#bc i'm mentally ill wooo

[beanghostprincess]

guess the hyperfixation but it's extremely obvious and i literally spent all my money decorating my room with op things

[tea4br3akfast]

Having a crisis! Wooo! Everybody say 'I <3 mental illness' This'll be quite venty and stuff so feel free to not read if you don't feel like reading about some random traumatized teen venting. I'm genuinely torn, and everything is happening, and I can't remember the last time I showered or changed my clothes and I'm just so tired of everything. I'm going to a new high school next year (moved from my last one bc of bullying </3) and I'm just so nervous and kind of upset too and I'm just feeling a lot of shit, and nothing is happening but also everything is flying by too quickly. I don't like this. I don't know what to do. I'm always tired, I'm always hvngry, I'm really restless but also, I've been consuming at lot more NSFW than normal and I'm a little upset at that? I'm nervous that next year will bring a lot more bad people into my life. Like I've made it this far getting bullied, physically, sexually and emotionally abused and manipulated by 3 different people. And my old school was small (like, 125 people total) and my school next year has like 1600 people. And I'm so nervous! I'm an abuser magnet at this point and I KNOW a horrible person is going to come along and do something. My 3D has been thriving off of the stress which is an unintended bonus. But I'm sad because I read that st@rv@tion should kill libido and I still have libido which sucks and makes me feel all weird and gross and dirty but also good but not at the same time?? I don't know if it'd be weird to ask for advice under this post but uh, I don't know. I just wanna talk to SOMEONE about this so I feel like I'm not losing my shit over something literally normal or something.

[aprillikesthings]

It's 2:30pm I've had breakfast and coffee and my adhd meds, let's go

EDIT I got partway into the second episode wooo

okay so you know that moment of Catra THONKing her head on the locker that I couldn't stop laughing at yesterday? I recorded it with my phone just now, including me laughing

OKAY THE VIDEO SHOULD WORK *NOW* Anyway now you know I watch all of these in an open tab of Netflix. I don't even fullscreen it bc I'm constantly bouncing between that tab and this one.

(The long fic that is the whole reason I'm rewatching is the left-most tab in case you were wondering--it's literally the fic, netflix, this tab--mmmmost of the rest of the open tabs are other fics, the wikipedia list of episodes, a couple of fanvids, and a bunch of meta)

Also my laugh sounds weird to me here I blame my allergies

Also I really did have some wine last night, huh

OKAY back to Glimmer giving Scorpia that little speech

And yeah I know I just mentioned the parallels between Catra and Glimmer, but like--Catra also did this. She also gassed up Scorpia with the specific intent of encouraging her to do something she wanted Scorpia to do (attend Princess Prom).

And neither of them said anything un-true! But they were still both manipulating her for their own ends.

yeah! by blowing it to smithereens

Anyway back on Beast Island they're trying to gtfo

Except Entrapta doesn't want to go D:

Like she flat-out says, "I'm staying."

There's creepy-ass vines climbing all over everything and knocking out some of the power

"-was so confusing. I just wasn't suited for friendship. I belong here."

(Ohhhhhh I get it--it's the same "crippling self-doubt" thing this place does to everyone.)

ALSO THAT'S CREEPY

She-Ra is just like, Absolutely Not

Man I feel bad for both of them. But also there's a bunch of creatures with sharp teeth surrounding them

Anyway the fight scene that happens is too much to go into detail about, but Micah gets bit, a much bigger creature attacks them, the vines keep trying to take over Entrapta who keeps saying variations on "nobody understands me, that's okay, just leave me here"

Those vines are a great Metaphor for some kinds of mental illness, like depression--that lie to you and tell you this kinda shit.

Bow, who is as always Mr. Emotional Intelligence, says "Did you think friendship is easy? It takes WORK to be there for other people!"

Bow: "Because we're not EVER going to leave you behind again! And we never gave up on you, even when you were with the Horde! Because that's what friends do!"

(oooh that's some tasty foreshadowing! Seriously this is a great scene in general but also HMM who else might they not give up on)

(...wait multiple people actually now that I think about it)

;_;

OH GOD Micah's magical protection shield breaks and Adora, bless her, is like "WE ARE OUT OF TIME. Entrapta, we flew here on an ancient First Ones ship."

Adora might be a littttttle infantalizing in tone here but tbh it worked, so

lol there's more monsters so Entrapta calls her robot to beat them up

"I'm glad we're friends."

