#and then I heard the opening and was like. wait. ik this song.

[honeyvenommusic]

.

[joelscruff]

feelings on fire (joel miller x f!reader) 18+ PART TEN

masterlist | kofi | notifs | *spongebob narrator voice* 4 months later. well, i'm not gonna bore you all with excuses, god knows most of you have heard what's been goin' on with me at this point lmao. but yall have been so patient and lovely and i really really appreciate it. i hope you enjoy this chapter; it's a little bit of bliss before things get... interesting. there's still more to come (about four chapters or so) and i'll try to update much sooner next time but please remember i'm only one person & i write this for fun (and for free) in my spare time!!! ik it can be frustrating when there are long periods between updates but i'm trying my best, please know that. k love u bye 💕 chapter summary: you & joel enjoy your little weekend getaway, far from the prying eyes and ears of your parents. rating: 18+ explicit warnings: age gap (reader is early 20s, joel is mid 50s), unprotected p in v sex, creampies, dirty talk, praise kink, size kink (joel has a big dick), tummy bulge, deepthroating (or...attempted deepthroating), cum swallowing, fingering, pussy kisses, ridiculous amounts of fluff, namedropping one of my fav songs of all time because i can, the tiniest mention of sexual assault (aka noah) word count: 12.9k ao3

You think you might finally understand what it means to experience happiness.

Not the feelings you've faked for most of your life, not the plastered-on smiles and faux giggles, autopilot prayers and forced gratitude. No - real happiness. That tingling sensation of nothing but pure bliss, safety, love, and peace, something that's felt far out of your reach for most of your life. It swells in your chest, makes a home in your heart as you nuzzle into fluffy pillows, warm bedsheets, and feel yourself drift in and out of consciousness, completely and utterly relaxed. Happy, you can't help but think to yourself, I'm so happy.

You're aware of Joel's presence, fading in and out here and there as he wipes a damp cloth between your legs, across your stomach, down your thighs - taking care of you, making sure you're comfortable. Afterward he cuddles in behind you and wraps his arms around your middle, buries his face in the back of your neck and inhales deeply; you wonder if he's feeling the exact same way you are right now - god, you hope he is.

"That felt so good," you murmur to him softly, eyes still closed, "Felt so good, Joel."

He kisses your neck, holds you tighter in his embrace, "I know, babygirl."

"Can still feel you inside me," you breathe, "It's like you're still there."

He chuckles softly, "Not to burst your bubble but that's probably cum. Couldn't get all of it with the cloth." The words that should be dirty - should seem shameful - do nothing but send a warm tingle down your spine, a sleepy smile to your face. You know he's right - you can still feel something warm deep inside you, a slow trickle making its way to your opening, but there's something else. You're still pulsing every so often around the phantom of a shape, an echo of what was still there only a few moments ago.

"It's not just that," you shuffle in the sheets, nuzzling your face further into the pillow, "it's like... like you're still in there, spreading me open."

He groans and his grip around you tightens, fingertips pressing into the malleable softness of your belly. He leans down to press a small kiss to your ear, "Can't just say stuff like that, angel. Gonna get me hard again." You shiver.

"Good," you whisper, "'Cause I want you to do it again."

His legs tangle with yours under the sheets as he pulls you in, scruff nuzzling against the bare skin of your shoulder, "We'll wait a little bit," he murmurs, "You're gonna start feelin' a little sore soon, if you don't already."

"I don't," you breathe, and you mean it. "Doesn't hurt at all, really. It... it didn't hurt. I always thought it would hurt."

You can almost feel his frown against your skin, "S'not supposed to hurt," he murmurs, "Woulda stopped if you'd been in any pain."

You smile, "I know you would've."

He hums into your hair, strokes his hand down along your arm, "S'good," he mumbles, and you're suddenly aware of the heaviness in his voice, the way his lips wrap lazily around the words.

"Are you sleepy?" you ask softly.

"Yeah, baby," he breathes, "M'sleepy."

You smile at the adorable admission, then lean back into his embrace and settle in. The sun is starting to go down, casting the room in long orange and blue shadows, warm and comforting. Your eyes close again and you focus on that blissful feeling, on the weight of Joel's naked body behind you holding you close, the sound of his breathing, his smell. On the fact that you've never felt more safe in your entire life.

"I'm so glad it was you," you whisper, and you don't mind if he's already fallen asleep.

--

You're not sure how long you both nap, but you wake up soon after to a completely dark hotel room, save for the flickering lights from the traffic below and the warm glow of the buildings outside the window. Your eyes flutter for a few seconds as your brain reconnects you to the present, and you're suddenly very aware of a dull ache in your groin, an unpleasant throb that hadn't been there earlier.

"Ow," you mumble incoherently, reaching blindly for the blankets and pulling them back to peer down at yourself, but the room is so dark that it's difficult to see anything properly, "Ow."

"S'wrong?" you hear Joel mumble beside you, stirring from his own slumber.

You wince in embarrassment, shaking your head, "It's nothing, go back to sleep."

"Y'said 'ow'," you feel him sit up and reach over to turn on the lamp, "You okay?"

As soon as the lamplight floods the room your eyes cast downward, half expecting to see some medical emergency, some horrific reason for the vacation to end early, to ruin everything before it's barely even started - but thankfully it's none of those things. You're just a little swollen - puffier than usual - and aching, but not in a good way. You bring your hand down and cup yourself gently, hissing a bit when your fingers brush against your opening; it feels almost like a bruise.

"Oh, honey," Joel murmurs, and you turn your head to see his brows furrowing in concern, "Y'sore?"

You wince, biting your lip, "Um, a little."

He frowns and pulls his own side of the blankets back, and you can't help the warmth that floods your cheeks when you see his exposed body; the dark hair wisping across his tan skin, his soft belly and strong thighs - and his cock, soft and heavy and impossible not to look at. You've seen him naked several times at this point but every time still somehow feels like the first, like it's brand new. You watch as he crawls downward and gently places his hand on top of yours.

"Lemme see," he murmurs softly, and you allow him to pull your hand back, exposing your sore pussy to him. His brow furrows, "Aw baby, you're all swollen."

"Is that normal?"

He nods, eyes still trailing up and down, "It's normal," he assures you, "It's probably worse 'cause - well," he smiles sheepishly, peering up at you.

"'Cause you're so big," you finish for him, your own lips turning up into a smirk, and he chuckles.

"Yeah, that." You watch as he brings his hands down and very carefully thumbs your outer lips, pulls them apart to assess what's inside. He groans, and you're about to ask what's wrong when you see a thin stream of his cum dribble out onto the sheets below.

"Fuck," you both whisper at the same time, and when your eyes meet you can see that his are suddenly dark, glassy. You feel yourself begin to throb beneath his touch.

"Still full o'me," he murmurs, eyes trailing back down to where you're dripping, "Messy girl."

Your own eyes go hooded as you watch him lean down and press a small kiss to your clit; your hips buck up, a whimper slipping past your lips as his whiskers prickle deliciously against your sensitive skin. He smiles against you, kisses your clit again and darts his tongue out to taste, just for a moment. You whine.

"I know what you need, babygirl" he whispers, nosing your mound and closing his eyes, "I know what'll help."

Your mind races with possibilities. "Wh-what?"

He suddenly pulls back, crooked smile lighting up his beautiful face, "A bath. It'll help with the soreness." Oh. He presses another kiss to your clit, "If I can bring myself to stop kissin' this perfect pussy."

You giggle softly and he opens his eyes to look up at you again, smiling tenderly. He reluctantly pulls himself off you and climbs off the bed, reaching down to grab his discarded underwear from the floor. "I'll start runnin' the water," he tells you softly, pulling them on and taking a step forward to brush your hair out of your face, "You just relax, sweet girl. Don't move a muscle."

The bath is warm and inviting, lit candles lining the counter and floor and dousing the room in a warm glow; it's hard to believe only a few hours earlier you were on the verge of a panic attack on these very tiles. Now you lean back against the cool rim of the claw foot tub, eyes closed as you submerge yourself in the hot water. There's no panic or anxiety in your body anymore, just warmth and comfort and the welcome ache in your groin, the smell of vanilla in your nose.

"Good temp?" Joel asks softly nearby, and you hear his hand breach the surface of the water, testing the heat. You smile.

"Perfect," you breathe, eyes still closed, "Thank you."

His hand brushes lightly against yours under the water and he squeezes it gently, then murmurs, "I'll give you some privacy."

Your eyes snap open, "No," you cradle his hand in both of yours as your brows furrow, "Stay."

A smile breaks across his face, charming and boyish as he seats himself down next to the bathtub with barely any hesitation, like he'd been hoping you'd say that. He keeps hold of your hand beneath the water and tilts his face toward yours - you press your forehead against his and breathe a long sigh of relief.

"Feelin' okay?" he murmurs, "Emotionally?"

You nod, sighing contentedly, "More than okay," you whisper, "I... I still can't believe it actually happened." Your lips twitch upward and you press a soft kiss to his cheek, closing your eyes, "Thank you."

He squeezes your hand again beneath the water before pulling out and bringing it upwards to cradle your face, tilting your head to look at him. His eyes are still a bit sleepy, hair sticking up in all directions and that beautiful smile still lighting up his face as he thumbs your cheek.

"I should be thankin' you," he breathes, "For trustin' me like that, bein' so vulnerable with me." He leans in to kiss you tenderly, but his words send a sudden flutter of insecurity through your body and you pull back to look at him again, unsure.

"Was I... was I good at it?" you ask quietly, "Did I do okay?"

"Oh, angel," he murmurs, bringing his other hand up to cup both your cheeks and brush his nose gently against yours, "You did so good. So, so, so good."

He ends up washing your hair, a small but significant gesture that makes the feelings from earlier bubble up again, the warm fondness and tenderness and love. You lean back in the tub, eyes closed, lost in the sensations of his big hands deftly applying the shampoo and conditioner, massaging it into your scalp and making your eyes roll back. It's ridiculous how even this makes you throb beneath the surface, the ache dissipating a bit in the hot water. So much so that when he caps the conditioner and rinses your hair once again, you reach up to take his hand and squeeze, eyes still shut.

"Touch me," you whisper, voice already desperate, "Please."

He doesn't need any convincing, inching toward the side of the tub and reaching inside to cup your pussy in his big hand again, softly rubbing your clit. You whimper and tremble, gripping the edge of the tub for support and whining when he speeds up, circling and rubbing it exactly how you like it.

"Poor little pussy," you hear him murmur, "Just needs some relief after gettin' fucked like that, doesn't she baby?"

"Mmhmm," you manage to hum, squeezing the sides of the tub and nodding furiously, "Y-yeah."

"Took so much cock in this little hole," he whispers, and that's enough to send you over the edge, eyes snapping open as you shake and shiver in the hot water. You see him sitting there, smiling at you with a devious glint in his eyes. He knows exactly the effect he has on you.

--

"What do we do now?" you ask him softly from the couch a little while later, carefully scrunching a towel in your hair and watching as he changes the bedsheets upon your request - you'd felt a bit embarrassed asking, but you'd really rather not sleep in a wet spot. He'd been more than gracious in honoring your request.

It's late, but the nap and the bath have left you feeling wide awake, and you have to admit that you're feeling a bit hungry too despite the full meal earlier. Does sex make you hungry? You file it as a question to ask Tasha.

"Whatever you wanna do, darlin'," he says with a smile, turning down the sheets and gesturing for you to join him in bed again, "C'mere."

You give your hair one last squeeze and pad over to the bed, clad in Joel's Grateful Dead shirt from earlier today. You don't care in the slightest that it's not necessarily the cleanest article of clothing to be wearing after a bath - it smells like him, feels like him. You just can't get enough of him.

Insatiable.

You both climb back into bed and he pulls you in immediately, tugging you close and wrapping his big arms around you. You lean back into him and feel yourself grinning without even really thinking about it, eyes closing as you focus on the feeling of his chest moving back and forth against your back with every breath.

"Always look so pretty in my shirts, babygirl," he whispers in your ear, and it sends tingles down your spine, a rush of warmth to your heart. He kisses you gently and you listen as he inhales deeply, nose buried in your damp hair. His hand travels downward and you both watch as he cups your pussy yet again, warm and soft.

"Feelin' a little better?" he asks quietly, thumb trailing gently up and down your outer lips, "Still sore?"

"Better," you reassure him gently - and you mean it; the warm water did help to ease the ache.

He hums and continues to trace your soft lips, nosing your ear and breathing deeply again, and fuck, you could get used to this. This casual intimacy, being touched without any expectations, any fear or anxiety. Feeling safe and wanted and cared for in his embrace, no worrying about getting home early, no time limit looming. Just you and him.

I love you, you want to whisper.

Your stomach growls.

He removes his hand almost immediately. "Room service," he says with a chuckle, and your eyes snap open again as he reaches over and grabs the menu on the nightstand, placing it in front of you both, "Pick your poison."

Your eyes are drawn almost immediately to the dessert section, followed by a short wave of guilt. You're craving something sweet, but you can't help but think back to being a kid again, asking for treats and being denied, feeling as if your desires were unimportant, childish, silly.

But no, you're not that scared kid anymore. You're not. You won't be.

You bite your lip, "You know what I could really go for right now?"

"What?"

"It's silly, but-"

"It ain't silly, babygirl," he murmurs, and his big hand travels down to squeeze your thigh gently, a comforting gesture, "Whatever it is, it ain't silly."

Less than a minute later he's on the phone with room service, ordering you a hot fudge sundae.

You spend the rest of the night nestled in the warmth of your hotel bed, flicking between channels, legs tangled together beneath the sheets as you take turns scooping heaping spoons of ice cream back and forth. Your mouth and fingertips are sticky, chocolate lining your lips, dribbles of melted vanilla dolloped on your chin which Joel wastes no time in delicately lapping up with his tongue.

"God, you're so fuckin' sweet," he whispers to you, kisses you softly, darts his tongue out to taste again. You hum against his lips and try to keep your emotions at bay; he tastes like chocolate and vanilla and safety.

--

Waking up is different with the morning sun shining brightly through the hotel windows, but that's not the only thing that's different; you notice as your eyes flutter open that the ache in your groin is gone, replaced by a growing hunger and arousal in the pit of your stomach.

Oh, wow.

Joel's arms are around you, wrapped strong and solid, and when you turn within them and see him sleeping next to you, the hunger only grows. God, he's so handsome like this - the grey in his hair sparkling in the early light, jaw soft and lax with sleep, cheeks flushed. Almost angelic in his own way, gentle and peaceful.

Until his eyelashes begin to flutter delicately against the streams of sunlight, brow furrowing in sleepy confusion at your sudden movement; he's awake.

The desire in your belly burns.

"You look so cute," you whisper without even really thinking about it, and his eyelashes halt their fluttering to give you another look of confusion.

"Cute's not exactly a word I'd use to describe myself," he mumbles, voice thick with sleep, "S'all you."

"Well, I would," you reply with a smile, watching as he closes his eyes again and nestles his face into the pillow. You reach forward to gently thumb one of the lines at the corner of his mouth, deep-set and soft beneath your touch. His eyelids twitch but he doesn't open them, "You're so soft too," you admit quietly.

"Again," he breathes, lips turning up slightly into a sleepy smile, "Not a word I'd use."

"Cute and soft," you repeat, thumb moving downward to trace the shape of his bottom lip, "And mine."

He chuckles under his breath, face smooshing a little more into the pillow, "M'yours," he murmurs, "all yours."

All yours.

You lean in even closer and inhale deeply, nose trailing up and down along his temple. Your eyes almost roll back at the scent of him, the masculine and heady aroma of his sweat alighting your senses. You're wide awake now, pussy throbbing somewhere below as you press a kiss to the apple of his cheek, tongue darting out to taste his skin.

His eyes open halfway, eyebrow raising as he sleepily watches you work your mouth up and down the side of his face, breath coming quicker and more frantic as your legs wind around him under the sheets. Obliging your desperation, his big arms tighten around you and he rolls the both of you, allowing you to settle on top of his large, warm body.

You stare down at him, hunger clear in your eyes.

"You were inside me," you whisper.

His mouth turns up at the corners, "I was."

"It felt really good."

"It did."

You lean your face down to trace your nose along his cheekbone again, eyes hooded, voice needy.

"I want you to be inside me again."

He peers up at you, sleepiness already fading from his expression as he watches yours with mirrored desire, "Yeah? You want me to be inside you right now?"

You nod, "Yes, please."

"Then turn over on your side, angel."

A little confused but certainly not opposed, you do as he says, rolling back over onto your side and resting your head softly against your pillow. You feel his hand dip downwards beneath the sheets, then his fingertips glide smoothly along your abdomen. Your heart hammers in your chest when he lifts up your - or rather, his - shirt and thumbs your tummy gently.

"Are y'still sore?" he murmurs, "How d'you feel?"

"M'wet, Joel," you whimper, grinding back against the blankets and trying to feel him, "M'really wet."

"Lemme feel," he breathes, hand trailing downward even further. His fingers dip into your soft, soaked centre and a low groan rumbles in his throat, "Oh babygirl, so wet for me."

"Put it in," you whimper, not caring how pathetic and needy you probably sound, "Please, Joel, put it in me again."

"Christ," you hear him mutter, arousal burning in his voice, "Okay baby, hold still, I'll put it in. I'll make you feel better."

Seconds later you feel the heat of his tip crowding the space at your entrance, already wet and sticky. A soft moan falls from your throat at the sensation, eyes closing as you feel Joel's hand cup your leg and pull it upwards, holding you open. He hooks it in the crook of his arm, shuffling forward a bit and pushing the head of his cock inside your heat.

"Oh, fuck," you whine, head falling backwards. You feel his nose in your hair again, feel the stretch of your pussy and the widening of your thighs as he pulls your leg up even more.

"Yeah, there you go," he murmurs, pushing inside further. He goes slow, takes his time, until he's fully sheathed inside of you and your eyes are rolling back on their own accord, quiet whimpers tumbling past your lips. "Yeah, look at you takin' that cock."

As if by muscle memory your hand reaches downwards to cup the protruding shape of him at the bottom of your tummy, a low whine in your throat. He's so big inside you, nestled perfectly within the deepest parts of your body just like he'd been last night, large and warm.

"Feels so good," you manage to gasp out, other hand clenching into a fist against your pillow, "So good, so good." It's almost a mantra, voice breathless as you squish your face against the cotton and push back almost lazily against him, his balls settling heavy and warm at the base of your ass. You can feel every twitch of his shaft, the way the tip pulses against that special spot within.

"Yeah, you like bein' full like that, don't you baby?" he murmurs, "Don't even need me to move, do you? Just like feelin' it in there, huh?"

And you almost hate how right he is, how just the sensation of being so full of him already has you on the edge of an orgasm without any stimulation. Because you want more, you want what he gave you last night, want him to fuck you even firmer, deeper, without holding back. You want it to last hours.

But you know it's too much before he even starts to move, that familiar ache in your groin returning as your walls constrict around the long shape of him. He pulls out slowly, takes his time, pushes back in at a snail's pace. You feel a tickling sensation against your clit, his pubic hair pressing deliciously against the wet skin as he fills you - and without any warning, you start to come.

"Fuckfuckfuck," you cry out into the sunlit hotel room, trembling in his arms, legs shaking. You can tell in his body language behind you that he's taken aback by your sudden release, hand suddenly dropping from your calf so he can palm your sternum and pull you against him.

"Oh, honey," he groans, simultaneously tender and aroused, "Are you comin', baby? You comin' just from bein' stuffed full like that?"

"Yes," you grit out, voice a high keen as your body shakes and your release stretches out before the both of you in quick spasms, "Yes, I'm sorry."

"Nonono, no sorries," his voice is honey in your ear, fingertips grazing your nipples as he lays his palm flat against your chest, "You're a good girl, angel. You're such a good girl."

You continue to spasm on his cock, legs quivering and pathetic whines tearing from your throat until your orgasm has passed and you're just leaning back into his embrace, eyes closed. You breathe deeply, lashes fluttering when he noses your jaw and presses a soft kiss to the space beneath.

"S'alot for you," he murmurs, "I know it's a lot, babygirl. Don't ever gotta apologize for comin' too fast, not to me."

You hum softly, still extremely aware of his girthy size stretching you out somewhere below. Your eyes open and you peer downwards, brows scrunching in wonder and pleasure when you see where you're joined, where his flesh meets yours. You really are full, the base of his cock barely visible beneath your folds, the pubic hair that had caused your early release still pressed against your outer lips.

"How does it even fit?" you ask softly, almost by accident, but he just chuckles.

"The human body is a hell of a thing," he murmurs, kissing your cheek and pulling you in even closer, shuffling you on his dick just a little bit and making you wince a bit with oversensitivity, "You want me to pull out?"

"No," you shake your head and readjust yourself in his embrace, taking a breath, "No, I want you to keep going."

"Y'sure?"

