#and revise basically the entire semester at least in two courses

[yoon-kooks]

The Devil Writes Romance | myg

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

Genre: fluff, angst, college!AU, fuckboy!AU, fanficwriter!Yoongi

Summary: When you’re assigned to work with Min Yoongi on a final project for your Writing Fiction course, you stumble upon the fuck boy’s secret identity as a sappy fanfic writer. With the heart and soul of an aspiring editor, you’re somehow convinced by the boy himself to help make his fictional romance more realistic and heartfelt. Before you know it, you’ve made a not-so-innocent pinky promise with the devil.

Word Count: 3.2k

Warnings: mentions of sex :-)

A/N: this is basically a pilot that sets up a lot of plot for a potential series so lmk if you like the idea and would continue reading it as a series! also special shoutout to @chewymoustachio​ for the love & support 💖

As spring semester comes to a close, your only goal is to make it through finals week unscathed. Like many of your fellow English majors, most of your finals are extensive papers rather than traditional exams. Normally this would not stress you out, but your Writing Fiction course has thrown a curveball your way: half of your grade is dependent on your partner, Min Yoongi.

Personally, you’ve never been a fan of partner or group projects because you always somehow end up with incompetent teammates who either do a half-assed job or ghost you until the day before it’s due. Either way, you’ve learned and become accustomed to relying only on yourself.

However, as your Writing Fiction class has taught you, a writer’s world is not built upon independence. Rather, it’s built upon the opposite. Writers depend on others for support, feedback, and revision. That’s where your final project comes on.

For your final project, everyone in your class signed up for the role of either a writer or editor, and you’ve been randomly paired up with someone who chose the opposite. It’s no secret to anyone that you dream of becoming an editor in the industry. You love the idea of reviewing other writers’ works and providing them with as much feedback and constructive criticism as possible. Naturally, you signed up to be an editor.

As fate would have it, you find yourself paired with the boy who’s pretty much slept with the entire class, including the TA, and allegedly the professor. The only person left unchecked on his list is you. Somehow, you’ve heard more gossip about his sex life than his skills as a writer, which is why you believe you’re fucked for this final.

“Hey, Partner,” Yoongi catches up with you in the hall after class. His signature cedarwood cologne is too heavy to ignore as he strides beside you. “Are you free tonight?”

“To brainstorm some story ideas?” You tilt your head and add an innocent tone to mask the skepticism. Truthfully, you know what he really wants. It’s not your first rodeo.

“I actually already have a story in mind,” he says. “But I was thinking you and I could-”

“What’s the story about?” Because you’d much rather hear about that than one of Yoongi’s many excuses to get in your pants.

“You’ll just have to wait and see,” he shrugs as the two of you walk out of the building and into the beaming afternoon sun. You lift an arm to block the light out of your face, only to realize the boy’s shadow blocks it for you. Apparently, there are perks to walking with a buddy after class. “I’ll send you the draft tonight.”

“The professor literally just assigned the project and it’s not due for another week,” you raise an eyebrow. Weird, you’ve never seen a college kid so proactive and eager to get a head start on their final project. Something tells you the boy is just spouting bullshit and telling you what you want to hear. “You don’t have to rush and write all ten thousand words in a single night…”

“Well I don’t have any other plans tonight,” he says. “Unless you want to-”

“Nice try, Yoongi.” You start walking further ahead of the boy. You’re forced to squint as to not be blinded by the sun. “I guess you can have fun writing your story, then.”

“You really know how to play hard to get, Y/N…” Yoongi whines in that raspy voice of his, eliciting the tiniest smirk on your face. You might not approve of his fuck boy tendencies, but you’re also not opposed to teasing him a bit.

“If you really want to impress me, keep your word and send the draft tonight.” You spin around and wave farewell as you battle the sun. “Your editor will be waiting.”

As soon as you arrive home, you realize Yoongi isn’t the only one without any Friday night plans. With nothing to do, a large part of you hopes your partner keeps his promise so you can at least try to be productive over the weekend. But ten thousand words is a lot to write in one night. It’s more than likely that he won’t be able to pull it off.

In an attempt to wind down, you scroll through the blog feeds of your favorite writers. Many of them, such as @suga-fix and @jk-seagull, are college students like you, so you can appreciate all the time and effort they put into their craft on top of their school work. While the fan in you loves to shower them with sweet and supportive messages, the editor in you hopes to one day be able to also provide feedback on a professional level.

At the very top of your feed is a short post from @suga-fix, a romance fanfic writer whom you recently found while scouring the #jiminscenarios tag for something free of smut.

“Does anyone else struggle to ask their crush out or is it just me? Asking for a friend.”

You giggle at the innocent question. In addition to writing the sappiest Jimin fanfics, Suga is known to post snippets of his own nonexistent love life on his blog. From what you understand, he’s a boy who’s never experienced true love firsthand. Recently, however, he’s been gushing over his pretty classmate. You’re waiting for the day when he builds up enough courage and finally lands a date.

Until then, you’re satisfied with reading his ongoing fictional love story featuring the popular idol, Park Jimin, as a struggling romance novelist who finds inspiration in a skeptical wedding photographer. You absolutely adore the story, the characters, and the underlying narrative, but the editor in you can point out an area for improvement: his romance game. 

You notice the two main characters lack a certain level of chemistry to get the readers quaking and itching for more. Most of the time, the intimate scenes end with poor Jimin getting friendzoned, which certainly has its charm and humor. But truthfully, you expect a little more love from a romance fic.

You suspect that, to some extent, this is intentional as the characters are the type to dance around intimacy and have pessimistic views on romance overall. However, you also wouldn’t be surprised if Suga’s own personal inexperience with romantic scenarios is what holds him back the most.

After catching up on your socials, eating dinner, and hopping out of the shower, you sit in the darkness of your room and check one more thing before calling it a night. No email, no text, no draft from your partner. Not that you were actually expecting anything, but it would’ve been nice for the fuck boy to prove you wrong.

To be fair, you know how long and painful ten thousand words can be. If Yoongi is in fact sprinting through those ten thousand words and gets them to you by the time you wake up, you’ll consider him a man of his word.

[4:56AM] Yoongi💋 “I emailed you the thing”

[7:24AM] Y/N “Ooh, I’ll take a look 👁👁”

[7:25AM] Y/N “Btw I don’t appreciate you adding an emoji to your contact info on my phone”

After changing Yoongi’s contact name to something more appropriate, you go into your email and find the story draft that the boy had sent at exactly 4:55AM. The word count on the document says 10,382. Not too shabby, Min Yoongi.

You grab your morning caffeine and crack open your laptop to read your partner’s story on the big screen. Right away, you notice the document is titled “Untitled1” which is never a great sign, but you’re willing to forgive him if its content is stellar.

The first thing that puts a smile on your face is the main character, Jimothy. His name reminds you of your favorite idol, Jimin, with a playful touch. He’s the romance novelist who attends his friend’s wedding where he has a chance encounter with a pretty wedding photographer-

Wait. You’re pretty sure you’ve heard this story before. In fact, you know exactly where it came from. You pull up Suga’s Jimin fic and put it side-by-side against Yoongi’s version. While it’s not exactly a copy-and-paste situation, the romance novelist x wedding photographer premise is too similar for it to be a mere coincidence.

At first glance, you find it funny that Yoongi took the time to reword everything to not be caught by the plagiarism police. If you didn’t know any better, you’d assume he did a quick search of Jimin fanfiction and picked one that was moderately popular but not viral enough for anyone to notice. Jimin fanfic just so happens to be your guilty pleasure, so there’s absolutely no way you’d let a plagiarist slip one past you.

But upon further review, after digesting the entirety of the fic, you find that Yoongi’s flow and choice of words are eerily similar to Suga’s style without recycling a single line. Likewise, you notice the same lack of chemistry in both versions of the story. You suppose this can only mean one thing, and you need to confront him about it in person. Because the last thing you want is for him to ghost you like everyone else you’ve ever worked with.

[8:42AM] Y/N “I just finished looking it over”

[8:43AM] Y/N “Wanna get coffee & discuss? ☕️📖”

[8:45AM] Yoongi🐍 “Oh? I thought you weren’t interested in a date with me 🥺”

[8:46AM] Y/N “Let’s meet in about an hour at the coffeehouse on campus?”

[8:46AM] Yoongi🐍 “See ya there, my editor”

As you stir the oat milk into your second dose of caffeine for the morning, you wonder how you can bring up your suspicions in an appropriate and professional way. Should you confront him about it immediately, gently coax him in that direction, or take a more passive approach to see if he’ll mention it on his own? Because if you’re going to be this boy’s editor, you want to do it right.

“Thoughts?” Yoongi enters the chat with slightly damp hair and an iced Americano in hand. Your only thought in that moment is about how fucking good he smells, even in the presence of the rich aromas of your favorite roasted coffee beans. But you’ll leave those thoughts to yourself.

