#anyway <3 I'll stop being a dork for a little while | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tkmicha · 10 months

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So, I'm gonna share what happened over the weekend with my favorite person. Ik they're finna see this and call me out on it but.. whatever 😋

So, I'm gonna use a nickname for them instead of their real name.

So me and my best friend pinkie were hanging out over the weekend and it was so fucking perfect! We watched "Miraculous, the Tales of Ladybug and CatNoir" (the movie) and "Scott Pilgrim Takes Off" together and it was SO GOOD

(I love Marc and Nathaniel from miraculous and I love Todd, Wallace, and Roxy from spto)

But anyways, we cuddled and hangout throughout the whole day, it was so fun and I felt truly at home. But by the time we finished the movies it was like, 2 or 3 am and we decided to finally go to bed.

We layed down together and began snuggling, and us being us we kept eachother up by being playful and talking together. We were laughing and being silly together and I rolled over onto my side to face away from him pretending to be mad at him (it's something we do to mess with the other- idk how to explain our shenanigans)

But I got the confidence to ask him if he'd hold me and he did, he put his arm under my head and spooned with me, it was SO comfy and it made me very happy. But ofc him being the dork he is decided to mess with me and blew onto my neck and I flinched away. I laughed at him and snuggled closer to him and he put his mouth onto my back and blew into my back.

I asked, "what are you doing?" He replied "nooothing" as i rolled my eyes at him before he did it again "you're making my back warm" that's when I realized he was just blowing into the back of my shirt and it was heating up my back. I shook my head at him while smiling then he blew into my back right between my shoulder blades and it caught me so off gaurd. I rolled over and looked at him as I gave him a playfully "annoyed" look as he said "maybe I should do that to your stomach"

I got so much butterflies in that moment and I just shoved him away playfully. He's the only person who knows I'm ticklish, tbh I didn't even really know I was till I met this dork.

But fast forward a little bit and we're cuddling while he's on his back and I'm holding onto him, I had my hand in his shirt on his stomach bc I was a bit cold and he had his down mine on my back. I decided to scribble on his stomach a little, he's not ticklish barely at all, sometimes he is sometimes he isn't but even when he is he's not nearly as sensitive as I am😒 but he wasn't even trying to stop me and I teased him about that and I felt his hand skitter up my back and I imidialty arched my back away from his hand and smiled at him nervously before he pulled his hand outa my shirt and started pressing around on my back, I can't really defend myself since his arm is behind me so I just try to tickle him back, it didn't work ofc.🙄

But anyways we're laying there talking about stuff, ocasionally messing with eachother and he grabbed one of my arms and dug into my side with the one that was around me, I squirmed around and laughed into him, I was trying not to laugh too loudly because by now it's like 4am. After a bit he let's me breathe and I lay there catching my breath and I hear him say "I wonder if your stomach is ticklish" and I just froze, my brain went bdiejeisndwpnsosjs

He laughed at me then I admitted I didn't know where I was ticklish, hell I didnt even know I was till he tickled me. He spat out "well I'll find out for you" and I just laughed nervously, my stomach doing absolute tornados.

A bit later of more talking and what not I think we may have just been laying there enjoying eachothers company and I decided to try and tickle his underarms, but litterally NO reaction, I tried his sides, stomach, neck, NOTHING, absolutely no reaction and I was just dumbfounded, like huh?? How??

I grabbed his thigh and I hit a certain spot and I smiled thinking I found one and he dug into my armpit and I straightened my posture so quick and squirmed. "Oh? You're ticklish there too?" He said and I just told him to shuddup. I was so embarrassed and then he rolled toward me and started to dig into my side, I laugh and squirm and he hits a certain dip in my side and I squealed and said "not there" faintly between laughs. He stopped and looked at me innocently and I buried my head into the side of him as he was laying back on his back.

Idk, I admit stupid stuff when I'm tired and he was most definatly making me sleepy so I say "you hit a weird spot on my side and it felt weirder than everywhere else" and I like, massaged where it was, and he said "you're not supposed to tell me where" then grabbed me right there again and I imidiatly began to laugh and squirm in his grasp. I tried to grab his hand and he dug into my underarm and it shocked me, idk if he hit a sensitive point or what but wherever he dug his hand tickled like he'll and so again I cried out "no! Not there" faintly and he moved back to my side.

After a while (5am) we decide to go to bed, he blamed me for keeping us up but he was the one tickling that all the time smh🙄 we can never decide on one position but after a while we found the perfect one, he was on his back with his arm out and I layed on his arm facing away from him with our legs intertwined.

The next morning was filled with us randomly poking at eachother, he does this thing where he randomly jabs at my neck and I imidiatly laugh and scrunch up. He's never fully tickled my neck just little pokes and it already drives me crazy so that makes me nervous (/pos) for when he actually will do that to me.

Fast forward a bit and we're laying on the couch, I was across his lap and he was sitting normally on the couch. I had a devious idea to tickle him, the ONLY spot this dude is ticklish is on his feet so I reach down and tickled him but bro squirms so much it was hard to.

After breakfast we go back to my room for a bit and I lay down and ask him for a massage since my back be aching, i tell him it's easier when you sit on the person's back (because for me it is, when I'd lightly scratch his a while back)

And he did, he had his legs proped weirdly to where there was a pocket of space between where he was and where his legs were. He massaged me for a moment and then before I knew it he dug into my sides. I imidiatly tried to shoot my hands down but his legs blocked me from doing so so I thrashed around before he stopped and rolled off beside me, he threw a pillow ontop of my head and walked around the bed.

I told him "I can't see where you are, whatcha doin?"

And I feel him dig at the underneath of my knees one at a time as he worked up jabbing at random parts of my body, I then turned my head to face him and said "I see you" and he just smiled at me innocently.

Fast forward to the sad part when he has to leave, his father is on the way and I ask him to give me affection because I love being dramatic and bratty to him. He layed beside me and I layed on his legs and tried to tickle his feet to get back at him and he moved so damn quick and I almost fell off the bed, I got up and then layed beside him, we had a small tickle fight before he got a text from his parental figure that they were there to pick him up. We hugged and it was honestly one of the best hugs I've had in a while. I love his hugs.

But when he went to leave I stopped him and pointed at my bed "put yo shoes on" i said as he replied with "nah, I never put my shoes on when I leave your house" with a smile on his face so I blocked his path. He jabbed me in the side and shoved me onto my bed and we both walked out the door.

A few hours later he found out about me liking being tickled and now he has my tumblr. So now I'll probably have more stories whenever me and pinkie hangout.

I love you pinkie if youre reading this💕🦋🦋

#tickle community #tword community #tickle scenarios #tword content #tickle thoughts #sfw tickling #tickle content #tickle fluff #tickle stories #tword post #tword blog #sfw twords #tickle fight

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drifloonz · 1 year

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would luv more general steven(or s!3v3n) x reader hcs..

i am so sorry you caught me in the middle of vc. some of these. also i accidentally closed the fucking tab and had to rewrite all of this. i hate being a writer on tumblr.

some of these are by my friends. some of them r by me. some are funny. some are serious. Some are all and or both

i just realized these are only general steven headcanons i am so fucking sorry i was tired and it was like 4-6 am. take them anyways i'll edit like a few actual x reader ones in

_______

he doesn't get outwardly super scared, but he DOES shiver or make discontented noises when he's scared. playing horror games with him is kinda funny. if you make him play a vr horror game he will hate you forever and ever. it's rly funny tho.

he tries way too hard. with everything. pre-incident? being a role model, being cool, being a trainer, being a champion for like one month, being stereotypically romantic, etc. post-incident? being scary, being intimidating, etc.

despite this he is still very dorky and awkward. at least pre-incident. it was common. type of guy to lean on a wall but he falls

he wears light cologne. i'd say he wears axe 3-in-1 but that'd be way too rude to both me and other stevenlikers.

pre-incident he trips over his words sometimes, sometimes his tones too flat, sometimes he speaks too loudly or quietly, etc etc. Basically. 'tism.

he's good at clue, the board game.

