#apparently there's a weirdo you can summon like beetlejuice if you mention him

[hibernating-stag]

I've heard there's heated debate on this topic but I Do Not Care, I formed a solid opinion the first time I saw one of his win screens

^ This guy HAS to be 15 ^

[beetlejuicewrites69]

Concept: Reader is Lydia’s big sister, is told about Beej and has probably personally met Adam and Barbra; but when Lydia actually breaks down and summons him during dinner, reader just has an Oh My Gosh This Dirty Ray Man Is The Love Of My Life moment and Beej can not figure out why Lydia’s sister of all people can barely get a coherent sentence out around him (Cue Lydia face palming in the background at both of them)

author’s note: holy shit, i love this concept so much. if i do this right, please let me know if you want me to continue the story because i’m so down to turn this into a series. i switched it up a little, but i hope you enjoy it :) 💚💜

Sister’s Story

beetlejuice x reader that is also lydia’s sister

You loved your family, but dear God/Satan, you loved being away from them just as much. Even when your mom was alive, you valued your freedom. Once she died, you decided it was time to spend some time alone. Your little sister, Lydia, stayed back with Dad. They moved to a small town in Connecticut, while you chose to stay in the Big Apple. You had been twenty then, and as incredibly scary as it was, it was the best decision of your life. It was a little lonely, but you still saw Lydia and Dad at the major holidays and events when you road-tripped home.

Four years had passed, and a ton had changed. Your dad has gotten remarried to Lydia’s ex-life-coach, and their house was apparently haunted. You had met two of the three residential ghosts. Adam and Barbara, an incredibly sweet, but lowkey boring, married couple, were a great second set of parental figures for Lydia, especially since you weren’t around much. The third ghost that frequently haunted the new(ish) Deetz home was named Beetlejuice.

Now, you had never seen him, but Lydia told you all the stories. He was a legendary disaster. Your sister had pushed him off the roof, married him, killed him, and then befriended him. That entire story freaked you out, but Lydia never backed down from the fact that overall, Beetlejuice was a good guy. She always gave you updates on all the crazy shit he did and said, and she tried her best to describe him, but she always finished those stories with “It’s to hard to explain, you kinda have to see for yourself.” He was a mythic demon.

Emily raised you to seek the strange and unusual, and this demon being unintentionally hidden from you was aggravating. Whenever you visited the house, he never seemed to be around. It was purely coincidental, but it bothered you. Over the last four years, he had been hyped up so much that you had begun to frequent the house more and more.

Your incessant knocking led your father to answer the door. His booming, yet gentle, voice greeted you.

“Y/N! What a pleasant surprise!” he swallowed you up in a hug. His embrace lifted you off the ground, your feet left dangling.

“Hey, Dad,” you laughed as he returned you to the ground. The roar of combat boots stomping down the hardwood stairs brought your attention to farther inside the house.

Lydia screamed when she finally made eye contact with you. At 19, she was finally beginning to look closer in age to you. All your life, you felt as if the five years between you two were so distant, but now that you were 19 and 24, they felt too close.

“Y/N!” she jumped on top of you, tackling you down to the ground. You struggled to breathe.

“I’ll, uh,” Charles laughed. “Leave you two to catch up.” He walked away to the kitchen, where Delia popped her head out to wave hello. Smoke wafted behind her, and she turned back in, coughing.

Barbara spoke up from deeper in the kitchen. “Delia! Close the oven!”

“But Y/N’s here!” Delia protested. “It’s just a chicken, calm down!”

Your sister’s grip tightened. “I have not seen you in SIX MONTHS!” she leaned in closer to your ear. “Bitch.”

You shoved her off of yourself, giggling through it all. “Watch your mouth, that’s illegal!” You stood up, pulling Lydia with you. You both plopped down on the couch.

“Ok, what’s happening, girl,” Lydia lovingly mocked Delia’s tone. “Fill me in! Spill the tea!”

“No tea to spill, weirdo,” you shoved her shoulder. “Just the usual. Love my job, hate my landlord, still,” you sigh, “single, I’m considering getting a cat. Your turn.”

“Ok, um...” she tapped her chin playfully. “Well, at work the other day I did this photo shoot for these people whose dog was, like, dying, and they dressed him up in a tuxedo to take farewell photos. Super weird. Very weird family.”