“My first thought was that you sent me a document titled Untitled1,” you say.

“I have a working title,” he assures you. “But I’m curious to hear what clever titles my editor has come up with after reading through the whole thing.”

“Pink Cheek Syndrome sounds appropriate.” Because that’s the title of Suga’s original fic. It’s also the term coined by Jimothy to describe couples who aren’t as in love as they’d like to believe. It’s a facade to fool everyone, including themselves.

“Great minds think alike after all.” Yoongi leans in to give you a high-five, but you just throw a balled up napkin at his palm. Confess. Just confess already.

“Can I ask what inspired the concept?” You bite your lip. “You don’t strike me as the romantic type.”

“Don’t you ever feel like people get into relationships just for the sake of being in a relationship?”

“Yeah.” All the time, in fact.

“It’s pretty shallow if you ask me,” he says with a nonchalant chuckle, as if he’s not the shallowest person on campus when it comes to established relationships. “PCS is just a commentary on people like that vs people like you and me.”

You and him? You’re not sure you have anything in common with someone who breaks hearts and sleeps around so casually.

“Sounds like something a fanfic writer would come up with.” Because it is.

“Sounds like something a fanfic reader would say,” he throws back at you.

“In fact, there’s a Jimin fanfic I read once called Pink Cheek Syndrome,” you say. The dose of coffee moving up Yoongi’s straw suddenly freezes. “You’re the original writer, right?”

He swallows hard and raises an eyebrow. “What makes you say that?”

“The writing style matches even though you didn’t copy and paste,” you scroll back through Yoongi’s version for reference. “And besides, scrambling to write ten thousand words in one night is typical fanfic writer behavior. A true plagiarist doesn’t know what it means to put those hours in.”

“Nothing gets past your sharp eyes, huh, Y/N…” Yoongi sighs, failing to hide behind his Americano. “I’m equally impressed as I am scared.”

“Wait, so you’re really Suga?” Your eyes widen. Suddenly you’re overcome by a wave of emotions. Excited, nervous, star-struck. But most of all? Confused. “How?”

“Just don’t tell anyone.” He picks up his phone and starts typing away at something.

“I won’t,” you say, also pulling out your phone to check up on the @suga-fix blog. Sure enough, there’s a stream of several new posts from a few seconds ago.

“fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckFUCK”

“I feel so exposed 😔”

“Quick, everyone act like this isn’t a fanfic blog.”

“We can pretend to be like a porn blog or smth”

“I can read everything you’re posting, you know.” You show your blog feed to Yoongi, who’s still busy keysmashing. When he finally glances up from his screen to yours, the look on his face is both flattered and distressed.

“You follow me, too?” The boy takes a long sip of his Americano, shifting his beady little eyes and plotting his next move. “What’s your URL?”

“You’re totally going to block me,” you frown. “I already told you, I’m not going to tell anyone…”

As you continue to scroll through Yoongi’s blog, you notice his post is gone from the day before. Perhaps that’s what the boy is desperately trying to hide.

“By the way, is it true that Min Yoongi, resident fuck boy, has a crush on someone?” You get excited because that’s not something you hear everyday. In regards to Yoongi, it’s always been sex, sex, and more sex. He’s notorious around campus for having one-night stands and breaking hearts the morning after. You’d never imagine a boy like him having an innocent crush on anyone.

“Where’d you hear that?” The boy across from you gradually sinks deeper and deeper into his seat every time you open your mouth to expose him further.

“You made a post yesterday about not being able to talk to your crush properly,” you giggle. “It was kind of cute.”

“I was talking about my friend.”

“You can’t fool me, Yoongi. I’m not that oblivious.” You take a sassy sip of your coffee and lean forward. “So who’s your crush? Is it someone in our class?”

“Don’t worry about it, Y/N,” he shoos you away and slides a hard copy of his draft in your direction. “Let’s not get distracted from why we’re really here.”

“Hold it, I’m not just being nosy for the gossip, you know,” you say. “From an editor’s perspective, I think the romance in your story could benefit from you interacting more with your crush.”

For a moment, Yoongi just gives you a look. You can see the wheels spinning in his head. “Well, that person doesn’t seem very interested in me, so…”

“Unrequited love?” you gasp. The plot thickens.

“Yeah,” he chuckles at your enthusiasm. “But you did give me an idea just now.”

You examine his handsome face for a hint of what’s to come. His signature Fuck Boy Smirk tells you he’s up to no good again. “I’m listening.”

“You’re my editor, right?” he asks. You nod. “And your main critique is that I should up my romance game, right?”

You nod again.

“What if you help me make the romance scenes more believable and realistic?” The boy watches as you blink your wide eyes, stunned at his suggestion. You know he doesn’t just mean that from an editorial standpoint. Surely there’s an ulterior motive here. “And before you jump to any conclusions, no, this does not include sex.”

Oh.

You’re reminded that Yoongi doesn’t write smut, despite how much of a fuck boy he is in real life. Because you’re sure he has the capability and personal experience to write some steamy and wild sex scenes. And yet, he chooses to focus on hardcore romance instead, something he himself is much less familiar with. It’s mind-blowing to think that a boy as experienced in bed as Yoongi could be so inexperienced elsewhere.

Why does he write the opposite of how he lives?

“I don’t think that’s how editors work,” you finally respond to Yoongi’s proposal, flipping through his draft and writing in the margins. You have to admit, the boy has a gift. His stories would no doubt skyrocket in popularity if the lovey-dovey scenes could draw out true, raw emotions as though you were there living in those moments. As a reader, you want him to pull at your heartstrings, smash your heart into a million pieces, and slowly put it back together. All of that can be achieved if the writer gets some hands-on experience in the love department. “But I get what you’re saying.”

“So is that a yes or a no?” He sips down the rest of his Americano as you continue to think your decision through.

Given what you know about Yoongi’s track record as a fuck boy, you’re hesitant. But at the same time, the ambitious editor in you knows what you want.

“It’s a yes,” you sigh. “But only if you promise me a few things.”

“Go on.”

“One, you’ll come to me if you’re struggling and need suggestions, advice, or someone to talk to.”

“Easy. You can be my editor-in-chief.”

“Two, if anyone asks, we aren’t dating.”

“Got it.”

“Three, help me study and prepare for the rest of my finals.”

“We can have study dates.”

“And lastly, please don’t sleep with anyone else while we’re doing this thing. Because that would be awkward.”

“Oh? I didn’t realize you were the possessive type, Y/N,” he smirks.

“Not trying to be That Controlling Bitch who forbids you from sleeping around, but I think it would defeat the purpose of what we’re trying to accomplish.”

“But what if this goes on for a while?” Yoongi strokes his imaginary Santa beard. “You expect me to practice abstinence forever?”

“It won’t go on forever, Yoongi,” you giggle at the boy’s silly remark. “Because eventually, you’ll find someone who can bring out those romantic feelings better than our faux intimacy ever will.”

“But you’ll still be my editor-in-chief?”

“If everything works out, then I don’t see why not.” You want to be optimistic about a long-term deal, but you can’t seem to rid yourself of the doubt stuck in the back of your mind. Because humans, not just fuck boys like Yoongi, seem to have a hard time keeping their promises. “I only ask that you don’t break my trust.”

Before responding, the boy meets his eyes with yours. You suppose tender eye contact is a skill he acquired from his flirty lifestyle. You, on the other hand, blink away. Eye contact longer than a glance has always made you feel vulnerable.

“I won’t, Y/N,” he says, coating his raspy voice with a layer of honey. It’s almost as intoxicating as his cedarwood cologne, but that’s another thought you’ll keep to yourself.

You watch as he slides his pinky into view, over the draft and coffees to make it official. After cracking a smile at his childish gesture, you wrap your pinky around his, thus marking the beginning of your deal with the devil.

[thepsychicclam]

Could you talk a little about what being a professor/getting your PhD has been like? Do you have to constantly do research and publish, is it hard to find jobs, do they pay enough to relieve the doctoral debt? I know you’ve moved at least once and I wasn’t sure if it was to follow a job, or if it was for personal reasons and then, was finding a new job hard? Did you start teaching while getting your PhD? I’m just fascinated by it and you seem like the best to ask!

Yes! I can share my experience. Everyone’s experience is different, and mine is unique for a few reasons I’ll discuss below. It may also vary from field to field. My PhD is in literature/English, and from what I’ve gathered, your concentration can influence a lot of stuff, too. So, under the cut, I’ll try to share my experience as much as I can! This is VERY LONG, so be warned, nonny! :D

Before I decided to get a PhD, I got a MAT - a master’s in secondary education with a focus on English literature. My BA is in creative writing/english lit. I taught high school for three years, and for a lot of reasons said FUCK THIS NOISE and quit. I lived with my parents and they told me they’d help support me. I ended up with a college teaching job (you can teach adjunct in the states with a masters) and they told me to get a PhD if I wanted to do it full time some day. I love teaching, and I’m good at it. I especially love teaching literature. So, I decided to go get my PhD.

