#and was like 'please don't tell my friends this is my first time'

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Hey. Hi. Hello. Today I learned about the existence of 15th century Welsh poet Gwerful Mechain and that she apparently has a surviving work of erotic poems.

Please. For Christmas. For Yule. Please tell me more because I can't read Welsh.

Heh heh. Oh, Gwerful Mechain is the absolute best.

(Quick housekeeping to keep the post manageable - I previously wrote about things like cynghanedd and cywydds and englyns and such here, so check that if you need an explanation.)

What's fun is that we don't know a ton about her, because not a lot got written down about people in her time. Her surviving work covers a 40ish year span at the end of the 1400s to just into the 1500s, but we don't know when she was born or died or anything like that. We know her parents' names? And that she was from Mechain, hence the bardic name. And that she married a guy and had a daughter, something which actually does mark out her body of work as different from her contemporaries; being a wife and mother, she couldn't do the usual bardic role of travelling the country to spread news and play at courts. This means she doesn't have any of the praise poetry that a lot of male bards produced about the lords that hosted them.

But, there's stuff we can piece together about her. For one thing, she was not just literate (not a universal skill for anyone at that point, but especially for women), but she was astonishingly well-read and had what appears to be a classical education, given her poetic references and traditional Welsh meters. For another, her work often had recurring themes of religion, sex, and women's rights, sometimes all at the same time.

At the point Gwerful was active, Welsh bardic culture heavily featured ymrysonau. An ymryson is like... well, I hesitate to say "sort of like a rap battle" after the way everyone and their dog now thinks that's what the Mari Lwyd does, but they were like a cross between a rap battle and the publication war between two rival academics. A bard would write an englyn and publish it in the local parish newsletter. Another bard would see this, and write their own englyn about how stupid the first bard's englyn was, and publish it in the same newsletter. The first bard would see this and retaliate. The second bard would retaliate to that. And on and on it would go, like a printed tennis match for all the parishioners to enjoy, until someone wrote a conclusive verse OR until someone went "Lol, you got me good there" and bowed out with dignity. Sometimes, these things were fucking vicious; but other times, they were just banter between two bards who knew each other and were enjoying the chance to keep their poetic skills in tip top condition.

Now, Gwerful was an active and enthusiastic participant in ymrysonau. We have many examples of her work from these. There are two of particular note that I'll list here, each against a different bard:

Dafydd Llwyd o Fathafarn. Mathafarn and Mechain are not so distant from one another, so no real surprise that these two locked horns a lot, but the impression I always got from their ymrysonau is that they were good mates, actually. These fell into the 'banter' category more often than not. Dafydd was a Welsh Nationalist who was hoping for a Welshman to rise up and throw off the yoke of English oppression, and most of his work is about that, but he turned up the filthy erotic shit for any ymryson with Gwerful because BOY HOWDY was that her specialty. IIRC she did occasionally poke fun at his Welsh Nash leanings, especially his obsession with Mab Darogan (OLD Welsh idea that translates to the Son of Prophesy - the Arthur-style figure that will one day drive out the English overlords), but mostly their ymrysonau were incredibly beautifully-written odes that could be summed up as "Dafydd, my man, my good friend, I mean this sincerely: suck my entire clit".

She often won.

Ieuan Dyfi. God, what a fucking asshole. This one was not banter. Gwerful played for blood with this prick.

We actually would know nothing about Ieuan Dyfi if not for Gwerful Mechain, because it was her poetic response to him that meant his only surviving poems made it to the modern day; that, and the record of him being brought before a church court where he admitted adultery with Anni Goch, a married woman. Oh, and the record of him being brought before the law courts at Liverpool, accused of domestic abuse and gambling? If I remember right?

Two things to know that set the scene for what came next:

One of Gwerful Mechain's surviving poems is an englyn considered to be possibly the oldest extant poem about domestic violence written by a woman: I’w gŵr am ei churo (To the husband who beats her)

Dager drwy goler dy galon - ar osgo I asgwrn dy ddwyfron; Dy lin a dyr, dy law’n don, A’th gleddau i’th goluddion.

There are a lot of translations for this one to try to keep its poeticness, but this one is pretty good:

Through your heart’s lining let there be pressed, slanting down, A dagger to the bone in your chest. Your knee smashed, your hand crushed, may the rest Be gutted by the sword you possessed.

She has others, too, that deal with sexual assault, and something scholars often note about Gwerful is her remarkable knowledge of the law as it pertained to women's issues. So she was not, you see, a woman with a high view of a man accused of domestic violence anyway.

But then Ieuan Dyfi wrote five poems about Anni Goch, the married woman he'd fucked, each more "Wow dude, she said no" than the last, culminating in I Anni Goch; a full cywydd of misogynistic Medieval-incel bullshit about how false and evil women are, which listed all the false and evil women of history including classical and mythological figures.

And. Well. Gwerful had some views.

Her responding cywydd - I ateb Ieuan Dyfi am gywydd Anni Goch - basically blasted the guy back into his own impact crater and disintegrated him. What she did with it, essentially, was to mirror his cywydd. Where he'd gone "Isn't it so true how great men throughout history have always been brought low by women, amirite lads? Here's examples", Gwerful went "Isn't it so true how 'great men' throughout history have behaved appallingly and fucked up through their own actions and then somehow managed to blame women, amirite lads? Here's examples." Where his examples had been historical figures, so were hers. Where his had been classical, so were hers. Where he went Biblical, so did she.

And what's so interesting about that last one is how pointed she was with it - for some reason, in his big list of evil women, Ieuan Dyfi did not go for the most obvious and low-hanging of fruit (no pun intended) - he doesn't cite Eve. In response, Gwerful also sidesteps the most obvious and low hanging of fruit - she doesn't cite Mary. In so doing, she makes it clear that she doesn't even need to.

There is no record of him responding to her. IIRC, there is a record of him doing three years in prison.

But! Outside of all of that, the big thing Gwerful was known for was her erotic poetry. You'll be unsurprised to hear that it wasn't written for shits and giggles - much like today, women of the time were told that most of their value was in their looks, and they had plentiful insecurities about their bodies. Gwerful wrote her erotic stuff to confront those insecurities and shine a light on the issue. There are so many examples of this, but far and away the most famous is definitely Cywydd y Cedor - roughly translated, 'Ode to the Vulva'. Though I have also seen it titled Cywydd y Gont - Ode to the Cunt. It's such a shame that the English language is literally, physically not capable of cynghanedd, because it means unless you learn Welsh you will never understand the beauty and the lyricism of the piece, and how it elevates and undercuts the content at the same time; but it's a joyful, masterful, irreverent work that uses the fancy language male poets were forever dedicating to the rest of a woman's body and applies it squarely to the vulva. In fact it basically opens with "Men are cowards, describe more cunts or gtfo" before launching into its main subject matter. The last line is pro-pubic hair, too, like I really must stress how much Gwerful Mechain would have to offer Tumblr if you could speak Welsh. This is probably her most widely translated piece, though, you can definitely find English versions. Although you can tell how blushing and reticent the translator is - and therefore how sanitised their translation is - by whether they've called it Ode to the Vulva/Cunt, or Ode to the Pubic Hair.

Needless to say, the original is not sanitised.

(Actually, I should also say - this one is also a response piece, probably, but in this case to a bard who lived a century earlier - Dafydd ap Gwilym, the absolutely legendary and uncontested king of Welsh romance poetry. He wrote a poem called Cywydd y Gal - Ode to the Penis. I have only just put two and two together on that.)

As a final note, I should say that my personal favourite Gwerful Mechain poem on this subject, mind, is actually I'w morwyn wrth gachu - to the maiden who is shitting. It's an englyn written in Gwerful's customary high poetic form, but it is what it says - it describes a woman taking a shit, and farting as she does. Beautiful and magical and disgusting and banal, all in one go:

Crwciodd lle dihangodd ei dŵr - ’n grychiast O grochan ei llawdwr; Ei deudwll oedd yn dadwr’, Baw a ddaeth, a bwa o ddŵr

Funnily enough, it's hard to find a good translation for this one lol.

My attempt:

She crouched where her water escaped - creased From the cauldron of her heat; Her two holes were arguing, Shit came, and a bow of water

Eh. It's so bland in English. Honestly, if you could read Welsh...

Anyway, if anyone reading this can read Welsh and wants to read some of Gwerful Mechain's stuff - including some of the pieces she was responding to in the ymrysonau - you can find a load here. Otherwise, I hope you enjoyed!

[satosuguhastakenovermylife]

MWAH NAMI RIGHT BACK AT YA YOU HAVE YAPPED WITH ME ABOUT THE MOST RANDOM SHIT LIKE YOUR REACTIONS WATCHING HAIKYUU, AND FOR HYPING ME UP IN ALL THE THINGS I DO, FOR MAKING ME THE GLAMMEST SCIENTIST AND SO MUCH MORE!!! AND IM SO GRATEFUL AND GLAD THAT WE'RE CLOSE💕💕

OKAY SO BESIDES NAMI

@starry-toya - you listen to my bullshit all day long every single day idk how you do it but you do and that's fucking rad and I love talking to you and words can't describe how much I love you so this isn't that long because I think you know and I think I know already too and i hope we're together forever <3

@pepe-le-pax - the og bestie, you've listened to all my stupid ass existential crises and you've been there for me always for the past seven years and for that i cannot be more grateful. we've gotten a bit distant lately but i hope that phase doesn't last. love youu

@chronicinsanity - second person who deals with all my bullshit and stupidity, you're the funniest and my best friend. i dunno how I'll make it through bus rides without yapping to eachother because the only reason a lot of my days aren't completely shitty is because I get to talk to you at the start and end of every day at school. i love you so muchhh and I'm very surprised that I'm your best friend too because you are mine and I will miss you A LOT (sorry I'm just very sad about you leaving if you haven't realised lmao)

@getosugurusbangs - ELIIII YOU LITERALLY OOZE COOLNESS EVERYDAY AND I WAS SO NERVOUS TO TALK TO YOU AT THE START BUT YOURE SO NICE!! AND SO COOL!!! AND GREAT TO TALK TO AND I HOPE WE GET TO DO SO FOR A LONG TIME!! I LOVED THE BL RECS BTW AND THANKS FOR CHEERING ME UP AND CHECKING IN ON ME WHEN IM WAY OVER MY HEAD ILYSM <333 (penis bros 4lyf)

@riririnnnn - MY PARTNER!!!! YOU'RE SO COOL AND I LOVE TALKING TO YOUUUU WE ARE PARTNER FOREVAHHH AND LETS COPARENT OUR CHILD ONCE ISAGI GIVES BIRTH 💥💥💥 (on a more serious note, you were there to talk me down when i almost did something terrible to myself and I am so so glad you were genuinely you are a great friend and I love you lots)

@jujutsustraycats - BIG BRO ISH!!!! THANKS FOR ALL THE STUDY ADVICE AND FOR ALWAYS MOTIVATING ME TO DO BETTER <3 AND ALSO FOR BEING THE #1 COSMIYA ENABLER YOU ARE CHERISHED FOR THAT AND IK YOU'RE BUSY AND WE DONT GET TO TALK AS MUCH SOMETIMES BUT I LOVE TALKING TO YOUU!!! AND ILY AND I HOPE YOU'RE WELL LET'S YAP ABOUT A BUNCH OF SHIT WHEN YOURE FREE!!!!

@sharkissm - MAKIIIIII ILYSMMMM YOU'RE SO SWEET AND I LOVE TALKING TO YOU ON HERE AND ON DISCORD!!!! also you're the only one I can say the most out of pocket shit with and it's really fun!!!! i love you and let's talk a bunch of shit forever 💕

@blue-thief - you have the most GOATED takes ever literally i don't make the rules it's true. thanks for being the first person to tell me about whatever the fuck is going on in CSM and yapping with me about alnst 🫡 also thanks for helping me with julius caesar, your notes and essay was a fucking god send. ily and happy new year :3

@biggestcharleskinnie - CHARLIEEEE I LOVE YOUUUUUUU YOU'RE SO FUN TO TALK TO AND IK WE INTERACTED MORE ONLY RECENTLY BUT THAT ALONE HAS BROUGHT ME SO MUCH JOY!!!!! ILYSM BUT PLEASE END THE PEACHES WAR djfjdjdjf

@shrii-kk - SHRIIII IM SO HAPPY WHENEVER I GET TO TALK TO YOU!! YOU'RE SO PRETTY AND YOUR LOVE FOR ISAGI YOICHI TRANSCENDS PHYSICALITY JJJFJDDKWK i met you only a couple weeks back, but getting to chat with you on discord about various different shit has really gotten me through this month haha. i love you and I hope you're alright <3

@somepoetwannabe - HI SAM ILYSM!!! talking to all of yall has genuinely been great this year, and I'm so glad I met y'all through pranu on hex. i know some of y'all, i don't know a lot of y'all but I love you guys <3 WIL WHENEVER YOU FRONT NEXT LETS TALK ABOUT HOUSE MD PRETTY PLEASEE, love i love talking to you about music and just the little things :3 thalia you're so cool and i had a lot of fun talking to you too, and lastly bill you were the first one I met, and you're really nice and i wanna say thanks for trying to get me into tma, it seems genuinely so interesting but I fall asleep everytime I try listen to it because it's soothing sjdjdjfj AND I'VE ALSO TALKED TO A BUNCH OF YALL AND ITS BEEN GREAT BUT IM AFRAID IT'LL GET TOO LONG IF I GO ON HAHA

@hijinks-n-lowjinks - jinx!! i love talking to you about fandom stuff and it's really fun. you were one of my first mutuals on here lol and I got comfortable interacting with people on here because of the times I talked to you so thanks a lot <3

okay I'm ending the post here but every single mutual I've interacted on Tumblr is included here, i would've yapped more but I think this is already too long jsjsjdj anyways yeah :D

I love talking nonsense with you and I hope that we can talk nonsense with each other for the rest of our lives.

[harrysfolklore]

labyrinth - fc43

summary: as the only female driver on the grid, everything in yn's life was planned like a perfect qualifying lap. then franco colapinto had to show up. first, he was just that annoying new guy who took her best friend's seat. then he became the driver she absolutely couldn't stand (or at least that's what she kept telling herself) word count: over 13k + social media posts

folkie radio: GUYYYYSSS SHE'S HERE! i started writing this fic in september and it's finally her time to shine!! this is my first time writing driver!reader so please be gentle with me. also, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! may all of your wishes come true

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 1,027,537 others

yourinstagram p6 in zandvoort ! happy to see max on the podium for his home race. see you soon monza 🇮🇹

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username1 LEGEND

username2 p6 with that tractor feels like a podium finish fr

username3 give your seat to danny already

oscarpiastri Well done stinks 👊

↳ logansargeant Don’t praise her, her ego gets inflated

↳ username2 BEST TRIO ON THE GRID

↳ yourinstagram you’re both so jealous of me

redbullracing Keep pushing ! 💙

↳ username1 FIX HER FUCKING CAR

username4 p6 in a redbull? just hand the seat to someone more deserving

francolapinto Amazing 🙌🙌

↳ username2 franco is such a fannn

danielricciardo Proud of you 👌👌

↳ username1 haters want to create this beef between yn and danny for the seat but him adores her

maxverstappen1 Look she’s a nice teammate

↳ yourinstagram you adore me 😤

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A knot forms in your stomach as you read the messages. Something about the tone doesn't sit right with you. You quickly head towards Logan's motorhome, your mind racing and your axiety creeping in.

When you arrive, Oscar is already there, leaning against the wall with a concerned expression. Logan sits on the couch, his shoulders slumped and his gaze fixed on the floor.

"Logan?" you ask softly, stepping into the room. "What's going on?"

He looks up at you, then at Oscar, his eyes filled with a mix of anger and resignation. "I… I'm not coming back for the next race," he says, his voice barely above a whisper.

You feel like you've been punched in the gut. Deep down, a part of you had known this was coming. Rumors in the paddock spread faster than a Formula 1 car on a straight, and there had been whispers about Logan's seat for weeks. But you hadn't wanted to believe it. You'd pushed those thoughts aside, convinced that if you just ignored them, they wouldn't come true.

"What? What do you mean you're not coming back?"

Oscar pushes off the wall, his brow furrowed. "Mate, what happened?"

Logan takes a deep breath, running a hand through his hair. "Williams… they're replacing me. I'm out."

The room falls silent for a moment as the news sinks in. Then, all at once, you feel a surge of anger coursing through your veins.

"They can't do that!" you exclaim, your voice rising. "It's mid-season! You've been improving, you've been working so hard. How can they just… just throw you away like this?"

Logan shrugs, a bitter smile on his face. "Apparently, they can. And they have."

A wave of emotions come crashing to you. Anger at Williams for their decision, frustration at the ruthless nature of the sport, and an overwhelming sadness for Logan.

Oscar moves to sit beside Logan, placing a hand on his shoulder. "I'm so sorry, mate. This is bullshit."

You start pacing the room, your anger building with each step. "Who are they replacing you with? Some pay driver? Some rookie who's never even touched an F1 car?"

"Franco Colapinto," Logan says quietly.

You stop in your tracks, whirling to face him. "Colapinto? The F2 kid? Are they out of their minds?"

Oscar tries to interject, his voice calm. "YN, maybe we should-"

But you're too fired up to listen. "No, Oscar! This is wrong. It's so wrong. Logan deserves better than this. He deserves a chance to prove himself. How is he supposed to do that if they don't even give him a full season?"

Logan looks up at you, a mix of gratitude and sadness in his eyes. "I appreciate you having my back, stinks. But it's done. There's nothing we can do about it now."

You shake your head. "No, there has to be something. They can't just replace you with some F2 kid like that. They're out of their minds."

"YN," Oscar cuts in firmly. "I know you're angry. We all are. But right now, we need to be here for Logan. This isn't about us or what we think is fair. It's about supporting our friend."

As Oscar's words sink in, you feel a wave of guilt wash over you. He's right, of course. This isn't about your anger or your sense of injustice. It's about Logan, your friend who's just had his dream ripped away from him.

The three of you have been racing together since you were kids, climbing through the ranks side by side. You've shared victories and defeats, laughter and tears. You've pushed each other to be better, to chase your dreams relentlessly. And now, one of you is being left behind.

You take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself. "I just… I can't believe this is happening."

Logan manages a small smile. "It's okay, stinks. I appreciate your passion. It's one of the things I've always admired about you."

"Remember when we were in karting, and YN nearly got into a fist fight with that kid who tried to push Logan off the track?" Oscar says with a small smile, trying to light up the mood.

"How could I forget?" +

Logan chuckles softly, "She was like a tiny ball of fury."

You feel a smile tugging at your lips despite the situation. "Hey, nobody messes with my boys and gets away with it."

"And nothing's changed," Oscar adds, giving you a fond look. "We've always had each other's backs, through everything. This is not the exception."

Without another word, the three of you come together in a tight group hug, a physical representation of the bond you've shared for so many years.

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liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri and 2,017,697 others

yourinstagram logan, you’re more than just a friend — you’re family. we’ve raced together since we were kids, dreaming of f1. to see that dream cut short for you is heartbreaking

your talent, dedication and kindness have always shone through. you deserved better than this mid-season swap. this sport can be cruel, but this feels especially unfair and i’m angry that my friend’s journey has been interrupted

but i’m also incredibly proud of you, logan. you have handled this with grace and strength and this isn’t the end for you — it’s just a detour. love you, stinks 🥲

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username1 IM SOBBING

username2 i still can’t believe this

username3 well hold your tears because you’re next

pierregasly Chin up, mate @/logansargeant you’re a champ 👊

alex_albon You will always be family @/logansargeant, It’s so sad to see you go

username4 that was cute now hand your seat to daniel or yuki

username5 THE FIRST PIC 🥺🥺 IM NOT OKAY

username6 oh she’s PISSED

username7 this is so unfair for logan

username8 colapinto has an enemy on track already and it’s her 😭

username9 the best trio will be incomplete now i’m not okay

username10 YOU NEXT BYE BYE

logansargeant Thank you for everything, go make me proud 💙

↳ username1 IM SOBBING AGAIN

liked by francolapinto, landonorris and 410,764 others

williamsracing Franco Colapinto to race for the remainder of the 2024 season.

username1 VAMOOOS

username2 hello?? hes cute

username3 OKAY I SEE

username4 good thing for the team, sargeant was just not it

alex_albon Welcome to the fam @/francolapinto 👊

username5 KIIING

username6 an f1 kid who's not even top 5 right now in the championship? risky move

yourinstagram not even giving logan a proper goodbye? yall suck

THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN DETELED

username1 OMFG YN WE SAW THAT

username2 YN 😭😭

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Monza is always a race to look forward no matter what team you drive for, but today, your excitement is just not there.

The paddock feels different without Logan's presence, you have always raced alongside him, and not seeing his face during a race weekend feels wrong.

As you make your way through the bustling crowd, you can't help but feel a pang of sadness and anger. Inside the Red Bull hospitality area, you find Max already settled in, scrolling through his phone. He looks up as you approach, a sympathetic smile on his face.

"Hey, kiddo. How are you holding up?" he asks, gesturing for you to take a seat next to him.

"As well as can be expected, I guess," you slump into the chair, running a hand through your hair. "It just feels wrong, you know?"

"Yeah, I get it," Max nods, his expression thoughtful, "How's Logan doing? Have you talked to him?"

The mention of Logan's name ignites that spark of anger inside you again. "He's… he's putting on a brave face, but I know he's hurting. This whole situation is such bullshit, Max. Williams made a huge mistake."

Max raises an eyebrow, sensing the storm brewing beneath your calm exterior. "You want to talk about it?"

That's all the invitation you need. The words start pouring out of you, your voice rising with each sentence.

"It's just so unfair! Logan was improving every race. He was working his ass off, putting in the hours, doing everything the team asked of him. And for what? To be tossed aside mid-season for some rookie?"

Max tries to interject, "Well, Colapinto has been pretty impressive in F2-"

But you're on a roll now, barely registering his words. "Impressive in F2? So what? F1 is a whole different ball game. Logan was just starting to get comfortable, to really show what he could do. And now they've brought in this Colapinto kid who's never even driven an F1 car, who's probably a paid driver who's just going to waste everyone's times. What kind of message does that send?"

You stand up, pacing back and forth as you continue your rant. "Williams is making a huge mistake. They're throwing away all the work Logan put in, all the data they've gathered. For what? A gamble on some unproven talent? And don't even get me started on how they handled it. No warning, no real explanation. Just 'Thanks for your service, now get out.' It's disrespectful, it's short-sighted, and it's everything that's wrong with this sport sometimes."

Max watches you, a mix of concern and surprise on his face. He's never seen you this fired up before. "YN, I understand you're upset, but-"

"No, Max!" you interrupt him, "You don't understand because you'll never have the fear of having your seat taken from you out of nowhere. You're Max Verstappen. You're safe. But for the rest of us… we're always one bad weekend away from losing everything."

Max's brow furrows, clearly taken aback by your statement. "YN, that's not true. I worked hard to get where I am-"

"I know you did," you interrupt again, your voice softer now. "I'm not saying you didn't. But you have to admit, your position is different. You're a world champion. You're untouchable. But for drivers like Logan, like me… we're always looking over our shoulders, always wondering if this race will be our last."

Max is silent for a moment, processing your words. "I guess you're right, I've been in a secure position for so long, I forgot what it's like to worry about your seat." He pauses, then adds, "But you know, you're in a unique position too. You're the only woman driving a Formula 1 car. That's pretty special. You should feel-"

You cut him off, your frustration flaring up again. "Exactly! I'm the only woman here, Max. Do you have any idea how much more pressure that puts on me? Every move I make is scrutinized. Every-"

Before you can continue, you spot Franco Colapinto walking past the Red Bull area, chatting animatedly with his new race engineer. The sight of him in Williams colors sends another wave of resentment through you, and you turn away abruptly.

"I need some air," you mutter, storming out of the hospitality area, leaving a bewildered Max in your wake.

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The sun beats down as you stand next to Oscar on the flatbed truck, waiting for the drivers' parade to begin. The usual buzz of excitement surrounding Monza feels muted to you, overshadowed still by Logan's absence and the presence of his replacement.

"Oi, what's with the long face?" Oscar nudges you playfully with his elbow. "You look like someone stole your last Tim Tam."

"Oh shut up, you dork," you can't help but crack a small smile, "As if I'd ever let anyone near my precious Tim Tams."

"Too right," Oscar grins. "But seriously, how are you holding up?"

You shrug, trying to keep your expression neutral for the cameras. "Oh, you know, just peachy. Nothing like a bit of midseason drama to spice things up, right?"

"Always the optimist, aren't you?" Oscar rolls his eyes, "Come on, I bet you twenty quid you can't name all the Italian F1 circuits without googling."

"You're on, Piastri," you say, grateful for the distraction. "Monza, Imola, Mugello…"

As you're racking your brain for more, you notice Franco Colapinto approaching. Your playful mood evaporates instantly.

Franco's eyes widen as he gets closer, clearly starstruck. "Uh, hi," he says nervously. "I'm Franco. I just wanted to introduce myself."

Oscar, ever the diplomat, smiles and extends his hand. "Hey mate, welcome to F1. I'm Oscar."

Franco shakes his hand before turning to you, his expression one of barely contained awe. "And you're YN. I… I can't believe I'm actually meeting you. You're such an inspiration. The way you've broken barriers in this sport, it's incredible. I've followed your career since your F3 days and-"

You cut him off, your voice cool. "Thanks. Welcome to the grid."

Franco's smile falters, but he presses on. "I just wanted to say how much I admire what you've accomplished. You've paved the way for so many young drivers, especially women in motorsport. It's an honor to be racing alongside you."

You nod stiffly. "Thanks," you repeat, your tone making it clear that you're not interested in continuing the conversation.

An awkward silence falls over the group. Oscar, sensing the tension, tries to smooth things over. "So, Franco, how are you finding the step up to F1 so far?"

As Franco turns to answer Oscar, you take the opportunity to step away, moving to the other side of the truck. You can feel Oscar's gaze following you, but you can't bring yourself to engage in small talk with Logan's replacement, no matter how well-intentioned he might be.

As you're standing alone, Alex approaches, a sympathetic smile on his face. "Hey, mind if I join you?"

You shrug. "Free country, Albon. Or free truck, I guess."

Alex chuckles softly. "How are you doing? I know this can't be easy for you."

You sigh, your guard dropping slightly with Alex. "It's… complicated. I'm angry for Logan, but I know it's not Franco's fault. It's just…"

"It's the reality of the sport we're in," Alex finishes for you. "Trust me, I get it. Been there, done that, got the Red Bull rejection t-shirt."

Your stomach twists at the mention of that, suddenly remembering the endless conversations and warnings from your team. And how despite having a contract for next season, there's threats about your seat being take away after every race weekend. But you push the thought away.

"Always the comedian, aren't you?"

"Someone's got to keep the mood light around here," Alex grins. "But seriously, I know it's tough. Franco's a good kid, though. He's been working really hard, trying to learn as much as he can."

You nod, not quite ready to let go of your resentment but appreciating Alex's perspective. "How's he settling in?"

"As well as can be expected," Alex says. "He's got a lot to learn, but he's eager. It's a big step up from F2, but he's handling the pressure well so far."

You're about to respond when the parade starts moving. Alex gives you a supportive pat on the shoulder before moving back to his spot. As the truck rolls down the straight, the cheers of the Tifosi wash over you. You lift your hand to wave, a mix of emotions swirling inside you that go beyond just Logan's replacement.

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liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 1,638,578 others

yourinstagram p8. it is what it is. ciao monza 👋

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username1 you will always be the moment

username2 FIX THE FUCKING CAR ALREADY

username3 ouu shes DONEEE

username4 most undeserved seat on the grid i swear

username5 anyway RICBULL IS COMING

francolapinto Such a pleasure to race alongside you!

