#and personally I find it rather tedious to read because...Well let's just say I'm not very partial to people marrying their cousins

[starpros-sunshine]

If I loved Wataei less I might be able to talk about them more....

[prince-liest]

I’m a sex-repulsed ace, and reading the latest chapter of 666 (as well as your analysis here on Tumblr) made me realize that I have been subconsciously thinking about MY OWN sexuality from an allo perspective? And that it has kinda been messing me up?? Like, ever since I learned that sexual attraction was actually a Thing and that it’s Important To People, I had been carrying around a fear of being deficient in some way and not being able to love to the same extent as allos. (1)

Even though I know logically that’s complete garbage and totally untrue, I felt left out of the loop because people seemed to care strongly about this thing I couldn’t even imagine. Whenever it looked like a relationship might happen I panicked for a reason that I couldn’t understand. But now I’m starting to realize that it’s because I was subconsciously terrified of an ‘ulterior motive’ behind the other person’s reasons for wanting to be with me. (2) That part of the reason they even cared was because of something I don’t experience. So thank you, because this realization just clicked into place while reading your work. The thing is, this way of thinking was just internalized in such a way that I didn’t even realize it was there until literally this week. And I think you’re right; one of the main reasons behind that is because I’ve always consumed media written from an allo perspective. (3) If ace/aros are shown at all, they’re depicted as “lacking” and their character development usually revolves around being “fixed” by the story. When I was ~10 years old my mom sometimes let me watch the Big Bang Theory with her (looking back, maybe not the best decision). Anyways, there was one episode deep into the series where Sheldon (who for the past nineish seasons was probably the closest thing to mainstream ace rep) has sex with his girlfriend for the first time. (4) Afterwards, he says something along the lines of “that was better than I thought it would be”, and it’s presented as a Very Good Thing and a big step in their relationship. I think a lifetime of stuff like that makes it very easy to internalize aphobia and feel like the lesser part of the relationship. Or to feel like the other partner is making a huge sacrifice to be with you. That got wayy too long, sorry. All that was just a lot of words to say that I appreciate you. Take care of yourself!(5)

The portrayal of asexuality that you see in media being almost exclusively as you described is very tedious to me because it presumes that something is inherently lacking in aro/aceness rather than that feeling of "lacking" being something that is induced by societal norms. Actually, one of the things that I find additionally alienating is that fandom spaces specifically have been getting better and better about ace characters - but got damn does fandom not jive with aromanticism. Like, a character doesn't want to fuck? That's becoming a liiiittle more fine, it's 2024, we stan consent. But not shipping someone romantically?? Not so easy, now.

I'm glad that my work has been something that resonated with you in this respect! Alastor cares a lot about his reputation as a demon but is pretty blatantly a person who could not possibly give less of a shit about being "wrong" for not being experiencing romantic or sexual attraction. The explanation Viv gave at one point for his own understanding of himself (that he thinks he's just "waiting for the right woman") actually stuck out to me a lot because it's a very "well, nothing is wrong with me for not feeling anything, it's the world that's failed to produce a suitable person" perspective.

But having that kind of confident perspective of your own rightness in the world is really not often portrayed in media, or even in fandom, which even ten years ago was still in the throes of standardizing "Oh, no! Me, gay? These feelings are so wrong!" style m/m content and is honestly not that far off from essentially that for aro/ace characters.

Anyway, all of that is to say that there's not yet much out there that doesn't frame allo/amatonormative values as the default that "even aro/ace people can (and should want to) achieve," and that it's really fun to write a fic that is unequivocally from the perspective of a character who is aroace and doesn't see it as even remotely a fault in himself. Does he have moments where he's a little confused and trying to process how things fit for him? Absolutely. But he just doesn't strike me as the kind of guy who thinks he owes romance to Vox of all people, hahaha. I've written him trying to conform to allo/amatonormativity more with Mimzy, because I think the social standards of their time could push him into it, but Vox? Absolutely not, he does not respect Vox enough for it to even enter his mind.

And then, on the other hand, writing it from an aroace perspective centers the way that romantic and sexual interest can feel like a betrayal of a good thing. With a character like Alastor, it frames romantic and sexual attraction the same alien way that we usually see aromanticism and asexuality framed as.

In the end, this is just one of a plethora of different experiences that aro/ace people can have, but it's one that I really wanted to see represented more, so I'm very happy to write it. I'm glad that you're enjoying it!

[bubbleteasing]

In response to your last answered ask (not the same anon), I just want to let you know that your english is really really great, better than most native speakers that I know. The only mistakes I can think of are all spelling rather than comprehension or grammar issues. Even then, your spelling mistakes are so minor that I overlook them unless I'm reading a fic a second time... or a third time... or a fifth time... basically, any mistakes you have in your fics don't interrupt the flow of reading and your english skills are superb. Your fics' grammar and reading comprehension are all great and the quality of your stories/plot/characters are just so good overall that I don't think many readers would miss out on reading them just because of a few minor convention errors.

I do have a tip for new writers, though, and it's also something that you do really well in all your fics: one thing you must always remember is that whenever a new person is speaking, start a new paragraph.

Tea, you do such a great job at this... the chapter of acaat where reader and red go to couple's therapy comes to mind. I remember at the end notes of that chapter you said something about the dialogue (maybe that you thought there was too much of it? I don't remember exactly). The dialogue was not troublesome at all because it was natural and flowed well, but also because you started a new paragraph for each speaker, making it easy for readers to track who's saying what.

Basically, new writers, if you have multiple characters speaking and you put all their dialogue in one paragraph, it will be very confusing for readers to discern who is saying what, which can cause readers to have to reread and try to guess what's going on, and you don't want that. There are fics i've tried that are awesome in all other ways, but because they did not separate dialogue into different paragraphs, I just could not figure out who was saying what and could not understand the story. You could have all the english mistakes in the world, but it will still be readable if you lay your dialogue out correctly.

Anyway sorry for the long ask... I really appreciate all the work you've put into your fics, Tea! I hope anyone who reads this finds it helpful...

Oh wow, way to stroke my ego… thank you very much anon 😳 I know I still have a long way to go, but fuck it, I’ll take the compliment. Thank you ❤️

You’re so damn right!! I (personally) hate long paragraphs with different character’s dialogues. It’s hard to tell who’s saying what and honestly, I usually find myself dropping the entire fic because of that.

I actually went to check acaat and you’re right; it was on chapter 30 and I did say that I hoped it wasn’t too tedious to read since most of the chapter was just a very long dialogue (I personally love reading dialogues but I know I can’t speak for most people).

Even if you’re writing for the undertale fandom (yes, we know Papyrus’s the one speaking if you’re using capital letters, yada yada), you should separate the dialogue into different paragraphs to make it more fluid. It kind of makes me think everyone has the same voice if that makes any sense? Just let the characters take turns on each sentence 🤷‍♀️

I do have to say I just hate reading long paragraphs (not related to dialogues, just in general) so I end up avoiding writing them myself… which isn’t necessarily a good thing. I know I should describe surroundings to make people’s reading experience more immersive but here’s where my nonnative writer skills don’t come to light: using pretty words to describe common things are not my strength. I wish it was, but it isn’t.

Don’t be like me. Use paragraphs to describe things but separate dialogues when different characters are speaking.

Thank you very much for leaving this in my inbox! I hope the previous anon sees it.

[mediaevalmusereads]

Beauty and the Blacksmith. By Tessa Dare. Avon, 2013.

Rating: 3/5 stars

Genre: historical romance, novella

Part of a Series? Yes, Spindle Cove #3.5

Summary: Beautiful and elegant, Miss Diana Highwood is destined to marry a wealthy, well-placed nobleman. At least, that's what her mother has loudly declared to everyone in Spindle Cove.

But Diana's not excited by dukes and lords. The only man who makes her heart pound is the village blacksmith, Aaron Dawes. By birth and fortune, they couldn't be more wrong for each other...but during stolen, steamy moments in his forge, his strong hands feel so right.

Is their love forged strong enough to last, or are they just playing with fire?

***Full review below.***

Content Warnings: blood, danger associated with armed robbery, graphic sexual content

Overview: I completely blanked on the fact that there are a couple of novellas in this series, so here we are. I was looking forward to this novella because I'm getting a little tired of romances about titled heroes; a working class hero sounds like just the thing to shake things up. Unfortunately, I didn't find this book to quite live up to my expectations. While I don't think anything was "bad," I just personally wished the narrative was a little more robust. As it stands, the non-romance plot doesn't seem to support the stakes of the love story, so for that reason, this book gets 3 stars from me.

Writing: Dare's writing in this novella is comparable to the prose in the rest of the Spindle Cove series. It's quick, funny, and well-balanced, and if you're an avid romance reader, it will be pleasantly familiar. I don't have much to add that I haven't already said in other reviews.

Plot: The non-romance plot of this book follows Diana Highwood, the eldest daughter of the Highwood family, as she contemplates resisting her mother's efforts to marry her off to a titled gentleman. Diana has been living in a gilded cage her whole life; as the most beautiful of the Highwood daughters, her mother has always insisted that Diana would be the one to marry well and secure the family's future. However, Diana wishes to live her life for herself, and she plans to start doing so by pursuing her two year attraction to the village blacksmith, Aaron Dawes.

