#and tyler's gorgeous face is just a fun bonus ��️

[pardonmydelays]

also i need to stop being mentally insane in the tags cause my friends think i only listen to twenty one pilots because tyler joseph is hot

[fanforthefics]

tyler/jamie childhood best friends au

Jamie eyes the building skeptically. It’s not, he guesses, actually particularly intimidating–it’s just a Boston apartment building–but it is…well, it has a doorman. Jamie was lucky his last apartment had doors. 

But he’d known, sort of, what to expect, coming up to visit Tyler, and Tyler’s at the end of it, he tells himself. Tyler makes everything slot back into place. 

So he shoulders his old duffel bag of shit that he’d brought, and goes up to the doorman to give his name. 

The lobby is–again, it’s not like, super sparkly or anything, but it’s nice. Sleek and modern. Jamie feels ratty and conspicuous here, waiting as the doorman rings up to Tyler’s apartment; he hunches his shoulders but the basic fact is Jamie’s always been too big to be inconspicuous. 

“You can go up,” The doorman tells him, with actually a pretty nice smile. “Elevators are to your right.” 

“Thank you,” Jamie mutters to him, and goes to the elevator. It’s got mirrors in it, reflecting up and around and back and him staring at himself a thousand times, which no one needs to see. 

He goes up to the fifteenth floor, gets out. He’s halfway down the hallway when a door swings open, and there’s a yell. “Jamie, fuck! Jamie!” Tyler shouts, and then Jamie’s opening his arms on instinct and Tyler’s barreling into them, the same warm solid weight as always, and Jamie ducks his head into Tyler’s temple and breathes as everything slots into place, like it has since they were ten and playing street hockey until everyone else went home. 

“You’re here, fuck,” Tyler mutters into Jamie’s neck. His aftershave is different–it’s spicier now than it was before. “God, I’ve missed you.” 

And that’s Tyler, always so quick to say shit like that, the shit that gets stuck in Jamie’s throat. “You too,” Jamie says. It’s been–fuck, it’s been years, because Tyler’s schedule never quite overlaps with school breaks, and they’ve both been so busy. They text all the time, of course, and they try to Facetime at least once a month, but–it’s not the same. 

Then there’s barking, and another body comes out of the room. Jamie lets go of Tyler to kneel down to meet him, ducking his head as Marshall starts licking at his face. “Hi, yes, hi boy,” Jamie tells him, petting his head and laughing. “Yes, you’re a good boy.” 

“Okay, Marsh, share some of Uncle Jamie’s love,” Tyler tells his dog, but when Jamie looks up at him, he’s grinning down at them, like he’s never seen anything better. 

“Okay, come on.” Tyler bounces back. He’s put on muscle since Jamie’s seen him last; he’s always been ripped but now he’s sculpted too. Because what Jamie’s sanity really needed was for Tyler to be even more gorgeous. 

But Jamie’s had a long time to ignore that, when Tyler beams at him and tugs at his arm like an eager dog. “Come on, let’s get inside.” 

“Yeah,” Jamie agrees, and as always, lets Tyler pull him along, into his orbit. It’s always been like that, since they were kids–Tyler was the exciting one, who made things happen, who drew people in, who was going to be the big NHL star. And Jamie was–well, Tyler was loyal and held onto people, Jamie guesses. So even when they stopped living down the street from each other, even when they should have outgrown each other, Tyler held on. And Jamie’s spent years trying not to remind him that maybe he shouldn’t. 

“Here we go.” Tyler leads Jamie into the apartment, gestures around. “It’s–I mean, I can give you the grand tour, but it’s pretty open concept. Uh, kitchen, dining room, living room.” He wave to each part of the sweeping main room as he names it. “Then, here, down this hall is the bedrooms.” He points out his, the guest bathroom–of course he has a guest bathroom–and then the spare bedroom, where Jamie will be staying. Jamie drops his bag there, on the center of the queen bed, before Tyler’s ushering him back out into the main room.

“So?” he asks, and he has that look he gets sometimes, like he’s so anxious for approval. Jamie worries about that look, more than sometimes–worries what would happen if he started looking for the approval of the wrong people. Tyler likes to be liked, and that’s dangerous. 

But for now, he’s looking at Jamie. “What do you think?” 

Jamie looks around. It’s all big and high ceiling-ed and sleek, and it’s very much the product of NHL money, but it’s also–Tyler’s shit is everywhere and there are empty beer cans and gatorade bottles on the counter and unwashed dishes in the sink and Marshall sprawled out on the couch. Those are the important things, he reminds himself. 

“It’s great,” Jamie tells Tyler, with his most sincere smile. “Really, Segs. Great.” 

“Well I needed something to do with my signing bonus,” Tyler grins again. “Want anything? Water? Beer? I figured we could chill for a while or we could go sightseeing, then there’s a party tonight we can go to, and I’ve got a game tomorrow that I got you tickets for, and Blacker’s having a thing after that, and if you need something to do Brownie can show you around, and–” 

“You don’t have to amuse me, Tyler,” Jamie laughs, and shoves at his shoulder to shut him up. “You know me, I’m fine with just like, a video game setup and some wifi.” 

“I want you to enjoy yourself,” Tyler insists, but he gives Jamie the wifi password anyway. It’s a very Tyler thing–he tolerates, but has never really understood, that Jamie doesn’t need to always be moving to be entertained. Tyler always needs people, action. And that doesn’t seem to be a problem here. 

“Want to play Call of Duty?” Jamie suggests, and Tyler smirks. 

“Yeah, you can remember how much I always kick your ass.” 

“Fuck you,” Jamie retorts, and Tyler shoos Marshall off the couch so that they can sit on it. Tyler’s TV and game set up is fucking massive, but that’s settling, in a way. This is something Jamie’d always known Tyler would spend money on the second he got it. 

Tyler wins the first game, because maybe he always has been better, but then Jamie starts winning the next one so easily that he looks over at Tyler to make sure he’s still there. 

He is, but he’s also looking at Jamie, not the screen. “What?” Jamie demands, suddenly on edge again. He’s too big, too awkward, too–

“I’m just glad you’re here,” Tyler says, ducking his head a little so he doesn’t meet Jamie’s eyes. 

“Yeah,” Jamie agrees, and nudges Tyler’s knee with his. “Me too.” 

///

They spend the rest of the afternoon playing video games, and Tyler bullies Jamie into taking a picture with Marshall in exchange for just hanging out and not going sightseeing or anything, and it’s fun. It’s like they’re back home, back before Tyler became Tyler Seguin, #2 draft pick of the Boston Bruins, and Jamie didn’t change at all. They order dinner from an Italian place Tyler likes so he can sort of keep to his meal plan and Jamie can eat what he wants too, even if Tyler refuses to let Jamie pay him back for his half–”Bro, I ate most of it anyway, and you’re the one who travelled, come on”–and then Tyler herds Jamie into his room to get ready to go to the party. 

