#at this point it feels like fred thinks we're overreacting and we dont know the real rusty

[andichoseyou]

quick question. so my friend group has been having some "drama" these last few weeks and i need an outside view. one of our friends, lets call him Fred has started dating a guy, lets call him Rusty. fred and rusty have been together a while but the rest of the group doesn't really know anything about rusty. one night, we end up at fred's house and rusty is there. that night, rusty says some really nasty and antisemitic things while we're watching a movie, none of us know what to say and we're all hoping that fred will call him out and tell him to stop. rusty continues and says things like "this is making me hate jewish people even more" and called a jewish female character a "dirty jew bitch." that night we also learned from one of our friends in the group that rusty has said "yellow people" when referring to asian people. he has also said the G slur when referring to asian people. we sat down and talked to fred a couple days later to tell him how uncomfortable and disappointed we were. its been almost a month later and fred is still with rusty and keeps deflecting when we ask him about it. saying things like "he says racist things but i dont believe he is racist" and "i am trying to challenge him." i don't think he understands how hurt we all are that he continues to stay with this guy who has said some really fucked up shit. it has gotten to the point where none of us even want to be around fred. i wanna know if anyone thinks we're overreacting or handling this wrong... we have poc in our friend group, and fred is a white/non-jewish man who has never experienced racism and never will. it feels really strange to me that he would bring rusty around knowing he says those fucked up things. we literally have an asian friend in our group who has expressed they cannot be friends with someone who has a boyfriend who is xenophobic. like DUH???? from an outside view, knowing only these details, do you think we should try to continue being friends with someone who is not willing to break up with their racist/antisemitic boyfriend? or is it valid that we're still hung up on the fact that he would even want to be around that guy?