(Ugh they wrote Entrapta SO WELL. Like yes it was her special interest that got her to want to leave, but she does care about her friends and she makes an effort--and it's obviously AN EFFORT--to thank Bow for being kind to her. Her words sound slightly stilted, bc saying these sorts of things is a learned skill that doesn't come naturally, but she still means them!)

I had a split second of confusion before realizing this is definitely Double Trouble lol

headcanon: when Double Trouble is alone, they twist their hair all the time the way I do

OH GOD oh shit okay I'm going to just copy/paste from the fanmade transcript:

Double Trouble: I was looking forward to meeting this Entrapta character before I left Bright Moon. But of course, as you know, she wasn't there. Hordak: What did you say? Double Trouble: Oh, you don't need keep up the charade with me. I figured out the truth. You had Catra send Entrapta to Beast Island, so She-Ra would run off to rescue her. A brilliant idea! The perfect distraction. I have to applaud your work, you really had me going. So scorned by Entrapta's betrayal. ...Even now you look like you had no idea! Double Trouble: Brava. I mean, I did consider the alternative...

Double Trouble: That she made you think she was your partner in crime, while really she is the one who betrayed you... Double Trouble: But between you and me, there's no way she's that good of an actor. Double Trouble: Well, I'll leave you to it. Congrats again. Great work all around.

OOOOOH DOUBLE TROUBLE IS SUCH A LITTLE SHIT (and I love them)

Hordak is so pissed he blows some shit up. And shows A Real Human Emotion!!!

in the meantime, they got Entrapta et al safely on the ship

but Bow properly tells the ship to take them back to Bright Moon

And the Horde sends off a bunch of troops as Double Trouble watches and says, "Too easy, as usual."

to quote Double Trouble themself from an earlier episode, "Espionage is a long game, kitten."

OH HO THEY'RE IN CONTACT WITH GLIMMER!

(Oh, that means Double Trouble didn't actually escape, they switched sides, right)

AAAAAUGH

Glimmer and Scorpia teleport out JUST as Bow, Adora, Swift Wind, and Micah show up oh my god that is some Shakespeare-level shit. Like the "camera" backs up and we see Glimmer and Scorpia sparkle away JUST as everyone else runs in from the side D:

But yeah Micah goes looking for Glimmer (his daughter he hasn't seen since she was A CHILD) and

this BITCH

Micah knows what's up. "What is this traitor doing here???"

Catra doesn't know Hordak knows oh god do I hate this my adrenaline is through the fucking ROOF, she just knows Hordak wants to talk to her

Yeah she only barely gets missed by a blaster shot

NOT EVEN USING HER NAME, HUH

AAAND ROLL CREDITS

okay just gonna jump into the next episode, will reblog only when I run out of images

Adora: Stay here, King Micah. The Sorcerers Guild is on their way to help protect Bright Moon. I promise, Your Majesty, we'll bring Glimmer home to you. Swift Wind, take Bow and Entrapta to the Fright Zone. Find Glimmer, we can still stop this. Bow: What are you going to do? Adora: I'm going to the Crystal Castle. I have to keep Light Hope from activating the Heart of Etheria.

She turns into She-Ra

Roll intro!

I usually skip the intro but

eheheheheheheh

*ahem* anyway

oh lord that door is going to open to something

I WAS RIGHT

Scorpia tries to say Glimmer's "a new recruit! Glimmax....Pinkhairton."

Okay but also Lonnie is clearly on Scorpia's side here. "We thought you got out??? If Catra sees you here--"

One of the themes of She-Ra is actually that bad and abusive management causes high turnover. (Like for real my manager is great and that's why I've been at my job eight years.)

Lonnie: "But you're one of us, Scorpia. We won't stand in your way."

Which makes Scorpia emotional

ANYWAY back to Hordak's perfectly justified temper tantrum at Catra

Catra continues to play the "She was a traitor!" card. Anyway he just keeps blasting and she just keeps running

Hordak: "And after I'm through, you can't even begin to imagine the punishments Horde Prime will inflict upon you."

Everyone in the Horde is literally like "Just wait til your father gets home!!!!"

Hordak is just blasting shit all over the place as Catra runs!!

And I've run out of images again, time to reblog

The next episode itself is a two-parter, and I think that rather than split them up I will just watch through, which might mean I have to reblog this post multiple times.