Jamie, knowing Tyler, did actually pack clothes for a party, even if his clothes for a party are just dark jeans and a black button down that Jenny says look good on him. He messes with his hair a little, but really there’s just not much to be done with that, so he finishes before Tyler does, then wanders back out into the living room to mess around on Twitter and play with Marshall. 

“Here’s my two favorite guys,” Tyler says, finally coming back in. Jamie glances up–and swallows. Tyler always looks good, but this is a different sort of good. The sort of good that comes from money and comfort in that world, that easy confidence in himself Tyler’s always had that Jamie’s leached off of for more than ten years. 

Jamie straightens, goes to run a hand through his hair before he remembers all the shit in it. “Hey, ready?” 

“Hm?” Tyler blinks. He’d definitely been staring at Jamie. “Yeah, let’s go, the guys’ll meet us there.” 

“Do I look okay?” Jamie asks. Tyler’s still stealing looks at him, and Tyler’s a dick sometimes but he wouldn’t let Jamie leave the house not looking right. 

“Um. Yeah. Definitely. You look hot.” Tyler leans down to kiss Marshall’s head, then ruffles his fur. “Be back soon,” he tells his dog.  

“Good to know you still spoil him rotten,” Jamie says, as Tyler closes the door behind them. Tyler raises an eyebrow at Jamie. 

“So you didn’t give him any treats?” he asks, and Jamie shakes his head, trying and failing to look innocent. 

“Nope.” 

“You’re a shitty liar, Benny.” 

“Well, what am I supposed to do?” Jamie asks, giving the lie up as lost. “I have to make sure he remembers his uncle Jamie.” 

“You could come visit more,” Tyler suggests, as they leave the elevator to get into the cab that’ll apparently take them to the party. “Then he’d definitely remember you.” 

“I don’t have the time or the money, Segs, you know–” 

“I have the money, though,” Tyler cuts in, looking mulish. They’ve had this argument before. “It’s stupid to not see you for a year when I could–” 

“When you could what, pay me just to sit around and hang out with you?” Jamie asks, and Tyler gives Jamie the irritated look he gets when Jamie says things he doesn’t want to hear. “It’ll be easier now I’m not in school, Ty. I’ll be able to take vacation when I want.” 

“Maybe when I have bye weeks,” Tyler muses, looking out the window. “You can come with me to Cabo! It’s the best.” 

Jamie will not make enough money to go to Cabo with Tyler and his new guys, who either have enough money or mooch enough money off of Tyler to just do things like that. To live that life. But it’s not worth starting the argument now, so Jamie just hums and nods, and then Tyler starts talking about the Red Sox, and Jamie has to give him shit for that. 

They get to the party–at some club that looks exclusive but Jamie couldn’t pick out of a lineup that someone must have rented out–and indeed, Tyler’s guys are waiting there, a pack of bros of the type that Tyler collects around him. 

“Seggy!” they greet him, with various back slaps and bro hugs and fist bumps, and Tyler gets a hand on Jamie’s wrist and holds him steady. 

“This is Jamie,” Tyler announces to the group, “He in college so he has proof he’s smarter than all of you combined, and he’s my best friend so he’s awesome.” 

“I thought I was your best friend,” someone objects, and Tyler grins at him as Jamie bristles. 

“You’re my boy, Brownie,” Tyler tells the guy, “But Jamie’s Jamie, sorry.” It helps. To hear Tyler say that, like a fact. “Okay, Benny. This is–” He goes around, and the guys all do the nod or handshake or whatever, but the names honestly go in and out of Jamie’s ears. He won’t be here long enough for them to matter, and he doesn’t expect them to talk to him much either. 

The only one he does register is Brownie, the guy who has said he was Tyler’s best friend. Jamie’s heard about him before, knows he’s one of Tyler’s closest friends, and from what Jamie’s heard he’s a good guy. That doesn’t mean it feels any better to see him joke with Tyler, to see how easy they are together, how well Brownie fits both into this space and with Tyler. 

But honestly, Jamie’s had a lot of practice being awkward and holding up a wall at parties Tyler dragged him to, because that was most of high school, so he does well enough. He gets a beer and drinks it and chats with a girl who comes up to him about baseball, even though it’s not like he’s going to take her home, and then when Tyler comes over and throws himself onto his back and orders him to come get more tequila with him, he does. He takes the tequila shot, watches as Tyler’s adam’s apple bobs, as his lips get slick with the alcohol, and lets Tyler drag him over to the pool tables, where they run the old gag of Jamie acting like an idiot and Tyler acting drunk to fleece everyone out of their money, which has worked since they were barely old enough to see over the tables. 

Tyler knows better than to try to get Jamie on the dance floor; he leaves him after pool at a table with Brownie and some of the other guys as he goes off to dance with a pretty blonde girl in a short skirt and pink lip gloss. 

Jamie takes a sip of his beer. Brownie’s eying him. 

“What?” Jamie asks, his back going up again. He knows he gets defensive, in spaces like this. He just can’t help it. 

“I’ve just heard a lot about you,” Brownie says, with the sort of calm that comes from being pretty drunk. “You’re not what I expected.” 

“Um. Sorry?” Jamie tries, because he doesn’t know what to say to that. “I mean, Tyler and I have been friends a long time?”

“I know,” Brownie tells him, then gets up. He stumbles a little, but he makes it to the dance floor, where he somehow joins Tyler and the girl he’s dancing with in a way that seems smooth and easy. Jamie takes another swig of his beer. 

///

They make it back to Tyler’s late, with Tyler drunk enough that he’s hanging off of Jamie and Jamie drunk enough that he’s not quite steady enough to hang off of Tyler. It’s another move that’s comfortable–Jamie’s usually the DD, and he doesn’t mind. Drinking at parties often just makes him feel more awkward. 

So Jamie digs the keys out of Tyler’s pockets, opens the door, pets Marshall when he comes to greet them, and then goes to pour Tyler into bed. 

Tyler’s bedroom looks like it has everywhere he’s lived since Jamie knew him–messy and full of sports shit. There are pictures on the wall–one of him and his family, one of the Bruins with the Cup. One of him and Jamie, all of fourteen and decked out in hockey gear, with their arms slung around each other and grinning up at the camera. 

Jamie sighs, and looks back to the bed, where Tyler’s lying, then turns to leave. 

“Jamie?” Tyler asks, low. 

Jamie freezes. “Yeah?” 

Tyler props himself up. He’s staring at Jamie, eyes wide. “I just wanted to make sure you were really here. That I didn’t dream you.” 

Jamie grins. “Really here, bro.” 

“Good.” Tyler burps, and then drops back onto the blankets. “Did you have fun tonight?” he asks. Maybe more demands. 

“Yeah,” Jamie says, because he did, for some of it, and it’s clearly what Tyler needs to hear. 

“Really? I want you to have fun.” A yawn. “Want you to like it.”

“I like you,” Jamie assures him. “Now get some sleep, and drink water.” 

