away from the books in front of you. Her pout usually did the trick. She wanted to have some quality time with you since you haven’t been spending time with her these past few days, too engrossed with your studies. You even stopped having dinner with her.

You glanced up briefly, your brow furrowed in concentration. "Sorry Gina, I really need to focus. These exams are important."

Regina sighed dramatically, crossing her arms as she walked closer to you. Did you just really resist her pout? "You've been studying nonstop for days. Don't you think you're overdoing it a bit?"

You paused, looking at Regina with concern. "I know, but I need to do well in this. It's important for my future. I don’t want to be a failure."

Regina softened, her concern for you overriding her desire for attention. Regina almost laughed at this realisation, her High School-self could never. "I understand, but I'm worried about you. You need to take care of yourself too."

You reached out to take Regina's hand, caressing it. "I appreciate your concern, babe. But I really need to study now, I’m fine.” you said with a reassuring smile, concentrating back on your books.

Regina frowned and decided she needed to change her approach, this was clearly not working. So instead of complaining or outing her concerns, Regina tried to engage in a conversation with you.

“What are you studying, anyways?” Regina curiously inquired as she saw her girlfriend so intensely focused.

She never asked you about the content of your studies before, because she probably wouldn’t understand it. She, on the other hand, always excitedly rambled to you about whatever she learned that day. From fashion designers to fashion history, Regina shared it all. You didn’t mind it, though. Seeing your girlfriend so excited about her studies made you happy too and extra knowledge never hurt anyone. It was a nice contrast to your law studies.

“Legal philosophy” you replied curtly.

“Sounds boring” Regina remarked. Her efforts were met with a dismissive attitude from you, causing Regina to frown in disappointment. But Regina wouldn’t let this deter her from trying again.

“What are you reading about now, then?” Regina asked once again, looking over your shoulder at the book you were currently reading.

“The Case of the Speluncean Explorers” you responded, perplexed by Regina’s sudden interest in your ‘boring’ law studies. Especially after she just complained about not getting any attention from you.

“The what explorers?”

“The Speluncean Explorers,” you explained, slightly exasperated. “It’s a fictional judgement where five judges with different opinions shed their light on a fictional case. Five explorers got stuck in a cave and eventually ran out of food so… they agreed to eat one person so the other four could survive. They decided who it should be by throwing a dice and when the remaining four explorers were rescued they got a murder charge. I really need to study now if you don’t mind.” You hoped this elaborate answer would satisfy Regina’s curiosity so you could refocus on your studies.

When Regina kept silent after your explanation you thought you managed to fend off your girlfriend for the time being. Wrong.

Regina felt increasingly ignored by your continued focus on studying and your dismissive attitude towards her. So she decided to retort to an old tactic – a kiss to divert your attention. Despite being in college now and attempting to leave her manipulative ways behind, Regina deemed this situation an emergency. You would definitely cave in after a kiss.

Regina put her fingers under your chin, turning your face towards her. Then, she leaned in and pressed her lips softly to yours.

That sudden display of affection caught you off guard, but as Regina deepened the kiss your resistance immediately faded away. The tension in your shoulders eased as you gave into your girlfriend. Regina gently took the book you were holding from you.

“Regina, no. I need to study” you pulled away and protested, but Regina just kissed you again.

“What was that for, anyway?” you questioned her as you finally broke apart.

“So you’d be focused on something else than your studies. I deserve some attention too, you know? Not only your stupid books” Regina smirked.

You narrowed your eyes at her “I know what you’re trying to do” you told her and turned back to your desk. As you attempted to pick up your books once more, Regina shot you an ice cold glare. "If you don't put that book down right now... I swear to god you'll regret it," she warned, her tone leaving no room for argument. Regina rarely used that glare on you, but when she did? She was serious about it. Her glare and tone of voice caused you to immediately put your book back down, holding your hands up in surrender.

"That's what I thought," Regina asserted, a smirk playing on her lips. "Now, you’re cleaning up this mess of books and notebooks on this desk first," she declared, taking charge of the situation and asserting her authority over the chaotic study environment you created over the last week. How you could even study in this mess was a mystery to Regina.

Reluctantly, you set aside your textbooks and notes as Regina took charge of making dinner in the meantime, bustling about the kitchen.

The aroma of home-cooked food soon filled the air, causing a low rumble to come from your stomach. You quickly finished cleaning up your stuff and walked to the kitchen where Regina stood behind the stove.

“That smells delicious” you told your girlfriend as you embraced her from behind, resting your chin on her shoulder.

“It does, huh? Can you set the table for me, please?” Regina requested.

“Of course” you replied, giving Regina a kiss on the cheek before removing yourself from her. You set the table for dinner and sat down, waiting for Regina and the food.

As Regina set the steaming hot plates of food on the table, you immediately started eating before Regina herself had even the chance to get seated.

Regina observed you quickly shoving down the food she made with concern. It's a confirmation of her suspicions – you hadn’t been eating well all week, too consumed by your studies to the point you forgot to eat. With a pointed look, Regina breaks the silence. “I'm definitely keeping a closer eye on you when the next exam period comes up. You're not taking care of yourself properly. You’re never skipping dinner with me again in an exam period," Regina said, her gaze unwavering.

You frowned at her and attempted to deflect her concern. “You really don't need to, that's asking too much of you." you insisted

But Regina's resolve remains unyielding. "I don't care what you think. I'm keeping an eye on you. And that's final," she declares, her words leaving no room for argument. With a sigh you accept defeat, knowing that Regina can’t be swayed once she has her mind set on something.

That’s one thing that hasn’t changed since high school: Regina always gets what she wants.

After dinner, you cleared the table and did the dishes together. Then, Regina insisted on cuddling with you.

Entering your room, you see Regina is already situated on the bed. She already removed her makeup and changed into something more comfortable.

"Come here, you," Regina said, opening her arms wide with a playful smile. "I need some cuddles."

You hesitated for a moment before relenting, changing into comfier clothes and joining your girlfriend in bed. As your head hit the silk pillow (that Regina bought for you, because according to her it’s better for your hair) you sighed in content. "I guess I could use some cuddles too," you admitted softly, smiling back at your girlfriend.

Regina pulled you close, wrapping you in a warm embrace. “Now, I know you’re tired so I’ll let you go to sleep in a bit, but you do need to promise me to give me attention tomorrow.” she said, softly stroking your hair.

“I promise, my love” you murmur, pressing a gentle kiss to Regina’s forehead.

Eventually exhaustion takes hold of you both, and you drift off to sleep, wrapped in each other's embrace.

The next day you would spend no time on your studies, but only on Regina. You were determined to make it up to her. You even took her out on a spontaneous date to one of the high end restaurants she loved to make up for the lack of attention you gave her the past week. Afterwards the two of you went shopping and then cuddled for the remainder of the evening.

And your exams? Passed with flying colours.

[sims3fiend]

Some dumb sims 3 updates/stuf

Or, how to develop severe brain damage in 10 easy steps.

Sooo… This is going to be more of a blog post than anything of any real substance, more of a whinge with maybe a few teasers for some stuff I may or may not release (probably not). Feel free to skip if you're after hot tips or coherent writing.

Stutter "fixer"

Sooooo…. The sims 3 has some stutter issueeesss… Incredible discovery, I know! I started looking at remedying them with settings, found some hidden settings that help reduce some of the issues but that can only do so much when the game was made in 2009 for 2009 computers.

So I had a looky at some things I thought could be causing it, mainly WinAPI functions because that's the easier route (h-haha…), and started to try to "optimize" some of the more common ones:

ReadFile: Was the first, and looking at the sheer volume of like 12783972198 calls a milisecond every time you move the camera, I thought surely I can speed it up a little r-right. Not really. I tried all sorts of… interesting things, file caching in memory, implementing the overlapped flag (took ages), etc. Oh and the performance increase? Literally nothing. It's called weirdly from wherever it's called and so we must suffer.

Threads: So, I had a look at other areas that were potential targets for speedup, ran an actual profile and it showed a problem areas namely threads and some other stuff I don't remember. ZwWaitForMultipleObjects and WaitForSingleObject take up a lot of time, so I very poorly attempted to optimize them, adding some timeout optimizations (and a bunch of other failed attempts). Despite being the most insane, this actually worked, and I got like a 40% speed increase in a very very niche metric that did not noticeably effect the game one single bit. I plan to combine all my failures into a single script eventually, maybe once combined they'll do something…

Actual insanity - Memory IPC: Then I had an idea, everyone hates e12, why don't we shove the games memory into another process and that'll fix it. No brain moment. No clue what past me was thinking, for some reason I thought you could like, access another processes memory if it was spawned from it, but uhh.. no, that's not how things work… I tried a few other things in a similar vein but it just crashed and crashed, so for now I'm just gunna work on:

Alloc/free mee - Current insanity: Currently, I'm still working on VirtualAlloc and VirtualFree (which is what I was redirecting to another process), but more from an optimizing memory usage standpoint than a… whatever the IPC thing was. There's a lot of things to try, and I've had some luck in some areas and some abysmal failures in others. There's a few promising functions calling VirtualAlloc/Free that seem to be potentially pointing towards memory leaks (004e54d0), but I'm too dumb to investigate that. At the moment, I'm going mostly just gathering more logs which takes forever and hurts my brain real bad.. On testing there's like 180 allocs that we could probably yeet no problem, which is like 750mb saved… Maybe idk.