Finishing out season four!

s4, eps 12&13 Destiny

Usual reminder: this is a REwatch and there’s spoilers ahoy, I make a lot of bad jokes (some of which are Adult In Nature), I reference other cartoons, I make random asides.

(also, this time specifically, I had some alcohol)

Tbh? it's a lot like watching things like this with me in person aaahahaha I always want to pause and infodump shit -_-

lol Emily is destroying Shadow Weaver's garden

Emily acts like Mal the cat does sometimes. WHAT IS IN YOUR MOUTH you are not supposed to have that! Get out of there!

UGGGH

it's easy to forget how BIG Scorpia is??

LOLOL oh my god I went downstairs for like an hour and a half talking to my partners about the most random shit and then playing with the cat and also: I've had most of a can of wine.

One of these:

YEAH (that's a huge image)

so if these get weird: blame the wine I guess

oh also @corpseauthority and I picked out fake fur and minky fabric for the ears and tail of my Catra cosplay :D :D :D I'M SO EXCITED

OKAY BACK TO SHE-RA

the only thing better than Scorpia's "huh?" is Shadow Weaver's flat "what"

Shadow Weaver: no we need the other princesses Glimmer: well they're gone but-- Scorpia, Shadow Weaver, and Emily: WAIT, WHAT???

AND THEN

okay but is the guard telling you this Double Trouble

ROLL INTRO

that thing was not meant to hold four humans and a horse with wings

why are you SNIFFING HIM

Entrapta: "I don't know you" Micah: "Yes, you do. You stole my food." Entrapta: "OH YEAH! It was delicious :D"

oh god Adora's like "....but are you okay? we came here to find you 🥺"

and she's like YEAH I'M GREAT

"each more deadly than the next??? it's PARADISE"

I love her so much oh my godddd

Bow: "We're here to rescue you" Entrapta: "didn't I just rescue YOU?"

Bow mentions Hordak and Entrapta pulls her little new bug-eye mask down :(

Adora: so hey we uhhhhhhhh really need your help due to a terrible secret of the First Ones that nobody but us knows

"WHy didn't you say so???"

well that's a callback to s1 ep1

THERE SHE IS!! MY BABY 😍 I LOVE HER SO MUCH

nooo

anyway Kyle, Rogelio, and Lonnie come in and Catra's like OH UHHH so...what's happening

Lonnie: "we just got back from conquering another Rebel town" Kyle: ":D You should've seen us!! It was all:"

and then he kicks Scorpia's old locker, with the drawings on it, and Catra gets mad

Ironically the degree to which Catra is UPSET is making me ship them harder lol

bb you need a break you are getting feral

Man Lonnie has her number lol. "What is wrong with you? We're winning! Even you should be happy."

god I love when she's this deranged

she slams poor Lonnie against a locker

john cena dot gif

but also OH DO THEY REMIND YOU OF WHO YOU USED TO BE? HMM? what you really wanted??? what actually gave you something like joy or contentment????? are you trying to just erase any part of you capable of feeling good?????????

Kyle is RIGHT

The cinematic parallels between Catra and Glimmer in this episode ("forget my friends I'M IN CHARGE HERE and YOU NEED TO FOLLOW ORDERS") are *chef's kiss*

Catra realizing this isn't what she actually wants: part ....a lot

STOP REMINDING ME I HAVE FEELINGS!!

The other three leave, she yanks the drawings off Scorpia's old locker, then THUMPs her head on it. And then Double Trouble shows up!

okay wait tho the way she pauses and then thumps her head on it is so funny I wish I could gif it, it's so cat-like and also Very Emo

I don't think this is supposed to be funny but it IS and I cannot stop rewinding and laughing. I blame the wine.

THONK

help i've rewatched it like five times now

okay

lol right??

Me, when I was info-dumping my own fic at myself: is it weird to imagine these two banging??? Me now: nope

Double Trouble: "Apologies for the delay, kitten. I got ...held up...in Bright Moon"

Anyway they give a little speech about how the Princesses keep fighting and She-Ra is away

NO SHIT, SHERLOCK

(now THERE's an old fandom reference ahahaha)

"We can't let them return to the Fright Zone!" TOO FUCKING LATE

YOU STOLE HER GARNET YOU WOULD THINK SO

Anyway they argue about the possibility of Glimmer taking Scorpia back to the Fright Zone

GOD I HATE IT WHEN SHE'S RIGHT UGGGHHHH

lolol I am. like. less than ten minutes into the FIRST OF TWO EPISODES and i've hit the image limit.