#at least pay jackie young..

[sw6eet]

daily reminder the aces have been caught paying multiple players under the table and have received no punishment for it

[shaunamilfman]

Being Jackieshauna's Controversially Young GF

pairing: jackie taylor x r / shauna shipman x r note: yes, i will always manage to make it about jackieshauna.

Jackie definitely brings a “we saw you from across the club and loved your vibe” energy to the party, and you’re just kind of glancing at Shauna glaring at you over her shoulder. like, does her ass know that? Shauna’s all for it, but the glower takes breaks for no one.

Shauna loudly refers to you as their daughter at least once to embarrass Jackie. preferably right after she’s kissed you in the grocery store. Jackie tells her off for the whole drive back, but Shauna's ass does not care. hands at ten and two on the wheel and the smuggest fucking look on her face. loses the attitude when Jackie starts throwing blankets on the couch, but it’s over for her at that point.

Jackie’s introducing you to all her friends without shame, and Shauna’s just daring someone to say something.

You start to wonder if Shauna’s main reason for dating you is all the opportunities it gives her to embarrass Jackie. One of their friends asks where you met, and Shauna says something like, “Jackie stole her from the cradle.” Jackie’s over there doing a spittake as she nearly chokes on her wine. she just loves to make Jackie squirm.

Now, if someone else makes a comment about it? Jackie’s going to have to drag her out of there or blood’s going to be spilled.

Jackie insists on making you watch the "classics," but it’s mostly just beaches over and over again. she refuses to move on. Shauna’s three glasses of wine in before the movie even starts. she’s seen it so many times she can recite it line by line.

Shauna throws Star Wars in there, but it’s mostly just because she knows Jackie's sick and tired of watching it. Shauna's got to get revenge somehow.

Shauna comes up behind you and just stands there, glaring at anyone that tries to approach you. God forbid you mention having to meet someone at the library for a project. you’ve never heard a more terrifying “Oh?” in your entire life. she’s dropping you off in her little minivan like your a child. talking about “I’ll be back in two hours.”

Jackie consistently tries to match your schedule to stay up with you, but it's always lights out for her at 10 PM sharp, no matter how hard she tries. she’s so competitive with it though, so sometimes the two of you just have to pretend you’re going to sleep so that Jackie won’t be an absolute nightmare in the morning. she wakes up once to find you in the living room doing something else after you've “gone to sleep” and won’t speak to you for at least a day.

Shauna likes to teach you how to cook (spices who? ), but Jackie always hovers around giving bad advice. They end up bickering about it every time, and the food gets burned. Shauna’s so frustrated she can barely look at Jackie, and Jackie’s ass is skipping over to the takeout menu drawer.

Jackie and Shauna have separate bank accounts just so Jackie can make Shauna pay for dates still. It’s the small things.

Shauna’s more self-conscious about initiating PDA, given that she’s a lot more aware of the age difference in a way. Jackie’s always the one to initiate it first; whether it’s holding your hand or practically climbing on top of you, trust that Jackie does not care.

Jackie’s way too invested in any of your friend group gossip. she’s expecting daily updates. Shauna “doesn’t care” and yet still knows every detail. interesting.

Any argument Jackie is losing, she pulls the “listen to your elders” card. It’s the only time you’re ever allowed to acknowledge that she’s older than you, unless it’s to call her a milf. she’s partial to that, no matter how much she pretends not to.

Shauna tries to give you advice that you barely listen to because her life is a train wreck. Let's be honest, she pulled Jackie by accident. Who else was going to match her freak?

Jackie’s embarrassedly knowledgeable about slang for her age. you’re not sure what's worse: Shauna purposely using it wrong to embarrass you, or Jackie using it correctly at her advanced age.

Every gift you’ve ever received from the two of them has been one that Jackie bought and put Shauna’s name down on. It’s not to say that Shauna can’t get thoughtful gifts, but if it’s from the both of them, it’s really just from Jackie. Jackie thinks you don’t notice, but she always overexaggerates Shauna’s bad handwriting when signing the card. it goes from being slightly unreadable to looking like a five-year-old wrote it.

Jackie tries too hard with your friends and always comes off as the like “cool mom” type. she’s out here offering snacks. shauna’s making it awkward by asking one with a Nirvana shirt to name five songs.

[munsonsreputation]

she's just too soft for all of it

steve harrington x fem!soccer player

word count: [2.2K]

warnings: warnings: no use of y/n, established relationship, mentions of reader being tough / mean to her teammates, cursing, fluff, stevie being a supportive bf, flirty steve & an even more flirty reader

summary: you're captain of hawkins soccer team, known for being a bit tough on your girls but stevie knows you're not a meanie -- you're really just too soft for all of it... or at least when it comes to him.

“Get it to-fucking-gether, Jackie! You’re fucking up the momentum.”

Your hands clapped sharply against each other, chest rising in order to catch your breath from the last play. But in that same breath, not wasting the precious time out using it to rally your teammates together.

It had been a brutal first half of the game, and the pressure was on. Everything was on the line for the chance to qualify for nationals and win it big for Hawkins High. It wasn’t the best performance all around for you or your team, but you were determined to get everyone on the same page in order to walk off the field victorious.

“Is she always this mean?” Dustin muttered, nudging Steve with his elbow.

Front row in the stands sat your boyfriend and your supportive friends. The home crowd surrounding them, keeping their eyes and ears peeled, trying to get a glimmer of what the captain had been shouting in the huddle.

For the people farther in the back they could only make out a few words over the noise and by your facial expression alone, they could you weren’t being the nicest — when it came to this type of pressure, there was no room to play nice captain anymore.

It was time to toughen your girls up and light the fire under their ass to get it together.

“Listen to me, we all need to start pulling our fucking weight! Pay attention to the goddamn ball and for fuck sake don’t let them slip you up!”

Steve didn’t tear his eyes away from you, watching as you tightened your ponytail with a snug pull before gesturing your hands towards the field, eyes darting between each of your teammates as you told them what worked during that last play and what needed to change.

He nudged the young boy back, eyes still on you as he shook his head, “She’s not being mean. She’s just doing what she has to do to get everyone on track.”

Sure, Steve wasn’t the basketball captain for long nor was he ever the leader that you were, but he knew a thing or two about getting everyone’s head in the game. Truth be told, Steve thought it was pretty cute when you asked him for a little advice to help you be the best captain you could be for your team.

He surely didn’t tell you to go cursing like a sailor….that was all you. But he loved it — it showed how passionate you were and how much you wanted this not only for yourself but for the entire team.

The red head Max butted in, poking at Dustin’s cheeks, “You can’t handle a little profanity? You know she’s a softie at heart. She never speaks to anyone like that when she isn’t on the field.”

Steve grinned, chuckling at the banter from the kids, something about the boys always getting cursed at but never El and Max because they were you favorites — he knew it was true, but it was fun hearing the girls pretend like they didn’t know it.

Mike scoffed, turning his attention back onto the field. “I don’t know why we’re even having this conversation right now when the only person she’s ever going to be soft for is Steve.”

“Maybe if you didn’t ditch your girlfriend for some stupid board game, my girl wouldn’t have to curse you out for being such a douche bag.” Steve reminded half-jokingly.

Laughter filled the already noisy bench until they heard a chorus of claps.

“Don’t fuck this up! If we can make this play, then we can take it home, got it?”

He watched as you patted the girls’ backs, shooting each of them a tight smile that others would read as passive aggressive, but it was far from that. It was stern yet loving, encouraging and sure that whatever was going to happen next was going to be okay — that you were proud of all of them for their hard work and there was always going to be a next time.

There was a harshness to you when it came to the sport you loved, but it was all for the greater good of making your teammates better and ensuring you always left the field winners in your heart…even if you didn’t get the score.

“Got it!” The girls all chorused around you before you all jogged back onto the field.

“C’mon baby,” Steve murmured to himself, elbows resting on his knees as he zeroed in on the game, leaning closer to make sure he didn’t miss a single second of it.

Green jerseys got into position, but the only one Steve was paying attention to was you. Even from your side profile, he can tell you still had that crease between your brows and your eyes were staring daggers through the opposing team.

Games days were intense ones, no matter if they were away or at home. You took each game seriously and nothing was going to throw off your focus, not even him, which is why he never took it personally when you didn’t wave hello to him when he and your friends arrived.

Still, he never missed out an opportunity to hoot from the sidelines as you warmed up, whistling a “That’s my baby!” every time you drove the ball into the net.

Even with your game mode on, he could see the smile and blush creeping up on your face followed by the giggles of the rest of your teammates teasing you.

But there was a sort of guilty pleasure that he felt when you were riled up and in the zone. It was the complete opposite of who you were when you weren’t on the field.

Off the field, you were the sweetest girl he’d ever known, so gentle and easy going. But out here, there was a completely different side to you, almost animalistic, stalking your prey, doing everything in your will power to tear them apart.

Was it bad that he wished he got to see that side of you more often than not?

“Let’s go, girls!” You shouted, nodding your head to yourself as the game resumed.

The brisk air floated across your skin while your feet picked up the pace. Eyes darting in all directions of the field, watching the ball carefully. Cleats dribbling the ball, back and forth and side to side, just waiting for the right moment to strike.

“I’m open, Nat!” you called out, sliding away from one of the girls on the other team, as the ball made its way towards you before you could even finish the sentence.

Your lungs take in a deep breath, trying to stabilize the rush in your veins. The only thing you’re listening for are the commands of your teammates and the encouraging whispers coming from the boy on the bleachers.

Even in a moment like this, where time seems to freeze, you can still make out his hushed cheering, careful not to throw you off focus, but he won’t — never does. In fact, you feel like it’s some sort of superpower when you’re in the zone and can still feel him in your bones.

An out-of-body experience, as you take the opening right when you see it, not letting a second go to waste as you scurry to the right, keeping the ball close, but never far enough to let it get away. It’s only a millisecond later that you seize that exact moment, swinging your foot back as your girl’s watch yours.

And like that, you knew it was up to skill…but Steve knew yours never failed.

His body shot out of the bleachers with his fists held up high before the ball even made it fully into the net because in his bones he knew.

“That’s my girl!” He shouted loudly.

The crowd erupt with claps and cheers all around him as the whistle blew, and the refs held their arms up, signaling the victory.

“Oh, my god!”

You spun around, jumping up and down as you felt your teammates surround you with a hug. Kisses to cheeks and curses of victories screamed in the best way possible. You instantly searched for Jackie, swinging your arms around her neck as you hugged her tight.

“Sorry for being a bitch,” you whispered in her ear, as you felt her laugh against your neck, hugging you impossibly tighter, “Your bitchiness got my head in the game, so thank you.”

“Good game,” and “thank you for the opportunity,” were exchanged with the girls on the opposing team. Sure, you had stalked them like your prey, but at the end the one thing you all had in common was the love for the game. And for that, it meant a lot getting to share the field with anyone who loved it as much as you did.

Only then, when made your way back to the sidelines, did your waist meet the hands of your biggest fan. A giggle escaped your lips as screeched, being lifted off your feet with kisses pressed all over your sweaty cheeks with no care in the world.

“You did incredible.” Steve beamed, cupping your face in his hands and finally laying one on your lips.

Quickly you pressed back, relishing in the feeling of something this rewarding after a game like that, “I can’t believe I did it.”

It’s quite endearing to see you in such disbelief while he knew you would be able to do it from the get go. Your cheeks are flushed red with excitement and your eyes are still wide like how you’d been out on the field watching the ball shoot into the goal.

He can’t help but pepper away those feelings of disbelief, replacing it with laughter and squeals as he continues laying kisses all over your face.

“Well, believe baby, because you’re going to nationals, and you’re gonna kick ass…again!”

You don’t try to stop him no matter how sweaty you are — you’ve gotten too used to these kisses and receiving them after a big win is just as special as the ones he gives you on any other given day.

“Did my score look cool?” You sought when he finally pulls back to stare at you once more.

“The coolest ever.” He smirks, squeezing your waist.

Steve says that about every goal and intends to until the end of time because every kick is the coolest.

“I hope they got it on tape so I could watch it back.” You say, jutting your chin out to the videographer up top on the bleachers.

“Hmm, I hope they got your little pep talk, too.” Steve teases, voice lifting.

You pout, raising a weak fist that meets his shoulder with no impact. You know I hate having to be mean.”

“I know, but it’s cute. They all know you’re just doing it to get their head in the game.”

“Yeah, I know… but I could get my head somewhere else, too.”

It’s your turn to wiggle your brows with a smirk while Steve’s cheeks go pink with a wide smile appearing on his features. There was a never dull moment between you both, not after a win, and surely not even after a loss.

“You just scored a winning goal and you’re trying to get into my pants already?” He accuses, shaking his head with feign disbelief.

You shrug your shoulders, tightening your arms around his neck to bring you closer to him.

“What can I say? I’m ready to celebrate my way.”

“Am I just an object for you?”

“Yup, an object of my affection and love that is.”

You press a kiss to his lips, letting go of all the pent up pressure from the game and leaving all that toughness on the field. When you’re with Steve, there’s no need to act mean or tough — no need to worry about winning or losing.

There’s a sense of peace when it’s just you two together — even out here on the crowded field where everyone is ogling their sights on the Hawkins so called bitchy soccer captain who actually isn’t such a thing.

Steve brings himself to pull away, patting the small of your back. “Go celebrate with your team you minx then I’ll take you home and we can have our own little celebration kay?”

“On it.” You give him a stern nod, spinning out of his arms and back towards your teammates who are already whistling and teasing you about lover boy.

It isn’t much longer until you’re hoisted up on the shoulders of your teammates and a chant starting to ring through the air.

Steve knows that you’re a winner every day on this field and off — but he also knows he’s one too when you’re the one he gets to call his girl.

💌 reblogs, tags, comments, + likes are greatly appreciated! leave a comment and let me know if want to be added to my taglist!! 💌

a/n: hey everyone!!! im back and i hope you guys like this. i've been on hiatus for a while mostly due to not having a lot of energy and motivation to write, but also because life has been all over the place. now that school is coming to a close im looking forward to finding the time to write some more!! i missed you all so much and im happy to be back

taglist: @translatemunson @kennedy-brooke @manda-panda-monium @tvserie-s-world @givemeth @steveharringtonswife @astolenkiss @loving-and-dreaming @awkotaco24 @engenelxver @elfiaaaa @pbs-theundeadmaggot @johnricharddeacy @gaysludge @keerysfolklore @micheledawn1975 @ihatepeanutss @bakugouswh0r3

[a-short-alien]

JASON!!!!! I love him oh so much it’s actually incredible he looks a little funky in the doodles but it’s okay don’t look at that

In this AU, there was actually no plan to kill Jason. The Joker had decided that the reason his original plan of “getting his own Robin” didn’t work because he just picked some random kid. He decided this time, he needed to get a real Robin to fill the roll. So he kidnapped Jason during one his and Batman’s more heated fights and essentially convinced him that the Batman had left him for dead while Bruce was entirely convinced Jason had been killed. Jason, similar to Clown was put into intensive near daily training, but Jason being… Jason, he resisted quite a bit, causing the Joker to be much harder on him. Clown tried his best to look out for Jason (not fully understanding why he was there) for those months. Whenever he wasn’t busy with training, Clown was usually there to distract him from their current situation. Jason, though young and full of rage, seemed to understand why Clown didn’t fight back, he didn’t feel like he should have to pay for a fight their fathers were having, so they got along well. Some nights they’d talk for hours about really anything but Batman and the Joker. After around six months of this though, Bruce found out Jason was still alive and being held captive. In a moment of desperation, he rushed over to collect Jason but Joker found out. This led to him moving him to a warehouse, trying to threaten the Batman away with harming Jason, but Batman kept pursuit, leading the the Joker simply “giving up” on the operation and blowing the warehouse up with Jason inside. This would become the main driving force that motivated Clown to leave home. After Jason died some of the pieces began to fall together and though, he knew his father was bad he only fully realized in that moment. After leaving, Clown visited Jason’s grave often, at least once or twice a month, apologizing for not doing more, having the conversations they used to have, ect. Once the timeline changed and Jason was back, the two met and became great friends again, especially after Clown detailed the whole “leaving his entire life behind for Jason’s sake” thing. They now hang out every so often, even working together on taking down some drug trades together on rare occasion.