I have plenty of ideas for deduplication, memory pool implementations to reduce churn/fragmentation, shoving things aggressively into pagefiles if they're not being used, etc. etc. Basically, there's a lot of avenues to explore, and I feel like there's potential… though I've definitely said that before and been dead wrong so…

Anyway, rambling over. I plan to release a dumb little renderer settings mod maybe-soon-ish that'll let you do dumb stuff that might be useful for reshade like turn shadows/drop shadows off and post processing off and on. I guess I could add max lots and other settings eventually too since they're static values.... Might also do a mythbusting post for some performance "tweak" stuff I see thrown around that isn't super accurate but I also don't want people to be angry at me so maybe not.

Sorry to whoever read all this, but also thanks :)

[hidden-ember]

simon says

🗯 pairing: captain john price x fem!reader | simon ghost riley x fem!reader

🗯 tags: nsfw - mdni, cucking, oral sex, fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected pinv, established relationship, praise, ooc as fuck i'm sure

a/n: this one was incredibly self indulgent, so i got a little carried away with it. i fully intend to do a pt. 2 if you all want that!

You couldn’t believe the situation you found yourself in: your husband of several years just confessed to you he had always had a fantasy of watching you with another man. You expressed that you weren’t opposed to the idea; as long as it was something he truly wanted then you’d do your best to please him. 

When he threw out some names of people you may be interested in he never expected to see a spark of desire in your eyes as he mentioned his former boss.

“Oh really?” Ghost asked with a raise of his eyebrow, his tone laced with amusement. 

“Y-yeah,” you said shyly, not wanting to go into detail about how attractive you found Captain Price. 

The older man led Simon in a specialized task force for a few years, both having since moved on to different military ventures and then retirement. 

Price had always caught your eye at any get-together he and the rest of Ghost’s former team would attend, and you had never imagined revealing this attraction to your husband. Until now. 

Any time he would tower over you while making small talk, cerulean eyes subtly trailing down to your lips and chest before meeting your gaze you had to fight to keep your face from flushing. 

Your dreams the nights after these gatherings would be filled with visions of the Captain buried between your legs, his facial hair prickling your skin as he worked you with his mouth until your legs were trembling. 

Ghost cleared his throat, sensing you were deep in thought. “I’ll text him now?”

Once you gave him the go ahead he reached for his phone. His fingers trembled slightly as he tapped out a message, inviting Price over Friday evening for some ‘fun’. 

He tossed his phone down and leaned in close, his warm breath tickling your ear as he whispered, “I’m going to enjoy watching you with him.” 

“I hope so, Simon, because I wouldn’t be doing this otherwise,” you responded, pulling back to look at him. You wanted him to know even though you were indulging him in this fantasy, you would never imagine being unfaithful to him without his knowledge and without him being involved.

Ghost met your gaze, his eyes filled with appreciation and desire for you. “I know, love.” 

You left it at that, both carrying on with the rest of your week without mentioning it again until shortly before Price’s arrival.

“You’re still okay with this, yeah?” Ghost wrapped his arms around you from behind as you did your makeup in the mirror. 

“More than okay,” you reassured him as he tugged at your earlobe with his teeth. 

“Easy now,” he chuckled, a hint of warning in his tone. 

That was the best thing about this arrangement. You had always been attracted to Price and were eager to explore that, but you were most looking forward to what came after.

You knew that once he watched Price fuck you, Ghost would be ravenous. You had a long night ahead of him proving to you that while he may allow another man to touch you, they’d never be able to touch you better than he could. 

“I don’t know what to wear.” Your face grew hot as you began wondering what Price would think when he saw you again. 

“Anything,” Ghost replied firmly. “You look great in anything.”

“Well I have that dress from-,” you paused when he began shaking his head. 

“That won’t be necessary,” he murmured against your neck, trailing soft kisses down it as his hands settled on your stomach. “You’ll be waiting for us in the bedroom, sweetheart.”

“Oh,” you whispered, realization dawning on you that he was suggesting you wear lingerie. 

"Hmmm. Price seems like the type to enjoy white." You thought out loud, a lace baby doll you had in your dresser coming to mind. "Something about corrupting a good girl."

“S’that what you are?” Ghost smirked while making eye contact with you in the mirror. 

You laughed away his teasing, knowing he was only attempting to get you riled up. “Oh, please. If anyone’s corrupted me it’s you, but let me have my fun.”

"That's perfect," he agreed, his eyes roaming over the reflection of your body, envisioning the delicate white lace. "He's going to love seeing you like that." He leaned in close and whispered into your ear, his voice low and husky, “And so will I.”

His stiffening cock was now pressing firmly into the small of your back and you grinned at him in the mirror. “I can see you’re very excited about this.”

Ghost's eyes darted downward before meeting yours again, a mix of embarrassment and desire flushing his cheeks. "Not every day my wife offers up herself and her body for another man," he confessed with a shrug that did little to hide his arousal.

“Don’t be embarrassed, love.” You squeezed his hands reassuringly. “It’s hot you’re so into this.”

"Thank you," Ghost whispered as he wrapped his arms around you tighter. "I just want to make sure everything is perfect for Price tonight. He deserves it."

“Yeah? Deserves to fuck your wife?” You teased, knowing it would only make the hardness poking into your back ache even more. 

Ghost chuckled darkly at your words. "Yeah, he does," he growled while pressing his hips forward slightly into you with a noticeable amount of possession in his movement. "And I plan to enjoy every filthy second of it."

You spun around to face him, and he immediately stepped forward, pushing you into the edge of the vanity. Ghost groaned as he felt your hands slip beneath his shirt to stroke his stomach, a thick layer of fat having formed over his abs since retirement that drove you crazy in all the right ways. 

"Don't tease me like that," he warned when your fingers moved higher up his chest.

"Fine,” you conceded with a soft sigh, sliding out from under his shirt. “I’ll keep my hands to myself until he arrives.”

"That’s a good girl," he praised, loving how aroused you were getting. He pulled back slightly but kept his hands on your waist. "Now, why don't you get dressed and wait for us on the bed, hmm?”

As you moved to put on the white lace number and matching silk thong you knew both men would adore you in, Ghost left for the living room, leaving your bedroom door slightly ajar. You bit down on your lip nervously when you heard the doorbell buzz not even a few minutes later. 

Ghost’s heart raced with anticipation as he approached the front door and saw Price’s silhouette against the dim street light shining through the glass. He knew you were waiting for them in the bedroom, dressed in the lingerie that he had helped pick out and he had to make an effort to appear nonchalant as he opened the door for Price.

You sat on the edge of the bed, your heart rate quickening as you heard the Captain’s commanding voice fill your home. Their conversation was muffled, but the distinct sound of ice and alcohol being poured made you smirk to yourself.

The pair catching up over a drink like former colleagues while you were waiting in the bedroom like a piece of meat to be devoured only added to your arousal, the wetness gathering between your legs becoming more prominent the longer they left you alone. Ghost seemed to be carrying most of the conversation for once, probably out of sheer excitement.  

Price appeared to be enjoying himself as well, laughing at something Ghost said before they made their way to the bedroom together.

As they entered the room your eyes darted between your husband and his friend, unsure who to look at. The click of the door closing echoed through your mind as you pictured what was about to happen. 

Ghost took a step towards you, his eyes fixed on your body as he admired the sexy lingerie that clung to your curves. He couldn't help but feel a surge of possessiveness as he turned to look at Price, who was now standing close behind him.

He swallowed hard, the bob of his Adam's apple betraying his nervousness, before stepping to the side and sitting in the armchair at the corner of your room.

Price looked you up and down slowly, taking in every inch of your exposed body. His eyes lingered on your full breasts before traveling back up to meet yours. 

"You look bloody incredible, Mrs. Riley," he smirked, knowing it would drive Ghost mad to hear you being referred to with his last name. You were his after all and Price would do well to remember that. You glanced at Simon briefly, surprised to see his face beaming with pride rather than annoyance as he watched Price approach you. 

“Thank you, John,” you blushed, having to crane your neck to look at him the closer he got to the bed. The lamp in the corner illuminated his face as he stood before you and you noticed even more gray hair dusting his temples and beard than the last time you saw him. 