Choosing my specialization was kinda interesting bc I decided to go for medieval literature, which I hadn’t really studied up until that point. I had always done Victorian and Shakespeare/Renaissance, with a bit of dabbling into Native American and postcolonial literature. But I taught Dante’s Inferno to my seniors my last yr at HS and fell in LOVE. So, I thought, “Hey, there aren’t a lot of medievalists. Everyone gets a PhD in Shakespeare/Victorian lit, so I’ll do that. Maybe it’ll make me more marketable.” I have always loved medieval lit, so I figured lets go for it.

My original plan was to do something with romances, so late medieval stuff. I ended up with two professors in the dept, one who focused on Anglo-Saxon/Old English and one who focused on Chaucer/later medieval. I took multiple classes in both, and my second or third semester, I took intro to Old English. I fell in LOVE WITH IT. It was a linguistics course where we learned the Old English language (which is completely different than modern or even middle english) and translated. I was GOOD at it and took to it unlike anyone else in the class. It just made sense. I think probably bc I had a background in Latin and German (I was a German studies minor in undergrad until I realized I couldn’t speak German to save my life :P) and I took like 3 or 4 yrs of Latin in hs. Anyway, I was hooked and switched to Old English. I took a lot of postcolonial literature courses, like Indian lit, lit of SE Asian, and Native American lit courses, and through this I met another professor who I adored. I ended up working with her to do my minor/secondary specialization, which is literature of the indigenous peoples of America (Native American, Chicano lit, etc - mostly Native American). I ALMOST wrote my dissertation with her bc I loved her so much and I love Native American literature so much. However, as a white woman, I didn’t feel that I would make a good postcolonial/Native American scholar, so I stuck with Anglo-Saxon lit.

I used my class papers to start working on my dissertation ideas. I got obsessed with monstrosity and the narrow definition in AS lit, and connected that to ideas of reason, which I also became obsessed with, and ended up writing all my papers about some type of monstrous transformation and how it connects to the reason of the punished. Thus, my dissertation topic was born, which currently has the working title of Transformative Bodies and their Punishments as Social Control in Anglo-Saxon Literature. It’s a terrible title, but right now, at least it states the overall topic lol

My comps, which are the comprehensive exams you have to take, took me a year to read for. Most people take one semester, I took 2. I took mine in the spring and just read for two semesters. Now, to put it into perspective, the English dept standard was 40 primary texts and 20 secondary texts, so 60 texts. Mine was WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY over that. I ended up with over 16,000 pgs of texts to read. Hint: I DID NOT READ THEM ALL. And remember, half of mine were in Middle English, so they took 3 times as long to read, and half were translated OE texts. But I read a lot, read the secondary stuff, and took my comps. Comps were supposed to be 2.5 hrs. The director of graduate studies handed me my comps and said, “You’re the medieval one, right?” And I was like, “...yes...” and he looked at me and said, “You get 4 hrs.” THAT’S HOW FUCKING LONG MY ADVISOR MADE MY COMPS. I HAD TO GET EXTRA TIME. So, 4 hrs I did nothing but type. There were questions on there that were not part of my 16k words, but I answered everything. I wrote 9 fucking thousand words in 4 hrs. I was PUMPED. Then, he gave me just a PASS not PASS PLUS. I’m a straight A student, valedictorian, graduated cum laude and magna cum laude, mortar board, scholarships, etcetc. I WAS PISSED :|||| I MEAN I HAD 4 HRS AND WRITE 9K ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?? It didn’t matter bc I still passed, but it was a pride thing lol

Okay, so that August I moved to Boston. My diss director was PISSED. I was ABD (all but dissertation, ie I had passed my comps), so I was going to work on my dissertation remotely. Many ppl do this. Well, he basically looked at me and said, “Yeah most ppl don’t finish who do this.” I cried for like 2 weeks. Then I got pissed and told myself I WILL FUCKING FINISH THIS IF IT KILLS ME. I regretted not doing the Native American diss with the professor I loved. My dissertation director is a dick. Hands down. I would be finished if I had a better director. I have had no support. Now, I did move to Boston, I procrastinated and took my time and had a lot of anxiety, but he didn’t help me at all. He made it worse. If you’ve followed me for awhile, you know I struggle with depression and anxiety, and at times it’s basically debilitating. So, it increased tenfold with the dissertation process. It took me a year to get my proposal submitted, finalized, and approved. 

I started working on my dissertation, which thankfully I had drafts of chapters from my class papers. As of right now, I have drafted 4 full chapters of average 40 pgs each and am revising. My director takes forever to get back from me, and my comments give me MAJOR anxiety. Part of the dissertation process is being told “yeah this needs work.” It’s like, hey, your ideas are great! You have a good point! But here are 100 ways you suck. Or that’s what it feels like. So, it became a major source of crippling anxiety for me. When I was in therapy, it was like all I talked about. I have to spend a week or two just pumping myself to check my fucking email. I have been trying to make an inface mtg with my advisor for a freaking yr. He blew me off to go to the bar with his friends at a conference we attended last yr (I only know this for a fact bc I SAW HIM AT THE BAR WITH THEM when he texted me and said he had “fallen asleep.”) So, needless to say, that has been a huge struggle and conflict. However, I don’t think that’s normal. lol I’m just cursed.

Right now, I’m trying to learn how to push myself as an academic writer and researcher to the next level. Something I need him to teach me, but still trying to meet face to face! I’ve gotten to the point in my drafts that I need to improve the arguments and research in a few places, but I’m not sure how to break through my wall. I need guidance, you know? Bc I don’t live around the campus, I’m doing this alone. I don’t have a writers group or any friends in the program. I’m pretty alone and isolated, which sucks. It’s also not the norm either, I don’t think. So, I have to push myself and keep myself going and write in a vacuum. I’m the only medievalist in the Eng dept getting a PhD, so there’s not even someone else writing their dissertation in Anglo-Saxon lit or even Middle English. The medieval dept is small.

So, that is my PhD schooling experience. Let’s talk about work and loans. I worked at a different college as an adjunct while doing my classes. I did not do a graduate research or teaching assistant job at the university, which means I paid for my schooling out of pocket/loans. I had someone tell me once, “If you’re paying for your own PhD, you shouldn’t be getting one. If you’re not being paid to get it, you’re not worth anything.” Pretty much, I feel like I was told the entire way I was doing everything wrong. I couldn’t get a GRA/GTA while teaching at the other school. I was an adjunct with a 3 class load, so I made decent, though not much. I lived at home w my folks, so I was okay with money. I was extremely lucky bc of that bc most ppl live on their own and have to work multiple jobs. When I moved to Boston, that’s when I got the 239847239 jobs. (also why I used to write a lot of fic and now I don’t write as much lol real life, man). When I moved to Boston, I taught adjunct, 3 classes. I also did freelance writing and worked at a farm, mainly bc rent was$2000/mth and I didn’t get paid during the summer. When I moved to SC, I also ended up with a 3 class adjunct job, but continued with the freelance writing. I have always been incredibly lucky with getting jobs. I think it’s bc I have a lot of teaching experience (this is my 10th yr teaching) and I have a background in English literature instead of education. I also wasn’t picky where I taught. I wasn’t teaching at Harvard, Boston College, or even something like the University of South Carolina. I taught at a small state school to start with, a community college in Boston, and now another small state school. But all experience is good experience. One thing that will make you marketable is your teaching experience. Everyone I’ve every talked to who hired me was interested in my teaching experience. 

For my career, right now I do a lot of conferences. I am doing 5 this semester, and I have done a ton of them. Graduate conferences, medieval conferences, lit conferences, pedagogy conferences, even library conferences. I give presentations/papers at each of them, bc I don’t see the point of going to a conference if you aren’t going to give a paper. I haven’t done any publishing yet. I have a few ideas for articles, but I’m terrified. It’s very hard to get published, so I haven’t tried yet :/ it is an expectation of all professors/phds to get published. At my current job, where I just got hired full time as an Visiting Assistant Professor, if I get a tenure track position, I have to have at least 1 publication within 5 years. That is a peer reviewed journal article or book. Getting published in English is SO MUCH HARDER than the sciences. I have a friend who works in Atlanta as a research assistant/lab technician/scientist (I’m not sure the title tbh) and she has like 3 publications bc she helped with these studies that they publish online that get published within like a month. My sister has a chapter in an art history essay collection, and it took 2 years to get published!! Academic publishing is the WORST. I’m hoping at least one dissertation chapter gets accepted as an article. I also did a project in my 102 class last semester that I have given multiple conference presentations and teaching workshops about, and I’m starting to work on turning it into an article. I want to be a teaching professor, not a research professor, so I’m trying to focus on the teaching aspect of my career. I just got a Brit Lit class for next semester instead of a sea of composition, so I’m trying to come up with a unique topical angle that I can use on my CV to show my teaching skills. So, part of my job is trying to find ways to increase my CV. Like, I run a panel at a regional literature conference (I kinda lucked into it bc my mentor used to run it, and now I do lol), so that looks good on my CV, too. So, it’s not constant publishing, but you are expected to do SOMETHING, conferences, publication, things like that.