Jason sees “clown” as an insult so he prefers to call him Jackie

Kept their friendship kind of secret for quite a bit so when Dick introduced the two you can only imagine how shocked he was when they got along so well

Though he never asked him to, Clown usually takes off the makeup around Jason just out of respect

The two refuse to tell anyone but Dick how they met and even he’s left in the dark about most of the details of their friendship

Jason loves to flirt with strangers but when they reciprocate he’s disgusted and runs off (aroace Jason is my fav)

They never really tell anyone when they hang out, they just sort of both disappear for 6-8 hours every so often

They actually met back up one of the days Clown had been visiting Jay’s grave and nearly had a heart attack when he just popped out

Bond over the fact that neither of them can use a phone for any reason because Clown was either in the clutches of the Joker or too poor and Jason was Dead so now that they have these little computers at their disposal they’re both completely at a loss

[jackhues]

can we get a lil blurb of jack and mama getting ice cream and chicken nuggets in the middle of the night?

lowkey want to know what they talk about, since they are so close, I feel like it might be a little heart to heart moment between the two of them.

3 am - peanut's world!au

"jack."

no answer.

"jackie!"

jack sniffed, turning over in bed.

"jackson rowdingus hughes!"

"i hate that name," jack groaned, shoving his face in his pillow.

mama made a face, rubbing her eight-month pregnancy belly as she tried to stop little peanut from moving. she was in new jersey with her brother jack this week, and it'd gone pretty smoothly.

she hadn't felt very sick, her feet weren't swollen, and jack was always stocked up on boiled peanuts.

her final night in jersey, and she thought she was good. but of course, her cravings had to kick in in the middle of the night.

"and i hate pregnancy cravings," mama made a face, poking her younger brother.

"ugh, what do you want?" he asked, sitting up in bed, his eyes squeezed shut.

"ice cream and chicken nuggets," mama muttered wistfully.

"who the hell eats ice cream and chicken nuggets at," jack looked at the time on his clock, "three twenty-two am?"

"peanut wants them," mama rubbed her belly, referring to the nickname jack and the boys had given her baby.

jack rubbed his eyes, throwing a sweatshirt over his head and another one over to mama. "c'mon. let's get you and peanut your weird food."

mama put jack's oversized hoodie on, grinning to herself as it now fit snugly on her. she often wore her brothers' hoodies, especially now that they weren't in michigan for most of the year, but they were quite large on her. she'd gotten the short genes.

mama stole jack's slides, humming happily to herself as she made her way to the passenger seat of jack's car. jack tried to be annoyed, but he couldn't really as mama was so happy to be getting her ice cream and chicken nuggets.

he didn't understand where mama's cravings came from, but as long as she was happy, he was happy.

twenty minutes later, the two of them were sitting at a park, enjoying the ice cream and chicken nuggets that mama had been craving. although, jack wasn't dipping his chicken nuggets in the ice cream like mama was. you couldn't pay him enough to try that.

"this is so good," mama muttered. "you want some?"

"i'm okay," jack told her.

"good, 'cause i wasn't gonna give you."

jack rolled his eyes, trying not to laugh, "that's real nice of you. considering you woke me up at three in the goddamn morning to get you your ice cream and chicken nuggets."

"i woke you up and three twenty-two," mama corrected automatically.

jack couldn't hold in his laughter, shaking his head to himself as mama grinned, dipping another chicken nugget in her ice cream.

jack sighed to himself, dropping his head on mama's shoulder as he ate another chicken nugget.

"what's going on?" mama asked, dropping her head on top of jack's.

"just thinking," jack shrugged.

"don't hurt yourself."

"rude," he flicked his older sister.

"you love me."

"unfortunately."

"what're you thinking about?" mama asked, her voice soft as she listened to her brother.

"just thinking... you know how you're pregnant?" jack continued before mama could get some sarcastic remark in, "like, i know i'm only nineteen, and way too young to have a baby, but like, is every pregnancy like this?"

"what do you mean?"

"like you know, the cravings, and the headaches, and being sick?" jack asked. "i know i wasn't there for a lot of the pregnancy, but what i've heard, what i've seen, it doesn't seem like lots of fun."

mama shrugged a little, "it depends on the person, bubba. some people have easy pregnancies, some people have really tough pregnancies. compared to most people, i've got a pretty easy pregnancy. at least, i like to think so. even though i got sick a lot at the start, and my feet hurt when i don't wear nice shoes, and i'm always craving peanuts for some reason... i've got you guys by me. some people don't have anyone. knowing you guys are here... it's a nice feeling. it makes it all a little easier."

jack hummed, pressing closer to his older sister. the two of them sat in a comfortable silence, watching the late night stars twinkle above them.

in that moment, jack didn't mind being woken up at three am.

-

tags : @woodruff-edwards , @austinbutlerscaresme ,  @svechnikovvv ,  @hockeyboysarehot , @emptyflowerpots ,  @mysticaldonkey , @lam-ila ,  @babydollmarauders , @starjoyyy  ,  @kjohnson-91 , @gavinbrindley, @hischierdevils , @jackhughesily  , @panarin10 ,  @equallyshaw ,   @power2myheart  ,  @lynnismypseudonym , @beccaiscold , @akengii , @nowandkei , @cinnamonpancakes , @mitchymainer , @lifeofpriya ,  @marshmallow-babe, @hughesx3 ,  @emsully2002  ,  @starsandhughes , @huggy-hischier73 ,  @doglady5678 , @thatoneblog , @exonct07 @hughesmedicine , @qwanelledingele , @mindless-rock , @ireadthensuetheauthors , @huggy-hischier94, @slaythehousedownboots , @diary-of-jj

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join peanut's world! au taglist!

[aroacedaddytalksshit]

Rottmnt Splinter Age Analysis:

I think Splinter is in his early to mid 40’s during the show and movie. This is how I came to that conclusion.

I’d say Yoshi left his grandfather to pursue acting in America in his late teens, probably shortly after graduating. We see this in his character design during the memory where he leaves. I say late teens and not early twenties also because he says he wished he had payed better attention to his grandfather’s “stories” and not “training” as might be expected if he had started a clan education (beyond ninjitsu training) to prevent the return of the Shredder, which assumably would intensify after graduation

Given his mastery of ninjitsu and combat, it is not unrealistic to assume Yoshi was spotted and cast quite quickly after arriving in America.

From the show, we know Lou Jitsu starred in at least 10 movies (this includes his J.I.T.S.U instructional video), so he acted for approximately 10 years as far as we know.

I say 10 movies in 10 years as straight action movies before cgi had a relatively quick turnaround for production to screen and this would have been the 90’s to early 2000’s but movies with an early career Bruce Lee & Jackie Chan style. Bruce Lee was actively acting for 32 years and made 37 feature films, plus 20 television appearances. So a film a year is being generous given that Yoshi probably did a lot of things for real and not as choreographed stunts, cutting down shooting time and prep.

So that gives us an approximate age of late 20’s / early 30’s for when Big Mama kidnaps him. She probably had him fighting for at least a couple months before his escape given the fact that he was reigning champ but got tired and turned to pacifism. So I’d say at most he was in the Nexus for a year.

We know that the kidnapping by Barry and mutation / lab explosion happened 13/14 years prior to the show’s timeline as Draxum sings so in the show

So this leads me to say Splinter is in his early to mid 40’s during the show

Now I say all this in lead up to my actual thesis point:

40’s is pretty young to have serious back issues (without pre-existing disabilities/heath issues), let alone one that can immobilize him one moment then be totally fine the next (with some realignment)

So I have two possible explanations for Splinter’s back problems:

#1 — Stunt injuries. He was an action hero with a decent career of high intensity fighting movies. Even without injuries on set, stunt work takes a toll on the body

#2 — (the far more sad & angsty reason) Being mutated into a rat has shortened his lifespan. Rats only live 2-3 years on average, so the mutation may have had an effect on his speed of aging

His (presumably) premature greying could also be a sign of the fast aging as greying hair rate has been proven to not be influenced by stress and is purely genetic. He is a grey rat with white hair in the more human places despite having black hair as a human. Additionally, Asians are know to start greying in their late 30’s on average (later than white people but earlier than black people). Grandpa Sho had white hair in flashbacks in the show, but would have been in his 60’s at least when Yoshi left. So I admit it could also be argued that the greying is genetic depending on what age you think Hamatos started their families

Anyways, thank you for reading my analysis rant 😅

I put moderate research in and double checked facts concerning my points, but take this with a grain of salt lol

[izzy-b-hands]

Day Two: Fuckery Or Tavern

A nice, quiet date night at Spanish Jackie's, full of booze and... mostly just that, actually. And the three of them being very relaxed and silly.

Hint of Rizzy at the end, bc i couldn't help myself lol.

TW for drunkness/alcohol and emetophobia (they go a bit too hard and pay the price for it lol)

---

"What's that face for?" Stede chuckles. "Olu, are you worried about us?"

"You, yes," Olu scoffs. "With respect, the last time you went into Spanish Jackie's-"

"Things are different now! Ed said he wrote her ages ago that we'd be in the next time we got close to the Republic, and-"

"Right, you told us all about that, but that doesn't change the fact that if she has a chance to kill you, she will. Just because."

"Just because? Seems a poor reason to kill someone," Stede's nose wrinkles. "Well, then I will win her affections with this visit, and she'll never want to kill me again!"

Olu nods. "So, I told Izzy if shit goes down that we'll be ready to leave at a moment's notice. Everyone is on board with that, and they don't mind hanging close to the ship for it."

"You worry too much!" Stede pats his shoulder and gestures to his outfit. "Good? Piratey and sexy, yeah?"

"For a plain black shirt and tr-" Olu pauses. "That's Izzy's shirt. If you're wearing that, what is he-"

"We're done!" Ed makes his way out of the secret passageway, Izzy behind him. "Olu, good! Give us all a once-over before we head out for date night, make sure we look-"

"Sexy, yeah," Olu says. "Are you just going out with Izzy's vest as your top?"

"Why wouldn't I?" Ed motions to it. "Soft and comfy and worn in, and I get to show off a little. And Izzy-"

He moves aside and gently pushes Izzy forward. "As you can see, has borrowed from both of us."

The trousers are clearly Stede's (black silk and tight), the shirt one of Ed's (a black crop top), but everything else is still Izzy's, including the cravat and ring that hasn't been loosened even an inch.

"If I saw you guys in a tavern-" Olu starts, only to turn at the room door flying open.

"He'd fuck you all in a heartbeat," Jim finishes. "Come on, I need help convincing Buttons and the Swede not to host a knife catching contest."

"Did you offer to be in said contest?" Olu smiles.

"That's assistant first mate to crew confidentiality," Jim replies. "If you aren't gonna stop us, then Roach at least wants another pair of hands ready for stitching people up."

"We'll be fine," Olu says. "No one is going to be too horribly stabbed on my watch."

"My ear!" is the shout from outside that sends Olu and Jim hurrying off, and leaves the three of them to head ashore.

--

"Do you think Jim meant that?" Stede asks. "Not that I fancy Olu like that, would be inappropriate in the workplace-"

"He'd have to wait his turn anyway," Ed interrupts. "You look so good. Izzy's shirt, my extra trousers, which you should really wear more often-"

"They're so much work to get on! Otherwise, I might consider it," Stede sighs. "Oh no."

"Jackie," Izzy strides towards the door of the tavern. "You are not in quarantine. This lie might have worked on Jack, but that's only because he doesn't care where he drinks in the end."

Her head pops out as the door opens. "Would you shut up?! Ed and Stede will hear y-oh."

She slips all the way outside with a grimace. "Ed, Stede, hey! So, as you can see, y'all are gonna have to go elsewhere tonight-"

"Is this because of me and Jack?" Ed asks. "Because we were young, and stupid-"

"It was three years ago," Jackie interjects.

"I've learned a lot in those three years, and Jack is dead! We've all grown as people."

"If I let you in," Jackie sighs deeply. "And that is an if, you promise that fucker is under your control at all times. Or I'll cut off more than his nose."

Stede scoffs loudly. "Are you referring to me?"

"Sure as fuck ain't referring to Izzy," she says. "Worst he does is fall asleep after a few drinks."

"Come on," Izzy mutters.

"You do! It's okay, not a bad thing!"

"Is it just wine that does it? He claims it's just wine," Stede says.

"Fuck no, it's everything. Cute too, he lays his lil head down by his cup, gets all snuggly," Jackie giggles. "Shit is adorable."

"Adorable," Izzy grumbles. "Are we allowed in or not?"

"He needs the sleep, grumpy little fucker," Jackie opens the door and motions them in. "Hurry up before I change my mind."

They pile into a fairly empty tavern; the quarantine signs had been up long enough to keep most people away, apparently.

"Shots?" Ed asks.

"Already?" Izzy mutters, but he takes the offered tray of them to a table as soon as Jackie's latest barkeep hands it over.

"Can I ask what exactly happened with Jack here?" Stede murmurs as they settle into their seats at the corner table. "Or do I not want to know?"

"You've seen Jack drunk," Ed starts.

"Who hasn't," Izzy snorts under his breath.

"Iz!"

"He's right," Stede says. "But anyway."

"Anyway, he can get a bit wild, and he sort of got offended when no one would dance with him-"

"Important to know, there wasn't a band in for the night," Izzy interrupts. "There was nothing to dance to except his own version of shanties he barely remembered."

"You could have sang," Ed says. "He did ask you if you would."

"You sing?" Stede's eyes light up, and Izzy downs a shot.

"Yes. I'm not doing so here tonight, and that's that."

"So Jack got up and started dancing alone," Ed continues. "And when no one would join in he got... well..."

"He cost us the biggest sum of money I've ever spent in bribes to make something go away," Izzy scoffs. "Literally, everything we had on us and a few of the extra rings we wore that night. And I'm sure Jackie was still in the red with all the damage he did. Somehow didn't break the nose jar though."

"Because he thought it was haunted," Ed supplies before down a shot himself. "Why, I'll never know."

"Might be all the noses and the presumption that they're likely dead if they lost their nose," Stede notes. "Not that I think the soul resides in the nose or anything."

"Maybe it's in the liver," Ed giggles, and they burst out into rapidly softened laughter at Jackie's glare.

"See?" Stede grins. "She's worrying for nothing. We'll have a nice couple of hours here, drink until we're stumbling, then go back home."

--

"She's got the stomach for it," Stede's drink sloshes over the rim of his glass. "But Doug doesn't. He's very nice, don't get me wrong. Pretty eyes. But he could never be a pirate."

"Okay, okay, okay," Izzy says. "But I didn't think you could hack it either, and you've surprised me. Who could say that Doug couldn't do the same?"

"Who would watch the children then?" Stede protests. "They can't be alone yet, not old enough..."

"I could watch them," Ed says. "They sound like good kids."

"Alma once spent a day setting the drapes on fire to see what would happen," Stede sighs. "We only found out after the fifteenth one, because she couldn't put that one out on her own."

