#beau's 'how did we miss this guy' haunts me to this day (in a fun way)

[spottedenchants]

who was vence?

Vence! What a guy...

Vence Nuthaleus, earlier known by the Mighty Nein as 'Blondie', was once the annex of Ludinus Da'leth and helped set off Abyssal rifts within the Dynasty as part of the Angel of Irons. He was framed to be involved in the theft of the Dynasty's two beacons, and was imprisoned Empireside and later exchanged alongside the Dynasty's second beacon for Adeen Tasithar during the peace talks to end the War of Ash and Light.

(Adeen may or may not have had some sort of involvement with the Angel of Irons and was the Taskhand who Essek framed for the theft of the beacons, as he messed with Adeen's memory in some capacity. Adeen seemed to recognize Fjord-as-Vence, but was very confused about it so idk)

[readbythestarlight]

c2e42

I just came in with Taliesin saying “Candyland for Goth kids” what are we talking about

“Everyone’s fuckin’ Avantica!”

Liam calling out Laura for shaming him xD

A: “People have learned not to tangle with me.”

F: *awkwardly coughing* “Yeah, oh, yeah, uh, who would want to fall in with that.”

I swear this tavern music makes me think of Skyrim every time. Is that what it’s from?

lol the gnome’s voice is amazing

Cad: “I could fill a book with what I don’t know” mood

“Bar fights are fun! It’s part of the reason we live here!” xD

Oh lord Jester

Gonna bar fight this gnome oh lord

CAN WE GO LIKE TEN MINUTES WITHOUT BAD DECISIONS

I love fun as much as the rest of you but come on guys

Jester’s gonna get her butt kicked by a gnome lol

J: “I’m gonna pat his head and cast ‘cure wounds’”

Everyone: “Awww!”

Caleb honey it’s a pirate cove do you really think there’s a bookstore??

Cad: “Somebody worth their salt, since worth your salt is a really nice phrase, I like that. Worth your salt.”

Guyssss I love Caduceus

He’s very caught up in how much salt is worth now it’s amazing I love him

“If things go correctly, I don’t think there will be any worry of drowning” why does everything she says sound sinister now. Everyone seems spooked every time she says something.

OOOO SOMEONE WITH BAD BLOOD WITH AVANTICA

The Diver’s Grave

I don’t like that

“Turtle Boy”?! Bitch you leave Orli alone

Oh lovely a haunted ocean graveyard

Yoooo sea shanty

Gaaaasp Matt is actually singing it

Uhm guys I need to hear him sing NOT in a funny accent??

I missed the whole song i was distracted by Matt’s singing

Okay I’ll listen this time

“Her hungry eye” DONT LIKE

“With the Missus”?

I bet Avantica dumped Allison for Ukutoa :P

Avantica at some point, probably: “Relationship with Allison: ended. We stan Ukutoa now"

A: “Wouldn’t want to cause a ruckus the same day you arrive, no? Who would do that?”

The M9: “pssshh what, a ruckus? What? Nahhh.”

Cad’s high passive perception is so nice

lol Beau fail

Sam and Marsha are CHILDREN pass it on

J: “I think we’re all kind of murderers sometimes.”

Caleb, internally panicking: “I don’t think aLL of us are murderers.”

“What’s the shadiest thing you’ve ever done” Oh Jester don’t ask

Aww Jester :(

J: “What if we can never go home?!”

C: “We’ll… we’ll get you home…”

Poor Jester’s having a rough time

“You said her name, when we were dancing.”

Ouch Jester maybe now isn’t the time…

“She was handsome” I’m having feelings

Hnnn Fjord you’re acting a bit shifty again just tell your friends honestly what’s going on without acting so strange with them

Cad: “What part of the body are amigos?”

Listen, I’m gonna always miss Molly, but Caduceus is the best thing that could have happened to this group.

Oh sure give these poor people the ship y’all STOLE brilliant idea :P

Oh boy they fucked up Vera heard

“Tiffany”

Guys don’t discuss it here right now even with code names it’s a bad idea

Tiffany and the Apricot Tree

Mmm I’m not sure that this plan seems like a good idea

“We’re calling him ‘Honda’” I snorted

“Bitch I work here”

“THE TWO CLERICS ARE NOT GOING ON THIS MISSION” finally an intelligent decision

“A peeping tom cat”

This is going to go wrong somehow. I’m not sure exactly how. There are too many possibilities. But it will go bad.