“Yes sir,” Tyler raises a hand in what he probably means to be a salute, and Jamie goes back to his room, where he can face plant onto the big bed and sleep it off. 

///

Somehow–Jamie’s guessing practice–Tyler’s gone by the time Jamie wakes up the next morning, and there’s a note on the table telling him that Marshall’s walked and that he’ll be home after morning skate but if Jamie wants to go out he can meet him somewhere, and there’s a key in the junk drawer. Being Tyler, of course he doesn’t mention breakfast or anything like that, but Jamie knows Tyler and so knows where to find the coffee and stuff to make himself toast. 

Then he surfs the TV until he finds a shitty action movie he doesn’t really have to pay attention to, and stretches out on the couch. He should be doing homework, but it’s been a long senior year already and he’s dreading job searching, and honestly Jamie feels like he’d be happy just here for a week, lying on a couch surrounded by Tyler-things, with the knowledge that Tyler will be home later. Jamie’s lived near or at home most of his life, but somehow, just knowing Tyler’s nearby makes this more comfortable than his childhood bed. 

He dozes all morning, and then is woken up by something crashing. Jamie looks up to see Tyler in the kitchen, juggling bags. 

“You okay?” he asks, rubbing his eyes. 

“Yeah–sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up.” 

“I’ve slept enough,” Jamie tells him, and gets up to wander over to the kitchen. “Anyway, I’d rather hang out with you.” That gets him a huge grin, one of the ones that takes over Tyler’s whole face and lights up Jamie from the inside out. He wonders if any of Tyler’s new friends can make Tyler smile like that. 

They have lunch, then Tyler has to take his pre-game nap so Jamie writes an email home and attaches a picture of Jamie, Tyler, and Marshall, because his mom will like that. 

Then they go to the game, and Tyler has to go down to the locker room but he gets Jamie settled in a box first–with the rest of the families, he says, as he waves goodbye to Jamie. It’s–Jamie’s been to Tyler’s games before. He played hockey, before he decided that juniors wasn’t the path for him. And he’s been to NHL games before. 

But it’s not like being in the box. It’s full of WAGs and some kids and suits, and Jamie feels out of place in his jeans and Chara jersey–a joke, because Jamie had told Tyler once years ago that he’s not wearing his jersey until he gets a Gordie Howe, which they both know isn’t going to happen. Jamie would wear a Seguin jersey if Tyler asked–there isn’t much he wouldn’t do, if Tyler asked–but now it’s easier, just to wear the captain jersey. He gets fewer questions, this way, from all these fancy people who give him sidelong looks like they aren’t sure why he’s here. One–a nice older woman–asks who he’s here for, and he tells her he’s Tyler’s friend, which gets an eyebrow raise and, in a tone of surprise, an exclamation that he looks like a nice young man. Jamie doesn’t really know what to say to that, and so the conversation fizzles, and Jamie goes back to watching the game. 

It’s a good game. They’re the defending Stanley Cup champions and it shows, and Tyler’s on fire, just lighting everything up. It makes Jamie want to yell and scream and make sure everyone in the booth is watching, that they all know just how brilliant Tyler is, just how fucking good. 

But it doesn’t seem like he has to. All around the stands, people are cheering, and when Tyler scores he lifts his stick and the crowd cheers, and Jamie can see Tyler’s face on the jumbotron, his huge grin and how he’s feeding off of the crowd. He shines so bright here, and Jamie’s so proud of him, but–Jamie looks down at his scuffed shoes. He’s not nearly that bright. 

Tyler had given him express instructions afterwards to come down to the locker room, so Jamie does, loitering by the door and getting some questioning looks while he mumbles something about being friends with Seguin, until Tyler bounces out in just a towel around his waist and tugs at his wrist. 

“Great game!” Jamie tells him, ruffling his hair, and Tyler bats at his hands but he’s still beaming. 

“All for you baby,” he says with a wink, and Jamie rolls his eyes. 

“Yeah, put some pants on,” Jamie retorts, and Tyler laughs again and holds the door open so they can go into the locker room. Tyler’s clearly still keyed up; instead of actually getting dressed he tows Jamie around and introduces him to everyone, and Jamie barely has time to realize he’s meeting people whose hockey he idolized before Tyler’s pulling him over–”Z! Have you met Jamie? He’s your biggest fan,” and “Jamie, this is Marchy, he’s the worst and don’t listen to anything he says.” Jamie doesn’t know what he says in return, but it definitely isn’t anything that’s going to impress anyone. 

The guys are all nice, of course, even if they also just played a hockey game and so don’t really want to meet Tyler’s random friend. But Chara smiles and nods and makes a few words of small talk, and Marchand makes a joke but trading notes on keeping Tyler in line, and Bergeron shakes his hand, looking dignified and serious and Jamie manages not to freak out but is definitely bright red. 

“It’s good to meet you, Jamie,” he says, calm but with a smile in his eyes. “Tyler talks about you all the time.” 

“All of it good, I promise,” Tyler adds. “I haven’t said anything about the thing with the goat.“

“Tyler!” Jamie hisses, going even redder. He rubs at the back of his neck. “Sorry,” he tells Patrice fucking Bergeron, “I swear he wasn’t really raised in a barn.” 

“We’re used to him,” Bergeron says, laughing a little. “What are you boys up to while you’re here?” 

“We’re going out tonight, then sightseeing tomorrow. I want to show Jamie all the sights,” Tyler pipes in, wrapping his arm around Jamie’s shoulders. He still hasn’t put pants on, or a shirt, and it’s a lot of skin pressed up close to Jamie. He’s not used to it, anymore. And fucking Bergeron’s right there. 

“Well, have fun.” Bergeron says, with that dignified smile. Jamie swallows. “Hopefully I’ll see you again before I leave, Jamie.” 

Jamie mumbles something, then turns into Tyler as Bergeron walks away. “You can’t just spring him on me, Segs!” he hisses, leaning down so that only Tyler can hear him. 

Tyler gives him an impish smile back. “What, me?” 

“I had the hugest fucking crush on him and now he thinks I’m an idiot–” 

“I think that’s the wrong tense, Benny, and you didn’t come off like an idiot. Just maybe a little star struck.” 

“Because I am!” Jamie glances around, then drops his voice to a whisper. “You hang out with them all the time, but I’m not used to meeting NHL stars!” 

“You get used to it,” Tyler tells him, tilting his head up. His lips are swollen from his mouthguard, and he’s still lit up from the game. “Okay, I’m going to get changed, then we’re going out.” 

///

Once more, Jamie’s not sure where they are. It’s quieter than last night, at least–less of a club and more of a bar, but the kind of place with a rope and a minimum in the quadruple digits. Some of the guys from last night are there, and most of them give him a friendly nod–or, in Brownie’s case, a wary nod, and Jamie isn’t sure what he did to piss him off but he’s not apologizing for nothing–but there are new people, too, crowding around their table with Tyler at the center of it, the sun everyone orbits. Jamie gets it. Jamie’s been orbiting him too, for over a decade. 