You laugh at the anecdote, and gesture to the dining room table. “Weirder than this?” Adam and Barbara were setting the table, while Charles and Delia were making out against the kitchen doorframe. You shook your head, grossed out, yet glad your father was happy. “Disgusting. You know what, I heard something else in this house is disgusting. What was that again?”

Lydia raised her eyebrows. ��I told you, you have to figure out how to summon him yourself! If you’re truly connected to the spiritual world, you can do it yourself.”

“Lyds! You know how much I love this shit! Don’t do this to me!” Your frustration increased as the conversation went on. Lydia refuses to tell you how to summon him, and whenever she requested his presence, he was always busy. “How am I supposed to believe he’s even real if I’ve never seen him?!”

Adam popped his head out from the dining room. “He’s real, unfortunately. You don’t need to see him, you can smell him a mile away.”

“Well I’ll never know,” you threw your hands up in frustration. “because no one in this God/Satan forsaken house will let me see him!”

Lydia tilted her head and gave you a weird look. “Huh,” she pondered. You hadn’t seen Lydia in a while, and you weren’t sure what just bothered her. She shook her head, her expression never changing. “He says that all the time, too.”

“What?” you questioned right as Delia called you all to the table. You missed family dinners like this, and you truly did cherish these moments. Even though Adam and Barbara weren’t eating, they kept the four of you company. You loved hearing your weird family’s laughter and conversations, yet Lydia’s previous comment continued to bother you.

Halfway through dinner, the conversation turned to ghosts. As you ate, you questioned the Maitlands. “So, could you eat? If you wanted to?” Adam and Barbara shrugged.

“I mean, yes,” Barbara said. “But we just don’t need it.”

Adam nodded in agreement. “We aren’t hungry anymore.” Delia set her fork down hastily in response.

“Then WHY is Beetlejuice so hungry all the time?!” she exclaimed. “I’m always missing food because your little friend keeps stealing stuff!”

Lydia explained bluntly, “Beej is a special case.” You were so sick of all the mention of Beetlejuice, and it had finally got to you. Your utensil clattered onto the plate as you groaned loudly.

“So when am I gonna meet this guy, huh?” you said, a little too loud. “All I ever hear is BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE, BEETLEJUICE!”

Lydia’s eyes widened as a puff of green smoke appeared at the other side of the room. A new chair had materialized at the head of the table, and in it sat an unfamiliar figure. He was large and grimy, with bright green hair and a smirk plastered across his face.

“You called?” his mouth opened, spilling out a gravelly voice. You point accusingly at him.

“Are YOU Beetlejuice?” you gape across the table. From his dirty suit to the crazy look in his eyes, he looked certifiably insane. However, something shocked you about him. He was cute. He had dimples and laugh lines around his eyes; his brown roots gave him a more human appearance. He looked to be around your height, and his dirty striped suit was well tailored to his body type. His voice, while scratchy, was the most beautiful sound you had ever heard.

“That’s my name, babe, don’t wear it out,” he winked at you, then turned to Lydia. “Who’s the new girl?”

Lydia took one look at you, noticing your still agape mouth. You had been single for way too long, and this man had taken your breath away. She sighed. “That’s my sister, Beej. Y/N, remember?”

Beetlejuice stretched his arm across the long table to poke your jaw back up. His elongated arm kinda freaked you out.

“Is she okay?” he laughed at you. You stuttered, trying to find the words to say. He poked your face again before retracting his arm back into his body.

“Holy shit,” you whispered. You stared at him in shock a little bit longer, the table silently laughing at your response. Beetlejuice just laughed loudly and smiled.

“Oh man, she’s fun. She better hang out with us more often,” he leaned back in his chair, checking out the family. You gawked at him, taking in every imperfection on his strangely beautiful face.

Realization of your awkward silence hit Lydia like a train. She facepalmed and went, “Oh no. This was a mistake.”

Beetlejuice ignored her, flashing across the table to poke you in the face again, this time up close. He leaned into your face, peering at you. “You’re way less chatty than Lyds, what’s wrong with you?” You laughed awkwardly and uncontrollably in response, while blushing at his sudden closeness.

Lydia just continued to shake her head in her hands.