"I'm sure."

He doesn't need telling twice. Within seconds he's resumed his slow and careful thrusts, almost rhythmic in their presses and pulls, filling you and emptying you in melodic succession. You reach down and take his big hand in yours, squeeze his fingers and let him fuck you like he had last night - tender, soft, comfortable. It almost doesn't feel real; how are you in a hotel room in another city, wrapped up in bed with a man three times your age, his cock buried to the hilt inside your body while you whimper and twitch in his arms? How did you get here?

"Y'know, women are a bit different than men in the orgasm department," Joel says gently behind you, stroking your hand with his thumb, "You might be able to come again if we try."

Your eyebrows go up, "Really?"

"Mmhmm," his hand slips from yours and he reaches it downward to carefully prod one of his fingers against your sensitive clit. You buck in his arms but don't protest, watching as he temporarily halts his slow thrusts to rub you softly. Your eyes go hooded, body melting like jelly in his arms as his his thick fingers slowly begin to work against the already swollen bud.

"Feel good?" he whispers.

"Yes."

He continues his careful circling, presses a kiss to your shoulder and resumes fucking into you. The sounds are pornographic in nature, surrounding your senses and filling the room with the low slap of his hips against your ass and the wet squelch of your juices dripping down his palm. But it somehow doesn't feel dirty or shameful - in fact, it's hard to imagine anything that feels more right than this.

"Joel," you breathe shakily, face twisting against the pillow again, heart pounding.

"I know, feels good doesn't it, babygirl?" he noses your skin and breathes you in, hooks your leg under his arm a bit more and groans softly, "God, you're so fuckin' tight. Such a tight fuckin' pussy."

It's your pussy, you want to breathe, it's yours. I'm yours. But you can barely get any words out as his thrusts pick up speed, as the sounds get louder and his fingers against your clit become firmer in their movements. You can feel yourself teetering on the edge again, the fire in your belly burning hotter than ever as you let him crowd your space as much as possible, let his body push yours further and further until your eyes are rolling back and all you can feel is the steady thrust of his big cock and the girth of his fingers against your pussy.

"I'm coming," you moan out weakly, "M'coming again, Joel."

You don't hear what he says in response, ears muffled as if you're underwater, pleasure spreading throughout your body and hitting you at full force like a hurricane as he fucks you through it. You're barely aware of the sounds you're making, high pitched and almost feral as his hips slap against yours a few more times. And then you feel it, the hot pulses of his cum painting your insides, filling you up as his cock spasms and twitches deep inside.

"Oh, fuck," he groans, voice thick with pleasure and sleep as he buries his face in your hair, hips stuttering, "Fuck. Take it, there you go."

Yeah, you could get used to this.

--

You'd been pretty sure you wouldn't leave the hotel room this weekend, just like you'd told him a few days prior. The thought of staying wrapped up in bedsheets, warm bodies pressed up against each other, sharing soft kisses and quiet whispers and tender looks...it'd be more than enough for an enjoyable getaway.

But it's hot, way hotter than you'd anticipated before arriving - and the pool is calling your name.

Or maybe something else is calling your name.

You stand in the bathroom and stare at your bikini clad form, a smile curving your lips as you assess the thin straps and baby pink frills. To think you'd tried to return this to Joel, briefly refused to wear it. Now you're about to don it in front of a hotel pool full of people like a normal woman, like someone without shame, without guilt, without a mother who'd skin her alive if she saw her wearing it.

Your smile falters.

You'd texted your mother after getting out of bed, apologized once again for missing her calls last night and told her you had a "busy" day at the festival ahead of you, that you'd let her know when you leave tomorrow. All she'd said in response was Ok.

You'd climbed back into bed defeatedly, finding a home against Joel's naked form, "She's mad at me," you'd murmured softly against his bare chest, squished into his side with his heartbeat thrumming in your ear.

"Don't think about her right now," he'd whispered, carding his fingers gently through your hair, "Think about this. How this feels."

He'd peered at you so softly, so full of warmth and affection. Those three words had been on the tip of your tongue again, so close to tumbling past your swollen lips - but you'd held it in.

It hadn't stopped you from texting Tasha though:

we had sex and i love him.

UM!! UMMM!!!! DETAILS????

monday!!! i'll call you

🫡 ok slut just leave me hangin i see how it is. AT LEAST TELL ME HE LIKED THE LINGERIE.

oh he liked it :)

queen shit

"Hi, pretty girl," Joel's voice says suddenly, and you're snapped from your reflection in the mirror to find him leaning against the doorway, clad in a pair of swim trunks and a Bob Dylan t-shirt, "Look at you."

You pose a little bit, hand on your hip, "Think the pool boys will like it?"

He laughs lightly, shaking his head, "I don't doubt it, but they might have some competition." He holds out his hand for you and you take it, stepping forward to let him pull you in close.

"They couldn't hold a candle to you," you whisper honestly, and he kisses your forehead with a smile, thumbing the corner of your mouth.

"Wait 'til you see my breaststroke, that'll really get you goin'."

You snort and slap his arm playfully, "Lead the way, pool boy."

--

Joel may have just been teasing about his swimming ability, but he certainly hadn't been wrong about it getting you going. You watch from the comfort of a lounge chair as he whips back and forth across the broad expanse of the hotel pool like a bullet, kicking off from end to end without much effort at all. His arms are strong and lean, body fast and nimble as the water splashes around his broad form. Every so often his face peeks up from the water and you catch a glimpse of his drenched scruff, the way the greying locks of his hair curl down his forehead into his eyes. God, he's fucking gorgeous.

You're laid out in your bikini just watching, letting him expel some energy before you join him. He'd told you he likes swimming but doesn't get to do it as much as he'd like, what with his work responsibilities. You wonder if he'd ever want to swim in your parent's pool...

You shake the thought away as soon as you think of it. There's no feasible way that could work, no option that wouldn't involve an obscene amount of risk. But still... the thought of watching him from the comfort of your own backyard, just completely alone without any bystanders or hotel guests...

"You gonna join me or what?" Joel suddenly calls from the water, and you blink the thoughts away and throw him a grin. He wades near the shallow end, arms coming up to lean against the concrete edge as he peers at you. "Don't keep me waitin', baby."

You feel your cheeks warm, unable to help but glance back and forth to see if anyone is watching, listening. Everyone else seems to be minding their own business, lost in their own conversations, their own fun. Nobody cares that you're here with him. Nobody cares what you're wearing.

Slipping from the lounge chair, you totter over to the edge where Joel resides and slowly sink down onto the concrete, kicking your legs over the side to seat yourself in front of him.

"God, these legs," he almost groans, immediately taking one in his hands and massaging your calf, your knee, your thigh, "Look at you."

"Stop acting like you haven't seen me naked," you tease, though you still feel a bit shy underneath his gaze as he moves his attention to your other leg.

"Doesn't mean I'm gonna stop admirin' this body," he seems lost in his own movements as he caresses the space behind your knee, "You're so god damn beautiful." His hands suddenly wrap around your waist and without much warning he's carefully pulling you down into the water, moving you in close. On instinct your arms come up to wrap around his neck.

"How the hell am I here with you right now, huh?" he murmurs, leaning down to brush his nose gently against yours, "How're you even real?"

"I could ask you the same thing," you reply a little breathlessly, "I've been asking myself that since we got here."

He slowly turns your bodies in the water, peering down into your eyes like you're the only people here - and you might as well be. You're unable to stop yourself from leaning up to press a kiss to his lips, from letting your tongue dart out to gently explore his mouth; he tastes like toothpaste and chlorine.

"Y'gonna swim with me?" he asks after you've pulled away, pupils blown a bit wider, "Gonna put that little swimsuit to good use?"

"I think I'm putting it to good use right now," you breathe, inching closer so your breasts are pushing against his chest. You're genuinely surprising yourself at your own boldness, especially in such a crowded place - it's almost like you're a different person here, the person you're supposed to be, confidence coursing through your veins. You stand on your tiptoes beneath the water, bringing one of your legs up to wind around his waist.

"Hmm," he hums, and his face is still dripping with water, the wrinkles in his skin peppered with little droplets that make you crazy, "You do have a point there, darlin'."

You lean in again to kiss him, feel a burst of pride in your chest when you see the sudden hunger and arousal in his expression. Just before your lips touch however, you pull back from him and throw yourself into the water, turning back to toss him a cheeky grin.

"Gotta catch me first," you giggle, then speed off in the opposite direction, leaving him standing there with a look of surprise etched on his face - followed quickly by a look of determination.

"Oh, I will," he practically growls, diving into the water in the same manner and reaching out to grab your ankle.

Time passes quickly in the pool, Joel chasing you back and forth, catching you time and time again until you're a giggling mess with tears streaming down your face and his fingers pinching your sides. You can't remember the last time you had this much fun, felt so free and light. You suppose your night out with Tasha had been a fun experience for the most part, until you remember the vague feeling of an unfamiliar body pressed against you from behind and the smell of alcohol crowding your senses on the dance floor.

No, don't think about that.

Before long you've exhausted yourselves, settled back near the edge of the pool where you started and just softly talking to each other. His big hands are all over you beneath the water, palms wide on your bare hips and tummy, caressing your thighs and your back, touching everywhere he can reach. You feel almost lightheaded with desire, eyes hooded as you peer up at him and tighten your arms around his neck, pull him closer and silently beg for more. You can feel the shape of his hardening cock through his swim trunks, pressed wet and heavy against your thigh. It makes you salivate.

You suddenly hook your chin into his shoulder, bury your face in his neck and whisper, "I wanna suck it, Joel."

"Yeah?" he murmurs, hands exploring your back and holding you tighter against him, letting you rut softly against his bulge, "You wanna go back to the room and suck on it, babygirl?"

You nod ferociously against him, "Yes. Please."

It doesn't take long at all for you both to be out of the pool and making your way back over to the chairs to grab your towels. It's frantic the way you rush to dry off, slipping back into your flip flops and shaking the water from your hair as quickly as possible. Joel follows suit, ruffling his own towel through his hair and making your body burn with need, lost in how sexy he looks with water droplets cascading down his large and strong form, dipping down his sternum and into his belly button. All you can think while you look at him is how badly you want to lick, to taste.

You're making your way back toward the entrance together when a woman runs up behind you, calling out, "Wait, hang on!" You both turn, confusion in your expressions as she reaches you and holds out something in her hand - your phone.

"I think you or your dad left this behind, sweetie," she says with a smile and places it in your grasp, "Gotta be careful!"

"Th-thank you," you manage to stutter out, eyes wide as she nods and turns away from you to head back toward the pool.

You stand there dumbstruck for a moment, thoughts muddled.

You or your dad.

Your dad.

You turn to Joel then. He's looking at you with what you can only describe as apprehension, lips downturned into a frown as he stands and waits for you to say something - anything. You stare back, words failing you.

And then you burst out laughing.

His apprehension turns into a smile, eyes crinkling at the corners as he laughs along with you and squeezes your hand in his tightly - as if to say, this isn't wrong, what we have isn't wrong and you know that. And you do, which is why he has to practically drag you back inside the hotel as you double over and heave out laugh after laugh, tears in your eyes.

"Silly girl," you hear him mumble under his breath fondly as he leads you to the elevator, and all you can do is keep giggling.

--

"I love your cock."

Your knees dig into the plush rug of the hotel room, ass sitting atop the balls of your feet as you kneel between Joel's wide legs. He's sitting comfortably on the couch, one hand resting to the side while the other strokes circles into the apple of your cheek. His cock is out of his swim trunks, heavy and hard in your palm as you slowly stroke him up and down, up and down, heart pounding in your chest.

You've done this to him before, you remind yourself, and he said it was good.

But not like this, another part of you argues, not properly.

"Yeah, you love it?" he murmurs, breaking you out of your thoughts. With his words his hand drops from your face and joins yours on his shaft, helps direct it toward your cheek so he can press the tip ever so gently against it, "What d'you love about it, baby? Tell me. Wanna know."

"It's so big, Joel," you practically whimper, brows furrowing together at the sensation of his warm stickiness on your face, "So big and so thick and long."

"I know, baby," he coos softly, smearing it along your jaw in a way that has goosebumps rising all over your flesh, "Bigger than your pretty face, huh?" At his words he delicately lays the length of his cock against your face from base to tip, lets it rest there as you close your eyes and try to calm your breathing. You're so fucking turned on.

"Big," you repeat, as if no other words can find their way to your brain, as if your brain doesn't even exist; all that exists is this. The feeling of his warm dick laying heavy across your face, precum leaking out onto your forehead.

"And what's it taste like, babygirl?" He's suddenly moving it downward, towards your mouth, and you happily lean forward to lap at the tip. It pulses against you, leaks onto the pink softness of your tongue. "Tell me what it tastes like."

"Kinda salty," you whisper, peering up at him with big eyes, "But good, it still tastes good to me." Your nose scrunches and you peer up at him sheepishly, "Tasha said it's not supposed to."

He laughs breathlessly, taps the tip against your bottom lip, and when more precum dribbles out you allow it to drip into your mouth. You swallow, eyes never leaving his, then swirl your tongue all around the head before slowly taking it into your mouth and suctioning carefully.

"God, you make me fuckin' crazy," his voice rumbles in his chest, eyes hooded, "Look at you suckin' on my cock." After a few seconds he pulls it out and taps your lips with it again, hissing a bit through his teeth, "Fuck, this mouth. And those eyes," his head leans back against the couch and he groans, low and deep, "You gotta stop lookin' at me like that, angel. M'not gonna last."

"How am I looking at you?" you ask shyly, a smile playing at your lips.

"Like... you're just so new to everything."

"But I am," you say with a breathless giggle, "It is new to me."

He smiles fondly down at you on your knees in front of him, so vulnerable, "I know," he tells you, "It makes me want you so bad."

"You have me," you whisper, leaning forward to mouth at the head of his cock once again, "M'yours, Joel."

His lids go heavy as you suckle gently on the tip again, reveling in the masculine taste of him and the way you can feel his heartbeat on the tip of your tongue. You suck it the same way you did last time - like a sucker or a popsicle - and you hope it feels good to him, hope you're doing it right.

"That's so good, baby," he murmurs, and you whimper at his praise.

You pop him out of your mouth and take a deep breath, peering up at him curiously, "Can...can you..."

His brow furrows, "Can I what, angel?"

"Can you show me how to... how to take all of it? Like, how to put it in my throat?"

The expression on his face is hard to describe, a mix of disbelief and untamed arousal. His mouth opens to speak but he doesn't say anything, taking a few seconds to formulate a response before clearing his throat and giving you a weak - and slightly wrecked - smile.

"Y'sure you wanna try that?" he asks you, ever the gentleman, "That's....it's a lot to take in your throat, babygirl."

"I know," you breathe, sincerity in your eyes, "But I wanna try."

He reaches down and thumbs a stray hair from your face, pushes it behind your ear, "You're probably gonna gag," he murmurs gently - a warning. "It might be uncomfortable for you."

You raise an eyebrow, "So... you don't want me to?"

He laughs breathlessly, "I... I didn't say I don't want it. But I don't want you to try something you don't feel ready for," he frowns, "Don't want you to feel any pressure with me."

"I don't," you admit honestly, "I don't feel any pressure, Joel, I promise. I just...really wanna try it. I want you to show me."

He takes a deep breath, strokes your cheek gently and then reaches down to hold the base of his cock again. Your hands fall to his thighs, still clad in his swim trunks.

"Lemme just see how far you can go without gaggin' first," he tells you softly, patiently, "Want you to stop when you feel it in that spot, okay? Don't go any further than that."

You nod, already beyond excited that you're learning something new, something that'll make him feel good. You open your mouth to take him back inside but he touches your face again, stopping you.

"Deep breath," he advises quietly. You do as you're told.

He helps guide the fat head of his cock past your lips, watches as you very slowly ease yourself down. You close your eyes, all your focus centered on this singular task, fighting to push past the slight discomfort of having your mouth stuffed so full. It takes barely a moment for you to reach the point he was talking about, when you feel the head of his cock brush ever so slightly against your gag reflex. On instinct, your eyes snap open, your entire body freezing in place.

"Right there?" he asks quietly, but you know he's not waiting for an answer, knows you couldn't talk even if you wanted to, "That's so much baby, good girl." His praise send throbs of pleasure to your pussy, warmth to your cheeks. Your eyes meet his and you can see how turned on he is, see the way the corners of his mouth twitch with pleasure. "Let go when you're ready, honey."

You hold yourself there for a few more seconds, eyes watering a little bit as you hold his gaze, just testing the power of your lungs and the strain of your jaw. When it becomes too much you pull your mouth off him and find yourself gasping for breath, fingers digging into the meat of his thighs as drool spills down your chin.

"How was that?" he asks, thumbing your cheek again with one hand and stroking himself with the other, working your saliva up and down his length, "Uncomfortable?"

You shake your head, "It was good," you whisper, voice a bit crackly, "I wanna try and take more, can I?"

He nods, smiles encouragingly and taps his swollen cockhead against your bottom lip again, slow and tantalizing, "Course you can, babygirl," he murmurs, "Deep breath."

You inhale deeply again, gathering as much air into your lungs as possible before sinking your mouth down onto him and allowing his thick girth to fill you all over again. This time when you feel him reach that spot, you let yourself keep going just a little bit further, allow the head of his cock to push more firmly against it and slip the tiniest bit into the back of your throat.

You gag immediately.

It's very loud; a dry wretch that you can admit sounds absolutely horrific in the current circumstance. Before you can even really process what to do next, he's tugging you off his cock, voice suddenly worried, frantic, "Okay, no, that's too much," he says quickly, and you look up to see him shaking his head, "You're gonna hurt yourself."

"M'fine," you try to garble out, but you're shocked when just talking suddenly sends you into a coughing fit. You bang on your chest and squeeze his thigh with your other hand, feeling more drool cascade down your chin and onto your bare chest.

"Angel," he says soothingly, leaning forward to pat your back, brows furrowed again in concern, "I'm sorry, honey."

You shake your head, "I-I'm okay," you splutter out, "Just gimme a second."

"It's too much," he repeats, almost pleading, "Please, baby, I don't wanna see you struggle, that's not fun for me."

As much as you hate the idea of giving up, you have to admit that he's right. That wretch had not been pleasant, and while you think you could eventually learn to take all of him, maybe forcing yourself to do it when you're supposed to be having fun on vacation isn't the best time.

"Okay," you mumble defeatedly, sitting back on your knees, "But I still wanna suck it."

He laughs again, relief flooding his features as he leans back on the couch and smiles crookedly at you, "You can still suck it, darlin'. Just take your time and don't push your limits, alright? Promise me."

"I promise."

You spend the next fifteen minutes or so playing with Joel's cock, stroking it with your hand, kitten licking along the shaft and head, just touching as much as you can without any time pressure for once. He pets your hair as he watches you, thumbs your cheeks and dimples, small groans tumbling past his lips, face scrunched in pleasure as you explore. You take as much of him as you can in your mouth, bob up and down slowly with your eyes trained on his face, feel the way his thick length twitches and pulses against your tongue.

It's almost feral the way you drink him down, hollowing your cheeks and basking in the way his body responds to you. You're so wet, aching to touch yourself but wanting this moment to be just for him, a thank you for this weekend, this hotel, for everything. Instead you palm his balls, roll them in your palm and revel in the desperate sounds he makes.

"I love your cock," you whine, repeating your earlier statement as you fist it up and down with spit pooling at the corners of your mouth, "I love it so much, Joel." You can feel yourself dripping in your bikini bottoms, feel your own slick gathering on your inner thighs.

"I know, baby," he gasps out, running one hand through his hair and the other through yours as his belly tenses and untenses, as his thighs tremble, "I know you love it, s'all yours, baby. S'your cock."

"My cock," you echo, almost a whimper, "Mine."

"Yours, it's yours," he moans loudly, hands curling into fists as his head hits the back of the couch, "Shit, I'm gonna come."

"Come in my mouth," you tell him immediately, wasting no time in sinking back down onto his length. He doesn't ask if you're sure; he's too far gone to be a gentleman anymore, and you love it. You watch as he suddenly sits up on the couch, reaches both hands forward and cradles your head in them firmly. He helps you move up and down, groaning as he does, and then-

His cock pulses on your tongue, thick and heavy, bobbing against the roof of your mouth. You feel a burst of cum hit the back of your throat, then another, and another, all the while Joel moans and holds your head in place, toes curling into the rug. Your eyes roll back as he fills your mouth, overwhelmed by the salty taste and thick texture, and - without really meaning to - you swallow around him to make more space. He practically whines at the sensation, pulsing once more to release one final burst of his spend.

And then he's falling back against the couch, cock popping out of your mouth, expression dazed. Without thinking about it you swallow the rest of his cum, eyelashes fluttering at the odd sensation of it all slipping down your throat. So much, gone in an instant. It's only then that you actually realize what you've done.