But–they’re all talking, about people they know and parties they’ve been too and shit they’ve done, and it’s going fast and back and forth and Tyler’s in the thick of it, and there’s Jamie. Tyler keeps Jamie next to him with a hand firm on his thigh, and he looks over every so often with an eager smile, checking in–Jamie always smiles back, because he can’t not–but there’s nothing else for Jamie to contribute, here. This isn’t his life. This is as far from his life as it’s possible to be. His life is libraries and homework and a job at the end of it, something steady and boring and nothing that will give him this sort of lifestyle. Jamie doesn’t even want this sort of lifestyle. 

So he drinks the shots that are put in front of him and he smiles when Tyler smiles at him and he knows he’s drawing inward, getting into his head, but he can’t help it. He just wants–he wants to be fourteen again and chasing each other around a rink, sleeping over and whispering secrets in the dark, back when everything was simple and it didn’t matter so much that Tyler was bright and Jamie was dull. 

He really tries not to ruin the night, but Tyler knows him as well as he knows Tyler, and so he must see that Jamie’s flagging because he bows them out early–barely 1 am–and gets them in an uber home. Jamie’s not drunk, but he’s not not drunk either; enough not not drunk to slide a little too close to Tyler in the cab, so their shoulders are pressed together. When it’s just him and Tyler, it’s easier. Tyler’s hand rests on his thigh again, a warm heavy weight that Jamie knows better than to think too hard about. 

They get to Tyler’s building, and then they’re up the elevator and greeting Marshall in Tyler’s big, high-ceilinged, gorgeously unattainable apartment, and Tyler follows Jamie into the spare room, takes a seat on the bed. 

“Everything okay?” he asks, tentative but not unsure. “You’re doing the internal thing.” 

“It’s fine.” Jamie can’t tell Tyler this. 

“It’s not fine,” Tyler insists. “You’re sad, and I hate that, and just–look, it’s just me. You can tell me everything.” 

Jamie looks down at him–at Tyler on his bed, with that bright smile and gorgeous everything and the NHL success clear from his shoes to his apartment. Maybe Jamie is drunker than he thought, because instead of more denial, what comes out is, “What am I even doing here?” 

Tyler’s smile falters. “What?” 

“Why am I here?” Jamie gestures around the room. “I’m not–this. This isn’t me. I don’t know how to be this.” 

“What’s this?” 

“All of it! Your brilliant shiny new life here!” Jamie waves again. “With your clubs and shiny new friends and I’m just–boring. I don’t fit. Maybe it’s time to let it die.” 

“Fuck that!” Tyler on his feet now, and he looks really worried. “Did someone say something to you like that? Tell me who and I’ll–” 

“No one needed to say anything.” Jamie sighs. He’s just tired. Tired of wanting, tired of knowing he can’t have. Tired of the slow, bleeding heartbreak that is loving Tyler Seguin. “What room is there for me in your new life, Ty? I’m just some college kid. I’m not celebrity material.” 

“There isn’t room for you in my life,” Tyler says, and Jamie’s breath catches. Okay then. At least he said it. At least Jamie knows. 

“Fine, I can–” he turns, gropes blindly for the doorknob. “I’ll–” 

“No, shit, I didn’t mean that.” Tyler’s always been faster than Jamie; he’s up and between Jamie and the door before he can get a hand on it. “I mean that you aren’t–I don’t make room for you in my life, Jamie. You’re what it’s built on.” 

Jamie blinks. “What?” 

“Fuck, I mean–all of this?” Tyler waves his hand, like Jamie had earlier. “It’s fun, but–you being proud of me is the point.” 

“The point of what?” 

“Everything!” Tyler yells. “Just–fucking everything. Making you proud. Making you happy. It’s all I’ve ever–” he cuts himself off. 

“I am proud of you,” Jamie tells him, because it’s true, always. “I’ve always been proud of you, shit, Tyler. You know that.” He must have, but Jamie can actually see how it hits Tyler, how his eyes widen. “But that doesn’t–I don’t get why you want me here. I’m not fun or exciting or anything else.” 

Tyler swallows. “Do you promise not to hate me?” 

“I think that ship sailed when you pinned breaking your mom’s lamp on me.” 

“She always liked you better, you got off lighter.” Tyler’s looking at Jamie, and there’s a reckless light in his eyes. “Want to know why I want you here? Why I always want you here?” 

“You don’t have to–” Jamie starts, but then Tyler’s closed the distance between them and their lips are touching. They’re kissing. Tyler’s kissing him, and it–Jamie hasn’t had a lot of experience with kissing, but he’s never had a kiss like this before, one that aches. 

Tyler stumbles back. It can’t have been more than a few seconds, but Jamie’s world has turned upside down. Jamie knows what Tyler’s mouth tastes like, now. 

“God, Jamie.” Tyler’s staring, and one hand comes up to touch his lips. Jamie can’t look away. He’s frozen. He never thought–it doesn’t compute. “I’ve been in love with you since I knew what it meant to be in love. Longer, probably. I think I figured out what love was because it was what I felt about you.” 

“Tyler,” Jamie breathes. Tyler shakes his head. 

“And I know you’ve got your own life, and you don’t–” he gulps. “You don’t feel the same way, that I’m just an irresponsible kid, and that’s fine, but I’m still going to–you’re my fucking true north, or whatever, Jamie. And I’m not going to stop trying to make you happy however you need me too. Even if it’s just paying for dinner. Or giving you time with my dog. Or–” 

It’s gone on too long, and Jamie recognizes when Tyler’s starting to spiral, and Jamie might not be able to get his shit together for him, but he can pull it together for Tyler. 

“Tyler,” He interrupts, and Tyler stops talking and bites his lip as he looks up at Jamie, as open a book as always. Jamie should probably say more, give a speech like Tyler did, but Jamie’s always been shitty with words and it would probably come out wrong anyway. “Just–shit,” he says, and then pulls Tyler in to kiss him again. 

Tyler kisses back, eager and with that same ache, until they’re both breathless, and then he pulls away, a bare inch. “Really?” he breathes. 

Jamie nods. He doesn’t fit into Tyler’s life, and he doesn’t know if that’s going to change, or how. But he knows Tyler. Knows them. They’ve figured out worse. “Really,” he says, and pulls Tyler close. 

[kiradurbin]

Super Short Reviews: Spring TV part one:

Russian Doll (Netflix) – Groundhog Day for NY druggies?  Or Mrs. Maisel on special K?  Or is she stuck in a loop in her own video game?  Or is she having the worst mid-life crisis ever?  Or maybe she just really misses her cat?  If you feel too wrapped up in WHY her day keeps repeating you’ve missed the point.... the characters (led by Natasha Lyonne) and the humour are terrific, and don’t even get me started on that wig.  (It IS a wig right???)