He wasted no time before kneeling down, his calloused hands running up and down your thighs lightly before stopping at your knees. You were sure your face was completely bright red now, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. 

“Oh, sweet thing,” Price let out a breath as he spread your legs. “You’re soaked already.”

He placed a kiss to your core through your panties, holding eye contact with an intensity that sent shivers down your spine. Ghost sat up a little straighter in his seat at the sight.

The silk fabric clung to your folds now, saturated with your arousal. You felt yourself throbbing now, cunt desperate for attention. Many nights you had dreamed of being in this exact position, his handsome face staring up at you from between your legs.

Disappointment must have been evident on your face as Price pulled back and shifted on his feet, moving to lean over you. Your pouting drew a raspy chuckle out of your husband.

“Needy girl you have, Simon,” Price observed with a small smile, turning to look at him. He gave a single nod in response, eager for Price to continue.

With gentle hands he brushed your hair behind your shoulders as his gaze roamed your chest, his hum of satisfaction reverberating through the room. He unfastened the clasp on the front of the baby doll, letting it fall off of you and onto the bed. 

Your nipples hardened as the cool air hit your skin. Price’s hands found their way to your breasts immediately, beginning to roll his thumbs over your nipples in tight circles. He studied your face closely as it contorted in pleasure, admired the way your breath caught in your throat audibly at the sensation. 

“You know, I’ve always wondered what it would be like to fuck you,” Price whispered into your ear, his hot breath causing goosebumps on your skin. His lips brushed against your earlobe and your eyes widened, finding Ghost’s. He watched you with a hunger and possessiveness you had never seen from him before, clearly having heard what the other man said to you. 

You gasped in surprise when Price’s lips latched onto your nipple, too distracted by Simon to realize he had wandered lower once more. You moaned softly as his tongue circled the hardened bud, back arching as he squeezed your other breast roughly. 

Ghost watched attentively from his corner seat, a mix of arousal and pride coursing through him. He could tell by the way that you were responding that Price was taking good care of you, making sure you were enjoying every moment. 

Price’s mouth left your tit and he captured your lips in a kiss. It felt strange at first but you softened, losing yourself to the feeling of him. The kiss deepend as Price’s tongue slid past your lips, tasting you for the first time. His hands wandered down your body, teasingly grazing the hem of your panties before finally slipping beneath to run along your slick folds.

“All this for me, hm?” Price murmured against your lips.

“Y-yes,” you stuttered. A half truth. It was for him, yes. But it was just as much for Simon, who was now palming himself through his jeans.

Seeing how excited you were already, he didn’t hesitate to part your folds, circling your entrance once before pumping two fingers inside of you. You let out an exasperated gasp and squirmed as he did.

“Oh, c’mon, angel. I know you can take it.” He winked at you before continuing. “This is nothing compared to your husband’s cock,” he said playfully before curling his fingers inside of you, thrusting faster now.

"That's a good girl," he praised you as he felt your relax around his fingers, rewarding you by pressing circles into your swollen clit in a steady rhythm with his thumb.   

Ghost could tell by the sounds you were making that you were getting close already, the thought only serving to fuel his arousal. His chest tightened as he watched Price work you open. You faintly made out the sound of a zipper as your senses started to be overloaded, vision blurry and ears ringing.

“Fuck, John. I’m close,” you moaned, wrapping your arms around his free one to steady yourself as your climax rapidly approached. His muscles tensed under your grip; he was every bit as strong as you had imagined. 

Price tutted at you, shaking his head. “Ask your husband for permission, dear.”

“Simon,” you pleaded. “Simon, please, I-” your breath was coming in ragged gasps, leaving you incapable of forming a full sentence.

“Let go, love,” you heard him from the corner of the room. The way his voice strained told you that he was stroking his cock as he listened to you begging for release. Begging him despite another man being the one to drive you to orgasm.

Price grabbed you by the chin, angling it upwards and pressing his lips to yours, stifling your cries of pleasure as you came undone. As if he could keep your release all to himself like this, swallowing it down so Ghost couldn’t have it.

Ghost watched intently as Price took control of the situation, his body tense with anticipation for what was about to happen. He could feel his own climax building inside him, mirroring your pleasure as he listened to your cries of ecstasy being muffled by the other man’s kiss.

As Price continued to milk your orgasm, he leaned down and whispered into your ear, this time low enough that Ghost couldn’t hear, “You were never quite this pretty all the times I’ve imagined you coming.” 

He pulled away slowly, leaving you panting and covered in sweat. His eyes met Ghost’s once more before he finally released you from his grasp. You sat at the edge of the bed, legs trembling as you tried to catch your breath. He pulled your panties off, eyes glued to your glistening cunt.

“Lie back for me, sweetheart,” John ordered as he moved for his zipper, desperate to free his throbbing cock. You did as he said, gaze locked on his crotch as he tugged down his pants and boxers. 

As his cock sprang free, you hated the way you instantly noticed it wasn’t as big as Ghost’s. It wasn’t small by any means, maybe even a bit longer, but not as thick. You had gotten so used to feeling stuffed full by Ghost that now a part of you was anxious to have another man for the first time in years. What if you were spoiled? What if your husband had ruined you for all other cocks?

You glanced in his direction, noting the small smirk tugging at his lips and you knew he was aware of exactly what was on your mind. Smug bastard, you thought to yourself before returning your attention to Price, opening your legs wider for him.

Ghost’s expression remained impassive as he watched Price line himself up and penetrate you. His hand twitched unconsciously, the urge to reach out and claim what was rightfully his burning within him. But he held back, remaining silent and still, his hand freezing on his cock.

You moaned as Price buried himself to the hilt, having quickly forgotten any anxiety you were feeling a moment before. He let you adjust to his length before pulling out completely and slamming his hips forward, causing you to yelp. Ghost began pumping himself again as he saw how rough his friend was with you, how well you were taking him. 

“Fuck,” he hissed as he pounded into you. “Good fuckin’ girl.” 

His arms fell to either side of your head as he leaned in to nibble at your neck. From this angle his gut pushed into your stomach - the only distinction between the sensation of his and your husband’s was John’s more pronounced happy trail. 

He reached down between the two of you and began roughly rubbing at your sensitive clit again. His tempo didn't falter and he was hitting your g-spot with each stroke, white-hot pleasure clouding your mind and turning you into a mumbling mess beneath him.

“Yeah? Like that?” Price cooed at you and your toes curled. He kept up his pace, relentlessly pummeling you.

“Yes. God, yes,” you whined. The sounds of skin on skin and moaning filled the room from all three of you now. 

Your walls contracted around Price and your back arched, pressing your bodies flush together as you surrendered yourself to him completely.

“Come for me,” he encouraged with a hint of ownership. Not of you, but of this orgasm. The last one may have been for Ghost, but this one would be for him. 

He thrust into you more deliberately now, bottoming out each time. You let out a strangled moan as you climaxed again. Ghost came with you, spurting into his hand as he squeezed his cock tightly, his own sounds of pleasure drowned out by yours.

You whimpered as John suddenly pulled out of you and moved to stand at the edge of the bed. “C’mere,” he croaked, quickly sitting you up and bringing your head down towards his cock.

“You didn’t think I’d let anyone else finish inside that pretty little pussy of yours, did you?” Ghost murmured from the corner, voice hoarse as he was spent from his own release.

You shifted your gaze to Simon before parting your lips for Price. “Mm, see how you taste on another man’s cock?” He taunted as you wrapped your mouth around the head.

Though your eyes stayed glued to Ghost’s, you attempted a nod in response. Tears pricked your eyes as you slowly took more of his shaft into your mouth. 

“Simon says you’re good with your mouth. I intend to take full advantage of that,” he said, grunting as he pushed himself deep into your throat, your eyes returning to him.

As you moaned around his cock he smirked down at you. "Oh, you like it rough, do you?" He quickly lost control, hips meeting your face as he thrust in rhythm with your mouth.

You had mixture of saliva and pre-cum running down your chin now, mascara staining your cheeks. Ghost had you in a similar state countless times before while fucking your face, but seeing you like this wrapped around someone else's cock was turning him on in an entirely new way.

In an attempt to prolong his release, Price tangled his fingers into your hair, holding you in place at the base of his cock. When you gagged he loosened his grip, allowing you to back off a bit before you started bobbing your head on his length again. "That feels incredible," he said, admiring the way you milked his cock.

His balls were already tight, and you pushed him over the edge once you began to caress them with feather-light touches. He threw his head back with a low groan, frame tensing as he shot thick ropes of cum down your throat. His hips jerked forward as you hollowed out your cheeks. You swallowed most of his spend and pulled off of his cock with a satisfied moan.

He brushed the hair away from your face, his chest heaving as he looked down at you. His thumb trailed over your bottom lip, collecting the bit of cum that had dribbled out. He held it there for you, waiting for you to clean it off. You took it into your mouth, taking your time cleaning him, savoring the taste as you swirling your tongue around his finger. He pulled it out with a loud pop once he caught his breath.