"Right, she's your kid, we know that already," Izzy chuckles.

"I don't like setting things on fire!"

"Dickfuck, yes you do!" Ed laughs. "You set stuff on fire all the time! The party alone, you set on fire so many guys!"

"Technically!" Stede protests. "Hm. There was the island after that. And the last four ships we raided... it's just so pretty! All the colours and the warmth of it..."

"Does the little one set fires yet?" Izzy asks.

"Louis? No, no...he..." Stede frowns. "He doesn't do much of anything yet. Follows his sister around and joins in whatever mischief she's doing. Though, it's been a bit now...he probably does have actual hobbies now, doesn't he?"

"I shouldn't have asked," Izzy pats Stede's back. "You're drunk enough to be weepy."

"You are," Stede sniffles. "Oh, they're better off without me. Good for them. Hopefully they won't burn the house down."

"A toast to not burning down houses!" Ed cheers, and the whole, now much more full, tavern raises glasses with them.

"I hope we didn't just jinx them," Stede mumbles.

"Doug may not be a pirate, but surely he can keep children from setting fires," Izzy sighs. "Are his eyes really that pretty?"

"It's insane," Ed interjects. "He's described them to me, and I'm mad I'll never look the man in the eyes myself, and I hate eye contact most of the time."

"Tell me," Izzy grins, and Stede slides onto his lap as he goes into his lecture about Doug's eyes.

--

"Jackie," Stede mumbles. "I love you."

"I should have told Olu to come with and drag you guys back," Jackie pats Stede's back, and gently but forcefully ends their hug. "Be safe getting back, alright? I won't be happy if I find out you dumbasses drowned trying to get to the ship."

"We're fine," Izzy says from his seat on the cobblestones. "Just a bit spinny, all of it."

"All of what?" Ed asks.

"Yeah."

"Oh god," Jackie sighs as she shuts the tavern door, and they struggle out into the night.

"I will sing for you sometime," Izzy nudges Stede as they huddle together. "If you'd like."

"I would love! Can I choose the song? Wait, no, I bet you have something you know by heart; I want to hear that!"

"Pretty man with a pretty voice," Ed coos. "Stede, pass this kiss to him, hm?"

He kisses Stede's cheek, and Stede dutifully kisses Izzy's in turn.

"What was Olu even worrying about," Stede says as he leans on Ed. "We're so good."

"So good," Ed agrees. "Can you move your feet before I vomit on them?"

He does, but only just in time.

"I told you both to eat more," Izzy sighs and switches sides, putting Ed in between himself and Stede as they help him along. "No one ever listens to me."

"Maybe if you sang it?" Ed suggests as he wipes off his mouth. "No singing tomorrow though. I can already feel the headache."

"No, tomorrow we nap and Roach will bring us water and something gentle to eat," Stede says happily. "I bet he's already got water waiting in our room."

Izzy nods. "Speaking of, we're at, the ladder is here."

He points upwards, only to gag. "Don't look up. Too much spinning, up."

"Do you maybe have vertigo?" Stede suggests as he gently pushes Ed up the ladder. "Oh, the water is deep here, hm? Nearly knocked me down. But really, based on everything I've heard, it's not anything wrong with you, with the spewing and all-"

As if on cue, Izzy vomits into the water.

"Right, that, like yes, you're drunk but also dizzy, so maybe-"

"Please get up the ladder before we drown, love," Izzy sighs.

"You've done it with that; you know I can't say no when you use pet names on me," Stede grins. "Can you help me?"

They manage to drag each other up, with Olu and Roach helping them the rest of the way with hands held out.

"You three had fun," Roach teases. "Who's gonna feel horrible tomorrow?"

"Yeah," Ed mumbles, leaning against the mast. "What time is it anyway?"

"Later than you said you'd be back by," Olu replies. "Hours later. The sun's due to be up soon, let's get you into your quarters before that happens."

"Like a vampire, but because of booze," Stede says, in the tone of someone giving an academic lecture.

"Sure," Roach motions them towards their quarters. "We're not carrying any of you, so-"

"But Izzy's dizzy," Stede says pathetically.

"I'm fine," Izzy stands from the deck, only to go pale and immediately flop back down.

"His crush on you is only gonna get worse," Ed grins as Roach helps Izzy up, letting him lean against him. "Remember Iz, Stede and I don't mind sharing now and again."

"Ignore him; he's drunk," Izzy protests, but his eyes linger on Roach's lips.

"So are you," Roach chuckles as they make their way finally into the room. "Bed, water, clean clothes for now, and tomorrow we can talk about who is sharing who with who as much as you want."

"Your eyes are even prettier than Doug's," Izzy mumbles softly.

"Is that a good thing?" Roach asks.

"It's a compliment you can't even imagine," Stede sighs and flops onto the bed. "Are there-"

"Buckets, yes," Olu interjects. "And water, and some hardtack, and extra blankets because we guessed Ed might want-"

"Blanket fort!" Ed stumbles forward, reaching for the nearest one. "We'll build and sleep in one tonight. Give me five minutes."

"I'll give you ten," Olu shakes his head. "We'll leave you three to it, and check on you in a bit, yeah?"

"Thank you for watching the ship and everyone, Olu," Stede replies. "You're the Doug of our ship: responsible and gorgeous."

"Thought you didn't fancy him like that?" Ed teases.

"I can appreciate and look without wanting to get in Jim's way," Stede huffs. "I don't think I can sit up again."

Olu bites back a giggle. "You're welcome, and thank you? I think. Please get some sleep."

His and Roach's footsteps trail out, the door gently shutting behind them.

"Ed, shall I help with the fort?" Izzy mutters, leaning against the wall where Roach left him.

But Ed is silent, snuggling on the floor with the blanket he'd grabbed, already lightly dozing.

"Stede," Izzy stumbles his way to the bed. "May I lay with you?"

"You can even be sick on me if you must," Stede pats his chest. "I'd rather you not, of course, but if you can't help it-"

They both grunt as Izzy drops onto the bed.

"Will Ed tell us when the fort is done?" Stede yawns.

Izzy nods, and snuggles up next to him. "Might be a while."

"Good things are worth being patient for. Like this."

"Like what?"

"Like us, the three of us, together," Stede continues. "And blanket forts."

Izzy nods again, already half asleep.

"Morning," Ed sighs, suddenly up again, only to crash down on Stede's free side. "I'll finish it in the morning."

"It's morning now," Stede mumbles, but he doesn't protest when Ed nuzzles against him, and there's no thought of wanting to move from where they are.

The eventual blanket fort, he decides in his last conscious moment, will be where they recover later, when they can stay awake long enough to stand.

[musicalrecs]

Today's shameless promotion is for a show you likely haven't heard of: The Musical of Musicals: The Musical!

This show is actually five shows in one, each using the same basic storyline but in the style of a different composer/lyricist. The introduction to the show spells this out:

For those of you disinclined to watch a minute-long clip or read the handy Wikipedia link above, allow me to summarize:

Young woman: I can't pay the rent! Villain dude: You must pay the rent! (Interlude in which older woman gives advice) Hero dude: I'll pay the rent!

This basic story is then played out five times, each in the style of a different composer/lyricist:

Corn! - Rodgers & Hammerstein A Little Complex - Sondheim Dear Abby - Jerry Herman Aspects of Junita - Andrew Lloyd Webber Speakeasy - Kander & Ebb

If you recognize at least a couple of those names and enjoy spotting references, you'll have a good time.

Can I watch it online? Much to my shock, yes! There was a benefit version made just a couple years ago, to raise funds for York Theater after a water-main break (plus the whole covid thing happening).

Through the "magic of green screen" it stars a truly ridiculous number of people you very likely have heard of, giving perfectly adequate performances (green screen...). The opening is one of those long, eye-rolling bits where people who aren't actors do their best to tell jokes/sing and you're like "is the real show starting soon?" but hey, it's Youtube and a benefit production, you can just quietly skip all that.

The best sequence in the above is probably the Kander & Ebb parody, which features Chita Rivera, Ethan Slater, Colleen Ballinger, Randy Rainbow, Jackie Hoffman, and personal favorite of mine Christine Pedi, but results will vary wildly by production and your personal musical tastes.

In addition, more than one local production has been filmed and put online, so you've absolutely got viewing options that were unimaginable to me a couple decades ago. (I'm old.) (On Tumblr, anyway.) In fact, I actually prefer the local productions, as this is the kind of show that really benefits from the unpretentiousness of a small auditorium, a bake sale at intermission, and names you recognize in the program because you went to high school together. (See also: You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown)

So, if you're the kind of person who thought "A Musical!" from Something Rotten was peak theater, give The Musical of Musicals: The Musical! a try. And then, consider joining your local tenants' union and work to prevent unreasonable rent increases.

[moderndaycirce]

Introducing Virginia Fox!

Lifepath: Corpo

Nicknames: V (Post Arasaka), Princess (Jackie ONLY and she MEANS IT when she says that), Sweetheart (Johnny, started patronising, moved into a genuine nickname)

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Bi/Pansexual

Date of Birth: October 12th 2046 (31 during 2077)

Notable Relationships: Jackie (Best friends), Panam (Friends), Judy (Ex in all ending situations as Virginia can't stop herself from returning to NC), Goro (Casually dated post The Star ending, Friends post The Devil ending, Enemies post any other ending), River (Ex, all endings), Johnny (Together, all endings), Kerry (Bros who share Johnny)

Bio: The only child of two high ranking Arasaka corpos, Virginia Fox was raised from birth knowing that eventually she would have a position at Arasaka when she grew up. Groomed in a variety of skills from a young age, as a teenager her aptitude for intelligence work caught the eye of the counter intelligence unit, leading to them recruiting her out of Arasaka Academy at 16 and putting her in a fast track training program to start her with the company at 18 once she was legally an adult. She took on her first corporate assassination a month after she turned 18. Counter to the corpo side of her, a young Virginia also spent a lot of her time playing piano, something she enjoyed greatly until she had to quit at 16 when she was recruited. She doesn't play again until after Mikoshi, at Kerry's urging to show him why she knew so much about his fancy piano in his mansion. When she was 20 years old, she was approached by her superiors for what they told her was a promotion. Arasaka paid for full body biosculpting and turned her into an undercover agent designed to target the skeezy corpos who spent their money and time at places like Clouds. Her role was to seduce and kill whoever they pointed her at, in a kind of Black Widow situation. She did that until she was 25. A few weeks after recovering from the biosculpting surgery she turned 21 and allowed her coworkers to take her to a random bar in Heywood that she knew was populated with Valentinos. Figuring she had to keep her coworkers on her side due to how much attention Arasaka had been paying to her with this promotion, she went along with them, but wasn't happy about it. Eventually, her coworkers got so drunk they picked a fight with Valentinos at the same time a tall, cheerful Valentino had been dared to come get her away from the group, his friends thinking she was a corpo joytoy. When she clarified that she was a corpo too, he introduced himself as Jackie, shortening her name to V when she introduced herself to him.

They were fast friends, like the brother she'd never had- and she spent much of her time when not working with him and his gang friends. Their favourite tradition being taking Jackie's old truck out to the Badlands after one of them had a bad day and smoking weed under the stars. She coached him through the many, MANY loves of his life and he began to show her a life outside of the corpo bubble, introducing her to some of the parts of Night City that only a Street Kid would know. Jackie also introduced her to Padre, who spent several years offering her a job as a merc. Virginia, who was becoming increasingly dissatisfied with her job considered taking him up on it, but her contract was ironclad. At the same time, Jackie also introduced her to Vik when he had to be collected from the ripper's clinic after a shoot out gone wrong where Virginia had to stash him in her apartment so his mother didn't find out what he'd done. It was at that point that Jackie left the Valentinos, realising that Solo work might not be safer, but at least he might make more money out of being shot at. (tw: SA) When Virginia turned 25, a hit job went badly when the target was more violent than she was expecting, pulling out chunks of her hair and forcing her to perform oral sex on him before telling her he knew what she was and trying to strangle her to death. After she somehow killed the target, she took her contract to Padre who promised to secretly get it to a lawyer to see if she could get out. Arasaka noticed this, and steered her in a different direction, removing her from the now dubbed "Aphrodite Program" and framing it as another promotion that had her doing counter intelligence from further away. They also put a PR Strategist named Celia in her path, who Virginia fell hard and fast for. Padre's lawyer couldn't find a loophole for escape, but now her work was less dangerous and she was in love, she forgot that she'd even wanted to leave.

For the next few years, Virginia dated Celia who hated Jackie and her other Valentino friends with a passion. She also slowly began taking combat stims and synth coke, now surrounded by people taking the stuff on a daily basis, and didn't notice when it became part of her daily routine. Without her knowledge, during a routine check up, Arasaka installed regulators which upped her tolerance to the drugs, meaning she began taking even more. Three years into her relationship with Celia, they agreed to get married and petitioned the company for permission. Arasaka denied, claiming they had better matches for them both. Virginia refused, Celia accepted. At this point, any good feelings Virginia had toward Arasaka broke completely, and she threw herself into her work to keep her mind from the heartbreak. Her first act after the break up was to jump on a plane to Japan for an international conference where she grabbed the first person she was slightly attracted to and made him get on his knees in the bathroom to get her off. Thus, started V's slut era. For the next two years, V did her job without fuss but began secretly feeding information to Padre, no longer caring if she was caught. Her drug use spiralled out of control when she wasn't around Jackie, so he had no idea how bad things had gotten. This was her party era, where Jackie had enough of a steady income from merc work and the happiness of his new relationship with Misty to indulge her in her party mood, only putting his foot down when she started breaking his friend's hearts for fun. Now 30 and working under Jenkins, V found herself in Texas while following a journalist nomad when she was called back to Night City due to a Cyberpsycho attack on the tower. Having lost a grandfather in Johnny's bombing she took it seriously, returning to be redeployed a week later to the job that would lead to her being fired.

Personality: Virginia is smart and driven, which doesn't always work in her favour. She enjoys climbing ranks and yearns for power, but her constant need to be actively doing something means that she hates stagnating or stillness. This also means that she deals with her emotions in ways that aren't always the healthiest, leading her into jumping in the middle of situations she would normally know better than to leap into without thinking.

Friendships (or what I have expanded so far):

Kerry: V and Kerry are fast friends, two lonely people in Night City drawn to each other in a way that Johnny describes as "annoying" (but he's mainly upset that his best friend seems to enjoy V's company more than he ever enjoyed his). The moment that cemented their friendship was when Kerry asked to speak to her during the release of his song with Us Cracks, where V leaned in to kiss him on the cheek and he rejected her. V was confused by this as she wasn't trying to hook up with him, before asking him "Is the only time someone touches you when they're trying to fuck you?". Kerry had looked so upset at that realisation that they'd hugged each other and that was that. They text every day about the most random, mundane shit, even when Virginia goes to Phoenix after Mikoshi. She has an open ticket to any of his concerts and he keeps pestering her to secretly be on one of his new album tracks. When Johnny returns, their friendship becomes a little strained as Kerry is torn with his feelings. His old love for Johnny and his jealousy that V seemingly gets the Johnny that he never got (he later realises that V did get that Johnny, it was just all in her head). Eventually V gets annoyed with the way Johnny and Kerry can't get their shit together so she orchestrates a threesome at a party, reasoning that they might actually have some post-nut clarity and talk to each other. It works, and V and Kerry eventually come to a "shared custody" agreement of Johnny, who is more than happy to have two people's attention on him.