American Soul (BET) – Why yes that is Kelly Rowland playing Gladys Kinght!! Soul Train was an iconic American show and its story deserved to be told.  I didn’t care for the soap opera style behind the scenes drama... but what I really liked was the dialogue that did not shy away from the reality of those days... which sadly for the most part have not passed.  

Romance Is a Bonus Book (Netflix) – Korea.   Ohhhhhh this is so adorable and Im so happy I finally like a Korean show.  I love love love Lee Na-Young.   She gives me hope for a better world.   Romantic comedy lovers this is your next binge watch.  

Fast Layne (Disney) – This is the first Disney show I’ve seen that was filmed on location. Automatically it feels better because of that.  The sixth grade girls actually made me giggle and for a second I thought oh I hope my kids want to watch this... but then the car started talking.  Why Why WHY does that voice have to be so ANNOYING?!?!?!?

Umbrella Academy (Netflix) – Wes Anderson meets the Marvel universe. Yay!!!  Two thumbs up from me.  (And big props for humourous song selections.)

Boomerang (BET) – I never saw the movie (don’t yell at me) so I don’t know how it relates to that, but the tv series is fun and funny and sort of like a really upbeat cousin of ATLANTA.

 Whiskey Cavalier (ABC) – Sure fire hit with the 45 and up crowd.  Ana Ortiz (Ugly Betty) and Tyler James Williams (Everybody Loves Chris) made me laugh more in the first episode than any comedy pilot ive seen recently.  By the way if you havent seen the music video for John Newman “Love Me Again” I highly recommend it.  Make sure you watch the full version – the ending is the best.

Riviera (Ovation) – Originally aired in UK 2017.  Can Julia Stiles act?  I cant figure out her appeal.  Her face never moves.  What shines here are the GORGEOUS on location settings and shots.  Good for a summer binge.  

Proven Innocent (Fox) –  Kelsey Grammer as the powerful bad guy and some SUPER annoying girl as a completely unbelievable lead lawyer.   Kelsey Grammer deserves an actual sparring partner and a way better show. Ugh.

Flack (Pop) – UK.  Lascivious fun with Anna Paquin and British playmates.  Beautiful score too.

The Enemy Within (NBC) –   Blindspot... the Blacklist... the Enemy Within.  I guess they couldnt find a way to make the title start with a B.  All the same show to me.  Should be another hit for the 50+ crowd.

Gone (WGN) – originally aired in Canada in 2017.  Chris Noth revives his law enforcement scowl as an FBI agent who recruits a child abductee survivor to help him find missing kids.  Not the first or best show about missing people but you can do a lot worse than Chris Noth at the end of the day when you’re nodding off to sleep on the couch.  

[bellabooks]