“Beautiful,” he whispered, referring to your performance just as much as your disheveled appearance.

“That she is,” Ghost said, rising from his seat, looking at you with a predatory gaze. He tucked his still semi-hard cock into his pants and your stomach tightened at the sight.

Price zipped himself up as well and turned to Ghost. You were surprised he wouldn’t be staying, but it was clear the two men had discussed all the details beforehand. 

“Oh sweetheart, I don’t want anyone here for the depraved things I’m gonna do to you,” Ghost threatened in a low tone that had you clenching around nothing. Price let out a hearty laugh before turning back to you.

“Thank you for being so good for me,” he murmured and cupped your face in his hands. When Ghost cleared his throat behind him, he corrected himself with a sheepish grin. “Good for us.”

He gave you a genuine smile and a soft kiss on the forehead before leaving for the front door with Ghost. They exchanged goodbyes and the last you heard from Price as you walked to the doorway was, “Don’t be a stranger now, Simon.”

Shortly after you heard the door swing shut your husband was on you. “Alright, back to bed with you,” Simon grinned, smacking your ass playfully. You giggled, walking backwards, eyes never leaving him as he stripped. 

“You’re mine,” he reminded you with a growl before his lips crashed into yours, the two of you falling onto the bed.

[thegoliathbeetle]

Hello hello! Do you have any Aaron fic recs? Or general recs? <3 TY! LOVE YOU! HOPE YOU HAVE AN AMAZING DAY!

DO I EVER

I feel Aaron fics are the only thing I read. Hold on lemme open my bookmarks...

Okay, I'll rec 5 in each category bc I literally have so many recs I wouldn't be able to fit it all in one post

KevAaron

I don't think things through (I never get time) by 11moons - KevAaron, wholesome twinyards, one long delicious oneshot. I think it's quite new, I found it last night and inhaled it in one sitting.

you're losing me. by Ateiluj - It's a relationship breakdown fic, very angsty BUT there's a happy ending for KevAaron, so no fear! I love everything about it: the characterisation is spot on, the pacing is amazing, the plot is gripping, I can't find a single fault. 75k+ or something, read it in one night.

crashing into you by ratbandaid - Just a classic KevAaron oneshot, very entertaining. Loved every minute.

whitewater by Anonymous - SEVERELY underrated, I can't believe how few comments this has. It's one of my favourite fics, although it is *EXTREMELY* angsty—don't ignore the tags because there are a lot of potential triggers. The KevAaron is very slight in this, because it's more an Aaron-centric oneshot of a self-destructive spiral that gets worse and worse and worse. Angst with a happy ending, though!

Shared Smoke on the Backyard Patio by 11moons - Another fantastic Aaron study with lots of Kevin <3 a fic I keep coming back to.

Twinyards

Quiet by SparklingDragonTears - I love those slice of life moments between the twins. This is one of them <3

talkin too much (or I don't say enough) by 11moons - this is the third fic of theirs in this list and that's because everything they write is solid gold. Another fantastic Aaron study with bonus Andrew.

one more or one less, nobody's worried by sistercacophony - My skincare routine? Why, it's Aaron angst with lots of Twinyard drama and wholesomeness. Another great fic about Aaron's trauma, though ofc, mind the tags.

a guard dog there just for her by milfairy - I love milfairy's whole Trans Aaron universe, but this one is definitely my favourite. It's also the first in the series I think?? It's fantastic, with lots of Twinyard angst and love.

Medical Misunderstanding by CamilleDuDemon - Another author I highly recommend for their amazing Twinyards fics. This one is about Aaron being a good brother to Andrew.

KateAaron

you're holy to me by melopeya - I love little insights into their relationship, and this is just such a beautiful hurt/comfort moment where Katelyn showers Aaron with love. Your honour I just ADORE them.

aaron's lament by nanatsuyu - A fluffy family fic with KateAaron cuteness.

this red is for you by Ominous - I recommend their entire fic universe tbh but this one is particularly dear to me!!! I adore it. Protective and badass Katelyn, we love to see it.

a girl so bright she'll blind you by badcats - Aaron and Katelyn falling in love!! <3

with my last breath by ace_andi - Aaron and Katelyn talk after Seth's death. BONUS because I love my girl Katelyn:

Like a Force to be Reckoned With by Mia_writes - tbh this is not an Aaron fic, but it's a Katelyn character study set during Aaron's trial.

Rarepairs: MattAaron and Aaron/Allison

You look beautiful, but you don't look fine by orphan_account - I love, love sickfics, but it's very rare to come across an expertly written one. This is probably one of the best sickfics I've read in the aftg fandom. It's definitely one of the best Aaron-centric sickfics out there.

The End of the World as We Know It (But Not Really) by kiraisstillhere - Unfortunately this is incomplete, but it's a really interesting fic that starts with Aaron relapsing and Matt finding him. I'm always down to read anything that explores their addictions.

friends of friends by likearecord - I didn't know I'd even need to read an Aaron/Allison fic, but omg this one convinced me. They'd work SO well if they could both stop being so pissy for five minutes. A very enjoyable read!!

...And I would be remiss to not mention my own Aaron-centric fics:

can you bring life to anything? - it's an Aaron character study (oneshot)

Dope Sick - a freeform multichapter fic exploring his addiction and relapse

There you go!! I have so many more fic recs, the list just keeps growing because I read a lot of fic xD (And actually, I read only Aaron fics these days)

Thanks so much for asking!! this was really fun :D

[djarinova]

"careful there, stranger" — rafayel x reader

˗ˏ✎ synopsis:- in which rafayel is stuck talking to some investors, leaving you to explore the exhibition on your own, much to the glee of the man trying to chat you up while you look at all the art your boyfriend created.

˗ˏcontent - reader gets hit on repeatedly, rafayel comes to the rescue, insecure rafayel, gn!reader - purple divider by @/saradika-graphics

˗ˏwc - 1371

my fishie<3: i can see u from here. looking sexy and staring at my art my fishie<3: u've seen it all before. why won't u come rescue meee instead :(((( me: baby stop looking at me and focus on your networking! im not going anywhere but those suits might if you dont pay them enough attention my fishie<3: >:( my fishie<3: ok smartie. dont forget about me during your exploration >:(

You roll at your eyes and drop your phone into your bag, a shiver flutters up your spine and you sneak at glance towards Rafayel. Your suspicions are proved to be correct, he's watching you, a pout on his face, as several men in suits attempt to flatter him into some partnership or sponsorship or something of that kind. Thomas stands by his side, enthusiastically waving his hands around and pointing towards the piece of art the group of them are currently standing next to. You giggle when you lock eyes with Rafayel and find him sticking his tongue out at you, and you watch as Thomas lands a discreet (but direct) hit on his foot in an effort to get the artist to concentrate.

You turn away from the scene—not wanting to be in trouble with thomas, and not wanting to make his job of marketing rafayel to those people any harder—fully expecting to be able to continue your wander around the exhibition, maybe have a couple friendly conversations with those few people you recognise, and definitely intending to snag a few bits from the table of snacks (rafayel would kill you if he wasn't able to try at least 7 of the different foods), but as you attempt to take a step forward you stumble clumsily into someone’s side. Although you're sure they weren't there a second ago.

"I'm so sorry!" You exclaim, "are you alright?"

The stranger ignores your worries, “you have such an infectious laugh.”

You smile, slightly awkwardly, but accept the compliment nonetheless. “Thank yo–”

“It makes me think about all the things I could do to make you laugh like that.” He chuckles, an attempt to lighten the mood, but he finds you almost completely unreceptive to his words.

So he tries again.

“Your smile is so stunning,” he takes a step towards you, forcing you to discreetly take one backwards to avoid standing chest to chest with him. “I've never seen you here before, you a fan of art?”

You press your lips together. He's never seen you here before? At an art gallery that you visit almost every week to look at your boyfriend's work? That's the best he could come up with… the thought almost makes you laugh. But when your gaze moves towards him he must take your eye contact as a positive sign because he takes another small step towards you and asks for your phone number.

“C'mon, you won't leave me hanging, surely?” He teases, but his smile doesn't quite reach his eyes. “A pretty thing like you, wandering around all alone, it ain't right. Let me show you some of my favourite pieces.”

“Oh! I'm not alone actually, my boyfr–”

“We should move out of this section though, I've never found Rafayel's art to be all that interesting. He is way overhyped, I mean… what is this even meant to be?” He gestures to the piece you're standing in front of.

Ignoring the man's words, you turn away from him and look at the art, hoping he'll finally take the hint and realise that you are not interested.

“I've always loved this one.” You whisper, more talking to yourself than anything else. You hear the man scoff next to you.