Is it hard to find jobs? I’d say yes. Like I said, I have been incredibly lucky to always have a job. My dissertation director told me last yr after I got my job in SC, “Well, I guess you’re doing something right. I mean, you always seem to find a job.” (thanks asshole for that BACKHANDED COMPLIMENT) I am not picky. Experience is experience, and you’re not going to find your dream job immediately. That sense of entitlement limits you and keeps you from finding a job to start. Right now, I teach 5 fucking composition 101 classes. I was bitching to my sister today about how I was teaching fucking TOPIC SENTENCES and my students don’t get it!!! It sucks!! But, it pays a full time salary, and it gives me experience. Do I want to teach how to write a FUCKING TOPIC SENTENCE?? NO!! I can translate Old English and have studied medieval and early British literature for almost a decade. THAT’S WHAT I WANT TO FOCUS ON. But, I’m not an entitled asshole and realize I have to work my way up. When I finish my PhD, will get the perfect medieval/early British job? NO. I hope to get a job as an early British person somewhere (not my current school, who has no need for a medievalist really), but I know it will take one to two jobs before my dream job. Everyone I know has done 1-3 jobs before their perfect tenure job. Of course, there are always people who have the magic CV or whatever who will get that perfect job right out of grad school. I have no delusions. That’s not gonna be me. I’m an okay researcher and scholar and a damn good teacher. The first part means more than the last part for colleges. I just hope to eventually find somewhere I can teach Medieval lit to undergrads, and maybe do a course on monsters in pop culture.

Money wise, professors make okay but not mega bucks. I make pretty good for my area. But, I grew up poor, so having a full time job is like WHOO. I’ve learned how to live a great life on a lower salary. If money is what you want, this is not the career for you unless you’re teaching business or accounting at an MBA program. However, I go to work at 10 am, I leave some days at 1 and others at 3, I get from May-August and all of December off, and I make a full time yearly salary. So...I chose my profession for the time off. lol That’s exactly why I became a teacher XD I’m in a lot of student debt, but I worked out a payment plan with the student loan ppl and pay my loans every month. I’ll be dead before they’re paid off, but oh well :P 

What other questions did you ask...yes, I worked the entire time teaching while getting my degree. At one point I was working 5 jobs lol but not while taking class, during comps/dissertation stuff. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask! Like I said, I have a unique circumstance, with a dick dissertation advisor, moving between 3 states and teaching at 3 different places, though I finally have landed a full time college teaching position lol When I finish my dissertation, I will be very happy with my career path. Right now, with it looming over  my head and making me feel like the fucking biggest idiot and stupidest person on the planet, I regret my life decisions XD But really, I don’t bc, you know, I work like 20 hrs a week XDDDDDD

[nickgerlich]

Old School, New School

It’s the last day of the Spring 2020 semester, and for my students, this is the last blog they’ll have to read. It also means I get a little vacation before Summer term begins in June. My brain is ready for a rest, after nearly 100 blogs this semester, not to mention the fact that the focal point of each one since mid-March has been the pandemic. I can only imagine how happy my students are to be relieved of attending to my missives.

But as we end this term, there is one big question facing each and every one of us, from the highest administrators to faculty and the students we teach: What are things going to be like next August?

If only we knew the answer to that, because like so many things I have presented as conundrums to my students, it all depends. I have read a few articles from national publications offering their predictions, and they range from stern admonitions, from “we must return to campus,” to “it’s going to be very very different, if at all.”

Basically, it is too early, and with a handful of states starting to reopen this week, we are basically testing the waters to see if it is safe to go back outside. This much we know, though: Universities are all very nervous about enrollments and revenues, especially as state governments continue to fund less and less. Without students, we have nothing. Dormitories and cafeterias are also major contributors to those revenues. We need students not only enrolling in courses, but also living on-campus.

Campuses large and small, public and private, will be trying to carve a path through uncharted territory in the months ahead, and with only a butter knife as machete. It’s going to be tough, and about the only thing that is certain is that we won’t be going back exactly to the way we left things in March.

I do not speak on behalf of my university nor my academic unit, and for that matter, any other entity. My thoughts on the future of post-pandemic higher education are strictly my view, and should be construed as nothing more than the misgivings of an old prof who has spent his life in the trenches surrounding the ivory towers of academe.

I sincerely doubt we will have anything less than hybrid course delivery in the fall, meaning that all regularly-scheduled campus courses will have at least 50% of their content posted online. Students may come to campus once per week for a session, but will do the rest of their work online. The old T-TH or M-W-F rhythm will be broken. And as for courses already scheduled to be online, nothing will change there. The only uncertainty is how many courses will have to become 100% online if matters are as bad then as they have been of late.

Class times will have to be arranged such that human interactions are minimized. It goes without saying that seating will have to be drastically adjusted, which then implies smaller cohorts within each class. Group projects will either become a thing of the past, or be forced online. Clubs, sororities, and so forth will also be curtailed at minimum, or eliminated entirely.

Plan on regular and frequent health checks for fever and other symptoms, as well as contact tracing. As much as managing students on-campus is like herding cats, efforts will have to be made to be able to backtrack everything once someone tests positive.

Office hours will have to be revised. We are already proving that we can do them electronically. And for faculty or students with compromised health, their presence on campus at all will have to be given consideration.

Student and faculty travel will not exist. That conference you always went to in Las Vegas every October when the weather is nice? Forget about it. All of those activities will exist only in the virtual world. And those student competitions like Enactus? They will either be online or not at all.

Collegiate sports, theatre, band, and other ensemble activities will also face rough going. Only those sports that allow for socially-distanced individual participation, like golf, can be allowed. And never mind any fans or patrons of the arts.

Dorm life will be different. Shared toilet and bathing areas will not work, and any semblance of old toward the communal nature of dorm living will be over, unless people simply want to live dangerously.

The food court and cafeteria will have to be laid out very differently, allowing for safe distances between students and anyone else dining there. This will be difficult, because these venues have traditionally been great social meet-up sites, as intended, but now they must become quiet halls of semi-quarantine.

And what about the hallowed traditions that incoming freshmen enjoy before school starts? At West Texas A&M University, our Buff Branding will have to be re-imagined completely. I recall now with great horror the activities I participated in at Anderson University in 1977. The Freshman Hike had us form two long lines--boys on the left, girls on the right--and we proceeded to walk hand-in-hand through the nearby cemetery, exchanging introductory remarks and pleasantries, only to be interrupted with a loud “Switch!” every two minutes.

“Hey, what’s your major?” “Where you from?” “Do you have a fever?” Wait, skip that last one. We were more concerned about possibly meeting our future spouse, not our premature death. Next, please.

About the only things that won’t have to be distanced more than at present are the parking lots, already partitioned into neat, tidy little slots with just enough room for us to park and still wiggle out. But if universities do not adapt fast, and if students do not return, it’s not going to matter, because suddenly the one thing that everyone complained about will become a moot point.

Let’s hope the distance between the cars stays the same as it always was, and that colleges and universities spend the next four months retooling everything. Their survival depends on it. Heck, my job depends on it. And your education depends on it.

I may be wrong on any or several of these things, and in a perfect world, I would be wrong on every last one of them. But one need not own a crystal ball to see that the future of higher education must change in order for us to exist at all.

To all of my students, I wish you good health and safety, peace, strength, and a clear mind able to discern fact from fiction in what is the biggest crisis to hit any of us. I’ll see you on the other side.

Somewhere.