"I swallowed it," you say, panic suddenly brewing in your stomach, "Was I supposed to swallow it?"

He laughs softly, covers his mouth with the back of his hand, "It is perfectly fine that you swallowed it, darlin'," he smiles wide and opens his arms, "C'mere."

You clamor off your knees and crawl into his lap immediately, straddling his thighs and pressing your wet bikini bottoms against the slope of his belly. He lets out a little groan, pulls you in and strokes your hair.

"You did so good," he praises you softly, kisses your temple, "So good, baby. Made me come so much."

"There was a lot," you tell him, nuzzling into his neck and letting your breathing slowly even out, "S'why I swallowed it, I was trying to make room."

"Was it okay? It didn't make you gag, did it?"

You shake your head, a pout on your lips, "Felt good in my mouth," you whisper, "I liked it."

He hums, hands trailing from your hair to your bare back where he unclasps your bikini top and lets it cascade to the floor, then reaches down and tugs at your bottoms. You lift up carefully, let him slip them down your thighs and watches as you kick them off, leaving you fully naked in his lap.

"So pretty when you're bare like this," he whispers, and it sends more slick to your folds, oozing down and making a mess on his tummy. He cups your pussy in one hand and slides two fingers easily inside of you, thumb rubbing circles against your clit. You grip his arm, eyes falling closed and pitiful little sounds slipping from your mouth. "My good girl deserves a reward for suckin' my cock so good, swallowin' all that cum, don't you think?"

You nod, biting down on your lip and letting him fuck you with his digits, eyes rolling behind your lids.

"Yeah, you do," he answers for you, "You deserve it, angel. Always."

He makes you come easily, leaving you a messy, twitching heap in his lap as your arms wrap around his neck, body going lax and loose. After a few moments he picks you up and carries you to the bathroom, helps you into the shower, smiles when you peer blearily up at him through your afterglow.

"Just close your eyes and lean against me," he tells you softly as the water falls, removing his swim trunks and getting in to stand behind you, "I'll get you cleaned up, sweetheart."

--

You nap after your shower, exhausted and sated in every possible way. Joel wakes you up around two o'clock with more room service - sandwiches and soup that you devour with bright eyes and light conversation side by side in bed. It's domestic bliss the way he thumbs mustard from your lips, pours you more water, slices your key lime pie and feeds it to you with a fond smile.

I love you I love you I love you.

"Would it absolutely ruin this moment if I suggested tryin' our hand at a hymn?" he asks when you've both finished, wiping the crumbs on his fingers with a napkin and gesturing to his guitar case in the corner of the room.

You grimace, "I guess not."

"I'm just thinkin' about your parents," he places his hand on your hip - clad in another one of his shirts - and gives you a sympathetic smile, "It's probably best to pick somethin' and have it ready."

You nod. You know he's right, that your lack of preparedness these past few weeks has been pretty reckless considering it's been the entire "reason" you've been seeing him. With a sigh you slip out from under the covers and traipse over to the couch, listening as Joel unclasps the guitar case.

"I did some research," he tells you as he walks over, hooking the strap over his shoulders as he goes, "I think our best bet for an easy tune is How Great Thou Art. Pretty repetitive chord progression, only uses G, C, and D."

You make a face, crossing your arms, "I can't believe I have to do this."

He laughs, "It was either that or Come Ye Sinners, and I think that one's a little too on the nose, don't you think?" He tosses you a smile and you can't help but return it, feeling your frustration melt away under his gaze.

"Can we do that thing again where I get a reward?" you ask shyly, biting your lip. His eyebrows go up, a smirk lighting his face.

"Hmm, I think that's doable," he sits down beside you, tuning the guitar, "What'd you have in mind?" You notice the way his eyes dart toward your groin and your cheeks warm.

"I was actually thinking that maybe..." your hands play with the hem of his shirt nervously, unsure what he'll say, "maybe you could play something for me? You said last night that you've written some songs," you shrug, trying to be nonchalant, "I'd... I'd really like to hear one, if you wouldn't mind."

He peers at you for a few seconds, smirk fading briefly only to be replaced with a tender smile, eyes softening as he gazes at you. Warmth blooms in your chest. You never want him to stop looking at you like that.

"I can do that," he tells you quietly, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck, "I mean... I can't promise it'll be good, but-"

"I don't care."

He chuckles and nods, grips the guitar again and clears his throat, "Well, alright then. Let's get started."

For the first time ever, the lesson is actually a lesson. No undercurrent of sex, no inappropriate touching or sensual glances, no teasing or filthy words. You're not sure how you're able to hold yourself back so easily, able to really focus on what Joel is saying and showing you, helping place your fingers in the right locations and teach you the strumming techniques. Maybe it's because you're tired - you did come three times already today - but it's not just that.

It just feels so... normal. So easy. You think back to that first lesson, the nervousness you'd felt and the pounding of your heart in your chest, the anticipation and the fear.

It's different now. Now that he's been inside you, become one with you, it's like your whole dynamic has changed - for the better. Of course you still feel that curious nervousness, the innocence, the electricity between you. But there's something so solid and tangible about it now, something certain. Something real.

He shapes your fingers along the neck of the guitar, praising you softly every time you play a note that sounds right, encouraging you as you repeat the G chord a few times, then C, then D. You strum along slowly, taking your time, and before you know it you're playing something that actually doesn't sound half bad.

"We definitely need to work on buildin' up those calluses," he murmurs, stroking the tips of your fingers under his thumb, "Well... If you're gonna do this long-term, I mean."

You peer at him curiously, tilting your head to the side. He looks sheepish, like he's said something he hadn't meant to.

"You think I could do this, like... for real? As a hobby?"

His mouth turns up at the corners and he nods, "I think you can do anything you set your mind to, darlin'."

Your heart is suddenly in your throat at his words, emotion bubbling under the surface of your skin. You drop your hand from the guitar and reach up to cup his face, pulling him toward you to press a gentle kiss to his lips. He kisses you back just as soft, just as careful.

"Thank you," you whisper, tears pricking in your eyes, "Thank you for saying that."

He presses his forehead to yours, shakes his head ever so slightly, "Don't gotta thank me for sayin' what's true, angel. You deserve to hear it every single day."

You finish the lesson with tears still welling in your eyes, a lump in your throat. When you lean the guitar against the side of the couch he cradles your face in his hands and gently kisses the tears away, brushes his lips along your eyelids and cheeks, your jaw and your lips, saying everything without saying anything at all.

"Okay," you sigh, taking a deep breath and opening your eyes to smile sweetly at him, "Time for my reward."

He chuckles and rolls his eyes a little, reaching for the guitar and beginning to tune it again. You watch as he twists the keys, strums a little here and there, hums softly for each note to match his voice. Anticipation rises in your chest.

"Now, uh," he clears his throat a bit, avoiding eye contact, "It's been a while since I played this one but it's, uh," he takes a breath, "It's one I wrote when Sarah was born. Used to sing it to her to help her fall asleep."

You melt at the words, smiling wider, "What's it called?"

He finally meets your eyesight, lips pressing together sheepishly, "Sarah."

Oh, duh. You nod in encouragement, leaning back against the armrest of the couch and waiting for him to begin. He takes another deep breath, dropping his gaze to watch his fingers shape the first chord. It's then that you notice his hands - usually deft and steady - are trembling a little bit, so much so that he has to readjust his position on the strings a few times.

He's nervous.

He stares at his hand, takes another deep breath.

You wait.

"Sorry," he mumbles under his breath, "Sorry, just gimme a minute."

"It's okay, take your time." Your voice is barely a whisper, awestruck by the sudden vulnerability you're witnessing. He'd agreed to the reward so quickly, you'd been sure he didn't mind. But now as you sit here waiting, you're not so sure. You watch him take more deep breaths, watch as he closes his eyes and seems to center himself.

"If you don't want to-"

"I want to," he says immediately, shaking his head, "I want to, I've just... I haven't sung in a while."

Your brow furrows, confused, "You sang yesterday in the car, didn't you? And you sang Tangled Up In Blue when we first met, and that other one, the one from the eighties."

His lips turn up at the corners, a welcome smile, "Take On Me."

"Yeah, that one."

He sighs, tightening his grip on the guitar, "It's not that I haven't sung I guess. Wrong wordin'," he bites his lip, "It's moreso that I haven't sung this one. Or any of my originals. Not for a long time."

You frown, "How come?"

"I guess... I just..." he searches for the words, staring at the floor, "No one's really asked me to. And it's not like I'm playin' gigs or tourin' or any of that pipe dream stuff I thought about when I was a kid." He laughs humorlessly, like the concept is ridiculous, "So I guess I just kinda... stopped, after a while."

You feel a sudden sadness that you can't really explain, picturing that bright-eyed little version of Joel, stuck in a household that wouldn't let him grow, wouldn't let him be himself. All those dreams and big ideas, dashed before he was able to get out and make his mark. Life getting busy, too busy, other responsibilities taking up all his time until the thing he loved most became nothing but a memory. A pipe dream.

It makes your heart ache.

"D'you mind if I just..." he meets your gaze again finally, eyes soft and a little sad, "Could I maybe just hum it? Instead? I know that's kind of a cop-out, but-"

"Of course you can," you breathe out, hand coming down to rest atop his knee, "Of course you can hum it."

"I'm sorry, baby, I know you wanted -"

"It's hard being vulnerable, Joel," you interrupt him again, shaking your head and stroking your thumb against his skin, "God knows it's been hard for me, and you've been nothing but patient." You give him a watery smile and he returns it, "Please take your time. I can be patient too, I promise."

You can tell how much he appreciates it. He reaches down and picks up your hand, presses a gentle kiss to the back of it before setting it back down and taking one last deep breath.

"Well, here it is," he says with a little more confidence, a smile playing at his lips.

You've heard him play before, obviously; you've already seen the way his fingers work the strings like it's just second nature, the way his thumb strums out the chords effortlessly. But this time is different. Knowing what he's playing is completely original, born from his own creativity out of love and devotion, a father's affection and protectiveness, it just sounds special. New. He begins to pluck out a soft, slow, soothing melody that immediately puts you at ease, makes you lean back further against the couch and loosen your body. It's tender, quiet - a lullaby.

He hums softly, voice crackling a bit in his throat at first but then settling into a smooth and comforting sound. It's almost like a waltz, the way the chords change back and forth, in and out, slow and steady. Of course you wonder what the real words are, what his quiet hums are substituting, but you find that it doesn't really matter. What matters is the look on his face, eyes distant, as if he's picturing his daughter as she was when she was little. You try to picture it too, thinking of the photograph in his house, the one of him pushing Sarah on the swing. Just a father and his little girl, against the world.

It isn't a very long song. It fades out relatively quickly, and as soon as he strums out the final chord you sit up on the couch and clap ferociously, tears stinging in your eyes all over again.

"I'd usually, uh, play it a couple times for her," he says awkwardly, "'Til she fell asleep."

"It was beautiful," you tell him earnestly, "It was so beautiful, Joel."

He shakes his head with an embarrassed laugh and swivels around to go place his guitar back in its case. He doesn't say anything else, but he doesn't need to. You know how he feels when you spot the tips of ears, tinged pink, warm from your praise.

--

The rest of the day passes in what feels like a warm, luxurious, passionate blur. You go to dinner that evening and order lobster, revel in the way it practically melts in your mouth with sips of champagne and bites of blueberry cheesecake. Joel tells you a little more about his life, tells you everything you want to know about his daughter and his ex. It's not a difficult or uncomfortable conversation like you'd been worried it might be. Instead, you feel closer learning these things about him, feel even more connected to him than you did before as he tells you about Mish and Sarah, their relationship, the arrangement.

"I think I understand it better now," you tell him thoughtfully, "Now that I've actually..." you peer at him shyly, "You know... done it."

He chuckles, "Sex is a powerful thing, it really is. And when you find someone you're compatible with it can be really easy to keep goin' back to 'em. Settle into it, you know? Even if the other parts of your relationship don't work."

"It's like...friends with benefits, right?"

"Exactly. And it really does work for some people, worked for Mish and I for a long time," he shakes his head and reaches across the table to take your hand, "But that's over now, I need you to know that. It's over. You're the only woman in my life and that's how I want it to be. You believe me right?"

His eyes are soft, warm, loving, sincerity practically glowing in his expression.

"I believe you, Joel. Of course I believe you."

You have sex again when you get back to the room, slow and intimate and tender and perfect. You claw at his back as whimpers and cries tear from your mouth, writhing in pleasure beneath him on the bed as he fills you over and over, murmurs filth in your ear and presses down on your clit with his thumb. It's like you've died and gone to heaven, this feeling of permanent bliss and satisfaction, the sensation of being so full and so connected. It's the closest you've ever felt to real inner peace; who would have thought that sitting on a cock instead of in a church pew would be the thing to bring you closer to godliness?

I pray at the church of Joel Miller, you think to yourself as you recover from your fifth orgasm of the day, laying there with fluttering lashes and heaving belly, mind foggy and eyes bleary. Joel is kissing your thighs somewhere below, whispering praises, humming against your skin as he wipes a warm cloth over your twitching pussy.

"I keep thinking about how many sins I've committed in the last twenty four hours," you mumble to him, sleep quickly making its way into your psyche, "And then I remember that I don't care."

His laugh is the last thing you hear before you drift off.

--

Sunday morning is bittersweet. You spend most of it wrapped in Joel's embrace, tracing the freckles and scars on his skin, drifting in and out of consciousness while he peppers kisses all over your face and neck. You have to leave the hotel by noon, get back on the road again and head back home, but the bed is so warm. He's so warm. Everything is warm.

"You never fucked me in the shower," you whisper to him softly, so quiet you wonder if he can even hear you, "Or on the floor."

"I still can," he murmurs, voice husky with sleep, fingers trailing delicately through your hair, "We have a little time."

You nuzzle into his warmth and close your eyes, sighing contentedly, "No," you breathe, "I just want you to hold me."

So he does.

--

The drive home is quieter, but not in a bad way. You're still tired from your escapades and find yourself dozing every so often, vaguely aware of Joel turning down the volume or switching the song to something more chill when he notices you starting to drift. His hand is ever-present on your thigh, stroking the skin over and over like it's just habit at this point. You know you should be forcing yourself to stay awake, to enjoy these last few hours before life goes back to normal, but he really did a number on you.

It's only when you stop at a gas station - the same one where you first saw the playlist you weren't sure you were meant to - that you finally start to feel more awake.

"So tell me about this Angel playlist," you say with a smirk, waving his phone at him as he gets back in the truck, "Can we listen to it?"

A look of surprise crosses his face, but he doesn't seem upset, "How did you even find out about that?"

"I'm in control of the music, remember? It's your spotify."

He groans, cheeks flushing as he pushes on the gas and pulls out of the station, avoiding eye contact. "You were not supposed to see that."

Intrigue floods your brain, fuels your grin, "So it's for me?"

He takes a moment to respond, thumb stroking the wheel as he eyes the road, lip between his teeth. You can tell he's debating whether or not he should answer you, but his silence says everything. Impatient, you practically bounce in your seat, "Can we listen to it? Pretty please?"

He laughs a little breathlessly, shaking his head in disbelief, "Who is this girl sittin' in the front seat of my truck?" He squeezes your thigh, "You're gettin' bold, darlin'. I like it."

"Enough to let me listen to the playlist?"

He sighs, but you know he's not mad, can see the smile tugging at his lips, "...Maybe. At least enough to listen to one song. Will that tide you over?"

"Yes, it most certainly will," you're already tapping Angel, eyes alight with curiosity, "Which song?"

"Northern Sky by Nick Drake, should be the first one there."

You turn to him with a raised brow, "How do you know that's the first song?"

"'Cause I made the damn playlist."

"And you listen to it a lot?"

He laughs again, eyes rolling fondly as he turns his attention back to the road and grins at your words, "You're somethin' else."

You've still got a shit eating grin on your face as the song starts, the soft strumming of guitar filling the small space. Oh, this is pretty. You playfully nod your head to the chords and he rolls his eyes again, strokes your thigh and keeps his attention focused on the road.

And then the lyrics start.

I never felt magic crazy as this I never saw moons, knew the meaning of the sea I never held emotion in the palm of my hand Or felt sweet breezes in the top of a tree But now you're here Brighten my northern sky

Your grin fades almost immediately, realization blooming on your face as the reality of what this playlist actually is begins to dawn on you. You'd thought maybe it was songs he wanted to share with you, songs he wanted to teach you how to play. Just random tunes that he compiled together with you in mind.

No, that's not what this is at all. As the lyrics continue, the melody growing more steady, more beautiful, you realize that these are songs that remind him of you. An entire playlist dedicated to the way he feels.

You stare at the road as the song plays out, not speaking. Your eyes are stinging with tears but you can't bring yourself to say anything, to even look at him. You feel him squeeze your thigh again, a comforting and reassuring little gesture. As if to say, l know, I'm here. As the final chords fade out you frantically reach for his phone and press pause, out of respect for his privacy but also because you're completely unprepared to hear another song like that. You catch him peering at you in your periphery, and you will yourself to look at him with watery eyes.

"Satisfied?" he asks softly, giving you that gorgeous crooked smile.

All you can choke out is a "Yeah."

--

Arriving back at the parking garage hurts. Joel pulls his truck in beside your car, still in the same spot you'd left it, and takes the key out of the ignition with a long sigh. You look over at him, emotion burning in your throat.

"I don't wanna go home," you whisper.

"Oh, babygirl," he murmurs, brow furrowing, "C'mere." He holds his arms open and you clamor over the center console to settle into his lap, burying your face in his neck. He holds you tight and rubs your back, hushes you softly when you start to cry. How is this weekend already over? How are things just supposed to go back to normal now?

"I don't want you to go back there either," he breathes, "If I had it my way you'd be comin' home with me." You feel him press a kiss to the spot just beneath your ear, "But you're strong. You're stronger than you think you are and I know you can get through this. Whatever they have to say, whatever they do, you'll get through it. We'll get through it together."

You don't say anything else, just melt into the warmth of his body and let him hold you, comfort you, until your cries and hiccups fade into even breaths. You pull back slowly and peer at his beautiful face, long to say the words you've been holding back all weekend - but you know there's a reason you've been holding back, know this isn't the right time, not yet.

Instead, you kiss him. It's soft and sweet, a tender goodbye. Temporary, fleeting. You know it's not forever, know you'll probably sneak over tomorrow night to see him again under cover of darkness, find yourself in his bed, get wrapped up in him. But it's a goodbye nonetheless. A goodbye to this - the simplicity, the sense of normalcy and lack of time constraints, the domestic bliss and the thrill of the escape. A goodbye to the bliss.

Driving away from him a few minutes later, watching his truck fade into the distance in your rearview mirror - you think it might be one of the hardest things you've ever had to do.

[urfavlarry]

hi! can u write about a drunk love confession lolll 😭🎀

Why’d you only call me when your high?

Joost Klein x fem!reader

warnings: swearing, bad grammar, mentions of alc0hol

summary: you and Joost have been friends for a few years now but ever since he got more recognized after his song ‘friesenjung’ came out you both became more distant. What will you do after he calls you for the first time in months, drunk?

A/N: this is um.. long .. enjoy!

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You were alone in the house, your parents went off to the neighbours to go grilling. You decided to not go since you were doing things with them the whole day and you just felt exhausted. You went to cook yourself a quick meal, just some toast with whatever on top. You looked at the time, 10:28PM. Joost was performing currently in Amsterdam, not that you knew anything about it. He was probably going to get a few drinks with friends after it like he usually did after his last concert of the season. He has probably long forgot about you, probably replacing you with someone else by now. Ever since he became more famous, you both stopped reaching out as often. There wasn’t any hate behind it, Joost wasn’t the type to cut people off because of fame which you loved about him and you missed him dearly you just.. drifted apart?

You went back up to your room, deciding to go to sleep early tonight, opening the window for some cool air to come into the room. The covers called your name, snuggling into them and getting comfortable. You fall asleep a few minutes later, the room was dark and the wind entered your room like an unwelcome guest, goosebumps appearing on your skin.

A buzzing noise wakes you up, your phone lighting up and blinding your tired eyes. You try and get up, body still a bit weak since you woke up about 5 seconds ago. You grab your phone and your heart skips a beat, the name “duck” appearing on your phone. It was a nickname you gave to Joost years ago. You were teens, trying to make up nicknames for each other and you just took the word dutch and turned it into duck. You watch it ring for a few seconds and then sigh, cursing a bit then pick it up. “Hello?” You say, your voice raspy and very tired sounding. “Hallo?” You hear the dutch accent you oh so loved come through the phone. “Hello, hello.” You turn around and lay on your stomach, waiting for him to speak. The noises in the background were loud and clear, loud music coming through the phone. “Is dat het meisje waar je het over had?” (Is that the girl you were talking about?) “ja ja ga nu..” (yea yea, go now.)