A look back on our 2017 publications

Romance, mystery, thrillers, erotica: Bella has it all. 2017 saw releases in all genres, with dashing debuts and ravishing returns. Here’s a look back at all of the new releases for 2017, and as a special bonus, Bella is doing a sale on many of these books this weekend, plus some debut authors from 2016. January 2017   Constellations by Meghan Diane We’re thrilled to have Meghan Diane’s debut novel, Constellations, premiering this January with Bella Books. Traveling photographer Aurora has pledged not to get involved with another woman for six months, but when Rugby player and astronomy buff Phoenix comes into her life, will Aurora be able to resist falling?   Ask, Tell by E.J. Noyes Another Bella new author debut! Set during the oppressive DADT (Don’t Ask Don’t Tell) period in the US military, Captain Sabine Fleischer is feeling the pain of serving in silence while risking her life as a surgeon in a Afghanistan combat hospital. Things get even more complicated when Sabine can’t stop thinking about Colonel Rebecca Keane, her superior officer, and her feelings of attraction may just be reciprocated.   Erased by Robbi McCoy Robbi McCoy’s newest novel is a thrilling sci-fi romance. Imagine chasing a bad guy one moment, and ending up two hundred years in the future, the next. That’s exactly what happens to police officer Dani Barsetti, who is now tasked with taking out a dangerous terrorist. Being in the future has wiped out all traces of Dani in the present, including the life she made with her wife, Gemma. Dani has two weeks before she’s sent back to the future on her mission to try and reconnect with Gemma, and possibly, just possibly fall in love all over again.   New Additions by Becky Harmon Former cop and foster parent, Cassie Thomas, is about to meet her match in foster care worker, Kathleen Masters. Well, make that Kathleen and the four teenage girls she’d like to place in Cassie’s care. Will Cassie’s quiet life at her vacation resort be turned upside down by a quartet of new family members and a possible new romance?   February 2017   Delay of Game by Tracey Richardson Niki Hartling and Eva Caruso are former Olympic hockey competitors, and lovers, torn apart by the pressures of the game. Twelve years later, the women find themselves thrust into each others lives again, now as player and rival coach. Sparks and ice will fly when these two deal with their buried feelings for each other.   Consequences by Sarah Libero   This debut novel by Sarah Libero features Emily, a closeted wife and mother, who loses her husband in what appears to be an accident. When Emily’s path crosses with Detective Kay DeLorme, an undeniable instant attraction ignites, and long hidden feelings rise to the surface. As their relationship deepens, so does Kay’s case and their decisions will have serious consequences.   Party Favors by Jaime Clevenger This choose your own adventure erotica is a must have. You find yourself at a party full of gorgeous women, and each decision you make will lead to a different sexy and sensual conclusion.   Milgrane: Embracing the Sapphire by Y.L. Wigman A massive diamond theft is at the center of this romantic thriller. Constable Taite O’Dath of the Australian Federal Police is on the international hunt for the diamonds. Could the owner of the diamonds, Sabine Zaffiro, actually be involved in the theft? And will she also steal Taite’s heart?   March 2017   Stay With Me by Sheryl Wright In this follow-up to the popular romance, Don’t Let Go, Tyler Marsh and Georgie DiNamico are back as  fiancées and business partners in the DiNamico -Phipps Company. Thinking that the drama is behind them, the couple goes about planning their wedding, but circumstances arise that could derail everything.  Lori Phipps, also a successful businesswoman, gets thrown for a loop when she meets someone unlike anyone else she’s known before. In the Company of Crocodiles by Maggie Brown  Former Australian Secret Service officer Vivian Andrews stumbles upon a body in her sleepy fishing village, and becomes embroiled in a murderous mystery. She’s recruited to help find a missing person by behavioral scientist Claire Walker, and it’s not long before the attraction between Vivian and Claire rises to the surface. But is Claire hiding something? Vivian aims to find out.   No One But You by Catherine Maorisi After the heartbreak of being left at the altar, novelist Lily Alexander is a little gun-shy about getting back into the dating scene. Enter Robin DiLuca, a sexy butch entrepreneur who is looking for fun, but not love. Of course, the instant connection between the two leads to something serious. However, when their baby is born early, Robin’s past comes back to haunt her and she flees, thinking it’s best for her love and their child. Can an encounter with a stranger bring these two back together?   Murder at Metrolina by Kate Merrill Artist Amanda Rittenhouse returns to her childhood home in North Carolina to nurse a broken heart. She rents a space in the Metrolina Tradeshow Expo, and starts to mend her own heart and her relationships with the family she left at 18. Amanda’s mom fancies herself a Nancy Drew and soon the Rittenhouse women have a major mystery on their hands.   April 2017   Speak in Winter Code by S.M. Harding S.M. Harding’s latest romantic thriller picks up after the events of I Will Meet You There and A Woman of Strong Purpose. Colonel Win Kirkland and Sheriff Sarah Pitt are recently married and looking to add to their family, but when a network of dangerous people decide to use McCrumb County as home base, Win and Sarah must spring into action to take them down.   A Secret to Tell by Ann Roberts Goldie Winner and Lambda Literary finalist Ann Roberts is back with her sixth book in the popular Ari Adams mystery series. When an attorney who is the keeper of many secrets ends up murdered, real estate agent Ari Adams and her girlfriend P.I. Molly Nelson start investigating in their own ways. There are five women in town who have a lot to hide, and will Molly and Ari be able to get to the bottom of the murder before becoming targets themselves?   Homecoming by Celeste Castro This is Celeste Castro’s debut novel with Bella! Bestselling author Dusty Del Carmen is invited to speak at a conference in her old home state of Idaho, a place fraught with many unpleasant memories. Enter Professor Morgan West, a fan of Dusty’s and her unexpected companion when the two women become trapped in a rustic cabin together. Perhaps Morgan can find a way to help Dusty finally face the pain of her past.   May 2017   Nico and Tucker by Rachel Gold In this sequel to Gold’s Just Girls, Jess Tucker is back and trying to heal from the wounds of the last year’s trauma. Nico is going through a crisis of their own, as a medical situation becomes impossible to ignore alongside pressure from their family. When Tucker and Nico get close, will Tucker be able to deal with her feelings, or will the familiar urge to run away take over?   Sawmill Springs by Gerri Hill Gerri Hill is back with a new mystery! Homicide detective Mandi Murphy thought she was getting away from her stressful life as a Houston cop by taking up in the peaceful and quaint Sawmill Springs. Same for FBI agent Kayla Dixon who took a job offer from her police chief father and hoped for a quieter life. Everything was going great until a prominent citizen of the sleepy town is murdered. Now Mandi and Kayla will have to team up to find a killer and deal with their growing attraction for one another in the process.   Choosing Love by MB Panichi Lesbian novelist/newspaper editor Amry Marasich is visiting her hometown of Northern Minnesota when she meets forestry officer Takoda Running Bear. The women are instantly drawn to one another, but Amry’s homophobic family makes it hard for her to want to return to this small town for good. Can their love survive the obstacles of intolerance and distance?   The Winder Path by Lyn Dowland Veterinarian Gillian Pembury finds refuge in a small town in Northern England. She’d all but given up hope of a social life when farmwoman Sandi Helton came in with her life displaying an intoxicating mix of strength and compassion. Danger lurks however, threatening to derail this passionate romance.   June 2017   Five Moons Rising by Lise MacTague Humanity is unaware of the secret world of supernatural creatures that live among them, and a special force of genetically engineered hunters makes sure it stays that way. When hunter Hunter Mary Alice Nolan and werewolf Ruri Samson- sworn enemies- come face to face, the unexpected happens.   Water’s Edge by Genevieve Fortin This historical romance takes readers back to the late 1800s, where Emilie Levesque and Angeline Fournier forge a bond while working together in a textile mill. That bond is what keeps them strong under the back breaking conditions of the mill, and the oppressive expectations of women during that time. The women are eventually separated but fate will bring them together once again.   Taken In by Erica Abbott CJ St. Clair thought she left the past behind her when she left Savannah for Colorado. However, CJ is forced to return to her hometown and try to solve a murder case and keep her family together at the same time. CJ’s partner Alex is also dealing with the fallout from a murder, but one that happened many years ago. Can CJ and Alex find a way through this together?   July 2017 Conference Call by various This short story anthology by twenty-eight Bella authors features stories of women who find themselves immersed in drama, romance and intrigue, all the while attending their favorite cons, conferences and events.  Conference Callis an anthology to benefit the Golden Crown Literary Society.   Moment of Weakness by KG MacGregor  After receiving an award for valor, and a career ending injury, Captain Suzann “Zann” Redeker heads back home from Afghanistan to Vermont. What Zann discovers something disturbing about the day she was injured and lost one of her team, her whole world is turned upside down. Will her partner Marleigh stand by her?   No More Pretending by Bette Hawkins  Actress Lauren Langham has her hands full with her biggest role to date — pretending to be straight. When she travels to small town Texas to shoot a new film, she meets Harper Ward and is instantly smitten. Harper mistakes Lauren’s attraction for arrogance, and when she’s hired as the director’s assistant, the two women find themselves butting heads and making sparks.   Skin in the Game by Melissa Price  In this sequel to 2015’s Steel Eyes, super spy Kenna Waverly is back and living quietly in Jamaica. She’s called back into service to help find the people behind a hack into America’s cyber security. She’s put together with a woman named Alice, who Kenna shares a past with. Along the way as they play this dangerous game, Kenna learns more about what happened to her parents, while putting her own life on the line.   In Her Eyes by Renee J. Lukas The sequel to the best-selling Hurricane Days is finally here! Rock star Adrienne Austen is ready to open up about her relationship with former Governor Robin Sanders. Since then, Robin has gone into hiding while Adrienne continues her rise to the top. But where is Robin? Was “bad girl” Adrienne involved in her disappearance?   August 2017   Fire Dancer by Micheala Lynn Having grown up sheltered, Sarah has only just begun discovering her true self. Totally uninterested in the men her family has been trying to set her up with, Sarah finds her interested piqued by a fire dancer named Jewel Black, or to her audiences, Enigma.   Visiting Hours by Tagan Shepard In Tagan Shepard’s Bella debut, we meet history professor Alison Reynolds, who has it all pretty much figured out…or so she thinks. That’s until West Coast doctor Jess comes careening into her life. At first they clash, but under all that irritation lies a pesky attraction that won’t seem to go away.   Pixie by D Jordan Redhawk This new novel by D Jordan Redhawk deals with the events started by her previous protagonist, Darkstone. With the veil between our dimension of the mystical realm finally pierced, humankind is dealing with all kinds of unexpected consequences. When Gillie flees from England and ends up in Portland, she meets Lindsay, a beautiful and kind woman with a shock of blue hair. However, falling for someone is hard enough when you aren’t being chased down by mystical creatures across an ocean.   Echo Point by Virginian Hale Another Bella debut! After the sudden death of her sister, Libby, a grieving Bron comes back to Australia to take care of her young niece, Annie. When Libby’s best friend Ally comes in to the picture, Bron can’t help but bristle at Ally’s sudden presence in her family’s life. Just when Bron thinks of taking Annie back with her to Boston, a wild fire begins raging nearby and Bron realizes just how important Ally might be to her after all.   September  2017 A Time to Speak by Riley Scott In Riley Scott’s newest, closeted Amelia Brandt’s best friend and sometimes lover is murdered in their small Texas town, and Amelia’s world is sent spinning. When LGBTQ activist Dominique Velez arrives in town to help with the healing process, Amelia is drawn to Dominique’s passion and charm. Will this stranger help Amelia finally come out and embrace herself?   Illegal Contact by Becky Harmon When security agent Jamison Krews is asked by a longtime friend to protect her little sister and Tallahassee Tigers star player, Shea Carter, Jamison can’t say no. Can Jamison earn the quarterback’s trust (and maybe more) while protecting her from people who don’t want Shea or the Tigers to succeed?   Chain Letter by Claire McNab The ninth book in the Carol Ashton series is back by popular demand. In this novel, Detective Carol Ashton is investigating the murder of a fellow officer, and finds a link to other unsolved homicides: a threatening chain letter.   A Fugitive’s Kiss by Jaime Clevenger When Aysha’s discovers a mysterious fugitive named Darin taking cover in her barn, the women’s first meeting is less than ideal. However, when Aysha is also threatened by the people after Darin, they must flee and learn to work together to defeat their pursuers.   October 2017 Turbulence by E.J. Noyes Stockbroker Isabelle Rhodes is trying to get over a broken heart, and has her first ever one-night stand. The night was amazing, but the last thing she expected the morning after was for the woman to be the new company pilot, Audrey Graham. Isabelle is determined to keep it professional, but with someone as fun and alluring as Audrey, it won’t be easy.   Vagabond Heart by Ann Roberts Contractor Quinn O’Sullivan doesn’t stay in one place too long, so when a request arrives from her recently deceased travel writer aunt, she hits Route 66 to carry out her wishes. When an injury threatens to derail the adventure, emergency room doctor Suda Singh offers to accompany Quinn on the road. A mystery woman, a couple of cats, and falling in love just might be on the map.   Bait and Switch by Blythe H. Warren When marine biologist Liv Cucinelli comes face to face with the homophobic woman who ruined her college career, she’s less than thrilled to spend an evening with her. Mira Butler has no clue of the havoc she wreaked on on Liv’s life, so when she see has a chance meeting with her, she won’t let Liv walk away. The two women will uncover their shared past, and with some forgiveness and understanding, perhaps they can find a way to be friends…or maybe even more.   Past Due and Set Up by Claire McNab Follow the investigations and adventures of Detective Carol Ashton in the newly reissued books ten and eleven of the beloved mystery series. The murder of a reproductive specialist and the hunt for a hired killer take center stage in these novels.   November 2017   The Secret Pond by Gerri Hill In this new novel by bestselling author Gerri Hill, two grieving widows find a connection with each other. After losing her family, Lindsey McDermott moves to her grandparents’ home in small town Texas to deal with her survivor’s guilt. After Hannah Larson’s husband dies, she too moves to the same Texas town. Her son Jack bonds with Lindsey, and even after he returns to school in the fall, Lindsey continues to come by and their friendship grows deeper than either of them expected.   My Forever Hero by Karen Legasy Debut author Karen Legasy transports readers to Australia with Canadian police officer Marlee Nevin. After a surfing accident nearly takes her life, Marlee is rescued by the captivating Abigail Taylor. Soon after, Abigail is framed with tampering with research at her biosystems firm, and asks Marlee to help her. Can Marlee return the favor and save Abigail this time, even as their attraction smolders beneath the surface?   The Schuyler House by Cade Haddock Strong Another Bella debut! Mattie Pearson has a big secret that she’s kept from everyone. That includes Alex Holland, a friend who Mattie longs for something more with. As Mattie’s past deeds eat away at her, she struggles with the decision to tell Alex the truth. Will her honesty cause her to lose the woman she’s falling in love with?   Under Suspicion, Death Club, and Accidental Murder by Claire McNab     Here are three more Carol Ashton re-releases by Claire McNab. We are rereleasing the entire Carol Ashton series in eBook format, and you can read books 1-14 now.   December 2017   Dreams Unspoken by RJ Layer  Cowgirl, take me away! Horse trainer Jo Marchal has returned to her Ohio hometown to try and reconnect with her family, and do a little healing herself. While there, she meets Maria West, a woman who dreams of love and family. Could these two women find what’s been missing in their lives, in each other?   Heartsick by Tracey Richardson In Richardson’s new medical drama, paramedic Angie Cullen and ER doctor Victoria Turner find out that their respective partners have been cheating…with each other. Brokenhearted at the betrayal, Angie and Victoria become unlikely allies and lean on each other. Can these women learn to trust each other enough to fall?   Lethal Care by Claire McNab with Katherine V. Forrest The long awaited conclusion of the Carol Ashton series is finally here. Detective Inspector Carol Ashton has been promoted to Chief Inspector, and finds herself in charge of two massive cases. The death of wealthy philanthropist Greta Denby and investigating officer Inspector Ian Rooke seem to be connected, and it’s up to Carol Ashton to find the links. If anyone can do it, she can.   All of these books and more are available on bellabooks.com. http://dlvr.it/Q8Dd7q

