#bc I've known that I wanted top surgery for like 6 years now

[hopelesslygaysstuff]

Random post that has nothing to do with fanfiction lol

I just made an appointment to potentially get a top surgery consultation with a surgeon that has a lot of great reviews and is in the city I'm originally from and where my dad lives, and ya'll I literally can't stop crying like it was so scary but also I need this so badly and I am finally making steps towards making it happen

anyways i will probs delete this in the morning but ya i didn't have anyone else to tell at the moment cause it is 3 am

[midasinc]

good day, sir. spare a moment for our lord and saviour trans!enjolras?

i will ALWAYS spare a moment for him. these r modern au thoughts bc im totally drained rn but i have many thoughts overall

-i know im alone with this one, but i love the thought of enjolras coming from a family that loves him and he was comfortable around. his parents are both like nerdy people- both of them are professors- and they were his best friends for most of his childhood (they still are)

-anyways, they kind of picked up on him being more tomboyish than other girls his age when he was growing up and they let him wear the stuff he wanted to wear and play with the toys he wanted to play with.

-because of all of this it was easy for him to transition at a pace he felt comfortable with when he got a little older. he had the spunky blue hair phase and his dad went shopping with him for clothes and both of his parents were genuinely understanding when he experimented with labels and names and stuff. they believed him when he said that he wasn't totally sure of himself yet, but he wasn't a girl and that was that

-uni is when he really starts understanding himself. he's not sure how he feels about top surgery yet, but he feels okay with going on T when he's 21 and (i've talked about this before) he does have a humiliating experience where his voice drops in the middle of a long-winded speech at a meeting

-i also love acne!enj and going on T really changes his skin and he hates it. he hates himself for a long time because he never had issues with his skin before but now he's just got so much acne and he feels childish when people think he's a teenager because of it and he feels unattractive. enjolras doesn't care about most things individual to himself, but he's still a person. it takes a couple years for him to adjust to acne and tell himself "i am still worthy of being listened to and loved without clear skin. clear skin does not make me more important of a person"

-he's 5'7 on the dot. god he wants to be taller. enjolras wears a lot of platform shoes so he's 5'9. he also stands on his soapbox to be 6 feet. he's nonironically looked up "height extension surgery" before, bless his heart. some of us are short kings, we can't help it

-enj doesn't get top or bottom surgery but he thinks he's alright with it. later down the line when he knows what his stance on having a family is and what he would feel most comfortable doing and whether he has the money to do so, he might change his mind, but for now he's okay with binding

-anyway trans enjolras is MOST IMPORTANT enjolras, let it be known