[ruminativerabbi]

Profiles in Courage

In anticipation of the celebration this week of the 248th anniversary our nation’s independence, I undertook to re-read President John Kennedy’s Pulitzer-Prize-winning 1956 bestseller, Profiles in Courage, a book I first encountered when it was assigned to me by Mrs. Gore in my eleventh-grade American history class. If I remember correctly, it impressed me then. But it astounded me now, and in several different ways. Of course, I am more than aware of the widespread belief that the book was substantially written by Theodore Sorensen, at the time a Kennedy speechwriter with a strong interest in American history, and that a good deal of the research that went into the book was undertaken by Jules Davids, a professor of diplomatic history at Georgetown, where he had among his students the young Jackie Kennedy, then still Jacqueline Bouvier. (Sorensen’s remark that he wasn’t the book’s author, merely the guy who wrote “the first draft of most of the book’s chapters” says more than enough.) Of course, I was unaware of any of this when I was in Mrs. Gore’s class and took the book to be the work of our martyred thirty-fifth president, whose memory we all revered and whom we all believed would have gone on to do truly great things if he had lived to the end of a second term in the White House. For better or worse, I will refer here to John Kennedy as the book’s author.

The book itself consists of a series of essays, eight in total, describing acts of moral heroism undertaken at various moment’s in our nation’s history by sitting senators. Most of the senators in question served in the Senate in the decades leading up to the Civil War or in the ones that followed; all are depicted as men who, rather than following the advice of their party or even the wishes of their constituents, chose instead to do what they perceived to be the right thing regardless of the consequences of their actions. These senators, in Kennedy’s opinion, were therefore heroes: men who chose to remain true to their own ideals and who were prepared to pay a big price for doing so.

That notion, of course, was and remains controversial: is the job of elected officials to do what they personally believe to be right or to represent their constituents vigorously and to vote in accordance with the wishes of the people who put them in office specifically to represent them in the Congress? It’s a good question! And it is telling, at least to me, that that specific issue is not debated or even raised really in the pages of the book: for the author, it goes without saying that the job of public officials is always to act in accordance with their own moral code and so to fulfill the “real” reasons anyone is elected to office in the first place: to do good, to promote virtue, to act in the best interests of the people, and to lead the nation forward to (or at least towards) the fulfillment of its national destiny. No more than that, but also no less!

What I liked so much about the book the first time ‘round (i.e., back in eleventh grade), I can’t quite recall. But what struck me this time was how complicated it is to say that politicians who act in accordance with their own values and ideals are always behaving in a praiseworthy manner—and that the corollary, that it is always base and unworthy for politicians to bow to public opinion, including the public opinion of their own constituents, is also true.

A good example would be the case of Senator Robert A. Taft, the son of the twenty-seventh president of the United States and the senator from Ohio from 1939 through 1953. What JFK particularly admired in Taft was his willingness to face nation-wide opprobrium for publicly opposing the Nuremberg Trials of some of the worst Nazi war criminals, to which Taft sneeringly referred as victor’s justice under ex post facto laws. This latter idea—that no one may be tried, let alone executed, for breaking laws that were only enacted after the deed under consideration was done—is a pillar of Western justice. But there was no one in the nation—except for Senator Taft, it seems—who was willing to apply that to the Nazis being tried in Nuremberg, whose crimes against humanity were—at least for most—so beyond the pale of “normal” criminality that the regular rules could not reasonably apply to them. Nor did Taft mince his words on the topic, repeatedly referencing the trials as being far more about vengeance than justice. This could not possibly have been a less popular opinion and he was publicly lambasted both by Republicans and Democrats for daring suggest that there was something intrinsically illegal afoot in Nuremberg and for going so far as to characterize Nuremberg as “a miscarriage of justice that the American people would long regret.” (To read the New York Times article of October 6, 1946 recording the senator’s words, click here.) It is widely believed that this principled opposition to the Nuremberg Trials is what cost Taft the Republican nomination for President in 1952.

JFK admires Taft immensely for knowing what he believed to be right and for repeatedly paying gigantic prices for being true to his own self. (His pre-Pearl-Harbor opposition to US involvement in World War II is widely thought to have cost him the Republican nomination in 1940, which he also didn’t get in 1948 because—or at least probably because—of his isolationist positioning.) I felt myself swept along by Kennedy’s rhetoric too: I couldn’t have agreed with Robert Taft less on most issues, including—possibly most of all—the legitimacy of Nuremberg. And yet I was struck by the portrait of a man with the courage of his convictions, of a man who would simply not lie about how he felt for his own gain.

The other portraits in the book are equally stirring, most of all the portraits of Edmund G. Ross, the senator from Kansas who broke with his party and the large majority of his constituency to vote to acquit at the impeachment trial in the Senate of President Andrew Johnson, and of Lucius Lamar, senator from Mississippi, who alienated huge numbers of his constituents by attempting to re-integrate the South into the Union and by supporting Black suffrage. At this juncture in history, it would probably be a good thing for all Americans to review Kennedy’s book—including those of us who last read it as teenagers. The chapters are a bit uneven (and some presume a familiarity with American history that will not correspond to what most readers will bring along to their encounter with the book), but the book’s basic argument—that our nation has been blessed over the centuries to have among its leaders people whose devotion to their own ideals and principles was ironclad and unshakeable—is something American would do well to consider and reconsider as we wrap up the first quarter of this century and move on into the second.

We have evolved a system in which we esteem above all else flexibility of opinion and elasticity of conviction. We hail as our greats individuals who get things done, who are effective and energetic, who know how to compromise. And we specifically do not admire people who refuse to go along with the majority, who insist on sticking to their opinions no matter what the consequences, who don’t mind being widely reviled if such is the price for being true their personal convictions. Indeed, the notion itself that the job of senators and members of the House is to embody their own virtues rather than invariably to act in accordance with the opinions of their constituents is probably the opposite of what most people think. And that is what makes President Kennedy’s book so challenging and so interesting—because, in the end, the book is a provocative argument that democracy needs leaders with vision and virtue, not ones who see their job as simply doing what they are told by the voters. In turn, this question leads to others. With whom should the ultimate power rest in a democracy—with the people (who are, after all, the demos in democracy) or with its leaders, chose precisely because of their vision and personal philosophy? How should history judge those who claim to believe in democracy but who—like JFK, apparently—ultimately hail as heroes elected officials who refuse to obey the wishes of the people who put them office? What does it even mean to lead a nation, for that matter: to do as the people demand or to inspire them to want what you feel is in their own best interests? Is that paternalism or leadership? Does hoi polloi get the final vote? Or is putting that kind of power in the hands of the masses precisely what leads to Nazism and Maoism? These are the questions that Profiles in Courage awakened in me as we approach the nation’s semiquincentennial in just two years. Are our leaders supposed to lead or be led? Do the people have the final word? Or is their job to put in place leaders whose sense of allegiance to their own virtues and values will lead the nation forward to its destiny? These are all excellent questions…and one more timely than the next!

[star-kissed583]

The magnificent man (chap. 7)

Single dad Jackie AU

Jackie needs to find a babysitter soon, but not just anyone, someone who can take care of the kids and are willing to help.

<<| 1 |>>><<| 2 |>><<| 3 |>><<| 4 |><<| 5 |>>| 6 |><

Jackie let out a deep sigh as he scrolled through the different bio's of babysitters once more. He sat on the couch beside Chase and Robbie-all while the other kids were on the floor watching a movie.

Jackie huffed, continuing to scroll through as he stares at the different informations, picking out the few that seemed reliable.

Chase's little chirps and the light tapping of fingers on the fabric of the couch could be heard-and it was distracting Jackie a bit while he tried reading. Yet, he didn't mention anything as he gets up,

"I'll be back boys, I need to make some quick calls"

Jackie walked off to the kitchen with his computer and phone-making sure to still have to kid's in his sight. He looks at his list of babysitters-hoping to find one that had a reasonable price and willing to care for 5 kids with disabilities.

————————•——

The first call was a major bust.

The woman on the other end seemed to only be interested in knowing about Jackie and that was it. She instantly backed up when Jackie told her what disabilities the boys had.

It was almost the same situation for his 2nd, 3rd, up to his 5th call.

Jackie groans while covering his face. He glanced at the kids, frowning softly, 'I knew it was gonna be difficult...but...it's okay-I got this! One more call and then I can keep looking...'

"God please be the one Marvin..."

//////////////////////////////

"Hello! This is Marvin Manus speaking, how may I help you?"

"Uh hey, my name is Jackie and I saw your post about possibly accepting jobs for babysitting young kids..."

The man in the other side, Marvin, had a smooth as honey voice. He smiles on the other end, humming softly as he cooked himself some food.

"That is what I do sir. How many kids would it be?"

"...5 boys...they each have some sort of disabilities or stuff..." Jackie's nervous tone was heard plain as day.

Marvin rose a brow at that, growing more curious on what Jackie was talking about. He hums, turning down the temperature of the stove as he grabs a pen and paper, "Well...would you mind telling me what they have-to see if I can help out babysit or not"

Jackie felt a bit hopeful hearing that, hoping not to scare Marvin away, "Uh...we got three very young ones and two older kids...um, one of the older kids has amputated leg and arm," Jackie decided to start off with which wouldn't scare the babysitter away immediately.

Marvin hums, writing it down, "Alright not too bad-what about the other 4?"

"One of the young ones is mute and blind...and the other has Fatal Alcohol Syndrome...and then the blind one has a twin that has epilepsy while the other older kid has Tourette's syndrome"

The silence on the other end made Jackie more nervous. He rubs the back of his neck as he sighs, "Look...I know it's a lot...I'll even pay you more than what you're asking for. But I really need help. At least please consider if you can"

Jackie anticipated for a response- or liking the silence on the other line-only able to hear a soft tapping of a pen.

A gentle sigh suddenly came out from the other side, "I have some experiences with some of those conditions...I can try one day and see how it goes. Would you need frequent babysitting or is this an occasional thing?"

Marvin didn't know whether this was a good idea or not-but hearing how desperate the guy sounded and how caring he was towards the kids-it seemed to pull him in for some reason.

Jackie brighten a bit at that, "Um...I may need it frequently...BUT! We can try one day and see how it goes for you and see if you'd like-"

Marvin chuckles, "yeah we'll have to see. What day do you need?"

"Two days!"

"Alright sir, we'll exchange information and then I'll see you and your kids in two days"

As soon as Jackie hung up, he was smiling happily. He felt a sense of relief and joy to know he has probably found a babysitter.

"JAC-EGGS-JACKIE!!"

His smile instantly dropped as soon as he heard Chase yell. Jackie set his things down and rushed over to the living room.

Jamie was crying with a scraped knee in the middle of the living room. He was hugging his knees to his chest-crying what would be out loud if it weren't for the fact no sound was coming out of him except small little gasps.

"He fall vhen go fast to ink crayons" Henrik tried explaining as he looked worried.

Jackie rushed over, setting a gentle hand on Jay's knee to inspect it-only for Jay to suddenly flinch away from him. Jackie frowns, "It's okay. It's just me-Jackie. I just wanna help"

Jay heard the voice of the big man. He whimpers, unsure if he was in trouble again. He curled up more, not knowing where he was. A hand feeling around for Anthony.

'Where baba...I wan' baba!' He thinks as he cried.

Anthony was fast asleep on the couch, having not heard what happened. He hadn't really slept so much apparently-so Jackie has noticed how he'd often either sleep in or sleep at random points of the day.

Jackie frowns as he moves to sit beside Jay. He gently taps the floor beside him before placing a soft hand over Jay's hand, "it's okay...I'm only here to help...your brother is asleep-will you let me help you make the owies go away Jamie?"

Jackie had quickly learned JJ didn't like hearing his first name. So he knew to use nicknames only, making it his mission to let Jay know he's safe now.

Jay slowly nodded, uncurling himself from his little ball he's made. Jackie smiles as he looks at the scraped knee, "Imma pick you up and we're gonna go to the bathroom so I can care for your owie" he spoke as he carefully picked Jay up.

Jackie glanced at the others in the room, "I'll be back boys. If Anthony wakes up, let him know I'm with Jamie" he began to walk to the bathroom, gently bouncing Jay as the little boy rubbed his eyes.

Jay let himself be carried off, sniffling from the throbbing pain he felt on his knee. Suddenly he felt himself be set down on a counter, hearing Jackie humming softly as the man gathered what was needed for his knee.

Jay gently put his sleeve of his shirt in his mouth while he waited. Feeling around with his free hand the area. He could feel the smooth counter top, the dip of the counter's edge and where the sink starts.

Outta no where a hand rested on his leg, making Jay flinch and let out a small whimper. Jackie smiles softly as he grabbed a wet cloth, "Imma clean your knee up...it may hurt a little though" he warned before gently patting the wound.

Even the slightest touch caused a sudden pain through Jay. He burst into more tears, backing up a little as best as he could as he shook his head. Jackie was gently holding Jay's leg as he frowns, "I know honey. I know it hurts...almost done"

Jay kept squirming, his hands patting and hitting the counter as a way to try and express his distress.

Soon enough a gentle blow was on his knee, before feeling a bandaid get put on. Jackie rubs his leg a bit as he runs a hand through Jay's hair, "there you go, it's over Jamie...you were so strong for me."

Jackie picked the little boy up and set him down on the ground, holding his hand as they walked out of the bathroom. Jay waddled as he rubs his eyes, smiling a bit. Jackie got the boy a piece of cookie before leading him back to the living room.

All the others were still scattered around doing their own thing. Jay slowly let go of Jackie's hand and went to do his own thing again. Jackie watched the young twin go draw once again-what the boy probably thought was a continuation of his drawing-but it was just a ton of scribbles on top of one another.

Jackie sighs, making sure everyone was alright, seeing Anthony slowly wake up and go sleepily join his brother. Jackie grabbed a pencil and a paper, 'may as well write out some important notes for the babysitter...' he thought-going to the coffee table to write it out while keeping an eye on the kids.

[scentedchildnacho]

Asian pear.......slowly its getting better......I would at least keep reinforcing that cults may not buy my day pads for me tamper with its safety seal and distribute in controlling creepy ways.....and I have learned the tea aisle and consistently attempted to create my coffee preferences.....so gnp ..

Something won't pay for its prostitute and it kept stealing my day pads to give to it's victims

I do not have to support people you dicked and now do not have pleasant vaginal symptoms

Im sorry but LGBT is correct heteronormative sex practice does have to be like royal it's not easily self afforded as addictive and a lot

Subjective we are all voters and have queen based soveriegnty hygiene standards and those people have foul foul foul odour needs to be selected for football so Aaron Hernandez....they need to odour their competition for jobs or jobs already did what it was expected to created the robotic to replace it so their lives could become green

Waymo....you dont have to be a driver it's not enjoyed to train populations to slowly accept jail...captivity

Jackie Onassis Kennedy as a white first lady was like what her racial features promised....she was surprisingly gifted with intelligence and compassion for a drunks history

It was actually Jackie forgiven by confederate klans for being what would bring women fertility compassion about addiction and reproduction

That's me about white chicks sometimes their husbands no....but they in the end finally bringing financial justice to their families and dying of old age in lifestyles of the rich and famous

Feed the pigeons and racoons ra ku.....even the ku if it's the ku...wonder needs Jackie trains people to give them their wonder bread

I believe it there were baby boomers and populations were segregated and more related then realized after nuclear Holocaust so all white people if not fed and clothed have genetic predispositions to kill and even eat human prey

I can't wait till pacific beach extreme sport starts going to get fat....