↳ username1 franco respects and admires her so much i love it

↳ username2 im pretty sure yn hates him tho

username6 the constructors championship is gone thanks to her

logansargeant Chin up, love you 💙

↳ username2 i miss them so much

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

liked by username1, username2 and 12,739 others

f1gossip YN arriving at Red Bull HQ in Milton Keynes

Tensions running high as rumors swirl about potential driver shake-ups. Sources say YN’s recent performance has bosses considering options

Is the Honey Badger eyeing a comeback or could young Liam Lawson be making the leap to F1? 🤔

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username1 bro...

username2 they better fix her car NOW

username3 RICBULL RICBULL

username4 honestly the best thing for the team would be her getting replaced

username5 YAAAS SHE'S OUT FINALLY

username6 oscar is the only 2023 rookie who actually puts in the work

username7 some people need to start putting some respect on yn's name bc yall keep forgetting she was third in the championship and got her first win during her ROOKIE SEASON and the reason she's struggling rn is bc redbull is not getting their shit together

↳ username1 right??? they're just saying shit

↳ username4 you said it yourself, she has a championship winning car and she's not delivering. she should be out

username8 YN GET BEHIND ME

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liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 1,638,538 others

yourinstagram great quali, we should have some fun tomorrow 😚

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username1 SLAYYY

username2 p4 after all the nonsense surrounding her seat? feels right

username3 THE QUEEN OF BAKU FOR REAL

lilyzneimer my favorite supergirl 💙

username4 she got lucky

username5 don't care, we still want danny or liam in that seat

username6 enjoy the race bc it might be your last

username7 watch her on that podium tomorrow

logansargeant Super proud always

↳ username2 LOGAN WE MISSS YOUUUU

francolapinto 🤩

liked by username1, logansargeant and 270,847 others

redbullracing Solid race and a bunch of points for the team 👊

Result 🏁PIA, LEC, YN P3, NOR, Max P5, ALO, ALB, COL, HAM, BEA

#F1 #RedBullRacing #AzerbaijanGP

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username1 SO DAMN TRUE

username2 yn back on the podium FINALLY

username3 yn saw the rumors about her seat and decided to shut them up

username4 SHES BEATING MAX FINALLY

username5 did they finally fix the car

username6 i don't want anyone commenting on her seat anymore

username7 i knew she got into that care absolutely PISSED

username8 QUEEN OF BAKU

liked by oscarpiastri, francolapinto and 1,764,933 others

yourinstagram was that entertaining? 😙 so happy to be on the podium for osco's second win, i love you so muuuch you diva

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username1 LEGEND

username2 she's so smug

username3 TELL THEM QUEEEN

landonorris The third pic is definitely your best @/oscarpiastri

↳ yourinstagram IKR

↳ username1 I LOVE THEM

logansargeant Congrats to both of you @/oscarpiastri @/yourinstagram I'm always proud of everything you achieve ❤️

↳ username2 logan should be there too i'm sad now

↳ oscarpiastri Love you mate

↳ yourinstagram this paddock will never be the same without you

maxvertsappen1 🙌🙌 So proud of you little sister

oscarpiastri Love you stinks

francolapinto Congrats! Always an honor to race alongside you

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

The drivers' briefing has just concluded, and you find yourself lingering in the room, chatting with your friends.

"I swear, I almost peed my pants at that press conference!," Lando says, his eyes widening as he recalls, "When Max and YN just sat there in silence, staring down the journalists… I thought I was going to lose it!"

Pierre chuckles, giving you a knowing look. "I knew YN was the mastermind behind that. It has her written all over it."

"Well, someone had to make a point about these ridiculous penalties," you can't help but grin.

The group's laughter is interrupted as Franco approaches, a tentative smile on his face. "Hey guys, mind if I join?"

The others welcome him warmly, and you feel a knot forming in your stomach. You force a tight smile, trying to keep your emotions in check.

"Franco, mate!" George exclaims, patting him on the back. "That was some impressive driving in practice. You're settling in well."

Alex nods in agreement. "Yeah, you're really holding your own out there. Williams made a good choice."

You feel your jaw clench at Alex's words, but you remain silent, watching as Franco's face lights up with pride and gratitude.

"Thanks, guys," Franco says, his voice humble. "I still have a lot to learn, but I'm giving it my all."

"Well, it's paying off," Lando chimes in, "Points in just your second race? You're pushing that Williams harder than we've seen in a while."

As the conversation continues, with each driver offering praise and encouragement to Franco, you feel your frustration and anger building.

The memory of Logan's disappointment and unfairness of it all, mixed with the ever present threat of you seat having the same fate, bubbles up inside you until you can't contain it anymore.

"And what about Logan?" you snap, your voice cutting through the friendly chatter like a knife. The group falls silent, all eyes turning to you in surprise. Franco's smile fades, replaced by a look of discomfort and guilt.

"YN…" Oscar starts, his tone cautionary.

But you're too fired up to stop now. "No, seriously. Everyone's so quick to praise him, but what about Logan? He was improving every race, working his ass off, and for what? To be tossed aside mid-season?"

The atmosphere in the room becomes tense. George and Alex exchange uncomfortable glances, while Pierre shifts uneasily.

Franco, looking distressed, speaks up. "I never meant for Logan to lose his seat. I just took the opportunity when it was offered to me. Any driver would have done the same."

"Oh, so that makes it okay?" his words only fuel your anger. "You just 'took the opportunity'? Do you have any idea how hard Logan worked for that seat? How much he sacrificed?"

"YN, that's enough," Oscar says firmly, placing a hand on your arm.

But you shrug him off, your eyes blazing as you face Franco. "You waltz in here, taking a seat you didn't earn, and everyone's falling over themselves to congratulate you. It's not right. It's not fair."

The room falls into a shocked silence. Franco looks like he's been slapped, his earlier excitement completely deflated. The other drivers are staring at you with a mix of surprise and disapproval.

It's George who finally breaks the tension. "YN, I think we all understand you're upset about Logan. We all are. But this isn't Franco's fault. He's just trying to make the most of his chance, like any of us would."

You feel a flush of shame creeping up your neck, but your anger is still simmering. "You don't understand," you mutter, but the fight has gone out of your voice.

Franco, looking genuinely distressed, takes a step towards you. "I'm sorry about what happened to Logan. I really am. I have nothing but respect for him, and for you. I never wanted to cause any problems."

His sincerity catches you off guard, and for a moment, you see not the driver who replaced your friend, but a young, talented kid trying to navigate a difficult situation. However, your anger and frustration gets the best of you.

"Whatever," you mumble, pushing past the group and out of the room, leaving a stunned silence as you disappear.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

liked by lewishamilton, alex_albon and 709,639 others

francolapinto still buzzing from singapore 🇸🇬growing up watching Lewis battle in marina bay and now getting to race wheel to wheel with him... surreal doesn't even begin to cover it 🤯 and that fight with YN for position was proper racing - those last few laps were intense! thank you to the team for giving me a car that could fight at the front. vamos 💪

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username1 he’s an f1 driver now but he’ll always be a fanboy

lewishamilton Good racing kid, you've got a bright future ahead 👊🏾

williamsracing Our boy! 💙

username3 Did anyone else notice how aggressive YN was when overtaking Franco? Almost pushed him into the wall...

↳ username1 fr she looked like she wanted to crash him

↳ username4 they were racing for position, that's what racing drivers do 🙄

username5 the way he always mentions YN in his posts but she never acknowledges him 👀

username6 that move from YN was unnecessarily aggressive, could've ended badly

landonorris Great drive mate!

liked by yourinstagram, maxverstappen1 and 2,370,739 others

f1 BREAKING: Daniel Ricciardo to leave RB, the team have announced. Liam Lawson will race in place of Ricciardo for the remaining six races of the season for the team.

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username1 DANNY NOOOO

username2 this sucks man

danielricciardo Been a hell of a ride! Thank you RB family ❤️

maxverstappen1 Going to miss you mate!

username3 Wrong driver leaving... YN should be the one out

↳ username1 exactly! she's been underperforming all season

yourinstagram always grateful for everything you taught me DR. more than a driver - you've been a big brother, mentor, and friend since day one. going to miss our pre-race dance parties 🥺🤍

↳ username3 now give him your seat

↳ username1 it's no annoying to see that drivers like her have an undeserved contract extension and talented drivers get left out

↳ danielricciardo Love you kiddo! Make me proud

username5 Gutted to see Danny Ric go 💔

landonorris Won't be the same without you mate!

username7 @/yourinstagram Maybe focus more on racing than dancing 🙄

↳ username8 she's literally P5 in the championship, shut up

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As you step off the plane in Florida, the warm air envelops you, a stark contrast to the crisp autumn weather you left behind in Europe. Your heart lightens as you spot Logan waiting for you, his familiar grin a welcome sight after weeks of tension and stress. You missed your best friend so much.

You rush towards him, throwing your arms around him in a tight hug. "I missed you so much," you say, your voice muffled against his shoulder. "That paddock sucks without you."

Logan chuckles, returning the hug with equal enthusiasm. "I missed you too, stinks." He pulls back, a mischievous glint in his eye. "Now, let's grab a beer since you're out of race cars for a while."

You nod eagerly, letting him lead the way. He drives you to a nearby bar, one you've learned over the years of knowing him was the one he used to go to during his teenage years. The casual atmosphere is a refreshing change from the high-pressure environment of the paddock. As you settle into a booth with cold beers in hand, you feel some of the tension from the past few months start to melt away.

"So, how's life outside the F1 bubble?" you ask, taking a sip of beer.

Logan grins, leaning back in his seat. "It's… different. But not all bad. Actually, I've got some news." He pauses for dramatic effect. "I've been in talks with a few IndyCar teams."

Your eyes widen with excitement. "Logan, that's fantastic! Tell me everything!"

For the next hour, Logan animatedly describes his meetings with IndyCar team principals, the tracks he's excited to race on, and the new challenges he's looking forward to. You listen intently, genuinely happy for your friend's potential new chapter.

"It's not F1," Logan admits, "but it's a hell of a racing series. And who knows? Maybe it'll lead me back to F1 someday."

"I have no doubt," you assure him, raising your bottle in a toast. "To new beginnings!"

As the conversation flows, you find yourself relaxing more than you have in months. You chat about mutual friends, swap funny stories from your junior racing days, and discuss the latest paddock gossip.

Eventually, Logan's expression turns a bit more serious. "So, Oscar's been keeping me updated on what's been going on in F1. Sounds like things have been… tense with Franco."

You feel your mood shift at the mention of Franco's name. "Yeah, you could say that," you mutter, taking a long swig of your beer.

Logan leans forward, his voice gentle but firm. "YN, I know you're upset on my behalf, but you can't keep this grudge going forever. Franco's just a kid trying to make his way in the sport, like we all were not too long ago."

"I know, I know. It's just," you sigh heavily, "Every time I see him in the garage, in your overalls, talking to your engineers… it feels wrong, Logan. Like he's stolen something that belongs to you."

"But he didn't steal anything," Logan counters. "The team made a decision. It sucks for me, yeah, but that's not on Franco. He just took an opportunity that was offered to him. Can you honestly say you wouldn't have done the same in his position?"

You open your mouth to argue, then close it again. Logan has a point, and you know it.

"Look," Logan continues, "I've had some time to process all this, and I've come to terms with it. It's a cutthroat sport, YN. We all know that. Franco's not the villain here."

"But the way it happened," you protest, "mid-season, with no warning. It wasn't fair to you."

"Fair doesn't always come into it in F1. It just happens," Logan shrugs, "Besides," he adds with a hint of a smile, "I hear he's doing a decent job. The kid's got talent."

"He's alright," you grudgingly admit. "But he's not you."

Logan laughs. "No one's me, stinks. I'm one of a kind."

You can't help but crack a smile at that. "True enough."

"So," Logan says, his tone turning serious again, "can you promise me you'll try to ease up on Franco? Give him a fair shot? For me?"

You sigh deeply, considering his words. "I'll try," you finally concede. "But I'm not promising to be his best friend or anything."

"That's all I ask," Logan says, looking relieved. "Now, is this just about Franco replacing me, or is there something else going on? You seem… I don't know, more on edge than usual."

For a moment, you consider telling him about the talks with Red Bull, about the uncertainty surrounding your own seat. The words are on the tip of your tongue, but something holds you back. Maybe it's not wanting to burden Logan with your problems, or maybe it's not being ready to voice your fears out loud.

"No, nothing else," you lie, forcing a smile. "Just the usual F1 stress, you know how it is."

Logan nods, though he doesn't look entirely convinced. "Well, if there ever is anything, you know you can talk to me, right? Even if I'm not in the paddock anymore."

"I know," you say, feeling a pang of guilt. "Thanks, Logan. Really."

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

liked by logansargeant, landonorris and 1,289,673 others

yourinstagram florida !!! is one hell of a drug

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username1 AHHH she visited logan

logansargeant Next time we're doing the gator tour 🐊

↳ username2 i love them sm

oscarpiastri No invite for your favourite Aussie? Rude

↳ username2 we need the iconic trio together again

username3 they've been friends since forever, love how they support each other

username4 Logan and YN's friendship >>>>>

username5 Why is she on holiday when she should be working on her driving?

username6 the way logan always has her back 🥺

username7 surely there are better uses of time with 4 races left and her seat under threat?

francolapinto Amazing 🙌

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

You arrive at the Red Bull hospitality area in Austin, the excitement of being back after the break palpable in the air. As you walk in, you spot Max lounging on one of the sofas, scrolling through his phone.

"Well, well, look who finally decided to show up," Max grins, looking up from his device. "Did you get lost in the Texas wilderness?"

You roll your eyes playfully, dropping your bag on a nearby chair. "Oh, I'm sorry, Your Highness. Did I keep you waiting? I was busy signing autographs for all my adoring fans. You know how it is… oh wait, you don't."

"Ouch, that hurt," Max clutches his chest in mock pain, "And here I was, about to show you something interesting, but now I'm not so sure you deserve it."

You raise an eyebrow, curiosity piqued. The banter with Max always helps you relax before a race weekend, and you've missed this during the break. "Oh come on, spill it, Verstappen. You know you want to. Don't make me steal your phone."

Max chuckles and pats the seat next to him. "Alright, alright. Sit down before you hurt yourself trying to reach my phone."

As you sit down, he pulls up a video on his phone. "Check this out. It's an interview with your biggest fan."

It's an interview with Franco. Your initial instinct is to look away, a mix of guilt and stubbornness rising in your chest. But something in Max's expression makes you watch.

"Lewis Hamilton and YN are my biggest idols in F1," Franco is saying, his face earnest. "The way YN races, her dedication and skill, it's truly inspiring. She's broken so many barriers and shown that talent knows no gender. I feel honored just to be on the same grid as her."

As the interview continues, Franco heaps more praise on you, his admiration clear in every word. You feel a twinge of guilt, remembering how cold you've been towards him. The genuine respect in his voice makes you uncomfortable, forcing you to confront your own prejudices.

"Her overtake on Leclerc in Interlagos last year? That was pure brilliance," Franco continues. "I've watched that move countless times, trying to learn from it. YN's not just a great driver, she's changing the face of the sport. I hope one day I can race wheel-to-wheel with her and show her the respect she deserves on track."

Max turns off the video and looks at you expectantly. "I think you owe someone an apology," he says, his tone gentle but firm.

You nod slowly, the realization sinking in. A wave of shame washes over you as you remember your cold behavior towards Franco. "I think I do," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper.

Max puts a comforting hand on your shoulder. "Hey, we all make mistakes. What matters is how we fix them. Franco's a good kid, and he really looks up to you. Maybe it's time to give him a chance?"

You sigh, running a hand through your hair. "I actually talked to Logan last week," you confess, watching Max's eyebrows rise in surprise. "He's doing well, actually - focusing on IndyCar now. But we talked a lot about… everything."

"Yeah?" Max shifts in his seat, clearly intrigued. It's not often you open up about these things.

"He basically told me I needed to stop fighting battles that weren't mine to fight. Said he appreciates me having his back, but Franco isn't the enemy here. He's just chasing his dream, like we all did. Logan said he remembers how it felt, getting his first chance - we all do."

Max nods thoughtfully. "Logan's right, you know. We've all been there at some point - getting an opportunity because someone else lost theirs. It's just how F1 works sometimes."

"I know," you admit, standing up. "And I've been unfair to Franco. He's actually doing a really good job with Williams, fighting in the midfield with a car that's not the easiest to drive. And here I am, making him feel unwelcome when I should be supporting talent. Some role model I am, right?"

"So what are you going to do about it?" Max asks, though his smile suggests he already knows.

You spot Franco heading towards the Williams hospitality area. "I'm going to make it right."

Walking over to Williams, you feel your heart pounding a little faster with each step. You find Franco sitting at one of the tables, going through data on his laptop with his race engineer.

"Franco?" you call out. "Could I steal you for a moment?"

He looks up, surprise evident on his face. "YN? Hi… yeah, of course." He glances at his engineer, who nods and excuses himself.

"Mind if I sit?" you ask, gesturing to the empty chair. When he nods, you take a deep breath. "I owe you an apology. A proper one."

Franco starts to shake his head, but you hold up a hand. "Please, let me finish. I've been unfair to you, and it wasn't right. I let my loyalty to Logan blind me to the fact that you're just a talented driver making the most of your opportunity. I've been cold, sometimes even hostile, and you didn't deserve any of that."

"I… thank you," Franco says quietly. "That means a lot. I want you to know, I reached out to Logan when-"

"I know," you interrupt gently. "He told me. That's partly why I'm here. You showed real class doing that, Franco. And you're doing a great job with the car. That P8 in Baku? That was proper racing."

A genuine smile breaks across his face. "Coming from you, that really means a lot. You know, I've watched your races since I was in F3. The way you fought through all the doubters, proved everyone wrong… you're really an inspiration."

You feel your throat tighten unexpectedly. "I had no idea."

"That's why your opinion means so much," Franco admits, fiddling with his water bottle. "When you seemed disappointed in me being here… it hurt, you know?"

"I'm sorry," you say again, meaning it more than ever. "How about we start fresh? Maybe you can talk me through that overtake in Baku - I noticed you used a similar line to what I did in Interlagos last year."

Franco's eyes light up. "You caught that? I actually studied your move while preparing for the race! The way you positioned the car on entry…"

You spend the next twenty minutes discussing racing lines and overtaking techniques, the earlier tension completely dissolved. Franco's enthusiasm is infectious, reminding you of your own early days in F1.

When you finally walk back to Max, you feel lighter than you have in months. He greets you with a knowing smile. "Feel better?"

"Much better," you admit. "Sometimes you need a kick in the right direction So thank you, I needed that wake-up call."

"Anytime," he smirks, throwing an arm around your shoulders, "Can't have my teammate being the paddock villain, can I? That's my job."

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

Liked by francolapinto, maxverstappen1 and 1,667,459 others

yourinstagram rookies keeping us on our toes 😤 good battles today @/francolapinto

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username1 THIS IS LEGENDARY

username3 franco is going to piss his pants

williamsracing Our rookie giving the Red Bull a run for their money 💙

username4 she shouldn’t be acknowledging that a rookie in a williams is making it hard for her… embarrasing

username5 the start of YN and Franco's friendship? 👀

username7 the tension between these two was getting old, glad they're friends now

username8 HANDLE YOUR SEAT

username8 MY DUO 😭❤️

francolapinto Next time I won’t make it easy for you!

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

The private jet hums quietly through the night sky towards Mexico City. Most of the other drivers are asleep, exhausted from the intense Austin weekend. You find yourself unable to sleep, your mind still racing from the events of the day. Glancing around the dimly lit cabin, you notice Franco is also awake, absently flipping through a magazine.

Catching your eye, he gives you a warm smile and moves to the empty seat across from you. "Can't sleep either?"

"Too much adrenaline still," you admit, adjusting your position to face him better. "Great drive today, by the way. That point was well-deserved."

Franco's face lights up at the compliment. "Thanks! Though it's nothing compared to your battle with Lando. I was watching it from behind and thought 'there's no way she's going to make that stick' but then you just… did. It was incredible."

You laugh softly, careful not to wake the others. "There was a moment there where I wasn't sure either. But sometimes you just have to go for it, you know?"

"Oh, I know exactly what you mean," Franco grins. "Like that time in F3 when I tried to go around the outside at Spa and ended up practically in another timezone."

"Please tell me there's video of that," you snicker.

"Unfortunately for my dignity, yes. I think my engineer still uses it as an example of what not to do."

The conversation flows naturally, jumping from racing stories to childhood memories. You find yourself genuinely enjoying his company, something that would have seemed impossible just a few weeks ago.

"So what made you want to be a racing driver?" you ask, genuinely curious.

As Franco launches into how he found his passion for the sport, you find yourself really looking at him properly for the first time. The soft cabin lighting catches the angles of his face, and you notice details you'd overlooked before. His eyes are warm with flecks of gold, crinkling slightly at the corners when he smiles. There's a small scar above his right eyebrow, barely noticeable unless you're paying attention. His dark hair is slightly disheveled from the long race day, a few strands falling across his forehead.

You catch yourself thinking how handsome he actually is, in that classic way. His animated expressions as he talks about racing make him even more attractive, his passion for the sport evident in every gesture.

"...and that's when I knew I wanted to do this forever," he finishes, then looks slightly embarrassed. "Sorry, I'm rambling. I tend to get carried away when talking about racing."

"No, don't apologize," you say quickly. "It's refreshing to see that kind of enthusiasm. Some of the guys get so jaded after a while."

Franco's smile turns a bit shy. "Speaking of enthusiasm, I'm really excited about racing in Mexico this weekend. It's one of my favorite cities - the atmosphere is just incredible."

"The fans are amazing there," you agree. "Though I still haven't found a really good place to eat in Mexico City. The hotel restaurant gets old pretty quickly."

Franco's eyes light up. "Oh, you have to let me help with that! I know a couple of amazing restaurants in the city. There's this incredible place that serves the best traditional dishes you've ever tasted, and another one in that does contemporary Mexican cuisine that would blow your mind."

You find yourself intrigued, both by the suggestion and the eager way he's describing it. "That sounds way better than room service."

"We could..." he hesitates for a moment, then continues with determination, "we could go together, if you'd like? After Thursday's media duties maybe? I'd love to show you my favorite spots."

There's something endearing about the way he's trying to sound casual while clearly being nervous about asking. You feel a flutter in your stomach that you definitely weren't expecting.

"You know what? That sounds great," you say, surprised by how much you mean it. "It's about time I experienced proper Mexican cuisine."

Franco's face breaks into a brilliant smile. "Perfect! I'll make a reservation for Thursday evening then. Trust me, you won't regret it."

As the conversation continues, you can't help but notice how natural it feels now, how easily you're laughing at his jokes and sharing stories. It's hard to believe this is the same person you were avoiding just a few weeks ago.

As other drivers start stirring from their sleep, Franco returns to his original seat, but not before confirming your dinner plans one more time.

Watching him walk away, you find yourself looking forward to Thursday evening more than you probably should. It's just dinner with a colleague, you tell yourself, even as you catch yourself smiling at the thought of it.

"Just dinner," you whisper to yourself, but somehow, you're not entirely convinced.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

yourinstagram has added to their close friends stories

replies:

georgerussell63 So that was all the giggling I heard during the flight

oscarpiastri I’m so telling Logan

maxverstappen1 Can I say “I told you so” now?

francolapinto close friends privileges already? wow

↳ yourinstagram don’t push it colapinto

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

The hotel lobby is relatively quiet as you wait for Franco, having agreed to meet there before heading to the restaurant. You've opted for casual - a simple black dress that makes you feel confident but not overdressed.

"Ready to have your mind blown by the best food in Mexico City?" Franco's voice makes you turn. He's wearing dark jeans and a well-fitted navy button-down, and you try not to notice how good he looks.

"Big claims require big proof," you tease, falling into step beside him.

"Well, well, what do we have here?" Lando's familiar accent cuts through the lobby. He's just coming in from what looks like a gym session, and his surprised smirk makes you want to roll your eyes. "Interesting dinner plans?"

"Just showing YN the local cuisine," Franco says smoothly, though you notice his ears turning slightly pink.

"Right, right," Lando drawls, his eyes dancing with amusement. "The local cuisine. In your nice shirt. At that fancy place you've been talking about for weeks-"

"Goodbye, Lando," you cut him off, grabbing Franco's arm and steering him toward the exit, trying to ignore Lando's knowing chuckle behind you. You knew it was a matter of time before the entire grid finds out you went out with Franco.

The restaurant is everything Franco promised and more. The conversation flows easily between you, and you find yourself charmed by the way he seamlessly switches between Spanish and English while ordering, the way he leans in slightly when you're talking, the way his hand occasionally brushes yours across the table.

"No way," you laugh, taking another sip of wine. "You did not challenge your friend to a dance-off."

"I absolutely did," Franco grins. "And I won, by the way. Though there might have been some tequila involved."

"I would pay good money to see that."

"Play your cards right," he says with a playful wink, "and maybe you'll get a private demonstration."

The flirtatious comment catches you off guard, and you feel heat rise to your cheeks. Franco seems pleased with this reaction, his confidence growing throughout the evening.

The evening continues, warm and comfortable. Franco insists on ordering dessert - "You haven't lived until you've tried their churros con chocolate" - and you find yourself sharing stories between bites of perfectly crispy churros.

"So," Franco says, wiping chocolate from his lip with a napkin, "you, Oscar, and Logan - that's quite the trio. How did that happen?"

You laugh, fondly remembering those early days. "We practically grew up together in karting. I was this tiny kid trying to prove myself, Oscar was already sassy even at eight years old, and Logan… well, Logan was Logan."

"Let me guess - immediate chaos?" Franco grins.

"Oh, absolutely. We used to drive our parents and coaches crazy. These three kids who wouldn't stop racing each other even after practice was over." You smile at the memory. "We've been inseparable ever since. Though now Logan's living his best life in Florida."

Franco's eyes soften. "You really miss having him in the paddock, don't you?"

"Yeah," you admit quietly. "I do. But he's happy, and that's what matters. Plus, he texts me stupid memes at least twenty times a day, so it's like he never left."

After asking for the bill — one that Franco didn't let you pay no matter how much you insisted — you decided to walk back to the hotel. You were aware that his hand was close to yours as you walked side by side, almost brushing your fingers, but you didn't dare to take that step, and neither did he.

You reach the hotel, but instead of heading straight for the elevators, Franco suggests taking the scenic route through the garden. The night is too nice to end just yet.

"I have to say," he remarks as you walk, "you look beautiful tonight. That dress is…" he makes an exaggerated chef's kiss gesture, making you laugh.

"Smooth, Colapinto. Very smooth."

"I try," he winks, and you roll your eyes but can't hide your smile.

The walk to your room comes too quickly. Outside your door, Franco turns to you with a soft smile.

"Thank you for tonight," he says. "It was… nice. Really nice."

"It was," you agree, finding yourself meaning it completely. "Thank you for showing me your favorite spot."

There's a moment where you both just look at each other, the air charged with something unspoken. Franco takes a small step closer, then seems to think better of it.

"Goodnight, YN," he says softly, squeezing your hand once before letting go.

"Goodnight, Franco," you reply, watching him head down the hallway.

As you close the door behind you, you lean against it, smiling to yourself. You can already hear Max's smug "I told you so" tomorrow, but somehow, you can't bring yourself to care.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

liked by username1, username2 14,892 users

f1gossip🚨 Franco Colapinto and YN spotted having dinner together in Mexico City. They spent over two hours at the restaurant according to witnesses.

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username2 This is getting interesting... 👀

username3 STOP I'M CRYING 😭❤️

username4 they're just friends guys, calm down

username4 the way he makes her laugh though!!!

username5 watch how they'll deny everything tomorrow

username6 MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS

username8 this has to be more than just friendship...

username10 I MANIFESTED THIS

username12 focus on racing instead of dating maybe?

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

The Brazilian rain hammers down relentlessly on the Interlagos circuit. It's barely 6 AM, but the paddock is already buzzing with nervous energy for the early sprint qualifying. You stifle a yawn as you check your phone for what must be the hundredth time that morning. Another message from Franco pops up - a picture of himself looking comically miserable in the rain with the caption "Maybe if we all pretend we didn't see the rain, they'll cancel quali?"