“Oh really? And how exactly have you always loved this one when it's a brand new piece for this installation?” He rolls his eyes at you, “clearly I overestimated your ability to distinguish between artwork.”

You raise your eyebrows, your jaw dropping ever so slightly when the man continues his ridiculous rant despite a single word not leaving your mouth.

“I mean, really, did you expect me to fall for this pretentious attitude you've got going on. Wandering around by yourself isn't exactly attractive, you know.”

You're the one hounding me and I'm the one with a pretentious attitude? This guy is ridiculous. You think to yourself.

“And then pretending to love a piece that has only been available for public viewing since about 3 hours ago? You really are trying too hard, next ti–”

“Careful there, stranger.” A familiar voice interrupts, “you wouldn't want to disturb your fellow fans of art by making a big scene, would you?”

You smile when you feel Rafayel's warmth against your back, the ring you got him sits comfortably, and familiarly, against your skin as he places his hand on your arm.

A scowl crosses the man's face. “Who do you think you are? You cocky little…”

It takes a few seconds for the stranger to realise why he knows the man who so casually rests his hand on you, but when it dawns on him and the recognition crosses his features it takes all your strength not to start grinning at his reaction. He stumbles backwards, bowing his head and muttering half hearted apologies, and you watch as he turns abruptly and practically runs out of the entryway.

Rafayel’s laughter fills your ears, his hands slide down to your waist and when he spins you towards him you can't help but follow his lead and let out a small laugh as well. The urge to pull him against you almost overwhelms you, his cheeks are slightly flushed and his lips look unbelievably soft in this light, but when you remember where you are—a work event, with plenty of important opportunities for Rafayel—you manage to refrain.

“Wait!” You whip your head around, “shouldn't you be with Thomas still? Please tell me you didn't blow off those possible investors…”

Rafayel's cheeks redden ever so slightly, the light dusting making him even more irresistible.

“What did you expect me to do, angel? Leave you to the wolves?” His fingers twiddle with the cardigan in your hands, “besides, Thomas can do perfectly well without me.”

The two of you turn your heads towards Thomas. The men are all heavily engaged in conversation, although now they are closer to the painting on the right and seem to be discussing it in intense detail.

“So… tell me more about how you've always loved this one, I'm dying to hear about it.”

A flush creeps onto your cheeks and you smack Rafayel's arm lightly, “I can't believe you were listening to that. I'm never coming with you to an opening ever again.”

Your threat is empty, Rafayel knows this. So when you attempt to escape from his grasp he's quick to chase after you and pull you tightly against his chest.

“You would never be so mean.” He whispers, his breath tickles your neck and you feel a shiver sweep over your body.

You feel people's eyes on you but you try to pay it no mind, it is Rafayel's exhibition after all.

“You're ridiculous,” you tease.

His arms squeeze you once more before loosening ever so slightly, just loose enough for you to turn around in his grip. His eyes are waiting for you, warm and soft and familiar, and when you slide your arms around his waist—he is somehow now the one holding onto your cardigan—he smiles a knowing smile and you feel your cheeks warm again.

“Maybe… but you love me anyway.” His words are light, but you recognise that uncertainty in his voice.

“Yes, I do. I love you very much, Rafayel.”

He smiles, a wide, vulnerable type of smile and as you press a light kiss to his cheek you hear the unmistakable voice of Thomas getting closer and closer. Rafayel's smiles turns into a frown rather suddenly and when he links his hand in yours you look over at him with a questioning gaze.

“You're coming with me this time, cutie.”

And so you let him lead you towards Thomas and his potential investors, happy to be thrown into the deep end, as long as you're by his side.

[oathkeeper-of-tarth]

Time for a long Aylin ramble, because I haven't indulged in a while.

I'm actually really invested in Aylin being an aasimar! I do not think it is a misnomer or mistake, as I've seen people suggest. She was referred to as a celestial explicitly in some older builds of the game, but this was changed at some point during development. And I noted aasimar enjoyer Oath, quelle surprise prefer it this way for a variety of reasons. Primarily, I think, because it lets her be larger than life, have a touch of that other-worldliness and otherness, while keeping her very much "of this world" still, very (physically and otherwise) present and part of the prime material plane, and ultimately far more human than I believe even she herself would sometimes like to be.

To bring up the most basic and rules/mechanics-bound "creature type" level of categorisation, as an aasimar she is a humanoid, and not a celestial - outsider. Her outsider status is absolutely there and a goldmine of things to explore, but that's a different post sitting in my drafts for far too long that I'll get around to one of these days (but for now you should read this post that I love). Yes, she is in a very real sense above it all, she will outlast everyone around her and whatever she gets involved with. We also get to see her dramatic poetic archaic speech idiosyncrasies (Ho!), her odd sense of the passage of time, and, of course, her oft-discussed and joked about apparent lack of filter or regard for current social graces.

(Endlessly amused at her just going: I'll do it when my mum tells me to.)

All things combined, Aylin feels more like a being of two worlds to me than a guest visiting this one, even as she is called the emissary of a goddess. She embodies a blending and an odd balancing act between the lofty divine and the mundane, duty and preordained purpose and personhood, and touches on the many ways this balance can be tipped. A classic D&D aasimar struggle, really, and a well I am happy to keep returning to.

Balthazar: She was a unique specimen even before I began my work. Aasimar. A god's blood united with mortal flesh.

She honestly isn't even that far from a regular aasimar stat- and ability-wise - Aylin does have several special abilities, but these are flavoured as blessings from her divine mother instead of an inherent property of her as a creature - though, notably, Aylin herself at one point claims she is always reborn because "it is [her] nature".

“Blessed with the favour of a goddess, Nightsong cannot be permanently killed. When unconscious, at the start of her turn she recovers 1 hit point.” “Nightsong will be resurrected by the powers of Selûne whenever she dies.”

Importantly, she does not get to reincarnate, or get a new body, or flit away to her "home plane" or anything like what celestials get to do. She is anchored to this one physical existence (again, very human of her), tied and limited to this one body as it painstakingly repairs itself over and over and over (to a sometimes extreme extent, e.g. the all but outright stated regrowing of amputated body parts in a frankly horrifying context), insistently and indomitably but ultimately imperfectly. And I think that's part of why the kintsugi design drives me utterly wild, why her immortality setup is more interesting to me than, say, a mutant healing factor, or something like the characters in The Old Guard. Her history is pretty literally engraved on her skin, and when she, in the role of a power-granting artefact and the object of a ritual sacrifice, tells you she will feel every wound you inflict upon her, it is so easy to believe her. And I'm not even that invested in physical suffering, just that it means it's all still very palpably there, forever, and she doesn't get to magically restart with a clean slate in this sense, nor does she get to forget past lifetimes as some creatures like devas do. It's just a flavour of immortality I personally find far more engaging than most.

(I mean, yes, I am also a known hurt/comfort sucker and if you're going there in order to set up a scene where she's, I dunno, getting doted on by Isobel who's invented new scar tissue pain relief massage techniques, you know I'm going to be all over that.)

I'm also not sure I'd say she can just pop over to Argentil to hang out with her mum at will. I mean, planeshifting is not that hard to achieve, and also she can just… ask Selûne, ultimately, I guess. But I wouldn't say she has spent much time there, and I think she takes her role as Selûne's champion and representative in the Realms too seriously and too much to heart to be away from them for very long.

Which also calls to mind the issue of the obvious and "simple" answer to Isobel's eventual death - namely that with Isobel picked up as a petitioner soul they'll all just go live out the better part of an eternity in Selûne's realm. Probably in some form they will - it's never guaranteed, but this time, yeah, probably something like that will happen, and there will be, as Melodia says, no loss, only temporary separation. But I'm really not into just handwaving or stripping away most of the mortal/immortal pairing issues inherent in the relationship. If we're going for the "hang out in a different plane of existence forever" option, I think at one point Aylin would have to "complete" her duties and lay down her sword, in a way, and pick between Faerûn and the Gates of the Moon - meaning she herself is effectively moving on to a completely new phase of her existence as well.

And while Selûne carving a lovely marble statue and bringing it to life and similar takes are fun and beautiful and interesting, I'm very invested in an Aylin who was born, raised, and had to actually grow up and learn and be trained. I have a ton of headcanons of Aylin being a weird glowy baby at some point (with all the Disney's Hercules jokes I've seen folks make, of course), being entrusted to a series of Selûnite enclaves and temples and cloisters, hounded by Shar and her agents pretty much all her life.

(Neither here nor there, but Aylin also comes off as a fairly "young" immortal to me - note that I am basing this on absolutely nothing but a general impression and there's no actual hint anywhere about how old she really is. Just vibes.)

To finish up, I'd like to shout out Isobel, and the big humanising factor she is presented as. For instance, a very concrete bit of motivation for Aylin to eventually "humanise" her perception of time, if nothing else.

