#and yea sure i wont pull jerma level views - which fair enough - but also like. considering the short amount of time i've been on twitch?
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anyone else ever get sad that they have so much potential to do some really good shit but small things are holding them back? bc thats how im feeling rn tbh
#ngl my streams have me feeling Some Shit from time to time#and then my stepdad brought up one of his workmates making 1000s off of streaming and it's like. ok#like i appreciate learning that but now it just kinda feels like im doing shit wrong#and i understand my setup is scuffed as hell and i cant do anything abt it but i just............ EHHHHHH#also to clarify: this isnt abt the money thing#its more abt how the fact i dont make as much money off streaming would be seen as just a useless timewaster#rather than smth i genuinely enjoy doing that makes me happy and feel like i have a purpose in life to make other people happy#idk it just kinda sucks tbh like if im not making bank off of streaming im just not gonna get any encouragement from my family to keep going#and it feels weird bc like. i dont wanna stop bc I Know i can do well with my streams#and yea sure i wont pull jerma level views - which fair enough - but also like. considering the short amount of time i've been on twitch?#i'm doing pretty damn well esp for what standards i had for myself#like i was convinced i wasnt gonna get above like. 10 and now im at 246 and am an affiliate like??#that's pretty good and the fact i even got there in the first place is fucking miraculous#and i dont wanna fuck it up by having people talk me out of it bc they dont believe in me#but yeah idk i think the fact that i could Be More is just kinda. idk it feels bad
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