The past week has been unexpected in the best way possible. After that dinner in Mexico, something shifted. What started as sharing breakfast in the hotel turned into spending every free moment together. During the long flight to São Paulo, George had dramatically sighed and switched seats with Franco, muttering something about "not being able to take the longing looks across the plane anymore."

"Someone's cheerful for 6 AM," Max comments, walking into the garage as you quickly type a response to Franco. "Let me guess - Argetinian company keeping you entertained?"

You try to hide your smile but fail miserably. "Shut up and focus on qualifying."

"Oh, I'm focused," he grins. "Unlike someone who keeps looking at their phone every two minutes."

"I'm just-"

"YN," Max interrupts, counting off on his fingers, "he waited outside our debrief yesterday just to walk you to dinner. He somehow always knows your coffee order. And don't think I didn't notice him giving you his jacket yesterday."

You feel your cheeks heat up. "We're just friends."

"Right," Max smirks. "Friends. Like how Charles and I are 'just friends' when we're trying to punt each other off track."

"Shut up, as if you weren't secretly in love with each other."

A few hours later, as you prepare for the drivers' parade, Oscar sidles up next to you with his trademark grin.

"Well, well, if it isn't the stranger," he says dramatically. "Remember me? One of your best friends? Though I suppose you wouldn't know, being attached at the hip with a certain Williams driver these days."

You roll your eyes, but there's no heat in it. "Miss me that much, Piastri?"

"Just saying, used to be we'd get coffee before parade, now it's all 'Sorry Oscar, Franco already got me coffee,'" he mimics your voice terribly.

You're about to retort when Franco appears, and Oscar's grin widens. "And that's my cue. Have fun, kids!" He winks before sauntering off.

"Ignore him," you say when you notice a small smile in Franco's face, "He's the perpetual pain in my ass."

"He's okay," Franco says, standing closer to you. You're trying to get your hair in order when you realize something's missing.

"Shit," you mutter, patting your pockets. "I forgot my hair tie."

"You always braid it before races, right?"

"Yeah," you sigh, still searching. "I'm stupidly superstitious about it. Haven't gotten into the car without a perfect braid since F3."

"Here," Franco pulls a hair tie from his wrist. At your surprised look, he shrugs. "I started carrying one after Mexico. Just in case," he shrugs, as if he was saying the most obvious thing ever, "Turn around."

"You know how to braid hair?"

"Sisters, remember? I'm practically a professional." His fingers are gentle as they work through your hair. "Besides, can't have you breaking your streak because of a missing hair tie."

You're acutely aware of the other drivers watching with varying degrees of amusement. Lewis gives you a knowing wink as he passes, while Charles not-so-subtly elbows Oscar and gestures toward you two.

"There," he says finally, securing the end with your hair tie. "Perfect braid for perfect racing."

You reach back to feel it - it is indeed perfect. When you turn to thank him, you find him much closer than expected, his eyes soft as they meet yours.

"Show off," you manage to say, trying to ignore the way your heart is racing.

"Only for you," he replies with a wink, and you hear what sounds suspiciously like Alex whispering "Just kiss already" to George.

The moment is broken by the announcement for drivers to take their places on the parade truck. As you climb aboard, you catch Oscar making exaggerated swooning gestures at you, while Max simply mouths "Just friends?" with a knowing smirk.

Franco takes his place beside you on the truck, close enough that your shoulders touch, and somehow you find you don't really care who's watching.

"Nice braid, by the way," Charles calls out teasingly from behind you. "Franco, think you could do mine next time?"

"Get your own hair stylist, Leclerc," you call back, and Franco's laugh next to you makes everything - the bad qualifying, the rain, the teasing - worth it.

The truck starts moving, and Franco's hand finds yours, hidden from view between you. You intertwine your fingers with his, and neither of you let go for the entire parade.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

liked by username1, username2 and 21,765 others

f1_insider🚨 Christian Horner spotted leaving Williams hospitality after a 2-hour meeting in Brazil. This comes amid increasing speculation about driver changes for 2025.

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username1 They're not even trying to be subtle anymore…

username2 leave YN alone challenge

username3 Franco to Red Bull confirmed? 👀

username5 WAIT WHAT

username7 the timing of this… right before quali 😬

username8 everyone acting surprised like this hasn't been brewing for weeks username11 They're trying to destabilize her before the race

liked by maxverstappen1, carlossainz55 and 2,093,032 others

yourinstagram brazil never disappoints. p15 ➡️ p2. proud of this one.

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username1 IM STILL CRYING

username2 MIC DROP

maxverstappen1 Proper racing today 💪🏻 That defense in the last 10 laps 🔥Love you kiddo, couldn't ask for a better teammate

↳ username1 max said SHE'S NOT GOING ANYWHERE

danielricciardo THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT! That's my girl!

username3 EVERYONE'S PRIDE AND JOY

username4 she got lucky and still no win this season

landonorris Absolute monster in the wet

logansargeant THAT'S MY BEST FRIEND

username5 this is why she deserves that seat

username6 where are all the haters now? 🤫

username7 that battle through the midfield was masterclass

username8 Silencing critics in the best way possible

liked by username1, username2 and 14,088 others

f1gossip YN's radio messages during Franco's crash show a different side to their "rivalry." Listen to how her voice changes when she finds out it's him. Sometimes the real feelings come through in moments like these.

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username2 this doesn't sound like someone who "hates" him

username3 top I'm crying 😭

username4 "tell me he's okay" broke me

username6 forget the rivalry narrative, that's genuine concern

username7 MY DRIVERS STOOOOP

username8 this is the most emotion we've heard from her all season

username9 notice how she's been cold towards him for weeks but the second he's in danger…

username10 SOMETHING SHIFTED

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

The easy banter has become your normal over the past week. Ever since Brazil, where you fought your way from P15 to P2 in treacherous conditions, something has shifted between you. The walls you'd carefully maintained started crumbling during that rain-soaked weekend.

Your phone buzzes again - this time it's Christian Horner requesting a meeting. Your stomach tightens instinctively. These meetings have become more frequent throughout the season, always with subtle undertones about your future with the team.

Franco: "Meeting with James in 10. Wish me luck not falling asleep in the sim debrief. Call you after?"

You: "Sure, good luck x"

The 'x' slips out before you can stop it - you've never added that before. Your finger hovers over the delete button, but he's already seen it.

Franco: "Did THE YN just send me a kiss? Screenshots being taken. This is historic

You're still smiling about your early interaction with Franco when you walk into Christian Horner's office, but his expression is serious enough to make your smile fade. You've been here before - these "casual meetings" that could determine your future.

"YN, thanks for making time," he gives a polite smile, "Please, take a seat."

You sit, trying to read his expression. Last week's podium trophy sits on a shelf behind him - your trophy, earned after fighting through half the grid.

"As you're aware, your contract includes certain performance clauses. While your recent results, particularly Brazil, have been impressive, we need to consider all options for the team's future."

That familiar knot in your stomach returns. "What kind of options?"

"I was at Williams recently," Christian says carefully, "discussing various possibilities, including Franco Colapinto."

The world seems to tilt slightly. Franco. At Williams. Meeting about possibilities. Just like with Logan.

"I got P2 in Brazil," you say, hating how defensive your voice sounds. "Started P15. In the rain. I battled with the entire grid while also defending for Max to secure a double podium."

"Yes, and it was an exceptional drive-"

"I'm fifth in the championship. I've scored podiums consistently despite the car being a nightmare to drive most of the times. What more do I need to do?"

Christian's expression remains neutral. "This isn't about any single result, YN. We need to evaluate all potential scenarios for the team's future."

"So you're considering replacing me," you say flatly. "With Franco."

"I trust you understand this is just business, YN," Christian says as you stand to leave. "We have to explore every option."

You pause at the door, turning back slightly. "Of course. Business." Your voice is perfectly controlled. "Just like my P2 in Brazil was business. My podiums were business. Everything I've given to this team has been business."

"YN-"

"No, I get it. Really." You manage a smile that doesn't reach your eyes. "If you'll excuse me, I have some sim work to review."

It hits you as you drive back to your apartment - every friendly conversation, every shared coffee, every late-night text… none of it was real. Franco isn't your friend. He's just another driver who sees you as an obstacle to overcome, a seat to claim. Just like everyone else since you entered F1, smiling to your face while plotting to take what's yours.

Back in your apartment, your phone keeps lighting up with Franco's messages, each one making your chest tighter. You can't bring yourself to block him - that feels too much like acknowledging how much this hurts. Instead, you just... stop responding. Set the phone aside. Focus on your laptop, on race data, on anything else.

Your phone rings - Oscar's familiar face popping up on the screen.

"Finally!" he exclaims when you answer. "I've been trying to reach you all day. You missed the most hilarious thing - Lando tried to make vegemite pasta."

Despite everything, you find yourself smiling. "Please tell me someone filmed it."

The conversation flows easily, almost making you forget about everything else. Almost.

"Oh yeah," Oscar adds casually, "ran into Franco at paddle today. He seemed pretty worried-"

"He better focus on preparing for his Red Bull seat instead."

"His what?" Oscar sounds confused. "Stinks, what are you on about?"

"Horner had meetings at Williams. About Franco. About possibilities. Sound familiar?"

"Hang on, hang on. Did you even talk to Franco about this? Because he genuinely seemed concerned-"

"Of course he seemed concerned, Os. That's the whole point."

"YN, I know you. You're doing that thing where you push people away before they can hurt you. But stinks, I really don't think-"

"I have to go. Sim data to review."

"At least talk to him-"

You end the call, turning back to your laptop. Three races left. Three chances to prove everyone wrong. No more distractions, no more letting your guard down.

You'll do it the only way that matters in F1 - on track, where lap times speak louder than friendly texts, and championship points mean more than shared coffee breaks.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

You've managed three weeks. Three weeks of perfectly crafted indifference, of calling him "the Williams driver" in interviews, of taking different routes through the paddock just to avoid those chance encounters that used to make your heart skip. Three weeks of pretending you don't miss his stupid sparkle messages, or the way he always saves you a coffee during early practice sessions.

But now your hands won't stop shaking as you stare at your dark phone screen, trying to ignore the screens showing the mangled Williams in the Las Vegas Strip. You've watched the replay seventeen times without meaning to, each time feeling your heart stop at the impact.

"This is getting ridiculous," Max's voice is quiet beside you, making you jump. You didn't even hear him approach. "Stop with this nonsense."

"I'm fine," you respond automatically, thumb still pretending to scroll on your black screen. "Just checking the timing sheets."

"Your phone isn't even on." Max's hand appears, gently taking the phone from your trembling grip. "They've taken him to UMC. Just go."

"I can't," you whisper, finally looking up at your teammate. You hate how your voice catches. "Everyone will—"

"Who cares what everyone will say?" Max interrupts, already reaching for your bag. "Hannah's got a car waiting. Go."

"I don't want to," you protest weakly, but even you can hear how unconvincing it sounds. "I don't need to—"

"Stop," Max's voice is firm but gentle. "You're not going back to this. Not after everything. You care about him, stop pretending you don't."

You take a shaky breath, then nod once. You're out of the garage before you can change your mind and rebuild those walls you've spent three weeks perfecting. Because Max is right – you do care. You care so much it terrifies you. And right now, nothing else matters except knowing he's okay.

You hate hospitals. You've spent too many hours in them after your own crashes, but somehow this is worse. Standing outside his room, you're suddenly unsure of everything. Three weeks of carefully constructed distance seems ridiculous now.

"You can come in instead of hovering at the door," Franco's voice carries from inside, slightly hoarse but still holding that hint of amusement that always used to drive you crazy. "Unless you're planning to run away again."

You step inside, trying to maintain some composure even as your heart clenches at the sight of him. "I wasn't running away," you say automatically, but it sounds weak even to your ears.

"No?" He raises an eyebrow, wincing slightly at the movement. "So you just happened to take different paddock routes?"

"Franco—"

"It's back to Franco now? Not 'the Williams driver'?" There's hurt beneath his teasing tone, and it makes your chest tight. "That last interview was particularly cold, by the way. Very convincing."

You stay by the door, arms crossed. "I thought that's what everyone wanted. Space. Distance. Rivalry."

"You're here now though."

"Max made me come," you lie.

"Sure he did." Franco's small smile tells you he sees right through you. "Nothing to do with how many times you asked if I was okay over the radio?"

You feel your cheeks heat up. Of course he's heard the radio already. "I would have asked about any driver."

"YN," his voice softens, and it breaks something in you. "Stop pretending. Please. I miss my friend."

The last words hit you hard, and you finally let your arms drop, taking a step closer. "I miss you too," you whisper, and it feels like admitting defeat and victory all at once. "I was so scared when I saw the crash."

"Come here," he says quietly, patting the edge of the bed.

You hesitate for just a moment before crossing the room, carefully sitting beside him. "I'm sorry," you say softly. "For these past weeks. For being harsh. For—"

"I know," he interrupts, his hand finding yours. "I know. But you're here now."

You squeeze his hand gently, feeling the walls you've built crumbling completely. "You could have died today and I would have never—" you stop yourself, running your thumb over his knuckles without thinking. "All because of this stupid seat."

Franco's quiet for a moment, then lets out a small laugh that turns into a wince. "Is that what you think? That I'm after your seat?"

"Aren't you?" You try to pull your hand away but he holds on. "The meetings with Christian, the—"

"YN," he interrupts, waiting until you look at him. "I never got any offers from RedBull.”

You freeze. "What?"

"I'm not taking your seat," he says softly. "In fact, I still don't have a seat."

"But...the meetings with Horner?" You're struggling to process this. "He basically told me they were considering options for next season, and those options were you in my seat."

"Sounds to me that he was pressuring you." His eyes hold yours. "My team had meetings with RedBull, yes. But we never got a solid offer, not even for VCARB."

You feel slightly dizzy. Three weeks of avoiding him, of building up walls, of convincing yourself he was just another driver trying to take your seat...

"I'm an idiot, aren't I?" you finally manage.

"Well, you've taken the long way through the paddock just to avoid me," he teases, then becomes serious. "I wouldn't hurt you like that. You know that. Or at least, you used to."

"I got scared," you admit quietly. "When I heard about the meetings, I just... it was easier to push you away than to admit that I care about you."

The silence that follows feels heavy with everything unsaid. Finally, Franco squeezes your hand gently.

"Well," he says softly, "nearly dying seems to have worked out well for me then."

"That's not funny," but you're fighting a smile.

"Made you come see me though, didn't it?"

"I hate you," but there's no heat in it.

"No, you don't," he says confidently. "You just admitted you care about me. No taking it back now."

You roll your eyes but don't deny it. "How are you feeling, really?"

"Like I crashed a car at 200mph," he grins, then softens. "Better now though."

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

liked by francolapinto, maxverstappen1 and 1,908,479 others

yourinstagram champion x4 🏆so proud to be part of this journey. no one deserves it more than you @/maxverstappen1. thank you for being the best teammate anyone could ask for, on and off track.

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username1 IM CRYINGGGGG

username2 this is my family

maxverstappen1 Couldn't ask for a better teammate and bonus little sister. Thanks for having my back all season 💪🏻

↳ username1 HE SAID SHE'LL ALWAYS BE MY TEAMMATE

danielricciardo Look at my kids making me proud 🥹

christianhorner Fantastic team effort all year. Proud of both of you.

↳ username1 FIX HER CAR AND STOP FEEDING HER TO THE PRESS!!

username5 the way max waited to celebrate until she crossed the finish line

username6 remember when they said they wouldn't get along

username7 brother sister energy we love to see it

francolapinto Amazing work 🙌

↳ username8 bro ready to take her seat

username9 their relationship is too pure. max adores her like she's his little sister and yn would take a murder charge for him pretty much

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

After showering and changing post-race, you're walking back to your hotel room when your phone buzzes. Franco's name lights up the screen: "Hey... could you come to my room? Need to get my mind off today. Room 412."

You hesitate only briefly before responding. After everything that's happened - the crash, the hospital, the conversations that followed - things between you have felt different.

Qatar had been grueling, you managed to score a solid P4 but the story for Franco had been different. He was part of a collision during turn one that ended his race right there. You heard it on the radio and your heart couldn't help but ache for him.

When you knock, Franco opens the door looking drained, his usual spark dimmed by the day's events. He's changed into soft sweatpants and a team shirt, hair still damp from his shower.

"That bad, huh?" you say softly, following him into the room.

He drops onto the bed with a sigh. "First lap incidents are the worst. All that preparation, all those hours in the sim… gone in seconds."

You settle into the armchair across from him. "I saw the replay. That wasn't your fault - Hulkenberg came across way too aggressively."

"Doesn't matter whose fault it was. Points are points, and I need them." He runs a hand through his hair, a gesture you've come to recognize as stress. "The pressure's getting intense. Everyone keeps asking about next year's plans, and I just… I don't know."

"Hey," you say gently, moving to sit beside him. "You're one of the most talented drivers out there. Everyone sees it."

"Do they?" His voice is uncharacteristically vulnerable. "Because right now it feels like every mistake is being magnified. One DNF and suddenly everyone's questioning if I deserve the seat."

"I know that feeling too well," you admit. "I mean, I spent three weeks avoiding you because I thought you were after my seat."

That draws a small laugh from him. "Not my finest moment in the hospital, guilt-tripping you about it."

"It worked though, didn't it?" you nudge his shoulder playfully, "Plus, I guilt tripped you about Logan's seat for the longest time, it's only fair."

"Yeah, well, I was desperate. Do you know how hard it was watching you take different routes through the paddock just to avoid me?"

"About as hard as it was taking those routes," you say softly. "I missed you."

"You did manage to find some creative paths though," he teases, his mood lightening slightly. "I particularly enjoyed watching you duck behind Lando in the airport."

"I did not duck!"

"You absolutely did. Practically dove behind him. Poor guy had no idea why you suddenly needed an urgent conversation about sim settings."

You feel your cheeks heat up. "Well, what about you? Mr. 'Oh sorry, I didn't see you there' when we literally made eye contact in the media pen?"

"That was Oscar's fault! He told me my hair looked weird and I got distracted."

"Your hair always looks weird."

He gasps in mock offense. "Take that back! This hair has its own fan accounts."

"Yeah, horror fan accounts maybe," you tease.

"Says the person who needed my expert braiding skills before races."

"Which you learned from your sisters, if I remember correctly?"

His expression softens. "Actually… I might have YouTube'd it after Mexico."

That catches you off guard. "You… what?"

"Yeah," he rubs the back of his neck, suddenly looking sheepish. "Spent like three hours practicing on a rope I found in the gym. Alex caught me and wouldn't stop laughing."

"That's…" you feel something warm bloom in your chest. "That's actually really sweet."

"Don't tell anyone," he grins. "I have a reputation to maintain."

"Oh yeah? What reputation is that?"

"You know, cool, mysterious, definitely not the type to watch hair braiding tutorials."

You laugh. "Hate to break it to you, but anyone who's seen you try to work the coffee machine knows you're not mysterious."

"That machine is complicated!"

"It has three buttons!"

"Three very confusing buttons," he protests. "Besides, you're the one who always shows up right when I'm struggling with it."

"Pure coincidence."

"Right," he smirks. "Just like how you 'coincidentally' started showing up earlier to breakfast after I mentioned that's when I usually go?"

You feel your cheeks warm again. "I just… wanted to beat the rush."

"The rush of exactly two other drivers who eat that early?"

"Shut up," you mutter, but you're smiling.

The air between you changes, becomes charged with everything unsaid. You're suddenly very aware of how close you're sitting, how his eyes have dropped to your lips.

He doesn't say anything else, instead, he leans forward and kisses you, soft and careful, like he's afraid you might pull away. His hand comes up to cup your cheek, and you feel yourself melting into the touch.

When he pulls back, you blink at him, slightly dazed. "You kissed me."

His familiar smirk returns, though his eyes remain soft. "Well done, Sherlock."

You roll your eyes at his sass, but can't help smiling. This time, you're the one who leans in, capturing his lips with yours. The kiss is deeper, more certain. His hand slides into your hair as you press closer, and you feel him smile against your mouth.

"You know," he says softly, playing with a strand of your hair, "besides being one of my racing idols, you've also always been my crush."

You pull back slightly, raising an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Don't let it go to your head," he grins.

"Oh my god," you laugh. "You were such a fan! Did you have posters too?"

He groans, hiding his face in your shoulder. "I'm never telling you anything again."

"No, no, this is great," you tease. "I'm just a year and a half older than you, Colapinto, and you completely idolized me."

"I hate you," he mumbles into your shoulder.

"No you don't," you say confidently. "You just admitted you had a crush on me."

He lifts his head, eyes sparkling with that familiar mischief. "Still do, actually. Although the real you is much more annoying than poster you."

"Poster me didn't call you out on your coffee machine struggles."

"Poster you was much nicer," he agrees, but he's smiling as he leans in to kiss you again.

This kiss is slower, deeper, filled with everything you've both been holding back. When you finally pull apart, you rest your forehead against his.

"Been wanting to do that for a while," he admits softly.

"Even when I was avoiding you? Or giving you crap to defend my best friend's honor?"

"Especially then. Do you know how adorable you looked trying to pretend you didn't see me in the paddock?"

"Shut up," you laugh.

"Never," he grins, pulling you closer. "I have years of fan stories to make up for."

You kiss him again just to shut him up, but you can feel him smiling against your lips, and you think maybe, just maybe, this is exactly where you're meant to be.

"You're never going to let me live down the fan thing, are you?" he asks when you break apart.

"Not a chance," you smirk. "I bet Alex has pictures of you practicing those braids too."

"Don't you dare!"

But you're already reaching for your phone, laughing as he tries to grab it from you, and somehow you end up tangled together on the bed, both laughing too hard to care about anything else.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

You're halfway through your coffee when Franco appears, wearing his team polo and that signature grin that used to irritate you but now makes your stomach flutter. It's still surreal how much has changed - from despising him for taking Logan's seat, to avoiding him over your seat rumors, to… whatever this is now. He slides into the seat next to you, leaning in for a kiss. You quickly place a hand on his chest, pushing him back playfully.

"Easy there, hotshot," you tease. "Let's keep it professional."

"Professional?" He raises an eyebrow, that mischievous glint in his eyes. "Come on, don't be shy now. Not after last week."

You feel your cheeks warm at the memory. "Last week was different. We were alone."

"Oh, so that's the rule? Only when we're alone?" He leans closer, lowering his voice. "Should we discuss what else happened when we were alone?"

"Franco!" You swat his arm, but you're fighting a smile.

"What? I'm just saying, for someone who used to avoid me like I had the plague, you sure changed your tune."

"Yeah, well," you stir your coffee, trying to maintain your composure, "turns out you're not as annoying as I thought."

"High praise," he chuckles. "Remember when you wouldn't even look at me in driver briefings?"

"Remember when you replaced my best friend and then tried to steal my seat?"

"I didn't try to steal your seat!" he protests. "That was all media speculation."

Before you can respond, Max drops into the seat across from you, already looking amused at finding you two together.

"Well, well," he says, reaching for the coffee pot. "If it isn't my favorite teammate and her… what are we calling this now?"

You roll your eyes. "We're calling it none of Max's business."

"Everything is Max's business," Max says cheerfully. "Especially when said business involves my teammate getting cozy with the competition."

Franco's phone buzzes and his expression shifts slightly as he reads the message, and you catch that flicker of worry he's been trying to hide all weekend. The weight of it being potentially his last race in F1 has been hanging over both of you.

"Engineers?" you ask softly.

"Yeah," he sighs. "Last pre-race meeting of the season. Hopefully not my last ever," he adds, attempting a joke that falls flat.

You reach for his hand under the table, giving it a quick squeeze. "Hey, you've shown what you can do this year. The pace is there, the talent is there-"

"The results aren't," he cuts in, running his free hand through his hair. "DNF and crashes don't exactly scream 'keep me for next year.'"

"The car's been shit though," Max speaks up, "Everyone knows that. You've outqualified your teammate and scored points."

"Try telling that to the team principals," Franco says, attempting a smile that doesn't reach his eyes. "Anyway, better go before they add 'chronically late' to my resume." He stands, leaning down to kiss your cheek. "See you later?"

"Of course," you say softly. "Good luck in the meeting."

Once Franco leaves, Max leans forward, "Okay, spill. Everything. Now."

"There's nothing to spill."

"Nothing to spill?" Max scoffs. "Last month you were convinced he was plotting to take your seat, and now he's kissing you goodbye at breakfast? That's not nothing."

"You don't need to know everything about my life, Max," you try to busy yourself with your coffee, that's pretty much cold by now.

"I'm the older brother you never wanted but got stuck with anyway, so I do need to know about these things."

You sigh, knowing he won't let this go. "Fine. After Qatar, things changed. We… spent time together."

"Spent time together?" Max wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.

"Not like that!" you protest, then lower your voice. "Well, not just like that. We talked a lot. About everything again - the rumors, the misunderstandings, why I was so angry about Logan, and… I don't know. It's different now. Good different. When I'm with him, everything just feels…" you trail off, searching for the right words.

"Right?" Max supplies, his teasing tone softening.

"Yeah," you admit. "Which makes this whole situation even harder. If he doesn't get a seat…"

"Then you'll figure it out," Max says, "But let's not write him off yet. Season's not over until the checkered flag."

You nod, but can't help glancing at the door Franco left through. "You know what's ironic?" you say, turning back to Max. "A few months ago, I was worried about him taking my seat. Now I'd give anything for him to have one, anywhere on the grid."

Max smiles knowingly. "Amazing what a few kisses can do."

"It's not just that," you protest. "He deserves to be here. He's so talented-"

"And you're completely smitten," Max interrupts, grinning.

"Shut up," You throw a napkin at him. "I'm getting a new teammate next year," you declare.

"No you're not," Max laughs. "You love me." He pauses, suddenly looking both nervous and excited. "Actually… want to know a secret?"

Something in his tone makes you lean forward. "Always."

"Kelly's pregnant," he says, a huge grin spreading across his face. "We just found out last month"

You practically leap across the table to hug him, nearly knocking over both your coffees in the process. "Oh my god! Max! I'm going to be an auntie!"

He laughs, hugging you back. "Actually…" he pulls back slightly to look at you, "What do you think about being a godmother?"

Your eyes widen. "Are you serious?"

"Of course," he grins. "Who else would I trust to teach my kid how to properly terrorize the paddock?"

You feel tears welling up in your eyes. "I'm going to spoil them so much," you warn, hugging him again. "Like, an absolutely ridiculous amount."

"I know," he laughs. "That's kind of counting on it."

"Does anyone else know?"

"Just family for now," he says. "And you, obviously. Because you are family."

You're definitely crying now. "I hate you for making me cry before a race weekend."

"Sure you do," he grins. "Just like you hate Franco, right?"

You wipe your eyes, deciding to ignore his comment. "God, I can't believe you're going to be a dad!"

"Me neither," he admits, and there's something soft and vulnerable in his expression that makes your heart squeeze. "It's scary but… in a good way, you know?"

"You're going to be amazing," you tell him seriously. "The best dad ever."

His smile turns mischievous. "Just wait until Franco gets you pregnant-"

"And that's my cue to leave," you gather your things. "Congratulations again, future dad. I love you, even when you're the worst."

His laughter follows you out of the room. "Love you too, future godmother!"

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liked by maxverstappen1, francolapinto and 2,099,437 others

yourinstagram ABU DHABI WINNER! 🏆✨ still feels surreal to type those words. to win the last race of the season, after everything… no words can describe this feeling. thank you to every single person who never stopped believing in me, even when things got tough. to my incredible team - this one's for you. we did it! 🧡

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username1 SHE FUCKING DID IT

username2 first win of the season in the last race - poetic justice

username3 the way everyone doubted her at the start of the season and now look at her QUEEN BEHAVIOR

logansargeant YESSSS! That move was legendary! So proud of you!

username4 this feels so RIGHT

francolapinto Mi campeona 🖤 That last lap move was 🔥

↳ username1 IM CRYING OMFG

↳ username2 THEY'RE SO TOGETHER I DON'T MAKE THE RULES

username5 brb i'll be crying while i watch that video of her hugging franco

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You're still riding the high of your Abu Dhabi win as you unlock your apartment door. Your first win of the season, in the last race - it feels poetic, somehow. Like a final "fuck you" to everyone who doubted you, who questioned your seat, who spent the entire season speculating about your future.