Oh lord.

If Fjord gonna accidentally interrupt Avantica and Allison?

lol wrong room

Damn I really hoped he’d accidentally walk in on something

Fuck is Fjord having to sleep with her again

Mmm a book. You should absolutely not take it.

Fuuuuuuuck

she’s gonna know

GET THE FUCK OUT

This is literally such a disaster they are making the WORST decisions

And now they’ve broken the rules of the cove too

JESTER YOU HAVE MENDING JUST FIX THINGS?

crawling under the bed

oh godddd

IM DYING

I swear Nott and Jester get so fucking lucky

Aaaaand now Nott’s gonna end up drunk

Oh lord and now she’s confused

SO

FUCKING

LUCKY

oh no

“He uh, he got stabbed…”

“I was so hoping you were gonna attack her” lol Matt

Oh sure just keep making holes until you end up under water

STOP WASTING THE PAINT

Can she not mend the hole??

Beau don’t accuse Caleb of trying to rob you honey that’s terrible

Beau honey

don’t

Cad: “Waldoc got stabbed? But Waldoc’s so nice! Who would stab Waldoc?”

Caduceus is a good boy

“I’m gonna be Keg��

“I’m gonna be Molly” JesTER NO

omg

they

caused a dude to jump off the crows nest

This is just… a disaster

Beau gives so much sass

“There’s been no word but I assume there’s just pandemonium all over” Caduceus knows

OH NOW SHE REMEMBERS MENDING

N: “Are you saying to me that WE made a MISTAKE?”

And Taliesin loses it

Cad’s right, they should go to “check” on things.

Caduceus with all the killer perception rolls helllll yeah

Caduceus just healing everyone like the sweet boy he is

“I love this character so much” SAME

like y’all as much as I loved and will always love Molly… Caduceus means so much to me

F: “We should frame Vera. She hates me, she wants my job.”

N: “Well didn’t you steal her job…?

Oh shiiiiiiiiiit it’s her dream journal

Do you think Mandarin somehow marked Fjord without Fjord knowing?? Was he prepping Fjord?

Ohhh or maybe not, since apparently he had a change of heart

WOAH BITCH SHE WHAT

AVANTICA IS TOTALLY GONNA TRY TO SACRIFICE FJORD TO UKATOA

“perhaps this one will be more useful than Vandrin” fuuuuuuuuuuck dont like dont like

WHAT OMG THAT NAT20

CALEB YEAAAAHHHHHHH

he got the exact DC

amazing

“you motherfucker” I love how they keep just obliterating Matt’s stuff and he’s just so done

Oooo a no poison necklace

They should really think about this over a nice long two break

I feel like this plan is not great…

But I feel like that about most of their plans

ohhh no

Taliesin is like “we had a plan but sure go ahead and change things it’s fine”

Oh please make that check

please

oh no

15

that can’t be good enough

they’re dead

they’re dead she knows they’re dead she know they’re dead she knows

THEY CANT LIE TO HER HER PERCEPTION IS TOO HIGH

“Whoever did this doesn’t understand the rules of the city very well”

SHE

KNOWS

oh god

oh god Vera can track

CALEB WHAT ARE YOU DOING

WE HAVE TO WAIT TWO WEEKS

IM

GONNA

DIE

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

im literally silently screaming in my house at 1am

akljBJLDHSGSJFHGADalkhg

[rootbeergoddess]

Tunnel of Love

A commission for one of my all-time favorite Rooker Hookers, @rookerstash-after-dark featuring Alan Pangborn from Dark Half. Get ready for fluff and a date to the Carnival. if you like this story, leave me a tip!

“Y/N, your gentleman caller is here!”

   “Marie, stop calling him that!” You shoved your co-worker. “He’ll hear you.”

   “What should we call him?” Tom, the line cook, asked. “Your beau? Your future husband? Your man?”

   “If I ever die before both of you, I’m haunting your asses,” You said with a smile. “Now hush up.”

