#at least we won't know til we get laura on 4sd again

[cringefaecompilation]

okay actual serious ep80 thoughts now

first things first: "tHeY didn’t LeArN aNyThInG" feels like it’s really reductive. i think people came into this expecting all of their communication problems to be insta-fixed so that they can be a perfect cute little found family and that's just not how bh rolls. i do think that it was a much needed diversion from them constantly forcing themselves into third gear (along with the wok sledding, everyone forgets the wok sledding) to stop the bad guys. other people have pointed out that if not given any instructions they’ll be fine with opening up to each other and being genuine, but they froze and immediately started getting antsy the moment they were told to. i just think that’s funny.

i don’t think imogen and laudna are hypocrites. rather they’re very much stuck with their own traumas and assume that their experiences are universal. imogen thinks she was born cursed and that everything in her life has just been set up to punish her for something she inherently deserves. there’s an abusive cunt off the port bow trapped in laudna’s head that she literally had to force herself to walk away from (and make saving throws to stop) to not be forced into hoovering up that shard without her consent.

they both saw fearne shrug off dozens of times she could have died horribly or faced terrible consequences and get off scott-free and missed the forest for the trees. they want her to take power because she can actively consent to it rather than be slapped with insane power at a young age and then forced to course-correct, which probably explains why they got so angry at ashton for "tricking" her: they saw it as them taking something she could use to better herself.

and on that note, laudna telling fearne she’s glad she could make her choice didn’t feel like it was backhanded, envious, bitter, none of that. i think she genuinely does see this as fearne making a choice on her own behalf in a way that she is incapable of.

the whole kerfuffle with callowmoore didn’t make me hate the ship, but it did make me even less fond of the fans of it given the shippers who turned on ashton saying all kindsa nasty shit that got disproved in the 4sd. i’ve always preferred the idea of a slowburn with these two because ashley has said fearne is unsure of how she would handle love or a relationship herself and now taliesin has said that ashton finds themselves unlovable.

as much as i joke and bitch, i don’t think that everyone’s been "forcing the ship" so much as they’ve been assuming that the constant flirtations between the two of them will make them more comfortable with taking the shard and meeting in the middle. the two of them deciding to be friends for the moment is far superior and makes the slow burn way more likable because now it’s something on their own terms rather than them getting together because they were told to.

irregardless of it stays platonic or develops into romance "callowmoore is abusive" is a terrible take no matter if you like the ship or hate it and i hate that it got blown so far out of proportion anditmademelegithateanothershipbutlikethatsnotimportantrightnowandidontwantpeopletogetmadatmeokay.

and yet! there’s always going to be this huge discomfort of the fact that fearne was always unsure about taking it, didn’t explain why she was unsure to anybody expect for chetney (and orym should have fucking said something), and then just decided to take it just so people would stop hassling her about it. she wasn’t forced into taking it but she certainly was backed into a corner about it. she did not ever want it but she saw that it was making everyone really upset and took it because hey, might as well.

"we all might as well" is something everyone’s been saying and while everyone else has their reasons for making the best out of a terrible situation, fearne notably did not have the exact same problem that most of them shared (i have this insane power inside me threatening to blow at any given second that i just have to live with on a daily basis). she wasn’t even aware of the raw deal she had been saddled in her existence with until it was pointed out to her!

long story short the main problem it seems that bh has to get over is just assuming they know what's best for each other. it should’ve been fcg and i will die on that hill. let ashton have a robot sister.