#and she gets me a pillow cs i didn't have one and is like

[deeisace]

Fucking christ

[wholoveseggs]

Pretender

18+ ---- {Masterlist} {Tag-List}

{Daemon Targaryen X Reader} Working in a brothel was never easy, but when a man claiming to be the prince comes to visit, it can be downright dangerous.

7.5k words - Warnings: smut, whore!reader, mild dubcon, oral sex m!receiving, face fucking, riding, ffm threesome, rough sex, mentions of rape, graphic violence, choking, gold cloaks, deception & Daemon being Daemon...

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@absolutemarveltrash @darkened-writer

There were far worse fates than being a whore. If it meant that you were able to make it another day in this world, you were willing to do it. Even if that meant selling yourself for a few crowns.

It wasn't all bad, there were some who treated you with kindness and respect, others who didn't, and some who weren't even sure how to treat a woman. They were the ones you felt most sorry for, the ones who just wanted to feel a bit of kindness and were too afraid to go and get it from elsewhere. Or simply had nowhere else to turn.

Tonight was one of the quieter nights. Most of the men were either gone or asleep. You could hear the low murmurs of the few that were still awake, soft moans from the rooms next to you as they had their fun. The smell of sweat and sex hung heavy in the air, it had become something you'd grown accustomed to over the years.

You were lounging around with the other girls, laughing and talking as the night dragged on, when you heard the sound of hooves against the dirt outside, and the creak of a cart.

One of the girls, named Lina, came stumbling in, she was extremely drunk, almost tripping over herself as she tried to regain her balance. Her dress was askew and her hair was messy.

This was a common occurrence for her these days, ever since her man had died she had thrown herself into a bottle, trying to forget. You couldn't blame her for it, she was in pain and she needed an escape, you just wished that her solution didn't cause such destruction.

She plopped down onto the floor next to you and laid her head in your lap. "You're always so warm and soft, just like a pillow" she giggled and rubbed her head into you, like a cat seeking comfort.

You softly ran your fingers through her hair, untangling the knots as best you could. "How are you feeling, sweetie?"

"I feel great," she slurred. "Any work?"

"Not at the moment, no" you sighed.

"That's a shame," she said, looking up at you with big, sad eyes. "I'm low on coin,"

"We all are," said another of the girls, a pretty blonde girl by the name of Kari. She was less sympathetic to Lina's situation than you were.

"If you don't have coin, then leave. Don't stay here and take up our space," she snapped.

"Kari" you hissed, trying to get her to back off, but she ignored you.

"What? I'm right" she scoffed.

You were interrupted by a group of men entering the brothel, loud and obnoxious. They were all dressed in fine clothes, reeking of alcohol and crowns, just what you had been waiting for.

Lina was instantly on her feet, swaying a little but keeping her balance as she walked over to greet the newcomers.

"What can I help you with, my lords?" she asked, her voice a low purr as she batted her eyelashes.

Kari gave you a pointed look and went off to tend to another customer, leaving you alone to deal with the new arrivals.

They all looked like typical nobility. Clean-shaven and dressed in silk. You had a good eye for these sorts of things. It was easy to spot the difference between a merchant and a noble, and these men were definitely nobles.

They were also clearly drunk, slurring their words and stumbling around the place, laughing at everything.

Lina was already leading two of the men away, no doubt eager to earn a few coins and keep her drinking habits intact.

You turned your attention to the man standing to the side of the group. He was tall and slender, with fair skin and long blonde hair. His eyes were a piercing blue, like two pools of ice.

He smiled at you and stepped forward, extending a hand towards you. "Have you ever had a prince before?" he asked, his voice low and smooth.

You took his hand and returned his smile. "No, my lord, I can't say I have,"

You have heard many men claim to be one noble or another, sweet little lies they tell you as a way to seem important. It mattered very little to you, they were all the same when it came down to it.

Kari came sauntering back into the room, her dress slipping off her shoulder as she walked. She looked over at you and the blonde man and raised an eyebrow.

You smiled at her and leaned in closer to the man. "Kari, this one is a prince, isn't he handsome?"

Kari's eyes widened and she let out a small gasp, bowing dramatically, her dress slipping even further down her chest, revealing her cleavage.

"Prince Daemon Targaryen," he announced, his chest puffed out.

"I've never met a prince before," she said, her voice filled with awe. She was over doing it just a little, and you had to fight the urge to laugh at her performance.

"Oh, but I can change that," he replied, a smirk on his face.

Kari grinned and wrapped her arms around him, pressing her body against his.

"I'm sure you can," she whispered, her breath hot against his ear.

His other arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you into his side.

You felt a tingle run down your spine, he was quite handsome and you could see the appeal of bedding a prince, even if you didn't actually believe his claim.

"Why don't we all get comfortable," he said, his voice low and deep.

You and Kari exchanged glances, grinning at each other, rich men usually pay well.

 The two of you led the prince up the stairs, his arm still wrapped around you, his hand resting on your hip. The three of you entered the room, the door slamming shut behind you. He wasted no time in grabbing hold of Kari and kissing her, his hands roaming her body.

You watched with fascination as the two of them kissed and touched each other, their bodies moving together. Without looking at you, he reached out and grabbed you, pulling you towards him and kissing you passionately.

"Double the pleasure, double the coin, my prince," Kari stated gently, breaking the kiss and stepping away from him. She was always keen on making the payment clear, before the fun could begin.

"Are you questioning my generosity?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

Kari shook her head. "No, of course not. I would never do such a thing,"

You nodded in agreement.

The man looked at the two of you, a slight smile on his face. "Do you think a prince cannot afford two whores?" he asked, his tone playful.

You smiled at him, "No, we know you can," and you hoped that you were right.

He grinned and kissed you again, a little more aggressive this time. He nipped at your bottom lip, his teeth grazing against the sensitive skin.

"Kneel for your prince," he commanded, his voice firm.

You and Kari exchanged amused looks, then both kneeled before him. She began to untie the laces of his trousers while you looked up at him with innocent eyes, your tongue running across your bottom lip.

"What's it like? To ride a dragon," you asked him, genuinely curious.

"Like nothing else," he replied.

You could tell that he was getting impatient, his eyes darkening with lust. His hand ran through your hair, gripping it tightly and pulling your head back.

"Suck," he ordered, and you obeyed, wrapping your lips around the tip of his cock. You slowly took more of him into your mouth, using your tongue to pleasure him.

"Gods, that feels amazing," he moaned, his hips bucking forward.

He was rough and demanding, but it was nothing you and Kari couldn't handle. You continued to suck and lick him, while she stroked him and kissed his thighs.

The two of you worked in tandem, bringing him to the edge and then pulling him back. You could feel him growing more and more frustrated, his hand gripping your hair tighter.

Finally, he could take it no longer, he grabbed Kari by the hair and pushed his cock all the way to the back of her throat. His hand pressed against the top of her head as he fucked her mouth hard.

She gagged and coughed, but still tried her best to please him. You could see her discomfort and you slowly stood up, kissing his neck and touching his chest, trying to calm him down.

After a few more moments, he released her, shoving her back. She fell back on the floor, coughing and sputtering.

He was breathing heavily, his eyes wild. Without a word, he pulled down your dress, revealing your naked form beneath. He was on you in an instant, pushing you down onto the bed and climbing on top of you, his hands on your throat.

Your head spun, and the room seemed to grow hazy as the pressure on your throat increased. He parted your legs with his knee and pressed himself inside you, groaning with pleasure as he buried his cock deep within you.

He was a wild man, taking you roughly, with no thought of your own comfort or pleasure. Grunting and growling like an animal as he claimed you. You could feel the tears pricking your eyes as his hand tightened around your throat.

"How does it feel to fuck a dragon?" he asked, his face mere inches from yours. You couldn't reply, his hand still holding your windpipe in a vice-like grip. His eyes were cold and calculating, the passion of a moment ago now gone.

You scratched at his wrists, but he just laughed, slamming into you with a savage ferocity. He was like a beast, taking you for all you were worth.

When men were rough like this, a part of you would disappear inside yourself. You would no longer feel as if it was you who were being manhandled, the parts of your body no longer connected to your mind.

You could smell his sweat, feel his hands on you, hear the low rumbles of his voice, but you were no longer here. Your body was simply an object, a vessel, and your mind had retreated somewhere far away, watching from the shadows.

Kari had composed herself enough to join the two of you on the bed. She climbed behind you, running her hands along your body. You were just lying there, allowing yourself to be used, but Kari's touch was a small comfort.

He slammed into a few more times before climbing off of you and grabbing Kari, flipping her on her stomach, pinning her down. He wasted no time entering her, thrusting in and out like an animal, the sound of slapping flesh filling the room.

You lay there, listening to the sounds of the two of them, trying to make sense of things. He didn't last long, men like this rarely did. After a few minutes, he let out a strangled groan and pulled out, his seed spilling out onto her back.

He rolled off of her, panting and laughing to himself, a satisfied grin on his face. She sat up and brushed some hair from her sweat-soaked forehead, looking over at you.

She crawled towards you and wrapped her arms around you, kissing your cheek gently. Her hand intertwining with yours. The two of you had certainly experienced worse customers than him. He didn't appear unhappy with what you did. You were fortunate in that sense.

"I shall take you both on my dragon, fuck you on his back while we fly," he said, a wicked grin on his face.

You had no idea how one would manage to do such a thing, but you were certain he was just trying to impress you.

"That would be something," Kari replied, a smile on her lips.

He was sitting there, his hand lazily stroking his cock as he watched the two of you. "Kiss," he commanded, his tone leaving no room for argument.

You and Kari exchanged a look, then leaned in and kissed each other, the feeling of her soft lips against yours making your heart skip a beat.

He was watching the two of you with rapt attention, his eyes dark and hungry. He reached out and pulled you away from her, his lips crashing down onto yours. His hands roamed your body, his touch rough and demanding.

"That's a good girl," he whispered, his breath hot against your ear.

He grabbed a tankard of wine from the nightstand, drinking it down and tossing it aside. You observed the muscles on his back, the way they flexed in the dim light, you could see long scars down his back. They looked like the marks caused by a whip, you knew the scars well, having seen them on many of the men and women in the brothel.

"My Prince, forgive me, but those scars, where did they come from?" you asked, unable to contain your curiosity.

He flinched at your question, not looking at you. "Tourneys," he said sharply, bending over and grabbing his shirt from the floor.

You didn't press the issue, he clearly didn't want to talk about it.

He pulled his shirt on, the silk material stretching over his muscular frame. Then he collapsed onto the bed, pulling you down with him, wrapping his arm around you.

You looked at him and saw a haunted look in his eyes, the same look that many of the others in the brothel had. He was running from something, or someone.

"Call me your prince and tell me you love me," he whispered, his breath warm against your ear.

"Of course, my prince," you replied, and the words felt hollow.

"I love you my prince," Kari purred, cuddling up to him.

"Yes, I know you do," he said, his eyes glazing over.

The two of you stayed with the prince all night, his talk turning into ramblings, bragging about dragon riding, flying in the clouds, great battles and tourneys he had won. He talked of nothing but how good he had it, how great he is, of all the wonderful things he owned.

While it was not the worst experience you'd had, it wasn't a pleasant one either. Kari kept encouraging him to keep bragging, praising him and showering him with compliments. All you wanted was to close your eyes and drift off to sleep, but his obnoxious voice made it nearly impossible.