He shifted around before he spoke again. “Sorry, what’s up?” You raise a brow, was this some kind of phone call you get from your dad once a year? “Nothing much, why are you calling me?” He chuckles, voice deep and handsome like always. “Can I not call mijn liefde?” (my love) “What are you on about Joost? Are you drunk?” “No, no.” He slurs, making you scoff. “Yeah, yeah.” He was mumbling things in dutch you couldn’t understand; “Ik wil niemand anders dan jou.. mijn lief meisje.” (I want no one else but you.. my sweet girl.) “Fucking hell Joost.. where the hell are you? Is Apson with you?” He nods, which you barely heard but at least he gave you an answer. Apson would mostly stay sober, only having a few drinks so you decided to call him. He picked up, voice cheerful like always. You told him to take Joost home since he sounded like he had enough for the night and he kindly agreed. You thank him, ending the call with him before trying to go back to sleep.

3:07AM, another phone call wakes you up. “What the fuck is wrong with him..” You ask yourself before picking up. “Joost it’s 3AM can you go to sleep?” You demand and he just smiles. Oh yeah you were on face time now, great. You looked like a zombie compared to him, he looked more energetic than you did, his hair wet and it looked like he was shirtless. Probably just got out of the shower. “I wanted to see your stunning face schatje.” He says, laying down on his side, the side of his face resting against a pillow.

You sigh, watching him like a hawk. The light coming from his side of the phone blinded you, making you groan. “What do you want? I’m exhausted from your bullshit.” You say and he pouts; “Why are you so mean, hm? Do you not miss me?” He asks, smiling, his adorable, genuine smile. “Joost stop it.” He chuckled, moving around in his room when he suddenly turned his lights off, the only light that let you see his face was from his LEDs. He started mumbling things again, his voice lulling you to sleep but you fought back the urge to sleep. “Jij bent zo schitterend..” (you’re so stunning) “Joost I’m hanging up.” “No, no.. Blijf bij me.” (stay with me) “Ik wil je Y/N.” (I want you Y/N.) “Ik krijg je niet uit mijn hoofd.” (I can’t get you out of my head.) All of these things meant nothing to you. You didn’t speak dutch, maybe a few phrases and words but you weren’t fluent. You brushed off all of those phrases, when he said the one thing he taught you during your time as close friends. “Ik hou van jou lieverd.” (I love you sweetheart.)

You face turned bright red, quickly hanging up and flipping onto your back. Your eyes were wide eyed, staring at the dark ceiling above you. You internally scream, maybe he meant it in a friendly way? But the nickname?? It was weird. He was just drunk after all, it probably didn’t even mean anything. You try to fall asleep, tossing and turning before finally succeeding.

Morning came quicker than usual, making your stomach turn and face feel hot. You didn’t even dare open your phone, deciding to pack your things and head home to Amsterdam a little earlier than expected. You booked a flight, canceling the one you were supposed to take 3 days later then this one.

The minute you got home you opened the messages. Some were from last night and some were from a few minutes ago. You tried replying but no words were coming to mind, your fingers just hovering above the cold screen.

———————————————————

Duck🦆💙

Y/N

Y/N

Hello??

why did u hang up hm?

blijf bij me

please

ik krijg je niet uit mijn hoofd

sent 16 hours ago

————————— new messages —————————

Y/N

Im so sorry I woke u up yesterday

I was drunk haha

hope to see u soon, today Im performing in that club we used to go to as teens

ill look for u after

———————————————————

You contemplated whether to go or not. You wanted to see him, but another part of you didn’t. Why should you be the one running back to him? It made no sense to you, yet you went. It was like you were in a daze, getting ready, taking the train to the city he was performing in.. it all felt forced in a way. You got stopped by a few fans then made your way to the barrier. You bought a ticket last minute most people already in the club waiting for their idol to come up on stage. 15 minutes until it started, you felt disgusting. Sweaty fan girls who never heard of a shower were all around you, all you wanted to do was curl yourself into a ball and dissapear on the spot. It will be so akward talking after almost a year of barely knowing of each other’s pressence yet you still wanted to see him, hug him.. kiss him.

The concert went by fast, you and Joost making eye contact several times which made you even more anxious than you were before. You walked back stage, most of the security recognising you and letting you pass which surprised you. The halls felt endless, walking in front of his door you gently knocked almost instantly hearing footsteps. And there he was. He changed a lot. His hair was now longer, looking more mature but he was still there. Your Joost. “Weren’t you supposed to be the one looking for me?” He rubbed his neck, chuckling awkwardly before pulling you into the room. It looked like he was trying to find the right words to start which made you count down the dreadful seconds going by.

“Well, what I said yesterday was true. I don’t remember all of it but from the messages I said it was pretty obvious. I really do love you and I hate that you aren’t by my side. I hate that I can’t wake up with you in my arms. I miss you. I miss your smile, your energy, I miss hearing your thoughts, I miss everything about you. Liefje please I need you I can’t live without you.” He looked at you with those beautiful ocean blue eyes, looking desperate but it was obvious he truly meant every single word. You smile softly, cupping his cheeks. “I love you too. You have no idea how much I’ve been missing you. It was like a part of my heart was taken away from me.” He kissed your forehead, smiling down at you. “I promise to never leave you. Never.” “Promise.”

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[nayedoll]

ik wil je

joost klein x reader

summary : your crush on joost doesn’t seem so unrealistic after he dedicates one of his songs to you at his concert.

warnings : fluff, a bit suggestive towards the end but nothing crazy

a/n : some parts written in dutch may not be correct since i don’t speak dutch so im sorry in case there r any mistakes. 😞

rpf ahead, do not read if uncomfortable !!!

───────────────────────

“When is he coming on stage?” your friend, Jenna, asked as you both entered the venue where Joost’s concert was being held at.

“In two hours I think,” you answered, raising your voice a bit to be heard over the loud talking from the people around you. Jenna groaned, already feeling tired at the thought of waiting for so long.

“I cannot believe you convinced me to come this early to a concert just because you have a crush on this dude,” she rolled her eyes, earning a laugh from you.

“Who said I have a crush on him?” you teased her, both of you knowing that Joost’s music wasn’t the only thing you liked about him. You had discovered Joost through some friends shortly after having moved to Amsterdam to study abroad. The blonde artist had charmed you since the beginning and it wasn’t long before you found yourself having a little crush on him, one that you deemed as silly and would never act upon.

Although you knew there was no chance of him ever being romantically involved with you, in the back of your mind, there was still a hidden hope for something to happen at the concert. However, you would never try to initiate anything yourself and risk making him uncomfortable by doing so.

“Well if we’re gonna stand for two hours, we should at least try and get to the front,” Jenna suggested, took your hand and led you through the crowd at the arena, the air immediately becoming hotter as you pushed through the sweaty bodies of people.

Your decision to come earlier was proven to have paid off, seeing as there weren’t too many people at the venue yet. Eventually, you noticed an empty spot at the front with a direct view of the stage and walked there in a hurry to claim it for yourself and Jenna.

The stage was relatively small, with a big screen in the background that read joost klein on it. The strobe lights illuminated the room in various colors and you squeaked in excitement as you turned to face your friend, squeezing her arm.

“So what’s your plan now?” Jenna asked, her eyes scanning you up and down in a smirk. You furrowed your eyebrows, confused by her smug expression.

“My plan? Enjoy the concert I guess,” you scoffed and watched as disappointment took over her face. “What?” you exclaimed and lightly patted her shoulder.

“This is the hottest you’ve ever looked and you’re just going to enjoy the concert?” she mocked you in a coy tone. You bit back a smile. Jenna read you like an open book, being able to see right through your intentions to catch Joost’s attention with your outfit.

“Well, what do you want me to do? Go up there and fuck him?” you said as Jenna’s face lit up at your words.

“Well I don’t think he’d mind that,” she shrugged her shoulders and you playfully slapped her shoulder again, shushing her.

You two chatted as you waited, the venue growing more crowded by the minute and drowning out your nervous thoughts. After what was approximately two and a half hours, the lights finally stopped switching colors and settled on a purple hue, signaling that Joost was about to go on stage.

The familiar intro of Joost’s song, droom groot started playing, resulting in people screaming in anticipation. As Joost came out, dressed in a white button up and long black trousers, the screams only grew louder. You felt your pulse racing, your heartbeat becoming even louder than the bass ringing in your ears.

“Hallo Amsterdam,” Joost yelled into the microphone and scanned the crowd in a smile before his eyes lingered on yours. You felt Jenna’s hand playfully push you and quickly turned to look at her as she mouthed told you with a smug smile.

The rest of the concert went by normally with people dancing and screaming the lyrics to Joost’s songs. In spite of your wishes, Joost didn’t interact with you much, other than shooting continuous glances in your direction. You didn’t think much of them though, seeing as he was also interacting a lot with other people at the front.

“Dus dit volgende nummer,” (so this next song) Joost began saying and the crowd quieted down, “is een beetje anders,” (is a bit different). He suddenly looked much more nervous, his hands slightly fidgeting with his sweaty hair.

“Het is romantischer denk ik,” (it’s more romantic i guess) he chuckled and some people started cheering, you and Jenna included. “Oké hier gaan we.” (okay here we go). The audience erupted into screaming as you recognized the song to be ik wil je - one of your personal favorites of his.

You danced along to the song, putting one arm around Jenna as you noticed people hugging and jumping up and down to the beat. The atmosphere was electric and it saddened you that you would have to leave soon and return to everyday responsibilities.

It seemed like you were too caught up in the moment to notice Joost running to your direction with a smug smile. You gasped as he grabbed your hand, intertwining his fingers firmly with yours. He began singing the chorus of the song, his blue eyes piercing your face that was burning hot by that point.

“Ik wil je, blijf bij me, hou van me, ga nooit meer weg” were the only things you could hear, too focused on Joost to notice all the screams around you. You smiled at him while yelling the lyrics, the immense chemistry between the two of you obvious to everyone in the room.

The moment ended as quickly as it started as Joost let go of your hand reluctantly and backed away, breaking eye contact. Jenna shook you, bringing you back to reality and you realized only then how shaky your legs had become.

“Dude, what the fuck?” she said in a low tone as the music stopped and all you could do was shrug your shoulders and laugh in disbelief.

The concert soon came to an end as more people gradually started leaving the venue, you and Jenna being the last ones to exit the building. You were constantly checking your surroundings in hopes of spotting Joost somewhere, anywhere but to no avail. Jenna breathed a sigh of relief at the feeling of the fresh night air as you both stepped outside.

“Wanna go for drinks?” she suggested and you nodded quietly, letting her lead the way. You ended up at a small bar, a few minutes away from the venue and sat at a table near the window that showed the glistening streets, busy with cars and people passing by.

“You know you’re stupid for not getting his number, right,” Jenna broke the silence, taking a shot of her drink.

“What was I supposed to do, jump on stage?” you protested, rubbing your fingers anxiously. In all seriousness, you were bitter about what had happened earlier, mentally slapping yourself as you realized that you could, should, have pursued Joost more. But then again, if Joost was truly into you, he surely would have tried to make a move on you after the concert, right? Disappointment took over you at the realization that this was most likely some act with the sole purpose of the show, or maybe even a silly dare from his friends.

Jenna sensed your frustration and reached for your hand over the table. “Hey,” she smiled, “He’s just some guy after all, don’t forget that!” You chuckled and gave her a nod, taking a sip of your drink in an attempt to shake off the sad state you were in.

A couple of minutes passed in which you managed to have fun, letting Jenna be the speaker. Your attention on her was soon captured by the glass door opening and five tall men coming in. Your eyes widened as you recognized the last man to be Joost and Jenna seemed to notice, glancing back to see what had caused your reaction.

“No fucking way,” she exclaimed and you hushed her, burying your face in your hands.

As you lifted your head again, you were met with Joost looking directly at you, seemingly shocked as well. His friends caught on to his gaze and shared a knowing smile before one of them started singing what sounded like the words to ik wil je, teasing Joost, who let out a shy laugh. You lowered your gaze, fighting back a grin and heard Joost mumble shut up followed by a couple of laughs.

“I’m going for a smoke,” Jenna announced somewhat loudly, grabbed her purse and headed for the door, not before winking at you. Joost’s eyes flickered awkwardly between you and his friends, who had already taken a seat without him noticing. You nodded at the empty chair across from you, encouraging him to approach you, which he gladly did.

“Hey,” he smiled as he sat down, the orange light that emitted from the small lamp on the table making his dimples all the more visible. He gave you a handshake and you got chills at the familiar warmth of his big palm against yours - for the second time that night.

“Hi,” you breathed before properly introducing yourself to him.

“Pretty name,” he noted and you thanked him, your eyes never leaving his. He looked slightly different than before, wearing the same pants but with a black hoodie on top. His blonde hair wasn’t as messy anymore and a pair of glasses now covered his eyes, making him even prettier.

“Didn’t expect to see you here,” you said, switching topics.

“Yeah me neither,” Joost replied, “But I guess things happen for a reason, don’t they?” he grinned and you narrowed your eyes at him.

“What do you mean?”

“I looked for you after the concert ended but I just guessed you left in a hurry,” he went on to explain. You wet your lips in an attempt to hide your smile and your delight at the confirmation that he had in fact looked for you.

“Yeah, sorry about that,”

“What are you sorry for?” he asked, laughing.

“I should have searched for you as well but I just left,” you said apologetically, “Doesn’t that make me kind of an asshole?”

“A bit,” Joost answered, you scoffed at his bluntness and hit him playfully on his arm. “But you can always make up for it,” You raised your eyebrows at his smug expression, curious as to what he was insinuating.

“How?” you smirked, rubbing your legs together under the table to cool off the sudden rush of heat you got. Even if his initial comment wasn’t suggestive, the idea had still entered your mind as newfound desires emerged, that didn’t seem so unrealistic anymore.

“You’ll have to find out lieverd,” he said all too casually as a small chuckle left your lips.

Just then, your phone vibrated with a message from Jenna, informing you that her boyfriend would be picking her up and wishing you a fun night. You texted her back quickly, something about how lucky you were to have her as a friend and that you owe her, before setting your phone down and looking at Joost who questioned the excitement in your face.

“Wanna get out of here?” you asked him with as much confidence as possible, he nodded eagerly. His excitement only grew when he watched you get up from your seat and fix your already short skirt.

This was the first time you were both directly standing next to each other, finally noticing how much taller he was compared to you. You waited by the door for him while he briefly spoke to his friends, who seemed to cheer him on in a bad attempt at remaining quiet.

As you exited the bar, you winced at the cold air against your bare thighs, regretting your decision to wear a leather jacket instead of a long warm coat.

“I have a car, let’s go,” you held Joost’s hand and quickly walked with him to the direction of your car.

“Didn’t know you could drive,” Joost grinned.

“I can do a lot of things,” you responded.

“We’ll see about that.”

-

On the way to your place, Joost’s hand rested on your exposed thigh as you talked about various things, genuinely enjoying the company of one another. He drew small circles on your skin every now and then, the tingling sensation sending shivers down your spine.

After what felt like hours, you finally reached your place and got out of the car. You were struggling to find the right key to open the door when Joost came up behind you and stole your attention.

“Ik wil je, blijf bij me” he began singing, his voice just a bit louder than a whisper. He approached you, his arms holding your waist closer as he made you dance along to the rhythm.

“Hou van me, ga nooit meer weg”. The last words were hardly heard as Joost closed the distance between you and locked his lips with yours in a slow kiss. You kissed back almost immediately, the taste of cigarettes and liquor becoming clearer in your mouth as he deepened the kiss. He lowered his hands to your ass, caressing the area over the thin fabric of your skirt. Meanwhile, you played with his hair, gently running your fingers through his blonde locks. You felt his glasses softly press against your face, which confirmed that this was reality, that he was actually there, kissing you the way that he did.

You drew back, allowing yourself to breathe. His face was flushed, lips glistening with your lip gloss and his hair looked messy as he stared down at you with desperation.

“I should have taken you on a date first.” Joost admitted, letting out a small chuckle.

“That can be arranged for another time.” You kissed his lips softly before finally unlocking the door and dragging him inside by his shirt, excited for what the night would bring.

[simplyjake]

Enha hyungs w / idol!reader !!

summary: tbh its pretty self explanitory, fem!reader

a/n guys maybe at one point ill write for maknae line but also idk so dont hold me to it, not proof-read

Heeseung

Let’s say ur in aespa

So rmbr the drama challenge they did

Instead of winter it was you and karina right

OUUUU ik he was giggling when you asked him to do the challenge with you

At the end of the challenge he puts his arm around u 

He looks at u like you hung the stars one by one

Heeseung pls this is gonna be posted later

ITS WORSE AT AWARD SHOWS

When you are on screen performing 

He has the biggest heart eyes and a slight smile pls

Its like he dgaf if yall get caught

Definitely interacts with you in public when he can

He wants to see all those ship edits

Invites you to his concerts and you invite him to yours

Once bought like 500 albums so he can get all of ur pcs and inclusions

Ur honor he was being silly!

And in luv w you!!!

Jay

Okay stayc member i see u

He learns how to play ur songs on guitar

Such a cute supportive bf

You guys have sm matching things tgt

Phone cases, hats, jewelry and more

Surprisingly no one has caught on yet.

He lurks on stayc twt for updates when hes away on tour

Even tho he can just text u himself

You accidentally left your jay signed album in the open on live

EVERYONE WAS FREAKING OUT

“Omfg yall since when did y/n and jay know each other”

” Wait but the signed album? Do yall rmbr when we caught them w matching hats but no one batted an eye WHAT ABT THIS”

Call jake for the dating rumor damage control selfie

Anyways he has all ur albums and you have all his

He found out you voted for him during Iland days and sobbed

Staycs number 1 fan, will fight ANYONE for that title

JAKE

Worse than heeseung when it comes to hiding things

Oh lord here we go

“My girl- i mean my friend” its rover.

On live streams he uses this to promote your group without looking suspicious 

“Have you guys heard le sserafims comeback? It’s so good”

“Oh Y/n? Yeah her part was amazing as well”

When he sings your part of the song it has u blushing on the other end of the phone

Once you were on a live, you forgot to let jake know

You were showing some photos that youre gonna post on instagram and all of a sudden

Is this love by Bob Marley aka the ringtone you have for jake

And his contact name “yunie<3” pops up

Quickly you decline the call and look sheepishly to the camera

Hoons time to do the selca damage control.

He accidentally liked a y/njake post on twt on the main acc tho

Ruh roh 

Sunghoon

Definition of nonchalant 

Nonchalant king if u will

Well besides that one time when he was mcing

And your group purple kiss was with him and wony

He was definitely getting side eyed by the fandom after sending you quick glances and a smile!!

Other than that baby hes an illusion

He dont know you

Well at least to the cameras, he doesnt know you

Otherwise hes the sweetest bf to ever bf

Sends you flowers to your dressing room after performances

Always claps whenever you guys win an award

Once a camera was pointed on him at an award show during your song

But he pointed to ur group telling them to focus on yall instead

UGH i love supportive bf hoon!!

Ofc your one of enhas biggest supporters as well

No one knows this but you have a secret sunghoon fan acc

He thinks its cute, a way to publicly say u love him

Without it actually being public yk

[ilwonuu]

hiii love all of your work btw!!

hear me out please!, this might be a long one😭

okay so you and jaehyun (or whatever idol you may want to use) are best friends. and have been since childhood! your a dancer and he’s a idol so your schedules are complicated. your very close with each other’s families. so one day you visit his mom like usual and surprisingly he is there with his group visiting home too, which you didn’t know he was visiting. you guys are excited to see each other and everyone can see your chemistry ( you get introduced to everyone) but you guys say y’all are “best friends” even his family see it. y’all flirt. (a lot) boom spend the night smut and boom😭😭😭.

(ik it’s a lot i’m sorry😭)

thank u for saying u enjoy my work ily<3 NO NO ITS NOT A LOT ITS OERFECT KSJSHA,,, i love this idea and of course i love rhis idea with jaehyun ehehshs!! i hope u enjoy,,, thank youu for requesting <3

multiply

⤑ jeong jaehyun

𖤓 pairing- best friends to lovers, idol!jaehyun x nonidol!femreader, softdom!jae x sub!reader, established friendship

𖤓 warnings- lots of cringe flirting, kissing, fingering(f receiving), dirty talk, slight smut heheheheh(dw lmk if you want another smut part), lmk what else<333

𖤓 a/n- hiiiii im fulfilling my lovely anon’s ask!!! im so happy that u requested something!! i based this fic off of some of the lyrics from this song<3 thank u for reading🙃🙃

you almost cry after finding out about your 4 days off. you’ve been working yourself to the core with dancing. of course it’s something you love but you really need a break. you decide to go your best friends house. you know he isn’t going to be be there but it’s fine because you’re just as close with his family. his mother always being there for you whenever you needed. today you could use the company. you knock on the door a couple times waiting for her to open the door. to your surprise your very handsome best friend opens the door with a big smile.