pronounces gif like "g.i.f" ( like it's an acronym ). please, god, make fun of him for this.

his hands are always cold for no fucking reason post-incident. if you hold his hands in the summer it kind of helps the heat go away. love wins

really wanted a guitar. he's a dork so he does air guitar sometimes when no ones looking or does guitar motions while holding a long thing that isn't a guitar. He would play guitar hero and be absolutely mid at it but blue and red think he's the coolest fucking thing ever for it. This is inspired by somebody elses hc i think(????). if u read this. ur a real one and r so true.

because of this if you actually got him a guitar i think he'd make a small genuine smile. he has executive dysfunction and depression so itd probably take a while for him to actually do anything with it, but he rlly appreciates the gesture.

also kinda has a good singing voice but is better at backing vocals.

he organizes things a bit too much, which stopped during his spiral phase, but for example his pc boxes are like. a living dex, or just by pokedex number. he prob never completed his dex tho. mike though who did/almost did, has Entirely unorganized boxes. after the incident he obviously stopped caring bc depression so like. yeah. so his rooms a little unorganized and his house in general. he will silently appreciate it if you organize it for him.

never allowed miki to have eggs bc 1; gen 1 limitations. idk how that'd work in universe but that'd probably be why it didnt happen in the pokepastas. 2; as you can tell. he's kinda overprotective of miki. also charizards aren't like. very regular pokemon you find and he wouldn't want to breed her with a ditto. and would only want to allow her to if she actually found a for-life mate.

and for the x reader-ification of this in the edit bc i misread the ask, he'd also do it if ur dating him and u have a pokemon. for example, whatever starter you have and miki would b cute. straight couple.. yuri couple.. yaoi couple... love is love and miki doesnt care. its cute and they act all cuddly and snuggly with eachother probably. kinda reminds you of u an steven too

speaking of miki is larger than normal charizards and probably is built a little different literally and figuratively. stevens tall. miki is taller though. at the very least post incident Corpse Miki is. how unique she was did not help stevens rage ( getting a new one would not be nearly the same especially due to that + he would never. ) but it was a smaller factor in everything. also i do not think that thang can lay eggs post-incident. sorry if u wanted a fucked up missingno charmander.

even if the trade incident happened but miki came out alive he'd still go on a depression spiral. he probably wouldn't kill mike in the end, but he'd be much quieter, and would be even more paranoid. would probably willingly move away from mike or separate their rooms at the least. if u were dating him during this time you could probably at least still recover him from this state since its less serious but the tension would be palpable for a while.

mike is your number 1 wingman for steven swooning. he's kind of bad at being a wingman. or he's good at it. whichevers funnier in your opinion tbh. but he knows what steven likes ( at least he hopes he does ) so he gives you tips and tricks for wooing him. or he gives steven tips and tricks on wooing you because he knows both of you n hangs out with both enough to know.

this is a headcanon with basically no basis but theres a part of me that kind of likes steven and mike being born in johto or somethin'. which is why he goes to johto in doors open after the incident. he's running away from his past + kanto + it's his home region. At least for a while. so he sometimes likes to travel around with miki and you there, or to other places.

he double-checks a lot of things way too much. like if things are locked, if things are properly in place, and if wires are properly connected and not fucked up or tangled or broken ( iykyk ). if you check for him and reassure him everythings fine he'll calm down slightly, but his paranoia goes "okay but what if they didnt check enough."

if you told s!3v3n he was being a bad boy like a fucking dog when he does smth you dont like he probably would actually look like a dejected puppy for a moment and sit in a corner ( /j. maybe. )

s!3v3n's got big fuckin shadowy hands. and claws. good for backscratching or massages oddly enough, if asked for....????

steven will try to impress you by playing a videogame and doing something cool. he probably fails or almost fails at it. but its kind of endearing and cute anyways.

he's left-handed ( definitely not projecting ). for symmetry, mike is right-handed. also miki is ambidextrous. How can a Charizard be ambidextrous you ask? You know. For fun. Daisy is also ambidextrous though which is the more normal option.

i mean... steven is probably also ambidextrous with anything other than writing/drawing ( PROJECTING HARDER ).

ultimately kind of silly ( He has murdered three )

hope you enjoy :)

#wispy writes #steven strangled red #headcanons #ask

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kiatoru-archived · 5 months

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Hiiii- if possible can I ask for a letter from geto where he and the reader have a dynamic where they bicker and have playful banter? Rivals to lovers sort, but neither of them have confessed yet so they're stuck in the midst of being more than friends but not yet a couple! Just looking forward to a lot of teasing and joking around with each other (like they're bffs)

(I'll leave the specifics up to you!)

And btw it's completely fine if you don't wanna do the request (it's super vague I know :') )

Thanks anyways!

- 🌌✨ anon

of course! i tried to leave it as an ambigous confession if that makes sense 😭 ik this is super late so i hope you see it!

Dear Dork (<- haha),

Hey, how've you been? i know its been a while since we've talked, this mission is taking forever. Satoru is bugging me to get back to work and to stop writing to my partner (not that we're together... yet anyways) but I keep forgetting to call you back and I probably won't have the time to till we get back, so sorry.

anyways, this mission has been rough. I keep remembering right before satoru and i left the way you told Yaga off for sending us on these crazy missions haha, makes me laugh everytime. The look on his face when you called him out was priceless, honestly I'm laughing just thinking about it right now. you never do know when to shut up, huh? I guess it's part of your charm.

i don't really know what else to say. I miss you, it's been over a week since I've gotten to spar with you and kick your ass (haha). but it feels like its been forever since I've heard your voice :/ i know it sounds stupid but I've been watching those little videos you always take when you steal my phone. youre so cute its annoying. i'm taking you out when we get back, to that little coffee shop you love so much.

Until then,

love,

suguru <3

#PRAYING THAT YOU SEE THIS!!#i hope you like it hehe

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casspurrjoybell-28 · 11 months

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Alpha's Temptation - Chapter 24

*Warning Adult Content*

When I wake up to an empty bed, my heart drops, thinking I dreamt it all up.

I scramble out of the sheets, spotting a little note on the nightstand.

In a messy scrawl it reads: 'Had early morning call. See u later?' with a funny looking face scribbled next to it.

I find myself beaming as I pull out my phone to text Daemon, snapping a photo of the note and sending it to him.

Ash: You could have just texted me.

Almost immediately he starts typing in response.

Daemon: I could've. But I thought you'd like it, dork.

Ash: I do <3

I add the heart to my message with relish, smiling to myself all the while.

I remember that today I go back to school, so I jump up to get ready.

Actually being able to sleep for once has worked wonders on me.

I have never slept so soundly, without a nightmare before.

Except for maybe when I was little.

But I can't remember.

I pull out a cute striped knit sweater and skinny jeans, humming to myself as I get ready.

School is the usual stare and whisper show as usual.

Except for this time, it's not about what Henry did to me, it's about what I did to his brother.

Is it bad that I don't feel sorry?

Maybe that makes me a bad person.

I don't know.

I meet up with the gang at lunch and Lylah is static to see me, throwing her arms around me.

I hug her back tightly, glad to be back.

I apologize for being distant during my suspension.

I lie and say Lucien took my phone, not wanting to tell the truth, which is that I was too depressed to even pick up the device.

"I'm just glad you're back and not expelled," Lylah exclaims.

"It's all because Jay vouched for me," I look to said Alpha, giving him a look of appreciation. "Thanks again for doing that, even though I didn't really deserve it after what I... did."

"Agreed. Or I would've done it myself," Lylah proclaims, putting a hand over her chest as if she were doing to a pledge.

"Really?" I was worried they might think less of me.

"Yeah. You're badass, Ash," Jay winks at me.

"T-thanks" I reply, flustered.

Surely he's exaggerating.

I don't think what I did was that epic.

And now Lylah is making all sorts of teasing faces at me that Jay can't see and I just shake my head at her.

"Anyway," she clasps her hands together. "I dropped Jay's jersey off at your house. You got it, right?"