By the time the sun came up, he was fast asleep. His snoring so loud you were sure he was going to wake up the rest of the brothel. 

You and Kari were counting the coin he had given you, making sure it was all there. It wasn't as much as you were expecting, considering his claims of royalty. But you'd make do, it'd tide you over for a while. You would certainly sleep comfortably tonight.

Although he was Prince Daemon, you didn't want to fuck him again, not for any amount of coin. If he returned to visit, you would simply make yourself scarce.

Much to your disappointment the prince had turned into a regular at the brothel. At least once a week he would return, bringing with him a small fortune and a lot of drink.

Lina was very pleased, she was the one he favored most of all. And as long as she was getting her coins, she was happy. You supposed she was too numb from drink to feel the pain or humiliation of his treatment.

You and Kari, on the other hand, were less enthusiastic about the prince's presence. Always trying your best to avoid him, finding ways to keep yourselves occupied while he was there.

But you had a feeling that he knew what the two of you were doing, and that you were avoiding him. He didn't seem upset by it, but there was a look in his eye that made you nervous.

He was in the main room tonight, with Lina in his lap, the two of them drunkenly talking about who knows what. But his eyes were on you, and it made your skin crawl.

You quickly got up and looked for a place to hide, not wanting to be caught in his sights. He was a dangerous man, you could sense it, and you had no interest in being alone with him.

You made your way through the halls, between tapestries of silk and dimly lit rooms, keeping your head down. It was almost too easy to disappear here, to find the dark corners and hide away from the world.

You weren't looking where you were going, and you found yourself crashing into someone.

"Sorry, sorry," you muttered, moving to continue walking.

You felt a hand grip your arm, and you looked up at a man dressed in dark clothing, a hood covering his face. There was an air of danger around him, the way he held himself was confident and commanding.

He looked you over, his gaze roaming over your body. From what you could see of his face, he was handsome, with a strong jawline and sharp features. His hair was blonde, resting on his shoulders.

"No need to apologize, little dove," he said, his voice deep and rich.

His hand slid down your arm, his fingers brushing against yours. "Come, let's have a drink," he whispered, his breath hot against your ear.

You nodded, grateful for any excuse to get away from the prince. You could also do with some extra coin, and this man seemed willing to pay.

He followed you to one of the private rooms, the curtains hanging around the bed were a soft blue, the room dimly lit by candles.

He gently leaned his sword against the wall, his fingers tracing over the hilt. It had an odd looking pommel, the metalwork intricate, the hilt the shape of a gold dragon.

He turned and sat on the bed, his hood falling down, revealing his face.

He was handsome, his blonde hair tumbling over his shoulders, his eyes sharp and bright. He was tall and lean, with a muscular build.

"So, what brings you to a place like this?" you asked, standing in front of him.

"Curiosity," he replied, reaching out and pulling you into his lap.

You gasped, your face inches from his. He smirked, his fingers wrapping around the silk ribbon around your waist, untying it. The thin dress fell open, revealing your chest.

"You are a pretty thing," he whispered, his eyes raking over your body.

You blushed, your heart beating faster. You were used to men commenting on your looks, but something about the way he said it made you feel warm.

"I bet you tell all the girls that," you teased, your hand reaching out and resting on his chest.

"I bet you pretend to enjoy it," he countered.

"And if I do?" you asked, raising an eyebrow.

He laughed, his fingers tracing the curve of your neck.

"I'll know the difference," he said, leaning in, his breath ghosting over your lips.

"Is that so?" you whispered, a smile tugging at your lips.

He chuckled, his other hand coming up and resting on your lower back. He pulled you closer, his lips brushing against yours.

He was surprisingly gentle, his lips soft, his hands caressing your body. He kissed you like a lover, not like a man who was paying for a whore.

You melted into his touch, your hands moving up and tangling in his hair. He groaned, his fingers digging into your skin.

You knew the brothel had men of all shapes and sizes, some kinder, others rougher, but he was a different breed altogether. You were enjoying yourself in a way you never had before.

"See? You're not pretending,"he whispered against your lips.

You laughed softly, your eyes fluttering open, looking into his. He was staring at you with such intensity, it made your heart skip a beat.

He smiled at you, his hand cupping your cheek, his thumb stroking your skin. You could feel the warmth of his body, the strength of his arms around you.

"What kind of men do you usually entertain?" he asked, his lips moving to your neck.

"All kinds," you replied, letting him undress you, the silk pooling at your waist. "From beggars to princes," you said.

"Princes, hmm? I suppose a prince would have more coin than most," he said, gently cupping your breasts, his thumbs grazing over your nipples.

"Some," you replied, trying to keep your breathing steady. “The prince does come here often. Although he is not the most agreeable of men," you explained.

"You know a lot about the prince?" he asked, his lips grazing against the shell of your ear.

"Indeed, he told me he would show me his dragon," you said, smiling, tracing your finger down his chest, playing with the hem of his shirt. "Caraxes, is it's name," you added, taking hold of his shirt and pulling it off.

"Oh? That's an interesting promise," he replied, his lips pressing kisses along your shoulder, his teeth nipping at the soft skin.

"He said I could ride it too," you said, feeling his lips curve into a smile against your skin.

"I'm sure you would be more than capable," he breathed, his nose brushing over the curve of your neck. "Perhaps you can practice on me," he murmured.

You giggled, a warmth blooming between your legs. He was handsome and charming, his touch gentle, he knew what he was doing. His hands moved over your skin, leaving a trail of heat wherever they went.

You shifted on his lap, feeling his arousal pressing against you. "Is that so?" you asked, your lips ghosting over his.

"Mmm," he groaned, his eyes darkening, his lips claiming yours.

His hand cupped the back of your neck, holding you close. You could taste the sweetness of the wine on his tongue, his kiss full of passion and desire. Your hands went to his breeches, unlacing them and pulling out his cock.

You stroked him, feeling the velvety skin beneath your fingers. He groaned, his lips breaking away from yours.

"If I were to ride you, I'm not sure I would be able to walk away afterwards," you whispered, looking down at him.

"Maybe that's my plan," he said, as his hand slipped between your legs.

You gasped, the pleasure rippling through your body. You had a feeling this was going to be the best coin you had ever earned. It was always a nice treat when you could be with a man that you actually enjoyed touching.

"You're bigger than most of the other men I've had," you purred, running your hand up and down his length.

"I bet you say that to all the men," he teased, his fingers dipping into your cunt, feeling the wetness there.

"I'll say whatever you want me to," you said, kissing his neck, his jawline.

"Such a sweet little liar," he said, his hand cupping your cheek, tilting your head up.

You looked at him, your eyes meeting his. They were a deep blue, almost purple. There was a gentleness to them, but also a fire.

"Am I bigger than the prince?" he asked, a playful smirk on his lips.

"Would it be treason to say yes?" you whispered, your teeth grazing his earlobe.

"I won't tell him," he said, his lips capturing yours in a searing kiss.

You smiled into the kiss and slowly rocked your hips, rubbing your slit against the underside of his cock. He groaned, his hands gripping your waist, his thumbs brushing over your hip bones.

You pulled away from the kiss, sitting up slightly and lining his cock up with your pussy. You sank down onto him, keeping your eyes locked with his.

You began to ride him, slowly at first, then you increased the pace. He let out a low groan and his hands squeezed your ass, helping you bounce on his cock.

You leaned down, capturing his lips in another passionate kiss. Your hands gripped his shoulders, your nails digging into his skin.

You pulled away from the kiss and rested your forehead against his.

"Fuck," he hissed, his fingers digging into your thighs.

You let out a breathless laugh and began to ride him faster, grinding down onto his cock. You could feel his length pulsing inside of you, his breath hot against your neck.

He suddenly flipped you into your back, your hair splayed out across the pillows. He grabbed your thighs and pushed your legs back, sinking his cock inside you once more.

You moaned, feeling him pound into you. He leaned down and captured your lips in another kiss, his tongue invading your mouth. Your hands went to his arms, they were made of pure muscle, the corded veins bulging under his pale skin.

His hips started to falter, a sure sign he was close to his release. He buried his face in the crook of your neck as he let out a low and desperate groan. You could feel his cock throb as his seed filled you.

"I can see why the prince likes you," he said, a small smile on his face as he rolled off of you.

You chuckled, moving to cuddle up next to him.

"Oh? What makes you say that?" you asked, nuzzling into his chest.

"The way you fuck," he said, his lips curling up into a smirk. "It's truly fit for royalty,"

You giggled and buried your face into his chest, the smell of his sweat mixed with sex intoxicating.

"You are a far better lover than him, perhaps living up in a castle all his life has spoiled him," you said, tracing patterns on his chest.

He smiled, his arm wrapping around your waist, his thumb rubbing circles over your skin.

"I don't even know your name," you whispered, your hand reaching up and stroking his cheek.

"It doesn't matter now, does it?" he asked, his voice low and soft.

You watched him, wondering why a man would pay for a whore when he could easily get a woman willing. But then again, you knew the type of men who came to a place like this, perhaps he was married, or didn't have time for courtship.

He sat up and poured himself a cup of wine, the dark liquid spilling into the glass. He took a sip, then handed it to you.

"Thank you," you said, sitting up and taking a drink, the taste of wine sweet on your lips.

He leaned in and kissed you passionately. You hummed softly and cupped his cheek, his stubble scratching your palm.

He moved off the bed and grabbed his shirt, pulling it over his head. He picked up his sword, strapping the sheath to his belt.

You laid back, propping yourself up by your elbows as you watched him dress. He looked at you, a smirk on his face.

"You look lovely like that," he said, his voice a low purr.

You nodded in thanks, giving him a gentle smile and watched him pull out his coin purse.

"Keep the change," he said, tossing the bag onto the bed.

"Thank you, ser," you said, watching him walk out the door.

"Ser," he chuckled. "I am no ser," he said, looking back at you one last time before shutting the door.

The following evening was a busy one, you had spent most of the night serving drinks, the men rowdy and full of ale.

The drunker they got, the more coin they would spend, but that also came with its risks. Some of the men would become violent, the women in the brothel would often have bruises, sometimes it would be a black eye or busted lip.

You had gotten good at handling the rowdy customers, a few sweet words and a soft touch was enough to keep most men docile.

You hadn't seen Lina since yesterday, which was odd, usually she was down here, drinking and entertaining the men.

"Have you seen Lina?" You asked Kari, who was collecting a number of empty tankards.

"She's probably passed out in some room, drunker than a sailor," Kari replied, shaking her head.

You frowned, that didn't seem right. Lina had a habit of drinking, but never enough to not show up for work.

Kari could see the concern on your face and placed her hand on your shoulder, squeezing gently.

"Don't worry about her, she'll be fine," she said, giving you a reassuring smile.

"What if Prince Daemon comes in? I do not wish to deal with him," you whispered.

"Then don't," she said, pouring herself a glass of wine.

"I cannot refuse him, he would make my life a living hell," you sighed.

"Then you best stay out of his way," Kari said, patting your shoulder.

You nodded, but knew that was easier said than done. If he showed up tonight, you were sure to run into him.

You continued to serve drinks, doing your best to avoid the more aggressive customers. You felt a hand grip your wrist, and turned to see one of the regulars.

"Come sit on my lap pretty girl," the man said, tugging on your wrist.

You smiled sweetly and sat down on his lap, resting your arm on his shoulder.

"How have you been, my love?" you asked, batting your lashes.