That's like one of my favorite things about life is how cute baby fat legs are....so cute....and I can't wait till everyone in California stops removing southernism from themselves and they finally sit around on porches fat and pleased at nothing

The hare krishnas gave me a gita which writes dont take things in southern California personnally there is something very sacred about its location and so the experience is more empathy for a battle a lot maybe wasnt internal for me

But that's me about jobs although I appreciate that they need to protect themselves from car tel terrorism.....they indiscriminately create enemies of most of their consumption and that's why I still wont do it no matter Guantanamo tactic used....

Acadianna emigration about gaining rights and property and influence here were actually strategists......not bloody territory tribal for bloody territory

So maybe most people in south cal can say they were attacked but if you ask me they are Stanford's and try to deprivationally torture me till I forcibly make criminal decisions and I am not going to take part in anything

I really don't know who can but I think it's about Jeffrey Dahmer it's forcing criminals to protect themselves from things beyond abnormal psychology

Tucson studies just said about serial killers and prophetics that there are people who do these things and a lot of the homeless population is veterans and it's not my concern

The compass station........uhm I'm not concerned about its staff to me because they appear to have taken on problems that are too important for their capability but maybe they can take on those case loads

They start trying to work with the mothers and my black safe people assure me white isn't favored to executive fashion and lifestyle anymore so it's just don't get involved or I would have been to women's groups from young ages

The beach and Bay News reported arresting parents because babies looked like physical assault but quite frankly the constructive psychological conditions in San Diego could have caused sudden infant death syndrome

No one has actually punched me with their fist and I have deprivational bruises and scratches all over my body

Koreans are here so it's okay....sometimes bruising is a healing sign and I will learn to not freak out and hurt myself if stuff happens to me with more affluence

Men that will kill their own baby that's really really abnormal though pretty rare....

It is just very psychologically abusive in pacific beach till I look like physical assault

I mean maybe that baby has fentanyl in its body is the correct lawsuit but I think she was suppose to exonerate a baby daddy and could get really abused if he is insinuated in any way as too involved with a pregnancy problem

She said she is a veteran and sometimes their murders are about doing anything people want so

My science classes tell me conflicts in African indigenous dark peoples districts are not as easy and basic as racial zoning and differential expectations of achievement and not....

And they have police for their needs and I am like foreign....to it so

[ukrfeminism]

Young women need to save an average of £185,000 more during their working life typically to enjoy the same retirement income as men, according to a report.

Women currently aged in their 20s will have only saved around £250,000 on average by the time they retire, according to Scottish Widows

Men, who typically have higher earnings than women and are less likely to take significant time out of work to raise families, will have closer to £350,000 saved for their retirement on average.

But women are likely to need more than just this savings shortfall, as they tend to live longer than men, and some may spend longer periods needing care in later life, the report argued.

A 25-year-old man today will live to 86 based on current estimates, while a woman can expect to reach the age of 89, according to the Scottish Widows women and retirement report.

There are ways to help level the playing field - from enhancing maternity pensions to offering better parental leave and financial support for childcare - so that women are no longer financially penalised for raising a family

The £185,000 gap is made up of around £100,000 to bridge the savings gap, another £50,000 to cover longer life expectancy and £35,000 to pay for additional care needs.

Scottish Widows calculated that women would need to save roughly £210 extra per month from their mid-20s until they retire to bridge the £185,000 gap.

However, this calculation was based on several assumptions, including that a pension pot would show yearly real investment growth of 2% and that someone would start saving for their retirement aged 25 and retire at 68.

Jackie Leiper, managing director of workplace savings, Scottish Widows, said: “It’s well known that the gender pay gap has a damaging impact on women’s retirement prospects. But even if we close the saving gap, pension equality would still not be achieved. Women need to fund a longer retirement and shell out more on care costs.

“There are ways to help level the playing field – from enhancing maternity pensions to offering better parental leave and financial support for childcare – so that women are no longer financially penalised for raising a family. Of course, we must also tackle the larger structural issues in our society, like the gender pay gap.”

The report, which has been running annually since 2006, also found that the same proportion of men and women are now saving enough for a comfortable retirement (61%) for the first time on record. People were deemed to be saving adequately if the equivalent of at least 12% of their income was going into their retirement pot.

In 2007, 54% of men were deemed to be saving adequately versus 41% of women.

Ms Leiper added: “We need to build on this positive step forward and now focus on closing the remaining inequities that impact savings. Pension inequality is not just an issue for women to resolve, structural unfairness affects us all and needs the collective efforts of us all to resolve this persistent imbalance.”

The report used a range of figures for its modelling, including Office for National Statistics (ONS) earnings figures and a survey of more than 5,000 people about their retirement planning across Britain.

[blueskrugs]

Jump Then Fall | Jack Hughes

I am eternally soft for this kid, okay. this is not the original birthweek fic I had planned for him, but it is a bonus Swift Fic because I couldn't help myself. enjoy while I work on getting my shit together for the summer!

tagging: @marcoscandellas @stlbluesbrat21 @dembenchboys @poltoncarayko @robthomissed @letmeplaytheblues @troubatrain @ayohockeycheck @blackwidowrising @aria253264 @antoineroussel @starswin @glassdanse @ch-ristiane @majdoline @nazdaddy @hockey-more-like

length: 2k words

High school relationships never worked out. That’s what they always told you, at least, when you and Jack were young and in love. And they were right, sort of. You’d broken up not long after you’d both graduated, with Jack off to be drafted and you off to college. Except you’d stayed close, texting and talking on the phone often once Jack had headed off to New Jersey. He was one of your best friends, and you were thankful he was still in your life, but you weren’t sure you’d ever stop loving him, not really.

I like the way you sound in the morning We're on the phone and without a warning I realize your laugh is the best sound I have ever heard

Saturday mornings always meant long phone calls with Jack. You’d both wake up early and make coffee before spending most of the morning on the phone, talking about everything and nothing. Sometimes you wished more than anything that you could see his face, but you weren’t sure what would come spilling out of your mouth when you saw him.

One cold morning in December, you were pretty sure Jack had still been asleep when you called. His voice was slow and rough when he spoke, but you could still hear the smile in his voice.

When you heard him yawn, big enough his jaw cracked, you laughed. “Am I keeping you awake?” you asked.

Jack rushed to answer, “No, never.”

“Jack,” you warned.

Jack laughed. “We got in late last night, I’m just a little tired, I’m fine,” he told you.

“I can let you go back to sleep,” you said.

You heard Jack sit up on the other end of the line. “No way, absolutely not,” he said.

“We’re not even talking about anything important.” You’d mostly been stressing about the end of the semester.

“So? I like talking to you,” Jack argued.

You sighed. “You’re an idiot,” but it came out more fond than annoyed.

Somehow, that phone call lasted almost two more hours. Later, you wouldn’t remember what dumb thing you’d quipped that had made Jack burst out laughing, but you’d always remember the sound of that laugh. You’d wished you’d been able to record it, to have it to listen to on rough days, on days you missed Jack a little extra.

I hear the words but all I can think is We should be together

Jack was telling some story about his teammates. You were only half-listening, paying more attention to his face as he talked. It was late, and Quinn and Jack were home for Christmas. You and the three Hughes boys had taken over the basement for the night. Quinn and Luke were sprawled out on the couch opposite you, and you were buried under several blankets with your feet in Jack’s lap. He was using one hand to help illustrate his story, but the other was resting on your ankle, warm despite the chill outside, his thumb absently rubbing against your bare skin.

Quinn threw a balled up napkin at you, jolting you back to reality. “What’re you thinking about over there?” he asked.

“What?” You threw the napkin back at Quinn.

Luke chimed in, “Yeah, Jack’s not that funny, there’s no way you’re smiling at him.”

“Hey!” Jack protested. You dug your heel into his thigh, and he turned to grin at you.

You hadn’t even realized you were smiling. You always seemed to be smiling when you were around Jack, you couldn’t help it.

“Just missed you guys,” you said, grinning back at Jack.

Jack squeezed your ankle and went back to telling his story. You still weren’t listening.

Well, I like the way your hair falls in your face You got the keys to me I love each freckle on your face, oh

When Jack first started growing his hair out, you hated it.

“No, why,” you said the first time you saw him that summer. Luke laughed from somewhere behind you.

Jack ran a hand through his hair and smirked at you. “What do you mean?” he asked. “You love my hair.”

You tilted your head, pretending to consider. “I’ve changed my mind,” you said.

Jack squawked, outraged and offended. He slung an arm around your shoulder and pulled you in close as you giggled and tried to get away. “You’ll pay for that,” he told you. You dug your elbow into his ribs until he let go of you.

Later that night found the two of you left alone near the bonfire as the sun went down.

“Hey,” Jack said. You locked your phone and tilted your head back to look up at him upside down. “Do you really not like the hair?” he asked.

You snorted. “Would you cut it if I said I didn’t?” Jack shrugged, not quite meeting your eyes. You sat up and twisted to look at Jack properly. “You wouldn’t, oh my God.” It was hard to tell, but he might’ve been blushing in the fading light,

“Just tell me the truth,” he said.

You looked at Jack, really looked at him. He was tan, a new burst of freckles dusted across his nose. He’d shoved a hat on since you’d first seen him earlier in the day, but you could still see how his hair was just beginning to curl at the ends past the nape of his neck. Jack stared back at you, blue eyes dark.

“I guess I could get used to it,” you said.

Honestly, you were so gone for him, you were pretty sure you’d end up still liking him no matter what he looked like.

When people say things that bring you to your knees I'll catch you

Sometimes you didn’t know how Jack put up with it all. From losing streaks to being called a draft bust to people questioning whether he was capable of being a leader, there wasn’t a day that went by that he didn’t have to deal with some bullshit. You knew it wasn’t easy, but he rarely let it get to him. Rarely, but not never.

It didn’t surprise you when your phone rang after a rough game. You answered the FaceTime call without thinking about it, smiling softly when Jack’s face filled your screen. He looked tired, dark bags under his eyes and his hair hanging limply in his face.

“Hi, bud,” you said.

Jack closed his eyes and sighed, long and loud, scrubbing his free hand across his face. You’d been able to watch the game, had watched the blowout happen in real time, just another loss in this skid, in a season that had started out promising for once.

“I’m tired,” Jack whined.

“You look like shit,” you told him. Jack stuck his tongue out at you. “Do I need to get Ty to delete Twitter off your phone again?” you asked. Jack rolled his eyes, but you weren’t joking.

“No, I just-” Jack rubbed his eyes again. “Did you see what my plus-minus was tonight?”

It was your turn to roll your eyes. “Oh my God, no, we’re not doing this,” you said. Sometimes Jack wanted to forget everything about a shitty game, but other nights he got frustrated and wanted to pick apart every mistake he’d made on the ice. You dragged your laptop closer to you. “C’mon, open your Netflix, we’re watching a movie.”

There was some scuffling on the other end, with Jack accidentally pointing his phone at the ceiling. “Fine, but I get to pick,” he said.

You argued half-heartedly with him for a while, but he won in the end, and you settled on some movie you’d both seen a dozen times. It was quiet while you watched, a comfortable silence, heavy with familiarity.

“Hey,” Jack said lowly as the end credits rolled later. You’d been half-sure Jack had fallen asleep on you. “Thanks.”

You smiled tiredly at him. It was late, and dark in his room, and you could barely make out his blurry form on your phone. “Anytime, Jacky,” you said, but you meant, “I love you.”

You can jump then fall, jump then fall Jump then fall into me, into me, yeah

Your doorbell rang one morning in early May. When you pulled open the front door, there was Jack, hands shoved deep in his hoodie pocket, standing on your parent’s front porch.

“I thought you weren’t coming home for a few weeks still,” you said, leaning against the door frame. The Devils season was over, but Jack had told you he was planning on sticking around for a while or traveling some before coming home for the summer.

Jack took one of his hands out of his pocket and ran it nervously through his hair. “I’ve been thinking,” he said, instead of responding to your non-question.

You raised an eyebrow at him. You’d known Jack for years, and you could probably count on one hand the number of times you’d seen him be nervous. “Well, don’t hurt yourself with that, bud,” you told him.

He made a face at you, but it also got him to smile. “Will you just let me-” he started, but he didn’t finish his sentence.

“Hey, c’mon, let’s go inside,” you said, stepping back to let Jack follow you into the house.

In the living room, the TV show you had been watching was still paused, but you both ignored it. You sat back on the couch, but Jack stayed standing, awkwardly shifting his weight from foot to foot.

“You’re freaking me out a little, Jacky,” you said.

Jack sighed and sat on the floor in front of you, leaning back on his hands with his legs stretched out in front of him. “I miss you,” he said.

“Jack, we talk every day,” you told him. “I’m right here,” you added softly.

Jack huffed and ran his hands through his hair again. He laid back for a moment, staring silently up at the ceiling fan as it slowly turned above you.

“Have you ever thought about getting back together?” he asked when he sat back up.

You thought about it a lot, actually, but you just said, “Yeah.”

“Do you think we could do it?” Jack asked next.

You hesitated on that one. You’d thought that, maybe, you could’ve made it back when you were in high school, but things were so different now. You’d listened to the opinions of others so much back then, had broken up in part because you thought that it was inevitable anyway. Could you make it through all that again? You still had a few years until you graduated, and New Jersey wasn’t exactly close.

Then again, you two were as close as ever. Jack had only missed a handful of your Saturday morning phone calls, and it was always just because of hockey. He was still sitting on the floor in front of you, looking nervous as he chewed on his bottom lip.

“I don’t know,” you said honestly.

Jack’s face fell a little. “Do you think we could try?”

“Yeah, I think so,” you said, just as honestly. You’d never been good at saying no to Jack, anyway.

Jack beamed, and you knew exactly why you still loved him after all this time. Jack leaned forward and tugged at your foot. “Hey, come down here,” he whined. “Wanna kiss you.”

“Or you could come up here?” Jack tugged harder. “Oh my God, you’re so fucking needy,” you laughed, but you slid off the couch and let Jack pull you into his lap.

His hands went to your waist, sliding under your T-shirt, and he smiled smugly up at you. “Hi.”

You pressed a kiss to his nose. “Hi,” you said back.

“Uh-uh, you can do better than that.” A kiss to his cheek. Jack rolled his eyes and put one of his hands on your cheek to drag you in for a real kiss. “That’s better,” he whispered, but you were already leaning in for another kiss.

[emf005]

Disguised Part 1

Jack x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, blood, fights, angst

Hop you guys like! Sorry it took so long to get this out I have had one heck of a week.. lolol.. Please comment and let me know what you think!

Ten Years Earlier:

There were flames everywhere. As a seven year old you had no clue what was happening. It was hot, but it was winter. You couldn’t breathe. Your eyes burned and so did your lungs.

Your skin was alive with pain and stinging. You felt painfully numb. Was that even a feeling?

You coughed. And then coughed again, harder.

The room swam and you tripped over something, hitting the floor with full force. You stared at the door you had been searching for. There it was, finally. But out of reach. Why did it seem everything was always out of reach for you? Just too small to reach the top shelf, just too young to sit with the grown ups, just too female to do anything of importance…

Tears leaked from your eyes, and not just from physical pain.

The door opened and more smoke fled in. You heard footsteps running in and, with the last bit of energy you pushed yourself up. You saw the blurry edges of a familiar neighbor.

Charlie?

Then you passed out.

Xx

You woke up in a cot a few days later. Looking around the small room you realized that you were alone.

Where were you?

You heard voices and then footsteps. You shut your eyes tight again just as the door opened.

Someone sat down on your bed.

“I’s knows yous ain’t sleepin’.” Your eyes flew open and you looked up at Charles. A crutch leaned on the cot, but you didn’t pay mind. You jumped onto him, ignoring the pulling of your healing burns. You buried your head in his neck. He grabbed onto you and held you close, just as frightened as you, though he’d tell you he wasn’t. He was three years older than you and the brother you never had.