[daleisgreat]

2016-17 TV Season Recap Part Four: Bonus Summer TV Edition

Previous TV Season Recaps – (2013-14 | 2014-15 | 2015-16 2016-17 TV Season Recap, Part 1 (Gotham, Arrow, Flash, Legends of Tomorrow) 2016-17 TV Season Recap, Part 2 (Luke Cage, Iron Fist, Legion, Riverdale) 2016-17 TV Season Recap, Part 3 (24: Legacy, South Park, Horace & Pete, Stranger Things)

I did not anticipate there being so many new shows to keep up with this summer, and the last summer shows just wrapped up over the last few weeks in time for season premieres of the shows I am currently following. When I reflected back on the summer, there ended up being six seasons of shows I wound up devouring throughout the summer, and it felt like plenty to warrant a quick blog with my thoughts of the summer of television. A few of these shows I covered in prior TV Season recaps, but their premieres got pushed back a few months to the summertime instead of their usual spring debuts, and a few other shows caught my eye too, so let’s get to it! Glow - For those unfamiliar with GLOW (Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling) it was a edgy women's wrestling league that ran from 1985-90. The Netflix series focuses on a new cast of fictional characters with some based on personas of the former wrestler's in the promotion. Glow centers on one Ruth Wilder (Alison Brie) who has been looking to catch her first break in Hollywood and took up a role in GLOW because it was the only thing available. The 10 episode season introduces the cast of the dozen or wrestlers and builds up to the season finale which is the shooting of the pilot episode. Obviously, the wrestling nut in me is really biased on this, but I feel safe in saying it is a legit good show and you do not need to be a wrestling fan to dig it. Only about 30% of the show deals with wrestling while the rest is fleshing out the rest of the cast. Wrestling fans will dig a few cameos from former WWE/Impact stars peppered throughout the show. The episodes are roughly a half hour each and with only 10 episodes it made for a quick and entertaining watch. Grade: B+