"Better now that you're here," he said, his hand resting on your knee, his fingers rubbing circles on the inside of your thigh.

"That's sweet," you said, trying not to flinch at his touch.

You leaned in and whispered into his ear, "What can I do for you tonight?"

He smirked, his hand sliding further up your thigh, he looked over your shoulder and paused. His eyes were fixed on something behind you, his expression one of shock and disgust.

You turned to see Lina stumbling through the main room, her hair a mess, her clothes torn, blood trickling down from a wound on her head.

She was muttering incoherently, her eyes wild and unfocused. She stopped in the middle of the room, looking around, a terrified expression on her face.

"Lina?" You immediately got off the man's lap and rushed to her side, placing your hand on her shoulder.

She screamed, slapping your hand away and staggering back. Her eyes were wide, her breathing heavy, she was looking at you as if you were a stranger.

"Lina, it's me," you said, trying to calm her.

She shook her head, backing away, her eyes darting around the room.

"You're alright," you said, stepping towards her.

She raised her hands in front of her, as if trying to shield herself from something. You could see the bruises on her wrists and her hands were trembling.

You reached out to her, but she flinched, moving away from you. She backed into a table, knocking over a tray of drinks.

The noise drew the attention of the patrons, everyone was staring at her, murmuring to each other.

You grabbed her arm, gently leading her to the stairs. She let you lead her, her body tense, her breathing rapid.

You opened the door to her room and led her inside. You could see the dried blood and cum on her thighs, and the tears in her clothes.

"What happened to you, Lina?" you asked, but she remained silent, her gaze fixed on the floor.

You went to the washbasin and dampened a cloth, sitting next to her on the bed. You began to clean the dried blood from her face, gently wiping the cloth over her bruised skin.

"You are safe now," you said, trying to soothe her.

"It was him," she suddenly said, her voice quiet and strained.

"Him who?" you asked, dipping the cloth back into the water, the blood turning it pink.

"Prince Daemon," she said, her voice cracking.

Your eyes widened, the cloth slipping from your fingers and landing in the basin with a wet splash.

"Daemon did this to you?" you asked, a pit of anger forming in your stomach.

Lina nodded, tears streaming down her face, her body shaking. "You mustn't tell anyone, he will kill me," she cried.

"Lina, I...," you trailed off, unsure of what to say.

You wrapped your arms around her and held her close, letting her cry into your shoulder.

"I'm sorry," you said, your voice breaking.

She pulled away, her eyes red and puffy, her lips quivering.

You felt your chest tighten, a wave of rage and despair washing over you. Daemon was a vile, evil man, and the fact that he had hurt Lina, filled you with an overwhelming anger.

You clenched your fists, feeling your nails dig into your palms, a stinging pain spreading over your skin.

"I... I lost all my coin...He took it," she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

You wondered why a prince would bother stealing coins from a common whore, surely he had enough coin of his own.

"You can have whatever I earn tonight," you said, your tone serious.

"You don't have to do that," she said, shaking her head.

"Of course I do, you would do it for me," you said, gently cupping her cheek.

She nodded, her eyes glistening with fresh tears.

"Stay here, get some rest," you said, helping her lay down.

She pulled the blanket up to her chin, curling up into a ball, her body still trembling. You left the room, closing the door quietly behind you.

You walked back down to the main room, a burning rage coursing through your veins. You spotted Daemon, sitting at a table, drinking wine and laughing with a group of men.

You wanted to confront him, to pour hot tar over his head and watch him scream and writhe in pain. You looked around the room for a weapon, anything you could use to inflict harm upon him.

Your eyes landed on a serving tray, you picked it up, the metal cool against your palm. You were about to do something rash, something you couldn't come back from, when the man from last night caught your attention.

He was sitting at a table by himself, nursing a drink. He was wearing the same leathers as last night, and his sword was strapped to his hip.

He looked up, as if he could feel your gaze on him, and gave you a small smile. He gestured for you to come over.

You placed the tray back on the table, and walked over to him. You needed the coin for Lina, and he felt nice and smelled good, it would be a pleasant distraction.

"Back so soon?" you asked, swallowing your rage and fear, turning it to soft words and flirty touches.

You sat down on his lap, wrapping your arm around his shoulders, kissing his cheek and smiling sweetly.

"I missed you," he said, his hand going to your waist.

"Liar," you whispered, a playful smirk on your lips.

He laughed, the sound deep and rich, his eyes twinkling with amusement. He looked around the room then back to you, his gaze roaming over your body.

"Shall we?" he asked, his voice a low rumble.

"Yes," you replied, sliding off his lap and taking his hand.

He followed you to the stairs, his hand on the small of your back. You glanced over your shoulder at Daemon, a scowl on your face as you walked away from the opportunity to harm him.

You quickly led the man to your room, shutting the door and leaning against it, letting out a sigh.

"Are you alright?" He asked, setting his sword down and untying his shirt.

"Fine," you said, watching him undress.

His chest was pale and well muscled, his body lean and strong. He looked up at you, a playful smirk on his lips.

"Lying once again," he said, unbuckling his belt.

"My friend was attacked," you said, walking over to him, running your hands over his bare chest.

"I am sorry to hear that," he said, his gaze focused on you, his hands reaching up to cup your face.

"She was beaten and raped by Prince Daemon," you said, leaning into his touch, his calloused palms rough against your cheeks.

He stiffened at that, but just for a moment, before untying your dress and letting it pool at your feet.

"You shouldn't say things like that," he said, his hands gripping your ass and pulling you closer.

"Why? It's the truth," You replied, wrapping your arms around his neck, pressing your naked body against his.

"It can get you killed," he said, his voice low and his breath hot against your ear.

You shivered, his words sending a chill down your spine. "I do not care, he deserves to die," you hissed, nipping at his bottom lip.

He smiled and lifted you up, carrying you to the bed and laying you down. His lips were soft against yours, his tongue exploring your mouth.

"Tell me, do you always have such violent thoughts?" He asked, his hands roaming over your body.

He gripped your hips and pulled you underneath him, his erection pressed against your pussy.

"When men like him exist? Yes," you replied, moaning softly as he ground his hips against yours.

"And what would you do, if you had the power?" He asked, his fingers ghosting over your clit, making you moan.

"I would cut him open, and feed him his own guts," you replied, arching your back, a jolt of pleasure shooting through you. "Or perhaps burn him alive," you added, a dark smile spreading across your lips.

He chuckled, a wicked grin on his face, his eyes flashing with desire.

"And what of me? What would you do to me?" He asked, his fingers slipping inside of you, moving slowly, his thumb circling your clit.

You kissed him, hard and fierce, nipping at his lip, a small bead of blood forming. You could taste it, sweet and coppery, the smell of iron filling your nose. He chuckled at your roughness, his fingers moving faster.

"You've not wronged me, yet," you moaned against his lips, your hands going to his cock, the speed of your strokes matching his.

"Yet?" He chuckled, a low and seductive sound.

"There is time," you teased, pushing him off you and onto his back.

You straddled him, lowering yourself onto his cock, moaning as you felt him stretch you. He gripped your hips, guiding you as you began to ride him, his eyes watching you intently.

You arched your back, rolling your hips, grinding against him, your hands on his chest. You could feel him hitting that spot inside of you, making you moan and pant.

He sat up, his hands gripping your ass, his lips finding yours, a soft and passionate kiss. You wrapped your arms around his neck, holding him close, his warmth enveloping you.

"Harder," you pleaded, a soft whimper escaping your lips.

He obliged, his grip tightening, his hips thrusting harder, deeper, filling you completely. You buried your face in his neck, muffling your cries of pleasure, your body tensing as you came.

He grunted, his cock throbbing inside of you, his hot seed spilling into you. You held each other close, panting and sweating, the room silent save for your labored breaths.

He captured your lips, a soft and gentle kiss, his fingers stroking your cheek. You pulled away, resting your forehead against his, a contented sigh escaping your lips.

"Is he here now? This prince," he asked, a bitter inflection to his tone.

"Yes," you replied, running your hands through his hair.

"Will you point him out to me?" He asked, his grip on your hips tightening.

You looked at him, a curious expression on your face. "Why?"

"Just curious," he replied, his fingers tracing circles on your lower back.

You looked into his eyes, a strange fire had crept into his gaze. You could feel a change in the air, the tension thick and heavy, the room seeming to grow darker.

"Okay," you said softly, a hint of trepidation in your voice.

"Good," he said, a sly smile spreading across his lips.

He helped you off his lap, standing and gathering his clothes, pulling his trousers and shirt back on.

You watched him, the way his muscles moved beneath his skin, his eyes focused and determined. He seemed to be lost in thought, his gaze distant, as if he was planning something.

"Who are you?" You asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

He didn't respond, just held out his hand for you. You took it, and let him help you off the bed, your fingers intertwined.

You descended the stairs, the tavern full and bustling, the air thick with the scent of sweat and ale. You led him towards the corner where the prince was, his table surrounded by a group of men.

"Them," you said, pointing to the prince and his entourage.

He nodded, and pulled you close, kissing your cheek and placing a large bag of crowns in your hand.

"For you and your friend," he whispered, before releasing you and disappearing into the crowd.

You stared after him, confused and intrigued. You didn't know what was going on, or what he was planning, but you couldn't help but feel a strange sense of excitement.

You went over to Kari who was in the lap of the regular from earlier, her hands wandering over his broad chest.

"Where did you go?" She asked, glancing at you, a questioning look in her eyes.

"Upstairs, with the man from last night," you replied, showing her the coins.

She grinned, her eyes wide. "Look at you, making the big coin," she said, a mischievous glint in her eye.

Suddenly there was a loud crash, the sound of breaking glass. You turned to see the prince on the ground, his table overturned, a shattered bottle of wine next to him. The men he was with nowhere to be seen.

A number of gold cloaks had come storming in, and were surrounding the table, their swords drawn.

You watched the man you had just been with appear behind them, making his way through the gold cloaks, they parted for him without question.

The prince looked up at him, his eyes wide with fear, his body trembling.

"What are you doing? I'm the prince! Prince Daemon Targaryen!" He stammered, trying to back away.

The man laughed, and looked around at the gold cloaks, who were smiling and laughing with him.

"Funny," he said, looking down at the prince. "I could have sworn that was me."

The man who claimed to be the prince looked horrified, his eyes wide with shock.

"That's right, your grace," the man said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "You've been caught," he continued, the smirk turning into a sadistic grin.

You watched in horror and amazement as the pretender prince tried to scramble away, only to be stopped by a sword being plunged into his stomach.

He let out a gurgled cry, his blood spraying out onto the floor, a look of pure terror on his face. You and Kari screamed and looked away, covering your mouths in shock.

There was a horrible, visceral wet sound as the real prince Daemon cut open the pretender's stomach, and pulled out his innards, feeding them to him.

The room was silent, save for the sound of the dying pretender, gagging and wailing, his blood pooling around him.

"Let this be a lesson to all those who would dare to impersonate a prince of the realm," Daemon said, his voice booming across the tavern. "All pretenders shall meet the same fate."

The pretender had fallen silent, his body lying in a pool of his own blood and guts. Daemon wiped his hands and sword on the pretender's clothes, and turned to the gold cloaks.

"Clean this up, and dispose of the body," he said, his tone commanding.

The gold cloaks bowed, and began to drag the pretender's body from the tavern. The real prince looked around the room, his eyes landing on you.

