#anymore and i don't do unmasked indoor stuff and every outing requires so many checks and balances for me to do and it's just hard
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i gotta say. it is getting so damn hard as a disabled trans+queer jew with a shitty immune system to not feel completely overwhelmed w/ sadness and dread at every moment i'm sure a lot of yall feel the same but like man. idk how any of us are dealing with it at this point
#s.txt#it's just so... it feels like every part of who i am is under attack rn yk? and obv this is not a unique experience by any means#but everywhere i turn there's just such blatent antisemitism and dogwhistles and eugenics wherever i turn and i feel like i'm losing my min#and i'm missing pride again bc i super can't risk covid again and no one fucking gets it besides nat#but like!!! g-d it's so hard!!!#and i've had two different friends reach out to me this week being like i miss you and i'm like!! i miss you too but you don't really mask–#anymore and i don't do unmasked indoor stuff and every outing requires so many checks and balances for me to do and it's just hard#not to mention the guilt i have for like. not being there when things are under attack! it feels like i've abandoned my family#but like. in a lot of ways i've been abandoned first bc things are just not safe for me to participate in yk??#this is the longest rant i'm so sorry g-d#i'm going through it and i just really need something good to happen for me like PLEASE#i'll take a single thing skjdhks#chronic illness stuff
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