“get in here.” he pulls you into a big hug. “jae? you didn’t tell me you were free!” you roll your eyes at him, letting go of him to greet his mother. you hug her with a smile. “i came to see you.” you smile getting comfortable a little more. you wave to the other guys in the room. “hi guys! i’m y/n nice to finally meet you all. i’ve heard a lot.” jaehyun smiles as he introduces each of the members to you.

“yea we have heard a lot too!” haechan smirks at you and jaehyun, causing johnny and mark to snicker at him. “you’re so pretty!” jungwoo says after you compliment his outfit. you smile knowing that you two will be great friends. exchanging numbers with the guys as you and jaehyun basically have the same friends. jaehyun pulls your attention back to him when he grabs your hand.

“so you guys are friends?” yuta asks looking as you guys intensely. “yea- best friends.” you smile at jaehyun. they see right through what you guys are telling yourselves. “definitely.” doyoung says as he laughs at how red jaehyun got at the question. “okay! are you guys hungry?” mrs. jeong cuts the silence with a smile.

after dinner, you and jaehyun spent the night watching your favorite childhood movies laughing and fucking flirting. how could you not flirt with the boy? it’s hard having a hot best friend (a lot of people suffer from this!!!) he has you in his arms as he mindlessly rubs your sides. you are melting in his arms. “i missed you.” he says taking your attention from the movie.

“i missed you more jae.” you smile at him. he blushes hard at the gesture. “no like i seriously couldn’t wait to see you. i couldn’t stop thinking of you.” he holds you tighter. “ew you’re being cheesy all of a sudden.” you playfully push him away. “shut up you love it baby.” you choke on your spit. baby?? what the fuck he never calls you baby. obviously because you guys are just friends,,,,definitely! “im just messing with you.” he smiles at you innocently.

“you’re annoying.” he shakes his head. “you don’t really think so, you like me too much.” he kisses your cheek and at first it seems sweet until he moves his kisses down your jaw. “is this okay?” your breath hitches as he holds you in place. “jaehyun- what are you doing?” you look at him nervously. “tell me you don’t want this and i’ll stop right now.” he rubs your side gently. “no- i want this.” you nod at him and he smiles.

“relax baby.” he helps you out of your shorts leaving you in just your panties. your back is against his chest as you rest between his legs. “look at me- good girl.” he smiles at you pulling you to kiss him. “i’ve wanted you like this for so long.” his voice is quiet as it leaves his lips. he’s been trying to ignore his feelings as were you. anyone could see that you guys were more than friends.

“kiss me again.” you sighed against his chest. he chuckles a little kissing your cheek before turning your head to kiss your lips. you moan into the kiss as your legs spread. his hand snakes to your thighs rubbing it gently.

“jaehyun- touch me.” you whisper to him. he nods at you pecking your lips. you grab his hand to move it higher against your thigh. he just smirks at you teasingly. “you’ve been thinking about this for a while huh baby? my hands touching you like this?” he teases as he moves your panties to the side.

“look at how wet you are just from me talking to you.” you nod shamelessly laying your head back on him. you feel one of his fingers sink into your aching cunt. “dirty girl, you are soaking.” he smirks at you as he adds another finger inside of you. “feels so good.” you sigh at the feeling. he scissors his fingers inside of you making you moan out his name. “mm jaehyun-“ you start to squirm as you get closer to your high.

“yea, you gonna cum baby?” he kisses your neck as he curls his fingers. you cum undone on his fingers with a sigh. “fuck you’re perfect.” he pulls you into a kiss. “do best friends finger each other?” jaehyun asks with a laugh causing you to roll your eyes at him. “you ruined the moment.” he smirks at you. “come here baby.” he pulls you into his arms before smothering you in kisses. “i want you to be my girlfriend, not my best friend.”

[decapitatedsnake]

My little (to no) context reaction to the wisdom saga 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

(I couldn't stay up to watch the live so I'm just listening to the music = no animatics)

[30th of august 14:58]

Legendary

. I mean I've already heard legendary but I'm excited

. Gorgeous music, I feel transported into like ancient greece

. This sounds amazing

. The guy who voices Telemachus (MICO?) is adorable

. I don't like the riffs but he sounds good

. Telemachus deserves the world

. "L-l-l-l egendary"

. 108??!

. Isn't he like 13 here? (anywhere from 12-15 i feel like)

. I don't think we got a snippet of the ending

. MAN OF THE HOUSE

. AHHHA

. 20 YEARS?? WHAT

. I can't tell if they said 12 or 20

."BOY" Lowkey scared me

. EXCUSE YOU SIR TRAMP?? WHO DOES HE THINK-

. Antinous didn't come to play DAYUM

. This is insane

. "Whatcha gonna do about it champ?" Jorge was totally right Ayron is such a good Antinous

. Awwww he can't do anything :<

. Wait?

Little wolf

. GET HIM TELEY

. I love Antinous's voice

. I really loved the snippets for this one

. "I'll teach you all the lessons your daddy never could" it's on sight actually

. And little wolf is just so ughh I wanna punch him

. ATHENA

. FIGHT BACK

. BAHAHAHA UPPERCUT?

. QUICK THOUGHT

. And he👏is👏a 👏bully👏

. SHOW HIM

. ATHENA IS SO COOL

. OMG OMG

. Her voice is stunning

. The animatics are gonna go so hard

. Awww

. Oh he lost??

. Telemachus:((

. I mean yeah why did she come to your aid?

We'll be fine

. We only got Teleys bit so I'm excited

. Oo start with Athena

. FRIEND??

. Don't make me cry

. "He was a lot like you" gee I wonder why

. GREW APART :((

. HIS LIGHT!!

. GLORIOUS VOICE

. WAITT THEY CHANGED IT

. "Or if hes worth the hype but" > " I don't know what he's like"

. Fair enough

. And they changed "Cuz I got in a fight, sailed to an island when I've never left home shores"

. Okay it's been less than 5 minutes please refrain on the whole "friend" thing rn lol

. God telemachus voice (I can't shut up they're such good singers"

. DUET!!!!

. YOU WILL BE FINE

. Kid? Is he twenty or 12 I can't tell

Love in paradise

. FUCK YES

. WAIT THE INTRO?

. THEY WERE AT SEA FOR 10 YEARS, damn

. THE MUSIC SOARING, IT'S SO COOL, ouch

. CALYPSO MY LOVE (only the epic version though) [Ik it's up to interpretation but for me she doesn't sa him in this version]

. She's my wife 🙂 anyway 🤨

. HELL NO

. Oh shit love in paradise is athena watching, not Odysseus's experience

. Like this is when they first met and Calypso and Odysseus have been together for 7 years

. 7 YEARS

. YEAH I SAID THAT, before the song did

. ODYSSEUS!!

. WHAT > THE LEDGE

. ODYSSEUS 😭😭😭😭

. Wtf I am not emotionally stable enough for this

. Open..... arms.. BRO

. HIS MUM, POLITES AND EURY AND PENELOPE AND ATHENA??? BROO 😢

. YEAH I THINK HE DOES NEED HELP UGH

God games

. Ooo very grand

. Athena get him PLEASE

. She's about that business

. YES GOD GAMES INTRO OMGG

. WAIT WERE GONNA HEAR APOLLO AND HEAPHESTUS I'M SO EXCITED

. THE LITTLE MUSIC CHANEGS ARE SO GOOD

. ZEUS VOICE IS SO AMASZNIGN

. "and me" 😎

. That is not how I thought Apollo would sound

. He's batting for the sirens?? Um Ig that makes sense

. Oh Heaphestus I totally thought that aphrodite was next

. Well she's level 3 anyway

. BRO HIS DAD VOICES HEAPHESTUS I LOVE THAT

. Wait Apollo and Heaphestus are very reasonable, good for them

. NOW THE ONE WE'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR (excluding Hera)

. OMG IT'S THE SNIPPET THAT'S THE FINAL

. Athena's voice is new?

. Hmm she rerecorded but they didn't

. DIDN'T EVEN TRY TO KILL HER

. Don't fuck with Telemachus in front of Athena

. "Ughh release him"

. HERA

. OH FUCK SHE'S PERFECT CMON

. RELEASE HIM

. ZEUS YOU DICKHEAD SHE'S THE GODESS OF WISDOM LITERALLY ONLY HER COULD BEAT YOUR GAME

. WHAT WHAT

. NO

. WHAT???

. WHAT'S going on

. The music is telling me she like survived whatever his ambush was

. Zeus....

.THATS THE END WHATT

[ushys]

⸻ still with you. (nagi seishiro x reader)

a/n: where my blue lock fandom at omg 😢 it was raining really hard from where i’m from and i was listening to “still with you” by jungkook and i was reminded of nagi for some reason so why not write a cute one-shot ! it’s short ik i’m sorry 😞

you were on your way back to your apartment after clocking out of your part time job. the sky was grey due to all these clouds and it was also heavily raining. you were exhausted, and all you wanted to do was go home, take a shower, lay down and sleep. you’ve been losing sleep these past few days because of school, your job, and other things. you just wanted a break.

as you arrived infront of your apartment door, you heard some noise inside of your apartment. ‘what the hell?’ you questioned in your mind, wondering what could possibly be happening in there. you quickly unlocked your door and entered only to see nagi on your couch playing with his phone.

“nagi? what are you doing here?” you questioned as you took off your drenched coat and hung it up on the coat hanger. “i came here and waited for you to arrive.” he said, his eyes not leaving the screen.

“you know you could’ve given me a warning before coming in to my house” “you were the one that gave me the key to your house.” “..fair enough.” you sighed as you plopped down on the space next to him. he looked up from his screen to look at you. you had your eyes closed, head back, and he could obviously tell you were stressed.

“..are you okay?” he asked, setting his phone down and removing the blanket on top of his head. “yeah, i guess” you lied as you slowly open your eyes to look at him. “you’re lying.” “i’m not i swear.” “tell me what’s wrong.” you sighed and brought your head up to look at him more clearly. “there’s a lot of things that have been stressing me out lately and it just seems like i can’t catch a break.” you sighed as you put a hand on your forehead, rubbing it.

“well it’s not like that matters, just gotta finish with school, finish my shifts and everything will be fine for a bit” you said as you got up and looked back at him. “i’ll be back, i’m going to go take a quick shower, my back hurts.” you walked away as nagi just stared at you. “oh.”

after your warm shower, you got out and did everything you usually did post-shower. you put on some comfy clothes and went outside of the bathroom just to see the lights turned off, a pillow and blanket fort facing the window. the only sounds you could hear is the rain outside of the window, and nagi.. humming?

“nagi? what’s all this?” you asked as you looked inside of the fort. it has snacks, a computer, a speaker, and of course pillows and blankets. “this isn’t much, but i thought this would be a nice way to spend time and forget about everything worrying you right now. it’s not bad to have fun here and there is it?” he says as he goes in the fort and sits down. he looks up at you and pats the spot next to him, motioning you to come sit next to him.

you smiled, and sat down next to him as he picked up the speaker, “what song should i play right now?” he asks as he opens the computer and turns on the speaker, connecting the speaker to the computer.

“my friend recommended a song but i haven’t listened to it yet. it’s called ‘still with you’ by jungkook i think?” you said as you looked at nagi put spotify on the computer and typed out the song name.

the song started playing and you just listening to it while closing your eyes, not knowing nagi was looking at you with a content smile. you didn’t even notice you put your head on his shoulder. “nagi.” “yeah?” “i love you.” his eyes widened and his mouth opened a little, in a state of shock.

he turned around and looked at the rain outside of your window and replied with “..i love you too y/n” you felt your face heat up as the fact that he said it back and with your name. something about him adding your name to it made your stomach have butterflies. you knew nagi wasn’t the type to be extremely affectionate towards you because he just wasn’t used to being in a relationship with someone, so when he does show affection you know you should treasure it forever.

“nagi?”

“yeah?”

“hop on roblox.”

he’s so cute bye.

[avianyuh]

hello<3 can u do one where Haechan is working with the reader ( his noona, his celebrity crush ) for a new E.P together so they spend a lot of time, and get to know each other, were seen having dinner together, going out and both start to develop feelings, and fans make theories and rumors about them until it´s confirmed.

thanks ( ik it´s a lot) <3 <3 <3 <3

Studio Sessions; Lee Donghyuck/Haechan

When SM secured a collaboration between Haechan and Y/n for a solo project outside of NCT, Haechan was more than excited, mainly for two reasons. One, being that this E.P was a huge opportunity for him and two, he had always had a bit of a crush on Y/n. He was a fan of her as an artist and had always wanted to meet her. 

But Haechan would be lying if he didn’t admit that at just the thought of her, his heartbeat  starts to race. Which might have been a problem since the time booked in the studio was for one week. His main goal was to put the work first and try to conceal his feelings, he figured he’d do fine, just focus on the singing. Nothing was going to amount from this other than a few great songs right? 

So on the first day of studio sessions, Haechan was sitting with the rest of the staff, waiting to introduce himself to Y/n. He skimmed the lyrics as he looked down at the piece of paper in his hand to kill some time. And frankly, to calm his nerves. But when he heard the door click open, he was pulled away from the paper and immediately stood up. As Y/n walked in, he bowed, giving his greetings. He felt his face get hot as he stared at her. Y/n greeted him back and sat down in the chair next to him. 

“So, Haechan, did you get a chance to read over the lyrics?”,Y/n questioned as she waved to some staff members who walked in after her. Haechan smiled as he helped up the piece of paper and shyly responded back with a ‘Yes’. “Is there anything you want to change before we start recording?”,Y/n asked again as she herself looked down at a sheet one of her staff members gave her. 

“I’m fine with whatever you want.”, Haechan responded before quickly adding on, “I trust you!” To this, Y/n laughed. The two of them made eye contact and both would be lying if they didn’t admit that there seemed to be some sort of spark for a second. But it could’ve just been some sort of professional chemistry, at least that’s what Haechan told himself. 

After a few hours, they had a few different takes and recordings that the producers and engineers were happy with. But by this point, the two would have to do a duet, which required both of them to be in the booth. 

So there they were, in the dimly lit, cramped booth. When just one person’s in it, the booth seemed so spacious, so it was quite ironic that they were hunched together, shoulder to shoulder. Over the last few hours the two had grown quite close. Haechan was cracking jokes, Y/n was laughing and doing the same. He had even confessed that he had known almost all of Y/n’s songs by heart, which she found endearing. So as they started singing together, specifically a love song duet, maybe it was the atmosphere or the fact that they were standing so close together. Most likely, it was the eye contact that sealed the deal. By the end of the studio session they left looking forward to the next day in the studio. 

Over the next week, the two of them grew really close. And things became less platonic and more flirtatious. So when they started going out after the studio sessions for coffee or out to restaurants, it got to a point that they both couldn’t deny the chemistry, which was no longer professional. 

Both Haechan and Y/n decided to keep things underwraps, since it would cause problems for the E.P and their careers. So they continued to go out for coffee and walks around the city, and eventually the E.P was released, which ended up being a successful release that unbeknownst the Haechan and Y/n, was drawing eyes to them. So when pictures were leaked of the two out on one of their dates, fans started talking. Digging up old interviews to show that Haechan had mentioned Y/n, looking at what they had both said in the past regarding ideal types and trying to see if they matched them. This went on for about a month, where more pictures of them were leaked and fans would take the photos and run with it. 

And eventually, both of their companies gave in and decided to address it by confirming it since it got to a point where it was too hard to deny. 

After that, they went back to laying low, just to play it safe but from that point forward, that E.P would be known as one of the greatest collaborations that turned into a full fledged relationship. 

[A/N: Here you go anon! I hope you like it🙏]

[milesandcorysupermacy]

can you do a fic we’re y/n is miles(doesn’t matter which one) little sister who can lowkey sing but denies it

HEEEEEY, POOKIE! So ik I took long to answer ur request but u inspired me to write again because I can actually relate to this 😭

---------------x-o-x-o--------------------------

"Mariposa"

1610!Miles x Younger-SISTER-Reader

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Warnings: Cursing, Reader is 13, Miles is 15, Me not knowing anthing about the music industry, Not spell checked bc im lazy, Reader recorded without her consent (it'll make sense, I promise 😭)

Songs that were used: 'In Your Hands' By Halle, and 'Hailey's Comet' By Billie Eilish

Summary: You've always thought you could sing well, but you never considered it was exceptionally well. When you're confronted with other people's opinions on your singing, you start to change your mind. Can you really sing?

Taglist:

@we-loveebony

@im-miss-simp

@ilovespiderverseee

@maxoloqy

@edgyficuselastica

@thehighlordishere

---------------------x-o-x-o---------------------

You walked into your kitchen, humming the soft melodies of the Billie Eilish song playing in your shared airpod with your older brother, Miles.

"Hey, you wanna order tacos? Your treat, by the way."

You turn to him, confused from this comment since he usually pays. You hate to admit anything nice about him, but one thing you can say is...he's a gentleman.

"Why am I paying?"

"Oh, I dunno. Maybe this will jog your memory."

Your over-dramatic sibling says as he points to a scar on his left cheek. You sheepishly chuckle as you scratch the back of your neck, embarrassed. The scar he's referring to is from two days ago when you threw scissors at him.

"Oh, right. In my defense, I thought your spidey senses would make you catch it."

Miles gasped.

"HOW?!?!!? I was holding sketches! If you thought I would drop my precious babies for some scissors...you clearly don't know me, mother's other child."

He said, not referring to you by name anymore. You rolled your eyes as you threatened him with the worst thing of all...no food.

"Well, if you're not even referring to me by name anymore, I guess you don't want any tacos!"

Miles immediately frowned, gasping from your threat.

"No! I love you my most beautiful, sweet, elegant sister! I still want the tacos! Make mine carne asada, please!"

You rolled your eyes at his willingness to switch up so easily. You sighed, opening your Uber Eats app to find the closest taco place.

"What a drag to love you like I do, ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh"

You sang quietly along to the infectious melodies of Billie Eilish's 'Hailey's Comet'. Miles just stared at you, stunned. He's never heard you sing unless you were joking around, but right now he could've sworn you were a Grammy-nominated artist. He let this keep going on until the song ended, still staring at you while you absent-mindedly look into your phone. Not noticing him staring daggers into the side of your face.

"Ok, I placed the orde-"

"You sounded really good just now, why didn't you tell anyone you could sing like that?"

You stared at him bug-eyed, not knowing how to respond to all this sudden attention on you. Being the younger sister of Miles Morales, you just kinda got used to flying under his radar. I mean, he's a *almost* Straight A student, exceptionally good at art, a superhero, and he's in one of the most prestigious schools in Brooklyn. How could you even compete with that?

You're just a 13 year old girl who passes all her classes to keep her and her parents sane, and pretty much nothing after that. You acknowledged this hidden talent, but immediately compared yourself to other singers and realized that you would get crushed in that audition room. You weren't some Beyonce waiting to happen, you were just a girl. A girl who has absolutely no idea what she's doing.

"Why? What do you mean why, Miles? Have you heard all the other singers out there? Dude, I would get fucking crushed the moment I let out the first note. Not just that, but you're so obviously mom and dad's favorite. I mean, every time I come home with a B I feel like an idiot compared to you. You're just better than me, and everyone knows it. I fly under your radar, Miles. Every time that you, mom, or dad introduce me to somebody, you guys always say Miles' little sister. Face it, dude. I can't compare to you."

Miles felt his heart shatter hearing your words. As a big brother, his job was to protect you. How could he do that when he was causing the problem himself? He never looked down on you, he was proud to have you as a sister and he couldn't believe that you felt this way about yourself. What made it even worse was the fact that you started crying, he immediately sprung into action when he saw the tears falling. He engulfed you in a hug, feeling extremely guilty.

"I'm so sorry, Mariposa. I never even realized that the family was downplaying you like this, you're incredible and deserve to be seen as such."

You felt a smirk coming onto your lips from the nickname that he called you, referring to your Halloween costume from 10 years ago. Small moments like this made you realize that you had a brother who loved you, and would talk to you about anything. That's all that matters, right? You and him against the world...well, maybe just him. (Give the man credit, he's literally spiderman.)

"It's fine, I'm sorry to drop all of this on you. I feel like I kinda overreacted."

You awkwardly chuckled as Miles look at you like you were a woman gone mad.

"Why are you sorry? I'm glad you brung it up, now I can be more aware whenever I see it happen again. The fact that you feel like you're always under my radar is even more of a reason to get yourself out there! Who knows, I mean maybe Mami and Dad could hire you a manager. We're in New York, this IS industry city."

You thought about the idea for a second and honestly, it sounded great at first. Then you started to realize that you were 13, about to graduate 8th grade, and have no experience in vocal training. The once great idea started to sound like a complete fail.

"While I appreciate your excitement, Miles. I'm barely a high schooler, and have no experience. If I were to make it in the industry, it be pure luck!"