While I found the premise of this plot to be intriguing, in practice, it didn't quite play out in a way that I found satisfying. The narrative didn't do much to challenge the characters to grow or evolve and heavily featured some threads that turned out to have little consequence. For example, a chunk of this novella is devoted to preparing for a dramatic production of the legend of St. Ursula, with Diana cast as the lead in order to woo the titled host. However, I didn't necessarily feel like the play was doing much for Diana's development, and it felt more tedious to read about than exciting or engaging.

The subplot featuring the string of thefts was also fairly dull, as I didn't feel invested in it until it had the potential to affect Diana towards the end. I was surprised that no one tried to pin the crimes on Aaron, who was of a lower class, as that would have provided some ferile ground for exploring class issues in more depth. And I don't say this because I just want to novella to be about class; the class difference is a major issue in the protagonists' relationship, and I wish Dare had done more to show how different Diana's and Aaron's worlds are.

Characters: Diana, our heroine, is sympathetic in that she feels the heavy burden of being the sole source of hope for her family's future. I liked that much of her arc involved asserting her own desires and forging her own path rather than letting her mother dictate it instead. I do wish there had been more moments that built up her confidence, though. As it stands, it didn't feel like Diana was evolving so much as just deciding to be herself.

Aaron, our hero, is likable in that he's a warm, affectionate man who trusts Diana to assert her desires. But as likable as he is, I do wish Aaron had more of a personal arc; most of what he does is waver back and forth between caring about class difference and not caring, and the wavering made for an evolution that didn't quite feel believable.

Supporting characters are fine, though I don't have too much to say about them. They seem to do their jobs and then quickly disappear, but since this book is a novella, it didn't really bother me.

Romance: Diana and Aaron's romance is sweet but doesn't grow too much. While I really liked that their evolution as a couple included not caring about what other people think of their class difference, it also felt like they didn't grow much at all. At the beginning of this book, the two have been pining for each other for two years, so by the time they finally give themselves permission to be with each other, it seems like they're already in love. Personally, I most enjoy romance when I get to see how a couple goes from initial attraction to a deeper emotional intimacy, and it seemed like most of that development happened off page.

TL;DR: Beauty and the Blacksmith is refreshing in that it's not a love story involving a titled hero, but stumbles when it comes to building a meaningful plot. A lot of the love story seems to have already developed off page, and the main narrative doesn't do much to help the protagonists grow together as a couple.

[ink-and-dagger]

Of course this is totally optional (feel free to ignore this) but I’m pretty curious as to why you don’t like Vander. Personally I feel similarly to you i think? He’s not a fave but I don’t think he’s a bad guy, but I’m unable to articulate why exactly I don’t like him if that makes sense. Was hoping your views may resonate a bit? Idk

I'll give it a go!

Let me disclaimer this though because I really can't be bothered to fight with anyone. This is just my personal opinion and analysis. More than happy to be proved wrong when season 2 comes out if they end up expanding more on Vander's history, but at the moment I'm pretty set in my opinion of him.

I don't hate Vander. Nor do I think he's a bad character. I enjoy reading him in fics, and I'm certain I'll write him in future ones. He just isn't my favourite, and he irritates me at times.

I think the easiest way of explaining why I'm not a huge fan lies in one question

"Are you a good man?"

Vander and Silco share a lot of similarities. Both shown to be violent. Not above using threats or force to get their way. Both with long and complicated histories full of questionable deeds.

However.

If you asked Silco whether he considers himself to be a good man, I believe he'd say "No."

And yet, if you put the same question to Vander, it's my belief that he'd say "Yes."

And therein lies my issue with him.

I tend to find people and characters with hero complexes very tedious. Just my personal taste. And I sort of feel like Vander has one.

He whole-heartedly believes he's the good guy. And that bugs me. I kinda just wanna tell him to get over himself.

Vander always thinks that Vander is right.

And therefore, anyone who doesn't share his exact way of thinking is the enemy. He has blinkered vision, and an inability to think beyond tomorrow, or his immediate vicinity. As long as everything is okay in Vander's world [i.e the Lanes and his friends & family], he's content to forget the rest.

But see the thing is, the Undercity is bigger than just the Lanes. The Lanes is just a small section of the city. And more people live down there than just Vander's mates. So what about them? You have to be besties with Vander to qualify for protection?

Silco fights for Zaun.

Vander fights for Vander.

Which isn't my issue. I love villains. I love morally-grey and imperfect characters. I don't mind if a character has selfish motives or questionable drives. My issue isn't with Vander's actions or his goals, but rather his attitude and general opinion of himself.

If Vander wants to fight for Vander then go ahead my guy. But don't act so damn noble about it.

He likes to think of himself as this big, upstanding hero type. When he's actually no better than Silco. You could even argue he's no better than Piltover. He looks out for his own, and is content to ignore the rest.

I've seen some people comparing the two versions of Zaun between Act 1 and 2 under the different leadership.

It's true, under Vander the Lanes had a safer, more community-type feel to it. However, as I said before, the Undercity is bigger than just the Lanes. And a ✨#cosy-vibe UwU💕is pretty useless when the majority of people are starving and oppressed. Barely surviving and in no way thriving. Vander doesn't really concern himself with the well-being of Zaun as a whole.

I'm not saying Silco's reign is perfect either. The Undercity certainly doesn't feel as safe under his watch, and I'm not ignoring the drug problem [though this a whole other topic]. But aren't these issues that naturally occur alongside industrial progress? London has a lot more crime etc going on than a smaller, less advanced city for example. But despite this, Silco's leadership undoubtedly benefits the greatest amount of people. There are huge advances in technology, health, trade, business, and infrastructure. He literally makes the air safer to breathe. Silco advocates for Zaun as a whole.

But I digress. This isn't about who is a better leader. This is about Vander thinking he's this big, brave, gallant knight in shining armour because he rescued the princess, even though he left the village to be burned by the dragon.

So yeah, I guess those are my thoughts.

My issues with characters don't tend to stem from their actions, but rather their opinions of themselves.

It's kinda like when someone thinks they're a really nice person because they're kind to their friends and family even though they're a complete prick to the waiter at a restaurant. Yeah that really annoys me.

[sendnotes]

books i read in april.

this is going to be my thing from now on. i'll compile a list of all the books i read in a month and share my thoughts on each one every end of the month.

just so you know, i'm a little forgetful, and i have a tendency to forget names, plots, and other details. i'm hoping that writing these will aid my memory in recalling how i felt about each novel.

you can also find me on goodreads

so, let’s begin, shall we?

101 essays that will change the way you think (wiest, brianna)

self-help book

this book got off to a good start! some of the essays written (or should i say a collection of articles originally published on the thoughtcatalog website) made me think and consider my outlook on life, love, and so on.

the title overstates the case though. when i think of an essay, i picture something more argumentative and philosophical. not to mention that the majority of the ideas in this book are redundant. it made it difficult to get through. nonetheless, i was able to get past it because there were so many fantastic concepts and topics discussed.

overall, it's an interesting & worthwhile read for those who enjoy thinking outside the box.i lost count of how many times this book gave me aha moments. i swear, most of the entries soothed my mind and provided a great pick-me-up when life seemed to be frustrating.

the midnight library (haig, matt)

science fiction, fantasy fiction, psychological fiction

regrets, self-remorse, what ifs, family approval, drugs, dreams, love, passion, hatred, death, afterlife, multiverses, quantum physics, and a plethora of possibilities packed into a 304-page book.

i'll be honest: this book is already on my list of favorites. i'm simply blown away by how well-crafted and diverse the entire story unfolded.

a sci-fi novel with a dash of fantasy and a smidgeon of philosophy. if that's your thing, you should give this book a shot.

the first few pages of the book gave me an impression and led me to surmise it was going to be a cheesy ass chick lit novel that i'd only read and find enjoyable in high school. i was completely off base. it proved to be very mature, full of lessons, but delivered in a fun and entertaining manner— exactly my cup of tea.

it reminded me of a disney pixar film called soul, in which the afterlife is depicted in vivid detail. they differ on so many levels, but they both imagine life after death for people who are unsure of their path, purpose, and passion.

every chapter served a significant concept, so this book is well-deserved of a 5-star rating!

norwegian wood (murakami, haruki)

fiction, romance novel, bildungsroman

as i read the book and neared the end, all i could think about was how this book became one of murakami's most popular and influential works.

murakami offers a sprawling glimpse into the lives of a group of severely damaged youths grappling with the realities of what emptiness entails. take what you will from it.

i know a lot of people like it, which is fine. but please keep in mind that this book hit me square in the gut. it alternated between making me angry, sad, annoyed, and disgusted almost constantly. there isn't much else.

this book should come with a warning: "this is not a good place to start if you're new to murakami's works. this is not a representative of murakami's brilliance."

fist and foremost, the characters in this book are all repulsive.

toru watanabe was a fuckboy and a softboy rolled into one. what could possibly be worse than that? he'd have as many casual sexual partners as he could while also buttering a girl up by appealing to her emotions and displaying a "sensitive" and "vulnerable" side.

this book was made even more depressing by the fact that each female character was needy, weak, dysfunctional, and dependent. since they're all the same, i'm not going to go over each of these female characters one by one. you already get the idea.

reiko ishida, imo, was one of the best rendered sections of the novel. most likely because she had a better grasp on her emotions and goals than the still seeking youths... until, *spoiler alert* she wanted to do it with toru as well. a big disappointment.

