#bc aegon the conqueror would never allow himself to be killed in a fight he couldn't win or risk his own children's lives.

[imaginarianisms]

no bc i'm thinking about what rhaena would've thought about maegor's death & his burial place. wishing she would've slit his throat with blackfyre (which she perceived to be Her sword) while he was sleeping. she believed maegor's life was hers to claim (& not to mention she actually Did try to kill him on their wedding night) for him murdering aegon (although she believed aegon. technically brought that on himself) & then for torturing viserys to death & then him forcing her to marry him against her will & then assaulting her. multiple times. when she finally finds his burial place after commanding elinor costayne to tell her where he was buried, she completely desecrated his burial place, sobbing and weeping uncontrollably & finally letting the emotions that she'd hide deep within herself for so long for so many years. & like. given her horrific traumas suffered at the hands of maegor, her many flaws & problems & issues aren't. that surprising. her worst behavior only occurred After maegor died & the years of trauma & abuse turned her into a cold & bitter woman. like. jfc i wonder why lmao. it's definitely giving "hide me there under the leaves, nine going on eighteen, lay it on me / tell me a story about how it ends where you're still the good guy / i'll make pretend / 'cause i hate this story where happiness ends and dies with you / i thought good guys get to be happy / i'm not happy / i am poison in the water and unhappy / a little girl who needs her daddy real bad / in the corner of my birthday / you watched me dancing right there in the grass / i was too young to notice that some types of love could be bad / praying i'd be like you doing all of the things that you do and that scares me / i'm tired of you still tied to me (bleeding whenever you want) / too tired to move, too tired to leave [...] (it's just the way that you are) / i'm too tired of you, too tired to leave (i just wanna sleep) [...] (please, can i sleep, can i sleep?". & maegor's impact on rhaena & her trauma surrounding him abusing her lasted long after he died. its just. literally so heartbreaking honestly. rhaena would genuinely find it difficult to open up to Anyone about what she's experienced so when she finally meets elissa, she feels like she finally found someone who could be a companion that wouldn't leave her. then it. didn't turn out that way. opening up was extremely difficult for her to do so when elissa left her to sail the sunset sea she uh. quite literally never recovered from that. that was her last straw.