You immediately looked to the floor, bowing before him, your heart pounding. You couldn't believe what had just happened, that the prince was a pretender and that the real Daemon had just been in your bed.

He walked over to you, and you kept your gaze down, not daring to look at him. You felt his hand under your chin, tilting your head up, forcing you to meet his gaze.

"I'll be sure to burn him too," he said, a small smile on his lips.

You could only nod, your voice caught in your throat. He smiled and released you, turning and walking away.

Everyone was in a state of shocked silence, people staring in awe and disbelief. Kari looked at you, her eyes wide and her face pale.

"What just happened?" She asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I... I don't know," you replied, your own voice shaking.

It was a lesson, one you never forgot. That even among whores, the truth would always find its way to the surface. And for that, there was no mercy.

[altxrrmelancholy]

The me of Yesterday, The me of Today, The me of Tomorrow - Jwy and Cs

Tags: poly relationship, woosan x reader, body insecurities, Wooyoung is just being annoying for no reason, crying, San is very sweet, suggestive, a bit of angst, hurt/comfort.

Note: This is for a friend (and anyone struggling with this) on here who told me about her insecurities about having smaller boobs than her sister's firmer and larger ones, and getting made fun of because of it. This is for y'all, wherever you are 🩷 (this was requested by her, I'm not spilling any secrets so dw)

If you can guess which song the title is from then you're a real one.

•••

Wooyoung couldn't have asked for a better night. He was with the two people he loved so much, lounging on San's bed. They couldn't find any other day to be together, as their schedules have become packed these days, forcing them to meet at night instead. He was happy that, despite annoying his lovers constantly, they agreed to meet in yours and San's apartment, with him still living in his frat house. Safe to say that he was content, laying on San's stomach on his bed with his eyes closed, as the man doom-scrolled on TikTok. He loved this so much.

"So you guys think I could pull off implants?"

Until an annoying grating voice spewing nonsense sounded from the corner of the room. "What the fuck are you on about this time."

Wooyoung looked in your direction to find you topless, cupping your boobs while facing the mirror. You turned yourself in different angles, looking for... who the fuck knows before frowning. Wooyoung would have said something pervy already about him not having his mouth on your chest when you're topless, but a slap on his cheek stops him in his tracks. "Hey!"

"Woo." He looked up to see his boyfriend look at him disapprovingly before narrowing his eyes. "Baby what's wrong." His attention turns to you, still dejectedly staring at your boobs.

"She does this all the time, San. Are you looking for attention? Is that what you want? Is me sucking your boobs not enough?"

"Woo stop." San's voice raises a little startling both you and Woo. "I swear if you say anything else, you're not spending the night here. I mean it."

Wooyoung scoffs and shifts away from San, making himself comfortable on a pillow. "Fine then. Whatever."

You look at both of them bickering silently. You knew what Woo meant when he said what he said. But that didn't make you any less dejected. Sure, your boobs filled your hands as you cupped them. But you had small hands. San's and Woo's however were bigger than yours and couldn't fully cup them. In the middle of intimate sessions, you would sometimes feel embarrassed when either of them kissed all over your chest, wishing that your breasts were bigger, so they could squeeze and prod them however.

"Y/n. I know what you're thinking, stop." You look towards San enchanted by his sweet soft voice. His eyes however told a different story. He waved you over to sit next to him. You bent down to pick up your top when you heard San exclaim.

"Aht! Leave your clothes. Come as you are."

You hesitated a bit before walking over to San, slowly but surely. Woo was still turned away from the both of you but you could see his eyes were still open, listening in.

San dragged you by your arms towards him and sat you on his thighs facing him. He allowed you to take the duvet that Woo was using, to cover yourself up. You then settled, your eyes spelling sadness as you waited for San to speak.

San couldn't really understand why you made comments like these all the time. In his eyes, you were perfect. You were strong, independent and could easily rely on yourself. Both him and Woo were proud of you. They loved you so much, and to see you dejected over something like this was obviously making them sad too, especially since they loved your boobs. Woo couldn't really say it as it is, but he's sure he feels horrible too. He wanted to somehow make you know that it doesn't really matter what size your boobs are, but this isn't the first time something like this has ever happened. After all, you can't really see the love others have for you if you don't love yourself.

"Y/n." You looked up at your boyfriend's kind eyes. "Did anyone say anything to you?"

You shifted a little, eyes slightly furrowed. "What? No. What do you mean?"

"Because you couldn't have started feeling like this out of nowhere, especially after we reassured you last time." He swept some hair away from your face, behind your ear.

You looked down. Why do you keep worrying your boyfriends? Why couldn't you just be perfect enough for them?

"Love, look at me." He lifted your chin to look up at him. "Hhmm? Tell me."

You felt your eyes start filling up. Your boyfriend had changed his tone and was speaking way softer, realizing that this was not a time to repremand or scold you. "It's just... O-on the internet, this pretty girl with bigger boobs... And all the men were saying that... that she was ideal. And th-that, they were attracted to her and I just wanted to feel the way she felt." You were crying at this point. Wooyoung wanted so badly to turn around and say something but hw knew whatever he would say was the wrong thing. That's why San was there. That's why there were three of you.

San understood now a bit clearer. He glanced at his boyfriend to check on him and then to you. He wipes the tears away, like he always has. Like he always will.

"Do you want other men's attention?"

This made you look up. "Huh?" The softest he has ever heard.

"Do you want other men to see you as an object? Do you want to only be known because of your boobs, and not the other amazing qualities that you have? Do you want to spend the rest of your life sad, because a part of your body pisses you off because of other people's opinions?"

It was often hard for you to fully process words like this, especially in a puddle of your own self hatred. You often worry they would leave you especially Wooyoung, who is surrounded by younger girls with bigger boobs than yours. You've seen some of them. How pretty they look. But you understood at that moment what San was trying to put across, and you did not like the sound of seeking male validation. The only validation you needed was your boyfriends'.

"No..." You shook your head after a while. "I don't like the sound of that."

"You see?" San lips stretched as he smiled. "Then what's making you feel like this? I know it's not about some random ugly nobodies."

Wooyoung laughed at that one. San looked at you as if trying to read your mind. He heard what you said earlier about wanting implants. He never really paid attention to such comments as he thought that if he ignored them, you would too. He guesses that it didn't really-

That's it.

"Love? Are you doing this because of us?" He says with revelation. The way you looked down told him what he needed to know. Wooyoung even shifted to his back to look up at both of you. "Love, you know we love you, right? You don't need validation from us to form an opinion on yourself, you know that right?"

"But I just want to look good for both of you San."

"Y/n trust me right now when I say this but you're the sexiest person ever. The way you move, the way you exist... You're so perfect Y/n. So who the hell is telling you that you can't love yourself, huh? Why are you trying to change yourself for us, when the only one who sees a problem with yourself is you?"

The tears weren't stopping, damn it.

"But-"

"Y/n shut the fuck up."

San didn't even say anything. Just one glare at Woo and he was always looking away. San turned your attention from Wooyoung to him. "I love you everyday, I love you all the time. So it baffles me why you do this to yourself." He lowered the duvet from your chest and grabbed your arms. You looked at him like he made you. "I love you." He kissed the top of your left breast. "I love you." He kissed the other. "And I love... you." Then finally your lips.

You felt Wooyoung move behind you after he heard you sob. He too sat on San's legs, hugging you from the back. His head was buried in your neck as he inhaled your scent deeply. If he couldn't offer support verbally, he sure could offer it physically. You sat there as both your boyfriends both hugged you as you sobbed. And you felt so full inside. Sure, San's advice and reassurance didn't just work immediately. He knew this would take you a while to get over. But you also knew that you would overcome these thoughts. And feel good about yourself to love yourself.

"Besides, you can wear certain outfits that people with bigger boobs can't, you know."

"Woo."

"What San I'm right and you know it."

That managed to make you chuckle a bit. I mean, yeah, he was right.

You completely miss the mischievous look that Woo gives San.

"Since Y/n doesn't appreciate herself, what so you say we show her how much we love her?" He says as he grabs your tits from behind, pinching your nipples. You look at his hands on your chest, and begin to get nervous.

San smirks past you. "Woo, that's like the only thing you've said today that has made sense."

Wooyoung bursts out laughing instead of being annoyed as San leans forward to kiss you. He truly couldn't have asked for a better night.

•••

Note: I'm not at all dissing girlies with bigger boobs. The point was that you should learn to be kinder to yourself and love yourself, for there is literally no one that's you. That is all. 🫶

[cosette141]

Begin Again (OUAT fanfic) | Chapter 8

Fandom: Once Upon A Time

Author: cosette141

Pairing: Captain Swan

Words: 5k (this chapter) | 45k (total, so far)

Summary: (s2 "Manhattan" divergence) No one breaks a deal with Rumplestiltskin, and Emma finds herself facing the wrath of the Dark One. What if Neal didn't come back for Emma in NYC, but instead, Hook showed up to kill Rumplestiltskin early? No one has ever saved Emma before, and Hook has never been able to save anyone at all. It's time for them both to tell a different story. Together. CS

Chp 8: Read on Ao3

Chapter 8

a/n: I split this chapter up because it was getting obscenely long. So here's 5k of fluff. ;)

Emma has never been more comfortable in her life.

Warmth and a distinct feeling of safe was wrapped around her, holding her close. Her eyes slowly fluttered open, blinking against the soft rays of daylight shining in through the window.

And she lay there for a moment, never once having slept so restfully.

A sense of calm coursed through her like the morning mist rolling off the sea. As she continued to wake, she blinked, eyes recognizing the cabin—Killian's cabin.

The slight surprise woke her even more, realizing where she was, and only made her realize even more where she ended up.

Or, more accurately, with whom.

Emma quickly realized the warmth was in fact Killian, who was lying on his back, and she had somehow come to use him as a pillow. Her face was resting against his chest, feeling every slow rise and fall of his breathing. Their hands were intertwined over him, and his left arm was wrapped snugly around her back, holding her close. His head was lying against hers, his nose buried in her hair.

Emma felt herself smile, turning a little to see him.

He was still asleep, his eyes shut, his face so peaceful. She was so used to seeing the intricate expressions in his face, so often a tortured sort of pain that held every one of his years that didn't show in his appearance otherwise.

But in sleep, it was all erased, leaving behind the person Emma has come to know. Holding every bit of the sort of innocence and the hope that had been in his voice last night.

Hope that had wrapped around her own heart, just as warm as Killian's embrace.

"I'd like to see the world with you, love."

Emma couldn't think of anything she'd want to do more, nor anyone better to do so with.

She was becoming more and more certain that Henry was right, that happy endings have returned.

And Killian was hers.

Emma smiled, eyes still on his face, and slowly, she untangled her fingers from his, using them instead to brush the hair over his forehead where it had fallen.

He shifted at her touch, though didn't wake, and Emma felt his arm pull her closer to him, making a soft giggle escape her—which surprised even her, because she can't remember the last time she'd made such a sound—if ever. Never would she have thought, when she'd met Captain Hook in the Enchanted Forest, that he'd be one for cuddling. Nor that she'd adore being the one in his arms.

Seems he's hidden his true self away the same way she has for nearly his whole life.

Yet, as she watched him, his brows twitched, and his eyes opened. It took him a moment to come to wakefulness, a softness to his face even before he did, like the sense of calm she'd woken with enveloped him as well. But his eyes fell to their clasped hands first, surprise jumping into his eyes before they snapped to her, still looking at him, her smile only wider.