You waved him off as he was walking around you in a circle, spewing ideas. Starting to become annoyed with how invested he truly is in your life, a blessing and a curse.

"Well maybe if we go to the mall and-"

"What? No, that's so idiotic."

"Well, if you can open for an artist's tour-"

"How am I gonna do that with my middle class, Afro-Hispanic family in Brooklyn, New York?"

"Well, I got a few piggy bank-"

Miles was thankfully interrupted by a notification from your phone saying that the tacos were downstairs at the front desk.

"Thank fuck."

You whispered as the notification saved you from hearing any more of Miles' idiotic ideas.

"Miles, you mind going to get it?"

"Yea, just gimme a sec."

He says as he puts his shoes on, but that's really just a cover for his plan. He decided to play one of your favorite songs right now, 'In Your Hands'. He did this since he knew you wouldn't be able to resist singing it, especially since nobody else is around. While he's downstairs, he left his phone recording in the apartment so that he could catch your angelic voice and show it to his parents. Great plan....well, at least he hopes so.

~Timeskip~

While you and Miles play Wii Bowling on the living room TV, (you were beating his ass btw) your parents walk in. You both greet them and help with groceries, you then decide that you wanted to take a shower and exit the room. This gives Miles time to execute his plan!

(We're gonna pan over to Miles' scene bc I'm not. writing about you taking a boring ass shower.)

"Ok, we have like 40 mins until she's done with her nightly routine."

Miles says very suspiciously which causes his parents to feel concerned about him.

"Miles, buddy. You alright? I hope you're not sick or anything."

Jeff says as he cautiously touches Miles' forehead. His mother begins to chime in with the concern too.

"Yeah, you do look kinda pale."

Rio says, also touching the poor boy's face.

"He does, doesn't he? I'm glad I wasn't the only one noticing-"

"I'm not pale, I'm very pigmented!"

Miles whisper shouts. His parents back off with their hands up in a surrendering motion.

"Anyway, I wanted to show you guys a video of Y/N that I took. I know it sounds weird, but it's a video of her singing. It sounds really nice and I want her to have a talent of her own since everyone compares us."

His parents smile with approval and appreciation of how nice your brother was being towards you right now.

"Well, show us whatcha got!"

Rio says, enthusiastically. Miles opens his camera app and plays the video, immediately smiling at your perfect voice as you sing the melodic notes of the song.

"In your Hands, in your hands.

You can't let go or you'll lose your chance.

'Cause after me, you'll never fall in love again, la-la-la."

You melodically sung along to the song ans your parents stared at the phone with shock. They listened to the whole 3 minute video and smiled the whole way through, stunned by your almost perfect vocals.

"Wow...I can't believe that's my baby girl singing!"

Rio said, bewildered.

After some time, you finally walk out the bathroom with your pajamas and a towel on your head. Your family just stared at you with shock as you walked toward the kitchen for water.

"What? Am I not supposed to drink this water or something?"

"Girl, where'd you learn to sing like that?"

You furrowed your eyebrows at your dad, believing he's truly lost it this time.

"What are you talking about?"

Miles smiled cheekily at you as he played the video of your singing. You immediately grew embarrassed as you felt your face heat up and eyes widen.

"Miles, I'll kill you!"

You shouted as you charged towards your older brother who hid behind his mom.

"Baby, this is great! We signed you up for vocal lessons and even got you a meeting with a manager tomorrow, that's...if you say yes, of course."

Your mom trailed off.

"You better say yes, this stuff wasn't cheap!"

Jeff complained as your mom shot him a glare.

"Fine, I'll do it."

You said as you smiled from your families interest in you and your interests. You and your family conversed on some logistics and commitments that you will have to make for this newfound hobby. With that, there was just one more question to ask...

"So, what will your artist name be? We need a name to put on the email to the record label."

You looked up at your older brother and smiled before saying...

"Mariposa."

-------------------☆-☆-☆-☆-------------------

THIS IS ITTT 🤑🤑

The first post after my lil hiatus 🤧

Anyway, I hope yall liked it and thanks to the anon who sent this, ima answer the other request I got too!

💞💞

[cherryyan49]

stay with me

an isaacwhy fic

she/her prns, uses of [name]

kinda based on the song:stay with me by miki matsubara

a/n:hii! I'm back with a slightly different vibe fic, finally smth not besties to lovers ik ik. it will be returning I'm just saying c: anyways this is just a comfort type fic, so basically all fluff so enjoy <33

* . °•★

It was rather quiet in [name's] apartment. The sun was setting, allowing the golden colors to seep through the windows, filling the room. Numerous candles were lit as she sat on her couch waiting for a text from her boyfriend. She had known Isaac, her lover, for years before realizing she was in love with him. It started out sweet and soft, marking just over six months with the label. The relationship is still soft, but you can most definitely tell you're comfortable with each other. She was bored and felt like seeing him despite him coming over just a few days ago. You looked around your living room, spotting the fresh Statice flowers he had gifted you one night. A soft smile formed on your face, glancing over at your phone from a buzz.

'I'm on my way, and we're gonna go for a little adventure, hope you're up for it :3 I'll be there in ten <3' -isaac

The girl giggled to herself, and blew out each candle around her place to get it ready. No matter how many times they've seen each other, it still sends her heart racing.

After what felt like an eternity, a knock was heard on her front door. Immediately opening it, Isaac's arms were found right around her, melting in her touch. It felt so intoxicating to him, yet not bothersome. Letting go, you had invited him in, wanting to ask where the two of you were going this lovely evening.

"It's a surprise, but it's something you love. Aside from me, obviously," he teased dramatically.

Teasing the girl was something Isaac took much pride in, to see her reactions, to see just how she'd respond to loving him. No matter how many months pass, he still cannot get over the fact that he's with you. After fighting with himself, and finding himself longing at her and everything she did, he's finally with her. Isaac can't help but smile and tease when he's with the girl, he's in fact still swooned as if it's day one.

In response [name] rolled her eyes playfully. Just because you're together does not mean you don't banter with one another, but she took the latter's word as she walked up to him. Grabbing his hands softly, she placed a gentle kiss on them and Isaac couldn't help but feel weak in the knees. How can this girl, still, have an effect on him? He giggled softly, grabbing her hands back and leading her out the door they were once at.

➶ ｡˚ °

The two of you were in his car as Isaac refused to let you get the aux on this lovely evening. He had a specific idea in mind, japanese city pop, despite her fussing she was about to play that. Isaac smiled widely and playfully winked in response at the girl in his passenger side of his car. The melodic songs played softly, filling up the car as Isaac drove to his very secret location. That was until someone wanted to banter with him once more,

"What if I recognize where we're going?," [Name] questioned as she looked out the window, trying to get something out of the guy.

But he refused to budge, "Nuh uh, if you do, just um," he paused, "–close your eyes?"

The girl laughed, causing Isaac to softly grin to himself. She shook her head but complied with the latter, and decided to push him just a bit further.

"What if I don't wanna close my eyes, mr. why?"

"Baby, I will turn this car around and take myself on this date instead," he threw his head to the side to stare at her briefly. You couldn't help but giggle proudly at your work of pushing his buttons, not in a serious way of course.

The sun was settling down more than earlier as you've reached atop a grassy empty hill. Your eyes lit up and immediately looked towards Isaac, who's finding a place to park. The area is filled with trees and beautiful greenery, looking over a majority of the city. The sight was breathtaking, making it one of your favorite spots to decompress. 

Isaac turned the music up as he rolled down all the windows so that they could enjoy a little something while sitting outside.

[Name] got out of the car and leaned on the hood of it. Joining her, Isaac pulled his girlfriend closer towards him, snaking his right arm around her waist. The atmosphere was calm and quiet, with the music softly playing as you watched the sky's color fade and bleed into one another.

"It's been so long since I've watched the sunset, Isaac" you said while taking his hand into your own.

Isaac smiled gently, "I know and I thought maybe you'd like to see it again, for fun, and with me," he replied just above a whisper. The air felt so intimate between the two of them, so surreal. [Name] leaned back to face him while smiling sweetly.

"Thank you love," she leaned back in and gave him a kiss. It was a gentle, sweet kiss, to show her appreciation for the idea. And Isaac ate every bit of it up. He loved doing things with you, simply being in the same room gives him all the joy in the world. But being sat next to you, in this atmosphere, doing something you love, made him fall twice as hard as he was before. He couldn't stop himself from smiling when he was around you as he smiled into the kiss, and placed his forehead on yours before placing a light kiss on it as well. Isaac’s eyes lingered on the way the pinks and oranges reflected on your skin, basking in the welcoming sun. If he knew that the golden hues complimented you so well, he would have done this ages ago.

Not to mention how he looks as well. His eyes were glittered and the sun rays bounced off of his brown curly hair, causing a slight blush to appear across your face. His choice of outfit didn't make the situation any better as he wore a black tank with a black short sleeved button up, opened, over it. It was one of his best fits, in your humble opinion. His skin was kissed by the setting sun, and god was he something. [Name] laid her head on Isaac's shoulder, breathing in deeply as his hands played with the hem of your shirt. Giggles were shared between the two of them, along with quiet confessions and lingering touches.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

As the sky began to darken, you got up and offered your hand out towards Isaac. Confused, he takes it and you start playfully dancing with him. Getting the hint, Isaac giggled and spun her around. Stay with me played aloud in the background as the two of you messed around. Isaac couldn't help but softly laugh as he enjoyed every second of this, dancing like you're the only ones in the world. Normally, he wouldn't be keen on dancing, especially if anyone saw, but he loved it with a certain someone. She made him feel alive in a sense, the same way he made her feel. It felt so cliché and silly, but it warmed your heart hearing him enjoy himself.

You snuck a laugh when Isaac began to sing dramatically as he swung his hips slowly with the song. It was ridiculous but it was a sight to see. He grabbed your left hand, spinning then dipping you smoothly with your free hand landing on his chest. His face was barely two inches over yours, as a rosy tint spread across his cheeks as he smiled. There was a brief pause in time, that's what it felt like at least, before he gently kissed her. It was rather more passionate than before, but it was endearing–until his stomach rumbled causing her to giggle.

"Someone's hungry," she teased as she fumbled her phone to check what time it was.

"Uh no, I'm Isaac," he joked as he was embarrassed, gaining a look in response.

"That was lame, come on I'm also hungry," she grimaced teasingly.

"Lame or not you loved it," he teased back, pointing his finger at her. 

"Oh be quiet, I'll leave you here to starve," she laughed as she pushed him into the car. Isaac laughed with her, waiting to see what else the night held for them.

*☆•° . *

a/n: I had fun writing this ngl, thought I would give yall a nice lil break from my usual. I'm not too sure how I like this style, but thought I'd try it out :P anyway I hope yall enjoyed <3

[cialovesklopp]

𝐏𝐎𝐕 | k. mbappé

𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 — where advices from close people lead to the final reunion between two lovers who are already destined in the stars to be together

𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 — kylian mbappé x amara imani (oc)

𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕 — 7.5k

𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒈𝒔 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 — pov [ariana grande]

𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓'𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆 — we've finally made it. after this chapter the revenge era officially begins mixed with a lot of kylian and amara. i can't wait to start writing the next chapter but those will vary sometimes in format and style

taglist: @lorarri @locedes @aechii

masterlist

mama always knew best — amara doesn’t think she had ever heard truer words. 

somehow the minute taraji imani had entered the parisian apartment, she sensed the change on her daughter. it started with the apartment where between the smell of cinnamon and vanilla, she also picked up faints of a manly perfume. the hoodie that was thrown over the white couch was her next clue because she instantly remarked that it did not belong to her daughter. she wasn’t saying this in a way of proving she was very controlling but instead the size of the hoodie made it clear that it was not amara’s.

the biggest clue though was her daughter herself. the moment the door had been opened and she had faced amara, she could see that something was different. the last time amara had seen her parents, it had been with tears rolling down her face, dull, swollen eyes from all the crying and forced smiles — a clear contrast to what taraji had been met with now. amara had a soft smile on her face when she had let her mother enter the apartment, no sign of any tear or make-up to, perhaps even cover eye rings or any swelling. 

taraji’s eyes travelled over the apartment since it was her first time she had visited her daughter in paris. the apartment itself was beautiful, she had to admit. the beige decor along with the simplistic and modern decor gave the apartment a feel of comfort that spread the minute one stepped in. 

“you cannot tell me that you did this yourself,” she exclaimed, a sharp look of scepticism sent into amara’s direction. 

“mama, i did this all by myself with some help of liyah and grace when they weren’t busy.” she explained, smiling cheekily.

“well, it looks good. i’m proud of you.” her mother replied, sitting down on the couch. amara took place on the small armchair opposed to her, grabbing her phone, pen and song-notebook. “so tell me now, what have you been planning? the last time we spoke, you told me you had a project going.”

taraji noticed the change even more when a sudden excited expression appeared on her daughter’s face just at the mention of the planned project.

“i am working on some songs. i’m ready to go back into the spotlight again, i had my time and rest but like you said. i need healing from all this. ma ị mara m, usoro ọgwụgwọ m gụnyere ide abụ na hapụ mmetụta m.” — and you know me, my healing process consists of writing songs and release my feelings

“is that why you’re glowing so positively and shining?” her mother exclaimed, eyes sparkling with delight. it warmed her heart to see her daughter so alive and spirited again, remembering the way she had looked like the last time. a walking corpse. now she was spreading life and vividness.

amara tried to hide her smile, managing to chuckle at least. “what exactly are you taking about?” she questioned her mother confusingly. 

"elela m anya otú ahụ. enwere m ike ịhụ mgbanwe nke ọma." — don't look at me like that. i can clearly see a change

the laugh that escaped amara’s laugh was enough to prove her mother’s statement. taraji had no idea of the feeling of joy that surged in her heart. 

amara waved dismissively. “let’s just say, paris has been good to me and allowed me to make the significant changes that were necessary. and it also gave me inspiration.”

her mother’s eyes sparkled with curiosity. she watched as amara scribbled down in her notebook, face scrunching up in concentration as she wrote down some words. she was also able to see the sparkle that had been lit again — the very thing that had helped her become herself. 

“i am just glad that this Phase with evan is over. i never really liked that guy.” she muttered under her breath, her distaste and disgust clear in her voice. 

“should’ve listened to you,” she replied nonchalantly, shrugging. “i finally saw his true colours, just sad that it took me nearly two years.”

“weren’t you friends with the new girl he’s dating?”

“kaia gerber?” she inquired, arching an eyebrow. “nope. we met once, at a fashion show and talked but we weren’t friends. i’m happy she’s dating him, maybe two nepo babies will cancel each other out.”

she put her notebook down and stood up, walking towards the kitchen. “i made chocolate cake knowing you love it so much. do want a piece now or later?”

“is it with chocolate pieces?” her mother asked to which amara nodded, “then yes please, a piece would be nice, ada.”

she entered the kitchen, coming out a few minutes later with two pieces of homemade chocolate cake. as she sat down, the vibration of her phone made her look up, especially because it was the one she had programmed to ring when kylian texted her. 

just at the thought of him, a smile plastered on her face which did not go unnoticed by taraji. her smile widened even more as she read the french’s strikers message, grinning widely. 

“so this is why you’re so happy lately i assume?” her mother inquired, smirking slyly at her daughter. 

as if she was caught at a crime scene, amara rapidly put down her phone, staring at her mother.  “amaghị m ihe ị na-ekwu” — i do not know what you’re talking about

“ị chere na a mụrụ m ụnyaahụ?” she retorted incredulously at amara’s attempt to lie. “m na-amụkwa ọnụ ọchị otú ahụ n'ihi nna gị” — do you think I was born yesterday? — i used to smile like that because of your father

amara rolled her eyes, still grinning. “i will admit that there is someone but i can guarantee you there is nothing going on between us. we’re taking it slow.”

“taking it slow?” taraji asked, arching an eyebrow. 

“yes. mainly because i am not ready to move forward yet with all this drama going around.”

her mother's eyes softened, filled with both empathy and relief. “it is already a step forward that you know your feelings about yourself. but sweetheart, if you like him, go for him. love doesn’t mean marriage directly. you have time, ada to work things out. if he is able to instantly make you smile like that, he must be someone important.”

“i do feel a lot for him but i don’t want to rush into anything. but i like him. a lot. probably the best thing in paris.” she confessed, smiling shyly. 

seeing amara like that made taraji’s heart warm. her daughter was truly in love, even a blind man could see that. the shy smiles were all that the nigerian mother needed to realize that her daughter was in deep. 

the two had always been close. even though amara had a special bond with her father, created through watching football and formula 1 together, her mother had always stayed her best friend. especially because taraji had been so young when she had had amara. no one knew her better than her mother, was able to read her like her mother. she would always stay her favourite person. 

“i am so proud of you. you deserve someone who cherishes you and respects you. who doesn’t put you first but lets you stay there... and i have a feeling this one might be the one for you.” taraji added when she saw amara grin at her phone again. 

“i hope he’s the one too.” she muttered, losing herself in her notebook and thoughts as she listened to her mother. 

she wasn’t as productive with the impending album as she had hoped with her mother visiting but she was still determined to finish the songs and at least have some work done that she could be proud of at the end of the day. 

on the other side, kylian wasn’t any better. while usually his mind was focused clearly on correcting his mistakes from their latest match and getting better, this time all his thoughts circled around amara. stretching his arms, the french striker walked out the changing rooms, rejoining his team mates on the field. he was still smiling when he joined the group of his teammates that were wearing orange tees, his mind still thinking about the conversation he just had with amara. and it didn’t go unnoticed by his teammates. 

“oh kylian,” presnel called him, ripping him out of his thoughts. “what’s got you smiling like that?” he questioned his friend, the others all looking at him expectantly. 

startled, kylian turned to his teammate, grinning from ear to ear. “nothing. arrête de t’imaginer des choses.” he replied playfully, shrugging off their curiosity. — stop imagining things

“ca fait quand même longtemps qu’on t’a plus vu comme ça.” presnel pressed on the top. he playfully put an arm on kylian’s shoulder, “come on, you can tell tonton presko everything.” — but it’s been some time that we haven’t seen you like this

kylian laughed, shrugging his teammate’s arm off and grabbed a ball, starting with the exercises they were ordered to do.

however he couldn’t escape everyone. he had been able to dodge presnel, marco and hakimi but neymar wouldn’t make it that easy for him. the brazilian star found his opportunity to lead his own interrogation during a pair exercise, where he immediately partnered with kylian. a mischievous sparkle in his eye, he asked his friend, “so… now wanna tell me what made you smile like that?”

“i already told presnel that there —“ 

he instantly cut him off, raising his eyebrow in scepticism. “cut the bullshit kyky. maybe you can lie to them but you can’t lie to me. so tell me the reason for your constant good mood.”

catching neymar’s gaze, he knew he was right so kylian decided that confiding into one person wouldn’t hurt much. “well, there is someone but we’re only friends.” he confessed, adding the last part quickly when he saw neymar’s smirk. 

“just friends?” he inquired. 

“yes, for the moment we’re just friends. but even if i wanted something more, i already told her i would wait till she was ready for more.” he revealed in hushed tones. “but don’t you dare tell a soul or i’ll sell you,” kylian threatened him jokingly, referring to the rumour that had been going on where he had apparently had the intention of selling his best friend. 

rolling his eyes, he brazilian nr. 10 replied dismissively. “don’t worry about that bro. i got your back. now tell me more and why did you promise her, you’d wait.”

kylian sighed, passing him the ball lightly to at least act as if they were doing some work. “we’ve known each other now for a few months but whenever we go one step forward, she somehow takes three steps back the next time. and i have nothing against waiting but i just want to know where we truly stand. the mixed signals are confusing me.” he revealed, in addition to his confession that her presence was the best thing in those past months. 

“is she some kind of virgin and this is her first relationship or what do you mean by steps forward?” neymar asked him after having listened intently. 

he shook his hand, a sharp glare sent into his friend’s direction. “she just came from a relationship that, let’s say, did not end so good. in fact, it was terrible and she is still fixing some things but also the fact that she’s very insecure now. it kind of makes all this complicated.” 

“in that case, what you need to do is talk to her. how often do you speak or see her?”

“three to four times a week but we text each other nearly everyday except when she’s busy.”

“there you have it. text her and talk to her about it. not that you want to move forward but that you want to know where you stand. but still, you’ll have to give her time and not rush her if you’re saying that she’s still so fragile.” he advised, patting him on the back. “has she already opened up?” kylian nodded, making a grin appear on his friend’s face. “there you have it. she’s ready for a step forward and maybe a relationship with you. just let time do it’s thing.”

keeping neymar’s advice in mind, kylian focused again on training, finishing the exercises they told to do. he was grateful for the advice he had been giving, realizing that pressuring her wouldn’t help either. he would’ve asked her earlier how exactly things stood between them but she had practically refused to see him yesterday, knowing they had come back late from their away match. but he had to see her today. 

after finishing his shower and getting dressed, the french striker grabbed his phone, impatient to call her. he changed his mind though, deciding to text her instead of calling as he still wanted to keep amara to himself. he wasn’t ready to share her with his world yet. 

𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐄:

𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐍: finished with training can i come over?

𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐀:  yeah pls actually wanted to ask you if you wanted to but forgot

𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐍:  of course how could i forget that amara imani is a busy woman

𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐀: don’t make me block you anyway i have a surprise for u so you should definitely come

𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐍:  on my way

a wide smile formed on his lips as he read her message. he grabbed his back and bid his friends goodbye, not missing the wink neymar had sent him as he made his way over to amara. the woman that would be the death of him. but if he died, he'd at least die a happy man.

a feeling of deep comfort spread through the room when amara lit some cinnamon candles and placed them on the coffee table in front of her. the talk with her mother felt good, the feeling of having someone who always supported her. words couldn’t describe her luck. she sat down on the couch, enjoying her moment of comfort and peace. 

from the kitchen out, she was able to smell the chocolate cake and apple tart she had just baked. the latter had been for kylian who had just come back from an away match and had been a bit displeased and moody at the fact that amara couldn’t come see him. of course he had understood, knowing in which situation the singer found herself in but still he could not get himself to not be a bit disappointed about her lack of presence. text messages and calls could only replace that much. so amara had thought of surprising him with his favorite cake, not knowing that she would be the one to be surprised. 

sitting comfortably on the couch, she grabbed her phone, checking for any unread messages or missed calls. she had already finished talking with grace about her upcoming album. truthfully, in the beginning the idea had been to just release some songs but the more time she had spent with kylian the more inspiration she had gotten. in the end, she found herself with enough songs to make a whole album and after a lot of insisting from grace, who had also called liyah as back-up, amara had surrendered and agreed to make an album. now it was just a question of who would be on it and who wouldn’t. 

she pulled her legs close while closing the messenger app and opening a book she had recently started. her self-ordered quarantine had given her lots of time and she was bent on using it for things she hadn’t had much time for. next to painting and songwriting, reading was definitely on the list and she planned on making it her hobby again. indulging in the quiet and solitude she was experiencing currently, she made herself comfortable on the couch and rapidly started to read her book from the spot she had stopped the last time. 

she had lost track of time when the locks on the door turned and kylian entered the apartment, his sports bag hanging loosely on his shoulder. dressed in a white t-shirt, that practically made his ab lines visible for everyone and a pair of blue loose jeans, amara had difficulties to draw her eyes from his stomach. what stood out most though was the thing he was holding in his right hand, which he had pulled behind his back to hide whatever he had in hand. he put her house keys on the hooks, aligned at the wall before he finally entered the living room, where she was waiting patiently for him. 

immediately at the sight of her, his lips formed a curve, the two small dips making their appearance again and filling amara’s stomach with butterflies. “hey ky,” amara greeted him. standing up to hug the french striker, she pressed a soft kiss on his cheek, inhaling the scent she had grown so used to having around her. 

“salut ma belle,” he mumbled into her hair, pulling her closer. at the sound of her nickname, feelings of excitement rushed through her, still getting flustered whenever kylian used that name for her. originally, his nickname had firstly been ‘mara’ since her short name didn’t leave much creativity for nicknames but he had once called her ma belle and amara had had a shock reaction, spilling her drink on him. of course this had been so funny to him he had given her the name again and it had stuck much to her dismay. -- hello, my beautiful

“congratulations for the win,” she exclaimed happily. even though she hadn’t been at the match, she had watched it from her couch, cheering loudly when paris scored. “your goal was beautiful. i probably woke the neighbours with my screams.”

he laughed at her confession, knowing exactly what she must have looked like. after all, he had watched a liverpool game once with her and she had probably broken his eardrums whenever the reds had scored. “thanks. it’s a shame that my biggest supporter couldn’t come to see the goals live.”

amara rolled her eyes, knowing exactly what he was hinting at. “kylian, i already explained to you why i wasn’t able to come,” she objected, her voice still bright, “but i have a surprise for you.”

she turned, ready to go into the kitchen to get his cake but he grabbed her hand to stop her. looking at him with a confused expression, she watched as kylian held up his hand and then pulled out his right hand from his back, a huge bouquet of flowers appearing in his hand. the rose and white flowers were clearly a contrast to him but amara had never seen anything more beautiful than this. 

the confused expression was immediately exchanged, replaced by a soft one and made a smile appear on her face; a genuine one that only happened to come out when kylian was there. 

“omg, you didn’t have to,” amara gushed, happiness clear in her face. she happily accepted the bouquet of pink peonies and white lilies, a huge smile spreading on her face when she leaned down and smelled the scent of the flowers. “these are so beautiful.” 

“je savais que tu devrais les adorer.” he replied, matching amara’s enthusiasm. just seeing the way she smiled and was genuinely happy was able to put a smile on his face. but he also wondered what her relationship with evan must have truly been like if she was this happy for something that should be self-evident in a relationship. — i knew you’d love them

he probably would never know that this was the first time she had ever received flowers because someone had genuinely meant to get her some. amara always had to force evan to buy her some flowers and even then it had only been on valentines day as he deemed flowers as unnecessary. it was a shock for her that someone thought of her as important to bring her flowers. 

she delicately affirmed her grip around the bouquet, her eyes already looking for a spot where she could put the flowers and see them immediately. “where did you even get them?”

he waved dismissively. “i passed a flower shop on the way to you and saw them in the shop window. they reminded me of you so i had to get them.” he admitted, and again amara was glad, her skin colour made it impossible for her to blush. 

“why are you so perfect?” she asked rhetorically. grinning at him. “now my surprise is nothing compared to yours.” 

“anything you do is perfect in my eyes.” kylian assured her, lovestruck expression clear. “come on, tell me, what did you prepare?”

with a playful glint in her eyes, she grabbed his hand and led him to the kitchen. “close your eyes,” she ordered him, excitement clear in her voice. he did as ordered, his face scrunching up when he heard the sound of the refrigerator open and close and metal, whose sound resembles a lot to the one of a knife.  “you can open them now.”

kylian’s eyes opened and he was instantly faced by a grinning amara, where kylian feared her face would break soon from all the smiling and a cake in her hand, more specifically a pie and not just any pie. the apple pie he had seen once on tv at her apartment and had told amara, he would die to eat one. immediately, his confused expression changed, joining amara on her happy one. 

“you actually made me apple pie?”

she nodded happily, holding out a fork. “i tried my best to make it like the one on tv but i can’t guarantee anything.”

“now it’s my turn to say, you didn’t have to.” he replied, grinning. he took a bite of the cake, his senses exploding when the taste reached his tongue. originally, he hadn’t even liked the cake that much, he had just wanted to eat apple cake at that moment but now whatever he had seen on tv, it would never match hers. screw that, he would never ever eat another apple cake again if it wasn’t hers. 

amara shrugged dismissively. “you brought me my favorite wine and flowers and so many other things. consider this as something from me.”

again, kylian felt this unclear signal from her. what did she feel for him? was she ready to take this step forward or would they forever stay in this situation, this fine line between friendship and love. a line so thin, even kylian wasn’t able to differentiate between their friendship and feelings. he recalled his conversation with neymar, knowing that he couldn’t avoid talking to her about his feelings. 

“amara, you need to tell me where we stand.” he began. “you know i would wait for the world but i need to know where we stand. this is clearly not a friendship anymore but what exactly are we? where exactly are we moving?”

her heart fell as she listened to kylian. it had never been her intention to make him feel like that, she had thought it was clear that she wasn’t ready but still loved him. and yet, here he stood, asking after a clear statement from her because he was getting confused. 

would she tell him to continue to wait? continue to hide behind her fears and insecurities — if anything she should have learned by now that she didn’t have to be afraid of anything with kylian. maybe her mind still had some difficulties at accepting that kylian would not be like Evan but her heart certainly had not. 

since that night where they had talked for hours in the bathroom, it was clear that her heart beat for him. that he had somehow broken the shell of grief around it and had replaced it with a coat of fire. his fire, that protected her heart. 

truthfully, what was she waiting for, amara asked herself. grace, liyah, even her mother had advised her that men like him only came once in a lifetime. that she shouldn’t string him along. she recalled her mother’s word, “if you like him, go for him. love doesn’t mean marriage directly. you have time, ada.” — she was done hiding behind an invisible wall that had already too many cracks, 

she walked slowly towards him, kylian still looking at her with an expectant expression and grabbed his hands slowly, intertwining them which seemed to have taken him by surprise. 

“kylian,” amara whispered softly, her voice sounding faintly through the room. her eyes looked through his, losing themselves immediately in his dark brown irises, that could read amara better than herself sometimes. “i’m ready. i wanna take a path forward.” she told him under her breath, the distance between their faces lessening with every word she spoke. “but only if you want me.” 

time held still as the two lovers stared into each other’s eyes, losing themselves quickly in them and drawing out their surroundings. all that mattered, was the other. he had waited for this moment, patiently counted the time that she would need to heal. and he had been ready to wait even more after his talk with neymar. but nonetheless, he didn’t need to be asked twice to answer her question. 

his hand grabbed her face delicately, one hand on each cheek and he leaned down towards her face, close enough to her amara’s heartbeat quickening. his eyes wandered down from her brown, honey like eyes to her lips, his ears catching amara’s shaky yet composed breath. was he about to make a mistake? maybe. was it all worth it because he finally had the girl he loved? definitely. he knew that the moment, amara had moved her hands to his neck, to crane it and pull it down a bit because of their height difference, he just had to kiss her. 

and so he did. his lips briefly hovered over hers before he finally pressed his lips on hers. it was a soft kiss but full of tenderness, love and care that had built up during the growth of their relationship. her mind went blank at the sensations, hundred different thoughts and feelings rushing through her body. whatever she had felt the first time he had kissed her, even though it had only been on the cheek was intensified by ten.

kylian indulged in amara’s scent; the scent of vanilla filled his nose and the taste of cherry chapstick and chocolate drove his mind crazy. it was a hundred times better than all his imaginations he had had of this moment. her lips were soft, pillow-like — perfectly made for his. 

“this is better than last time,” amara whispered between their lips, breathing heavily. 

“je t’avais promis une expérience inoubliable,” kylian replied, his hot breath sending tingles through her body. — i did promise you an unforgettable experience 

amara wrapped her hand around his neck tighter, placing her lips on his again. the amount of happy hormones that rushed through her body, made her close her eyes in satisfaction and adrenaline rushed through her entire body. the gentle kiss soon turned into a kiss full of passion and desire, their feelings of love and care exploding. all the thoughts they had held back, feelings they hadn’t shared were coming out and were added to their kiss. 

another set of minutes passed before the two lovers finally detached from each other. both took heavy breaths, still startled from their heavy kissing seance. amara still felt her body vibrating, tingles still rushing through her. and it was the same for kylian, who also hadn’t been left unbothered from the kiss. they looked at each other, sharing a glance before bursting out in giggles. 

“this was…” amara began first, trailing off to find a matching word that was worthy enough to describe what had just happened. “amazing. more than that.”

“this was just a foretaste,” kylian retorted, a smirk dancing on his lips, “there’s much more.” 

intrigued, she crossed her arms. “really? then tell me, monsieur mbappé, what else is included in your dating package?”

“where do i even begin? let me just say that being with me is like winning the lottery. firstly, we have tons of kisses, whenever you want,” he began, pressing another soft kiss on her lips slyly, “then we have cuddles and guaranteed spooning.” he added, amusement becoming clear on amara’s face. “not to forget the shared clothes. with me, you also get a life supply of hoodies and sweatshirts along with psg tickets to every game—

“i’ll remind you that i’m a proud red,” she cut in, laughing. 

“nevermind that, you’ll also get natural attention and unpredictable dating nights. there won’t be a week where you won’t see this beauty of a face. and let’s not forget the free massages and meals that comes with me.” he went on. 

she looked at him sceptically. “i do not know if i ever want you in my kitchen again.”

his expression changed to shock as he put a hand on his hand, faking his offence. “i can’t believe you’re still holding me to that after i cooked that delicious meal for you the last time. and that just because i burned pasta and popcorn once.”

she waved dismissively. “you’re saying that as if you didn’t nearly put my kitchen on fire. but what else can i expect?”

“also you’ll be able to profit from this beautiful greek god of a body— and don’t look at me like that, i heard you say this about me on the ph9ne,” he added quickly when he saw amara open her mouth. she closed it quickly, thanking any higher power again that she was blessed with the inability to blush. “but let’s be honest, these abs are a true gift. now you won’t have to be embarrassed again when you’re caught staring at them.”

he watched as she put a hand on her forehead, facepalming, making him immediately laugh. 

“but,” he trailed off, holding a finger up. “i haven’t even got to the best part. no boredom. you’ll never get bored with me. tu ne vas même plus connaître le mot l’ennui. we’ll have impromptu dance parties in the kitchen and we can continue our tradition of watching shitty 2000s rom-coms. believe me, it’ll be a blast.” — you won’t even know the word boredom anymore

“you said two,” amara commented, her cheeks starting to hurt from all the smiling. “what’s the other best advantage?”

he walked closer to her, mischievous glint in her eyes. “the last advantage,” kylian began, positioning himself behind amara and putting his arms under hers. “endless tickling.” he stated, launching a sneaky attack of tickles on her sides. he began at her sides, tickling her everywhere on her hips and stomach. she let out a scream, surprised by his sudden attack replacing it quickly with a happy expression. 

the air filled with joyous sounds and laughs as amara tried to escape his hands, squirming and shaking. in the end she managed to squirm enough against kylian’s muscular body, making the two lose their balance and fall onto the sofa where amara used the small moment of shock from kylian to escape from his hands. 

breathlessly, she turned to look at the french striker. “c'était nécessaire?” she demanded, hand over her chest to calm herself down and slow down her heartbeat. — was this necessary 

kylian flashed her a smile, teeth shining brightly. “it’s part of dating me.” he replied cheekily.

“how the heck were you single when we met?” amara asked dumbfounded. “i wish evan would have done half of that for me.”

“let’s never talk of that asshole again, shall we? you’ll get the true experiment of love now. my mother did not raise an idiot when it comes to women.”

she nodded, snuggling closer to him to be able to lean her head on his shoulder. “so… what are we then if we’re talking about the experience of dating you?” amara asked him, as she traced the visible lines of his abs through his shirt. 

he shrugged, not truly knowing how to answer her. he didn’t know what exactly she wanted them to be. what did she want to hear? “i don’t know. you know what i want.” he told her, turning to face her. “je veux t’aimer,” he mumbled, pressing a kiss on her temple, “i want to call you mine,” another kiss, this time just a bit above her earlobe. “je veux être la personne à qui appartient ton cœur.” a soft giggle escaped her lips as kylian held up their intertwined hands and pressed a delicate kiss on the back of her hand. — i want to love you

amara chuckled, snuggling even closer into his chest. the warmth of his body spread immediately to hers, creating a deeper sense of comfort. “i want the same.” she replied softly, playing with the hem of his shirt with her free hand. “but i’m gonna be truthful and admit that i’m a bit scared,” she confessed, “and i love you and love is about compromise and making efforts to meet the other. we’re in this together. i kept you waiting long enough.”

“you’ll never have to be scared with me. we’re taking one step at the time.” he stated, his gentle voice extending the comfort, “for now, we’re just dating. seeing where the wind takes us going with time. we don’t have to rush, we have all the time of the world.”

she nodded, happy and satisfied with his response. he understood her reluctance and didn’t pressure her, he was happy to go slow despite being clear about his intentions and knowing she was just insecure with the whole dating scene, especially dating another public person. 

she detached herself from his embrace, and leaned forward to grab the plate with the chocolate cake she had made. the apple tart had been finished quickly and the two had then taken on the chocolate cake, eating the remains of what was left from her afternoon with her mother. with her free hand, she lifted kylian’s arms again, pulling it over her chest again to feel his warmth. his hand travelled down to her waist, resting there to pull her closer if he needed to. 

“i should have made more,” amara muttered under her breath, watching kylian eat the chocolate cake like it would be the last cake of his life. she reached forward, wanting to grab a piece but her hand was swiftly removed by kylian, nudging it lightly to signify her to back up. “hey, i made this cake.”

“but you already had some while i was away. soit gentil,” he stated before taking another bite of the cake. 

she pointed her finger at him. faking an expression of anger, “i’ll have you know that you ate a whole apple tart against your nutrition trainer’s introductions. at least cut him some slack and h9ld back for the chocolate. i could use some.”

“if you want it so badly…,” he trailed off at the end of his sentence, taking a small piece and bringing it slowly to her mouth. but seconds before she could finally taste the heaven of chocolate she had baked, he intentionally failed her mouth, leading to her having a small spot of chocolate next to her lip. 

“je te jure,” she swore under her breath, grabbing the piece of cake by herself and eating it, not without showering kylian in cold stares and glares. the french striker though had an amused expression on his face, that grew even wider when he saw her sour one. — I swear

“let me remove it,” he said to her, fighting an impending laugh flash. he placed his finger on her cheek to brush away the chocolate he had smeared on her face and then all of sudden leaned forward, stealing a soft kiss which made amara shriek out of shock. 

“kylian!” amara exclaimed amusingly, not even needing to look at the star footballer to know that he was grinning. probably like an idiot, amara thought

his grin spread wider, smiling from ear to ear as he shrugged. “couldn’t help it.”

she rolled her eyes, smirking at him. “si tu voulais m’embrasser, t’auras just à me demander.” — if you wanted to kiss me, all you had to do was ask

“amara, may i kiss you?” he retorted exasperatedly, holding onto her hand. she nodded, a cheeky expression appearing on her face and smiled when kylian placed his lips on hers again. 

she found it funny the way he was just as addicted as her. once they had gotten a taste of what it felt like to kiss each other, they didn’t want to stop. they wanted to indulge into that feeling of wonder and desire, never let go of it again. 

“i could kiss you for hours,” kylian whispered against her lips, making a giggle escape amara’s lips. 

“i feel the same but let’s not be the kind of person who only know each other's lips. we’re not gonna be those couples who are constantly making out with each other.”

kylian shrugged, “i mean we could,” he began but shrunk down once he saw amara’s eyebrow raise, “but yeah, on n’est pas comme ça.” — we’re not like that

pleased with his answer, amara placed the dirty dish out of her lap to be able to move into a more comfortable position. she laid her face on his chest, continuing to trace his ab lines as he played with a few of her loose curls that weren’t tied into her ponytail. 

it was calm, the only sound being their heart that pumped in a perfect rhythm. amara cherished moments like this, when it was just the two of them with nothing else going on. 

“so how’s the music going?” he asked quietly, disrupting the silence around them. amara shrugged dismissively, too focused on the lines that were visible though his white shirt. they should forbid some people to wear those, she thought in her head.

“it’s going well. recorded a few song with grace & hudson but not finished yet. and we’re still looking for some collaboration but, you know, with my reputation could become a bit hard.”

“can’t you just call someone, like i don’t know, travis scott and tell him you want him on your song?” he asked innocently, in an ironic tone. 

amara sighed, looking incredulously at him. “can’t you just call a club and tell them you want their player or why do transfers take so long?” she shot back in the same tone. “collaboration may sound easy but they’re not. you pay artists to collaborate with you. i paid a quarter million to have drake on ‘mine’ and even that was only because grace had some negotiations with him. sadly it’s not that easy.” she explained to him patiently. 

nonetheless her annoyance about her situation, she shrugged dismissively. “anyway, i called a good friend of mine and we talked and i send her the song to see if maybe as a favor she would be on it. and now i just wait.”

“well, i still haven’t gotten my song yet. remember, the you promised me so much.” he teased her making her snort. 

“and you’ll have to wait till i finish my project.” she replied in a firm tone, signalling him that she was done with the topic. she found the way he was excited for his song extremely funny — if only he knew that she was currently dedicating a whole album to him instead of just one song. an album that portrayed every single step and moment He between them. 

he groaned, a his lips scrunching together to a pout. “that’s too long. for all i know, you could be finished in a year.” 

“don’t worry, i won’t. that i can promise you. but i just need more time.”

she took his loud breath as acceptance and focused back to her work, not finished with memorising every inch of his body. everything fit now. like this had been the last piece of the puzzle, needed to find what she so desperately longed for. the feeling of true love. 

for kylian, everything still felt a bit surreal. if someone had told him a year ago, that he would be here, kissing and talking with amara imani, who used to be his celebrity crush and still was, he would have deemed that person for crazy. and yet it was reality now. circumstances and luck had brought them together and maybe he wished they had met at a different time, when she wasn’t completely broken and needed to be repaired. sure, things could have gone quicker than but if he was honest, he wouldn’t change their process for anything. he had at first hand experienced the process of building a relationship that was founded on trust and love. why would he ever feel the need to change that?

bringing himself out of his thought, he lightly nudged amara who had closed her eyes, enjoying the warmth kylian gave her. “want me to play some music?” kylian murmured into her ear, amara nodding, a soft “hmm” leaving her lips while her eyes rested shut, not really paying attention to his question.