The trophy sits in your bag, along with the champagne bottle Charles insisted you keep. Franco follows you in, still wearing that soft smile he's had since he watched you cross the finish line.

He's staying at your apartment since he doesn't have a place in Monaco and the now traditional drivers dinner is happening, after all you time together, inviting him over felt...natural.

The past few days have been a whirlwind - the podium, the celebrations, the multiple kisses stolen in your motorhome between media duties. The flight to Monaco where you both pretended to sleep but kept "accidentally" touching hands. It should feel fast, rushed, but somehow it just feels right.

"Still can't believe you pulled that move on the last lap," Franco says, dropping his bags by the door. "Even Max was impressed, I think you broke his brain a little."

"Speaking of broken, try not to destroy anything while you're here," you tease. "Some of us actually live in Monaco full-time."

Franco turns to you with mock offense. "When have I ever broken anything?"

"Do you want the list chronologically or alphabetically?" you raise an eyebrow. "Because I distinctly remember a certain incident with Lewis' scooter…"

"That was a manufacturing defect and you know it," he protests, moving closer.

"Sure it was," you laugh. "Just like the tablet in Singapore was a 'technical malfunction'?"

He's close enough now that you can smell his cologne, the same one that's been driving you crazy since Qatar. "You're never going to let that go, are you?"

"Never," you confirm, but your voice comes out softer than intended because he's looking at you the way he has been since that first kiss in his room - like you're something precious.

"Guest room's down the hall," you say quickly, trying to maintain some semblance of control. "Bathroom's across from it, you know the drill."

Franco raises an eyebrow, that mischievous glint in his eyes that you're starting to know too well. "You're really going to make me take the guest room? After all our bonding?"

"Bonding?" you scoff. "Is that what we're calling it?"

"Well, what would you call making out in your motorhome? And the plane bathroom? And-"

You cut him off by pressing your hand to his mouth. "Those were… moments of weakness."

He kisses your palm before moving your hand, and the simple gesture shouldn't make your heart race like it does. "Lots of moments."

"I was emotionally vulnerable," you argue weakly.

"Uh-huh," he steps closer, backing you against the wall. "And now?Are you emotionally vulnerable now?" His hands find your waist, and you try to ignore how right they feel there.

"I'm…" you start, but then he's kissing you, slow and deep, and you forget what you were going to say.

When he pulls back, you're both breathing heavily. "We should get ready for dinner," you manage.

"We should," he agrees, but kisses you again.

"Franco," you mumble against his lips. "We're already late."

"Five more minutes," he murmurs, trailing kisses down your neck.

It ends up being fifteen minutes before you finally push him away, your lips swollen and hair slightly messed up.

"Guest room," you point firmly. "Get changed."

He grins, stealing one last quick kiss before grabbing his bag. "Yes, boss."

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yourinstagram has added to their close friends story

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You arrive at Lewis' Monaco penthouse a fashionably acceptable ten minutes late, Franco's hand resting casually on your lower back as the elevator opens to the top floor. The space is already filled with the familiar chatter of your fellow drivers, the city lights twinkling through the floor-to-ceiling windows.

"Look who finally made it," Charles calls out, a knowing smirk playing on his lips. "Got lost on the way from your apartment? It's only three blocks…"

"Traffic," you say smoothly, ignoring Franco's poorly concealed laugh beside you.

"Must have been terrible," Alex joins in, eyes twinkling. "Considering you live literally around the corner."

Lewis appears, saving you from having to respond. He hugs you warmly before turning to Franco with a grin. "No scooters allowed inside this time, mate."

"That was one time!" Franco protests as everyone laughs. "And it was definitely faulty manufacturing."

The evening flows easily, conversation and wine flowing freely as everyone celebrates the end of another season. You find yourself constantly aware of Franco's presence - the way he automatically hands you your favorite wine, how his hand finds yours under the table, the soft looks he gives you when he thinks no one's watching.

(They're all watching. These are racing drivers - subtlety isn't their strong suit.)

"Get together, everyone!" you call out later, holding up your phone. "I want a picture."

There's the usual chaos of twenty-odd drivers trying to arrange themselves, plenty of shoving and laughing as everyone finds their spot. Franco ends up behind you, his chest pressed against your back, hands resting lightly on your waist.

"Alright, someone else take it," Lando announces. "YN's too busy making heart eyes at Franco to frame it properly."

"I am not-"

"You kind of are," Pierre interrupts with a grin.

"Just like in Abu Dhabi," Oscar adds. "And the flight home. And baggage claim. And-"

"I hate all of you."

The night continues with more conversation, more drinks, and constant teasing from your friends. Even Charles joins in, muttering something about "finally dealing with all that sexual tension in the briefings."

By the time you leave, you're both pleasantly tipsy, walking back to your apartment with slightly unsteady steps. The moment your door closes behind you, the atmosphere shifts.

"So," he says finally, stepping closer. "About that guest room…"

"What about it?" you ask, but you're already moving toward him.

"I'm thinking," he cups your face with one hand, "that it would be a shame to use it."

"Would it?"

"Mhmm," he's close enough now that you can feel his breath on your lips. "Especially when the winner deserves proper celebrations."

"Or maybe you're just being a horndog," you tease, even as your hands find their way to his chest.

"Maybe," he concedes. "Or maybe I just can't stop thinking about kissing you."

Your breath catches. "You've already kissed me plenty today."

"Not enough," he murmurs, then proves his point by capturing your lips with his.

The kiss is different from all the others. Those were stolen moments, quick and heated. This is slower, deeper, like he's trying to memorize every second.

"Don't make me take the guest room," he murmurs against your lips.

You pretend to think about it, even as your hands slip under his shirt. "Well, since you asked so nicely…"

"I can be very nice," he grins, then kisses you again, backing you toward your bedroom.

"Prove it," you challenge.

The guest room remains empty that night. And many nights after.

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liked by pierregasly, francolapinto and 2,044,387 others

yourinstagram i love my little dysfunctional family !! yes i'm the one behind the camera

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username1 THIS IS LEGENDARY

username3 FRANCO'S FACE ??? DEVASTATED BC HIS GIRL IS NOT NEXT TO HIM

lewishamilton Always family ❤️

oscarpiastri Never sitting between you and your lover boy again..

↳ username1 HUH??

↳ username2 oscar spill the deets PLEASE

↳ logansargeant to the gc NOW

↳ username3 LET ME INNNNN

↳ username4 im crying

↳ yourinstagram i hate you both

francolapinto ❤️

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yn's biggest fans groupchat

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You're curled up on your couch, watching the lights of Monaco twinkle through your window as snow falls softly outside. Franco's just finished unpacking his bags, having arrived from Argentina an hour ago. The past weeks without him felt strangely empty, even though you'd been surrounded by family for Christmas.

"Mama keeps asking about the foods I mentioned you cook," Franco says, settling beside you with a grin. "She's convinced I'm making it up."

"Did you tell her it's mostly pasta and those empanadas you taught me to make?"

"Si, but she says my standards have dropped since moving to Europe," he laughs, stealing some of your blanket. "How was your family?"

"Good. Dad's still buzzing about Abu Dhabi. He's watched the replay about fifty times, especially that last lap battle with Max," you grin, throwing your legs over his lap. "How was home?"

"Hot," he sighs contentedly. "Really hot. Nothing like a proper Argentinian summer."

"Meanwhile I was freezing in London," you poke his side. "Speaking of which… don't you have some news to share?"

He raises an eyebrow. "How did you-"

"Carlos texted me. He's terrible at keeping secrets."

Franco runs a hand through his hair, a nervous gesture you've come to recognize. "I signed with Williams. As their reserve driver for next season, there's talk about 2026, but nothing concrete yet."

"Franco!" you exclaim, throwing your arms around him. "That's amazing!"

He hugs you back, letting out a relieved laugh. "You think so?"

"Of course I do!" you pull back to look at him. "Williams is doing great things, and with Carlos and Alex there…" you trail off, seeing something in his expression. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing bad," he assures quickly. "Just… I'll be based in England a lot. For simulator work and development."

"Oh," you say quietly, understanding dawning. You'd gotten used to having him here, in your space, in the paddock, in your life.

"Hey," he tilts your chin up. "It's not that far. And I'll still be at all the races. Plus," his lips quirk up, "I hear Nice has a pretty good airport."

You can't help but smile. "True. And I suppose I could be convinced to visit Grove occasionally."

"Only occasionally?" he teases.

"Well, I am very busy and important," you say loftily, making him laugh.

His eyes drop to your lips. "I'm sure you can save some time for me," he murmurs before closing the distance between you.

The kiss is soft and familiar, like coming home after a long trip. When you pull back, he's wearing that small smile that always makes your stomach flip.

You settle back against him, comfortable silence falling between you. "Talk to me about next season," he says eventually. "What's going on in that head of yours?"

"Honestly? I'm nervous," you admit. "Abu Dhabi was amazing, but what if it was just luck? What if I can't do it again?"

"The same way Suzuka was luck? And Singapore? And that insane qualifying in Baku?" Franco shifts to look at you properly, "You've been fast all season. Abu Dhabi just proved what everyone already knew."

"Smooth," you laugh, then remember something. "Oh! Speaking of next year - what are you doing for New Year's Eve?"

"Nothing yet. Why?"

"Logan's throwing a party in Florida for his birthday. Want to come?"

Franco hesitates. "Won't that be…"

"What? Weird because you stole his seat?" you tease, making him groan.

"I thought we cleared that up months ago," he protests.

"We did, I just like messing with you," you grin. "Come on, it'll be fun. There'll be cake."

“You know my weakness,” he sighs dramatically. “Does this mean I get to kiss you at midnight?”

“Bold of you to assume you’ll be my midnight kiss,” you tease, even as you lean into him.

“No? Planning on kissing someone else?” he raises an eyebrow, hands settling on your waist.

“Maybe. Logan might have a hot friend…”

"Terrible," he murmurs against your lips. "You're terrible."

"You like it," you whisper back, just before he kisses you again.

When you finally break apart, he's already reaching for the remote. "Want to watch Qatar?"

You groan, but you're smiling. "I hate you."

"No you don't," he says confidently, pulling up the race highlights.

And as he starts his terrible commentary, making you laugh despite yourself, you think about how easy this is - whatever this is between you. No labels, no pressure, just… this.

Outside, Monaco continues to sparkle under the falling snow, but in here, with Franco's warmth beside you and his voice in your ear pointing out "that brilliant move you did in turn 4" for the hundredth time, you think maybe some things don't need defining to be perfect.

Plus, you already know who your midnight kiss is going to be. Not that you'll tell him that - his ego's big enough as it is.

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liked by username1, username2 and 12,870 others

f1gossip Spotted: F1's power couple enjoying a day out in Monaco! Franco Colapinto and YN were seen strolling around today, looking very cozy! The pair, who have been subject to dating rumors seemed to have no interest in hiding their relationship anymore.

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username1 THE FUUUUUCK

username2 i don't like this..

username3 FRANCO GET AWAYYYY she's going to distract him

username4 why is this lowkey powerful

username5 THIS PLOT TWIST OMFG

username6 i thought they hated each other ??

username7 oh how the tables have turned

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Music pulses from Logan's Miami beach house as you and Franco make your way up the palm-lined driveway. The December air is surprisingly warm, fairy lights twinkling in every tree and reflecting off the pool visible through the floor-to-ceiling windows. Your hand is loosely intertwined with Franco's, something that still gives you butterflies even after weeks of... whatever this is between you.

"Birthday boy!" you call out as Logan spots you from the entrance, where he's greeting guests in a ridiculous party hat and an even more ridiculous Hawaiian shirt.

"If it isn't my best friend and the guy who stole my seat," Logan grins, pulling you into a tight hug before turning to Franco with an exaggerated suspicious look that quickly breaks into a genuine smile. "Good to see you, man."

"Happy birthday," Franco offers with a grin, accepting Logan's enthusiastic handshake-turned-hug. "Nice shirt."

"Right? YN said it was terrible, but what does she know about fashion?"

"Hey!" you protest, but you're laughing. "I have great taste."

Logan's eyes drift meaningfully to your joined hands. "Clearly," he smirks, making you blush and Franco chuckle. "Drinks are everywhere, food's by the pool, try not to fall in."

"That was one time," you mutter as Logan gets pulled away by more arriving guests.

Franco raises an eyebrow. "One time?"

"Don't ask. Come on, I need a drink before I tell you that story."

After getting drinks, you find yourself drifting between groups, Franco's hand a constant presence at the small of your back or linked with yours. It's nice, you think, not having to overthink every interaction, every touch. Here, away from the paddock and the cameras, you can just... be.

It's about an hour into the party when Logan finds you again, now sporting two party hats and what looks suspiciously like glitter on his cheek.

"Stinks! Just the person I wanted to see," he announces, dragging you away from where Franco is deep in conversation with Alex. "Back in five," he tells Franco with an exaggerated wink that makes you roll your eyes.

"Subtle," you comment as Logan leads you to the makeshift bar.

"Please, subtle went out the window when you two showed up holding hands like teenagers at prom," he snorts, mixing drinks with practiced ease. "Speaking of which..."

"Don't start," you warn, but you're fighting a smile.

"Me? Start something? Never," he puts a hand to his chest in mock offense. "I just find it interesting that the same person who spent three hours ranting to me about 'that arrogant Argentine who stole your seat' is now making heart eyes at him across my party."

"You're impossible."

"And you're happy," he says softly, his teasing tone giving way to something more sincere. "Like, really happy. I haven't seen you like this in… well, ever."

You look down at your drink, feeling your cheeks warm. "Yeah, well…"

"Hey," Logan nudges your shoulder. "It's a good thing. You deserve this, YN. Someone who gets you, who understands the pressure and the crazy schedule and still looks at you like you hung the moon."

"He doesn't-"

"He absolutely does. Trust me, I've been watching him watch you all night. It's disgustingly cute."

"I'm kind of scared, Logan," you look down at your hands nervously, "Six months ago, I hated him. And now I can't picture myself apart from him. It's all happening really fast and I'm not quite sure when everything shifted, but I feel like there's no going back now. And that's terrifies me."

"Stinks," Logan says gently, "you didn't hate him. You were hurt because of how everything went down with the seat, and you projected that onto him. I get being scared. This sport… it complicates things. But I've seen how he looks at you and how you look at him. It's okay to have feelings for him."

"How do you always know what to say?" you look up at him.

"Because I'm your best friend," he squeezes your shoulder. "Now go get your man. And please kiss him at midnight so I can win the bet with Alex."

"You bet on us?!"

"The whole grid did. I have fifty bucks riding on tonight!"

Later, as midnight approaches, you find yourself on the beach with Franco, fairy lights and stars twinkling above. Your conversation with Logan keeps playing in your mind, making you fidgety.

"You okay?" Franco asks softly, touching your arm.

"FIVE MINUTES!" someone shouts from the house.

"I have feelings for you," you blurt out. "Like, real feelings. And I know it's fast and complicated and I was horrible to you at first because I was hurt about the seat thing but then you were so nice and understanding and you brought me coffee after bad practice sessions and you defended me to the press and you make me laugh even when I'm trying to be mad and your accent gets thicker when you're tired which is unfairly adorable and-"

"THREE MINUTES!"

"-and sometimes I catch you looking at me in debriefs and it makes me forget what I'm saying and Oscar keeps making these knowing faces at us and I pretend to be annoyed but actually I kind of like it and-"

"SIXTY SECONDS!"

"-and I know this could complicate everything but I can't stop thinking about you and the way you smile when you see me in the morning and how you remember how I like my coffee and-"

"TEN! NINE! EIGHT!"

"-and maybe this is crazy but I really really like you and I know we should probably talk about what this means for next season but-"

"FOUR! THREE!"

"-and I just needed you to know-"

"TWO! ONE!"

Franco cuts off your rambling with a kiss, one hand cupping your face while the other pulls you closer. You melt into him as fireworks explode overhead, your heart racing for reasons that have nothing to do with the celebration around you.

When he pulls back, he's wearing that soft smile that always makes your stomach flip. "You're so cute when you rant."

"I don't rant," you protest weakly.

"Mi amor, you just spent ten minutes listing all the things you like about me, including my accent."

"Shut up."

He laughs, pressing his forehead to yours. "I want to be with you, YN. Officially, properly, no more undefined territory. I want everyone to know that you're mine and I'm yours. I want morning coffees and post-race celebrations and quiet moments like this. I want all of it, with you."

"Yeah?" you whisper, hardly daring to believe it.

"Yeah," he confirms, brushing his thumb across your cheek. "I'm crazy about you, in case my terrible attempts at flirting haven't made that obvious."

"Your flirting isn't terrible."

He kisses you again, laughing against your lips. "So… is that a yes?"

You pretend to think about it. "I don't know, Logan's friend is looking pretty good tonight…"

"Terrible," he murmurs, pulling you impossibly closer. "You're terrible."

"You like it," you smile, wrapping your arms around his neck.

"I like everything about you."

Your heart skips. "Everything?"

"Everything," he confirms. "Even your terrible taste in coffee."

You laugh, bright and happy, before pulling him down for another kiss. Around you, the party continues, music and waves and distant fireworks creating a perfect backdrop to this moment. When you finally break apart, you're both breathless and smiling.

"Happy New Year," you murmur.

"The happiest," he agrees, and as he leans in again, you think that maybe some feelings are worth being scared of, especially when they lead to moments like this.

Plus, you just won Logan a bet. Not that you'll tell him that.

[ihazyourkitty]

I really try to avoid fact checking people in public comment sections on the internet, but sadly this time I couldn't resist.

There was a reel on Facebook explaining the "sad" reason why cetaceans in human care often receive ice. It's because they're given "dead fish" you see, and these frozen thawed fish contain less moisture than the live fish they eat in the wild, so the ice helps prevent dehydration.

First of all, this is half true. The other half is that many cetaceans just love getting ice.

Supplemental hydration can also include gelatin and squid. The latter two are not unique to cetaceans btw. Squid and specially formulated gelatin based foods are also used in many fish diets in part to provide additional moisture. They also count as enrichment, depending on the context.

In any event, this creator thinks it's sad... that caretakers are providing their dolphins additional hydration? What, does he also think it's sad that they get vitamins? Reptile keepers regularly dust their animals' food with calcium to make sure they don't get metabolic bone disease. Is that also sad? These things are standard zoological practices, not signs of neglect. Wouldn't it be sadder if they didn't do that?

(Reason #423 why framing matters).

"But it's not natural!"

Neither is running on a treadmill, but that doesn't mean it's bad for you. Also, I'm pretty sure ICE is one of the most natural things you could use....

"Well why can't they just give them live fish!?"

Because the logistics of sustaining a live colony for such a purpose would be an expensive nightmare. Do you know how many pounds of fish these animals need to eat in a day? Using them as an occasional form of enrichment might be feasible, but on the regular? Just. No! Tell me you don't know how fish care works without telling me you don't know how fish care works!

It's cruel to the fish, for the same reason that it's cruel to feed snakes live food (assuming they aren't picky eaters). Fish are not just props, they are live animals that can experience stress and pain!

Freezing the fish helps keep it safe to eat.

"Why not just release them back into the wild?"

Because that would also be cruel since they wouldn't know how to survive. Next question.

"How do they get dehydrated when they live in water!?"

Oh man. Oh man oh man.

Cetaceans get most of their hydration from their diet. A quick google search indicted that they can drink some salt water, though I don't know how true that is, and to be clear, their kidneys are likely much more efficient at filtering out salt than ours (someone who knows more about this, please feel free to correct me). Regardless, most of their hydration comes from their food. Lack of food leads to dehydration, both in captivity and in the wild.

But there was one guy who said that dolphins in captivity can't drink the water because it's chlorinated. This is not true. The residual amounts of chlorine left after their water passes through filtration is no higher than what is in your tap water.

(Btw, this is another reason why live fish aren't typically used, because you don't house fish in systems that use chlorine, even in small amounts).

When I pointed this out to the guy, his response was that "most of their diet contains water from the exact same source."

To his credit, he did back down when I pointed out that this was wrong. But come my friends! As a fish person, let me explain to you why this is not correct!

Fish blood chemistry is not the same as the ambient water around them. They would not be able to maintain homeostasis otherwise. You see, their gills and kidneys help them osmoregulate.

Freshwater fish blood contains more salts than the surrounding freshwater, which means the via osmosis, water will enter the body, and unless they can compensate for this, the fish will swell up like a balloon, lose necessary salts, and basically drown. So what do they do? Their kidneys produce large amounts of dilute urine get rid of this extra water. Meanwhile, chloride cells in their gills take up ions from the water to transport into their blood.

Saltwater fish, however, have the opposite problem. Their blood has less salts than the surrounding water, so they need to get rid of extra salt. How? Well, they actually do drink the saltwater, and then their kidneys help filter out the extra salt. They basically produce very concentrated urine. But the kidneys cannot do this alone, so the chloride cells in their gills also help by basically working in reverse. They move extra ions out of the blood.

Elasmobranchs, crustaceans, mollusks and other marine mammals that may also make up some cetacean diets will have their own methods of osmoregulation.

All of this is to say, no, eating saltwater animals does not mean you're literally consuming ocean water, as these organisms have specific mechanisms for filtering out the excess salts.

This is, btw, why you can't just put a freshwater fish in saltwater or vice versa. They will die. Nor is this unique to fish, most organisms adapted for one environment don't thrive in the other.* Case in point: we cannot drink salt water, because our kidneys cannot handle that.

But some animals can! Take the salmon for instance. They hatch in freshwater environments, then move to saltwater, and then back when spawning season comes. How do they do this? Well, there are specific environmental/developmental triggers that cause their bodies to start osmoregulating in reverse. This does not happen instantaneously, however. They need time to adjust. They will migrate to brackish water, and allow their bodies a few days to adjust before continuing.

Some species of fish have higher tolerances for wider ranges of salinity/total dissolved solids (TDS) than others. Fluctuating these levels can actually trigger spawning in some species too! Discus, for instance, can be maintained in relatively harder freshwater than what they'd experience in the wild. But for breeding purposes, it's recommended to use softer water with lower a TDS. Given that discus can be more finicky, however, any of these adjustments should be made gradually.

On the other hand, there might be another species where a more sudden change is beneficial. Tropical fish native to floodplains that will experience sudden onsets of flooding from the rainy season, for instance, may need precisely that sudden rush of freshwater with lower pH and TDS to trigger spawning. Even if spawning isn't the end goal, simulating these seasonal fluctuations can be a very effective form of naturalistic enrichment!

....Oh dear, I went on a very nerdy tangent, because SCIENCE!!!! Enjoy.

*this can actually be taken advantage of in certain treatment contexts! Saltwater aquarists will sometimes do what is called a "freshwater dip", where the saltwater fish is very briefly immersed in freshwater to help rid them of harmful external parasites or bacteria. Usually, it's used when fish are first brought into quarantine. It's not 100% effective on its own, but it's one of the many tools in an aquarist's arsenal. Oh! This can also be used on sea turtles in some rescue situations! Again... SCIENCE!!! >:D

[musingsunderstarlight]

The only kool-aid they’ve drunk is of male supremacy. Religion is not the cause of men’s poor behavior; it is instead a tool that men like these use to enforce their cruelty. There is nothing in Islamic law that prohibits the training or existence of midwives, or female education at all, which is why the Taliban have not been able to fall back on it when providing justification every time they’ve issued another ban related to girls’ education. They will often cite lack of security, which is a bullshit excuse because they clearly have the firearms to protect their people, and lack of resources for girls' schools, which they will never invest in. For this last one, they haven’t even yet issued an official statement (every article I came across said they didn't, but if someone finds that they did please share), and they may never because they know it’s complete insanity.

I’ve said this before, but falling back on religion or any other factor as the single cause of misogyny other than the desire for male power and control in a culture absolves the men of any deliberation on their part and shuts down any realistic way to combat it. Men in any patriarchal society view any form of women’s access to autonomy as a threat to their own power, and this is just an extreme version of that (personally I also believe that these extreme bans are a form of punishment or revenge for the rights Pashtun women gained in the past decades). I recently read a study published in Sage Journals (linked below) that went in depth on examining why girls' education is such an obstacle in Pashtun culture (the main ethnic group of Afghanistan, and therefore the Taliban, as well as the Khyber Pakhtunkhwa province of Pakistan for those who don't know). Of course the consensus is that there are many barriers: "poverty, Pashtunwali (tribal code), religion, accessibility, resources, shortage of female teachers, curriculum, and political apathy and corruption." But reading this from a feminist lens, it's clear that the biggest obstacle that permeates all others is an effort to maintain the status quo through the structure of the family unit wherein the mother's role is strictly confined to homemaker and true societal power remains in the hands of men:

According to Pashtunwali, a woman’s life is centered in the home. She has predefined roles and responsibilities: homemaking, food preparation, and childbearing, which do not support her education. As described by a participant (F), “The old traditions of Pashtuns [Pashtunwali] compel Pashtuns to do such things [restrict her schooling]. He does not let her go out. She is stuck inside. This is embedded culture of the Pashtuns.” If a man is seen doing women’s work, he is ridiculed by his family and friends. A man is not supposed to work in the kitchen, take care of children, or do cleaning work at home. In one participant’s (H) words, "In mountainous areas, you know, water has to be brought from the outside. It is the job of women to bring water. If a man does it, then he is bullied and called various types of insulting names. They use a particular word for such a man: khazoonak [women’s puppet]. So people will say 'Boy, what a khazoonak.' So women bring the water, firewood. Women harvest crops. If a girl goes to school and then comes home to do her homework, then she can’t do these things."

I can't help but see the similarities between this mentality and the one echoed in these lines from Harrison Butker's commencement speech at Benedictine College:

I can tell you that my beautiful wife, Isabelle, would be the first to say that her life truly started when she began living her vocation as a wife and as a mother. I’m on the stage today and able to be the man I am because I have a wife who leans into her vocation. I’m beyond blessed with the many talents God has given me, but it cannot be overstated that all of my success is made possible because a girl I met in band class back in middle school would convert to the faith, become my wife, and embrace one of the most important titles of all: homemaker.

And then further down:

I say all of this to you because I have seen it firsthand how much happier someone can be when they disregard the outside noise and move closer and closer to God’s will in their life. Isabelle’s dream of having a career might not have come true, but if you asked her today if she has any regrets on her decision, she would laugh out loud, without hesitation, and say, 'Heck, no.'

I highly recommend reading the article from Sage Journals because the connection I want people to see here is that you should never underestimate what lengths men will go to in order to maintain—or regain—power over women and how easy it is to default to another excuse for it when you have successfully secured a woman's confinement to a role that grants her no financial power. There is nothing more harmful to a women's wellbeing than withholding income, which is achieved most effectively through confinement to the domestic sphere. And in both cases I've discussed here, women's education becomes a natural casualty.

A PDF version (hopefully this link works):

[lost-in-fandoms]

Winter Warmers Day 31: NYE countdown. Maxiel. About 1.5k words.

"Max, Maxy, Maximum, Maximus Prime!"

Max turns away from his conversation with Alex just in time to catch Daniel around the waist as he stumbles into him, the drink in his cup sloshing over his wrist.

"Hello, Daniel," Max says, unable to stop himself from smiling, readjusting his grip so that he can hold Daniel more comfortably.

From the corner of his eye he catches Alex moving away, probably deciding that their conversation is over now that Daniel has Max's attention. Which is a very fair assumption, given that in all the years they've been friends, Max has always dropped anyone and anything to focus on Daniel.

Some might call it pathetic, to still be in love with his best friend after so long, but Max doesn't really care about what other people think. He just cares about Daniel's warm weight in his arms, and the fact that when all the people at this party will have left their house, Daniel will still be there, probably moving stuff around to pretend he's helping with the clean up.