And the look that overcame him, this expression between joy and disbelief, sent a warmth that touched every nerve in Emma's body.

"Morning," whispered Emma through her smile, and his widened. He lifted his hand from hers, brushing her hair behind her ear, and it made a heat touch Emma's cheeks, realizing he'd unknowingly done the exact same gesture she'd just done with him. His thumb settled on her cheek, brushing over her skin. With a grin that held a hint of the pirate in him, he said, "Your father's going to kill me."

Emma laughed, laying her head back on his chest, his hand falling to her back as she settled back into the comfort of his warmth. "Maybe we should just run away now," she mused.

It was his turn to laugh, his fingers running through her hair. "Aye, aye, captain." he whispered, kissing her hair. They were quiet for a moment, simply basking in each other, when he said, "I like waking up to you."

Emma's fingers played with the collar of his shirt, and she hummed. "Me, too," she agreed softly. "Worth having David chase you around town for it?" she joked.

"Sweetheart, you are worth it and more." he said with another kiss to the top of her head, his voice holding every bit of sincerity. Her eyes opened, finding his. "I'd do absolutely anything to be with you." he said softly, eyes holding an unwavering truth, a devotion.

And it made her eyes burn a little, because no one, not one soul, has ever said anything like that to her before.

"So would I," she whispered back, smiling, and he returned it, pulling her to him for a kiss, and Emma never wanted to leave this bed.

But some reality slipped in between kisses, and Emma pulled away, seeing the absolute boyish grin on his face, his arms wrapped snugly around her waist, and Emma smiled at it. She sat up a little, and he loosened his arms instantly to let her, and it would never cease being absolutely touching how much he respected her comfort zone.

"Regina's dropping Henry off at the loft this afternoon." she said, biting her lip. "I think it might be a good idea to… tell him about us," she said, eyes flicking to his.

Killian grinned, slipping his left arm to fold behind his head. "Tell him what exactly?"

But Emma lifted her brow, setting her jaw a little at the very Hook-like expression on his face, something she could only describe as shit-eating. "You just want to hear me say it, don't you." she deadpanned.

His grin grew.

He wasn't going to be the one to say it, to give them any sort of a title, placing nearly every piece of control into her hands, and hers alone.

She would never, ever get over just how much he seemed to understand her.

For so long, commitment was a terrifying thing. She hadn't dated a single person since Neal, and never thought she would again.

But this was different. He was different.

And she suddenly didn't have that fear anymore.

So Emma leaned back over him, saying through her own grin, "That I have a very sexy pirate boyfriend."

And it made the expression of his fade a little, traded for surprise, like he hadn't expected her to truly say it.

To commit.

But it only faltered for a second, returning with something that mixed rich genuinity into mischief, an expression he could trademark, and he brushed her hair behind her ear again. "I do hope that is how you phrase it to the lad."

Emma laughed, kissing him again before untangling herself from him. Back on their feet, Emma said, "It's… it's probably better if I go home… myself," she said, wincing a little at both the idea and the chill of it. "I'd rather David doesn't kill you."

"I'm a survivor, love," he said, thumb brushing over her cheek again. "No need to worry about me."

Emma smiled from the heat at his touch. "I prefer not testing that theory more than once in a week." she said wryly. "How about you meet me and Henry at Granny's in an hour for lunch?"

He smiled, kissing her once more, softly. "As you wish." he whispered.

She smiled right back.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Despite Emma's insistence that he didn't have to, Killian walked her home, kissing her on the cheek at the end of the block with a whisper to see her soon. Yet when he walked away, even just for the short time it will be, it still felt like a part of her had gone with him.

But remembering Henry, Emma climbed the stairs to the loft.

She opened the door cautiously, praying that no one was home, because all of a sudden she felt the distinct sense of the walk of shame. She slowly poked her head in…

…to find the loft empty.

She breathed out in relief at avoiding another awkward conversation.

There was a note on the table, however, and Emma picked it up.

Morning Emma!

David and I will be gone most of the afternoon to plan how we're going to restore the Kingdom. See you later!

- Mary Margaret

P.S. David convinced himself you took a very long walk alone last night. But I hope you two had a wonderful time. You deserve it.

Emma felt both a wince and a smile touch her face at the bottom of the note, but something hollow settled into her chest. As much as she'd worried that she'd have to have an awkward conversation with Mary Margaret and David about last night, the fact that they weren't here for it felt… empty.

And not for the first time, she wished things were different between them.

But a knock at the door shook away the thoughts, and Emma threw the note in the trash before answering it.

Regina was standing behind it, with Henry at her side. "Good morning," said Regina, lips in a tight smile. But this time, it wasn't because of forced kindness. It was more uncomfortable, it was trying.

"Morning," said Emma, a genuine smile. It certainly felt good to be on the same page with Regina now, and the fact that the woman gave up the throne for Henry made Emma realize just how much she did care for Henry.

"Morning!" said Henry excitedly. But his brows kneaded as he looked at Emma, saying confusedly, "Weren't you wearing that yesterday?"

Heat rushed to Emma's cheeks.

And Regina's lifted brow at that only made it worse.

"You hungry?" asked Emma instead to Henry.

He smiled. "Starving!"

"Good," said Emma, ruffling his hair. "We're meeting your Captain at Granny's in a little bit."

Henry's eyes lit up. "Awesome!" He then quickly hugged Regina with a "Bye, Mom!" and zipped up the stairs with a shout of, "I'm gonna get ready!"

Emma laughed a little, and Regina had a little amused tilt to her lips as well, surprising Emma to see it. "Henry spent half the night talking about Hook," said Regina wryly. "You two seem to be getting… close."

Emma's face flushed even hotter.

But Regina's expression softened a little, saying, "He also told us what really happened in New York." Emma barely caught the flinch before it showed. "Give the pirate my thanks for protecting Henry." Emma felt a little of the smile of hers come back, at the acceptance for Killian spreading through everyone. "I am glad you're all right, Miss. Swan." A pause, then, "Emma."

"Thanks," whispered Emma, stunned by the gesture.

And the honesty in the woman's eyes.

With a goodbye, Regina left, and Emma closed the door.

After getting changed and freshening up, spending more time on her clothing choice and her hair than she has in years, Emma found Henry fitting his storybook into his backpack.

"Hey, kid," she said, sitting on the edge of his bed, next to his backpack. "Can I ask you something?"

He finished zipping his backpack, looking at her, brows lifting at the slight nervousness in her voice. Brows kneading, he said, "Yeah, anything."

"How do you feel about the idea of me…" She trailed off, fingers fidgeting with each other. Life was a lot easier when she had walls to block the emotions.

However easier, it wasn't better.

"The idea of…?" prompted Henry.

Emma took a breath. Swallowing, she said, "The idea of… me… dating someone?"

His brows soared. "You're dating someone?"

Emma bit her lip.

"You are!" he said at her expression, smiling wide. "Who is it?"

Biting her lip harder, Emma hesitantly said, "...Hook."

The moment Hook left her mouth, Henry froze.

Emma suddenly felt dread in her chest.

Until Henry broke out in the biggest grin she's ever seen him wear.

And relief coursed through her, making her smile too.

"Is that… okay with you?" asked Emma, unable to keep the hope out of her voice.

"Okay?!" exclaimed Henry, shooting to his feet. "It's more than okay! It's awesome!"

Emma's smile reached her eyes. "You like him a lot too, huh," she mused through her smile.

"He's so cool," gushed Henry, only making Emma's smile wider. But his smile softened a little, into that maturity that no other eleven-year-old had, and he said, "Just for the record, I'm okay with anything that makes you happy."

Emma felt tears touch her eyes, pulling Henry into her arms, hugging him tight. He hugged her back just as tightly. "I love you so much, kid," she whispered.

"I love you, too," he said right back. "But I really am hungry."

Emma laughed, pulling back, feeling a weight lifted off her chest. "All right, let's go," she said, standing and Henry gathered his backpack.

And Emma had a feeling she wasn't the only one about to feel even lighter.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Killian didn't expect the level of nervousness he currently felt, leaning against the fence outside the 'Granny's' tavern.

Yesterday, he'd been tentative enough when it was Emma's parents' approval of him on the line, something he still couldn't quite believe he'd earned (earned to a point). For he was certain that if he did happen upon the prince any time soon, he'd be getting another fist to the face, or at least a glare that packed just as much of a punch. But Killian was not against Emma having a protective father—the more people to protect her, in his mind, the better. Though he was set to remain firmly at the top of that list.

However, the idea of getting Emma's child's approval…

…was something entirely different.

Killian knew by now—something that still stunned him to no end—that Henry was a fan of him. That night in New York had created a palpable bond between the three of them, something Killian felt to his core. He'd protect both of them with his life, again and again and again.

But just because Henry liked him, didn't necessarily mean he thought he was good enough for his mother, or that he even liked the idea of anyone being with his mother.

And it only flashed him back to Neverland, to the few months he'd had Baelfire aboard. Certainly now that Killian knew the extent of what Baelfire did as an adult tainted his image of the boy, for he never would have thought the boy was capable of something as heartless as what he did to Emma.

Hell, when he met Baelfire, the young lad had told him he'd only ended up in Neverland to save another child from the same fate.

And with a sharp stab of guilt, Killian wondered if his terrible decision to let Bae into Pan's clutches had played a part in the terrible man he'd become.

But as someone who had been wronged by many people, and for many years had firmly placed the blame in the hands of others for the man Hook had become, Killian had gained quite a bit of wisdom over his many years. At some point, one's choices are his own and the man one becomes is his own doing. Killian would forever feel the guilt of how he handled his relationship with young Bae, but as far as he was concerned, the man Baelfire grew into had zero excuses when it came to how he treated Emma.

Killian had, however, been with Baelfire, been someone the lad had looked up to for quite some time, and it had felt so good. When he'd told Bae that he would make good on Milah's and his plan to go back for him, to raise Bae as his own, he'd been truthful. In that moment, his care for the boy had rivaled his need for revenge.

It made him realize just how much he wanted a child in his life.

To now have Henry look at him the same way that Bae did in those first few weeks…

Killian took a breath, shutting his eyes.

He would not make the same mistake twice.

He's come to care for Henry even more than he'd once cared for Bae, in such a shorter amount of time, and the fact that Henry was Bae's son was something Killian still couldn't exactly wrap his head around.

This was Killian's chance to make up for what he should have done all those years ago.

As well as for him to gain something he'd never thought was still a possibility for him: happiness.

Emma and Henry were his purpose, his future, and it was brighter than he could have ever imagined.

Killian was only waiting a few minutes before he saw Emma and Henry. He straightened.

"Captain!" cried Henry, running toward him, giving him a hug just as big as the one he'd given him yesterday.

And it would never not take him by surprise, warming his chest as he settled his hand on the boy's shoulder, smiling. "Nice to see you again as well, lad."

Over Henry's head, Killian looked at Emma, giving her a little unsure expression, to which Emma bit her lip. "I… already told him," she admitted.

Killian expression went blank in shock.

Henry knew?

And he…

…embraced him?

Henry pulled back then, giving Killian a huge grin. "I think it's awesome that you and Mom are together!"

Killian blinked in shock. "You… do?" he breathed.

"What isn't awesome about it?" he asked, brows kneaded in honest confusion.

Killian couldn't remember how to speak.