Dr “Have A Great Summer“ Gerlich

Audio Blog

[autstudy]

STUDY MONDAY #4: Low Energy Study Hacks I'm a student and I'm a spoonie. In spoon theory of disability and chronic illness, a person who is disabled and/or chronically ill has limited energy, or spoons, to get through the day. It can be caused by symptoms, such as pain, fatigue, brain fog, anxiety, and so on, experiences like sensory overload or a panic attack, or even by the requirement to modify your behavior (for autistic people - having to pass as neurotypical). As a result, things that may seem simple, like brushing your teeth, making your bed and cooking a breakfast, can require a lot of energy. Most spoonies can only do a limited amount of things in a day and then we get so exhausted, we have to rest or even wait for the next day to get more spoons. And as you can imagine, studying when your energy sources are limited is quite tricky. This is my list of tips and tricks that might make your spoonie student life a bit easier. 1. Get some sleep I'm putting this first because in my opinion this is the most important advice I can give you. I feel like my energy levels are very dependent on sleep quality. If I am sleep deprived, I barely have any spoons. And I'd guess it is like that for many people. So getting enough sleep should be your number one priority. I know it might sound like "just don't be depressed!". I understand. I have delayed sleep phase disorder and I've had it all my life. Melatonin pills are the only treatment that helps me. For you it might be something simple, like turning down blue light on your smartphone and drinking calming herbal tea, or something more complex, like meds and a strict sleep schedule. Not everyone will find their solution, but many will, so don't give up. You should be getting at least 7-8 hours of sleep every day. Some people need less, some need much more. If you sleep for more than nine hours and still wake up feeling groggy and tired, you might need to adjust your schedule to not wake up during the REM phase (the one where you dream the most). Experiment with alarm clock time, and find a balance that allows you to wake up without sleep inertia. And some generic advice: don't consume caffeine six hours or less before bedtime (yes that includes black/green tea and dark chocolate!), don't nap for longer than half an hour, keep your bedroom cool (almost cold) and clean and don't eat a big meal an hour before bedtime. 2. Prioritize Prioritizing is sometimes the only thing you can do when you have ten important tasks and enough energy to do just five. It starts with being honest about your abilities, as well as responsibilities, and making a realistic plan. In your to do list, the tasks should be arranged from the most important and urgent to the least important and urgent. If something can wait, it can wait - do the assignment that is due in two days. It might also mean "neglecting" things people feel are essential. You don't actually need to make your bed in the morning - it only helps the dust mites to breed. You don't actually need to take a shower every single day - once every 48 hours, or even three times a week, is enough. You won't get malnutrition if you have frozen pizza for dinner once a week - your body can manage. You can wear the same shirt for an entire week - as long as it's clean, it's unlikely people will judge you for it. And so on. I'm not saying "live like a filthy animal", but sometimes you have to cut down the amount of tasks in your daily to do list, and it's better to choose wisely. Sometimes you have to admit you will never be an A only student, and set a goal of learning as much as possible. If you need a certain average grade, calculate how many good grades you actually need and don't worry about others (as long as you pass). For example last semester I had two "I don't give a damn" subjects which I barely passed, and my average was still 4.2 out of 5. Pick easy subjects when possible! It's allowed. Get your As and Bs where you can, but don't forget to rest and take care of yourself. 3. Make compromises You will have some days when you will be able to do very little. You will have many such days. On those days, the most important thing is to do /something/. Just a little bit. Just one small thing you can manage. If you can only read ten pages of a book, do it! Ten less pages to read tomorrow. If you can only write two paragraphs of an essay, do it! Two paragraphs less to write tomorrow. Every tiny thing you will manage is an achievement, and it's progress. Don't fool yourself into thinking "that's not enough, so I won't do it at all". A tiny bit of work is still work. You will also have days when you won't be able to study at all. If you realize that nothing you try is working, it's okay to stop and take a break. Use such "useless" days to take care of yourself. Watch five episodes of your favorite show. Eat junk food. Stay in the shower for an hour. Talk to your friend (or maybe even to your cat). Listen to some good music. Relax! If you know you can't do anything today, you can either be miserable about it or enjoy a tiny holiday. I know what I would choose. 4. Waste some time When you have a lot to do, instead of panicking about it and rushing your work, slow down! Sleep an extra half an hour. Go through your morning routine as usual. Calmly examine your to do list. Prepare your study place. Take a deep breath in. Yes you just "wasted" an hour, or even more. But, you hopefully got into a calm, determined mood, and will be able to deal with stress and do your work much more effectively. Believe me, it is worth it. 5. Find low energy study methods The best form of studying for me is making study/revision notes using many different sources of information, then reciting them. I can't do it every day though. On some days my executive dysfunction is bad and I don't have energy to write study notes. That's when I use my low energy study methods. My favorite is YouTube. Crash Course is rather brief, but good when you are unfamiliar with the subject and need an introduction and a great explanation of the basics. Khan Academy is more detailed and has lectures for many different subjects. Just searching YouTube for good videos also works sometimes. For me this is an amazing study method because it is engaging enough but passive - all I need to do is watch and listen. It's not perfect, but it's better than doing nothing. Find a low energy study method that works for you and use it. It will make a huge difference on "low on spoons" days. 6. Feed your brain Your brains favorite fuel is a simple sugar: glucose. And it needs a lot of it. Human brain consumes around 20% of all calories the body needs, and it weighs less than 10% of the total body mass. When you eat carbohydrates, your body can extract sugar directly from it. When you eat fats or proteins, your body needs to metabolize them to produce sugar. Your diet should contain all kinds of foods, and you shouldn't eat too much carbs, especially simple carbs. HOWEVER. When you feel tired and can't concentrate, sometimes it's because your glucose levels are low. If you don't have metabolic issues like diabetes, a sugary snack can help get you back into working mode. Chocolate, fruits and sweet drinks like tea, coffee or juice are all great for giving you a quick sugar boost. Some people say even the taste of sweet in their mouth helps them concentrate and study, and chewing gum with an artificial sweetener is enough for that. So if you do this in moderation, a sugar boost is great for low energy studying. Just don't abuse it. It loses the effect if overused. 7. Be compassionate to yourself No matter how hard your try, sometimes life is just difficult. It's okay. It's okay to fail a test or an exam, it's always a learning opportunity. It's okay to not get the grades you wanted, it can be a totally random thing. It's okay to miss class sometimes, everyone does it. It's okay to take breaks, you earned them. It's okay to ask for help, you deserve it. Measure your success by how hard you tried, not the result you got. And be kind to yourself. If you did your best (which definitely doesn't mean exhausting yourself to a point of mental breakdown), it's enough. That's all I have to share. Hope it helps. What are your low energy tips and tricks? Share them in the replies!

[jalmostauthorblog]

How I Came to Meditation

Fade in

Tibetan bowl music plays

Jacob

(calm tone)

This is Tibetan bowl music, it’s made by rubbing a wooden stick - I don’t know the proper name for the instrument - along the interior of a brass bowl. Just listen to it for a little while.

Music continues to play

Jacob

It’s soothing, isn’t it? It’s meant to help with meditation: sit and listen to it with your closed, slowly  breathing in and out, focusing on nothing but the rhythmic humming of the bowl as it fades into the distance. Monks do it to gain spiritual enlightenment, to detach themselves from the physical world and gain access to higher form of existence. I’m an atheist, I don’t believe there’s a higher form of existence than this one; I believe you die, and that’s it, no reincarnation, no heaven, no hell. But everyday, I find the quietest space I can, and sit and listen to this for ten to twenty minutes, just so I can be ten percent less manic about everything going on in my life.

Intercut sounds: Car horns honking, people’s voices in a crowded dining hall, loud abrasive rock music

Silence

Tibetan bowl music plays again

Jacob

This lyric essay is about meditation, and how the various stressors in my life, including my struggles in school, relationships, and really, life in general pushed to rely on it as a necessary tool for maintaining my sanity.

(Music fades out)

Jacob

It’s ironic, I thought going to college would turn me into an adult, that jumping into an environment where I’d be on my own for the first time in my life would magically endow me with all the skills necessary to successfully navigate the real world. In truth, it made me feel like a child, dealing with the crushing sense of incompetence that comes from having to do things you’re not entirely sure you know how to.

Intercut narration

Jacob

(mildly anxious tone)

Read chapters one through eighteen of ‘Tess of the d’Urbervilles by Thursday; Memorize anatomical terms for lab practicum; jog for at least thirty minutes every morning; remember to eat healthy; read at least one news article to stay informed; get involved around campus; schedule time to meet with your professors; join Linkedin and start making connections; update resume - oh shit, I don’t have a resume; revise essay for Principles of Literary Study; read a book for fun; get eight hours of sleep.

(Calming nature sounds play)

Jacob

Before I came to Rutgers, my life was simple: I lived with my parents in their house in Lake Hopatcong, they paid for all my food, clothing, and utilities; even though I was an adult, they didn’t mind still providing for me, I cleaned up around the house, never got in trouble, and kept to myself. I was also working on my associate’s degree at County College of Morris, in Randolph. To be honest, I would have rather gone straight to a university, but my final grades from high school were not impressive, so community college was my only option. CCM wasn’t easy, but I never found myself having panic attacks, at least until my last semester there.

It was spring of 2016, and I only needed two more courses to get my associate’s degree, the only problem was, they needed to be science classes. I’m an english nerd, having to dissect frogs was never my forte. My first trouble came when I had to take my first exam for Concepts in Biology - basically Biology for non-bio majors. I had studied my notes for almost two weeks, but when I sat down to take the test, it all just escaped me, there questions to things I didn’t remember going over in class, lists of terms that all seemed to be describing the same thing. When my mom picked me up that afternoon, I was a nervous wreck.

sound of heart pounding

            Jacob

I told her everything I just told you, and that I was afraid I’d fail, and not graduate in time to transfer to Rutgers. She did the typical mom thing, told me it would alright, then suggested I go online and try to find a video or something about relaxation exercises. Like any 23-year-old, I was hesitant to take my mother’s advice, but I knew I didn’t want to feel like this anymore, so I went to YouTube and searched for “meditation,” and found a twenty minute exercise led by a pretty, dark-haired woman named Melissa. I closed the blinds in my bedroom, started the video ….