"Are you having fun, Daniel?" he asks, trying to maneuver them towards the kitchen, both to clean up Daniel's wrist before he complains about the stickiness and to not feel like every single person is staring at them.

Well, every single person other than Charles and Carlos, who seem to be trying to get acquainted with each other's tonsils.

"Yes," Daniel answers, letting himself be dragged away, stumbling unhelpfully on his own feet.

Once they're in the kitchen, occupied only by Logan and Oscar, heads bent over a phone, a half empty bottle of wine next to them, Max hoists Daniel on the counter, right next to the sink, swiping away a few empty paper plates.

"Stay still, please," he tells Daniel, grateful he doesn't have to shout as much over the music anymore. They should probably start lowering that actually, if they don't want the cops called on them again, but it's new year's eve, for sure old Meredith could let it slide this once.

He plucks Daniel's cup from his hand, something of not clear nature inside it, and wets a couple paper towels, gently wiping at his wrist and hand.

"Maxy," Daniel says, dropping his head forward to rest it on Max's shoulder. He's making Max's job harder like this, but Max is not going to complain. He just hums, showing Daniel he's listening.

"I have decided on my resolutions list," Daniel tells him, sounding slightly more sober than he did before.

Max drops the paper towels and grabs an empty cup, filling it with water from the sink and handing it to Daniel, coaxing him to raise his head to drink it.

Daniel had been talking about his resolutions list for more than a week. Max is not sure why he's so set on having new year's resolutions, since in the past eight years he's known him not once Daniel has been the kind of person who follows a plan, but he's been listening anyway every time he brought the topic up.

Max doesn't understand why he's having so much trouble creating the list either. Sure, Daniel does have his moments of perfectionism, but seeing him actually get stressed about this had been puzzling.

"Yeah? Can I know it?" he asks, dropping the now empty cup when Daniel hands it to him before opening his arms, letting Daniel comfortably slump into him again.

Somewhere on his left, Logan and Oscar leave the kitchen, closing the door behind them, cutting off a little more of the noises of the party, making Max feel like he's in his private Daniel bubble for the first time this evening.

He's not ashamed of saying that he's a bit possessive, greedy about having his fair share of Daniel's time, but he's gotten better with the years. The last time Daniel had been in a relationship, Max hadn't even tried to scare them off, but they had gone anyway after a couple of months, leaving a very mopey Daniel behind. Max had keyed their car.

"First thing, I want to learn how to play the banjo," Daniel says, way too loud way too close to Max's ear.

It makes Max smile anyway, knowing this point will be abandoned in a few months at most, just like every other instrument Daniel had tried to learn, getting bored with each one of them.

"Good start," he encourages anyway, because he's nothing but disgustingly soft when it comes to Daniel, even worse when he's tipsy like tonight.

He gets rewarded by Daniel pulling back to beam at him, before going back to Max's shoulder.

Sometimes holding himself back from kissing him takes all of Max's strength.

"Then, I want to improve my handwriting."

Yep, just as Max had thought. Another task that will be abandoned, like all the other times Daniel had tried before.

"I can read your handwriting," Max tells him, because it's true. No matter the kind of drunken chicken scratch he finds on the grocery list, Max has learned to interpret it all. It's not that hard really, when you manage to recognise the subtle differences between the squiggles. Part of the game is actually learning what is supposed to be a word and what is a doodle.

"You can, because you're great," Daniel mumbles against his shirt, as Max tries to pretend he can't feel himself blushing, "but I am so tired of people complaining about it."

"People should just learn how to read," Max tells him, unhappy with someone making Daniel feel like he should change. Which is very stupid, because Daniel is perfect, chicken scratches included.

It makes Daniel laugh, waist moving under Max's hands, his wet bottom lip dragging against the exposed part of Max's shoulder.

"Do you have any more?" he rushes to ask, trying to distract himself from the feeling of it.

In the other room, the music gets lowered, and for a second Max thinks it's the cops again, until he hears someone scream two minutes!

They should probably rejoin their friends, celebrate midnight with them, but Max is quite comfortable where he is, and he doesn't want to see Daniel grab someone to kiss, even if just to laugh about it afterwards.

He had long learned his lesson, after one year he had tried to angle himself in Daniel's line of view, just for him to reach around him and grab Charles instead. Max had gotten way too drunk that night.

"One more," Daniel says, voice even lower now that the music is off and they're so close. He sounds more hesitant suddenly, nervous fingers fidgeting with the hem of Max's shirt.

"Do you want to tell me?" Max asks, just to be sure. Sometimes Daniel needs a little push before he opens up, but it's always a very thin line between getting an answer and being shut out with a joke instead. This time Daniel nods.

"I want to suck your dick."

Max chokes on his spit, trying to push back Daniel to be able to see his face, feeling his eyes go wide.

It wouldn't be the first time they joke about it, but Daniel doesn't sound like he's joking, and if this is a prank Max is going to get very drunk again and probably go cry in the bathroom, but...

But when he manages to push Daniel's head up, he's blushing and he's looking at Max from underneath his lashes, fear and determination mixing on his face.

"You mean it?" Max forces himself to ask, sounding breathless. His heart is beating too fast, so loud he's sure Daniel can hear it too.

Daniel nods, one corner of his mouth turning up in a shadow of his usual smile.

"My last resolution is to stop lying to myself about my feelings for you," he says.

It echoes around his brain, bouncing around and amplifying: feelings for you feelings for you feelings for you feelings for you.

In the other room someone starts the countdown, and Max reaches forward, cupping Daniel's jaw with his hands.

"Are you gonna buy me dinner first?" he asks, just to see Daniel smile properly.

"Can I do it next year?"

Max rolls his eyes, but he still chuckles, weak for Daniel always, even when it's his bad jokes.

Three, two, one...

On the other side of the door sound explodes, their friends cheering and screaming, but Max barely hears it as he presses his lips against Daniel's.

(George screams when he opens the door to come grab the champagne chilling in the fridge and finds them making out against the counter, Max's thigh between Daniel's. The new wave of cheers that follows it is so loud Max starts mentally preparing his apologies for old Meredith and the cops, even as he copies Daniel in flipping them all off.)

[jimilter]

on the borderline — 05 | pjm. (m)

Park Jimin has been your buoy, your anchor and the ship of sanity that guides you to shore amid storms of self-doubt, nearly all your life; as have you been his. That is not to say nothing has ever brewed beneath the surface of platonic friendship, or that the two of you have never been victims to mistiming. Regardless, you would never risk the friendship you have with him now for anything. Even if you have to hurt him – or even yourself – in the process.

pairing: jimin x reader

rating: m (18+)

genre: angst | drama | friends to lovers!au

word count: 7.6 k

— warnings: swearing + repeated mention & description of sex (some gets detailed and explicit, hence the rating!) + mention of a past toxic relationship + perhaps a present toxic relationship? + the worst kind of emotional constipation + misunderstandings + lies and pretense +one-sided feelings + reader is a bigger mess + jimin is a mess too :/

— note: HAPPY NEW YEAR 2025, PEOPLE! <3 it was excruciating getting back into this one but it was also kinda therapeutic bec real life has been whooping my ass :( i have begun writing the sixth part too bec i truly forreal wish to complete this series without taking another year helP!

ps. the rating, genre and warnings mentioned above pertain to this chapter, only.

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𝐕 ⇢ 𝐀𝐁𝐘𝐒𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐀𝐁𝐘𝐒𝐌𝐀𝐋 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐓 ♪ between heaven and disaster

07:03 AM | Text Message from Grumpkin 🎃💖 hey sorry i missed all your calls and texts :( i figured u would ask abt seokjin and the date and i kinda didn’t wanna talk abt it not necessarily in a bad way just a “let me figure it out first” way which still doesn’t excuse ghosting u so i AM rly sorry :( how was your flight? and the dinner meeting?

07:16 AM ↳ SHE LIVES!!!!!! ↳ Good morning Grumpkincess <3 ↳ All that you said about your date has just made 1000x curious now yk ↳ Oh, and I had a horrible flight ↳ My partner drooled on my $70 shirt 😭 ↳ Barely had time to change it before our meeting at 4 UGH

Text Message from Grumpkin 🎃💖 good morning WHAT now ? that better not be a new pet name park jimin

↳ Yes it is, Grumpkincess ↳ A grumpy pumpkin princess ↳ Adorable right?

Text Message from Grumpkin 🎃💖 ykw your cringe ass deserved getting your shirt ruined karma 🖕

↳ Ihy 🖕 ↳ Ok enough of this can we pls talk???

Text Message from Grumpkin 🎃💖 ??? are we not talking?

Jimin rears back from his phone almost violently. Did you, of all people, really just imply that texting is equivalent to talking? He is pretty sure that of the entire time that the two of you have lived in separate towns, you have spent more than half of it on video calls with each other.

That is talking for the two of you.

Or at least it used to be, before he got onto this flight which has apparently landed him in some parallel universe. 

He immediately sits up in bed and calls you.

And you immediately disconnect the call.

What?

His jaw is still dropped when his phone vibrates in his palm again, indicating an incoming voice call from you. Scowling, Jimin nearly whines a what the fuck into the phone.

“I look like dogshit, dude, please,” you groan from your end.

“Seriously? You’re telling me you won’t show me your face because you look bad?” Rolling his eyes, Jimin reclines on his bed, a little assured at hearing your voice but also a little confused by your words. “Dude. I’ve seen you with puke all over your clothes, I’ve seen you with cum on your face, I’ve seen you with a black eye, I’ve seen you with—”

“Okay, I get it!” you interrupt with another groan. “I feel like dogshit, then. Is that better?”

Now he is concerned. “No. Obviously. How can that be better? Babe, what’s going on? You’re being…”

“Weird? Bitchy? Whiny? Annoying?”

“No, just…” He bites his bottom lip. “A little unlike yourself.”

“Wow, that's worse.” You give a small sigh. “I’ll be fine, I just need to recalibrate my head. Don't worry.” 

How can he not worry when you sound this tired and timid? Jimin almost wants to ask if Seokjin has something to do with it. But then his brain starts to conjure up images featuring exactly how that man could have tired you out and that leaves a bad taste in his mouth, followed by a series of negative emotions that make his heart race and his head hurt.

He went through this same series of emotions last evening, too, when you didn’t respond to his messages. He doesn’t want to give himself enough time to analyze any part of it, though, because he isn’t ready to face what he might uncover.

“How can I help?” he ends up asking, because putting his mind to literally anything else would be better than self-introspection right now.

You don’t respond immediately and everything is so quiet that Jimin can hear your breathing on the other side. Then you hum. “Honestly? Just give me a little time, Min. I’ll be fine.”

“Time? As in…time away from this conversation?”

“Yes, dork. Some time by myself, with my thoughts.” You chuckle as you say the words but Jimin doesn’t find them funny. 

He swallows the tight discomfort in the back of his throat and scoffs in response, though. “Well, okay then. Your funeral. And here I was thinking I will tell you about this weirdly snobbish butler-assistant guy the clients brought with them to the meeting last night.”

“Wait, butler-assistant?” You exclaim with a curious scoff, and Jimin smiles at the spark of the familiar humour that tinges your voice. “What the fuck is that?”

“Escapes me! They had this Alfred lookalike guy driving their limo, who joined in when they sat at the table with us, and—get this—dude kept interrupting me to tell his boss the time every fifteen minutes! What fucking clownery!” Jimin pauses to inhale, slightly disappointed when he hears you give a distant chuckle. You’re not invested. Your head’s somewhere else. He doesn’t want to share his story anymore. “I might sock him in the face if pulls that shit again, today.”

You give a hum in response, which sounds decidedly half-hearted. “I’m sure your intimidating scowls would’ve scared him away already, Min. He probably won’t join your meeting today.”

Jimin’s mouth slowly parts at the unfamiliarity of your remark. You never miss any opportunity to roast him about being a pacifist. How did you allow his claim of throwing a punch to go by so easily? 

And intimidating scowls? What happened to calling them ‘little bitch stare-downs’?

First you refuse to show him your face, sticking to this annoying voice call that’s overheating his phone because he doesn't have his airpods with him right now, and then you’re talking in a language that is so unlike you.

The discomfort in the back of his throat swells into a strange feeling that reaches the pit of his stomach.

“Yeah, I hope so… Sure.” His words come out low, hoarse and confused. So he clears his throat and puts a grin on his face. “Anyways! You sound like you need a fat nap to function like yourself again – I'll allow you to have that.”

“Mm-hm, I agree.” It could be his imagination, but you sound almost relieved. “I’ll call you soon, okay? Say hi to Tara for me.”

Jimin grunts and disconnects the call, immediately tossing his phone away as if it has personally offended him. Well maybe not the device, but the caller certainly has.

Just then, the door to the suite’s balcony opens and shuts, footsteps making their way to the other twin bed opposite the one he's lying on. He's almost counting down the seconds before a comment is made, and he doesn't have to wait long, when:

“Trouble in paradise?” comes Min Yoongi's taunting lilt.

Exhaling in ire, Jimin rolls his eyes. “For the last time: there’s no paradise to trouble, Yoongi.”

“You know what I mean, dude. You look worried. And frustrated. It's got to be about…her.”

Jimin winces at the emphasis on the pronoun. “She's not Voldemort, dude, you can say her name. What the fuck?”

“Ah, is that so? Then how about… the love of your life?” 

“Yoongi! Stop with that already, man. It's not like that between us, we’re just friends who lean on each other for support,” Jimin speaks on autopilot, having perfected the words he has been repeating ever since his colleagues got to know about your existence in his life. “It’s a strange dynamic but it works out well for—”

“Oh, shut up, King of Delusions. About time you stop fooling yourself and me with that bullcrap.” Now it's Yoongi's turn to scoff at Jimin. “Your feelings for her are becoming more and more obvious with time. And if I can see them with such clarity, I bet that you can as well. Which only means that you’re knowingly turning a blind eye. And it is pissing me off.”

So, yeah, this isn't the first time Jimin's hearing this lecture from his friend. 

It’s always the same story whenever any mention of you happens in Min Yoongi’s vicinity. Jimin should, ideally, be immune to the non-stop badgering, but the older guy somehow always manages to bring in fresh points to the table, so Jimin is forced to react with even louder groans, each time.

“When the hell are you going to admit you’re in love with her?”

“I’m literally not,” Jimin’s complaint comes out as a whine, and he mentally counts down the seconds till Yoongi will bring up the fact that he was stopped from pursuing you by Jimin. He wonders if the actual reason why Yoongi does this is because the guy still has a crush on you and feels resentful towards Jimin for not letting him ask you out. “Please stop.”

“You’re not in love? Sure, buddy. You forbade me from pursuing her like some alpha male protective of his mate… doesn't get more soulmate-y than that!” Yoongi rolls his eyes with a grimace. “When the fuck are you going to face yourself?”

“This again? Seriously? I've told you countless times that I did that because she was uncomfortable with your affections,” he reminds Yoongi for what feels like the hundredth time. “I was being a good friend.”

“Right, and she still doesn't know anything about it, does she? She still thinks I stopped pursuing her because I lost interest. Why haven't you told her you had a talk with me?”

Jimin closes his eyes and drags both his palms down his face because Yoongi is absolutely correct. “I… Because it doesn't concern her.”

Yoongi is silent for a while. When Jimin peeks past his fingers to see if the guy may have fallen asleep, he finds Yoongi gaping at him. “Are you even listening to yourself? You stopped me from pursuing her because she's uncomfortable, but telling her about it doesn't concern her? Make it make sense, Park!” He scoffs. “Does she even know we're friends? Does she know you're on this trip with me?”

Jimin remains silent, slowly turning his head to the other direction. “Not really. Told her I'm accompanied by Tara,” he mumbles, only for Yoongi to give a dramatic gasp.

“What? She doesn't know we're friends? Why the fuck would you lie to her about me? Are you ashamed of me, you asshole? And Tara, of all people? What the fuck is wrong with your head?”

Jimin almost laughs at Yoongi’s horrified expressions, but then stops himself because he half suspects the guy might toss him off the balcony if irritated enough, and they’re on the twentieth floor. “It's just… It never came up, I guess? I… don't really talk to her about work much…” His excuse is so weak it makes him physically cringe.

“You were literally just crying to her about our client's butler…”

“Okay, okay, fine!” Jimin sits up, sliding back to rest his head against the headboard, and looks up at the ceiling. “I don't know why I couldn't tell her. But it's not because I'm in love with her, okay? That doesn't even make sense because I still tease her about you for fun. And I also didn't stop you from pursuing her because I wanna be with her, or anything. I don't have those kinds of feelings for her. Promise.”

“Okay. What kind of feelings do you have for her then?”

Jimin opens his mouth to reiterate that you're just friends, briefly shutting his eyes in exasperation—and then freezes. 

An entire cinematic reel of images sets in motion behind his closed eyelids, all featuring your eyes, your skin, your warmth — and his intimacy with them. The darkened haze of your gaze when he pulled away from kissing you. The softness of the skin of your shoulder when he dug his teeth into it; the taste of your skin. Of you. He can nearly smell the scent of your hair in his lungs and can hear the short, hitched breaths you puffed out next to his ears. 

His heart rate kicks up and sweat dots his forehead within the seconds it takes for him to open his eyes again.

It is as if he got dunked into scalding hot water, stifling him and overwhelming all his senses all at once. He feels warm all over. His chest feels heavier than before.

Shit.

This isn't the kind of behavior someone’s ‘just friend’ would exhibit. These aren’t the kind of thoughts he has ever had about you, before.

Shit. 

“Well?” Yoongi is looking at him expectantly with zero judgement in his gaze. “What kind of feelings, Jimin?”

He and Yoongi share a sort of bond where they serve as each other’s sounding boards about decisions that they take at work, with their team. That is not to say that they aren’t good friends and only talk about work. But it’s just that these conversations have never really included much honesty from Jimin’s end whenever the topic hovered over you. 

Jimin can feel that he is about to change that now, though. 

He breathes in and honestly confesses to Yoongi what he hasn't even said to himself out loud, yet: “They’re… confusing.” 

Yoongi nearly jumps off his bed and lands on one corner of Jimin's, eyebrows raised and mouth agape. “Confusing? Not strictly platonic the way they used to be? Dude…” He shakes his head in awe. “This is new. What's changed?” 

Jimin fiddles with his thumbs, lips pursed together as he finds himself caught in a very uncharacteristic fit of nervousness. “So there's this… this thing that happened before I left for this trip… And it changed some things, I guess?”

Yoongi blinks at him, expressions dropped to a deadpan. “You slept with her, didn't you?”

“Wha—how the hell—”

“I’m older than you, I've seen more in this world than you have, so hush with the theatrics. Tell me what happened after that.”

Well. Where does he begin? “She… went on a date with a guy, so—”

“A date? Right after the day you had sex with her?”

Jimin clicks his tongue and shoves Yoongi's shoulder. “Yes and it's not a big deal, okay? We decided that we are going to move ahead and remain the kind of best friends we've always been. And she'd made plans for that date before we slept together, so it's all completely fine.”

Yoongi is squinting at him by the time Jimin stops speaking. “Hm. Is it, really? All completely fine?”

“Yes, it is! I just said it was!”

“O—kay? So what's the problem, then? You decided you both would move ahead and you did – what's the catch? You don't like that she's being normal?”

“No, that's not it. She… wasn't exactly normal, either. She sounded…” Jimin gulps the nerves that block his throat as the prospect of losing your friendship swims up in his vision. “She sounded off. Different. Distant.”

“Oh, boy… Are you scared that she hit it off really well with her date and moved away from you?”

Jimin rolls his eyes. “That's impossible.”

Yoongi gives a smirk which unnerves Jimin in all the bad ways. “Is it? Because if it isn't the possibility of her growing distant from you and closer to someone else that's been troubling you, your issues are way deeper and definitely scarier. Good luck, pal.”

Throughout the entire day full of meetings that Jimin goes through, Yoongi's words keep circling in his head. Did it really bother him that you went on a date? He swore up and down that you guys will remain normal and that night will remain just a memory. So obviously it was correct of you to go on that date you’d planned in advance! 

Why the hell is he acting up when you're doing exactly what you both planned you'd do? 

Jimin chooses to have lunch by himself, in one corner of the cafeteria, leaving Yoongi to mingle with the clients, and mulls over his situation and state of mind. 

Maybe he is bothered by your date. And maybe he is so bothered because it was too soon. 

Because he can't get the images of that night out of his head the way he thought he'd easily be able to. 

When he tried to nap on the flight, he saw you riding his dick. When he got into the shower, he saw your teary face after he'd eaten you out good. He had to touch himself to take the edge off, praying that Yoongi wouldn't hear him, and that literally helped with nothing.

Does he actually… want you? 

The last time this happened was around six years ago.

Jimin sips at his almond milk as memories of a time he’d thought was distant and forgotten cascade through his brain.

The two of you were juniors in college. He'd recently gotten out of this toxic relationship that had sucked all the joy out of his life and was spending his days sleeping in and skipping classes, and his nights drinking with friends. It was 2 am when he saw an Instagram post of you posing sweetly for the camera and all he could think of was how badly he missed you. How he hated the fact that you went to different colleges because he wanted to see you so bad. 

He'd left a series of drunk texts in your DMs, of all places, telling you that you were the best girl he'd ever met and that you were perfect in every way and how happy you would make someone by being theirs. You'd replied the next morning, thanking him for being a sweetheart and then told him that you’d found the lucky one – because axolotl had finally asked you out on a date. 

Jimin would never admit it to anyone, but he’d been really upset and extremely jealous of that stupid asshole. It had gotten to the point where he over-inserted himself into your relationship to let fucking axolotl know that he’d come first in your life. That is not to say that the dude wasn’t toxic enough by himself. But when Jimin saw the way his actions were causing you hurt too, he decided to retreat.

That was when he swore he would step back and be the best bff to you at every step in life.

And he’s been on that road pretty religiously!

All the flirting he gets up to with you is totally harmless and only for fun because he enjoys making you blush. Which is probably why he tried to categorize that night under this ‘harmless fun’, too. But it’s clearly not working. 

He’s restless. He needs to return home and see you in person.

He needs to ensure that he can still be your friend despite all these thoughts plaguing his brain.

What the hell is going to do if he doesn’t arrive upon the desired answer, however? He hasn’t the slightest clue.

Jimin spends the rest of the day waiting for your call – which never comes.

He texts you when he’s done packing his bags after his last meeting, but you don't respond.

The heavy feeling in his stomach grows heavier and heavier – until it becomes so suffocating that he has to come out to the balcony and breathe in some fresh air.

Except – smoke fills his lungs upon the first inhale, and he wrinkles his nose at Yoongi’s cigarette.

“What? Can't a guy enjoy a smoke in peace? We have to be at the airport in an hour.”

“Oh, no, don’t mind me. Please relish every bit of your death stick, by all means.”

Yoongi snorts at his words, and snuffs the remainder of the cigarette out with a roll of his eyes. “Your panties are in a twist again. What's happened now?”

“I'm fine.”

“Sure. And everything's okay between you and she who shall not be named?”

For a moment, Jimin nibbles on his bottom lip, watching the way the remnant smoke swirls away from the balcony and disappears into the late afternoon sky. Then he sighs. “I don’t know. She hasn’t responded to any of my texts and she didn’t call me. She’d said she would. I feel too fucking tense, it’s like my neurons are collapsing in on themselves.”

“Oh, man… If only you were a smoker, I would have procured you some of the best weed in the market. Would have taken the edge off with a handful of puffs.”

Jimin scowls at the guy. “Thank you for your consideration. Think I’ll just hit myself over the head with a saucepan and call it a day.”

“Stop stressing out so much, you moron. We’ll be back there in four hours. Take a cab straight to her place and talk everything out. Distance is a bitch that creates miscommunication. It’s just a matter of hours.”

Jimin nods to himself.

Just a matter of hours.

Just a matter of hours.

He can’t do it.

Jimin parted ways with Yoongi the moment he grabbed his luggage at the airport, and made a beeline for the cab he booked to take him to your place. He booked the ride in advance, even before he shot you a text informing his arrival back in town.

But just as his butt touches the leather seats – he realises that he can’t ambush you at your place.

So he regretfully gives the driver his own address and agrees to pay the extra amount that this re-routing would cost.

He shuts his eyes and lets out a deep, guttural exhale of frustration. Just a few hours ago, he couldn't wait to get to you fast enough.

And now, when he is at such a short distance away from actually being able to approach you and have a face to face conversation, his nerves have shackled him down and he cannot get himself to do it.

Some part of him believes that he needs to have a proper talk with himself about what the hell has happened with the dynamics the two of you share before he can prepare himself to have one with you. But some part of him believes that to be just a cop out. Which isn’t a complete lie, because at the end of the day, he is deathly afraid of losing you.

He needs to destress his mind.

But you’re the person he turns to when he needs to destress his mind.

Maybe… he can call you? That won’t be as risky and potentially devastating as paying you a visit, right?

Right. It can’t be. And he’s gotta talk to you because he misses you like crazy.

When his cab finally slows down before his apartment, his anxiety has reached a high that is making his forehead sweat despite the car's AC. Hopping out of the vehicle, he pays the driver and quickly gets into his apartment.

“It’s all gonna be fine, Park,” he mumbles to himself in a lame attempt at a pep talk while he changes out of his clothes and hops into the bathroom for a quick but hot shower. “She's your best friend in the world. You won't lose her. To anything.” He thickly swallows. “Or anyone.”

Donning some sweatpants and a t-shirt, he walks into his living room with his hair still wet and opens up a window to let some fresh air in. The sun has just sunk beneath the horizon, leaving behind some remnant daylight and a beautiful orange hue. Inhaling the crisp evening October air, he pulls his phone out of his pocket.

07:42 PM | Text Message from Grumpkin 🎃💖 woohooo! welcome back to the town, dork <3

He smiles at the text and calls your number.

You pick up the call within seconds of its ringing, filling his phone screen with your entire form that is seated in your bedroom’s bay window.

Jimin’s words sort of get stuck in his throat at the sight of your gorgeous self dressed down in grey lounge pants and a pastel yellow hoodie. 

Wait, gorgeous? You look exactly the way you have always looked. 

And… you have always looked gorgeous, haven’t you?

Jimin can feel his palms beginning to sweat. No, Yoongi was wrong. He wasn’t ready to face you. He isn’t ready to confront all that has changed in his perception of you, when you are exactly the same person that you have always been. 

Your hair is wet, as if you just exited the shower too. And the way your hoodie drowns your entire body seems like the most adorable thing in the world to him. Your cheeks have a darker tint to them, too – caused by warm water, excitement about talking to him, or something else entirely? He hasn’t a clue. It just makes you look prettier and his heart beat louder.

Jimin is suddenly overcome with the urge to run all the way to your place and envelop you in a hug.

And you both never hug—both certifiably allergic to physical affection.

Fuck, he wishes he was there so that he could cup your pretty face in his palms and cover your kissable lips with his own. His fingers twitch with the urge. 

Fuck. 

Fuck.

“Welcome back, dork!” you announce, spreading your lips in a joyous grin. “Are you sleeping with your eyes open wide?”

Broken out of his crisis-inducing trance, Jimin forces a chuckle out of his throat, “I—I was gonna sing-song ‘honey, I'm home’ to you, but you picked up the call t—too fast.”

Fuck, did he just fucking stutter? You don’t seem to have noticed, thankfully, because you simply laugh some more. Your eyes are big and bright and brimming with affection, even if you've pursed your lips in a faux display of anger.

He feels like he missed looking into their depths. Has it really been just two days since he last saw you?

Wait, not even fully that – he left your place yesterday morning.

And now he’s on a freaking video call with you, clutching onto his phone like it’s his lifeline, nearly panting for your attention and affection as if he’s been starved for it. 

Shit, shit, shit, he is supremely screwed.

“Honey’s glad you’re home, too, I guess?”

Your response is ten-on-ten on-brand with the sort of banter the two of you engage in. It makes him believe that everything is actually good. That it’s all gonna be alright. 

Jimin smiles and hopes to God he doesn’t look as stupidly lovesick as he feels in the moment. A lost puppy finally returning home to its owner. 