to summarize, this book is primarily concerned with two topics: sex and death.

hidden meanings are everywhere, but when you get to the core, that's all that remains.

the four agreements: a practical guide to personal freedom (ruiz, miguel)

self-help book

first agreement ⏤ be impeccable with your word

this essentially means that you should not spew gossip or use words to harm others. because words have tremendous power and can cause significant harm. you are not only negatively affecting others with your hateful and thoughtless words, but you are also hurting yourself. this is something with which i generally agree. how i see it, when people are unhappy with themselves, they turn to others to make themselves feel better. as a result, they gossip about others in order to divert attention away from themselves.

second agreement ⏤don't take anything personally

alright. sure. don't let what others say about you bother you. it has everything to do with them and nothing to do with you. well, i don't entirely agree, but i think it's a fantastic idea in general. however, achieving this goal will be extremely difficult. i believe it would take a lot of practice to reach this level of zen. plus, i honestly believe that other people's opinions still matter because they keep you in check. the best advice is to not be swayed by these opinions, but to consider why they were expressed in the first place. see what you can do to improve yourself from there. sure, it can be difficult to deal with; after all, no one likes being told they're wrong or whatnot. but it's not all bad news because you can sometimes use criticism and judgment to give you a competitive edge. i mean- don't you think hearing someone else's point of view is also an opportunity to learn and progress? ruiz should have stressed that it's not just about "not taking it personally because you know you're not that person," but also about not retaliating with an extreme knee-jerk reaction even if you believe you're being unfairly criticized.

third agreement ⏤ don't make assumptions

this is a real eye-opener for me. i've noticed that whenever i become enraged by someone's words, it's usually due to my tendency to assume. personally, i can't help but make assumptions. i don't know what other people's motivations are, and i can't help but draw conclusions based on the information i have. even if the other person had no intention of causing me harm, it's too late. the thought has become ingrained in my mind, and i never ask for clarification out of pride or fear of appearing overly sensitive.

fourth agreement ⏤ always do your best

this section did not seem particularly useful to me. i mean, aren't we all reminded of this all the time? this section is filled with sloppy writing, in my opinion. as if he badly wanted to finish the book and impulsively thought: "okay, fourth agreement: always do your best. that should suffice. lmao"

overall opinion: the third agreement was my favorite, but the rest were a no-go. don't get me wrong, i appreciated his ideas, but i've heard them all a hundred times before. basically, the book's sole takeaway is that we are all suffering in some way in our daily lives, and we are all dealing with different issues. regardless, we all need to be kinder and gentler to ourselves and others.

the song of achilles (miller, madeline)

romance novel, historical Fiction, war story

i'll keep it short and sweet:

i really wouldn't have had this book any other way. miller's writing is breathtaking, so rich and full of lovely detail. it's incredibly a unique concept to me that authors are rewriting such ancient history and stories to make them lgbt+!

some suggest it's tedious, but i disagree. it isn't slow; rather, it is just right.

'cause at the end of the day, it's not about war, tragedy, or heroes - it's a slow-burning, organic love tale between two young men and their inevitable connection.

it's sad, tender, and painful, but in the best way possible.

circe (miller, madeline)

novel, historical fiction, fantasy fiction

"greek mythology, but with a feminist twist"?! sign me the hell up! this piqued my interest... only to leave me feeling completely let down. seriously now. circe was described as a "badass empowered woman," which was the single most compelling selling point for me, and thus the most wrenching disappointment, i must say.

sure, it demonstrated the value of feminine power, but it also did represent how this power can be a force of good or evil.

not to mention the fact that circe fucked a married man or two in this book- i mean- how is that an ~empowered woman~?

let's be clear right off the bat: madeline miller's follow-up to the song of achilles is epic in scope but not necessarily in execution. to me, this read more like a tedious island tale. regardless of how many five-star reviews this book has received... i just don't think it's well-deserved. don't get me wrong here. miller is a fantastic author with a lush writing! istg- i'm blown away by how beautifully she wrote and carefully chose her words. even the most mundane phrases were written poetically. after-all, it’s greek mythology. but how did she manage to make circe seem so... bland?

[mewnia]

I'm just wondering, now that you've played a little of crestoria (I assume from your meme) how much your opinion of the game has changed? I remember you answered it when it was announced and you weren't very fond of yuna and vicious designs

Oh! I faintly recall answering an ask about it, yes. Let’s see, that’s easy to find. The previous ask is here!

After reading my answer from 2019, I still agree with a few things. BUT! I also disagree with my statements from before and present you with new statements. This will be a rather long post because now that I’ve experienced the game so far (to the chapter that I meet Luke) I have some thoughts. 

“I wouldn’t mind seeing what the plot is!”

I agree! The plot honestly has me hooked, I love its concept and it certainly came out with perfect timing relating to “cancel culture” that we’re having problems with today. The only downside I’ve had with it is the inclusion of previous Tales characters every now and then. I don’t like that Milla and Velvet show up for a few seconds and then just leave without anyone questioning it too much. And they never mention them again?? Not to mention they totally drop Cress the moment we think he’s dead. I don’t think Kanata’s said anything to even hint at any grievance of Cress. Leon I don’t mind, he’ll probably come back. And this next Luke plot feels like the main cast is the side cast.

Oh that Reid plot was a thing. I totally forgot about it!

I understand there are side quests to answer some of these questions, but the fact that the MAIN CHARACTERS don't think too much about it doesn’t sit right with me. 

“Character designs I’m…not too excited about?”

I agree and disagree with this statement I’ve previously said. Before I said they don’t feel unified. I still agree with this, but I’ve found it aids the overall inclusion of other franchises in the mix. There’s a huge cast of different designs, might as well do the same to the main cast. 

HOWEVER, regarding Vicious, I’ve warmed up to his design. It expresses his personality really well that I can’t see him in much of anything else. This is a very opposite feeling I have for Velvet who I think was designed solely for the purpose of “looking edgy and hot” and not actually taking into account her personality then make excuses for it in the game. So Vicious is off the hook for me. Mostly!

Yuna is still a bit on my red flag list, I haven’t gotten to know her too well. I still hate the boobs and the kimono pencil skirt. But now there’s the accent. I will be completely honest. I can’t read her lines. I’ve taken a couple French classes so I know what she’s saying, but otherwise it’s really annoying. Currently, it just feels like another way to make her sexy. 

But I now have new nitpicks. Kanata’s design is messy, I’ve thought this since day one but it wasn’t as much of a problem for me until I saw his sprites. The bandage on the hand is useless?????? “Oh it’s to cover his symbol” but Misella and Aegis have their symbol covered by their clothes and it still shows through?  I have things about Kanata. And Misella.

I. Don’t. Understand. Why Misella kept the dress from Kanata’s horrible father? Every friend I know that has trauma (be it sexual or not) gets rid of every single item or piece of entertainment--ANYTHING that person interacted with. Completely gone and avoided. I also don’t know how that trash bag of a human being saw it as attractive. It’s messy and is obviously torn apart (well actually there’s some weird kinks for that), and the only thing really keeping it together is the color scheme. If I don’t look too into it, the design is fine. But there are aspects that annoy me.

And One Extra Criticism 

This ones more of a personal preference... The game is a solid game! And I think it focuses enough on gacha stuff but not forcing it in your face. (I’m waiting until they start collaborating with other franchises, though...) My personal downside to it is that it’s a mobile game. They can’t do as much without a console, so sometimes the skit visuals are limited with what they can do. There have been a few times that I wasn’t quite sure what just happened. 

Also, the announcements popping up unannounced does not agree with my phone. I have a weak phone and weak wifi where I am... So the game can crash on me just from the announcement popping up alone. Imagine having multiple announcements in a row, too. 

And the final thing for me to say is... as good as the plot is with keeping me entertained, the combat does make it get very...boring.... The combat is fun at first! And I love seeing the different moves of different characters. But I personally hate turn-based fights, especially repetitive ones. The fact that they have autoplay and fast-forward buttons shows that they know the battle system can get boring and tedious. Boss fights are at least a little better because you’re more on your toes with trying to keep your characters alive and ganging up on damage before the next turn. But... whenever I see that there’s no story audio, I feel a little disappointed. 

But like I said, this last one is more of a personal preference than an actual criticism. 

I hope this suffices for an answer! Sorry it’s kinda long... And the last thing I want to say is that I really do like Tales of Crestoria! I’ve played it every night when I don’t get lost in Tiktoks... And it’s very fun to see the characters interact with their situations. The plot is also kind of easy for me to predict. Not in a bad way! It just means I look forward to if I’m ever surprised or they take a different turn. 

So compared to when I first heard about it to now, it really has exceeded my expectations. 

[professor-vanad]

Alright, I've made you a guide for having the old guy over. Its relatively lengthy though so I've posted it too my blog under the title "old man porygon care guide" with some pokemon and porygon tags if you need to search for it. So check that out and save it to your blog for later.

As for your question, I did get in contact with silphco when I was doing my whole tedious detective work adventure (and Gordon is asking I let you know that he's making fun of me for "asking silphco" ending up being like step 14 in my figure out porygons past and why he's acting like an old man research quest despite it being the most obvious first step to take)

But they were less than helpful, saying how a lot of the stuff surrounding porygon and how to make them are some sort of company secret not available to the public.

(And from the way you're talking, it sounds like they might not be being completely transparent with researchers either so oof.)