   Thank god Alan hadn’t heard that. You didn’t want him embarrassed. Yes, you knew Alan had a small crush on you. If there was one thing Alan Pangborn wasn’t, it was subtle. He also wasn’t the best liar when it came to women. Yes, he was talented at getting confessions out of people, but when it came to ladies, he got nervous. You weren’t sure how. Maybe it had something to do with his divorce two years ago.

   Sheriff Pangborn was a regular at the Dixon Diner. Everyone in town knew who he was. The town wasn’t that big. But he did his job well, and people respected him. How could they not? Plus, he wasn’t too bad to look at.

   “Hey Y/N,” Alan grinned at you.

   “Hello Alan,” You placed a napkin on his table. “The usual.”

   “Yes please,” He said. “It’s been a long day.”

   “Uh-oh,” You put his order in. “How bad?”

   “Well Miss Jenkins lost her cat again, so I had to spend at least an hour trying to find Mittens,” Alan began. “Turns out he was just hiding under the porch. Had to give him some tuna to get him out.”

   You smiled as you listened. This was the norm for you two. Alan would come in for dinner, get his usual order and then you would ask him about his day. Since the town was so small, Alan was usually stuck with dealing with little town problems like missing cats, helping someone crossing the street or making sure no one stole from the Ma and Pa store on Main Street. You enjoyed listening to him talk about his day though.    “Order up!” Tom said.

   You grabbed the plate and placed it in front of Alan.

   “One double-decker cheeseburger with sharp cheddar, no onions and extra pickle on the side,” You said. “Want a refill on your cola?”

   “Yes. You really are a marvel Y/N.”

   You couldn’t help but smile. God, why was Alan so cute? You had known him all your life. The two of you had grown up together. He had lived across the street from you. When you had been younger, the two of you had butted heads. He was a smelly, gross boy and you were a prissy, silly girl. Yet Alan was still kind. One time, some boy had pushed you over and threw dirt in your face. Alan then punched the boy in the face and knocked a tooth out. Thankfully, neither you had gotten in trouble. After that, Alan walked to school and then walked you home.

   Throughout the rest of school, you two remained good friends. Now that the two of you were adults, you wanted something more than friendship. You wanted Alan’s affection. After his divorce, you had been thinking about it a lot. Part of you reasoned that since he was single, it was alright for you to make your move. Another part of you thought that it might be too soon despite his divorce happening two years ago. You also weren’t sure if there were rules to this. How long did you wait to ask someone out after a divorce? Was there a certain way to ask them out? Was it bad sportsmanship to do so?

   The argument inside your head was driving you insane and the more you thought about it, the more frustrated you became. Alan had always been a constant in your life but if you made your feelings known, what would happen? Would you ruin everything?

   “Hey Y/N?” Alan suddenly asked.

   “Yes, Alan?”

   “You know the carnival's in town,” Alan said. “It’s a good one I hear.”

   “Oh yeah, I saw! Man, I haven’t been to a carnival in years! Those are always so much fun.”

   “Well,” Alan started tugging at his sleeve. “I was thinking of going tomorrow, but I don’t really want to go along. I thought you could maybe come with me?”

   Your whole body froze for just one second. You could see Marie and Tom grinning at you like Cheshire cats. Gulping, you turned around ready to answer.

   “What do you know! Y/N has tomorrow off!” Tom said. “Isn’t that right Marie?”

   “Why yes, yes she does!” Marie turned to look at you. “Y/N, why don’t you go? It could be fun?”

   In your head, you reminded yourself to buy both your co-workers nothing but underwear for Christmas. Maybe some socks too.

   “That sounds like fun Alan,” You said. “I always love hanging out with you!”

   “Great! How about I pick you up at 4pm?”

   “Sounds like a plan to me!”

   It was a perfect autumn night. Alan parked close to the entrance. Once he parked, he came over to your door and opened it up, letting you out. Alan was wearing some jeans and a striped blouse. It was odd to see him out of uniform, but he looked adorable. You were wearing a knee-length polka dot dress with some leggings and flats. Hopefully, you looked decent. It had been a while since you had been asked out on a date.

   However, you weren’t sure if this was a date. It was two close friends going to a place together. Technically, it could be considered a date, but you decided you weren’t going to be heartbroken if it turned out not to be a date.