"Does this mean I get my own cabin on the Jolly Roger?" asked Henry eagerly. "Can we go sailing every day? Can we—"

"Take it easy, kid," said Emma with a smile. "How about you start with getting us a table?"

"On it!" said Henry excitedly, running inside.

Killian still felt utterly frozen.

Henry approved of him.

Him.

Emma's hand suddenly slipped into his, tearing his attention from his shock. She was smiling at him. "He's almost as happy about us as I am," she said softly.

And more shock was flooding in, at Emma's openness, the fact that her emotions were so free.

He smiled. "No one more than I," he whispered, kissing her something soft and quick. He watched color touch the tip of her nose, and he smiled.

Emma smiled too.

And Killian would never stop being awed by it, a smile that he'd never seen from her before New York. Her smile had always had a reason, it was a wall of its own, never from joy.

This one was so open and free and it was the way a smile was supposed to be: to show happiness.

And the fact that he seemed to be eliciting this rare smile from her was something he only wanted to do more and more.

They both walked inside, seeing Henry at one of the tables by the window. As they entered, a few of the patrons looked up at the sound of the door chime, and at the sight of him, he saw at least half of them tense, like a reflex. But as one, relaxed, and Killian didn't exactly know how to handle such acceptance and approval from so many people.

He didn't deserve it, but he would cherish it for the rest of his days.

Emma and Hook slid into the seat across from where Henry was sitting.

When they did, Henry was already sipping a drink from a mug. "I ordered for us," said Henry. "Grilled cheese for you," said Henry to Emma.

"With—" she began, but Henry just smiled and said, "Onion rings, got it."

Lifting a brow to Emma, he asked, "Cooked… cheese?"

Emma again tried to hide a smile. "When you put it like that, the name is pretty misleading." she said with a furrow of her brows. "Bread and cheese, pretty much, is what it is."

"I ordered the Captain a hamburger," said Henry with a wide grin.

Killian opened his mouth to question it, but Emma just put a hand on his arm to stop him. "Bread and meat." At the furrow in Killian's own brow, she said, "We put pretty much everything we can on bread. Welcome to America."

Not long after Emma and Henry attempted explaining this America and the basic geography of this realm, making him even more curious about exploring it further, their food arrived.

Killian had to admit, he'd been unsure about the new foods—he'd fished for his food while he'd been in town—but he was pleasantly surprised with the tastes. The 'french fries' that Henry dove into first were quite delectable.

After they ate, Henry looked at Killian. "Captain?"

"I appreciate the respect, lad," said Killian with a grin, "but you're free to call me Killian, if you'd like." And it was strange, saying his name, not having spoken it, introduced himself, as Killian since he was nearly Henry's age.

Henry seemed to think about it for half a second, but shook his head. "It's more fun to call you Captain." he said with a grin, making Killian and Emma laugh.

"Aye, then," he said.

"Can I ask you some questions?" asked Henry.

"Anything you'd like," said Killian honestly.

Henry unzipped his backpack and pulled out a large book. "The storybook doesn't say a lot about your life," he said, putting the book on the table, opening it to a page that Henry seemed to know by heart. Killian felt his brows shoot up, seeing a distinctly accurate painting of him at the wheel of the Jolly Roger, displaying his hook. Briefly, Killian realized this must have been the book that Henry referred to having seen his ship.

At Killian's surprise, Emma said, "The book is magic. It includes real life events of pretty much everyone who lives in town."

A magic book that features him?

Suddenly that was a worrisome idea, for too much of his life was less than… good.

And just as suddenly, he felt a cold fear at the idea of Emma knowing just what he's done in his life. She's forgiven what he's done since she's known him, but what he's done, period?

His chest suddenly hurt.

"All it says about you," said Henry, "is how you lost your hand," Killian felt himself tense a little, his left arm flinching, "and that you went to Neverland. It doesn't really say a lot about you, or Peter Pan."

Besides the initial relief of what the book lacked about him, the sheer name of the little devil made him tense, and Emma felt it. "Right," said Emma with a sigh. "He's real too, huh? Annoying kid?" she asked with a little grin.

"More like a little bloody devil," muttered Killian.

"The happy-go-lucky kid who just wants to stay young forever?" asked Emma, brows raising.

"The real Peter Pan isn't like the Disney Peter Pan," said Henry with a little seriousness.

"Disney?" echoed Killian.

"Wait, seriously?" asked Emma. Henry turned a page, and she saw a very dark drawing of a boy that looked quite more sinister than the Peter Pan from the film she's seen dozens of times. "Did Disney get anything right?" Emma asked Henry.

"What's 'Disney'?" asked Killian again, looking between them.

Emma lifted her head, looking at him. "Um, long story short, it's where I first heard of fairytale stuff." At his continued puzzlement, she said, "It's what I believed about Jack and the Beanstalk before you told me what actually happened."

"Sounds like a lovely tale. But the real story is a bit more gruesome."

"Ah," said Killian. Looking back at the book, he lifted his brow. "You're saying," he said slowly, "that in this realm, my story is considered a fairytale?"

"Everyone's, actually." said Emma. "Disney made a bunch of movies—" Killian's brow lifted. Emma looked to Henry, like she didn't know how to explain it.

"Moving pictures that look like real life, kinda like a theatre show but as drawings," supplied Henry.

"Yeah, that," said Emma with a smile. "They're usually made for kids to watch. One of them is yours."

His brow lifted more. "So you've known of me since you were young?"

"Uh, a version of you," said Emma, looking like she was trying not to smile.

"Most have taken to calling me by my more colorful moniker: Hook."

"As in… Captain Hook?"

"Ah, so you've heard of me."

"That was how you'd heard of me when we met?" asked Killian in disbelief. He'd simply guessed his reputation had preceded him.

"Yeah," said Emma with that smile. "But the, um, movie-version of you looks nothing like you." At more of his confusion, she said, "It's a compliment, believe me."

But Henry smiled a wry grin, saying, "We gotta have a movie night."

Killian still didn't quite understand what that meant—as well as not exactly keen on seeing this less-handsome version of himself—but anything with these two was something he wanted to do.

"When you were in Neverland, did you see mermaids and sirens and stuff?" asked Henry eagerly.

"Too many," said Hook honestly. "They're some of the most vile creatures I've come across."

"Mermaids?" echoed Emma. "Mermaids are evil now?"

"You've a lot to learn," said Killian, smiling.

Henry turned a few pages, as if looking for something, but Killian caught something on one of the pages that made him say, "What's this?"

Henry looked at him, then turned back the page as if to see what Killian saw, and when he did, Henry grinned. "Mom's story," he said, looking from the page displaying a painted scene of what looked like the Prince, holding a swaddled baby, a name stitched in the cloth reading Emma.

And Killian suddenly realized he knew very little about Emma's story.

All he did know was that Emma was some sort of Savior, that she'd grown up alone outside the curse that froze everyone in town for thirty years, including her parents. It was certainly something he was sure was strange: to meet one's parents and be of the same physical age.

"May I hear this story?" he asked tentatively, eyes on Emma, not wanting to push the vulnerability she's already given so much of.

She met his eyes, the interest in them, and she smiled hesitant permission, like it touched her that he wanted to know.

"It's my favorite story of all," said Henry with a grin, and Killian saw Emma's lips widen, the smile becoming a little less hesitant. Pointing to the picture, where David's expression was grim, Henry said, "Mom was born the night the Dark Curse was enacted. She was prophesied to be the Savior, the one to break the curse." Henry turned the page, displaying David setting baby Emma in a wardrobe—something that rang a bell, as the one Cora had taken the ashes from for its enchantment. "Emma wouldn't be able to break the Curse if she got swept up in it too, so Grandma and Grandpa had to send her through the wardrobe to this world so she could meet her destiny…"

With a wide grin to Emma, Henry went on, explaining the story of how he received the storybook and found Emma in a village he called Boston. The tale was quite incredible, and Killian only thought more and more what a tough lass Emma truly was. It also filled in many of the holes in his understanding—why Regina had ended up with Henry, why Emma was this Savior, and how Emma had ended up in the Enchanted Forest.

Back then, on the Beanstalk, Killian had known Emma was trying to get back to her child, but only now he understood just how important, how strong her mission truly had been.

And more than that, hearing her story only reminded him of just how far they'd come.

And from the smile on her lips, and the way her fingers tightened around his, she felt just the same.

"I'm still jealous Mom and Grandma got to see the Enchanted Forest," said Henry, tucking the storybook back into his backpack.

"Jealous?" echoed Emma with a lift of her brow. "Kid, the place was crawling with killer ogres."

"Cool," breathed Henry.

Emma just shook her head and Killian laughed.

But Emma looked at Killian before looking back at Henry, saying, "Well, when the beans are ready… I'm sure your Captain wouldn't mind taking us on some adventures."

Henry's eyes widened. "Really?!"

"Aye," said Killian, smiling at Henry's enthusiasm.

"Can we start with today?" asked Henry eagerly. "I wanna go sailing!" To Emma— "Can we?!"

"I don't see why not," said Emma, trading a smile with Killian. She released Killian's fingers, reaching for something, then cursed under her breath. "I forgot my cash in the car," she said.

But Killian straightened. "I can pay, love," he said.

But Emma rolled her eyes. "Yeah, Granny's doesn't take doubloons." Standing, she said, "I'll be right back."

Emma walked outside, smiling to herself.

The afternoon couldn't get more perfect.

She found her car where she parked it at the corner, since apparently everyone was at Granny's today, and she grabbed her wallet from the center console. She shut her door, about to head back to the diner when she heard something that sent an icy chill down her spine, making her freeze.

"Emma?"

She whipped around, jaw dropping because she knew that voice, absolute dread filling her chest, mixing with the shock.

But her ears weren't wrong.

He was standing there, right behind her.

Here.

In Storybrooke.

It couldn't be.

Neal.

-.-.-.-.-.

A/N:

So it’s been brought to my attention that not everyone is happy to have Neal in this story, and the last thing I would want to do is taint this story. I honestly wrote it as a oneshot and never intended to continue it past a chapter or two, and now here we are and it’s become a really special story for me, and it means a lot that you guys like it too. I still want to continue this story, but I don’t want to ruin this story for the people who aren’t fans of Neal (even though this story will continuously be anti-Neal, and Neal will only be in it temporarily). 

So, I’m going to continue this story in a sequel story instead. :)

This story has sort of become a what-if that I started planning to take through different arcs of the show. Not all of them, but I had an idea for one that I was pretty excited about, but Neal will be a temporary character in it. This arc will include some conflict and angst (no love triangle crap or anything like that though). But in typical OUAT fashion, crises happen. And as much fun as the fluff and comfort has been to write, I’ve been itching to throw some conflict in there to not only strengthen Emma’s and Killian’s relationship (ensuing more h/c and fluff later), but to fix Emma’s relationship with her parents as well, something I wish had happened in the actual show. If I didn't have this next part, I would have ended this story about a chapter ago, but I'm not quite ready to give it up just yet. I fully intend for captain swan to have a happy ending, but I’m having a lot of fun playing with this what-if idea and seeing what could change in canon. But the last thing I want is to ruin it with more conflict for those who don’t want it.

So, for now, I’ll leave this story as it is, but when I post that sequel story, I’ll update a chapter here (another a/n) so you know when to look for it if you want to continue along for the ride. When I post the sequel, I’ll delete the very last section of Chapter 7 in this story, where Neal comes in, as well as Chapter 8, and put them in the sequel story instead. That way, if you want to skip how I’m going to continue this story, you can imagine that as the ending of this story.