And when I talked about stuff like health concerns for old dude, I couldn't seem to get anyone to even consider them being a beta porygon at all, instead only working under the assumption that he's another failed modders attempt at a porygon evolution like the original context of the dubious disk.

Even after I went through all that effort of tracking down machines able to read information stored in pokeballs that typically isn't displayed publicly when viewing them in a pc, but is instead usually used by law enforcement for returning lost pokemon, which put his first date of capture a good time before porygon were released to the public.

So it would be a heck of a task to pull off a bootleg of something that wasn't publicly available yet.

And I was able to track down and talk too previous owners dating back too 19 years ago, and none of them were particularly tech savvy either.

So that still brought up some worrying stuff that if his weirdness is a mix of being really old AS WELL as from being modded, then he would have been living with the mods for a minimum of 19 years, and still wouldn't have made him NOT a pre-release beta porygon, which was a lingering issue with attempts to talk too silphco people and them not taking me seriously.

They also offered for me to send them the old guy to attempt to repair him, but pretty heavily implied I wouldn't be getting him back if I gave him up, presumably as a way of discouraging irresponsible modding of porygon.

So that's hella suspicious, and I'm not gonna be doing that.

As for proof of chansey eggs improving general porygon quality of life?

I literally only have the few years I've spent with old man porygon for reference, who's apparently super weird for a porygon anyway, so I'm probably the wrong person to figure out that sort of thing. I just know he became a lot less spacy and tired all the time when I switched him too eggs, and later too berrys/pokebeans that are still on the tree/vine once I was able to start growing those myself and the sanctuary pokemon were able to help themselves instead of me buying fruit from the market (though pretty sure that was more an improvement of getting them reasons to go outside on their own regularly instead of napping indoors. Since it wasn't as dramatic a change as the chansey eggs).

But when it comes to fixing him, I guess if it comes to it, and all that can really be done is essentially build a new porygon out of the corpse of the old one, well.... I'm usually all about pokemon being able to learn enough to make their own decisions, but I'm not quite sure that's a concept the old man would really be able to comprehend in his current state.

Regardless though, the obligation would still be to try and have him understand as much as he can and see what they want based on their options.

Although if they imply something like " I want to go home" don't be jumping to conclusions about them asking to die with dignity at home.

He is not very smart and is terrible at euphemisms, so chances are what he would actually mean is "I would rather do difficult thinking on my pillow in the living room at home".

Trust me, I've been burned by their thought process before.

Don't jump to conclusions that they have things figured out or that they understood you unless it's a very simple statement you can get immediate results from like saying "come here" or "do you want food option A or B".

And it wouldn't surprise me if what it took to actually get their consent to such a thing, would be to literally have you travel to the sanctuary and have you sit there with porygon in the houses living room, drawing on whiteboards and using videos and explaining it over and over in slightly different ways until it clicks with him and he gives a straight answer.

I mean I've gotten used to having to go out of my way to find ways to deal with his senility, but that would be a hell of a rigmarole to rope some stranger into.

Heck, I've already gone and frightened my employee Gordon about the possibility of a long and tedious porygon detective adventure part 2 just talking about this stuff.

That post was brilliant! Thank you. I may have a few follow-up questions down the line but this is a great start.

Woof. I... you know, I’ve had multiple run-ins with Silph that have left me uneasy. i can empathise with wanting to “crack-down” on modding for the Porygons’ sake, they’ve had people come to them to fix their lousy mods since the first generation. So, I mean it is a problem of sorts but not as widespread as that attitude would have you believe. Being that blatant is surprising. That’s not to say I don’t believe you, I absolutely do, but I’m surprised that they were that dismissive off the bat. I think you were right to trust your gut there.

There’s a lot about your case that isn’t adding up with what I know, which is only a problem because it’s likely we won’t have a previous case to work off of. 19 years and at least two trainers who, I’m guessing, didn’t really notice anything unusual about Old Dude apart from his size and catch record prior to Porygon’s official release is the most complete dead end I can think of. I reckon I’ll be able to find some information when I take a look at his programming. Though, that will depend on how willing he is to co-operate there.

Which brings me to the possible “fix”. Rest assured, I have no intention of doing anything that Old Dude is uncertain about or uncomfortable with. It’s still only a possibility rather than a certainty and if it came to it, I’d be able to give you both more detailed information. My warning was as much for you because I don’t doubt I’m going to need your help, especially when it comes to communication. Whatever it takes to help him understand, I’m happy to do it. The ‘rigmarole’ is part of the job. He’s no hassle. Even if he was, Arceus knows I have practice. Four of them.

[night-unfurls-its-splendour]

I'm watching the entire series of Game of Thrones for the first time. I've made my way to season 3, making sure to watch as many commentaries as I can. Last night I listened  to the Set Design / Costume Design commentary for S3 Ep 4: "And Now His Watch is Ended".

I know most historical costume Enthusiasts / Critics either don't touch, or make exceptions for Fantasy productions and on the whole I agree with that. But something about the Game of Thrones costumes (and how the show's popularity has impacted costume design on productions actually set in the medieval / Renaissance time period) has just really been bothering me.

(Perhaps you see what I mean here with Contessina De Bardi in Medici: Master's of Florence and her sneaky mini structured neckline)

It may be a couple of things, but lots of the ... insights from Michele Clapton shed some light on this for me. I have a few questions.

First: North of the Wall, we spend some time in this episode with The Night's Watch at Craster's Keep. Of Craster's wives, Clapton said [Disclaimer this is not an *exact* quote because I couldn't find a transcript anywhere and my sister sent back the Netflix DVD and I do not have an idetic memory - but the important parts of the comment are, in my own estimation, accurate] : "With Craster's wives I got this idea of them just having bits of rabbit, whatever they can get, woven with grass..." this raises in my mind, SO many questions.

Firstly - we ARE north of the Wall, yes? Where,  as we have seen, the ground is just about ALWAYS covered in snow, or 90% mud. So where is the grass coming from? And also what they are wearing is so clearly not grass?

This also provides a segue into my second question.

Do sheep exist in Westeros?

Why is it that this show has such an aversion to wool? Every man wearing protective clothing is wearing Leather (or rather I should perhaps say "vegan leather"). Every Hearty Weave (TM) appears to be an attempt at Linen; and every Fine Lady is wearing Silk satin, or if you're Olenna, silk brocade (in obviously hot weather, because naturally elderly ladies benefit from heat stroke).

I've not seen one woollen cloak. Not. One wool... anything really. I ask myself "Why?"

100% natural wool is wondeful. It's naturally flame retardant; it keeps you warm; it breathes well; it's soft in a light weave; it's strong in a heavy one; its water repellent. So what is with this endemic erasure of wool? Even productions like 2018's Mary Queen of Scots have had costume designers like Alexandra Byrne who, when searching for a durable fabric for cold and rainy Scotland, came out with a wardrobe comprised entirely of DENIM. Which,  as we all know is the WARMEST AND MOST COMFORTABLE of fabrics when damp. Now we all know Byrne's real reason for using denim is because it's cheap. The problem is Byrne tried to justify it by saying all of that guff about wanting a fabric that wears well in rain (Which,  I cannot stress this enough- denim does not) and, of course because denim would be "ReLaTaBLe". But I digress.

All that aside, perhaps the things that bother me most are components and composition. Which is where we get into the wooly (heh) area of me being a person with interest in HISTORICAL costume, critiquing a FANTASY series.

So let's just get this out of the way: I'm not saying that anything that the costume Department did with this series was "Wrong" [with one exception, but we'll get to that when we get to it]. I'm just going to say that I don't like the way it was approached, and my reasons on WHY. 

I think I have a modicum of justification for my opinions here because, fantasy is fantasy, yes but the concepts of "Fantasy" and "Medieval" have become so strongly connected that the line between them has become so blurred in the modern mind as to be almost non-existent anymore. We're in a strange cycle here. "Fantasy" was directly inspired by Medieval and over the years took more and more creative wiggle room because, the great thing about fantasy is, you can make it whatever you want it to be aesthetically. But as Fantasy and Medieval have become so intertwined, more and more creative license has been taken with the latter, so that the original inspiration has become beholden to imitate the art it inspired.

But I'll save my pontification on the modern eye and Medieval fashion for another post, and try to keep on track only as far as this affects my feelings on Game of Thrones.

My justification is that GoT is not just inspired by Medieval England/Europe in the broad sense that most Fantasy of the Sword and Sorcery variety is; it was SPECIFICALLY inspired by ONE ERA of English History, The Wars of the Roses [15th century] (with character inspiration from other eras, as recent as the 16th century).

The thing about being interested in Historical Fashion is, once you know it, you can't UN-KNOW it. For example, my understanding of the medieval approach to clothing composition is "Cut as little as you need to because sewing is tedious". You don't want to have to sew more than you have to because what's the point of that? Practically no clothing in the medieval period was tailored because why bother doing that when you can just sinch it with a belt, or lace it up the sides? Is any of that applied here? Nah. Because when we look at Sansa's dresses, look at those obviously machine stitched, perfectly pristine seams. ~whistles~.

I'll never throw shade at a costume department for using sewing machines, but I will shade them for not bothering at all to make clothing for a universe that has no sewing machines look like it was made in a universe that has no sewing machines.

  I can agree with not holding Fantasy series to historical standards - to a point. To wit: as long as it's believable IN-UNIVERSE.