Cursing under his breath at his train of thoughts, he reclines sideways on one of his sofa chairs and fluffs his wet hair away from his forehead. 

“So, how was your trip? How’s Tara?”

“Trip was good. Productive. We sealed the deal – despite the stupid Alfred-ass guy. And Tara’s fine, too.” He tries his best to disguise his wince as a smile. “Rushed home the moment we touched down.”

“Oh, her husband must’ve picked her up, right? Forgot she's married.” You nod to yourself, scratching your head and furrowing your brows in thought. “How was your flight?”

“It was fine. Had to sit next to a guy who fell asleep the moment we took off, and constantly kept leaning his head on my shoulder. It’s just a three hour flight! He couldn’t stay up that long?” he grumbles, rolling his eyes because the guy he’s talking about is actually Min freaking Yoongi. “I think I have a cramp in my right side because of him.”

You chuckle at that, popping some salted almonds into your mouth. “So what’s the plan for the week? You got office tomorrow?”

“Yep! Although we both are allowed to go in a bit late.”

“That’s considerate of your company.”

There’s a dull pause in the conversation which Jimin uses to wordlessly admire your face on his phone screen, again. He remembers the way other guys used to compliment your eyes, or the length of your nose, the plumpness of your lips, and how he used to just roll his eyes at their words because he didn’t see what they saw.

Well, now he does. He sees all of that and so much more. He sees it and he craves it. 

If not kiss you then at least see you. Be in your proximity. Admire your smile without a camera distorting it into pixels.

He wishes to visit you. He feels ready enough. Composed enough. He will keep himself safely off of risky topics. 

Like, come on. He is twenty-seven. Mature enough to handle himself enough to not make a fool of himself or accidentally ruin a friendship that he holds dearer than his life. Of course he is.

“So, what about you? Any plans for the night? Should I come crash?”

It’s out before he can overthink—or even fully think—of a proper, saner, more sophisticated way to pose the question.

And given the way your eyes widen slightly, regret singes his tongue that articulated the words. “Uh…”

Catching himself in time, Jimin sits up and makes a show of narrowing his eyes at the screen. “What? What is it? What are you hiding, little wench?”

A laughter bubbles out of you, but he can sense your awkwardness through the expressions you wear. It guts him. Swallowing thickly, he raises his eyebrows and beckons you to speak.

Finally, you exhale and purse your lips. “Well, um. I, uh, kinda have Seokjin coming over later?”

The way Jimin’s jaw drops to the floor hasn’t a smidgeon of acting to it. “Say what?”

You wince, biting down on your bottom lip. “Yeah…”

“I… Didn’t you say you didn’t wanna talk about the date?” His voice comes out hollow and plain, absolutely unlike what it usually is.

“I did, yeah, but I also said I needed to figure it out. And we’re, um, just figuring things out. I’ll tell you when—”

You cut off with a jump as your doorbell goes off in the background.

Seokjin is there. Seokjin is at your place. To be with you. To hold you, kiss you, touch you — and probably more.

Jimin feels the floor disappear from beneath his feet. His stomach is lurching and he is free falling. 

“I'll, uh, I'll be right there!” you call in the general direction of the door, casting a hesitant glance towards your phone.

Jimin's free-fall increases in velocity.

“Is that… him?” he asks in a scratchy whisper, face nothing short of horror-struck.

And when you give an almost shy nod, Jimin's brain short-circuits and he can't see a thing.

“Well, okay then! Have a great time! See ya later!”

He disconnects the call and allows his phone to drop down into the carpet beneath the chair he’s seated on. 

Despite trying his hardest, Jimin can’t stop his mind from making up images of you and Seokjin entwined in bed, with you making all the sounds that Jimin elicited out of you not forty-eight hours ago.

Fuck.

He feels shaken up. 

Getting up, he walks into his kitchen and grabs a bottle of water.

“It’s fine,” he tells himself. “It’s just weird because it’s too soon. Otherwise it’s good. It’ll be great. She needs this. I told her to go for it.” 

He clears his throat and sips some more water.

“They’re just sleeping together, anyway. She isn’t going to fall in love with him overnight. And if she does, she’ll tell me… And I’ll support her because she’s my be–best friend in the world.”

Even as the words leave him, they scorch his insides on their way out. His brain feels fuzzy with all the misplaced anger, regret and loss he feels. 

It’s half past two in the morning and Jimin is scrolling brainrot content on social media to put his mind off of the activities you might be getting up to. If you'd be in your bedroom or if you'd be in the living room, in front of the TV. 

If Seokjin would be eating you out in the same spot where Jimin—

Okay, here's a video of fifteen rubber duckies! They're being squashed at the same time! They're making such a horrendous but hilarious sound!

Needless to say – he isn’t doing a great job keeping himself distracted.

Groaning at himself, he refreshes his feed and gets ready to scroll again. And then he comes to a halt.

A post from you has popped up. 

It's a selfie featuring you and Kim Seokjin, seated in your car, heads tipped together in the middle of the seats, grins on your faces and cones of vanilla ice-cream in your hands. A passably normal and arguably cute picture.

Until Jimin’s eyes travel to the content below the picture.

He sits up in his bed upon spying the ‘💝’ emoji you’ve captioned the post with.

A heart emoji? You abhor those! Last time you willingly put one on your social media was way back when you were still with axolotl!

Oh…

Oh no…

Does this mean that you and Seokjin…?

And when the fuck were you planning to tell him?

Jimin needs to talk to you. Soon.

Foregoing any texts announcing his arrival, Jimin decides to steer his car towards your place, right after work on Monday. He gets off an hour later than you, so there’s no chance he won’t catch you.

But as he locks the vehicle and makes his way up your apartment, it hits him that there is a very real possibility that he might find Seokjin in there with you. And Jimin is completely unprepared to confront the man without having a conversation with you first.

So he presses the bell with his fingers crossed – and gives a sigh of relief when you open the door by yourself.

You’ve changed out of your work clothes and are dressed up in the same set of hoodie and lounge pants he saw you in during the video call, yesterday. And his urge to capture you in a hug and then smother you in kisses is back.

Stifling it all, however, Jimin focuses on the social media post he saw and allows the feeling of irritation and betrayal he felt upon spotting the heart emoji to wash over him, again. 

Then he grins at you. “Surprise?”

Your gaping mouth closes on a chuckle and, rolling your eyes, you let him in. “Unannounced but not unpleasant, hey.”

Jimin resolutely looks away from the couch in your living room, unwilling to let his resolve to confront you weaken by any means, and heads straight to your kitchen table to occupy one of the bar stools.

“So. How’s work?” He asks, leaning over the counter a little, and squints at your form as you busy yourself pouring a glass of orange juice for him.

“Uh, what? Work’s work. Did you come here to ask me that?” Your head tilts to the side in a question and Jimin exhales in defeat.

“No. Obviously. I'm here to ask you about Seokjin.” You tense at that and Jimin gives a scoff. “Okay, don't you dare try to whip up a story! You didn't tell me on Saturday – fine. You barely told me anything yesterday, harsh but acceptable. But now I'm here and now I wanna know what's going on. And if you dare try to look for a way out this time, I will drive a knife through your gut.”

He didn't mean to go that dark, but your behaviour has gotten on his nerves so awfully, that he couldn't help it.

“Wha–Jimin! I told you I'm still figuring it out…” You avoid his eyes as you speak, playing with the drawstrings on your hoodie. “I'll tell you first thing when I have clarity.”

“Well, I think you do have clarity but you’re just refusing to share it with me. And you need to hurry the fuck up with that because I'm losing patience here.”

Your forehead furrows. “Hey… You can't rush me to make up my mind about someone! It's bad enough that you pushed me to go on a date with him.”

“But I'm literally not rushing you? I saw that social media post you made, and you captioned it with a…heart emoji. You never make public gestures of affection with someone so quickly, so I just wondered if you had developed actual feelings for the guy, beyond the admiration you claimed to have for him. I was concerned about you. What choices you'd made.” He looks away from your face and down at his manicured nails. “As your best friend.”

Your sharp inhale draws his attention back to your face, and he is met with a somewhat cautious expression. “Oh? So you're being a concerned friend? That's – that's the only reason why you'd like to know about me and Seokjin?”

Jimin's breath gets caught in his throat. What did you just ask him? What did you imply?

He frantically searches your face to look for cues that would guide him towards the right way to respond to your question, but all he can find is impatience and thinly veiled disappointment.

The amount of confusion he feels makes his head spin.

He can either be honest – or he can play this safe. And given the amount of risks he has taken with you recently, he would very much rather stay in the comfort zone for once, even if it means that he has to lie.

“Sure. I mean…what other reason could there be? Right?”

Your shoulders slump in defeat and your eyes lose a bit of their sparkle. Before Jimin can even begin to analyse what the hell any of it could be about, you're straightening up again with a determined set to your shoulders.

“Yeah. That's right. No other reason. None at all. You're a concerned friend, that's good. That's great.” You lick your lips and then walk around the counter to sit on the other stool, next to him. Your eyes are hesitant when they meet his own. “Because Jimin, I've been wanting to tell you something. I've thought about this throughout the weekend, and… I really, truly regret that night. What we did was stupid, careless and extremely catastrophic. We shouldn't have slept together.”

Jimin feels a part of his soul crumble and wither at those words.

His brain slows down, gaze grows heavy, and his lungs have to put in extra effort to keep his breathing steady. 

Stupid, careless and extremely catastrophic.

His fingers tremble when he tries to reach for the glass of juice, so he pulls them towards his palm and forms a fist to hide them from you.

“You… why?” He hates himself for sounding as small and lost as he does. Clicking his tongue, he runs both his palms down his face and looks up to meet your saddened eyes again. “I mean it's great that you moved on the way we'd planned, but you don't have to regret the night we shared. It's okay. You can have it both ways.”

You shake your head, eyes even more sadder than before. “But I don't want to. We are supposed to be friends forever, Jimin. You and I… We can’t - I… I can’t lose you. To anything. So I can't do what you’re doing. Cherish that night's memory and behave normally. I need to forget and I need you to know that I wish it never happened. And that I'm… I'm sorry that I’m not strong enough.”

Jimin tries to swallow past his dry throat, only to cough when he can't. 

It kinda sounds like you're afraid you might want him still, so you are nipping the possibility in the bud by denying that the two of you ever crossed the line. It kinda sounds like you can’t move ahead because of that night, so you wish to act as if it didn’t happen.

But you are lighter on words and heavier on nibbling your lip, so maybe you've somehow figured out how precious that memory is to Jimin and you’re just trying to spare his feelings, which – ouch. 

He knew he was becoming pathetic but he didn't realise it was this pathetic.

Scoffing, Jimin gets up and shakes his head. “Don't worry, I wasn't getting any ideas about us doing a repeat of what happened, if that's what you were concerned about. I only want the two of us to resume being the best of buds and share everything the way we used to.”

“No, Jimin, that's not—I mean, you wanted me to give Seokjin a real shot and I did. And so I don’t want there to be anything that holds me back from being honest about it.”

The set of words hurt him more than they should, but he moves past them to address his main concern that you still seem to have missed. “Hey, listen to me. I didn't come here to hound you about Seokjin because I have a problem with what's going on. I came here because I have a problem with you not telling me what's going on. I have a problem with you believing you need to keep it from me for some stupid, untrue reason that you might’ve made up in your head.”

You don't say anything for a while, don't even look up to meet his gaze. Your lower lip stays between your teeth and your eyes don't look away from the kitchen counter where both your hands rest next to the untouched glass of orange juice.

And then you suddenly look up and into his eyes, determination all over your face. “You need to get a girlfriend.”

Uh.

What?

Gaping at the offputting, crooked smile that overtakes your face, Jimin slowly shakes his head as he wonders if he might've heard you wrong.

“Yeah,” you continue, nodding to yourself, “I feel guilty, Min. I’ve broken our no-dating pact, so it's only fair if you get to leave, too.”

Woah. Two dates with a guy and you've already declared your pact broken? And yet you wouldn't say a word about Seokjin beyond the fact that you’re pursuing it because Jimin asked you to.

He is quite literally too stunned to speak.

You laugh a little, looking almost nervous. “What? Don't tell me you fell in love with me or something, Min. That night was purely physical, right? We're mature enough to remember that.” 

The words hit him in a bad way, because you very clearly said them in a way that was meant to hurt him. Of course it was purely physical! But nothing between the two of you can ever be without at least some semblance of emotion because you both go way back! Even the playful insults you toss at each other and the jokes you share carry affection, intimacy and meaning. 

He doesn't have the slightest clue what you've been trying to do all this time, but if you truly want to rile him up and upset him tonight, he's going to forfeit and give you the satisfaction of having succeeded. He hasn't got enough mental strength to decipher the meaning of everything you're doing and then try to diffuse the grenade you've built.

So Jimin steps away from the counter and gives a loud scoff. “Don't be ridiculous. Of course not, there's no way in hell. How could I ever be in love with someone like you? Look at your emotional range and look at mine. I know, better than anyone else in the world, that you’re incapable of love. I know not to love a rock. I'm not stupid.”

Your face falls and eyes turn glossy, but Jimin can bet you aren't hurting like he is. You can't. That's one of your superpowers – compartmentalising so well, you sometimes don't even see the hurt that devastates others. 

“R–right. Didn't have to insult me, but you're right.”

“Why?” Jimin scoffs. “Isn't that what our relationship is about? Being friends? Laughing together? Insulting each other?”

You frown at him. “Why're you talking like that? Why are you getting angry at me?”

Jimin blinks at your words, watching the way your eyes look truly clueless, and sheer sadness envelopes him. 

Because it hits him now. Maybe you didn’t say those words to hurt him. Maybe he underestimated your inability to feel. Maybe you really don't get why it was special. Because you really didn't feel why it could be special.

Maybe nothing between the two of you has ever carried any emotion to it, for you.

You have no idea about the emotional turmoil he's been in the past two days when he couldn't get you out of your mind, because you were on a completely different page. This is why it was easy for you to go on that date and then call that guy home the next day.

The night you shared with Jimin doesn't matter to you. Jimin doesn't matter to you.

Not the way he thought. Not the way you do to him.

And his evolving feelings for you, whatever they end up becoming, would only serve to be an inconvenience in your life that you would just ask him to sort out instead of helping him wade through them because… 

This is who you are. 

This is who you've always been.

This is the girl he met in eighth standard, had a crush on, became lifelong friends with, had sex with, and developed more than platonic feelings for.

This is you.

He doesn’t know how to deal with this realization. He can’t deal with this sitting in your kitchen. And he can’t deal with this without a drink.

So he collects his coat and walks out of your house, ignoring your calls of his name and choosing his own sanity over you for once

© jimilter | 2025

[vijaxx]

tell me that i'm pretty, tell me that i'm yours.

summary: on a late night in la, you and billie have a talk.

warnings: fluff (?), suggestive, smoking, deep talks

"you shouldn't do that, you know".

billie jumped in surprise at your voice coming from behind her as she smoked on the balcony. she shrugged absentmindedly and lit another cigarette. "how many is this?" you asked, walking up to lean on the railing next to her.

the lights of la gleamed in the midnight blue sky, a slight chill through the air. "fourth," she replied, "but it's not a big deal". you never liked when she smoked, but there was an aura around her as she did it, never making eye contact with you as she brought the lit cigarette to her lips.

the smoke danced around her, and you could tell that this was to calm her nerves. "you know i don't like when you smoke," you slouched against the railing, looking at her pretty eyes that were focused on the scenery. "i know you do." she murmurred, running a hand through her hair.

the silence wasn't uncomfortable, but things needed to be said. "i've never smoked," you admitted, laughing dryly. she then made eye contact with you for the first time. "you haven't?" billie asked, "you seem like a stoner." you tilted your head to the side, "i'm not against marijuana. just cigarettes and vapes. that shit kills you."

billie nodded in understanding. "i could show you how." your eyes widened. there was nothing to lose. it was a peaceful night in la, you were on a balcony with your pretty best friend, and about to have the most homoerotic experience with her if you agreed. so you nodded. going against every moral you had, you caved as her pretty lips curled into a smile.

"atta girl," she responded, her ever present smirk on her face. "part your lips," she murmured cupping your jaw and squeezing your cheeks, encouraging your mouth to open. she placed the cigarette against your lips carefully, tugging on your bottom lip before letting it snap back into place.

"breathe." she commanded. you took a sharp breath at her words, inhaling quickly and coughing. "slow down, sweet girl." your mind went blurry as she called you petnames and the quick inhalation of nicotine hit.

"try it again." she placed it against your lips, as you breathed calmly, inhaling the smoke. "there we go. that's my good girl." you felt your cheeks heat as she toyed with you.

by the time you were completely high (and so was she), she started kissing your neck. "god you're such a fucking pretty girl," she groaned against your neck, biting at the sensitive skin.

as you let out woozy whimpers, she rested her hand on your thigh, liting another cigarette for herself. "do you want one?" she asked, tender eyes meeting yours.

you'd do anything to make this moment last, "yeah. yes please." she chuckled at your politeness, "baby has manners, no?". you flushed and reached for her lighter as she handed you a cigarette, but she moved it away.

instead, she leaned towards you and lit yours with hers. "that's it. nice and slow, baby." she cooed as you took more daring breaths.

it wasn't until the next morning that the high had worn off, and that you were in her bed, naked.

you had a lot to talk about.

a/n: hiiii so i wrote this cause i could <3

👾 : @47lake , @hkkuugu , @st0nerlesb0 , @n0vabug , @everythingtruly, @eeuni

[mirrorball-leclerc]

karma - part eleven

series masterlist

mark webber you people weren't being serious about the marriage thing were you?

oscar piastri-leclerc why? jealous? mark webber you are spending way too much time with aurora aurora button excuse me? he was this way when we found him oscar piastri-leclerc FOUND ME?! I'M NOT A STRAY DOG AURORA! aurora button i don't know where they found you

natalia leclerc wedding preparations are going great mark, thanks for asking

kimi raïkkönen who's getting married?

max verstappen fernando and santiago kimi raïkkönen oh, i didn't know they were in love. oh congrats 🌈 logan sargeant-leclerc i don't know if i should laugh...

liam lawson wait, so that wasn't a joke?

yuki tsunoda-leclerc no liam, that wasn't a joke

oscar piastri-leclerc WHEN DID YUKI BECOME A LECLERC?! natalia leclerc we adopted him last week. he brings me delicious food. logan sargeant-leclerc damn, he stole your mum and your grid mum

fernando alonso i would look radiant in a dress would i not?

santiago ruiz the second best bride out there amor fernando alonso WHO THE FUCK IS THE FIRST? santiago ruiz i'm sorry my love, but my daughter fernando alonso well you're not wrong natalia leclerc i'm crying

ben santos-ruiz can't wait until mom is calling dad about this.

mark webber yes, where is your wife in all of this? santiago ruiz fuck if i know and it's ex-wife, we're divorced

daniel ricciardo wedding of the century. do i get to be best man?

jenson button fuck off we all know that's going to me

ollie bearman-leclerc do i get to be flower boy?

pato o'ward-leclerc you're ring BEARer ollie bearman-leclerc that was a horrible pun aurora button i thought it was great ollie bearman-leclerc oh my god, you're so right, it's the best pun ever jenson button what the fuck is this? liam lawson isn't it obvious?

aurora button i'm flower girl right, with kimi?

jenson button since when are you friends with kimi antonelli? aurora button even since our super top secret mission against ferrari logan sargeant-leclerc oh my god what the fuck did you do? ollie bearman-leclerc the less you know the better. aurora button the less likely you are to end up being sued over what we did

lewis hamilton what the fuck did i miss?

mark webber finally someone with some common sense around here. tell them they're being stupid. lewis hamilton well that depends, what are they planning on doing? santiago ruiz fernando and i are getting married to mess with the sainz family lewis hamilton can i be best man? santiago ruiz if you agree this isn't a stupid idea and it's one of our best yet, then yes, you can be my best man. lewis hamilton deal, this isn't a stupid idea. mark webber WHAT THE FUCK?

ben santos-ruiz all of you are lacking several brain cells

george russell why did i just get a wedding invite via email to a wedding between natalia's dad and fernando?

lando norris i got one too

alex albon so did i, can someone please explain to me what the fuck is happening right now?

pierre gasly charles, what the fuck are you guys doing?

charles leclerc why do you think i'm planning something? they're in love calmar, let them get married max verstappen yeah pierre, let them be happy together. i didn’t take you for a homophobe pierre. pierre gasly do not start that shit back up again verstappen, the rumors just stopped.

esteban ocon i wasn't aware fernando also liked men

lance stroll just look at the tension he's had with jenson and mark

lando norris have those two always been here?

daniel ricciardo i'm also here, for the record

logan sargeant-leclerc does he not know that this is the unofficial grid group chat?

oscar piastri-leclerc mate, i don't think he's realized it.

george russell WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON WITH NATALIA'S DAD AND FERNANDO?

lewis hamilton fernando and santiago are getting married to piss off the sainz family. liam lawson which i thought that they were joking about but turns out they're being very much serious about it.

yuki tsunoda-leclerc i think it's a fantastic idea!

oscar piastri-leclerc stop coming for my title of favorite child yuki! logan sargeant-leclerc we all know leo is favorite followed by ollie. yuki tsunoda-leclerc i stole your mum and now i'm stealing your grid mum charles leclerc i feel like i should do something about this but i'm helping my wife plan a wedding

lance stroll DO I GET TO BE A GROOMSMEN??

max verstappen ask nando lance stroll HE SAID YES!

daniel ricciardo seb just texted me saying he's officiating the wedding.

lando norris you people are going too far for the bit

max verstappen don't you dare tell carlos or i'll take you out next race

lando norris my lips are sealed.

oscar piastri-leclerc don't worry, i'll have aurora threaten him

logan sargeant-leclerc just heard lando's girly scream

pierre gasly you people are afraid of a pipsqueak?

alex albon say what you will but aurora is a small ball of fury much like yuki logan sargeant-leclerc she's terrifying mate yuki tsunoda-leclerc i like her, she gets me

natalia_leclerc, francesca.cgomes, and aurorabutton added new stories

aurora has not let go of leo since we got here, now he wants my ice cream...how do i tell him no? everything is so tiny and adorable 🥺 i will never again agree to go out with both kika and nat, this is the third 'errand' we've ran today because of our super top secret mission.

liam lawson genuine question, what gender are baby leclercs going to be?

natalia ruiz there's a bet going on that it's going to be girls but i'm like 83% certain that it's going to be a girl and a boy. yuki tsunoda-leclerc who are we to argue with momma leclerc? natalia ruiz yuki, you might just be my favorite person today

max verstappen damn yuki really is coming for that favorite child title

natalia ruiz i don't have a favorite child but if i did it would be whoever brought me more stroopwafels right now

ollie bearman I'M ON MY WAY! oscar piastri-leclerc OLLIE STOP IT! I'M ON MY WAY!

pato o'ward-leclerc if you see me in max's apartment, no you didn't.

max verstappen HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET INTO MY APARTMENT? pato o'ward-leclerc penelope let me in, after kelly said it was okay

aurora button jokes on you guys, i broke into lando's apartment, it's much closer

jenson button SINCE WHEN ARE YOU A LECLERC? aurora button my plan is to marry into the family. i still don't know how i'm going to achieve that. maybe i'll marry ollie or logan

logan sargeant-leclerc no thanks, you can marry ollie.

logan sargeant-leclerc he just let out an unholy screech

fernando alonso oh i get it now mark webber there was something to get from that?

lewis hamilton when's the wedding?

natalia ruiz this sunday, clear your schedules

ben santos-ruiz at what point have we gone too far for the bit?

santiago ruiz not yet

sebastian vettel just got ordained, this is going to be great!!

mark webber this is going to be a disaster

alex albon WHY MUST I BE FORSAKEN?! WHY MUST I SUFFER?! WHY DO I HAVE TO BE THEIR NEXT VICTIM?! WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE?

max verstappen what the fuck is wrong with him

aurora button have you seen the announcement? on the f1 twitter page?

max verstappen twitter doesn't exist anymore aurora it's x now

aurora button i refuse to call it fucking x

logan sargeant-leclerc all my homies hate the sainz family

charles leclerc why does this group even exist?

aurora button because we all hate the sainz family, duh?

natalia leclerc you okay logan?

logan sargeant-leclerc it's not like james it a secret that he was looking for my replacement

alex albon LOGAN! ARE YOU OKAY?!

logan sargeant-leclerc i could be better but it helps that i'm staying with osc

alex albon MAX, YOUR ASS BETTER RETIRE! I WANT THAT RED BULL SEAT! I'LL BE SECOND DRIVER AGAIN!

charles leclerc i'll take alex as a teammate

ollie bearman-leclerc damn, guess i'll die or something. charles leclerc in the sense that you still need time to mature at haas before you drive at red bull aurora button sure, just say you hate him or something. charles leclerc this is why you tripped this morning

mick schumacher spending an awful lot of time with the leclercs aren't you aurora?

aurora button shut the fuck up, focus on alex's mental breakdown

alex albon IT'S JUST UNFAIR! THERE'S NO FUCKIGN WAY THIS IS HAPPENING TO ME!

alex albon why do bad things happen to good people? i've never done anything wrong

natalia leclerc that's a lie, you dared me to jump off the roof into the pool and i broke my leg alex albon and somehow it's my fault that you didn't stick the landing?

max verstappen 🫵🤣

oscar piastri-leclerc at least he won't me terrorize us and will be at the back of the grid

pato o'ward-leclerc rip ollie bearman, he's going to get killed by carlos sainz ollie bearman-leclerc WHAT THE FUCK WHY? logan sargeant-leclerc you're a leclerc lovechild. man am i happy to be gone for once

ollie bearman-leclerc i hope everyone's pillow is warm on both sides

aurora button damn what he say fuck me for ollie bearman-leclerc except for you of course

max verstappen back to our regularly scheduled clownery i see

aurora button fuck you ollie bearman-leclerc fuck you

alex albon I'M SUFFERING! DOES ANYONE KNOW ANY MERCENARIES?? OR PAID ASSASSINS?

mick schumacher alex, mate, let it go, you're fucked alex albon I'LL LITERALLY KILL MYSELF BEFORE I HAVE TO DRIVE ALONGSIDE THAT MAN AS MY TEAMMATE! HE'S GOING TO KILL ME!!

natalia leclerc this family is a fucking nightmare...

alex albon YOU'RE LITERALLY PLANNING A WEDDING BETWEEN FERNANDO AND YOUR DAD TO PISS OFF THE SAINZ FAMILY!! charles leclerc IT'S A GENIUS PLAN ALEXANDER!! alex albon I'VE BEEN CURSED AND YOU'RE FUCKING LAUGHING? max verstappen pretty much, yeah

alex albon fuck you guys, i'll go complain to george or lily instead.

natalia leclerc remind me to pay lily and george for dealing with you instead of us alex albon FUCK OFF!

liked by natalia_leclerc, fernandoalo_oficial, olliebearman and others

marvelgossip well marvel nerds, we've got some new hot gossip this week, starring none other than the lovely santiago ruiz who will be playing reed richards aka mr. fantastic, in the new fantastic four adaptation. while arriving on the set of marvel’s fantastic four, mr. ruiz, was seen wearing a ring on his ring finger that wasn't there before. could this be a plot detail or is mr. ruiz perhaps married to someone unknown? 

tagged: santiagoruiz

view all comments

user1 JOEL MILLER I SWEAR TO THOR IF YOU SECRETLY GOT MARRIED-

user2 this is probably just another plot point guys because if santiago ruiz, one of the hottest names in hollywood got married, we'd for sure know about it.

user3 you people call yourselves marvel nerds but you don't know that canonically reed richards is married to sue storm, of course he's wearing a fucking ring user4 i only watched the movies with jessica alba and chris evans and even i know this shit

user5 guys it's cool, he's married to me, no need to worry about it

user6 boring, old news, santiago got married like a week ago

user7 HE'S MARRIED? TO FUCKING WHO?? user6 he's married to fernando alonso?? a 2x spanish formula 1 world champion, i fear this is old news user7 OLD NEWS TO FUCKING WHO? THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'M HEARING ABOUT IT??

