#ask chii

[aliusfrater]

sam's early seasons anger is his response to the trauma obtained within the (non)family unit that is john-dean-sam, but most importantly, it's his response to the abuse john had inflicted upon both himself and dean, and it's very often on behalf of dean, who in his own codependent dynamic with john as a parentified child, non-pathologised john's abusive actions and was unable to form any kind of significant pushback against john's abuse. john's abuse is grief and emotion projected outwards onto dean, a child, the son, who gains the unjust responsibility of having to manage his father's emotions. sam refuses to be like dean and cater himself to john largely because he, through his Othering and detachment within his family and hunting, is able to view john's actions as what it is—abuse. he acknowledges this in over and over season one both with reference to the fact that what happened to them was 'not normal' and with specific reference of why john's actions are abuse—"you were just pissed you couldn't control me anymore!" he expresses his refusal to fold into the same mould that dean has through anger, first through character-typical malicious compliance, in which he asks questions he knows he is entitled to (and generally believes in arming oneself with information, due to both the chronic lack of information john and dean had provided him with as a child (3.08)) but knows john will view as disrespect (due to the fact that it strays from the codependent role that dean has folded himself into on john's behalf; he does what he's told and asks no questions, though is generally awarded more information due to his parentification) and then through argumentative behaviour. both john and dean frame john and sam's arguments as sam's fault but this is the most encapsulating abusive aspect of it—john's (the parent) response to sam (the son) is not sam's responsibility.

i don't think his revenge is encapsulated by his anger; his revenge comes from their familial idealistic response to grief, and anger is a part of grief, rather than the other way around. instead of processing this grief, it's channeled into revenge. it's a foundation of hunting for a lot of hunters, which is both a literal and metaphorical representation of the cycle of abuse (and when it isn't hunting, it's represented in blood (re: men of letters)). his conflict with lilith isn't wholly about his revenge for dean's death, especially after dean is resurrected. i think it's more so related to my interpretation of sam's character conflict for that season being that of rejecting what the codependent dynamic of his and dean's relationship¹ had become by season three in favour of his own independence; his conflict with lilith and how ruby plays into this conflict began with revenge then became the nucleus of his rebellion against dean (which does include anger²). he acknowledges this directly in season five—"dean, one of the reasons i went off with ruby... was to get away from you. [...] it made me feel strong. like i wasn't your kid brother."—but it doesn't help that both ruby and the angels were actively encouraging this conflict between sam and lilith largely because of the fact that it 1) re: ruby—represented a course of agency for sam outside of dean and presented an opportunity for her own manipulation of sam (she filled in a dean-like role in the sense that she catered to everything sam wanted the actual dean to be doing for him—namely the acceptance of his monstrosity—while presenting him with a facade of independence), and 2) re: ruby and the angels—provided them with a pawn to break the final seal by dressing up the idea of lilith as free of negative consequence through the omission of information (according to both the angels and ruby, lilith was the one who had to complete breaking of the final seal. to sam, killing lilith was morally righteous).

²i do think that sam has a general undercurrent, simmering, and oftentimes outward yet compartmentalised anger that he utilises within his own agency outside of his relationship with john then dean. however, i do think that the very core of it is more related to his Othering, monstrosity, and the loss of control that he feels when his environment responds to his monstrosities. sam admits to this as well—4.16, "well, get angry." / 5.11, "most of the time, i can hide it, but... i am angry. i'm mad at everything. i used to be mad at you and dad, then lilith, now it's lucifer, and i make excuses. i blame ruby or the demon blood, but it's not their fault. it's not them. it's me. it's inside me. i'm mad… all the time... and i don't know why."—and something that really intrigues me about the latter admission is the event preceding it: he's tied to a bed (much like the conditions of the panic room) and his anger is victim blamed with explicit reference to his monstrosity. "you are far too angry to be out there in the real world," is a very pointed and crazy ass line on the 'we kill monsters who fall out of line and into our line of sight' show directly after the season in which he perceivably became the 'them' within the 'us vs them' metaphorical equation. the people that sam bring up are also representations of either his Othering, a loss of control, or his explicit monstrosity. his anger began with his father's abuse and continued long after his death when he passed control of sam's life over to dean who, through his inability to properly handle the past responsibility of parentification, perpetuated it into this request made by john which clashed with dean's existing ideas of monstrosity; sam's existence outside of the existing dichotomy of hunting prompted the stretching of this dichotomy to fit sam (dean’s season two conflict re: sam) rather than the destruction and rewriting of the dichotomy itself and in that way, sam still ended up othered within his existence as a threat to the upturning of their familial hunting beliefs. ruby and lilith (as well as azazel) represent the pretence of control just as much as they represent his unknowing grappling for control (addiction) as well as his monstrosity due to how he employed his monstrosity within his conflicts with them while lucifer represents an entire loss or both perceived or preconceived control—both the idea of sam's monstrosity in an inherent sense, as well as sam's complete lack of control are cemented with lucifer's existence just as much as the preparation (azazel's plans, and it does intrigue me that azazel isn't listed here) leading up to it.