AS FAR AS WE KNOW, the GoT universe doesn't yet have Mechanized looms. Now I know that they make some pretty unreal lace in Myr, but I just can't think of any in-universe justification for the texture of Danny's blue number in season 3.

Another thing that bothers me is the proliferation of corsets and how those corsets are approached.

Here are some historical corset facts.

• the term 'corset' wasn't widely used to refer to structured undergarments outside of France until the late 18th century (1700's). Before tart they were called "stays" (16th-17th century) or "a pair of bodies" (15th-16th century)

• structured undergarments first appeared in the 15th century, as the bodice of under-dresses(kirtles) were lined with reed or Buckram to provide back and breast support and provide a smooth surface for the gown worn over it. It also provided a foundation for multiple layers of petticoats, so the waistbands wouldn't dig into your sides.

• Structured undergarments that existed independent of a kirtle or petticoat aren't in evidence until the 16th century (Elizabethan/Renaissance) and aren't widely used by all classes until the late 17th century.

• Most 16th-17th century boned foundation garments had straps, since they didn't reach down much farther than the natural waist,  unless they were designed with a high back.

• Corsets, stays and other structured undergarments were never worn without a shift/chemise/slip underneath because...

• Corsets chafe.

• Corsets are difficult to clean, but shifts are easy to launder. Shifts protect your skin from chafing and protect your very expensive corset from the oils produced by your skin

(Reproduction example of 15th century style kirtle, from Prior Attire. Source video here)

(Sansa's... corset here has this bizarre low back and 18th century style tabs on the bottom? It also seems to lace only down to her navel. Not quite sure what's going on here, it really doesn't seem to be supporting her at all.)

The reason I hate, hate, hate the way Sansa is costumed under her...  very suit-like gowns is  because she never ever is shown (so far) wearing anything under her corset; her gowns are all long-lined, flowing and loose fitting; and show only wears (usually) one petticoat under them. So in short, I dislike that Sansa wears a corset because Sansa has NO REASON to be wearing one.

◇◇◇◇Another Thing◇◇◇◇

I want to spotlight on a little thing from the commentary that really hits on one of my larger problems with the aesthetic interpretation of this show in general.

During one of the scenes with Stannis and Melisandre, Clapton mentions that they made Melisandre's hair a darker shade of red in season 3 than it was previously. She says the phrase "sort of makes her more earthy".

Yes. Let's make the FIRE priestess more EARTHY. LET'S JUST DO THAT. AS OF THIS SHOW ISN'T "EARTHY" enough.

There's this fantastic quote I read somewhere by GRRM about how he loves fantasy because it's colorful, where real life is gray and brown and olive and dull. Melisandre is arguably the most colourful character in the show/series. In the books, EVERYTHING about her is Red. And not just red. She's scarlet and crimson. When she's introduced there's this fantastic description of her wearing flowing robes of scarlet silk with slashes in it revealing a darker, blood red fabric underneath.

That was passed up for a monotone, very simply cut red gown and I can't stop asking myself why a designer would scrap something like that without even trying to pay homage to it.

This show just sort of takes everything colourful in Martin's world and MAKES it gray and dark for the sake of Gritty Realism (TM). I suppose that's part of trying to appeal to a wider audience, but I just find it increadibly visually uninteresting.

◇◇◇◇ONE MORE LITTLE THING◇◇◇◇

Is this the sofa from the Study in Clue?

???

[spomincica]

I've never heard of this book, but since I'm studying computational linguistics NLP is right up my alley and I'd love to read you rant about it!

This will mostly be the slightly edited essay =D it’s also kinda long so follow the cut =D but first a disclaimer: i think i’m about at least 85% wrong about all of this

Okay so here’s the thing: I don’t outright hate NLP, but I don’t like its application in the classroom, especially how they described it in the book. This book was not part of my obligatory readings (it was elective obligatory, i could pick between like 5 books) and I chose this one specifically because I wanted to be proven wrong? I wanted to get why and how to use the thing in the classroom and I remain unconvinced. 

So, I am a complete cynic who does not believe in any of these new-agey, crystal loving, self-actualization movements. I generally don’t even really believe in motivation: people mostly just do things because they have to and imagining we can cause an outside force that would make people genuinely interested in a tedious activity is just presumptuous. But still, motivation is at least somewhat warranted by explaining to people why they need to do something, rationalizing the activity to them, so they are more likely to do it.

But I’m deffo not a radical. I know I am probably mostly wrong about most things and too cynical about the others, so I mostly ignore my opinions. If meditation works for you, that’s great; I just don’t see the point of it for me. I am more than willing to admit I’m wrong, so I picked up this book skeptical but with a very open mind, excited to learn why and how I was wrong. After reading this book, I can tell you that my mind is now firmly closed. To put it in a metaphor (which I’ve been thinking for well over a week on how to turn it at least vaguely academic but, alas, I cannot): I am a very salt-of-the-earth Midwestern type of a person, and this book is the most LA thing I have ever read in my life (having it end with a Marianne Williamson quote is just the cherry on top of everything).

This is not to say that I don’t find anything in the book to be of any value or that I disagree with everything, not at all. What I do think is that when you read everything, the general concept of the book boils down to be a decent human to your students and acknowledge that they are individuals, not an amorphous mass. I don’t think this is too radical a claim, nor that anyone would really go against it, so I do not quite know why it requires more than one book on it. What I took away from this book is that if you see a student is helped by fidgeting, let them do that. If you see that a student takes different notes than others, but the notes seem to really work for them - let them do that. I think some rules in schools are entirely too restrictive and can be actually damaging to learning, so I think it’s time that teachers get over themselves and let students do things that help them learn. I include myself in this: for example, I hate puppets with a burning passion, but I use them with young learners because they work. So if I see that a student could be helped by this NLP method, even if I deeply and passionately hate it, I think we still should try. But, if we strive for authenticity in teaching, I do not want to lead with this method because I am truly and honestly not the person who this book tries to make me be.

Okay, with this general rant over, let me get into specifics why I did not like this book.

First of all, just the general structure is very weird. The language is very non-academic, and the book reads very much like a self-help book more than something at least vaguely academic. I have my own problems and rants about the inaccessibility and limitations of academic language and writing. However, there is still a line you have to walk to be a useful guide for teachers, and this book just doesn’t do that. The stories that are meant as lead-ins for topics break the flow entirely and usually leave you with more questions than answers. 

What I hate most is the chapter titled “Changing words, changing minds” (49-50). With the caveat that my MA thesis is literally about persuasion in political discourse, so I clearly think language can be used to persuade people; this chapter is just pure and total manipulation and they mask it as SOMETHING POSITIVE. I cannot believe that it marks “reframing” (49) as something positive, which should be imitated, not something that’s actually frowned upon and what people usually mock. Language should be precise, or it should not exist. Especially in the classroom. I would rather know that my answer is wrong so I can get it right next time; than be told: “This might be the suboptimal choice.” And you have to realize that my self-confidence is not the best, and I still clearly remember every time any teacher or figure of authority told me something I said/did was wrong. Still, I would rather have that “traumatic” memories than be coddled and live, not knowing I make the same constant mistakes. Sometimes negative reinforcement works better than positive - which brings me to logical fallacies they make in this book. Mistakes are the best teachers (48), they claim, yet we cannot point to those mistakes. Language should be precise (65) but reframe every negative thought you have.  

To end on a more positive note: I did like that they offered activities even though I mostly didn’t like them. That made the book less abstract and, therefore, more useful for people who can buy into the method (which again, I’m not religiously against the technique, it’s just not something I would willingly use). Most of the activities seem such that they could very easily backfire. I can just imagine the sports class I taught last year during my teaching practice laughing when you come in with a guided meditation. Any legitimate benefit it might have, immediately lost. I would just once again like to reaffirm that even though this reflection is very negative, I can see the value of the method, but it really just boils down to be kind to people and view them as individuals, and I feel like that does not require a full philosophy.  I did find a copy of another book by the authors in a language school where I teach, so I might also check out that one to see if that one convinces me, because again: I do believe i’m like 85% wrong here.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

LOVE YOUR BLOG!

Hi Nonny!!

Thank you! I’m glad you’re enjoying my blog!!! You’re in luck, because I LOVE LOVE LOVE slow burn fics!!! First, let me direct you to this post here, where I have a list of Platonics, Fluff, and Bedsharing fics! You also might enjoy my MONSTROUS Pining Sherlock Fic Rec List, because it’s also one of my all-time fave tropes. And my Epistolary / Texting / Letters Fic Recs! (there, I think I got all of the ones I was thinking of)

Next, you can check out ALL my fic recs on this masterpage here, in case I missed any! It’s updated every time the third reblog of the post hits my dash! :)

Finally, I shall take this opportunity to share one of the two last sections I have collected on my offline document of the fluff fics :) (I’ll share the last one when someone unknowingly brings it up, LOL. ‘Cause I’m a jerk like that, LOL.)

You’re lucky that I LOVE SLOW BURN FICS, especially fluffy ones (I also have an angst slow burn list but I’ll save that for one of the MANY angst requests I got!) HERE WE ARE! This is byfar not all I have, but just currently all I have sorted so far! I have SO MANY and am still working through my bookmarks, LOL! Hope you enjoy!

LOVE CONFESSIONS / SLOW BURN / DEVELOPING REL.