   “Ready?” Alan asked, offering up his hand.

   God, he was so cute. Trying not to look like an idiot, you smiled as you took his hand. He smiled, making you almost melt. God, why did he have to be so handsome? He was killing you.

   The two of you made your way into the carnival. Alan wrapped an arm around you, making your heart beat like mad. Why did he make you feel giddy like a teenager? Either way, you were going to enjoy this. The first thing you did was one of those silly carnival games. You were shocked when Alan managed to win a prize for you. He had gotten all ten rings on the bottle and was awarded a giant, pink teddy bear that had a bow around its neck.

   “Oh Alan, I love it!” You said.

   It was big, flashy and cheesy but you were going to treasure it.

   “Cute isn’t it?” Alan grinned. “Not as cute as you.”

   You giggled, blushing slightly. After that, you went on the carousel. Then, you played a few more games and got your palm read by some old lady pretending to be a fortune teller. She told Alan he would be a doctor who retired by age seventy while you were going to be a fashion model with three kids. After a few more rides, the two of you decided to grab some food. You two managed to find a corndog stand. Once you two had your corn dogs, you sat down at a table.

   “Man, I haven’t had this much fun in ages!” You said with a big smile

   “Same,” Alan smiled at you. “I’m really happy you came with me.”

   “I’m glad you invited me,” You admitted, blushing a bit. “It’s been awhile since I’ve been out with someone.”

   “Can I be honest?” Alan said. “I was afraid you’d say no.”

   “What? Why?”

   “Well,” Alan sighed. “I thought that you had a boyfriend already. I mean I knew you didn’t, but I couldn’t be sure. I mean someone as pretty as you probably has fellas lined up waiting to ask you out.”

   Of course, you didn’t have a lot of guys falling over themselves trying to get your number but the fact that Alan thought that? It was flattering. He had also called you pretty. Again, you felt giddy like a schoolgirl. God, why was he so sweet? You couldn’t believe he thought that you were pretty. Hearing him say that he thought you were beautiful made you feel happy. When was the last time someone had said something so nice to you? You couldn’t remember.

   “Um--I know this is kinda silly but--the night is winding down, and I was wondering if you’d like to go on the Tunnel of Love ride?”

   Had it been anyone other than Alan asking you, you would have said no. It was really hard to say no to him. He looked so nervous when he asked.  

   “I’d love to Alan.”

   This was your first time on a Tunnel of Love ride. They were always featured in old-timey carnivals, and you had some a few of them in cartoon shows. Alan helped you get into the seat before sitting next to you. When he sat down, he yawned and wrapped an arm around you. Okay, the move was a bit dated, but you were too happy to care. This date was going so well you weren’t going to ruin it.

   The ride started up, and you snuggled close to Alan, leaning your head against his shoulder.

   Once you were inside, you felt a bit cold. You shivered, and Alan rubbed your shoulder. God, what a great guy. As the little car, you sat in continued, you heard the music play. You recognized the song as the Bee Gees’ How Deep is Your Love. You glanced over at the classic Romeo and Juliet scene performed by cats. As you continued along, there were dogs dressed up as Sleeping Beauty and her prince, the female dog lying on a pet bed. As cheesy as all of this was, it was adorable.

   As the ride continued, you were content to just snuggle up with Alan.

   “Y/N?” He suddenly asked.

   “Yes, Alan?” You looked up at him.

   He stared into your eyes before kissing you on the lips. It was a short, sweet kiss but it left you stunned. When he pulled back, you could see Alan looking at you hopefully. You smiled and placed your hands on his face. Then, you pulled him forward to kiss him. His arms wrapped around your body as he deepened the kiss. You only stopped kissing because you felt your lungs begging for air. Once you had stopped, the two of you stared at each other before Alan grinned.

   “Wow,” He said, his grinning getting bigger. “That was---I mean---wow.”

   “I’ve rendered him speechless.” You said with a small chuckle.

   “It’s just---I haven’t been kissed like that in ages. It was--wow.”

   “Did you get me on the Tunnel of Love just to kiss me?”

   “Well, maybe. I was a bit nervous about going for it. I didn’t want to embarrass you.”

   “Such a gentleman,” You said, tickling his chin. “So ready for kiss #2?”

   “God yes.”