it's foundational to my interpretation of sam that he believes that his monstrosity predated his explicit narrative monstrosity due to the abuse—neglect and isolation most importantly—he experienced as a child and the resulting guilt complex that he's left with, which he then encapsulates within the revelation of his unwilling/unknowing ingestion of demon blood as a baby and i think that with every complex-reinforcing factor that introduces itself into his life, he weaponises/quite simply falls back on his response (anger) to the most original grooming, abuse, and explicit example of a loss of control and Othering in his life—the john-dean-sam dynamic, with an explicit emphasis on john (kind of in a similar way to my idea of dean's reaction to a loss of relationship control, which is to begin recreating the same dynamic). a lot of it comes down to the fact that while he is angry on behalf of himself at these structures—familial, patriarchal, hunting, cycles (of abuse, grief)—he exists within but are both othered and controlled by, the general narrative and sam-dean relationship dynamic pushback against his response to this aspect of his character being that of both adding his response to reasons for/blatant instances of his othering as well as using his response to facilitate the realigning of his non-position within these structures, creates a self-deprecating loop of guilt and results in an anger at himself that echoes exactly the way that these structures demand that his identity be compartmentalised through. basically, it spells either ‘there is something inherently illicit about me. i need information/forgiveness/change (in that order)' or the usage of both this feeling as well as his perceived monstrosity/aspect that he is othered as a result of as agency as seen in season four, five, six, and season eight, is extended onto dean in season eleven, then jack in seasons thirteen through fifteen.

ultimately, these structures' facilitation of sam's non-role involves the depletion of sam's anger and results in his later-seasons characterision that is best (but not wholly) encapsulated within 7.17, "get pissed!" / "i'm too tired," especially when the circumstances of sam's response—in regards to the fact that dean has resouled sam despite his (5.22 and soulless!sam's) explicit doubled lack of consent against it, and while creating the issue that is sam's psychosis, has restored sam/sammy's rightful narrative place within his non-role—not only serve as a perfect example for the abuse dynamics of his and dean's relationship and how it facilitates sam's non-role within said relationship as well as the structures that this relationship is encapsulated by, it also serves as a perfect example for exactly how sam's anger worked, what its purpose was, as well as exactly how and why its depletion facilities his complete assimilation into these structures' atmospheres of abuse. the Whole topic of sam's later-seasons lack of anger (or anger when utilised) is an entirely different post, though.

¹specifically relating to 1) identity and monstrosities relating compartmentalised through the ‘us vs them’ dichotomy of hunting and how it manifests into a relationship dynamic where sam is dean's little brother, sammy, put on a pedestal of innocence because his innocence became dean's responsibility within his parentification and any indication of sam's monstrosity, as something evil encroaching upon Sammy, is therefore viewed a personal failing despite the unequivocal place it holds within sam’s being, 2) and 3).

[vampuppyy]

just saw ur pinned once again what the FUCK is that fascist assign or something

Well you see someone called me a fascist because I don't believe in endogenic systems and am anti ship (1 day prior to that someone else called me proship. the public has mixed opinions on me) and not to forget pro gaslighting but don't worry about that I'd never lie ever. everyone can trust me ❤️

[memchiix]

HOW MANY FELONYS DID HE CAUSE?!?!

Well i mean him taking Dr.Khal’s robot around the city could’ve potentially caused a whole bunch of cases of property damage, injury or worse just by that giant robot walking around. Plus, there was that one time he stole some lady’s car and crashed it in her ex’s yard (which would be property damage and theft), oh and every time him and Mugman have broken into the mausoleum (so trespassing on government property). There’s probably more but that’s all i could think of rn

[starswallowingsea]

So mad i couldnt find card renders for these but I'm right objectively

[dollicacy]

hi princess Yurei Your blog is so Eye candyed I Know you Dont Like pink as in it not Your fave color But U have syuch good Taste and Good eye for deisgn Hope that make Sense

omg... ill hold ur kind words close to my heart <3333. idek how u knew it wasnt my fav color or if i ever told u but thats so considerate and thoughtful of u omg??thank u sweet girly angel

[potat0bag]

question about shiver, sela and chi hohojiro! because theyre all born from the same type of tentacle, are they all identical in height? if not who’s the taller one?

Sela and Chii are identical in height because they were both cut at the same time, and are twins. Shiver was made at a later date. ^^

[liverpool-enjoyer]

MAX QUICK QUICK QUICK

mitochondria or chloroplasts ????

yes, this is as random as ever.

SHIT BRO YOU KNOW I GOTTA GO W THE POWERHOUSE A THE CELL 💪😤 MAMA DIDNT RAISE NO PLANT

this post was made by animal cell gang

[rtonart]

Silly Game Time: Who are some of your favorite mechanical characters, be they robots, androids, cyborgs, or something else? And what do like about them?