New Year, New Beginning by DaisyFairy (T, 810 w. || New Year’s Eve, John POV, Post S4, Friends to Lovers) – New Year at a crime scene and John makes a decision.

Ex by Itsallfine (T, 1,248 w. || Love Confessions, Coming Out, Exes, First Kiss) – One night, in the midst of their post-case high and on the cusp of something more, John and Sherlock run into John’s ex. His ex-boyfriend.

There’s Always Three of Us by Itsallfine (T, 1,765 w. || Post-S4, Parentlock, Love Declarations, First Kiss, Anniversary, S4 Fix it Fic, Fluff) – Sherlock takes John and Rosie out to Angelo’s and gets a chance to correct the biggest mistake of his life.

Want by siennna (T, 1,806 w. || Fluff, Pining, First Kiss, POV Sherlock, Requited, Second Person POV) – When John speaks, you hear more than words. You hear the rise and fall of his tone, the comfortable quake of his laughter, the warm pauses of silence in between. When John laughs, there are stars glittering on his tongue and galaxies resting just behind his teeth, and you wish you could press your lips there and burrow into the warm sound. Part 6 of sienna’s favourites

The Marriage Proposal Negotiation by Goddess_of_the_Night (G, 2,161 w. || Dev. Rel., Possessive Sherlock, Insecure Sherlock, Fluff, First Kiss, Post Mary) – Sherlock hasn’t ever really done anything the traditional way, so of course it wouldn’t bother him to propose to John even though they’re not even dating. And the fact that John is already on a date with someone else when he decides to do it? Tedious.

Moonlight by ConsultingPurplePants (E, 2,213 w. || First Time, Scars, Camping, Sherlock’s Bum) – Sherlock is standing near the door, wearing, for what John thinks may be the first time in their acquaintance, jeans and a jumper. John drags his eyes away from the way the jeans cling to Sherlock’s just-muscled-enough legs to notice that Sherlock is wearing his own backpack, and is also carrying a collapsed tent. John’s jaw drops open. Is he about to go camping with Sherlock Holmes!?

The Case of the Made-Up Case by DoubleNegative (T, 2,394 || Fake Relationship, Clubbing, First Kiss, For Science) - Sherlock takes John to a club. For a “case.” Yes, John, a case. Part 1 of The (Secret) Adventures of Sherlock Holmes

No Strings Attached by Elster (G, 2,714 w. || Magical Realism, Fairy Tales, Love Confessions, Fae/Faeries) – To save John from being spirited away Under the Hill, Sherlock challenges the fairy queen to a fiddle contest.

What He’s Like by magikspell (E, 2,919 w. || Love Confessions, Fluff, First Time, Inexperienced Sherlock) – Realistic first time. They love each other so much.

Right Foot Red by Irrevocably_Sherlocked (E, 3,089 w. || First Time, Board Games, Frottage, Masturbation, Frottage, PWP) – …ok, it’s juvenile, but at least it’s a game where touching is allowed. And if something more were to happen, well, John can’t say he’d be too upset about that. “What are the rules of this game?” Sherlock asks, the disdain evident on the word ‘game’. “I spin, you do as I say.” John thinks he sees a slight widening of those pale grey eyes at that, just for a fraction of a second, before it is shut down. Oh, this is interesting, he thinks.

Affirmation by jamlockk (E, 3,096 w. || First Time, Dev. Rel., PWP, Love Declarations, Emotional Sherlock, Comforting John, Gross Fluff) – “Sunlight dappled John’s skin, casting a glow across his spreadeagled form as he dozed among the rumpled sheets. Sherlock knew the expression on his face was hopelessly soft but for once did not care about showing his true feelings so openly. He simply stood there, in the doorway, gazing at the impossibly beautiful man currently snuffling softly in his slumber.” Part 8 of All the ways we love

It Wasn’t Just the Mistletoe by Irrevocably_Sherlocked (E, 3,593 w. || Christmas Fluff, Mistletoe, First Kiss / Time, Frottage, Masturbation) – Sherlock and John just stood there, seemingly frozen. Sherlock was desperately trying to think of a way out of this. There was no way he could kiss John, even a small kiss, and not have him know immediately how he felt. Sherlock could lie, and fake and sham, but there was no way he could hide this.

Christmas at Holmes Cottage by johnlockedstarkid (G, 4,295 w. || Christmas, Fake Relationship, Love Confessions, Holmes Family, Pining, Kisses, Fluff, Allusions to Mystrade) – Sherlock doesn’t want to have to deal with his mother’s wishes for him to find a partner when he goes to visit them for Christmas, so asks John to pose as his boyfriend. Little does he know he’s not the only one who wishes that the relationship could be real.

Forty-four by jamlockk (E, 4,415 w. || John’s Birthday, Fluff, PWP) – John turns forty-four, gets some advice and the best birthday present he could’ve ever hoped for.

How Will I Know? by eragon19 (E, 4,895 w. || Pining, Love Confessions, POV Sherlock, Fluff, Sherlock’s Imagination, Papa Lestrade) – Here was the problem: Sherlock Holmes was completely and irrevocably in love with John Watson, and he had absolutely no idea how to tell him.

Sociopathy and Other Fibs by kinklock (M, 5,314 w. || 5+1, Miscommunication, Humour, Friends to Lovers, Post S3, Love Confessions) – Five times John called Sherlock out, and one time Sherlock returned the favour.

Tease You Till You Come by phoenix089 (E, 6,090 w. || First Time, Clueless Sherlock, Texting) – Initially, Sherlock was rather put out by John’s lack of presence on the case. But then he starts to recieve pictures, several of them, of an unexpected nature. The case is forgotten rather quickly after that.

Closeted by sussexbound (T, 6,115 w. || Love Confession, First Kiss, Games) – Sherlock and John get trapped in a closet while on a case. Some revelations are made while they play a game to pass the time. Part 1 of Intimacy

Naked by sussexbound (E, 6,166 w. || Fluff, Frottage, Love Declarations, First Time, Intimacy) – This is the sequel to Closeted and MUST be read. It’s so good! Sherlock is soft and clueless and John is just John. Part 2 of Intimacy

Onomatopoeia by aquabelacqua (M, 6,904 w. || First Time/Kiss, Frottage, Dirty Talk, Domestics, Word Kink) – Something is the matter with John. Sherlock is determined to figure out what it is. Mark his words.

What Meets the Eye by worldaccordingtofangirls (M, 8,251 w. || Amnesia, Fluff) – Amnesia is just another case to solve. Piece together unfamiliar faces, reconstruct the old identity, the lost reality. A challenge that Sherlock could even enjoy. He can read people like books. The man with the silver hair is his boss. The tottering old woman, his landlady. The girl with the worried look in her eyes…infatuated. And as for John Watson? His husband. Obviously.

The Thin Line by Odamaki (M, 10,809 w. || Virgin Sherlock, Awkwardness, Confessions, First Times, Anal) – John swallows. Keeps his eyes on Sherlock. Begs him not to ruin him.Sherlock leans forward over the witness box ever-so slightly, “I was distracted,” he informs the court, “by my partner, John Watson.”

Iris by slashscribe (E, 11,948 w. | Parentlock, Pining Sherlock, Post-S3) – Sherlock does his best to make John happy when John comes back to 221B with his new baby after the events of Season 3, but Sherlock has a track record of getting things wrong in this area. This story is an exploration of their gradual shift from friends to lovers, told from Sherlock’s perspective, full of a lot of pining and lack of emotional awareness.

Speaker for the Bees by antietamfalls (M, 14,649 w. || Deaf Sherlock, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss / Time, Fluff, Sign Language) – It isn’t always easy assisting a deaf detective. Luckily for John, they make a pretty good team.

A Silver Sixpence by doodle (E , 16,400 w. || LIVEJOURNAL || Fake Relationship, Fake Marriage, Case Fic, ) - John and Sherlock have to get married for a case, and learn some things about each other. I LOVE LOVE LOVE this story, though it’s on LJ.

At the Edge of Desire by philalethia (E, 16,375 w. || Post S3, Pining, Arse Worship, Humour, First Kiss / TIme, Sexual Fantasy, Awkwardness) – While helping John move back in to the flat, Sherlock discovers a strap-on among John’s things. He finds the discovery considerably difficult to move past.

The Effect of Memory by testosterone_tea (E, 6,430 || Praise Kink, First Kiss / Time, Fluff, Smut, Virgin Sherlock, Love Confessions, Confused Sherlock) – John has temporary amnesia coming off of anaesthesia after an operation and not only does he not recognize Sherlock, he starts flirting with him! After John recovers, he doesn’t remember the incident at all. But Sherlock does. Confusion ensues.

Tap by doctorcaseyholmes (G, 896w || Fluff, Morse Code) – Sherlock finds an unobtrusive way to let out his feelings for John.

A Need To Know Basis by mattsloved1 (G, 934 w. || Humour, Romance) – As the cab door shut firmly, the DI had yelled out they were to make an appearance at Scotland Yard the next day. It was while John watched London pass by that it happened.

BBCSH ‘How To Save A Life’ by tigersilver (T, 2,784 w. || First Kiss, Angsty Schmoop, Requited Love) – Pining, requited, and unabated spates of ‘first kiss’ fluff. Post Mary, AU, mildly cracky. John lays a smooch on Sherlock’s nape in passing. The world does that thing it does when it wobbles and Sherlock practically falls off his own pins. Part 1 of 'How To…’

A Bit of Indulgence by beltainefaerie (NR | 3,364 w. || Fake/Pretend Relationship, Developing Relationship, Love Declarations) - A case leads John and Sherlock to fake being boyfriends and John runs into an old acquaintance.