Sound of heart pounding stops

Jacob

(relieved tone)

… and it worked. Twenty minutes later I opened my eyes ad felt better than I had in … I don’t know how long. It was like magic, everything came to me clearly and I could concentrate. I played the video and did the exercise every other, and finished out my last semester at CCM with Bs in both my science courses. Now, all my classes are in subjects I actually enjoy, I still get stressed from time-to-time about the work I have to do, but now I have a tool I can pull out of my pocket anytime I need it.

When you think about it, school is easy, you just follow directions, do whatever the teacher or the professor asks you to do, with your success depending on how much effort you’re willing to put in - work is pretty much the same, as is paying your bills, cooking, and taking care of your house. So many of the big parts of adult life that people complain of as being daunting, really aren’t, if you just follow the instructions. Of course, there’s one component of living in the real world that doesn’t come with instructions; one crucial, mysterious part of life that can be absolutely disastrous to navigate if one is not properly prepared.

(‘Mowgli’s Road,’ by Marina and the Diamonds starts playing)

Jacob

(sarcastic tone)

Relationships! Aren’t they just so much fun? Isn’t trying to find another human being, whom you find attractive, and who finds you attractive, and with whom you have enough emotional and intellectual compatibility to enjoy spending time around, as-well-as confess your deepest held hopes, dreams, and fears just sooooo easy? Especially when you consider the fact, that you have to pick this person out of the seven billion some odd people on this Earth? No? Well welcome to my world ass hole.

Romance has always eluded me, my parents didn’t talk to me about it growing up, nor did I want them to, I wasn’t interested in dating in junior high and high school, I just didn’t think it was the right time to do such things; and even if I was interested, I still wouldn’t have asked my mother and father for advice, for reasons I won’t go into here. As I would find out later, however, I was only screwing myself over. When I started at community college, I thought love would just happen to me, I’d meet a cool girl, and we’d just hit it off. But, that did not happen. I had no idea how to engage with women I was interested - literally no idea. And if one happened to be interested in me, I would magically lose all my social skills, I’d curl up into a fetal position, and find that I had forgotten how to use my mouth to communicate.

Again, I just didn’t know what to do, dating doesn’t come with a syllabus, there’s no rubric for asking a girl out, and you can’t go to office hours to learn where your flirting needs improvement. Yes, you can learn how to do these things, but I just was never able to: my older brother is gay, so I can’t talk to him about women, and I was never good at making friends - boys or girls - so there was never anyone I could ask about these things. Like any awkward, lovelorn boy in the twenty-first century I turned to the internet - I don’t mean porn, pull your mind out of the garbage.  I found articles on where to meet girls, how to approach them, what to say and how to hold their attention, all of it sounding reasonable. But, like any book worm, I know that it’s one thing to read about something, and another to actually translate it to the real world.

‘Mowgli’s Road’ fades out

(condescending, self-deluded tone)

So I decided to wait until I transferred to university, to an environment where I thought I could more easily pursue my quest. I convinced myself that community college just wasn’t a good place to find love: it was a county college, so people were coming from all over, and it just wouldn’t be convenient if I met someone I liked, and they happened to live in another town. No, it wouldn’t be convenient at all.  Also, these were only community college girls, they weren’t at the intellectual level I needed for a partner, the girls at university would be much more suitable.

So I’m at university, no more excuses, I’m surrounded by women my own age, here (I assume) looking for the same thing I am … and I just can’t make it happen. The closest I came was last semester, when there was a girl in my creative writing class I had a crush on. I planned it all out: before class started I would politely ask her to step to the side with me, where I would look her in the eyes, and ask her if she would like to go out with me. If she said yes, great; if she said no, I’d just brush it off: ‘Oh, that’s cool.’ But sure enough, I chickened out. I waited until class ended, and slipped her a note with ‘Will you go out with me?’ hastily scribbled on it. She picked it up, saw what I had written, and put the note away without even looking at me.

Down tempo, angry rock music starts playing

Jacob

(bitter and distressed)

I’d see couples walking around holding hands, here moaning from bedrooms late on weekend nights, and just become consumed with slow-burning rage, I’d want to scream at people: ‘Why is it easy for you, and not for me?’ And it felt good a while, it felt good getting angry, at least for a little while. I know that this was no way to live, so I did what I know I had to do.

Angry rock music stops

Silence

Tibetan bowl music plays

     Jacob

Meditation functions in the opposite way people think it does, people think you’re supposed to clear your mind of everything, when in fact, you’re supposed to focus on whatever is causing you distress. Sitting there, my eyes closed, I thought of all the anger I felt at not being able to figure out love, and I realized, all that anger I felt, was anger at myself. I realized the reason I kept stopping myself from doing things the way I knew I was supposed to, was because I was afraid of doing everything right and still failing. When the music stopped, and I opened my eyes, I knew that if I wanted to find love, I needed to admit there were things about myself I needed to work on before I was ready to give my life over to another person. I had to stop beating myself up because my life wasn’t what I thought it should be. How could I expect someone to love me if I couldn’t love myself?

In the West, and especially here in America, I feel like we’re conditioned to not look within ourselves for the source of our problems. We think everything can be solved by changing our external circumstances, by buying things, taking pills, blasting our emotions at the people and things that make us angry. We’ve surrounded ourselves with so much noise, that we’ve forgotten what it truly means to listen. That’s what meditation does for me, it helps me to detach myself from all the commotion crashing over me, to be in the moment, and realize, that even though I’ll always have problems in my life, I have the tools within myself to stop them from controlling me.

Music fades out

[creepingsharia]

Uncle Sam Conducts Another “Anti-Islamic” Purge

Originally posted on April 28, 2012

Stealth surrender. War on Terror over. War on American citizens rages on. Of course what needs to happen is a purge of Islamists from any and all leadership positions in the U.S. who push these efforts (and possibly pay for them). Diana West has much more on yesterday’s post. Full story via The Death of the Grown-Up | Uncle Sam Conducts Another “Anti-Islamic” Purge.

Nazis disposing of "objectionable material" that undermined Big Lies of the Third Reich

It’s probably fair to call Spencer Ackerman of Wired.com the king of the see-no-Islam beat. Whenever the government — first, the FBI, now, “the entire US military” — decides to purge training materials about Islam that undermine the Big Lie that “Islam is a religion of peace,” Ackerman seems to be the one to break the story. Something to be proud of in the coming caliphate — probably good for a pasha-ship, at least.

The latest from the Voice of Submission:

The chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff on Tuesday ordered the entire U.S. military to scour its training material to ensure it doesn’t contain anti-Islamic content, Danger Room has learned. The order came after the Pentagon suspended a course for senior officers that was found to contain derogatory material about Islam.

Guess what? Any course about Islam that is not a fanciful whitewash is going to contain derogatory material about Islam because Islam is based on principles such as supremacism and censorship, not to mention practices such as polygamy, slavery and killing apostates, all of which free people consider reprehensible — hence “derogatory.”

But was the “derogatory” material in the course factual? (I am currently awaiting a response from the public affairs officer at the staff college where said course was taught.)

The extraordinary order by General Martin Dempsey, the highest-ranking military officer in the U.S. armed forces, was prompted by content in a course titled “Perspectives on Islam and Islamic Radicalism” that was presented as an elective at the Joint Forces Staff College in Norfolk, Virginia. The course instructed captains, commanders, lieutenant colonels and colonels from across all four armed services that “Islam had already declared war on the West,” said Lt. Gen. George Flynn, Dempsey’s deputy for training and education.

“It was inflammatory,” Flynn told Danger Room on Tuesday. “We said, ‘Wait a second, that’s really not what we’re talking about.’ That is not how we view this problem or the challenges we have in the world today.”

The strong response by the Pentagon brass illustrates growing sensitivity around the issue since Danger Room’s investigation of anti-Islam material in the FBI’s counterterrorism training last September. That story sparked strong condemnation of the training material from the U.S. Attorney General on down, and prompted the White House to order a review of U.S. counterterrorism training last October [links in the original].

Despite that White House order, the “Perspectives” course, taught since 2004, not only evaded review, but had defenders in the Joint Forces Staff College that taught it.

Danger Room first learned about the course last month, and determined that one of its guest lecturers was Stephen Coughlin, who has taught FBI and U.S. Army audiences that Islamic law is a danger to U.S. national security. We sought comment from a representative for the Joint Forces Staff College, who defended the propriety of the course [link in the original].

Stephen Coughlin delivers impeccably sourced briefs on jihad (“enemy threat doctrine”) based on facts, sacred texts and law books, all as codifed by the most authoritative Islamic sources. I know: I’ve heard his briefs on multiple occasions.