"You don't have to keep it, Ash," Jay immediately cuts in. "Not if it reminds you of..."

"No, no," I assure him. "I'll keep it. In your honor."

Lylah looks pleased with herself, a mischievous look on her face as she looks from me to Jay.

"Okay and can we talk about how you called Ash gorgeous at the game? Hmmm? Hmmm?" Lylah jabs Jay playfully in the side and he flushes, hiding his face from us.

"And how about how much you whined about Ash being gone these past two weeks?" she continues until Jay is putting a hand over her mouth to stop her.

She gleefully tries to squirm out of his grip.

I just laugh at their antics and my cheeks are already so sore from all the smiling I've been doing.

Lylah sure knows how to rile people up.

It seems her new hobby is trying to embarrass Jay in front of me.

I turn to Wren, who's been awfully quiet the entire lunch.

"Hey, you okay?" I ask him worriedly.

"Yeah. I'm just fine," he says, his tone flat.

I decide not to push it because he does not look happy whatsoever.

I look to Lylah for help but she's busy whacking Jay with her water bottle as he holds her school books out of reach.

I wish I knew how to reach out, to show Wren I'm here for him.

But he just seems so unreceptive right now.

*********

Today is my 18th birthday.

October 10th.

The day I was born.

The day I regret the most.

Okay, that was a bit dramatic.

As I wake up to the smell of coffee pancakes from downstairs I decide maybe I don't regret it too much.

I check my phone and see a flood of happy birthday texts from my friends and smile to myself.

Not one from Daemon, though.

My smile drops, kind of disappointed.

I mean, it's been better between us.

Definitely.

Not the usual fighting.

And he's been there for me.

But it's like we're in two different worlds.

I'm still in school and he's out on missions for Lucien, dealing with truces and rivalry with other packs.

I don't want him to see me as some annoying kid, whining for him to come see me.

With a sigh, I roll out of bed, padding downstairs to see Lucien's set the table lavishly with pancakes topped with powdered sugar and strawberries, syrup, bacon, scrambled eggs and a steaming cup of coffee.

"How's the birthday boy? Hungry, I hope," he chuckles, pulling out a chair for me to sit.

"Lucien. This looks amazing," I say in awe as I sit down.

I nearly start to tear up.

No one's celebrated my birthday in years.

My stepfather didn't even know the date of my birthday.

"Thank you so much," I gratefully smile at him as he ruffles my hair.

"My pleasure, bud. Let me go get your present," he leaves the room for a quick second, coming back with a pink box.

"Oh, you didn't have to..."

"Open it," he encourages me.

So I do, pulling open the box and taking out a cropped dark gray hoodie from Forever 21 that I have literally been wanting forever.

"Omg. I... how did you know?"

Lucien looks bit sheepish, scratching the back of his head.

"I may have had to get a little help from your friends."

I immediately pull it on, seeing it fits perfectly.

I spin in a circle for Lucien and he chuckles.

"It fits perfect," I exclaim.I give him a big hug.

"Thank you. This is the best present ever."

"I'm glad you like it. I was scared I might have gotten the wrong size or something. Rose was always better in the shopping department."

We finish breakfast happily and when I'm done suddenly I hear a car honk outside.

I run out to the porch to see Lylah, Wren and Jay all in her car together.

"Get in here cutie. We're taking you out," Lylah yells from the driver's seat.

"You guys..." I put a hand over my mouth in pleasant surprise.

I quickly rush upstairs to get my stuff and get ready, wearing my new hoodie and some black flare jeans.

My midriff is out so I'm a bit self-conscious but I decide that I should show off what I got.

Not that I have much... I quickly turn away from my mirror before I convince myself I look morphed and inhuman.

Which is what usually happens if I stare too long because my self perception and image are so distorted.

But today is a good day.

I can't let my low self-esteem ruin it.

I grab my phone and then head back downstairs.

"Have fun with your friends," Lucien sees me off and I tell him I will before eagerly rushing outside.

The first stop is thrifting because Lylah's absolutely obsessed with it and wants to set me up with some 'vintage' fits.

So she makes me try on all these crazy outfits while we take silly pictures together.

Jay sits on the designated 'boyfriend bench' as Lylah calls it, next to the fitting room as we do so, chatting with Wren about some rare Nike sneakers he's considering getting.

Wren is all smiles, pushing his hair behind his ear and laughing at all of Jay's jokes.

Awe, they look so cute together.

When we're finished, I only end up getting one pair of brown corduroy pants because Lylah insists on buying them for me since it's my birthday and I don't want to make her pay too much.

By that time it's early afternoon so Lylah says our next stop is the mall and that they have another surprise in store for me.

When we arrive at the small boutique I'm a bit confused and Lylah ushers me to a little booth in the corner of the store.

"So you know how you've been wanting to get your ears pierced? We thought you should do it today."

"Really? But isn't it expensive?" I ask worriedly.

"Not at all. I know the shop owner and she even gave me a discount. Consider it my gift to you," Wren assures me.

"Awe... That's so thoughtful of you," I hug him affectionately.

Then he helps me pick out some cute faux diamond earrings, ensuring I get the right size and material.

I look over as Lylah holds up some thick giant gold hoops to Jay's ear.

"He could totally rock these, couldn't he?" she asks us.

"Those look like they would tear my earlobes in half," Jay covers his ears protectively, moving away from her as we all laugh.

The process of getting my ears pierced is quick and nearly painless and after it's done I can't stop admiring the little jewel studs in my ears.

"I love them," I tell Wren and he grins bashfully.

I show Lylah and Jay excitedly.

"Material gwirl... what are you gonna get pierced next?" she asks, taking photos of me from every angle possible.

"Next? I just got these, silly."

"So that's a no to nipple piercings?" she raises her eyebrow and I gape at her, quickly looking around to make sure the employee didn't hear.

"Lylah," I whisper-yell at her.

"What? Y'all don't think Ash should get his nips pierced?" she looks to the other two.

Jay coughs abruptly, looking down to avoid the question.

Wren rolls his eyes.

"They don't do that here, weirdo."

"I wasn't serious."

Leaving them to their argument, Jay looks down at me, pushing my hair behind my ear for a better view of the earrings.

"It suits you," he says, a fond look in his eyes.

Lylah turns away from her quarrel with Wren, squealing as she starts snapping more photos of us and I wonder how she hasn't run out of storage space by now.

We hang around the mall for a bit longer until we're all hungry and we go to dinner.

Jay buys for us as my 'present' even though it's a serious battle to get past me and do that because I feel so bad about them paying for everything.

But Jay grabs the bill away from me, insisting and I eventually give in because he says he really wants to do this for me.

By the time we're done, I can't physically eat anymore so we don't order dessert.

They apologize for not being able to get me a cake and I say it's completely fine.

I mean I already had sweets this morning.

And I don't mind not following tradition.

I didn't even really know about how to celebrate birthdays until today.

And to be honest, the entire day has been so great that I find myself questioning if I deserve all this.

Then they drop me off at home and I thank them all for the wonderful time, telling them how much I love them.

I can't suppress the joy I feel, my heart is so full.

Even taking my medication at the scheduled time doesn't feel like a chore.

I look on my phone, hoping to see a text from Daemon but there's still nothing.

I mean it's not like I was expecting anything.

It's just a random day for him, not special just because it's my birthday.

So I put my phone down, telling myself to stop getting my hopes up and go take a shower.

When I get out I decide I'll watch something before bed.

As I'm about to turn a show on, I hear my phone ding with a message.

I dive for it, lighting up when I see the contact name on the screen.

Daemon: Come outside.

I waste no time pulling on some shoes and rushing downstairs, my heart nearly pounding out of my chest.

I can't believe he came.

If I wasn't happy before I'm nearly floating by now.

I open the front door to see him standing on the porch steps, adorned in a leather jacket and that familiar feeling of butterflies explodes in my stomach again.

It's obvious he's been out most of the day, his hair kind of messy but how does he still look so handsome?

It's making me so nervous.

"You came," I say.

"I didn't forget," he gives me a small smirk, pulling something out of his pocket.