Once is Enough by Jominerva for inkandsoul (T, 3,030 w. || Love Confessions, Domestic Fluff, Whump) – Just as the earth rises to meet the sun at every mountain crest, John reaches out for Sherlock and takes his hand in his own.“Tell me it won’t end like this,” he says, blue eyes holding grey while he laces their fingers together. Sherlock lets out a shaky laugh and shakes his head. “I wish I could.”

A Lifetime Together by LondonGypsy (M, 8,886 w. || Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Falling in Love, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Pining Idiots, Alternating POVs, Domestics, Retirement) – John and Sherlock falling in love.

The Newlywed Game: Johnlock Edition by patternofdefiance (E, 9,020 w. || Fake Relationship, Fake Marriage, Friends to Lovers, Humour, Romance, Smut, Case Fic, Self-Esteem Issues) – John and Sherlock pretend to be married in order to be contestants in a Newlywed Game. Of course it’s for a case. Of course it doesn’t stay that way. Part 8 of I Blame Tumblr

Merlot by Itsallfine (E, 14,844 w. || Christmas, Pining Sherlock, Wine, Slow Burn, First Kiss / Time, Love Confessions, Wine, Holmes Family) – Sherlock and John work toward becoming something more as they prepare to host the Holmes parents at 221B for the holidays. Part of 25 Days of Fic-Mas 2015.

Twelfth Night by yourdykeinshiningarmor (E, 15,139 w. || Friends to Lovers, Fake Rel., Fluff and Angst, Mutual Pining) - John is invited to his aunt’s Twelfth Night ball. Sherlock offers to attend with him as a friendly face among strangers, but John’s family force him to address his true feelings for Sherlock. [[this one is cute]]

About Sleep and Coffee and the Existence of Fate by Atiki (E, 17,426 w. || Fluff, Marriage Proposal, Humour, 5+1) – Naturally, John was startled when suddenly the ultimate solution occurred to him: Marriage. This was, of course, a bit of a fundamental problem rather than an actual solution. One didn’t simply use the words “Sherlock” and “marriage” within the same sentence. Not even in a hypothetical context. Five times John kind of wanted to propose to Sherlock, and one time he didn’t have to.

Once More, With Feeling by cellard00rs (T, 21,178 w. || John’s Family, Fake Relationship, Romance, Fluff, Humour) – To put off his meddlesome, matchmaking mother, John convinces Sherlock to play the role of his significant other. Unparalleled awkwardness ensues.

The Norwood Love Builders by flawedamythyst (T, 47,798 w. || Fake Relationship, Slow Burn, Post TRF Angst) – Sherlock and John go undercover to solve the murder of Joanna Oldacre, but things are complicated by the many feelings John has been repressing in the wake of Sherlock’s faked death and return.

No Good Without You by textsandscones (T, 4021 w. || Case Fic, Busking, Violins, Fluff) – A diverting new case surrounding musicians and stolen instruments captures Sherlock’s attention, the consequences of which lead both detective and doctor to see one another in a different light. Part 1 of Prompt Fills

The Importance of Torn Papers by MyLittleCornerOfSherlock (G, 2427 w || Pre-Slash, Love Declarations, Fluff) – Little things make a big difference, even little notes of thanks. Small reminders to show he cares.

Laid Bare by esplanade (T, 6529 w. || Romance, Fluff, Pining, Angst) – “I suppose it comes as no surprise that I always rather detested grand romantic gestures. They struck me as unnecessary and contrived, feeble attempts at desperately holding together relationships, most of which should have been allowed to fall apart.”

Law of Reciprocals by thequeergiraffe (T, 4377 w. || Fluff, Angst) – “Law of Reciprocals, is it? You’ve saved my life enough times. I figure, turnabout’s fair play.” Sherlock finds ways to reciprocate his appreciation of John.

Pleasure to Burn by scullyseviltwin (E, 17,863 w. || Firefighter AU, Firefighter John / Arson Investigator Sherlock, Slow Burn, Pining, Case Fic-ish) – “If you’d kindly stop knocking about in there and destroying all of my evidence, it would be most appreciated!” John groaned and for a moment rested his head against the side of the truck. Of course he was the only captain left on the scene, which meant he would have to be the one to deal with the arson investigator.

A Life Well-Lived by Kate_Lear (E, 20,121 w. || Original Male Character, Sherlock Woos John, Jealous Sherlock, Reluctant Bi-John) – John got scared off men by an abusive past relationship. Sherlock has to try and woo him while not scaring him off with protective possessive rage.

“finally kiss the bloody idiot” by Salambo06 (E, 29,812 w. || Mutual Pining, Declarations of Love, First Kiss / Time, Angst, Misunderstandings, Fantasies POV John) – Inspired by a fic idea on tumblr : “John and Sherlock know the Yard has a pool going for when they’re finally going to get together. It’s been running forever, and it’s worth thousands of pounds. It’s all fun and games, hahaha, until they find out Lestrade is in dire financial straits (dog needs emergency surgery, he’s putting his kid through gymnastics training, I don’t know, something), and they decide to fake a relationship to win the pool for him. Sherlock figures out the day and way that Lestrade thinks it’s going to happen, and they act it out. It’s all for a good cause, fake relationship style, until it’s not.” Part 1 of The Pool

Hitting the Water at Sixty Miles an Hour by what_alchemy (E, 30,568 w. || Fake Rel., Roadtrips, Slow Burn) – “You love your mother, Sherlock?” John watched the muscles in Sherlock’s jaw jump. He nodded in one sharp jerk.“Then we’re going to her party and making her happy.” John let out a resigned sigh. “As a ruddy couple, you bastard.”

A Study In Auto-Signatures, Sniper Dolphins, and Sex Holidays by cwb (E, 32,690 w. || Case Fic, Post S3, Evil Mary, Dev. Rel., Honeymoon, Epistolary, Bottomlock, First Kiss / Time, Fluff, Secret Agents, BAMF!John) – John and Mary go on their sex holiday, and Sherlock is grumpy and pining about it. Part 1 of HOT DOLPHIN SEX

Bedtime Stories by Liketheriver (M, 34,388 w. || Emotional H/C, Romance, Angst & Humour, Bed Sharing, John First Person, TRF, John Whump) – John’s POV during Season 2 and beyond when Sherlock takes up semi-permanent residence in his bed. A collection of codas and missing scenes wrapped up into one long fic and topped with a bow that takes the story beyond Reichenbach and into happy territory once more. Part 1 of Bedtime Universe

LHR-HNL by scullyseviltwin (E, 35,066 w. || Hawaiian Vacation, Post-TRF, Friends To Lovers, Slow Burn, Just Talk Already, Drinking, Mutual Pining) – In need of an endangered flora sample, Sherlock and John must make a trip to an unexpected destination.

once upon a time by darcylindbergh (M, 6,501 w. || Fluff and Angst, First Kiss / Time, Love Declarations, Christmas) – It starts with a wish. In the beginning, John comes home. Part 1 of things fairy tales are made of

The Newlywed Game: Johnlock Edition by patternofdefiance (E, 9020 w. || Fake Rel., Friends to Lovers, Humour, Romance, Smut) – What it says on the tin: John and Sherlock pretend to be married in order to be contestants in a Newlywed Game. Of course it’s for a case. Of course it doesn’t stay that way. Part 8 of I Blame Tumblr

Turbulence in the Sky by esplanade (T, Fluff, Pining, Anxious Sherlock, Love Confessions) – “But some things needed to stay secret. Or at least, that was what he told himself every time he lost his nerve.”

You fit me, Sherlock Holmes by orphan_account (G, 10,077 w. || Fluff, Slow Burn, Idiots in Love, Experiments) – An unfortunate series of events leads to John accepting being a part of Sherlock’s study in physical intimacy. As the days pass by, John realizes he might be in for more than he bargained for. He doesn’t entirely mind.

Bread and Wine and Curry Once a Week by cwb (E, 8737 w. || Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Stroppy Sherlock, Love Letters, POV John) – Sherlock asks John for relationship advice. Little does he know that it’s him that Sherlock is in love with.

Correspondence by Cleo2010 (T, 8,031 w. || Letters, Friends to Lovers, Jealousy, Pining) – Sherlock’s been spirited away on a case for Mycroft. Part of the deal was that he and John could communicate via letter until the case was completed. Maybe the cliche is true, absence does make the heart grow fonder. Or perhaps something is growing on the feet in the fridge.Read their letters month by month. Written after series one.

Turn the key, and come home by TooManyChoices (M, 2,718 w. || Angst/Humour, First Time/Kiss, Happy Ending) – Sherlock and John have been dancing around what’s between them for years. Will John return to Baker Street, and if so, will things ever be the same?

Overture by Kate_Lear for fengirl88 (M, 4,435 w. || Friends to Lovers, First Time) – A short snippet on how John and Sherlock might have got together.

Acceptable Behaviour by bbcatemysoul (M, 3449 w. || Fluff, Dev. Rel., Miscommunication, First Time) – Sherlock isn’t really sure why John wants to shag him, but he’s certain that if he’s careful to behave properly about it, John can be persuaded to keep doing it. In other news, John is a good boyfriend and Sherlock is an idiot.