I’ll give you my top 5 that changed my brain chemistry for the rest of my natural born life. Android 16 from Dragon ball Z. Motoko Kusanagi from Ghost in the shell. Kos-mos from Xenosaga. Joe Shimamura from Cyborg 009. Chii from Chobits. I loved practically everything about Android 16. He was so kind and sweet his whole story in the show was just tear jerking. Motoko Kusanagi. God what isn't there to love about her? She's just so cool and complex she could easily kick my ass and I'd thank her for it lmao. I don't know how many know about Xenosaga because it's so niche but Kos-mos is just so cool! It's a shame the series was cut short because her story and love for Shion was really very touching. She's also got a belly lazer that's pretty sick. I wish they'd re-release that series. The first game is my absolute favorite. I used to play it all the time until I wore the disk out. It's honestly been so long since I've seen Cyborg 009. My biggest reason for liking Joe was because as a child I had the fattest crush on him. I need to re-watch that series. God Chobits that's a throwback and a half let me tell you. This was one of the first manga series I read all the way through. It's gotta be in my top five favorite romance anime. Chii is just so childish and sweet, oh man and the outfits they put her in! They're top tier pretty. Chii I think is the only one on this list that probably couldn't kick my ass and even then that's debatable lol.

[childishfirmino]

🌼 PICK ME! CHOOSE ME! LOVE ME!

EHJDHDJSJSHDJSHSJDGD UMMMMMMMMMM

[theyaoiconnoisseur]

hewo? trick or treatttttt :333

Have this Pringles can as a treat, don’t mind the holes :3

[cryingforcrocodiles]

lemme stop singing 'oh na na, whats my name?' every time i see onana's name on my dash 😭

kid u not, united fans would make rhianna's song his new chant (they rlly should)

im going insane in my room it's on my jbl speakers brother. STREAM IT

[catastrothy]

Which do you prefer:

Free-range countryside Wilde slimegirls, just troddin about, absorbing who knows what each step of the way as they enjoy life, carefree

Or

Lab-grown slimegirls who finally escaped their pressurized glass prison, and finally take a humanoid shape for the first time, and go about being 100% intelligent and 100000% feral

a carefree life is a good life and the more ethical choice but i am weak to character dynamics where a inhuman character is learning to be more “human” so like. i would be far more interested in scenario 2 as a story

[vampuppyy]

is my understanding correct

HELL YEAH IT IS !!!!!!

[memchiix]

What's Shoko's dynamic with the main 4?

Shoko, Cuphead and Mugman are all friends, with Cuphead being the closest to her. The two are very often hanging out with each other.

A little funny thing about Shoko is that she likes to say weird shit like “mint is just cold spicy” to see the brother’s reactions to it. Basically every time Cuphead starts laughing his ass off while Mugman just gives her a “why are you like this?” Look lmao. It took Shoko a long time to be able to let their guard down around the brothers, and given Cuphead was the first of the two to really go out of his way to befriend her, she naturally drifts towards him. Cuphead also likes to involve Shoko in his pranks.

Anywho uh, She doesn’t have much of a dynamic with the Devil. She doesn’t interact with him much outside of work obligations, mainly because she’s rather afraid of him, dor multiple reasons. She didn’t realize she’d be working for the literal devil when she signed up to be a bartender. She thought the whole “Devil’s Casino” thing was just a marketing thing to draw in customers.

With King Dice, she was intimidated by him at first, but eventually Shoko found out he knew some cartomancy stuff and they’ll occasionally chat about that during downtime. She’s slowly getting more comfortable around him.

Idk how to summarize their dynamics so i just rambled a little lmao. Sorry about that.

[jangmi-latte]

Idk what that anon was talking about regarding to your blog's theme. I literally think it's gorgeous like damn how do you do it? Especially the colors oh my- how do I explain it. It's GORGEOUS! While I do love your other themes I think the newer ones are just as special as the others. Literally! Honestly, everytime I visit your blog the sound of a door and a bell ringing from a café always comes to my mind and the smell of fresh brewed latté greets my nose.

Idk but that's what I always get with your blogs. Forgive me if this was long, I just wanted to say that that Anon was wrong. It's beautiful and will continue to be 🤧❤️

WAIT WAIT WAIT 🥹🥹 THE CAFE AND BELL RINGING!!! SENT A PANG TO MY HEART IN A GOOD WAY???? because i did put up a cafe aesthetic when i started and eventually grew out of it slowly but but but it still holds a special place in my heart because i love cafes and milk and i still try to bring those vibes and UEUEUEUEUEUEUEUUEUEUE IS IT STILL THERE

ILYSM I HOPE YOU GET VERY CLEAR SKIN AND GET ENOUGH WATER AND SLEEP AND YOU GET THE BEST BREAKFAST LUNCH AND DINNER EVERYDAY AND I HOPE YOU GET CUTE ANIMALS SMILING YOUR WAY BECAUSE YOU GOT ME TEARY EYED!!! /POS

[loz-the-noob]

THIS ONE . THEY REMIND ME OF PIERS AND GLORIA

oh yeah! I see it