Aylin without Isobel is horribly depressing to me mostly because she seems to distance herself from her humanity and err on the side of holy duty (see: her epilogue letter, ouch). And Isobel is definitely the person who (invaluably, imo) explicitly and consistently insists on Aylin's humanity and personhood, who cares for her as a woman and not a divine weapon, who actually treats her well-being as a priority, and who understands her so very well and so deeply. Who does acknowledge the gloriously resplendent Dame Aylin, daughter of the Moonmaiden herself in all her awe-inspiring presence and occasionally amusing foibles, but who never fails to look past the titles and fronts even Aylin herself is so keen to put up, and focus on what lies behind it all.

A moment that sticks out to me in particular is her bemoaning Aylin's disregard for her own safety, then actually getting very angry if you suggest Lorroakan can't hurt Aylin:

Isobel: Even after all she's been through, she thinks herself unstoppable - invincible. It all feels like recklessness to me. Player: Lorroakan can't harm her. Have faith. Isobel: He can harm her. Just as Ketheric did. She'll survive it, but she can suffer like any of us - and for longer.

Using Isobel's words verbatim is a good conclusion to my thoughts here, I think: the truth of Aylin being "singular among us all" coexisting with all the ways Aylin is "just like any of us".

And now I'll pay the cute Aylin screenshot tax one last time.

[glitter-stained]

Please do tell us about your literal head canon. I’m so interested. I’ve seen your post on what Outlaws should be, but please let us dive further!

So for a moment there I thought you were talking about that joke I once made about giving the canon head and was very confused lmao.

That being said, wrt the canon that exists in my head (aka complete rewrite of Jason's Red Hood run but I'm head of dc editorial): with pleasure! This should also help understand the context of the fic I'm writing rn!

Glitter's complete Jason Todd Head canon (the canon that is in my head)

Batman and Robin 2025, Batgirl and Robin, Nightwing Annual

> First there's the Extended Robin Run: this one I won't spoil because I'm actively working on writing it and it's not necessary to understand the continuity: it's a bunch of jaybin stories intended to fit into Jason's post-crisis robin run and develop it, give it cohesion while also exploring themes such as class consciousness, trauma, mental illness etc. It's not related to the rest of the continuity in so that it's meant to be understood as an expansion of canon rather than a replacement of it, but I do like to think there's a logical continuity between this one and the stories/themes/idea in the Red Hood rewrite so I think it's worth mentioning.

Now onto the meat of it. I do wanna say first thing first, I don't like the ambiguity around Jason's age in the og Batman Annual/Lost Days storyline and the way it seems to serve some psychoanalytical/psychophobic plots, and the whole point of the rewrite is a big fuck you to DC's bias and attempts at manipulating our empathy. Ergo: Jason crawls out of his grave three years later than he does in canon and is sixteen at the time he comes back to Gotham.

Batman: Antigonish

The UTH. Often from Bruce's perspective, lots of Edgar Allan Poe references. Also lots of disguise fuckery. Because Jason looks and is so young, and mostly because I like it, we're leaning fully into the horror genre. Jason, crucially, is not a crime lord in this one.

The main plot points:

> Jason, in disguise, visits Judy Koslovksy in prison (she had actually been convicted after the canon events of The Dumpster Slasher) and tells her to get in contact with her lawyer. Jason then steals evidence, leading to Judy winning her appeal and getting out.

> Jason begins a campaign to demonstrate that Bruce's campaign of ruling through fear cannot work if he never kills anyone ever. To do so, he targets several people who he believes are 1) key players into systems of oppression/mass violence and/or 2) criminals who he thinks are never gonna change their ways and deserve to die for the horror of their crime. Amongst these targets are (amongst others) Black Mask, an extremely corrupt and wealthy politician, and the cop who sexually abused Jason as a child (this one is implied rather than developed because we'll address it properly in its own time, which we get to do because I'm the head of dc editorial). To start his campaign of terror, Jason adopts the identity of the Red Death and sends several unnerving threats to his targets urging them to quit their activities (leaving bloody handprints on their doors, burning stuff down etc). Jason goes after his victims covering himself completely in blood and gore from the slaughterhouse he keeps breaking into, and makes a ghastly apparition. Jason's game doesn't scare the targets (at least not at first not before the first victim) so he goes after them to kill them. He also sends messages/hints/general psychological fuckery to Bruce about his death, actively haunting him.

> Jason's murder always have a veneer of legitimate self-defense, always make it seem like hey the bad guy did it to himself he could have just not tried to attack Jason with a knife Jason just accidentally diverted that knife in their throat, etc. There's a criticism of the pointlessness and hypocrisy of Bruce's line in Jason's eyes, with lots of references to Starlin's Bruce's deadliest moments (ie locking someone in a room in the subway to die).

> Because this is right after Steph's death and "Who killed Stephanie Brown", Jason is haunted by a hallucination of Stephbin who follows him as an incarnation of his rage and guilt. She is in the robin suit and despite Jason having seen pictures of her he can never recall her face, her image looks like someone has smudged black sharpie all over her face.

> Black Mask, having seen what Jason did to his other targets, eventually flees Gotham after Jason cuts him off from his support and sends a rocket into his building, almost exploding him. From Bruce's perspective, this is evidence that fear>death does in fact win, a reasoning we're meant to find flawed (// Bruce's reasoning about Felipe in Diplomat's Son).

> Jason may be a killer, but he's far from cold-blooded about it (yet). After he goes after his last target and ends up fighting on a balcony in front of roadwork, the villain tries to push Jason into the roadwork down the street; Jason defends himself but ends up accidentally pushing the man and watches him die a painful, horrifying death in some kind of press, a much more gory and terrible death than originally planned.

> Having retraumatized himself, Jason cries on the balcony, the rain washing the gore off his face, and then picks up a red hood/mask get-up and assumes the identity of the Red Hood to go to Arkham and kill Joker, knowing that Bruce will follow him there.

> The confrontation happens like in canon (oh Bludhaven also explodes) but without explosives because I can't bomb Arkham. Bruce sends the batarang through Jason's neck and he clamps on it, starting to bleed out; but before anybody can do anything, Judy shoots the Joker dead with the phone Bruce discarded, revealing that she'd been tracking Jason to repay a debt and also that she did Gotham and humanity a favour. Bruce hesitates, Judy claims that this time, she won't be condemned for sure, and that Jason is bleeding: if Bruce goes after her, surely he will die. Bruce hesitates but goes after her and arrests her. When he comes back, the Joker's body has been taken by an Arkham guard and burnt, there's a large, large puddle of blood on the floor and Jason is gone.

Nightwing: Ash to Ash

This one I need to flesh out much more but basically, Jason, dissociating, walks to Bludhaven (which just exploded) and finds a dissociating, suicidal Nightwing. Ensues a comedy of horror where both end up convinced Jason is dead and his ghost is haunting Dick, with classics such as Dick telling Jason to go away and stop haunting him, Jason almost jumping off the roof, Dick hauling him up and begging him not to leave him, nobody being okay enough to wonder why Dick was able to haul the incorporeal ghost up the ledge and some kind of weird "you don't die and I don't die/leave" pact with your ghost dead brother who's not actually dead. In the end, Dick is a little more stable and Jason decides he doesn't need him haunting him anymore and leaves; Dick wakes up and calls one of his friends and finds evidence/realizes that Jason was actually alive the whole time and not just a hallucination but it's too late, Jason is gone. Dick is the one to inform the hero community that Jason is back, but is in crisis/need of help. Idk if it's shown here since this is Dick's POV, but Jason is also absolutely still hallucinating Steph.

Green Arrow: Double Red Daisies

Seeing Red rewrite! Again, not extraordinarily fleshed out, but the idea is that I wanna keep the parallels and Mia's story, the fact that this is foremost a Mia story where she views Jason as a dark mirror she's terrified of becoming, and the contrast between Oliver and Bruce's parenting, while also pushing the reader to feel empathy for Jason/highlighting his, arguably pretty valid, point about teenage sidekicks. In this one, the reference to Jason's csa backstory is explicit and not open to interpretation. At the end, having been thoroughly rejected by Mia and her conviction that she'll never be like him, Jason leaves.

Red Hood: The Hourglass

Voluntary time-loop time! A mini where Jason finds a time machine and attempts to solve his death/relationship to Bruce/be saved in time/save his mother (Catherine)/save his mother (Sheila) and restarts the time-loop again and again and again. The point is the heartbreaking realisation that you can't fix trauma, you can never save anyone, it already happened, you're never going to have been saved. However it turns out this isn't a time machine but some kind of dream/stasis machine. In the end, someone (Black Canary) ends up freeing Jason under Barbara's lead; it's revealed she's monitored his comeback but cannot bring herself to approach him.