First Night Out by verityburns (M, 3251 w. || Romance, Christmas, Dev. Rel.) – As John recovers from the effects of a brutal kidnapping, he and Sherlock attend the Yarders’ Christmas Party. There are… developments on the dance floor…

Confessions by crimsonwinter (T, 4711 w. || Love Confessions, Fluff) – John and Sherlock finally confess their love for each other.

that thing you like by misspamela (E, 7165 w. || Holmes Family, Fake Relationship, Friends to Lovers) – “Happy Christmas, etc. etc.” Sherlock and John go to the Holmes’ for Christmas, and everyone thinks they’re together.

Their Great Reward by BeautifulFiction (T, 10,095 w. || UST, First Kiss, Fluff) – Boxing day, in John’s opinions, is the worst day of the year. Christmas is over, the tree is wilting and stripped of gifts, and there’s a week of dead-time until the clean slate of the new year. However the combination of a blizzard, a power-cut and Sherlock might just make it a day to remember.

Matters of National Security by mistyzeo (E, 8465 w. || Jealous Sherlock, First Time, RST, Idiots in Love, Frottage) – John starts dating a male client of Sherlock’s, and Sherlock can’t figure out why he’s so incensed about it.

Paparazzi by SilentAuror (E, 10,543 w. || Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Post S3) – John moves back into 221B Baker Street after his marriage falls apart and the paparazzi won’t leave him and Sherlock alone about the status of their supposed relationship. Sherlock, of course, never denies it, until one day he does…

At the Heart of it All by SilentAuror (E, 19,812 w. || Virgin Sherlock, Post S3, POV John, Domestics, First Time, Kissing, Romance) – John has been back at Baker Street for four months now and thinks it’s about time they had the Talk to see whether or not they could be more than friends. Sherlock has a lot of uncertainty about this concept for multiple reasons. Unabashed romance.

Hallowed Eve by EventHorizon (T, 14,750 w. || First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Halloween) – It probably wasn’t the smartest idea to let Sherlock choose the costumes for Halloween, but John never considered himself the smartest man in the room, anyway.

Once More, With Feeling by cellard00rs (T, 21,178 w. || Humour, Romance, Fluff, Fake Rel.) - To put off his meddlesome, matchmaking mother, John convinces Sherlock to play the role of his significant other. Unparalleled awkwardness ensues. [[nice amount of fluff and pining!]]

Brief Conversations with the Woman by May_Shepard (E, 21,906 w. || Pining, Love Fairy Irene, Filler Fic, UST/URT, Drug Use, Clueless Sherlock, Relationship Advice, Angst w/ Happy Ending) – Sherlock has a puzzle to solve, and his name is John Watson.

Tomorrow’s Song by agirlsname (M, 24,645 w. || Post-TRF, POV Sherlock, Angst with a Happy Ending, Virgin / Repressed Sherlock, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Pining) – How can he think a relationship with me would be a good idea? I am the sort of person to take a break from my life and when I come back after two years, I expect to find it exactly as I left it. In reality I find it shattered to pieces. (I actually equate you with my life. When did I start doing that?)

State of Flux by Atiki (E, 24,655 w. || Sherlock POV, Slow Burn, First Kiss/Time, Friends to Lovers, Frottage, Cuddles and Snuggles, Awkwardness, Insecure/Virgin Sherlock, Romance) – John’s marriage is over and he is finally back home (i.e. at Baker Street, where he belongs). Sherlock is awfully insecure and John is awfully hesitant, and they’re both awkward idiots, of course, but they figure it out. Many First Times happen.

Don’t Leave Anything Out by lookupkate (E, 27,422w. || Epistolary, Falling in Love, Misunderstandings, Alternate First Meeting) – The first letter John writes home from Afghanistan is meant to go to a woman he went on only one date with. How it ends up in Sherlock’s hands is completely innocent. What happens next is not. What do you do when you find out the person you’re in love with has been lying about something as monumental as who they are? What do you do when you’re the one who lied? How on earth do you put the pieces back together?

Hitting the Water at Sixty Miles an Hour by what_alchemy (E, 30,568 w. || Road Trips, Fake Rel., Family) “You love your mother, Sherlock?”John watched the muscles in Sherlock’s jaw jump. He nodded in one sharp jerk. “Then we’re going to her party and making her happy.” John let out a resigned sigh. “As a ruddy couple, you bastard.” (FAVE!)

The Sum of His Parts by CommonNonsense (T, 4,311 w. || Body Worship, First Kiss / Time) – There are eleven major organ systems in the human body. Sherlock knows about all of them to some degree, but none fascinate him as much as the ones that make up John Watson.

The Detective and the Pin-Up by XistentialAngst (T, 15,683 w. || Romance, Humour, First Time/Kiss) – Sally Donovan discovers an old secret John Watson considered long buried - a ten-year old “Men of the Armed Forces” calendar, which has John as a very enticing pin-up for August. The image of John might just change the way everyone sees the unassuming sidekick, even Sherlock Holmes.

Unwasted by patternofdefiance (E, 8,966 w. || First Time, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Dev. Rel. Smut) – John finds it three months after he’s moved back.He’s on the hunt for something to make for dinner, is scrounging through the cupboards, when he happens upon the graveyard of pasta boxes Sherlock still seems to create when left to his own devices. Behind seven boxes of pasta, all almost completely empty, is a dark-glassed bottle, with a paler coat of dust. It’s unopened. John’s face falls slack when he sees it, instantly recognises it, and for a long moment he just stands and looks at it.

Wars We Fought, Things We’re Not by blueink3 (M, 55,204 w. || Parentlock, Fluff & Angst, Kidnapping, Whump, Post-TAB, UST, Slow Burn, Couple for a Case) –  Five months after John’s world has fallen apart, Mycroft sends the consulting detective and his doctor on a case that neither is prepared for.

The Case of the Vanishing Pants by SwissMiss (E, 44,025 w. || Post-TRF, Case Fic, UST, Homophobia, Friends to Lovers) – Five times John and Sherlock lost their pants in the course of a case.

Anytime by SilentAuror (E, 17,995 w. || UST, Porn With Feels, POV Sherlock, Romance, UST/URT, Happy Ending, Drunken Endeavors) – Sherlock blinks and attempts to focus. There is a little too much vodka in his veins at the moment and it’s having an unfortunate effect on his brain and retinas both. There are two Johns sitting across from him, and both of them are frowning at him.“You’re drunk,” the Johns tell him. Sherlock blinks some more. “Says the man with Mrs Hudson’s doily on his head.”

John Watson doesn’t have a Boyfriend by naughtyspirit (E, 18,932 w. || UST / URT, Fluff & Smut, Voyeurism, Masturbation) – John’s date has gone very well. Sherlock requires tea. John wishes he hadn’t resolved that their relationship was strictly hands off and isn’t about to address it.Unless he has to. Smut, fluff and shower time for a naked John Watson.

Just a Kiss by emmagrant01 (E, 19,695 w. || Case Fic, 5+1, For a Case) – Five times John and Sherlock kissed because of a case and one time they kissed for real. (Chapter 7 is the one you want :D)

You Can Imagine the Christmas Dinners by ardenteurophile  (T, 23,584 w. || Humour, Romance, Drama, Fluff & Angst) Sherlock takes John along for Christmas dinner with Mycroft and Mummy (And “Anthea”, too). Over the course of the evening, John realises that everyone in the room - apart from him - seems to think that he and Sherlock are a couple. Part 2 of Xmas Dinners Verse (I LOVE THIS ONE)

Bedroom Tales by Junejuly15 (M, 49,950 w. || Friends to Lovers, Through the Years, H/C, Military Kink, First Kiss / Time, Romance, Insecure Sherlock, Voyeurism, Post-TRF, Ficlets, Fluff and Angst, Fix-It Fics) – Bedroom Tales is a collection of John and Sherlock ficletsThey are set at various stages of their relationship and are in no particular order. Some are fluffy, some sexy, some angsty, there is hurt and comfort, romance and love. What unites them is that they all play in a bedroom, but not necessarily the one in 221B.

John Watson’s Twelve Days of Christmas by earlgreytea68 (M, 53,464 w. || Christmas, Holmes Family, Fake Relationship, Alternate First Meeting, Falling in Love, Fluff and Angst, Hardcore Pining) – It’s the holiday season. John Watson needs money. Sherlock Holmes needs something else.

Uphill by scullyseviltwin (E, 77,750 w. || Olympics AU || Sherlock POV, Skier!Sherlock / Medic!John, Rivalry, 2014 Olympics, Happy Ending) – Sherlock Holmes is striving for gold in this, his fourth and final Olympics as a downhill Alpine racer.

Definitions by siennna (T, 101,528 w. || Dev. Rel., Pining, Fluff and Romance, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Fluff, Cuddles) – Sherlock’s journey in defining his flat mate and stumbling through the muddled world of emotion.{{This feels complete; the chapter count is listed as ? but I feel like it is done}}

between each beat are words unsaid by darcylindbergh, hudders-and-hiddles (T, 107,998 w. || Epistolary, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Angst, Happy Ending) – On their wedding night, John and Sherlock gift each other with the things they each said when the other could not hear, the things they each put down where the other could not see: a collection of writings that illustrate the way their love for one another has grown over the years. Part 1 of between each beat