A golden chain dangles from his hand.

"I uh, didn't have time to wrap it but... I made this for you," he says, almost sounding shy as he hands me it.

I take the necklace in my hands, spotting a little charm that hangs from it.

Upon closer observation, I see it's in the shape of the moon with ornate designs carved into it.

"You made this?"

I'm in awe, already feeling myself getting emotional.

He hand-crafted this for me?

'Me?'

"It's not much, I know. But I had some spare gold alloy and I thought you'd..."

By that time I'm already tearing up, letting out a little sniffle as I wipe my eyes.

Daemon's brow creases in worry.

"Do you not like it?" he asks, his expression falling.

"No, no, I love it," I clutch it to my heart. "It's perfect."

At that, a smile of relief breaks out on his face.

"Put it on for me?" I ask.

So he does, leaning in close and clasping it around my neck.

I breathe in shakily, trying to calm down.

I just can't believe he did this for me.

And I want to show him how much it means to me.

He's a step below me on the porch, so it evens out our height difference a little, though he's still taller.

"This is so sweet, Daemon," I tentatively reach out and pull him into a hug. "Thank you,"

"You're welcome, Omega," he replies teasingly, his arms wrapping around me.

I don't want to end this embrace.

I just want to stay like this forever.

And... I want Daemon to know that.

So I take a little risk. I lean in, giving him a little kiss on the cheek.

When I pull back, he's frozen, a blank look of shock on his face.

"B-bye Daemon," I stutter, starting to head back inside when he grabs my arm to stop me.

"Wait."

I look to him questioningly, wondering why but he doesn't say anything.

"I-I have to get back inside or Lucien will..."

"Right, uh..." Daemon's throat bobs and he looks a bit flustered, "Happy birthday, Ash."

"T-Thanks. And I'm gonna wear this every day. I'll treasure it. I promise."

I tell him as I rush back inside, too nervous to be around him any longer after what I just did.

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luimagines · 2 years

Note

Okokok not a request but I've just been thinking of a stupid scenario and I NEED to share it with someone or else I'm gonna forget

Imagine you're traveling with the chain, and maybe it's the beginning of the adventure, so you're not exactly close to anyone yet but there ha been a few lighthearted pranks here and there (and they were well received, even by members who you would think wouldn't like them)

And you guys stop in ruins for the night after a long day of traveling. Maybe it's an old temple, maybe it's just a random house that got left behind for time to take over. And you make a fire, and as the night is settling most of the group wander off, either to explore the ruins (within earshot range), to gather some herbs and food, or just to get some air.

So you're in this large room, and you think you're alone but then you see Twilight by the fire making sure it doesn't go out when no one is watching. And you think 'I haven't really had the time to bond with the guy. He seems approchable enough, I'll try a light prank I'm sure it'll go well :D'

So you pick up, let's say, a stick (so it's not dangerous) and you start being like "oh no!! Look!! It's the yiga attacking you with this very dangerous weapon right now!!!" And you poke him with the stick.

And the bastard just. Bites your hand. Like, one good chomp.

As a reflex.

Cuz Wolfie.

And he stays like this for like 10 whole seconds while he processes that he has a hand in his mouth, and he looks up to see who it's attached to and just sees you completely bewildered and a little bit horrified, because this well put together hunk of a hero just bit your hand.

He immediately let go and looks horrified, puts a hand over his mouth and just muffles "im so sorry" in the tiniest voice you could ever imagine and you just fucking crack because the whole thing is fucking ridiculous.

I mean it's kinda your fault, but also. Don't put random stuff in your mouth buddy. You dont know where they've been.

Anyway keeping it a secret from the rest of the group to save him the embarrassment is what gets you closer <3 (also you can blackmail him if he gets too annoying and with a group like this it's never too much)

Anyway hope you liked it, I needed to share this with someone before forgetting and I thought you might enjoy this ^^

❤🧡💛💚💙💜

I was saving this to reply with some thoughtful words and maybe add onto it.

But I just read it again to make sure I got the context right and remembering what this said and just..... I love this dork.

I can picture it so clearly. The red face. The horror. The squeak. The pregnant moment of silence before any of that where both of you process what the hell is happening.

I can't add more to it than there already is there. This is brilliant.

#pinky replies

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katsuriin · 4 years

Note

can i request headcanons with the third gym squad when they see their fem!s/o on a wedding dress like, she was helping the photography club by being a model, just pure fluff 👉👈

❥Tsukki, Akaashi, Kuroo and Bokuto seeing their fem!s/o in a wedding dress

wc: 0.7k

fem!reader

a/n: first anon request!! y'all are so good at coming up with ideas dang :') got a little short but I didn't want it to be repetitive sorry nonnie ^^' thank you for the req with some of my favourite dorks boys!! <3

you told him to wait for you at the gates after vb practice because you were staying behind to help a club and that's all he knew

so when he decided just to come and pick you up anyway he was practically speechless when he saw you in a floor length white gown

not that anyone could tell he was speechless because,,, he talks to like 3 people only

you hadn't noticed him yet but when you did you gave him the biggest, prettiest smile

boy was stuNNED OKAY HJHKH it was like a scene straight out of a shoujo manga or something like he wouldn't even have the capacity to make his sarcastic comments omG

you go to change but yk walking in heels and such a long dress is difficULT so you ask him to help you and this boy finally comes to is senses and blushes so lightly

you take his arm as you walk carefully to the changing room and his mind is going 100 miles per second because it literally looks like you both just got married jfjdfh

he wouldn't say much but when you're alone he'll stop you by the arm just to look at you in the stunning dress, you'll both stand there for a bit him just staring at you fondly hhh its so sweet kjdksjdks with this small smile on his face

the whole time you're blushing like crazy which makes him think you're even cuter if that's possible

hugs you for a while and give you smol kisses before letting you go

when you get distracted looking at your phone he'll definitely snap a couple of pictures real quick because your just sO pretty to him

baby is so so soft and it gives him a whole other type of domestic feels

like he knows you're both still young but it makes him think about a future with you in it and he loves the idea of it so much

seeing you in the dress definitely confirms his thoughts-he wants to spend the rest of his life with you 🥺🥺

he'd have to wait a little while for you to be finished but the whole time he would be staring at you with a soft smile

so tsukki would go kind of quiet right? akaashi would be the opposite

he would shower you with compliments the second you two are alone because baby is still a bit shy

"hm it suits you a lot" "you look very pretty" "I love you" "you should model more often [y/n]"

would be all soft and cute and would ask the photography club to send him a couple of the pictures when you've gone to change

bonus: you'd ask him to unzip the dress at the back and respectful king would do it then wait outside with his head against the cold window because you're going to be the deaTH of him

cocky little shit but you love him for it

"ah you didn't tell me we were getting married already"

your personal hype man oh my goD

would compliment you throughout the shoot making you smile so much

when the club leaves, he'll pull you in for a hug and literally be the softest baby ever

I'm talking about forehead kisses and whispered compliments

"you look so stunning baby"

mfer wouldn't even let you waLK when you go to get changed

literally picks you bridal style heh and takes you to the changing rooms

you both are just giggly happy messes and it definitely mirrors the situation you find yourself in 5 years down the line, if you get where I'm coming from 👀👀

literally in awe the whole time, the human version of the 🥺🥺 emoji

he'd be silent for like 5 minutes to process how pretty you look before loudly complimenting you for the rest of the session

"WOW YOU LOOK AMAZING [Y/N] !!!!!!"

would definitely pout when you have to take it off ksjdsjd

"WHY CAN'T YOU CARRY ON WEARING IT?" 'baby people will stare' "I'LL PUNCH THEM (ง •̀_•́)ง"

is like an overexcited puppy when is he not as he walks you home just complimenting you non stop before you cover his mouth in embarassment ghjhadhjhj

he definitely shows pictures from that shoot off to everyoNE and you apologise to the vb team after practice the following day because of it fjdfjd

they all find it hella endearing though even if they don't admit it

bonus: would propose wedding dress shopping as a date even though you're both third years sjhsj "but you suit them so much 🥺🥺"

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zuffer-weird-girl · 5 years

Text

*me remembering that I promised a scenario of a drunk Chisaki* oH FUC-!