And at the end, training montage! Jason thinks back on everything and decides he was fucked because his hands shake when he holds a gun since the events of Antigonish, so he practices again and again to become more cold-blooded, convinced this is the only way to survive. We are officially entering Red Hood's most ruthless era.

Red Hood: War Hounds

Jason voluntarily enters an illegal fighting ring (dog fight symbolism be upon ye) lying that he is 15 and portrays himself as super vulnerable, and successfully catches the eye of the child trafficking ring he's been tracking due to its ties with Black Mask (who has continued its activities outside of Gotham after Antigonish, surprise surprise). Jason is then sent to a facility that attempts to train child soldier, where he is the oldest, older than their recruitment age. There, the children are trained for combat and murder, and the staff uses torture to "break them". Jason meets and protects the oldest of the kids, a ten years old red head girl called Sasha. She calls him out on some self-destructive behaviour and he replies he has nothing to live for. A couple of Jason torture sequences later, he sneaks into an office and steals intel of their communication with Black Mask. He sends Black Mask false info while pretending to be the head of the ring, then steals a chess piece from the chessboard. He then rescues the kids, going through the facility in a one-man army and either killing or locking anyone he meets up. He tells the children to run, and then goes back to set the whole facility on fire (yes, with all the people inside it; I did say it was the ruthless era.) When he comes back, Sasha is watching the fire and tells him she wants to be like him. He tells her not to and she tells him he was wrong about having nothing to live for because he fights like a survivor.

Batman: Hour of the Mask

Very chess-themed!Jason's plan for torturing and. killing Black Mask goes awry when it turns out Steph is alive. Between Steph finding out about what happened, Black Mask thirsty for vengeance, a righteous Batman and a furious Selina,

Jason, with Batman hot on his heels, still manages to kidnap Black Mask and is found by Steph first; finding out then and there that she is alive, he pivots to offering to kill him for her or letting her do it if she wants; she hesitates but can't bring herself to do it or let Jason do it. They are interrupted by Selina, who decides actually, she wants to be the one killing him for what he did to her family. To give her time, Jason surrenders himself to Batman, smiling even as he kneels with his head behind his head and is taken to Blackgate, looking very much like the cat that got the canary.

Red Devil #16-17: Sympathy for the Devil

Jason escapes Blackgate by poisoning the food of a whole lot bunch of rapists, child abusers and human traffickers (how he managed to do that selectively is future me's problem). He then comes to help Eddie Bloomberg who is struggling with something, but does so in disguise, under an anonymous identity. The two have intense chemistry, they're both such yearners. Despite Jason's acknowledgement that he is a person from Eddie's past and refusal to confess to who he is, they end up kissing about it (well, Eddie kisses Jason's mask) and then Jason ties a scarf again Eddie's eyes and gives him the mother of all blowjobs. At the end of the story, Eddie finds himself in love with this stranger from his past, and Jason realizes that his childhood crush never went away and finds himself in love with Eddie, and thus decides to leave him because he's decided that's something too precious to ruin and he won't be able to take it when Eddie finds out who he has become and abandons him.

Red Hood: Ash Wednesday

Lost Days rewrite! (Taking a page out of Winick's book and putting this flashback mini right after Jason's most brutal crimes to bring back empathy for the character and remind the reader of how young he is to be doing such things). A whole bunch of horror elements in that one too!

We see over the course of the year a progression of a freshly resurrected Jason from his jaybin era to developing his philosophy in Antigonish. This arc has no psychoanalysis, no Talia character assassination (idfc about Death and the Maidens and you can't make me), issue titles are a bunch of "First" because it does follow a teenage/child development/coming of age structure, ie First Steps, First etc. and the last one: First Kill. We also see Rena for the first time since the Jaybin era! She's back in Gotham for college and trying to uncover Jason's grave by washing all the dirty/abandoned/unreadable tombstones in all the cemeteries in Gotham. She started this work as at fifteen but had to leave because of her dad's work and promised Jason she'd come back someday. The panel of her leaving the cemetery in the evening, hands covered in dirt and exhausted, is of course immediately followed by Jason, an alley after the one she was working on, crawling out of his grave alone that night.

[rambling-red-wizard]

DC Creature Commandoes- Trauma vs. Justice (spoilers!)

I just got done binging the current episodes of Creature Commandos, and at risk of painting myself as some sort of high-brow snob, I think the writer, Mr. James Gunn, has done some pretty genius work. Now, I'm no media critic, and not nearly as media-literate as I should be at my age, but I am a trauma survivor; and the thing that I've noticed about this series is that the main cast- Nina, Dr. Phosphorous, The Bride, Weasel, and GI Robot- all have flashback scenes that, while providing a reason for A.R.G.U.S. to imprison them, are far less focused on that than the characters' trauma. Amidst the gore-splattered scenes of carnage, we get flashbacks to the deaths of friends and loved ones, dreams unattained, and in the unique case of The Bride, pursuit by a suitor she does not want. It's all set up in a way that makes us feel bad for the Commandoes- and of course my ever-mounting hatred for Amanda Waller helps in that cause. What it does NOT do is use that trauma to justify their actions. Dr. Phosphorous is pictured to have slaughtered a crime lord and his family, and taking his throne in order to live a life of hedonism. Frankenstein is seen to have killed multiple people he knew and had meaningful relationships with in cold blood, as soon as they became an obstacle to his all-consuming quest for The Bride. The Bride slaughters indiscriminately, and without qualms, making several allusions to the inferiority of human beings (though I'm not arguing with either of her sets of guns- insert obligatory character design nosebleed. Come on, it's tumblr.) The Weasel is capable of no more than base cunning, with his only interactions being comprised of incentivized behavior- play a game, have a treat, act in the interest of more games and treats. None of this is disputed. No attempt is made to justify it. Yes, they killed. Yes, they will again. No, it is not right or good. And in a medium where storytelling so often defaults to 'if there is a reason, it must be justified', it is a breath of fresh air. Being traumatized does not make anyone's actions excusable. The characters are monsters, and the show expertly explores how they got there- what makes a monster in the first place. No amount of past abuse towards a sexual assailant, a neglectful parent, or an unhinged killer can wish away the consequences of their actions. Neither the narrative nor the characters ever once speak up to say 'this isn't fair.' Because it may once have been unfair- but they are not the same anymore, not the victims anymore. Apologies for the essay, my friends! A good evenoonlighting to you all.

[a-doubleh-x]

Why I like Charlastor

The other day I noticed there was some negativity in the Charlastor tag, including antis and people feeling the need to defend against antis, so I thought I might as well take a step back and just write candidly about why I like the ship.

I only got into Hazbin in October of last year, but already it has inspired me a lot to write and fantazise about it. Like most people, I started with the classic "they look cute together", but as I kept looking I couldn't help but think there was something else to these two than first met the eye.

For starters, I love Pollyanas! I think they get a bad rep for being naive, but I just appreciate an optimist like Charlie who just wants to make people around her happy because it makes her happy. I also like bad boys 😳 I'm a pretty heteronormative guy, so I haven't had a big chance to explore that part of myself yet, but I do like the danger and excitement someone like Alastor brings to the table.

I will admit when I started writing Charlastor I felt like I was handling dynomite. It's a lil scary to ship a boundless altruist with a manipulative sociopath, but bear with me.

I think each of them has something the other needs. I think Charlie needs someone to challenge her, someone to steer her in the right direction while she's mostly isolated. At the start of the series, practically nobody but Vaggie takes her seriously, and Alastor is no exception. He mocks her, teases her, but she still listens and I think it's because somewhere deep down she understands there's something he's trting to communicate in his annoying, but curious way.

Of course, I also love the fanon Charlie who's down bad for Alastor, and even if that Charlie is a little naive, I think it's also sweet and she can use some indulgence while most people treat her like a child.

On the other hand, when it comes to Alastor, this is a bit of a theory on my part, but I think he's secretely lonely. He has friends, certainly, like Rosie and Mimzy, but they're not good enough friends to live together with him. They don't seem to be able to save him from "pure, absolute boredom". But Charlie, for some reason can, even though she's a stranger at the beginning when Alastor chooses to move into the Hotel.

Alastor is not as much of a cynic as someone who chooses to see things in a perspective that benefits him. He doesn't think redeeming sinner is "hopeless", but "hilarious" instead, which has interesting implications to me. That's why he chooses to hover around Charlie, not because he thinks she's lame, rather because he thinks she's silly. She makes him laugh. Which I think is kind of how Alastor sees "love".

And then you have fanon Alastor who, depending on the writer, is either a horny animal, a wisecrack edgelord or a soft boy who's mean to everyone but Charlie XD I like several of those interpretations, but I kinda prefer mine just out of personal taste. I think the best part about Alastor is that he doesn't *care* what anyone thinks of him and always does what he wants, even at the expense of other people, which I find pretty enviable.