fernandoalo_oficial oh when will my husband return from war

user8 this man has 7.3 million instagram followers and he's thirsting over santiago ruiz on a marvel gossip page fernandoalo_oficial have you seen him?

estebanocon wedding of the century folks, wedding of the century

olliebearman wedding was in spain, i ended up in portugal with kimi and aurora

oscarpiastri i'm convinced you three would've ended up in the harbor had the wedding been in monaco aurorabutton you don't know shit, this was a decision we made while sober

user9 i've never been so confused in my life and i take ap chemistry

marvelgossip there's never been this many verified pages on my account, holy shit

natalia_leclerc that's papa right there

marvelgossip natalia, is your father married to fernando alonso? natalia_leclerc yes, my dad did in fact marry fernando alonso charles_leclerc it was the highlight of my year and i won monaco and found out my wife is pregnant

jensonbutton guess i just lost my husband

user10 are you talking about fernando or santiago? jensonbutton yes

user11 millions of fangirls around the world just let out the ugliest scream of pain

user12 forget the fangirls the f1 drivers, who are known to love santiago ruiz just let out the ugliest screams ever alex_albon they get me, i waited years to marry santiago ruiz and white man did it in 3 weeks landonorris truly mourning the loss of single santiago ruiz and i guess fernando too but mostly for santiago

liked by pierregasly, sukiwaterhouse, santiagoruiz and others

natalia_leclerc helped put together a top secret wedding in two weeks with a some help, what did you guys do? 

tagged: santiagoruiz, fernandoalo_oficial, charles_leclerc, francesca.cgomes, aurorabutton

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mrsamclaflin thanks for the invite, it was very fun!

natalia_leclerc thank you for stopping by on such short notice sam mrsamclaflin of course, call me for any other super top secret wedding and i'll be there.

user13 wait, so this wasn't a joke?

liamlawson30 that's what i thought the entire time fernandoalo_oficial you were there when i proposed, much to my displeasure user14 these two beefing even off track will never not be funny to me

yukitsunoda0511 abuelo looking great in that picture!

user15 when the hell did yuki become a leclerc? yukitsunoda0511 when i became the only one mom knew who could cook a good meal oscarpiastri i can cook too yuki logansargeant mate, i hate to tell you this, but no, you can't

lewishamilton i couldn't tell this wedding was pulled together in a few weeks

francesca.cgomes that's such a huge compliment coming from you pierregasly i complimented you guys too? aurorabutton but is your name sir lewis hamilton? do you have 7 world titles? do you sing the words, "i like to play the doctor, operation?" user16 that song will haunt lewis for the rest of his life

olliebearman shoutout to my super great ring bear skills

aurorabutton ring bearER kimi.antonelli that joke wasn't funny the first 300 times olliebearman the flower girl who tripped doesn't get to speak kimi.antonelli GABRIEL TRIPPED ME? gabrielbortoleto_ i should've been flower girl not you or aurora aurorabutton stay pressed fernando's 2nd favorite child gabrielbortoleto WHO THE HELL IS THE FIRST? aurorabutton me bitch

user17 summer break so crazy a marvel actor and an f1 driver just got married

user18 don't forget the f1 announcement user19 thoughts and prayers to alex albon, he's going to need them ♥︎ liked by charles_leclerc, natalia_leclerc, aurorabutton and others

aurorabutton i think we outdid ourselves with this one

francesca.cgomes it almost makes up for the stress we caused you? aurorabutton not a fuckign chance, you two owe me big time natalia_leclerc but i'm pregnant? aurorabutton once you're no longer pregnant then

fernandoalo_oficial is this, my hija?

natalia_leclerc papa?? bensantos_ruiz i refuse to call this man dad santiagoruiz that's not very nice benjamin fernandoalo_oficial aurora said to put, "who's your daddy now bitch?"

user20 i hope santiago knows that by marrying fernando he just became a stepfather to all of fernando's grid children.

sukiwaterhouse santiago made a jaw-dropping groom and i guess fernando's there too ♥︎ liked by landonorris, georgerussell63, liamlawson and others

user21 not all the drivers in the likes of that comment

user22 i can't be the only one confused on the fernando alonso and santiago ruiz dating timeline, right?

user23 when the hell did they start dating is my first question? user24 how long have they been together is my second question? user25 so many questions and so little answers

jenson button WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU TWO IDIOTS?!

jenson button AURORA KATHERINE BUTTON WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?

jenson button AND SOMEONE ADD KIMI!

natalia leclerc added kimi antonelli

kimi antonelli i didn't do it!

jenson button WHERE ARE THEY?!

kimi antonelli hiding at lewis' apartment aurora button SNITCHES END UP IN DITCHES KIMI!

ollie bearman-leclerc your middle name is katherine?

max verstappen that's information you should know about your wife before you marry her ollie bearman-leclerc YOU'RE NOT HELPING VERSTAPPEN!

logan sargeant-leclerc well she did say she was going to become a leclerc one way or another

liam lawson wow, one leclerc got married in vegas and the other got married drunk in portugal yuki tsunoda-leclerc don't forget one got married for the bit

lewis hamilton don't leave blood all over my apartment jenson

ollie bearman-leclerc IS THAT HIM POUNDING ON THE DOOR?!

aurora button IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! WE WERE DRUNK!

ollie bearman-leclerc I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE! LEWIS DON'T LET HIM IN!

natalia leclerc what the hell is going on?

kimi antonelli ollie and aurora accidentally got married in portugal and now jenson's going to most likely kill ollie. oscar piastri-leclerc does this mean i get to be the favorite child now?

daniel ricciardo what the hell did i fucking miss?

liam lawson so fucking much dude

yuki tsunoda-leclerc jenson's probably killing ollie as we speak

lewis hamilton the fuckers barricaded themselves in my room with roscoe

ollie bearman-leclerc I HAVE SO MUCH LIVE FOR! I JUST GOT AN F1 SEAT! I GOT MARRIED?!

jenson button YOU'RE NOT FUCKIGN HELPING BEARMAN! I'M GOING TO FILET YOU!

aurora button man, where the hell is mick to talk some sense into me when i fucking need it?

kimi raïkkönen jenson, don't you dare touch a hair on his head or i will have one of my drivers run you over

max verstappen and think about it like this, they may be married but they still haven't consummated the marriage

ollie bearman-leclerc IT'S LIKE YOU FUCKING WANT ME DEAD OR SOMETHING? jenson button WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN BEARMAN?!

aurora button he's pounding on the door and roscoe's barking again

ollie bearman-leclerc WE DIDN'T CONSUMMATE THE MARRIAGE! WE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WE WERE MARRIED UNTIL KIMI SENT US A PICTURE OF THE DOCUMENT!

ben santos-ruiz this isn't the middle ages. we don't need to consummate a marriage

aurora button now my dad is arguing with lewis on the pros and cons of pissing off kimi by killing my husband

jenson button STOP CALLING HIM THAT! aurora button legally he is my husband? jenson button legally i can kill both of you aurora button legally mom would kill you for killing me and her son-in-law who she hasn't even met

charles leclerc jenson, please don't kill my son

ollie bearman-leclerc THAT'S IT? THAT'S ALL YOU'RE GOING TO SAY? natalia leclerc he's painting the nursery, he's very busy ollie

ollie bearman-leclerc SOMEONE ELSE IS POUNDING ON THE DOOR!!

ollie bearman-leclerc oh it's seb, thank god oscar piastri-leclerc this is better than any show i could ever watch sebastian vettel ollie, please come out now, jenson is restrained. we need to talk about this.

liam lawson man don't take away my favorite reality show

aurora button i'll let you know how it goes liam

pato o'ward-leclerc what in the everliving fuck did i fucking miss?

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¡leclerc-s speaks! 𝜗𝜚 yeah, i have no excuses for this. i was sleep deprived when i started writing this and just continued it after. and yes, the faceclaim for natalia’s father is pedro pascal, but that’s because i love him. 𝜗𝜚 anyway, happy new year!! note: this will transfer over in the mastermind fic but it will be more in depth.

¡disclaimer! 𝜗𝜚 this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[iwashie]

Sevika Headcanons

She almost never touches you with her mechanical arm, she always holds you with her human arm or takes off the prosthesis. When you tow walk down the street, she leaves her mechanical arm on the opposite side of your body.

Doesn't care about age, height or weight

She loves you all, all your body, but she has a weak spot for your ass. It's the way it jingles when she slaps it or the way it sways when you walk...

She's a dom top, but when the day was rough, she maybe will let you take control, always holding and guiding your head

Calls you "girl, doll, my girl," or "woman" and loves when you call her "vika, baby," will go crazy when you tease her and calls her "mommy"

Trusts you and lets you wander around the bar and go out with friends, but always keep an eye in case some stupid man tries something

"Wear whatever you want, doll. I know how to fight"

Always has you sitting on her lap during night games at the bar, her human arm caressing your thighs, and loves seeing you dancing

Always kisses you holding your neck and waist, devouring your moans and leaving your breathless

Always go down on you, and she eats you out like she's been starving all day, shoving her face in your pussy and gulping your juice, always makes you cum a first time on her tongue or fingers

SHE ALWAYS KISSES YOU AFTER EATING YOU OUT

Likes cowgirl, reverse cowgirl or doggy, and always chokes you during it, points if you cry in pleasure

Is the bigger spoon, and also likes to crush on top of you.

She lets you tangle your limbs on hers when sleeping and always has she human hand around or waist or holding some parts of your body

Likes when you visit her on the office and let's you sleep on the couch

She, somehow, is always attracted to energetic people, so she'll always let a sigh out but will smile seeing you all energetic

She secretly likes to see you, Jinx and Isha acting like a family, the golden retriever trio tiring she out

She feels so warm and happy seeing you taking care of Isha and Jinx, imagining forming a family with you

Didn't correct Jinx when she said that you four were a family, duh

She learned how to handle her mechanical arm and other stuff but loves when you help her or ask how to do something to help her

Her mechanical arm always hurts her, so she loves it when you give a massage that turns out in a make-out session on her lap

You don't need to know how to fight, she'll do it for you, but loves to see you defending yourself

Always make sure you're okay, have enough sleep or food, but always forget about herself so fucking loves when you bring her food o let's her take a nap cuddling you

Don't tell you about her day, not to worry you, so always ask about your day. Always glares at Jinx when she tells the truth

Always responds to your requests, so Jix and Isha are always having breakfast and dinner with you two

Jinx cut her hair and kinda messed up, but you assured her that she's fine, hot as hell, the piercing idea was yours...

When she has leave firts she always kisses you goodbye and always gives in when you say "more 5 minutes, baby..."

She's definitely proposing to you, but is regretting asking Jinx for help...

@iwashie 2025 please do not translate, modify or republish my works

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

2024 BL Wrap Up

Welcome to my 2024 bl Wrap Up!

A quick look at my stats this year, so that we can get it over with: I watched 60 BLs, most of which are from 2024. 24 of them came from Thailand, 15 from Japan, 14 from South Korea, six from Taiwan and one from China. I created 209 gifsets and had to deal with several heartbreaks.

Somehow 2024 was an intense year for BLs, at least for me. Even though I watched significantly less than in 2023 and skipped many series to save them for later, many of the series I watched touched me, both positively and negatively.

But what did the year actually look like for me? What are my thoughts today, looking back on 2024?

China, Japan and South Korea fought it out to see who could bring the saddest characters to life and write the saddest stories. On the one hand, we have China's re-entry into the BL world with Blue Canvas Of Youthful Days.

A series whose characters have suffered so much, healed together, supported each other, only to end up with a double noble idiocy and and a time skip so they see each other again in the last two minutes of the series and we get a half-hearted happy ending. I would have loved this series much more without this giving up your own happiness in hopes the other one is happy. Just talk to each other and find a solution together. Please.

Secondly, there is Our Youth from Japan.

Both characters suffer at the hands of their parents. One with domestic violence, prejudices and hatred and the other with absent parents, disinterest in his own personality, prejudices and separating parents. In both cases, they are neglected and find the support and trust in each other that they miss in the world. They feel misunderstood and learn about their own desires and needs through their affection for each other. The series is not yet finished, but it is one of the bluest series this year.

But Japan is not entering the race with just one series. Happy To The End is also a contender for a top spot at the Hurt-Mountain.

The story of two maltreated souls who somehow manage to find a little love and trust in a life full of darkness and pain. The series had left me with strong feelings and a dear friend gifted me the Mangas for Christmas. I can't wait to dive into their story again! And don't forget our super-villain of the year! This series had it all!

South Korea entered the race with Let Free The Curse Of Taekwondo.

I don't know who suffered more in the end, us as viewers who watched the suffering of both protagonists without being able to give them a warming hug and to tell them everything is going to be fine or the protagonists themselves and their attempts to hold up their own walls and tear down the other one’s. Those two have come a long way to at least talk to each other again. Such a good storytelling!

Meanwhile, Thailand thought it would be nice to start a little competition to see which of their series could be the fluffiest of them all. ThamePo is not included in this calculation, because I'm too biased when it comes to this series. They could present me green slime dancing in the rain while Po is staring at it lovingly, and I would celebrate it.

At first, I thought Every You, Every Me was going to easily win the race, but suddenly, they bring in death and the series is elevated to a weird, way too complex and under-explained meta-level where actors are trying to end their relationship because reasons?

I would have liked to have seen more of the multiverses in which our soulmates fall in love with each other again and again. The first four episodes were so good and so different than our usual bls. I couldn't stop loving it. But I guess the trophy will go to Your Sky after all in this case.

God, I'm blushing and giggling to myself with every episode. Fah and Rak are just so cute together. The series is pure fluff so far and even though I don't know what to expect from the remaining episodes, I know that the two of them will surely be happy together in the end.

The award for best performance goes by far to War Wanarat from Jack & Joker.

His diversity and ability to immerse himself in the different personas and play them believably was great cinema this year. The series might have some plot-holes or characters who could have had more screen time together, but the series was interesting and Joke was the best!

And while we're on the subject of Jack & Joker and Your Sky, let's move on to the trophy for this year's best kiss. The crown would have gone to Jack & Joker, but then Your Sky came around the corner with this great first kiss and wow. I was in a bit of a quandary until I remembered that this is my recap. So I'll just make two categories.

The best and softest first kiss this year goes to Your Sky.

The best and hungriest first kiss this year goes to Jack & Joker.

Kidnap didn't necessarily have an exciting and well thought-out plot, but Ohm's Puppy Eyes were unbeatable.

And yet ThamePo clearly won the staring contest with only three episode aired. I mean, hello? Who wouldn't fall head over heels in love with one of them when they look at you like that?

And contrary to all assumptions, neither Kidnap nor ThamePo has the biggest baby girl of the year! No, this is what Taiwan brought to the screen with The On1y One and let's not kid ourselves, Tian loved making everything possible for his Wang and taking care of him.

And who would have thought that the most romantic scene of the year came just close before the year ends? ThamePo! What have you done you beautiful, beautiful series! And how could the remembering of a phone number be the most romantic shit of the year? And yet here I am loving everything about this scene and the series. Oh the wait was so worth it!

While in most cases it was clear that the couples would get together at the end of the series and our little BL bubble would remain intact, Japan made it a little harder for us to predict a happy ending. 25 Ji, Akasaka de probably thought it was funny to play with our emotions like that. My Strawberry Film was probably lying in the corner, laughing at the fact that we believed its misdirections about being a bl. And in Hidamari ga Kikoeru, they remembered at the end that it is a bl and that the audience has been waiting for a long time to see the protagonists together in a scene again and conjured up an unspectacular happy ending with one of the most uncomfortable looking hugs in bl history.

Taiwan, on the other hand, didn't care whether their series had a happy ending or not and simply cut one of the best series of the year with strong acting and a great story in the middle without knowing whether there would be a second season.

And so The On1y One hangs somewhere in cliffhanger limbo and we viewers are desperate enough to search the internet for bad English translations of the story to at least find a little bit of closure. It's worth reading the bad translation though.

And while the world around me was already falling apart, Taiwan and South Korea were fighting over who could tear my heart into smaller pieces by the end of the series. While I was obsessed with Unknown and even bought the final episodes as early excess,

Love For Love's Sake managed to crush my heart into the finest powder. Never before have I been so heartbroken as after this series. I didn't know what to do with myself and my emotions for days. It was terrifying and yet so beautiful. One of the strongest heartbreaks I've ever felt. Clearly the best series this year for me.

Quietly and secretly, Thailand then surprised us with a pretty good adaptation of the much-loved Japanese classic Cherry Magic. And Tay and New surprised me with the fact that they can actually kiss each other without looking like they're in pain. The chemistry was on point and their love scene at the end... wow!

I also discovered a new format for myself in 2024. While I've always stayed away from watching shows on my phone because it's just too small, I came across Match Play on social media and just knew I had to watch it.

And that's how I slipped into the universe of vertical mini-series. My ADHD brain is happy about the short, entertaining nature of the episodes. And yet I was so hooked by the series that it's now my most rewatched show. And that's despite the fact that I don't really like doing that, i.e. repeating series. But I can watch it whenever, whereever.

I was able to watch with my best friend how two people fell in love with each other and are still together and happy.

The Boyfriend was an experience that I would never want to miss, not only do my friend and I now regularly watch shows together, but the show briefly gave me back my faith in love, not for me, but in general.

I finally found another show this year where I really liked OffGun.

The Trainee was a great show with good humor, great characters, honest problems, and an Off that I actually liked in his role. I don't often get that with him.

I had to learn once again that South Korea is not yet ready to introduce a queer couple in one of their big productions. The hints were there and so was the chemistry!

But unfortunately there was no happy ending for my poor heart and Sergeant Kim in Sweet Home 3. But he did make it onto my phone as a wallpaper. That's something too, isn't it?

But South Korea also surprised and sent a terrific adaptation of the novel Love In The Big City to the screen with a cast to be proud of and a story that was worthy of being filmed so well. The biggest plot twist for me came when it was revealed that No YeongSu was a toxic and utterly homophobic asshole. God, I loved the two of them together and would have loved to see No YeongSu come to terms with his own sexuality, but the show has just been too realistic for that. But their scenes together? Chef's kiss! The best lift of the year!

But not everything that tried to shine this year was gold.

On the dark side, Japan and Thailand both tried to piss me off this year by letting series that started so well and would have definitely been my favorites, had they kept it up, hit the wall in the middle or near the end. Seriously Thailand, what was that about Last Twilight? And Japan, I hear the sunspot was so good until you decided to put in a character that was so unlikable that many of us just got angry and until you decided that our protagonists just couldn't have any positive character development and just stopped communicating with each other. And that had been their strength all along!

Wandee Goodday wanted to be this cool show, with sex positivity and sex buddies, but quickly became a romantic sludge that was as predictable as every other GmmTV story. I'm not saying that's always a bad thing, just a little unnecessarily schmaltzy and sweet at times.

South Korea gave us a brief scare once when it thought it wanted to produce a series together with Thailand. I don't know, but I just can't take Mew seriously since then. Love Is Like A Cat was bad. The acting was really bad, the plot didn't know what it was supposed to do on set any more and it simply left midway through the series, never to be seen again.

Unfortunately, this didn't improve the acting and so it was more a case of just not giving up. Sometimes I also wonder what's wrong with me that I keep watching those series and why I'm doing this to myself (yes, I'm looking at you Dinosaur Love).

What 2024 really had a few of, however, were stories with a very unique plot. There's Love For Love's Sake, where someone gets a second chance through a computer game. Or Century Of Love, in which a centenarian in a young body waits for the love of his life and is surprised when they are reborn as a man.

Or Caged Again. I'll wait until I can binge it myself, but the story of a penguin and a panther who fall in love as humans sounds great! Or 4 Minutes, in which time was so confusing that I lost track at one point. Or who could forget our first Omegaverse series Pit Babe?

Which was somehow a little lacking in Omegas and made people questioning everything after finding out that Pavel wouldn’t be on top. Or Playboyy, a series that I think is underrated and which style is so artistically pleasing. Yes, the story was messy af, but the manner in which this series was shot and filmed was exquisite. And Love In The Big City and The Nipple Talk, two very good, very adult series that I wish could get more attention.

All in all, 2024 was a great year with interesting stories and fascinating characters that I will certainly be returning to from time to time.

And with you, my dear friends and followers, creators and viewers. Your presence in 2024 has sweetened my year and made my feed happy! Thank you to all of you out there!

May 2025 treat you well and delight us all with great new stories!

[thezombieprostitute]

Tech Tuesday: Ransom Drysdale

A/N: Written for @the-slumberparty's December Daze Challenge.

Prompt: can i put my cold hands up your sweater for warmth?

Word Count: ~1.3k

Warnings: Alcohol consumption. Please let me know if I missed any!

Previous

The bar isn't as crowded as you'd feared. Usually you spend New Year's Eve in the comfort of your own home where no one can judge you for going to sleep at a decent time. But Ransom had insisted that going to a random bar full of strangers was his New Year's Eve tradition. You probably would have fought him a bit harder but you were still recovering from Christmas.

Ransom knew you were trying to reach out to your family again. That you'd hoped to make progress with them over Christmas. When you came back to the office the day after he saw through your fake smile. He's not pushing for details, part of being a good friend, right? But he can at least hang around so there's someone you can talk to if needed. He'd hoped that going to a bar and picking out potential kissers would be a good distraction for you.

At least until you confessed you'd never had a New Year's Eve kiss before.

"I've told you my parents were...fundamentalists," you griped. "There are some aspects of it that I'm not sure I'll ever be able to shake. Like kissing some random guy being a bad idea."

"Well, what if you get to know the guy first?" Ransom thinks. "Just don't lead with 'never had a New Year's Kiss'. That'll just bring out the weirdos."

That makes you half smile. "Yeah, definitely wouldn't want my first kiss to be with a stranger."

Ransom's brow furrows in confusion, "you mean first New Year's Eve kiss, right?"

"That too," you casually confess before taking a long sip of your Pretty In Pink cocktail.

Ransom gives you a look you can't decipher before saying, "maybe this was a mistake."

"No! It's a new year, it can be a new experience, another aspect of the old me that I let go."

"Only if you're certain now, before you've had too much to drink."

"Aren't you supposed to get drunk first? Liquid courage and all that?"

Ransom hesitates. It wasn't that long ago he'd be the first to encourage you to kiss whatever creep came along, just to spite your parents. Encourage you to be more like him, playing life like a game without consequences. But he's not that guy anymore. Right? At the very least, you're too good a person to be mimicking his behaviors.

He lets out an exasperated sigh, "no. You're telling me now, while you're sober and thinking relatively straight, if you really want to do this. Before you take another sip of that drink."

You give Ransom your best pout and you see him bristling. "I just wanna have some fun, Ran," you pout.

"Maybe this was a mistake," he shakes his head.

"No! You participated in my Friendsgiving tradition, I want to participate in one of your traditions! You said this is something you do every year and I want to participate!"

"We can spend the evening here, but we're gonna both forgo the kissing part," Ransom concedes. "We'll just get drunk and raise a toast at midnight, okay?"

You pout for real this time. "Why is it such a big deal? It's just a first kiss. Aren't women today supposed to be empowered to kiss whoever they want?"

Ransom considers his words. "You're right that you don't need permission to kiss anyone you want. I just...Something I've been trying to work on is reducing my family-induced cynicism. I know from experience that if you treat kisses like they're nothing, they can lose their meaning. I...I want better for you. Better for my friend."

Knowing how difficult it is for Ransom to talk about these things you stop pouting. "Okay," you nod. "Just a toast to bring in the new year."

"Thank you," he sighs, looking a bit more relaxed.

"How about we start the evening with a toast?" you offer, raising your glass. "A toast to friendship and new beginnings?"

Ransom raises his beer bottle, "and to not letting our past dictate our future."

You clink your drinks together and take a sip.

A couple hours and several drinks later you're feeling a little woozy. Ransom offers to go get the refills but you're adamant that it's your turn to do so. He's a bit tipsy himself, you've never seen him smile so much, and he agrees to let you go.

You give your order to the bartender and hold onto the bar to steady yourself when you feel a presence to your left. A tall man in a blue suit leans on the bar next to you. He's pretty handsome, even with the stubble. It actually works with his short hair. He turns to you and you struggle not to gasp at how pretty blue his eyes are.

"Oh, sorry if I'm crowding you," he smiles.

"No, not at all," you giggle.

"You here with your boyfriend?" he asks, gesturing to Ransom.

"Friend," you tell him.

His smile widens, "I'm Nick."

You give him your name as heat rushes to your face. This handsome man is talking with you!

"Got any plans for midnight? It's coming up in just an hour or so," Nick asks.

"A toast!" you say a little too loudly.

He gives you a mock frown, "no kiss?"

"No kisses! Just a toast. Ransom's idea."

"Ransom your friend?"

"Yup! And he's great! Once you get to know him."

"Yeah? Would you be up for introducing me? Letting me get to know him?"

"Sure! He could use more friends and you seem the friendly type!"

"That I am," he smirks.

The bartender brings you your drinks and you pay for them before making your way back to Ransom. Nick is very helpful at keeping you steady on your feet.

Back at the table you beam at Ransom, "I made a new friend! His name is Nick."

Nick holds out his hand to Ransom and says, "nice to meet you Hugh."

Ransom's smile is gone and whatever buzz he'd been feeling is greatly diminished. He grabs your hand, "we're going. Now."

"What? Why?" you pout. But Ransom gives you a look that pierces your drunken haze enough that you're grabbing your coat to go with him.

Ransom's jaw is clenched and he's practically dragging you out of the bar. Risking a glance back at Nick you see him smiling smugly, making you feel even more confused.

Once outside Ransom takes a breath of the cold air to steady himself. The plan was to walk back to your place since it was so close to the bar but now he's not sure. What if that asshole follows and makes things worse for you?

"C'mon," he tells you, taking your arm. "We're going to catch a cab back to my place."

"I don't like your place," you drunkenly confess. "It's so bare."

"Well then I'll make sure to get some interior decorating advice from you while we're there tonight, okay?"

You giggle at the thought but then you shiver, "Ransom, it's cold out here and I don't have my gloves."

"We're going to get a cab soon enough," he promises as he walks down the sidewalk, pulling you along with him.

"What's gotten into you? Oh, why did Nick call you Hugh? Is that what set you off?"

"Sort of," he grunts, looking everywhere for a cab. He doesn't want to use a Lyft or Uber in case this Nick character decides to share in on it.

"My hands are cold," you whine. "Can i put my cold hands up your sweater for warmth?"

"When we get into the cab, sure."

You giggle, "I'm gonna hold you to that."

Ransom's barely gotten you into the back of the cab before you shove your hands underneath his sweater, making him yipe.

"Mmm, so warm. You gently squeeze his belly and snuggle close. "Even better than a plushie," you murmur as you start to fall asleep.

Ransom half carries you into his apartment and you give a little squeal when you see the Sweater Pusheen you'd gotten him sitting in a chair.

"You kept it?"

"Of course I did," Ransom admits. "Makes for good company."

You start to tear up, "I thought you hated it because I never saw it after I gave it to you."

"It's a nice gift and I like to have it around. Kept me from getting too lonely at Christmas."

You wrap your arms around Ransom with such force he falls back onto the couch. He tries to unclasp your arms from around him but you're holding tight so he waits for a few moments, letting you get the hug out of your system. Normally you ask permission but he's not going to begrudge you being a happy drunk.

He chuckles and rolls his eyes when he hears your soft snoring and resigns himself to a night on the couch. He looks at you softly and kisses the top of your head. There are worse ways to bring in the new year, he figures.