"What happened? Where am I? Where's mum and dad?" You asked. The questions pouring out of you. The last you saw them, they had been unconscious in the living room.

Instead of answering he just hugged you to his chest tighter…

Present day:

"Strike!" The Newsies, your unofficial brothers, screamed in response to Jack's very lengthy and moving monologue.

He leapt off the stage and started talking to Charles… Well, Crutchie now. He hadn't gone by that name since the fire happened and you two became newsies.

Nobody knew you were a girl and you preferred to keep it that way… although, A bit of extra attention from a certain Jack Kelly wouldn't be so bad. But beggars can't be choosers.

You watched as Katherin Plummer walked up to him and you felt your stomach drop. Rich, pretty, and successful. How could you beat that? Especially when he didn’t know you were a girl and he didn’t know your feelings.You sighed and walked to meet up with them, tasseling Race’s hair as you walked by him. He shoved you and you laughed.

“Hey!” You leaned on Crutchie’s shoulder as you joined the group. “Beautiful speech, Jacky-boy,” you said, rolling your eyes. “I’s think you’s gotta future as a politician.”

“Oh hardy hardy har, Scabs.”

Scabs.

Your name.

It was pretty appropriate for a few reasons. When you and Crutchie first joined you had healing burn marks and cuts all over your body. All of them scabbing. You also always had some sort of cut on you. That you were picking at, hence all your scars. Being a newsie, especially one with a big secret, caused a lot of anxiety, you couldn’t help it.

You smirked at him and shook your head.

“So, wheres we go from here?”

“That's a question for Davey.”

“Well, where is-” before you could get your statement out, chaos broke out. You turned around to see the Delancies break into the theatre with cops on their heels. You swore, and Jack pulled Katherine to get her out of the way. She willingly applied.

Delicate little-

You didn’t get to finish your thought before you had started shoving the cops and Delancies, entering the brawl with full force.

You watched as all the boys started to get their asses kicked and then get out of the theatre. You and Jack somehow ended up side by side, fighting the delancies as the cops chased after the others. But then you saw him.

Snider the Spider stared Jack down, an evil grin on his face.

Not on your watch.

“Jack, get outta here!” You screamed. Jack looked at you.

“No!”

“Jack! Just do it!”

“But-”

“GO!” He was so startled that he dodged his last punch and ran up into the catwalk of Medda’s place. You fought off the Delancies and ran. Turning around only when you herald CRutchie scream for mercy.

You turn and see the delancies and Spider standing over him.

“Crutch!” You scream and run back over even faster than you had running away, barreling over sand bags and loose wires.

The Delancies and Snider watched you and left CRutchie alone coming after you instead. You watched as Crutchie crawled away.

Morris came at you with a swing. You easily dodged it and threw him into his brother who stumbled back into Snider. You laughed and turned, about to make your get away. Instead you ran straight into an officer who threw you back onto the floor. Morris and Oscar attacked, like hungry piranhas, though they at least were prettier and smelled better.

You felt pain erupt all over you until it was gone and you felt nothing, saw nothing, and for a few hours were nothing…

Xx

Jack stumbled back into the Manhattan Newsies’ terf. The boys were all hanging around, checking on each other after the brawl.

He couldn’t believe they got Crutchie.

“Damn Crip,” he mumbled, shaking his head, not knowing what to do next.

“Jack!” he looked up when Race called his name. He came running up to him. “Jack, where Scab?”

“Scab?” Jack’s eyes widened. No. They couldn’t have gotten you, too. You-you had run. He saw you.

He heard the familiar Thunk Thunk of a crutch. He looked up and saw Crutchie a bit battered, but alive and here.

“Crutchie!?” The crippled boy swallowed, tears in his eyes.

“They-they got ‘er, Jack.” he rasped out. “Jack-they they got ‘er.”

He collapsed, his crutch falling out from under him. Jack caught him and Race left, letting them talk alone.

“Who’s her, Crutchie? WHo’s got her? How did you escape?” Crutchie swallowed.

“Y/N, they got, Y/N.”

“Who has her,” Jack said, a bit confused not knowing Crutchie had himself a girl.

“Snider!” He exploded, hitting Jack’s chest. “They got ‘er, Jack! They got ‘er.” He sobbed, his voice breaking.

“Ok, ok. How did he get your girl, Crutchie. Just calm down and explain it.” Crutchie stared at him for a second not understanding why he was acting like he was until he realized he used your real name.

Crutchie settled himself and took a breath.

“Jack, Y/N is Scab.” Jack stared at his friend for a moment.

“What?’ Crutches sighed and lowered himself to the ground.

“I think you need to have a seat, Jack.

Xx

You had woken up in the refuge, staring at the ceiling, a thin stream of moonlight streamed through the small barred slit in the wall that was considered a “window”. You were almost as wanted as Jack was. Only the best accommodations for the Enemy number 2, right?

You sighed and shivered as the wind blew in and froze your toes, the scratchy, old, thin blanket doing nothing to protect you.

“Y/N!” You look up to see Crutchie at the slit in the wall. You eyes widen and you spring up, running to him.

“Crutch! What are you doin’ here. Are you dumb or something?”

“I needed to make sure you were ok, kid.” You sighed. “Are you ok?”

“Yeah,” you put your head on the bars. “How are the boys? Everyone makes it out alright?”

“Yeah, but I have someone who wants ta see ya.”

He stepped out of the way and revealed Jack. You stared at him and knew immediately that he knew. That Crutchie had told him. You had never wanted to kill the boy who was like your brother more in your life.

“Hey, Scab, how ya doin’?”

“You told him,” you glared at Crutchie and he looked away, not being able to meet your eyes. “The hell, Crutch!” You shouted as loud as you dared. Snider was listening… always was… and you didn’t want to get the boys caught.

“Scab-er-Y/N, are you ok?” Jack asked, concern filling his expression. You looked at him, grateful for the street lights that hid your face, yet illuminated his.

“I’m fine, Jack. Did anyone else get caught?”

They shook their heads and you sighed.

“Good.” You heard footsteps coming down the hall. You looked over your shoulder and swallowed. They heard you. They had to of.”You guys should get going.”

“But-”

“Do yous wanna get caught?” he swallowed and shook his head.

“We’ll get you outta here.”

“No, Jacky-boy, I don’t think you will. Do the strike and do it good. Win.” He opened his mouth to object, but you looked at Crutchie. “Get ‘im and yourself outta here before yous get caught.” He looked down and tugged Jack’s sleeve, pulling him away from you. As they made their way down the fire escapes he caught a glimpse of you in the light and his eyes widened with horror as he took in your face. Bloodied, bruised, and puffy. They had got you good… and that was not going to fly...

[lis-likes-fics]