They're kinda both outcasts in their own ways. Charlie by being unable to fit in and Alastor being unwilling to compromise. But they don't judge each other. He supports her in his own weird way and she houses him and is delighted of him in general, which is tasty food for his ego. I do wonder why Alastor is interested in Charlie, both in canon and in a fandom vacuum.

There's some cool potential for drama there, but also growth and healing, in my opinion. Personally, I think Alastor doesn't want to actually *hurt* Charlie, but he may hurt those around her, which will be a moment to start settling compromises if Charlie puts her foot down.

That haz bin my review so far! I'm honestly pretty grateful for Vivziepop for all of the work she's done so far, I know directing, animating and writing two shows over the course of 5 year or so ain't easy. I'm also grateful to the fandom who shares their thoughts and vision, which calms the terrible voices I started hearing in my head since I bought this weird old radio.

I'm in the middle of a break, but if you're interested in my fanfics I'll get back to writing very soon. Cheers! 🌈❤🦌

[lostcatinthedark]

Hello to everyone that is finding this Jimin blog! I'll pin this to make some things clear, so please read below :)

This is a blog dedicated to make discussions and appreciation for Jimin's artistry and everything that surrounds him like BTS, the kpop industry, music discussions, etc. This is NOT a blog for shipping discussions. I'm not here to be convinced that xyz ship is real. There are several blogs out there where you can microanalyze what JM said in minute 13:25 of a video to build evidence for your ship or to trash another ship. None of the discussions here will be held under a shipping lense, first because I think that is highly flawed/ wrong and second because Jimin's romantic life/ rumors do not interest me. So whether it's a ship or him dating this person, this actress, this model , that is NONE OF MY BUSINESS (And frankly it also shouldn't be yours). So if you insult me because I don't entertain that IN MY BLOG, you will be blocked. We can still have discussions about the idea of shipping for example and it's connection to the kpop fan experience, or how parasocial relationships are so prevalent in this part of the industry. Even about the narratives that sometimes shippers create to either antagonize him or fetichise him. Those discussions are always welcome.

I think Jimin's artistry and journey should be more appreciated on its own. As I've said before, I think Jimin's work and the way he approaches his art is so rich. There are so many things to explore, from his musicality, his songwriting, to the expresiveness in his dance or his very unique voice, as well as his charming and interesting personality that of course creates a beautiful bond that I'm sure has turned many people into his fans by now. Even talking about demographics and how his presence has carved into different spheres of the entertainment industry: movies, fashion, marketing, etc. Also discussions about fan culture and the way companies use or misuse its values are welcome! You are free to offer criticism about any topic as well, as I will probably do with due respect.

So with that said, welcome and thank you for reading!

[madlori]

I'm asking this to you because you're the only person I know who's been around fandoms for so long — do you find this shipping-situation weird? I've been in many fandoms but I've never really seen this insistence on there being only one acceptable ship for a character and encouraging the idea that anything other than the norm is almost sacrilegious. Almost every big fandom over the years have had multiple conflicting pairings, take for example, Marvel. Even works of media that have a canon romantic pairing have had fans who ship others with the leads (that was what shipping was tbh) and no one has ever shown up to their doorsteps with pitchforks in hand, at least not that I'm aware of. So I guess I'd really like your opinion on why you think this is happening now? Have things always been this way, just not in plain sight? Is this just the new fandom culture that is developing now with the influx of younger people? Or is this fandom an aberration where a group of people are so used to being the majority that they simply aren't taking well to things not going their way?

I've been thinking about this today, and I'm still not sure what I think.

I've been in fandoms with a hugely dominant ship before. I've been in fandoms that had ship wars. I've been in fandoms with a lot of peacefully co-existing ships. I'm not sure this fandom is really all that different. To answer your first question, no, I don't find it all that weird. In fact I sort of expected it.

Let me tell you a story about the Brokeback Mountain fandom, which managed to have a ship war despite having really only one ship, the canon ship. So BBM fic fell into several broad categories, the biggest of which were fix-the-ending/canon divergence fics and the straight-up AU fics (I wrote one of each, lol). Post-canon fics weren't as common, because you had to deal with one half of the canon pairing being...well, dead.

There was a post-canon fic that gained a lot of fans...and when I say "fic" that's really an understatement. It was a SAGA, and I don't use that term lightly. It was a series of like...6 or 7 epic 100K+ word fics and it was over a million words total. The author would put out more than one 5K chapters per DAY. I'm still in awe of this woman's output. But it was the content that created the issue.

(Brief recap for those who have not seen BBM - two ranch hands in the 1960s, Ennis (Heath Ledger) and Jack (Jake Gyllenhaal) spend a season herding sheep together, have sex, form a bond, then separate to go about their expected hetero lives but get together for fishing trips every year or so to have sex and spend time together. Jack wants more, Ennis is terrified. Both marry and have families. Eventually Jack dies in what is implied to be a gay-bashing but who knows, and Ennis makes his peace with the love he'd felt for him)

The saga picked up a couple of years after the film's events. Ennis decides to tentatively explore what being queer means, goes to Laramie, finds a gay bar, and very cautiously enters. Through a Series of Events he gets mixed up in an assault there and befriends a local sheriff's deputy, who is also gay. They begin a relationship.

Now, this series was COMPLEX. A huge cast of characters, a long and thorough evolution of this relationship, a lot of angst over Jack's memory, and it really worked for a LOT of readers. The new love interest she created was a really great character.

For others...it did not work and they hated it.

The animosity between fans who loved this saga and those that did not grew pretty heated. This was like '05 so there was no twitter or tumblr, this was all on LJ and dedicated fandom forums (some of which banned discussion of this fic for this reason), but there was doxxing and namecalling and real vitriol.

I guess my point in all this is that when there's strong feelings, some fans will find a way to be horrible to each other.

I was in the Sherlock fandom, another fandom 98% dominated by one ship. There were other ships, but somehow they seemed to co-exist mostly peacefully barring some snide remarks and rude comments (I could be wrong about this, if you asked someone who shipped a non-Johnlock ship they might have a different answer). No, the insanity in the Sherlock fandom was not ship-war-related.

I was also in the Criminal Minds fandom, which has a whole bunch of disparate ships and no ship wars that I can recall.

Then there are other fandoms, like Avatar, with TERRIBLE ship wars that are still going on.

I don't think the situation in 9-1-1 is as unique or different from other fandom wanks as has sometimes been asserted. I think terrible fandom wars are sort of inevitable, whether they're ship related or not. But for what it's worth, here are some of my thoughts on what's going on here.

A loooooong time (5.5 seasons) with one very dominant non-canonical queer ship. No other ship really ever approached the level of saturation or devotion of Buddie.

A pervasive belief that this ship might possibly become canon. That's a feature a lot of other ships do not have.

A lack of intense devotion to any of the other love interests. BuckTaylor was never a challenger to Buddie. Neither was Eddie and Shannon, or anybody else. It's hard to fight when there's no worthy challenger.

But now? BuckTommy is not only canon, but it has a lot of fans. It's a threat. And it's not only a threat in a feelings kind of way (as in, people like a thing that is not the thing I like and it makes me upset) but there's a perception that it's an ACTUAL threat, as in if people like this ship and promote it, it could cause it to become a permanent relationship (the degree to which fan response actually affects how the show unfolds is...debatable).

I do not personally think this is the case, but some fans strongly believe that Buddie could still happen if it weren't for BuckTommy. So if you're still wanting Buddie and believe it will or could happen, the existence of an alternate love interest represents a direct obstacle to that happening. That's a heck of an incentive to hate that competing ship. I get it.

That...might be a somewhat unique situation. There's a fight now because there's a challenger who might actually stand a chance.

This goes along with what we saw in the immediate aftermath of 7x04. I read someone else say (apologies, I don't know who it was, feel free to @ me if it was you and I'll credit you) that the early post-7x04 enthusiasm and acceptance of Tommy reflected the belief that he was temporary. A lot of folks thought it was just a way for Buck to get with Eddie, like, very soon after that. But the more time went by, the clearer it became that this was not the plan or the intention. So the mood soured for those who were still pulling for Buddie.

Other fandoms I've been in with a hugely dominant ship...Sherlock and X-Files are the two that spring immediately to mind...there was never a challenger with any legs. X-Files fandom wank was between the ship and the...lack of ship, shall we say. But a concrete, tangible "opponent" makes a fight so much more visceral, doesn't it?

I do think there's been a fandom shift towards needing ships to be canon that I don't really get, but it's there. There's been a lot written about fandom culture in the last ten years, the breakdown of boundaries between fans and creators, the access to those creators, a sense of ownership/entitlement, purity culture, obsession with shipping "correctly" (which leads into wanting things to be canon for the validation)...these are all newish features. So pile that on top of 9-1-1 having a longtime single ship that's legitimately threatened for the first time in its existence by a competing canon ship and it's kind of a powderkeg.

No wonder it's caught on fire.