Defenders - This is the equivalent to the Netflix Marvel Universe to what the first Avengers was to the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Defenders is the team-up show of the four heroes introduced in past Netflix Marvel shows over the last few years featuring Daredevil (Charlie Cox), Jessica Jones (Krysten Ritter), Luke Cage (Mike Colter) and Iron Fist (Finn Jones). I loved seeing Daredevil, Jones and Cage back again and kicking ass, especially once they all start teaming up in the back half of the show. Another positive is this season is only eight episodes compared to the usual 13 of previous Marvel Netflix series so there is a lot less fluff. On the negative however, Defenders doubles down on nearly everything I loathed on the Iron Fist show. I am not a fan of the villains known as ‘The Hand’ at all as they come off as meaningless cannon-fodder, but Marvel went all in on them this season by unleashing Elektra (Elodie Yung) as their leader. She kind of gives The Hand a smidge of an edge, but I was never much of a fan of Elektra either so that did not really help. Like most of the Internet, I was not big into Iron Fist also and it is unfortunate that Iron Fist is the primary focus of the four heroes in most episodes as he plays a pivotal role in trying to vanquish The Hand. By the end of the show I still was not swayed to be a fan of either Iron Fist or buying into The Hand as a formidable antagonist, but at least I can take solace in enjoying how Daredevil, Cage and Jones all played off each other along with each show’s periphery characters in each episode so the season was not a complete waste. Grade: C-

‎American Grit - The first season of American Grit was a guilty pleasure of mine and I am glad it returned along with host John Cena for a second season. It is a Survivor-esque reality show where a bunch of people are divided into four teams in a military themed camp with a former military veteran as their leader and compete in challenges each week that leads to someone going home each week until there is one left to win a million dollars. This season mixes things up a bit by having a 50/50 mix of contestants consisting of athletic builds and everyday Joes/Janes and all have a theme of trying to find their grit. That means a part of each show features a little bit of everyday drama of the competitors having a big personal moment revealing their past personal struggles and why they entered the show. There is also a little bit more of a focus on the team leaders this season too and watching their turmoil bubble over throughout the season resulted in some entertaining animosity. I usually try and avoid most reality TV but naturally I made an exception for this show because it involves the charismatic beast that is John Cena and I got a kick whenever he appeared to shed some wisdom to the entrants or gossip with the military veterans. The challenges are also fun to watch for the most part and consist of a unique boot camp style variant so I was always looking forward to what challenge they cooked up each episode. The ‘finding your Grit’ theme resulted in several emotional moments throughout the show of the cast spilling their guts about their past and for a handful it looked like they legitimately came out of the show changed and finding out something new about themselves. Grade: A-

Ballers - The Rock continues to impress as sports financial manager extraordinaire Spencer Strasmore. I always relate Ballers as a sports-themed version of Entourage for those not familiar with it. The theme of this season is Spencer’s agency trying to expand and make it big by landing a deal to be the owner group in charge of moving an NFL team to Las Vegas. Rock continues to play off well with coworker Joe (Rob Corddry) as the two continue to party way too hard to impress potential clients. I also dig the athletes on this show as they face popular NFL controversies such as dealing with concussions and suspensions over failed drug tests. I will also give a shoutout to the Dolphins scout, Charles (Omar Miller) and Dolphins GM Larry Siefert (Dule Hill) as I have always dug their love/hate dynamic and they continue to steal the show with a few unforgettable scenes including a dinner scene that goes all kinds of wrong just like the average WWE wedding. There are a couple clunker episodes, but for the most part this was another must-see season. Grade: A- Leftovers - I have no idea where to begin on this show that deals with living in the aftermath of the Rapture. The first season had a little bit of a standard plot structure, but last season and for this final third season, The Leftovers went off the rails in all kinds of unpredictable ways where I stopped trying to guess what happened and went along for the ride. The primary plot point for this episode is the cast worrying about a second, far greater Rapture occurring and the cast going to insurmountable lengths to prevent it. Some of those lengths feature crafting a new version of the Bible, the wildest boat ride in TV history and finally getting the payoff to what happened to the 2% of the population that vanished in the original Rapture.

It is hard to recommend this show as I stopped questioning what they were doing early on in the second season and am just accepting whatever they throw in my face, except for almost anything relating to the Guilty Remnant cult. It appears the writers heard our dissatisfied pleas and the Guilty Remnant are laughably written off early in the season with a throwaway line of dialogue and have a minimal presence this season. I take that back, I do like Guilty Remnant member, Liv Tyler getting her overdue comeuppance this season in a glorious manner. The series finale delivered like few other series finales before it and I will never forget conversing with a friend for nearly a half hour breaking down the entire season in a way I do with no other TV shows. Grade: A+ Game of Thrones - After many brief teases and minor skirmishes this is finally the season of Game of Thrones that goes all in on white walkers/zombies. It is impossible for me to give this show a fair breakdown in just a paragraph or two because it has such a huge cast and I am awful at remembering almost of all their names. I will say I liked the setup to capture a living white walker and bring it to Castle Black. Those two episodes really stood out the most where Jon Snow and his motley crew put their lives on the lines into the icy wastes to capture a white walker. The confrontation with the walkers surrounding Jon Snow on that island lead to him and his men laying it all on the line in a EPIC showdown that had me buying into their fates until an unexpected ex-machina transpires and had me popping huge at the TV.

I loved how Game of Thrones built up the big negotiation session between Snow and the Lannisters as a dramatic TV event for the ages and that episode delivered in a big way with meaningful payoffs. I do echo what a majority of the online feedback that the pace of travel is amped up far too fast compared to previous seasons. I recall prior seasons where certain characters spent an entire season getting from one location to another, but in this shortened season characters would leave one location, appear on another side of the world later that episode and make it back to their home region by the end of the same episode. I get it, the show is winding down with one more season to go so they need to fast track some of these story arcs, but after setting a precedent for the five prior seasons it is difficult to make that adjustment. There is still so much more I want to touch on including Arya being a badass assassin, dragons, zombie dragons, that grayscale-sickness seeming to be a little too convenient to cure, the awesomeness of Hot Pie and the cowardice of Theon, but I am already pushing 2000 words here and need to wrap this up. Suffice it to say, Game of Thrones continues to amaze, and I am gratified that I am finally caught up and cannot wait for the final season next year. Grade: A Past TV/Web Series Blogs 2013-14 TV Season Recap 2014-15 TV Season Recap 2015-16 TV Season Recap 2016-17 TV Season Recap Adventures of Briscoe County Jr: The Complete Series Angry Videogame Nerd Volumes 7-9 Mortal Kombat: Legacy - Season 1 OJ: Made in America: 30 for 30 RedvsBlue - Seasons 1-13 Roseanne – Seasons 1-9 Seinfeld Final Season Superheroes: A Never-Ending Battle Superheroes: Pioneers of Television