Concussed

Pairing: Carlisle Cullen x Reader Word Count: 8,820 words smh jfc Warnings: Car crash, many injuries, idk Author’s Note: Okay... maybe I got a little carried away. I did tell you guys I was going to end up writing a couple about him. I’m going through my phase, lemme alone. There will be a part two for certain reasons.

~~~~~

The sound of Chief Swan’s car parking in his driveway next door didn’t phase Y/N. It was when she heard the people talking where she decided to go to her window and see what was going on. She opened the window and stuck her head out of it in curiosity. She saw Charlie and Billy, a very familiar face, play fighting in Charlie’s driveway next to the red pickup that had been parked there for a few days.

She looked over and saw Jacob, another familiar face because of his relation to Billy, and a girl. Y/N smiled when she realized just who the girl was. She waved out of her window like a child, “Hey, Bella!”

The group looked over and saw her peering down at them with the smile plastered on her face. Billy and Jacob smiled and waved, Charlie gave a small wave of her own. “Hey, Chief, Billy, Jake.”

“Hello, Y/N. How are you?” Billy asked with a smile.

“Same ole, you know me,” she responded.

A smile slowly spread across Bella’s face as the recognition settled in, “Y/N, it’s been forever, how are you?”

She smiled, “Hey, Bells. I’m good. It’s great to see you again.”

Y/N and Bella used to be great friends. She lived in Forks next to Charlie Swan her whole life. Her parents died in a car crash when she was very young and she was left with her grandfather, who died when she was sixteen. She began living on her own in the same house, too sentimental to move away. She had Charlie for adult supervision when she needed it, but she was pretty much independent otherwise.

Y/N, Bella, and Jacob used to play together all the time when she lived here with her. When she moved away, it was just her and Jacob. They hung around a little bit afterwards, but lost touch when they got into junior high. Y/N was currently a senior while Bella was a junior. She was a year older than her, which made her two years older than Jacob - another reason they lost touch.

Y/N stuck her head back in her window and made her way down the stairs and out of the house so she could get a better look at the group. She managed to get a short hug from Bella before they started talking again.

Billy smiled, “And there’s the trio. I miss the days you were just little kids playing in the mud.” Charlie nodded in his silent reminiscing.

Y/N smiled and nudged Bella a little, “Are you still clumsy?”

She chuckled lightly, “Are you?”

She smiled, “Fair enough. One reason we were such good friends-”

“You were both accident prone,” Jacob finished with a laugh.

“Still are. You had to make sure we didn’t get ourselves killed,” Y/N joked. He nodded as he sighed, a smile on his face as he remembered the old days where you were just little kids.

Charlie spoke, patting the truck, “So what do you think of your homecoming gift?”

Bella’s eyes widened in wonder and she looked from the truck to the people standing around her, “No way. The truck is for me?”

Charlie nodded, “Just bought it off Billy here.”

Jacob smiled, “I rebuilt the engine and-”

“It’s perfect!” She beamed, rushing to the truck with Jacob in tow. Y/N stuck by the window with a smile as she watched them. Bella got in and was given an overview by the long-haired boy while she rolled down the window for Y/N.

She turned to Jacob, “Maybe I can give you a ride to school.”

He shook his head regrettably, “I go to school on the reservation.”

Y/N spoke, “Maybe you can give me a ride. Jacob’s fixing my car right now and I’ve been snatching rides from a couple friends from school.”

She smiled, “Yeah, that’d be fine. It’ll be nice knowing at least one person there.”

She nodded, “Everyone’s super nice, for the most part. You should make friends quickly.”

~

Over the next couple of weeks, Bella, like everyone, was instantly interested in the Cullens. They were always the attention grabbers of the school, but no one hung out with them or thought well of them because they never hung out with anyone other than themselves. They were a strange group and they got a lot of unnecessary thoughts and names because of it. Y/N didn’t mind them. They were interesting and that was that.

Unlike the Cullens, especially Edward, he was interested in Bella as well. It took awhile for that to come to light, he’d run off after her first day at school. She’d told Y/N all about it on the way back home after school and, while it was strange, it wasn’t too strange for the Cullens. After some quick reassurance, they were fine.

When Edward returned, so did Bella and Y/N’s chat about him. She was sitting in her car, the window rolled down on the driver’s side so she could chat with Bella while she stood outside of the car. “This homework is ridiculous. You’re lucky you have another year before you have to do this,” Y/N complained as she stared at the sheet.

Bella wasn’t paying much attention, her gaze shifting from her own homework to Edward staring at her from across the parking lot. Y/N sighed and went back to her work before hearing a strange screeching sound coming from the end of the lot.

She looked up and saw a van skidding on the ice, careening out of control, headed directly for them. Y/N moved quickly to attempt getting Bella in the truck before the van crashed. She reached over and got the door opened before Bella noticed the truck, tripping on the ice under her feet and causing her to fall back against the door.

The door slammed hard back into Y/N’s skull and she moved to grab her head, her eyes hurting as she squeezed them shut. When the truck rocked back and forth slightly, she opened her eyes again, against the strain, and struggled to look out of the window to see Bella unharmed on the other side.

Her head was hurting too much for her to question how Bella got out of that without a scratch. She sighed and got back to her side, letting out a sigh as her dizziness crashed into her like the door did to her skull. Her vision strained as it sunk in and out.

Her headache began to sink in after her ears started ringing. Bella, getting over her shock, stood and turned to the window to see if you were okay. “Y/N?” She asked, her eyes wide and concern slipping into her voice. Her voice sounded muffled and distant, she could barely make out what Bella was saying.

She looked at Bella with unfocused eyes, “I’m fine.” Her words were slurred, barely hearing her own words over the ringing in her ears. People moved to look when they realized she was in the truck as well.

Students started swarming over to her side, looking in through the open window. They spoke in a choir of mumbles and muffled questions. Someone pushed his way through the group to look at her. “She needs to go to the hospital,” Y/N didn’t pick up a single word of that, but Bella did.

The last thing she saw before slipping into her first round through consciousness and unconsciousness was someone quickly rushing to get both Bella and Y/N to the hospital.

~

Y/N sat in the room surrounded by white, her feet hanging off the edge of the hospital bed as she kicked them in front of her. She had her hands steadied on the bed to keep her from falling over from the slight dizziness. The ringing had gone down, but it was still there in the background. Her headache was the only thing that had decided to stick around the way it had before.

She was just trying to convince everyone that she was fine. Just like Bella. She looked across the room at Bella, who was talking with her worried father about the accident. She looked away instead of trying to get her eyes to completely focus, the strain hurt.

When the doors opened, a stunningly handsome doctor came through them with a charming smile. He had icy blond hair, pale, ivory skin, and a smile that could kill. His face is kind, but pale, tired - that didn’t make him any less beautiful. He was drop-dead gorgeous. Y/N was sure she was shot with Cupid’s arrow.

He went straight to Bella first, “I heard the Chief's daughter was in.”

Charlie nodded, “Good. Dr. Cullen.”

Dr. Cullen, the head of the Cullen Family. Well, no wonder he was so beautiful. This was Carlisle Cullen.

He turned to the E.R. doctor, “I’ve got this one, Jackie.” She handed him the chart and left. He reviewed Bella’s chart, then felt the back of her head, “You have a nice knot growing back there, but your x-rays show no indication of concussion.”

Tyler Crowley, who Y/N assumed was the one who hit the truck, spoke, “I’m so sorry, Bella. I’m really-”

He was cut off by Charlie pulling the curtain between them. Yep, he was definitely the one who hit the truck. Y/N watched the interaction with a slightly tilted her. She was focusing in and out, not caring too much about anyone but Dr. Handsome.

Bella muttered, “It would have been a lot worse if Edward hadn’t knocked me out of the way.”

Charlie furrowed his brow, “Edward? Your boy?”

Dr. Cullen looked up before looking back down at the chart. Bella continued, a hidden goal in her words now, “It was amazing he got to me so fast. He was nowhere near me.”

He gave her a smile, “As long as you’re safe.”

Bella sighed and glanced as Y/N, who was visibly spacing in and out. She was still trying to get over her headache, but it was a little hard when it rattled her brain like it did. She was just waiting for a doctor to get to her like they said they would.

Carlisle followed Bella’s gaze to Y/N. At first, it was just a glance before he looked back again with a slight intrigue. He quickly finished up with Bella before turning back to Y/N, walking over to her with a smile on his face. She gave a seemingly distracted smile back and he picked up her chart from beside her, looking over it closely.

“What’s your name?” He asked her, looking back up with that same smile. Only this time, she got a good look at his eyes. They were a magnificent honey gold that would have made her weak at the knees, had she been standing.

Instead, it was substituted by a fluttering in her stomach. But who was she kidding, he was probably already married. He had kids, for God’s sake, adopted or not. She glanced down at his hand while he stared at her chart and felt a little bit of unnecessary hope when she saw no ring.

It didn’t matter, though. He was way out of her league.

She struggled to find her voice for a moment, trying to recall the question before answering in a slurred tone, despite her best efforts to make it clear, “Y/N Y/L/N.”

“Y/N, “ he said, as if tasting her name. He nodded slightly, “How are you feeling?"

She shrugged, “I’m okay.”

Dr. Cullen raised a blond brow very slightly before asking, "Any ringing in the ears? Headache? Dizziness?"

"Maybe a little,” she sighed, the slur becoming painfully obvious. He grabbed a small flashlight from his pocket and checked her eyes, running the rest of his tests. He looked back at the chart and sighed, “You've got a minor concussion."

“Course, I do,” she sighed, laughing weakly, “Brilliant.”

He gave her a sympathizing look and smile, speaking in that calm voice of his, “I want you to try to avoid unnecessary movement of your head and neck as much as possible. Limit your exposure to bright lights and loud sounds. Stay hydrated and get lots of rest. That said...you should be staying home for a couple of days before trying to get back to school."

‘Whatever you want, Doctor,’ was what her mind said before she quickly revised her sentence before she said it impulsively, “Alright. Thanks, Doctor.”

He nodded, “You’re very welcome.”

Dr. Cullen finished up with her before helping her off the bed, his icy cold hand placed on her arm so she didn’t trip and fall, which she was bound to do otherwise. Before they left the hospital, she was scheduled for another check up in two days.

She was rather giddy to know that she’d be seeing the blond beauty again in two days. She could hardly wait. She was driven home by Bella afterwards. She told her, “Hey, really sorry about the concussion. It must hurt.”

Y/N shook her head as she lied, “No, not at all.” She would rather not have people worrying over her. She was a lot like Bella in that area. The “suffer in silence” type.

She looked in her driveway and chuckled humorlessly at her car parked in the driveway. She nodded and walked up to the door. She moved the mailbox next to her door to reveal the small “hole” behind it where the car keys were hidden with a note.

When her grandfather was alive, he would often forget where the keys were so she had to put a spare in that space. She might as well use it since it’s there. The note read, “Finished the car. Good as new. You weren’t here so I dropped it off. -Jake”

She grabbed the keys and the note and went inside the house, closing the door behind her. She immediately got a glass of water and took a nap. She was tired.

But the nap didn’t stop her from thinking about the handsome doctor. If anything, it encouraged her as her mind wandered with fantasies of her and the gorgeous man.

~

Y/N got in her car on the day of her appointment. She was slightly giddy and she wanted to be annoyed with herself - she was acting like a child going to see her crush. She had to continuously remind herself, ‘Dr. Carlisle Cullen is way out of your league. Ring or not, there was no way he would be interested in you. Wake up.’

The reminders deterred her mood a little bit, but not enough to get her to calm down. She pulled out of the driveway and headed to the Forks General Hospital. After waiting for the nurse to show her to the room she’d be getting her checkup in.

“Y/N Y/L/N,” the nurse called, looking around the room that sat four other people. She looked up, a tight smile on her face, “Right here.”

She gave a soft smile and said, “The doctor will see you now.”

Y/N stood and followed the nurse down the hall. She led her to a room where there was a doctor waiting-- not the doctor she was expecting. The doctor smiled at her as she motioned for Y/N to sit down in front of her. Y/N obeyed, her heart sinking in her chest a little bit.

‘He’s probably not here…’

“How are you,” she asked. Y/N gave a tight smile and shrugged, “I’m okay, thank you.”

“Let’s see what we’ve got,” Dr. Lacey looked at the clipboard, “It says here you got a minor concussion a couple days ago?”

Y/N nodded, “Uh, yes. Dr. Cullen assessed me.”

“Ah, yes,” the doctor said, as if fantasizing now. She shook her head and sighed, “So you're coming in for a checkup?”

Y/N nodded. The doctor nodded back and went through the checkup to make sure everything was in order. She took a little longer than Dr. Cullen had, he was efficient and certain of every move he made.

Y/N stopped and sighed to try and rid her thoughts of the golden eyed doctor. She didn’t need to be thinking about him, it would turn into obsession quickly if she continued to wonder about the doctor.

“Alright, you look alright. Be sure to take it easy, if you must go to school, take it easy,” Dr. Lacey broke her from her thoughts.

Y/N responded with a sigh, “I need to get back to school. But I will take it easy.”

“Alright, then. Drink plenty of fluids and be careful.”

“Will do. Thanks.”

After the checkup, Y/N left the room. Her hands gripped her bag as she walked down the hall. She looked up and saw none other than Dr. Carlisle Cullen walking down the hall her way.

He gave a warm smile, “Hello, Y/N. How is your head?”

She smiled back at him, “It’s better. I just came up for my check up. I...expected to see you...” She very slightly furrowed her brow, looking into his eyes. They weren’t the same honey gold eyes they were, they were darker, more brown than they were before.

He nodded, looking down at the chart in his hand briefly before looking back at her, “Something came up and I wasn’t able to take your case.”

She nodded, “Oh, okay.” He motioned to his clipboard and said, “I’ve got to go. Have a nice day, Y/N.”

She smiled at him again, waving, “Bye, Dr. Cullen.” He nodded with a smile and left. She sighed, turned around, and left.

‘So much for ‘not here’,’ she thought before walking off.

~

It had been a while since she’d seen Carlisle. She hoped the distance and time would help stop her little fantasies, but it only made them worse. Every day and every night, she found herself thinking of Carlisle Cullen. It was driving her crazy.

She could barely focus on the work in front of her as she waited for her next class to start in the parking lot next to her car. When the bell rang, she sighed and threw her bag over her shoulder, beginning to turn to head back into the school. She paused when she saw Bella walking away and towards the forest that bordered the school.

She shook her head, “Where is she going?” She began to follow her, tell her that class was the other way. As Y/N headed over, she saw Edward headed after Bella. She knew she should have turned the other way and given them their privacy but, if they were missing a class period to do something, it would have been good.

And she was never one to miss out on eavesdropping.

She waited after most of the crowd had cleared before headed into the edge of the forest, walking a little ways longer before she finally saw the pair in the distance talking. She could make out some of what Bella was saying, facing away from Edward as he stood rather strangely behind her.

“...skin is pale-white, ice-cold. Your eyes change color. And sometimes you speak like... you're from a different time,” Bella said, slightly shaken, but not scared. She turned to face Edward now and Y/N furrowed a brow. Her mind wandered back to Carlisle, how his eyes went from gold to dark brown (almost black), how his skin is also pale and cold. She shook her head and turned back to them.

Bella continued, “You never eat food, or drink, or come out in the sunlight. And you said no to the beach trip only after you heard where it was. Because of the treaty.”

‘What treaty?’ she thought. She wasn’t at the beach trip, she turned it down to do homework since she was behind. Before she could think on, Bella spoke again, “How old are you?”

Edward hesitated before speaking, something in his voice that somehow made Y/N cautious and alert, goosebumps rising on her skin from the sudden awareness of all of her escape routes. “Seventeen,” he said.”

Bella continued, “How long have you been 17?”

“A while.”

‘Is she calling him a…’ Y/N couldn’t bring herself to even think of the word. That was absurd! Vampires didn’t exist…

“I know what you are,” Bella said to him, Y/N was barely able to understand but it was audible enough for her to make out.

Edward spoke, his voice firm, edging on chilling, “Say it… Out loud… Say it.”

His tone and his look made Y/N feel a little more frightened than she was before and it was ridiculous. She shouldn’t be scared, he wasn’t a vampire. Was he?

Bella hesitated before finally admitting, “Vampire.”

Edward didn’t deny it and that’s what began to concern Y/N and pierce through her unbelieving thoughts, “Are you afraid?”

She shook her head, “No.”

‘Is Edward…’

His tone was angry now, it only added to Y/N’s fear, “Then ask me the most basic question: what do we eat?”

“You won’t hurt me,” Bella said instead of answering.

The fear that had now stricken Y/N to the core was what completely convinced her that this wasn’t just some weird, strange game the two had going on. Edward was a creature that was believed to just be a myth, this thing that hunted humans for their blood. For food.

Y/N turned around, leaving the forest as quickly as possible before she was found. She didn’t know what to do, so she raced to the parking lot, got in her car, and went home. She could worry about her absence in the rest of her classes later. Right now, she had to make sense of things.

If Edward was a vampire, what does that mean for the rest of his family? Were they all vampires? Was Carlisle…

She didn’t want to think about it. This was absurd, she was crazy. Any moment now, she would wake up from this stupid, sick dream.

No one was a vampire.

But when she didn’t wake up, she was truly surprised and shocked. She got inside as quick as possible and paced around her house anxiously. How long had Bella known? How was she not scared, at least even a little bit? If Edward was a vampire, he had to be dangerous right? Was she safe?

Y/N downed a glass of water to try and calm herself. She needed to calm herself so she could think rationally. After a while, she decided she needed a nap. Maybe a nap would make everything make sense. Or at least calm her enough so she could think straight.

~

A knock on her door woke Y/N up. She looked at her clock, realizing the time. School had gotten out by now, that could be Bella. She got up and walked cautiously to the door. When she saw Edward on the other side through the peephole, her breath caught in her throat as she stilled.

“Y/N,” he called on the other side. She let out a silent breath, tensed up from her unexpected and potentially dangerous visitor. He spoke again, “I know you're in there. Just let me in, I won't hurt you.”

She thought about it quickly before deciding to just open the door. Her trembling hand landed on the knob and she let out another silent breath before pulling the door opened. She ran a hand through her hand and asked nervously, “Are you all…?”

He sighed, “Can I come in?”

She bit down on her lip and stepped aside, allowing him to step into her home. She closed the door behind him when he was inside and then turned back to him. He gestured for her to sit down and she took the opportunity, looking back up at him anxiously.

“Yes, we're all vampires. Me and my family,” Edward nodded, answering her question.

She thought to herself, ‘Did he know I was there?’

As if he knew what she was thinking, he spoke, “Yes, I knew.”

‘How did you-’

“I can hear what you’re thinking,” he answered her thought once again, “Some of my kind have gifts, I can read minds.”

“Then...why did you let me hear?” She asked. If he knew she was there, He could have easily stopped the conversation until she left, or told her to leave himself.

He shrugged, “I had to break the news to you somehow. The opportunity was right there, so I took it.”

“But why?” She asked him, confusion written in her tone. He sighed and stopped to think for a moment before admitting, “It’s complicated… How is your head?”

Y/N brought her hand up to touch her head as she answered, “Better…” The topic of her head made her think about Carlisle again. Her mind wandered as Carlisle’s face appeared in her thoughts. Only, instead of the golden eyes she remembered seeing that first day, she was met with blood red eyes that pierced into her soul.

Edward shook his head, “Carlisle's no monster. He's anything but. You can trust me on that. He’s the reason for our current lifestyle choice.”

The fear in Y/N’s eyes returned very slightly as she thought about that answer before Edward caught himself, “We consider ourselves vegetarians. We don’t feed on humans, we feed on animals instead. It’s why our eyes aren’t red.”

That calmed her a little more and she turned to play with her hands. She was clearly still shaken and Edward caught onto that. He spoke through the silence that began to settle, “I should be going…”

He stood and turned to the door. He placed his hand on the door knob before turning back to her, “Y/N… please know that we aren’t going to hurt you.”

She considered her words before allowing them to make sense in her head. If they were going to hurt her, they would have done it already. She nodded, “Okay.” He nodded to her, before finally turning and leaving.