Feedback from students has been “mostly positive, usually around the 90% range,” Steven Williams, a spokesman for the college, e-mailed Danger Room on Mar. 14. “Students generally appreciate thought-provoking discussion and the freedom to consider critical perspectives.”

The Pentagon, though, told a very different story Tuesday. Flynn disclosed that since an unspecified “revision” of the course in the summer of 2011, multiple officers who attended the course had raised internal objections about its presentation of Islam and Muslims. He estimated that about 20 officers attend each eight-week elective course, which is offered four times a year.

Flynn said he heard about the objectionable material on Friday after a colonel enrolled in the course complained about the anti-Islam lessons. “We looked at it and we found the material to be objectionable and we started digging into it to see, how did the course get this way?” Flynn said.

Objectionable, obshmectionable — is the material true? Is the enemy threat doctrine relevant to training senior staff officers charged with defending the country against it? Oops, I forgot — “the war on terror” (whatever that was) is over.

The course was scheduled to hold its second weekly meeting of the semester on Wednesday. But class will not be in session.

It all sounds a little like Heidelberg University in the 1930s, where a lot of classes were not in session once senior Nazi officials closed them (and their Jewish professors) down, after which Nazis threw what they considered to be “objectionable material” on a bonfire on May 17, 1933. Or maybe it sounds more like classrooms in the Soviet Union when, after the new encyclopedia (whitewash) of Soviet history came out around 1940 or so, all conflicting (read: factual) study materials (and conflicting teachers) were also purged.

Flynn has appointed a two-star general to spend the next 30 days investigating how the course came to include anti-Islam material in apparent contravention of the White House directive.

Can’t wait to read that. Does it start with the birth of Mohammed?

Accordingly, Dempsey has issued a letter to the chiefs of all four military services and the leaders of the military’s regional commands to make extra-sure that their own educational and training materials “are consistent with our values,” said Brig. Gen. Richard Gross, Dempsey’s senior legal adviser.

“Possibly, we did not follow the procedures we should have followed in academically approving the course, but that’ll be formally determined when we complete the inquiry into this,” Flynn said.

Last month, Williams, at the Joint Forces Staff College, assured Danger Room that the course followed the White House-approved guidelines issued by the Department of Homeland Security (.pdf) to prevent anti-Islam material from being taught by the U.S. government. He described the class as including “the basic tenets of Islam; the context in which it was founded; the life of the Prophet Mohammed; Islam’s early development; the practice of Islam in various countries; the foundations and principles of terrorism; the roots of Islamic militancy, and a broad overview of various Islamic radical groups and their philosophies” [links in the original].

But although the course material is unclassified, Williams would not disclose it to Danger Room. Flynn spoke more candidly about the material on Tuesday.

“We have an elective that did not meet the educational standards or the values of our JPME enterprise, so we’re going to suspend the course,” Flynn said Tuesday, using the acronym for joint professional military education. He added that his inquiry will determine whether “academically, did it go through the academic review process to make this truly an accredited course we should be teaching.”

Flynn’s inquiry will examine the chain of command to determine how the inappropriate material got into a course taught to senior military leaders. Flynn said there was as yet no indication that the anti-Islam instructions had disseminated beyond the Joint Forces Staff College, but the various inquiries will have to determine that.

“We’ll take whatever action is warranted,” Flynn said.

[symbianosgames]

The following blog post, unless otherwise noted, was written by a member of Gamasutra’s community. The thoughts and opinions expressed are those of the writer and not Gamasutra or its parent company.

Over the course of my senior year in college, I've been hard at work on a visual novel dubbed Streams of Nurture. As both a passion project and academic piece, Streams of Nurture represents an interesting case study for transforming one of my most ancient interests, food production, into an interactive affair that combines the dramatic qualities of an entertainment title with a real-world topic characteristic of serious games. In other words, I wanted to leverage the concept of "learning through play" to create a game that felt both purposeful and engrossing.

With my project officially submitted to the Worcester Polytechnic Institute database, I can now share with you the report detailing the development cycle for the visual novel. Throughout the coming weeks, I shall be publishing a subsection of the paper penned for Streams of Nurture. Each part will focus on a particular design and production aspect of the game, from the way the storytelling was conceived to the iterative art process that governed the title's presentation.

This week's post in a series of design articles explains the general production cycle of Streams of Nurture. If you're interested in reading about the pre-production, narrative and audiovisual phases for my visual novel, feel free to peruse the first, second and third articles I published on my title’s development process.

NOTE: I didn't single-handedly develop the game. Although I handled the narrative design, coding and writing for Streams of Nurture, my partners Liam Miller and Dave Allen were wholly responsible for the art and audio respectively. As such, the pronoun "we" will be used to acknowledge their invaluable contribution to this project.

Project schedule

In terms of scheduling, Streams of Nurture shares some similarities with other projects conducted within and beyond WPI’s game design major, while still embodying its fair share of quirks. On one hand, most of the visual novel’s major development milestones were set and achieved throughout three academic quarters. However, the individual parts that constitute it (story, art, sound, and playtesting) were not built concurrently. Instead, each of us worked full-time on the project without taking any classes across two different academic quarters to plug in the major pieces, with the first half of the spring semester being dedicated to the polish pass.

For the narrative, Michel spent the entirety of Fall 2016 organizing the documentation created for the game’s story and subsequently writing the basic dialog that expounded details about the aquacultural process. The lines Michel penned also contained figments of his personality in the characters that he would further flesh out in future quarters since he wished to get the practical details in first before finding ways to trim it and make the writing tighter and more coherent. In short, he adopted an iterative approach to storytelling so that the revisions to the dialog would not affect the overall structure and pacing of the narrative he wished to impart.

As for the art, the process of designing, developing and polishing was roughly planned to fit within each quarter the team was working on the project. Fall 2016 was when ideas were being formed and set in stone for the following semester to collect photographs, produce drawings, complete the style transfer processes per each image and drawing, then finally polish what was needed. Liam was not officially registered for the project until the end of 2016, but given the project being dependent on just two people (at the time), he felt the earlier the team began work, the better. The busiest quarters were those consisting of developing and implementing the art (late Fall 2016 and early Spring 2017), given the abundant number of scenes and characters. The workload proved more intensive than anticipated, and lasted well into Spring 2017.

Source control and backups

To ensure that the work updated properly across different devices and would not get lost to hard crashes and corrupt drives, the team made use of a cloud-based BitBucket repository, using SourceTree as a Windows client (see Figure 40).

Figure 40. SourceTree, the Windows client used to manage source control.

Original image by Michel Sabbagh

These tools allowed us to upload (“push”) and download (“pull”) changes to the visual novel’s script and assets, based on files stored in a BitBucket folder maintained on our PCs. As an additional precaution, the team and advisors regularly backed up the project folder on several flash drives kept in different locations to minimize the possibility of having our progress vaporized by a mangled repository.

Thankfully, the data for Streams of Nurture worked seamlessly with BitBucket and SourceTree, and we never encountered any issues that stalled development of our project.

Communication

Along with updating changes to the game’s script and audiovisual assets, the team also met at least twice a week throughout the 2016-17 academic year to report any progress with the art, writing and other design elements. Such meetings occurred between the students and advisors in the game design suite in Salisbury Labs on weekdays and solely among the developers at the Gordon Library on weekends.

During those gatherings, we brainstormed potential ideas for our game that could be incorporated further down the line, such as additional visual flourishes and subplots that would flesh out the characters even more (e.g. flashback sequences hinting at the protagonist’s hazy relationship with their dad). The team also relayed concerns about hitting particular milestones within the academic year, such as getting rid of all the placeholder art and polishing all of the character lines to make them sound more natural and dramatic.

Figure 41. Slack, the project management service used for team communications.

Original image by Michel Sabbagh

Outside of the aforementioned meetings, the team also made use of the chat service Slack (see Figure 41) to share updates and comments that would affect the final version of the game, such as last-minute changes to the art and additional information on the salmon industry. The channel we created for our purposes (VN_MQP) included several sub-sections: design, general, look-and-feel, meetings, random and audio. This allowed us to keep the chat box clean and relevant, which led to faster responses to questions about Streams of Nurture’s condition.

Skeleton

During the fall semester, the entire team focused on building the visual novel from the ground-up using the research and references we documented to get a solid sense of how the game would look, sound, and feel as the player progresses through it.

Given the sheer size and scope of the project, we knew that we had to undertake an iterative approach to the development of our title. This meant that we first had to create rough versions of the art and script before we could polish everything so that they matched the vision we laid out from the beginning.

So before we got started churning out the audiovisuals and written content for the title, Professors Moriarty and Sutter sat down with us to discuss the step-by-step process we would go through in terms of creating the basic structure and design for Streams of Nurture. This skeletal framework (see Figure 42), which served as the substrate upon which we would plug in more polished versions of the artworks and dialog, was comprised of placeholder assets and scripted scenes that made the visual novel entirely playable from start to finish.