Writing this story has been one of the most fun times in my fanfic-writing experience, so I definitely wouldn’t want to taint it or anything for anyone, but I definitely still want to play with these versions of the characters. So thank you guys so much for reading and for all your kind comments and your encouragement to keep the story going—you’re the reason it’s still here :) 

See you with the sequel soon! 

tag list: @teamhook @jrob64 @kmomof4 @justanother-unluckysoul @klynn-stormz @stahlop @ilovemesomekillianjones @hookmecaptain @fleurdepetite @tiganasummertree @jadehowlettthewolf @jonesfandomfanatic @anmylica @pirateprincessofpizza @stahlop @snowbellewells @eddisfargo @motherkatereloyshipper @confessionsofthemword @sotangledupinit

[wintrgarden]

a latte for your thoughts?

// a fan fiction dedicated to the winter garden couple of hospital playlist //

-----

"Ikjun, do you have my warm cup of hot latte?" Jeong won said, while walking towards him in the hospital's open space to take a break during his night shift.

"Here. Isn't it tiring in the PICU these days?" Ikjun replied with worried eyes.

"A little. I don't mind it though.

Yah, do you remember my liver transplant patient, Mina?"

"Yeah, the one where we had to cut the donor's liver to a quarter because it won't fit the tiny baby's body. What about her?"

"I went to her a while ago. She woke up, and winked at me like this!" Jeongwon lit up whenever he talks about his patients' recovery. His eyes sparkled and his smile widened. He repeated the wink so much that it could have been mistaken for a blink. In fact, he was so giddy that he didn't notice someone approaching.

"Professor Ikjun? The test results of patient Jiwon are out. Could you take a look at it?"

Jang Gyeoul, the third year resident of General Surgery has been standing there for a few moments, waiting for the two professors to actually notice.

While hiding his laugh, Ikjun followed suit. Jeongwon was left on the bench with an unwavering smile on his face.

Looking at him, one would think that his drink was too sweet to make him smile like that. Eavesdropping on their conversation would transform him into a humanitarian. But to delve into his thoughts --- now that, that's a different story.

It's nice to actually see an angel, once in a while. Just enough to keep me on my feet. I might be even enthralled by its eyes that don't wink but are enveloped with fascinating halo-like things. Even if this angel doesn't have wings, it has the most power to chase evil away. I wasn't sure if this angel could save me --- until it actually did.

------

"Yah, Ahn Jeongwon, are you sleeping here again?" Junwan said, while entering their shared office.

"O~ I just finished my night shift. I just lied down."

"Have you eaten?"

"I'll eat later."

"I also haven't eaten yet. Let's eat breakfast."

"Will you stop bugging me if I eat?" Junwan then pulled Jeongwon out of the cot, and dragged him to the packed cafeteria to fall in line.

------

"One iced latte, please. Oh, and a sandwich."

With the same baggy eyes and pale skin, Gyeoul was ordering her morning coffee. Just enough to keep her awake until she gets home.

"Annyeonghaseyo~" She greeted the two professors.

"De~" Jeongwon said, while Junwan nodded in response.

CODE BLUE --- CS. 3RD FLOOR. CODE BLUE --- CS. 3RD FLOOR.

Without a beat, Junwan, a Cardiothoracic Surgery Professor, left hurriedly. Jeongwon was then left alone. Gyeoul took her order and searched for a seat.

"One warm cup of hot latte and a pancake, please."

After getting his order, Jeongwon followed through and tried to find his way in the crowd. It was full of doctors and nurses waiting to start their morning shifts, so the noise was understandable.

"Professor! Here!" Gyeoul pointed to a newly vacant seat in front of her. The morning rush got the best of them that Jeongwon didn't think twice and made his way.

The crowd was boisterous. Jeongwon and Gyeoul's silence was awkward. It was not the kind of environment you'd want after a 12-hour shift.

But it was all worth it. At least for one of them.

"How was the Emergency Room last night?" Jeongwon blurted after taking a bite of his pancake.

"It's okay. There were a lot of unpredictable cases, most of which were tiring, as usual." Gyeoul's detailed answer was so calm. It seemed that the Professor's unexpected friendliness didn't bother her.

"Do you have someone to take you home?"

"What? No. I can go by myself." With a polite tone, Gyeoul showed her surprise with the question.

"I'll give you a ride home."

"No, you don't need to---"

"I insist. I still haven't bought you the meal you asked from me, anyway. Can a ride home suffice?"

Gyeoul was bewildered. But with the professor's kind nature, it seemed like something he would do for literally anyone. He wasn't called the "Buddha" for nothing, anyway.

-----

"It's that apartment on the right, Professor."

"This one?"

"Yes. Thank you for the ride."

"It's not a problem. The next time we catch ourselves on a rough patch, I can take you home again."

Gyeoul smiled. Her first that day. Then, she opened the door to get out.

"Oh, shit! I forgot!" The car stopped. Jeongwon's shock even surprised Gyeoul.

"Why, Professor? What happened?"

"I totally forgot about it. I was scheduled to get my car battery change the other week, then I forgot and was planning to do it today."

Sleeping in the cot that morning wasn't just to save time to rest up. He actually had long, overdue chores and was saving some energy to do them.

"Do you have a contact to a car battery seller?" Gyeoul asked.

"Yeah, I'll contact them now."

It was still early in the morning, around 6 o'clock. The service opened at 9 o'clock, so delivery wasn't possible after an hour or so.

Gyeoul stayed with him until things got settled. It was getting chilly, and the overwhelming fatigue got the best out of Jeongwon.

"Professor, you could rest a little in my place... if you like. You can sleep while waiting."

Jeongwon hesitated a bit, but decided to give in.

------

"I'll just get an extra pillow and some blankets." said Gyeoul, while Jeongwon helped in fixing the convertible sofa bed in her living room.

Once fixed, he sat and removed his shoes.

"You live alone?" he asked Gyeoul once she got back.

"Yes, for a while now." she replied as she handed him the pillow.

"Ah, I see."

"I'll just be in my room. You can call me if you need anything."

"Thank you... Also, I'm sorry for being so troublesome." His shy look gave him away.

"It's nothing, don't worry." Gyeoul smiled, and went into her room.

Jeongwon lied down. He couldn't believe what was happening --- and how the situation could naturally give a wrong impression. If he told Ikjun about this, he would make fun of him and joke about how he got things to escalate so quickly. Junwan would tap him on the back and commend him for finally picking up some tricks of his. Songhwa would be very much amused, and would romanticize the whole situation. Meanwhile, Seokhyeong would remind him that he's an OB-GYN Professor, and that he delivers babies very well. He would be of service to Jeongwon if ever he needed one.

His thoughts started to tone down, and after no time, he was asleep.

-------

"Professor?"

......

"Professor? I fixed some lunch. Do you want to eat?" Gyeoul wore an apron over some loose shirt and pajamas now, and sun was already high up.

Jeongwon looked at his wrist watch.

2:24 PM.

He quickly sat up.

"I'm sorry, did the service arrive? I must have been in a deep sleep."

"Yes, they arrived a few hours ago. I tried to wake you, but you were soundly asleep."

"I'm really sorry. You had to pay them, didn't you? I'll just pay you back."

"The receipts are there, over the table."

Jeongwon went to get them, and was distracted with the smell of food coming from the kitchen.

"Professor, I fixed some lunch for us, if you want to eat..."

He felt ashamed to take another offer, but hearing his stomach grumble made him look the other way, again.

Gyeoul was already fixing the table for two, while Jeongwon sat quietly and contemplated how much trouble he caused her all in a single day.

"I'm really sorry... I meant to wake up, seriously. I was just really tired from last night."

"It's okay." Gyeoul said with a chuckle. "I'm not holding anything against you, Professor." she added as she handed out his chopsticks.

"Thank you for the meal." he then said.

Everything was new to Ahn Jeongwon. He didn't need to wipe the table, or arrange the food, or even wear an apron. He didn't even need to worry if he was going to get enough food, as everything was already at his disposal. This new scenario keeps him gushing.

Being alone with a girl, in her apartment, eating her cooked food, and feeling something that only grown-ups alone in an enclosed space would feel. It wasn't like this was the first time something like this is happening, he often said to himself. It somehow eased his discomfort.

All while knowing the truth that this is in fact the first time.

But it's not like Jeongwon didn't have the opportunity and ability to; he just chose not to. His faith led him to a different path, and he was decisive to go this way. For the longest time, this weighed more than any choice he had to make in his life. But this time, something, or perhaps someone, was gonna tip the scale.

-----

"Yah! Jang Gyeoul! What's this?" Chu Minha screamed as Gyeoul entered the GS Department, in time for another night shift.

Someone left iced latte for her. With a double bacon sandwich. And some patches to ease pain. It came with a written note, saying:

"To my Good Samaritan. Thank you~

---- Ahn Jeongwon"

The handwriting made Gyeoul smile.

"Why did Pediatric Surgeon Prof. Ahn Jeongwon gave you coffee? And why are you smiling?"

"Nothing. It's just to repay a good deed."

"That's the most vague yet unsuspicious answer I've ever heard! Good deeds really cannot be questioned at all. I wish someone would also give me coffee." Minha wouldn't stop, but Gyeoul wasn't listening either.

She focused on the note. And the coffee. And the sandwich.

While remembering the long day with Ahn Jeongwon.

[camrenanalysis]

Consequences Lyrics - Deep analysis

Today I’m going to do an analysis of the lyrics of the song Consequences (later on I’m doing an analysis of the music video as well). I just want to make it very clear that all of this is based in my personal opinion, so feel free to disagree or agree with it. I honestly see this song in a different way that most people see, so let’s go.

Consequences

Dirty tissues, trust issues

Glasses on the sink, they didn't fix you

Lonely pillows in a stranger's bed

Little voices in my head

Secret keeping, stop the bleeding

Lost a little weight because I wasn't eating

All the souls that I can't listen to, to tell the truth

Loving you was young, and wild, and free

Loving you was cool, and hot, and sweet

Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound

A steady place to let down my defenses

But loving you had consequences

Hesitation, awkward conversation

Running on low expectation

Every siren that I was ignoring

I'm paying for it

Loving you was young, and wild, and free

Loving you was cool, and hot, and sweet

Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound

A steady place to let down my defenses

But loving you had consequences

No, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Said, no, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Hey, yeah, no, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, mm

Loving you was dumb, dark, and cheap

Loving you will still take shots at me

Found loving you was sunshine, but then it poured

And I lost so much more than my senses

'Cause loving you had consequences

Yeah, loving you 

So let’s analyse this verse to verse.

In the first verse:

Dirty tissues, trust issues

When she says “dirty tissues” I think she’s saying that she’s crying about the situation that she’s living in, that’s why these tissues are dirty with her tears. “Trust issues” not very much to add about it, but we can see that she’s crying and having trouble with trust issues with this person.

Glasses on the sink, they didn't fix you

“Glasses on the sink” a reference of drinking alcohol and how it “didn’t fix you”. For me in this part, she’s saying that she (and probably her partner as well) tried to forget the pain that she was facing with drinks, but she realized that it didn’t work out, the pain didn’t go away.

Lonely pillows in a stranger's bed

“Lonely pillows” could mean that she’s sleeping without this person in hotel rooms ("stranger’s bed”), probably because of the troubles they are facing in their relationship.