One or three bottles of sake

You were simply messing around in your phone, snickering at seing other people do shit on the internet before you heard a knock... which is weird since you were in the living room... not the bedroom.

"Excuse me? (Y/n)-sama?" The man asked hushed while you giggled at his exaggerate manners.

"Tengai I told you already about the formalities!" You smiled and put your phone down to look at the man "Just call me by my name, really is okay!"

"I apologize for this." The huffed a smile while scratching the back of his neck before returning to a serious expression "Pardon about bothering you in such a hour at the night... but could you accompany me please?"

You nodded and followed the calm man through the halls.

"Something wrong?" Tengai sigjed loudly before scracthing the back of his head again.

"Sadly. You see, the eight precepts, Chrono and Mimic were reunited on a room and that thug Rappa just brought along with Deidoro some alcohol drinks... To celebrate or just drink the night off or something similiar."

You snickered a bit, gulping down immediately after Tengai arched his eyebrow at you before returning to his explanation.

"Anyway. I refused since I'm not much a fan of alcohol in general. But the rest was the opposite... Master Overhaul got them on the act and went to stop that nonsense before Rappa just made one mistake..."

You started to grow worried before Tengai opened one door to reveal a bunch of drunk mens while you saw your boyfriend.... chugging and hitting the cup on teh cofee table as Chrono and Mimic shouted 'TAKE THAT' at a screaming Rappa.

You blinked once before looking at Tengai with wide eyes while pointing in disbelief at the scene in front of you.

"Yes... Rappa spoke something about master 'being a wimp on drinks or something, how would you be dissapointed at seing that your man didn't take one drink and that what type of yakusa boss he was if he didn't even could drink a cup of saque."

You returned your look at Chisaki who had the same stoic face as usual but the difference it was that his golden eyes were puffy and his uncovered cheeks were slightly pink.

"H-How much..?" You asked, giggling about at the way Chisaki miserably tried to slap Chrono's hand away form his back.

"When I left it was already gone one bottle... now?" He looked at the pile of empty bottles "I am afraid to know."

Suddenly Mimic snickered and while looking at you both extending his arms.

"Look at who decided to fucking join us! tEnGAI BiTcH GEt YoUR AsS DoWN AnD GeT DrUnK As WeLL!"

"I'll pass..." Tengai growled before glaring at Rappa for shouting that he was being a wimp.

"FinE ParTy BooMEr! (Y/N)! Go SiT YoUR AsS doWn thEn By OvErHaUL's SiDE anD FuCkInG DrInk!"

At the mention of your name the eyes of your lover widen just a bit before he drubkly looked up at his front... you were at his side...

"(Y/n)..? Wh..where the fuck is her?" He muttered while Deidoro left out a drunk laugh as he falled into his back at the ground.

"THE BOSS IS REALLY FUCKING DRUNK!"

"Tell the time then fucker." Setsuno snickered before juggling his cup.

"SHUt up midget!" Deidoro lifted up and pointed at a clock in the wall and screamed at it "THE BOSS IS REALLY FUCKING DRUNK!"

Hoyo spitted om his drink by his laughter while Chrono stood, a bit trembling, on his feet and cane to you.

"We fucked up.. sorry." He half smirked before almost dropping before you helped him out.

"For crying out loud how many drinks did you all had?!" You whispered shouted while Chrono showed one finger while muttering a 'bottle'.

And... everyone wasn't much different... excluding Chisaki who somehow was still searching for you and surprisingly didn't found it.

"Mimic you fucking liar, my angel isn't here." He growled before grunting when he just bumped his forehead on the table.

"Am FuCKInG NoT! THe ChiCk Is RighT TheRe!" Mimic pointed angrily at you while you could only deadpan.

"Alright." You started, accidentaly letting Kurono fall.. he at least made a thumbs up to tell you he was alright when you yelped "Everyone. Out. Night time for all of you."

You were so grateful that you had the respect of those man, or else it would probably take AGES for them to listened to you...

You stopped Nemoto though, being one of the last to leave, and pointed at Chisaki... lost look as he stared at his front.

"How many did he had Nemoto?"

"About (hic) three bottles. Rappa challenged him so..(hic) you knwo how master is."

You sigjjed and thanked the man, slowly going into his side to bring a hand to touch his shoulder before he slapped it away.

"Don't touch me filth... only one person can do that and is not fucking you so out." He mumbled, still not looking at you as he tried to get up... tried.

"Uh? Who?"

"Not your fucking business but is my (Y/n)." He growled before hiccupping "The sweetest and the most beautiful thing on this sick world and my angel is the fucking bes-" he tripped on his own foot and dropped to his knees with a hiss.

You blushed at his words... normally drunk people werent on their right mind but they never spoke lies... especially your Chisaki. You knew how he was reserved but those sweet words he almost never let out.

"I am all that?" He looked up to send you a glare before widening his eyes at sieng your blushing and smiling figurine.

"Angel..." he smiled a bit, surprisingly standing up and accepting your help "Since when you're here?"

"Not too long. Why?"

"I was going to kill some filth shit in this room.. but is all gone because you're here.." he sluttered before dropping his head on teh crook of your neck "My angel is the best..." he cooed before nuzzling his face into your neck.

Oh god what was happening?! Was this what too much of alcohol did to your boyfriend?!

He grunted a bit before mumbling in your skin.

"You're not hugging me back (Y/n).. did I do something?" You went to look at him befor eyou noice he was POUTING.

CHISAKI KAI. OVERHAUL. LEADER OF THE YAKUSA. IS POUTING. AND IT WAS ADORABLE.

"No no!" You immediate answered, waving your hands a bit "I-Is just tha-"

He grabbed your hand weekly and kissed your palm before nuzzling his face on it.

Dear lord what was happening with him?!

"My angel..." he cooed in your hand before hugging you again "I missed you..." he said a bit more sleepy while your heart was almost combusting at this overwhelming event.

"U-uh.. K-Kai how about some water then we can go to bed?"

He nodded in your neck, grunting in disaproval at losing his warmth and just blindly following you through the house... at least he had his hand on yours.

Pops was just getting to his room before he spotted you two.

"Good night you two." He smiled at your gretting but frowned at sieng his successor "Chisaki my boy, are you alright? You look a bit.. flustered?"

Chisaaki let out a chuckle before wrapping his arms around your waist and rubbing his cheek on yours, you with wide eyes and face burning form embarrassment.

"Nothing. Just my (Y/n) giving me her warmth... my angel is so warm..." he buries his nose, missing the wide eyes of his father figurine and his lover looking at him in shock "I just love it since I'm always so cold and is also soft..." he sighed in bliss at finding some comfortable position and just remained like that.

You gagged before looking at Pops, same wide eyes as you had on that moment while looking back at you.

He pointed a finger to your boyfriend and you sighed in defeat.

"Saque. 3 bottles." The elder arched a eyebrow before returning to see Chisaki nuzzling even more his nose on your neck and burring right in your ear.

"Well. What alcohol does with a man.." he smirked a bit at seing his adopted son attempting to growl at seing that your attention wasn't on him "Think you can take care of my boy for the night (Y/n)?"

"I'll try my best." You giggled, replying the good night Pops gave to you and smilling like a dork when Chisaki said something with the word 'father' on it.

"Alright my devil. Let's get you to bed." He grunted before tightening his hold on you.

"I'm not a infant (Y/n)..." he muttered but complied anyway while following you to his room.

He took the seat down with a yawn and hic up before he smirked dreamily when you helped him on taking off his shirt.

"Naughty little angel we have..."

"Ahaha.. no mister. You're way too drunk." You laughes and mockingly pointed at finger at his nose.

Although you yelped a bit at the nibble he manage to do in your finger.

"Kai!" He smirked devilish back at the call of his name before you giggled and rolled your eyes, going to the bathroom for wash your face before you felt a tug in you clothing.

