#anyways i'm even worse about Paracelsus I have NO basis in the barks for my paracelsus thoughts

[pawacelsus]

Junia analysis?? Pls I’m be g g i n g you lemme hear your thoughts on bi nun waifu

OKAY SO you are enabling me and thank you Very much okay

this is gonna be PRETTY FUCKING RAMBLY and it’s gonna be KINDA FUCKING LONG in which case. I’m sorry. Please forgive me. gonna be under a read more because I suspect it’s gonna get very fucking dark but tbh it’s probably not anything you haven’t already heard/garnered from her barks

To start: TL;DR: I read Junia as being EXTREMELY young (no older than 25), suffering from pretty severe trauma from her childhood to now, has no true sense of self worth, and just... All in all is really fucking going through it.

I’m going to break this down into three aspects, the first primarily being her irrational barks. Something to keep in mind, the irrational barks... Well, they’re irrational. They’re not saying stuff that makes sense. But, in the Vestal’s (who will be referred to as Junia), we can see some snippets of her past in between the gibberish. We get a glimpse into how she views her fellow sisters, how she was treated, and how she might’ve very well become a nun.

To begin, the first batch of barks I find interesting revolve around “the pigs of St. Martha’s.” As listed here:

we can see her view of them is... Far from positive. She refers to them as pigs twice, mentions one by name if only to insult her, and there are far many more where she says things about them in a fearful tone. Obviously, she isn’t quite a fan. To further this, I draw your attention to the aforementioned “fearful tone,” involving her view of Mother Superior and what went on:

(While not irrational, I still find it interesting that she finds no fault in this fact (masochistic camping barks, if you are curious where this comes from))

So, quite obviously Junia suffered some extent of abuse from the Convent, and one might argue equally at the hands of her Sisters as well as the(?) Mother Superior. And this is only from the irrational barks. I choose to read them as “I have experienced such extreme stress that my walls and attempts to look normal have failed and I am now blurting memories from my trauma,” but you might choose to dismiss them as... Irrational. And that’s understandable. But, I wish to remain here as we look a bit more to her familial relationship.

In such an area, one bark stands out the most to me:

Knowing that Junia has no truly fond memories of the convent (that we know of), Junia calling out for her parents and saying “Too late!” makes me wonder what might’ve happened. Was she truly taken away? Or was she so young that her childish brain simply caused her to believe she was taken and her parents must’ve fought for her back, but they were simply too late. We can’t really tell. Still within irrational, I point us now to:

Important thing to note, this happens while she is damaging herself. Actively harming herself, while saying she will be no “mother” of any kind. Junia with mommy issues confirmed 2021? Jokes aside, I take this as Junia lacking any sort of positive mother figure, to the point of fearing such a thought. But I digress, that’s a bit off topic.

So, we have now established that, to be frank, Junia’s time in the convent sucked ass. To hopefully drive my point home, I have one final irrational bark:

This line has bothered me, because to this day I am left horrified of what might’ve been asked. I will not elaborate, as what I project personally with that line is for me alone.

Moving on.

Junia’s age is something that I have decided for myself based upon one bark and lots of thought. The bark in question:

Could also be used to prove that she has absolutely no sense of self esteem. She says it herself, she isn’t a hero. She’s just a child. Could she be simply referring to herself metaphorically? That’s... Probably what’s happening. But Junia being extremely young makes me sadder so that’s what I go with. There’s little else to add to this point.

In truth, there’s only one more thing I like to note, which is her constant reference to her work under the Light as slavery. Back to the previous barks I mentioned where she talks about being “taken,” I find it interesting how there are several times where she talks about slavery, all within different afflictions:

The reason this intrigues me is that, if this isn’t confined to one single type of bark (only irrational or only hopeless), then the thoughts must be somewhat strong, yes? But I digress.

As some ending thoughts, I just want to say that I didn’t cover her EXTREMELY common references to being, for lack of a better term, “unvirtuous” because... I think it just takes one look to know that the religious trauma and the extreme guilt for fucking breathing is strong with this one. This isn’t really an “essay” or well formatted, I just tried to talk a bit neater this time around. And, again, I don’t think this is any new revelations, this is just how I enjoy seeing her. I like Junia being an extremely young yet aged-beyond-her-years girl who has gone through shit but hides it. I also like to imagine her and Paracelsus bonding over “shitty adolescent years” because do not get me STARTED on all my shit for Para.

Anyways Junia is my favorite character, she deserves so much better, I want to give her a hug, a warm blanket, some hot coco and a nice movie so she can fucking relax, 

and of course I see her as bisexual and like to imagine in a more lighthearted way that she comes to terms with her sexuality with the help of her fellow adventurers and comes to Actual Terms that what the convent did to her was REALLY fucked up. Junia recovery story when. Junia learning she has worth outside her dedication to her religion when.