Next

Tech Tuesdays Masterlist

Tagging: @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @ellethespaceunicorn; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory;

@late-to-the-party-81; @lokislady82; @ozwriterchick; @ronearoundblindly; @lokislady82

@thiquefunlover63

[writingastory]

Request: Zayne - Behind Closed Hearts

Request: Hello! Can you please write a story or scenario with Zayne and reader? When they are in relationship and they get into an argument because Zayne keeps overworking himself and they barely have time to see each other. Zayne tells reader to not worry about it, but eventually lashes out on her with his cold tone. He ends up being called back to work and leaves reader. Reader then leaves Zayne apartment and goes back to her own apartment leaving a note that they need a break. Zayne obviously feels bad and tries to contact her/reader, but she’s still upset and wants her space. Zayne understands and misses her terribly, but she avoids him and ofc misses him. Then a few weeks pass by and Zayne is trying to see reader, but then he sees her with Sylus who is her friend that obviously likes her. Prompting Zayne to win her back plus some intimate moments/ professing his love for her. This has been on my mind for a while and if it’s too much for you I understand. Sorry that it’s so long. TY!✨💗

Pairings: Zayne x fem!reader; Sylus x fem!reader (platonic)

Warnings: Angst, arguing, eventual fluff

Genre: "Normal" AU (no Evol, no Wanderers - just normal life)

Words: 2.3k

A/N: Thank you for your request. Even though I specifically stated "headcanons" for requests... this was an idea that I just couldn't ignore. Hope you enjoy this! 💕

"Zayne?"

"Zayne!"

She frowned at the lack of response. Was he still on the phone? He had a bad habit of taking calls after hours. What started as a rare exception, slowly turned into a regular occurrence, with his damned phone constantly interrupting their togetherness.

Her fist slammed the table angrily, the plates and glasses rattling and clinking in a loud chorus. She got up from her chair and stomped to his office, pushing the door open without warning.

There he was, sitting at his desk, his phone glued to his ear still. Zayne frowned at her in irritation - almost angrily so. "Keep it down," he mouthed, turning with his chair, humming at something the caller said.

"You said this would be quick," she said quietly, hoping he would at least spare her a glance - or reassure her in any way. "Zayne," she pleaded once more, all feelings of consideration for him and his demanding job long gone. "This is ou-," she was cut off by him standing up suddenly and making his way over to her.

"Out," he whispered, pushing her out of his office gently but firmly and closing the door. Hot tears made their way over her burning cheeks, seething anger bubbling up in her.

"But-," she sobbed quietly, the words stuck in the lump forming in her throat.

The dinner was long forgotten when he finally came out of his office, already fixing his tie. "I need to go back to the hospital," he said in his usual stoic tone. "I apologize that tonight didn't quite go as planned."

She sat at the dining table again, looking at the cold and empty plates. "Of course," she whispered, "work always comes first, after all."

"Please stop," he answered, walking over to her slowly. "You know that I love you - but you also knew from the very beginning, that my job is very demanding. I can't just tell people to not have heart problems at certain times."

"You're not the only surgeon in Linkon, Zayne." Her tone was sharp as she got up and walked around the table - away from him. She could not stand being near him anymore. "Can't you see what this workaholic lifestyle is doing to you? To us? Damn it, the nurses spend more time with you than I do these days."

Zayne frowned again. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, fixing the sleeves of his crisp white shirt, "but it doesn't change the fact that they need me there right now."

"I need you here, Zayne," she cried, not even bothering to hide the tears anymore. He avoided her gaze as he gathered his things. There was a moment of silence before he spoke up quietly.

"Please don't make me choose."

She looked at him in shock. His words stung - worse than any pain she ever felt in life. It was a dark, crushing pain, blooming in her chest and spreading all throughout her body. Why would he feel the need to choose in the first place...?

Shaking her head lightly, she turned away from him, hiding the fresh tears streaming down her face. She heard him sigh behind her, before he quietly made his way to the hallway. Just as he was about to leave, she called out to him.

"Don't go.... please, don't go."

Zayne halted in his tracks for a moment, his hand resting on the door handle. "I'm sorry," he whispered, and stepped outside, the door falling shut behind him quietly.

A few moments passed, before she broke down in sobs, tears of hurt and anger blurring her vision. "Happy anniversary to you, too," she yelled at the door - as if he could still hear her. The storm inside her was raging, months of pent up frustration, cancelled dates, and broken promises bursting out of her. The downpour was heavy and violent - as was the sudden silence that followed.

She sat on the floor in the living room, her back resting against the couch. Her tears had dried, her sobs died down, and she was left with a certain clarity of mind. She couldn't do this anymore.

Yes, she loved Zayne - but she could not take always being second choice anymore. This was not the kind of relationship she wanted in life, not even with a man as amazing as Zayne.

She scrambled to her feet slowly, starting to collect her things that had accumulated over the many times she was at his place. Every single piece felt wrong to take away, like she was committing a crime of some sort.

Every strange noise made her perk up, a spark of hope erupting in her. Was he coming back? Did he... choose her after all?

But with every noise that ignited a small glimmer of hope, came a crashing wave of ice cold reality, when she had to realize that he was not returning that night. Not soon after he left - or even five hours later.

So it came that she found herself in his office, sitting at his desk. The surface was relatively empty, save for a notebook, a pen... and a picture of the two of them. She remembered that day vividly. They had visited the annual fair together and enjoyed a day of fun, laughter, and sweets. And then, finally, after months of orbiting around each other... they shared a kiss, sweet and gentle.

Now, the same memory that had brought her joy and excitement, caused a deep pit in her stomach. She sighed deeply and placed the framed picture down again, as the memories slowly faded away. Swallowing the lump forming in her throat, she grabbed the pen and a blank paper sheet from one of the drawers. She hesitated for a moment, the tip of the pen hovering above the crisp white paper. Then, eventually, she formed her words of goodbye.

The sun was already rising above the horizon when Zayne was finally coming home. He was exhausted, mentally and physically. He called out her name as he stepped inside. Usually, she was already awake by this time of the day.

He said her name again, slowly making his way through his apartment. Something felt off. It was quiet. Too quiet. He frowned when he saw the food and clean dinnerware still on the table.

Once more, her name left his lips as he entered the bedroom and found it empty, the bed untouched. A terrible feeling crept up his spine, and following a certain hunch, he opened the top drawer of his dresser slowly. He shut his eyes in pain and remorse when he found it empty. Her clothes were gone, as was her perfume on top of the dresser. Zayne closed the drawer with a soft thud, his hands dropping to his sides.

He took out his phone and dialed her number, only for his call to be immediately sent to voicemail. "Please..." he whispered, walking through his apartment aimlessly, noticing the spots that had her things in it, that now sat empty, "please, pick up."

In the midst of the chaos that was her absence, Zayne found the one thing she left behind. A letter, neatly placed by the picture on his desk. The words burned in his eyes, like a fire against the white of the paper.

Zayne, I'm not asking you to choose between your work and me. What would be the point, since you already did?

He sat in silence, trying to process the words he was reading over and over again.

She was gone.

His love had left him.

Somehow, his world seemed a little less bright ever since that night. It became dull. Lifeless. Monotonic.

Incomplete.

He splashed his face with cold water, willing away the painful memory. Many times he had tried calling and visiting her, wanting to work things out - but she would not let him.

"We need a break, Zayne," was all she had said to him before shutting him out again. It hurt, but he could not blame her when he was the reason for this situation.

Weeks passed. Weeks full of regret and anger, hurt and doubt. Was he doing the right thing by giving her space, when all he wanted was for them to be together again? Could he even make it right anymore? He recalled all the times he had stood her up, making her wait for him. She deserved better.

But he did not want to let her go. He wanted to be better for her. He wanted to be the man she deserved. All his awards, his passion for his work dulled in comparison to her love and companionship. He realized that then - and hoped it was not too late for that.

As the weeks went by, she slowly got used to the heavy weight resting on her shoulders. She hated this feeling. More than anything, she wished to meet up with Zayne, hug him, kiss him, make everything go back the way it was between them - but she knew that she needed space to see clearly, to figure things out.

She sighed deeply, when her phone was ringing once again.

"I told you to stop calling me," she mumbled after picking up.

"No, you didn't," the man on the other side chuckled deeply. "Sylus," she said, a small smile forming on her lips. "I thought you were on a business trip?"

"I was," he answered, "but I could wrap things up earlier than expected. Are you in the mood for some coffee?"

She wanted to say 'no'. Then again, Sylus and her had been friends since elementary school, and maybe this would take her mind off things, help her get some distance from the emotional mess she was dealing with.

"I'll pick you up," he said. She could hear him smiling through the phone. "Alright," she answered, ending the call with a soft tap on the phone screen.

Zayne was stressed when he finally got off work. He was annoyed, he had a headache, and his eyes were burning. He groaned in frustration and rubbed his temples. He needed a break. A good coffee and maybe something sweet would certainly help him - or so he thought. Finding his love in the same café he went to, was not part of the plan. And seeing her with another man did not make it any better.

Rationally, he knew that those two were life-long friends. Emotionally, he saw red.

Without ordering anything, Zayne turned around and left the café. He knew where he had to go. This madness would end tonight.

It was already dark outside when she got home, confused when she found the door to her apartment not fully locked.

"Don't be frightened," Zayne's soft voice called from the darkness of her living room, "it's me."

"What are you doing here?!" she demanded, letting her keys fall into the dish with a loud rattle. "I think I was very clear in my demand for a break."

"You were," he agreed, turning on the light with a soft click. He sat on the couch, his legs folded, his eyes fixed on her form. "Yet, I find it nearly impossible to continue like this."

Silence filled the room. She took off her shoes and walked over, sitting down in the arm chair across from him. She tried her hardest to remain calm and stoic, even when her heart screamed at her to lunge at him. She craved his touch, his presence in her life.

"You look tired," she noted after terribly long moments of silence. "I'm not sleeping well lately," he answered quietly, a soft sigh following his words.

"I'm sorry," he said, his haze finding hers once more. She shuffled in her seat slightly, biting her lip. Countless thoughts flooded her mind, threatening to spill out - but she wanted to listen to what he had to say first. So, she looked at him in silence, waiting for him to continue.

"You were right. I did make a choice... and I despise myself for it. I despise myself for not seeing your hurt, for not understanding how you must have felt."

She swallowed thickly at his words. It was hard for him to talk about feelings. This was a lot - for both of them.

"The past weeks have been hard. I miss you. I miss us."

A single tear rolled down her cheek at his words. "I miss you, too," she said quietly. "But I'm scared. What if we end up right here again? That's not the kind of relationship I want..."

"My love," he breathed, standing up and walking over to her in a few long strides. He kneeled down in front of her and took her hands in his gently. "I don't want that either. I know my mistakes, and I don't want to repeat them. I will be better for you. Can you... find it in yourself to forgive me? To give me another chance?"

She did not even make an effort to hide her tears, letting them run freely over her skin. In a fraction of a second, she leaned forward, pressing her lips to his - a silent answer.

Foreheads touching, they both sighed quietly, the pent up tension finally leaving their bodies and the air around them. "Let's never.... do that again," he whispered, his arms slowly circling around her, as he hid his face in her lap. He squeezed her gently, scared that she could somehow disappear from his grasp again.

"Agreed," she mumbled, raking her fingers through his soft hair gently. "I hate fighting anyway."

He smiled and looked up at her. "Oh, one more thing. Don't believe I forgot," he said, reaching into his pocket, pulling out a small, neatly wrapped present.

"Happy belated anniversary."

[d011zk1ll]

Soooo... New years appreciation post time!!

Honestly, Tumblr is one of the few places where I can just. THINK. And I'll find like-minded people. Like .. where are you all irl??? At the beginning of this year I had, what? 50 followers. And now I have 300 something. Please don't ACTUALLY follow me, especially home! From ASMP, to SBG, I've found brilliant, creative people on this app. I've made some amazing friends, and some moots that I sit and marvel at on a daily basis. How I got here, I'm not sure. But I know some people have seen the entire progression, like @easybakeovenn (I'm praying that's Koda's easybakeoven account, if not!! I'm sorry random person/gen!!)

There will be special mentions under the cut, obviously!!

@what-is-going-on-im-confused ah... Good old Meels. I still sit and stare at the art you've made of Mao and Scarabella daily, I don't think you know how much I SCREAMMMEDDD at Koda when you showed me it. It's, well, incredible. YOU'RE incredible. You're funny, and one of my best mates. Though we still need to restart that stardew farm at some point... This time with the chickens... Thank you for helping me with alyanette august, and I'm really happy you did, because else you'd have hidden away in a corner somewhere, and we wouldn't nearly be as close as we are now

@rot-decay-erosion @catladymasterofsqirl RAGHHHHH I LOVE YOU GUYS. you always find the best stuff to play, and although I wouldn't trust Rot to drive a car, I'd still trust you with my life if I came down to it. You're both such, well I've said It a lot already but, brilliant people. It's always fun to hang out with you, whether it's taking and texting about random things, or playing horror games on call, it's always a nice way to Brighten my day!!

@easybakeovenn @drac0line1nn1t ah.. We've been THROUGHHHHH it the past couple years, we'll have known eachother for 2 years this year. Fucking fascinating. I've seen you both grow and I'm so glad I have, you're amazing people. Even if I don't get the opportunity to talk to you, Draco, often due to my Tumblr DMS being broken half the time, I'm still glad we're friends. We need to do Brighton again sometime!!! And koda... Don't perish when you move like a fish in a fishtank....

@thurio-edau thank you, for attacking me in my DMS and SWARMING me with one of my first SBG posts. Else I'd not have known half the amazing people like @ohquail or @fly-in-amber or Kaz (who's tag ive forgotten... I'm GREATTTT at this, if you couldn't tell) you're funny and I'll never forget when you cut the chocolate with that dagger necklace

Special mentions than I can't write a paragraph for because my early onset probable arthritis is kicking in and my wrists are dying slowly: @low-senka @carpetbug @primalmagic @afrogwhocantdraw @sashaishere14 @cookiedough77 @pineapple-sbg-official (I'm @cimonofficial I just didn't know your main and honestly, you're pretty cool so you make it here too!! YIPPEE)

And all my other moots. Ily guys MWAH happy new year!!

[chanelnumbermine]

hii! could you write some kimi x reader fluff? please and thank youu<3

sure i can! buckle up, teenage feels incoming!

second first | andrea kimi antonelli x gn!reader

warnings: none! bit awkwardness and butterflies flying around

summary: what happens when you’re both way too awkward and stressed about the first date?

you and kimi were introduced by mutual friends, hanging out from time to time with the group

you always seemed to laugh so much together, discussing zombie apocalypse survival, different types of zombies, and even what you would do if you had to face them together!

that thought always made both of you giggle and blush, much to the amusement of your friends

“god, just go on a date already! we’re tired of your endless yapping, jeez”

and so you did

“um, well, would you uh-“ “right! mm, yeah, i’d love to go have lunch!” “-hand me my phone, well, uhh, that too!! sorry, thank you! i’ll text you the address”

you scratched your neck in embarrassment, and he hid his face in his hands

"sorry-" "you don't have to-"

you both spoke at the same time and burst into laughter

it was easier to laugh than to speak, with all your friends around and the weight of your own undefined feelings lingering in your mind

the restaurant was nice, maybe too noce for two teenagers to have their first date and it was obvious someone was trying *really* hard

kimi was wearing a suit, a suspiciously well tied tie around his neck: a consequence of ollie's lessons and eventually doing it himself because kimi's hands were shaking too much

and here you were, looking like an absolute vision and staring right into his eyes

"andrea, what did you get yourself into?" he muttered under his breath in italian

a thousand thoughts were racing through his mind: should i kiss their hand? should i wave? hug them?

it looked like he was going to shake your hand and ended up giving you an awkward side hug, getting confused with his moves...

oh dear

the whole evening is filled with shy glances and occasional stuttering

it's just so hard to keep your eyes away from kimi's shining eyes you end up staring

"i'll get it, okay?" he said shyly and you blinked a few times to get back to reality

"uhh, sorry?" he titled his head forward, equally confused, he couldn't tell you were staring as he was too busy fighting his intrusive thoughts

"would it be too forward? too old-fashioned? but mom said-"

he ends up paying and you manage to stammer out a thanks and soon you're outside, trying to form a coherent sentence and say farewell

"it was really-" "i can't thank you-"

"please, you first"

you stifled a laugh and smiled awkwardly before speaking up again

“tonight was really nice and i really appreciate you for taking me out to such a nice place and uhh… i fell sorry that-“

“that it was so awkward?” he finished with a lopsided grin “yeah, im sorry too. but maybe, well, that doesn’t mean it’s completely over, right?” his voice heightened and he gesticulated a lot “i mean, i like you, like, a lot-“

“i like you too, kimi” you whispered, the confession causing both of you to blush like crazy

“really?? i mean, amazing! so does that, well, could i get another chance?”

“another chance at what?” you asked and titled your head

“at taking you out on a first date. second first date or whatever, i want it to be really perfect this time, i swear, you’ll love it this time-“

you cut him off by pressing a small kiss to his cheek

“of course, kimi. let’s just have a good time together, right?” you asked shyly

“yeah, right. whatever you like” he grinned stupidly

he will definitely make sure this chance isn’t a wasted one

masterlist

[impala124]

Bad Buddy Ep 9

My thoughts on Ep 1 | Ep 2 | Ep 3 | Ep 4 | Ep 5 | Ep 6 | Ep 7 | Ep 8

Me, at the end of this episode:

Well, I finally got to know what Patshottiversay is about, which started this whole Bad Buddy liveblog thing. So, there's that. As for my thoughts on the entire episode, here we go:

Wai was feeling hurt that Pran lied to him about his relationship with Pat and decided to out them as a form of retaliation. Still don't know if he's the one who saw them leave in the car together, though.

Okay, cut to the final play; Pat is smiling and clapping, but Pran appears to be a bit more subdued and peeking glances at Wai. Now, I thought Wai couldn't be a part of the play because of time constraints, which was the reason why Pran's ass was anywhere near this play.

Don't tell me that Wai is giving Pran the silent treatment after pulling that stunt. THE AUDACITY!!! He is. Pran is apologizing, which I kinda understand, but Wai really needs to get off his high horse. Are you sure you want to pull the best friend card here, Wai? After what you did in response?

Oh no, Pat became the faculty pariah; at least that's what Korn is saying. I'm sure it must've felt good for Pat to (supposedly) have Korn on his side.

I would actually pay good money to watch Pat talk to Wai for Pran. Thank you, Pat, for calling out your boyfriend on his avoidant behavior.

Awwww, Pat asking if Pran wants him to post a status saying that they broke up to get Wai to talk to him is 😭😭😭.

Guys, I don't feel good about this rugby practice. Okay, Pat's fine, at least physically.

I mean, Korn is being fun and playful, which must feel nice for Pat, but I'm still reserving judgment. His reaction just doesn't seem genuine, you know?

Pran is waiting in the bleachers for his jock boyfriend to finish rugby practice.

I have to admit that I let out a chuckle at the inhaler product placement in this tense atmosphere.

I'm sure their flirting is just pissing Wai off. Oh Wai, you really showed your attention-seeking ass there, didn't you?

So, let me get this straight: Pran only came to rugby practice to make his boyfriend sniff on an inhaler. ASFSHGF—

Yay, double date with Pa and Ink. My darlings. Okay, so, let's settle this once and for all. WHO SEDUCED WHOM? I'll have to go with Pat seducing Pran because Pran would have never taken the first step.

Ink trying to stir up the pot by asking Pat if he were lying about having feelings for her is just chef's kiss.

See, Ink saw PatPran coming from a mile. I mean, since Ink knows about their parents rivalry, even if she didn't want to broach that subject with the guys, I expected her to bring it up with Pa. Am I showing my nosy ass over here?

Ink, babygirl, I hope you weren't going for subtle with the "Are you being hit on by anyone?" Because it wasn't subtle, at all. These girls will be the death of me.

Ink, girl, what are you playing at? Please don't toy with Pa's feelings.

The domesticity!!!! "Can you stop being a big, clingy dog for one second?" Don't be lying now, Pran; you like him exactly like that.

Pa is the ever-suffering child that has to witness her parents PDA.

Wai is still mad, and Pat is kind of done seeing his boyfriend being sad.

I just hope the drink sales went through the roof after the episodes aired because they worked hard for the product placement to seem natural.

What in the what now, you take a sip of the drink and lose control over your bodily movements?! Maybe I'm not the target customer for this.

We are back to their regular flirting now. Pran saying, "All I know is if you lose, you won't get anything," in response to Pat's, "If I win, will I get more than the drink?" AAAAHHHHHH!

Game time!! I just have this feeling that Pat's going to end up getting hurt. Hope I'm wrong.

Okay, so none of Pran's friends are talking to him.

What crawled up Wai's ass now? This is a team sport; remember your rugby scholarship? Why are you half-assing it?

Pat, baby boy, a fight is what he wants, and you're giving it to him.

I think Pat is smart for saying, "I'll ask the coach to not send me onto the field if you can guarantee a win," to Wai—it indicates that the team winning is the thing that matters the most to him.

WAI PASSED THE BALL TO PAT!!!Pran also moved closer to his friends on the bleachers. And they won!!!

Pat definitely deserves to get whatever he wants from Pran after leading the team to victory and bridging the gap between Pran and his friends.

Well, Wai is still sulking, but at least it's off the field, and that's expected and normal atp.

I'd be worried if he were treating Pat like a friend now.

The other team seems like they are a bunch of sore losers. God, I hope they won't plan a sneak attack at night for revenge or anything like that. I don't know; I just have this gut feeling that someone will end up getting hurt.

All Pat wants is just to be babygirled by Pran. Is this the more you were talking about earlier, Pat? The reward after your win? Well, they got cockblocked by Korn.

They are at a bar celebrating their win. I don't want anyone injured at the end of the night, but my spidey senses are tingling.

Oh no, the losing team is at the place where Wai works, and the guy recognized him. I smell trouble in the air. HE DID NOT JUST PULL A GUN ON WAI. WTF???!!!

Thank God that Wai is trying to de-escalate the situation. Thank you, good stranger, who was just carrying his drunk friend out and inadvertently helped Wai.

Now, Pat's friends are also at the same place. So, the sore loser isn't done yet.

Oh, this takes me back in time. Remember when Pat's friends did the same to Wai? Pat remained passive back then, but he's butting in right now. Wai is asking Pat to back off, and he did, but I don't trust the look on that sore loser's face.

Pat, bestie, where are your friends? Why are you walking alone on a deserted street at night after that interaction?

Pat, RUN! Why are you trying to fight them? You are outnumbered.

Okay, Pat's friends are here.

Oh, no, he pulled the fucking gun. Are you shitting me right now??? This is how PAT GOT SHOT??!

I'm sorry, but why was that one of the funniest gunshots I've ever seen?

Guys, it's just so surreal. Why did it have to be a gun? I think it would've made more sense for it to be a knife the way they fought over it. You know, a knife stabbing instead of the gunshot wound. I would've taken it more seriously then, maybe.

Pran's in the hospital, on his way to cuss Pat's ass out, I hope.

Why are Pat's friends acting like that? Pat, sir, why are you breathing like that?

To kiss your boyfriend?! I'm softening up to Pat's friends a bit. They are just immature but don't mean any harm.

Apparently no one is taking this seriously because a gun went off in the middle of the night and the patient was just brought to the hospital. WHERE ARE THE COPS? Did they contact his parents?? Pat is 19 at the max. They should inform someone, RIGHT?!

WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S JUST A GRAZE WOUND AND A BANDAGE IS ENOUGH, Pat? Huh? I feel like I'm going INSANE!!

Thank God the cops showed up. Now, why are the cops being dumb and assuming that Pat shot himself with his own firearm?

How about an investigation? Maybe send it to the lab for fingerprint analysis or check if the gun is registered under someone's name?

Why do I have to tell the cops how to do their job? They're charging him already. Man, what is this???!

Well, I guess it's good that Wai told everyone that Pat helped him the previous night.

I'm sorry, but what do you mean they are charging him without any investigation?

"Without any proof to confirm it isn't his, he's over." Is this how the justice system works? Aren't the cops supposed to provide irrefutable proof that the person committed the crime before they charge them?

Did they take witness statements? Do the police even know that others have fled the scene?

Now, why are these college kids trying to bring the others who fled the crime scene in? Shouldn't the police do that?

Since they played a game against them with a referee and all, they must have a record of their government names somewhere. Why don't they just turn the list over to the police?

Okay, I guess Wai is going to use the footage where the guy pulled the gun on him to prove Pat's innocence.

I mean, good, but why aren't we sharing this information with the police?! Why are you doing the work for them?

Why are the police acting like they are the fucking debt collectors and not public servants?

Well, at least Pran is getting his morning cardio in.

I'm not taking this seriously anymore. Now I understand the jokes; it's a way of coping with the absurdity of the situation.

Pran saved his boyfriend's ass, I guess.

Can someone explain to me like I'm five years old what the purpose of this whole thing was? I will expand upon this later.

Is it to show that Wai is okay with their relationship? I got that feeling after Wai asked Pat to step away from the fight the previous night.

Wait a second. Pat got shot, and no one informed Pa, you know, his sister who lives with him?

Okay, Wai and Pat are bantering now?! "My friend almost became a widower there."😂😂 These are not serious people.

God, they're so sweet with each other that it's almost making me forget about what all has transpired.

PAT'S FAMILY FINALLY SHOWED UP. Pa, sweetheart, you could've sent your brother a message that you're coming with your parents to visit him.

Now, why is the father acting like Pran shot Pat? Uncle, I'm sorry, my brain is already fried right now; I can't deal with you and your decades old rivalry at this moment.

Okay, real talk now. I honestly feel a bit let down and disrespected. The series has been building up to something extraordinary, and now I get this?! Did something happen in the writers room? There was an underlying tonal shift almost as if they were laughing at me for taking this show seriously. I mean, someone needs to answer for this. Now, let me try and summarise what all they tried to accomplish this episode:

Everyone in the university knows about their relationship and they face consequences for it.

They wanted Wai to be okay with Pat and Pran being together.

They wanted Pran to face Pat's parents and them being suspicious of his relationship with their son.

Cool, got it. Let's examine how they went about achieving each of these now and how else they could've accomplished the same because honestly this is how I'm feeling right now:

So, the whole university knows that these two guys from all-time rival faculties are now dating, and almost nothing happens? Pat gets treated like an outcast for 2 seconds. I mean, he was selected as class president by his seniors. If they really wanted me to take their faculty rivalry seriously, I would've gotten at least one scene where Pat was forced to make a choice between his relationship with Pran or his position of power in the faculty. I don't know, maybe my expectations were a lot higher for what the fallout for each would be. At least there were some repercussions for Pran dating Pat and keeping it a secret from his friends. The whole response to the reveal felt very anticlimactic (to me).

Now, let's talk about Pat getting shot. It was just unnecessary. Wai was already okay with Pat after Pat intervened in the club when Wai was being mistreated. He would've stopped being mad at Pran eventually and come around about their relationship given some time.

What about Pran running into Pat's parents and them being suspicious of their relationship? Could they have accomplished it without having Pran run into them in the hospital? Yes, I don't know why we are forgetting this, but they live in the same dorms and are neighbors. Given how frequently they have sleepovers, Pat's father could've just dropped by like he did previously in Ep 2, if I'm not wrong, and maybe find some of Pran's things lying around and take it from there. Instead of going through all that, given Pat's dad's propensity for just dropping by the university to meet one of his professor friends, he could've just seen them holding hands on a bench outside, somewhere, anywhere.

We still don't know who actually saw them leave together in Pat's car. Wai didn't recall it when he was going through his montage of Pran lying to my face about his relationship with Pat moments. I thought I'd see Pran's mom at the play because she apparently gets a bat signal whenever her son is near a musical instrument with Pat, but maybe not in this case?

Okay, I'm being snarky now, but it's because I feel duped. Maybe I'm taking this show too seriously, but until Ep 8, the show told me that it wants to be taken seriously. I hope it's just a one-off and they'll find their footing with the next episode.

Tagging the usual suspects: @shortpplfedup, @incandescentflower, @starryalpacasstuff, @7nessasaryevils, @greenteadumplings, @grapejuicegay, @madworld-bbs, @usodeshou, @tao-moonb, @fanatic-freakshow @desi-yearning. If anyone wishes to be tagged in the future, let me know.