"Wh.. where are you going?" You went to answer but the way his voice sounded so.. broken and fearful made you worry "Don't.. don't leave me alone angel.. please?"

"I was only going to wash my face to go to bed Kai..." you stopped in your tracks to carress his face with your thumbs "How could I leave you for real anyway?"

"You should." He hiccuped, eyes darkening a bit "Because I'm fucked up."

"No you're not!"

"I am.. like.. you-you're just the pool of sweetest and brightness" he pointed at you with his pam before plopping down "Then we have this demon here, the total opposite of you... but I am selfish.." he muttered the last part before burring in your stomach.

"I want you with me... only with me..." he juzzled in hour tummy before looking up at you. "Promise..."

"Promise what my devil?"

"Promise that you wont leave me in the dirty like some people did already.."

You made a hurt face before carresing his looks, giggling at the vibrations that the pleased sounds he made were making shivers crawl down your spine.

He suddenly groaned, burrowing his face even more on you while you poked him and ask what happened.

"Fuck that piece of shit Rappa now tommorow I'm going to have a headache... fuuuucck i wanna kill him.."

You giggle, hoping that tommorow his hangover wasn't going to be that painful...

#overhaul x reader #overhaul scenario #fanfic overhaul #overhaul #chisaki kai imagine scenario #kai chisaki x reader #chisaki kai x reader #kai chisaki #chisaki kai #bnha imagine #bnha x reader #bnha characters #bnha villains #bnha #my writing #zuffer writings

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omglr · 5 years

Conversation

dumb as bricks dude

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You both like feminism.

Stranger: hi

You: hi

Stranger: asl

You: 32 F

Stranger: m 22 canada

You: cool, i am also in canada

Stranger: Vancouver

You: Toronto

Stranger: cool

Stranger: Feminist?

You: yes

You: you?

Stranger: im a man so... DUH.. NO

You: kurt cobain was a feminist

Stranger: never knew that

Stranger: our retard PM is a feminist.

You: eh... is he though?

Stranger: claims to be but hes useless regardless

You: yeah

Stranger: so why are you a sexist?

You: lol

You: in what way?

Stranger: feminism is hatred of men

You: i like kurt cobain

Stranger: hes dead

You: yeah, he was good dude though

Stranger: yeah.. but feminist men are pathetic

You: mmmmeh

You: it kinda sounds like you're the one who is sexist?

Stranger: how so?

You: cause you think that feminism is about the hatred of men, and that men who are feminists aren't manly enough

Stranger: exactly

You: and that says something about how much you value women

Stranger: feminism is about female superiority and any man who supports it needs to grow a pair of balls and realize hes the superior one

Stranger: I dont value women.

You: yeah

You: so you are sexist

Stranger: and women dont value men so...

You: mmmm, that's also pretty obviously wrong

Stranger: sure

Stranger: lets say a woman has a boyfriend.

then she meets a better looking, stronger richer man whos showing interest in her, shes dumping the current BF for the new guy.

You: women rarely value sexist men, so maybe you just didn't recognize that your attitude was effecting how people treat you and creating a feedback loop

Stranger: LOL I avoid women now

You: yeah, maybe you need to get a hobby?

Stranger: I have hobbies

Stranger: I've had 3 girlfriends, and guess what

You: are you MTGOW now?

Stranger: yeah.

Stranger: its freedom

You: have you considered castration?

Stranger: why...

You: that's freedom from sexual needs

Stranger: I can jerk off

You: focus on playing the chello or whatever

Stranger: sure

Stranger: if women were not so shallow and heartless I wouldnt be MGTOW

You: i think that's the self fulfilling prophesy speaking

Stranger: well, im not good looking, im not 6'2 and I dont make $100K a year after taxes, im of no interest to a woman .

You: you're 22 though

Stranger: I know. and?

You: dudes still look like teenagers at that point

You: at like 35 you're probably gonna look pretty good

Stranger: not really, people have guess that im 30...

You: eh, i mean, it just seems like you are giving up too early and getting advice from other dudes who also gave up

Stranger: I gave up 3 years ago

You: you are gonna let a teenager tell you how to live?

Stranger: no

Stranger: I decide how I live

You: yeah but its never to late to change directions

Stranger: also, my dream job is bus driver, I cant say how it is at the TTC, but here, the pay is awesome, the benefits are great, the pension is fat, once im older and driving a bus women will probably want me, but not for me, for the perks that come from being with me, the fat pay checks, the family benefits etc

You: yeah that sounds good

You: go for it

Stranger: yeah, so, sorry girls, im not interested in you.

You: its ok not to be interested in girls

Stranger: im not gay

Stranger: im just not a betabux

You: it is a bit weird to think women are mostly interested in money though

Stranger: but its the truth

You: like, women are interested in feeling secure

Stranger: because god forbid she has to work to support herself

You: and couples who are financially insecure tend to have a hard time unless they work together

Stranger: ok

You: like most women have goals and shit they want to do with their lives, no body is really expecting to be a stay at home mom in this economy

Stranger: i know

Stranger: but they want a man to get the money to pay the bills while her money goes for fun stuff

You: i've never been in a relationship like that

Stranger: then you've never been married

You: i have been married

You: have you?

Stranger: FUCK NO

Stranger: why would I do that?

You: it just seems like you were speaking from some authority

Stranger: I know what a marriage is like

You: how?

Stranger: by listening to other men

Stranger: its bullshit, nothing but being controlled by a wife

You: lol, ok

You: those dudes probably shouldn't be married

Stranger: and she'll get bored and cheat sooner or later

You: did your parents get divorced?

Stranger: never married

You: where they partners?

You: were^

Stranger: they were dating.

Stranger: Anyway the 3 girlfriends i had were nothing but lying whores

You: and this was before you were 19?

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: your point?

You: teenagers are dipshits

Stranger: sure

You: and treat eachother terribly

Stranger: thats odd, I treated them fine, I guess im just smarter than they are

You: mmmm, maybe

Stranger: obviously

You: you sound pretty arrogant though

Stranger: oh well

Stranger: women need to learn how to respect men and how to treat a BF

You: ehhhhhh ok, what do men need to do?

Stranger: nothing, they are fine

You: how come their needs aren't being met then?

Stranger: because women dont value men

You: perhaps...

You: but maybe its because men need to learn how to communicate?

Stranger: nope

Stranger: woman -is mad-

man "are you ok"

woman- still mad- "im fine"

but men cant communicate... ok then

You: like the men who are married and being controlled by their wives and are expected to pay the bills and shit

Stranger: its either that or get divorced and pay alimony and child support

You: could have had conversations with their partners about responcibilities

Stranger: LOL a woman taking equal responsibility

You: eh, unpaid labour is often taken for granted by dudes

Stranger: aww, did she make dinner?

You: shrug, i don't know, I'm giving you a lot here

You: but its boring me,

Stranger: well women are boring

You: like, you can keep repeating sexist shit until you die alone and unloved

You: like, i don't care, really

Stranger: im not good looking, im not worth of love

You: dude your self esteem is bonkers

You: stop listening to men who tell you shit like that

Stranger: but they are right

You: stop listening to women who tell you shit like that

Stranger: but women know what women like

You: focus on your bus goal, read some fiction by diverse authors, take a fucking pottery class, stay off incel and mgtow message boards

Stranger: but MGTOW and Incel is the truth

Stranger: I am an incel

You: get your shit together, drop your shit attitude and stereotype nonsense, and change your stupid life

Stranger: nah

Stranger: I live the truth

You: next time i'm in vancouver I'm gonna slap the shit out of any busdrivers over 6 feet

Stranger: have fun judging their height when they are sitting, plus any new buses purchased after 2018 have a driver barrier

You: they all take smoke breaks

Stranger: no

You: ok, well, i'm not actually going to, i forgot what the point of that comment was

Stranger: lol

Stranger: I'll be too busy driving to have a relationship

You: maybe go see a dominatrix or something where the value exchange of sex for money is clear and you don't have to get all resentful about it

Stranger: nah, I like keeping my money

You: mmmm you ever go on rollercoasters?