She thought about her visit from Edward a lot after that-- not nearly enough to be more than she thought about Carlisle, but it was a close second. His words calmed her more, they seemed sincere enough for her to be able to believe. But she was still shaken and working on the believing part.

She still went to school. She decided her fear shouldn’t be enough to put her further behind than she already was by missing just two days of school before and then half a day after the big reveal. She was wary of the Cullens, but she wasn’t scared of them. If she was, it wasn’t as much as when she first learned of their secret.

Their eyes seemed to watch her sometimes, as if they were trying to see every move she made, waiting for a slipup. She assumed it was because she knew their secret. She wouldn’t tell anyone, she wouldn’t risk anything by telling someone. Besides, people would think she was crazy if they did.

Y/N assumed Edward had told his siblings this because they stopped watching her so closely after a while.

Her schedule consisted of school and home. She didn’t have reason to be any other place, so she stayed inside. There was apparently some wild animal attacking people in Forks. Now that she knew about vampires, she had her suspicions. After Edward’s admittance of their diet, she had reason to believe and trust that it wasn’t them. So she had to be careful.

She was doing her homework again one afternoon. She saw that there was going to be a thunderstorm sometime later on, so she moved her work outside to get some air before that happened. She didn’t like being outside during any storm, rain or not.

The door opened at Bella’s house and she turned her head to see who it was. She saw Bella and gave a wave, “Hey, Bells.”

“Uh- Hey, Y/N,” she responded, giving a wave of her own.

Suddenly, Edward stepped in view and she looked up at him. She’d gotten quite used to him, but she still wasn’t that used to him. “Hello, Y/N. How are you?” He asked her with a soft smile. He was still trying to ease her into this. He didn’t want to spook her.

She had been spooked enough when she found out.

“I'm fine... Thanks,” she cleared her throat.

Edward thought for a moment before speaking, “Bella and I are going to play baseball with my family. You're more than welcome to come, if you would like.”

She shook her head, “No, I'm okay. I wouldn't want to intrude, I’m not a big sports person anyway... You have fun, though.” She gave a tight smile.

He nodded, “Alright. Good night.”

“Good night,” she said after him as he walked away with Bella. They got in her car and drove away. Y/N sighed and stood, walking back into her house to make whatever she had in her fridge for dinner.

~

Y/N looked out of her window from her room when she heard a car drive up to Bella’s driveway. She was probably just getting back home. It was already dark outside, it would make sense. When Bella slammed the door, Y/N opened her window and looked out. She seemed angry.

“Bella, is everything alright?” She asked, glancing at Edward behind her.

She looked up at Y/N. She nodded, Y/N could tell through the darkness of the night because of Bella’s pale skin-- although not as pale as Edward’s. “Yeah, just... We're fine. Stay inside.”

Y/N trailed off, “Okay…” She glanced at Edward through the dark. Edward’s pale white skin allowed her to makeout the look on his face. There was a warning in his features, not a warning against him, though.

She retreated from her window, closing it shut and returning to what she was doing. A few minutes later, she heard the door to their house slam as Bella drove away quickly from the house. Edward wasn’t with her. Charlie was standing in the light of the porch, watching her leave with a seemingly pained expression.

Y/N stood at her window, looking as best she could without opening it. She was confused, why did Charlie look like that? She sighed, it wasn’t her problem, she shouldn’t be so concerned about it.

She shook her head, retreating from her window once again and deciding to go to bed. Everything was sure to blow over in the morning.

~

A strange crash was heard downstairs as Y/N woke up suddenly from her sleep. She thought about what to do, there was an intruder in the house. She looked around her room and grabbed her baseball bat. Her grandfather had made a bat for her when she was younger and it was one of the really sentimental things she kept around, even if she didn’t play.

She carefully locked her bedroom door and went into her closet to hide, clutching the bat in her hands tight. After a moment, her door knob jiggled furiously. She pushed her hand against her mouth to keep her quiet. She was terrified at this point.

When the jiggling stopped, she removed her hand slowly. Then the door was kicked down and off of its hinges, making her jump as she clamped her hand back over her mouth and stopped breathing to stay quiet.

She couldn’t see anything, she didn’t take any chances with leaving the door opened just a crack. She listened closely and allowed herself to breathe as silently as humanly possibly.

Soft footsteps were heard on the other side of the door. With how soft they were, this had to be a woman. Why would there be a woman inside of her house trying to get to her?

The footsteps stopped. Y/N stilled and held her breath again so she could hear anything that happened. When the footsteps continued, they seemed to stalk closer to the door and Y/N’s heart only continued to pound in her chest. It was pounding so fast and so loud that she could feel and hear it in her chest. She was sure it would stop soon.

There was more silence.

Y/N let out a yelp as the door opened violently and revealed a woman with fiery red hair. Her eyes were wild and sadistic as she smirked maliciously at her. “Hello, there,” she said.

The woman grabbed Y/N by her throat, pulling her back to her chest as her hand moved to cover her mouth. Her other hand came to pinch her nose, keeping her from breathing as she slowly and painfully stopped the air flow from reaching her brain and lungs.

Y/N struggled against the woman’s hold, trying to scream and yell to try and get the attention of the chief next door, who’s probably already asleep. Y/N’s struggling slowed as she grew weaker. She started seeing black spots in her vision as if faded in and out with each failed attempt to breathe.

Soon, she couldn’t fight anymore as her body went limp and she went unconscious. The woman let go of her, dropping her to the floor. Her goal wasn’t to kill her… yet.

~

Rosalie and Esme were sent to Bella’s place to guard Charlie and Y/N. Rosalie was confused as to why she needed protecting. They didn’t associate with her, the tracker, James, would have no reason to try and hurt her.

As they came up on the house, Esme checked quickly for Charlie to make sure he was safe. When she saw Charlie sitting in his house, she nodded to herself. Charlie was safe.

Rosalie took Y/N’s, looking inside the house. She stopped when she saw the door slightly opened. She walked up to the door, pushing it open as it squealed against the motion. She stepped inside and saw the broken vase on the floor behind the door.

Whoever opened the door before must have knocked the vase over by opening the door too quickly. She looked up the stairs, rushing to the top quickly and seeing the door on the floor. It had been kicked down. She searched the house quickly, listening closely for a heartbeat. She found nothing but an empty house.

She rushed back to Esme, “We have a problem. The girl isn’t here. Someone broke in.”

Esme’s eyes widened slightly and she grabbed her phone, quickly calling Carlisle to inform him of the news. When the phone picked up, she spoke quickly, “Y/N’s gone. She’s been taken.”

There was silence on the other end before Carlisle spoke, his voice was still calm, but it was lower in tone and held a slight edge to it that only a vampire could pick up, “What?”

Rosalie spoke, knowing Carlisle would be able to hear her, “The front door was opened and her bedroom door was kicked down. She’s nowhere.”

Carlisle’s grip on the phone tightened, but he eased it before he could break the phone. There were tiny dents where his fingers had squished the phone. He spoke in a disturbingly calm voice, “Watch Charlie. I’ll handle Y/N.”

He hung up the phone and returned his grip to the steering wheel. Edward and Emmett had heard the conversation on both ends. Edward was the only one who knew what was going on, Emmett was still trying to catch on. Why was this girl so important?

Carlisle stepped on the gas, carefully not to step too hard so his foot didn’t go through the bottom of the car, as he spoke, “Continue heading to Bella, I’ve got to turn around.”

Edward saw his plan before he could ask. They came up to a dealership just after Emmett asked Edward’s forgotten question, “How are you doing to get there?” When he saw the dealership, he spoke, “Oh.”

Carlisle pulled over and got out of the car, handing the keys to Edward. Edward told him, “Good luck.”

He nodded and Edward moved to the driver’s side before pulling out and speeding down the road again. Emmett was still confused as to why Y/N was so important, but he thought it best not to ask. The answer would probably pop up eventually.

Carlisle disappeared into the car dealership, intent on finding Y/N.

After the long process-- at least, it was long for him --of getting his car, Alice had called Carlisle’s cell. She spoke quickly, knowing he was already listening. “I see her. She’s in her car, in the back tied up. Victoria’s taking her somewhere.”

“Where are they?” Carlisle asked, his tone patient but his emotions anything but. Alice was quiet for a moment, looking closely into her vision before answering, “They’re headed to Seattle.”

“Thank you, Alice,” he told her sincerely. Alice hung up the phone and he sped down the road on his way to her.

~

Y/N inhaled deeply as she began to open her eyes. They fluttered before finally settling to see what was around her. She looked up and let out a small groan, “Where am I?”

She looked over when a female voice answered, “She’s awake.”

That woke her up completely. Memories from earlier hit her like a train as she went to sit up, realizing her hands and legs were tied up. The bindings were tight, she could barely move her fingers because her hands were tied so close together. She managed to sit herself up with tons of difficulty.

The woman was driving so quickly that all Y/N could make out through the windows were shades of dark green and blue. It was still dark outside, so she hadn’t been out for too long. The speed was enough to make Y/N nauseous as she moved to put her seatbelt on, going as quickly as possible in her panic. She needed to stay calm and the seatbelt was some sort of mundane reassurance.

“Where are you taking me?” She asked, her breath quick with worry.

“Nowhere you need to be in a rush to be. We're going to meet your friends,” the woman responded with a sadistic smile.

“My friends?”

“The Cullens,” she answered her.

Realization hit her as Y/N let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. She spoke in a slight whisper, “You’re a vampire.”

The woman looked in the rear view mirror at her, giving Y/N a view of her crimson red eyes, “Smart girl.”

Y/N gulped, “Are you going to kill me?”

“No, of course not,” the woman said, before shrugging a shoulder and smirking, “Not yet, at least.” She looked back at the road for a moment and Y/N looked around quickly. There had to be some way for her to get out of this situation. She couldn’t defeat a vampire, if she tried anything, she probably would kill her earlier than expected.

Before she could think of anything, the woman’s eyes turned to the mirror again and she frowned, snarling at what she saw. She turned around to see through the windshield in the back. Y/N looked back as well, but she couldn’t see anything. They were going too fast for her to make out a single thing.

The woman huffed and turned the wheel harshly, vastly overestimating the turn before the car swerved dangerously off the road. They were in air for a second and that’s when time seemed to slow.

Y/N was nauseous as she felt herself lift off of the seat as she seemed to float on thin air. A cry left her throat and tears pricked in her eyes as she feared for her life as she thought about the impact of crashing at this speed.

In the second they were in the air, Victoria managed to open her door and dart out of the car, leaving Y/N there. She was already gone before the car even crashed.

The front wheels crashed onto the ground harshly and the nose of the car dug into the soil. It flipped the car over as it landed on the hood, the back of the car propping up against the tree behind it.

Y/N groaned and she smelt the smoke and gas. She moved, but she was stuck and there was a pain in her chest that made it hard to breathe. A strangled cry let her throat as she looked down and saw a large shard of glass sticking out of her chest. Her head spun and she was nauseous all over again.

She looked down at her seatbelt slowly, pressing the button to take it off before falling to the bottom. The glass on the bottom sliced at her skin and she winced. Blood, sweat, and tears covered her. She looked to see if she could find a way out of the car. She could hear the gas leaking out of the car, it would blow with her in it if she didn’t get out.

She ignored the glass and other sharp materials, moving to get to the door, to open it so she could escape. She tried all she could but she couldn’t reach the door, she was trapped.

But then the door ripped off of the car, allowing a passage to escape. She wiggled toward it, but she could barely move, the car was beginning to collapse in on itself and it was weighing down on her.

She could barely see, her vision was blurry and going in and out. It was so hot, it was making her dizzy. She saw a pale form in front of her, but she could make out a face. The form ripped the car apart over her so he could grab her, pulling her out of the car and to safety.

When she was finally out of the car, away from the heat and the gas, a round of coughs rattled through her. The smoke was no longer trying to cloud her lungs as she went to breathe. When the coughs subsided, she blinked until her vision slowly came back to her.

She looked back down at the glass shard in her chest, she brought her hands up, reaching her fingers to grab the shard nervously. When she had a good enough grip, she closed her eyes shut to brace herself.

“No, don’t do that,” a voice said. She knew that voice.

Her eyes flew open and she saw Carlisle, reaching to grab her hands. She reacted quickly, rushing to get away from him. She couldn’t move very well, the bonds wouldn’t allow it.

“No! Don’t touch me!” Y/N screamed, flinching away from the desperate touch of Carlisle. Her eyes were wild, her breathing fast and shallow, her whole body trembling in uncontrolled fear.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” Carlisle said, gently taking Y/N’s hands and holding them firmly. Their eyes met. “Listen to me,” he told her, “You’re safe and they aren’t going to hurt you again. I’m here now. Trust me, I won’t let anybody hurt you.”

Carlisle almost expected Y/n to yank her hands away in her panic, but she didn’t-- instead she relaxed a little, tears slipping from her eyes, and let out a breath, “I…”

“It’s okay,” he said, smiled, and pulled her into a hug she didn’t resist. “It’s okay, I’m here.” She calmed the best she could and her exhaustion snuck up on her, causing her to pass out in his arms.

He sighed and looked at the wounds all over her body, then glaring at the glass in her chest. He needed to help her quickly. He took off his jacket, removing the shard and tying it around her chest as tight as he could without suffocating her.

He set her in the back of his car so she could lay down and made sure she was alright. He stepped on the gas and they were off to his house in no time at all.

~

Y/N breathed in suddenly, her eyes shooting open as she went to look around frantically to see where she was. Her body was in pain, but it didn’t hurt as badly as it did before. A soft, calm, soothing voice spoke to her, “Hey, hey. It’s alright, calm down.”

She looked to see Carlisle hovering over her, cotton in hand as he tried to get her to calm down. “Where am I?” She asked quickly, still working on the adrenaline she’d built up while she was asleep.

“Just relax,” he told her, “You’re in my home.” She took a breath in and allowed herself to lay back again. He gave her a reassuring smile, dabbing the cotton ball against a cut on her forehead. She winced and looked up at him while he worked.

“What happened?” She asked quietly.

He looked down at her, his eyes darker than the honey gold. They were around the same color she saw when she went to the hospital the second time, only they were slightly darker. “You don’t remember?” He asked, just as gently.

She looked down at her chest, there were stitches there that explained the numbness.

The glass shard in her chest from the crash.

She looked at her hand, seeing her bruised wrists.

The rope she was tied in by the woman.

It all came back to her as she looked over herself and then back into Carlisle’s still calming eyes. She remembered seeing those eyes after being dragged out of the burning car by him.

“You... You saved me,” she mumbled, sight disbelief as she stared at the gorgeous man.

“Of course, I did,” he told her gently as he bandaged the cut on her forehead. She had quite a few bandages on her body. She remembered the cuts and scrapes from trying to escape from the car.

She shook her head and blinked, “But...why?”

“I couldn't let you die, Y/N,” he said softly.

“Because you’re a doctor,” she concluded, feeling a little down by the answer.

“Because...it's complicated,” he shook his head and let out a sigh.

Y/N nodded, sighing slightly before wincing from the action, “That’s what Edward said, too.”

“You know our secret,” he stated more than asked. She nodded, “Yes.”

“Edward told me,” he replied.

She looked back at him, “Are you mad?”

He glanced at her, a small smile on his face, “Of course not.”

She managed to crack a joke, surprising even herself, “Just disappointed?”

He chuckled lightly, she felt triumphant about getting a chuckle out of him, “No, not that either.”

She smiled slightly before it dropped again, “Then what?”

Carlisle hesitated, setting the cotton ball down as he looked back at her, into her eyes. He stood blinking at her, lost in thought as if he tried to find out how to respond. He finally spoke, looking away from her as he did, “I’m captivated by you.” He returned his gaze to her curious, sparkling eyes.

“Me?” She questioned, shocked and surprised, “How?”

He chuckled weakly again at how shocked she sounded, “It has a degree of fate in it…” He returned to his work, picking up a cream and rubbing it onto her wrists over her bruises without hurting her.

“Ah, yes. Fate. My favorite thing,” she joked, watching his hands move along her wrists. He genuinely laughed, the two of them relaxing a little more before he turned to her ankles to rub the cream on the bruises there as well.

After rubbing in the cream, he bandaged the bruises and flashed her a smile, “I’m all done.”

She smiled at him, “Thank you, Carlisle.” She moved to sit up a bit more and he helped her so she wouldn’t hurt herself more than she was already hurt.

He shook his head, “There’s no need to thank me.”

She stared at him, memorizing his features like it would be the last time she’d ever see him. Another gaze into his eyes and she remembered the second checkup. He was supposed to be her doctor. She knew his answer was a lie, she just didn’t want to point it out. But she felt a degree of necessity now.

“Why weren't you the one to take my case when I went for my checkup?” She questioned, a soft expression on her face as she examined his.

He sighed and looked down at his hands holding the role of bandages. “You,” he said, only looking up after, “It’s the same reason my ears are a different color than the first time you met me.”

She listened intently, her eyes never leaving him as he spoke, “When I said a degree of fate, that's what I mean... Your blood attracts me. I’ve lived a long existence and I’ve never had to try and hold myself back. It’s how I know…”

She furrowed her brows and he looked down and away from her again. She moved her head so he would look at her again. She threw her legs over the side of where she was sitting so her body was facing him now, “How you know what?”

He looked back up at her, the way she was sitting now put him standing between her legs. Neither of them seemed to notice, though. They were wrapped up in their conversation.

“It’s how I know you’re… my mate,” he finished, watching for her reaction closely. Once again, she was caught by surprise. “I’m-” she closed her eyes and shook her head before looking back up at him, “Like a soulmate?”

He licked his lips with a light chuckle, “More or less, yes.”

She blinked at him, “Me?”

He sighed slightly, furrowing his brow as he gazed at her. He spoke gently, “You really don’t see it?”

She shrugged lightly, “I don't see how you could be… How I could be... You're way out of my league.”

A smile tugged at his lips, “Apparently not.”

“I don’t know what to say,” she chuckled.

He shook his head, “You don’t have to say anything.” He set a hand under her chin, lifting her head a little to see him better before dropping his hand. He spoke in a gentle tone, “You’re perfect for me.” He smiled and kissed her forehead softly.

She gazed into his eyes, the eyes that seemed to turn lighter with every moment that passed, as if her presence was restoring their warm, honey golden hue. She licked her lips, her eyelids fluttering. They were so close now.

“Why did you save me?” Y/N’s voice was barely above a whisper. Carlisle had managed to take her breath away as she tried to regulate it again.

His hands moved to her arms, just above her wrists. He slowly drifted down until they took her hands in his own. Her breath caught in her throat and her eyes darted from his to his lips. Their fingers intertwined as they relished in the slow, sensual moment. Everything was still and calm, nothing was disturbed or had any sign of turning out that way.

It seemed like they would be frozen in place like this before Y/N made the first move, her hands moving from his as her arms wrapped around Carlisle’s neck. She pressed her lips to his, letting out her breath at the relief of the kiss.

Carlisle’s hands fell to her waist, steadying her as he kissed her back. Their lips molded together, moving in sync with each, in perfect harmony. She could feel what he meant about being his “mate”. She could feel that bond, that connection that they held. She was Intoxicated by him.

Her fingers intertwined in his hair, keeping him as close to her as possible. She wanted to feel him against her, his body close to hers in that sensual moment. It was as if the world stopped around them, as if it allowed them to have the moment for as long as they wanted, allowing them their forever.

It took awhile for Y/N to finally pull back to allow her lungs some air. Their eyes were closed, her forehead pressed against his as she caught her breath. He didn’t move from where he was, relishing in her presence. He spoke, his voice a whisper in the air, her words meant for her ears only, “I don't want to lose you.”

That was enough for her as she smiled and brought him back into another life-altering kiss.