“sure, as long as it’s not—“ she began tiredly. “i know, i know. no french rap.” he cut her off, aware of her distaste for his music. he hit play on the playlist, amara had created for him, the first notes of finesse by drake sounding out of his phone. 

it had become a habit for them to play music when they were together. a ritual, where one played music and the other enjoyed and the other way around. it helped them focus on each other, ignore the surroundings around except themselves.

“what’s the first step of your project by the way?” kylian asked her curiously in a low tone, careful to not wake her from her slumber-state. 

“stepping back into the public.” she replied nonchalantly, adjusting her head on his chest. “i’m making my comeback.”

“and i’ll support you on every step through it.” he mumbled, pressing a soft kiss on her hair as she fell asleep. but how could she not? the man she had confessed her feelings for was holding her, without any intention of letting go, he extended a certain sense of comfort and safety amara had never truly felt with evan and he loved her. how could her body not deem him as safe

it was the same for him. even though he hadn’t planned on staying the night, he wouldn’t dare to move even an muscle. the sight of her, sleeping innocently on his chest, was enough to keep him glued to his position for his entire life. if he died right now, he would die a happy man. that was guaranteed. the way her chest lifted calmly in a small rhythm to make clear that she was deep asleep, her soft breaths colliding against his neck — if he could, he would fall all over again for her. she was too perfect for him not too. like said, both added up to each other in the best way possible and it was clear to everyone who saw them, that they wouldn’t find another one like that again. amara finally experienced what she only saw in movies. and it was a million times better. 

nobody had ever loved her like him. but if this was, what it felt like then she would pray to any higher power to keep this feeling — this love. 

𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐌

𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐚.𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢

liked by liyah.clark, charles_leclerc, arianagrande, and 24.385.601 others

amara.imani paris, you treated me well

view all 725.394 comments

amarastan4ever MOM IS BACK AND SHE IS SLAYING

loveramara SOFT LAUNCHING!! WHO STOLE YOUR HEART QUEEN?

liyah.clark who are those fine ladies in the last picture @graceywood 

graceywood hope they’re single

amyswiftie the fact that she just came back out of nowhere and thought we would ignore the soft launch

imanisupporter maybe it’s evan, he and kaia seem a bit distant lately

user 1 no way that’s evan, i doubt amara would even go near him with a 10 inch stick

imaniaddict and let’s be honest, evan doesnt look like that, muscular arms and hand placement — could never be him

imara_amanistan AND WE HAVE LOST HER AGAIN TO SOME MAN WHO WILL PROBABLY SCREW HER OVER AGAIN

kiaramaiman is this the announcement for new music??

chloe.imani i just know she has a whole book with diss tracks for e*an

imanixswift guys, calm down. the man in the picture is obviously me (i’m in my delulu era)

imanigossip ARE WE ALL SKIPPING THE FACT THAT WE’RE GETTING NEW MUSIC

[adaptacy]

It’s the anon with the Yearbook!Reader. Honestly surprised that was pumped out so fast with such quality, I was giggling when I read it ngl. Anyways, I am here to put forth another request for you to choose to do.

Got pretty boy Leland first.

Thinking about Leland and his S/O just relaxing in bed. Soft kisses, nice lil cuddles, some of that fluffy shi. My main point to this was called Leland pretty boy and just like, praising him. Give him all that TLC, babes deserves it.

(Could make it angst/comfort with Leland being insecure about scars he has after the Sawyer family incident, but just praising him for no reason is valid as hell)

It’d be chill if I sent several requests at the same time, yeah? I dont wanna fill up your request box, but I love your writing (Leland especially) and just have so many ideas at times. I also didn’t expect my request to be answered same day, usually takes a while, I’m willing to wait a week or two yknow.

-Kuhuahua

im- i- ik i havent been active on tumblr (ive been rping tcsm on discord <3) but i heard 1 song and it made me think of this request and then i rly wanted to write it SO here we go!

TW: aaaaaaangst with extra angst on the side.

Song recs: When You Gonna Run - Alpha Rev

He never talked about them. You understood why. Honestly, you doubted that he even spoke to his therapist about them. It's been four years. Even now, he still flinches when they're grazed, he whispers out quiet, "Not there, sweetheart," his voice tainted with a somber desperation, genuine hurt. You weren't sure if the pain was physical or emotional. Maybe both.

Four years and he still got teary-eyed if you asked about them, or referenced the incident at all. You'd learned not to, even if you did wish he would open up to you. For the first year that you were dating him you'd just assumed that he would talk about them when he was ready. But then the year came to an end. And so did the second one. And now, at 29 months with him, you'd stopped wishing. Gotten used to the shrugs and the soft sighs, the disdain in his gaze when you inquired about it.

So you didn't bring it up. But you knew he thought about it. Knew he felt it. Not talking about it was easy enough, after a while. But being close with him was hard. Physically close, that is. Every brush of your hand in the wrong spot, or a kiss on the wrong hand, touching your forehead a little to hard against the slit in his eyebrow-

29 months, and you still felt like shit for being unable to remember every single one of his scars. Every single placement- the big ones you could remember. But the small ones spanning the rest of his body, snips of horrors on his arms and the dots of regret on his torso, were impossible to map out.

He sat, watching the movie, next to you, one of his knees bent up to his chest while the other leg hung off of the couch, his chin propped up with one hand, his elbow resting on the cushioned arm of the loveseat, his other arm outstretched next to him, where his hand intertwined with yours.

The ones on his hands weren't bad. There were three on this one, tiny marks that you were surprised hadn't healed. You'd overheard the reason why; the second time you'd joined him at one of his doctor's appointments they'd mentioned him overworking himself, reopening the wounds. You wondered if they still hurt when he worked out.

Without thinking much of it, you scooted closer to him, only a few inches, and you snuck under his arm so that it hung off of your shoulder, though you refrained from leaning against him. He didn't react aside from a small squeeze of your hand. You lifted that hand and pushed a kiss to the back of it, earning his attention.

You didn't meet his eye. You didn't want to see the distant, aching hazel behind the kindness he usually showed. Didn't want to see the microscopic frown that tugged at his lips, you didn't want to see his chest rise and fall with another one of his dejected sighs. You just wanted to kiss him.

So you did, starting at the back of his hand and moving up, your mouth brushing against his arm just under another scar, your eyes closing. This time, it was you who sighed, and you took a gamble, moving your lips up and kissing the coarse patch of skin you'd avoided.

"Baby," he muttered, his voice tainted with the same sadness it held any time he was forced upon a reminder of his past. You didn't reply, nor did you stop, moving up to a different scar, this one closer to his shoulder, repeating the same for this one. A kiss, soft and lingering, before you pulled your head up and finally leaned it against his side.

"I think they're pretty."

There wasn't any reason you'd said it. Just that you'd felt it. And the words came to you, so you gifted them. Leland was quiet for a few minutes. His jaw rested against your temple, both of your heads turned towards the tv, though neither of you were really watching.

Whether he was insecure of them, or if they were still tender, or if they reminded him of the past, or, hell, all of it- they didn't change the way you saw him. Didn't change the way you loved him. You were with him to be with him, every part of him that you could manage to get a hold of. It was okay that he kept some things locked away.

You didn't understand, but you knew why. It was hard. Too difficult for him to remain cheerful when he thought about it. Too difficult to be perfect. Too difficult to feel like he was doing the right thing.

"I know you're hurt."

You couldn't stop yourself.

"I know I'm not ever gonna understand like you do. I know we're always gonna be distant. I know you don't like thinking about it."

But...

"I still love you. It was in the past. And I love you for your past, Lee. And I love you for our future, too. And- I love you right now, in the present."

He stayed quiet, though he leaned against your head a little more, his arm bringing you a bit closer.

"I think they're handsome. And... they're you, so I love them. I love every part of you. Even the scary parts, or the sad parts, or the parts you think are ugly. I love all of you."

At last, you looked up at him, just as he brought a hand to his cheek, wiping away a stray tear. His lip trembled as he looked down at you, but they trembled into a smile, a sad one, like a kicked puppy, but a smile nonetheless. You raised a hand too, cupping his jaw and brushing your thumb under his eye, which pulled a broken chuckle from him, and he sniffled, closing his eyes and shaking his head.

"I'm sorry," you whispered.

"Please, don't be," he replied, his voice cracking as he leaned into your palm, fighting to hold back. You scooted back, and he followed you, laying his head against your shoulder, a soft whine escaping him as he cried.

"I'm always gonna be here. I'm not gonna run. Not gonna leave you for your past. I- I just love you, Leland." Your arms wrapped around his neck as you held him close, resting your chin on his head as he cried, and you gently hushed him, doing your best to reassure.

He didn't often cry. Not to you. Sometimes, on his own time, or when you were pretending to be asleep, you could hear him. But he didn't want to push any of his weight onto you. Didn't want to burden you.

"I can shoulder some of it, y'know. Just cause you can lift a lot of weight doesn't mean you need to do it alone," you hummed, your words lighthearted despite being completely genuine. "I'm right here. I'm here to do it together. Here to be here- here to be yours."

You didn't expect a reply, but he gave one, weak and pained, snagging on his tears, an "I love you," short but sweet. You hugged him closer, leaning down to kiss another scar on the top of his back, and he didn't ask you not to, he didn't flinch, he just let it happen.

"You're perfect, Lee. Scars and all."

[wordsinhaled]

You said that your ask box was open a little bit ago so hello! ik you're currently on a dr. who & GO streak but I recently heard the song "Til You Love Me" and I was curious as to your thoughts on it regarding Dreamling, because. uh. :

Please, don't say I'm wasting my time I've got nothing but time so I'll do all that I can to catch That ghost of a chance

&

But if dreams give you power Then I'm strong enough to offer my heart And never give up till you love me Until you love me

&

I looked in your eyes, so bright and so blue And that's when I knew that you could be mine If good things come to those who will wait Well, I guess I can wait if that's what I have to do Oh, it's worth it for you

And I'm aware that that's like half the song quoted but it is so them coded in my mind.

It admittedly came out in 1995 so not something that Hob could be thinking about during the Missed Meeting (tm) but still. look at those lyrics!

yes - my ask box is always open for anything at all! thank you so much for the ask <3

this song IS so dreamling coded, gosh!!!

this is possibly a PATENTLY ridiculous idea but—

i'm imagining modern day dreamling (maybe post-reunion and post-dream telling hob who he is, but before they actually get together?) where there's a Classic karaoke night at the new inn and hob invites dream. he thinks dream will probably find it deeply silly and trivial and beg off, seeing as he's the king of dreams and all, but dream actually shows up and hob is thrilled to see him... and he ends up singing this song to dream in the cheesiest possible way, as the night is dwindling down.

it may take him all night to work up the courage to do it but it's both the goofiest and most earnest slightly-tipsy-but-completely-serious love confession of all time, in the end. everybody who works at the inn and even some of the regulars have been hearing robbie talk about how gone he is on his best friend for AGES so there may or may not be some cheering when hob sways up to the mic and goes "you know i don't often sing at these things, but i'm dedicating this to someone very special to me. so, erm, here goes," and then grins right at dream.

after the song is over there's a bunch of clapping hob's not actually sure he deserves for that rendition but dream is giving him an inscrutable look, and hob is blushing like mad as though he's a lad of barely twenty and not nearly seven hundred years old. he passes the mic to the next person and shoulders his way through the crowd to dream, who is still looking at him. hob's inner monologue is something like, well, he either wants to murder me for embarrassing him or eat me alive. murder'd be fine right now actually.

"hob gadling," dream says.

"hello," hob says—and despite himself can't keep the soppy grin off his face. it's still so new having dream here, again, in the flesh. "didn't think i'd see you tonight."

"you are a fine singer, my friend," dream tells him.

hob barks a laugh. "hardly! i was just—" this is where he can play it off as a joke. dream had just called him his friend. this is where he can still save even a tiny bit of face and pretend he hasn't been in love with dream since thirteen fucking eighty nine. but... in the end he can't bring himself to pretend. "well, that song's always reminded me of you, i suppose."

"it has been a long time since someone offered up a love song in my honor," dream says. it should come off as a totally pretentious thing to say, really, but dream's mouth is turned up at one corner in the beginnings of a smile, and instead the words make hob's heart do a little flip.

hob tries not to think of all the people (humans? gods? fey creatures? other immortals?) who have dedicated romantic ballads to dream in the past. he wishes he had something to occupy his twitching fingers with, to make it easier to fight the urge to reach over and take dream's long pale hand where it rests on the table next to his wine glass.

and basically like. REALLY SAPPY trying-not-to-flirt-but-still-flirting! and hob is trying to be all chivalrous about it, all, "it doesn't have to mean anything that i badly sang you this soppy song!!!! you called me your friend and i value you so much as a friend!!!!!! i promise i'm not trying to pressure you!!!! i just want you to know how important to me you are—" and dream is all "calling someone a friend is something that can be So Much Deeper Than That if you're dream of the endless" and then they have a sappy lil first kiss because clearly the thing that broke the dam on his Feelings for hob was hearing a mediocrely-sung karaoke version of a reba mcentire song performed for him under dive bar mood lighting :))))

<3 <3 <3

[kingkennny10]

Please Please Please

SP Apocalypse AU

Pt. 3 Little Brother

here we are at stans recollection, you finally get to see my favourite son!! ike!! the development i have planned for ike is heart breaking, but alas 🥱

From high school until day one I spent working at Tweeks family coffee shop, it was originally supposed to be just until I had enough to buy back my childhood home, but I got attached to the friends I made so I stayed. Well, I had bills too.

Kyle ended up also helping me pay for the house so I could move in faster, and since he helped me, I offered him to move in with me which he happily agreed. Kyles family was unsure at first, he convinced them though, probably gave them free range to come check in whenever.

Kyle was doing online college, so he was at the house most of the time. He also had the masters so he didn’t really leave his room much either except for like, food, or the occasional walk. We shared a car which I had most of the time cause of work, which also meant I spent a lot of time picking up Ike after school and after sports practices. Me and Ike got real close, he even started learning guitar from me.

“Ike is that you?” Kyle yells from the kitchen making a sandwich for himself.

“Yea Stan got me after practice!” Ike yells back making his way to the kitchen. He stands with the fridge open looking into it blankly. “He’s grabbing something from the garage.” Kyle finishes making his sandwich and now Ike follows suit making his own.

“You’re practicing guitar with him today right?” Kyle asked and took a bite of his sandwich. Ike joined him at the table before replying.

“Yeah! He said he’s got a new song to teach me.” Ike said excitedly. Kyle nodded along continuing his sandwich.

“So I take it you’re really enjoying it then?” Kyle asks.

“Yea, it’s super cool and chicks dig it.” Kyle shook his head at his little brothers words knowing he’s heard Stan say that exact line. ‘As long as he’s happy.’ He thought to himself.

“Your grades still good?” Kyle asks.

“Yup, better than yours were at my age.” Both of them jumped at the sound of Stans laughter coming from the now open garage door. He was holding a guitar in a case. Kyle rolled his eyes in response to his roommates laughter.

“Yea yea, whatever, I got distracted in high school. At least I was having fun.” Ike laughed so hard he almost choked on his sandwich. Stan set the cased guitar down against the wall before joining them in the kitchen to make a sandwich of his own.

“Fights, and weed. I don’t know how you ended up passing, let alone graduate with scholarships.” Stan piped up putting his sandwich down and cleaning up the counter. Ike was crying with laughter at this point.

“Okay whatever, if I did it so can Ike, no problem.” Kyle said as Stan finally joined them to eat at the table.

“He’s got you there Ike.” Stan said. Ike finished his sandwich and cleaned off his plate before going to check out the hidden guitar.

“So what’s this Stan?” Ike asked about to open it.

“You open it and you’re not learning shit today, wait til we’re done.” Stan said sternly from the table.

“He’s just waiting on you, I’m done.” Kyle said as he stood up to go clean his plate. “Hurry up slow poke.” Kyle said and walked over to the living room couch to have a seat.

“Fine fine.” Stan got up leaving his half finished sandwich at the table to go take a seat next to Kyle on the couch. “Bring it over here Ike.” Stan said waving him over lazily.

“You could have just grabbed it on your way, it’s your stuff.” Ike said lugging one of the straps over his shoulder.

“It’s not mine.” Stan said as he watch Ikes expression change from annoyed to pure excitement. Kyle was also sporting a smile due to his brothers joy. “You can’t learn if you cant practice. Open it up.” Stan said with a smile mirroring Kyles.

“HOLY SHIT!” Ike yelled making both the older boys laugh. “STAN IS THIS REALLY MINE?” Ike yelled as he inspected the sleek black acoustic guitar. Stan let out another chuckle before responding.

“Yea lil dude, it’s all yours, it’s all tuned and everything.��� Ike gently placed his guitar down and tackled Stan into the couch with a hug. “But I’m picking the new song today.” Stan said as he patted Ikes head that was pressed into his chest.

“You can pick all of them! I don’t care!” Ike said in Stans chest.

Since that day me and Ike were inseparable, he also started carrying around that guitar everywhere he could. He only had that guitar for a week before I had to replace a string. The night I gave him his guitar I taught him the song I dedicated to him, he learned it really quickly, I wonder if he knew why I taught him it.

part 3, i hope yall like my lil guy ike, hes like a son to me 🥺 just a sweet lil guy who likes makin fun of his brother 🥰 i love stans relationship w ike, you will grow to learn that through future chapters 😈 also if you look closely you can tell that i didnt have stan narrate his part originally, i also had to change the actual memory a bit cause it wouldn’t make sense if stan told it because it was mostly just ike and kyle dialogue, the guitar part was separate

[rems-writing]

My thoughts on the Work mv

These will contain my somewhat coherent yet very fucking unhinged thoughts on the Work mv by Ateez. For those that haven't seen the mv, skip this post lol

Hongjoong istg I will make it purr for you 24/7. You honestly have been on my mind ever since the teaser and I fucking hate it. Well.... not really lol

Why tf were a bunch of cocks surrounding Seonghwa? All while he's riding a damn ostrich? I had to pause a couple times to laugh that shit out even though my head hurts (I'm a bit hungover lol)

MOTHERFUCKING 👏🏽 JEONG 👏🏽 YUN 👏🏽 HO 👏🏽! i literally didn't know I fucking needed him singing the chorus after Joong until I fucking heard it from his own damn mouth. It's official guys. He's my wrecker. 😔✌🏽

Yeosang, let go of the cock that you're cuddling. Ik that bitch finna be some fried chicken soon lol but like fr though. Why was Yeo cuddling a cock? I may never know ig 🤷🏻‍♀️

CHOI 👏🏽 MOTHER 👏🏽 FUCKING 👏🏽 SAN 👏🏽! WAS IT REALLY NECESSARY FOR YOU TO TURN THAT WHEEL NEAR THAT PIPE OR WHATEVER WHILST SHIRTLESS AND MASKED UP?! YOU SIR NEED TO STOP 🫵🏽 no because listen. I had to pause and rewind a couple times to process that shit. To my fellow San stans.... how are we fucking feeling lol

DO NOT! GET ME! STARTED! ON! SONG HORSECOCK MINGI! LIKE HELLO?! I DIDN'T KNOW I FUCKING NEED HIM SAYING "Got a fur coat so I make it purr" IN THAT DEEP ASS FUCKING VOICE OF HIS UNTIL I CAUGHT MYSELF REWINDING THAT SHIT OVER AND OVER AGAIN! LIKE BE SO FUCKING FR RN! Also, at one point he said sumn about riding whilst he wore a fur coat alongside Hongjoong and listen. Don't fucking judge me. The captions said "Ride with me" but I fucking heard "Ride me" straight from Mingi's mouth.... I'M NOT HORNY! THESE ARE MY HONEST FUCKING THOUGHTS! OK?! anyways

Tbh, I don't have anything to say about Wooyoung except that he looked so fucking fine throughout the mv. Sorry San but I want your man. Put those big muscles to use so we can fight. I'm small enough to bypass you and bust your kneecaps open 🤷🏻‍♀️

FREE CHOI JONGHO FROM THE GROUND! like seriously. The mv fucking opened up with Jongho buried and playing the flute 😭💀 did his hyungs finally have enough of his disrespect towards them? I may never know 🤷🏻‍♀️ also, official announcement. Jongho is my second ult in Ateez. Yeah I fucking said it. The ribo in me has married the mingki in me and I ain't gonna fucking lie. Jongho has been on my mind 24/7 alongside Mingi. 😅 Anyways, that's that

Overall, I absolutely loved the mv and I fucking loved Work even more. I can't wait to get home and listen to the entire album. 🙂‍↕️