Stranger: long ago

You: you ever go for a fancy dinner or a 3d movie?

Stranger: no and yes

You: back massage or dentist appointment?

Stranger: no

You: yeah, 22 and you haven't seen a dentist?

Stranger: well long ago

You: before you had to pay for it?

Stranger: yeah

You: you still got your wisdom teeth?

Stranger: nope

You: lol, lucky you have a mom to take care of your teeth

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: Anyway when im driving a bus I wont have time for dating

You: oh yeah?

Stranger: yah

Stranger: there is so much available OT to do so when will I have time to try (and fail) to get a girl

You: when you are walking your dog in the park

You: like a responsible adult

Stranger: I dont care for pets

You: ok, well, i've spent a lot of time here trying to problem solve your stupid shit, do you have any questions about feminism?

Stranger: why is feminism even needed?

You: to fight for the rights of the marginalized and prevent social regression

Stranger: sounds BS

You: meh

You: its pretty awesome honestly

Stranger: not its not

Stranger: women are not oppressed, they are just greedy and demanding

You: lol, but imagine their was a mgtow/incel support group for woman

Stranger: nope

You: except not shitty

Stranger: sure

Stranger: dating is shit

You: https://www.mmiwg-ffada.ca/

Stranger: what is that?

You: website for missing and murdered indigenous women and girls

Stranger: dont care

You: ok, so you don't care about the parts of society where women are oppressed

Stranger: nope

You: no wonder you didn'

You: t notice

Stranger: ever seen a homeless man?

You: yeah dude

Stranger: "oppressed" men

You: capitalism man and conservative pollitics man

Stranger: ok?

You: socialist feminism is about getting the needs of homeless men met

Stranger: nope

Stranger: socialism is bullshit

You: lol

You: but a workers union for bus drivers?

Stranger: yes

You: bs or no?

Stranger: nope

You: welcome to the labour movement

Stranger: socialism is bullshit.

You: its fuckin socialism

Stranger: "free" "free "free"

You: you dork

Stranger: "Socialism cause I dont want to work, I want it free, paid for by those who do work"

You: you don't actually know shit about it

Stranger: sure

Stranger: lets raise taxes for the rich so you dont have to pay for shit

You: mmmm, well that doesn't sound too bad

You: are you rich?

Stranger: nope

Stranger: you know why those people are rich?

You: exploiting the working class

Stranger: nope, working hard

You: no dude, they extract value from the work and pay them as little as possible

Stranger: well, get a new job, maybe a union job, they pay more

Stranger: stop being lazy

You: lol, dude, if you don't want your boss to exploit you and take 95% of the value created by you working your ass off, guess what helps with that?

You: fucking forming a union

You: fucking socialism

Stranger: yeah, but not socialist bullshit

Stranger: "boo hoo, I have to work hard boo hoo"

You: UNIONS ARE SOCIALIST

Stranger: nope

You: lol, ok

You: tell that to the guys when you are applying for your union job

Stranger: I will enjoy my union job

You: and you'll be an ignorant hipocrit

Stranger: I'll be richer than you simply by working.

You: lol,

You: jesus

Stranger: so stop being a crybaby and get a job

You: i have a job, and i'm in a union

You: but i know what i'm talking about

You: i'm not regurgitating capitalist bullshit

Stranger: no you dont, you seem to think those who work harder than you should pay for your stuff

You: lol dude

Stranger: what

You: i don't know where to start

You: you are just really thick

Stranger: nope, just smarter than you

You: ok, so remember how you had your mom pay for your dental care

Stranger: yeah

You: remember how your teeth are growing out of your skull

Stranger: yeah...

Stranger: get on with it idiot

You: and how if you had head trauma you could get free health care at a hospital

Stranger: GET ON WITH YOUR POINT IDIOT

You: but if you have a tooth problem you have you pay hundreds of dollars

Stranger: whats your fucking point moron

You: dentistry could be socialized like the rest of healthcare

You: and it would be better for society

Stranger: "boo hoo, I dont wanna pay when I have too, boo hoo

Stranger: "

Stranger: "make it free cause I dont wanna pay, wwwaaaaa"

You: and it wouldnt cost people much and it would imrpove the quality of life of lots of people

Stranger: sure

You: that's the kind of free shit socialists want

You: not Ipods

Stranger: sure

You: although, with the savings... you could buy an ipod

You: but then apple would also get taxed properly

Stranger: they want free college, higher taxes for those who work so social assistance rates can be raised for those who cant be bothered to work

You: and pay for dentistry....

Stranger: aww, did you have to pay a bill like an adult?

You: dude, you already said you have never paid a dentist bill in your life

Stranger: but did you

You: yeah I'm 32

Stranger: yeah but you act like a child

You: dude you don't even understand taxes

Stranger: i do

You: yeah, you are worried that your taxes which you pay for will be used for something usefull for society

Stranger: but I' be paying MORE taxes, I dont want that

You: and you are worried that people who make millions of dollars more than you are going to have to pay more

You: progressive taxation doesn't work like that

Stranger: well, they earned it why should they have to pay more?

You: because they have extracted that value from the world, and that's what taxes are, for taking care of the world

Stranger: sure

You: yeah

Stranger: im not intrested in your bs

You: lol

You: i mean, you're a piece of work buddy

Stranger: thanks

You: i mean, you've got a lot of growing up to do

Stranger: I could care less what a socialist loser thinks

Stranger: I worked for it, its fucking mine

You: lol

You: jesus, ok

You: lets start over

Stranger: you want it? work harder

You: "I worked for it, it's fucking mine"

Stranger: yeah

You: yeah

You: agreed

Stranger: so you want something? work harder and earn it, dont expect someone else to pay for it

You: you get hired for a job flipping burgers

Stranger: no thanks, I can do better than that

You: you work 9 hour shifts, and cook 300 burgers an hour

Stranger: is that your job?

You: you get paid, 12 dollars

You: no i'm an electrician

Stranger: then why do those shit jobs matter?

You: but this person gets paid 12 dollars for making 300 burgers sold for an average of $4 each

Stranger: your point is?

You: they process the food that made the company $1200

Stranger: ok and?

You: and got paid 1%

Stranger: your point is?

You: the $1200, I WORKED FOR IT, I PRODUCED IT, ITS FUCKING MINE

Stranger: nope

Stranger: you get paid $12 per hour worked, not per item cooked

You: yeah dude its the same shit, you are worried about the people who took 99% of the wealth from a shit job employee having to pay more taxes and give poor people dental care

Stranger: if they want to get paid more go get a higher skilled job than flipping burgers and salting fries

You: it can be a fucking hard job

You: like, seriously watch a fast food employee next time you are in one

You: they are always having to do shit

Stranger: I did, she was cute and bent over

You: yeah, you should have paid her for that

Stranger: nope

You: you stole a look

Stranger: paid her to pick up trash from the floor? I believe the company pays her for that

You: again, the wealthy will pay their employees as little as they legally can, and keep as much money as they can and pay as little taxes as they can

Stranger: oh

Stranger: well

Stranger: get a higher paying job?

You: and you think that these people are working harder

Stranger: there is no skill in burger flipping

You: when they are just working hard enough to exploit resources of other people and hoard wealth

Stranger: sure

You: so yeah, burger flipping is a job that is grueling and bullshit and annoying

Stranger: well, get a new one

You: but the metaphor is applicable to most jobs

Stranger: sure

You: you figure out how much the company is making off of you, and you realize it is a lot more than they are paying you and they should be respecting you a lot more for doing your job well

You: that's why unions are fucking awesome

You: because they can protect you from exploitation, get you better wages and services

You: and fight for you if you are wronged

Stranger: yeah, so those burger flippers can go get a new union job

You: the burger flippers can also start a union, but mcdonalds is pretty keen on union busting

Stranger: I've had to repeat my order to some of the morons working there and sometimes they still cant get it right, so why should they be paid more?