Figure 42. The game’s skeletal framework, before and after polish.

Original photos by Michel Sabbagh

For the art, we made use of Photoshop to generate grayboxes that had the names of the asset and their (sub)directories explicitly baked onto them. These files would allow us to substitute finalized artworks for the blank images that initially corresponded to the background scenes in Streams of Nurture. This approach also applied to the characters themselves, who were depicted as front-/left-/right-facing black silhouettes standing in their respective onscreen positions.

Narrative-wise, the key was to incorporate as much relevant information about the different farming methods and techniques the player would be exploring (see Figure 43), as well as the various personalities inhabiting the game world. Macro and micro details about the aquacultural appliances such as the real-life Thermolicer and words denoting the kinds of emotions characters would feel rather than outright utter in the final game were par for the course in terms of producing functional dialog that advanced the plot, but had yet to possess more characteristic essence.

Having a skeleton from the outset proved most beneficial for future iterations of the game, as the team was able to make quick and effective modifications to the code without harming the visual novel’s overall story structure and artistic integrity.

  Figure 43. Expository scene explaining the use of fish feed pellets.

Original image by Liam Miller.

Polishing

During the holiday break, the team decided to proceed to the next stage in the development process: the polish pass. With the placeholders having served their purpose of getting the title to work from a technical perspective, the time came for us to bring the narrative and artistic components of Streams of Nurture up to a level that would make it attractive to the average player all across the board.

Figure 44. Daphne’s character in the game’s near-final iteration.

Original images by Liam Miller

In terms of dialog, the primary goal was to trim down any unnecessary lines and scenes that bogged down the pacing of the game and made the title feel bloated in parts. Not only that, but the team also wanted to alter the dialect for each of the characters so that they sounded more unique and convincing. Originally, their vernacular was too uniform and sophisticated for them to feel believable, instead sounding pretentious and unnatural. With the help of the character profiles, though, Michel was able to distinguish each individual from one another through their speech patterns and general demeanors (see Figure 44). The process of doing so took a little over two months to accomplish, and the result was a considerably leaner and meaner narrative that communicated information more concisely and, in some ways, wittily.

With the art, polishing backgrounds and characters came down to adjusting minor yet vital details about the subject matter of the scene, tending more specifically to what was being portrayed through the dialog, and of course cleaning up any abnormalities in the illustrations for the sake of achieving a more professional look. To elaborate upon this, any feature in the backgrounds that either did or did not belong in the scene was either added or removed. One mentionable polishing factor that came into play twice while working on the art were the tweaks and changes that Alter was making, which would often change their resolution output or manipulate their algorithms to fine-tune how style was transferred. These changes produced noticeable differences in stylized backgrounds before Alter updates and changes, making it mandatory to redo each of the images we had already finished. Other than that, cleaning a few drawings of character borders was one small yet vital part of the polishing process to produce the most appealing visual novel we could.

For sound and playtesting, Spring 2017 was when both components were being extensively worked on after several months of delay. Like the narrative and art, audio benefited from the same iterative process that defined much of the title’s development cycle. By adding and fine-tuning musical layers for the game’s main theme and sourcing references for the sound effects, Dave was able to put together a compact but potent soundscape that provided the right amount of atmosphere complementing the town of Duntale and its surroundings.

[embedded content]

And that's all she wrote (for Part IV, at least)! As I mentioned before, more parts will be posted on a weekly basis.

Let me know what you think of my article in the comments section, and feel free to ask me questions! I’ll do my best to get back to you as promptly as possible.

Personal blog: http://ift.tt/2jHSIDs

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Watfen64

LinkedIn: http://ift.tt/2iKYMac

Facebook: http://ift.tt/2jI2y8n

Email: michelsabbagh2003@msn.com

[jobsnhomes1]

60 Days Preparation Plan for BSNL JE

Recruitment for BSNL JE, Junior Engineer (Earlier known as TTA) is very tough. In order to qualify you need to go through an entrance exam conducted by the BSNL.

The exam is conducted in the month of September each year. However recently because of increase in applicants exams will be conducted more than once a year.

Hence you need to enquire more.

Candidate should have proper study plan to achieve success in competitive exam.

However in this article we will tell you how you can prepare for BSNL JE in just two months. with proper planning.

The competition is very tough because for just 2700 seats thousands of candidates from reputed colleges apply for this exam.

You have to prepare beforehand and rank high on the merit list so that you can be selected.

BSNL JE Preparation

BSNL JE Exam Syllabus and Preparation

BSNL JE exam can be divided into three different parts. The first one is general ability, second is basic engineering and the third one is specialization.

The JE exam is 3 hours long with 200 questions for 200 marks. Here is the exam syllabus.

As I said earlier you can prepare for the whole exam in just 60 days.

So the first 35 days are for preparing these 3 different parts.

General Ability in 5 Days

The first part is general ability and you can prepare it in just 5 days.

As you know general ability section will contain questions related to English and general knowledge.

Out of 200 marks the weightage for General ability is only 20 marks.

So you don’t have to devote much time for general ability because it is just 10% of entire question paper.

They will ask questions related to comprehension, synonyms and fill in the blanks testing your basic English.

If you do not know any answer then please leave it because there is a negative marking.

Finish general ability within 5 days.

Basic Engineering in 15 Days

Second part is very important because they will ask you questions for 90 marks. So 45% of the questions will be related to basic engineering.

Here questions are asked related to all the branches of engineering.

These branches can be divided into five categories. Here are the branches one by one.

Applied Mathematics Basic Electricity Applied Physics Digital Techniques Electronic Device and Circuit The questions that will be asked are according to diploma syllabus and not hardcore engineering.

The questions are formula and memory based. They will ask about equations, definitions, and other important points.

The questions are not tough like GATE or other competitive exams.

You have to practice questions from the above 5 branches.

You can prepare for Basic engineering in 15 days.

Specialization in 15 Days

Just like Basic Electronics Specialization is also for 90 marks that is 45% of the whole exam.

Here you will be asked question from a particular subject. The questions will be asked from the core subjects of various disciplines.

You have to sort out the required subjects and prepare for the exam accordingly.

Here is the list of subjects from which questions will be asked.

Electrical Communication Network, Filters and Transmission Lines Instruments and Measurements Control Systems Microprocessors Computer As I said questions that will be asked are more theoretical and not numerical.

Questions are knowledge based and not tough mathematical ones.

So read about all the subjects and don’t go into the depth. You can easily prepare in just 15 days.

Study Material for All 3 Parts

Here will be talking about the study material for all the three sections.

For first one which General Ability you can go for any regular general knowledge book that deals with current affairs. For English you can use Aggarwal’s Book, these books designed for competitive exams.

I don’t think you have to bother much about the first section.

For the basic engineering you have to read mathematics and you can use any competitive book from Arihant, Aggarwal or even regular engineering first semester course book.

You can also buy books from Shakti Publications.

For Specialization I recommend you to read all the books that you have studied during your engineering especially from semester 5 to semester 8.

You can search online for all the books for the 3 sections.

Focusing on Specialization Part Again in 5 Days

Here we would like to talk more about specialization part because it is very important.

You have to prepare smartly so you score more in the exam. Prepare for easier subjects first and read tougher subjects later on.

Here is the order in which you should prepare subjects.

Electrical should be the first one. Instrumentation and Measurements is second. Network, Filters and transmission is third. Control system fourth. Finally you can prepare for Microprocessor, communication and computers. You have to give another 5 days for specialization section.

Previous Papers and Mock Test Series in Last 10 Days

Now you have spent almost 40 days reading all the sections.

In next 10 days you have to go through all the previous year’s questions papers and test serious conducted by the BSNL.

For previous year question papers you can go to internet and download all the papers with their solutions.

You must try to solve these questions so you will get an idea how questions are asked in the exams.

Practice for at least last 5 to 6 year question papers.

Then you can also go for mock test online which tests you before you take on the real exam.

It helps you to revaluate how well you are prepared.

You can do this in just 10 days.

Entire Revision in Just 10 Days

So you have spent 50 days and now last 10 days are for revision.

Revision is very important.

Start revision with Specialization section. Read the subjects like Electrical, Microprocessors, Communication, Network, Filters, Transmission and more.

For basic engineering read applied mathematics and physics, electronic devices and arithmetic.

Read theory and also try to solve questions. Remember all the formulas and definitions.

That’s it you are done for the next BSNL JE exam in 2017.

You have spent all your 60 days wisely.

8 General Tips for BSNL JE Preparation

Here are some general tips to take care while preparing for BSNL JE exam.

The first tip is always stick to the subject. You do not have to go beyond your given course material. Do not get too deep in a subject because the exam tests your theoretical knowledge and not the understanding. Go after easier subjects first and try difficult ones later. You can leave tricky questions because there is negative marking. Always revise what you have studied. Do not forget to go through previous year question papers and online mock test series. Always take your engineering course book seriously. Finally be confident and take no stress.

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