Little voices in my head

Secret keeping, stop the bleeding

This is probably one of my favorite lyrics of this song, it literally gives me chills everytime I hear it, in spite of this part being very sad, it’s so genuine and honest. In my opinion, this the first clear reference that this song is about Lauren. “Little voices in my head” could mean us, CS, that knows the truth about them or her own conscious feeling bad about the “secret keeping” situation, or a combination of both of these situations. “Secret keeping, stop the bleeding” now we can see that this relationship with this partner is having problems because of a secret, when she says “stop the bleeding” I see it as a situation where you try to hide something even if it’s starting to show and it’s hurting yourself because of this secret, you CAN’T show it to people, you have to stop the bleeding, you can’t show that you’re hurt, after all it’s a secret. Blood here is a metaphor of feeling something deeply, but because it’s a secret you can’t express it, you have to stop it, you have stanch the blood, you have to hide it.

Lost a little weight because I wasn't eating

This is line for me is very literal, she’s saying that she lost weight because she wasn’t eating, probably because of how sad she was feeling, she couldn’t even eat right.

All the souls that I can't listen to, to tell the truth 

One of my favorites lyrics as well. “All the souls that i CAN’T listen to, to tell the TRUTH”. It’s such a simple verse, but carries with it such a deep meaning. She can’t listen to these souls that knows the truth about her relationship, or at least suspect about it, but why? Because it’s a secret relationship. That’s why she can’t show the hurt she is facing with hidding it, that’s why she have to stop the bleeding. I also love how in this part of the song, she sings with a pause in it, it looks like she literally respected the comma there,”All the souls that I can't listen to, to tell the truth“ that makes the part “to tell the truth” meaningful to this verse, in other words, that she can’t listen to the souls to tell the truth and also meaningful to the next verse, the chorus, where she talks about what loving this person was, that’s HER truth. (This particular thought is very significant of why my analysis of this song tends to be different than the way other people think, so keep that “to tell the truth” part and how the way she sings works for both of these verses in mind)

Loving you was young, and wild, and free

Loving this person was “young”, which means that her relationship started when she was younger (hallo Lauren), “wild”  😏 lol I’ll stop, “free” it made her feel free (it could also mean in my analysis as a refference of how that relantionship made her feel free about herself, being who she truly is, if you know what I mean  🏳️‍🌈). This particular verse could be a reference to the song Heaven of Bryan Adams “Oh thinkin' about all our younger years There was only you and me We were young and wild and free” (which by the way the lyrics of this song screams Camren as well)

Loving you was cool, and hot, and sweet

Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound

A steady place to let down my defenses

Very literal verses, where she’s describing how amazing was the feeling of loving this person, I also love when she says “Loving you was sunshine, safe and sound”, I love the “sunshine” refference (for me, another clear tip that this song is about Lolo, we all know their love for the sun and the moon thing) and “safe and sound” confirming what I said about how this love made her feel free and yet safe whenever she was around this person.  “A steady place to let down my defenses” she didn’t have to try to be someone else, she could be genuinely who she is with this person, she didn’t have to hide her “bleeding”, it was a safe place for her to be who she truly is, to be her true self.

But loving you had consequences

“But” she uses an adversative conjuction to express that even though loving this person was incredible, it had consequences. Let’s get deep in that. Why a relationship where everything was amazing and you had a huge connection with a person, where you could be 100% yourself without questioning, would have consequences? Because as we already concluded it is a secret relationship, talking specifically about our girls situation, having a LGBTQIA+ relationship in this music industry world is very hard. The industry is homophobic and didn’t accept the fact of two girls loving each other in the same group. But what I found very interesting about this chorus is that it seems to me that she’s singing about her first feelings towards this person, when they started having a relationship, how it was so intense that she and her partner wouldn’t even care about those consequences, that they knew it existed, but they were so into each other, so consumed of their love (NBTS describe this feeling perfectly) that it didn’t matter. Camila herself in a interview with Zach Sang said that she loved how in this song it wasn’t showed any regret on it, that if she could, she would still faced the same consequences in order to experience the love she felt for this person.

Hesitation, awkward conversation

Running on low expectation

They’re having communication issues and “running on low expectation”, even with their hopes low, they are trying to expect something good about that situation their facing (I expect, you expect, we expect - I’ll do an analysis of this song as well, but I love how their songs are connected and in my opinion both of them portray the same period of their relationship)

Every siren that I was ignoring

I'm paying for it

Like I already said, when she was with this person the intensity of their love made both of them ignore the consequences of it, they just wanted to be together, they ignored the sirens, but now, she’s paying for it, the consequences got her. I’m a composer myself so I pay a lot of attention in how the grammar is used, when she says  “I'm paying for it” means that even though in the past  “I was ignoring“ she ignored it, she’s still facing the consequences of this love in her present  “I'm paying for it” (cof cof pr) . PS: I also love the way she says “ignoring”,I don’t know if any of you already realized that, but the right pronunciation would be ig-nohrIN she pronunces ig-nohrEN, funny how there is a green eyes girl who have a name that the pronunciation ends with EN, of course this could be a coincidence, but whenever I hear this part I can’t stop thinking of Lauren’s name lmao.

Then she repeats the same chorus, emphasizing how amazing was feeling this love but again, it had consequences

No, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Said, no, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Hey, yeah, no, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, mm

I love how subtle Camila is with this bridge part and that’s exactly where my analysis for this song starts to get different than what most people see. She starts the bridge with a “No, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh” “ Said, no, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh “ “ Hey, yeah, no, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh “ she repeats the word “no” in this verses 3 times. You can come to me and say “she’s using this “no” just to ensure musicality” well, that’s not true. She could just say “ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh”, that “no” is there for a reason. For me, it looks like she’s trying to deny the consequences, she don’t want to face them, she knows how much that love means to her, she doesn’t want to pretend that it was nothing. But the truth is that: she has to. That’s the consequences of being with someone you’re not allowed to be with. That’s the consequences of a forbidden love.

Loving you was dumb, dark, and cheap

She tried to deny it, but now she’s facing the consequences. That’s when my opinion, like I said, it’s different than what most people think about this song, I deeply don’t think, that here, she’s talking about what loving this person made her feel in a way of what THAT PERSON caused her, she’s talking about the consequences, what the management made her feel about loving this person. This statement that it was “dumb, dark and cheap”, it’s NOT her truth, her truth is that it “was young, and wild and free”, remember? I always saw this song from a perspective of this last chorus being about the vision that management made of them or/and what they had to face it because of their love. What confirmed that for me was Camila’s performance in the AMA’s around 2:21, the orchestral conductor appears, and he appears in the exact same time that she starts to sing the bridge part and if you look closely, the way she’s moving her hands looks like she’s being controlled and led by him. For me, the orchestral conductor represents the management. 

Loving you will still take shots at me 

Again, she reaffirms that because of the love she have for this person she has to still deal nowadays with those consequences, it  “still take shots“ at her. She still have to hide it, she still have to stop the bleeding, she still can’t listen to the souls and share her truth.

Found loving you was sunshine, but then it poured

And I lost so much more than my senses

'Cause loving you had consequences

Yeah, loving you

She realized that even tho their love “was sunshine” because of the consequences “it poured” and that she lost “so much more” than her “senses“, she lost her freedom of being who she truly is, she isn’t able to talk about her truth nor about her love for this person, cause loving her had consequences.

Also, let’s not forget that before Camila starts to sing Consequences in her tour shows, she sings a part of Elvis Presley’s song “Can’t Help Falling in Love”. She sings:  

Wise men say only fools rush in

But I can't help falling in love with you

Shall I stay?

Would it be a sin

If I can't help falling in love with you?

She can’t not fall in love with this person, even if it’s “forbidden”, even if it’s a “sin”.

So, my final conclusion about this song as a whole is that: Camila is telling us her story about this relationship. She starts singing about the consequences of what this “forbidden love” has caused in her life and also in her partner’s life, how their relationship was affected by this pressure that they had from outside of people considering their love as wrong thing, as “dumb, dark and cheap”. In the chorus she remembers what it was to love this person without thinking about what loving one another will cause, they didn’t care about the consequences back then, they ignored the siren and now they’re facing the consequences in the present. But like she already established: she doesn’t regret, her love for this person is worthy all the risk of having to face these hard consequences. Their love is worthy. 

[deeisace]

Strange dreams

Series of them, warning for uh for unreality, stabbing, and zombies, and bugs (and cucumber ice cream?)

First, in pub singsong car home with people and home is big Elizabethan hall with a decapitated guy in the uhhh lobby and one guy is still like lalala everything is lovely and another guy is like here's a knife to stick in your leg it'll wake you up from this trap and keep zombies?? away cs this isn't heaven or anywhere like that

Felt all floaty and fine but seeing dead guy made me realise oh this is a dream and knife in leg stopped me succumbing and woke me up

Went to electronic shop with knife guy and scared girl (same pub singsong car crash there was a car crash, i’m not sure how alive we are - she did not have a knife, and kept wandering off, I had to keep an eye on her) find out where we are

Australia????

Shop assistant is like I can only see one person here and they have a knife in their leg (in my left knee, tho everything worked when i wasn’t looking at it and sometimes i had to twist it to wake myself up again) talking to the air this is bad™ and I'm like nah we're surrounded by uhhhh demons you have to do what we say and knife guy lifted them off the ground as proof he was there shop assistant O_O help. Okay what dyou want - a GPS thing we shouldn't even be in this hemisphere

And then dream changed to one where I was uhhh trying on lingerie in a combination lingerie/bed shop and accidentally made eyes at a girl while uhhh while in bed in a sexy bra unthinkingly doing a pose maybe??? Realised and said to another customer oh no what did I just do and she's like hey I think she liked you and I'm like noooo this is too embarrassing I didn't mean that

Then I was in a caravan with mum, not her boat, and someone was skulking around outside so I was like loud voice hey! The fuck you want! and it turned out that they had a carrier bag full of photos to give us, and then my basically an aunt C like came round the corner like hello!! hugs

And then I was home, woken up and there was a talking donkey trying to get in through my bathroom window and I had to beat him away with a broom and shouting but every time I tried to close the window then he'd have a hand a hoof in the way

And then (last one) I was late to work I got there on time but I had to go out again down the high street cs we were going away?? it was the annoying cover guy but he was fine for once and I went and got sliced tomatoes done up with oil and pepper, and cucumber ice cream to go with - and walking back to work there was filming on the street and the annoying cover guy and someone else sweeping soapy water out the shop/off the street with huge brooms like some kinda 1920s double act, and I was only 15 minutes late and I went upstairs to clock in and woke up

Okay wait this is the last one (fell asleep again) - earwigs! Earwigs falling from the ceiling into my drink!!

This one is sorta based in truth - what actually happens like every summer (or at least this and last, and maybe the one before I can't remember - wait then was horrible little grub things with legs) is tiny black and yellow ladybird looking things. Everywhere. Not loads of them - oh here's one on my pillow, gross

The photos shit but that's my thumb and they are black and yellow kind of checkerboard-y with wings

Tbh I just kill them whenever I find them, but they have fallen from the ceiling before

But the dream was giant earwigs (at my dad’s house, I collected them and went downstairs to show him and my stepmum and she screamed), and that might be cs I found an earwig in the nasturtiums yesterday (how? How? That window hasn't been open, how'd the fucker get in?)

Very gross all round, bleh

I would like a different waking-up dream please