You: again, you don't have to focus on burgers,

You: like, shit man

Stranger: oh well

You: anyway, your bus job sounds cool and i hope it treats you well and you learn from your coworkers what the union is doing for you

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: because I have the high skill required to drive a bus, I will be paid more than a no skilled worker in a store or Mcdicks

You: i mean... some would try to say that driving a bus doesn't take much skill at all

Stranger: explain to me how to do a right turn while driving a bus,

You: like it's basically sitting on a couch

Stranger: sure.

You: i mean, what goes on a double mcRib, no L, ex P,

Stranger: dont know, dont care

You: yeah, dude people undervalue the labour of workers

Stranger: sure

Stranger: "duuurr I put cheese on a burger"

You: "I made 600 burgers today, and some shithead started screaming at me for getting onions when he asked for no ketchup"

Stranger: well, do your job right

You: lol, show some compassion and empathy in every aspect of your life

Stranger: nah

You: yeah, dude

Stranger: if they cant figure out what "no ketchup" is they are not too bright

You: i think you missed the part where the guy didn't ask for no onions

You: he only asked for no ketchup

Stranger: oh well I dont care

Stranger: get a better job

Stranger: I've seen quite a few downright useless fast food workers, so tell me why they are worth more than $12 an hour?

You: your anecdotal evidence is as flawed in observations of fast food employees as it is with women

Stranger: sure

You: you have no empathy and only think about yourself

You: you are short sighted, ignorant and arrogant

Stranger: I had to repeat my order of "2 double cheese burgers and 1 regular sized M&M Mcflurry " 3 times

Stranger: only to get slow service and an oreo Mcflurry

You: yeah dude, i had to repeat unions are socialism like 5 times and you still don't understand

Stranger: but unions are not socialism you fuckward

Stranger: if you want to get paid more EARN IT

You: fuckin' you want me to crack open wikipedia

Stranger: dont care

Stranger: I dont care what some socialist moron thinks

Stranger: burger flippers are skilless, so they get low paid

You: ok, but you understand the central theme though right?

Stranger: high skill= high pay

low skill = low pay

You: a burger flipper does a variety of tasks for 8 hours a day and gets paid 1% of the value they produce, or less

Stranger: burger flipper has no usefull skills

You: YOU EAT THE FOOD DIPSHIT

Stranger: and?

You: THEY MADE THE FOOD FOR YOU!

Stranger: making food isnt hard

You: YOU DIDN"T MAKE THE FOOD AND YOU GOT FOOD

Stranger: they are paid to make the food

Stranger: I bought the food

You: ok, so you paid a company 99% for them to exploit a worker tyo make you a burger

Stranger: yeah, so what

Stranger: why do you even care? its not your job

You: we move up, and look at the day shift managers, the night shift managers, they get paid quite a bit more than the employees but aren't working much harder

Stranger: managers are overpaid slackers

You: they might actually be working less hard

You: yeah, and above them, managers of the local franchises, and up ward and upward to a ceo who is perhaps having a meeting once a day? and getting paid how much more than their lowest employee

Stranger: oh well\

Stranger: I dont care about the useless burger flipper

You: again, its not burgers, its everthing

You: its you right now

You: you don't even have this kushy bus job

You: with union support

You: you are probably unemployed

Stranger: you realize their job is pretty much

cooking food

taking out trash

sweeping the floor,

stuff you do at home, its simple shit

Stranger: I have a union job

You: what is your job?

Stranger: loading trucks

You: and that takes how much skill?

Stranger: a fair amount

You: in what way?

Stranger: gotta load 4 trucks, sort it according to the load sort, keep up with the pace of freight coming to you

You: but anyone with muscles could do it?

Stranger: if your loading a company truck keep count of the number of stops, if its owner op dont count it

Stranger: muscles and a brain

You: ok

Stranger: harder work than burger flippers

You: i mean, I was gonna scrutinize it further to make the point that your job seems pretty simple but you have lots of insider knowledge about the challenges of the job to say otherwise

Stranger: exactly

You: it could be argued that it is an unskilled labour possition though

Stranger: harder job thus for higher pay

You: maybe, or a labour rights movement that had your back

Stranger: no the unskilled is unloading trailers, all it takes it watch your head, watch out for the guy your with and put the labels facing up onto the conveyor

Stranger: still not socialism you idiot

You: i mean, i don't need to argue that rain is wet

You: you can deny it if you want

Stranger: nah

You: you can even call me an idiot for saying the rain is wet

Stranger: your dumb enough to think the morons at fast food deserve higher pay so I cant take you seriously

You: but it only reflects on your arrogance

Stranger: sure

Stranger: "2 double cheese burgers and an M&M Mcflurry"

I had to repeat it 3 times and they still couldnt get the order right.

but you think they should be paid more?

You: i guess should have picked a better metaphor

You: you are really hung up on that eh?

Stranger: its an example to prove you wrong

Stranger: picking up an empty cup from the floor is so hard, oh poor girl

You: it proves nothing really

You: except that you hate poor people

Stranger: it proves they are not worth more than min wage

You: and that they deserve worse treatment than wealthy people

Stranger: no, they just need to work harder to get higher pay

Stranger: also whens the last time you were in any fast food place?

You: and that caring about the needs of the marginalized and downtrodden is outside of your wheelhouse, and that you should eat shit and die alone

You: simple as that

You: fuck off

You: and die

Stranger: lol guess what

You: mgtow to hell

Stranger: I used to be homeless

You: yeah, sounds made up

Stranger: well its not

Stranger: you see, I did what was needed to get off the street, finish school and get a job

You: and you have internalized all sorts of capitalist bullshit along the way

Stranger: so what

Stranger: hard work is all you need

Stranger: get a skill

You: lol

Stranger: why are bus drivers paid so much?

high skilled job

gotta deal with shitty people sometimes

You: you're still pretty thick

Stranger: also, since you dodged my question, most fast food workers are high schoolers anyway, so who cares if they make min wage, most of that money is just blown when they hang out with friends anyway

You: ok, but that's not actually true

You: most fast food employees are between 28 an 40

Stranger: odd. I was in Mcdonalds today, the oldest guy there looked 20

Stranger: hmm, then how come I've seen people from my old highschool working there? they were a grade or two below me as well...

You: cause of the neighborhood you live in doesn't represent the majority of fastfood service jobs?

Stranger: I've been to quite a few and its all highschool looking kids workin there

You: and so you know a lot of workers who are 18-20 but that doesn't actually mean that's the average

You: https://groundswell.org/fast-food-misconceptions/

Stranger: want higher pay? get hire skill

You: 40 percent of the workforce in the fast food industry is 25 or older, and the average fast-food worker is 29 years old.

Stranger: get a skill

Stranger: https://www.monster.com/career-advice/article/best-paid-job-skills

You: but also, tax the rich and give services to poor people

Stranger: so tax those who work hard and have skills to pay for things for people who are lazy and have no skill.

Stranger: https://www.marketwatch.com/story/these-10-skills-you-need-to-earn-higher-wages-may-surprise-you-2017-04-18

You: alright lazy brain, i gotta go to bed

You: got work in the morning

You: gotta put these skills to work

Stranger: get a skill to get higher pay

Stranger: dont want to flip burgers? get a skill

You: dude I'm an electrician

Stranger: exactly, so your paid more than a burger flipper cause your usefull

You: not everyone can do this work, we need a diversity of workers doing all sorts of shit

Stranger: there are plenty of skilled jobs

You: you're dumb as bricks but you are getting paid decent with your loading job

Stranger: yeah, because its skill

Stranger: and im not dumb as bricks.

You: i want a society that takes care of you even though personally I hope boxes crush your legs and a woman shits in your mouth

Stranger: lol

Stranger: see, your so bitter

Stranger: you cant accept that not everyone agrees with you and you freak out

You: yeah, its just cause you are 22, a bitter misogynist and unable to process new information

Stranger: I have processed it

Stranger: and its bullshit

Stranger: you dont get high pay for low skill

You: eh... your bs assessment skills are weeeeeek

Stranger: everyone knows that to get high pay you gotta work hard

Stranger: take from those who work to give to those who dont, your fucked in the head

You: aight duder

You: eat shitbricks

You have disconnected.

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